Chastening and love may well bee matcht together , they are like to Iacob and Rachel , though there be seven yeares of service more , yet Rachel will bee had at last : but chastening and indignation are as badly matcht as may bee , for chastening enclines to conversion , and indignation is wholy bent upon confusion ; oh therefore , match thy chastening with love , and not with indignation , that so , at least , I may come at last , to enjoy my Rachel , that is , thy favour : Chastening and love , may lodge both together in the bowels of a father , but indignation comes not where bowels are : and how then , O God , canst thou chasten me in indignation , but thou must as it were disbowell thy selfe , and utterly abandon the name of a Father ? and shall any thing make thee to leave that Name ? I know , O God , it is a name so deare unto thee , that I hope I shall commit no such sinne ; and suffer mee not O God , to commit any such sinne as shall ever be able to make thee abandon it . Indeed here , where wee call thee Lord , indignation may appeare , and bee bold to shew it selfe : but when wee come to name thee Father , indignation must be gone , and never presume to come in place . If thy chastening bee intended for reforming , or for polishing , what wouldst thou doe with indignation , that tends to abolishing ? And if thou chasten whom thou lovest , and then destroy whom thou chastenest ; what difference will there bee betweene thy indignation , and thy mercy ? Oh let not thy chastening , which is ordained to be a rod for thy children , be made a knife to slaughter thy Children : Consider , O God , I am but a pot made of brittle Clay , that if thy hand hold not a temper in striking , I shall soone bee broken , and beaten in pieces , and then thy workmanship will bee defaced . And shall it ever bee sayd of thee , that with one hand thou makest , and with the other hand destroyest ? Remember O God , whose title it is , to bee a destroyer : thy title is to bee a Creator : and shall I finde no more favour at the hands of a Creator , then I might looke to finde at the hands of a destroyer ?

Alas , my soule , I know full well , it were a grievous case for mee , if God should let his chastening and his indignation joyne together , and assayle mee with them both at once ; but how shall I doe to keepe them asunder ? Have I any Moses to stand for mee in the gap ? Blessed be thy glorious Name , O God : I have indeed a greater then Moses , even him , whom thou didst chasten in thy heavie displeasure ; to the end thou mightst not chasten mee in thy heavie displeasure ; for his agonie of crying , My God , My God , why hast thou forsaken mee ; gives mee boldnesse to cry , and confidence in crying , My God , My God , have mercy upon mee : This I know will helpe , when all other helps sayle . But what have I in my selfe to plead , why God should not chasten mee in his heavie displeasure ? Can I say , I have not deserved it ? Or can I say I have not even provoked him to doe it ? Alas , O God , I have nothing in thee to flie to , but onely thy mercy ; nothing in my selfe to plead , but onely my weaknesse ; Have mercy upon mee , O God , Verse 2 for I am weake .

But is not this a weak Plea , to alleage weaknesse for a Plea ? weak indeed with men , who commonly tread hardest upon the weakest , and are ever going over where the hedge is lowest ; but no weake Plea with God , whose mercy is ever readie upon all occasions , and then most , when there is most need : and seeing there is greatest need , where there is greatest weaknesse , therefore no Plea with God so strong as this ; Have mercy upon me , O God , for I am weake .

But why should David pray for mercy to helpe his weaknesse ? for what can mercy do ? Mercy can but pitty his weaknes , it is strength that must relieve it . But is it not , that mercy , I may say , is as the steward of Gods house , and hath the command of all he hath : that if wisedome be wanting for direction , mercy can procure it . If justice be wanting for defence , Mercy can obtain it : If strength be wanting for support , Mercy can command it : and therefore no Plea so perfect to bee urged with God , as this , Have mercy upon mee , O God , for I am weake .

But why should David make his weaknesse a motive to God for mercy ? for is not weaknesse an effect of sinne ? and can God love the effect , when hee hates the cause ? but it is not the weakenesse in David that God loves , but the acknowledging of his weaknesse : for what is this , but the true humility ? and who knowes not in how high account such humility is with God , seeing it is indeed of this wonderfull condition , that though nothing be so low , yet nothing reacheth so high , and therefore no motive so fit to move God , as this ; Have mercy upon mee , O God , for I am weake . Mercy indeed looks downe upon no object so directly , as upon weakenesse ; and weakenesse lookes up to no object so directly as to mercy : and therefore they cannot chuse but meete , and meeting , not chuse but embrace each other . Mercy , weaknesse as her Clyent : weaknesse , Mercy as her Patron : that no Plea can bee with God so strong , as this , Have mercy upon mee , O God , for I am weake . Let thy indignation , O God , be layd upon Pharaoh , and such as trust in their strength , for upon them thou maist get thee honour : but alas , what honour can bee gotten , by pouring thy indignation upon so weake a Creature as I am ? Thy honour shall bee as much to support my weaknesse by thy mercy ; as to abate their pride , by thine indignation .

But what though David be weak ? is every weaknes sufficient cause to run to God about ? might he not take Restoratives and Cordialls , and such other comfortable things , and so help his weaknesse without going to God ? O my soule , what comfort is in a Cordiall , if it be not of Gods making ? what strength in a Restorative , if it be not of Gods giving ? No , O Lord , thy mercy is the only restorative that can help my weaknesse ; the true Aqua Coelestis , to comfort my spirits .

I know , O God , thou sweetly disposest all things both in weight and measure ; Thou considerest man that he is but dust ; Thou knowest mee , that I am a worme , and no man ; and can it then be thou shouldst have no consideration of my weaknesse ? wilt thou not proportion thy burthen to the bearer ? wilt thou loade a Gnat , as thou wouldst loade a Camell ? Oh have mercy upon mee , O God , and consider my weaknesse , for I am weake .

But why should David make his weaknesse ; a cause for God to spare him ? for how came hee by his weaknesse ? was it not by his owne disorder ? and then , if his weaknesse be one of his faults , hath not God just cause to strike him the harder for his weaknesse ? It seemes , indeed , that David cannot deny but that he deserves it , and therefore layes not his Plea in the Court of Gods justice , but of his mercy ; for his mercie , he knoweth , hath bowells of compassion , and will not alwaies bee ruled by rigour ; but finding contrition , will have a regard of weaknesse . And indeed , seeing the end of Gods chastening is but to piece up my breaches , why should hee strike so hard , to break mee in pieces .

But are there not some men , that feign themto be selves poore , when yet they be rich , because they would pay but a little tribute ? And may not David be such a one , feign himselfe to bee weake , when perhaps hee was strong , because hee would have God to spare him in his chastening ? But never have such a thought of David : for heare him what hee sayes farther : Heale mee , for my bones are troubled , and surely , if his bones bee troubled , hee may well bee allowed to say hee is weake . For if there be any strength in our bodies , it is in our bones : they are both ablest to withstand harme , and farthest removed out of harmes way ; that before any trouble can come to them , it must passe the skinne , the flesh , the membranes , and all other parts , that if once the bones come to bee troubled , wee may justly say , Res rediit ad Triarios , the matter is come to the height of extremity : And therefore , David finding trouble in his bones , had just cause to complaine of weaknesse , and to say ; Heale mee , O God , for my bones are troubled . Distempers and infirmities are ever more hard , or easie to be cured , as they are seated in parts , more hard or easie to be wrought upon : and therefore distempers in the spirits , are of al other the easiest to be cured , more hard in the humours , but in the solid parts hardest of all , for then they grow to bee Hectick ; and such , in all account , are scarse held curable : and seeing of all the solid parts the bones are the most solid , and therefore diseases in them the hardest to be cured ; David had just cause to call to God for helpe , and to say ; Heale mee , O God , for my bones are troubled . If the beames of a house bee unsound and shaken , how is it possible the house should stand , and as little is it possible , that this body of mine should bee saved from ruine : if my bones which are the beams of it , be out of order , and troubled .

But if the trouble of the bones be so incurable , is it not presumption in David to say ; Heale me , O God , for my bones are troubled : being as if he should say , cure me , O God , for I am past all cure , and so tempt God , with desiring him to do a worke that is impossible ? But is it not , that David knowes to whom hee speakes ? hee knowes hee speaks not to Galen , or to Hippocrates , hee knowes hee speakes not to Aesculapius , or to Apollo , but hee speakes to him that is a transcendent to all these : One to whom , not only nothing is impossible , but to whom all impossible things are nothing . It were indeed an unreasonable request in the eye of Nature , but very unreasonable in the eye of Faith : seeing Faith indeed is then most reasonable , when most it is above all reason ; which therefore-made Abraham , the Father of the faithfull , because contrary to hope , hee believed in hope , that God would make him such a father . And indeed most properly then it growes to bee a cure for God , when in mans judgement it is growne incurable : as Christ would not go to heale Lazarus untill hee was dead , and had beene foure daies buried , thereby perhaps to prepare beliefe for his owne resurrection : seeing it might well bee believed hee could rise himselfe the third day , who had raised another after foure daies . Never therefore fear , my soule , to say with David , Heale me , for my bones are troubled : for the time will come , when hee shall heale thee , not onely when thy bones bee troubled , but when they bee mouldred away into dust and powder : for even then hee will gather them together againe , and make them stand up , and serve for beams to this bodie of thine , as now they doe .

But how can the bones bee troubled , seeing they have no sense ? for it is the flesh and the membranes that feele the pain , the bones feele none . Oh then consider how great my trouble is , which strikes a sense of paine into my very parts that are not sensible .

And now , it would bee comfort indeed to have my bones healed , if when they were healed , I might then bee at quiet ; but alas , what comfort is it now to bee healed of their trouble , when Gods chastening hand pursues me still , and layes more , and greater troubles upon mee continually ? for though the trouble of the bones bee the height of trouble ; yet it is but the trouble of the bodie ; my soule all this while hath beene at quiet , Verse 3 but now my soule it selfe is troubled also , and so extremly troubled , that I feele it , and feele it sensibly , in all the parts of my soule ; I feele it in my memory , when I remember the grievous sins I have committed : I feele it in my understanding , when I consider thy glorious Majesty , whom I have offended : I feele it in my will , when I thinke upon the terrour of thy displeasure which I have incurred . If the trouble were but in this or that part onely : I might yet finde comfort in the other : but now that every part of my soule , now that all my whole soule is troubled , and extremly troubled ; Alas , now I may truly say , was ever sorrow , like my sorrow , was ever trouble like this of mine ?

But can the soule bee troubled ? is it not a spirituall substance ? and are not all earthly things too grosse , to trouble that which is a spirit ? They should bee so indeed , and they would be so indeed , if the soule had her right . But alas , while wee live here , the soule is but an Inmate to the bodie , and therefore the body crowes over it , as being upon its own dunghill , and makes us all of kinne to Martha , troubled about many things , when but one is needfull . And yet these be not the things that trouble the noble soule , not the soule of David . In matters indeed between the World and us , the soule is forced to looke downe upon the earth , as upon that which sustaines it , and if it finde a want there , it findes withall a trouble indeed ; but a trouble to the body onely : or if to the soule , but in the bodies behalfe , which is not much : That which properly troubles the soule , is the proper trouble of the soule , and is onely in matters betweene God and us : and in matters of this nature , it lookes up to heaven , for there indeed is the soules freehold : and if that inheritance bee once questioned , then the soule findes it selfe in trouble presently , and so extremely troubled : that where the trouble of the body , is but the bodie of trouble , this trouble of the soule is , I may say , the soule of trouble : and is not this inheritance questioned , if God fall once to rebuke mee in his anger ? For seeing the inheritance is but a meere gift proceeding from his favour ; how can I expect it , if I be in his displeasure ? When I was in my greatest weaknesse , yet my bones afforded mee at least some strength ; and when my bones were troubled , yet my soule was able to take care of their curing : but now that my soule it selfe is troubled : Alas , O God , who is there but thy selfe onely , of whom I can hope for any comfort ? and therefore , O Lord , How long ? How long wilt thou let me lye languishing in my weaknesse ? How long wilt thou suffer me to struggle with oppression ? How long wilt thou see the extremity of my misery , and not relieve mee ? Thou indeed inhabitest Eternity , and no time to thee is either short , or long : but I alas , am a subject of times , and nothing so much tyrannizeth over me , as this tyrant time ; and specially when it joynes with misery : for then , as a thousand yeares are with thee but as a day , so a day with mee is as a thousand yeares : Measure me not therefore by thy standard of Eternity , but measure mee by the standard of time : And then O Lord , How long ? How long shall thy chastening hand lye heavie upon mee ? How long wilt thou poure upon mee the vialls of thine indignation ? How long shall my soule bee kept from her true inheritance , which is , to beare a part in the consort of Angels ? My soule is a free spirit , and is with nothing so much delighted , as with liberty ; with nothing so much vexed , as with thraldome : and in thraldome alas , in miserable thraldome , is my soule detained : and therefore , O Lord , How long ? How long shall my soule bee restrained of her liberty ? How long shall I lye groaning in the dungeon of captivity ? How long shall no date bee set , to give a period to my thraldome ? My soule , I may say , is all heart , and therefore every trouble it feeles , must needs go to the heart , yet none so deepe as this , that I am forced to cry to thee out of the deepe , and cannot yet ascend out of this vale of misery : And therefore , O Lord , how long ? How long shall I live in the death of this feare , the feare of death ? How long shall I desire to bee dissolved , that being reunited againe , I may never more be dissolved ? How long shall my immortall soule bee kept from the possession of her immortality , from the immortality of her possession ? If the Saints in heaven , who now tread time under their feet , doe yet continue this question still , to ask How long ? How long , O Lord , holy , and true , wilt thou not avenge our blood on them that live in the earth ; Is it mervaile , that I who live under the tyrannie of time , should beginne this question , to aske how long ? How long , O Lord , mercifull , and just , wilt thou not avenge me on the world , and sathan , for the wrongs they have done mee ? How long shall I bee kept from saying , O Death , where is thy sting , O grave , where is thy victorie ? How long shall the Angell with the flaming sword , keepe mee from entring againe into Paradise ? Where is the morning of joy I promised to my selfe , when I said , sorrow may bee in the evening , but joy commeth in the morning ? For how many evenings , how many tedious nights of sorrow have I endured , and yet can see no morning of joy , no dawning of morning toward ? Where is the truth of that Aphorisme ; Dolor si gravis , Brevis , for what dolour so grievous as this of my soule , and yet O Lord , how long ? How long shall I stand complaining , and say : my soule is troubled ? Is it not , that I shall never cease to say , my soule is troubled , till he return again , who once said for me , that his soule was troubled : For alas , his soule should never have beene troubled , but to take away , amongst others , the trouble of mine : seeing hee is the sacrifice for all our sinnes , and with his stripes we are healed . And now therefore , O Lord , how long ? How long wilt thou turne away thy face , and not shew me again the light of thy countenance ? How long wilt thou absent thy self from me , and not afford me the joy of thy presence ? How long wilt thou bee going still farther from mee , and not so much as once offer to returne ? Verse 4 Oh returne at last and deliver my soule , save mee for thy mercies sake ; for alas , O Lord , all my troubles are come upon mee , because thou wentst from mee ; all my grievance is long of thine absence : for as long as thou wert with mee , and that I had thy presence , my soule was at quiet , my bones were at rest ; and I enjoyed then a sweete and pleasing calme over all my parts : but as soone as thou departedst from mee , and didst but turn away thy face ; my calme was presently turned into a tempest , a violent tempest of thunder and lightening : Thunder of thy rebuking , and lightening of thine anger : that if thou stay not thy hand from chastening , and return the sooner , I shall never bee able to hold out living , to taste of thy mercie . Saint Peter was never so neere drowning , when hee cried out to Christ , Lord save mee , or else I perish : as David is now neere sinking in the pit of perdition , if God returne not speedily , and deliver his soule . But what speake I of David , as though it were not my owne case ? and if my danger bee as great , shall not my prayer be as earnest ? or can I finde a better way of saving , then thy returning ? No , O Lord ; for if thou returne , I am sure thou wilt not , I know thou canst not leave thy mercy behind : and mercie when it comes , I know it cannot , I am sure it will not ever suffer it to bee perdition : For though my soul were at the pits brink , and readie to fall in , yet even then would mercie put forth her hand and save mee .

Thou requirest mee to returne to thee ; and alas , O Lord , how can I , if thou returne not to mee first ? can I come to thee , unlesse thou draw mee ? and canst thou draw mee to thee , if thou withdraw thy selfe from mee ? I know thou returnest continually , to dispose and order the Oeconomie of thy creatures : but this returning is in thy providence , and is not that which I desire : I know thou returnest often to visit and judge the sinnes of the world , as thou didst at Sodome : but this returning is in thy justice , and therefore , neither is this returning for my turn ; but thou hast a returning , in Grace and favour , when thou returnest to mee , to make mee returne to thee , a returning from thine anger to thy patience , from thine indignation to thy loving kindnesse : and this is the returning which I so earnestly desire and sue for .

But O my soule , before God returne in this manner to thee , thou must looke to heare him expostulate with thee in this manner : Alas my Creature , what hast thou done , to bring these troubles upon thy selfe ? Did I not make thee at first a sound bodie , and did I not give it a strong constitution ? and how happens it now that thy bones should bee troubled ? Did I not breathe into it a perfect soule , and gave it endowments , after mine owne image ? and how comes it now to bee so quite out of order , and so cleane bereft of all my graces ? Thou wilt perhaps answer ; It is true O Lord , my bones are troubled : and how can they chuse , seeing thou tookest one of them away from mee , which thou gavest mee at first ? My soule also is troubled : and how can it chuse , seeing thou didst suffer the Serpent in Paradise to disturb and trouble it ? But may not God then justly reply , I took one of thy bones from thee indeed , but it was to make thee an helper : I let in the Serpent into Paradise indeed , but it was to try thee , for thy better perfecting ; and when I saw thee so foolishly hurt thy selfe with thy helper , and so easily wonne from mee by a Tempter ; had I not just cause to leave thee to them , for whom thou leftest me ? and now forlorne wretch , what hast thou to say , unlesse thou have leave to say ; Return , O Lord , and deliver my soule , save mee for thy mercies sake .

But what more necessity is there of Gods returning to deliver his soule , then there was before to heale his bones ? and in that case he spake not a word of returning : and why should hee more importune it now ? Is it not , that many diseases may be well enough cured , onely by relation of symptomes , though the Physitian come not where the patient is : and of this sort it seemes was the healing of his bones : but to deliver his soule , is of another nature , and requires perhaps a feeling the pulse , perhaps , an inspection of the patient : and therefore no remedie , here but the Physition must himselfe bee present .

But is it enough to make suite to God in generall terms , to pray him to deliver my soule , and not tell from what it is , hee must deliver it ? Can any man thinke that God will returne upon so uncertaine an occasion ? Alas , O Lord , it is not unknown to thee , that my soule wants no clothes : and therefore , it is not to deliver it from nakednesse : my soule needs no meat , and therefore it is not to deliver it from hunger : my soule is never old , and therefore it is not to deliver it from the wrackes of time ; but it is indeed to deliver it from trouble : and what it is that can trouble my soule , thou knowest : for my soule is thy servant , depending wholy upon thy favour , and having offended thee , desires to bee delivered from all feare of thine anger : My soule was at first a free spirit , but is now become a bondslave to sinne , and therfore desires to bee delivered from this bondage : My soule is it selfe immortall , but is troubled here with a mortall body , and therefore desires to bee delivered from this bodie of death : and in effect it is all but sinne , and the traine that sinne drawes after it , from which I desire my soule should bee delivered . And therefore returne , O Lord , and deliver my soule , save mee for thy mercies sake .

But O my soule , with what reason canst thou expect that God should ever returne to thee ? for who would bee willing to come to one in trouble , as thou art , lest hee pay for his comming , with drawing a trouble upon himselfe ? and if hee should returne and come unto thee , wouldst thou bee so satisfied ? wouldst thou not presently bee importuning him for further favours ? Hee must helpe thee in thy troubles ; He must helpe thee out of thy troubles , or thou wouldst never bee at quiet . And is it a small matter to deliver a soule out of trouble ? Do soules use to bee troubled for trifles ? and were he not better then to endure thy importunity for his returning , then being returned , to bee troubled with importunitie for thy deliverance ? But O my soule , be not frighted with these vaine objections : for , is God like man , that hee should bee afraid of being troubled ? Is he not the God of mercy ; and can it bee a trouble to his mercie , to doe the workes of mercie ? Is it not his delight to bee ; Is it not his title to bee called ; Is not his glory to bee counted a deliverer ? and is any deliverance so fit for his mercie , so worthy of his mercie , as deliverance of soules ? Alas , O Lord , it is a small worke for thee to return ; but thou shalt doe an infinite worke by thy returning : for thou shalt deliver my soule out of trouble , my grieved soule out of grievous troubles ; and wilt thou not afford me so much kindnesse , to doe so small a matter , for effecting of so great a matter ? Oh returne , O God , and deliver my soule , that as thou art called a deliverer , so I may call thee my deliverer , and may sing with Moses : Thou , O God , art my strength , and my song , for thou hast been my deliverance .