The apology of Theophilus Higgons lately minister, now Catholique VVherein the letter of Sir Edvv. Hoby Knight, directed vnto the sayd T.H. in answere of his first motiue, is modestly examined, and clearely refuted.

THE FIRST PART ; Concerning the MORALL points , obiected vnto me by SIR EDW. in his FIRST PARAGRAPH .

CHAPTER I. Of my Puritanisme , and causes of my Alienation ; pretended by the Knight .

§. 1. Of my Puritanisme .

1. PHILOSOPHY doth teach , and experience doth prooue , that , amongst other conditions of Sight , there is required a conuenient distance betwixt the Organ of seeing , and the Object to be seene : not too farr ; because the power of the sight is limited , and confined vnto a certayn space : not too neere ; because the species ( the formes , or shapes ) of the Obiect must haue sufficient ayre , as the meane , to deriue , and conuaigh them vnto the Organ . That is to say ( in a more familiar kind of speach , for the capacity of euery Reader ) We can not discerne a thing , which is too remote from the eye , or placed * * Sensibile positum supra sensum , toli●… sensationem . immediately vpon the same .

2. This obseruation may be very beneficiall vnto Sir Edward ; who ( being no a a 1. Sam. 9.9 SEER by inspiration ) hath been very much deceiued in his sight ; not onely betwixt b b Where he dateth his Letter to me . Queenburrow , and S. Omers , where the distance was too great , but also betwixt the c c Were he dateth his Letter to the Ladies . BLACK FRYARS , and Fleetstreet , where the distance was too little for him , to perceiue the truth of those things , which he imputeth vnto my charge . And therefore , if I , or any other , would demand ; Why Sir Edward , liuing in the circuite of the Black Friars ( that is to say , in the middest of a zealous , and religious Congregation ) should vntruly accuse me of Puritanisme in Fleetstreet ? the resolution may be this ; The places were so neere , that he could not see the truth .

3. But I will not separate those things , which he hath joyned together . Behold then ( good Reader ) the whole connexion of his discourse ; for I will not be an vnkind Atropos to cutt the thred in sunder , before it be spunne out vnto the farthest length .

4. d d Pag. 12. That famous Colledge of Christs Church in Oxford ( which you haue ill repayed for the sweet milk , which you haue sucked out of hir breasts ) hath not yet forgotten how you were euer stayned with Puritanisme ; how violently aduerse you were to all such , as were suspected to fauour the Romish Sea . She doth yet smile to think , what payn you took , being Censour of the house , in putting your and to the sawing downe of a poore , harmelesse May-pole , because you thought it came out of a Romish forrest . When you were Lecturer at * * Fleetsir . S. Dunstanes , your contributory Auditours thought your long prayer , and spitting pawses too short , because the reuerend Bishopps ( yea euen your owne Lord , and Maister ) were euer left out for wranglers , and Antichristian Hierarchies , not worthy to be named , in the same day , with your holy Pastours , and sanctified Ministers . Thus haue you euer affected singularity . But how commeth it to passe , that you should now fall into the opposite contrariety ? &c. So he .

5. Here Puritanisme is made the Aries to ruinate the walls of my credit ; and , being an eminent vntruth , is placed in the very front , and forlorne-hope , of his future assault ; that so my chandge might seeme either impossible , or absurd , where the termini are so distant , and , consequently , the motion must be long : howbeit the proportion is not iust herein , betwixt corporall , and spirituall things .

6. But , to deale orderly without confusion , and plainely without obscurity , in the roote of this accusation , vpon which the branches of the rest depend ; I will first consider the point it self , or crime of Puritanisme , obiected vnto me by the Knight : secondly I will reuiew the proofes , which he alleadgeth to justify the same .

7. FIRST then for this PVRITANISME ; I will readily confesse , with Sir Edward , that it is a stayne : but I constantly deny , that it was , or could be so , vnto me , who embraced PROTESTANTINISME ( as , in our contrey , it distinguisheth from the note of a Papist , & a Puritan ) and esteemed it to be more probable in reason , as I saw it to be more conformable vnto the State .

8. Of which my vnderstanding , and affection in theis affayres , as my conscience is my best witnesse , so I want not sondry ouertures to declare the same , if my publick association , if my priuate conference , if Lectures , if Sermons , if , finally , any outward act may testify my inward thoughts , wherein Sir Edward hath no interest to be my Iudge .

9. If I must yet make a more particular appeale , it shall be vnto my Reuerend Lord , the L. Bishopp of London himself ; for , as he knew me better then this Knight , so he knew likewise , that a stayned Puritan was vnfitt either to receiue his fauours , or to do him Seruice ; wherein sondry occasions presented themselues vnto me , to encounter PVRITANS ; and yet they can not ( or , if they can , let them ) say , that openly , or secretely , in whole , or in part , in doctrine , discipline , or ceremony , I was inclinable vnto their side .

10. Wherefore , to come , SECONDLY , vnto Sir Edward his proofes of this pretended stayne ( for , if it be sufficient for him to accuse , I shall not be innocent ) I confesse the Fact it self in his first proof , but I deny it in the second .

11. First then ( Sir Edward ) vnto your first ; I confesse the fact , which you alleadge , I deny the cause , which you assigne . For the originall , and proper motiue of my disconceipt against that harmelesse Maypole ( whereof I was the Aduersary , & you are the Aduocate ) was , because it came out of the Colledge grounds ; taken thence by stealth , and erected ( with scorne ) neere vnto our walls , without our consent ; and this also to justify a former wrong , lately offered in the same kind . This was the cause ( as many can yet remember ) first moouing me vnto that enterprise ; which , though it were not expedient for me then to vndertake , yet ( being a wooden proof in your behalf ) it was not conuenient for you to mention at this time .

12. As for your second proof ; it is more important , and materiall . And now I am glad to see your writt of remoouall , whereby you bring my cause from Oxford , to receiue a triall at London . For as this injury is more marqueable , so is my defence more ample in this case .

13. Wherefore I appeale vnto you , Honourable , Rightworshipfull , and other , well respected , Auditours ( from whom as I haue had many , and singular tokens of your loue , so I recognize it heere , with my best thanks ) whether you , in your election of me vnto the office of your PREACHER , or whether I , from the first vnto the last performance of that duty , gaue any signification of theis things , whereof I am now accused ?

14. But if in the manner , and matter of my Sermons ; if in the composition , and style , and other appurtenances of speach , I euer expressed a contrary affection vnto that , which is heere imposed vpon me ; if vsually , in my ordinary Lectures ( and , alwayes , in a more solemne assembly ) I made a generall remembrance of the Bishopps , and a speciall of my Lord , and Maister ; if I were different in habit , and deportment from the singularity of stayned Puritans ; lastly , if I shewed a totall conformity in regular demeanure , why should this whole fable , compounded of so many vntrue circumstances , be so improbably suggested against me by the Knight ? Surely this benefitt ensueth vnto me by such a wrong , that Fame deserueth little creditt in things more secrete , and obscure , since it is controlled in things so manifest , and cleare .

15. I might also heere produce , for more abundant refutation of this pretended stayn , a certayn prouerbiall report ( intertayned by my good friends ) of the opposite contrariety ; viz. If any man will heare a Popish Sermon , let him go to S. Dunstanes . I might acquaynt you with many positions , deliuered by me there , in frequent auditoryes , which are Hereticall in GENEVA , but Catholique in ROME . I might appeale vnto persons of different quality ; Clericall , Laicall ; learred , vnlearned ; noble , base ; &c. who accused me in the later , but euer freed me in the former respect . And , if farther occasion shall be ministred vnto me , I may ( perhapps ) deale more punctually therein .

16. Meane while , thus much shall suffise concerning this Puritanicall stayn ; which , though it doth more properly belong vnto things INTELLECTVALL , then MORALL , yet since it is here taken by Sir Edward into his sifting Paragraph , with reference vnto the sequele ( wherein he seuerely examineth the causes of my Alienation ) I could not pretermitt it in this place .

§. 2. Of the causes of my Alienation ; and particularly of Debts .

1. BVt how commeth it to passe ( saith Sir Edward ) that you should now fall into the opposite " contrariety ? His answere is . e e pag. 14. &c Happily you haue done this either wholly to escape , or to agree the better with your CREDITOVRS . Happily , hauing missed a former PREFERMENT , you think , by this meanes , to be wooed by the State to returne . Happily the yoke of WEDLOCK , being somewhat burthensome to your shoulders , was an inducement to make you cast off the plough . And is it , but happily , so ? Behold his gradation . SVRELY , not onely some , but euen all of theis , were the cords , that haled on your FIRST MOTIVE .

2. But hold your hand , good Sir , a while ; you must not object , and answere also ; and it becommeth me now to interpose my self , least your answere heere , might be more prejudiciall vnto me , then your objection * * §. 1. num. 4. & 12. before . Wherefore I will intreate particularly of your three assigned causes of my Alienation , and first concerning the matter of Debts ; which ( as you f f Ibid. say ) the world knoweth were very clamours : agayn ; g g pag. 19. It was the grimme aspect of your owne estate , &c.

3. As for your amplifications ( the world knoweth : clamorous : grimme aspect ) they may be signes of your * * Rhetori concessum est sententijs vti falsis , &c. Gell. l. 1. c. 6. rhetoricall veyne ; and so , letting them passe , I come vnto the matter of your accusation , which will easily vanish into smoke , and returne into that Nothing , out of which it was taken , and made , if you will vouchsafe to consider with me , First , the quantity of theis debts ; Secondly , the reason of the same ; Thirdly , my meanes of dischardge ; Fourthly , the disposition , and quality of my Creditours ; Fiftly , and lastly , my honest intention to repay . Thus I doubt not , but Sir Edward shall receiue a just satisfaction ; whereby also I shall stoppe the wide mouth of his world .

4. Concerning the FIRST ; it may be , that Fame hath putt my debts to vsury , and made the increase greater then the principall ; which , by many pounds , extendeth not vnto one hundred marks .

5. Concerning the SECOND ; it may please Sir Edward to vnderstand , that my debts ( whatsoeuer ) arose not vpon any vitious course of life , but vpon other respects , incident vnto Schollers , and such , especially , whom either continuall attendance about their Lords , or euident hope of better fortunes , inuiteth vnto a more liberall expense .

6. Concerning the THIRD therefore ; Sir Edwards world may beare witnesse for me , that though my desert ( hauing no value in it self ) could be of no more value , then it was made by the loue , and kindnesse of others ; yet , as my possibility , and probability of immediate preferment were very great ) in that respect ) so they , whose fauour nourished my hopes in a comfortable expectation ( beyond many of my rank ) would not suffer me to fall vnder a burthen of so little waight .

7. Concerning the FOVRTH then ; if my Creditours had bene as violent , as that h h Matth. 18.27.28 . vngratefull seruant , who , forgetting his Maisters patience toward himself ; shewed impatience against his owne fellow ; yet were they so vnwise also , that they would destroy the fortunes , which should be common vnto vs both ? No ; that , which they lent to buyld me vp , they demanded not to pull me downe , but expected my haruest , wherein they might reape their owne agayn ; if with aduantage , it depended vpon my will , which ( being not like the barren ground , wherein the seed is lost , but like the fertile , which yealdeth it agayn with profit ) hath euer been more apt to recompence a benefitt , then to retayn a due .

8. Wherefore , for the FIFT point ( which , in consequence , doth chiefly import me ) I am desirous to satisfy Sir Edward , and his world , therein , in all syncerity of heart . But because i i Pro. the heart of man is deepe , and is knowen onely ( infallibly ) vnto him , k k Psal. 139. who walketh in all our secrete paths ( or vnto none , farther then he will communicate the same ) I appeale first , and principally , vnto my great , and souereigne Iudge , by whom , and before whom , I must , and may justify my honest intention in this behalf . If I am guilty , he is the Accuser that shall be the Witnesse , and he is the witnesse that shall be the Iudge , and he is the judge that shall condemne me , and from his sentence there lieth no appeale . Here then is my confidence , and comfort .

9. Howbeit , since Charity will think the best in all things , and of all men ( for l l 1. Cor. 13.5 she thinketh not euill ) and , specially , when she hath probable inducements thereunto ; I am glad that they ( Men ) who ( alone ) can accuse me vnjustly , may ( and ought ) justly excuse me also . For , as at sondry times before , and vnto sondry persons , I did fully , and thankfully repay my debts , so , vpon my departure out of England , I gaue some tokens of my morall inclination in this kind .

10. I will not ( though I might ) go vnto Oxford for my proof , but vnto London , whither I was cited * * §. 1. Num. 4. & 12. before , for a triall in the first , and fundamentall objection , contriued by Sir Edwards skill . And now , because he shall not farther call into question , nor disprooue , my fidelity , and truth ; I am compelled to name some men ( the first being one of my best , the other none of my worst friends ) viz † † In Chancery lane . M. Garth , * * Ibid. M. Simcotts , † † Neere Charing crosse . M. Councell : to whom ( conjunctiuely ) I dischardged the summe of eight pounds , or more ; when no necessity ( but honesty ) did force me thereunto . Whence Sir Edward ( out of his m m pag. 4. Protestant Charity ) may reasonably collect , and credibly affirme , that , in borrowing , I had no purpose to deceiue .

11. And heere , though it may seeme repugnant vnto the duty , and affection of a Sonne , to detract any estimation from his Fathers report , yet since his * * Annexed vnto Sir Edwards . Letter is published to giue more creditt , and authority vnto Sir Edwards calumniations , yea to satisfy any vnprejudicate Reader ( for so the † † In his Admonit. Printer testifieth in his name ) and lastly , since heere the matter it self doth ineuitably challendge it at my hands ( for though there are other vntrue points contayned in that Letter , either as much , or more prejudiciall vnto me then this , yet I will seek no occasion to contradict any parcell thereof , otherwise then it shall present it self vnto me ; nor yet will I accept it farther , then pure necessity shall constrayne me ) I must remooue a scandall , which , by virtue of the sayd Letter , may ( perhappes ) make a deepe impression in some mens hearts , to my singular inconuenience , and losse .

12. Whereas therefore , you ( my deare , and louing Father ) giue this signification in your Letter ( bearing the forme of an indictment against me , your Sonne ) viz. before he went beyond the Seas , he borrowed diuers summes of money , with purpose ( I am perswaded ) neuer to repay them , and , amongst the rest , he abused my self for ten pound ; the former instances ( besides many other proofes ) may perswade you otherwise , and assure you of that , which a Father doth least suspect , or least accuse ; to witt , the Morall honesly of your Sonne : which , by the course of nature , hath , from you , descended vnto me , as my best inheritance . And that it may appeare vnto your self , and others ( who , either by your owne consent , or by Sir Edwards fault , haue interest in theis accusations , to require my defence ) that I did not abuse your Fatherly benignity ( which emptied your meanes to fill my wants , as freely , as n n S. Aug. Conf. l. 2. c. 3. Patricius himself dealt with his Augustine ) I pray you to remember that , which you did ( or might ) know long before : to witt , that I borrowed , and receiued the sayd ten pounds of you , to further my suite in obtayning a * * S. Michaels in Gloucester . Benefice , being in his Majesties gift , and vacant vpon the depriuation of the late Incumbent ( stayned with Puritanisme ) and that I was expressly counsayled thereunto by my Honorable Lord ; howbeit , vpon some difficulties , I surceased from the same .

13. This was the occasion of borrowing that summe . But now , if you will compare the time also , when I borrowed it , with the time of my departure out of England , I may be fully cleared from all suspition of abuse . For my departure , out of England , being in Nouember 1607. and the receipt of that money , about Easter 1606. the distance of the times doth prooue , that my intention was not fraudulent ; since at Easter 1606. I thought not of this departure in Nouember 1607 ; which was ( almost ) two yeares after .

14. So then it is true , that I borrowed sundry summes , in generall , and this , in particular also , before I went beyond the Seas : but this word ( BEFORE ) is heere ambiguous ( and , in one sense , very prejudiciall ) and therefore must be distinguished : viz. Mediately , or Immediately before . If it be taken mediately , as it signifieth a good distance of time , I confesse the accusation , in this sense , to be very true ; but then my honest intention receiueth little , or no prejudice thereby . If it be taken immediately , as it signifieth a propinquity , and neerenesse of time ; I must deny the accusation , in this sense , to be true ; and this , onely , is it , which can be prejudiciall vnto the honesty of my intention . To conclude then ; I say , and , vpon my saluation , I protest vnto you , that neither immediately , nor neere vpon my departure , nor after my first resolution that way , did I borrow any money , but I did repay some ; and so , in each respect ( both of not borrowing , and of repaying ) I am freed from the infamy of this pretended abuse ; forasmuch as I might then haue borrowed more , and I might not haue repayed any : both which had been to my great aduantadge , when money was to be my best ( if not my onely ) friend .

15. Now , if my true defence were not thus plainely , and articulately set downe , who would not conceiue the meaning to be this ? viz. Immediately before , or vpon his departure , he borrowed diuers summes of money , &c. For , by the contempering , and mingling together of theis words , borrow ; abuse ; neuer repay ; going beyond the seas ; this sense must necessarily flow , & issue thereout : and this , I know , is the construction , which is made by many , and specially by them , whose will doth make them more credulous in this case . o o Caesar in commentar. Et Lamprid. in Heliogab . Quod volumus , facilè credimus .

16. But there is more art , then charity in theis commixtions ; which are as preiudiciall vnto those , whom we are willing to defame , as the conjunction of Saturne with a more benigne , & happy starr , is fatall vnto the bodies in our inferiour world . As for example . CLEMENT the eight ( of blessed life , and happy memory ) is accused by p p de Antichr . M. Gabriel Powell , of whoredome . When ? Ante Papatum ( sayth he ) before his Popedome . Who is the witnesse ? Doctour Gentilis ; his professed enemy . Well ; be it so : it was in his yong * * of 16 years . age ( as D. Gentilis related it vnto me ) wherein , and q q Confess . l. 6 cap. 15. after which , Augustine himself confesseth , and lamenteth his greater follies . But yet ; why ante Papatum ? Why should his Papacy ( or the Papacy rather ) in his declining age , beare the fault of his youthfull yeares ? This was an euill commixtion also , & , for the manner , it hath a singular resemblance with the other , whereof I haue already treated , and wherewith I will conclude this matter .

17. Finally therefore ; as my Religion , and disposition do powerfully incline me to GIVE euery man his owne ( which is the proper act of Iustice , but not of Charity ; which doth FORGIVE euery man his debts ; and for this cause , though I will pay others , yet I will spare Sir Edward ) so I will endeauour , to my power , to giue a iust satisfaction vnto my Creditours , whether * * See before ; num. 2. 3. clamorous , or silent . Vnto the first ( if there be any such ) I would owe nothing but loue : vnto the second , I owe more loue then before . I know the precept , which S. Paul r r Rom. 13.8 . giueth , viz. Owe nothing vnto any man , but this , that you loue one an other . I know that it is a mark , which Dauid s s Psal. 36.21 setteth vpon the vngodly man ; he borroweth , and payeth not agayn . My desire to obserue that precept , and to avoyd this mark , shall expresse it self in my carefull , and industrious prouision for that little quantity of debt , which Sir Edward esteemeth to be a great cause of my Alienation from his Church . But whether there be any porportion betwixt the cause , and the effect , I will now remitt my self , & him , vnto the decision of the impartiall Reader .

§. 3. Want of Preferment .

1. I come now vnto the second Cause , which is like vnto the first ; as , amongst * * Facies non omnibus vna est , Nec diuersa tamen , &c. Ouid. Sisters , the one is the half image of the other . The Misse of your preferment was grieuous vnto you , saith t t pag. 15. Sir Edward : and ; u u pag. 14. hauing missed a former preferment , you think , by this meanes , that the State will wooe you to returne .

2. In which accusation he is so confident , that , diuiding the affection of Aërius vnto me , & reseruing the opinion of that heretick vnto w w pag. 56. himself , he x x pag. 20. challengeth me , as a man infected with the disease of Aërius : and ; y y pag. 10. this was the disease of Aërius ; and , z z pag. 11. when I speake of Aërius , I think of M. * * An hater of God . Theomisus . Which name Sir Edward giueth me in his new baptisme : and I am no more vnfortunate therein , then S. Innocentius , whom the Magdeburgians haue bated the first syllable of his name ; or S. Athanasius , to whom the Trinitarian hereticks haue added one letter ; or S. Cyprian , with whom a Pagan Philosopher exchandged an other ; making them appeare as † † Nocentius . Sathanasius . Caprianus . monsters , who were the lights of the world .

3. But digesting this wrong ( as also many other ; viz. ❀ ❀ pag. 1. Fantasticall witt , a a 10. frantick fitts , b b 50. rayling Rabshekah ; c c 6. monstrous birth , &c. and sparing the Authour , who accuseth d d 49. my currish pen , I proceed vnto the matter it self .

4. And heere , if Sir Edwards former objection ( of Puritanisme ) had stood in force against me ; it had not bene so much a mutation , as a progression , and perfection in that ghospell , to runne , from it , into Brownisne , or Barrowisme , and , from thence , into Anabaptisme ; which , in the strict letter , sensed by inward Spiritt ( according to the ancient rules of Protestant Religion also ) is the neatest , and most refined ghospell of them , who fell away from * * The Sacramentaries , and Anabaptists fell from vs &c. Luth. in Gal. 5.9 . LVTHER , the c c Powel de Antichr . pag. 324. great Reformer of the Church . And surely , if the chandge of my Religion had depended vpon such a temporall respect , as Sir Edward doth suggest , thoses courses had sorted as fully for my commodity , and more neerely with my conscience , then this opposite contrariety , which I now embrace .

5. But I plead no such defence . It was the light of truth , that conuinced me ; the power of grace , that perswaded me ; no corrupt affection , but euident reason , no want in earth , but desire of heauen , no discontentment , which I found , but comfort , which I sought , did bring me , effectually , vnto this happy chandge .

6. Which motion of my Soule , if it came from the earth , and had the same beginning with this corruptible Body ; my choyce were improuident to forsake my former , and to intertayn this present course . Could I not perceiue , that , by flying , I did not fly , but increase my euill ? Did I not know , that this was no salue for such a sore , but a remedy worse then the sicknesse it self , if either I wanted , or sought for temporall meanes ? Did I not foresee , that I should now exclude my self from such competent meanes , as I had , and better fortunes , which I expected ; and that , withall , I should expose my name vnto certayn obloquy , and my life vnto vncertayn danger ?

7. Oh , sayth the Knight , but you thought , that the Sate would wooe you to returne . No , not so : for am I not as a droppe of water in that great Element ? But yet , you ( Sir Edward ) a member of f f pag. 4. the most superlatiue Parliament , do you not ( in charity ) perswade my returne , and do you not frame sondry g g pag. 94. Motiues to this effect ?

8. Your h h pag. 4. &c. former lines were written in bloud ( as the lawes of Draco ) your later in milk ; wherein I am restored agayn vnto my i i pag. 93. name ( Theophilus ) and ( almost ) vnto your fauour ; so that you , my Aduersary-Friend , might justly haue a second right in me ( the first being alwayes reserued vnto my Honorable Lord ) to vse , dispose , and employ me according to your will , if my conscience did not retayn me in this Faith , with an inuiolable bond .

9. As for other Motiues , more effectuall , and powerable , then flesh , and bloud can easily resist , I will say nothing at this time . I may not publish the fauours of other men so freely , as Sir Edward doth proclayme my faults . This onely may suffise to shew vnto men of charitable , and reasonable mindes , that I languished not with the disease of k k Epiph. haeres . 75. August . haeres. 53. AERIVS ( or l l See the Examen of Fox his Calend. Ianuar. 1. WICKLIFFE ) and delighted not my self in the singularity of opinion ( as they did ) but , for the truths sake , which conuinced me , for my soules sake , which lay in perill , for my Sauiours sake , who redeemed it with his bloud , I repayred vnto that m m Hieronym . ad Damas . Ark , out of which there is no safety in the waues of heresy , and schisme ; that so I might be knitt vnto that Church , whereof , n n In 1. Tim. 3.15 . S. Ambrose sayth , DAMASVS was Rectour in his time ; and PAVL is at this day : a Church one in faith , ancient in time , visible in succession , comely in order , conformable in actions ; * * It was S. Augustines obseruation in his time . she , that is in all places , and like hir self , wheresoeuer she is ; the roote , without which the branches shall wither ; the vnited body , out of which the diuided members shall perish , and decay .

§. 4. Of my Wife ; &c.

1. THe third Cause , which Sir Edward assigneth of my Alienation , is my Mariadge ; a yoke ( saith o o pag. 15. he ) to burthensome to your shoulders ; the mariadge-God , Himenaeus , was none of your best friends , &c. Concerning which subject , I might intertayn the Reader with a long discourse . But , cui bono ? as Cassius was wont to say : to what good , or for what end , and purpose ?

2. Seeing two sorts of people , generally , in the world ; Good , and Euill : Wise , and Foolish : Charitable , and Malitious ; I haue cast my reckoning thus : I shall not be condemned by the first , and , I care not to be accused by the second .

3. Howbeit , to satisfy the just expectation of some , & idle curiosity of others , in this matter ; I say , that I sought not my Wife in the beginning , but was sought by hir friends ; Gentlemen of quality , able , and willing to further me in the courses of this world , and specially in my late profession . I accepted their conditions , and liked hirs ; the promise was made , the knot was tied : yet so , that she was to remayn , wholly , vnder their prouision , vntill I should be actually possessed with all conuenient meanes : and then hir portion was to be in my hands , hir self in my care .

4. Now , if Sir Edward will presse me yet farther with that vnciuill demand of the p p A. Gellius lib. 5. cap. 20 Romane Censor ; Habésne vxorem ex animi tuisententiâ ? I might answere vnto him , as the party vnto the Censor : Habeo equidem vxorem , sed non herclé ex animi tui sententiâ . It was inough for him , and me , to make our choyce , to our owne contentment , in this case . If there were any other default , Sir Edward knoweth the wise , & necessary counsayle for me , and other husbands also : q q A. Gell. l. 1. c. 17. Vxoris vitium aut tollendum , aut ferendum : qui tollit , vxorem commodiorem praestat ; qui fert , sese meliorem facit .

5. But to deale with you , in good earnest ; Sir : do not think so vncharitably of me , that I wanted due affection vnto my spouse , or , that wanting due affection vnto hir , I would therefore renounce the Spouse of Christ ; as you pretend your Church to be , & inuest hir with that name . No ; there had been other alleuiations in this behalf , not so vnkind to hir , not so dishonest before men , not so impious in the sight of God . But , that I might embrace a comfortable vnion with the Spouse of Christ ( the Catholick , Romane , Apostolick Church ) I am therefore separated by place ( not loue ) from hir , betwixt whom , and me , there is a perfect neerenesse in this great distance . And though Sir Edwards pen hath made a * * See afterward . Chap. 2. §. 3. num. 22. 25. fowle blott to the prejudice of hir good affection towards me , yet I will belieue it to be a part of the common wrongs , which we sustayn from this vngentle Knight . And thus assuring both hir , and him , that I want not affection , but meanes to expresse it ( which I will endeauour to do , whether within , or without the Land ) I will conclude this matter , and , therewith , this chapter also .

6. Perhapps now , I may be condemned for writing too much , or too little in this kind ; howbeit , he , that ingageth me into the doubtfull censure of the Readers , hath made the same aduenture of his owne fortune . If we fare equally , I am eased by his company . If I fare worse , I haue patience to beare , and charity to forgiue . If better , he hath no reason to complayn .

CHAP. II. Of sondry other crimes , objected vnto me by Sir Edward , in his first ( sifting ) Paragraph .

§. 1. Of my disconceipt toward the Catholique , Romane faith , after my Alienation from the Church of England .

1. SIR ; the amplitude of your discourse exceedeth the commission of your title . For though your first Paragraph doth promise ( according to the inscription ) r r pag. 7. to fift the CAVSES of my Alienation ( which you haue raysed vnto THREE ) yet the greater part thereof spendeth it self in other pretended crimes ; viz. disconceipt toward my present Religion ; perjury in promises ; astorgy , and vnnaturall affection vnto my Father ; and such like : things without coherence in them selues , or reference vnto their title : & yet , Sir , you accuse the s s pag. 2. mishapen disproportion of my booke ; as though my conceipts had payned the womb of my braynes , and , striuing for birth , had broken from me rather by violence , then by order . Which accusation may ( perhapps ) belong rather vnto your self , whose zeale to do me wrong , distempered the method of your thoughts ; so that the things , which beganne to proceed from you at the first , retired themselues to yeald passadge vnto the rest : as t t Gen. 38.27 . Zara beganne first to come into the world , and yet withdrew himself , to giue place vnto the birth of Pharez .

2. But I passe by your method , and I come vnto your Matter ; wherein if you be found defectiue also , either by your owne inuention ( which is good ) or by others suggestion ( which I would rather belieue , in this case ) then your stayning calumniations must , in the end , returne , and ebb agayn vpon you ( or them ) from whom they flowed in the beginning . And now I will treate particularly of the pretended crimes ; which , being dispersed in your sifting Paragraph , shall be reduced heere , more exactly , vnto their seuerall heads .

3. The FIRST crimination therefore ( annexed vnto the former Causes ) toucheth my disconceipt toward the Romane , Catholick faith : as though my Alienation from you , were rather in action , then affection ; outward , them inward ; in mouth , then mynd : & this you prooue by a triple euidence , or reason . FIRST . I do easily belieue ( say u u pag. 16. you ) vpon his credible report , that at such time , as M. Etkins ( your old fellow Chaplayn , and friend ) * * at S. Omers . desired your company to Bruxells , or to England , you smote your hand vpon your breast , and , in great passion , vttered theis words ; O that I might safely returne , for that is my desire . Yea more ; you * * pag. 16. say , that , at his sight , I had Peters teares in my eyes , for the deniall of my Maister , &c.

4. As for the person relating , he doth me wrong , if you wrong not him in the relation it self . For I appeale vnto his conscience ( which representeth things past , in hir secrete , and inward reflex ) whether I gaue him the least signe , or suspition of inconstancy in this ( truly , and onely Catholick ) faith , or whether I expressed any , the least , affection toward that , which he now doth , and I did sometimes , professe . Doth he not remember , that my Father , treating with me to shew obedience , and humility in hearing the judgements of some principall Deuines in England , but finding no hope of my conformity , according to his desire , sayd thereupon ; What then should he do in England , if he be so obstinate ? Yea , doth he not remember his owne apology for me , in my Fathers presence ; In good faith I do belieue , that he is so perswaded in his heart ?

5. That he proposed vnto me a jorney for Bruxells , or England , or both , I deny not ; as also that I shewed an affection in me , loyall vnto my Prince , dutifull vnto my Contrey , louing vnto my Friends ( whom I was desirous to see ) but yet without any such tragicall action , or passion , to any such end , and purpose , as you , from him , pretend . Wherefore I must leaue you both to deuide this wrong betwixt your selues ; which is so much the greater ( whether in you , or in him ) because you are one , whom I neuer offended ; he is one , whom I euer loued . And what soeuer the effects of his friendshipp toward me , haue been , they are not proportionable vnto this discourtesy , if the matter it self were true ; as , God knoweth , it is most false . Seneca said wisely , vpon his owne experience ; Quidam sunt amici leues , & inimici graues : which yet I will neuer apply vnto him , vnlesse I find , by better information , then you seeme either to receiue , or giue , that he hath done me this wrong , which you haue published in his name . And so much for the first .

6. Your SECOND proof ensueth ; viz. x x pag. 17. The small liking , which you haue to the Romish Religion , you sufficiently manifested , when as being reconciled to that Synagogue , by one Flud , a Priest , you did yet , after your returne out of Yorkeshire , write a little Pamphlett of Veniall , and Mortall sinnes , flat against the principles of that profession .

7. If after Reconciliation vnto the Catholick Church , I had written , or spoken against any article of hir faith , my crime toward hir , might seeme inexpiable , and your aduantage against me , very great . Howbeit , it is neither the one , that I am guilty of , nor the other , which I feare ; but it was your pleasure , Sir , to make a chayne of such wrongs , & to weaue them in your discourse .

8. I answere therefore , FIRST ; that I wrote not that little Pamphlett , after my returne out of Yorkeshire , but before . SECONDLY ; that as I came vnreconciled into the presence of that Venerable Priest ( F. Flud ) so I neuer saw him , nor heard of him , vntill my arriuall in S. Omers ; where also himself had remayned one whole yeare ( at the least ) before that time . And I meruayle , that your intelligencer concealed this point from your notice ; which he could not but know much more certainly , then that I was reconciled by such a Priest : though heere also I leaue your informer , and your self , vnto your better proofes . THIRDLY ; that I wrote it according to my opinion therein , precisely at that howre . And truly this was one of the 3. or 4. points , wherein I had the learned , judicious , and expedite resolution of that Reuerend Priest , after my arriuall ; being perswaded ( absolutely ) in most points , at that time , and chiefly in the chiefest , & metropoliticall question , concerning the ❀ ❀ Men must diligently seek out the true Church , that so they may rest in hir judgement , sayth D. Field in his epist. dedicat . CHVRCH . So then I neither wrote agaist that , which I did belieue , nor yealded vnto that , which I did not conceiue . FOVRTHLY ; that the occasion of writing it , was a certain conference betwixt me , and a Catholick gentleman ; vnto whose hands I deliuered it , and desired him to procure me a good resolution thereunto . FIFTLY ; that the occasions of publishing it , were many , and one principall ; viz. to diuert a strong suspition , intertayned ( somewhere ) to my prejudice , as I was induced to think by sondry reasons . SIXTLY ; that some particulars in that pamphlet ( as namely , * * in fine . Secreta mea mihi , &c. haue long since made the construction more cleare vnto Sir Edward , and his world , which , sometimes , was more secrete , and obscure .

9. This is ( good Readers ) the true text of this matter , which now I referr vnto your judicious interpretation . Let me add onely a word ( for a finall complement herein ) and say thus much ; that if I were as guilty of , or in this fault , as my Accuser would make you belieue , yet I might be excused rather then y y See the Examen of Fox his Calendar . Part. 1. pag. 374. &c. CRANMER himself , whose seuerall Treatises pro , & contra , for , and against the Reall Presence , were exhibited by Bonner in a publick Iudgement ; when it was no small mortification ( you may think ) vnto that chandged Father , to behold the faces of his vnlike children . Wherefore , z z Ouid. Met. 13. Haud timeo , si jam nequeo defendere crimen , Cum tanto commune vivo .

10. But as there is no proportion in our faults ( if yet I committed any ) in respect of all the circumstances , of Person , matter , manner , &c. so ZWINGLIVS , a greater Patriarch then he ( and one of the a a Apo. 11.3 . two witnesses against Antichrist , as b b de Relig. in exposit. 4. Praecepti . Zanchius belieueth ) may hold out his buckler for my defence . For he ( * * Sir Edw. phrase . pag. 100. mark you me now ) falling away from Luther , and teaching a doctrine ( of the Sacrament ) contrary vnto his former preachings , confesseth plainely , that c c De vera , & falsa Relig. he knew the truth long before , but he serued the time ; wherein he is commended by Christ as a faithfull , and wise seruant , who giueth meate vnto his family in due season . So sayth your Zwinglius : of whom the censure of d d De Eucharist . lib. 1. c. 1. Bellarmine is ( perhapps ) very true ; to witt : Zwinglius betrayeth his impiety to couer his ignorance . Howsoeuer it be ; the censure of his fellow witnesse , e e Loc. Com. Luth. Fabric . classe 5. pag. 50. M. LVTHER , is very terrible against all that Sacramentary faction ; viz. He that taketh pleasure in his owne damnation , let him belieue that the truth is taught by theis Spirits , since they beganne , and defend their opinions by lies .

11. So much for your second proof ; and now to your THIRD , which you deliuer in theis words . f f pag. 19. It is not long since you haue complayned , through impatient emulation , and ambition , that , if you might haue been then preferred , and not aduised rather to returne to the Vniuersity , to repayr your wings ; You would not haue changed your copy so soone , nor made so sorry a flight from vs to ROME . This you know to be well knowen , and , vpon farther occasion , may be better specified vnto the world .

12. I answere ; The thought neuer entered into my heart , the speach neuer proceeded out of my mouth . And I am glad , as well for your owne , as my sake , that you haue some other Authour , then your self ( who sitt at the receipt of custome , and keepe an auditt of intelligences ) to specify in theis behalf ; that so , when he commeth forth , and crieth adsum , I may answere confidently , and say vnto his face , * * Psal. 26.12 . Mentita est iniquitas sibi . Wherefore , remooue theis wrongs from your self vnto their proper Authours , that I may behold them in their owne center : then you are free , whosoeuer shal be found guilty in this matter . For I assure you , that I am incredibly abused ; and , whosoeuer the Authour be , I beseech the Readers to vnderstand , that g g Matth. 1● . 28 . Inimicus homo hoc fecit .

§. 2. Of vnnaturall affection to my Father .

1. SIR Edward is desirous to make me odious , and contemptible in the eye of his world ; and therefore he would shew , that I am an vnnaturall Husband to my Wife , and , likewise , an vnnaturall Sonne vnto my Father ; persons , that should be conjoyned with indissoluble bands of loue . For the bands betwixt the first , are , sacramentally , Supernaturall ; betwixt the second , intrinsecally Naturall , and Inseparable in both . In the first two are made one : in the second , one brancheth from the other : so that , betwixt the Husband , and Wise , there is a concourse of equall duties : from the Father there is a decourse of affection vnto the Sonne , and , from the Sonne , a recourse vnto the Father .

2. How I am condemned in the first respect , you haue h h Chap. 1. §. 4. already seene ; how I am condemned in the second , you shall now receiue a double proof . FIRST . Your Father tooke a long iourney ( saith i i pag. 17. Sir Edward ) to seek out his lost Sonne , who neuer opened his mouth to aske him blessing for his paynes . Then ( after an amplification of no value , or su●stance ) he addeth : k k pag. 18. Was not this , I say , grief inough , but that you must depriue him also of that priuate duty , which was due vnto him ? And hereupon ( amongst the rest ) he breaketh out into this passion ; l l pag. 22. If theis be the fruicts of your Religion , my Soule abhorreth it .

3. Spare my Religion , good Sir ( least you increase the wrong ; extending it vnto many others , yea vnto God himself ) and lay the faults vpon my person alone : so all Readers may condemne me , as a man vnworthy to draw any more ayre , or to tread any longer vpon the earth . For though all are not Fathers , yet all are children ; & so , Piety in them will detest such impiety in me .

4. But , m m Daniel . 13.4 . reuertimini ad judicium , &c. Returne vnto iudgement ( you impartiall Readers ) and you shall see , that I will specify in my owne defence . And what specification can be more effectuall in this case , then to produce those persons , who , onely , can be witnesses either for Sir Edward , or against me , in this behalf ?

5. Theis are my Father himself , and my * * See before ; §. 1 ●…num . 3. ancient friend . For my Father can not deny , that , as soone as I came into his vnexpected presence ( which was vpon a sonday , in the afternoone ) I did immediately humble my knee , as low as my foote , and desired his benediction , as in former times . The same night , and likewise the next morning ( in the sight , and audience of M. Etkins , at each time ) I performed the same duty , and in the same manner . Vpon his departure , the same day , I intreated his blessing also , though not with the like humiliation of my body , as before , because our Fare-well was taken in the open streetes .

6. And thus ( as you see ) at 4. seuerall times , in the space of 24 howres , I most humbly , and affectionately yealded that priuate duty vnto my louing Father , which Sir Edward first affirmeth , and then amplifieth vpon it , at his pleasure ( before , to myne , now to his owne disgrace ) that I NEVER opened my mouth to do . But he , that accuseth me herein , is the same man , who sayd ; n n See Chap. 1. §. 1. num. 4.14 . In your long prayer , at S. Dunstanes , the Reuerend . BB. ( yea euen your owne Lord , & Maister ) were EVER left out for wranglers , and Antichristian Hierarchies , &c.

7. Now , if I would insist in the stepps of your amplifying vayne , you , Sir Edward , might pardon my just plea against your injust wrongs ; and others would say , that it were lex talioms ; a reflexion of your owne pen , and a * * Agens agendo repatitur . repassion from your owne action . But it was my o o See before ; Chap. 1. §. 2. num. 17. promise to spare you , though I payed others ; and so I remitt vs both vnto them , who haue interest to giue their censure in theis things . For they , who will aduenture to write , can not exempt themselues from the jurisdiction of their Readers ; but they hold out their hands for euery man to feele their pulse , and to judge of their temper . And so much for your first ; now to your SECOND proof ; which is more capitall .

8. p p pag. 18. Contrary to your Fathers expresse commandement , and request , and your owne solemne promise made vnto him , you made his presence knowen to your CONFESSOVR : whereby he might haue been in danger , as much as in you lay , to haue lost not onely his vnnaturall Sonne , but euen his dearest life , in a strange land .

9. Rhetorick still ; but more bloudy then before . As for my self ( the principall in this accusation ) I will say nothing : yet giue me leaue to speake for others , who am thus condemned my self . Let me then be punctuall with you , and search into the probability of this danger . What was it , which my Father , & my Friend did feare ? Open HOSTILITY , or priuate VIOLENCE , or formall IVSTICE ?

10. Not open hostility ; for there is a confirmed peace , a free intercourse , and inter-traffique betwixt each contrey . And how many Protestants , of different quality , as well before , as since that time , haue conuersed in S. Omers , more publiquely also , without any molestation ? Yea I know , that some gaue offence , but receiued none .

11. Not priuate violence ; for what example haue you in this kind ? If any , produce it : if none , why should they be the first ? And because you seeme to lay a suspition vpon the Fathers of the SOCIETY ; let me aske you first , whether I am , or were , in any grace with them , or no ? You say that I am ; & your owne language is this : q q pag. 4. You are matriculated amongst those merciles helhounds . Let me aske you secondly ; whether , you think , I had so little grace in me , that I would not haue interposed my life , and bloud , to hinder such an vnchristian designe ?

12. Accuse me , as you please ; but let it not be offensiue vnto you , that I should speake for others , and testify what I know , vpon my owne experience ; which teacheth me to speake better things . First then , I say for that SOCIETY ; that , as their state of life is , so are their actions ; religious . I am a witnesse ( for as I haue heard , so I haue seene ) of the candour , and sweetnesse , wherewith those Fathers haue intertayned their contreymen ( different from them in Religion , as my Father is ) and gaue no signification ( in their words , or actions ) of domestick sufferings : 1 Gen. 45. like Ioseph , forgeting , and forgiuing , the vnkindnesse of his Brethren ; recompencing the hatred , which they find at home , with loue in a strange land . Which as the parties can not deny , so they can not but confesse also , that they were not in feare of the dangers , which Sir Edward doth suggest , nor in hope of the courtesies , which themselues did find . For which , then , of their good deeds , will he stone theis Fathers ?

13. Secondly ; I can not be silent in the behalf of my Confessour ( least I should deny his singular merits ) the instrumentall Cooperatour with God , vnto my vnspeakeable comfort . Why should Sir Edward accuse him , whose innocent thoughts were not embrued in this imaginary effusion of bloud ? He loued the Sonne too well to hate the Father : neither was there any cause for my corporall Father to be jealous of my spirituall Father ; since his care was to saue my soule , but not to destroy his life .

14. Now , if open hostility , and priuate violence could not be feared , was it the forme of Iustice , which was dreadfull in their thoughts ? By what sword ? Ecclesiasticall , or Temporall ? Not Ecclesiasticall ; for as there is no Inquisition , which you can pretend ; so the Iurisdiction of the Bishopp could not minister occasion of their feare . For the most Reuerend ¶ ¶ D. IACOBVS BLASAEVS ; natione Flander , affectione Anglus . Bishopp of that City ( s s Sir Edward ; speaking of Francis , Duke of Anjou . pag. 106. of whom I am glad to make so worthy mention ; as well in respect of his owne parts ; he being a second , true Ambrose , in whom the great variety of learning is accompanied with eminent sanctity of life , and an excellent grauity of person , tempered with gratious affability of nature ; as also in respect of his generall loue vnto our contreymen , and speciall benefitts vnto many ; in which number I am ) the Bishopp , I say , being not their Pastour , had neither will , nor power , to proceed against such , as offend not by publick , and notorious scandall ; from which they did wholly decline , as knowing what appertayneth vnto honest , and good deportment in theis affaires . Not Temporall ; for the cause being not ciuill , but religious , the temporall sword dependeth vpon the ecclesiasticall , and is not drawen before ; but after it ; as t t S. Bernard . de Consider. lib. 4. S. Bernard saith : the materiall sword , and spirituall sword are both belonging vnto the Church : that is to be exercised for the Church , this by the Church ; this by the hand of the Priest , that by the hand of the soldier ; sed sanè ad nutum Sacerdotis , & jussum Imperatoris .

15. If then they were ( as , indeed , they were ) free from danger in , or by any of theis meanes , either u u Psal. 52.6 . they feared , where no feare was , or , by this pretense of feare , they would deriue hatred vpon those men , who were desirous to giue them the pledges of their loue . And this is no new deuise in our contreymen ( of Sir Edwards Religion ) to speak euill for good ( vpon their returne out of Catholick lands ) to procure vnjust hatred by vnnecessary feare : as ❀ ❀ Numb. 13 33. some vngratefull visitours of Canaan , did speake euill of it , and gaue out reports of the terrible Giants therein , purposely to deterr the people from making entrance into the land of promise .

§. 3. Violation of promises , and Oaths .

1. I Am now arriued vpon the last accusation , which toucheth my infidelity , and perjury . An example of the first , was mentioned * * §. 2. num. 8. before , and is to be considered heere ; viz. Contrary to your solemne promise , you made your Fathers presence knowen to your Confessour . Which accusation may appeare vntrue ; because the Letter ( whereof something is † † Chap. 1. §. 2. num. 11. already spoken ) though it hath not fauoured me in any relation , yet it is wholly silent in this point . For thus saith the Authour thereof , in my Fathers name . Being in S. Omers , I willed , and chardged him ( my Sonne ) not to reueale my being there : not withstanding he made it knowen the same night ; as , vpon examination , he confessed vnto me the next morning : which made vs presently to come away , fearing our liues to be in danger amongst such a company of helhounds , as that towne is stuffed withall .

2. Behold ( on my Fathers part ) willing , and chardging me not to reueale his presence : but ( on my part ) no promise ; either simple , or solemne . Which point being of singular aduantage against me , if it had been true , had not been concealed in that Letter , wherein each particular hath the waight of all circumstances ( more then due also ) to aggrauate the quality of my offence . But as my memory doth not witnesse , nor my conscience accuse me of any such solemne promise , so it imported me , for just causes , to retayn my liberty therein .

3. For when my Father , and my Friend ( whose true name , and quality were knowen , vpon some accident , before I saw him ) pressed me very earnestly to returne ; I desired , of them , a time of deliberation , for my mature , and certayn answere . x x Cic. Diu deliberandum , quod statuendum semel . I was to consider long vpon that , which I was , but once , to vndertake ; my case being like vnto his , who hath the conduct of an army , & can make but one fault in warr ( as y y Plutarch , in apo●… Reg. & 〈◊〉 Scipio said ; A man can not make two faults in warr ) because there is no remedy , but ruine by the first , before he can committ the second . So it was in my affaire ; I was to stand , or fall , in body , and soule , vpon this acceptance , & present choyce .

4. Whereupon , finding my self mooued in conscience to take aduise with , and from , him , whose counsayle was vnto me , as the oracle of God , in all spirituall things ; I acquainted my Father , expressly , with my resolution herein ; shewing him also , that , by detection of his presence , no danger should , or could ensue . And though he was very willing to diuert me from this course , yet , seeing my constancy , he made me an absolute ( I might say solemne ) promise , not to depart from S. Omers , before the tuesday morning ; so that I should haue the whole monday for time of deliberation , according to my request . So still , here was no promise from me , not to reueale his presence ; but rather the contrary : and this may be sufficient vnto the objection of the Knight .

5. Now , whatsoeuer my Fathers commandement , or chardge was , or howsoeuer he may think , that I erred in obedience , or others , that I fayled in discretion ; yet my conscience did thus solicite me , with hir effectuall motions . But whereas it is sayd farther , that I , vpon examination the next morning , confessed , how I had reuealed his presence , the last light , vnto a Popish Priest , and that THIS made him come away , fearing , &c. I must humbly intreate pardon to shew , that my confession was not the cause of this sodayn departure .

6. For when I tooke leaue of him , and of my friend , vpon the Sonday night , I left them in their resolution ( as it seemed vnto me ) to expect my answere ( for returne ) vpon monday in the euening , or ( rather ) vpon tuesday morning ; and , accordingly , I intended to prepare my answere , either yea , or no , as the difficulties should present themselues vnto me , vpon more exact recollection of my thoughts . Howbeit , comming vnto his chamber , on the monday morning , I found him prouiding to be gone , with as much speed , as he could . Wherefore my sayd confession ( that I had reuealed his presence vnto a Popish Priest ) was not occasion of that departure , which he had prepared , and resolued vpon , before I entered into his sight . And though this were no lesse grieuous vnto me , then vnexpected , yet he gaue me no such reason of this departure ; but , that his money fell short ; things were vncertayn ; &c.

7. Thus much of my Infidelity ; now I am to treate of Perjury : whereof three remonstrances are produced by the Knight . FIRST . z z pag. 17. You did protest , as you hoped to haue any part in our Sauious passion , that , within three weeks , at the farthest ( if you liued so long ) you would be in England , after your Fathers returne ; &c. a a pag. 18. You made your Father a sorrowfull witnesse of your perjurious vow .

8. I will not deny any thing , b b pag. 12. whereunto my Knowledge can suscribe . It is true therefore ; I promised to returne . But you must obserue with me FIRST , the inference of this point , and the connexion , which it hath with the premises . viz. You wrote a little Pamphlet contrary vnto the principles of the Romish profession . When ? After your reconciliation vnto that Synagogue . What doth that prooue ? Your small liking vnto that Religion . And ( sayth the Knight , immediately therevpon ) were you not now in Hucksters hands , whose vigilant eyes haue mewed you vp in their idolatrous cage , I dare say you had been in England long si●…ce ; FOR so you did protest , &c. Behold then the inference , heere , is to shew my procliuity to renounce the Catholick Romane faith , as a thing not intertayned in the secrete approbation of my heart . But of this scandalous imputation I haue already treated in the * * §. 1. num. 6 &c. precedents ; vnto which I must now remitt the courteous Reader .

9. SECONDLY ; the manner of this protestastion ( viz. as I hoped to haue any part , &c. ) I neither can remember , nor will acknowledge to haue proceeded from my lippes . That , which my memory , and conscience can best testify vnto me , is , that I sayd ; by the grace of God . Which is a speach of great importance , I confesse ; but yet ( formally ) it hath not such power in exaggeration , as the other .

10. THIRDLY ; because Sir Edward doth deale so precisely with me , I may not giue him leaue thus to circumcise the time , nor to chandge my words , at his owne pleasure . For I sayd not absolutely , WITHIN THREE WEEKES , at the farthest , I will returne ; but I added a forsan ( with which particle Sir Edward helpeth himself c c pag. 47. elsewhere , to triumph ouer me , yet without a victory ) PERHAPPS within three , or four weeks : I cannot certainly resolue vpon the time . And so , I know no reason , why , vpon my returne within this yeare , or more , my word might not stand inuiolate , and entire , in that respect , if I would rather presse Sir Edward with outward reasons , them acquaint him with my inward thoughts .

11. To come then more particularly vnto matter it self ; as I deny not my speach , and , therewith , my intention , that , by the grace of God , I would returne , &c. so there are many circumstances heerein , and specially three , which may ease the burthen , and cleare the difficulty , on my behalf .

12. FIRST ; that my Father , and friend , knew my resolution to be vnprepared ; and yet now they would force it vnto a birth , before the prefixed time . For it was my HOPE , and it was their PROMISE , that I should haue the whole Monday for my deliberation ; which was now denied . Wherefore this their sodayn ( and vnnecessary ) departure ( contrary vnto both ) was the first cause of my abortiue promise ; borne , before it was conceiued .

13. SECONDLY ; my sympathizing eyes beheld the streame of teares , flowing from a deepe fountayn of loue , and grief , in my deare , and carefull Father : which was the strongest eloquence of Nature to perswade my vnperswaded self ; who ( being * * S. August . Conf. lib. 3. cap. 12. filius tantarum lachrymarum ) knew not what to say , or think , when my Soule suffred a dissipation of all hir powers . Mettall so softened was fitt for any impression . It was not a returne , into a CONTREY , with a FATHER ( things of no small value , in all mens estimation ) but the present expense of my dearest life , which I could , and should haue promised to satisfy such loue , and to mollify such grief . Si haec tempestas propterme orta est , &c. if all this be for my sake , dispose of me , at your owne will .

14. THIRDLY ; though I was thus preuented by them , besides my expectation , and so caried out of my self , beyond my strength ; yet there was annexed vnto my promise of returne , a condition of security . But where should I rereiue it ? At Douer .

15. Behold now my errour , which drew on my fault . For hauing thus incautelously , and improuidently ( in my benummed spirits ) made my promise to returne , so that I might receiue security at Douer ; and perceiuing , afterward , what danger I might incurre ( though I doubted not of my friends good will , but of their power onely ) I desired , that my security might giue me meeting at Calais : least , otherwise , the Land might prooue more dangerous then Sea ; and specially for two reasons . The ONE ; because I then had ( as now I haue ) a grounded resolution of heart , to remayn a constant member of the Catholick , Romane Church ( from which the certainty of faith is to be sought , saith d d Part. 1. Serm. coram Alexand. 5. Gerson ; a e e D. Field . pag. 85. worthy guide of Gods Church ) & therefore I should be lesse acceptable vnto them , whom , in all temporall things , I would gladly reuerence , and obay . The OTHER ; because I stood then charged vpon the point of Reconciliation , which M. Etkins did insinuate vnto me at S. Omers , and Sir Edward hath now published in his Letter , to prejudice the integrity of my * * §. 1. num. 6.7.8 . Faith , and safety of my Life . But as he doth vntruly accuse me of Reconciliation in ENGLAND , so my ignorance of the Law made me too confident , and too fearrefull also ; in this respect . Too confident ; for when I knew , experimentally , that Reconciliation is onely a Sacramentall act , to reduce vs into the fauour of God , and vnity of his Church , I did not suspect the seuerity of the Law therein ; & therefore , out of the comfort , and exultation of mine owne heart , I imparted something , in this behalf , by my Letters vnto a person of eminent dignity , and place . Too fearfull : for vnderstanding ( afterward ) the penalty of Reconciliation , and not knowing how farr the statute extendeth in this case , I thought the perill to be equall , whether within his Majesties dominions , or without the same ; neither had I any notice to the contrary , till I perused the statutes ; not many howres , before the writing hereof .

16. Now , if my Father , and my Friend , did feare the losse of their dearest liues , where no law was in force against them , nor any man conceiued a thought prejudiciall vnto the least droppe of their bloud , and yet did therefore depart from S. Omers , against their owne promise , and without any cause ; had not I just reason to prouide securely for my self , when my life should be * * As I conceiued , in manner aforesayd . actually in the mercy of justice , & exposed vnto continuall danger , vpon some ineuitable acts of my Religion ?

17. Thus you ( see ●ood Readers ) wherein I fayle , as also vpon what precedent , and consequent reasons . If , heeretofore , you haue wholly condemned me , I appeale from your first , vnto your second , and better thoughts . If , now , you excuse me wholly , you do more for me , then I would do for my self . For as I find some thing , which I may defend , and some thing , which I may excuse , so there is some thing , which I may , and do condemne . And so I recommend my self , with this matter , vnto the mercy of God , and vnto the charity of the Readers ; desiring them to make this case their owne , before they giue their sentence vpon me .

18. The SECOND remonstrance of my perjury , Sir Edward deliuereth in this sort . f f pag. 18. The like solemne oath you tooke in the presence of M. Etkins , that , vpon the faith of a Romane Catholick , and as you hoped to be saued , this booke of yours , which you then shewed him , should not be printed .

19. A solemne promise before ; and now a solemne oath ; in both which your dealing is not simple , but double . Leauing therefore the formes of theis protestations , as calumniating exaggerations ( for , euermore , there is ❀ ❀ 4. Reg. 4.40 . Mors in olla ; some euill herb in your best pottage ) I answere , that it was my promise , and resolution to suppresse that booke . But how ? Respectiuely , vpon the opinion , and hope of my returne ; which comming not to passe , according to my just , and necessary desire , I was , and am ( in conscience , and in reason ) acquitted from that promise . Heere also you must obserue , that M. Etkins was at S. Omers in May , and that this Booke was suppressed vntill † † It was then first commited to the presse . October ensuing : whereby you may perceiue , that , till I was in despayr of returne , I gaue it not leaue to issue forth into the publick view .

20. Farther ; I was yet prouoked hereunto by many , and grosse indignities ; of some my Betters , whom I alwayes honoured ; of some my Equalls , whom I alwayes loued ; of some my Inferiours , whom I neuer offended ; of many strangers , whom I had wronged , no more then Sir Edward himself ; and this , he will confesse , was in a very meane degree .

21. Finally ; charity vnto my self , to vindicate my name from reproach ; charity vnto others , to draw them out of the snare of death ; and ( aboue all ) my gratitude vnto my Lord for his great mercy , did vrdge , inforce , and impell me vnto that course .

22. I come now vnto the THIRD , and last remonstrance of my perjury ; viz. g g pag. 18. Your Wife , and Creditours are throughly acquainted with many such your voluntary , and intended perjuries ; as , vpon your next reply , shall be more particularly specified : vnder whose name so euer you meane to couer it .

23. You see that I come vnmasked into your presence ; I borrow not the face of any man to couer my shame : Specify therefore , if you please ; and , if it be an act of Cheualry to be an Index-maker of other mens liues , spare me not : Vtere tuo judicio ; nihil enim impedio . But yet , * * Terent . And. Act. 1. Sc. 2. Ne temerè facias , neque tu haud dicas tibi non praedictum , CAVE . Let discretion be the vsher of your action , and temember , that TAKE HEED is a fayr warning .

24. Now to your accusation . It may seeme strange , that neither your Charity preuayled with you , nor Philosophy taught you , to deale more sparingly with my Intention ; which being not a transient , but an immanent act ( inhering in the will ) is knowen ( certainly ) vnto none , but vnto God alone ; by whom also it may be communicated vnto others , by reuelation , or represented by vision , according to his pleasure .

25. But it is a more vnchristian , and vnknightly part to make my WIFE a witnesse against me ( & specially , without any iust cause ) which the Lawes themselues permitt not , or exact not , in cases of greater importance . Howbeit , my charity toward hir will make me vncharitable toward you . Wherefore , Sir , I belieue you not . Your wrongs against me teach me , that you may wrong hir ; so that , accepting your testimony in this case , I should make a forfaiture of my reason .

26. As for my Creditours ; I confesse vnto you , that , vpon probability , or hope , or ( supposed ) certainty of receiuing moneyes , I haue been sometimes deceiued , and they , consequently , by me . I confesse vnto you farther , that , neere vpon my departure , I was more liberall in my promise vnto one man , then I should haue been . And thus Sir Edward also is now become my CONFESSOVR ; who ( I doubt not ) for my plainenesse , and syncerity , will giue me a speedy absolution , and a gentle pennance .

27. Heere ( courteous Readers ) the Scene of criminall accusations is done . Wherefore I will take the Actour aside ( his part being ended ) and , in a friendly manner , I will addresse my self to intertayn him with a new discourse .

§. 4. A kind expostulation with Sir Edward , vpon the former wrongs ; and a charitable interpretation thereof .

1. SIR EDWARD ; there are three things , which I esteeme very deare , & pretious : the safety of my Life ; the honesty of my Name ; the saluation of my Soule . The first may be , the second is , the third neither is , nor may be , in your power . The first I will submitt vnto the benignity of my Souereigne , to giue , or take it : the third standeth at the mercy of my Lord , to saue , or destroy it : the second remayneth at the charity of others , to suffer wrong , or to obtayn right . For as in this particular ( concerning my Name ) you are actiue , and I passiue ; so the Reader is vncertayn vnto vs both , either to pronounce me guilty , or you injurious .

2. But I haue vnfolded , and he may now behold , your SIFTING Paragraph ; vnto which if I should giue the due aspiration ( * * Iudic. 12.6 . Shibboleth for Sibboleth ) you might , and he would , pardon my just boldnesse therein .

3. For FIRST ; my Innocency , in the things themselues , pleadeth effectually for my defence , and your reproof . SECONDLY ; my Innocency also toward your owne person ; which I neuer offended by hand , mouth , or heart ; in deed , word , or thought . THIRDLY ; our vnequall quality saith , that a noble Knight should not thus intreate a poore Scholler ; since you should be as farr from doing me a wrong with a Pen , as I am vnable , or vnfitt , to answere it with a Sword . For , howsoeuer you speake of your h h pag. 4. lin. 3. often employments with both , yet I ( and I know not your mind also ) would rather choose , with i i Plutarch . in Eumen. Eumenes , to beare pen , and paper , then , with Neoptolemus , a sword , & targett . FOVRTHLY ; the manner , by which your matter is caried , proclaymeth , that you were more willing to disgrace my name , then able to resolue my doubts .

4. I sayd , and I shewed , that the euidence of Scripture , the rule of Apostolicall Tradition , the practise of the ancient , and VNIVERSALL Church , the consent of Fathers , the vntruths of some chief Protestants , did strongly induce , and perswade me , first to a just suspition , them to a necessary rejection of my late Protestanticall faith . And least the Answerer of my discourse should * * First Motiue . pag. 94. throw dust into the ayre , with more contention , then profitt ( as you haue done ) I preuented such exorbitant courses , and prescribed the due , true , and absolute method , which he must obserue ; viz. to oppose , and to prooue , a CONTRARY assertion vnto each particular in my discourse : as , that Prayer for the dead descended not from the Apostles : that the Vniuersall Church ( in S. Augustines time , euen by his owne testimony ) did not referr Prayer for the dead vnto the SOVLES ; and to the soules , remayning in a temporall payn . &c.

5. Theis things you should haue fairely , and orderly refuted ; taking the particulars in their place , and course , as they were plainely , and methodically represented vnto you in my MOTIVE . Then there had been charity in your paynes , and judgement in your fact . But you ( making a digression in your very ingresse ) sift the causes of my Alienation ( not such as I deliuer , but such as you deuise ) and runne , vastly , into my Puritamsme , my perjury , my vnnaturall affection , my disconceipt toward the Romane faith , &c. that so , vndermining my creditt , with your engins , at the first , you might , afterward , blow me vp with more facility , and ease .

6. Now , for my owne comportment , and behauiour in making my answere vnto this sifting Paragraph ; though the Reader ( I presume ) hath ( or might ) obserue it , without any farther remonstrance , or declaration from me ; yet I will briefly , and plainely bring it vnto his consideration , in this place .

7. FIRST then he might obserue me to be free from the commission of many , and from the concealement of other faults . In the first respect ; a knowen wrong is a sufficient remedy for it self . In the second ; my sorrow may be a satisfaction . k k Senecae . Quem poenitet peccâsse , penè est innnocens . Let my Repentance , therefore , for that , which I haue done amisse , make it vndone , in your charitable thoughts . God himself accepteth this Sacrifice yea his Mercy bindeth the eyes of his Diuinity , hiding that from himself , which euery man seeth , & making him forgett that , which he knew , before it was committed . Heere is the prototypus , by which our acts , and judgements must be drawen ; that so we may make our selues like vnto him in our actions , who made vs like himself in our creation .

8. SECONDLY ; he might obserue my Patience , which sheweth it self in the perpetuall course of my style . We are reuiled , and we reuile not agayn . Heerein I had rather haue a victory ouer my self , to conquere my passions , then ouer you to requite your wrongs . Besides ; I haue had a remembrance , and respect of your bloud , as being a l l pag. 50. Gentleman ; of your quality , as being a Knight ; of your fauour , and grace with his Majesty , as being his m m pag. 105. Seruant ; of your consanguinity , and affinity , as being allyed vnto persons of highest rank ; finally , of your † † pag. 49. affection vnto that ❀ ❀ Oxford . Vniuersity , which I am bound to reuerence , and of your inuestiture therein with a n n pag. 6. Degree , by which you are honoured , and which is honoured by you .

9. Thus I haue subdued my passions vnto the strength of reason , and humbled my reason vnto the power of grace ; that , as the Rock standeth vnmooueable in the raging , and furious waues , so I might be quiet , modest , & temperate in the middest of theis great wrongs ; so great ( perhapps ) as can admitt no parallele in theis later yeares , and vpon the like respects .

10. And thus , as the beneuolous Reader hath seene my cariadge to be no wayes correspondent vnto the wrongs , so farther , he shall now see my CHARITY also ; which will easily belieue , that , since Malice , and Falsehood , are ignoble vices ( and specially in men of his eminent place ) Sir Edward may , and will decline theis imputations , by some probable , and conuenient excuse .

11. FIRST then , it may be , that secrete loue to recall me , and not open malice to defame me , inuited him vnto this course ; as innocent o o Genes. 44. Benjamin was accused of secrete theft , by the policy of Ioseph , his kind , and vnknowen brother . And this I do the rather conceiue , because my ❀ ❀ In the aforesayd Letter . Father himself seemeth to be in hope , that the whole rabble of Papists shall vnderstand so much ( by Sir Edward Hoby ) of the cause of my comming to their hotch-potch Religion , that they will be ashamed to patronize me any longer , if they be not past all shame . The meaning whereof is , either that I should want my part in the † † Terram dedit homimbus . Psal. 113.16 common portion of mankind ( which I can not suppose ) or that , being destitute of relief in all Catholick lands , I might returne home agayn , as the p p Luc. 15. lost Sonne , vnto his louing Father .

12. SECONDLY ; it may be , that , in pursuing , & hunting me , he followed the sent of information , and drew my picture conformably vnto that Idea , which other mens report , and not his owne fiction , had formerly imprinted in his mind . So Pythia gaue hir answere , as she receiued it from Apollo ; and Tiresias prophecied vpon the flight of birds , according to the relation of Manto . In this case , the thing may be false , but the person doth not ❀ ❀ Mentiri est contra mentem ire . S. Aug. lye , whose words are answerable vnto his thoughts .

13. If it be so with you , Sir Edward ( and I wish it so , for your owne honour ) you are wronged the more , but I nothing the lesse . Wherefore ( by allusion , not comparison ) I may iustly say ; q q Io. 19.11 . He , that deliuered me vnto you , hath the greater sinne . A sinne toward me , by abusing my name ; a sinne toward you , by abusing your pen . Such a victory , therefore , as you haue gotten herein , if it were my shame , yet it is also your owne grief . Victus occubuit , & victor fleuit .

14. But yet I liue ; that is the mercy of my Lord : I want not conuenient meanes ; that is the kindnesse of my friends : I remayn in their good opinion , not impayred , but increased ; that is against a subtile ( perhapps malitious ) project . My conscience is free ; wherein I triumph : my name is cleared ; wherein I rejoyce .

15. r r Gal. 6.17 . From henceforth , then , let no man be troublesome vnto me , nor vnto himself . This is my first , and it shall be my last ( the non vltra ) of my labours in this kind . For since my Aduersaries haue fayled in the beginning ( the first borne , & strength ) of their assaults , can I looke for greater exactnesse in their rechardge , & in their second attempt ? No ; s s Io. 2.10 . Omnis homo primùm bonum vinum ponit , et , cùm inebriati fuerint , tunc id , quod deterius est : the best is drawen at the first ; that , which ensueth , is lesse syncere , and pure . Farther ; since a KNIGHT hath fayled in his enterprise , can I expect more fidelity from others , whose quality hath not such a speciall obligation of HONOVR , to require it at their hands ? No ; Schollers , who professe the pen , may be more profound in knowledge , but Knights , who professe the sword , are more punctuall in their credit .

16. Finally therefore ; let my Aduersaries throw out their calumnious scripts , as the haile , yet no indignity shall trouble my composed thoughts ; but , t t Luc 21.19 . possessing my soule in patience , I will answere the Authours with silence , their workes with contempt .

The end of the FIRST PART .