What You Will Marston, John This text is an enriched version of the TCP digital transcription A07081 of text S109900 in the English Short Title Catalog (STC 17487). Textual changes and metadata enrichments aim at making the text more computationally tractable, easier to read, and suitable for network-based collaborative curation by amateur and professional end users from many walks of life. The text has been tokenized and linguistically annotated with MorphAdorner. The annotation includes standard spellings that support the display of a text in a standardized format that preserves archaic forms ('loveth', 'seekest'). Textual changes aim at restoring the text the author or stationer meant to publish. Martin Mueller Incompletely or incorrectly transcribed words were reviewed and in many cases fixed by Hannah Bredar Yixin Xiao This text has not been fully proofread EarlyPrint Project Evanston IL, Notre Dame IN, St.Louis, Washington MO 2017 Distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License A07081.xml VVhat you vvill. By Iohn Marston. Marston, John, 1575?-1634. 32 600dpi TIFF G4 page images University of Michigan, Digital Library Production Service Ann Arbor, Michigan 2003 November (TCP phase 1) 99845540 STC (2nd ed.) 17487. Greg, I, 252(a). 10445 A07081 2240863139

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 VVhat you vvill. By Iohn Marston. What you will What you will. What you wil. Marston, John, 1575?-1634. [64] p. By G. Eld, for Thomas Thorppe, Imprinted at London : 1607. 1601

Partly in verse.

Signatures: A-H4.

Running title reads: What you wil.

The last leaf is blank.

Reproduction of the original in the Folger Shakespeare Library.

 A07081 shc What You Will Marston, John Hannah Bredar Yixin Xiao 1601 play comedy shc no A07081 S109900 (STC 17487). 64 22184 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00 A This text has no known defects that were recorded as gap elements at the time of transcription. Incorporated ~ 10,000 textual changes made to the SHC corpus by Hannah Bredar, Kate Needham, and Lydia Zoells between April and July 2015 during visits, separately or together, to the Bodleian, Folger and Houghton Libraries as well as the Rare Book Libraries at Northwestern University and the University of Chicago Boston Public Library, BRLL

WHAT YOV WILL .

By Iohn Marston .

Imprinted at London by G. Eld for Thomas Thorppe . 1607 .

What you will .
INDVCTION . Before the Musicke sounds for the Acte : Enter Atticus , Doricus , & Phylomuse , they sit a good while on the Stage before the Candles are lighted , talking together , & on suddeine Doricus speakes . Enter Tier-man with lights . Dor.

O Fie some lights , sirs fie , let there be no deeds of darknesse done among vs . — I so , so , pree Tyer-man set Sineor Snuffe a fier , he 's a chollerick Gentleman , he will take Pepper in the nose instantly , feare not , fore Heauen I wonder they tollerate him so nere the Stage .

Phy.

Faith Doricus , thy braine boiles , keele it , keele it , or all the fatt 's in the fire : in the name of Phoebus , what merry Genius haunts thee to day , thy lips play with Feathers .

Dor.

Troth they should pick straws before they should be idle ,

Atti ,

But why , but why doost thou wonder they dare suffer Snuffe so neere the Stage ?

Dor.

O well recald , marry Sir sineor Snuffe , Mounsieur Mew , and Caualiero Blirt , are three of the most to bee fear'd Auditors that euer —

Phy.

Pish for shame , stint thy idle chatte .

Dor.

Nay dreame what-so-ere your fantasie swimmes on Phylomuse , I protest in the loue you haue procured mee to beare your friend the Author , I am vehemently fearefull , this threefold halter of contempt that choakes the breath of witte , these aforesaid tria sunt omnia , Knights of the Meaw will sitt heauie on the skirtes of his Sceanes , if —

Phy. If what ? beleeue it Doricus his spirit , Is higher blouded then to quake and pant At the report of Skoffes Artillery ; Shall he be creast-falne , if some looser braine , In flux of witte vnciuely befilth His slight composures ? shall his bosome faint If drunken Censure belch out sower breath , From Hatreds surfet on his labours front ? Nay say some halfe a dozen rancorous breasts Should plant them-selues on purpose to discharge Impostum'd malice on his latest Sceane Shall his resolue be struck through with the blirt , Of a goose breath ? What imperfect borne ? What short liu'd Meteor ? what cold harted Snow Would melt in dolor ? cloud his mudded eyes Sinck downe his iawes , if that some iuicles husk Some boundlesse ignorance should on sudden shoote His grosse knob'd burbolt , with that s not so good , Mew , blirt , ha , ha , light Chaffy stuff ? Why gentle spirits what loose wauing fane ? What any thing would thus be skru'd about With each slight touch of od Phantasmatas ? No let the feeble palsied lamer ioynts , Leane on opinions crutches , let the — Dor. Nay , nay , nay , Heauen s my hope , I cannot smoth this straine , Witts death I cannot , what a leaprous humor Breaks from ranke swelling of these bubbling wits ? Now out vp-po nt : I wonder what tite braine : Wrung in this custome to mainetaine Contempt Gainst common Censure : to giue stiffe counterbuffes To crack rude skorne euen on the very face Of better audience . Slight i st not odious , Why harke you honest , honest Phylomuse ( You that indeauor to indeere our thoughts , To the composers spirit ) hold this firme : Musike and Poetry were first approu'd By common scence ; and that which pleased most , Held most allowed passe : not rules of Art Were shapt to pleasure , not pleasure to your rules , Thinke you if that his sceanes tooke stampe in mint Of three or foure deem'd most iuditious , It must inforce the world to currant them That you must spit defiance on dislike ? Now as I loue the light were I to passe Through publick verdit , I should feare my forme Least ought I offerd were vnsquard or warp'd , " The more we know , the more we know we want " What Bayard boulder then the ignorant ? " Beleeue me Phylomuse : ifaith thou must " The best best seale of wit , is wits distrust . Phy.

Nay gentle Doricus .

Dor.

I le here no more of him , nay and your friend the Author , the composer : the What you will : seemes so faire in his owne glasse , so straight in his owne measure that hee talkes once of squinting Critickes , drunken Censure , splay-footed Opinion , iuicles huskes , I ha done with him , I ha done with him .

Phy.

Pew nay then —

Dor.

As if any such vnsanctified stuffe could finde a beeing monge these ingenuous breasts .

Atti

Come , let passe , let passe , le ts see what stuffe must cloath our eares : what 's the plaies name ?

Phy.

What you will .

Dor.

1 st Commedy , Tragedy , Pastorall , Morall , Nocturnal or Historie .

Phy.

Faith perfectly neither , but euen What you will , a slight toye , lightly composed , to swiftly finisht , ill plotted , worse written , I feare me worst acted , and indeed What you will .

Dor.

Why I like this vaine well now .

At.

Come , wee straine the spectators patience in delaying their expected delightes . Let s place our selues within the Curtaines , for good faith the Stage is so very little we shall wrong the generall eye els very much .

Phy.

If you le stay but a little I le accompany you , I haue ingag'd my selfe to the Author to giue a kind of inductiue speech to his Commedy .

At.

Away : you neglect your selfe , a gentleman —

Phy.

Tut I haue vow'd it , I am double charg'd , go of as 't t wil , I le set fire to it .

Dor.

I le not stand it , may chance recoile , and be not stuff'd with salte-peeter , well marke the report , marke the report .

Phy.

Nay pree stay , slid the female presence ; the Genteletza ; the women will put me out .

Dor.

And they striue to put thee out , doe thou indeuor to put them .

Atti.

In good faith if they put thee out of countenance ; put thou them out of patience ; & hew their eares with hacking imperfect vtterance .

Dor.

Goe stand to it , shew thy selfe a tale man of thy tongue , make an honest legge , put off thy Cap with discreete carriage : and so we leaue thee to the kinde Gentlemen , and most respected Auditors . Exeunt , remanet tantum Phylomusus .

PROLOGVS . NOR labours hee the fauor of the rude , Nor offers sops vnto the Stigian Dogge To force a scilence in his viperous toungs : Nor cares he to insinuate the grace , Of loath'd detraction , nor persues the loue Of the nice Criticks of this squeamish age , Nor striues he to beare vp with euery saile Of floting Censure : nor once dreads or care's What enuious hand his guiltles Muse hath struck , , ,Sweet breath from tainted stomacks who can suck : But to the faire proportion'd loues of witte , To the iust skale of euen paized thoughts : To those that know the pangs of bringing forth A perfect feature : to their gentle mindes , That can as soone slight of , as finde a blemish , To those as vmbly lowe as to their feete I am oblig'd to bend : to those his Muse , Makes solemne honour , for their wish'd delight : He vowes industrious sweat shall pale his cheeke , But hee le glose vp sleeke obiects for their eyes : For those he is asham'd , his best 's too badd , A silly subiect too too simply cladd Is all his present , all his ready pay , For many many debts . Giue further day I le giue a Prouerbe , Sufferance giueth ease : So you may once be pai'd , we once may please . Exit .
ACT. 1.
SCAE. 1. Enter Quadratus , Phylus following him with a lute , a Page going before Quadratus with a torch . Phy. O O I beseech you Sir reclaime his wits , My master s mad , starke mad , alasse for loue , Qua. For loue ? nay and he be not mad for hate , T is amiable fortune ; I tell thee youth Right rare and geason : strang ? mad for loue , O show me him I le giue him reasons straight . So forcible so all inuincible , That it shall drag loue out : run mad for loue ? What mortally exsistes , on which our hearts Should be inamored with such passion ? For loue ? come Phylus ; come I le haung his fate , In steed of loue I le make him mad for hate . But troth say what straines his madnesse of ? Phy.

Phantasticall .

Qua. Immure him , skonce him , barrecadoe him in t , Phantasticall mad , thrice blessed heart ; Why harke good Phylus : ( o that thy narrow sence , Could but containe me now ) all that exsists , Takes valuation from oppinion : A giddy minion now : pish , thy tast is dull , And canst not rellish me , come wher 's Iacomo . Enter Iacomo vnbraced and careles drest' Phy.

Looke where he coms : O map of boundles wo !

Iaco. You gleame is day , darknes , sleepe and feare , Dreames , and the vgly visions of the night Are beate to hell by the bright palme of light , Now romes the swaine and whissells vp the morne : Deepe Silence breakes : all things start vp with light , Only my hart , that endles night and day , Lies bed-red , crippeld by coy Lucea , Qua. There 's a straine law . Nay now I seee hee 's madde most palpable , He speakes like a player , hah ! poeticall . Iaco. The wanton spring lyes dallying with the earth , And powers fresh bloud in her decayed vaines , Looke how the new sapt branches are in childe With tender infants , how the Sunne drawes out , And shapes their moysture into thousand formes Of sprouting buddes , all things that show or breath , Are now instaur'd , sauing my wretched brest , That is eternally congeald with Ice Of froz'd , dispaire . O Celia , coy , to nice . Qua.

Still saunce question mad ?

Iaco.

O where doth Piety and Pitty rest ?

Qua. Fetch cordes he 's irrecouerable , mad , ranke madde , He calls for strange Chymeras , fictions That haue no being since the curse of death Was throwne on man : Pitty and Piety , who le daine conuerse with them ? alas vaine head , Pitty and Piety are long since dead . Iaco. Ruine to Chaunce , and all that striue to stand , Like swolne Colosses on her tottering Base . Fortune is blinde — Qua. You lye , you lye , None but a mad man would terme Fortune blind , How can shee see to wound desert so right ? Iust in the speeding place : to girt leud browes With honord wreath ; ha ? Fortune blinde ? away , How can she hud-winkt then so rightly see , To starue rich worth and glut iniquitie ? Iaco.

O Loue !

Qua. Loue ? hang loue , It is the abiect out-cast of the world , Hate all things , hate the world , thy selfe , all men , Hate knowledge , striue not to be ouer-wise , , It drew distruction into Paradise , Hate Honor , Vertue , they are baites , That tice mens hopes to sadder fates , Hate beautie , euery ballad-monger , Can cry his idle foppish humor Hate riches , wealthes a flattering Iacke , Adors to face , mewes hind thy backe . He that is poore is firmely sped , He neuer shall be flattered , All thinges are error , durt and nothing , Or pant with want or gorg'd to lothing , Loue onely hate , affect no higher Then praise of heauen , wine , a fire . Suck vp thy daies in silent breath , When their snuffs out come Sinior death . Now Sir adieu runne mad and twilt , The worst is this my rimes but spilt . Iaco Thy rimes are spilt who would not run ranke mad , To see a wandring French man riuall , nay Out-strip my sute . He kist my Celias cheeke , Qua. Why man I saw my dog euen kisse thy Celias lippes , Iaco. To morrow morne they goe to wed , Qua. Well then I know . Whether to morrow night they goe . Iaco.

Say quick .

Qua

To bed

Iaco. I will inuoke the triple Heccate , Make charmes as potent as the breath of Fate , But I le confound the match , Qua Nay then good day , And you be coniuring once I le slink away , Exit Quadratus . Iaco.

Boy could not Orpheus make the stones to daunce ?

Phy,

Yes Sir .

Iaco.

Bi r Lady a sweete touch : did he not bring Euridice out of hell with his lute .

Phy So they say Sir , Iaco.

And thou chanst bring Celias head out of the window with thy Lute , well hazard thy breath : looke Sir heares a ditty .

T is fouly writ slight wit cross'd here and there , But where thou findst a blot , their fall a teare . The Song . Fie peace , peace , peace , it hath no passion in t . O melt thy breath in fluent softer tunes That euery note may seeme to tricle downe Like sad distilling teares and make : O God That I were but a Poet now t' expresse my thoughts Or a Musitian but to sing my thoughts Or any thing but what I am , sing 't ore once more My greefes a boundles sea that hath no shore . Hee Singes and is answered , from aboue a Willow garland is floung downe and the songe ceaseth . Is this my fauor ? am I crown'd with skorne ? Then thus I manumit my slau'd condition . Celia but heare me execrate thy loue . By heauen that once was consious of my loue By all that is that knowes my all was thine I will perseu with detestation . Thawart without stretched vehemence of hate Thy wished Hymen : I will craze my braine But all disceauer all : thy hopes vnite What rage so violent as loue turn'd spight ? Enter Randolfo and Andrea with a supplication reading . Ra.

Humbly complayning kissing the hands of your excelence your pore orators Randolfo and Andrea beseecheth forbidding of the dishonord match of their Neece Celia Widdow to their Brother — O t will do , t will do , it can not chuse but doe .

And What should one say what should one do now ; vmph If she do match with you same wandring knight Shee 's but vndone , her estimation , wealth — Iaco. Nay sir her estimations mounted vp She shall be Ladi'd and sweete Madam'd now . Ran. Be Ladi'd ha , ha , O could she but recaule The honord Port of her deceased loue ; But thinke whose wife she was , God wot no knights But one ( that title of ) was euen a Prince A Sultane Sollyman : thrice was he made In dangerous armes Venice prouidetore . An. He was a Marchant , but so bounteous Valiant , wise , learned , all so absolute That naughts , was valewed praisfull excellent But in it was he most praisfull excellent . Iaco. O I shall nere forget how he went cloath'd He would maintaine 't a base ill vs'd fashion To bind a Marchant to the sullen habit Of precise black , cheefly in Venice state . Where Marchants guilt the top And therefore should you haue him passe the bridge Vp the Rialto like a soldier ( As still hee stood a Potestate at sea ) Ran. In a black beuer felt , ash colour plaine A Florentine cloth of siluer Ierkin , sleeues White satten cut on tinsell , then long stocke . Iaco. French paines imbroder'd , Gold-smithes worke , O God! Me thinkes I see him now how he would walke : With what a iolly presence he would pace Round the Rialto . Well hee 's soone forgot A straggling sir in his rich bed must sleepe Which if I can not crosse , I le curse and weepe . Shall I be plaine as Truth , I loue your Sister My education birth and wealth deserues her I haue no crosse , no rub to stop my sute But Lauardur 's a knight , that strikes all mute . An.

I ther 's the diuill , she must be Ladi'd now .

Iaco. O ill nurs'd custome no soner is the wealthy Marchant dead His wife left great in faire possessions But giddie rumor graspes it twixt his teeth And shakes it bout our eares . Then thether flock A rout of crased fortunes whose crakt states Gape to be sodderd vp by the rich masse Of the deceased labores , and now and then The troupe of I beseech and I protest And beleeue it sweete , is mix'd with too or three Hopefull , well stockt , neat clothed Cytizens Ran. But as we see the sonne of a Diuine Seldome proues Preacher , or a Lawiers sonne Rarely a pleader , ( for they striue to Run A various fortune from their Auncestors ) So t is right geason for the Marchantes widow , To be the Cytizens lou'd second spouse . Iaco. Variety of obiectes please vs still One dish though nere so cookt doth quickly fill . When diuerse cates the pallats scence delight And with fresh fast creates new appetite Therefore my widdow she casheers the blackes For sweares turnes of the furd-gownes , and suruaies The bedrowle of her sutors thinkes and thinkes , And straight her questing thoughts springs vp a knight , Haue after then a maine the gam 's a foote The match clapt vp , tut t is the knight must do 't . Ran.

Then must my pretty peate be Fan'd and Coach'd .

Iaco Muffd Mask'd and Ladied , with my more then most sweete Madam , But how long doth this perfume of sweete Madam last ? Faith t is but a wash sent . My Riotous sir Beginnes to crack Gestes on his Ladies front , Touches her new stampt gentry , takes a glut Keepes out , abandons home , and spends and spends Till stock be melted , then sir takes vp heere Takes vp there , till no where ought is left . Then for the Low-countries , hay for the French And so ( to make vp rime ) god night sweete wench . Ran.

By blessednesse wee le stop this fatall lot .

Iaco.

But how : but how ?

Ran.

Why stay le ts thinke a plot .

An.

Was not Albano Beletzo honorable rich ?

Ran.

Not peer'd in Venice , for birth , fortune loue .

An.

T is skarce three monthes since fortune gaue him dead .

Ran.

In the blacke fight in the Venetian gulfe .

An.

You hold a truth .

Ran.

Now what a gigglet is this Celia ?

An.

To match so suddaine so vnworthely ?

Ran. Why she might haue — An. Who might not Celia haue ? The passionate inamord Iacomo . Iaco.

The passionate inamord Iacomo .

An.

Of honord linage , and not meanly rich .

Ran. The sprightfull Piso , the great Florentine , Aurelius Tuber . And. And to leaue these all , And wed a wandring Knight Sir Lauerdure , A God knowes what ? Ran.

Brother she shall not , shal our blood be moungreld with the corruption of a stragling French ?

And. Saint Marke she shall not , Iaco.

She shall not fathers by ; our brother soules .

Ran.

Good day .

Iaco. Wish me good day ? it stands in idle stead , My Celias lost , all my good daies are dead . The Cornets sound a florish . Harke Lorenzo Celso the loose Venice Duke , Is going to bed , t is now a forward morne Fore he take rest . O strange transformed sight , When Princes make night day the day there night . And Come wee le peticion him , Iaco. Away away , He skornes all plaints makes iest of serious sute . Ran.

Fall out as 't t will I am resolued to do 't .

The Cornets sound . Enter the Duke coppled with a Lady , two cooples more with them , the men hauing tobacco pipes in their hands , the woemen sitt , they daunce a round . The Petition is deliuered vp by Randolfo , the Duke lightes his tobacco pipe with it and goes out dauncing . Ran.

Saint Marke Saint Marke .

Iaco. Did not I tell you , loose no more rich time , What can one get but mier from a swine ? And. Let s worke a crosse , wee le fame it all aboute The French mans gelded . Ran.

O that s absolute .

Iaco. Fie on t away , she knowes to well t is false , I feare it to well . No no I hau 't will strongly doe 't , Who knowes Francisco Soranza ? Ran.

Pish , pish , why what of him ?

Iaco.

Is he not wondrous like your decea'sd kinsman Albano .

And. Exceedingly the strangest neerly like In voice , in gesture face in — Ran. Nay he hath Albanos imperfection too , And stuttes when he is vehemently mou'd . Iaco. Obserue me then , him would I haue disguis'd , Most perfect like Albano : giuing out , Albano sau'd by swimming ( as in faith 'T is knowne he swome most strangely ) rumor him , This morne arriu'd in Venice , heere to lurke As hauing heard the for-ward Nuptials , T' obserue his wifes most infamous lewd hast And to reuenge — Ran.

I hau 't , I hau 't , I hau 't , 't will be inuincible .

Iaco. By this meanes now some little time we catch , For better hopes at least disturbe the match . And.

I le to Francisco .

Ran. Brother Adrian You haue our brothers picture , shape him to it . And.

Precise in each but Tassell , feare it not .

Ran.

Saint Marke then prosper once , our hopefull plot .

Iaco. Good soules , good day , I haue not slept last night , I le take a nap , then pell mell broach all spight . Exeunt .
ACTVS 2.
SCENA . 1. One knockes : Lauerdure drawes the Curtaines sitting on his bed apparalling himselfe , his trunke of apparaile standing by him . Laue.

Ho Bydett Lackey .

Byd.

Sinior ? Enter Bydett with Water and a Towell .

Laue.

See who knocks , looke you boy , peruse their habits , returne perfect notice , la la ly ro . Exit Bid. & returnes presently .

Byd.

Quadratus .

Lau.

Quadratus , mor dieu , ma vie : I lay not at my lodging to night , I le not see him now on my soule , hee 's in his old Perpetuana sute , I am not within .

Byd.

He is faire , gallant , rich , neate as a Bride-groome , fresh as a new-minted six-pence , with him Lampatho Doria , Symplicius Faber .

Lau.

And in good cloathes .

Byd.

Accoutred worthy a presence .

Lau.

Vdes so : my gold wrought Wast-coate and Night-cap open my Trunck , lay my richest sute on the top , my Veluet slippers , cloth of gold gamashes , where are my cloth of siluer hose , lay them . —

Bydet.

At pawne sir .

Lau.

No sir , I do not bid you lay them at pawne Sir .

Byd.

No sir , you need not for they are there already .

Lau.

Mor du garzone : set my richest Gloues , Garters , Hatts , iust in the way of their eyes , so let them in , obserue mee withall dutious respect , let them in .

Enter Quadratus , Lampatho Doria , and Simplicius Faber . Qua.

Phoebus , Phoebe , Sunne , Moone , and seauen Starres make thee the dilling of Fortune , my sweet Lauerdure , my rich French bloud , ha yee deere rogue , hast any pudding Tobacco ?

Lam.

God morrow Sinior .

Sim.

Mounsieur Lauerdure , do you see that Gentleman , hee goes but in black Sattin as you see , but by Hellicon hee hath a cloth of Tissue wit , hee breakes a iest , ha , hee le raile against the Court til the gallants — O God he is very Nectar , if you but sip of his loue , you were immortall , I must needes make you knowne to him : I le induce your loue with deere regarde . Sinior Lampatho heer s is a French Gentleman Mounsieur Lauerdure a Traueller , a beloued of heauen , courts your acquaintance .

Lam.

Sir I protest I not onely take distinct notice of your deere rarities of exterior presence , but also I protest I am most vehemently inamor'd , and very passionately doate on your inward adornements and habilities of spirit , I protest I shall be proud to doe you most obsequious vassalage .

Qua. Is not this rare now : now by Gorgons head , I gape and am struck stiffe in wonderment , At sight of these strange beasts . You Chamblet youth , Symplicius Faber that Hermophrodite , Party par pale , that bastard Moungerell soule , Is nought but admiration and applause , Of you Lampatho Doria , a fustie caske , Deuote to mouldy customes of hoard eld , Doth he but speake , O tones of heauen it selfe , Doth he once write , O Iesu admirable Cryes out Symplicius : then Lampatho spittes , And sayes faith 't is good . But O to marke you thing Sweate to vnite acquaintance to his friend , Labour his praises and indeere his worth With titles all as formally trickt forth , As the Cap of a Dedicatorie Epistle , Then sir to view Lampatho , he protests , Protests and vowes , such suddeine heate of loue , That O t were warmth inough of mirth to drie , The stintlesse teares of old Heraclitus Make Nyobe to laugh . Lam.

I protest I shall bee proud to giue you proofe , I hold a most religious affiance with your loue .

Lau. Nay gentle Sinior : Lam.

Let mee not liue els , I protest I will straine my vtmost sinues , in strengthning your pretious estimate , I protest , I will do all rights in all good offices that friendship can touch , or amplest vertue deserue .

Qua I protest beleeue him not , I le beg thee Lauerdure For a conceal'd Ideot if thou credit him , Hee 's a Hyena , and with Ciuitt scent Of perfum'd words , drawes to make a prey For laughter of thy credit . O this hote crackling loue That blaseth on an instant , flames me out On the least puffe of kindnesse , with protest , protest , Catzo I dread these hotte protests , that presse Come on so fast , no , no , away , away , You are a common friend or will betray . Let me clip amity , that 's got with sute , I hate this whorish loue that 's prostitute . Lau. Horne on my Tailor , could he not bring home , My Sattin Taffeta , or Tissue sute : But I must needs bee cloath'd in Wollen thus . Bydett , what sayes he for my Siluer hose ? And Prim-rose Sattin Doublet , God s my life , Giues he no more obseruance to my body . Lam. O in that last sute gentle Lauerdure , Visite my lodging : by Appollos front Do but inquire my name ; O straight thei le say Lampatho sutes him-selfe in such a hose . Sim.

Marke that Quadratus .

Lam.

Consorts him-selfe with such a doublet .

Sim.

Good , good , good , O Iesu admirable .

Lau.

La la ly ro Sir .

Lam.

O Pallas ! Quadratus , harke , harke , a most compleat phantasma , a most ridiculous humor , pree thee shoote him through and through with a iest , make him lye by the lee , thou Basilisco of witte .

Sim.

O Iesu , admirably well spoken , Angelicall tongue .

Qua. Gnathonicall Coxcombe , Lam.

Nay pre-thee , fut feare not he 's no edge toole , you may iest with him .

Sim.

No edge-toole , oh !

Qua.

Tones of heauen it selfe .

Sim.

Tones of heauen it selfe .

Qua.

By blessednesse I thought so .

Lam.

Nay when , when ?

Qua.

Why thou Pole-head , thou Ianus , thou poultron , thou protest , thou Eare-wig that wrigglest into mens braines : thou durty cur that be-mierst with thy fawning , thou —

Lam. Obscure me , or — Qua.

Synior Lauerdure , by the hart of an honest man , this Iebusite , this confusion to him , this worse then I dare to name , abuseth thee most incomprehensibly ; is this your protest of most obsequious vassalage , protest to straine your vtmost summe , your most —

Lam. So Phoebus warme my braine , I le rime thee dead , Looke for the Satyre , if all the sower iuice Of a tart braine , can sowse thy estimate , I le pickle thee . Qua. Ha he mount Chirall on the wings of fame . A horse , a horse , my kingdom for a horse , Looke the I speake play scrappes . Bydet I le downe Sing , sing , or stay wee le quaffe or any thing Riuo , Saint Marke , le ts talke as losse as ayre Vn-wind youthes coullors , display our selues So that you enuy-starued Curre may yealpe And spend his chappes at our Phantasticknesse . Sym.

O Lord Quadratus .

Qua. Away Idolater , why you Don Kynsayder Thou Canker eaten rusty curre , thou snaffle To freer spirits . Think'st thou a libetine , am vngiu'd breast Skornes not the shacklesse of thy enuious clogges You will traduce vs vnto publicke skorne . Lam.

By this hand I will .

Qua. A fuotra for thy hand , thy heart , thy braine , Thy hate , thy malice , Enuie , grinning spight Shall a free-borne that holdes Antypathy . Lam.

Antypathy .

Qua. I Antypathy . A natiue hate vnto the curse of man , bare-pated seruitude , Quake at the frownes of a ragg'd Satyrist A skrubbing railer whose course harden'd fortune Grating his hide , gauling his starued ribs Sittes houling at Deserts more battle fate Who out of dungeon of his black Dispairs Skoules at the fortune of the fairer Merit . Lau.

Tut Via let all runne glib and square .

Qua. Vds futt hee cogges and cheates your simpler thoughtes , My spleen 's a fire in the heate of hate I beare these gnats that humme aboute our eares , And stinge blister our credit 's in obscured shades . Lau. Pewte bougra la , la , la , titt shaugh Shall I forbeare to caper , sing , or vault To weare fresh cloathes or weare perfum'd sweetes To trick my face , or glory in my fate , T' abandon naturall propensitudes My fancies humor , for a stiffe ioynted , Tattr'd nasty taber fac'd , puh , la , la , ly ro Qua. Now by thy Ladies cheeke I honor thee My rich free-bloud , O my deere libertine I could suck the iuice , the sirrop of thy lippe , For thy most generous thought . My Elysium . Lam.

O Sir you are so square you skorne repoofe .

Qua. No sir should discreete Mastigophoros Or the deere spirit acute Canaidus ( That Aretine ; that most of me belou'd Who in the rich esteeme I prize his soule I terme my selfe ) should these once menace me Or curbe , my humors with well gouern'd check I should with most industrious regard , Obserue abstaine , and curbe my skipping lightnesse But when an arrogant od impudent , A blushles fore-head only out of scence . Of his owne wants , baules in malignant questing At others meanes of wauing gallantry Pipht foutra . Lam.

I faile at none you well squar'd Syneor .

Qua. I can not tell , t is now growne fashion , What s out of railyng 's out of fashion : A man can skarce put on a tuckt vp cap A button'd frizado sute , skarce eate good meate , Anchoues , cauiare , but hee 's Satyred And term'd Phantasticall : by the muddy spawne Of slymie Neughtes , when troth , Phantasticknesse , That which the naturall Sophysters tearme Phantusia incomplexa , is a function Euen of the bright immortal part of man . It is the common passe , the sacred dore , Vnto the priue chamber of the soule That bar'd nought passeth past the baser Court : Of outward scence by it th' inamorate , Most liuely thinkes he sees the absent beauties Of his lou'd mistres . By it we shape a new creation , Of things as yet vnborne , by it wee feede : Our rauenous memory , our intention feast Slid he that s not Phantasticall 's a beast . Lam.

Most Phantasticall protection of Phantasticknesse .

Lau.

Faith t is good .

Qua.

So 't be phantastical t is wits life bloud .

Lau.

Come Sinior my legges are girt .

Qua.

Phantastically .

Lau.

After a spetiall humor a new cut .

Qua. Why then t is , rare , t is excellent . vds fut And I were to be hangd I would bee chokt Phantastically , he can skarce be sau'd That s not phantasticall , I stand ferme to it . La.

Nay then sweete sir giue reason , come on , when .

Qua.

T is hell to runne in common base of men .

Lau.

Hast not runne thy selfe out of breath bulley .

Qua.

And I haue not iaded thy eares more then I haue tierd my tongue , I could runne discourse , put him out of his full pace .

I could poer speech till thou crid'st ho , but troth , I dread a glut , and I confesse much loue To freer gentry whose pert agill spirits Is too much frost-bit numb'd with il straind snibbes Hath tender-reach'd my speech . By Brutus bloud He is a turfe that will be slaue to man . But he 's a beast that dreades his mistresse fanne . Lau. Come all merth and solace , capers , healthes and whiffes To morrow are my nuptialls celebrate : All friends all friends . Lam. I protest — Qua.

Nay leaue protestes , pluck out your snarling phanges . When thou hast meanes be Phantasticall and sociable ; goe to , here s my hand and you want fortie shillings I am your Maecenas though not Atauis Edite regibus .

Lam. Why content and I protest — Qua.

I le no protest .

Lam.

Well and I doe not leaue these fopperies doe not lend me fortie shillings , & ther 's my hand , I imbrace you , loue you , nay adore thee , for by the iuice of worm-woode , thou hast a bitter braine .

Qu.

You Simplicius ? woult leaue that staring fellow Admiration , and Adoration of thy acquaintance wilt . A skorne out t is odious , too eager a defence argues a strong opposition , & to vehement a praise , drawes a suspition of others worthy disparigement .

Set tapers to bright day , it ill befittes Good wines can vent themselues , and not good wittes . Sym. Good truth I loue you , and with the grace of Heauen , I le be very ciuell and — Qua.

Phantasticall .

Sym.

I le be some thing , I haue a conceald humore in me and t were broachd t wold spurty faith .

Qu. Come then Saint Marke lett 's be as light as aire As fresh and iocond as the brest of May : I pree thee thee good French knight good plump cheekt chub Runne some French passage , come le ts see thy vaine , Daunces , sceanes , and songs , royall intertaine . Lau. Petite lacque page , page , Bydet sing Giue it the French ierk , quick spart , lightly , ha , Ha hers a turne vnto my Lucea . Qua. Stand stiffe ho stand , take footing firme stand sure For if thou fall before thy mistres Thy man-hod 's dam'd ; stand firme — ho good , so , so . The Daunce and Song . Lau.

Come now via aloune to Celia .

Qua. Stay take an old rime first though dry and leane T will serue to close the stomake of the Sceane . Lau. This is thy humor to berime vs still , Neuer so slightly pleas'd but out they flie . Qua. They are mine owne , no gleaned Poetry , My fashions knowne , out rime ta kt as you list : A fico , for the sower browd Zoilist . Musick , Tobacco , Sack and Sleepe , The tide of Sorrow backward keepe . If thou art sad at others fate , Riuo drinke deepe giue care the mate , On vs the end of time is come , Fond feare of that we cannot shun , Whilst quickest sence doth freshly last , Clip time aboute , hug pleasure fast . The Sisters rauell out our twine , He that knows littl 's most deuine . Error deludes ; whole beate this hence , Naughte s knowne but by exterior sence , Let glory blason others deede , My bloud then breath craues better meede , Let twattling fame cheatd others rest , I am no dish for Rumors feast . Let honor others hope abuse , I le nothing haue so nought will loose : I le striue to be nor great nor smale , To liue nor die , fate helmeth all , When I can breath no longer then , Heauen take all , there put Amen . How i st , how i st ? Lau.

Faith so , so , telamant , quelamant , as 't please Oppinion to currant it .

Qua. Why then via lett s walke , Lau.

I must giue notice to an od pedant as wee passe of my nuptials , I vse him for he is abscure and shal marry vs in priuate , I haue many enemies but secresie is the best euasion from enuie .

Qua

Holds it to morrow ?

Lau. I firme absolute , Lam.

I le say amen if the Priest be mute .

Qua. Epythalamiums will I singe my chucke , Go on , spend freely , out on drosse t is muck . Exeunt Enter a Schole-maister , draws the curtains behind with , Battus Nows , Slip , Nathaniell and Holifernes Pippo , schole-boyes , sitting with bookes in their hands . All .

Salue Magister .

Ped

Saluete pueri estote salui , vos saluere exopto vobis salutem , Batte my fili , fili mi Batte .

Bat.

Quid vis .

Ped.

Stand forth repeat your lesson without booke .

Bat.

A nowne is the name of a thing that may be seene felt heard or vnderstood .

Ped , Good boy , on on , Bat.

Of nownes some bee substantiues and some bee substantiues .

Ped.

Adiectiues .

Bat.

Adiectiues , a nowne substantiue ether is propper to the thing that it betokneth .

Ped.

Well to numbers .

Battus .

In Nownes bee two numbers , the Singuler and the Plurall , the Singuler number speaketh of one as Lapis a Stone , the Plurall speaketh of more then one , as Lapides stones .

Ped.

Good childe , now thou art past Lapides Stones , proceed to the cases Nous , say you next Nous , wher 's your lesson Nous .

Nous,

I am in a verbe forsooth .

Ped.

Say on for sooth say say .

Nous.

A verbe is a part of speach declined with mood and tence and betokneth doing as Amo I loue ,

Ped.

How many kind of verbes are there ?

Nous. 2. Personall and impersonall , Ped.

Of verbs personalls , how many kinds .

Nou.

Fiue , Actiue Passiue Neuter Deponent and Common . A Verbe Actiue endeth in O and beetokneth to doe as Amo I loue and by putting to R it may bee a passiue as Amor I am loued .

Ped.

Very good child , now learne to know the Deponent and common : Say you slip .

Slip.

Cedant arma togae , concedant lauria linguae .

Ped.

What part of speach is lingua , inflecte , inflecte .

Slip.

Singulariter , nominatiuo Hec lingua .

Ped.

Why is lingua the Feminine gender ?

Slip.

Forsooth because it is the Femenine gender .

Ped.

Ha thou Asse , thou Dolt , Idem per idem , marke it : lingua is declined with Hec the Femenine , because it is a houshold stuffe perticularly belonging , and most commonly resident vnder the roofe of Womens mouthes . Come on you Nathaniell say you , say you next , not too fast , say tretably , say .

Nath.

Mascula dicuntur Monosilaba nomina quedam .

Ped.

Faster , faster .

Nath. Vt , sal , sol , ren & splen : car , ser , vir , vas , vadis , as , mas , Bes , cres , pres & pes , glis , glirens habens genetiuo , Mos , flos , ros & tros , muns , dens , mons , pons . Ped.

Rup , tup , snup , slup , bor , hor , cor , mor: holla , holla , holla , you Holifernes Pippo , put him downe , wipe your Nose : fie on your sleeue , where 's your Muckender your Grand-mother gaue you ? well say on , say on .

Hol.

pree thee Maister what words this ?

Ped.

Asse , Asse .

Hol.

As in presenti perfectum format in , in , in .

Ped.

In what Sir ?

Hol.

Perfectum format in what Sir ?

Ped.

In what Sir in avi ?

Hol. In what Sir in avi . Vt no , nas , naui , vocito , vocitas , voci , voci , voci — Ped.

What 's next ?

Hol.

Voci , What 's next ?

Ped.

Why thou vngratious child , thou simple animall , thou barnacle . Nous snare him , take him vp , and you were my father you should vp .

Hol.

Indeed I am not your Father , O Lord now for God sake ; let mee go out , my mother told a thing , I shall bewray all els . Harke you Maister , my Grand-mother intreates you to come to dinner to morrow morning .

Ped.

I say vntrusse take him vp , Nous , dispatch what not perfect in an Asse in presenty ?

Hol.

In truth I le bee as perfect an Asse in presenty as any of this Company , with the grace of god law , this once , this once , and I do so any more —

Ped.

I say hold him vp .

Hol.

Ha let me say my praiers first . You know not what you ha done now , all the surrup of my braine is runne into my buttockes & yee spill the iuice of my wit well , ha sweete , ha sweete , hunny barbary suger sweete Maister .

Ped.

Sance trickes trifles , delaies , demurrers procrastinations or retardations mount him , mount him .

Enter Quadratus Lampatho Lauerdure and Simplicius . Qua.

Be mercifull my gentle Sinior .

Lau.

Wee le sue his pardon out .

Ped.

He is repriued : and now Appollo blesse your braines Facundius and Elaborate ellegance , make your presence gratious in the eyes of your Mistres .

Lau.

You must along with vs , lend priuate eare .

Sim.

What is your name .

Hol.

Holifernes Pippo .

Sim.

Who gaue you that name . Nay let mee alone for sposing of a scholler .

Hol.

My godfathers and god-mothers in my baptisme .

Sim.

Truly gallants I am inamord on thee boy wilt thou serue me .

Hol.

Yes and please my grand-mother when I come to years of discretion .

Ped

And you haue a propensitude to him , he shall be for you : I was solicited to graunt him leaue to play the Lady in commedies presented by Children , but I knew his voice was to smale and his stature to loe , sing , sing a treble Holifernes ; sing .

The Song .

A very smale sweete voice I le assure you .

Qua.

T is smally sweete indeede .

Sym.

A very pretty Child , hold vp thy head , there , buy thee some plummes .

Qua.

Nay they must play , you go along with vs .

Ped.

Ludendi venia est petita & concessa .

All .

Gratias .

Sym.

Pippo 's my page , how like you him , ha has hee not a good face , ha .

Lau. Exceeding amiable ; come away , I long to see my loue my Celia . Sym.

Carry my rapier hold vp so , good childe , stay gallants vmph a sweete face .

Lam. I relish not this mirth , my spirit is vntwist , My heart is raueld out in discontents , I am deepe thoughtfull , and I shoote my soule Through all creation of omnipotence . Qua. What art melancholy Lampe . I le feede thy humor I le giue thee reason straight to hang thy selfe Mark't mark't : In heauens handiwork their s naught Beleeue it . Lam. In heauens handiwork ther 's naught None more vile , accursed , reprobate to blisse Then man , and mong men a scholler most . Things onely fleshly sencitiue , an Oxe or Horse , They liue and eate , and sleepe , and drinke , and die And are not toucht with recollections Of things ore-past or staggerd infant doubtes Of things succeeding : but leaue the manly beastes , And giue but pence a peece to haue a sight : Of beastly man now . Sym.

What so Lampatho , good truth I will not pay your Ordinary if you come not .

Lam. Dost thou heare that voice . I le make a parrat now , As good a man as hee in foureteene nights I neuer heard him vent a sillable : Of his owne creating since I knew the vse Of eyes and eares ? Well he 's perfect blest , Because a perfect beast . I le gage my heart He knowes no difference essentiall Twixt my dog and him . The horeson sot is blest Is rich in ignorance , makes faire vsance on 't And euery day augments his barbarisme So loue me Calmnes I do enuy him forts . I was a scholler : seauen vse-full springs Did I defloure in quotations Of crossd oppinions bout the soule of man The more I learnt the more I learnt to doubt Knowledge and wit faithes foes , turne fayth about Sim.

Nay come good Sinior , I stay all the gentlemen here , I wood faine giue my prity page a pudding pie .

Lam. Honest Epicure . Nay marke list delight , delight my spaniell slept , whilst I bausd leaues . Tossd ore the dunces por'd on the old print Of titled wordes , and stil my spaniell slept . Whilst I wasted lampoile , bated my flesh Shrunk vp my veines , and still my spaniel slept . And still I held conuerse with Zabarell Aquinas Scotus , and the musty sawe Of antick Donate , still my spaniell slept Still on went I , first an sit anima Then and it were mortall , O hold hold At that they are at braine buffets fell by the eares , A maine pell mell togither , still my spaniell slept . Then whether t were Corporeall , Local , fixt , Extraduce , but whether 't had free will Or no , ho Philosophers Stood banding factions all so strongly propt , I staggerd , knew not which was firmer part . But thought , quoted , reade , obseru'd and pried , Stufft noting bookes , and still my spaniell slept . At length he wakt and yawnd and by yon sky , For aught I know he knew as much as I . Sim.

Dellicat good Lampatho come away . I assure you i le giue but two pence more .

Lam. How , t was created , how the soule exsistes One talkes of motes , the soule was made of motes , An other fire , tother light , a third a spark of Star-like nature Hippo water , Anaximenes ayre , Aristoxenus Musicke ; Critias I know not what , A company of odde phrenetici Did eate my youth , and when I crept abroad , Finding my numnesse in this nimble age , I fell a railing , but now soft and slow , I know , I know naught , but I naught do know , What shall I doe , what plot , what course persew ? Qua. Why turne a Temporist , row with the tide , Pursew the cut , the fashion of the age , Well heer 's my Schollers course , first get a Schoole , And then a ten-pound Cure , keepe both , then buy , ( Stay marry , I marry ) then a farme or so , Serue God and Mammon , to the Diuill goe , Affect some sect , I 't is the sect is it , So thou canst seeme 't is held the pretious wit : And O if thou canst get some higher seate , Where thou maist sell your holy portion , ( Which charitable prouidence ordained In sacred bountie for a blessed vse ) Alien the gleabe , intaile it to thy loines , Intombe it in thy graue Past resurrection to his natiue vse . Now if there be a hell , and such swine sau'd , Heauen take all , that 's all my hopes haue crau'd . Enter Pippo . Pip.

My Simplicias Maister .

Lam.

Your Maister Simplicius .

Pip.

Has come to you to sent .

Lam.

Has sent to me to come .

Pip.

Ha , ha , has bought me a fine dagger , and a Hatte and a Feather , I can say As in presenti now .

Company of Boyes within .

Quadratus Quadratus , away , away .

Lam. We come sweet gallants ; and grumbling hate lye stil And turne Phantastique : he that climbes a hill Must wheele about , the ladder to account Is slie dissemblance , he that meanes to mount , Must lye all leuell in the prospectiue Of eager sighted greatnesse , thou wouldst thriue , The Venice state is young , loose , and vnknit , Can rellish naught but lushious vanities Goe fit his tooth , O glauering flatterie , How potent art thou : front looke briske and sleeke , That such base durt as you should dare to reeke , In Princes nostrils . Well my sceane is long . All within . Quadratus . Qua. I come hotte blouds , those that their state would swell , Must beare a counter-face : the diuell and hell Confound them all , that 's all my prayers exact , So ends our chat , sound Musick for the Act . Exeunt .
ACT. 3.
SCAE. 1. Enter Francisco halfe drest , in his black doublet and round cap , the the rest riche , Iacomo bearing his hatte and feather ? Adrean his doublet and band , Randolfo his cloake and staffe . they cloath Francisco , whilst Bydet creepes in and obserues them . Much of of this done whilst the Acte is playing . Fran.

For God-sake remember to take speciall markes of me , or you will nere be able to know me .

Adri.

Why man ?

Fra.

Why good faith I scarce know my selfe already me thinks I should remember to forget my selfe , now I am so shining braue . Indeed Francisco was alwayes a sweete youth , for I am a Perfumer , but thus braue ? I am an alien to it , would you make mee like the drownd Albano , must I bear 't mainly vp , must I bee hee .

Ran.

What els man ? O what else ?

Iaco. I warrant you giue him but faire riche cloathes , Hee can bee tane , reputed any thing , Apparail 's growne a God and goes more neate , Makes men of ragges , which straight he beares aloft , Like patcht vp scar-Crowes to affright the rout Of the Idolatrous vulgar , that worship Images , Stand aw'd and bare-skalp't at the glosse of silkes , Which like the glorious Aiax of Lincolnes Inne , ( survey with wonder by me when I lay , Factor in London : ) lappes vp naught but filth And excrements , that beare the shape of men , Whose in-side euery day would peck and teare , But that vaine skar-crow cloathes intreates forbeare . Fran, You would haue me take vpon me Albano , A valiant gallant Venetian Burgomasco , Well my beard , my feather , short sword and my oth Shall doo 't feare not . What I know a number By the sole warrant of a Lapy-beard , A raine beate plume , and a good chop filling oth , With an odde French shrugge , and by the Lotd or so , Ha leapt into sweete Captaine with such ease , As you would fea rt not , I le gage my heart I le do 't , How sits my Hat , ha , Iack doth my feather wagge . Iaco. Me thinkes now in the common sence of fashion , Thou shouldst grow proud , and like a fore-horse view , None but before-hand gallants , as for sides And those that ranke in equall file with thee , Studdy a faint salute , giue a strange eye , But as to those in rere-ward O be blind , The world wants eyes , it cannot see behind . Fran. Where is the strumpet , where 's the hot vain'd French , Liues not Albano , hath Celia so forgot , Albanos loue , that she must forth-with wed , A runne-about , a skipping French-man — Iaco.

Now you must grow in heate and stut .

Fran.

An odde phantasma , a beggar , a Sir , a who who who what you will , a straggling go go go gunds , f f f f fut —

Adrian .

Passing like him , passing like him , O 't will strike all dead .

Pan. I am rauished 't will be peerles exquisite , Let him go out instantly . Iaco. O not till twy-light , meane time I le prop vp The tottering Rumor of Albanos skape . And safe arriuall , it begins to spread , If this plot liue Frenchman thy hopes are dead . Exeunt . Bydet.

And if it liue strike of this little head . Exit .

Enter Albano with Slip his Page . Alba.

Can it be ? i st possible ? i st within the bounds of faith ? O vilany .

Slip

The clapper of Rumor strikes on both sides ringing out the French knight is in firme possession of my Misteris your wife .

Alba. I st possible I should be dead so soone ? In her affectes , how long i st since our shipprack ? Slip.

Faith I haue little arithmatique in me , yet I remember the storme made mee cast vp perfectly the whole sum of all I had receiu'd , three daies before I was liquord soundly my guts were rinc'd for the heauens : I looke as pale euer since as if I had tane the diet this spring .

Alba.

But how long i st since our ship-wrack ?

Slip.

Mary since wee were hung by the heeles on the batch of Cycily to make a iayle deliuery of the sea in our mawes t is iust three monthes : shall I speake like a Poet ? Thrice hath the horned mone .

Alba. Talke not of hornes . O Celia how oft ( When thou hast lay'd thy cheeke vppon my breast And with laciuious petulancy sew'd . For Hymeneall dalliance marriage rightes ) O then how oft with passionate protestes And zealous vowes hast thou oblig'd thy loue , In dateles bands vnto Albanos breast ? Then did I but mention second Marriage With what a bitter hate would she inuaigh Gainst retaild wedlockes . O would she lispe If you should die , ( then would she slide a teare , And with a wanton languishment in-twist Her hands ) O God and you should die . Marry ? Could I loue life ; my deare Albano dead Should any Prince possesse his widdowes bed ? And now see , see , I am but rumord drown'd . Slip. Shee le make you Prince , your worship must be crown'd O master you know the woman is the weaker creature , She must haue a prop : the maide is the brittle mettell Her head is quickly crackt : the wife is queasie stomackt She must be fed with nouelties ; but then what s your widdowe , Custome is a second nature , I say no more but think you the rest . Alba. If loue be holy , if that mistery , Of co-vnited hearts be sacrament ? If the vnbounded goodnesse haue infus'd . A sacred ardor if a mutuall loue Into our Species , of those amorous ioyes , Those sweetes of life , those comfortes euen in death Spring from a cause aboue our reasones reach ? If that cleere flame deduce his heate from heauen ? T is like his cause 's eternall alwaies one As is th' instiller of deuinest loue Vnchangd by time immortall mauger death . But O t is growne a figment : loue a iest : A commick Poesie : the soule of man is rotten Euen to the core no sound affection . Our loue is hollow vaulted , stands on proppes , Of circumstance , profit or ambitious hopes . The other tissue Gowne or Chaine of pearle Makes my coy minx to nussell twixt the breastes Of her lull'd husband , tother Carkanet , Deflowres that Ladies bed : one hundred more Marries that loath'd blowze , one ten pound oddes In promis'd ioynture makes the hard palm'd sire , Inforce his daughters tender lippes to start At the sharpe touch of some loath'd stubbed beard , The first pure time the golden age is fled , Heauen knowes I lie t is now the age of gold , For it all marreth and euen virtues sold . Slip.

Master will you trust me and I le .

Alba Yes boy I le trust thee , babes & fooles i le trust But seruants faith , wiues loue , or femalls lust , A vsurer and the diuill sooner . Now were I dead , Me thinkes I see a huff-cap swaggering sir , Pawning my plate , my iewells , morgage ? Nay Selling out right the purchace of my browes , Whilst my poore fatherlesse leane totterd sonne , My gentries reliques , my houses onely prop , Is saw'd a sunder , lyes forlorne , all bleake , Vnto the griefes of sharpe Necessities , Whilst his father in law , his father in Diuell , or d d d d Diuill , f f f father , Or who who who who ; What you will , When is the marriage morne ? Slip.

Euen next rising sonne .

Alba. Good , good , good , go to my brother Adrian , Tell him I le lurck , stay , tell him I le lurck , stay , Now is Albanos marriage bed new hung With fresh rich Curtaines , now are my valence vp , Imbost with orient Pearle , my Gransires gift , Now are the Lawne sheetes fum'd with Vyolets , To fresh the pawld lasciuious appetite , Now worke the Cookes , the pastry sweates with slaues , The March-panes glitter , now now the musitions Houer with nimble stickes ore squeaking crowds , Ticling the dryed guttes of a Mewing Catt ,

The Taylors , Starchers , Semsters , Butchers , Pulterors , Mercers , all , all , all , now now now , none thinke a mee , the f f f French is te f f f fine man , de p p p pock man , de —

Slip.

Peace , peace , stand conceald , yonder by all discriptions is he would be husband of my Mistresse : your wife hah meate hah .

Alba.

Vds so , so , so , soule that s my veluet cloake .

Slip.

O peace , obserue him , hah .

Enter Lauerdure and Bidett talking , Quadratus , Lampatho , Simplicius , Pedante , and Holiternes Pippo . Bidet.

'T is most true Sir , I heard all , I saw all , I tell all , and I hope you beleeue all , the sweete Francisco Soranza , the Perfumer is by your riuall Iacomo , and your two brothers that must be , when you haue married your wife , that shall be .

Peda.

With the grace of Heauen .

Bidett .

Disguis'd so like the drownd Albano to crosse your sute , that by my little honesty 't was great consolation to mee to obserue them , passion of ioy , of hope . O excellent cri'd Andrea , passingly cri'd Randolfo ; vnparraleld lispes Iacomo , good , good , good , sayes Andrea , now stut sayes Iacomo , now stut sayes Randolfo , whilst the rauisht Perfumer had like to haue waterd the seames of his breeches for extreame pride of their applause .

Lau.

Sest , I le to Celia , and mauger the nose of her friends , wedde her : bedde her , my first sonne shall bee a Captaine , and his name shall bee what it please his God-fathers , the second if hee haue a face bad inough , a Lawyer , the third a Marchant , and the fourth if he bee maimd , dull braind , or hard shapt , a scholler , for that s your fashion .

Qua.

Get them , get them man first ; now by the wantonnesse of the night , and I were a wench I would not ha-thee , wert thou an heire , nay ( which is more ) a foole .

Lau.

Why I can rise high , a straight legge , a plumpe thigh , a full vaine , a round cheeke , and when it pleaseth the firtility of my chinne to be deliuered of a beard , 't will not wrong my kissing , for my lippes are rebels , and stand out .

Qua.

Ho but ther 's an old fustie Prouerbe , these great talkers are neuer good dooers .

Lam. Why what a babell arrogance is this ? Men will put by the very stock of fate , They le thwart the destiny of marriage , Striue to disturbe the sway of prouidence , Thei le do it ? Qua.

Come , you le be snarling now .

Lam As if we had free-will in supernaturall Effects , and that our loue or hate Depended not on causes boue the reach Of humaine stature . Qua.

I thinke I shall not lend you forty shillings now .

Lam. Durt vpon durt , feare is beneath my shooe , Dreadlesse of rackes , strappados , or the sword , Mauger Informer and slie intelligence , I le stand as confident as Hercules , And with a frightlesse resolution , Rip vp and launce our times impieties . Sim.

Vds so peace .

Lam. Open a bounteous eare for I le be free , Ample as Heauen , giue my speech more roome , Let me vnbrace my breasts , strip vp my sleeues , Stand like an executioner to vice , To strike his head off with the keener edge , Of my sharpe spirit . Lau.

Roome and good licence , come on , when , when .

Lam. Now is my fury mounted , fix your eyes , Intend your sences , bend your listning vp , For I le make greatnesse quake , I le tawe the hide Of thick-skind Hugenes . Lau.

T is most gratious wee le obserue thee calmely .

Qua.

Hang on thy toungs end , come on pree thee-thee doe .

Lam. I le see you hang'd first , I thanke you Sir , I le none , This is the straine that chokes the theaters : That makes them crack with full stufft audience , This is your humor onely in request Forsooth to raile , this brings your eares to bed , This people gape for , for this some doe stare This some would heare , to crack the Authors neck , This admiration and applause persues , Who cannot raile , my humors chang'd 't is cleare , Pardon I le none , I prise my ioynts more deare . Bidet.

Maister , Maister , I ha discri'd the Perfumer in Albanos disguise , looke you , looke you , rare sport , rare sport .

Alba.

I can containe my impatience no longer , you Mounsieur Cauelere , Saint Dennis , you Caprichious Sir , Sinior Caranto French braule , you that must marry Celia Galanto , is Albano drown'd now ? goe wander , auant Knight , errant Celia shall bee no Cuck-queane , my heire no begger , my plate no pawne , my land no morgage , my wealth no food for thy luxuries , my house no harbour for thy Comrades , my bedde no bootye for thy lustes , my any thing shall bee thy nothing , goe hence packe , packe , auant , caper , caper , aloun , aloun , passe by , passe by , cloake your nose , away , vanish , wander depart , slink by away .

Lau.

Harke you perfumer , tell Iacomo Randulfo , and Adrean , 't will not do , looke you say no more , but 't will not doe .

Alba.

What perfumer ? what Iacomo ?

Qua.

Nay assure thee honest Perfumer good Francisco , wee know all man , goe home to thy Ciuitt Boxe , looke to the profit , commodity or emolument of thy Mus-cats taile , go clap on your round Cap , my what do you lack sir , for yfaith good rogue all s discri'd .

Alba.

What Perfumer ? what Mus-cat ? what Francisco , what do you lack , i st not inough that you kissd my wife ?

Lau

Inough .

Alba.

I inough , and may be , I feare me too much , but you must floute me , deride me , scoffe me , keepe out , touch not my porche , as for my wife —

Lau.

Stirre to the dore : dare to disturbe the match , And by the —

Alba.

My sword : menace Albano fore his owne dores .

Lau.

No not Albano but Francisco , thus , Perfumer , I le make you stinke if you stirre a ; for the rest : well via via . Exeunt Cest. Remanet Albano , Slip. Simp. and Holif .

Alba.

Iesu , Iesu , what intends this ? ha ?

Sim.

O God Sir , you lye as open to my vnderstanding as a Curtizan , I know you as well —

Alba.

Some body knowes me yet , praise heauen some body knowes me yet .

Sim.

Why looke you Sir , I ha paide for my knowing of men and women too in my dayes , I know you are Francisco Soranza the Perfumer , I maugre Sinior Satten I .

Alba.

Do not tempt my patience , go to , doe not .

Sim.

I know you dwell in Saint Markes lane , at the signe of the Mus-cat as well —

Alba.

Foole , or madd , or drunke no more .

Sim.

I know where you were drest , where you were —

Alba.

Nay then take all , take all , take all —

He bastinadoes Simplicius . Simp.

And I tell not my father , if I make you not loose your office of gutter Maister-ship ; and you bee Skauenger next yeare well : Come Holifernes come good Holifernes , come seruant . Exit Sim. Holife .

Enter Iacomo . Alba.

Francisco Soranza and perfumer and muscat , and gutter maister hay , hay , hay , go , go , go , gods f , f , f , fut ; I le to the Duke and I le so ti , ti , ti , ticle them .

Iaco. Pretious , what meanes he to go out so soone , Before the dusk of twilight might deceiue The doubtfull priers . What holla . Alba.

Whop what diuill now ?

Iaco.

I le faine I know him not , what businesse fore those dores .

Alba.

What s that to thee

Iaco. You come to wronge my friend Sir Lauerdure Confesse or — Alba.

My sword boy s , s , s , s , soule my sword .

Iaco.

O my deere roague thou art a rare dissembler .

Alba.

See see .

Enter Adrian and Randolfo . Iaco. Francisco did I not helpe to cloth thee euen now I would has worne thee Albano my good sweete slaue . exit Ia. Alba.

See , see , Iesu , Iesu , impostors , connicatchers , Sancta Maria ?

Ran.

Looke you , he walkes he faines most excellent .

Adri. Accost him first as if you were ignorant Of the deceit . Ran. O deere Albano now thrice happie eyes To view the hope-lesse presence of my brother . Alba. Most loued kinsman praise to Heauen yet , You know Albano , but for yonder slaues — well . Adri.

Successe could not come on more gratious .

Alba. Had not you come ( deare brother Adrian ) I thinke not one would know me . Vlisses dog Had quicker scence then my dul Countrimen , Why none had knowne me . Rand. Doubt you of that ? would I might die , Had I not knowne the guile I would ha sworne Thou hadst bin Albano , my nimble couzning knaue . Alba. Whippe , whippe , Heauen preserue al Saint Marke Saint Marke . Brother Adrian , be frantick pree-thee be Say I am a Perfumer Francisco , hay hay I st not some feast day you are all ranke drunke Rratts ra , ra , ra , rattes knights of the be , be , be , bell , be , be , bell . Adri.

Go go proceede thou dost it rare farewell .

Exeunt Adrian and Randolfo . Alba.

Farwell ? ha ? i st euen so ? boy who am I ?

Slip. My Lord Albano , Alb. By this breast you lie The Samian faith is true , true , I was drown'd And now my soule is skipt into a perfumer a gutter-master . Slip. Beleeue me sir — Alba. No no I le beleeue nothing , no , The disaduantage of all honest hearts Is quick credulity , perfect state pollecy Can crosse-bite euen sence , the worlds turn'd Iuggler , Castes mystes before our eyes Haygh passe re passe I le credit nothing . Slip.

Good Sir .

Alba. Hence asse . Doth not Opinion stamp the currant passe , Of each mans valew , vertue , quality ? Had I ingross'd the choice commodities Of heauens trafike , yet reputed vile I am a rascall ; O deere vnbeleefe , How wealthy dost thou make thy owners wit ? Thou traine of knowledge , what a priuiledge Thou giu'st to thy possessor : anchorst him , From floting with the tide of vulger faith : From being dam'd with multitudes deere vnbeleefe , I am a Perfumer , I , thinkst thou my bloud , My brothers know not right Albano yet ? Away t is faites , if Albanos name , Were liable to scence , that I could tast or touch Or see , or feele it , it might tice beleefe , But since t is voice , and ayre , come to the Muscat boy , Francisco , that s my name t is right , I , I , What do you lack ? what i st you lack right that 's my cry . Exeunt Enter Slip and Noose Trip with the trunchion of a staffe torch , and Doite with a Pantofle , Bidet , Holyfernes following . The Cornets sound . Byd.

Proclaime our titles

Doit.

Bosphoros Cormelydon Honorificacuminos Bydet .

Holyf.

I thinke your Maiesties a Welchman , you haue a horrible long name .

Bydet.

Death or scilence proceed .

Doit.

Honorificacuminos Bidet Emperor of Crackes , Prince of Pages , Marques of Mumchance , and sole regent ouer a bale of false dice , to all his vnder Ministers health , Crownes , Sack , Tobacco , and stockings vncrakt aboue the shooe .

Bydet.

Our selfe will giue them their charge , Now let mee stroake my beard and I had it , & speake wisely if I knew how : most vnconsionable , honest little , or little honest good subiects , informe our person of your seuerall qualities and of the preiudice that is foisted vppon you that our selfe may persew , preuent , and preoccupie the pustulent dangers incident to all your cases .

Doit.

Here is a petition exhibited of the particuler greeuances of each sort of pages .

Bydet.

We will vouchsafe in this our publike session to peruse them , pleaseth your excellent wagship to bee informed that the deuision of pages is tripartite ( tripartite ) or three fold , of pages , some be Court pages , others Ordinary gallants pages , & the third-apple squiers , basket-bearers or pages of the placket , with the last we will proceede first , stand forth page of the placket , what is your mistres ?

Slip.

A kinde of puritane .

Byd.

How liue you ?

Slip.

Miserably complayning to your crack-ship though we haue light Mistresses we are made the Children and seruants of darknes , what prophane vse we are put to , al these gallants more feelingly know then we can liuely expresse , it is to be comiserated and by your royall insight onely to bee preuented that a male Mounkey and the diminutiue of a man should bee Synonima & no scence . Though wee are the drosse of your subiects , yet being a kinde of page , let vs finde your Celsitude kind and respectiue of our time-fortunes and birthes abuse , and so in the name of our whole tribe of emptie basket-bearers , I kisse your little hands .

Bidet.

Your case is dangerous and almost desperat stand forth ordinary gallants page , what is the nature of your Master ?

Noose .

He eates well and right slouenly , and when the dice fauor him goes in good cloathes , and scowers his pinke collour silk stockings : when he hath any mony he beares his crownes , when he hath none I carry his purse , he cheates well , sweares better , but swaggers in a wantons Chamber admirably , hee loues his boy and the rump of a cram'd Capon , and this summer hath a passing thrifty humor to bottle ale : as contemptuous as Lucifer , as arrogant as ignorance can make him , as libidinous as Priapus , hee keepes mee as his adamant to draw mettell after to his lodging , I curle his perriwig , painte his cheekes , perfume his breath , I am his froterer or rubber in a Hot-house , the prop of his lies , the bearer of his fals dice , and yet for all this like the Persian Louse that eates byting , and byting eates , so I say sithing and sithing say my end is to paste vp a Si quis my Masters fortunes are forc'd to cashere me and so six to one I fall to be a Pippin squire . Hic finis priami , this is the end of pick pockets .

Bydet.

Stand forth Court-page , thou lokest pale and wan .

Trip.

Most ridiculous Emperor .

Bydet.

O say no more , I know thy miseryes , what betwixt thy Lady , her Gentlewoman and thy Masters late gaming thou maist looke pale . I know thy miseries and I condole thy calamities , thou art borne well , bred ill , but diest worst of al , thy bloud most commonly gentle , thy youth ordinaryly idle , and thy age to often miserable . When thy first sute is fresh , thy cheekes cleere of Court soiles , and thy Lord falne out with his Lady , so longe may be hee le chuck thee vnder the chin , call thee good pretty ape and giue thee a scrap from his owne trencher , but after he neuer beholds thee , but when thou squierst him with a torch to a wantons sheetes , or lightes his Tobacco pipe . Neuer vseth thee but as his pander neuer , regardeth thee but as an idle bur that stickst vpon the nap of his fortune , and so naked thou camst into the world and naked thou must returne ; whom serue you .

Holy .

A foole .

Bydet.

Thou art my happiest subiect , the seruice of a foole is the onely blessedst slauery that euer put on a chaine and a blew cote , they know not what nor for what they giue , but so they giue t is good , so it be good they giue : fortunes are ordain'd for fooles , as fooles are for fortune , to play with all not to vse , hath hee taken an oth of alleagiance is hee of our brotherhood yet ?

Holy .

Not yet right venerable Honorificac cac cac cacuminos Bidet : but as little an infant as I am I will , and with the grace of wit I will deserue it .

Bydet.

You must performe a valorous Vertuous , and religious exploit first in desert of your order .

Holyf.

What i st ?

Byd.

Couzen thy master , hee is a foole , and was created for men of wit such as thy selfe to make vse of .

Holy .

Such as my selfe . Nay faith for wit I think for my age or so , but on , sir .

Bidet.

That thou maist the easier purge him of superfluous bloud I will discribe thy Maisters constitution , he loues and is beloued of himselfe and one more ; his dog . There is a company of vnbrac'd vntrussd , rutters in the towne , that crinkle in the hammes swearing their flesh is their onely lyuing , and when they haue any crownes , cry god a marcy Mol , and shrugging let the Cockholds pay for t : intimating that their maintenance flowes from the wantonnesse of Merchants wiues , when in troth the plaine troth is , the plaine and the stand , or the plaine stand and deliuer , deliuers them all their lyuing . These comrades haue perswaded thy Maister that ther 's no way to redeeme his peach collour satten sute from pawne but by the loue of a Cytizens wife , hee beleeues it , they flout him he feedes them , and now t is our honest and religious meditation that hee feede vs . Holyfernes Puppi .

Holy .

Pippo and shall please you .

Bydet.

Pippo t is our will and pleasure thou sute thy selfe like a Marchants wife , leaue the managing of the sequence vnto our prudence .

Holy .

Or vnto our Prudence truly shee is a very witty wench and hath a stammell petticote with three gards for the nonce ; but for your Marchants wife alas I am to little , speake to small , go to gingerly , by my troth I feare I shall looke to faire .

Bydet.

Our maiesty dismounteth , and wee put of our greatnesse , and now my little knaues I am plaine Crack , as I am Bosphoros Carmelidon Honorificacuminos Bydet I am imperious : honor sparckles in mine eyes ; but as I am Crack I wil conuay crosbite and cheat vpon Simplicius , I will feed , satiat and fill your panches : replenish , stuff or furnish your purses , wee will laugh when others weepe , sing when others sith , feede when others starue , and be drunke when others are sober , this my charge at the loose , as you loue our brother-hood , auoide true speech square dice , small liquor , and aboue all , those to vngentlemanlike protestations of indeede and verely , and so gentle Appollo touch thy nimble string our sceane is donne yet fore wee cease wee sing . The Song and Exeunt .

ACT. 4.
SCE 1. Enter Celia Meletza Lyzabetta and Lucea . Celia . Faith sister I long to play with a fether , Pree-thee Lucia bring the shuttle-cock . Melet.

Out on him light pated Phantasticke , he 's like one of our gallants at . —

Lyza.

I wonder who thou speak'st well of ?

Mel.

Why of my selfe , for by my troth I know none els wil .

Celia .

Sweet sister Meletza le ts sit in iudgment a little , faith of my seruant Mounsier Lauerdure .

Mel.

Troth well for a seruant , but for a husband ( figh ) I .

Lyza.

Why why ?

Melet.

Why he is not a plaine foole , nor faire , nor fat , nor rich , rich foole . But he is a knight , his honour will giue the passado in the presence to morrow night , I hope he wil deserue : Al I can say is as , as the common fiddlers will say in their God send you well to do .

Ly.

How think'st thou of the amorous Iacomo .

Melet.

Iacomo why on my bare troth .

Celia .

Why bare troth .

Melet.

Because my troth is like his chinne tath no haire on 't ; gods me his face lookes like the head of a taber , but trust me he hath a good wit .

Ly.

Who told you so .

Mel.

One that knowes , one that can tell ?

Celia .

Whos 's that .

Melet.

Him selfe .

Lyz.

Well wench , thou hadst a seruant one Fabius what hast thou done with him .

Melet.

I donne with him ? out of him puppy , by this fether his beard is derectly brick collour , and perfectly fashion'd like the husk of a cheessnut , hee kisses with the driest lip ; figh on him .

Celia .

O but your seruant Quadratus the absolute Courtier .

Melet. Fie , fie , speake no more of him , he liues by begging ? He is a fine Courtier flatters admirable , kisses Faire Madam , smells surpassing sweete , weares And holds vp the arras , supportes the tapistry , When I passe into the presence very gracefully and I assure you . Lucea .

Madam here is your shuttle-cock

Melet.

Sister is not your waighting wench rich ?

Celia .

Why sister why ?

Melet. Because she can flatter : pree-thee call her not , She has 24. houres to Maddam yet ; come you You prate yfaith I le tosse you from post to piller . Celia .

You post and I piller .

Melet.

No , no , you are the onely post , you must support proue a wench and beare , or elce all the building of your delight will fall —

Celia .

Downe .

Lyza.

What must I stand out ?

Melet.

I by my faith til you be married .

Ly.

Why do you tosse then ?

Melet.

Why I am wed wench .

Celea .

Pree thee to whome .

Melet.

To the true husband right head of a woman , my wil , which vowes neuer to marry till I meane to be a foole , a slaue , starch cambrick ruffes , and make candells ( pur ) t is downe serue againe good wench .

Luc.

By your pleasing cheeke you play well .

Melet.

Nay good creature pree doe not flatter mee , I thought t was for somthing you goe casd in your veluit skabberd , I warrant these laces were nere stich'd on with true stich , I haue a plaine waighting wench shee speakes plaine , and faith , she goes plaine , she is vertuous and because she should go like virtue by the consent of my bounty shee shall neuer haue aboue two smockes to her back , for that s the fortune of desert , & the maine in fashion or reward of merit ( pur ) iust thus do I vse my seruants , I striue to catch them in my racket , and no sooner caught but I tosse them away , if he flie wel and haue good feaethers I play with them till he be downe , and then my maide serues him to me againe , if a slug and weake wing'd if hee bee downe there let him lie .

Celea .

Good Mell I wonder how many seruants thou hast .

Melet.

Troth so do I , let me see Dupatzo .

Lyxa.

Dupatzo which Dupatzo .

Melet.

Dupatzo the elder brother the foole , he that bought the half penny rib and wearing it in his eare swearing t was the duches of Millans fauor , hee into whose head a man may trauell 10. leagues before hee can meete with his eyes , then ther 's my chub my Epicure Quadratus , that rubbes his guttes , clappes his paunch & cries Riuo , intertayning my eares perpetually with a most strong discourse of the praise of bottle ale & red Herrings , then ther 's Simplicius Faber .

Ly.

Why he is a foole .

Melet.

True or els he would nere be my seruant , then ther 's the cap cloakt Courtier Baltazar hee weares a double treble quadruple ruffe , I in the sommer time , faith I ha seruants inow and I doubt not but by my ordinary pride and extraordinary cunning to get more . Mounsier Lauerdure with a troupe of gallants is entring .

Lyza. He capers the lasciuious bloud about Within heart pantes , nor leapes the eye nor lippes : Prepare your selues to kisse for you must be kissd . Mel.

By my troth t is a pretty thing to be towards marriage , a pretty louing : looke where he comes ha ha .

Lauer.

Good day sweete loue .

Mel.

Wish her good night man .

Lau.

God morrow sister .

Mel.

A cursie to you caper , to morrow morne I le call you brother .

Lauer.

But much much falls betwixt the cup and lip .

Mel.

Be not to confident the knot may slip .

Qua.

Bounty , blessednes , and the spirit of wine attend my Mistres .

Mel.

Thankes good chub .

Sim.

God yee god morrow heartely mistres , and how do you since last I saw you .

Qua.

Gods mee you must not inquire how shee does , that s priuy counsell , fie , ther 's manners indeed .

Si.

Pray you pardon my inciuility , I was som-what bould with you , but beleeue me I le neuer be so sawcy to aske you how you do againe , as long as I liue la .

Mel.

Square chub , what sullene black is that .

Qua.

A tassell that hangs at my purse strings , hee dogs mee and I giue him scraps and pay for his ordinary , feede him , hee liquors himselfe in the iuice of my bounty , and when hee hath suckt vp strength of spirit he squeaseth it in my owne face , when I haue refind and sharp'd his wits with good food , hee cuts my fingers , and breakes iests vpon me , I beare them , and beate him : but by this light the dull eyed thinks he dos wel , dos very well , and but that hee and I are of two faithes — I fill my belly , and feeds his braine , I could find in my heart to hug him , to hug him .

Melet.

Pree-thee perswade him to assume spirit and salute vs .

Quad.

Lampatho , Lampatho , art out of countenance , for witts sake salute these beauties , how doost like them ?

Lam.

Vds fut , I can liken them to nothing , but great mens great horse vpon great dayes , whose tailes are trust vp in silke and siluer .

Quad.

To them man , salute them .

Lam.

Blesse you faire Ladies , God make you all his seruants .

Melet.

God make you all his seruants .

Qua.

Hee is holpen well had need of you , for bee it spoken without prophanisme hee hath more in this traine , I feare mee you ha more seruants then he , I am sure the Diuill is an Angell of darkenesse .

Lamp .

I but those are Angels of light .

Qua.

Light Angels , pree-thee leaue them , with-draw a little and heare a Sonnet pree-thee , heare a Sonnet .

Lamp .

Made of Albanos widdow that was , and Mounsieur Lauerdures wife that must be .

Qua.

Come leaue his lips and command some liquor , if you haue no Bottle-Ale , command some Claret-wine and Bourrage , for that 's my predominate humor sleeke billid Bacchus , le ts fill thy guttes .

Lamp .

Nay heare it , and rellish it iuditiously .

Qua.

I do rellish it most iuditially . Quad . drinkes .

Lamp .

Adored excellence , delicious sweet .

Qua.

Delicious sweete good , very good .

Lamp .

If thou canst taste the purer iuice of loue .

Qua.

If thou canst taste the purer iuice , good still , good still .

Qua.

I doe rellish it , it tastes sweete .

Lamp .

Is not the metaphor good , i st not well followed ?

Qua.

Passing good , very pleasing .

Lamp .

I st not sweete .

Qua. Let me see 't I le make it sweete , I le soake it in the iuice of Helicon . Bi r Lady , passing sweete , good , passing sweete . Lamp .

You wrong my Muse .

Qua. The Irish flux vpon thy Muse , thy whorish Muse , Heere is no place for her loose brothelry , We will not deale with her , goe , away , away , Lamp . I le be reueng'd . Qua. How pree-thee in a play ? come , come , be sosiable In priuate seuerance from societie , Here leapes a vaine of bloud inflam'd with loue , Mounting to pleasure , all adict to mirth , thou lt read a Satyre or a Sonnet now , Clagging their ayery humor with — Lam. Lamp oyle , watch Candles , Rug-gownes & small iuice , Thin commons , foure a clock rising , I renounce you all , Now may I ternally abandon meat Rust fustie you which most imbrac'd disuse , You a made me an Asse , thus shapt my lot , I am a meere Scholler , that is a meere sot . Qua. Come then Lampe , i le powre fresh Oyle into thee , Apply thy spirit that it may nimbly turne , Vnto the habit , fashion of the age , I le make thee man the Scholler , inable thy behauiour , Apt for the intertaine of any presence : I le turne thee gallant , first thou shalt haue a Mistresse , How is thy spirit rais'd to yonder beauty ? She with the sanguine cheeke , the dimpled chinne , The pretty amorous smile that clips her lips , And dallyes bought her cheeke — Shee with the speaking eye , That castes out beames as ardent as those flakes , Which sing'd the world by rash braind Phaeton , She with the lip , O lips ! she for whose sake , A man could finde in his heart to in-hell himselfe , There 's more Philosophy , more theoremes , More demonstrations , all inuincible , More cleare diuinity drawne on her cheeke , Then in all volumes tedious paraphase , Of musty eld , O who would staggering doubt , The soules eternity , seeing it hath Of heauenly beauty , but to case it vp , Who would distrust a supreame existence , Able to confound when it can create , Such heauen on earth able to intrance , Amaze : O I 't is prouidence , not chance . Lam. Now by the front of Ioue me thinks her eye Shootes more spirit in me , O beautie feminine ! How powerfull art thou , what deepe magick lyes Within the circle of thy speaking eyes . Qua.

Why now could I eate thee , thou doost please mine appetite , I can disist thee , God made thee a good foole , and happy and ignorant , and amarous , and riche and fraile , and a Satyrist , and an Essayest , and sleepy , and proud , and indeed a foole and then thou shalt bee sure of all these . Doe but scorne her shee is thine owne , accost her carelesly , and her eye promiseth shee will be bound to the good abbearing .

Celia .

Now sister Meletza doost marke their craft , some straggling thoughts transport thy attentiuenesse from his discourse , wast Iacomos or our brothers plot ?

Lauer.

Both , both , sweete Lady , my Page heard all , we mette the roague , so like Albano , I beat the roague .

Sim.

I but when you were gone the roague beat me .

Lau.

Now take my counsell , listen .

Melet.

A pretty youth , a pretty well shapt youth , a good leg , a very good eye , a sweete ingenious face , and I warrant a good witte , nay which is more , if hee bee poore I assure my soule hee is chaste and honest , good faith I fancy , I fancie him , I and I may chance , well I le thinke the rest .

Qua.

I say bee carelesse still , court her without complement take spirit .

Lauer. Wert not a pleasing ieast for me to cloath Another rascall like Albano , say And rumor him return'd without all deceit , Would not beget errors most ridiculous . Qua.

Meletza bella belletza , Madonna , bella bella genteletza pree-thee kisse this initiated gallant .

Melet.

How would it please you I should respect yee .

Lamp .

As any thing , What you will as nothing .

Melet.

As nothing , how will you valew my loue .

Lamp .

Why iust as you respect me , as nothing , for out of nothing , nothing is bred , so nothing shall not beget any-thing , any-thing bring nothing , nothing bring any-thing , any-thing & nothing shal be What you will , my speach mounting to the valieu of my selfe which is .

Melet.

What sweete —

Lamp .

Your nothing light as your selfe scencelesse as your sex , and iust as you would ha me , nothing .

Melet.

Your wit skips a morisco , but by the brightest spangle of my tier , I vouchafe you intire vnaffected fauor , were this gentle spirit be not proud .

Beleeue it youth slow speech , swift loue doth often shrowd . Lamp . My soul 's intranc'd your fauor doth transport , My scence past scence , by your adored graces , I doat , am rapt . Melet. Nay if you fall to passion and past scence , My breasts no harbor for your loue , go packe , hence . Qua. Vds fut thou gull , thou inkie scholler , ha , thou whoreson fop , Wilt not thou clappe into our fashion'd gallantry , Couldst not be proud and skornfull , loofe and vaine Gods my hearts obiect , what a plague is this : My soul 's intraunc'd , fut couldst not clip and kisse , My soul 's intraunc'd , ten thousand crownes at least Lost lost , my soul 's intraunc'd , loues life O beast ! Alba.

Celia open , open Celia , I would enter , open Celia .

Fran.

Celia , open , open Celia , I would enter open Celia .

Alba.

What Celia let in thy husband Albano what Celia .

Fran.

What Celia let in thy husband Albano what Celia

Alba.

Vds f , f , f , fut let Albano enter .

Fran.

Vds f , f , f , fut let Albano enter .

Celia .

Sweete breast you ha playd the wag yfaith .

Qua.

Beleeue it sweete not I .

Melet.

Come you haue attired some fiddler like Albano to fright the perfumer , ther 's the iest .

Ran.

Good fortunes to our sister .

Melet.

And a speedy marriage .

Adri.

Then we must wish her no good fortunes .

Iaco.

For shame , for shame straight cleere your house ; sweepe out this dust , fling out this trash , returne to modesty your husband I say your husband Albano that was supposd drownd is return'd I and at the dore .

Celia .

Ha ha , my husband , ha ha .

Adri.

Laugh you , shameles ? laugh you ?

Celia .

Come , come , your plots discouerd , good faith kinsmen I am no skold : to shape a Perfumer like my husband , O sweete iest .

Iaco.

Last hopes all knowne .

Celi

For pennance of your fault will you maintaine a iest now , my loue hath tired some fiddler like Albano , like the Perfumer .

Lau.

Not I by blessednesse not I .

Mel.

Come t is true , do but support the iest and you shal surfet , with laughter .

Iaco. Faith we condiscend , t will not be crosd I see , Marriage and hanging go by destiny . Alba.

B , b , b , bar out Albano , O Adulterous impudent .

Fran.

B , b , b , bar out Albano , O thou matchlesse g , g , g , gigglet .

Enter Albano and Francisco . Qua.

Let them in , let them in , now , now , now obserue , obserue , look , look , look .

Iaco.

That same s a fiddler , shapt like thee , feare naught , bee confident thou shalt know the iest heereafter , be confident ; feare naught , blush not , stand firme .

Alba.

Now brothers , now gallants , now sisters now call a Perfumer a gutter-maister , bar mee my house , beate mee : baffle me , skoffe me , deride mee , ha that I were a young man againe , by the mas I would ha you all by the eares , by the mas law ; I am Francisco Soranza am I not gigglet : strumpet , cutters , swaggerers , brothell haunters , I am Francisco , O god , O slaues , O dogges , dogges , curres .

Iaco.

No sir pray you pardon vs , we confesse you are not Francisco nor a Perfumer , but euen .

Alba.

But euen Albano .

Iaco.

But euen a fiddler , a miniken tickler , a pum , pum .

Fran. A scraper , scraper . Art not asham'd before Albanos face , To clip his spouze , O shamlesse impudent ! Iaco.

Well said perfumer .

Alb.

A fiddler a scraper , a miniken tickler , a pum , a pum , euen now a Perfumer , now a fiddler , I will be euen What you will , do , do do , k , k , k , kisse my wife be , be , be , be , fore .

Qua.

Why would'st haue him kisse her behind ?

Alba.

Before my owne f , f , f , face .

Iaco.

Well done fiddler .

Alba.

I le f , f , fiddle yee .

Fran.

Dost f , f , floute mee .

Alba.

Dost m , m , m , mock me .

Fran.

I le to the Duke I le p , p , p , paste vp infamies on euery post .

Iaco.

T was rarely , rarely done , away , away . Exit Francisco .

Alba.

I le f , f , follow , though I st , st , st , stut , i le stumble to the Duke in p , p , plaine language , I pray you vse my wife well , good faith shee was a kinde soule and an honest woman once , I was her husband and was call'd Albano before I was drown'd , but now after my resurrection I an I know not what indeede brothers , and indeed sisters and in deed wife I am : What you will , do'st thou laugh , dost thou ge , ge , ge , gerne ; a p , p , p , perfumer a fiddler , a Diabalo , matre de Dios , I le f , f , f , firk you by the Lord now , now I will . Exit Albano .

Qua.

Ha ha t is a good roague , a good roague .

Lau.

A good roague ha , I know him not .

Celia .

No good sweete loue come come dissemble not ,

Lau. Nay if you dread nothing happy be my lot Come Via sest , come faire cheekes , come le ts dance , The sweetes of loue is amorous dalliance . Celia . All friends , all happy friends , my vaines are light , Ly.

Thy praiers are now god send it quickly night .

Melet.

And then come morning .

Ly.

I that s the hopefull day .

Mel.

I there thou hitst it .

Qua.

Pray God he hit it .

Lau.

Play .

The Daunce . Iaco.

They say ther 's reuells and a Play at Court .

Lau.

A Play to night ?

Qua.

I t is this gallants wit ,

Iaco.

I st good i st good ?

Lamp .

I feare t will hardly hit .

Qua. I like thy feare , wel , t wil haue better chance , Ther 's naught more hatefull then ranck ignorance . Celia .

Come gallants the table spread will you to dinner ?

Qua.

Yes first a maine at dice and then wee le eate .

Sim.

Truely the best wittes haue the bad'st fortune at dice still .

Qua.

Whole Play , whole play .

Sim.

Not I , in truth I haue still exceeding bad fortune at dice .

Celia . Come shall we in , infayth thou art suddaine sad , Dost feare the shaddow of my long dead Lord . Lauer, Shaddow ha I cannot tel Time tryeth all things well . wel , well . Qua.

Would I were time then , I thought t was for some thing that the old fornicator was bald behinde ; go passe on passe on .

Exeunt .
ACT. 5.
SCAE. 1. The Curtaines are drawne by a Page , and Celia and Lauerdure , Quadratus , and Lyzabetta , Lampatho and Meletza Simplicius , and Lucea displayed sitting at Dinner . The Song is sung , during which a Page whispers with Simplicius . Qua. Feede and be fat my fayre Calipolis , Riuo heer 's good iuice , fresh Burrage boy ? Lam.

I commend , commend my selfe to yee Lady .

Melet.

In troth Sir you dwell farre from neighbours that are inforc'd to commend your selfe .

Qua.

Why Simplicius , whether now man , for good fashions sake stirre not , fit still , sit still .

Sim.

I must needs rise , much good do it you .

Qua.

Doost thou thinke thy rising will do them much good , sit still , sit still , carue me of that good Melletza : fill Bacchus fill .

Sim.

I must needs bee gone , and you le come to my Chamber to morrow morning , I le send you a hundred crownes .

Qua.

In the name of Prosperitie , what tide of happinesse so suddeinly is flou'd vpon thee .

Sim.

I le keepe a horse and foure boyes with grace of fortune now .

Qua.

Now then ifaith get vp and ride .

Sim.

And I do not ? I le thwack a Ierkin till he groane againe with Gold lace : let mee see , what should I desire of God , mary a Cloake linde with rich Taffata , white Sattin sute , and my gilt Rapier from pawne , nay shee shall giue me a Chaine of Pearle that shall pay for all , good boy , good Sinior , good boye , good Sinior .

Qua.

Why now , thou speaketh in the most imbrac'd fashion that our time hugges , no sooner a good fortune , or a fresh sute falles vpon a fellow that would ha beene guld to ha shou'd into your society , but and he met you he fronts you with a faint eye , throwes a squint glaunce ouer a wried shoulder and cryes twixt the teeth , as very parcimonious of breath , good boy , good Sinior , good boy , good Sinior death : I will search the life bloud of your hopes .

Sim.

And a fresh Pearle-colour silke stocking o IIII , I le goe to the halfe crowne ordinary euery meale , I le haue my Iuory boxe of Tobacco , I le conuerse with none but Counts and Courtiers — now good boy , good Sinior , a paire of massie siluer Spurs , to a hatch short sword , and then your imbroderd hanger , and good Sinior .

Qua.

Shut the windowes , darken the roome , fetch whips , the fellow is madde , hee raues , hee raues , talkes idly , lunatique , who procures thy —

Sim.

One that has eate fat Capon , suckt the boild Chicken , & let out his wit with the foole of bounty , one Fabius , i le scorne him , hee goes vpon Fridaies in black satten .

Qua.

Fabius , by this light , a cogging Chetor , he liues on loue of Marchants wiues , hee stands on the base , of maines , hee furnisheth your ordinary , for which he feeds scot-free , keepes faire gold in his purse , to put on vpon maines , by which he liues and keepes a faire boy at his heeles , he is dam'd Fabius .

Sim.

He is a fine man law , and has a good wit for when he list he can go in black Sattin , I and in a cloake lin'd with vnshorne Veluet .

Qua.

By the saluation of humanity he 's more pestilent then the plague of Lice that fell vpon Egipt , thou hast bin knaue if thou credit it , thou art an Asse if thou follow it , & shalt be a perpetual Ideot if thou persue it , renounce the world , the flesh , the Diuell , and thy trust in mens wiues for they wil double with thee , and so I betake my selfe to the sucking of the iuice Capon , my ingle Bottle-ale , & his Gentleman vsher that squiers him red herring , a foole I found thee & a foole I leaue thee , beare record heauen t is against the prouidence of my speach , God boy good Sinior .

Enter Slip Nows , Doite , and Bydet . Exit . Sim.

Ha , ha , ha , God boy good Sinior , what a foole 't is , ha , ha , what an Asse 't is , saue you young Gentlemen , is shee comming , will she meete me , shal 's incounter ha ?

Byd.

You were not lapt in your Mothers smock , you ha not a good cheeke , an inticing eye , a smooth skinne , a well shapt leg , a faire hand , you cannot bring a wench into a fooles parradize for you ?

Sim.

Not I by this garter , I am a foole , a very Ninny I , how call you her ? how call you her ?

Byd.

Call her , you rise on your right side to day marry , call her , her name is Mistresse Perpetuana , shee is not very faire , nor goes extraordinary gay .

Sim.

She has a good skinne ?

Byd.

A good skin ? she is wealthy , her husbands a foole , shee le make you , she weares the breeches : shee le make you .

Sim.

I le keepe two men and they shall be Taylors , they shall make sutes continually , and those shall be cloath of siluer .

Byd.

You may go in beaten pretious Stones euery day , marry I must acquaint you with some obseruances which you must persue most religiously , she has a foole , a naturall foole waights on her , that is indeed her pander to him , at the first you must be bounteous , what-so-ere hee craues , bee it your Hatte , Cloake , Rapier , Purse , or such trifle , giu 't , giu 't , the night will pay all : and to draw all suspect , from persuing her loue for base gaine sake .

Sim.

Giu 't by this light , I le giu 't , wert , gaine , I care not for her Chaine of Pearle , onely her loue ; gaine ? the first thing her bounty shal fetch is my blush colour Satten sute from pawn : gaine ?

Byd.

When you heare one winde a Cornet , shee is comming downe Saint Markes streete , prepare your speech , suck your lippes , lighten your spirits , fresh your bloud , sleeke your cheekes , for now thou shalt be made for euer ( a perpetuall and eternall gull ) Exit Bydet .

Sim.

I shall so rauish her with my court-ship , I haue such variety of discourse , such coppy of phrase to begin , as this ; sweete Lady Vlisses Dog after his Maisters ten yeares trauell , I shall so ticle her , or thus , Pure beauty there is a stone .

Slip.

Two stones man .

Sim.

Called , 't is no matter what ; I ha the eloquence , I am not to seeke I warrant you . The Cornet is winded , Enter Pippo Bydet , Pippo attired like a Merchants wife , and Bydet like a Foole . Sweete Lady Vlisses dog , there 's a stone called — , O Lord what shall I say .

Slip.

Is all your eloquence come to this ?

Sim.

The glorious radient of your glimmering eies , your glittering beauties blind my witt , and dazled my —

Pippo .

I le put on my maske and please you , pray you winke , pray you .

Bidet.

O fine man , my mistresse loues you best , I dreamt you ga me this sword and dagger , I loue your Hatte and Feather , O.

Sim.

Do not crie man , do not crie man , thou shalt ha them I and they were —

Bydet.

O that purse with all the white pence in it , fine man I loue you , giue you the fine red pence soone at night , he , I thanke you where 's the foole now ?

Sim.

He has all my money , I haue to keepe my selfe , and —

Slip.

Poght .

Pippo .

Sir the foole shall lead you to my house , the foole shall not , at night I expect you , till then take this seale of my affection .

Within Qua.

What Simplicius .

Sim.

I come Quadratus , Gentlemen as yet I can but thanke you , but I must bee trusted for my ordinary soone at night , or stay I le — the foole has vnfurnisht mee , but 't will come againe , good boy .

Within , Qua.

What ho Simplicius ?

Sim.

Good boy , good boyes , I come , I come , good boyes , good boyes .

Byd.

The foole shall waight on thee , Now do I merrit to bee yclipped Bosphoros Carmelydon Honorificacuminos Bydett , who who has any square Dice ?

Pippo .

Marry Sir that haue I .

Byd.

Thou shalt loose thy share for it in our purchase .

Pippo .

I pray you now , pray you now .

Byd. Sooner the whissell of a Marriner , Shall sleeke the rough curbes of the Ocean back , Now speake I like my selfe thou shalt loose thy share . Enter Quadratus , Lauerdure and Celia , Simplicius Meletza , Lyzabetta Lucea and Lampatho . Pip.

Ha take all then , ha .

Qua.

Without cloake or hat or rapier sigh ,

Sim.

Gods me , looke yonder , who gaue you these things ?

Byd.

Mistris Perpetuanos foole .

Sim.

Mistris Perpetuanos foole , ha , ha , there lies a iest , Sinior the foole promised me he would not leaue me .

Byd.

I know the foole well , he will sticke to you , dos not vse to for-sake any youth that is inamord on an other mans wife , hee striues to keepe company with a crimson satten sute continually , he loues to be al one with a Critique , a good wit selfe conceited , a hauke bearer , a dogge keeper , and great with the nobility , hee doates vpon a meere scholler an honest flat foole , but aboue all hee is all one with a fellow whose cloake hath a better inside then his out-side , and his body richer lin'd then his braine .

Sim.

Vds so I am cosoned .

Pip.

Pray you maister pardon me , I must loose my share .

Sim.

Giue me my purse againe .

Byd.

You gaue it me and I le keept .

Qua.

Well done my honest crack thou shalt be my ingle for t .

Lau.

He shall keepe all maugre thy beardles chin thy eyes .

Sim.

I may go starue till Midsomer quarter .

Qua.

Foole get thee hence ,

Pip.

I le to schoole againe that I will , I left in Asse in presenti , and I le begin in Asse in presenti and so good night faire gentry .

Exit Pippo . Qua. The triple Ideotts coxcombe crownes thee , Bitter epigrames confound thee . Cucold be when ere thou bride thee , Through euery comick sceane be drawne , Neuer come thy cloathes from pawne . Neuer may thy shame be sheathed , Neuer kisse a wench sweet breathed . Cornets sound . Enter as many Pages with Torches as you can , Randolfo and Adrian , Iacomo bare , the Duke with attendantes . Ran. Seace the Duke approacheth t is almost night , For the Dukes vp , now begins his day Come grace his entrance ; lightes lightes now ginnes our play . Duk. Still these same bauling pipes , sound softer straines Slumber our scence , tut these are vulger straines , Cannot your trembling wiers throw a chaine Of powerfull rapture bout our mazed scence Why is our chaire thus cushion'd tapistry Why is our bed tired with wanton sportes ? Why are we cloath'd in glistring attiers , If common bloudes can heare , can , feele , Can sit as soft , lie as lasciuious Stut all as rich as the greatest Potentate , Soule , and you cannot feast my thristing eares With aught but what the lip of common berth can tast , Take all away your labors idly wast What sport for night . Lam. A Commedy , intitled Temperance . Duk. What sot elects that subiect for the Court , What should dame Temperance do heere , away , The itch on Temperance your morrall play . Qua.

Duke , Prince , royall bloud , thou that hast the best meanes to be damn'd of any Lord in Venice , thou great man , let me kisse thy flesh , I am fat and therefore faithfull , I will do that which few of thy subiects do ; loue thee , but I will neuer do , that which all thy subiects do ; flatter thee , thy humors reall , good , a Commedie ?

No and thy scence would banquit in delightes , Appropriat to the bloud of Emperors ; Peculier to the state of Maiesty , That none can rellish but dilated greatnesse . Vouchafe to vew the structure of a sceane That stands on tragike sollid passion , O that s fit trafick to commerce with birthes : Straind from the mud of base unable braines , Giue them a sceane may force their struggling bloud Rise vp on tiptoe in attention , And fill their intellect with pure elixed wit , O that s for greatnesse apt , for Princes fit . Duke . Darst thou then vndertake to sute our eares , With such rich vestment . Qua. Dare ; yes my Prince I dare , nay more , I will , And I le present a subiect worth thy soule : The honor'd end of Cato Vtican . Duk.

who le personate him .

Qua.

Marry that wil I on suddaine without change .

Duk.

Thou want'st a beard .

Qua.

Tush a beard nere made Cato , though many mens Cato hang onely on their chin .

Suppose this flowre the City vtica , The time the night that prolong'd Catos death : Now being plac'd moung his Philosophers , These first discourse the soules eternity . Iaco.

Cato grantes that I am sure , for he was valiant , and honest , which an Epicure nere was , and a coward neuer will be .

Qua. Then Cato holdes a distinct notion , Of indiuiduall actions after death : This being argu'd his resolue maintaines , A true magnanimous spirit should giue vp durt To durt , and with his owne flesh dead his flesh , Fore chance should force it crouch vnto his foe : To kill ones selfe some I , some hold it no , O these are pointes would intice away ones soule : To breakes indenture of base prentisage , Enter Francisco . And run away from 's boddy in swift thoughts To melt in contemplation lushious sweetes , Now my voluptious Duke i le feede thy scence , Worth his creation : giue me audience . Fran.

My leidge my royall leidge , heare , heare my sute .

Qua.

Now may thy breath nere smell sweete as long as thy loungs can pant for breaking my speech , thou Muscouite , thou stinking perfumer .

Enter Albano . Duke .

Is not this Albano our some times Courtier ?

Fran.

No troth but Francisco your alwaies perfumer .

Alba.

Lorenzo Celso our braue Venice Duke , Albano Belletzo , thy Merchant , thy soldier , thy Courtier , thy slaue , thy any-thing , thy What thou wilt , kisseth thy noble bloud , doe mee right or els I am canonized a cuckold , canonized a cuckold , I am abus'd , I am abusd , my wifes abusd , my cloathes abusd , my shape , my house my all abusd , I am sworne out of my selfe , beated out of my selfe baffled , geird at , laught at , bard my owne house , debard my owne wife , whilst others swill my wines , gurmandize my meat , meat , kisse my wife , O gods , O gods , O gods , O gods , O gods .

Lauer.

Who i st ? who i st ?

Celia .

Come sweete this is your waggery yfaith , as if you knew him not .

La.

Yes I feare I do too wel , would I could slide away invisible .

Duke .

Assured this is hee .

Iaco. My worthy leidge the iest comes only thus . Now to stop and crosse it with mere like deceite : All being knowne the French knight hath disguisd , A fiddler like Albano too , to fright the perfumer , this is all . Duke .

Art sure t is true .

Melet.

T is confest t is right .

Alba.

It is right , t is true , right , I am a fiddler , a fiddler , a fidler vds fut a fidler ; I le not beleeue thee thou art a woman , and t is knowne veritas non querit angulos , truth seekes not to lurke vnder varthingalls , veritas non querit angulos , a fidler ?

Lau.

Worthy sir pardon , and permit me first to confesse your selfe , your deputation dead hath made my loue liue , to offend you .

Alba.

I , mock on , skoffe on , flout on , do do do .

Lau.

Troth sir in serious .

Alba. I good , good , come hether Celia , Burst breast , riue heart a sunder ? Celia Why startest thou back : seest thou this Celia O me how often with lasciuious touch thy lip , Hath kissd this mark ? how oft this much wrong'd breast Hath borne the gentle waight of thy soft cheeke ? Celia .

O me my deerest Lord , my sweete , sweete loue .

Alba. What a fidler , a fidler ? now thy loue . I am sure thou skornst ; it nay Celia , I could tell What on the night before I went to sea , And tooke my leaue with Hymeneall rights What , thou lispsd Into my eare , a fidler and perfumer now . Adri. And — Ran.

Deere brother .

Iaco. Most respected Sinior , Beleeue it by the sacred end of loue , What much , much wronge hath forc'd your patience Proceeded from most deere affied loue , Deuoted to your house . Adri.

Beleeue it brother .

Iaco.

Nay your selfe when you shall heare the occurrances will say t is happy , commicall .

Ran.

Assure thee brother .

Alba.

Shall I be braue , shall I be my selfe now , loue , giue me thy loue , brothers giue me your breasts , French knight reach me thy hand , perfumer thy fist . Duke I inuite thee , loue I forgiue thee : Frenchman I hug thee , I le know all , i le pardon all , and I le laugh at all .

Qua. And i le curse you all . O yee ha interrupt a sceane . Duke . Quadratus we will heare these pointes discussd , With apter and more calme affected houres . Qua.

Well , good , good .

Alba Wast euen so yfaith why then caprichious mirth , Skip light moriscoes in our frolick bloud , Flaggd veines , sweete , plump with fresh infused ioyes : Laughter pucker our cheekes , make shoulders shog , With chucking lightnesse , loue once more thy lippes , For euer claspe our hands , our hearts , our Creasts , Thus front , thus eyes , thus cheeke , thus all shall meete . Shall clip , shall hug , shall kisse , my deere , deere sweete , Duke wilt thou see me reuell , come loue daunce , Court gallants court ; suck amorous dalliance . Lam.

Beauty your heart .

Melet. First sir accept my hands . Shee leapes too rash , that falls in suddeine bands . Lam.

Shall I dispaire ? neuer will I loue more .

Melet.

No sea so boundles vast but hath a shore .

Qua. Why marry me . Thou canst haue but soft flesh , good bloud , sound bones . And that which fils vp all your bracks , good stones . Lyzabet. Stones , Trees and beasts in loue still firmer prooue , Then man , I le none no hold-fastes in your loues . Lau. Since not the Mistresse , come on Faith the maide : Alba.

Ten thousand Duckets too to bote are laide .

Lau.

Why then winde Cornets , lead on iolly ladde .

Alla. Excuse me gallants though my legges lead wrong . 'T is my first footing , winde out nimble tongue . Duke . 'T is well , 't is well , how shall we spend this night ? Qua. Gulpe Rhenish Wine my liedge , let our paunch rent , Suck merry Gellyes , preuiew but not preuent No mortall can the miseries of life . Alba. I home inuite you all , come sweete , sweete wife , My liedge vouchsafe thy presence , drinke till the ground looke blew , boy . Qua. Liue still springing hopes , still in fresh new ioyes , May your loues happy hit in faire cheekt wiues , Your flesh still plumpe with sap'd restoratiues , That 's all my honest frolick heart can wish , A Fico for the mew and Enuious pish , Till night , I wish good food and pleasing day ,

But then found rest so ends or slight writ play . Exeunt .

Deo op: max gratias .
FINIS .
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palseid touch of od Phantasmatas ? No let the feeble palsied lamer ioynts , Leane on opinions crutches lers Come , let passe , let passe , lets see what stuffe must cloath our eares : ,It knowledge , striue not to be ouer-wise , , It drew distruction into Paradise , Hate Honor soppish , euery ballad-monger , Can cry his idle foppish humor Hate riches , wealthes a flattering mamord Who might not Celia haue ? The passionate inamord Iacomo . mamord The passionate inamord Iacomo . Courttil breakes a iest , ha , heele raile against the Court til the gallants — O God he is very Nectar sineus els , I protest I will straine my vtmost sinues , in strengthning your pretious estimate Autypathy grinning spight Shall a free-borne that holdes Antypathy . folace Come all merth and solace , capers , healthes and whiffes To morrow with out Stand forth repeat your lesson without booke . arthere How many kind of verbes are there ? retarations , delaies , demurrers procrastinations or retardations mount him , mount him . a long Nay they must play , you go along with vs . Persumer Francisco was alwayes a sweete youth , for I am a Perfumer , but thus braue ? I am an alien to it , would-feart into sweete Captaine with such ease , As you would feart not , Ile gage my heart Ile do't , Speties A sacred ardor if a mutuall loue Into our Species , of those amorous ioyes , Those sweetes peruew that is foisted vppon you that our selfe may persew , preuent , and preoccupie the pustulent creale existence , Able to confound when it can create , Such heauen on earth able to intrance figh Without cloake or hat or rapier sigh , thrifting Potentate , Soule , and you cannot feast my thristing eares With aught but what the lip of common Veince the best meanes to be damn'd of any Lord in Venice , thou great man , let me kisse thy flesh vnble with birthes : Straind from the mud of base unable braines , Giue them a sceane may force their 〈◊〉 Gulpe Rhenish Wine my liedge ▪ let our paunch rent ▪ Suck 〈◊〉 Gulpe Rhenish Wine my liedge ▪ let our paunch rent ▪ Suck merry Gellyes , preuiew but not preuent 〈◊〉 Deo op : max gratias .