The skilfull mountebanke. Or, Come, and I'le cure you It hath not so much power as patience, yet 'tis a playster for all sores. By Ioannes Baptista Guardano Lodovico puncto. A Frenchified Italian, and borne in Bucklersberry. Joannes Baptista Guardano Lodovico puncto. This text is an enriched version of the TCP digital transcription A07857 of text S110069 in the English Short Title Catalog (STC 18229). Textual changes and metadata enrichments aim at making the text more computationally tractable, easier to read, and suitable for network-based collaborative curation by amateur and professional end users from many walks of life. The text has been tokenized and linguistically annotated with MorphAdorner. The annotation includes standard spellings that support the display of a text in a standardized format that preserves archaic forms ('loveth', 'seekest'). Textual changes aim at restoring the text the author or stationer meant to publish. This text has not been fully proofread Approx. 12 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 8 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. EarlyPrint Project Evanston,IL, Notre Dame, IN, St. Louis, MO 2018 A07857 STC 18229 ESTC S110069 99845686 99845686 10602 2240897896

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 Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 2, no. A07857) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 10602) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1475-1640 ; 967:03) The skilfull mountebanke. Or, Come, and I'le cure you It hath not so much power as patience, yet 'tis a playster for all sores. By Ioannes Baptista Guardano Lodovico puncto. A Frenchified Italian, and borne in Bucklersberry. Joannes Baptista Guardano Lodovico puncto. [16] p. Printed by I[ohn] O[kes] for Thomas Lambert and are to bee sold at his shop neere the hospitall gate in Smithfield, at the signe of the Horse-shooe, London : 1638. Joannes Baptista Guardano Lodovico puncto is a pseudonym. Partly in verse. Printer's name from STC. Signatures: A. The first leaf is blank. Reproduction of a photostat of the original in the Henry E. Huntington Library and Art Gallery. eng England -- Social life and customs -- Early works to 1800. eebo The skilfull mountebanke. Or, Come, and I'le cure you. It hath not so much power as patience, yet 'tis a playster for all sores. By Ioannes Baptista G Joannes Baptista Guardano Lodovico puncto 1638 16 2189 7 0 0 0 0 0 31.98 C The rate of 31.98 defects per 10,000 words puts this text in the C category of texts with between 10 and 35 defects per 10,000 words. 2009-06 Assigned for keying and markup 2009-07 Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2009-08 Sampled and proofread 2009-08 Text and markup reviewed and edited 2009-09 Batch review (QC) and XML conversion

The Skilfull Mountebanke . OR , Come , and I 'le cure you .

It hath not so much power as Patience , yet 't is a Playster for all Sores .

By Ioannes Baptista Guardano Lodovico puncto .

A Frenchified Italian , and borne in Backlersberry .

LONDON : Printed by I.O. for Thomas Lambert and are to bee sold at his Shop neere the Hospitall gate in Smithfield . at the Signe of the Horse-shooe , 1638.

The Names of the Cures . 1. A Cure for Melancholy . 2. A Cure for a maidens Timpany . 3. A Cure for the Green Sicknesse . 4. A Cure for the Falling Sicknesse in mans estate . 5. A Cure for Cuckolds .
The Skilfull Mountebanke .
If any man be troubled with Melancholy , let him take this following Medicine .

IF his Melancholy procéede by Love , the passion is somewhat dangerous , and difficult to cure ; the things that must bee compounded for the Remedy , are hard to come by .

The Medicine .

TAke the Iuyce of thrée well mads ( and as well told ) Iests , applying them to the Patients spléene , that they may as it were tickle him ; if he begin to laugh , there is some signe of Health : let him bee then forthwith carryed to a warme Bed , which must bee carefully made by a perfect Virgin of five and Thirty yéeres of Age , but very beautifull , and one whose Lip no man did ever touch since shee was five yeeres old . When the aforesaid Bed is made , let this aforesaid Virgin be caus'd to be put into it ; but let mee tell you one thing by the way , you must leave them so ; 't is not a Rush matter for watching by him with a Rush-candle , he will be well enough by Morning , I le warrant , if he can sweate upon 't . But before hee rises , you must provide this Cordiall for him : The stones of a Goate , the guts of Crabs , the braines of Sparrow● , Monkies marrow , Pith of Oxen , with the yelkes of five new layd Egges , layd by an Henne of the Game : all these compounded together , if he may have the continuall company of his Virgin had fellow , will in one halfe yeere drive his Melancholy quite from him ; if not , he is not a man of this World : Therefore wee 'le speake no more of him , but proceede to the next discase .

If any Mayden bee sicke of a Timpany , let her repaire to my Medicine , which is here set downe .

IF this Virgin bee so sicke of Cupid , that the Disease is come to a Timpany , let her with all spéede possible remoove her selfe to some old Midwifes house for Forty Weekes , where there is change of Ayre , keeping a spare Dyet as shee travailes , and alwayes after using lawfull exercises . till shee be married : Then if she have any more Wit than ever any of her Sexe had , which is , to keepe her owne Counsell , shee is past all danger : withall shee must have a great care , that the Tympany which shee left behinde her , come not in her Husbands sight , least it breede a worse Disease : And so much for a Lympany .

A Cure for the Greene-Sicknesse .

IF any Virgin have made so little use of her Time ▪ that she is punished with a disease call'd the Greene s●cknesse , so that her colour beginnes to fade , and her flesh is cover'd with a yellownesse , let her take my counsell : First of all , let her forsake the former dyet she us'd , which was to feede upon Sea coale Cyndars , Ashes , Chalke , and Oate-meale ; loame wall , and parch'd Pease , Beanes , and dry Bisket ; for unlesse these causes be taken away , it is almost impossible that any Medicine should worke upon her : then let her Father or Mother ( if she have any ) provide for her a man of courage , full of mettall and very active : let her parley with him a little , if hee can take my counsell , hée shall quickly convert her pale colour to Red , and her Melancholy to laughter , 't is not amisse , ( if they can agrée together ) if the Banes of Matrimony be ask'd betwixt them , shee 'le bee the fitter to receive her Cure , and hee to play the Physitian ; but if the Maide b● very farre gone , so that shee requires present helpe , let the Banes alone , ●●ee'le goe a neerer way to worke : A Licence may be had , and 't is a 〈◊〉 walke to Pancridge ; if these Rules be● observed , and if shee bee of a mild nature , not froward , cholericke , and hastie , but is contented to lye with him every Night without a Fée , in Forty Weekes the Greene Sicknesse may bee converted to a chopping Boy , or a bouncing Girle , which will keepe her I le warrant her , from ever having it againe : So much for the Greene sicknesse .

If any mans Estate be troubled with the Falling Sicknesse , let him hearken to mee .

WHen a man doth first begin to be sicke of this Disease , there there be a couple more that doe attend upon his body , which if they fasten , will hardly bee got off , and they are these : The one is called a Serjeant , the other a Yeoman , two such dangerous Diseases , that if hee be once but Encounter'd by them , hee is like to lye by it .

This Falling Sicknesse in a mans estate is very hard to cure , yet if it be let runne , 't is tenne to one but that it comes to a worse Disease , which is called a Rupture , but in plaine English a Broke ; which is a Disease , that if it have leave , will have such power over him , that all the wisest Glaziers in London shall scarre sodder him agen . And to say Truth , his hopes must bee , that hee may have a faire winde for Ireland , or else the Disease will perish him : but if hee take my counsell , it shall never come to this : therefore marke my Advice ; if hee be a Shop-keeper , let him keepe him to his Shop , kéepe trusty Servants and true Prentises , and let him avoyde the dangerous exercise of Ducking , lest hee come home agen sing'd like a Fire , Drake ; 't is a very ill signe of his thriving : Let him deale with honest men , and have a care his name be not to much us'd in other mens Bookes ; let his faire Tongue and his faire dealing bée ioyn'd together , to invite good Customers , and a figge for the Falling Sicknesse .

If any marryed man bee troubled with a a paine in the Fore-head , let him looke out , for I have a Medicine for him .

When a man is troubled with this Disease , 't is a horrible signe that hee hath marryed a light Wife , and that being the greatest cause of his Disease , it must ( for ought I sée ) bée taken away from him before the Cure can bée perfected , which ( I must confesse ) is ; somewhat hard to performe ; for they are grievances that will most commonly hang upon a man till they are even ready to hang themselves , and that 's more than a point next the worst : Therefore the best counsell I can give him , is this ; let him eate , drinke , and be merry ; let him not shew himselfe sad and melancholly in company , lest he give his Ieering enemies too much advantage o're him : yet hee 's thus happy , he shall be sure to be Ieer'd by none but the brethren of his owne company , and then hee may cry Cuckolds all arow , and make them mad that first thought to make him so : let him but make much of their wives , and kisse their children , the world wil rather thinke him a politick Whoremaster , than a patient Cuckold , the defamation of the one ▪ will controule the reproach of the other ; and whereas he was before pittied for a wrong'd man , in this pittifull manner : 'T was great pitty an honest carefull man should have so ill a wife : They will say then , Let him alone , for I le warrant , hee 'le give her as good as shee brings . This is a report in this Age , more pleasing to a man than the shamefull name of Cuckold : and when two Combatants wound each other equally , neither of them can boast the glory of the Battell : This is the surest way for his Cure I thinke , and the surest way to breake the heart of his wife ; for wee are to beleeve , the first cause that made her so light heel'd , was to bee reveng'd upon him for some petty quarrell betwixt them , because he would not let her sée such a Puppit-play , or some such petty businesse ; perhaps he would not make her a Gowne of such a new Stuffe as she defir'd , but he breaking the necke of her revenge in this manner , 't is very possible that shee may very shortly and her daies in Melancholy like a direct envious person , destroying her selfe because she cannot kill another .

And if you think this Medicine wil procure Your ease , you are welcome to the Cuckolds Curo . But if these doe your patience wrong , Hearke , and I 'le cure you with a Song .
The Song . ARe any Pooles that would be wise ? Are any falling that would rise ? Is any rich that would be poore , I le purge his substance in an houre : Is any bound that would be free ? I le do 't , let him repaire to me . I come to cure what ere you feele Within , without , from head to heele . Are any of their strength beguil'd , They cannot get their wives with childe ? If they be barren , they shall see I le fit them with a remedy , If once I take them in my hands , They soon shal have more heirs then lands . Then come to me what ere you feele Within , without , from head to heele . If any Usurer would have A preservation 'gainst the grave , Let him not yoke him to a Wife , I le promise him a longer life : But if he marry , ten to one I le lay , he can be cur'd by none . Yet come , I le cure what ere you feels Within , without , from head to heele . If any Lady would be proud , That with no vertues is endow'd . I le puffe her with one praise or other , Shall make her nicer than her Mother : Such mighty power has my calling , But not to keep● her pride from falling . Then come to me what ere you feele Within , without , from head to heele . If any Landrosse be afraid That she shall lose the name of Maide , Yet not be married , let her be Rid of that feare , and come to me ; I le run the hazzard of a curse , She shall grow better , or else worse . Come then to me what ere you feele Within , without , from head to heele . Hath any got a night disease , So that he cannot sleepe for fleas ? Is any sorrowfull or sad , Disguised , Lunaticke , or mad ? Does any cutpurse lye and linger In torment for an itching finger ? He shall be cur'd by my expressions . If he avoyd the quarter Sessions . Then come to me what ere you feele Within , without , from head to heele .
FINIS .