Visions, or Hels kingdome, and the worlds follies and abuses, strangely displaied by R.C. of the Inner Temple Gent. Being the first fruits of a reformed life

VISIONS , OR , HELS KINGDOME , And the Worlds Follies and Abuses ,

Strangely displaied by R. C. of the Inner Temple Gent.

Being the first fruits of a reformed life .

Longè vadit , qui nunquam redit .

LONDON , Printed by E. G. for Simon Burton at his Shop next the Mitre Taverne , within Algate , 1640.

TO THE RIGHT WORSHIPFULL Sr. Thomas Metham , OF Metham in the County of Yorke Knight .

Richard Croshawe dedicates these his first Fruits , as the reall intentions of a reformed life .

To the Students Of the Innes of Court .

GEentlemen , Matter is better than words . If you bee noble , worthy , and ingenuous , these many precipitations I here discover , need no other effect than honest pity : but if these endowments of the minde bee excluded , either by the rashnesse of Youth ( an ill Tutour ) ; or by violent prodigality and licentiousnesse , ( a worse Disciple ) ; My desire is , that my serious lightnesse , may arrow-like pierce your Consciences , to an unfained repentance . The more you are contristate , the lesse will be your sorrow ; for to lament , is here to rejoyce : and such joy I wish may be accumulated on you , and on all those , that either love goodnesse , or are estranged from it . The reason why I present this Booke in chiefe to you ( after the interessed Dedication ) is , because being my selfe , of one of your Societies , my observation and experiment hath made mee conjecture , that these two should never bee unwelcome , Advice and Delight . The first whereof , if my Booke doe not instruct , yet mine owne deviation ( still knowne to many ) may , seeing there is no stability in bubbling pleasure , nor no true content without a religious returne ; so you have both precept and example . And as for the latter , it is better wisht than described . Reade and judge .

The Honourer of your vertues , Richard Croshaw .

To the Reader .

REader , I am no Libeller , what is here written , is written for thy instruction , and not to detract from any mans worth . For I ingenuously protest , there is not any one in particular living , that I intend either by this or that : what I have done was for mine owne recreation , and had not beene now published , but by entreaty . Excuse therefore the errours in it , since they proceed from him that is full of errour ; and if thou meanest to live contentedly , learne to live well ; so shalt thou finde , that Hell is here onely described , that thou maist avoid it ; and the way set downe of the Damned , to shew thee the path of Paradise .

Richard Croshawe .

The severall Visions . 1. The Possessed Sergeant . 2. Death and her Dominion . 3. The last Iudgement . 4. The Foole Amorous . 5. The World in its Interior . 6. Hell .

Errata .

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VISIONS . The first Vision : OR , The Possessed Sergeant .

VArious and inconstant is the life of Man : sometimes lifted up with the height of prosperity , where hee not onely sees , but enjoyes all the pleasures of the world . And by and by cast downe into the gulph of misery , where hee findes such bitter fruits in the punishment of his ill governed wayes , that there remaines not so much as a taste or relish of his fomer felicity . Thus hath God weighed out these two conditions , that none should presume there is any reall happinesse but in him onely , nor any obscure adversity , but by repentance may bring us unto him . Such Meditations as these , was I mastered by , in a remote and farre Countrey : when I could not choose but fall into a serious contemplation of mine owne vanity ; heartily desiring , that I might finde out some way , whereby I might lessen those calamities , which by custome were almost growne hereditary . Night grew on , and sleepe seeing mee utterly destitute , became herselfe a Friend ; and in slumber made mee conceive I was an Actor in this Vision .

Methought .

Curiosity that stirres up all men to things rare and new , invited mee one Morning to behold the severall imbellishments of a famous Monastery ; whither I was no sooner come , but I found the doore shut , and beganne in my selfe to censure the peoples devotion , who to that houre of day had neglected pious duties . Yet least opinion might deceive me , I enquired of one that stood at the Porch , what the reason might bee , of that unaccustomed privacy ? who telling me that the religious men had excluded all others , that they themselves might better endeavour to expell the spirit out of one possessed , encreased my desire to gaine admission : which I had no sooner ruminated on , but I espied one of the same Covent , with whom I had formerly gained some acquaintance , and to whom with some earnestnesse I manifested the obligements I should owe him , if hee would admit mee a sight so unfrequent . As Curtesie generally exceeds in all of that Brotherhood , so in him it found a seat of eminency , who staying not to dispute , or by feigned complements to declare the difficulty , made signes with a pleasing gesture , that I should follow him ; and with a Key , which hee tooke from his Girdle , opening a private Doore , granted my request before hee promised it . But when I was got in , I could not tell whether with more safety , I should postulate a dismission backe , or resolve to stay , so full of horrour was the Object . In the Chancell on the floore lay a man of a most hideous aspect , his apparell torne , hands bound , eyes staring , mouth extended , and feet chained to the Raile about the Altar : sometimes starting up , and againe voluntarily flinging himselfe to the ground , yelling , shriking , and howling , as if the universall doom of punishment for sinne had been laid on him onely . This and the feare I was strucken in , made mee partaker of his unexpressible torture , and to cry out , O Lord ! what is this ? The Exorcist a holy Father , that was diligent about him , made answer , It was a man possest with an evill spirit , and had hardly spoke , but the Tormentour tooke the word . The Conjurer , said hee , lyes ; this is not a Man possest by a Devill , but a Devill possest by a Man . Discoursers take heed what you speake , for in questions and answers , you rather bewray your ignorance , than knowledge . Understand that wee Devils are not ( as I am now ) in the Bodies of Sergeants , but by constraint , and against our wils ; and therefore if you will name mee as you ought , you must say that I am a Devill Sergeantiz'd , and not a Sergeant Diaboliz'd : which you may easily credit by this , because all men speed better with us than with them , since wee flie the Crosse , ( fixt on the top of the Mace , ) but they make use of it as an instrument whereby to doe mischiefe . And though I must confesse there is a great correspondency betweene their Offices and ours , in that they procure other mens hurt , as well as wee ; and as wee desire there may bee none but wicked and guilty men in the World , so doe they also : Yet theirs is with a most eager greedinesse , pricked forward through an hellish disposition , and an avaritious desire of gaine ; but ours onely for company sake . And in this also they are more to be blamed than we , because their evill turnes to the destruction of their owne sexe and kinde , which wee abhorre . For wee are Angels though deprived of Grace , and had never beene converted into Devils , had wee not stroven to bee equall with God . But Sergeants turne Sergeants to be the vilest of men , and greatly delight in the miserable confusion of others ; so that you all strive in vaine to present comfort to this Wretch , since there is no man so godly , that stayes not in his tallons if he once can catch him , and they and wee may well bee both of an Order , were it not that they are Devils cloathed and shod , but we naked and bare-footed , ( as you are , ) leading an hard life in Hell .

Though we were all transported with wonder to heare these Diabolicall speeches , yet did they not at all hinder the Frier from continuing his Exorcismes ; who hoping to still the Spirit , cast holy Water on him : but that was rather a motive to further tattle . Thinke not , said hee , your blessing of Water can make it available , I tell you it rather hurts than benefits , there being nothing that Sergeants hate more than it . For men have so often revenged themselves in this kinde , in heat flinging them into Rivers , to coole their appetite : in cold , into Privy bathes , to warme their malice , that it is growne abominable to them : who cannot any way bee accounted good Christians , because both their Office and Name is derived from Moores and Barbarians , Nations that never made a Conscience of any thing .

Wound not your selves by beleefe , ( said the religious man to the assembly ) the Devill was ever a lyar , and if wee suffer him , will raile and murmur against Justice her selfe ; because by correcting the world , and chastising vice , she snatches away many Soules from him , which otherwise would have been ensnared . Dotard ( said the inmate ) dispute not with me , for I know more than thou dost ; but if thou wilt doe mee a pleasure indeed , banish mee this Sergeants body : for I am a Devill of quality , and when I returne to Hell shall be soundly swaggerd at , for haunting so bad a Companion . Through the compassion I have of those bitter torments thou makest him suffer , by Gods grace , ( said the Divine ) I will doe it , and not for the foolish words thou speakest . Wherefore dost thou so much afflict him ? Can I doe lesse ? ( answered he ) when at this very instant , his spirit is contending with mine , who should be the greater Devill , he or I.

The Fraternity regarded not his malicious answers , but I whose feare , beganne to bee lesse , and inquisitivenesse more , tooke great delight to heare him prattle . And turning to the reverend man , desired , that ( if possible so much licence might be given to a stranger ) he would partly hinder the poore mans endurement , and permit mee to demand some few questions of the intruder ; which it might bee would not onely benefit my selfe , but accrue to the good of some of mine owne Countrimen , if at any time I should make them familiar with the passages . This was no sooner spoke , and condiscended to , but the Spirit forcing the Body to looke upon mee , and laughing at me , began . We have Kindred and friends ( said hee ) both in Court and City ; when there are Poets , they doe us many good offices , by the Trade of Venery and Macquerellage . And though their wits can clothe their fancies in a higher straine than you doe , yet you all , tending ro the same center , and embracing the same science , are bound to give your attendance to maintaine the honour of those of your Profession , whom wee suffer in Hell . Are there any Poets in Hell , said I ? Yes many , ( replied hee , ) the way is so easie , and they doe so swarme , that wee must bee faine to enlarge their abode , and there is nothing in the world so delightfull as to see a Poet in the first year of his freshmanship there , who most commonly brings letters of favor , directed to our superior Magistrates , thinking to finde Charon , Cerberus , Rhadamant , Eacus , and Minos .

But what paines doe they suffer ( said I , feeling my selfe galled ? ) Many ( replied hee ) and those such as are proper to the Trade . Some are tormented in hearing the workes of others rehearsed , ( the punishment also of Musitians ) which they envy , yet cannot mend . There are some of a thousand yeares continuance in Hell , and yet have not made an end of reading the stanza's they composed of incontinency . Others that rubbe the palmes of their hands , scratch their foreheads , beate their browes , and teare their haire , and yet cannot resolve whether is most proper , disaffected or unaffected , depainted or unpainted , because the word comes from painting . There are others , that seeking out a consonancy , as it were blindfolded , walke raving to and fro , biting their nailes and eating their band-strings , till they fall into holes and pits , from whence wee have a great deale of trouble to plucke them out . But those that endure most , and are worst entreated are Comicke Poets , justly punished for making a rape upon the honour of so many Queenes , Princesses , and great persons in England , by their unequall matches of them ; and in their Playes for displaying so many invectives against men of esteeme . With these of the land , water Poets are not planted , but because they have used so many inventions , fictions , and lyes , to coozen the World , and get money , are put among Proctours and Solicitours , as amongst people that live by that exercise : for you must understand , that as there is great conveniency , so there is very good order kept in Hell . The other day there came thronging to us of all sorts ; hee that first enterd , was a conceited fellow , a Drawer , one that by devising patternes for wastcoates , &c. got no small favour ; whom when we thought to quarter with Projectours , wee remember that hee said , besides his draught hee could counterfeit to the life , therefore hee was setled with Scriveners and Attournyes , as among them that can draw and counterfeit upon all occasions . Another called himselfe a Cutter ; he was asked whether of Stone or Marble ? but saying hee was of their kinde who cut off mens purses , and at Masques Ladies shirts , wee put him with detractours and evill speakers , as amongst those that rend the garments of anothers good fame . Blinde men that thought to shrowd themselves among Poets , were thrust among Lovers , because of the sympathy . And Vintners with Waterbearers , because of the mixture . Fooles were chamberd up with Astrologers and Alchymists . Murderers with Physitians . Ill dealing Tradesmen with Iudas . Evill Magistrates and Ministers with the bad Thiefe . Citizens with Shufflers . And Brokers with Jewes . And to conclude , there is not any Common-wealth so well ordered as Hell , where every one hath a retirement according to his quality .

I thinke you spoke of Lovers , ( said I ) and because I am as well sensible of that infirmity as of Poetry , I would willingly know if there bee many ? Love being a great spot of Oyle which spreads all abroad , ( added hee ) thou needest not doubt but Hell is well throngd with the amorous . There are of divers sorts . Some that are Lovers of themselves , others of their money , others of their speeches , others of their workes , and some of their wives , and of that kinde there are very few , because women are of such malignant natures , that by their disloyalty , imperfections , and searching wits , they give every day new subject to their Husbands to repent of their conjunction and alliance with them . All Lovers are delightfull to see , and full of mirth , if there may bee said to bee any in Hell . Some you would take for a Millaners shop , they are so deckt with points , knots , and ribbens , of all sorts , which they call favours . Others for a periwigge makers stall , they are so hung with bracelets , amulets , and lockes of all haires and all colours . You would take some for Messengers to a great City , laden with packets and Epistles to and from their Mistresses ; which they call Love-letters , but we Inflamers , because they serve to inflame and burne the bearers . And others for Jesters , the posture of their wooing is so ridiculous , who once loved , but never obtained . These are condemned for short shooting , yet wonne the game ; and those for kisses that never betrayed . Under them , in a dirty and stifling hole , carpeted with beasts hornes , were those that you call Cuckolds ; Creatures that at the first beganne to bustle with us , objecting a double injury , if they should now againe bee punisht , that in the world had already received disgrace sufficient : the Horne grafted upon their forehead , being first taken from the Devils owne brow , who in the shape of a man made the first Cuckold . But when wee told them that the Divell never wore Hornes , but that they were derived from the Goat and Ramme , emblems of mans libidinousnesse , and the name of Cuckold from the Cuckoe , a bird that having plundered the issue of an innocent , maketh her hatch her viperous brood , or else from mens owne indulgence and womens impudence ; they became the most peaceable of all our pensionaries , and are armed with incomparable patience : for having beene heeretofore strengthened and fortified in the unfaithfull dealings of their wicked wives , they are never angry at any thing that is done unto them . In which respect , and our owne pity , wee have advanced them into one of our fairest upper lodgings : and in their Dungeon have placed such as are lovers of age and old women , who are strongly chained ; for Divels themselves doe not hold their honour safe , amongst people whose taste is so depraved .

But having satisfied your curiosity , I must tell you that wee Divels are much offended , in that you mortals so slovenly besmeare and disfigure us . Sometimes painting us with clawes and tallons , yet are wee neither . Eagles nor Griffins . Then gluing tailes to our posteriours , as if wee needed flie-flappes , or the world should mistake us for Hernes . And then parching on our chinnes , wenny , and welky beards , to metamorphose us into Turky-cocks and Cocks combs ; yet there bee Divels amongst us that may well bee taken for Scholars and Philosophers . But you had best mend this , if you covet a good fire when you come to visit us . Wee asked the other day that Painter whom you call Michael Angelo ( though improperly ) why he presented us in his judgement with so many beasts hooves , deformed bodies , wry neckes , and crabbed faces ? His answer was , That having never seene any of our Tribe , and not crediting there were any , he had made that piece after his owne fancy , and not out of any ends of malice . But ignorance did not excuse his sinne , for hee now findes the reality of that , hee would not before beleeve . We complaine also , that in your familiar discourse one with another , you give us unnecessary presents . Behold ( sayes one ) how this Divell Tailor hath abused mee , How hee makes mee wait , How he hath stolne from me ; Would hee were in Hell ! You doe us a great deale of wrong to wish them there , or to make such comparisons ; For wee never suffer them to come nigh us but with a great deale of intreaty : because they doe already alleage the name of inheritance , in that Custome is a second Law . And having taken possession of Theft , oftner keeping Stuffes demanded of them , than Sabbaths commanded ; they enter grumbling and muttering when we doe not open the backedoore , and thereby acknowledge them legitimate Children . The Divell take it and thee , sayes another to him and those things that displease him ; keepe your gifts at home , for of this kinde there come more than wee fetch , neither doe wee take all that are given ; for wee make a conscience of some things : and would not accept of the forward Letcher when he sayes , I would I might be damned to lie with such a Beauty , but that hee does enforce us . You bestow likewise on the Divell every roguish Page and Foot-boy ; but hee will have none of them , for know ( that for the most part ) they are more wicked than Divels themselves . Also you give to the Divell an Italian , but the Devill thankes you with all his heart , yet loves not to bee undermined . An Englishman , but hee will have none of their new fashions . A Spaniard , but hee that knowes the tyranny they use in making themselves masters of Townes , when once they are permitted entrance ; detests their cruelty . And a Frenchman , but the Divels stomacke will not serve him , because they are already parboyld ; and therefore intreats you to send them to the Great T●rk● to season , and make Eunuchs .

Here the Spirit became silent ; when hearing a noise behinde mee , made by one who had crept in , and was thrusting to get foremost , I turned about to see who durst bee so uncivill in a place so sacred . And perceived it to bee a certaine Informer , that had been the cause of the undoing of one of my deare associates . Therefore that I might a little vindicate my Friend , I againe questioned the possessour . Seeing so many men of divers conditions inhabit your clime , Are there none there of those Horse-leeches , those plagues to Kingdomes , Projectours , & c ? You are cunning , ( said hee ) Know you not that these Vermin are the naturall heires to damnation , and have their patrimony assigned in perpetuall darkenesse ; yet know also that wee are upon the point to discard them , for they are growne unthankfull , beginne to scuffle with us ▪ and would willingly lay a Tribute upon the wayes to Hell , but because the charge encreases dayly , and wee beleeve that in processe of time the taxe will mount so high , that our Agents on Earth will be constrained to forsake their Commerce , ( a thing very prejudiciall to our Common-wealth ) wee will from henceforth shut our Gates and utterly exclude them . In doing so you may be injurious , ( said I ) for then they will aime at Heaven . Never feare that , ( proceeded hee ) for that is a traffique they never delighted in . But , I pray you , on whom will they raise these new impositions ? If you labour to know all the circumstances , ( answered hee ) bid that fellow draw nigh that stands there ( pointing to my Gentleman ) for hee is of the occupation . At this the Company presently cast their eyes upon him , whereat hee was so ashamed , that turning his backe , and plucking his hat over his eyes , hee slunke away , leaving the by-standers astonished , and me revenged . And when the tumult was appeased , the Divell continuing said , Is my Champion absent ? I care not greatly , if I supply his place . Understand then , that the Monopolies they would now finde out , and the Imposts they would impose and set forward are upon jewels , rings , plate , and precious stones , upon lace , handkerchers , dressings , gorgets , and the nice attire of women , upon coaches that serve for no other purpose but to hurry men to Tavernes , Theaters , and the assignations of love . Upon excesse of apparell , feasts , and stately moveables . Upon Play-houses , the schooles of blasphemy and obscenesse . And generally upon all other things whatsoever , that serve to enhance the pride of the world , and encrease our Empire ; which will become utterly desolate , unlesse some good Magistrate , and our Friend , oppose himselfe against them . Not so , ( I persisted by way of interruption ) In this mee thinkes they are very reasonable , seeing that the toleration of such things serve onely to pervert good manners , corrupt chastity , stirre up riot and prodigality , and utterly ruinate modesty and vertue . But concerning Magistrates of whom thou beginnest to speake , Can it bee possible that there are any Judges in Hell ? A fine question ( replied the Divell ) Friend , a wicked Judge is the seed that fructifies most for us : 't is a Graine from which we every yeare receive a thousand Doctours , ten thousand Proctours . Advocates , and Lawyers ; and more than twenty thousand Marshals and Pettifoggers ; so that many times when the yeares are fruitfull in cheating and deceit , wee have not Garners enough to containe the fruit that comes unto us by the meanes of corrupt Judges .

Wilt thou then inferre that there is no Justice upon Earth ? Yes , ( said hee ) if the story of Astrea bee true , didst thou ever heare it ? No , Hearken then , ( said the Fiend ) and I will tell it . Truth and Justice on a time came together to inhabite the Earth , but found none to entertaine them ; because one ( which was Truth ) was naked , and the other severe . In the end after they had wandered up and downe , like vagabonds without shelter , Truth was enforced to dwell with one that was dumbe , and Justice seeing her selfe unregarded , and that her name was usurped by Tyrants , resolved to returne : yet that shee might leave no way unessayed , shee retired from Courts , Palaces , and Cities , and travelled into the Countrey , where in Cottages and Villages shee rested a while under the simplicity and integrity of the poore inhabitants ; from whence Envy ( that never left to persecute her ) remov'd her also . Then went she to Gentlemens houses ; but being never bred up to lie , when they demanded who shee was , answering , I am Iustice ; they drove her from them too , saying , we know not what that is . So that being generally refused , shee fled or rather flew up to Heaven , scarce leaving behind so much as the trace of her footsteps . Since when , men remembring her name , attribute that kind of Scepter or Mace unto her , which hath a crosse at the top ; which although it have got the title , yet sometimes burnes the Basis , because that many times through the abuse of it , it helpeth better to steale , than the hookes , false keyes , and ladders of Theeves . For humane covetousnesse is growne to that height , that all have converted the faculties of their mindes and senses , into instruments to commit theft . The Lover , doth hee not steale a Virgins honour , with her owne consent ? The Lawyer , doth he not steale his Clients goods , with his knowledge , when hee perverts the sense of the Law ? The Comedian , doth he not steal his Spectators heart , when hearkning unto the Verses hee hath conn'd , hee looses time . The Amorous , doth hee not steale with his eyes ? The Eloquent with his tongue ? The powerfull with his armes ? The valiant , with his hands ? The Musician , with his voyce and fingers ? The Dancer , with his feet ? The Physician , with death ? The Apothecary , with health and sickenesse ? The Chirurgion , with blood ? The Astrologer with Heaven ? and there is no man but steales one way or other , but most of all the Sergeant ; who contrary to all these , steales away both his Soule and body by wilfull relinquishment ; for hee forsakes them with his eyes , flies from them with his feet , and disavowes them with his tongue . And they are most of them so wicked , that wee say of them , as you of the Pestilence , Good Lord deliver us .

I wonder ( said I to the Intruder ) that thou hast not reckoned Women among Theeves , knowing they are of the same mystery ? Alas ! Speake not of Women , let them alone , I pray you , ( said hee ) for wee are so pestered , weary , and troubled with them , that wee desire not their remembrance , but to speake truth , if there were not so many in Hell , that would bee none of the worst habitation , especially for Winter . Oh , how much they would give to bee Widowes ! Since the death of that Witch M●dusa , they doe nothing but invent snares , labyrinths , ambuscadoes , and I doubt not but in time will wage warre with us for supremacy of knowledge . All the good that is in them , is , that in our conversations they aske no toyes and new fangles ( as they doe of you ) for they know wee deale not in small wares .

Of what sort have you most , of beautifull or deformed ? Wee have tenne times more of fowle , ( said hee ) For though the faire meet easily with Gallants that satisfie their burning desires , yet it sometimes happens , that by continuance of sin they become sated and repent : but the fowle wanting this libidinous felicity , ( unlesse they can purchase it ) and maligning others , enter so lanke and dried up , that they affright us : for the most part of them are all old , and die grunting like Sowes , mad that the young ones survive them . I became packehorse the other day to one of threescore and ten , that I tooke doing a certaine exercise against obstructions , whom when I had unloden , shee beganne to complaine of the toothach , to infuse conjecture there were some yet left , that shee might appeare lesse odious .

All my demands are untwisted , but this ; I pray you tell mee if there bee any poore in Hell ? What doe you meane by poore said the Devill ? I call him poore that possesseth nothing . How understandest thou that , said he ? How ? Wouldst thou have him condemned that holds nothing of the World , when none are damned but such as covet and enjoy it ? Those men that thou speakest of , are not enrolled in our bookes . And wonder not at it , for all things are wanting to them , yea the Divels themselves . You are rather Divels one towards another , than Divels are Divels to you . For can there bee a more notorious Divell than a Flatterer ? an envious man ? a false friend ? a bad Companion ? an unmercifull Creditour ? or a sonne , brother , or kinsman , that wishes you dead to get your wealth ? that seemes to weepe and bemoane you when you are sicke , and yet cares not if the Divell had you ? All this is wanting to the poore man , hee is not flatterd , envied , hath no friend , no companion , nor no credit , neither are his children , brethren , or alliance de irous of his dissolution , for any obscure ends , but hee is one that lives well , and dies better . And there are some so contented with this manner of life , that they will not change their condition with Kings ; because they have liberty to goe every where , whither they will , in peace and warre , free from all charges , impositions , and publike services , exempt from all judgements , civill censures , processe of Law , and jurisdiction , and in their Consciences are wholly uncorrupted . Moreover , they take no care for the morrow , observing in that the commandement of God . They husband their time well , and can justly value the dayes of their pilgrimage , in setting before their eyes that death holds in his power all that is past , governes all that is present , and pretends a right to all that is to come . But there is a proverbe , that When the Devill preaches , the World drawes to an end .

Wee may truly say that Gods hand is in this , said the religious Conjurer . Thou art the Father of lyes , yet declarest truths , able to mollifie an heart of stone . You men , said the Devill , doe not imagine that this that I have spoken is for your salvation , deceive not your selves , 't is that your paines may be encreased , when the time com● that you shal suffer : and that you may not pretend ignorance , and excuse , saying , No body hath told us . You are all Hypocrites . The greatest part of teares you shed , proceed onely out of griefe to forsake the world , and not out of any repentance for your sinnes . And though sin be sometimes displeasing to you , because of your declining into yeares , or of your corporall indispositions , yet your will hath much a doe to bee overcome , because it is wicked . Thou art an Impostour , said the reverend man . There are at this day many holy Soules , whose teares have issue from another fountaine ; but I see thou seekest to delude us , and it may be it is not the will of God , that thou shouldest bee expelled this miserable body ; neverthelesse I conjure thee by his Almighty Power , not to torment him any more , but to depart .

The Spirit obeyed , and the devout man addressing his speech to us , Gentlemen ( said he ) although it was the Devill that spoke by the organs of this unhappy man , yet there is some pro it in this discourse to be made by him , that will meditate upon it . Therefore I pray you not to regard from whence these things proceed , but to remember that wee often receive health from the hands of our enemies , and from tho● that most hate us . With draw your selves in the Name of God , to whom I will pray , that this sad and prodigious spectacle may serve to amend your lives , and convert you unto him . And heere my Slumber left me .

VISIONS . The second Vision : OR , Death and her Dominion .

SAad thoughts are naturall to abject men , and gather together in multitudes to assault one unhappy . Certaine Enemies they are , uncertaine Friends , not much to be blamed , since they doe not derogate from the straine of the world , fickle , and unstable ; now rising , now declining , and set , before they attaine the Meridian . Cogitations of this mold made me lament mine owne depression , and turne over the leaves of some few bookes , that by no Rhetoricke could maintaine any more than one way to bee borne , but without study could finde a thousand wayes to die . Heere I found the ambition of the proud , and the covetousnesse of the rich , satisfied with so little , that I began to hate all indirect dealings , and minde the advice was given mee . Mortall ( said one ) Why dost thou afflict thy selfe , and labour for uncertaine riches ? Is not Death the end of all things ? which many times comes upon thee before they are obtained , or at best well disposed : embrace that , by dying well , and thou canst not wish for those blessings shall bee denied . Wherefore dost thou so much feare Death , ( said another ) ? What now remaines of the pleasures of thy passed life , and of thy first yeares , which were so sweet and delightfull ? Seest thou not that all is vanished , and lost in times swiftnesse ? Prepare thy selfe therefore , and take heart , put on alacrity of spirit , and settle thy Soule in peace and tranquillity . Remember ( saith the Scripture ) Man that is borne of a Woman is of short dayes , and full of trouble , hee commeth forth like a flower , and is cut downe , he fleeth also as a shadow , and continueth not .

Dizzied with these Contemplations , I fell asleepe over my Instructours and doe verily beleeve , it was rather caused by some supernaturall predominancy , than naturall disposition ; because my faculties , were free and at liberty from outward molestations , and busied in beholding this following Comedy , to which my fancy serv'd as a Stage for unusuall Actours .

I saw divers Physitians enter , riding on large foot-clothes , ominous in this , that they resembled Hearses for the dead . Their traine was broken and disordered , for some went a foot-pace , and others on the spurre . Their faces were contracted , got more by custome than age , in often frowning on their Patients urine , which prognosticated to the Sicke , more terrour than redresse . And these were followed by young Practitients , who by their frequent conversation with the Horses , more than with the Doctours became easily graduated .

Apothecaries came next , armed with morters , pestles , and doses , whose out-side bore the ascribed cures , and inside poysons . Their Shops were the Physicians Storehouse , and the afflicteds Purgatory . Their Recipes began with receive , but included to take , an ounce for themselves , and a scruple for the dying man . And all their compositions were disguised with such strange nominations , as if they had beene Sorcery : cursed inquisitours against life , done in policy , that their mistake of one thing for another , might not bee discerned .

Chirurgions with some unwillingnesse followed , because they conceited precedency ; the Etymology of their name signifying , a Physitian that worketh by hand . Their pockets were filled with pincers , cauters , files , sawes , knives ▪ and lancets ; and their cries of , cut , teare , dismember , burne , infused such feare , that my bones were consulting how they might serve as sheathes to hide one another .

Then Mountebankes ( whose papers speake better than they ) who with more impudence and lesse skill , would cure all Diseases with one Antidote , upon which there was no great disspute . Nor of the Barbers Surgery , ( who came next ) because it either killes or heales . These were more finicall than their forerunners , yet at proudest are but shavers of Excrements . Their greatest Artillery were Cizzers , Razers , and basons , and some sharpe lotions , the which were allayed , by the delicious musicke of their Fiddles and Citternes .

Seeing them followed by men wearing chaines crosse their breasts , and admiring what state they usherd ; I easily lost that conjecture , when I beheld the linkes to be teeth , and the bearers Tooth-drawers ; mouth-devasters , and drawers on of old age : not shaming to wish all mens teeth upon their thread , rather than in the place of their birth .

After these came men of divers habits , not unfitly entred , because all great talkers . Some were called Swimmers , by reason that in speaking they spread their armes to and fro , as if they were swimming . Others imitatours , in that they counterfeited the lookes and gestures of those they spoke of . And others sowers of dissention , because they moved their eyes this way and that way ( not stirring the head ) to marke by stealth the actions of those they meant to betray .

And last of all Dissemblers , a presumptuous Generation , the worlds true plague ; who thrust into all assemblies , and either by craft , flattery , or base submission , having got the secrets of men , convert them to the Relaters prejudice , and their owne mercenary profit . These were called the extract of all the importunate , and because the poyson of Serpents lies in the taile , came in the reere as most poysonous .

Upon this , I beganne to consider , to what use , this great troope and confusion might tend : when behold a certaine Apparition drew neare , that seemed to bee of the Feminine kinde , of light gate and loose proportion . Shee was laden with crownes , garlands , scepters , sikles , sheephookes , buskins , wooden shooes , tires , miters , bonnets , embroidery , silke , skinnes , wooll ▪ gold , lead , diamonds , shels , pearle , and flint . One of her eyes was shut , and the other open . She was cloathed in all colours , on one side appearing young , and on the other old . Now going apace , and anon slowly , at one time seeming afarre off , and by and by at hand And at all times so inconstant , that I could not have leasure to fancy who shee might bee . Yet was I not frighted , but rather incited to laughter , remembring an Italian Comedy I had lately seene , in which Halequin faining to come from the other World , had a baggage not much dissonant ; and therefore , after I had stood a great while musing , I stept to her , and demanded who shee was ? I am Death , said shee . Death ! ( replied I , my heart failing mee ) and whither goe you Mistresse Death ? I come to fetch thee ( said she ) . Alas ! Must I then die ? No , but thou must goe alive with mee , and make a journey into the kingdome of the dead ; for since many departed have rose to see the living , it is no injustice that one living should descend to visit them , and that the dead bee heard . Hast thou not heard that I have power to execute my soveraigne decrees ? Disrobe and follow mee . Ha , sighed I , in a cold sweat , Will you not let me weare my Cloathes ? There is no need , ( said she ) apparel will but hinder you , besides I ease all men of their luggage , that they may walke with more agility . There was no contending , therefore I went after her ; but to tell you through what by-wayes shee led mee is impossible , for I was transported beyond apprehension . As wee were going , I doe not , ( said I ) for all this , see by any outward appearance that you are Death , because she is painted without flesh , consisting of nothing but dry bones . Those Image-makers are fooles , answered shee , and want invention ; for bones are not Death , but the remainder of the Living . You Mortals know her not , or else shee would appeare in the visages of every one of you , and in every severall member lie depicted . To die , is to finish life , and to bee borne , is to beginne to die ; and the truest Image of Death is a mans owne selfe , and not a breathlesse trunke or bare anatomy .

But I pray you , Why doe you place Detractours , and Tell-tales , in the Van next to your owne person ? because ( said shee ) there are more that die by the importunity of great speakers , than by diseases , and more that are hastened to ruine by the conversation of flatterers and intermedlers , than by Physicians practice : though in the generall these are my greatest friends , and best servants , and to this purpose thou must understand , that most in the world grow sicke through excesse and superfluity of humours ; but die , by the meanes and diligence of him that administers . So that when you are asked of what Disease such an one is dead , you must not answer , Of a Feaver , Plurisie , Purple , or Pestilence , but he is dead by the hand of such a Physitian that hath beene well paid , for it is requisite that every Trade should live .

As we grew thus familiar , wee entred into a Vault , where the dayes reflexe was betwixt light and obscurity . In the entry whereof , upon one side I saw three Statues armed and stirring , of humane shape , yet hard to bee distinguished , and on the other an hideous Monster , that continually fought with them , one against three , and three to one . Knowest thou , said Death , what these are ? Oh no! said I , and I trust in God I never shall . And yet so it is , said shee , that since thy Nativity thou hast never kept other Company . These are the three capitall Enemies to the Soule , the World , the Flesh , and the Divell : looke if they doe not resemble one another so neare , that they are scarcely discerned asunder ; so that if thou entertaine but one of them , thou maist bee assured thou hast them all three . An aspiring man , thinkes he hath all the World , and hath got the Divell ; a lascivious man beleeves hee hath the Flesh , but findes it the Divell ; and so doe the rest . But what is shee ( said I ) with so many severall faces , that fights against them ? Answer was made , The Divell Money ; who hath bred a controversie , upholding , that the rest have nothing to doe where she is , and that shee alone is all the three . First , shee grounds her dispute with the World , upon those Proverbes men ordinarily use , that There is no other World but Money , that Hee that hath no Money had better be out of the World , that We banish him the World from whom wee take Money , and that All things give place to Money . Against the second Enemy , she saith , Money is the Flesh , witnesse Whores and Curtezans . And against the third , she makes use of your speeches also , that Nothing can be done without that Divell Money , that Love doth much , but Money doth all , and that , That which Money cannot doe the Devill cannot effect . Whatsoever the claime is , said I , The Devill Money needs no coadjutours , seeing she defends her Cause so well .

Wee went forward to a place where on one hand I perceived Hell , and on the other Judgement , and did heedfully consider Hell , because it was a thing very strange . What lookest thou on , said Death ? On Hell , said I , and methinkes by the aspect , I have seene it elsewhere . Where , ( said she ) ? I have seene it in the emulation of great ones , in the consciences of them that withhold ●nother mans goods , in wicked undertakings , in revenges , in the desires of the luxurious , and in the pride of corporations . But as for Justice , I am glad to see it in its purity , and had rather have Death with Judgement , than Life without it .

At last wee descended into a spacious Cave , circled in on all sides with very high Rampiers , and filled with much people : and here Death bad mee stay , for this was the place of her Tribunall . The hangings that adorned the walles were words of Woe , alas , griefe , sighes , ill tidings , and lamentations , as certainely , beleeved , as unregarded . Here Womens teares were deceitfull to themselves , and unprevalent with others . There sorrow was excluded from comfort , and cares were only vigilant , being converted into Vermin to gnaw Kings and Princes , whose usurped honours made them to suspect all men . He ere Envy had put on a mourning habit , and kept a continued fast , it being not in her power to hurt . And there Ingratitude was kneading a kinde of Dough , mixt of Pride and Ambition , of which now shee framed Men , now Devils . All quivered with curses and imprecations , of which demanding the reason ? one that was by answered , O Destiny ! would you not have curses heere , where there are so many match-makers , Lawyers , and imprecatours ? Doe you not know that there is nothing more frequently spoken of in your Region , than Cursed be hee that married us , Cursed the houre I first beheld thee , and Ill h●p betide him that first brought us together . Cursed bee the Lawyer who counselled mee to follow this Cause that hath undone mee . And in other matters , Curst that I am , I would I might never come into Heaven , if I said this or that ; and The Devill take mee , if ever hee spake to mee of any such thing . But what is all this to the purpose , said I ? and what have these to doe with Deaths Judgement Hall ? Ignorant man ! said the other , If there were not so many contrivers of weddings , would there bee so many dead and desperate men ? Is there any thing destroyes so quickly , as the cavils and circumventions of entangling Lawyers ? And doth there any d● sooner , than hee that precipitates himselfe ? No certainly , therefore thou must conclude that these are the principall Pillars of this Dominion , and of the imperiall throne thou seest there .

At this , I lift up mine eyes , and saw Death sit in a chaire , environed with many little Deaths , as The Death of Love , the Death of Hunger , the Death of Feare , and the Death of Laughter , each bearing a severall Ensigne and device The Death of Love had very little braines , and for Attendants had Pyramus and Thisbe , Hero and Leander , with divers other Lovers , ready to expire under her Sickle , but by the rare miracles of the interessed rose againe . About The Death of Hunger were many Usurers , who having accumulated great wealth , deprive themselves of necessary meanes ; letting their bodies famish and their soules die , which they had long before converted into Gold and Silver . The Death of Feare was richest , and most stately , hemm'd in with Tyrants and mighty men ; such as flie from all , thought none pursueth , and afford the world no good , but this , that by their sudden selfe destruction through feare , suspition , and distrust , they revenge themselves the innocent , whom they had before condemned and slaine . The Death of Laughter was the last , rounded with people of quicke apprehension , but late repentance , that live , as if there were no Justice to feare , and die , as if there were no mercy to bee hoped . And these are they , that when it is said , Restore what you have taken , answer , You make me die of Laughter . Consider that you are old , that sinne findes not any thing more to consume in you ; forsake this Woman that you unlawfully embrace . Regard how the Devill mockes you , who are now no more unto him but an improfitable booty . You make mee die of Laughter . Aske God forgivenesse , and turne unto him , for you have already one foot in the grave . You make mee die of Laughter , I was never more jocond , never more lusty . And these are they that being sicke , when they are exhorted to rely upon God , and order their estate by a religious will , answer , that they have beene many times in the same case : but finde themselves in the other World , before they can be perswaded they are going thither . Heere I could not containe my selfe , from this use , Lord ! thou hast given but one life and are there so many Deaths ? Grant , I beseech thee , that if I returne againe , I may change my condition , and beginne to live well , that I may die lamented .

I had scarce uttered these words , but I heard the voyce crying , The Dead , the Dead , the Dead ; and instantly saw the Earth beginne to open , and the bodies of men and women , halfe buried in their winding-sheets , to arise ; who ranked themselves in order , observing a silent taciturnity . Take each his turne , said Death , when behold one of them came near me with such fury , that I began to feare the bastinado . Hellish worldlings , said he , What would you with mee ? Why let you mee not alone , dead , and at rest ? What have I done unto you ? I that without offending in part , am defamed in all , and made guilty of those things I am altogether ignorant of ? And what are you , said I , whom I neither know nor understand ? I am , said he , the unhappy Abraham Ninny , that have bin here many years , and yet you doe nothing but mocke and deride mee . When any folly or extravagancy is committed , Oh! 't is an Abraham , say you presently , Did you ever heare the like ? What a Ninny-hammer hee is growne ? Why , a very foole would not have done it ? But know , that in acting and speaking follies , you your selves are all Abrahams , worse than you suppose mee to have beene . And for proofe , Tell me , Have I made any ridiculous wils as you men , by which you command others to doe those things , which you would never doe your selves ? Have I rebelled against the potent , or hoped to renew my youth ? Have I strived to reforme Nature , and contested with her in colouring and poudering my haire ? Have I sworne untruths ? Am I faithlesse in those things which I have promised , as you are dayly ? Have I beene a slave to my money ? or played away my estate ? Have I consumed it in banquets ? or given it to Curtezans ? Did I suffer my selfe to bee masterd by my Wife ? or beleeve that I might rely on that man , who at my perswasion betraied his friend that trusted in him ? Did I marry my selfe to bee reveng'd of an inconstant Mistresse ? or credit that there might bee built any sure foundation on the slippery Wheele of Fortune ? Have I esteemed them happy that consume their dayes in Princes Courts , for the vanity of a momentary looke ? or taken delight in Hereticall Controversies , to bee accounted witty ? Have I boasted unto people that are below mee ? or beleeved in Witches and framers of Nativities ? If Abraham have done no such foppery , of what folly can you accuse him ? Poore Ninny ! rash and insolent that you are , wherefore doe you impute your disorders unto mee , that never learnt any thing but patience ; and was of so innocent and naturall a life , that it added an impossibility to wrong any man .

As wee were thus discoursing , another that walked very gravely , came to mee , and with a commanding eye , said , Looke this way . What is your Ladiship , said I , you that speake so imperiously , and presume to bee respected , in a place where all are equall ? I am ( said she ) Queene Richard , whom if thou knowest not , yet thou hast often heard of ; for you that live are so devillish , that the dead cannot bee excepted from your malice . If you see an old wall , an old hat , a thread-bare cloake , ragged coate , or a woman that hath a treasury of years upon her , you say instantly , that they are as old as Queene Richard . But you are mad , my time was better than yours : and to justifie what I say , heare but your selves talke . Now if a Mother thinkes to instruct her Daughter in modesty , and say , Daughter , it is fitting that a Virgin that will conserve her honour , should alwayes keepe herselfe within the bounds of shamefastnesse , and looke downeward : her Daughter will arrogantly answer , Mother , that was a custome in Queene Richards time . 'T is for men to looke upon the Earth , as upon the matter from which they were formed ; and for women to looke upon men , as being extracted from them . If a Father say to his Sonne , Sonne , feare God , keepe his Commandements , pray unto him when you rise , and when you goe to bed ; eate not without blessing , and rise not without giving thankes ▪ play not , sweare not : hee will alleage the same author , Father , that was the fashion in Queene Richards dayes . So that , hee is derided that rules himselfe according to holy instructions , and men are sooner knowne by their oathes than beards .

But leaving this , that you may understand the dead are not all so lockt up in eternall quiet , but that their desires have freedome of enquiry , Is there any newes stirring ? How stands the state of Europe ? The Spanish Fleets goe well enough , said I ▪ but of late yeares the Hollanders beginne to take rude tribute from them . And the Genoes have by way of bancke encroached so farre on his Principalities , that ( like Leeches ) they not onely stop the veines , but draw the mines dry . Sonne , said shee , as long as the King of Spaine shall have the Hollanders for Enemies , the way to the Indies will never be free . And as for the Genoes , they are likely to become a stately Senate , ( like their City ) If the Canker enter not their magazin of store , and immoderate lust , convert all in Bordello . But , how goes the credit of the world ? There is much to bee said thereupon , said I , you have touched a string that makes a noise indeed : every man hath his credit in himselfe , every one is esteemed , and every one doth all things in point of honour .

There is credit in all estates , yet shee shifts places every day , and is by this time seven stages under ground . Those that steale , say it is to maintaine their credit , and that they had rather rob than begge . Those that begge , say it is to keepe their credit , and that they had rather begge than steale . Those that beare false witnesse and those that murder say the same thing . And all men call credit that which tends most to their profit , and ( presuming on their owne worth and estimation ) undervalew and defame the rest . All is now perverted . Lying is counted vertue , wiles and fetches are the chiefest qualities of a Cavalier , and insolency and impudency are the badges of gentility . Heretofore the Ilanders were men of credit , and kept themselves in a moderation of all things ; but now there are ill tongues abroad , that say , Savages may instruct them , and that their abstinence is more for covetousnesse than sobriety .

Counsellours and Lawyers , How doe they thrive ? As nests of Ants , that from one breed a million . Justice that in ancient dayes went naked , as representing sincerity , is now so swadled with paper , as if she were a nest of Spices . And whereas heretofore we had but one booke of Lawes , there are now a thousand , the cause of so many squablings & divisions , being every ones private exposition . If you goe to some Lawyers , let your cause bee what it will , they will assure you good proceeding , and tell you , 't is a faire quaere , and wants nothing but study , but that at that instant they are something busie , about a case betweene Iohn Ash and Iohn Okes , so that they cannot minde it . Yet if you will call some other time , they will revise it better . And after you have well paid them , ( for money is the spirit of the worke , and the true light of their understanding ) you shall reap nothing but protraction , and may without difficulty instruct your selfe the event . Happy are we ( said the Queene ) that are free from such disturbances ! but I beleeve there are many good and honest men amongst them , that may bee Antipodes to those thou describest .

Doth Venice stand yet ? How ? Stand ? Yes ( said I ) it stands with a vengeance : for that is a Common-wealth that maintaines it selfe , beyond all conscience . But if they should restore what they unjustly detaine from others , none need to suspect their povertie . I must needs say it is a pleasant State , a Citie founded in the Water , a Treasurie and Freedome in the Aire , and a Dukedome whom many dread . But 't is withall , the channell and sinke of Monarchies , by which they purge the filth of Peace and Warre . The Turke suffers them to molest Christians , and Christians permit them to injure the Turke , and they tolerate one another , to mischiefe both the one and the other ; so that by others dissention , they maintaine their owne vastnesse , which will swell them up , till their great ambition burst them .

But methinkes thou speakest not of England , ( said the Interrogatresse ) Canst thou bee unmindfull of thine owne Soyle ? T is not for want of duty , replied I , but because it is too full of splendour for me to comment on without admiration . Pietie in the Prince , Justice in the Magistrate , Religion in the Minister , and Obedience in the Subject , having so absolute glory , that not onely her bordering Nations congratulate her Peace , but all the World stands gazing at her opulency , who is the sparkling Diamond in the universall Ring . I am glad ( answered Queene Richard ) that goodnesse and fidelity have so strong a Tower , and hope Justice will hereafter restraine those calumnies , are undeservedly throwne upon mee . This said , shee withdrew .

The next that appeared was a gray-haird man , with a large beard hanging downe to his girdle ; whom I tooke to bee one of those wilde ones , that wee see in the kingdome of painting . And hee seeing mee stare , said , My art tels mee that you are desirous of my knowledge , it is Erra-pater that speakes to you , Is it possible ( said I ) that that Gallimaufry of Prophesies , which runne up and downe under your name , should be your worke ? Bold-face ! ( answered hee ) Darest thou so rashly offend the secrets of the gods , and the Fates interpreter ? Inhumane Worldlings ! who despise that learning that is above your reach : Finde you any Gallimaufries in my Predictions ? Can you bee so brutish , that you cannot understand the sense of these words ?

On things to come revolving oft ; I finde that Earth , nor Water soft , Shall ought produce , or fructifie ; But what shall please Divinity .

Animals ! benumm'd and hardened in vice . If this Prophesie should bee fulfilled , Could there be a greater good desired ? If that which pleases God , and that , that hee would have , were done ; Justice would rule the World , Innocency and Sanctity would dwell with us , and wee should no more obey the Devill , nor love those things which most please him ; as vaine delights , oppression , and money in its excellencie , but a vagabond of the nature of women that love to bee gadding . But to my presages .

If Parties be arightly sped , The married shall be married .

I could not abstaine from laughter , which hee seeing , Mastive ( said he ) that barkest at all , I find that thou hast not teeth hard enough , to breake the bone , & find out the marrow of this Prophesie : therefore listen , or I shall make you , since you were brought hither to that end . Thinke you that all that are wedded are married ? You deceive your selves by the just halfe ; know there bee many married that live as in single life , and many of a single life that live as if they were married . And there bee many men that marry and die Batchelours from their Wives , and many Women that die Virgins from their Husbands : because it is the fashion of the time .

I doe protest ( said I ) that wee have done ill to wrong those enthusiasmes of spirit , by our mis-interpretation , but you must pardon it , because wee wanted you to unriddle them ; they being truer than wee tooke them for , and of more efficacy expounded by your mouth . Command therefore ( said hee ) that henceforth a more reverend esteeme bee made of my oraculous writings ; whereof I will unfold one more : Many Women shall become Mothers ; And the Children that they doe beare Shall be the Children of their Fathers .

Can you except against this ? I tell you there are many married men , that if they either would or could make an exact search , would finde those Children to bee none of theirs , that call them Father . A Womans belly is very subject to caution ; and Children being got in obscurity , it is very hard to finde out the Labourers : we must beleeve the deposition of the Wife , and many times the supposition . How many people doe you thinke there will bee at the latter day , who hold now great rankes in the world , that will bee constrained to acknowledge for their Fathers , Pages of their housholds , followers , Physicians , Gentlemen Ushers , and may bee Coachmen that have beene well lasht fort ? How many Fathers will then finde themselves without Posterity , and true Successours beyond credulity . You shall see all this when you come thither , for in that place Truth will appeare more cleare than the Sunne .

Having spoken , Erra Pater left me , with an answer hanging on my tongue , and vanished . When looking backe , I perceived a leane , pale , lanke , melancholy body , apparelled all in white . Take pitie upon mee , ( said hee ) and if thou art a Christian , bee charitable ; deliver mee from the injuries of impudent and ignorant men , who ever molest mee , and put mee where they please themselves . Here he cast himselfe at my feet , and tearing his haire , wept like a Childe . Unhappy Creature , said I , What art thou ? I am one , ancient and respected , ( said hee ) whose name and fame the world abuses , by many false allegations . My name is Alter , or Another . You must needs have heard of me , for there is nothing that Another speakes not . Those that cannot allege a reason themselves , say alwayes , as saith Another , & yet I never speak nor open my lips . The Latins call me Quidam , and make use of mee to fill up the lines and periods in bookes . I intreat you therefore to doe mee the favour when you goe backe , to relate that you have seene Alter , cloathed in white , who writes nothing , sayes nothing , nor hath ever done any thing ; and that all that cite and quote mee lie : to the end that henceforth by your mediation , I may no more bee the Ideots Authour , and the Fooles proofe . In brawles and quarrels they call me Some body , in difficulties , I know not well who , in the seats of Orators A certain Authour , and in Citizens houses No body , and all to disguise the name of poore Alter , and accuse him of their impertinencies , who is your suppliant for redresse . This I promised , and he departed , and gave place to Another .

A man ( hee was ) of aspect good enough , if hee had not had a paire of hornes upon his head , and made signes as if hee would have beate mee ; at which being nothing daunted , Who brought hither ( said I ) this Signior Cornuto ? which words were hardly uttered , but behold us both together by the eares , till the dead parted us . I doe not disallow of the quality , said he , because there are greater men than my selfe that weare the horne , but yet methinkes the world might speake something of them , and not all of me . What have I done , that many others have not done a thousand times more ? The horne , hath it found its end in mee ? or have I rebelled against my superiours with it ? Have I enhaunc'd the price of lanthornes , inkehornes , or posthornes ? and is there not enough to make knifehandles , and shooing-hornes ? Wherefore then doe your scoundrell Poets afflict mee ? And of what doe you condemne mee , when there was never beast of my condition more peaceable ? They shall not leave thee yet , said I , but torment thee more , such a scope of matter I will deliver when I returne . But I will hinder thee , said hee , and thereupon wee fell againe to buffets . In this agitation of spirit I awaked , and found my selfe in a trembling sweat , as weary as if the combat had been reall . Then calling to minde all that I had seene , I converted it to my particular benefit ; judging , that there is no jesting among the dead , and that those people , that are out of all partiality and abuse of the World , are more fit to give wholesome Counsell than ridiculous advice .

VISIONS . The third Vision : OR , The Last Iudgement .

MAny are the opinions of men concerning Dreames , and many doe conclude a faith to be given them , in these dayes ; which I will neither contradict , nor approve ; yet I count it not unlawfull to regulate a transitory life by them , especially if they bee of the nature of my last , which thus happened unto me .

One Evening , after I had long examined my selfe , by that glasse of Salomon , Ecclesiastes , Sleepe laid his leaden mace upon mee at the end , and this Verse , God will bring every worke into Judgement , with every secret thing , whether it be good or evill . When ,

Methought ,

I saw a most beautifull Youth flie in the Aire , and blow a Trumpet ; the forcing of his breath much lessening the sweetnesse of his naturall complexion : yet did the sound thereof find obedience in Marble , and in the dormitories of the dead : for instantly all the Earth beganne to move , and give place to bones , which sought one another . Those which had beene Generals , Captaines , Lieutenants , and Souldiers , came first out of their Sepulchres , provoked with courage , as if the Trumpe had beene a signall to warre . Covetous men issued amazed , beleeving that it was for pillage . And they that had given themselves over to wantonnesse , conceived it a summons to some Masque or Enterlude . These things I knew by their severall gestures , but saw not one amongst them all , that thought it was to Judgement . Some Soules drew neare with horrour and disdaine of their owne Bodies , and others would not approach at all , seeing them so deformed . Some wanted an arme , others a thigh , and others their heads , yet did they not long seeke them , giving mee therein a subject whereby to admire the Power of God , in that being mixt together , none tooke the legges or armes of their Neighbours .

When all the congregated understood that it was the great Day of Iudgement , it was a notable thing to see , how that the Luxurious would not finde their eyes , to the end that they might not beare witnesse against them . Detractours would not acknowledge their tongues , for the same cause ; and Theeves made use of their feet , to flie from their hands . Here I heard a Miser aske another ( who because hee was embalmed , staid for his entrals , which were coffin'd farre off from that place ) if all that were buried should rise againe , and if the bagges that hee had interr'd should rise with him ? And there I saw a troop of Cutpurses , whofled from their eares ( which were offerd them ) fearing they should heare what they desired not .

These things I might well behold , being mounted on a banke of earth ; but hearing a cry at my feet which bad mee descend , I obeyed , and many handsome women put forth their heads , calling me ill bred , and unmannerd , for not giving more respect unto them : ( for in Hell also they have this folly to beleeve that men ought to respect them ) They appeared very jocond to see themselves of such exquisite frame , and were not ashamed of their nakednesse . But when they knew it was the Day of Wrath , and their beauty beganne to accuse them within , they put themselves in the way of the valley , with a slow and lingring pace . One that had beene thrice wedded , went inventing excuses for all her Husbands , to whom severally she had deeply sworne , never to remarry : and another said , that shee had forgot her night-cloathes , thinking that they would stay for her at some place of meeting . In this place Physitians were thrust forward , by Patients whom they had dispatched , by anticipation of time . And in that a Judge stood washing his hands , from the innocent blood , that by bribery lay upon him . Divers Divels driving before them Vintners and Tailours , a Lawyer peeping out of his Tombe , asked whither they went ? and being told , to the righteous Iudgement of God , to which they were all called ; he strove to sinke himselfe deeper into his Grave , saying , there is so much way already made , if I must descend lower . A Taverner sweating extreamly , a Devill told him , that he did well to sweat out his water , for hee would burne the better : and this was one of those , that kept a Taverne outwardly , but a Stewes within . A bow-legged Tailour went insulting , I have neither wine nor water to answer for , for I ever eate more than I drinke , but why doe they say I steale ? which another hearing told him , that hee did a great deale of wrong so to despise the Trade . In their walke they met with highway robbers , whom the Divels caught and put amongst them , saying , that they might well beare them company , because they were ( a la mode ) wild Tailours . And after these went Folly compassed on all sides with Poets , Musicians , and Lovers and with all kindes of people besides , that were ignorant of that Day , who in troopes came to the Vale , where silence was imposed on all .

The Throne was decked by the hand of the Almighty , and by the same Miracle , God was adorned with himselfe , with mercy for the Elect , and wrath for the Reprobate . The Sunne , Moon , and Starres were his Footstoole ; the winde was husht , the waters calme , the Earth still , and timorous , ready to bee entranc'd for the love shee bore her Children ; and all things in generall very pensive and heavy . The Just were busied in giving thankes to God , and praising his Goodnesse , and the Sinfull were inventing stratagems , to moderate their chastisements . Angels witnessed both by their gate and phisnomy , the care they had to comfort and welcome the Godly . And Divels were ready to unfold their accusations ; and least that any should overslip them , they had set the tenne Commandements to keepe the Doore , which was of that straightnesse , that the leanest and most mortified bodies were faine to leave some part of their flesh behinde them , the entrance was so narrow .

The Examination beganne at Adam , who was required to give account for an Apple ; which Iudas minding , and the astonishment hee was in , cried out , Woe is me , what account shall I make , that have sold the Lord of Life , and the Lambe of God ? Then passed the first Fathers , and after the New Testament , the Apostles , who were all seated neare the Chaire of Majesty . And it was a thing worthy of note to see , that there was no respect of persons , but that Beggars and Kings were mixt together , when they went nigh the Divine Presence . Herod and Pilate appeared , and perceiving the wrath of God ( though encompassed with Glory ) Pilate said , Hee that will comply with the times , deserves no lesse ; and Herod , I cannot goe into Paradise , for there those Innocents I slew will cry out against me , but why doe I chaffer ? Hel is a common Inne . A man of a fiery looke started up , and stretching out his arme , said , See there my attestation of mastership ! Every one wondering , asked the Porter who hee was ? but hee overhearing , answered , I am an approved Master of Defence , and these papers are Certificates of my tried valour . Letting them fall , a Devill stooped to gather them up , but the Fencer was more nimble than he , who leaped backward , and drawing his rapier , said , This Steele cannot be● equalled , and if you either budge or speake , I will quickly shew that I am my Arts master . All the Company beganne to smile , and hee was commanded , seeing that hee had but instructed an art , which was one of the principall causes of so many Duels and slaughters , that hee should goe into Hell by a perpendicular line : but hee answering , that hee was no Mathematician , a Divell gave him a by-blow and cast him into the pit . Then came Treasurers and Stewards , who demanding an Advocate , a Divell answered , behold Iudas , a discarded and outcast Apostle , let him speake , for hee hath exercised both professions ; which they hearing , went to the other side , and saw another Devill , that had not hands enow to turne over the leaves , were written against them .

Leave all these informations , said the stoutest of them , and let us compound ; Ha , ha , said hee , that read the inditement , Doe you demand composition ? Then 't is a signe your game is naught . This they understanding , and that no offers would be accepted , tooke the way of the Fencer , because they had beene as good men of their hands as hee , and better . They being gone , Loe an unfortunate pastry Cooke , whose adverse party beganne to accuse him ; which hee seeing , and finding by proofe , that hee had put more kindes of meate into his pies and pasties , than there were beasts in Noahs Arke ( there being neither Rats , Mice , nor Flies ) turned his backe , and leaving the word in the Devils mouth , went to see if the place were hot . Then came Philosophers , who made syllogismes against their salvation . And Poets , who would have perswaded the omnipotent , that hee was that Iupiter whom they had so often nominated in their workes . Virgil alleaged his Sicelides Musae , saying , that it was the figure of the Nativity : and Orpheus as the most ancient Poet , stood up to speake for all ; but a Divell accusing him , for having instructed the way of making love to mankinde , hee was commanded to enter once more into Hell , to try if hee could get out againe ; and obeying served as a Guide to his Companions . A rich Usurer knocked , and being asked what hee would have , was told that the ten Commandements kept the Doore , and that hee had never kept them . In that which concernes keeping , said hee , it is impossible , I have swerved ; the first Commandement saith , Thou shalt have none other gods but me ▪ and I think I have observed it , for I have kept Gold ( the worldlings god ) so secret , that neither others nor my selfe might make it the object of their veneration . The second , Thou shalt not make to thy selfe any graven Image , and I have kept ingots and wedges these many yeares , that there might neither stampe nor image come upon them . The third , Thou shalt not take the Name of the Lord thy God in vaine , and I have never sworne in vaine , but alwayes for some great interest . The fourth , Remember that thou keepe holy the Sabbath day , and I have all the weeke long provided hiding places for my treasure , that on that day it might not molest my rest . Honour thy Father and thy Mother , I have alwayes greatly reverenced them , in that I have given them the preheminence , especially in all bad actions . Thou shalt doe no murder , and I did never scarce eate , because that to feed is to kill hunger . Thou shalt not commit adultery ▪ I never did it , for women in that way are not tractable without money ; but if you will let mee come in ( said he , who beganne to be weary with so many interrogatories ) let us not loose time , for hee was so great an enemy to losse , that hee would husband time it selfe ; but saying this , he was led where he deserved . Divers Theeves followed , some of them so active , that they saved themselves in leaping from the ladder . Lawyers coveted the like good fortune , but they were set to goe through the eye of a needle . Scriveners denied their name , saying , they were Secretaries , but Proctours stood to it , saying , they were the procurers of others good ; but there was no defence for either of them . One Devill seeing a Physician , an Apothecary , a Surgeon , and a Barber comming , gave them thankes for most of the Company , sen● thither by their meanes ; and commanded some of his vassals to usher them downe , that they might assay if they could cure the burning Feaver . Another perceiving one to peere out of an hole where hee had hid himselfe , asked what hee was ? who replied , an Empericke . What! Saltinbanke , Mountebanke , and my Friend , said the Devill ! It were better for thee to bee upon some scaffold at some corner of a Street , to passe away the time with idler persons ; but since thou art come , thou shalt not want preferment : goe thy wayes into that quarter , and see if thy balsame bee efficacious against scalding ; so he went on his Friends word . The plea of Taverne-keepers was , that they had quenched the thirst of many poore persons ; and of Tailours , that they had cloathed many ; but this hindred their dispatch . Then Bankers demanded treaty , but their Sentence was pronounced , and bils of exchange were given them , to bee paid out of Pluto's Coffers , where there is no bottome . And afterwards place was given to Women , who approached with pleasing and smiling countenances , endeavouring by those meanes to prevaile : but as soone as they saw the horrid aspects of Divels , they beganne to shrike out , and antedate their condemnation . Bailiffes , Sergeants , Marshals , and many more were yet to bee judged , who being called , said they would willingly suffer , without any further triall .

The last was an Astrologer , crying out , that they were mistaken in the calculation of yeares , and that it yet could not bee the Day of Iudgement ; because the Heaven of Saturne , and the moving Heaven had not finished their course : but the Devill rebuking him , said , I wonder that among so many Heavens which you have made in your life-time , you were never so provident as to erect one for your selfe ! for which default , you must now bee transported into Hell , which was accordingly executed .

Upon this the Iudgement ended , the Throne was taken up , the shadowes fled to their place , the Aire was filled with milde Zephirs , the Earth was enamelled with flowers , and the Heavens were cleare and translucent ; and I was in my bed , more joyfull than sorrowfull , that I was not yet dead : therefore that I might make use of my Dreame , I undertooke a constant resolve , to keepe a strict watch over my Conscience ; that I may have a defensive armour , when there are no more delayes to hope for , and the soveraigne Judge shall call me before himselfe .

VISIONS . The fourth Vision : OR , The Foole Amorous .

VPon a Winter-January morning , about fo● a clocke , when cold and sloth kept mee buried under my rugge , better at ease than on a biere , consulting with my pillow upon an amorous fancy that came in my minde . I found my selfe quite strayed from my former meditations , & beheld the spirit of Fallacy , which presented to my imagination Loves inconstancy ; verily thinking I heard this Verse .

Ala● ! Coridon , what folly possesses thee ?

Afterward not knowing which way I was led , I came into a meddow a thousand times more pleasant than those which are ordinarily mentioned in the inventions of Poets ; where looking about , I espied two delightfull Rivers , that in their labyrinthian Meanders water'd it . The waters of the one were bitter , of the other sweet , yet they mingled together with so peaceable a purling murmur , that they charmed the eares of those that heard them , and qualified affections anxiety . These in their sportive motion directed mee to a goodly faire Palace , of admirable structure , seated in the midst of the Field . The portals were of Dorian worke , richly inlaid , and on the pedestall , bases , pillars , cornishes , chapters , architraves , frizes , and other adjuncts , there were engraved all the trophies and triumphs of that great ( yet little ) God : which with many other devices added radiancy of lustre to the worke . Over the chapter there was this inscription in letters of Gold , cut upon blacke Marble .

Blest and most happy is this place , In ever youthfull Love ; Who crownes the noble and the base , As their demerits move .

The diversity of stones and colours delighted admirably the sight : the portall was spacious , and the doore perpetually open , to let those freely enter whom singularity brought ; and the place of Porter was allotted to a woman , who seemed to be of the nymphall race ; her visage was celestiall , lineaments amiable , and body perfectly straight , shee was cloathed in cloath of Gold and Silver , glittering with pearles and stones of price , and was an enchantment to all that beheld her , leading captive their iron hearts in chaines of Adma●●t : and though shee was in all things like her name Beauty , yet did she not insult nor deny entrance to any , if they paid for their passage a good looke ; of whose favours I made use of and went into the first Court , where I found abundance of all Sexes , but so changed from their pristine grace that the very memory of it was forgotten ; instead whereof they had put on Loves livery , dejected eyes , yellow resemblance , and mournfull representations .

Their talke reflected not upon the faith that is to bee kept with friends , loyalty to masters , nor respect to blood ; but their kindred were mediatours to their owne alliance . Servants became mistresses , and mistresses servants . Women contracted amity with their Husbands acquaintance , and Husbands grew intimate with their Wives companions .

On this medly of affections did I stare , when I perceived a creature not perfectly man , nor rightly woman , but partaking of both ; who went and came through the multitude , having on a loose garment , spotted over with eyes and ears ; which marking , and the authority she exercised , I demanded her condition , and what she did ? to which two questions shee thus answered mee . I am Jealousie , the greatest cause of the increase of these sicke and mad persons , which thou seest ; neverthelesse I am not engaged to heale , but to chastise them . Question not mee of any other particulars , for it is a miracle when I speake truth ; because I lessen from my selfe in the delivery , being nothing but sleights and devices : but goe to that aged man that walkes there , for hee is the overseer of the Palace , and ( may bee ) will instruct you ( though slowly ) in all that you require .

I did so , and found him to bee Time , of whom I intreated a sight of the roomes and chambers , and that I might visit some fooles of my acquaintance , whom I conjectured were there . He told me hee was busie in curing the diseased , yet notwithstanding shewed mee all things , in giving mee liberty to walke about . Passing the first Court , I entred into the Maidens chamber , ( for the women were separated ) and these were kept in the strongest hold , where the wals were thickest , because of their vehement and violent passions : here I tooke notice of one that lamented , being jealous of a married woman ; and of another that was carried with burning affection to a yongster , yet durst not declare it . How one writ letters full of ambiguities , where there were more lines dasht out than good words ; and another studied with her glasse how to smile and simper , and act the fictive humours , she meant to play her Lover : that eate oatmeale , plaister , jeat , and small coale , to obtaine a pale colour : and this intreated her servant , that in the mornings hee would give her a Serenade of Musique at her chamber window , which implied , that hee should publish to all the neighbours that he was her enamor'd ; this held love letters which she let fly through windowes , and thrust under doores : and that protested to her friend her heart was his , desiring him not to require any thing more ; which he promis'd , and the foole beleeved . Some would marry , to love with more liber●y : and others desired to be with men already married , and these were rank'd in the number of incurable .

Having considered all , I durst not stay any longer , knowing by experience that a man runnes great hazard among such allurers : and that hee that gettes clearest off , is often condemned to slavery in the bonds of marriage , which is an engagement to repentance all his life long , without other hope of redemption than by Death : for there is no order to redeeme those that are captives in the chaines of wedlocke , as there is for them that are under the hands of the Turke . I went therefore to the Married Women : and saw many of them whom their Husbands kept tied and cloistered up , to hinder the execution of their designes , that broke both Prison and chaines , and became m●dder than before . Some fawned on and flattered their Husbands , when they had most minde to abuse them : and some stole their money to pay their confederates , yet never tooke heed to the account till the estate was ended : others went to heare Sermons , and on pilgrimages of Devotion , but it was to get the grace and mercy of their holy brethren , by sacrificing to Venus : and others went to Baths , sooner to pollute than cleanse themselves . Such an one recompenc'd her Husbands sinnes in the same kinde , verifying the adage , that None take greater delight to be revenged , than a woman when she avenges her selfe on her Husband with advantage . Such another went to see a Play , that she might be spoken with betweene the Acts. And this last affected her Coach so well , that shee was scarce ever out of it ; of which desiring a reason , 't is because ( said shee ) I love to bee shaken . Among this honourable conventicle those were not seene , whose Husbands were employed in Warre , Embassages , Merchandise , or forraigne Affaires ; because that they depending upon none other in that time , did containe themselves within the bounds of chastity , and as people exorcis'd , were not reputed members of this Common-wealth .

The next partition was of Widowes , armed with experience and knowledge , who counterfeited modesty and piety , yet adhered to their desires . One with her right eye wept for her dead Husband , and with her left laughed to her living Friend ; another was more muffled and vailed with passion than mourning , receiving joyfully the present , and forgetting the absent . And others laid wagers , whose vailes and hukes became them best , endeavouring to convert that sad attire into allurement . Those that were old , imitated the actions of youth : and those that were more young , made use of the time , that they might not repent in their age . There were some adored , and some adorers , who being devout , were loves penitents , and in that respect condemned to fast from meats they most longed after , for the carnall have also their Lent . Many outwardly laid on modest colours , though inwardly impudent enough : and many were very insolent , and having heretofore beene Masters , would now make use of that imperious power ; so that the Physitian had much adoe with them .

All these infirmities proceed onely through idlenesse , for where that is , lust findes easie accesse . There were some Women who accepted more letters of disburse , than a Banquer of Genoa or a German Hoorder , upon credit of their insatiable desires . Some would not be seene by him that was the visitour , but by the unexpected : and those that were most subtle , made use of their Physicians . One spake to an Astrologer , to cast a figure for her future life ; and another desired of a Magitian secrets whereby she might bee beloved . And how many did I see , that would have seemed as ridiculous as Esops Crow , if their periwigs and frontlets of haire had been pluckt off ! but , at last I got from them , shaking my head , and went to the mens quarter , on the other side of the building .

At my arrivall I observed , that the Batchelours greatest folly was obstinacy , for every one knew his errours , hut would not amend . O , that I saw many Gallants brave in apparrell , that had not so much as one penny ! Many Roarers that had heretofore boasted and bragg'd of Ladies favours , that would have beene very glad , if I had invited them to dinner ! And how many were there that had no bread , and yet felt the temptations of the flesh ? Some counterfeited the amiable , wearing perfumes and long lockes not remembring that women take alwayes the superiority of beauty upon themselves ; and others , by their vaunts of warre would passe for Duellists , yet forgot that women are ever fearefull , and quake at the sight of a weapon ; others at midnight walked the round about their Mistresses lodgings ; and others became amorous through infection , conversing with them that were so . This man on Sundayes went from Church to Church , to feed his eye with variety , and that went from house to house to exercise his wit . Some complained of more than they suffered , and others endured without opening their mouthes . Those whose vanity despised things beneath them , pretended to Subjects so high , that they lost their desire ; and those that were distrustfull of their owne worth ( though otherwise people of judgement and understanding ) applied themselves onely to meane objects . Husbands were enchained , yet not lesse mad ; for some forsooke their Wives , and followed their neighbours ; and others tooke for friends their Wives friends , and for Gossips the Mothers of their Children .

Widowers practis'd in torments past , searched rest where it was to be found , loving as short a while , and as long as they pleased ; here being amorous , there jealous ; and that which I found admirable in them all , was that they confessed themselves Fooles , yet left not to be so . Men that were most discreet , related their good fortune to those that published their disgraces ; whilest shallow Dolts were commended for secrecy . Some flattered the Chamber-maid , to get accesse to the Mistresse , and others suborn'd the Mistresse to overcome her . These had their pockets stuft with amorous lines , sealed with silke , and endorsed with gold ; and had likewise bracelets , hat bands , knots , and favours , whereof they made survey : and these were the Husbands friends , and voluntarily employed themselves to ease his cares , lending him Horses , Coach , and money ; whilest they hurried his Wife abroad to Gardens , Playes , and Banquets . There were divers Woers of Widowes , some that were beloved , and some not ; some that let themselves easily bee taken , and some that caught others . And there were many , that made their conquests with love and money , and these carried often the victory , because they fought with double armes ; yet sometimes they got the foile , and had not whereby to resist poverty .

Having at leasure surveyed all , I went backe into the first Court ; where ▪ Time thrust amongst the Company that encreased dayly , and by his industry recovered some . Jealousie punished those , who were most confident in the subject they lov'd . Memory rubbed over old sores , Vnderstanding was hid in a darke hole , and Reason had her eyes pluckt out . And having contemplated the diversity of Dissimulation , I saw a litle wicket open , where Ingratitude and Infidelity gave liberty of escape to some few : therefore to enjoy the present occasion , I doubled my pace , to get out with the first . When my Boy came and drew the Curtaine , telling mee that it was broad day ; hereupon I awaked , somewhat dulled at my long stay , yet comforted in this , that I have found it by others , and mine owne experience , that Love is nothing but meere and naturall folly .

VISIONS . The fifth Vision : OR , The World in its Interior .

DEsire the Pilgrim of the Minde , that hates Rest , and delights in nothing but Motion , agitated my Spirit from one passion to another ; till it made mee admire , how so much good , such abundance of evill , should proceed out of one Heart ! and gave way to mine eyes to shut up my senses , and open my fancy to apprehend the consequent .

As in a Glasse , so the World appeared unto mee , populated onely with one City of exceeding vastnesse ; in which as I wandered , I marked the uniformity of the Building , and the neatnesse of the Streets ; but exposed my selfe withall to the derision of the Inhabiters , and as if it had been a Maze , could not finde the way out . Now I got into the Lane of Choler , and followed Quarrels through Scarres and Blood ; and anon into the Street of Gluttony , gourmandizing and drinking ; and not long after into the Market-place , where all Vices were compact .

In this distraction I was called unto by an Old man , of meane and tatterd attire , but of awfull port , and judicious respect . What are you , Good man , said I ? Doe you envy my content ? Let mee alone ; you Old men are alwayes troubling the mirth of Young people , yet would not willingly leave pleasures your selves . You are going out of the World , and I am but newly come into it , give me ( therefore ) leave to rejoyce and bee merry ; the venerable man ( dissembling his griefe ) beganne to smile ; Sonne , said hee , 't is not to hinder nor maligne thy desires , but through pity that I strive to with hold thee . Knowest thou what the value of an houre is ? or the price of a day ? and hast thou examined the worth of time ? I beleeve not , seeing thou employest it so ill ; that fugitive houres steale away , and robbe thee of so precious a Jewell . What have the dayes that are already past said unto thee ? Have they promis'd thee to come againe , when thou hast need of them ? No certainly . Alas ! they goe and returne no more ! and passing , looke backewards with smiles and jeeres on those that let them slip sounprofitably . Therefore make use of time while thou hast it , least when thou wishest most for it , time will be no more .

I must acknowledge , grave Father , said I , that your advice is excellent : but , what are you ? and what doe you here ? If my torne Garments , and Poverty ( answered he ) tell you not that I am an honest man , I must speake my selfe , a Lover of Truth ; my name is The Worlds Disabuser ; these rents come from such as make shew to helpe me , and these blowes and bruises are presents from many , to whom I have given no greater offence than a visit . What madnesse ! the greatest part of the World say , that they desire and love mee , yet when I discover the abuse of it , some despaire , others curse , and all despise mee . Now Childe , if thou wilt see the World , come with me , I will carry thee into the chiefe Street , where all things are beheld in open view , and shew thee how it is in its Interior parts ; for thou seest nothing here , but the shell and appearance . What is that principall Streets name ( said I ) whither you will carry me ? It is called ( said hee ) Hypocrisie , 't is the Street where the World both beginnes and ends , and very great , for there is not any one whatsoever , but hath either an house , or chamber at least in it . Some being constant dwellers , and others termers , there being divers kindes of Hypocrites . See you that Fellow that stands there , he was a ploughmans Sonne , now a Gentleman . Would you take that man for a Tailour ? yet hee is one , though cloathed like a Knight : and Hypocrisie is so generall an infirmity that it is found amongst all trades . The Cobler will be a Translator , the Cooper cals himselfe Bacchus Tailour , because hee makes cloathing for Wine , and the Horse-coursers stile is , Squire of the Field ; the Alehouse is called an Academy ; the Hangman a member of Justice ; a Mountebancke an able man ; the Dicernimble ; a Taverne , a Banke ; the Vintner , a Banker , or Master of Accounts ; Stewes , houses of Commerce ; Whores , Curtezans , Bawdes , devout Women ; Cuckolds , patient men ; lust , friendship ; Usury , Oeconomy ; Deceit , Gallantery ; lying , dexterity ; and malice , gentlenesse of spirit ; cowardise , peace ; rashnesse , valour ; a Page , a Childe of Honour ; a Lacky , a Gentleman on foot ; a Pickethanke , a Courtier ; blacke , browne ; and an Asse is calld a Doctour . But there is nothing here that appeares in its owne forme , or that hath the proper name ; but all the World is full of lyes , in what part soever you examine it . And if you note it well , you shall see that wrath , gluttony , pride , covetousnesse , luxury , sloath , murder , and a thousand others sinnes , proceed onely out of simulation : and that of all sinners , there is none so presumptuous as the Hypocrite ; in as much as other bad livers sinne onely against God , but hee sinnes against God , and with God also , since hee makes him an instrument of his sinne ; and for this cause our Saviour , willing to shew how amongst all others they were hatefull to him , after hee had given many affirmative precepts to his Disciples , he gave them one negative , saying , Bee not sad like Hypocrites : and as he taught them by many Parables , and Comparisons , what they should bee , now lights , now salt , sometimes like Guests , sometimes as the talent ; so also he instructs them what they should not bee , Bee not like unto Hypocrites ; to certifie unto them , that not being Hypocrites , they should not bee wicked , for the Hypocrite is wicked in all things .

Upon this discourse wee came into the great Street , where wee tooke an eminent place , to register all that passed . The first remarkable thing was a funerall Convoy , composed of a large retinue of Kindred and Friends , that followed the grief and heavines of a Widower in close mourning , whose head hung downe , and gate was of that slownesse , as if he had not had strength sufficient to carry him to Church without a supporter : which compassionating , O happy Woman ! ( said I ) that hast found a husband , whose love and faithfulnesse , went hand in hand with thee in thy life time , and now followes thee to thy Grave ! And happy man , who hast found so many Friends , that accompany not onely thy sadnesse , but seeme to exceed it . Good Sir , consider a little their anguish . O , that there is nothing but vanity ! answered hee , all that thou seest is not done but by constraint , though those exterior outsides seeme to gainsay it . Seest thou those waxe lights , torches , and the rest of the hearse , who would not say but that they light and accompany something ? and that it is for something that all this funerall pompe is made ? but know , that that which is within the coffin is nothing , for the body was nothing in its life time , Death hath lessened that nothing , and all the honours that are given unto it serve for nothing ; but this is done , because the dead have their vanities and State , as well as the living . There is nothing within but Earth , not able so much as to produce fruit , and more filthy to looke on , than the dirt on which thou treadest , that deserves no honour , and on which the share and plough have no predominance : and that dolefulnesse , which thou thinkest to have noted in these Friends , is nothing but anger and madnesse , that they are not ranked according to their degree and ambition . The Widower also is not so afflicted for his Wives death as thou imaginest , but 't is the expence that vexes him , seeing hee might have performed the ceremony with more ease , and lesse cost . He mutters within himselfe that she hath wrong'd him , in that seeing shee was to die , shee did not die suddenly ; without putting him to such charge in Physicians , Chirurgians , and Apothecaries , who by their bils dispose his goods into parts : hee hath buried two with this , and takes such delight in being a Widower , that hee is upon a treaty already with one , whom hee was a wel-willer unto during his old Wives sicknesse . Thou shalt see him shortly risen , from those deadly habiliments which interre him .

I was wonder-strooke at these speeches . Ah! that the things of this World ( said I ) are farre different from what wee see them ! hereafter I will bee more reserved in spending my judgement , and those things I shall clearest behold , will most doubt of . This buriall vanished so soone from our eyes , as if wee had not seene it , or beene likely to have made the same journey ; and as if the deceased had not shewed us the way , speaking in a silent language ; I goe before to stay for you , whilest you keepe the rest company , as I have heretofore done , with as much neglect , and lesse devotion .

Wee were hindred from thinking on this , by a noise which we heard in an house behinde us ; where wee were no sooner entred but the assembled beganne a lowd cry , accompanying the sobs and grones of a woman , newly become a Widow .

Their sorrowes were very lively , ( yet availed not the dead ) every minute they wrung their hands , and sent forth sighes that seemed to proceed from the center of their hearts . The chambers of the house were disrobed of their ordinary furniture , and the poore afflicted was laid on a bed , in a roome hung with blacke . One of he● Comforters said , Alas ! all your teares are to no end , and I am unable to comfort you , being more grieved at your sorrow , than if it were mine owne : another , you ought not so much to macerate your selfe , because your husbands good life assures you that hee is in blisse : and another , that shee must bee patient , and conforme her selfe to the will of Heaven ; which words made her double her complaints , and with greater vehemency to afflict her selfe ; saying , O God! Why doe I live after the losse of so deare and loving a Companion ? O! that I am unhappy in being borne ! Woe is me ! Whither shall I goe ? Who is there now that will take into his protection a poore woman ? a desolate Widow ? and helpe her in distresse ?

At this pause , all the rest of the Quire , with instrumentall discord of their noses and handkerchers , deafened the house ; and then I found , that in such occasions women purge by their eyes and noses , some part of their bad humours : notwithstanding I could not bridle my selfe from participating some part of their griefe , and to turne towards my Conductour with these words . Pity , said I , is very well bestowed on a Widow , because shee is forsaken of the world ; the holy Scripture cals them mutes and tonguelesse , for so the Hebrew word signifies ; there is none that speakes for her , and though she take so much courage as to speake for her selfe , yet none will heare her , so that that imports as much also as if shee were dumbe . Give mee leave therefore I pray you to commiserate the like misfortune , and to mixe my teares with these womens ; and wherefore , said hee ? To what purpose is it that thou knowest many things , if thou dost not make a right use of them ? Observe a little and thou shalt see , how this Widow , that seemes externally to have her body made of Hosanna's , and her soule of Allelujahs ; hath a sable shrowd , but greene heart . Seest thou the obscurity of this Chamber , and those vailes that cover their faces ; these are to disguise their teares , which are nought but dissembling . Wilt thou comfort them ? let them alone : they will revell as soone as they see no body by them , that may serve as a subject to exercise their hypocrisie . And then will the Gossips beginne their game ; Come , come , will one say , bee comforted , you have an advantage , you dreame not of ; your husband hath left you young , and there are brave men enow , who will seeke after and make very much of you . You know partly already the intentions of such a Gentleman , I am confident that if he once obtaine you , he will be so kinde , that you will quickly forget the dead . Faith , if I were in your place , sayes another , I would not bee long pleasing my selfe ; for one lost , there is ten found : I would practice the counsell my partner gives you . But I thinke you are much obliged to him , that visited you yesterday . What say you ? Is hee not an handsome man ? yes truly , and loves you extreamly . Alacke , alacke , will the Widow then answer , winking with her eyes , and drawing her lips together . T is not time yet to speake of that , all depends on Gods providence , and he will ordaine it so , if hee finde it necessary ; yet your counsell is not to bee neglected . Dost thou marke what extreame griefe shee suffers ? her husband is but newly dead , and shee already wel-nigh married . Consider therefore with thy selfe , how vaine and unprofitable these exclamations are , which thou hast made .

Hee had hardly ended , when wee heard in the Street a great hurly burly of people ; and going forth saw a Sergeant bleeding and out of breath , crying out , Assist the Kings Officers , and running after a Debtour that fled from him . The Common-wealth is much beholding to this Fellow , and ought very well to reward him , said I , seeing he thrusts his body into so great hazard , to save their lives and goods . See how hee is torne and bloudy , in having employed his strength and power for the good and rest of it .

Soft and faire , said the aged man , if I stop not your course you will never leave ; Sonne , assure thy selfe that he that is fled is one of the Sergeants friends , with whom hee often carrous'd ; who for not having made him partaker of a late booty hee had taken , the Marshall in spight would arrest , and cast into prison ; but after he had broke from him , and soundly beat him , hee is escaped as you see ; and had need to have good legges , seeing hee runnes against those , that are swifter than race-horses , where they thinke to bee well paid . But note , that it is not the least thought of the Weale publique that puts him on this action , but his private particular and malice in being made a Novice . For I assure you , that if his owne interest had not excited him to it , and that hee had not sought after him in way of revenge , the Thiefe is too much his Friend , and their combination is too great for the Law to take place . And though such as are decayed and in debt are their chiefest gaine , yet their revenues proceed from whips , the rope , and the gibbet . Therefore I wonder why the World that hates them so much , doth not resolve to forsake vice and practice vertue , ( though but for a yeare or two ) to bee aveng'd and starve them . T is a cursed office since their wages are paid by Belzebub .

Hee had spoken more , if hee had not beene deterred , by the great noise and ratteling of a Coach , in which was a Courtier , so swelled with pride , that he seemed to bee heavier than the foure horses which drew him : hee sate as upright as if he had been a statue , and was very greedy in his lookes , but so disdainfull that every one offended him : his attendants on foot were many Lackies , and in the Coach a Jeaster and a Flatterer , who in obscene jeasts , and itching talke , past away the time . Happy art thou , said I , as soone as I saw him ! without doubt the World is not made but for thee , seeing thou livest in pleasure and greatnesse ! Surely thy riches are well employed , seeing thou maintainest so great a train● ! All that thou thinkest and speakest ( said my Moderatour ) is nothing but surmise , yet hast thou truly said , that the World was made for him , since it is nought but vanity and folly , with which hee is puffed up . I beleeve if thou dive into his retinue , thou wilt see more Creditours than Servants ; for his food and livelyhood proceed onely from loane , credit , hope , and faire promises : and if the secrets of his Conscience were ript , the inventions , that hee uses to maintaine life , would bee found more irkesome , than if hee got his bread by delving . Seest thou that Buffoone and Sycophant ? they are subtler than himselfe , for they deride , yet live upon him . Can there then bee a more miserable man , than such an one , who buyes flattery at so deare a rate , and thrusts himselfe into engagements to get nothing but false reports ? Foolish Lord ▪ hee is ravisht with the adulation of these two , who perhaps have told him , that there is no Courtier his equall , that the Ladies have no object more pleasing , nor conversation more enticesive ; when they doe it onely to soothe and impoverish him .

Last of all , a Lady passed by us , whose gesture and behaviour was so gracefull , that shee attracted all the beholders . Shee went with an artfull carelesnesse , hiding her face from those th●t had already beheld her , and shewing it to such as tooke no notice of it : her visage was snow and roses , which contrary to the order of nature united themselves : her lips vilified Corall ; her teeth Pearle ; and her hands Jessamine ; and in briefe she was the Epitome of earthly beatitude : and I my selfe was more inflamed with a desire to follow her , than any other object I had seene ; but at the very first step my Guide stayed mee , yet not without my expression of discontent in these termes : hee must bee infinitely barbarous , that is insensible of the delicacy of so excellent a beauty , as this is : how fortunate is he who meets with so favourable an opportunity ! and how worthy that shall injoy her ! what unknowne pleasures is hee master of , that in all liberty possesses a faire wife , who had not beene made but for the love of man ? what lightenings and thunder shot from her eyes ? what enchantments and fetters for a free Soule ? was ever Ebony so blacke as her eye-browes ? Chrystall cannot brag of so much clearnesse as her front . Certainly , this is the master-peece of nature , and the haven of all desired wishes . Till this present , said my aged Friend , I thought thee onely blinde , but I see thou art both blinde and foolish . Did I not tell thee that the eyes were made to see , but that it is for the understa●ding to make election ? Know , that this woman , who seemes so really perfect , slept yester-night very ugly , and now is nothing but prime and plaister ; the haire shee weares came from the Tire-women , for her owne was blowne away with an ill winde that came from France , and if any remaines , shee dares not shew it , least it should accuse her of the time past : her eyes have no other browes than those which a pensill makes , nor her haire any other colour ; neither doth her pulchritude proceed from any other nature , than Alembicke waters , essences and painting . Kisse her , and shee is oile ; embrace her , pastboord ; and bed her , an Anatomy . Upon what then is thy judgement founded , that thou thinkest her so accomplisht ? Thine eyes , have they not betraid thee ? Admire then thine ignorance , and understand ( not to trouble my selfe with this womans imperfections ) that most of the Sexe are Hypocrites , and that the wise mans saying can never bee contradicted , One man among a thousand have I found , but a woman among all those have I not found . So I awaked .

To the REader .

Reader , I here present thee with a Vision of Hell , as a proviso whereby to amend thy life . Therefore if thou intendest from this houre to beginne , bee not culpable of thine owne vice , in calling me Detractor , or evill speaker , seeing that none can calumniate the Damned . If Hell seeme to bee too great , take what portion thou wilt , and be silent : Is it not a curtesie when thou hast as much or as litle pain given thee as thou pleasest ? And bee not amazed if thou finde nothing but horrour and obscurity , for thou maist well thinke that neither the Sunne nor joy inhabit there . I need not begge any ingenuous mans approbation , nor feare any envious mans censure . If my Booke please thee , thou maist drive away thy idlenesse with it ; or otherwise , bring it to light upon thy chimny hearth . At which I will not bee offended , since I have given thee counsell so to doe ; nor the Bookseller neither , if thou hast paid him for it .

VISIONS . The sixth Vision : OR , Hell .

T Was Autumne , a time that invited many to their countrey houses , to receive the fruits of the Earth , and participate the second Spring : a Season of retirement that called me also , though to no mansion of mine owne , yet to a receptacle of my Friends where I found the ; refreshment as healthy , and the artlesse Groves to yield as pleasant a solitude , as the artificiall Wildernesses of the great . In so much , as it quite altered my wonted study , from the dangerous shelves that many are split on , to the harmelesse Mountaines of Innocency and Labour : and from corrupted riches , and delicious fare , to low feeding and elated Soules . On which dreaming under my meane Canopy , I was transported through the neighbour Wood , into a place farre from home , of no more night ; and to one of the most delicate prospects that could bee presented , where the serenity and temperature of the Aire , did in their gentlenesse fanne the heat , and ravish the Senses . On one side the Rivers of liquid Chrystall prattled with the gravell and flinty borders , on another the Trees conversed with their Aspin murmur , and in the midst of these the Birds sung ; I know not whether in emulation of Plants and Fountaines , or by way of parallell to give them musique for musique : but for as much as our desires are vagabond , and dulled with the much enjoyment of any one thing , solitude beganne now to be troblesome , and I was impatient for association : when at the same instant ( a marvelous thing ) I saw two wayes whose birth came from one place , which separated themselves by little and little , till they were past a separable distance . That on the right hand was so narrow , that comparison can hardly be made , and for being but litle frequented was so full of brambles , thornes , stones , and ruggednesse , that it was a mighty toile to enter or goe upon it : yet were there some signes of divers persons that had passed , though with infinite discommodity ; for they were faine to leave both their money and their flesh behinde them . And of some passing , but their faces were wanne and meager , and they walked without ever looking backe : to say that one might ride upon it , is a Fable , for having asked that question , a Traveller told me , that Saint Paul was faine to alight ; and indeed I saw not any tracke or footing of Beasts , rut of Coach or Cart-wheele , nor print of Litter or Sedan , nor was it ever remembred that there had been any .

At which wondering , I applied my selfe to a poore man , that rested to take breath , and asked if there were no Innes nor places of retreat to lodge in . No , you must alwayes goe , ( said he ) there is no staying , neither Inne nor Taverne ; for this is the way of vertue , and but few passe through it . Know you not that in the race of life , to be borne is to set forth , to live to pilgrim it ; that the Inne is the world , and in going out of it there are not many steppes , to enter either into paine or glory . Saying this he went on , God be with you , ( said hee ) hee that goes in the path of Vertue , looses time when hee staies ; and besides there is danger in answering those , that informe themselves onely through conceitednesse , and not to be instructed .

He proceeded , stumbling often against the stones , and breathing at every step , and the teares which distilled from his eyes ( in mine apprehension ) were able to have softened Flints , to be more pliable to his feet . Upon what spleen was this way made ( said I ) ? It is very rude and laborious , and to make it more distastfull , the parties that goe in it are untractable and uncivill . This agrees not with mine humour ; therefore I left it , and turning on the left hand got into the other ; where I saw much Company , many Gallants , and many Coaches full of humane Beauties , whose eyes seemed to contend with the Sunne ; some singing , others laughing , and others eating , so that I tooke it to be some great Festivall . And then remembring this sentence , Tell mee with whom thou conversest , and I will tell thee what thou art ? that I might not be reproved for frequenting bad Company . I endeavoured to follow this that seemed to be so good ; and hardly had set forward , but like to him that glides upon ice , I found my selfe in the midst of the rout , amongst Ladies , Masques , Comedies , Playes , Banquets , very consonant to mine inclination .

This was not like the other tracke , where for want of Tailours , people went naked : there were to spare here as well as of Merchants , Skinners , Millaners , Upholsters , and all Trades besides , that serve to advance humane pride , as Embroiderers , Perfumers , Sadlers , Shoomakers , Sempsters , Periwig-makers , Haberdashers , &c. And for Inne-keepers and ●Vintners there wanted not abundance : with whom I had not long beene , when I perceived some of both wayes to change , and shift from one to the other , by very strait by-pathes : at whom wee all jeasted , but chiefely at those that went from us , calling them Dissemblers , precise , wretched , and the refuse of the world ; at which some of them stopped their eares and passed by , some staid to heare us , others were deafened with our cries , and others flattered with our perswasions revived .

I saw also another middle way , where many went , afarre off seeming to bee vertuous , but nearer hand were of our side . One told me they were Church-hypocrites , and were but onely vailed and disguised to us , for they had no Maskes , nor false Visards for the Eyes eternall . They went alone , and were held to bee lesse subtle than Moores , and more brute than lawlesse Barbarians : because that they are contented to enjoy the happines of the present life , not knowing any other : but these that can tell what temporall and eternall life is , are so accursed , that they neither freely enjoy the present , nor hope for that to come . So that the saying is to good purpose , that They gaine Hell with a great deale of desert , that is , with much paines taking . Here the Rich followed riches , and the obstinate went apart , for they would not bee governed by the more advised , but ranne with all their might , and got alwayes to be first . Magistrates drew after them all litigious Negociators . Passion and Covetousnes allured bad Judges . And Kings trained whole Common-wealths ; neither wanted there Ecclesiasticall men of all sorts , and whole Regiments of Souldiers , who had beene truly glorious if they had set forth the Name of God in fighting , as they had done in swearing . Some generous Spirits of the number of those who were on the right hand , seeing these wretches carrying yet pasports , and petitions for reward of their service , cried unto them moved with charity ▪ and as if they had gone to some battle , To mee Souldiers , to me . What mean you ? Is it an action of valour to forsake this way , for feare of the dangers that are in it ? Come on boldly , for wee are assured that those that fight lawfully , shall be crowned : let not vaine hopes of reward entice you : a worthy man ought to seeke for nought but vertue , and shee is the reward of her selfe , if you rely upon her : turne therefore and take part with us , and you shall bee happy . The Souldiers heard very attentively all these perswasions , and ashamed of reproofe and cowardise forsooke their Station , and hanging downe their heads cast themselves into a Taverne .

After this I saw a great Lady , without either Coach or Litter , on foot and alone , and sought out a Scrivener to record it , being no ordinary accident , but finding none , I verily beleeved that I was not mistaken ; yet calling to minde that I had heard that the way to Paradise was full of crosses , austerity and repentance , and considering that I saw not any about mee , but such as discoursed of wantonnesse and delight , I beganne to question and misdoubt ; but I was drawne from this incertainty , by a multitude of married men , who led their wives by their hands , that people might take notice of their affection ; nevertheles some of them were their husbands fast , since he dicted himselfe that shee might feed on dainties ; and others his nakednesse , since hee grudged his owne apparell to maintaine her in her Coach , and to buy toyes , gownes , and superfluous trifles for her : by which I learnt , that a man ill married , may boast that hee possesses in the person of his wife , all necessary qualities to bee put in the list of Martyrs : and seeing their troublesome life , confirmed my first faith , that I was in the good way : but that opinion had no long durance , because I heard a voyce behinde me crying , Make way there for Apparatours ; O God! said I , Are there Apparitours here ? Without doubt wee are going to Hell ; and it was true , for at the same instant wee were got in by a little Doore made like a Mousetrap , easie to enter , but impossible to get out .

I was greatly astonished , in that in all the way no man remembred whither hee was going , and yet when wee were entred , every one agast beganne to looke upon his Companion , saying , it is infallible , we are in Hell . At which mine heart beganne to quiver , and with teares in mine eyes , I beganne to bewaile those I had left behinde mee in the World , as my Kindred , Friends , and acquaintance : but turning my face towards the way by which wee came , I saw most of them comming , whose arrivall did a little comfort mee , beleeving that they would bee some consolation in so sad an abode , if perhaps I should stay there long .

Notwithstanding I pursued my journey , and noted the Gate to bee guarded by seaven Divels , who kept account of all that entered . They asked my name and quality , and knowing my designe , let mee passe ; but demanding of the throng behinde mee the same question , and being informed Tailours , one of the Divels answered , What a strange thing is this ? I thinke that all the Tailours in the World beleeve , that Hell is made for none but them , they come in such clusters . How many are there , said another Divell ? There are an hundred , said the former : Deceive not your selfe , said his Companion , It is impossible if they be Tailours there should bee so few , for the least band that comes dayly of them , is not lesse than a thousand or twelve hundred , and we have already so many , that we know not where to pile them , neither know I whether we ought to receive them or no : the poore Smell-feasts were much frighted at these words , beleeving they would thrust them out ; but at last they found favour and got in . I may well say ( thought I then ) that these people are very wicked , since the refusall of entrance into Hell is so rigorous a threatning to them . Hereupon behold a Divell of the Blacke Guard , who stackt them up in a place of stowage , they being by reason of their dry seeding accounted the wood of Hell .

From the Gate going through a darke entry , one called mee by my name ; at which horrour strucke I turned , and perceived it to bee a man , yet very hardly because of the darknesse which was very thicke , and the flames that environed him . Ah , Sir ! said he , Doe you not know me ? I am such an one , a Bookeseller ; Is it possible , said I ? Yes , answered hee , 't is I ; Who would ever have thought it ? Hee beleeved that I would have pitied him ; but when I had seene his face , I beganne to admire the righteous judgement of God in his just punishment , for his Shop was a very Store-house of Sedition ; and it was he that sold and vented all those wicked , scandalous , and schismaticall Pamphlets , against Church and State Government , which at this day runne up and downe under the hands of malevolent , disaffected persons : and somewhat neare him , I also espied another , whose Shop had beene no other than a Stewes of licentionsnesse , and a Magazine of heresies , fraught with nothing more than obscene , scurrilous , prophane , railing , & popish Pamphlets , tending to the subversion of all good maners , & to the encrease of superstitious vanities . After that I had a while beheld them , I made shew of administring redres unto them , but they perceiving that I counterfeited , said , What would you ? t is the cursednes of our condition , that wee are not condemned for our owne workes onely , as other men are , but endure and suffer for the workes of others ; yet herein we receive some solace , in that we are not alone , but have Printers our coequals , who for their owne lucre , have been as forward as our selves in these things ; and for ought wee see , suffer more extreamly than our selves , and that for nothing more than for their unjust and unconscionable dealings towards us , in often printing such great numbers of overplus bookes to their owne abundant benefit , and our great losse and detriment . More they would have said , but that a Divell with the smoake of his loose paper , stopped their breath ; to avoid which fume I went on , saying in my selfe , Alas ! If there are men condemned for selling and printing the evill workes of others , what shall become of the Writers , and those that practice them ?

I passed on , and went into a Cave , where I saw many burning in immortall Fire . One of them said I , I never oversold , I never sold but that which was just , why am I thus afflicted ? When I heard him say he had sold that which was just , I thought it had beene Iudas , and went nearer to see if hee were red haird , as wee commonly imagine : but I found it to be a Mercer , dead not long before . How , World-thrive ( said I ) are you here ? he scorned to answer , because I gave him no better Title : but one of their Torturers ( to augment their paine ) These Drapers , Mercers , Goldsmiths , and Silkemen ( said hee ) would alwayes shape their false lights and waights according to their fancy , and make their measures of what length and shortnesse they pleased , and now they finde the gaine on 't . But if the World would be wise , they would quickly banquerupt all these kinde of men ; for then they would understand , that Stuffes of Gold and Silver , and Silke that Plate , Diamonds , and Pearle , that Lace , Silke , and Cloath , and all other things upon which they set unmercifull rates , are things rather superfluous than necessary , and that these are they that feed all your disordinate and foolish expences , to which they allure and flatter you with a Lover called Credit , by meanes whereof they invisibly ruine you .

The Divell would have spoke more if I had not left him , to see from whence proceeded those peales of laughter , which I heard . They were Spirits deriding one , who would not submit because he was a Gentleman , shewing his Pedigree taken from the Heralds Office ; but a Divell told him , Gentleman ( said he ) let your descent bee what it will , you have not done in your life time any other , than the works of an infamous man , in swearing , blaspheming , and haunting of Brothell-houses , and Tavernes ; in which respect , your Armes are discarded by the Court of Hell . Hee that is vertuous , is the truly Noble : yet though a man were an upstart , ( as you are ) if his actions were worthy imitation , wee dare no more touch him than a thing sacred . Your billetting would not have been made here , if you had bin better than others : but since you esteeme your selfe so noble , you shall be burnt that we may preserve your ashes : this said , he cast him into a furnace .

Taking the left hand , I saw a number of old men , tearing their flesh , and lamenting bitterly , and inquiring what they were ? This is the Inclosure , said one , of those Fathers , who damne themselves that their Posterity may bee rich , and who otherwise are called the ill-advised . Miserable that I am ! ( said one of them ) I never had in all my life time so much as one minutes rest , I did not eate , slept not , and went almost naked , tormenting both my body and minde to gather substance , that I might richly marry my Children , and with great summes purchase them Offices and honours : which done I died without being sicke , that I might diminish nothing of those golden heapes , I had gathered together ; and yet the breath was scarce out of my body , but they quite forgot mee ; no teares , no monrning , and as if they had had certaine intelligence of my damnation , they neither charitably wish me a joyfull resurrection , nor accomplish that which I commanded them ; nay more , to aggravate my torments , God suffers that I see them from hence consume and spend in dissolutenesse , those goods for which I have so impoverished the World . T is no time now to complaine , said a Divell , Have you not heard being on Earth this Proverbe , Happy is the Childs whose Father goes to the Divell ? At this the poore men multiplied their cries , which object moved me to so great compassion , that I could no more behold them .

But a little farther espying an obscure Dungeon , in which was heard a great jangling and clattering of chaines ; I asked what place that was ? and was answered , it was the bounds of O that I had ! I understand you not , said I , what are they ? These are ( said one ) the Ideots of the World , who gave themselves over to vice , to their insensible damnation ▪ and now remembring what they should have done , and did not ; to defend themselves from the paines they suffer , they continually cry , O that I had confessed my sinnes to the Lord ! O that I had repented ! O that I had gone to Church ! O that I had served God! O that I had releeved the poore ! O that I had refrained my tongue , and many other exclamations like unto these .

After these late Repentants , I met others farre worse , who were in a baseCourt full of much nastinesse ; and wondered to heare the title that belonged to them , which was as a Divell told mee , God is mercifull , and will forgive . How can that bee , said I , that mercy should condemne , since that condemnation is an action of Justice ? You talke like a Divell . And you said the Divell , like a Foole , since you know not that halfe of those that are here are adjudged by Gods mercy . But , to make you understand the Riddle ▪ Consider how many Sinners there are , who when they are admonished of their evill doings , leave not for all that to continue and increase them more and more , in answering to their Reprovers , God is mercifull , hee regards not so small a thing , his mercy is so great : and thus whilest they hope in God , persevering in their wicked wayes , wee never distrust them . After your reckoning , ( said I ) none may rely on the Mercy of God . You are dull , said hee , you must trust in it , 't is that that helpes forward good desires , and rewards good actions , but it is denied to those that are obstinate in their wicked wayes , for it is to play with Grace , to beleeve that it serves to cover guilt , and to thinke that a man may receive it just when hee hath need of it without ever endeavoring to get it . Gods mercy is infinite for his Saints and repentant Sinners , who struggle to become worthy ; and those that have the greatest share , are such as are most fearfull ; but hee that knowes how great it is , makes himselfe unworthy the effects , when he turnes it into the liberty of evill doing , and not into spirituall profit .

Can it be ( said I overwhelmed with marvell ) that so good a lesson should proceed from the mouth of so mischievous a Doctour ? Which spoken ▪ the Divell shewed mee a flaming partition , wherein ( as one of the Tortured told me ) were those that were afflicted with suddaine deaths . You lye , ( in reverence bee it spoken to the Gentleman that heares mee ) said the Fiend , no man dies suddainly . Death uses no surprize . There wants never warning . How is it that you complaine of dying suddenly , when since your very birth , since you beganne the course of your life , Death was alwayes with you ? What is more ordinarily seene in the World than dying and buriall ? What is spoken of more in the Pulpit ? or read of more in good Bookes , than the frailty of life , and certainty of Death ? First of all the body , growes it not every day nearer and nearer to its Tombe ? Cloathes , weare they not ? Houses , decay they not ? Your owne Diseases , and those of others , knocke they not at all houres at the Gates of your Soules , remembring them that they must dislodge ? Sleepe , represents it not to the life the death of living man ? and life , is it not maintain'd by the death of beasts ? And for all this , you are so impudent , as to say that you dyed suddenly . No , no , change language , say hereafter that you are unbeleevers , dead , without ever thinking that you should dye ; and learne besides , that Death takes as soone the youngest stripling , as the agedst decrepite ; and according to what they have done , be it good or ill , she proves either a Mother or a Stepdame .

He shewed me also a vast Cauldron , savouring of many oily sents , wherein were preserved Apothecaries , Comfit-makers , Chirurgions , Distillers , Barbers , and Mountebankes , with many more , for feare of rottennesse , saying , these are the true Alchimists , and not Geber , Ruspicella , with the rest ; because they onely writ of what metals Gold might bee made , but made it not ; or if they did , none ever since could penetrate into the depth of their secrets . But these , out of puddle water , stickes , Flies , dung , Vipers , Toads , simples , sugar and excrements , can make Gold , of better substance than all those could , that ever medled in the art , because that theirs is ready coined for use . In which respect wee are carefull to preserve them , least our treasure should decrease .

Hereupon another Divell made signes that I should come unto him without noise ; which having done , hee set mee against an open casement , saying , looke in there , and see the ordinary exercise of fowle Women . I did as I was commanded , and beheld a very great number , some whereof were putting blacke patches on their faces ; others pluckt up the haire on their eyebrowes , and others that ▪ had none made use of blacke Lead , some put on fore-tops of counterfeit haire , some placed Ivory teeth in their gummes , in stead of those of Ebony which were fallen out . This eate Ambergreece Comfits to purifie her breath , and those held boxes of painting , with which they daubed their faces , and by this meanes became infinitely shining , without being either Starres or Sunnes . Well , said the Divell , would you have beleeved that Women had been so inventive and ingenious to perdition ? I knew not what to answer , but turned away , and saw a man sitting on a Chaire all alone , without either fire , ice , Divell , or racke about him ; who neverthelesse cried out with the fearfullest cries that ever I yet heard ; his heart t●ickled drop by drop from his eyes , and he tore his bre●st , and gnawed his armes , in so furious a manner , that I thought he had been mad ; O Lord ! said I , with what despaire is this poore man transported ? no body to my thinking doth him any harme ; Friend , my Friend , What Fury bewitches you ? For what doe you complaine being here alone , free from all manner of Torture . Alas ! said hee , with a terrible voice , I feele in my selfe all the pangs of Hell together . You see not the Hangmen that are linkt to my Soule ; you see them not ( said hee , reiterating his cry , and turning about as distracted ) but hee sees them , whose severe and implacable Justice can measure offences , with torments without measure . O Memory ! thou art to mee a cruell Divell ! memory of the good I might have done , memory of those wholesome counsels I have despised , and the evils I have committed , Ah! that thou dost afflict me ! And to heape up my misfortunes , when thou leavest me , my Reason beginnes her course , and the imagination of that glory I might have had , and that others possesse , without having bought it so deare , as I have done the paines I suffer ! O understanding ! What cruelty dost tho● use towards mee , in setting before me Heaven and Paradise , so full of beauty , joy , content , and delight , and yet drownest mee more and more in despaire ! Some release I pray thee . And thou my Will , Is it possible that thou refusest to make a truce for one poore moment ? You that are a Pilgrim of the other World , who aske what torments mee ? Know they are the three powers of my Soule , converted into invisible flames , and into three Executioners , who without hand or Element , burne and teare my Entrals . And if by chance they cease to wracke mee , the Worme of Conscience gnawes my Soule , as the perpetuall food of insatiable hunger . Ending this word , he cast forth a deepe groane , and turning from me ; Mortail , said he , Consider that those of the World , who were illuminated with the Gospell , and endowed with celestiall Graces , and have not employed them to their owne Salvation , carry their Hell in themselves , and are tormented with the like misery as I am . This said , hee beganne his first worke : and I departed very pensive , apprehending in my selfe , that that man must needs have heavy crimes upon his Conscience . But the Divell seeing mee sad , whispered in mine eare that it was an Atheist , who neither beleeved in God nor the Divell . O that an understanding man is really accursed ( replied I ) when he cannot tell how to make profit of that Talent , which God hath given him !

Not farre off , I saw abundance of People , drawing a fiery Cheriot through a burning Lake , with rings thrust through their tongues , to which the harnesse was fastened ; and a Divell going before them with this Proclamation , This is the punishment of swearers , slanderers , and lyers . In the Waggon were easie beleevers ; and in a roome whose prospect looked upon them were beautifull Women , tormented in quality of Witches ; at which mine heart melted , but a Divell came to comfort mee , saying , Doe you not remember the evill they have done you ? Have you not often found by experience , that they use a certaine kinde of Magicke that destroyes ; therefore their paine is agreeable to it .

I followed my devillish Conductour , and saw Judas ▪ accompanied with false Stewards . T●●tours , and such O●ficers as himselfe , some whereof had no ●●●●heads , and others no face . ● seemed to bee well pleased with them , who related the exploits they had done in his imitation . Going nearer , I saw that their torment was like that of Titius , on whose entrals a Vultur still gnawed , for their Consciences were their greatest Tormentours . I could not suppresse the desire I had to speake , perjured , disloyall , traitour , villaine above all example ( said I ) how durst thou bee so vile , as to sell thy Master , thy Lord , and thy God ? Why , answered Judas , doe you complaine of that ? You should rather commend than condemne mee , since you receive so great a benefit thereby . T is for mee to bewaile that am excluded from the possession of so great a good , as I have put into your hands . But thinke not that I am Iudas alone , Know that since the Lords Death there have beene and are worse than I , more wicked , and more unthankfull , witnesse Heretickes , and Schismatickes . For if I did once sell my Master , I was in part cause of the Redemption of Mankinde ; but they in selling him , you , and themselves , have lost all the World . And others , who are not content to sell him onely , but they scourge , and crucifie him , more ignominiously than the Jewes , in their wicked lives . And though I know that repentance now availes mee not , yet I would have you on earth to looke into yourselves before you censure me ; since I was the first Steward condemned for sale , and not for bargaine , as is the use and practice of all my fellowes .

I would heare no more , but making way , saw a great bulke of building which seemed like some inchanted Castle ; in which were many Venereous Divels tossing Whores and Thieves from scalding oyle into frozen ice , to heate and coole their appetite . One of the Females stepping to the threshold , where I and my Guide stood , Gentlemen ( said shee ) I pray you tell us whether this bee justice to condemne People both for giving and taking ? A Thiefe is condemned because hee takes from another , and an Whore because shee gives . For my part , I maintaine that there is no injustice in us ; for if it be justice for every one to give of his owne , and that we doe no other , wherefore are we damned ? Wee found her question too difficult to bee derided , and therefore sent her to Lawyers and Counsellours , who were not farre from her : but remembring that I had heard her speake of Thieves , I asked where Seriveners were , because as I came , I overtook none by the way : I beleeve , said my Divell , that you met not any . Why ? Are they then allsaved ? No , said he , but they come neither on foot nor horsebacke , but flying on wings a million in a flocke ; in respect of which lightnesse , they are tormented in an upper Chamber .

I past by , and not farre from thence went unto a place , in which many Soules were shut up , some whereof were very silent , and others clamorous . One told me it was the empalement of Lovers , at which I was something grieved , seeing that Death doth not kill the sighes with the body . Some talked of their passions , and endured a torment of loving distrust , and others attributed their losse to their desires and imaginations , wherof the force of the one , and , the colours of the other , did present pictures to bee a thousand times fairer than persons and substances . The most part-of them were disquieted and molested with a torture called I thought . ( as a Divell ●old me ) and asking what that was ? Hee smiling replied , 't is a torment agreeable to their offence ▪ for when Lovers see themselves deceived in their hopes , either in the pursuit or possession of their Mistresses , they say alwayes , I thought that shee did love mee , I thought shee would have beene the raising of my fortune , I thought that shee would have been faithfull to me ; so that the cause of their 〈◊〉 proceeds not from any other thing but I thought .

Next to Lovers were Poets , who endured the same punishment , because their passions were not much different . These men are of very jeasting humours , ( said the Divell ) for whilest that others mourne and bewaile their sins , they sing theirs , and publish them every where . For if they have but once laine with a Cloris , Phillis , Silviae , or Melita , by the meanes of one song they will walke her through a kingdome dockt like a Chimisticall Goddesse . They will give her golden haire , a Chrystall forehead , eyes of Emralds or Diamonds , teeth of Pearle , lippes of Purple and Rubies , with words of Muske and Amber : and yet for all these riches of which they are so prodigall , they cannot get credit for a meane sute among Brokers , a course shirt among Sempsters , nor a crackt beaver at the second hand .

Fearing too long a stay , I went on to see the devout Impertinents , who make prayers and requests to God full of absurd extravagancies . O that they gave testimony of much griefe ! Their tongues were chained in everlasting silence , and their bodies made crooked and bending to the Earth , condemned to heare for ever the fearfull cries of a wheazing Divell , who thus reproved them . You brazen-fac't abusers of Prayer , and the long sufferance of GOD , presumptuous , who dare treat with the Divine Majesty , with lesse respect than you would doe with a Merchant with whom you traffique : how many times have you made these execrable petitions ? Lord , take my Father out of this World , that I may enjoy his goods . Let my Brother die within few dayes that I may succeed him in dignity . Grant that I may finde a Mine of Gold at my feet . That I may bee fortunate in play . That my Sonne and Daughter may be richly married . That the King may cast his favour upon me . And adde unto these rash demands ; Doe this Lord , and I promise to give money towards the marriage of Orphants , to build Almes-houses , and relieve Hospitals . What blindnesse ! to promise gifts to him , from whom you desire riches , and to whom all things belong ? What arrogancy ! to require of God in quality of favors those things , which he gives ordinarily for punishments and chastisements ; and although you doe obtaine , yet you never performe your promises . How many protestations have you made to God , his members , and his service , when you were in the abysse of raging and tempestuous necessity , on land , at sea , in sicknesse , in despaire , of which you have held no reckoning when you have obtained your wishes . But you were never other than Hypocrites and deceivers . Your oathes and vowes were never made through devotion , but necessity . Did you ever aske of God your Soules rest ? the increase of Grace , his favours , and inspirations ? No verily , and I beleeve you were altogether ignorant of the worth of these spirituall riches , thinking too much on temporall ; and knew not that the most pleasing sacrifices and oblations to GOD , were purity of Conscience , humility of spirit , and servent love and charity . Hee takes delight that men should be mindefull of him , that he may multiply his benefits , but they never remember him , but when they feele affliction , and that is the reason God sends them calamities , to maintaine their zeale . Unjust demanders ! Consider now how little those things you have desired , and God given , have staid with you : and how unthankfull they have bin , ( though you have ever cherisht them ) since they have not accompanied you to your last end . Consider that your Children and Kindred doe so little remember what goods you have left them , that they employ not one penny to pious uses , yet they are excusable , in that seeing that you did none in your life time , they know you cannot take pleasure in them though performed after your death : and besides that you are in a place which they trust never to deserve . Some of these miserable men would have answered , but the muzzles that lockt up their speech would not permit them .

Thence I went into a great Hall , smelling abundantly of Sulphur ; wherein were Alchimists , whom Divels examined with much trouble , for they could not understand their gibbridge : their talke was altogether of metallicke Substances , which they named after the seven Planets , as Gold the Sunne , Silver the Moone , Brasse Iupiter , Tinne Venus , &c. They were all charged with furnaces , crusibles , coales , bellowes , argall , minerals , dungs , mans bloud , and alembicke powders ; some calcined , others washt ●here they purified , there separated , made firme that which was volatile , rarified and converted into fume , that which was firme : in another place they transmuted formes , and fixed Mercury ; then having resolved the viscous matter , exiled the subtle part , and fire corruptible , when they came to the coppell all exhaled in vapour : some disputed whether the fire was to be made of Beech or Maple ? whether or no the fire of Raimundus Lullius was to bee understood of lime , or of the effective light of heat , and not the effective heat of fire ? Others with Hermes ensigne , gave the principle to the great worke . Others looked upon the blacke become white , hoping to see it red . And whilest that the proportion of nature with nature , did contend and aide it selfe ; whilest that the rest of their blinde Oracles did waite the reduction of the first matter ; in lieu of converting dung into haire , and humane bloud , ingots , and wedges of Gold ; they turned fine Gold into fine ordure , became fooles , beggars , and false Coiners : how often did I heare them say , The Dead Father is risen , kill him once more ! How many did I see busied to explain these words , so often repeated by al Chimist authours , God be praised , who suffers that out of the vilest thing in the world , so excellent and rich a matter should bee made ! Some said they had found the sense , and that if the Philosophers Stone was to be made of the vilest thing in the World , it was to bee made of publike Strumpets , because there is nothing so infamous in Nature , as to prostitute ones body to all commers ; upon this opinion they went to boile and distill them ; but a Divell came , saying , Gentlemen Philosophers , will you know assuredly , what is the vilest thing in the World ? It is Alchimists , therefore desiring to make the Philosophers Stone , following the method wee heard you talke on ; wee will put you into the fire to make an experimentall proofe . As hee said , so t was done , and the poore mad Chimists burned almost with their owne wils , so great a desire they had to see the Elixir :

Not farre off from these , I saw a great society of Astrologers , and superstitious men . One of them who was a Fortune-teller , looked upon the hands of all the condemned , saying , it is very easie to know by the Mount of Saturne , that you were to bee damned ; and as easily to bee distinguished by this girdle of Venus , that you are all lechers . Another who was encompast with Spheres , contemplating the Starres , rising up cried out , O God! What misfortune ▪ If my Mother had but been delivered of mee one halfe houre sooner , I had beene saved ; for at that instant Saturne changed aspect , and Mars lodged in the house of life . Another said to the Divels that tormented him , that they were best to bee assured that he was dead , for his part he would not beleeve it , because he had Iupiter for ascendant , and Venus in the house of life , not having any evill aspect ; which signified that hee should live , an hundred and one yeares , two moneths , sixe dayes , foure houres , and three minutes . And another reduced his Science into certaine heads , to divine of things to come , and know things past ; yet could not guesse at the time that was now present , nor of his owne and his Companies damnation . Besides these there were many Magicians , Negromancers , Sorceresses , and Inchanters in the same station ; and many places of expectation void , which were said to be kept for certaine great men , who added faith to these devillish . Disciples .

At last I beganne to bee very weary , and looked about to see if I could finde any place to get out ; which striving to doe , I was ( before I was aware ) in a long Gallery , in which was Lucifer Prince of Hell , environed with his whole Court composed of he and she Divels ; for there are Females as well as Males : but fearing to faile in respect and civility , his horrible countenance also frighting mee , I staid at the entry thereof ; when the Usher of the Chamber came and told me , that being a Stranger , his Prince had commanded him to bring me in , and shew mee all the rarities . I thanked him for the honour his Master did me and for the paines hee tooke himselfe ; and complementing , beganne to consider how the place was better adorned , than those are of our greatest Lords and Potentates , though the most curious in the World : for they have nought but dead Statues , or painted pictures , dumbe , insensible , immoveable ; but here all the persons were animated with breathing and life : and which was most rare , were of no base condition . None but Emperours and Kings , some Ottoman , some Roman , some Christian , besides many Queenes , Princes , and Princesses , who would binde mee to too long a description in nomination . But for as much as I was not able any longer to endure the aire of this hot Climate , I intreated the Fiend to shew mee which way I might get out . Yes , said he , follow me . And then he shewed mee a passage , through which I got into the same Vale I mentioned at the beginning of this wonderfull discourse ; trembling and rejoycing both together , and meditating on the divers punishments many were tormented with , who perhaps had lesse deserv'd them than I my selfe ; which made me undertake a constant purpose , to live for the time to come in such sort , that I may avoid feeling the reality and truth of those torments , which I beheld now onely in vision . I intreat thee Reader to make thy profit hereby , by mine imitation , that thou maist need no further experiment .

FINIS .

Imprimatur ,

SAM. BAKER .