A nevv yeeres gift The courte of ciuill courtesie: fitly furnished with a plesant porte of stately phrases and pithie precepts: assembled in the behalfe of all younge gentlemen, and others, that are desirous to frame their behauiour according to their estates, at all times, and in all companies: thereby to purchase worthy praise, of their inferiours: and estimation and credite amonge theyr betters. Out of Italian, by S.R. Gent.

The Courte of ciuill Curtesie .

How a yonge Gentilman may behaue himselfe in all companies , and be prepared for ordinary entertainments , and to get a good oppinion and credit among his betters . Chap. 1.

FIrst hee hath to consider , that the lacke of good behauiour , which is a comely audacitie , with out a sausie presumption ( which argueth discréete iudgement and wisedome ) maketh his inferiour to be his equal , and maketh his equall his better , till himselfe hath attayned not only the habit of béeing the like , but the time to make himselfe know to be the like . Therefore if he shall light in the company of any , whose liuing and birth is worse then his owne , and yet perceyueth the other for his wisedome and grauitie to be well esteemed of by others , it becommeth the yonge Gentleman to giue him the place ( or at least with instance to offer it him ) but yet with such a modest audacitie , mingled with a smiling grace , and curteous spéeche , neither too lowde nor whispering , as the rest of the company may well perceiue : it is the vertues , and not the man that is preferred , and that it is offered rather of a curteous disposition , then of a shéepishe simplicitie , which wil be the better vnderstanded if he shall vtter some familier spéech in yelding the place at the doore , as thus .

I pray you goe , for I looue to follow the steppes of mine elders . Or thus :

You must néedes goe , for I cannot away to goe formost . Or thus .

On , on I pray you , you bee the next the doore . Or thus :

If you goe not wee shall striue all day , for I will not . Or thus :

You make too mutch adoe for so small a matter : And at the placing at the table , as thus :

Will you syt sir , and I wil be next you ? Or thus :

Not I by your leaue . Or thus :

Such a one will needes haue you by him . Or thus :

You shall not rule me till you come to your owne house . Or thus :

The place is fitter for you then for me . Or thus .

Goe too , shall we striue all day like women .

And if it be one that be of great estimation , either for office , or ancientie , and will yet of too much curiositie refuse the place , then it shal be best to sit downe first , but to take a lower place either on the other side , or on the same side . But there ( by the way ) it is to be considered that this curtesy is not so precisely to bee vsed , either at common tables , where eche man payeth equally for his meale , nor yet at ordenary tables in the Court : for in either of these two places , except diuersity of degree make difference , men vse not this curiositie : then this aforesayd at the table , is when men meete in their equals or inferiours houses , in which it is to be considered that the owners of the tables must beare the swaye of placing , if he be the better or equall . Howbeit , if the owner shall call or place one ( either not knowing who ought or not caring who doe ) that is inferiour euerie way , sauing for wealth , in such a case , the younge Gentleman shall doo well not to tarry till other be set , not abyding the placing of the owner : but takinge his nexte companion to set himself downe first , rather two or thrée lower , then he should be the next to his inferiour : whereby the owner shal be ( in sylence ) taught to consyder better an other time .

And he must not suffer himselfe to be remoued any higher , that he may kéepe the owner still in doubt whether he so placed himselfe of mislike or of good fellowship . But if there be much adoe made , and that he finde the owner to finde his owne errour : then it will be curtesy to couller the fact with good words pleasauntly , As thus :

Why ? thinke you that I can eate no meate but at the vpper ende of the bourd . Or thus :

I pray you hinder not my good happe , I am where I like . Or thus :

I pray you giue me leaue to sit where I like . Or thus :

I pray you trouble not your selfe , you shall sée vs as merrye here as you be there . Or thus :

As long as I finde good meat I neuer vse to studye for my place , Or thus :

I warrant you if I had not liked this place , I would haue bin so bold as chosen an other . But if happen the owner of the house , be so grosse and careles , that hee either doo not or will not finde any mislike of the matter : then would I wishe in such a case , the young Gentleman should be furnished with some guirding speeches or els some pleasaunt scoffes , to countenaunce out the matter , with those that syt by him , that the rest may sée he choase the place in scorne of the other , Or thus :

I am happely placed here , for if I had mounted any higher , I had béen cleane out of countenaunce . Or thus .

We wil be as merrie here , as though we sat at the vpper ende of the bourd : or to some companion , that sits next abooue by the younge Gentlemans placing , thus :

If you behaue not your selues gently , and be good to vs of the second messe , we will kéepe you from mounting the next time . Or thus :

Beware freinds , pride will haue a fall : speake not so lowde your betters be in place . And to conclude , to make as much mirthe and pastime as may be all the meale . But if a man be in a noblemans house , or a Knight of great reputacion , then he must be contented for that time , as pleaseth them . But he may the nexte time , take as good a place as he can with modestie get , and when he is from the bourd , not loose any place that reason or courage can aduaunce him to . For as no man is disgraced by giuing ( of his curtesy ) place to whom he list , so to haue it taken from him by others being his right , is an abasement not to be suffred , if a man can take it either by slight or courage .

Now that this young Gentleman , may know in what sorte he may accompany himselfe with all sorts , and to all estates : he shall know , that the eldest sonne of a Knight while his father liueth , may count himselfe equall with a Gentleman of .cc. li. land rent of assise ( for so the Statute limiteth ) and may offer himselfe a companion with the best Squire , if his wit with a modest audacitie will serue him thereto , but not without some reuerent respectes in his spéeche : specially if the sayde Squier be of grauitie , and so of reputation , either for his wisdome or office , as if he wil aske a question , thus :

I pray you syr , what ? where ? or why is sutch a thing ? Or thus :

Will it please you to doo , or haue such a thing : and in his affirmation and negation to answer , as thus :

Ye sir , no sir . And if the other aske him any question , as whether he will doo this , or that . Then thus :

Mary sir I will tell you . Or thus :

With a good will , if it please you , &c. As the matter shall fall out . Howbeit these spéeches , if it be to no better then to the best Squier , or an ordinarie Knight be to be vsed , with such a famillier kinde of pronuntiation , as it may appeare to be vttred by him of his curtesy : meaning rather to giue them more then he greatly néeded , then of any great difference he thinkes to be betweene them : specially if they be sutch , as he is not like any way , either to be in daunger of their hurt , or in néede of their help . And though these kinde of reuerent speeches néede not to be so curiously vsed , by the inferiour , to one much his better , when they be once very familier : yet they become the speaker so well , as if they be vsed with a good audacitie and familier countenance , a man may vse them to his inferiour , without any abacement or disgrace at all to himselfe , and specially to Ladies and Gentlewomen of credit .

Then he hath to consider that among yonge Gentlemen , or younge Noblemen , there needes no great curiositie , but before a Barron , and so vpward , he may not be couered while he standeth in his viewe , except the Nobleman bid him : vnlesse that Nobleman vse such an ordinarie kinde of fellowship with all men ( as he soeth ) as meane as himselfe vse him with small curtesy : and yet he must way withall whether that good-fellowship bee withall men indifferently , or onely to suche as be his familliers : for sutch as be Noble may make theyr companions whom they list , and the rest though they shal be better to such companions , not to vse euer the lesse honour to him .

And let this stand for a generall rule , that whatsoeuer familiarity a noble man shall show to any his inferiour , yea though he professe to make him his equall friend : let the inferiour still beware of vsing himselfe rudely , sawcely or carelesly , especially in the presence of others , For though many to assure their inferiour of their good-will , séeme to banish all curiosity : yet such a one shal be best estéemed , and longest hold friendship with his better , that in all their greatest familiarity can make it appeare to others that he dooth not forget , that he playeth or iesteth with his superiour . Which a man may very well doe and yet holde company in all manner of sportes , testes , and pastimes : then much more he that is a straunger must haue the more regarde . And as it is good manner for a man in his owne house , or his friendes , if he be the best in the company , to offer intertainement to any noble man : so in a straunge place in the house of his better , though there be no better then himselfe in the place , he may not presume to beginne intertainment : but it is his part to be ready , and next the Nobleman in sight , against it pleaseth him to vse him , till he séeth him accompanied with some others , or call some other to him : and if it be but open talke deuised to passe away the time , then to helpe lengthen the same at his discretion : otherwise to finde some talke with others , and rather to stande or sit , with a steddy and assured countenaunce , as though he were studying some matter of waight , or harkening to others talke if it be not secret : then to accompanye him selfe with such as be vnwoorthy of his company : and such count I seruing men , and foolish doltish persons though they be his betters . But when a man shall sit still and say nothing , he must be sure to haue an assured countenan e , not gnawing any thing in his mouth , or playing with his legges , toes , or fingers , and to haue alwaies an eare and an eye about him , to here what is saide , and to be reddy if any part of an others talke , eyther by word or looke be addressed to him , that he may receiue the occasion , and winne in the talke : and though no such cause be offred , yet it is a better grace to harken other folkes communication , then to be talking with a person of vaine credit : and if a man shall get him out of the way for lacke of countenance , when noble persons or others of reputation be in the place : then will his inferiour lye in a waite for occasion , and step in , to bee of familiaritie before him .

Furthermore , if talke be offered to this yonge Gentilman by his better , he hath to consider whether the same procéede of a desire to passe away the time , and for want of other companie : or els ( as some doo ) because they wil be thought curteous , they will saye some thing to euerie body , but for feare of too much familiaritie , will not stay longe with their inferiour . To this last it shal be good only to answer to the question , adding some reason to verefie the same , but not to enter any new matter , nor to dilate any further in the old , then he shall perceiue him by his countenance and attentiuenes to heare without prouocation . But if the inferiour perceiue , that the talke is ministred vpon the first respect , that is to make entertainment : he must not onely answer all his demaunds , but enlarge the same to the vttermost : And when he séeth his better pawse , so that he turne not away warde ( as though he would be gon from him ) to inuent some matter of himself , to lengthen talke : And that he may the better doo so , In any wise let a man shun as much as he can in his entertainments to speake of himselfe as to tell , what he hath saide or what he hath donne : for that will be taken to come of a desire to tell his owne praise , except it be either to his very frend or els that it be somthing that thother is desirous to here . he must before hand haue enquired ( of such as come in his companie ) if otherwise he cannot learne , what manner of country the stranger dwelleth in : from what place he commeth : and whither he is going : what pastime or exercise be loueth . By which meanes he may redemaunde of the wearines , or plesantnes of the iourney : of the fowlenes or fayrenes of the weather : whether the Country he dwelleth in serue commodiouslye to the vse of sutch things as he delighteth in : whether the Gentlemen of that shyre be companiable in the like or not : and by this meanes , also he shal be able so to vnderstand of mo countries , and men , then he knowes , although he met with them as straungers , yet he shall be prouided of sumwhat to discourse with them thereof . But if a man talke with his better , he must alwaies obserue with what attentiuenes or willing minde the other giueth care to him , that he may leaue off , before the other be weary : and to be very héedefull that he speake nothing affirmatiuely , but that himselfe hath seene : but he may well say I haue harde , or I haue read , that this , or that is thus . And in tellyng any thing by heresay , specially to a stranger , he must respect thrée things , th one , that it sound not to the dispraise of any by name , except it be a thing openlie knowne , and yet the dispraised may hap to be so neare a friend to him that shall heare it , as the teller shall get mislike . The other is , that when they tell a tale of an other mans mouth , he forbeare to tell the name of his aucthor , especially if he bee his freind , for if it shall séeme vnlikely though it be true , he shall bring his freinds credit in suspect . The thyrde kinde is , that he neuer take vpon him in open presence , to make any report of the sayings or doings of his betters , except they be such as the company knoweth him to be familiarly acquainted with , for otherwise , he shall make himselfe compared to them that talke of Robin Hoode and neuer shot in his bowe . Lastly let him neuer make vp his entertaynements with the disprayse , or mocking of any , eyther present , or absent , though he heare other doo the like , ( except only in the companie of his very assured freinds ) and that for this respect . A yonge man must euer thinke that it is vnpossible for him to be so compleat in all perfections of béehauour , but that some thing remains in him worthy the laughing at , if men should not forbeare him in respect of time which brings experience to the wisest , and peraduenture too , euen some of the same defects which he seeth scoff at in an other , may be in himselfe , vnknowen to himselfe , or at least others as ill : And therefore the wisest way is , if his better séeme to deride any for his béehauour , to appeare by a smiling countenaunce to be of the same opinion : but in woords to escuse it , if hee may , as if the dooings of him that is mocked shew simplicitie , thus :

It may be that bashfulnes is the cause : if they shew rudenes , then thus :

Want of experience makes men erre . But if they be his equals , or inferiours that so scof , then merelye , thus :

Go too syrs , many a one going about to mocke on be cares not for , dooth often touche himselfe or his néere fréende , or by a similitude thus :

On , on , saw yée neuer any or this , that litfe vp a Weapon to stryke another and hyt himselfe . Or thus :

Take your pleasure my masters , I warrant you there be that doo as mutche for vs , as we doo for them . And in déede there cannot any greater praise be giuen to any man , then this , that one shall neuer heere him speake yll of anye , and hearyng yll , wyll make the best of it . Howbéeit , it is bothe within the limmittes of honestye , wysoome , and fréendship , any man to discourse plainelie with his freind , either of the misbehauiour , or vnhonest dealynges of any : that on the one side he may shew himselfe a misliker of ill persons , and also make his freinde ware of them . And by the way it is to be noted , that there be thrée sorts of people , which whosoeuer shall scoffe & skornel at , or els iest with them , further then the compas of curtesy shall permit , shall receiue more disgrace by dooing it , then the other shall by suffering it .

The fyrst is women , or simple milde sprited men : for women must neuer be iesters , nor scoffers , further then the bounds of modestie and curtesie , to make the time passe away the more pleasantly : so that a man to iest so farre with them as they may not for shame answere , nor for insufficiencie quarrell for , wil be accompted a dishonorable battell , wherin the vanquished hath more 〈◊〉 them the vanquisher : This is ment by sharpe and taunting iestes when a man will seeke to disgrace or put one out of countenance by iestes . for it is better to yéelde with silence , then to contend for the masterie in vnfytting termes , and to offer the milde spréeted man the like : that fynding himselfe agréeued , hath neither the wit to shift of it in words , neither the courrage to reuenge i● in déede● : is 〈◊〉 the same predicament that the woman is : And all noble mindes doo of their curtesies forbeare to offend , and offer to defend all those that either cannot ( as féeble persons ) or ought not ( as the feminine sexe ) reuenge or defend themselues .

The second sorte that may not be mocked or scoffed at ●●e age● persons , and such as be deformed , for want either of bewtie , fanour , or other blemishes in their shape , stature or linunes : because none of these things be faults of their owne making , neither lieth it in their power to amend them ▪ So as we ought rather to bee mooued thereby too thanke the maker or vs all , for dealing so much better with vs , then with them , then to scorne or depraue them for that they cannot helpt . And if withall we will consider , that the deformities of the minde , be so much fowler then those of the body , as the soule is of more value , and ought to be more vniforme : it wil be a good meane to make the outwarde defects of others , very small in respect of our owne , which cannot but he greater and many moe , and consequently , rather to escuse them , then despise them .

The thyrd sorte that cannot beare , neither ought to be offred scoffing , mocking , or lesting : be those that be in miscrie : either by sorrow , imprisonment , or any aduersitie , by losse of fréen●s , substance or credit : For these be things sent from God , to put vs in remembrance , that we hauing deserued as ill , may fall into the like when it pleaseth him : and in the meane times be obiects for vs , to practise our compassion and charitie vpon . But there may rise this question , séeing that publique enterteinments , specially among younge folkes , are continued more often with spéeche of little importance , then with matters of waight : How a man finding himselfe in such companie , as are neither fit to discourse of matters of wisdome , nor yet to be imparted with of his owne priuate affaires , shall finde matter suffici●nt to passe the time in companie ? For answer héereunto , let this be remembred , that where as I haue sayd , that men must take heede in their open talke , how they be to busy in bringing in the sayings and dooings of noble persons , least the hearers should thinke that he arrogateth to himselfe greater acquaintance with such , then in déede he hath : or els , least comming to theyr eares , they should mislike that their inferiours should make them their talking stockes . Yet if he that shall so introduce ( by way of confirmation , ensample , or similitude ) the saying of his betters , be sure that it she●●●●s wisdom & praise , or at the least , some pleasantnesse with but any harme or disgrace to any other , he may well vse it in his talke : Prouided that he speake it as by heresay , ercept he haue it in deede by his owne knowledge . Also women and deformed persons , may be pleasanted and iested with , if their wit be sutch as they delight in the like , and can in good sporse enterchaunge in the same manner . Prouided that the boundes of curtesie be obserued ( that is ) that there be no cause of blushing giuen .

Also , all men in sickenes , prisonment , or pouertie , be not miserable , for they be only such that haue an afflicted minde : for some can iest and scoffe at their owne disgraces , thinking thereby to make them seeme the lesse in other mens eyes , while they appeare no heuier , then sutche as themselues can pleasantly beare : And sutch had rather be rested with then pittied .

The fault therefore that can be committed in these persons , is the mocking them behinde their backes , or despising them , which no man ought to shew to any , except it be to them that be knowen to be impudent and shamelesse persons , or else such as be knowen to be ouerwenyng fooles in their owne conceyte , and be suche as doo the like by others . Of these a man may talke his pleasure , as well of them , as with them , without any disgrace to himselfe : Prouided that if any quarrell rise thereby , he be as readies of courage to maintaine it with his hand , as of speeche to vtter it with his tongue .

Also a man may test with his very famillier freind : if he finde him of disposicion willing to beare it , and of wit sufficient to aunswer it . And it skilles not what he lay to his charge , though it be dishonestie : prouided that it be not true that is imputed to him , or if it be true that the other be so brasen faced as he will not be ashamed of it .

I would not aduise any man to iest mutch with his inferiours , vnlesse they be such as he knoweth , both can and will vse a restraint of ouer male partnes . For if a Gentilman should be saucely vsed by iest , by his inferiour , he cannot escape disgrace , whether he beare with it , or quarrell for it : but bearing it is best , and to shut it vp rather with a pleasant nip , then any way to seeme angry , if the mirth he of his owne beginning .

And thus much for a taste how a man may passe his talke among his betters and equals , in a straunge place , and in straunge company .

Yet this admonition more I must adde , that who so in his entertainments shall endeuour to tell any tale to mooue laughter ( spectally in straunge companie ) had néede to be sure that it carrye that life or quicknesse with it , as he be not so much deceaued of his expectation , that he be faine himselfe to laugh alone : for that wil be so great a disgrace , as in stéede of laughing at the table , they will smile in theyr stéeues at him : and therfore to shun that he must beware that he take not in hand to tell any thing for foolish , that is not folly : nor for wise that hath couller of folly : nor for a wonder that is not wonderfull : nor for rare , that is common : for want of experience may deceiue all these .

¶ How a man shall beehaue himselfe in bad company , and among such Roysters as will offer familiaritie with him , will he or no : and first a guesse of sutch meanes as they will vse thereto . ¶ The second Chapter .

THeir manner is lightly , if they finde a younge Gentleman that is to bee of a fayre liuing , if they sée him soberly giuen , after they haue made their deuise among themselues , how euery man shall play his part , that one of them shall pretend great grauitie with him , and he shall praise him to the cloudes , and become his councellour : another shall tel wonders to his fellow , to sée if between them they can catche a Woodcocke of him .

Another ( if the fyrst deuice serue not ) will go about in scoffing and iollying sorte , to sée if by putting them out of countenaunce , they can make him glad to bee of their faction , and to further the same , an other shall seeme to reprooue all them . And as though he were the plainest honest man in the company , he will offer to quarrell with them in his behalfe : and all will be done with such oathes and sad lookes , as for all a man is warned ( he shall doubt ) whither there he any that meane good faith or not . And it may be indéed that some of these may meane honestly , and that may be the first and the last , ( for thother two bewray themselues ) and therfore a man must vse those he doubts of in such sort , as he neither vtterly reiect them , meaning well , nor shew him so foolish , as at the first or vpon small acquaintance shall take vpon him to praise or aduise him , let him consider what reputation and countenaunce he is of , or if they be sutch , as be of lyuing , and withall can be contented to liue within the compasse of his owne , then there is the lesse suspition to he had of him , further then this : that euery wise man will suspect any man that too mutch praiseth him ( except it be his famillier and assured freind ) but for the more suerty it shal be wel to answer in this manner : not seriously , but somewhat myling and famillierly . Me thinks it very good that you and I were neuer better acquainted : for by that meanes you maye be kept in that good oppion which now ye séeme to conceiue of me , either by heresay , or by your owne guesse , least by too much conuersation you be made to chainge your minde : but in the meane time I thanke you , bothe of your good liking , and of the good aduice you profer me : for I shall euer haue néede of good counsell : and if there be any other thing ( because I am vnfurnished to requite you in the same ) wherein I may pleasure you as much , you shal finde me as ready . And so to shift him of , and fall into some other talke , enquiring of this or that , him or her , as the obiect of the eye or minde shall lead .

Now for the wonder tellers , I finde thrée or foure fortes of them : the one sort onely vpon pleasure to passe away the time , not looking to be beléeued of any , but to be iolled within the like : With these the best way is meerely to take vpon you to know it to be true , and to ad to it something that maye make it séeme more vnlikely . And though it should so fall out that the tale should be true , that to another seemeth either vnlike or vnpossible : yet is there no harme done , in not séeming to beleeue it , while I know no reason to lead me thereto : mary , if after the same with sad asseueracion and others be iustified to be true : a man must of curtesie seeme to eredit their othes , but neuer the more to coufesse it likely , except they can shew so by reason .

Thother sorte for that they would be taken for dooers or knowers of great things , will for their owne glorie tell maruels , either of such things as they haue done , or such things as they haue seene in straung Countries . And will thinke in déede , what by his solemne countenance , what by swearing and lying , eyther to be credited , or at least that no man shall séeme to discredit them : and if any go about it to quarrell with them . In this case I would either say nothing , or if he should direct his tale to me , whereby I must be drouen to says something : I should be in sutch sorte as I would séeme to soothe him in woordes , but others such as I thought my fréends , should perceiue by my countenance I rather thought it pittie to put him out of his vaine , then was of the minde to beléeue all he sayd . Yet that must he done so cunningly too , that if the teller or the hearers should , to picke a thanke , chalenge me for the same : I would be able ( if I list ) without denying anye thing I sayde or did , or make the blame light on them that would goe about to distaine my meaning , as thus :

Can I not looke on such a one , or speake so , but that I must meane as ye would : it is you , me thinkes , that go about to bringe in question that which no man els thought on , if I were as be , I would thanke you for that , &c.

The thyrde , and the worst of these wonder tellers , is he that in very déede maketh it his art , of purpose to catche Woodcockes , as they terme it , and they will vse it either so conningly or so impudently , as they will make him , whom they hunt after to be a Foole in that pointe , or seeme a foole : for they will so mingle thinges like to be true , or at the least not impossible with things merely , faulse and vnpossible : as if the hearer shall either receiue all indifferently , or reiect all indifferently , he shall seeme either too ignorant , or too light of beleefe . And if he shall by iudgement scan and seuer the other from the other , and so condempne any parte , though not the whole : then swearing , flowting and quarreling , wil be offered to iustifie the matter : and this it is , will they say ) to tell a tale to him that hath neuer gon further then his mother and nursery , to call for his pappe in a morning , &c.

And then must the last man that I first spake of and is the fourth in this tragedie , steppe foorthe and tell his fellow he offreth the yong Gentleman too much wrong , and he shall not take it at his hands , & himself will take his part , & go into the Field either with him or for him .

To shift bothe these of , the best way , if any will rid it , is first to let the other to tell all his lies , and to let him passe with a smile in the sleeue , as they will call it , rather then to vse either admiration , or negation : but if he be vrged to saye his oppinion , as he shall , if it be a verse of course , then shortly to answer , thus : or the like .

I say no more , but it may be true for me : for there be many things that séeme vnpossible , and yet prooue true Matters of faith may not be reasoned on , Or thus :

Methinkes it is a very good tale , I meane not to scan any further on the matter . And these or the like woords may be vttered with such a grace , as the countenance may shew the minde , and yet the speeche keepe them from quarrell . But if they wyll néedes prosecute it to the vttermost : then he that shall seeme to set the yonge Gentleman a gog . and offer to be his companion : he must of curtesie seeme to thanke him , but not be so vnwise hs accept him .

For no wise man will accept into his company , at such a bargen , a stranger if he haue any of his freinds to make accompt of , though he suspect no practise at all , but yet he must be put of with good words , as thus :

I thanke you , you shall not néede to take the paine , for I hau● promised a fréend of mine , There is a difference betweene ruffaly phrases and such reprochefull woords as expresse the fowlenesse of the act or the ilnesse of the person . in these cases ( if I take any body with me ) it must be he : I will quarrell with no body , but if any body haue any quarrell to me , I haue businesse into sutch a place , such a day , at sutche an hower : I will haue but my selfe and my man , or but my selfe and my friend , there he may finde me if he dare : and so asmuch as may be to forbeare ruffainly words . But if any man be called by any reprochefull names , they must néedes be required both in termes and déedes , but after sundrie manners according to the person , the cause and the place .

If the noble man be not of authority . For if a mans better , being a noble person ( not béeing of the counsell ) shall in scornefull woords chalenge his inferiour for any thing of offence toward him , the inferiour ought by all meanes ( not abaceing himselfe too mutch ) to escuse the matter . Or if it be a fault ( suche as he can yéelde no reason for the committing of it ) to yéelde with request of pardon . But if either the escuse will not be taken , or that the inferiour had iust cause to ●ommit the offence , and that therevpon the nable man breake out in termes of repreche , as knaue , or lie : it may very well be answered thus :

I neither am knaue , nor lie any more then you , take it as you lift , Or thus .

My Lorde , I know you are a noble man , you may peraduenture ouermatch me with your traine , and yet I must scamble as well as I can too : These termes be very vnfitting , you must either forbeare them , or giue me leaue te thinke too , Or thus :

Your Lordship may bestow these liueries on those that liue by you , and cannot liue without you : if you will not haue me forget you , forget not your self , for I am much afeard I shall respect the villanie you offer me aboue the dignitie of your estate : But if a great personage shall reprooue one for any faulte , then mediation of freinds , and humble woords , as thus :

I am sorie your L. should grow to these termes : I neither am such , nor deserue to be so called of you : howbeit you be to great a state for me to contend with , but if the proudest he in this land being mine equall , or not so much my better should vse me so , if I did not my best to teache him better manner , you might well publish me for sutche as you call me : but I will beare all these and be glad of your L. fauour if I may get it , if not I must liue like a poore man , and doo as I may , Or thus .

My Lord , these be verie ill termes to offer to a Gentleman : and I must tell , you offer them to him that would not beare them at many mens hands , but I must beare them at yours , For I confesse you bee able to ouermatche me : your traine is longer then mine : if I had thought you would haue vsed me thus , your Lordship should haue pardoned me for comming to you at that time .

Now it is to be considered that wordes all this while as they breake no boanes ( so from one mutche a mans better ) they be no great disgraces : and a man may be compted the wiser to forbeare , where he knoweth he shall by power and rowtes of men or kindred , be ouermatched . But if the best vnder a Councellour should giue a blowe , a man shal be ashamed , if he doo not his best to reache him another , whatsoeuer come of it .

Now if betwéene equals , reproachefull words do rise , it must be distinguished thus :

If I giue one occasion of offence that toucheth but his profit , and he giue me reprochefull names for it , as the Lie , or Knaue : I must for my credit sake , not only requite those words with like woords , but counte the wrong mine : The best way to this is to lende him a blowe . and either offer the first blowe ( if the place serue for it ) or els chalenge him into the feild : vnlesse I can ( for pollicie sake ) driue him to chalenge me to saue my selfe from the danger of the lawe .

For fighting quarels neuer are made for profit , but for honour : and therefore whatsoeuer hurt be doone , not touching credit , the quarell must be his that receiueth the first reprochefull words : so touching the cause , the right consideration is this : If I offer the first reproche , disdaine , or dispite , the quarell is the others : his parte it is to chalenge , and I néede not to my equall to make the chalenge . But if the other giue me the first lie , or like disgrcae , it is not inough to say he lyeth againe : but I must néeds offer a blow , or chalenge the féeild .

But yet the villany may be such as he may straine good manner . In the house of his fréend , I meane in the dyning place at the bourde , or where any assembly is , a man may not offer a blowe : but if he haue cause giuen him , he shall doo well to make shewe in woords that he forbeareth the present occasion , respecting the disturbance of the companie .

This is no place to growe in termes in , if it were you would not be so braue , Or thus :

These be too great villanies to be borne , if it were not in mine owne house , where thou knowest I am able to eate thée vp , Or thus :

No into woords , this matter shall be eased anon you shall sée , Or thus :

I thanke you syr , nay take your pleasure , I could rayle too , but then I should be like such a rascall as thy selfe , tell me this soone if thou sée I forget it : but if I doo take me for such a cowardly boye as I will take thée for , till thou méete me in such a place , Or thus :

If it were not for troubling this companie , I would be your caruer of a péece of my Dagger : but doubt not but I shall finde a time for you . Or thus :

Away rascall with thy villanous words , I heare by thy great boaste I shall passe my iourney quietly at such an hower , in such a place , I know , I shall haue cause to report thée for a good quiet fellow : I , no more a doo , you know my minde .

But to conclude in this , I shall aduise the yonge Gentleman to enforme himselfe afore he haue neede by enquerie at their hands , that the experienced in that trade , that when he hath neede he may not only be prouided of courage , but also of woordes , phrase and manner to it curragiously : and in the stoutest and séemliest manner for all that I haue written hithertoo of this matter , hath bin rather to shew that in euery thing there is a meane to be vsed , in one sorte to inferiours : and in another sorte to superiours and equals : to the ende to prouoke him to learne the right manner , then of a meaning , to shew any skill of mine in the same , belonging nothing to my profession : and therefore I will now say something how he shall take the iestings , the praysyngs , and the thankes of hia superiours and equals , as things that are bothe fitter for me to write , and shall of him be oftner and sooner put in practise .

First I will discriue some sundrie manner of iesting , One is , when a man will charge his famillier freinde ( a mans famillier may be either his equall or his better , that list of curtesie to become his equall , or one somewhat his inferiour to whom he list by like curtesie to make his equall ) with some ill matter that all the companie knoweth to be vntrue .

In that kinde there is no difficultie to answere : but it is good to haue varitie of phrase , and not to answer still after one manner : to his mere equall thus :

You doo well to exercise your tongue in matters of no trouth , you may hap els to be taken for a lie teller . Or thus :

Go too , you will haue euery bodie sée what a lauish tongued fellow you be , that cannot so much as kéepe counsell of that he knoweth not , what would he doo thinke you of that he knoweth ? Or thus :

Nay I dare say you would faine haue it beléeued , for it gréeueth him that any man should be taken for honester man than himselfe , Or thus :

Go too , you were best leaue your tatling , least I fall a telling of true tales , Or thus :

Nay tell on , for I am sure all is Gospell that commeth out of those lippes of yours , Or thus :

This is nothing finely handled of you , you should haue sayd sumthing that had caried some likelyhoode with it , Or thus :

Go too , I will make you no more of my counsell séeing you be such a blab , Or thus :

Is this the trust you performe with your fréendes , to tell all and more too ? Or thus :

Houlde thy peace foole , for my honestie is so well knowen , as no body here will beléeue thée .

¶ Now in the like case to a mans better must be other phrases , as thus :

You say truthe syr I haue béen taken for a sore fellow at that , when I was a yongeman , Or thus :

If my credit were not very good , this were inough to disgrace me quite , Or thus :

It may be true that you say , but I warrant you I handle the matter so cunningly , that there is no proofe to be had of it , Or thus :

It were great pittie any body should doubt of that matter , Or thus :

Thus a mans credit is put in daunger by you , if the hearers be not the more fauourable , Or thus :

Some measure other mens trades by theyr owne , but I would be lothe any body should thinke I meane so by you .

¶ An other kinde of iesting with a mans freind is , when they charge him to haue sayd or donne something of a thirde person , that onely himselfe and his freinde knoweth to be fayned : but yet it may be tould with sutch a resemblance of truth , as the hearers may doubt whether it be true or no. In this case also it is not good to make deniall : but to vse some such phrase or rountenance as the hearers may perceiue he maketh so little accounte of it , as it néedeth no escuse or denial , as thus :

You haue lost mutch good labour now , if you be not beléeued , Or thus :

You may sell this good cheape , séeing it is of your owne making , Or thus :

I like you well , for I sée you loue to make the best of any thing , euer , when you wote not how to make the woorst , Or thus :

I pray you beléeue him in this , and you shall sée he will take such a pride in it , that he will quoyne you new stuffe euery day . Or to a mans better : Very well , you may say that and more too , if it please you , Or thus :

You must looke with a sadder countenance when you wil be beléeued .

¶ An other kinde is when they will touche one with something which is true : and though it be no great infamie , yet it may be somewhat that a man would bee loathe to confesse , and yet as loathe to be taken for a denier of that which is knowen to be true . In this case a man may answer thus :

You doo but dreame peraduentuoe , when you wake you shall finde it otherwise , Or thus :

Loe , now you haue heard say so : and béeing of a good faith , you béeleeued it straight . Or thus :

Naye no doubt but it must needes be true , if you say it , Or thus :

Did I : you speake your pleasure , a good tale in déede if it were long inough . Or to your better .

These and like speches with altringe only the sound and countenance may serue in sport or betweene sport and ernest , if a man like not to be iested with . This is but some malicious tongue , that hath founded this in your eares , I am sure you doo not beleeue it , Or thus :

Nay you may say what pleaseth you , for I will doo so mutch as confesse it , rather then you should not bee beléeued , Or thus :

I perceiue you minde to make me beholding to you for giuing me so good report , Or thus :

I know syr your good woord is euer at hand for your freinds , and I perceiue by this that I am one of them , Or thus :

I am bound to you alwaies , I trust to be able one way or other to make you amends , Or thus :

No I warrant you , there shall no man be able to catche me in such a fault , Or thus :

Well this you would doo if a mans marriage lay on it , Or thus :

Well , when I lacke one to speake well for mee , I knowe where to finde him at a néede . Or thus :

If you looke so sadly , you will make them beléue you in deede .

¶ An other kinde of iesting is , when one praiseth another for well handling of any matter , either in saying or dooing , that in deede hath not beene well , or not so well or wisely as it might haue béene : whereby the other knoweth he speaketh by contraries , this is to bee aunswered diuersly , as thus :

Nowe if another time you lacke one to doo suche a thing finely , it is but sending for me , and you shal be sped , Or thus :

It is a signe you haue a good insight with you , for I may tell to you , and yet I would be lothe to vaunt too : it was verye excellentlye well done in déede , Or thus :

Well , ye sée I loue not to bragge : but when I doo a thing very wisely , I loue sutche fréendes as wyll tell me of it , Or thus :

O naye , but if you had had the handling of it , it would haue beene exquisitiuely doone . Or to a mans better thus :

Well , if a man chaunce to shew all the wit he hath in dooing of a thing , were it reason there should be any more required ? Or thus :

I may tell to you , I did it withall the prouision of wit I had at that time in store , Or thus :

Naye , I trust I shall neuer surfet with dooing too wisely , Or thus :

I loue not to dissemble with my fréends , I meane to shew them all my wit at once .

To conclude , in any thing that may séeme to carry some defect in the dooing , if the doer can himselfe either with wit turne it to some merrie conceit , or els helpe merely to mocke him , himselfe for companie : it wil appeare either no defect , or els to be committed rather by carelesnesse , then for want of wit .

Another kinde of iesting is to praise a man to his face of things that be true in déede : as for his personage , his wit , his qualities , his good nature , or his learning : and whether this be spoken in sporte , or in earnest , it is all one : for a man must euer take vpon him as though all praises were spoken in iest : by which meanes he may in sporte arrogate them all to himselfe , with lesse glorie , then if with taking it in earnest hee should endeuour to put them from him . So as all sutch praises may bée aunswered thus with a smiling grace .

Go too , you thinke now that I wyll doo as mutche for you : and so I would if I thought you as woorthy of it as I : but you must bate me an ace of that , Or thus :

In déede I must confesse it is so : and you that want some of these rare giftes , which I am endowed with must be contented too , Or thus :

You say true , there be many proper fellowes of the name of vs , if ye knew them , Or thus :

These things be but trifles with me , in comparison of that I could doo if I list , Ot thus :

You néede say no more , for I warrant you , I beléeue all this to be true , and mutche more . Or to a mans better , thus :

I thanke you for saying so , for I hope some bodye here will beleeue it , Or thus :

Take héede syr , that you make not mee so beléeue you herein , better then you beluées your selfe : for I tell you , it will be harde to make mes thinke the contrarie . Or thus :

Beware what you saye , for it lyeth in you to bringe me in as greate an errour as this comes too , Or thus :

I know you will saye nothing , but that you bée sure is true : and therfore , I meane bothe to beléeue it my selfe , and also to perswade the audience to bée of a right faith .

¶ How a man shall answer to the praise and thanks and curtesies seriously offered by his beters or equals . The third Chapter .

THe praise that any man shall giue his fréeinds to his face , proceeding of his owne iudgement , Any prayses or thankes require rather somewhat a smyling grace then too solem , though it be a mans better . in earnest and fréendly wise , as one fréende maye in some order ( in vttering either his owne affection , or to encourage the other without touche of flatterie ) doo to an other : it may be answered to his equall fréeind , dooing it of good faith , in parte as I haue prescribed before towards his better , in dooing the like in mirthe . Or thus :

I may not take your praise for any thing , for the goodwill you beare me , blindes you . Or thus :

I pray you looke better into me , and when you finde how much you be deceiued , tell me of it , that I maye amende it , Or thus :

If another should tell me so muche , I should thinke he mockes me : but you may mocke me indéede , and passe vnespied , for the goodwill I thinke you beare me .

To a stranger , that shall praise him , or séeme to conceaue a good opinion of him thus :

It were best ( I thinke ) neuer to be better acquainted with you , least I make you of another opinion , Or thus :

I thanke you for your good opinion , I would I could beguile euerie body so conning as to make them of the same minde . And to a mans better , thus :

How muche soeuer I shall want in this , my redinesse to bée at your commaundement shall supplie it , Or thus :

The good opinion , whiche rather my good hap , then my deserts hath wrought in you , causeth you ( I thinke ) to beeléeue that to be in mee , which you wish to bee in mee . Or thus :

I account my hap good , that it pleaseth you , but to say thus mutch : for at the least , I shal be ashamed of as mutch as I finde wanting here of in my selfe , Or thus :

I cannot but take this as a freindly curtesy , by pollicie to encourage mée to seeke the attainment of that which I am borne in hand to haue alreadie . These and like , answeres may be applied also to sutche as shall bringe to his eares the good reportes of his fréeindes giuen out of him behinde his backe ( as they terme it . ) Prouided that hée picke them out according to the distinction of persons beefore described : and withal , as it is to bee consydered that all thinges spoken in a showe of mirth though it seeme to the hearer somwhat sharpe ( and peraduenture anger him ) is yet to bée dissembled and answered merely . In all other entertainements spoken seriously , a gladsome looke is a better grace then a flatteting smile . So whensoeuer a man in any thing that hee may atribute , truly to himselfe is praised to his face , though it bee spoken earnestly and of good meaning : hée ought also , in his foresaide manner of answeres : to shew sutche a smilynge grace , as it may appeare hée taketh it as spoken rather of their curtesie , then for any cause he finds in himselfe why they should so say , in speeche ( for the most parte ) the countenance , the grace , and sounde in the pronunciation is able with one selfe sentence , without altring woorde or sillable , to please or displease others , to shew himselfe wise , or make him for so mutche to séeme foolish .

Salomon affirmeth , that there is nothing that more trieth the wit of man , then the hearing of his owne praise : for saith he , the wise man is put too his triall , when he is praised to his face . And therefore for this matter I conclude , that forasmuch as many times it is harde to finde who speaketh of flatterie contrarie to his thought : who by way of mockerie , though he knowe he say true , to trie him , and who of good zeale to shew affection , and to encourage him : The surest way in this doubt is ( except to those whose fréendship by other meanes he hath experience of ) to vse his answers so , as he may make them earnest or sporte at his pleasure , as he perceiueth their asseueracion to prouoke him .

¶ How a man shall acquite himselfe towards noble persons , that shall either for his freendes sake , or his owne , offer him curtesies : or assure him of freeindship , willing him in all chaunces to be bolde with him . ¶ The .iiii. Chapter .

IN this case as in all other of intertainments , the inferiour must note in what manner , whether seriouslye or familliarly , such curtesie or intertainment be offred him : and thereafter to chuse out and shape out answers , agréeable to eche kinde : for the first , if he be a straunger to him : but not to his freends thus :

I knowe sutche , or sutch of my fréendes so mutche béeholding to you too , as hath bin sufficient to binde me to honour and loue you : and séeing it pleaseth you to extend your curtesie also towards me , I can but wish my seruice , as sufficient as my good will is : to assure you too , of my thankefull minde , Or thus :

My Lorde , I can but acknowledge that debte for my selfe ; which before I thought to owe for others of my fréends , that haue tasted of your curtesie : but I am glad that I may by this meanes shew it , which your Lordship shall finde me ready to doo , wherein soeuer I shall thinke my seruice may be acceptable , Or thus :

As this your Lordships goodnes riseth of your curtesie without any desertes , so must I confesse my selfe euer vnable to counterpeyse it : I can but acknowledge my selfe too mutch bound to you for it : and double bound if it shall please you to commaund me to the vttermost of my power , Or thus :

I humbly thanke your Lordship , I can but requite it with my seruice , and that I beséech you commaund , Or thus :

My humble thankes are but an vnequall recompence , and therefore I shall desire your L. to put my gratefull minde in triall , by commaunding my seruice , Or shortly , thus :

If my seruice may any way be ought woorth , if I may but vnderstande it , it shall not néede to be commaunded , Or thus :

I humbly thanke your L. and I beséech you commaund me , as your seruant , Or thus :

I humbly thanke your L. and I beséeche you thinke that you voutchsafe this curtesie on him that will be as readie to requite it with the vttermost of his seruice , as he that is better stored of woords . The vse of long or short sentences must be imployed according as he séeth the hearer at leasure .

¶ How when the foresayde speeches bee offered by a noble person plesantly , that is of acquaintance which must be also pleasantly answered . The .v. Chapter .

MY Lorde , you know I haue no store of eloquence : but what mayme so euer you finde in my vtterance , I can assure , you shall finde none in my good will , whensoeuer I may doo you anye seruice , Or thus :

I humbly thanke your Lordship , I warrant you I make so sure reckoning thereof , as I am more like to be boulde of your curtesie , then to request it : but I must pray your Lordship to thinke that shall be rather for want of power then of good will , Or thus :

Your Lordship must be content with my humble thankes for this time : but I would be very sorie to thinke your Lordship made not accompt of me , as of him whom you may most commaund , Or thus :

My Lord I haue had so good experience of your former curtesies , bothe towards me and other my fréends , as I had néede with my seruice to goe about to recompence some parte of that , before I come in debt for any more : But the lesse we can requite , the more we muste stand bounde .

¶ How to an equall , or but little better beeing a freend and familliar . ¶ The .vi. Chapter .

TO our fréend thus :

I am in your debt for so mutch alreadie as if you lende me any more , you will make me bankroute : and agrée with you for the tenthe parte , Or thus :

You offer me so mutche , and I can requite so little : as I see , you meane to make me an ill debter still , Or thus :

You know I haue no curious woords in stoare , but in plaine termes . I thanke you , and will requite it if I can , Or seriously thus :

I praye you thinke , that though I vse not manye woordes with you , I thinke my selfe so much beholding to you : as wherein I may pleasure you , if you commaunde me not . I shall thinke you loue me not . Or to a straunger thus :

Syr I thanke you of this curtesie , if it shall lie in me to requite it , I pray you be as boulde with me , Or thus :

Sir I must be your debter for this curtesie , till time and place serue to requite it : but in the meane time I thanke you , I pray you make the like accompt of me .

¶ How a man shall take thankes of a noble person . The .vii. Chapter .

IF thankes be offered in serious manner and for any waightie matter thus :

My Lorde , it was my goodwill , as well as my dutie , to haue done it to your best contentation : but if there be any defect in it , I pray your Lordship impute it to mine vnskilfulnesse . Or thus :

My Lord it is no reason that you thanke him , whom you ought to commaund : and specially me , that am vnable to satisfie for the tenthe parte of that dewtie or goodwill I owe you : but if there be ought done to your contentation , or that haue pleased you , I am very well a paide and sufficiently thanked , Or if merely thus :

I pray you kéepe your thankes for a thing more woorthy them : for if your Lordship bestowe so manie thankes for so small matters , you will make me looke for too manie when I shall doo you any better seruice .

¶ To a mans equall fréeind , or but little his better , thus :

Nay sir , you will marre me , if you giue me too many thankes : for then you will bring me more in debt for my thankes , that I am yours for this matter by a great deale , Or thus .

Doo fréeinds vse this curiositie in giuing thankes , I am sure it is but to teach me good manners against an other time , Or thus :

I praye you keepe thankes for straungers , and let me know whether it were to your liking or not , Or thus :

You be at too muche cost for so small a matter : I know now where to haue thankes another time when I deserue them .

¶ How a man maye giue thankes to his betters and equals . The .viii. Chapter .

IF my humble thankes were a sufficient recompence to your Lordship , I should not rest so muche in your debt as now I am bound to doo , for such a curtesie , &c. Or thus :

My Lorde , I haue humble thankes to render , for such a matter which did me great pleasure : but they be so vnequall a requitall , as I were best to ad this to the rest of your curtesies or goodnesse , and stande bound for the whole , Or thus :

I am so muche bound to your Lordship , for sutch a thing , &c. As I must thinke all the seruice I can doo too little woorthe in respect of your goodnesse shewed therein .

To a mans fréend thus :

I am too muche in your debte , to giue you thankes for sutche a thinge , &c. For till I can make some shew in déedes , I will come vpon the score with you in words , Or thus :

Though thankes be not inough for this pleasure that you haue doone me : yet I pray you allow of them till I be able to make better paiment .

¶ What manners be requisite at the Table , and what to bee shunned : for , what is to be considered in the washing before Dinner , and in the sitting downe , is set foorth in the beginning of this Direction . ¶ The .ix. Chapter .

FIrst , to pause when a man is set , and with leasure to vnfolde his Napkin , wipe his Knife , cut his breade , This ceremonie is not to be vsed , but when a man fitteth at the vpper messe with his betters , or at the second , when either the maister of the house sitteth there , or some noble person . and there to slay till either his better begin , or make countenance to him to eate where he list : and then to begin , not at the dish that shall stand right before his better , except it be offered him : neither of the daintiest meates which ( lightly ) stande lowest : but to chuse some sutche dishe to be dooing on the while , till he see whether his better will chuse or refuse some other dishe , that he had rather eate on .

Item to haue an eye to sutche as sit next beneath him and cannot reach , and peraduenture for good manner ( if they be any thing his inferiours ) wil not speake : and if they eate not , to aske whether he shal be their Caruer . But I would not haue him to be any mans Caruer , without asking him first , except it be to one so much his inferiour , as he knoweth will be glad of the curtesy he sheweth him , though he like not the meate . For as to Carue to a mans better is a presumption , so to ones equall , except by asking first the question , you know it wil be welcome to him , wil be taken for too mutche fawning , except also that for the daintinesse of the meate , or fine chusing of the best morsell , he offreth it to his very familier freind , by way of a curteous affection : for a man must for a generall rule , take héede that in a straunge place he be not to busie in offering seruice , or curtesies , though it be to his betters : but in a mans owne house or his Fathers , it cannot lightly be too mutche .

Item if a man be in his owne house , or his Fathers , where it becommeth him to giue countenance or entertainment he may to his equall , and such as be somewhat his inferiours , he may the oftner proffer them this or that meate , and drink to them , but not too much . For if a man euery time he drinketh 〈◊〉 shall drinke to one or other , It is counted a foolish grace euer to drinke to some body , and specially at the first draught . it wil be séene ▪ as though he did it for lacke of countenance : so that to vse the salutacion of the Cup aboue twise in one meale , wil bee too mutche , except the whole companie fall to quaffing . For wise men doo rather seeke to satisfy their guests with some good spéeches then with such dum sygues .

This kinde of Cup greeting ought not to bee vsed but in one of these two respects : either to make our inferiour ( to whom we meane not to vse spéeche of familliaritie ) to thinke we will doo them a curtefie : or els to our very fréende by way of congratulation . And therefore a man must neuer drinke to his better , except he be sure that by way of fréendship and familliarite he be content to become his equall , and that not with a solem or sad countenance , but with some smiling grace , that the rest may knowe it procéedeth of familiaritie , and not of presumption , yet with reuerent woords and chaunge of phrase , as thus :

My Lorde , if some yonge Nobleman :

Sir , or Madam , will it please you to giue me leaue . Or thus .

Shall I be so boulde as salute you with this Cup of Wine . Or thus :

By your leaue syr , against it next please you . Or thus :

Will you giue me leaue to remember such a one ▪ as some fréend of his . Or thus :

To plucke you out of your studies . Or thus :

Sauing your tale syr .

Item , that aboue all thinges in a straunge place , or in the presence of straungers , he attend not so gréedely , nor so continually to his feeding : but that in modest wise , 〈◊〉 either gazing too longe in another mans face : or yet hanging his head continually 〈◊〉 his trencher : he hath both his eye and his eare so redy , that nothing is saide or doone at the bourde , but he may perceiue it , for his learning , that good is to follow , that ill is to eschew . And when he seeth any thing vncomely , to examine himselfe , whether he haue not the same grace himselfe : and also to doo the like , whensoeuer he heareth any man dispraised . For most men know what is comly or vncomely in another : But many for lacke of due obseruation in themselues , mocke or dyspraise in another , the same which others mock in them : and the rather for their so dooing .

Item , that he pawse betwéene meate and meate , and neuer to carue himselfe , either of meate or bread , while his mouth is full : nor till he haue swallowed the last morsell .

Item that he fill not his mouthe so full of meate as he cannot holde his lippes together while he is chawing : for other wise , men shall looke into his mouthe , and see the meate rowle vp and downe while he is eatinge : which is a fowle sight , and loathesome : and for that cause , a man must forbeare to speake with meate in his mouthe , except he haue so little , as he bee sure to hide it in his mouthe while he is speaking .

Item , while his better telleth him any tale , to cease eating : bethe while he heareth , and while he answereth him .

Item , if he be prouoked to laughe in the presence of his betters to doo the same with as little noyse as may be : and likewise in the company of straungers , for too lowde a laughter , specially , for slender occasions , doo make wisemen counted foolish of sutch as know them not .

Item , when 〈◊〉 man will tell a mery tale let him 〈◊〉 it so a●●●●selfe be not the first that shall laughe at it . 〈◊〉 smiling sound to make men know he speaketh but in sporte , is good : but a fained laughter is ill becomming . A hartie laughter ( so the matter be worth it ) is allowable .

Item he must beware that while another tell a tale , or make iestures : that his wits be not caried away , so as he gaze continually in his face , and make the same countenances which he séeth the other doo : for that will make a man counted doultish .

Item if he be constrained to yawne , teache , belche , cough , snéese , clense the nose , or spit either at the bourde , or in the presence of his betters or straungers : he must suppresse the sound , and shadow the sight , as muche as he may conuiently without making it to nice .

Item in caruing himselfe or others , he must not embrew too many of his fingers , nor his thombe : nor wallow his meate vp and down to much in the sauce , because in so dooing a man shall washe his fingers in the saufe , which others will loathe , specially straungers .

Now to conclude , though a man either at home or among his fréends , may vse what manner he list , without obseruing all these ceremonies : yet it shal be verye good somwhat to enure himselfe by dayly custome : otherwise he shall in presence forgette bothe them and himselfe

¶ How a man shall pacifie his freeind , his better , or his equall : if he haue giuen him vnwillinglye any cause of offence . ¶ The .x. Chapter .

IF for a light cause , then merely thus : I am sure you take it not in earnest , or thinke I meant otherwise then in the best part : for if you doo , you shall doo me great wronge , Or thus : By my trouthe I did , or saide it to no such ende , as you take it : and therefore I pray you thinke of it , as I meant it . Or thus :

If I had thought it could haue bin so much mistaken , I would haue bin more wary : but let it suffice you that I ment but well and fréeindly , for otherwise I did it not I assure you : Or carnestly for some greater matter , then thus :

My hap is ill , that of so good a meaning , should fall out so ill conceiuing , or so ill successe : for that I did or sayde , was as I would haue doone to my very fréende , or would haue had doone to my selfe , it restes in your choice to beléeue me : but if you doo not , you shall wronge your selfe , as well as me , in mistrusting me without a cause , Or thus :

I can but tell you and assure you on my faithe , I meant thus , Or thus :

If I haue giuen you any cause to thinke other wise , or if it haue fallen out contrarie to mine expectation : I am not only soarie for it , but I will be readie to make any recompence I can , Or to ones better thus :

Truly sir , it was not my intent to doo herein anye thing that might offende : but I will yéelde , that it is fault inough that I vsed no more circumspection , but that you may conceiue ill of it : you néede not to giue me any penance , for that my repentance is so murche , Or thus :

If you knew my minde , you would put me in trust for reuenging this faut : for I shall be angrie with my selfe this good while for it .

¶ How a man shall shift of reproches or tauntes offred betweene sporte and earnest , by enuious and scornefull persons , that will seeme to doo it so cunninglye , as the other shall haue the taunt , and yet at his owne pleasure will denie it . The .xi. Chapter .

THe best way is , if he can touche the same party as néere , without séeming to be angrie : but if he know nothing perticulerly to charge him or to mock him withall , then , to scorne him beetwéene sporte & anger againe , as thus : Oh finely handled , were you borne so . Or thus :

Iesus who would haue thought you coulde haue throwen so harde to hit your selfe , Or thus :

I dare say , you weene you haue spoken very trimly now . Or thus :

You haue made a great speake sir , Or thus :

That is quoth you , Or thus :

I thanke you of your cost , Or thus :

It is but your good nature to take or expounde it so . Or thus :

As I remember I desired you not to say that for me : but yet you shall finde me too kinde harted to dye in your debt . Or thus :

Did any bodye teache you to say so , or comes it of your mother wit .

¶ Now if they shall replie , and go about to make it séeme they meane simply , then thus :

I dare say you doo , and therefore I thanke you as hartely . Or thus :

Why I trust you thinke not that I doubte of that , Or thus :

Why I take it so and therefore I commend you for it and so turne it to mirthe agayne , if the other will needs haue it so . But if the other will prosecute it with sharpe tauntes , vnder a fléeryng or laughing countenance , then thus :

Naye I am not skilled in iesters arte , tell me your minde in earnest , and you shall finde me ready to make you such sporte as I dare : Or thus :

I will tell you , if you will néedes become a Iester to make Gentlemen sporte : It were best to call some other to helpe countenance you , that is of your facultie , for in faith I am nothing apt for you at this time .

FINIS .