WIthin the large Circumference of this great Theater , and Stage of the World , all people , Kingdomes , and Nations , Males or Females , of all ages and degrees , are Actors of such parts as they have studied , either from the Rules and Inspirations of Vertue , or from their owne inclinations , and Sathans suggestions to Vice . And the Devill w●ll knowing our fraile and weake conditions and instability , doth every day and houre ( like a cunning Iugler or a Gipsy ) devise new Tumbling casts and feats of Activity 〈◊〉 allure and delight the minds of as many as he findes to be addicted to take pleasure in his Le●gerdemaine . Hee gives a false sweete-seeming rellish to the Drunkards Cup , he ●ars the Glut●on against the day of slaughte● , he tips the Blaspheamers tongue with Oaths and Curses , he wher s the Slanderers and backbiters speech , and makes it keene and cutting ; hee teaches the rare and ancient Ar● of Lying , ( and hath 〈◊〉 innumerable ●umber of apt 〈…〉 Scholl●●s ) hee turnes ang 〈…〉 venge , Revenge into Murd 〈…〉 to Impie●y , Truth into Theft● Love into Jealousie , Jealousie into hatred and madnesse ; and ( in a word ) to summe up all together , the Devill doth labou● dayly , and all his endeavour is wholly bent to make worke for the Hangman , and draw soules to his Infernall Kingdome .

And amongst all the ●icks and sleights which this Grand cunning Master of mischiefe doth use , to bring us to destruction with all , there is no one policy of his that is more prevalent and advantagious to him , than is the sowing of discord and debate betwixt Man and Wife ; and although he hath a thousand innumerable wayes for the effecting of his damnable projects and purposes , yet Jealousie is the chiefe and maine Engine to bring it so to passe , that modesty shall be turn'd into madnesse , peace into strife , and love into hatred and mischiefe , as shall be shewed in this short following Treatise .

About the latter end of August last , 1638. this hellish fire of Jealousie did most strangely inflame five Women , whom my Pen should not name , nor should they be knowne by any writing of mine , but that they and their mad and barbarous proceedings are too much true , and too many wayes scattred and spread abroad by sundry Pens and Tongues , some of them making the matter that was ( and is ) bad enough already , worse ; some mincing it , to make it better ; some for affection , some for malice ; some for flattery , and some as their idle and various humours please , doe report it as they list to frame it , not caring whether they speake or write truth or falsehood . The matter hath beene Rim'd upon beyond Reason , and therefore I hold it Reason it should be related with truth , and thus it was .

At the time , or neare the time aforesaid , one Master Evans , a Barber in Drury-lane , did chance to meete with one Ioane Ilsley in the Streete , and belike the woman had formerly kept the said Evans his wife when shee lay in Child-bed , in which season ( of Gander-month or Wander-month ) perhaps the suspicious woman began to be a little inkindled with the sparkles of jealousie : but suspicion is no proofe● but Evans afterwards , when hee by chance once met the woman , offered her ● Pint of Wine , which after some d●nyall was at last accepted : So in they went to a Taverne ( the Signe of the Phoenix ) n●●re the lower end of Drury-lane , behind , or on the back-side of the Bell , which is an Inne and a Taverne in the Easterne part of the Strand : But they being over their one Pint , in a low Roome , and a Drawer standing at the Tables end , the one sitting on one side of the Boord , and the other on the other side , so that there neither was nor could bee any immodesty said or done at that time : but some busie-body or other went and told Evans his wife , that her Husband was at the Taverne drinking with Ioane Ilsley , whereupon she went in a heate to the Phoenix , and found them there , upon whom shee bestowed such hot and hasty language as her tongue could afford , which made them breake company , ( some of the words were , she told the said Ioane that she was naught with her Husband ) But some few daies after , Mistris Evans ( being still jealously angry ) did breake her minde to some women , her neighbours , and withall made a shew to Ioane that her anger was past against her , so that agreement was made , that a Pigge should be eaten at Mistris Evans her house at night , and that in a faire seeming way Ioane Ilsly should be sent for as a loving guest invited to the Pigge .

At the time appointed the Pigge was roasted , and the women dissembled , were assembled , and simple Ioane was sent for , who ( poore wench ) not suspecting the sharpnesse or sowernesse of the Feast , suspecting nothing , went to them , and being come amongst them , they seemed very friendly and courteously to entertaine and bid her welcome : to whom Mistris Evans said , 〈◊〉 prethee Ioane , thou art well acquainted with my house , goe up into the upper Chamber , and fetch downe some stooles for us to sit on , so innocent Ioane went quickly up the staires for stooles , and presently there followed her three of the five Women , to wit , Evans Wife , one Cox his Wife , and one Fosters Wife ; these three had with them a per●iworth of Birchin Rods , after whom followed the other two , to wit , one Smiths wife a Broker , & one Mistris Lee a widdow , then they beganne to revile her in most strange manner , and withall to lay hands on her , to plucke her cloathes violently off from her body , but she resisted and strived and strugled with them as long as she could , till at last they tore her apparrell off from her , then having her naked , they beganne their execution , some to hold her , and some to whippe her , so that the smart , and their harsh usage inforc'd her to beginne to cry ; which they perceiving stopt her mouth ●ith a clout or a handkerchiefe : Then ●the first penny-worth of rods being wasted to the st●mps they fetch'd , or sent for two penny-worth more● and after they had whipped them out upon her , they sent for one penny-worth more : ( still stopping her mouth , that her crying might not be heard ) Shee being thus naked , and all gore-bloody , they cald up 〈…〉 bade him bring up a Bason of water , & a Razor , which the boy did ; but when he came within the Chamber doore he was abashed and ashamed , and threw downe the Razor and Bason , running downe the staires as fast as hee could : the one of the women tooke up the Razor , meaning to doe I know not what with it . But Ioane being used thus harshly by them , and in bodily feare of some worse abuse , did strive against them , in which scuming shee received a cut , or wound in her backe , neare the shoulder , with the Razor .

This extreamity being past , these Women ( if I may so call them ) had 〈◊〉 much modesty as to make fast 〈◊〉 Apron , or halfe a Kir●●e before her , over the fore-part of her body , and as she was , being cut , whipped , and all bloody over , they haled and thrust her downe the staires , and pump'd her at a Pumpe which was in Evans his backe ●ide : after that they thrust her into the streete , ( i● being betweene ten , and eleven of the Clocke at night ) and from the streete ( or Dr●ry Lane ) they puld and ●ug●●her ( with her haire about her eares ) into a Court called Reine-Deere Court , where at a Pumpe they held her under the spout , and pump'd Water upon her , and us'd her more shamefully than is fit to write of , still stopping her mouth with a clout● also in the Yard , at the last Pumpe , there were two men that did abuse her , one Smith was one : but shee striving with them had her Kirtle or Apron torne off from her , so ●●at shee had nothing to cover her ●●rkasse , but the darknesse of the Night .

At last this bu●ling was overheard by an honest Coach-man , whose name is Thomas Finch , who marvailing what it might bee that made such a stirre at that time of night : hee and his Wife comming to the Pumpe , finding a Woman in such a pittifull plight , so handled by such rough and pittilesse Creatures , he ( in humanity ) rescued her from them , and suddenly pluck'd off his Horse-mans Coate , and coverd her nakednesse : whereupon her Adversaries ( or lawlesse executioners ) all forsooke her , and dispers't themselves , it is no great matter whither .

The Coach-man demanded of the poore abused creature what she was , and wherefore they had used her so cruelly : and she answer'd , that shee was a poore yong Woman that did get her living by Nursing and keeping of Childe-bed Women , and also that sometimes shee did attend and kee●● sicke folkes , and that she at that ti●● was a Keeper or Waiter on a si●ke Gentleman ( a Captaine ) at the signe of the Helmet in the Strand : he asked her further where her cloathes were , and wherefore those women had us'd her so ? and she answer'd him , that they had torne and rent her cloathes in pie●es , and also that shee had five shillings of money in one of her Pockets : wherupon the Coach-man did pitty her hard estate and usage , and withall did bring her presently home to the aforesaid Signe of the Helmet , where shee dwelt , and doth remaine yet to this twelfth of October , 1638. being much bruised and hurt , and spets blood .

Now Reader I imagine you have not heard of such a mad crew of Shavers , Whippers , and politicke Pumpers ; nor doe I thinke that any Penne , or relation of tongue or History doth mention the like .

After shee had recoverd a little ●●rength , she procured Warrants from 〈◊〉 Justice of the Peace ; which when the matter was heard and understood , they were bound all of them to answer for this outrage to the Woman , the spoiling of her , and her Apparrell , and the losse of her money ; but they did put in good Baile for their appearance at the Sessions , and on the eight and twentieth of September they went to Westminster to save their Baile and Recognisence : ( Quarter Sessions being then holden there ) from which tryall , they have by a Writ of Sursarara remov'd their cause up to the right honourable Court of Kings Bench , but as they were returning homeward , some women ( belike that had heard of their desperate and unmannerly exployts ) as soone as they saw them passe did raile on them , and revile them most scoldingly eloquent ; and withall so embroydered them with dirt , which they cast at them , that they seemed more like Ladies of the soyle , than women of any meane degree . And thus have these five foolish women run●● themselves into sixe pecks of trouble : How it will bee answered and ended time will shew , if the Reader hath the patience to stay so long .

These are the fruits of mad-braind , Hare-braind , shallow-braind jealousie ; for as the Pedegree of cure ( or remedy ) may bee thus delineated : Itch begat Scratch ● Scratch was the Father of Scabbe ; Scabbe begat Sore , to whom Smart succeeded ; then Smart was the Father of Paine ; Paine begat Griefe , who was the Sire of Care , and Care begat Cure : So Idle thoughts are the fathers of Whisperings ; Whisperings begat Pratling , Babling , Talking , Lying , Slandering ; these Mongrels are for the most part begotten at Gossippings , and are the incurable Issues or Fistulaes of wicked mindes : from them Fame sends out Rumour , Report , and Heare-say ; and they set Malice , Backebiting , and Slander on worke , who are so double diligent in their damnable Devices , that they doe never cease working , till such time as they have h●led Jealousie by the eares out of the Dungeon of Hell : and sure there is no Tiger or Beare when they are robbed , or bereaved of their Whelpes , so divelish mad as a jealous man or woman .

It hath beene indeed too often knowne that Beauty hath beene the ruine of Chastity , ( if grace guide and guard it not ) and as the flattery of men may overcome the weaknesse of women , so the wiles and snares of subtile Strumpets have intangled and ruin'd too many men ; for ●ole , Deianeira , and Omphale , were too hard for Hercules , and one of them made him lay by his Club , and fall to spinning with a Dista●fe . The Queene of Love subdu'd the god of Warre , and the same Venus naked , did foile Pallas who was arm'd on Mount Ida : and whosoever hee be that sowes kisses on such lips as are lasciviously manur'd with the dung of temptation , shall be sure to reape 〈◊〉 Harvest either of contempt , diseases , beggery , and defamation ; for the world is full of examples and presiden●s of many thousand , that have reap'd such a crop as they have sowne .

That man that is yoak'd with a scold , that will be jealous without cause ; o●●ly because she will be so ; and for that surmise and slander shee like a Devill doth make her house her Husbands continuall Hell : Surely such a man is partly happy , if withall hee hath the vertue of Patience , ( as wife Socrates had with his Xantippe ) for hee that is match'd with such a Fiend , hath no need to care where he goes , nor what society he keeps ; nor hath he reason to be affraid of any harme that any wicked company can doe him , for the Devill himselfe will not hurt him that is match'd with one of his Sister . But if any shuttle-witted fellow , that is wedded to a chaste and modest woman , and is so farre troubled with a wild buzzing ●●d-flye in his braines , that he nothing but dreames of supposed invisible Hornes , such a kind of Cacadudgeon C●xcombe , doth justly deserve to have beene match'd to a wench whose heeles had beene lighter than his head , and then hee might meritoriously have made a Combe of a Fire-forke , and worne an Oxe-feather in his Hat without wrong or injury : in a word , there is nothing can grieve or torment the heart either of a good man or woman , than to finde their truth , constancy , loyalty , and honest integrity suspected or question'd ; for let it be truely weighed and considered , what hurt or occasion of suspicion can be for a man to give a woman a part of one Pint of wine , in an open low roome in a publick Taverne ? it is not to bee doubted but such accidents doe happen dayly , at the least a thousand , and yet for all that there is not one Whoore or Cuckold the more : but when as rashnesse addes waxen wings ( like those of Icarus ) of indiscretion and inconsideration , and that either the man or the woman are mounted or soar'd aloft to the height of Love-killing hell-borne jealousie , then doth the furious heate and flame of rage melt those deceitfull and suspicious wings , wings whereby the jealous party drops and tumbles downe headlong into the bottomelesse Ocean of irreperable disgrace and infamy .

The envy and inveterate hate of wicked women is almost past thought ; Envy is the mistresse of injustice ; it stirreth and inciteth both the thought and the hand to all ill and wicked actions : and that envy which is secret and hidden , is more to bee feared than that which is open and manifest : such was the secret malice of this Barbers wife , whose jealousie did burne a great while within her , and at length her envy did burst out into a flame , and so hath brought ruine and disgrace to her and her Husband , which is so farre distant : And if any woman be so full of wrath and revengefull as this woman is , and her associates , and especially if they know that they have power of command , or authority , they will soone bring all to destruction : for they will plot either to poyson , stob , or else some ther way make their will and passions their Law : and therefore I advise all to learne this saying , rather to be affraid of that renowne and credit which is dishonest and shamefull , for they plotted this businesse , because they would he talk'd on hereafter . Suppose this I●●●e had beene guilty of a fault , must these Women be their owne revengers , their owne witnesses , their owne Judges ? must they have the Law in ●●eir owne hands , thus to usurpe● 〈◊〉 wholsome Lawes , and make havo●● of a woman in this un●ill mann●●● Women shall I call them● nay , rather monsters : or else some evill spirit in their shapes , to commit such inhumane and unnaturall acts as these : such actions they be that are past example , nay ; never the like heard of , to commit such uncivill actions , and upon their owne Sexe , whose civill carriage should be example to the younger sort ; their actions were such , as I said before , that I blush to relate them , and ought not to be divulg'd no lowder than a whisper : The Heathens that knew not God would not have done the like : nay , the wilde beasts of the wildernesse would have pursu'd to de●th such beasts as rapin'd and live upon the spoyle of other beasts ; they themselves punish , and shall these creatures hate these acts which a Christian commits , and we commit them ? but their punishment no doubt will be inflicted upon them according to their deserts ; and my second part , which I will shortly publish , shall shew their confessions and their punishments : And so I end this Relation , wishing their sufferings may be an example to others , that none dare attempt such uncivill and immodest actions hereafter .