The rogue: or The life of Guzman de Alfarache. VVritten in Spanish by Matheo Aleman, seruant to his Catholike Maiestie, and borne in Seuill

THE ROGVE : OR THE LIFE OF GVZMAN DE ALFARACHE .

WRITTEN IN SPANISH by MATHEO ALEMAN , Seruant to his Catholike Maiestie , and borne in SEVILL .

LONDON , Printed for Edward Blount . 1623.

AL ILLVSTRE SENNOR , DON IVAN ESTRANGWAYES ESPEIO DE LA VIRTVD Y NOBLEZA , Cauallero Titulado , y gentilhombre de la Camara de Su Serenissima Magesdad de la gran Bretan̄a .

Sennor mio ; No he querido encomendarmi Picaro á la protecion de los Reyes , y Principes . Porque , demas que no conuienen tales personas à sus Magesdades y Grandezas , an hecho particulares Leyes muy rigorosas , y Pragmaticas seueras contra los que lo hazen .

Ni tampoco a los Consejeros de Estado . Porque , aunque à caso los tengan , no se siruen , ni gustan dellos , si no por su proprio interes , ò razon de Estado .

A los Iuezes , menos . Porque son enemigos mortales de la pobreza , y de los , que no tienen dineros .

Pero , à vuestra Sennoria si ; ( aunque no sin reçelo ) por amor de los grillos , y çien açotes bien pagados . Siendo vuestra Sennoria Gouernador principal en su tierra , y vno de los Corregidores de Loçanos , y Picaros . Yo se muy bien , que vuestra Sennoria puede echar mano à mi Picaro , y agarrarle , para lleuarle à la Carcel , y detenerle en ella . Yo confiesso , que era todo quanto malo se puede dezir . Arrojado , y desuanecido , inconsiderado , descuydado , confuso , desordenado , indiscreto . Era reboltoso , y amigo de nouedades . Tenia sutilezas , inuenciones , y engan̄os . Era importuno , y porfiado , semejante al nauio , que anda dando bordes en la ribera , y nunca acaba de tomar puerto . Era como vna pared , que cada momento estaua para desmoronarse , y caer en tierra . No tenia firmeza en su voluntad ; no tomaua resolucion , en lo que auia de hazer ; No Sabia refrenar sus passiones ; Hinchosele la cabeça de viento , desuaneçio en embelecos ; Dando consejo à los otros , no sabiendo los tomar para si . Donde llegò à triste fortuna , y suerte , a Lazeria , mezquindad , de sarrapamiento , estrema miseria , y necessidad , y en fin , à las Galeras .

Con todo esso como los Picaros tienen entrada en las Casas de Sen̄ores , no desconfio , que este ninno de la Piedra , serà bien recebido de vuestra Sennoria , y en toda verdad , deue estimarse en mucho .

Porque , aunque habla mucho , pero no sin sustancia . No se puede dezir ser todo hoja , y no tener fruto . O , que nuestro Picaro es gran Charlatan ; que tiene muchas palabras , y en ellas poco de que echar mano , que sea de consideracion . Tira à dos hitos , por diuersos caminos , dando à entender vna cosa con sus palabras , y haziendo lo contrario en sus obras . Hallarà vuestra Sennoria ( como dizen ) entre Col , y Col , Lechuga . Variedad de cosas para entretener , y recrear , para que no nos enfademos , tratando siempre vna cosa . Trayendo tanta variedad de razones , quantas colores tiene vn Pintor . No es como Elecho , yerua sin tallo , sin flor , y sin simiente . Las rasuras , que salen de las pieças de açofar , quando se tornean , en si valen poco , y quando las recogen , hazen bulto ; pero echadas à derretir , se bueluen en muy poco . Tales son las palabras vanas de los Charlatanes , y Habladores . Que , si los apurais , tienen poca sustancia .

Pero este Picaro , no es holgaçan , que esta papando viento , como los fuelles . Grande es el prouecho , la vtilidad , y ganancia , que del se saca . Estremado es en sus dichos , y donayres , y comprehende , y encierra muchas moralidades , vnas dentro de otras . Es muy graçioso : Es ( como dizen ) vna sal .

Diran algunos ; Que es todo intricado , confuso , mal-digesto , reuefado . Mienten . Antes todo al contrario .

Por el hilo , se saca el ouillo : y por la muestra , y principio de vna cosa , se conoçe lo demas della .

O que natural fuerça de entendimiento ! O , como da en el blanco ! Como tira à punteria . No tira , ( como otros ) à tiento , à troche moche , de donde diere , si no con orden , y buen concierto . Aduertiendo à todos , que no ensucien sus manos en cosas viles , ni hagan cosa fea , O indecente ; si no , que se recojan , y que paren , y obedescan al freno de la razon .

Mi Picaro , es hombre de bien . No es de aquellos Vellacos de Madrid , que pregonan vino , y venden vinagre . De los , que prometen cosas buenas y altas , y despues son ordinarias y friuolas .

No digo mas , sino que me he engolfado en vn negocio muy dificultoso . Perdone me vuestra Sennoria . No pude menos . Quales las cadenas , quales las ataduras de es labones nigeridos vnos en otros , son la importunidad de los Amigos , y la propria promesa ? Estando desta manera empen̄ado , me fue menester para satisfazer con mi obligacion ; y auiendome engargantado el pie en el estriuo , no pude tan facilmente sacarlo .

Yo me he puesto las faldas en cinta , para passar mi Carrera ; Se mi poco valor , y flaqueza , y que alo menos , si no he errado , he tropeçado . Pero , si vuestra Sennoria sera seruido de tenerla por buena , y suficiente , y que he hecho mi deuer sin falta , O Fealdad , el Torneo no sera malo , teniendo Padrino tan noble para abonarme .

El que buelue las palabras y conceptos de vna lengua en otra à menester tener fidelidad , prudencia , y sagacidad , y ygual noticia de ambas Lenguas , y lo que en ellas se dize por alusiones , y terminos metaforicos , y mirar lo , que en esta otra Lengua se puede corresponder . Muchos vierten ; y las mas vezes , peruierten .

El Picaro , esta trasladado . Plega à Dios , que di mi mano no sea mal tradado . Traducido , si ; Si traslucido , bien esta . El Picaro de Aleman ha mudado su Vestido ; su Traje , no es al modo de Espanna , si no de Inglaterra . Si yo le he puesto en su punto y ser , muy venturoso soy . Guarde me Dios , de mala noche , y parir hija . Ay tal desconsuelo en el mundo como trabajar mucho en vn negocio , y alcabo no suceder como se deseaua .

En algunos lugares , hallo mi Guzmanico escuro como la noche . Pero , yo he hecho algunos Escolios , para quitar los Escollos . Espero buen puerto . Pero , si à caso se em braueçe la Mar de Maldiçion , si las Olas creçen , con la espuma de los Deslenguados , si este mi pobre Vaxel no tiene fuerça para contrastar las Tempestades amenazadas , me desnudare , y arrojare con impetu y furia en la Mar , dexandole à la inclemencia destos Toruellinos , y espiritus turbulentos . Confiando , que vuestra Sennoria me dara la mano , para Sacarme fuera de vn Abismo tan peligroso , no sufriendo se anegue y perezca en la Mar , ahogandose en ella , vno que es tan

Aficionado à vuestra Senoria ; como Don Diego Puede — Ser ; de Santa Maria Magdalena .

TO DON FRANCISCO DE ROIAS , MARQVESSE DE POZA , LORD OF THE HOVSE DE MONCON , President of the Councell de HAZIENDA to his Maiestie , and the Courts belonging there-vnto .

OF all those things in this world , which are wont amongst men to cause the greatest feare , I know not any that may be greater , or of equall compare to that of an euill intention , and secret ill meaning . And by so much truely the more , by how much it shall bee the more deepely rooted in those that are of obscure Bloud , humble Birth , and base mindes . For in such , it is vsually more forcible , and lesse corrigible . But both of them , the one and the other , are like vnto Hunters ; who ( taking vp some close standing shadowed ouer with boughes ) lye in wait for our destruction , and euen then , after that we haue receiued our deaths wound , we are neuer awhit the neerer in discouering whence our hurt came . These are Basilisks , whom if we view them first , their poyson loseth its force , and is of so much the lesse preiudice ; but if they once gaine the hand of vs ( by getting a kinde of dominion ouer vs ) they bring vs in danger of our vtter vndoing . They are a scandall to a Common-wealth , the promoting Knaues of Innocence , and the very executioners of Vertue ; against whom the wisedome of man is not of power to preuaile , or able to guard it selfe . Of these kinde of men , from whose subtill gins ( as traps tending to death ) no person liues secure , I ( for mine owne part ) haue euer been more afraid then of any other beasts , how fierce or hurtfull so euer . And more especially in this present occasion , wherein a large field is laid open vnto them , wherein they may sow the seed of their venome , calumniating mee ( at the least ) with the reprochfull attribute of an ouer-bold and rash-headed fellow , that I should presume to offer to so powerful a Prince , so poore a gift . Not considering , that this my boldnesse first grew from that necessitie , where-into their feare had put mee . For , as those Cities that are weakely fortified , meanely mann'd , and of small force for defence , haue so much the greater need of braue and worthy Captaines to maintaine them , by resisting the furious violence , and sharpe assaults of their enemies : So in like manner was it needfull for me , to helpe my selfe , and make vse of your Lordships protection , in whom , with so much splendour and glory , are made manifest to the worlds view , those three parts ( Vertue , Blood , and Power ) whereof true Noblenesse is composed . And because it is a peculiar propertie belonging there-unto , to fauour and protect those , who ( as to a Sacred place ) with-draw themselues thither for their better safety , I rest so secure vnder the shadow of your Lordships protection , and rely so much vpon your noble disposition , that you stretching out the wings of your accustomed clemency , my booke shall vnder them ( as Chickens vnder the Hens wing ) remaine free from those that shall seeke to wrong it : And together therewith obtaine this happinesse , that you making that great , which in it selfe is little , admitting a poore Picaro , to become a Courtier , shall giue a being to that which had none before , a worke of such Greatnesse and Excellencie , as shall make your Lordship to appeare the more . Whose long and happy life is desired of no man more then

MATHEO ALEMAN .

To the Uulgar .

TO me it is no new thing ( though perhaps it be to thee ) to see ( O thou vertue-hating Vulgar ) the many bad friends that thou hast ; that little , which thou deseruest , and that lesse , which thou vnderstandest : To behold , how biting , how enuious , how couetous thou art ; how quick in defaming , how slowe in honoring ; how certain in ill , how vncertaine in good ; how facile to fly out , and how hard to bee curbed in . What Diamond is there so hard , which thy sharpe teeth doe not grind to powder ? What vertue scapes Free from thy venemous tongue ? What piety doe thy actions protect ? What defects doth thy cloake couer ? What Treacle doe thy eyes behold , which doe not like the Basilsske impoyson ? What Flower , though neuer so cordiall , euer entred thorow thy eares , which in the Hiue of thy heart thou didst not conuert into poyson ? What sanctitie hast not thou calumniated ? What innocencie hast not thou persecuted ? What singlenesse of heart hast not thou condemned ? What iustice hast not thou confounded ? What truth hast not thou profaned ? In what greene field hast thou set thy foot , which thou hast not defiled with thy filthy luxuries ? And if it were possible to paint forth to the life the true fashion of hell , and the torments thereof , thou onely , in my iudgement , mightst ( and that truely ) be its perfectest counterfet . Thinkest thou ( peraduenture ) that passion blindeth mee , that anger moueth me , or that ignorance violently thrusts me on ? No verily . And if thou couldst but be capable of seeing thy owne errour , but suffer thy selfe to be informed , ( onely but with turning thy head aside ) thou shouldst finde thy actions aeternized , and euen from Adam reproued , as thou thy selfe art already condemned . But alas , what amendment may bee expected from so inveterated a Canker ? Or who is he , that can be so happy , as to vnclue himselfe from this Labyrinth , or to vnseaze himselfe from thy griping talons ? I fled from the confused Court , and ●…hou followedst me into a poore Village ; I with-drew my selfe into solitarie Shades , and there thou madest a shot at me , and drew'st thy venemous shafts at mee ; neuer letting me alone , but still vexing and pursuing me , to bring me vnder thy rigid Iurisdiction , and tyrannicall Empire . I am well assured that the protection which I carry with mee , will not correct thy crooked disposition , nor giue that respect , which in good manners thou owest , to his noble qualitie , nor that in confidence thereof I should get free from thy arresting hand . For thou despising all goodnesse and ciuilitie , ( which are things that neuer yet came within the reach of thy better consideration ) hast rashly and vnaduisedly bitten so many illustrious and worthy persons , extolling some for their wit ( though idle ) accusing others for their lightnesse , and defaming a third of lyes and false-hoods . Thou art Mus campestris , a very Field-mouse , and no better . Thou art still nibbling on the hard rinde of the sowre and vnsauourie Melons , but when thou commest to those that are sweet and wholesome , and fitter for nourishment , thy stomake fals into a loathing , thou canst not feede on them without surfetting . Thou imitatest that importunate , troublesome , and eare-offending Fly ( through his vntuneable buzzing ) the Scarabee , who not dwelling on the sweeter sort of Flowers , flyes from forth the delicate Gardens , and pleasant Woods , for to settle on a Cowe-sheard , fall vpon a dunghill , and other such like noysome places . Thou doest not make any stay vpon the high moralities of diuiner wits , but onely content'st thy selfe with that which the Dogge said , and the Foxe answered ; this cleaues close vnto thee ; this , when thou hast read it , remaineth still with thee , and hauing made it once thine owne , is neuer againe forgotten . O vnfortunate Foxe , that thou must be likened to one of these , and must , like these , be reuiled and persecuted , like an vnprofitable and mischieuous member in a Common-wealth ! I will not inioy the priuiledge of thy honours , nor the freedome of thy Flatteries , though thou wouldst inrich me with all the wealth of thy praises . For the commendation of wicked men , is but shame and dishonour . And I rather desire the reprehension of the good ; because the end for which they doe it , is like vnto themselues , then thy depraued estimation , which cannot bee but bad . Thou takest too much libertie vnto thee , thou art an vnbridled beast , a head-strong Iade ; and , if occasion of matter bee offered vnto thee , thou runn'st away with it , thou kick'st , and fling'st , thou tramplest mens good names vnder thy feete , thou breakest all bounds of modestie , and tearest all in pieces that stands in thy way , and whatsoeuer else shall seeme good vnto thee . But these faire Flowers , which thou so scornefully treadest vnder thy feete , crowne the Temples of the vertuous , and giue a fragrant and odoriferous smell in the nostrils of those that are noble . The deadly razour-wounding slashes of thy sharpe tuskes , and the mortall strokes made by thy hands , shall heale the man that is discreet , vnder whose warme shade , I shall happily bee defended from all the stormes and tempests of thy blustring malice .

To the discreet Reader .

IT is vsuall with some , that are troubled in their sleepe with sad and melancholy dreames , to striue so strongly with their imagination ( that without beeing otherwise moued at all ) after they are awakened and come to themselues , remaine so broken and tyred out , as if they had wrestled and tugged hand to hand with some braue fierce Bull. And such a one for all the world doe I finde my selfe in getting out of my former Proeme , my mind still beating vpon the Barbarisme , and dis-equall number of those ignorant Dolts , to whose censure I submitted my selfe , it faring therein with me , as with him , who thrusts himselfe into a voluntary exile , hauing not the power afterwards in his owne hands to reuerse his banishment . I did ingage my selfe by promise to compose this booke , and now I am inforced to hold my honest word . I must confesse I made a false Vie , and did set vp my rest in iest , but now I am driuen to see it in earnest . For it is the word , that bindes the Player . I know full well ( considering the rudenesse of my wit , and shortnesse of my studies ) that it had beene very fit in me to feare the Carreere that I am to make ; and that this libertie and licence of mine is more then needed , and might well haue beene spared ; But considering with my selfe , that there is not any Booke so bad , out of which some good may not be drawne , it may be possible , that in that wherein my wit was wanting , the zeale which I had to profit others , may supply that defect , by working some vertuous effect ; which happinesse if I light vpon , it shall bee a sufficient reward of my greater paines , and make this my boldnesse , m●…re worthy your pardon . I shall not need with the discreet to vse long Proemes , nor prolixe circumlocutions . For neither can the eloquence of words vainely worke him , nor the force of speech dotingly perswade him to more then what is iust ; nor doth his felicitie consist in the procuring of his fauourable Censure . I remit my selfe to his correction ; I craue his helping hand to vphold my weakenesse , and put my selfe wholly vnder his faire protection .

And thou , ( O Reader ) that art desirous to profit hereby , if thou wilt but truely consider me , when I wrote this Booke , and that common good , to which I had then an eye , thou wilt not conceit , that what hath beene done therein , was haply performed by me for priuate Interest , or vndertaken for ostentation of wit ; for I did neuer so much as pretend it , nor could I finde that sufficient worth in me , to put my selfe vpon my wings in so vaine a flight .

Some perhaps will say , That hauing ( like vnto Watermen ) turn'd my backe and eyes the contrarie way , ( who looke one way , and rowe another ) I direct this little Barke of mine , where I haue most desire to land . But vpon mine honest word , hee is deceiued , that so thinketh . For it was my sole purpose , to guide the prow for the publike good , if I might be worthy to obtaine so great a blessing , and that my labour might serue to so good a vse . Thou shalt finde many things not so cleane wrought , but like Painters first colours , laid on with a carelesse hand and slubberd ouer , which I did omitto polish and flourish ouer for some causes , that gaue hinderance there-vnto . Others are some-what more refined , and better shadowed , which I did willingly auoid to follow , and was loth to finish them to the full , being as fearefull , as carefull of committing some vnaduised errour , or vn-conceiued offence . Others I boldly vnmasked and laid open to discouery , as worthy to be drawne without a vayle , and fit to be presented to publike view . I haue much to say vnto thee , and desire so to d●…e , yet may not tell it thee . I haue written vnto thee , yet haue I left out much of what I would haue written . Reade so , as it becomes thee to reade , and doe not scoffe at my Fable ; and if it shall receiue intertainment at thy hands , accept these lines , which I giue thee , and with them , the minde wherewith they be offered vnto thee . Doe not cast them , as dust and sweepings of the house , vpon the dunghill of obliuion ; consider that there may be some filings and parings of price ; rake them out , gather them into a heape , and when they come to a conuenient quantitie , put them into the crisole of thy consideration ; giue to them the fire of the Spirit ; and I assure thee , thou shalt extract some gold from them , wherewithall to inrich thy selfe . These Arrowes are not all of mine owne Quiuer , nor this honey that I set before thee , all of mine owne hiue ; much of their sweetnesse did I sucke from holy and learned men ; this is merchantable ware , well-conditioned ; and for such I recommend it vnto thee . And because there is no goodthing , which doth not proceed from the hands of God ; nor any thing so bad , whereof some glory doth not result to his diuine Maiestie ( as hauing a part in euery thing ) imbrace , and giue a friendly reception to that which may be profitable for thee , reiecting that which is otherwise , or whatsoeuer else is bad , as meerely mine : Albeit I am very confident , that those things which cannot hurt , are wont many times to doe much good .

In this Discourse , thou maist moralize things , as they shall bee offered vnto thee ; Thou hast a large margent left thee to doe it ; That , which thou shalt find lesse graue , or discomposed , presents it selfe in the person of a Picaro , or Rogue ; which is the Subiect of this Booke . Such things as these ( which are not very many ) sport thy selfe a while with them , iest & play the wagge , and afterwards shake hands with them . For at great Feasts , we must haue meats for all mouthes ; and dishes for all tastes ; Pleasant and sweet wines , which must cheere the heart , and helpe digestion ; and musicke for to please and delight the eares .

Vale , Amice .

A Declaration for the better vnderstanding of this BOOKE .

HAuing written this Poetical History , with purpose to haue it printed in one only Volume , in the discourse whereof those doubts might be cleared , which now ( being diuided ) might offer themselues ; it appeared ( to my seeming ) a very iust thing , to remoue this inconuenience , beeing it might easily be done , and that in very few words . For which purpose , it is to bee pre-supposed , That Guzman de Alfarache , our Picaro , hauing ( by his study ) come to be a good Latinist , Rhetorician , and Grecian ( as we shall deliuer vnto you in this first Part ) after that hee had returned out of Italy into Spaine , he went forward in his Studies , with purpose to professe the state of Religion , and to make himselfe a Church-man . But by reason of his often relapsings to his Vices , he left that course , after he had spent some yeeres therein . Now himselfe writeth his owne life from a-boord the Gallies , where hee remained , and was put to the Oare , for the faults which hee had committed , hauing beene a most famous Thiefe , and notorious Offender , as you shall see more at large in the second Part. Nor is it any improprietie , or beyond our present purpose , if in this first Part I shall set before you some Tracts of Doctrine : But rather seemeth agreeable vnto reason to present vnto you a man of a cleere vnderstanding , holpen by Learning , and punished by Time , making benefit of that idle time , which hee had in the Gallies ; Being that we likewise see many ignorant poore soules sentenced to death , who being to spend the remainder of their time in thinking on their soules health , diuert their thoughts from all other worldly things , for to make a short studied speech when they come to the Ladder .

This Booke diuides it selfe into three parts : In the first , it is treated of Guzman de Alfaraches going forth of his mothers house , and the slender consideration of yong men in those indeuours which they attempt : And how , though their eye-sight be cleere , they will not see , precipitated and blinded with their false pleasures . In the second , the life of a Picaro or Rogue , which hee vnder-went , and the lewd tricks which he was led into by ill company , and the time which he idly mis-spent . In the third , the calamities , and extreme pouertie , whereunto he grew , and the inconsiderate courses which he ran into , because he would not take vp himselfe in time ; and his obstinacie in not suffering himselfe to be ruled by those , who were both able and desirous to doehim good . In that which I shall write hereafter , I shall ( God willing ) giue an end to this Story .

AN ELOGIVM Of ALFONSO de BAROS , Chamberlaine to KING PHILIP the third , in praise of this Booke , and of MATHEO ALEMAN the Author thereof .

IF we owe somewhat to those Painters , who in a Treasurie as it were of Monuments , or some faire Store-house , haue reserued and lapt vp in their linnen clothes ( though vnder lines & dumbe colours ) the pictures of those , who for their Heroicall Actions , merited their Tables ; As also of those , who by their vnworthie carriage gaue motion to their Pensils ; for that with the pleasing portraiture of the one , and the abhorred aspect of the other , they awaken and stirre vp our Spirits , through the ones fame , to imitation ; and through the others infamie , to feare , and aduisement : Much more obligation ( without all comparison ) haue we vnto those , who to their full life represent these things vnto vs in their Histories ; who doe vs more good in what they haue written , and haue this aduantage of the others limming , that their reports and relations doe worke so strongly , and with that perswasiue power vpon our imagination , as if we had really and in truth seene both them and all that they did , with these our bodily eyes .

In these , and all the rest ( if there resteth any obligation that may be greater ) we haue both the lighte and the life , from this our Author : For in this his Historie , which he now hangs foorth ( as Painters doe their pictures ) in the open streete , to the eye of all the world , he hath portraited so to the life , a sonne of idlenes , a loytering Rogue ; that there is not any man ( though neuer so ignorant ) but will knowe him at the first sight , for that he is so like his father : Who as he is the parent of all Uices , so this his childe came to be the Center and Gulfe of them all , suffering them to imbosome themselues within him , receiuing in ( as sinkes doe ) infinite gatherings , not of waters , but of filth and mire . And being now so farre improued in them , that he might serue for an example and patterne vnto those , who should dispose themselues to inioy the like kinde of life , the Authors drift is , that no man should adorne himselfe with such roabes as these : For there is not any one so abhorring himselfe , that at so deare a rate will cloathe himselfe with his Liuerie , seeing that he payd with a shamefull end the punishment of his offences , and the disordinate actions , which his licentious desires did commit . Whose merited and exemplary chastisemen ; : is expressed with Categoricall and strong tearmes , and with an argument ex contrario ; to wit , the reward , & fortunate successes which shall follow him , who liuing vprightly , and spending his time well , shall in his course of life , apply himselfe to a certaine and determined end , and make himselfe the opposite , and Antipodes as it were of the inconstant Figure of this insuing discourse . Wherein , for his admirable order , and good obseruations , bearing in the face of it the resemblance of a Historie , the Author hath happely attained the name and office of an Historian , and a Painter ; as well in those representations , that are to be seene a farre off , as in those shadowes , wherewith he hath disguised his instructions , and those his so necessary rules and aduertisments , appertaining to a politicall life , and to Morall Philosophie , whereunto hee principally aimed ; shewing plainely , that which L●…curgus expressed , by the example of those two Whelps of one litter , whereof the one , through good teaching , and a habit he had gotten , followed the hunting of the Hare , till he had kill'd him ; and the other , because he had not beene so well bred , in stead of falling to hunting , fell a gnawing the bone which he found in the way : Giuing vs to vnderstand by infallible demonstrations , the knowne danger , wherein those children stand , who in their child-hood are trayned vp without obedience and good education by their parents : For without this curbe , they rush into the careere of their youth , vpon the vnbridled Horse of their irrationall and vntamed appetite , which carries them away headlong , and precipitates them into a thousand inconueniences , dashing them-selues as vpon so many Rocks , till there is not one bone left vnbroken , nor one limme left vnrent of their life & goods . He likewise sheweth vnto vs , that that man is no lesse subiect to the like misfortunes , who , being destitute of some noble Science , or some speciall misterie , groundes his hopes vpon the vntilled doctrine of Natures schoole : For without exercising his Talent , or imploying his wit , or without putting him-selfe into some profession , ( hauing experimented that arte , to which he is most inclineable ) he vsurpeth offices quite contrary to his owne inclination , omitting none which hee not imbraceth , attempting to make triall of all , losing in all of them both himselfe , and his time , pretending by his inconstancie and vnsettled disposition , to seeme not to be idle ; that man being not-withstanding more idle ; who puts his Sickle into another mans Corne , and venters vpon a profession that belongs not vnto him , then he that sleepeth and takes his ease , or leades the most retired life . This our Treasurer , Matheo Aleman , hath also well defended himselfe from the like obiections , by those iust occupations of his life , wherein he busied himselfe ; who doth teach vs as well thereby , as by his booke , finding therein the opposite of this his Historie , which he pretendeth to imply : For being bred vp in his tender yeeres in the studie of humane learning , they could not challenge him of keeping * * His learning need not call him to an account , how he had spent his idle howers . A Metaphor taken from Magistrates , of whom their Successours doe take an account of what things haue passed in their ●…ime of residence in the Office . And this is , pedir residencia . residencie in idlenes : Much lesse , that in this his Historie , he hath thrust himselfe into another mans profession : for that it is so properly his owne , and so annexed to his studies , that the desire he had to write it , withdrewe and distracted his thoughts from the honourable intertainment of those his Maiesties papers ; ( being at that time his Contador ) wherein ( albeit he were very sufficient for the exercising of that office ) yet it seemeth that hee was haled thereunto by violence , and against his will ; in that he returned afterwards to his former exercise ; in the continuation whereof , and by his watchfull indeuours , he hath formed this booke for vs , mixing it with that most sweet harmony of delight & profit , which Horace requireth ; inuiting vs with its pleasure , and instructing vs with its grauity , taking for its scope , the publick good , and for its reward , the common benefit . And because young men shall finde in him , the obligation which they haue to their parents , who by a good and lawfull education , haue drawne them out of the darkenes of ignorance , by shewing them that North-Starre , which ought to guide them in this confused Sea of their troublesome life , ( being as long to the idle , as it is short to those that are well occupied ) it shall ( in point of good manners ) be very vnfitting , that the Readers , who are the children of this Bookes Learning , should shewe themselues vnthankefull to their Master , by not throughly esteeming his iust Zeale . And if this shall not saue him from their rigorous censure , the fault must then be in the ineuitable contradiction of the diuersitie of opinions . Nor is it a thing to be wondred at , but rather naturall , and that cannot be auoyded : For most certaine it is , that a man cannot so write , as that hee shall please all : And that whosoeuer should indeuour it , should but goe about to take from Nature her greatest miracle . Nor doe I knowe which is the greater beauty , either that which she placed in that diuersitie , from whence proceed so many diuerse opinions ; or that of the diuers formes of mens faces . For , for the rest , it were but to say , that all the world were but one man , and one taste .

AD GVZMANVM DE ALFARACHE , Vincentij SPINELLI Epigramma . QVis te tanta loqui docuit Guzmanule ? Quis te Spinellus . Stercore submersum , duxit ad astra modò ? Musca modò , et lautas epulas , et putrida tangis Vlcera ; iam trepidas frigore , iamque cales . Iura doces , suprema petis , medicamine curas , Dulcibus et nugis seria mixta doces . Dum carpisque alios , alios virtutibus auges , Consulis ipse omnes , consulis ipse tibi . Iam sacrae Sophiae virides amplecteris vmbras , Transis ad obscoenos sordibus indè iocos . Es modò diuitijs plenus , modò paupere cultu , Tristibus et miseris dulce leuamen ades . Sic speciem humanae vitae , sic praefero solus Guzman . Prospera complectens , aspera cuncta ferens . Hac Aleman variè picta me veste decorat , Me lege desertum , tuque disertus eris .

GVZMAN ▪ DE ALFARACHE vpon his owne life . BOrne without Parents , which in my Cradle Should haue sowne such seeds , as might inable Me to good ; My Youth chose Uico for'ts Father , Whose Step-dame , Fortune , quickly did inslaue her . My Trauels , and my Studies found eft-soone More Formes , and Changes , then are in the Moone . But now my building being ruin'd quite , Like to a Pillar , I onely stand in sight , Others to fore-warne , what course they runne , Lest , like my selfe , they chance to be vndone . With this Story , my life now liu's againe , Which in Obliuions pit did dead remaine . Whose blurrs are now in such faire letters writ , As Time no more shall triumph ouer it . An vn-hewne piece of wood , I long haue beene , Knotty , and rugged , rinded vp in sinne . But polish't now by this neat Worke-mans hand , And , on the Altar set , as a Memoriall stand To lesson others , how their liues to leade , While I to them , mine owne mis-fortunes reade .

Hernando de Soto , to the Author . TWo great things I see In this wise booke contained be : A notable Knaue , And yet the Authors Subiect , graue . In it I discerne , By others harmes , how men may learne Their owne faults t' amend , And shape their course to some good end . Likewise we may know , What Loue to goodnesse we must owe. To teach more , none can ; Nor more be learn'd of any man . 'T is the Common voice , So good on either side 's the choice . Picaro honour gaines , Aleman immortall remaines .

In GVZMANVM d'ALFARACHIA nobilem Erronem et Praedonem publicum , à clariss . reique militaris expertiss . Duce Don Diego Puede-Ser captum , vinculis constrictum , nec sine ouatione in Britannias perductum . ESte procul Elegi : Nihil hîc Dolente dignum , Vocem premant Epica : Non hîc celebratur Heros . Fl●…bili nil opus Lyrâ : Facilis hîc prostat Uenus . Sed nec Tubâ Mantuana : Bella canuntur bellula . Grande nimis reboantes Davum dedecent Cothurni . Nec Iambi turbet furor Hilares Lyaei iocos . Multoque minùs loripes Fugitiuum dic at Scazon . Quale iam dic Metri genus , Nobilis , Guzmane , praedo , Te tuosque mores sonet Expertes Legis , Ordinis ? Nam Marini more Dei , Uitijs nunc irritatus Leo fremis : Nunc remulcens Caudam Canis adularis : Colubrinâ saepe linguâ Immane quiddam sibilas : Saepè Sophi meditantis Pendulâ seuerus togâ Uitae praedicas maeandros . Uafer sic , et fallis Omnes , Et Teipsum multiformis . Vt stupore plenum fuat , Quibus hamis & catenis Illigauit Versipellem , Et hoc Monstrum cicurauit ; Uoce Qui donat Anglicâ ? Aureis catenis nempe , Quibus vinciuntur aures : Nempe Circeo poculo , Tumidos quod sopit angues : Nempe Thracis plectro Lyrae , Quae sequaces reddit vrsas . Hisce comprensus artibus , Retrò manibus revinctis , Curru positus superbo , Per Britanna regna , ( Guzman ) Prodis in pompam publicam . I. F.

To the exact Translator of the famous History of infamous GVZMAN . WHen Guzmans Legend was allow'd in Spaine , And , though a Rogue , found Prince-like intertaine ; He did o're Alpes and Pyrene Hils aduance To tell his Tale in Italy and France : With which their natiue eares being sweetly stung , He theeuish stole their heart , and bound their tongue To speake his praise . At last on Gallick shore ( Standing like Caesar ) thence he did implore Some Pegasus , or winged Argoes ayd , To crosse the Brittaine Seas : Shall they ( he said ) Want onely my thrice-seuen times printed story ? Nor know my Odysse's ? Nor shall my glory Out-goe my feet ? I come no Spy , nor take A Factious part ; No sound of Warre I make , But against sinne ; I land no forraine mates ; For Vertues Schooles should Free be in all states . Straight-wayes thy Gentler spirit ( without thirst Of Fame or Fare ) wafts him a-shore , and first Shewes him the present garbe , the parle , and guise , In a few weekes ; whose Quill both writes and flyes With equall speed : Then shapes him quaint and rare , That he seemes English , nay a Courtiar . Would you know his Discourse ? He biting laughes , A Comicke Satyre , at small faults hescoffes , But stabbes th' impudent : Now in amorous straine He sighes a Louer ; Now in busie gaine He acts a Merchant ; Then in learned weedes He lookes a Student : Ibis-like he feedes On publike venome , and deserues a Shrine ( Sooner then he that stiled was Diuine ) For purging humours . Now his wishes are Outstript by fauour ; Then in Gallies bare He honours beggery : His whole Theame is Man , On which nor Crantor nor Chrysippus can More wisely comment ; for his life alone , Is Precept with Example ; So that none Can better teach by worse meanes ; who by strange Bifronted posture , Ill , to good , doth change . So Vipers flesh , the Vipers cure hath bin : And sinfull surfets , Antidotes for sin . So an old Bawdes face , Chastnesse doth suggest : Vices true Picture , makes vs Vice detest , More then Graue Platoes wish ; For vertues sight Can lesse allure , then villany affright . Deare Country , then harbour a weary wight , Be thou a Delos , to this errant Knight : Giue the kind Parabien , and gracious eye To various mirth : And ( Reader ) if thou spy Thy owne selfe in this Magick glasse , Refuse No Surgeons hand , but ( 'gainst the common vse ) Let the Booke censure thee ; And thanke his paine , Whose Pen , so gently prickt thy maister-vaine : And thanke his faithfull Conuoy ; It may be , Who scornes base fawning ; Loue may gratifie . More is but Due : for as my Scale designes ; This is the Base , to large and worthy Lines . Yours I. F.

To Don Diego Puede-Ser , and his Translation of GVZMAN . AS , few , French Rablais vnderstand ; and none Dare in our Vulgar Tongue once make him knowne , No more ; our Plodding Linguists could attaine ( By turning Minshewe ) to this Rogue of Spaine , So crabbed Canting was his Authors Pen And phrase , eu'n darke to his owne Country-men ; Till , thankes and praise to this Translators paine , His Margent , now makes him speake English plaine . Leo : Diggs .

On the Author , Worke , and Translator . WHo tracks this Authors , or Translators Pen , Shall finde , that either hath read Bookes , and Men : To say but one , were single . Then it chimes , When the old words doe strike on the new times , As in this Spanish Proteus ; who , though writ But in one tongue , was form'd with the worlds wit : And hath the noblest marke of a good Booke , That an ill man dares not securely looke Vpon it , but will loath , or let it passe , As a deformed face doth a true glasse . Such Bookes deserue Translators , of like coate As was the Genius where with they were wrote ; And this hath met that one , that may be stil'd More then the Foster-father of this Child ; For though Spaine gaue him his first ayre and Vogue , He would be call'd , henceforth , the English-Rogue , But that hee 's too well suted , in a cloth , Finer then was his Spanish , if my Oath Will bee receiu'd in Court ; If not , would I Had cloath'd him so . Here 's all I can supply To your desert , who'haue done it , Friend . And this Faire Aemulation , and no Enuy is ; When you behold me wish my selfe , the man That would haue done , that , which you onely can . Ben : Ionson .

THE PRINTER TO THE Discreet and Curious READER .

AFter so much as you haue read heere , vttered in their iust Commendation , let it be my minute , to be heard in a line or two for my selfe : which is , that you would be pleased not to lay my faults on them . I will neither pretend badnesse of Copy , or his absence , whose prouince it was to correct it ; but pray the amendment of these few escapes ( as you finde them here-vnder noted , ) before you begin to reade : with hope of your pardon , the rather , because it hath beene my care they should be no more .

Ed: Blount .

Page . Line . Fault . Correct . 9. 20. the they then they 11. 23. Labuador Labrador 22. 18. she could he could 36. 43. tumbled tumbling 56. 24. time Ayre 61. 40. action actions 83. 13. in clearing indearing 87. 17. those that , and those that ibid. 22. wherevpon , whereunto 92. 15. Zerezano Xerezano 103. marg. pein pan 109. 55. to be much to be so much 110. 4. many money 114. 16. top toy 122. marg. Cartas Cantos 123. 28. inconheuience inconuenience 156 17. wish to sell wish you to sell ibid. 28. he told he told me 163. 47. to former to my former 168. 45. to is ▪ is to 180. 35. for fifty twenty 187. 35 the thee 208 43 vico vico 228. 22. much to to much 236 48 to haue haue to 239 41 Aprouechom aproucchan 262 6 indisposition in disposition

A Table of the Chapters and matter contained in the three Bookes of the first Part. CHAP. I. GVzman de Alfarache recounteth who was his Father , and thereupon takes occasion learnedly to discourse of Detractors , and euill speakers , of vnconscionable Merchants , of Iudges , of bad Clerkes , of Lites , and Litigants , and that too much neatnesse in cloathes , and nice dressing , is ill in a Woman , and worse in a Man . CHAP. II. Guzman de Alfarache goes on , in recounting who were his Parents , and declareth withall who his Mother was ; and for our better instruction , describes the euill conditions and bad qualities of a lewd woman , of Bawdes ; of a sensuall and lasciuious man , & that the end of dishonest Loue , is the wasting of a mans honour , of his wealth , and of himselfe . CHAP. III. How Guzman departed from his Mothers house vpon a Friday towards the Euening , discouering by the way the torments of hunger , and that which befell him with his Hostesse , recounting many not able examples of some Rules of ill Gouernment . CHAP. IV. Guzman de Alfarache recounteth to a Carrier what had betided him with his Hostesse : And discourseth of laughing . After that , he tels two short Tales ; one , of a couetous Physician ; the other of two yong men , how they vs'd the said Hostesse : And vpon the neck of that , fals into a learned discourse , touching the pardoning of iniuries . CHAP. V. How Guzman and the Carrier did eate of a yong Mule , thinking it had beene Ueale , being coozened by his Host in Cantillana , and discourseth by the way of the coozening tricks , which bad Hosts put vpon poore Trauellers . CHAP. VI. Guzman goes on , in recounting what succeeded with his Host of Cantillana , who had giuen him to eate of his yong Mule , and of the misfortunes that befell the said Guzman : And how it is not good vpon the way to quarrell with our Host. CHAP. VII . Mans misfortune is here discoursed of , and to that purpose you haue a story told you of the gods of those ancienter times : And how Guzman , being thought to be a Thiefe , was apprehended ; but afterwards being knowne what he was , hee was set at liberty . One of the Clergy-men promiseth to tell vs a story , to entertaine the time withall , vpon the way .

CHAP. VIII . Wherein Guzman de Alfarache relateth the Story of those two Louers , Ozmin and Daraxa .

THE ARGVMENT .

How Ferdinand and Isabell , King and Queene of Spaine , tooke Baca , a Citie of the Moores , wherein Daraxa a beautifull and noble Damozel was taken Prisoner , whom Queene Isabell brought with her to Seuill , and there left her in the custodie of Don Luys de Padilla . And how Ozmin a yong Gentleman well descended , and inamoured of that Lady , after hee had suffered long sicknesse for the imprisonment of his faire Daraxa , went to the said Citie ; together with the diuers accidents that happened to them both .

A Table of the Chapters and matter contained in the second BOOKE . CHAP. I. HOw Guzman de Alfarache , going out of Caçalla towards Madrid , proues the quality and condition of a miserable man , and vpon this occasion , grauely discourseth of the effects of Want , of Shame , and of Castles in the ayre : And how he came to serue an Host ; and of the wicked disposition of such kinde of men . CHAP. II. How Guzman de Alfarache leauing his Host , went begging to Madrid ; and comming thither , how he set himselfe to learne to play the Rogue , & to beare a Basket ; where , by the way he discourseth of Hunger , of Beggery , & of Honour which hurteth the soule . CHAP. III. Guzman de Alfarache goes on in his Discourse against vaine Honours : where , by the way he offers vnto Mans consideration , what manner of person he ought to be , how to beare himselfe in his Office , and to gouerne himselfe in those high places , wherevnto he is called . CHAP. IV. Guzman de Alfarache deliuereth a learned and witty discourse , conceiued by himselfe , against the Uanity of Honour : touching by the way vpon the Uices of Seru●…nts ▪ of Shop-keepers , of Notaries , of Proctors , of Iudges , of Artificers , of Apothecaries , of Physicians , and of Lawyers . CHAP. V. How Guzman de Alfarache lighted on a Cookes seruice , and with faire Sentences , and good Lessons , sheweth , what he should be that serueth . He blameth gaming , & Gamesters . He declareth a pretty theft performed by him ; he relateth the Vices of Despensero's , Cookes , Butlers , and other the like Officers . Of Lords , abused by their seruants . Of Kings , and their miserable condition . Of the vanity of Inferiours , contesting with their Superiours . He condemneth those Masters , that ill intreate their seruants : And how they ought to carry themselues towards them . CHAP. VI. Guzman de Alfarache prosecutes that which past betwixt him and his Master , till being dismist , he departed from him : And takes occasion here-vpon , to condemne Idlenesse and euill Company , and those inueterated vices in rich men . Hee recounteth the spoyles , and Trophees of Cookes ; and tels a merry Story , that past between himselfe , and the Cookes wife , his Mistresse . CHAP. VII . How Guzman de Alfarache being put from the Cooke his Master , turnes Picaro , and proues a notable cunning Rogue . How he hauing a great desire to see Italy , occasion was offered vnto him to effect his purpose , by the helpe of a theft done vpon a Grocer , and how he went sheere away with it , and left Madrid . CHAP. VIII . How Guzman de Alfarache , cloathing himselfe like a Gallant in Toledo , makes loue to certain Gentlewomen : He telleth how things past with them , & how there , and in Malagon they scorned him ; He discourseth of youthfull iollity , and of the craft & subtilty of your Spanish women ; which may serue for an Instruction , & warning to all yong men . CHAP. IX . How Guzman de Alfarache lists himselfe for a Souldier . He telleth , whence that ill phrase grew : En Malagon , en cada casa vn ladron ; y en lo del Alcalde , hi●…oy padre : In Malagon , euery house a Thiefe ; and in that of the Alcalde two : The father and the sonne . How in a short time , through ill gouernment , all Guzmans money is gone ; How to his griefe he is forced to serue a Captaine . Some lessons are giuen to young men . To these are added the faults of bad Ministers in matters of war-fare . CHAP. X. Guzman de Alfarache declareth the mis-fortunes , and the wants of one that is decayed in his fortunes : And how he followed a Captaine , till he came into Italy ; Exercising himselfe in all kinde of thefts great and small , for the reliefe and helpe of his Master .

A Table of the Chapters and matter contained in the third BOOKE . CHAP. I. GVzman discourseth of pouertie , and of the wrongs and outrages , which a poore man indureth ; As also of Riches , and of the honours that are done vnto the Rich: As likewise of the naughtinesse of this present world : And how , not finding his Kindred , which he sought for in Genoa , he went to Rome ; and of a i●…st that was put vpon him , before he left that Citie . CHAP. II. Guzman discourseth of the vnhappinesse , greatnesse , & commendation of Necessitie and Want ; And how after he was gone from Genoa , he fel a begging . And how , keeping company with other poore beggers , he was instructed by them , of their Statutes , & Lawes . CHAP. III. How Guzman de Alfarache was not only reprehended by a learned Rogue , & Doctor in his facultie ; but likewise how he learned of him some new Orders and Capitulations , concerning this his roguish kinde of life , and that which hapned vnto him in this his vpright course ; And of many Precepts and Lessons , deliuered vnto him vpon this point by a Cordouese , an old cunning Crosse-biter . CHAP. IV. Guzman de Alfarache discourseth of the Charitie that wee are to vse towards our neighbour ; He recounteth what befell him with a Gentleman : And of the free life , and great libertie which a Begger inioyes . CHAP. V. Guzman de Alfarache discourseth of the qualitie of mens Consciences , and recounteth what hapned in his time to a notable Rogue , and famous begger in Florence , who at his death made the great Duke his heire . He treats of the ambitious man ; And deliuers in the end , how he was thrust out of Gaeta for his counterfetting . CHAP. VI. Guzman de Alfarache discourseth of Almes : And being returned to Rome , hee fals afresh to his old Trade of begging . Hee feignes himselfe to haue a sore legge . A Cardinall taking compassion of him , takes order , to haue him cured in his own house , and to be laid in his owne bed . He discouers the knauery of Surgeons , hauing a bad conscience : And how being cured , he becomes the Cardinals Page . CHAP. VII . Guzman de Alfarache discourseth , how all things haue had their time of Empire . He deliuereth strange things , touching Truth and Lying . As beeing Page to the Cardinall ; he declareth the Uertues , and the Vices , wherein your Pages exercise themselues . He relateth a pleasant Story of his stealing of some Conserues , and how hee was punished for it . CHAP. VIII . Guzman de Alfarache reuenges a tricke which the Secretarie had put vpon the Chamberlaine , whom he then attended . He tels a tale of Shame and feare ; What it is , and how painted forth . He is receiued againe into the Cardinals seruice . And how finely he coozened him of a Barrell of Conserues . CHAP. IX . Guzman de Alfarache treats of Charitie : Discourseth of Masters , kind , and vnkinde : Telleth of another theft of Conserues . His exercises , and distastes being a Page . He recounteth the tricks he vsed at Primera . That it is good to know play ; but better not to vse any gaming at all . And how for playing hee was put out of the Cardinals seruice . And how proud ignorance is the cause of all euill . CHAP X. Guzman de Alfarache discourseth of ill company ; of Hospitality ; of Patience ; and how being put out of the Cardinals house , he placed himselfe with the Embassador of France , where he plaid some Knauish prankes . He relates a Story , which he heard from a Gentleman of Naples . And ending with that , he giues an end to the first part of his life .

THE ROGVE : OR , THE FIRST PART OF THE LIFE OF GVZMAN DE ALFARACHE . The first Booke .

CHAPTER I.

Guzman de Alfarache recounteth who was his Father , and thereupon takes occasion learnedly to discourse of Detractors , and euill speakers , of vnconscionable Merchants , of Iudges , of bad Clerkes , of Lites , and Litigants , and that too much neatnes in cloaths , and nice dressing , is ill in a Woman , & worse in a Man .

CVrious Reader , The desire which I had to recount my life vnto thee , made me make great haste to ingulfe my selfe therein , without first preparing some things fit to be related , which ( seruing as an induction and entrance to the matter ) had beene very needfull for the better informing of thy vnderstanding : ( for beeing essentiall to this Discourse ) they would likewise haue giuen thee no small content . But through too much haste , I forgat to shut the doore after mee , and so vnawares haue left a way of entrance open , for euery wrangling Sophister , and smatterer in Logicke , to taxe me ofignorance , and to lay it as a fault to my charge , that I did not proceed à definitione ad definitum , from the definition to the thing defined . And that before I tooke vpon me to make Relation thereof , I had not first told thee , who , and what were my Parents , together with their obscure and confused birth : which so much for so much , or as farre as concerneth them in their particular , according to their modell , and proportion in their kind and degree , would without doubt ( had I but vndertaken to describe it vnto you ) beene farre more pleasing , and more acceptable vnto you , then this mine owne life . I will rather preferre that , which is of most importance , leauing that which is not lawfull for me , to others to vndergoe that taske , and to play out that tricke at Cards for me . And albeit it becommeth no man , to participate of that propertie of the Hyena , to make a liuing by ripping vp the liues of the dead , as shee doth maintaine her selfe The Hyena and her qualities . by feeding on those carkases which she teares out of graues ; I assure my selfe , considering the Censurers that are now adayes to bee found in the world , they will not want those that will write their Chronicle . Nor is it a thing to be wondred at , since that this slight shadowing of my Fathers life , seemeth to inferre , that I pare them too neere the quicke , or at least , that there went but one paire of sheeres , betweene their liues , and mine . And I doubt not , but thou wilt out with thy purse , and giue mee a thousand rash Attributes ; the least whereof shall be either Foole , or Blockhead , or Coxcombe , or the like . For if I cannot conceale mine owne faults , you will say , I will make no bones to bewray others . Thy reason is good , and I allow of it , but I would haue thee withall to consider , That albeit thou wilt count mee but a lewd a a It is worse to be bad , then to be thought so . Companion , yet I would not willingly seeme so to be , though it bee farre worse to be so , and to make boast of wickednesse . And that by contradicting so iust a Precept , as is that fifth Commandement , touching the honour and reuerence which I owe them , I should goe about to couer mine owne weakenesses , by laying open those of my Ancestors . For , it is the birth of vile and base b b What minde is that , which is base thoughts , to seeke to grace themselues by disgracing others , which is now an ordinary practice , which I condemne for that solemn c c In your great solemne feasts in Spaine , they vse to haue seuen , & in some places eight Prebends with Scepters of siluer in their hands , and Copes of cloth of gold on their backs , when they assist at diuine seruice , and singing of Anthemes . From which metaphor this phrase is borrowed . foolery of sixe Priests Copes , or double-Feasts ; that is to say , for anotorious , and high point of folly . And a greater there cannot be , because therein I discouer my bend , and shew which way the dint of my edge lyeth . And my errour is not salued , by wounding the good name of my neighbour , or by traducing my Parent . Besides , the Detractor neuer heareth well , but is euill spoken of by all men . But to me , it doth not succeed so ; for in the setting forth and adorning of this History , ( it being necessary that my selfe must needs doe it ) no man but will say , Gods blessing be with him , that so truely resembles his Parents , casting vpon me these their good wishes by the way . Againe , his life was so well knowne , and all that he did , so manifest to all the world , that to pretend the denying of it , were meere folly , and an open d d Arresto , is a French word : but because it is Spaniolized , I say , Arresto , is as much as a Decree , or Sentence confirmed in the Supreme Counsell , from which there is no Appeale . So sayes Casaneus in his Catol . gloriae Mundi . Arrestum firmum , & fixum , à quo nemo prouocare possit . And it is a meere Greeke Word 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 , placitum , gratum , aequum . That it is pronounced with a double rr : the reason is , for that the French is a Virile tongue . Resto consignado , is the set rest agreed vpon at Primero , which they may not passe . But jugar à resto abierto , vale , sin tassa , without limitation ; when a man may set what he will : The Reader may take which sense be best liketh . Arrest , and free liberty giuen for the occasioning of new matter of murmuration to be brought against him . And therefore I am perswaded , that I doe them ( if I may vse that phrase of speech ) a notorious courtesie , in expressing the pure , and true naked Text , wherewith I will giue the lye to those glosses , which haue beene made thereupon . For as often as any one mentioneth any thing of him , or recounts ought of his , he addes thereunto , and multiplyes it with the Cyphers , which are set to his owne Spectacles , or as it pleaseth him ; sometimes making more , but neuer lesse , as the vaine comes vpon him , and as the toy for the present takes him in the head . For there is a certaine kinde of men , that when matter is offered suting to their purpose , for to make their tale square , and to hang well together , will lessen a Pyramis of Egypt , and make of a Gnat an Elephant , gather euidence from surmises ; sight from hearing ; and knowledge from opinion , onely for to flourish their eloquence , and to credit their discretion . Thus it vsually falleth out , and this was to bee seene in a Gentleman a Stranger , whom my selfe knew in Madrid : Who beeing much affectioned to Spanish Horses , and desirous to carry home with him to his owne Country a true and faithfull Counterfeit , as wel for his own entertainment and delight , as that he might shew the same to his friends . And for that he was of a Nation farre remote , and it being neither permitted , nor possible for him , to carrie them home aliue , hauing in his owne stable two of the fairest of stature , and feature , that were to be found in all the Court : he intreated two famous Painters , that each of them would draw one , as they should agree vpon their choise ; promising ( besides their due ) a certain reward to him that should surpasse the other in workemanship . The one painted a py'd Horse , with that perfection , that hee onely failed in that , which was impossible for him to doe , to wit , in giuing him life , and soule . For , in the rest ( deceiuing the sight , because it did little , or nothing at all differ from the naturall ) it would on the sudden haue blinded any carelesse eye , and at the first blush amazed his vnderstanding , for that there was no difference betweene a liuing Horse and it . With this onely did he fill and finish his Table , giuing in the rest Lights and shadowes , as might sute best with each seuerall part .

The other drew a Dapple-gray ( that heauen-resembling colour ) and though his worke were very good , yet it came very short of that before deliuered ; yet in one thing , he went much beyond him , wherein he shew'd himselfe his crafts-master . And it was this : when he had painted his Horse , in those other parts of the Table , where he found blankes , or void places , in those that were vppermost , hee drew admirable Land-skips , and other representations of things afarre off , as clouds in the ayre ; streakes in the sky , and other fiery colours of the heauens , occasioned by the reflexe of the Sun-setting beames , ruinated buildings , and other diuersities of rare Architecture . And in the lower part , neerest to the ground ; he had graced his worke with many fine Groues , dainty Flowers , greene Meddowes , and craggy Rocks . And on the one side of the Table , that made fittest for that purpose , hee had fastned all the furniture , belonging to his Horse , to the body of a Tree , at the foote whereof stood a Saddle , Gennet-fashion , so costly , and so curiously wrought , and with that excellency of Art , as it cannot be in-deered too much , or expressed to that life it deserueth .

When this Gentleman saw his Tables , and liking them wonderfull well ( as he had reason so to doe ) he first paid him , with whom he had first agreed , and not sticking vpon that which he demanded for it , giuing in reward to that ingenious Painter a rich ring from off his finger , he sent him away well satisfied , hauing paid him ouer & aboue the price for which they bargained .

Now the other grew so fondly conceited , & so foolishly in loue with his own worke , and was so vainely transported with hope of a liberall and franke paiment , that he required such an excessiue price , as was beyond all reason .

The Gentleman , being strooken blanke , and put to a non-plus , that hee should aske him so much , and that he had scarce wherewithall to pay him , said vnto him ; Tell me ( my friend ) why shouldest thou aske me so much ; or why doest thou not consider with thy selfe what this other piece cost me , wherevnto thine cannot be compared ; nor comes nothing neere it ? For the Horse ( indeede Sir , answered the Painter ) your Worship speakes reason . But the very trees , and ruines , that are in mine , are worth as much as all the others worke . To whom the Gentleman replide ; It is neither fitting , nor necessary for me to carry home with me such a volume of trees ; such a bulke of ill combined buildings ; and such a deale of lumber and luggage as is heere , when we haue many faire and goodly houses in our owne Country . Besides , I haue not that affection to these toyes , as I haue vnto Horses . And that which I cannot otherwise enioy but by picture , that alone I desire to carry along with me .

The Painter againe made answere ; In so great and large a piece ; a sole single Horse will not shew so well . And if for nothing else , yet at least for the delight of the Eye , and the gracing of the Square , it not only importeth a Painter , but euen enforceth him sometimes to compose a Picture of other different things , besides the Master piece , that may qualifie it the better , and giue it the more delicate lustre . So that , this seeming fairer to the sight , and presenting it selfe with that pleasure as it doth , you will grant me this , I hope ; That it is very fit , that a horse should haue his bridle , and his saddle , together with his trappings , and all other things belonging to a perfect and complete furniture ; especially being so curiously wrought , with so cleane a hand , and such exquisite Art , that if you would giue me other such as these , though they were all of Gold , I would not take them in exchange for those that you see heere drawne . The Gentleman hauing now found a string whereupon to play , and caught hold of that , which he most desired , which was the Picture , that he had already paid for ( the other esteeming impertinent , though in it's kinde very good , and much to be commended ) and not finding himselfe so ouer-stored with money , as to part with so much as hee required , discreetly said vnto him ; I onely bargain'd with you for the Horse , and ( for that the worke is good , and well wrought ) I will ( if you be pleased to sell it mee ) pay you accordingly . As for the furniture , you may keepe it to your selfe , or bestow it vpon those , that haue a minde to it , for I haue no need of it . The Painter went away discontented , and vnpaid , by reason of the excessiue rates hee He that does that which he ought not , that haps to him , which hee thinkes not . had set vpon his Picture ; and for that out of his owne choise , he had wilfully ouerlashed his discretion , thinking with himselfe , that because his Worke was more , he should be the more rewarded .

It hath been ( and still is ) a common and generall custome amongst men , The effects of Detractors . when you intreat them to recite what they know in this , or that other thing ; or to report what they haue heard , or seene ; or to tell you the truth and substance of a businesse , to prepare colours to slicke it ouer , and to paint and disguize it , that you can no more know the face of it , then the countenance of an old Hagge , that is plaisterd ouer with painting . Euery one giues his shadowings after his owne fancie : one while amplifying ; another while mouing passion ; sometimes disannulling , and sometimes diuerting , as the humour takes him . Now he stretcheth it with his teeth , that he may make the Leather retch : By and by againe , he fileth and polisheth it , till he haue made it fit for his purpose , that he may cut and graue therein what he list ; putting it an Ace , or a Sice higher , if it please him so to do . Making , like another Count * * The Count Palatines , anciently in Rome , had power and priuiledge to legitimate Bastards , to giue degrees , and Titles of honour in learning , or otherwise . Vide Couarru●…ias in Vocabulo Palatino . Palatine , a Foole , a Wise man ; a filthy-fac'd fellow , a beautifull person ; and a Cowardly Villaine , a valiant Hercules . They set the Caract and worth vpon things , as they please to value them ; not remembring , that they may paint a Horse well inough , though they leaue him bare-ridged , and without his furniture ; and report a thing true inough to the life , without commenting vpon it . Iust so hath it fared with my father , of whom to speake the truth , things are so falsified , that nothing is now said of him , which was so indeed . They haue ( with Celestine ) of tres made treze , of three , thirteene ; and of thirteene , three hundred . For euery one thinkes it fit to adde somewhat : so that Mole-hils are growne to be Mountaines , and such a confused Chaos , and rapsodie of things huddled one on the necke of another , that there is no bottome of them , nor can there any ground for them be found : euery one incouraging himselfe by the additions of others , ( one growing still vpon another . ) And that wrong which euery particular person in himselfe was not able to doe , by a generall helping hand , and common consent of all men , is become more grieuous . There are some deceitfull and false tongues , which , like sharpe-headed Artowes , and hot burning Coales , haue gone about to wound the honour , and consume to ashes the good name of my Parents ; whence both to them , and my selfe , diuers notable affrents doe dayly redound . It is to bee imagined , and you may very well beleeue mee , that if it lay in our hands , to make our owne choise ( but beggers must be no choosers ) out of that masse of Adam , and first lumpe of flesh , I would haue scrambled hard for one of the best morsels , though I had been forced to goe to Cuffes for it : But there is no helpe for that ; Euery man must bee content with that which fals to his lot : we may not be our owne Caruers . But since he that hath shared these things amongst vs , keepes them in his owne hands , and knowes when and where to bestow them , and what is fittest for euery man , let vs praise his holy Name . For though I had ( God be thanked for it ) my a a Allud●…ng to Iacobs halting . haltings , though I had naturall defects , though I were not without my spots and blemishes , yet was I so fauoured by Fortune , that I was nobly borne ; and that they lighted vpon a man innobled in his blood , both by father and mother . La sangue se hereda , y el vicio se apega , Blood is by inheritance , but Vice is aduentitious , yet cleaueth closer then the other , when it once takes hold of vs . He that shall be , what he ought to be , shall be accordingly rewarded , but shall not purge away the faults of his Parents .

First of all then , I shall giue you to vnderstand , That my father , and his Kindred , were a certaine kind of vpstart Gentlemen , that came out of the Guzmans father . a a Levantisco , which is the word in the Originall , is taken for an Vpstart , a Iew , or an Easterling , come - from the Levant And , Estar de Levante , is one , that hath no set dwelling . Covarruvias , vocab . Levante . Against Vsurers , and Exchangers of Moneys . Leuant , who hauing no certaine abiding , came at length to reside , and settle in Genoa ; where they were ingrafted into the Nobilitie , and had many large and goodly Priuiledges granted vnto them . And although they were not Naturals of that place , yet we shall here put them vnder that stile , as if they had beene borne there . His Trafficke and income , whereby he maintained himselfe , was according to the common custome of that Country ; the which , for our sinnes sake , is growne now into ours ; which infection of late , hath spred it selfe thorow the world , to wit , Vsury , Money-bankes , and profitable Exchange of gold and siluer . Euen for this , was he persecuted and reuiled , defaming him with that foule name of Vsurer . Many times hee himselfe heard that reprochfull word as hee past along the streets , it could not escape his eare , yet he was of that good nature , and gentle condition , that hee tooke no notice of it , but slightly past it ouer . For which , they had no reason so to do , since that Vse-money ( the more the pittie ) hath beene , and is still permitted thorowout the world . I will not commend it , and ( God forbid ) that I should defend it to belawfull ( which some do allow ) to take money for money , vpon pawnes of gold or siluer for some limited time , or to take ( the day being broken ) the b b The Spanish word , is Rematado . Now Remato , or Trance . is the last bidding for a thing at a Port sale , which when we are come vnto , transit res à venditore , ad emptorem . Forfeiture thereof , nor other close trickes and conueyances : nor that which they call by the name of c c Cambio seco , is a mystery among Merchants , to assigne ouer Bils of Exchange from Antwerpe to Bezonzon in Lorrain , where there is no Fayre or trade of Merchandize : but Bils are thence remitted to Genoa , onely to gaine time , and day of payment . Guzmans fathers deuotion . Cambio seco , a dry kind of Exchange . Nor that money should runne from Faire to Faire , where there was neuer any intercourse of men , or trading : for those doe but beare about them the voice of Iacob , and the hands of Esau ; kind shewes , and rough deeds . And at the shooting of Ionathans flight , or some warning-piece or other that is giuen , the deceit is discouered . But such things as these , ( though they laid them to his charge ) I my selfe saw them not , and therefore cannot giue you any inckling of them .

But that which is absolutely vnderstood to be Cambio , an Exchange or turning and winding of moneys , is a thing indifferent , which may ( as it is vsed ) be either good or ill . And for such ( though perhaps vniustly ) I doe not wonder , that ( being it ought to be esteemed ill ) it is not reproued . But that which is euidently good , being without any shadow of euill , that men should murmure at this , and speake against it ; this is that , which doth astonish me , and strikes me into a strange amazement . To say , when I see a religious person enter at midnight thorow a window , into a suspected place , with his sword in his hand , and his buckler at his girdle , that he is going to minister the Sacrament , were a meere madnesse : for neither God will haue it so , nor doth his Church permit , that I should be such an errant Asse , as to thinke that to be good , which is euidently euill . When a man shall pray , frequent vertuous exercises , heare diuine Seruice , confesse his sinnes , and often communicate ; for men to say , that such a one is an Hypocrite , I can by no meanes indure it : and as there is nothing more scandalous to a good Christian , so is there not any wickednesse like vnto it .

My father had a faire large Masse-booke with the full number of Dauids 150. Psalmes , wherein he had beene taught to pray , ( I meane in the Spanish tongue ) and a great paire of Beades , whereof euery one of them was as bigge as an hazell nut . These my mother gaue him , which came to his hands when she died . These he alwaies carried about him , you should neuer see them out of his hand , euery morning he heard his Masse , humbly kneeling with both his knees on the ground , his hands ioyning themselues together at his brest , lifting them vp towards heauen , on the toppe whereof his Hat hung . Some malicious people ( by way of reproch ) did not sticke to say , that he did pray in this manner , because he would not heare the Priest , and that he held his Hat so high , because he would not see him . But of this , let them iudge , who find themselues free from passion , and let them tell me , whether it be not a peruerse and rash censure , proceeding from a prophane kinde of people , that haue no care of their soules , and without any conscience at all . But the very truth is , that the maine cause , and first beginning of their murmuring against him , was ; that a Partner of his in Seuill , being broken , and turn'd Bankrupt , and hauing carried away with him great summes of moneys that were his , he pursued after him , as well to remedy himselfe as well as he could of so great a losse , as also to order and settle some other necessary businesses , which did much concerne him .

The ship he went in was set vpon and taken ; and hee , together with the Guzmans father taken prisoner . rest that were in her , taken captiues , and carried to Argiers : where , what out of feare , and what out of despaire ; feare , for that hee knew not how or which way to recouer his liberty ; and despaire , for that hee neuer looked to get againe his moneys ; for quietnesse sake , as one that had not the spirit of contradiction , or that was wont to gainesay any thing , he renounced his Religion , and turned Turke . There he married a Moore , a woman of perfect beauty , and principall ranke , with whom he had good store of wealth . For He turnes Turke . He marries a Moore . in matter of interest , ( taking it in the generall , in which tracke I still treade , without preiudice to a great number of noble persons , and graue and principall Gentlemen ; for there are of all sorts in all places ) I will onely speake by the way , what I my selfe knew of some of my fathers kindred , during the time , that I traded and conuersed with them . They were very solicitous in Guzmans kindred , what condition they were of . meddling with other mens houses , and too forgetfull and carelesse of their owne : desirous , that other men should deale plainly and truly with them , whilest from themselues , you should not get so much as one true word . Willing , that others should pay them all that they ought , but of what they ought , to pay nothing at all : to gaine and spend freely , ( light where it would light for them , they cared not who did wring for it ) for the pawne was already forfeited , their day was past ; and ( as the Prouerbe is ) à Roma por todo , at Rome there is an absolution for all offences . It afterwards so fell out , that my fathers Partner , to secure himselfe from after-claps , and to liue out of danger , laboured to take order with his Creditors , and to compound for his debts , vpon faire and reasonable conditions , requiring such rates and dayes of payment , as that he might both be able to liue well himselfe , as also to pay his debts .

When this came to my fathers eare , that had certaine and assured notice of Guzmans father flies from Argiers . And in what manner . it , he had a great desire to come away with all the secrecie and diligence he could possibly deuise . And the better to deceiue the Moore his wife , hee told her , that he purposed to employ himselfe in matters of Merchandize , which would turne much to their profit . He made money of most that he had , and putting it into Chekines , ( a certaine coyne , that is made of fine Barbary gold ) taking with him all the Iewels he could finger , and so leauing her alone , and very poore , he came his way with all the speed he could . And not making any one acquainted therewith , neither friend nor foe , reducing himselfe to the Faith of Iesus Christ , repenting himselfe of his fault , with teares in his eyes , being his owne Promoter , he accused himselfe , crauing pardon for his offence , and that some fauourable penance might bee inflicted vpon him . Which being inioyned him , and fully performed by him , he afterwards went about to recouer his debts . And this was the chiefe cause , why they would neuer afterwards trust him , nor haue any charitable opinion of him , were his workes neuer so good , neuer so pious . And if you aske other reason , you were as good hold your tongue , you shall get none other from them , but impertinencies , and answers nothing to the purpose , such as they haue often made me ; Once a knaue , and euer a knaue : Nam qui semel est , semper praesumitur Once a Knaue , & euer a Knaue . esse malus : For he that hath once beene naught , is presumed to bee so still ; and that he will neuer get out of the way of wickednes , that hath once made it his common walke . Not considering , that no man knowes , how God toucheth a mans heart , and cals him home vnto him , putting him againe in the right path , and whether ( agreeable to that authenticke Law ) hee had reformed his manners or no.

Here you see , without leaning this or that way , or without any the least inclining to any side , my fathers Mere-stones ; the very limits , and bounds , that do define and determine him ; On the one side , stand ( as supporters ) his couzening Kindred , and bankrupt Copartner ; on the other side , his owne coozening of the Moore . And if it be obiected , that he himselfe brake twice or thrice , hauing other mens goods in his hands ; if they likewise brake with him , it is no wonder , that he should not hold . For men are not made of steele , nor are they bound to hold like nayles : for they , euen though of yron , doe sometimes faile and burst in sunder , and grow weake and loose . These are your Merchants stratagems , their fine shifts of wit , which ( vpon occasion ) The cunning trickes of certaine Merchants in their Trading . they practise when and where they please ; especially in Spaine , where they haue found the tricke of getting . Nor is it a thing so much to be wondred at ; there lies their skill , let it thriue as it will : we leaue that to themselues , and their Confessors , to whom , I doubt not , but they giue a large account of their doings . Onely God is the Iudge of these things ; and let him that absolues them , looke what he does : I see many , that make a common practice of it , but not a man of them , that hangs for it . If it were a delict , an euill thing , or a theft , it is a cleare case that it should be punished , since for lesse then sixe Royals , we see an hundred poore soules whipt about the towne , and sent to the Gallies .

That I might not vent my selfe in my fathers preiudice , I could be content to hold my peace , and to silence what I thinke : but if I will follow the Philosophers counsell , I must then say , Amicus Plato , sed magis amicus Ueritas : Plato is my friend , but the Truth more . I loue my father well , but I must preserue the truth aboue all things . Conforming my selfe therefore to that Philosophicall saying , let the world hold me excused , if I canonize this Case for one of the greatest villanies and rogueries , that was euer put in vse , and such as deserueth exemplarie punishment , and that in no meane degree . But perhaps some one Merchant or other , that is his crafts-master in this kind of trade , will tell me to my face , Hold your hand , Sir , you are a little too forward , in what Consistory ( I pray ) of the Pope and his Cardinals , hath Bankrupture beene determined , and condemned for a sinne ? Who will put an Ideot , a Galley-slaue , a Rogue , to establish Lawes , or to censure those Trades wherein he hath no skill ? But I now see how I haue erred , in speaking against that , which I cannot helpe , and whereof there is so little amendment to bee expected . For I would willingly indure thy taunts , and bearè thy reproches , so that there might either punishment or remedy be giuen to this honourable kind of theeuing , though my owne father should stretch for it , and giue the Gallowes it's first handsell . Let it runne on as it doth ; for the reformation of such important things as these , and other of greater moment , grow daily worse and worse ; their a a Andar de capa cayda . To go with their Cloake fallen , is a phrase that is vsed of those , who go loosing both their substance , and their credit . Cloake is falne ( as it is in the Prouerbe ) from off their shoulders . But what doth this belong vnto me ? for me to speake against it , is to cry out vpon the Woolfe , where none will come to helpe mee , to stoppe the Sunne in its course , and to preach in the wildernesse .

But I returne to that , which they layd most to his charge ; which was , That he was apprehended and imprisoned , for that which thou thy selfe sayest , How a Iudge & a Scrivano may be bad . or that hath beene dictated vnto thee by others . But for that he was rich and wealthy , and ( as some say ) for that he had an Alcalde to his father , and a a a The Spanish word 〈◊〉 Elcrivano . i. Scriba publicus , ●…rvus publicus , qui acta in ludicio , vel extra Iudicium , notis vel literis excipit . Vt constat Lege , non vaum . 18. §. de adoptionibus . Besides that which is alledged by Don Iuan Vela in his Tract de poenis delictorum , cap. 24. de Notario falsum committente . Notarie to his Gossip , he by that meanes came off , and was freed . For there were sufficient proofes and euidences brought against him ; and such suspicions to induce beliefe , as might haue seru'd the turn to haue turn'd him ouer . But one puls me by the sleeue , and tels me in mine eare , Do you heare , Sir ? Suspicion is no proofe , and naked signes , are not of themselues capable of chastisement . I did looke for this conclusion from thee ; assuring my selfe beforehand , that thou wouldst take them all to be old Wiues tales , when they meet at the Bake-house to set their bread into the Ouen ; that they are all lies , and false testimonies , maliciously vrged against him . And seeing I haue auow'd , and made good one part vnto thee , thou wilt not deny , but that I haue reason to defend the other , and to giue thee my reasons for it . I say then , that to haue Scrivanos , or Notaries , ( I may so terme them ) to be a mans Gossips , is a bare title , that onely suites it selfe according to the Money , wherewith euery one wageth Law . For in blearing the sight , and picking a mans purse before his face , some haue the soule and conscience of your Gypsies , and will make of Iustice a matter of iuggling , with a hye passe , and a repasse , come off Iacke with a whim-wham ; ordering things so , as they shall thinke good , and may make most for their profit : so that it shall neither be in the power of the Plaintiffe or Defendant to impeach it , nor in the Aduocate to dispute the right , nor in the Iudge to sentence it .

And lest that I should chance to forget it , I pray , hearken by the way to that , which in the Church of S. Gil , in Madrid , was deliuered to the Lords of the supreme Councell , by a learned Preacher , vpon a certaine Friday in Lent . A discourse of a worthy Preacher against Notaries . By way of discourse , he ranne thorow all the ministers of Iustice , till he came to the Scrivano , or Notary , or Register , ( or what in that kind you please to call him ) which he purposely forbore to speake of , as reseruing that dish for the last seruice , and then with these words , he set it before them : Here my Cart stickes fast , and is so clogg'd with durt and myre , and so surrounded and wedged in , as it were , on euery side with filth and mucke , that I know not in the world how to get it out , vnlesse the Angell of God returne once againe to the fish-poole . I confesse ( my Lords ) that for these thirty yeeres and vpwards , I haue seene and heard the Confessions of many sinners ; who hauing falne into one sinne , haue falne againe many times into the same . And yet all these , ( by Gods helpe , and his goodnesse and mercy towards them ) haue reformed both their liues and consciences , and become good liuers , and haue all put on amendment . The Wencher , that hath lyen at racke and manger , and stood at continuall Liuery , time , and a filthy Queane hath tam'd him . The Gamester , a Master of a Dicing-house , or Keeper of an Ordinary , makes him in the end to see his error ; who like a Horse-leech , goes from one to another , sucking by little and little their blood from them . To day thou winnest , to morrow thou lofest ; the money runnes round , and still it remaineth , but they that play , I am sure , remaine without it . The famousest Thiefe , feare and shame reformeth . The rash Railer , the b b The Spanish word perlesia , signifieth also Prelacie . As if the way to get preferment , were to rayle vpon Gouern●…ment . Palsie , from which few escape . The proud man , his owne miserie doth dis-deceiue him , being conscious to himself , that he is but durt . The Lyer , the ill language , and the affrents , which are daily cast in his teeth , put a bridle vpon his tongue . The vnaduised Blasphemer , the continuall reprehensions of his friends and kinsfolkes correct and amend him . All these , either early or late , at one time or another , reape some fruit , and cast off ( like the Snake ) their old skinne , although perhaps ( within ) they wring hard for it .

In all , and euery one of these , haue I found some markes and signes of their saluation : Onely in the Scriuener , I misse in my account , and am quite out of my reckoning , nor doe I finde in him any amendment at all ; but is iust the same man to day , that he was yesterday ; this yeere , as he was thirty yeeres since ; for he is still one and the selfe-same man : Nor doe I know to whom , or how he confesseth , nor who absolueth him : ( I speake of him , who doth not faithfully exercise his Office ) for they informe , and write downe that , which they thinke fit , and for two ducats , or to pleasure a friend , or to doe a shee-creature a courtesie ( for your mantles , are great meddlers , and your women , not the worst sollicitours : ) they take away this mans life , that mans honour , and a third mans wealth ; setting the gate wide open to an infinit number of sinnes , in their insatiable couetousnesse , in their canine and dogge-like appetite , through the heate of that infernall fire that is in their soule : which makes them to swallow downe without chewing , bee it good or bad ; right , or wrong , another mans goods . And because euer and anon , vpon euery slight occasion , they take that which is not their due ; and for that the money that is put into the palmes of their hands , their fist beeing well greased therewith , is in an instant conuerted into flesh and bloud , and incorporated into one & the selfesame substance with themselues ; they haue no more power to cast it off from them , then they haue to shake off the World , or the diuell , who sit so close vnto them , that they can hardly be remoued . So that it seemeth vnto me , that when any such is saued , ( for it cannot be , that all should bee such , as I haue heere taken vpon me to treat of ) at his entrance into glory , the Angels fulfilled with ioy , will cry out one to another , Laetamini in Domino , A Scriuener come into Heauen , new fruit , new . For Scriueners are not pomi Paradisi , such fruit growes not there : And with this he ended his Sermon . But let it passe and goe for currant , that some good may be wrought vpon a Scriuener , and that there may be some hope his soule may bee saued , by changing his former course of life ; yet for all this , fall backe , fall edge , goe which way you will to worke with him , he will be well inough able to answere for himselfe , by A defence of Scriueners , though a weake one . laying an excuse vpon his faults ( for iron also may be guilded ) and then will he tell you that these are the rates of old , and that they take no more but their wonted fees , that victuals and other things grow still dearer and dearer , and the meanes to maintain them , worse and worse . That the Kings rents and prices are variable ; that they had not their Offices for nothing , but paid soundly for them ; and therefore must licke himselfe whole as well as he can , sauing himselfe harmelesse out of other mens gettings : And that there is no reason but that he should bee well paid for the imployment of his person , and his paines taking . This hath been the course of all ages , and for ought I see , is like still so to continue : Howbeit , Aristotle tels vs , That the greatest wrong , that Aristotles saying . can be offered to a Commonwealth , is the sale of Offices .

And Cleomenes the Spartane , being demanded how a Kingdome might come to be happy , made answere , When a King should not respect his priuate profit . A saying of Cleomenes . But for a Iudge that comes freely by his place , to whom , they haue giuen the Title of gracious Lord , in hope that he will doe the office of God , which Iudges are Gods . is , to doe Iustice , and to shew Mercy , ( and therefore are called Gods vpon earth ) that to such a one it should be imputed , that he sels Iustice ; omitting to punish the bad , and to reward the good ; and that hee will salue and couer a fault in a lewd fellow , or saue a notorious offender from the gallowes ; I absolutely deny it , and proue this my proposition by plaine and euident Reasons . For who can thinke , that there should be in the world a Iudge so ill , so vnorderly , so impudent and so shamelesse ( for such a one must he be , that will doe such things ) tho a mountaine of gold should make his Mace , or rod of A bad Iudge , and his conditions . iustice to bend , and compell him to breake the Law ? Howbeit , there are some abroad in the world , who sticke not to say , that this suing for Offices , and seates of Iustice , goes by certaine indirect pathes , and by-wayes , vnusuall courses out of the common track , & vn-accustomed ; or ( to speake more properly ) by false reports and forged Relations , whereof they make benefit , and grow thereby into great Estates . And after that they once grow warme in their places , & see that they are surely setled in them , they then make vp their stocke againe , and set vp for themselues , and begin to play their prizes , raking and scraping at whatsoeuer comes within their reach ; like vnto the Polypus , a a A Fish that hath many feet wherewith to catch his prey . Deriued from the Greeke word 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 , Multus & 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 , pes . or Cuttle Fish , that hath many clawes ( like so many Wyers ) to catch his prey . There is not a pore , or ioynt in all his body , but is either a mouth to swallow , or a paw to take hold , if you once come within his clutches . Heere he seazeth on Wheat , there on Barley ; heere Wine , there Oyle , besides flitches of Bacon , cloathes both woollen & linnen , silks of all sorts , Iewels , money ; from the Hangings in the dining Chamber , to stoope so low as the spice-boxe in the Kitchen ; from the Masters-bed , to the Mules Cratch ; from the purest wheat in the granarie , to the very straw and chaffe that lyes at the barnes doore , choosing rather to play at small game , then to sit out . From which terrible griping , and violent hold-fast , nothing can vn-hitch them but deaths flesh-hooke . For , when the hand takes a bribe , and they once begin to be corrupted , there is no ho with them , they are marred for euer after by an euill vse , and neuer come to be good . And so they receiue with open hand all manner of Bribes , as if they were men in pay , and what they wrongfully take , were true wages , and lawfull fees . So , that they obserue not Iustice , they winke at theeues , because they offer vnto them the first fruits and tithes of their thefts : they haue gotten the fauour of some Courtier , to beare them out in that , which they haue bought for their money : wherevpon they relying , cast away all feare of wresting and peruerting Iustice .

Thus is it , in all your Officers of Iustice , as well with your royall Merchant , as your Retayler ; your Alcalde , as your Alguazil ; your Iudge , as your Petty-fogger ; with him that selleth in grosse , as him that selleth by retayle ; your Iusticer is the Merchant ; your Petty-fogger , the Pedler . And ( for their better thriuing in the world ) euery one hath his bonus Genius , or Angell of guard , either bought out-right for his money , ( or at least so settled vpon him , that it can hardly be alienated from him , ) for those impertinent necessities of the body ; besides that , which God hath giuen them for those that import the Soule . So that they haue two Genij , ( as men for the more surety wil haue two strings to their Bowe : ) The Court Genius , which is the Protector of their bodily goods ; and Gods good Angell , that is the Protector of their soules .

So that out of all this , you see something may be gathered , and happely a great part of it too true ; yet for all this , we must not hence presume to conclude of all : But he that shall fall through couetousnesse into the like basenesse , which perhaps may be one of a thousand , and the same some base-born Slaue , an ill-bred fellow , or of a vile and abiect minde , thou needest not wish him greater harme , or worse misfortune , then hath already lighted vpon him ; for The punishment that an ciull Iudge receiueth . he carries with him his owne chastisement ; He is pointed at ( where-euer hee goes ) with the finger ; he is murmured at by men ; he is abhorred of the Angels ; and both in publike , and in priuate , hath euery mans mouth against him : yet must we not for their sakes condemne the rest , or thinke all to bee made of the same lumpe . And if some particular person finde himselfe aggrieued , and complaine , that he hath receiued hard measure , wise men will consider ( as a thing to be necessarily presupposed ) that suites of Law , being in number so infinit ; in nature , so differing ; and in their ends so diuerse and difficile to be decided , it is not possible that one iudgement should content both sides ; or one Iudge ( though neuer so indifferent ) please both parties . There will ( while the world stands ) be some querrulous men , either with , or without reason , haue they cause , or not cause . Therefore , thou must first weigh , and What he sho●…ld doe , that 〈◊〉 a suite in Law . consider well with thy selfe , that these things , ( I meane your Law-suites ) will require a great deale of care , a great deale of skill , and a great deale of cunning . And if thou be wanting to thy selfe in these thy diligences , and take not the right course , the blame will lye in thy selfe . Nor is it any maruell , Que pi●…rdas tu derecho , no sabiendo hazer tu hecho : That for want of good information , thou shouldest lose thy right , and miscarry in thy suite , so that the fault is not so much the Iudges , as thine owne . But that the Iudge should deny to doe iustice , because many times hee does not giue sentence on his side , who perswades himselfe that he is in the right , it is because hee failes peraduenture in his proofes , or for that his Aduersarie made a bad cause good , and the other a good cause bad , by the euill carriage of the businesse . ( For much aduantage doth consist in the handling of a cause . ) Or else through the negligence of the partie ; or for that hee wants meanes and money to follow his suite ; or for that his opposite is too powerfull for him . And therefore it is not good to taxe the Iudges , muchlesse those , that are seated in those higher Thrones , and superiour tribunall seates , where there are many good & choise men , euen the best that the Kingdome affoordeth . And suppose , some one Iudge or other out of passion , would rashly and vnaduisedly precipitate himselfe , not caring which end went forward ( be it right , or be it wrong , ) yet the rest will not doe so , they beare a better minde , and will not sticke to withstand him to his face .

I remember that a Labuador in Granada , a good crafty Clowne , did ( for his owne priuate profit ) follow a suite very hard in open Court , against the Lord of the towne where he dwelt . Thinking with himselfe , that he had to doe with Pero Crespo , the Townes Alcalde , or Constable ( if I may so stile him ) of the Parish , and that he could haue drawne the Oydores , or Iudges ( appointed to heare his cause ) by the eares , and led them along as hee listed ; standing one day in the Plaça nueua , or the new-Market-place , gazing hard , & looking busily on the Porch , by which you enter into the Chancery , which is one of the famousest buildings ( for it's bignesse ) that is in all Spaine ; and whereunto ( for not onely the curiousnesse of the Arches and Vaults , but for the faire carriage of businesse ) there is not any in these times knowne to be equall vnto it : after he had well viewed it , he perceiued that the Kings Armes that were placed in the Frontispice , had for it's two Supporters , Iustice , and Fortitude . Another Country fellow of his acquaintance , seeing him stand thus gaping as if hee had nothing to doe , asked him , why hee did not goe in to sollicite his businesse ? He told him , I begin to thinke with my selfe , that these things are not for me , and therefore I could wish my selfe at home againe . Why ( quoth his friend ? ) Why , said he ? because Iustice is heere seated so high , that it is in vaine A witty saying of a Country fellow . for me to looke to haue her stoope vnto me , and I am not able to reach vp vnto her , and therefore would I were well at home .

It is no maruell then ( as I said before ) that a Iudge doe not Iustice now and then to some men , though they haue Law on their side ; but it would seeme somewhat strange , that a man should haue a sentence goe on his side , that hath not wit to defend his cause . But my father found sentence in his fauour , because hee had beene beaten to those kindes of businesses , and knew the trace of them , and was well able to hold plea. Besides , when hee had the torment giuen him , and was put ( as we heere tearme it ) vpon the rack , he cleered himselfe of those imputations that were laid vpon him , and attainted those witnesses that were brought against him of publike malice , prouing that they had deposed against him vpon idle and vaine presumptions , and vpon weake and feeble grounds .

But heere ( mee thinkes ) I heare a Murmurer muttering forth his malice , telling me , That my father had a very ill report : That hee curled his hayre , painted his face , and did diuers other things , which I passe ouer with silence , and willingly omit to speake of : That moneys were still stirring , and came tumbling in on euery side , besides gifts and presents , which comming from two opposite parties , continually crossed one another . Whereunto I may adde the sollicitation of women , who are not the worst Aduocates , or the least importunate Suitors . All which put together , leaue such a thorne or sting in my finger , that I dare not touch vpon them . O thou man of malediction , thou doest presse me too too hard , thou doest weary , & tyre me out ; I purpose this bout onely , to giue thee the best satisfaction I can , and not to answer any more to thy replyes ; for it were but to proceed in infinitum , and neuer to make an end , to waight vpon thy Sophistries , and friuolous questions . And therefore I doe not tell thee , that thou shootest at randome , speakest non sequiturs , and such like things , wherein thou canst not preuaile as thou wouldst , nor make thy part good ; for as much as the truth thereof is otherwise already determined . Yet , when suites goe thus , they giue occasion of much mislike and offence ; but there is no remedy , and we must bee contented with it , as things that can not sometimes bee possibly auoided : But God deliuer thee from such a Iudge , qui habet Legem in scrinio pectoris , that interpreteth the Law as hee listeth himselfe , and as his owne conceit shall leade him , hauing neither Text , nor Doctor on his side to make good that hee doth ; and from a Notarie , that is thine enemy , or any other of those kinde of creatures , that are bribed : for they will falsifie orders for their profit , and register things otherwise , then they were reported in Court . But in case thou wilt be carried away with opinion , and the voice of the Vulgar , ( which is euermore Vox populi non modo est infirma , sed ●…psa insi●…mitas , & morbus . the weakest , and least true , according to the subiect from whence it comes ) tell me , not out of the peoples talke , ( whereunto little credit is to be giuen ) but to speake like a wise man , ( out of thine owne discretion and iudgement , ) whether all that which thou hast said , be sufficient to proue , that my Father was ( vndoubtedly ) faulty .

Besides , if it be the receiued opinion of some Physicians , that the vsing of Complexions , and such like slibber-slabbers , is a kinde of infirmitie and sicknesse Against painting . in it selfe , who can say , whether my father were sound or no ? And as for your curling of pates , crisping of haires , and other greater dishonesties , and vnseemelier sights then these , I doe not commend them ; nor allow of those , who permit them in Spaine .

But that which I saw with mine owne eyes , for that time that I knew him , and was conuersant with him , I am able to tell thee what manner of man my Father was . Hee was of a faire complexion , ruddy , well coloured , cleane and soft , was the graine of his skinne , and his hayre curled , which on Omnium colorum homo . my conscience was naturall vnto him : He had a full eye , and that full of life , resembling in colour the watry Turquoys . He ware a foretop , and those his Locks , which ouerspred his Temples , to giue them the greater grace , curled themselues into rings of hayres . And if God had giuen him these colours , as prope●… to him , was it fit ( thinke you ) that he should besoot his face with the same paintings ? or is it likely , that he would make such slight reckoning of these faire pledges of Gods goodnes , & imbrace such counterfet stuffe to the ill example of others ? But if it be true , as thou saist , that he made vse of oyntments , greasie ingredients , slabber-sawces , gals of beasts , and the like artifices ; and that those teeth , and hands , which did so much commend him , that all this , I say , should be done by the vertue of certaine Powders , Oxe-gals , Lees , Latherings , and other such sluttish and beastly confections , I shall then ingeniously acknowledge whatsoeuer thou shalt say of him , and shall be a capitall enemy not onely vnto him , but to all those that shall practise the like . For besides , that they are effeminate actions , fitting onely wanton wenches , and light huswiues , they giue occasion to men , to murmure against them , and breed a iust suspition of basenesse in the vilest degree , when they shall see Painting had , both in a soule , & in a faire woman , but worst of all in a man . them thus dawbed ouer with clay , and wholly composed of those things that are onely permitted vnto women ; who , because they haue not sufficient beauty of themselues , borrow it from paintings , and varnishings , to the great cost , both of their health , and purse . And ( which to see , is a thousand pities ) that your foule , and worst fauoured women , are not onely those that do this , but euen your fairest , and those that are most beholding to Nature : who thinking thereby to seeme fairer , and to make Nature appeare more louely in Arts dressing , begin this worke betimes in the morning in their bed , and finish it at noone , when the Cloth is layd . So that I say , ( and not without reason ) Que la muger , quanto mas mirare la cara , tanto mas destruye la casa : That a woman , the more curious she is about her face , the more carelesse she is about her house ; the repairing of the one , being the ruining of the other . If this then ( euen in women ) be blame-worthy , how much more shall it bee in men ? O filthinesse , aboue all other filthinesse ! O affront , aboue all other affronts ! that God hauing giuen thee one face , thou shouldst abuse his image , and make thy selfe another . Thou canst not twit mee in the teeth , that my loue to my father hath blinded me , or that my naturall affection to my Country hath bribed me , nor shalt thou euer find me out of reason , or in ought that I shall say , to swerue from the truth . But if there be any discharge or satisfaction in a thing that is euil , I wil tel thee one curiositie , because it fals out patt for this place , and did succeed all , as it were about one and the selfe-same time . Dulce est socios habuisse dolorum . To thee it will serue for counsell ; to me , for comfort , as a common ●…uill , that goes not without its fellowes .

In the yeere 1512. ( a little before Rauenna was sack't ) there were cruell warres in Italy . And in this very Citty , ( I meane Rauenn . ) there was borne a strange Monster , which did strike the beholders into great admiration and caused much wonder . He had from the girdle vpward , all his whole body , face , and head , like vnto a man , sauing that he had one horne in his forehead : he wanted his armes , but in stead thereof , Nature had giuen him two wings like a Bat : he had figured in his brest , the Pythagoricall ( Y ) and in his stomacke downe to his belly , a well-formed Crosse , or Crucifix . He was an Hermaphrodite , both those two naturall Sexes , beeing in a very proportionable manner well and truly formed : he had no more but one thigh , and to it one legge with its foot like a Kites , and the tallons answerable thereunto . In the knotty part , or locking ioynt of the knee , he had one onely eye . These monstrosities and vnnaturall shapes possessed mens minds with extraordinary admiration ; and those that were learned men , and great Schollers , considering with themselues , that such monsters in nature were vsually prodigious , and did foretoken some strange effects , did beate their braines , and exercise the strength of their wit , in the speculation and search of the signification thereof , and what this strange Monster might portend . And amongst many other that were giuen , onely this that followeth , was well receiued amongst them : That the horne did signifie Pride , and Ambition ; the wings , Inconstancie and Lightnesse : want of armes , want of good workes : the foot , of that bird of rapine , Theft , Vsury , and Auarice : the eye in the knee , affection to vanities and worldly things : the two Sexes , Sodomy , and beastly filthinesse ; in all which vices , all Italy did then abound . For the which , God did scourge them with that his whip of warres and dissentions . But the Crosse and the Y were good and fortunate signes ; for the Y in the brest did signifie Vertue : and the Crosse on the belly , that if men ( suppressing their dishonest lusts of the flesh , should imbrace vertue in their brests , God would giue them peace , sweeten his displeasure , and abate his wrath .

You see here , ( in a case prohibited ) that when the whole current ran with a troubled water , my father followed along with the streame , and did as others did , and was not the sole and onely offender . And therefore more worthy shalt thou be of blame , if thou shalt offend , hauing beene brought vp in a schoole of Christianity , and taught by example what to auoyd . God lend vs his helping hand , that we may not fall into other the like miseries : for all of vs , euen the best of vs , we are but men .

CHAPTER II.

Guzman de Alfarache goes on , in recounting who were his Parents , and declareth withall who his Mother was ; and for our better instruction , describes the euill conditions , and bad qualities of a lewd woman , of Bawdes ; of a sensuall and lasciuious man , and that the end of dishonest Loue , is the wasting of a mans honour , of his wealth , and of himselfe .

BVT that I may returne againe to my Storie , I told you before , ( if my memory doe not faile mee ) that ( hauing performed his penance ) my father came to Seuill for to recouer his debt ; whereupon Law was waged , many offers made either to giue or take ; some demands , and some answers : and if he had not thorowly purged himselfe for his health , and found an euasion ; that is , if he had not well cleared himselfe of being a Renegado , it would haue broken out vpon him into the scurfe of the head , or the scratches in the pasternes ; all the fat had lyen in the fire , and he had beene quite blowne vp . But he had wrought such a cure vpon himselfe , and handled the businesse so handsomely , that they could not catch hold of him for hauing the Leprosie , or the dry scab . All things were so well made vp , that they could not find a hole in his coate , or make any marke or white , to shoot at him ; so well was he prouided for all commers . Meanes were vsed on both sides , composition offered , but not accepted ; the one being vnwilling to Guzmans father compounds with his Creditors ; growes rich , and takes his pleasure . pay all , the other as loth to lose all . Of this spilt water , hee gathered vp as much as he could , making the best of a bad bargaine . And with that which came to his share ( be it what it will ) it so well serued his turne , that the cards once more were dealt round againe , and he come into very good play . His incomes were such , and his lucke so great , that in a very short time , hee gained not onely where-withall to dine , but also to sup . Hee built him a prety handsome house , he sought to plant and settle himselfe in those parts , hee bought him land of inheritance ; he had a Garden in San Iuan de Alfarache ; a neat one it was , and of much recreation and pleasure , distant from Seuill little more then halfe a League ; whither many dayes , especially in the Summer time , he went for his passe-time , and made many banquets . It happened , that the Merchants made a Burse or Pawne for their contractations at the stayres of the great Church , ( like that of Saint Felipe at Madrid ) with a place to walke in , which went round about it , hauing a Parapet or Wall brest-high on the outside of it , to separate it from the open street , girt in with great Marble pillars , and strong chaines of yron . My father walking there with other Merchants , there chanced a Christening to passe by . And ( as the talke there went ) this child was said to be the secret sonne , or ( to speake plaine English ) bastard to a certaine person , that shall be namelesse . My father followed in the tayle of the troope , and entred in after them euen to the very Font , for to see and view my mother ▪ who with a certaine old Knight of the military habit , ( who Guzmans●…other ●…other and 〈◊〉 w●…man : Her condition . for to maine the honour of his Order , liued by the Rents of the Church ) were Partners in this Ceremonie : it was a metall'd thing , a lusty liuely wench , yet graue enough withall ; her carriage was very gracefull , and full of courtesie , her selfe young ; beautifull , discreet , modest , and of a well composed and settled behauiour . Her handsome feature needes no other commender , then it selfe . He stood steddily looking vpon her , all the while that the Exercise of that Sacrament gaue him leaue so to do , beeing astonisht to behold so rare a beauty , if not besotted with it . For , to that her naturall beauty of face , and feature of body , ( without any tricking or painting at all ) all was so curious and fitly placed thorow that whole frame of nature , that one part helping another , and all put together into one piece , did make such a delicate contexture , that no pensill can reach to expresse its perfection ; nor imagination conceiue , how to make it better . The parts , and fashion of my father , I haue already largely laid open vnto you : this goodly creature , ( for they seeme gods and not men , who are not touched with naturall affections ) began to perceiue his earnest eying of her , and did not a little reioyce in it , howsoeuer she did dissemble it . For there is not any woman , ( though neuer so Women loue to be eyed , and to be lookt vpon . proud , be she of high or low degree ) but does take comfort , and chucke for ioy , to be beheld and looked vpon with an hungry eye , be the man neuer so base , neuer so meane . Their eyes being their interpreters , though their tongues were silent , spake plaine language each to other : manifesting by them their hearts ; for soules on such occasions do not admit of maskes , neither will willing minds yeeld to the vaile and muffler . For that time , there passed no more betwixt them , nor ought else done , saue onely that he came to know , that she was that Knights Pawne ; his iewel , his delight , a morsell that he kept for his owne mouth , ouer whom he was wondrous wary , and so tenderly affected , that he could scarce indure to haue her out of his sight . In fine , this Gentlewoman went directly home to her house , and my father was at his wits end , not knowing in the world how to put her out of his mind . He vsed , that hee might come to the sight of her againe , many extraordinary diligences : but , vnlesse when she went foorth to Masse vpon some solemne Feast-dayes , he could not otherwise see her for a long time together .

The often falling drop , hollowes the hardest stone that is ; and stedfast perseuerance still gets the victory : for continuance crowneth our actions , and disposeth them to their intended ends . Hee plodded so long on the matter , that he found out a tricke to serue his turne , vsing the meanes of a good old beldame , a reuerent Matron forsooth , an honest Bawd , one of my charitable Aunts : for such ministers as these doth the Diuell set aworke , and employ in his seruice ; with which secret Mynes , he ouerturnes the strongest towers of the chastest women : for that they may better themselues in their rayment , seeking to gaine a widowes habit , a Huke , or a Mantle , and that their little Caskets may be stored with Boxes of Marmalet ; there is no trecherie which A Bawde , and her condition . they will not attempt ; no filthinesse , which they will not sollicite ; no blood , which they will not draw foorth ; no chastity , which they will not spot ; no cleannesse , which they will not fully ; no wickednesse which they will not bring to passe . This good creature then , being courted by him with words , and rewarded by him with deeds , went and came to and fro with papers : And because the Principles , as they are the first , so the hardest to learne ; and because the greatest difficultie consists in the beginning ; and for that , Loaues go aside , if they be not well set into the Ouen , she molded the businesse well , vsing the best sleights she had . And because my father had heard of old , That Money ouercome all difficulties , especially with women . money leuelleth the greatest difficulties , and makes all things plaine and easie , he did euer manifest his faith by his workes , because they should not condemne it to be dead and fruitlesse . He was neuer negligent , nor yet no niggard . He began ( as I told you ) by this womans hand , to sow the seeds of his loue , and prodigally to spend vpon my mother ; and they both , very willingly , and very cheerefully , are ready to receiue all . And because vnto goodnes , gratitude is so due a debt ; and that he who receiueth , is bound to a requitall , and euery courtesie deserues its acknowledgement This good mother of mischiefe did play her part so well , grew such a good Sollicitor , and followed the businesse so close , that her diligence meeting in a happy coniuncture , with the forwardnesse of my Mothers will , she still went adding more fuell to the fire ; and of a little light stubble , raised in a short time a terrible flame . As we see many times , ieasting turned into earnest ; and things full often to end in sober sadnesse , which at the first , were but begun in ieast .

My Mother ( as ye haue already heard ) was a discreet woman ; faine shee would , but durst not ; she had a good mind to the businesse , but yet she was afraid : she was sometimes on , sometimes off ; her owne heart was the Oracle of her desires ; with that she consulted often , what were best to do . And thus disputing pro and con with herselfe , ya lo tenia de la haz , ya delenues . Somtimes ( as we see in the handling of Stuffes , or of Cloth ) she was on the right , sometimes on the wrong : one while she would put on a full resolution to doe thus and thus ; by and by againe , she would turne to a new Coniugation , and vary the Mood she was in before . In conclusion , whom will not siluer win ? whom will not gold corrupt ? This Knight was an elderly man , much subiect to spitting , spalling , and coughing , he was troubled with the Stone , with sharpnesse of his Vrine , and other the like infirmites : she had seene him full oft by her sweet side in the naked bed ; where he did not appeare the man my father was , he had not that vigour , nor liuelinesse , nor that handsomenesse of shape and proportion . And besides , obserue it while you liue , and you shal euermore find it to be true , That long acquaintance , and much conuersation , ( where Gods feare is not ) breeds wearisomnesse , and loathsomenesse at the last . Nouelties please all , especially women , who are louers of flim-flam Nouelties please women . tales , and for the receiuing and returning of newes ; like vnto Materia prima , which neuer ceaseth to desire and seeke after new Formes . She was resolued to haue forsaken the old Knight , to shift her of her old clothes , to change her smocke , and was fully bent to fly out , and to breake loose , whatsoeuer came of it : but her great wisedome , and long experience , which was hereditary vnto her , and suckt from her mothers teat , opened the way , and presented A woman , wise in wickednesse , what one she is . vnto her an ingenious resolution . And questionlesse , the feare of losing her pension , kept her aloofe off , the thought whereof much perplexed her for the present , who otherwise was of her selfe well egged forward , and had a good mind to the game . For what lesson my Father read but once vnto her , the Diuell repeated the same ten times ouer ; so that it was no such great matter now to winne Troy ; there was likelihood inough to take it in lesse then ten yeeres .

My good Mother casts vp her account , and made this reckoning with her selfe : In this particular , my person loseth nothing , I sell no houshold stuffe , I waste none of my goods ; and though in this kind , I affoord much kindnesse to others , I am therein like vnto the Candle , or the Sunne in its brightnesse , though I lend light vnto others , I haue nothing the lesse my selfe : I shall not want awhit in my estate , but be rather still at the full . Of whom I haue receiued so many courtesies , so many gifts , it is fit , I should in some sort shew my selfe thankfull , and not be sparing to him , that hath beene so bountifull to me . Shall I be couetous , when he is so liberall ? God forbid . I am now resolued what to do : I will sow my bagge at both ends , my iawes shall grind on both sides , my chaps shall walke euery way ; and the better to secure my shippe , I will haue two anchors to one bottome ; that if I should chance to lose the one , I might still haue another remaining to serue my turne . And if the mansion-house should hap to fall , yet if the Doue-house hold vp , if that stand fast , we shall lacke no Pigeons , as long as there is a Louer-hole for the poore fooles to get in at .

Hauing taken these things into her consideration , she treated with this her bawdy Embassadresse , how , and when it might be ; the manner , how ; and the time when . But finding ( after long consultation ) that it was impossible to effect her desires in her owne house , and that there was no good to be done at home , for to enioy each other freely , & to take that fulnesse of content , which must satisfie the hungry mawes of greedy Louers , amongst many other shifts and tricks , and very good and witty deuices , and strange plots , which they had laid their heads about , for the better successe in the businesse , they made choyse of this which followeth .

The Spring had so farre aduanced it selfe , that May was in it's ending , and the Summer was now making his entrance . And the Village of Gelues , and that of * * Alfarache , a place of recreation neere vnto Seuill : And it 's rare pleasures . San Iuan de Alfarache , are now the sweetest and the pleasantest of all that bordring Territory , none thereabouts was like vnto them ; besides , the fertilen●…sse and goodnesse of the soyle ( which is all one with that of Seuill , as next neighbour vnto it ) which that Riuer of a a Guadalquibir is a famous Riuer , which thwarteth all Andaluzia : it empties it selfe into the Sea , neere to San Lucar de Barrameda . It is a great Riuer , whose head rises in the Sierra de Sigura , or Alcaçar , anciently called Tabigensis : from whese spring-head , to the Sea , it runnes more then 60. Leagues ; it 's ancient name was Betis : from whence that Prouince is called Betica , of Betus the 6. 〈◊〉 . of Spaine . Or from the Greeke word 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 , which signifies Deepe . Some say it is a Ch●…ldee word , and signifies a House . For that it is the receptacle whither al other Riuers enter in , as into a house . Some call it Thuria , of 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 , which signifies , impetuous , proud , &c. Vide Couarruuias , and Esteban de Garrib . l. 5. c. 4. fol. 128. Guadalquibir , makes the more famous . whose watry gullets purling along the bankes , in-rich and adorne all those gardens and fields , that confine thereupon : so that with reason ( if there may be a knowne Paradise vpon earth ) sure the name thereof properly appertaines to this particular seate : So fairely is it set forth with shadow-casting trees , so beautified with curious bowers , so richly inameled with sundry sorts of flowers , so abounding with sauoury fruits , so accompanied with siluer-running streames , with cleere springs , glasse-labour-sauing fountaines , fresh ayres , and delightsome shades , whereinto the beames of the Sunne are at that time denied their entrance , and haue not permission so much as once to peepe in . At one of these retiring roomes of recreation , my mother agreed with her marriage-maker ; her Sine qua , non ; and some of the people of her house , to come one day thither to make merry . And albeit the place , whither they were to goe , was not that which my father was owner of , but was somewhat beyond it , neerer vnto Gelues ; yet of force they must , to goe thither , passe close by our doore .

Vpon this care taken , and former agreement concluded betweene them , iust about the time that she was to come neere vnto our garden gate , my Mother began presently to complaine of a sudden and grieuous paine in her stomake , imputing the cause thereof to the coldnes of the morning , and the freshnesse of the weather , and did so cunningly dissemble the pangs and gripings she indured , that they were faigne to take her downe from her b b Xamuga . A womans saddle with a Chaire . Xamuga , which for her more ease in her iourney , was borne by a pretty little , but sure-footed c c A Sardinian Asse , of all Asses , is the least . A notable subtilty of Guzmans Mother , for the inioying of his Father , before she came to bee his Wife . Sardinian Asse . She feigned such extremities of torture , made such pittifull faces , and such wofull gestures ( holding her hand as hard as shee could for her life vpon her belly , crushing and wringing it with all the might and maine she could : ) then would she let them loose againe , then claspe them together , and wring each finger through anguish of her paine : other-while she would hang the head , as if she were fainting and ready to swoune ; and that fit past , fetching a deepe sigh or two , she fell to vnlacing and vnbracing her selfe , that all that were about her ( saue those that were priuy to the plot ) did verily beleeue that she was wonderfully and mightily tormented , that shee made them to melt into teares , and to haue a compassionate feeling of this her affliction . Diuers passengers chanced in the interim to come by , and euery one proposed his remedy ; so many men , so many medicines ; but because they knew not for the present where to haue the things that should be applyed , nor where to haue a fit place for to minister vnto her , their medicines were impertinent , and to no purpose in the world . To goe backe vnto the Citie , it was impossible ; to goe further forward , dangerous ; and to abide thus in the high-way , not commodious . Her fits increased , all stood amazed , as not knowing what to doe , nor what course to take . At last , one amongst the rest , that was there ( who was laid there for the purpose ) breakes mee in amongst them , and as he passes the presse , cryes , Roome for the passion of God , make way there , stand farther off , lest you stiffle her for want of ayre . Come , let vs take her , and remoue her out of the high way ; it were cruelty , not to seeke to cure her , and a thousand pitties , that so sweet a creature should bee cast away , for want of care and good looking to . Come , let vs take her in our armes , and put her into this garden house heere hard by , in this case we must be content to take that which comes next to hand .

All approued what hee said , his motion was applauded , and so generally well liked , that it was presently concluded amongst them , That vntill that fit were ouer-past , they should craue leaue of those that kept the house , to giue her entrance , not doubting but she would bee much the better , if they could be but so happy as once to get her within the doores . They knockt hard and thick , ( as men vse to doe when they are in haste ; ) the good woman that kept the house , made show as if she thought her Master had been there : and as she came waddling along , bawled to her selfe : O good God , is it you , Master ? O sweet Iesus ! I pray bee not angry , that I came no sooner , I was very busie , I could not doe withall , I came as soone as I could . These and the like excuses , her vnprofitable chaps mumbled to her selfe .

The old Hagge knew well enough what she had to doe , she might goe in the ranke of those rude Countrie wenches , that make curtsey , and cry , No chero , no sabo ; No forsooth not I , I am a poore silly old Woman , seeming as if she did not know how to say B. to a battle-doore . Yet was she a dissembling Hilding , a crafty old Carrion , one that had learned her lesson before-hand , and receiued her instructions from my father , so that shee was well prepared for the businesse . Besides , she was no Dullard , and for such kinde of imployments she was no Baby , but vnderstood very well in such seruices as these what was fit to be done .

And herein ( amongst other things ) the rich haue this aduantage of the The differen●…e betwixt the poore end the rich Master . poore , That euill seruants will not so easily come to the beck and bend of a poore Master , as well-disposed seruants will be ouer-awed by a rich Master , and wonne to his lewd commands . The poore man , ( though he be neuer so honest ) yet must he yeeld sometimes to the violent disposition of his wilfull and head strong seruants ; whereas honest Country-Swaines , ouer-commanded by their rich Land-lords , become Ministers to their lustfulnesse . So that the poore ( though neuer so good ) hauing ill seruants , are seruants to their seruants . And the rich ( though neuer so bad ) by beeing serued with good seruants , are the onely men that are well serued .

My good old Woman had by this time opened the gate , and either not well remembring , or making show as if she had not knowne them , full of dissimulation , she fell thus vpon them : What a stirre , what a knocking is heere ? The Diuell take you all for me ; beshrew me , if I did not thinke it had beene our Master . The very feare whereof , lest I might haue stayed too long before I let him in , hath not left me one drop of bloud in all my body . It 's very well , what 's the matter now , I pray ? What would you with me ? What is your Worships pleasure ? Haue you any thing to say to mee ? If you haue , let me know your minde , that I may make an end and goe about my businesse ; for I haue something else to doe then to stand thus idly heere .

Then the old Knight answered , and said ; Good woman , I pray afford vs some place in your house , where this Gentlewoman may rest her selfe a while : for a grieuous paine in her stomake , hath befalne her heere vpon the way : she , that kept the house , seeming to resent her paine , and to be much grieued for it , in her rude rusticke manner , sorrowfully replyde :

Now a mischiefe on all such ill lucke ! O what a griefe it is to see , that any paine should proue so vnhappy , as to be thus ill imploy'd vpon so sweet a face , such a dainty bed of red and white Roses ! Come in a Gods name , come in , I pray , for all the house is at your seruice . My Mother , all this while , said not so much as one word , onely she complained of her griefe .

The good old Wench of the house , vsing her with all the kindnesse her Country-fashion could afford , gaue them the liberty of the whole house , bringing them into a lower roome , where , in a well-furnisht bed , there were certaine Colchones , or Mattresses ; these shee presently vnfolded , and hauing A Colchone , is a kinde of Mattresse , quilted with Wooll , and basted with Thread , that the Wooll may not slide and grow into Knots . spred them forth , and made all things fit and handsome , she presently opened a Chest , whence she tooke out a very fine payre of sheetes , that were neat and sweet , a faire Quilt , and a couple of Pillowes ; wherewith shee dressed vp a bed , and made it ready for her to take her rest in . Well might the bed haue beene made , the roome kept cleane , all places sweetned with the burning of perfumes , breathing forth Pomanders , and other the like odoriferous sents , and a breakefast prouided , and many other dainties and delicacies put in a readinesse for to entertaine them withall . All these things , I say , might well haue beene made ready before-hand ; but it was thought fit , that some of them should not be prepared ; as also that the woman that kept the house , should not come at the first knocking , as likewise that the gate should be shut against them , and not be opened vntill they called , that it might not seeme to bee a set match , and lest it might chance to breed some suspition , and so the stratagem a a The Spanish word Eneamisada , signifies a ●…ratagem ; borrowed from the wearing of shirts vpon their Armour , thereby to surprize the enemy on the sudden , and to bee distinguished from their enemies . It is also a Maske , or Mummery . might be discouered , and the maskers made known ; for this dayes plot was meerely no other thing . My Mother , in this her pittifull paine , put off her cloathes , got her to bed , and called euer and anon for warme cloathes ; which being brought vnto her , making as if she had laid them to her belly , she thrust them lower beneath her knees , and somewhat apart from her , because the heat of them did somewhat offend her , fearing lest they might cause some remotion or alteration in her body , whereby qualmes might arise and weaken her stomake : With the helpe of these warme Napkins , she found her selfe much eased , and feigned she had a desire to sleepe , hoping she should bee the better after she had taken some rest .

The poore old Knight , whose chiefest ioy consisted in giuing her content , hauing placed all his happinesse in her welfare , was ( honest Cuckold as hee was ) wonderfully glad of this , and left her all alone in her naked bed . And hauing made fast the doore after him , that none could get in to trouble her , he went forth to recreate himselfe in those Gardens belonging to the house , charging his people to make no noise , and that none should come neere the doore , enioyning stilnesse and silence , and that none of them should dare to open it , till they had farther order from him , or that he came himselfe : And for that honest woman of the house , he willed her that she should watch by her , till she awaked , and that then she should come and call him . My Father in the meane while was not asleepe , but stood with attention hearkening to what was said , and lay peeping out through the Key-hole ( like one that lyes in Ambuscado ) of a certaine back doore , belonging to a little close closet , whither he had retired himselfe , till he could spy his time of aduantage for to sally forth , and surprize that desired fort , which he had long since so cunningly vndermined .

Now , when all was husht and quiet , and that her owne Nurse that came with her , and that other old Bawd of the house , stood like two Sentinels vpon their Watch , ready vpon all occasions , to giue quicke aduice , by a certaine secret signe , which might serue in stead of a watch-word , when the old Knight should make head that way , then did my father issue out at that posterne , or little back-doore of his , that he might see , and conferre with his Mistresse . And at that very instant did her feigned pangs cease , and those truer ones of loue began to manifest themselues , giuing other kinde of twinges , and those kinder for the place affected . In this swelling kinde of sport they continued two long houres , two yeeres being not sufficient to expresse those passages that were betwixt these two new Louers in this their merry fit .

Now the day began to grow hot , and was entring more and more into his heates , which forced the Knight to make his retreat towards the house . Which he did the more willingly , out of the desire which he had to know how his sicke Saint did , whether she were any thing better , and whether they should stay there , or goe forward , or what they were best to doe , these were the lines that led him along to visit her . Vpon his marching thitherward , the Sentinels shot off a warning peece : and my father with great sorrow of heart forsooke the Fort , where hee had set vp his Standard , and retyred backe to his Court of guard , and shut himselfe vp close , where he was before .

Vpon the entring in of her old Gallant , she made show as if she had beene fast asleepe , and was awakened with the noise that hee had made . And with a bended browe , and angry looke , casting her eye a-skew vpon him with a coynesse of language , she turn'd aside from him , accenting her words in a pretty kinde of mournefull fashion , pittying as it were and bemoning her selfe ; Ay me ; God helpe me . Why ( alas ) haue they opened the doore so quickly ? Was there no care , no loue to be showne vnto me , in letting mee sleepe a little longer ? I thought you , of all others , would not haue put me out of so sweet a slumber . But t is no matter , I shall one day ; and with that shee sigh'd , and stop'd , as if she had some-thing else to say , studying more to amuze him , then to declare her selfe .

This good old Knight of ours , this patient peece of flesh , gently made answere : By those eyes of thine , then which I adore nothing more , I did not thinke to wake thee , it grieues me ( pretty soule ) that I haue done thee that wrong ; yet hast thou slept full two houres and more . Two houres ? ( replide my Mother : ) no , nor yet halfe an houre : me thinkes it is but euen now that I beganne to shut mine eyes , and in all my life , I neuer had so quiet and contented a napp , for that little while that it lasted ; ( nor did she lye in all that she said , for she gulled him with a matter of truth : ) and looking with somewhat a more cheerefull countenance vpon him , she much commended the remedy which they had giuen her ; telling them , that they had giuen her her life .

The old Knight was glad to see so much comfort come from her . And by consent of both parties , they agreed to celebrate their feast there , and to passe away as merrily as they could the remainder of that day , for that Garden was no lesse pleasant , then that whither they intended to haue gone . And because their people were not farre off , that had the charge of their prouision ( for the other house was hard by ) they sent to them to bring back their dinner thither , and such other things , as they had brought along with them .

Whilest this businesse was a-doing , my Father found fit opportunity to get out secretly at the other gate , and to returne backe to Seuill : where , euery houre , was a thousand yeeres ; a moment , an Age , and the time of his absence from his new Loue , a present Hell .

Now , when the Sunne was in his declining , which was about fiue in the Euening , mounting vpon his Gennet , as if it had been but his ordinary walke , he came to visit this his house . Wherein he found these gallants , he bid them welcome , and told them he was very glad to see them there , onely hee was sorry for the mishap , which caused their stay . For he no sooner came in , but they told him all that had past . His carriage was courteous ; his voice lowd and shrill , but not very cleere : He made them many discreet , and faire offers , ( for hee had learned a little Courtship ) and they on the other side , remained no whit in his debt for kinde words : So that in the end , there was a great League of friendship professed and confirmed betweene them in publike ; but a stricter tye in secret , betwixt my Father and his Mistresse , for the good pawnes and pledges of Loue , that had lately past between them .

But there is a difference betweene Loue , Friendship , and Good-will The difference that is betwixt Loue , Friendship , and Good-will . Good-will , is that , which I may beare to one that I neuer saw in all my life , nor had any other knowledge of him , then that I haue heard of his vertues , or of his noble disposition , or some other worthy parts in him , which makes me to wish him well , and drawes my affection by a violent kind of motion as it were , to follow after him .

Friendship , we call that , which is commonly concluded betwixt man and man , or one friend with another , vpon some long Treaty or Communication , Similiancie in condition , or some other pledges of loue , and reall courtesies , that haue passed betweene them : so that Good-will , is said to bee betweene those that are absent ; and Friendship , betweene those that are present . But Loue runnes by another kind of course ; it steeres by another Compasse . That must of force be reciprocall , a commutation of hearts , a copy or counterpane of interchangeable kindnesse , a translation of two soules , where each striues with other with all their might and maine , to assist there more , where it loues then where it liues . And this takes its perfection from its obiect ; the perfecter the obiect , the perfecter the Loue : but the truest Loue of all is diuine Loue . And therefore we are to loue God aboue all things , with all our True Loue , what it is . heart , with all our strength , and with all our soule , seeing that he so much loueth vs . Next vnto that , is your Amor coniugalis , that Loue which is betweene a man and his wife , and then that which is betwixt neighbour and neighbour , or one friend towards another . For lewd Loue , and that which What lewd Loue is . is dishonest , ( whose ground growes not from Vertue ) is not worthy of this name of Loue , as being of a bastard-brood .

But hap what may hap , come what will come , fall backe , or fall edge ; wheresoeuer this lewd loue raigneth , there are all your Witchcrafts , as no where in the world more ; there your inchantments , there your Sorceries . This lewd loue is that , which ( like another Circes ) alters the conditions of men , aduentureth thorow all difficulties , and makes them easie ; it is that alone which tameth the strongest and fiercest Lyons . For to say , that there are Philtra , amorous potions , poysons of loue , and the like baits and trickes to force affection , it is all false : for this alone , is sufficient of it selfe to turne a mans braines , to peruert his iudgement , to take away his life , to confound his memory , to draw on diseases , and to occasion sundry shrewd fits either of melancholy , or of madnesse . Loue ought to be free , and to haue the libertie Loue ought to be free . and power to consigne , & deliuer ouer al the faculties of the soule to the thing beloued . For the Alcayde , or Gouernour of a Castle , cannot be sayd to giue vp the Castle , when as by force it is taken from him ; so hee , that shall make loue by indirect and euill meanes , it cannot be truly said that hee loueth , but that he is forced ( contrary to his better will ) and violently carried away with that eager passion of lust and sensualitie , which like a head-strong beast beares a man on headlong to his destruction .

The conuersation went forward , Cards are call'd for , and to play they go . Their game was Primera at three hands ; my mother , she got the money , for my father was willing to lose to her : and it beginning now to waxe night , they gaue off play , and went out into the garden to take the ayre . In the meane while , the Cloth was layd , and their supper brought in , and set on the boord : they sit downe , they eate , and haue sup't . And hauing giuen order against after supper , that a Barge should be made ready for them , and tricked vp with fresh Flagges , and greene Boughs : when they came to the water side , they tooke Boat , and were no sooner lanched foorth into the channell , but they might heare from other Vessels , which went to and fro vpon the riuer , sundry Consorts of all sorts of Musicke , which made a most melodious sound ; being an vsuall and ordinary thing with them , in such a place , and such a time as that was , being in that season of the yeere that was fittest for it . In this manner they were brought along , till at last they landed ; and being now come into the city , they tooke their leaues : euery one betaking himselfe to his owne home , and his owne bed , saue onely my fathers contemplatiue pate , whose rouing head was so full of fancies , that it could take no rest . My mother too , ( like another Melisendra ) full of musing and thoughtfull loue , slept with her bedfellow , her old Consort ; her body beeing prisoner in Sansuenna , and her soule a slaue in Paris ; her corps in one place , and her mind in another .

From that day forwards , such a strong knot of friendship was there knit Guzmans fathers craftie condition . betweene them , and continued with so much discretion and good cunning , ( considering their ouer-venturousnesse , and the danger they might run into ) as could possibly be presumed from the quaint wit , and close conueyance of an Easterling , dyed into a Genouese , and dipt in the Vat of Vsury , who knew well inough , how to put out his money to the best profit ; who could cleare you any account , could liquidate and diuide you to an haire , how much losse there was in measure , from the wastings that arose from the winnowing , and cleansing of corne ; how many graines lost in the refining of such a proportion or quantity of Metall ; nay , she could tell you to a crumme , how much losse there was in an hundred doozen , betweene the bread that was broken with the hand , and that which was cut with the knife . As likewise from a woman The disposi●…on of Guzmans mother . of that good talent , and those gifts and conditions , which I haue heretofore acquainted you withall , it is inough ( if I say no more ) that she was an Andaluz , borne in the towne of Seuill , and bred vp in that good schoole , where she prooued so good a proficient , that shee ranne thorow the whole course of her Art , and did all her Exercise for her Degree of a Whore ; which she had laudably taken , by making her appointments betweene the two Quires , and the Naves , or Isles of the old Church . Now my mother had her fits and flings before this time ; this was not her first flying out , insomuch , that not hauing any thing of her owne in her owne hands , that was woorth the keeping , that very day that she compounded with this old Knight for her company , and had driuen her bargaine with him , she swore vnto me , that she put ouer in trust aboue 3000. Ducats , onely in Iewels of gold and Plate , besides the moueables of her house , and her change of apparell for the setting foorth of her person .

The time ( we see ) weares away , and we must weare with it : that runnes from vs , and we must follow after it . Euery day that opens , discouers new things ; and with the rising of the morning , arise new alterations . And let vs labour , and do all that we can , we may not be excused , nor can the flower of our youth escape in its due time the cutting Sythe of Death . For there is not the shortest moment that passes , that doth not shorten somewhat of our life . And the older still we grow , the neerer we are to our graue . The good old Knight ( as formerly you haue heard ) was an ancient man , and of a feeble An old man , ●…nfit for a young woman . body : my mother , young , faire , and full of wit , and knew so well how to prouoke his appetite vpon all occasions , that his disorder opened the doore to his death ; for the old Lad , by ouer-doing himselfe , hastened his owne end . First , his stomacke began to faile him , then was he taken with a paine in his head , after that followed a burning Feuer , which after some few fits began to leaue him ; but though that ceased , he had neuer awhit the more mind to his meate , he could eate nothing : so by little and little hee consumed away , and after some few puls , he died . My mother not being able to restore him to life , though she would euer sweare vnto him , that she was his life , and he hers : But all that protestation proued to be but a lie ; for he was buried , yet she still liued .

The old Knight left many kinsmen behind him in the house , when he dyed , but none of them of the same sute with my selfe , though they colour'd for it ; onely my mother and I sorted well together : as for the rest , they were p●…n de diezmo , cada vno de la suya : like the bread , that the people offer vp to the Priest ; euery one with a different deuice , or contrary marke , that his loafe may be knowne from others . That good old Gentleman , ( God be with him , The actions of Guzmans mother . and haue mercy on his soule ) had but little comfort in this life ; and at the time of his death , they on the one side , my mother on the other , while the breath was yet in his body , pull'd the linnen from vnder him , leauing him a soule in his body , but not a sheet in his bed : so that the sacking of Antwerpe ( which for the cruelty thereof is growne into a Prouerbe ) compared with this , was not halfe so rigorous , nor halfe so inhumane as this : and all ( forsooth ) for feare of a Sequestration to haue the goods deposited . But my mother , as she churned the milke , so she was her owne caruer ; she was the Taylor to cut out her owne coat , and the worker of her owne fortune . Shee found a time not long after to put her hands there , where her heart was long before , and fell to fingring of his mony . For she had the chiefest of all his goods in her owne keeping vnder locke and key , and was Mistris of all that was woorth the hauing . But seeing her selfe in danger , and fearing to be put to her iumpes , shee thought it better to steale , then to begge ; and like a thiefe to make a start out of a bush , then hereafter to aske an almes for Gods sake . They were so nimble on all hands , that there was scarce inough left where-withall to bury him .

Some few dayes were scarce ouer-past , but many diligences were vsed , for to make these his goods appeare . They set vp Excommunications at the Churches , and vpon mens doores , to try if that would do any good , and make the purloyners to bring in the goods : but all to small purpose ; for hee that steales , seldome returnes to make restitution . But my mother made her excuse , saying ; That the Knight ( God be with him ) would still tell her , when he came to visit his moneys , and ran ouer his Coffers and his Cabinets , or had brought any thing into the house ; This is thine , ( sweet heart ) it is all for thee . So the Lawyers were of opinion , that with this she might very well satisfie her conscience . Besides , they affirmed , that it was a due debt , and properly belonged vnto her ; for though she gain'd it ill , yet it was not receiued ill . And howbeit the Act were not lawfull , yet the Compact was iustifiable . It was not lawfull for her to play the whore , yet might shee by Law haue whatsoeuer was promised her for the vse of her body .

In this mans death , I found that to be verified , which I had often heard before ; That rich men dye of hunger , poore men of surfets , and those which Rich men dye of hunger . haue no Heyres , and enioy the goods of the Church , of cold : So that this man may serue herein for an Example . For whilest he was yet liuing , they left him not so much as a shirt , saue only that which he wore on his backe , which of courtesie they were content he should carry out of the world with him . Rich men , for feare they should be sicke with eating too much , to auoyd hurt , hurt themselues ; since by eating by ounces , and drinking by thimble-fuls , they liue by drams ; dying rather out of hunger , then their disease . Poore men , Poore men dye with ouer-eating themselues . in that they are poore , euery man takes pitie of them ; one sends , another brings to them , & all of all sorts , and from all parts repaire vnto them , to giue them reliefe , especially when they are in that extremity . And when they find themselues leane and hunger-staru'd , they make no good choyce of their feeding , for want of some discreet bodie that should administer vnto them , and order them in their dyet : whereupon they eate so much , and glut themselues so full , that they cannot digest their meat for want of naturall heat , and so choaking themselues with ouer-gorging their pannels , they meerely die surfeited .

The like happeneth likewise in your Hospitals , where some deuout fooles , tender-hearted women , who go thither to visit them out of meere deuotion , stuffe their pockets and their sleeues full of banquetting-stuffe to carry along with them , sending their seruants laden with baskets of regalo's , and delicate choice Dainties . And thinking therein to do an almes-deed , out of them charity , they kill them for Gods-sake . In my opinion , this ought not to be suffered , but this cost should rather be bestowed vpon the sicknesse , then the sick , and be put into their Keepers hands , that are sworne to haue a due care of them : for by that meanes , ( hauing the counsell of some learned Physician ) these things shall be better distributed in their proper place , and make more for their good : And to doe otherwise , may proue hurtfull and dangerous . And in this their ill-dispensed charity , not weighing the good , nor the hurt ; the season , nor the sicknesse ; whether it be fitting , or not fitting , they cramme their crawes , like so many Capons in a Coope , till they can swallow no more , and so die of the throttle . Hencefoorth therefore , let it be ordained , that such things as these , be giuen to those which minister vnto them , who know better how to dispose of them , or let it be giuen in money , for to supply other their greater wants and necessities .

O what a gentle disparate , what a pretty absurdity is this of mine , yet well grounded in Diuinity ? how am I leapt from the Oare to the Helme ? What A remo , ad clauum & gubernaculum Nauis : A Metaphor from Galley-slaues . a Saint Iohn the Euangelist am I become on the sudden , that I reade you such a Lecture ? The Ouen grew hot , my zeale was kindled , and so these good flashes flew foorth ; you may the better pardon this fault in me , because I haue made you some amends in being so short . As it came in my fingers , I tooke it along with me ; it came in my way , and I could not let it slippe : so shall I doe hereafter , as often as occasion is offered . And looke not thou on him that saves it , but to that which is said vnto thee . For if thou be clad in a neat Suit of clothes , and that they sit well vpon thee , it is not materiall , whether thy Taylour were crooke-back't , or no : that is not a thing to be thought on . And thus much by way of preuention , that thou mayest either leaue mee to my selfe , or arme thy selfe with patience . I wot well , that it is impossible to bee well receiued of all ; for there is not that Vessell in the world , that can measure mens tastes ; nor that Balance , that can equall their likings , or giue an euen poyze to such vneuen humours . Euery one is in loue with his owne : and thinking his owne iudgement to be the best , is thereby the more deceiued : For the most of men haue it , for the most part , most depraued .

But I returne to my first station , whence I haue digressed : for my mother lookes for me , now being the widow of him that first possessed her ; and dearely beloued , and wonderfully much made of by this second Owner . In this change and alteration of things , betweene these and those other nuptials , Guzman had two fathers , by vertue of his mother . I was betweene three and foure yeeres old : and by the reckenings and rules of your feminine knowledge , I had two fathers : for my mother was so well learned in her Art , that she knew very well how to father me on them both . She had attained to the knowedge of working impossibilities , as plainely was to be seene , since she had the cunning to serue two Masters , and to please two husbands ; to both of them giuing good contentment . Both of them did acknowledge me to be their sonne ; the one sayd , I was his ; so did the other . And when the Knight was alone by himselfe , my mother would tell him , that I was as like him , as if I had beene spit out ● of his mouth ; and that two Egges were not liker one another , then I was like him . When againe , shee talked a As they say , cl gato es estornudo del ●…on , as like 〈◊〉 , as 〈◊〉〈◊〉 had beene sp●…t out of his m●… , or ●…z 〈◊〉 of ●…is n●…se , f●…r his fa●… , 〈◊〉 and 〈◊〉〈◊〉 . with my father , she would tell him , that I was his alter ego , that he and I were one , and so would haue seemed , if our heads had beene cut off , and layd in a Charger : and that I was himselfe , made lesse ; and did so truly resemble him , as if my head had stood vpon his shoulders . But I wonder a God , in this resemblance of mine , ( which a blind man might discerne at the first blush ) that the mystery thereof was not discouered ; that they found not out her craft , and searched not out the secret of this her deceit . But what with the blindnesse where-withall they lou'd her , and the confidence which each of them had , it was not perceiued , nor any the least suspition made thereof And so both their beliefes were good , and both made exceeding much of me : the difference onely was , that in the time the good old man liu'd , hee was my true father in publicke , and the stranger in secret . And so my mother certified me afterwards , making large relations of these things vnto me .

And therefore I protest , howsoeuer men may talke , and seeke to slander me , that it doth no whit preiudice me ; I heard it from her owne mouth , and barely relate vnto you what she told me . For it were great indiscretion and vnaduisednesse in me , to affirme , which of these two did beget mee , or whether I were the sonne of a third . Let her excuse me in this , who brought me foorth : for it ill becommeth any man to lye , much lesse to write an vntruth : nor would I that men should say , that I maintaine Paradoxes . But that woman , that professes to loue two , deceiueth both the one and the other , and there is no trust to be had to her . This is to be vnderstood of a single woman ; for the rule in those that are married is otherwise . It is an old saying , That two is one ; one , none ; and three , Roguery . For a woman , making no reckoning of her husband , ( and this is true which I speake ) he being alone , is none ; and he , with another , makes one ; and with those other two , which are three in the whole , make vp iust as much , as those two to a single-woman . So that according to their reason , the reckoning is already made . But be it as it may be , and grant that this Easterling , this Iew , or this Moore be my father ; for since that they haue said it , and euery one doth auerre it to be true , it is not fit that I should appeale , all parties being agreed . I call my selfe his sonne , and so I take my selfe to be : since that from that a a Agreeing with that phrase which we vse to latle children , when we tell them they were borne in their mothers Parsly-bed . Mellon-bed I was made legitimate by the holy right of Matrimony . And it is much better for me this way , then that people should say , that I am ill borne , and the sonne of no man .

My father did loue vs both with that true loue , as his actions shall sufficiently declare . For by the force of this his loue , he did tread vnder-foot the idolatry of that , which men style by the name of popular Voyce , and common Opinion . For they knew no other name that she had , saue the b b By reason the old Knight held some Church-liuing in Commendum . Commendadora ; and to that would she answere , as if she had had some Commendum conferred vpon her . But he not regarding any of these things , nor making any reckoning of the one or the other , setting as light by them , as the least hayre of his head , kept company with her , and in the end tooke her to wife . I would haue thee likewise to vnderstand , that he did not enter vpon this businesse , a humo de pajas , suddenly and vnaduisedly , without hauing first well bethought himselfe of what he did . Euery man knowes his owne estate best ; And a foole vnderstands more in his owne , then a wise man in another mans house .

In this Intermedium , albeit this his Quinta or Garden-house , which hee had purchased , was a place of pleasure and delight , yet it was his vndoing , it was his ouerthrow : The profit little , and losse much ; the cost great , as well for the keeping of it neat and handsome , as for the feastings and banquetings For poore men to keepe places for pleasi●…e , is their ruine . which were very frequent . Such kind of delicacies as these , and such places for recreations , are onely fit for those , that haue other large possessions , good sure Lands , great and certaine Rents , which may quit the cost , and make the loade seeme the lighter . But for those that are not well lin'd , that haue not a strong and able purse , and that haue not the world at will , these niceties , are that Moth that eateth on , till it fretteth out and consumeth the heart : it is that Worme in Wood ; that Magot in the Nut , which turnes all into dust and rottennesse : it is Hemlocke in a cup of Ambar ; and poyson in a golden Vessell .

And thus much by the way concerning that point ; it is but a touch ; and now we go on . What with suites in Law , what with making loue to my mother , and other expences , one charge drawing on another , a great part of my fathers state was consumed , all was almost gone , he was vpon the point of breaking , and ready to turne a a Estallido : Is the noise which a thing makes when it cleaues , or rends in sunder . Metaphoricè . A Bankerout . How Guzmans Mother got her wealth which his father had with her . Bankerupt , as he had often done before ; so that it would haue beene no strange or new thing vnto him .

My Mother was a storer , a thrifty Wench , one that could hold her owne ; she was no waster , but lay still on the sauing hand : what with that which she gained in her youth-fuller dayes , and what she had scraped vp in the Knights life-time , as likewise at his death , amounted almost to ten thousand Ducats , this was her Dowry , and so much had he with her .

This money did somewhat refresh his drooping estate , it made him hold vp his head againe , who before was vpon fainting , and ready to swoune : it was vnto him like a piece of Weeke or Cotton in a Lampe , dipt in Oyle ; hee began to giue light a-fresh ; he spent brauely , got him a Caroche , and a Silla de manos , a little chaire to carry with hands , borne with girthes vpon mens Ill gotten goods what became of them ? shoulders , as well for ease , as state . Not so much for any longing that my mother had thereunto , as for his owne ostentation and glory , that the world might not take notice of the weakenesse of his Estate , or that he was going downe the winde . In this kinde of fashion did he liue to vphold his credit , and rubb'd out as well as he might with his meanes ; but his gaines did not equal his expences . There was but one to get , & many to spend ; but one paire of hands , and a great many mouthes . The Times were hard ; the yeeres deare ; dealings , small and bad ; little , or no Trading . What was well gotten , is wasted and gone ; and what was ill gotten , hath not onely consumed it selfe , but his owner too . So that at last , all was brought to nothing : Sinne , brought it in ; and Sinne ( on my conscience ) sent it packing . For of all that was left , nothing appeared . The light was now quite out , and my father beeing taken The death of Guzmans Father . with a grieuous sicknesse , was arrested by Death within fiue dayes after : and so shut vp his shop-windowes , and departed this world .

Now , for that I was a child , and of small vnderstanding , I did not feele the want of a Father , nor found any great misse of him when he dyed , though I was then at that time a doozen yeere old , and better . And notwithstanding that we grew poore , the house was still well furnished with houshold-stuffe , whereof we tooke now a piece , and then a piece , and sold it away by parcels for to buy vs bread , and wherewith to eate . But the wealth of those , that The property of the wealth of rich men reduced to pouerty . haue beene rich , hath this property , that the remainder of their estate is alwayes more , then the best estate of those that be poore ; & dayly more & more they leaue some prints , which discouer , like the ruines of Rome , what it was .

My mother grieued much , for that she had lost a good and honest Husband , and found her selfe , not onely robbed of him , but also of her wealth , and growne now so aged , that she was super-annuated for any more Suitors , so that she could not help her selfe with her good parts ; nor recouer her former credit . And albeit her beauty was not disfigured , yet her yeeres had somewhat defaced it : And it grieued her exceedingly , that hauing beene so many times sued vnto by many , that she was not now in case to be courted : And especially of some such person , whose fethers she might haue pull'd from him ; for otherwise , neither would she haue yeelded vnto him , nor I haue permitted it . Euen in this also was I vnhappy , since that in-come which my Mother got ( as Cats doe ) by her tayle , did then cease , when I had most need of it . I said amisse , when I said it ceased : For she was yet fit for action ; and would ( when she was so disposed ) put on her dressings , and weare her head attire , as being little more then forty yeeres old . I haue knowne since some old Maids ( pussocks in comparison of her ) of greater yeeres , and lesse handsomnesse , that would call themselues by the name of young Girles , and little pretty Maidens , and sweare ( if you would beleeue them when they lye ) that they came but yesterday out of their swaddling cloathes : And although my Mother did not shew so faire for it , she thought her penny good siluer , and would not giue her arme for the wringing , or her head for the washing . And shee would rather die and starue for hunger , then bate an Ace of her former height , or faile one quilate in the touch and finenesse of her punctualitie .

You now see me heere left without a father , either the one or the other , our goods wasted , and that which is worst of all , bearing a high sayle , liuing at a great rate , without any person in it to gaine a penny , to maintaine this port . On my fathers side , a a Cid , was the brauest & valiantest Souldier in his time , and had conquered fiue Kings of the M●…ores , and made them pay tribute . Guzmans linage . Cid did not goe beyond me , he was no better a man than my selfe ; for my possession crossed and diuided that Lordship . On my mothers side , I was as well descended ; my great grand-fathers being men of great wealth , and of good esteeme in their Country . I had more grafts , then the b b In Toledo , they tearme Gigarrales , certaine possessions , not fa●…e from Toledo , which are little choise garden plots , full of Fountaines , as also Fruit trees , Vines , Oliues , and Figges , with a little house of pleasure to entertaine the Owner . But some of your Cigarrales are goodly things of great both value , and recreation ; but of as much expence , as profit . Father Guadix sayes , that it is an Arabique word ; and signifies as much as a little House . A notable vanity . Cigarrales of Toledo , ( for by that name are those Gardens of pleasure thereabouts called ) as I learned afterwards . I tell you ( as a thing publiquely knowne to all the world ) that my mother was her mothers owne daughter , and trode iust in her steps , she set her Samplar before her , that she might draw out some good worke from thence , so that shee went along in the very same path that she did , saue only in that of their child-bearing ; for my grandmother brought forth a daughter for her comfort , and my father begot a sonne for my mothers ruine . If my Mother brought two into the net , my Grandmother brought two doozen , and made them like Chickens ( if the world speakes truth ) to eate together in one pot-sheard , and to sleepe in one Hen-roost , and to be pen'd vp in one Coope , without pecking one at another , or driuen to hood them , as they doe Hawkes .

With this daughter of hers , ( I meane my Mother ) she insnared a hundred seuerall persons , vowing and protesting to euery supposed father , that my Mother was his child , and so to all , that she was like them all : To such a one , in her eye ; to another , in her mouth ; to a third , in most of the parts and lineament of her body : nay , to colour the busines the better , she would go a little farther , in counterfetting markes and moles in the face , and other spots in other parts to that purpose ; not wanting to tell some , that she did spit like them , and that she had it naturally from them . She had this ( as she was excellent in many ) cunning tricke with her , that when any of her sweet-hearts were present with her , she would call her after his Sir-name . And if two , or more were there at the same time , she call'd her barely by her owne name , without any addition . Her proper name was Marcella , which was burnished and furbished ouer with the title of Don set ouer the head of it ; for as she was called Donna Marcella ; so had she her Don or Cauallero for her seruant . For Donna , without a Don , are lesse compatible , and lesse comely , then a house without a bed ; a Mill , without a Wheele ; or a body , without a shadow . As for her sir-names , being they were things that meerely depended vpon her mothers owne free choise and election ; and for that she was vncertaine thereof , because she could not well tell who was the true father to her daughter : I must therefore giue you to know , that she did bolster her vp , and vnder-prop her , with the best titulary names she could deuise , throwing more noble houses vpon her , then a King of Armes could conferre with all his farre-fetcht Pedigrees . Which to repeat vnto you , were to reckon vp a Bead-roll of Genealogies , as long as any Letany , that is solemnly sung at diuine seruice .

The Guzmans were those , vnto whom she most inclined , ( for she had a great liking to that name ) and my Mother told me in secret , that in her opinion , which was no more then her owne conscience did tell her : in discharge whereof , she did verily beleeue , and was fully perswaded ( by some likely incounters , probable ghesses , and other circumstances of time and place iumping and concurring together ) that she was some by-blow of a Cauallero , that was neere of kinne to the Dukes of Medina Sidonia . My Grandmother was a wise woman , a crafty old Dame , and neuer wanted to her dying day , but had wherewithall to spend freely , nor was it any wonder ; for when it began to wax night with her , and that it was time for her to shut vp her shop , then did my Mothers dawning of the day begin to appeare , and she had her at her elbow , to continue the trade for her , and the first bargaine that she droue , was worth to her betterthen 4000. ducats , which shee had of a rich Merchant , ( with whom she held trafficke , and exchanged wares ) that was newly come from Peru , who did deliuer her the money by basket-fuls , which was good and quick payment . She neuer made bad voyage , she still bore vp , liu'd in plenty , and would not lose a iot of what was her due . No Christian could carry away her right from her ; nor would she giue any first fruits to the Diuell .

Now , if we had had the like goodlucke , our misery might haue beene the lesse : Or if , as I was the onely sonne of my Mother , it had been my good hap to haue had a Sister , to haue seru'd as a prop to my Mother , as a Staffe to her old Age , as a Pillar to our Pouerty , and as a Port to our often shipwracks , we would haue bid a figge in Fortunes teeth .

Seuill stood very fitly and commodiously seated for point of profit , or for Seuill , and its condition . any kinde of incroaching-getting , and as much is brought thither to be sold , as there is to be bought . For there shall you meete with Merchants that will deale with you in all commodities , no wares come amisse . It is Patria communis , and a free-common for all commers ; it is a pasture , without inclosure ; a Gordian Knot , an open field , a Globe without end , a mother of Orphans , and a shelter for Sinners ; where all cry out of want , and yet no man wants . Or ( since not this ) that I had been bred vp in Court , which is the Sea , that swallowes all ; the point , wherein all lines meet , and the very center , wherevnto all other parts haue recourse : sure my abilities would not haue beene lesse then other mens ; and as I should haue wanted no good parts , so should I not haue lackt entertainment . I should haue lighted on some good Office or other , got to be in Commission , and other the like places of profit and honour , wherein I should haue gone as farre as another , and haue found as much fauour , had my purse been as good : For that will hold any thing fast , and is the onely thing to keepe a man in . And had the worst come to the worst , yet could we not haue wanted meat and drinke , but should haue far'd like Kings . For he that shall haue a good piece of land , or the like pledge , either to impawne , or to sell , shall euer haue a chapman ready at hand , either to buy it out-right , or to lend so much money vpon it , as to serue a mans present occasions . But I was an vnfortunate man , ( as you haue already heard ) and stood alone by my selfe , without any tree by me , either to shadow , or to shelter me . I had many troubles come vpon me , the burthen was heauy , my strength weake , my debt great , and my meanes small . See then and consider whether it were fit or no , that such a young Youth as I , that began to crowe before I was scarce out of the shell , and to write man so soone , hauing such honest parts in me , and good indowments , should not bee made some reckoning off ? The best help that I had , was to try my fortune , by leauing my Mother , and my Country , to see if I could mend my miserable Estate . I did so , and because I would not bee knowne , I would not make vse of my Fathers name : but that of Guzman , which I tooke from my Mother , and of Whence Alfarache●…ad ●…ad his name . Alfarache , which was the place of my inheritance , as also of my beeing . With this resolution , I went abroad to see the World , trauelling from place to place , re-commending my selfe to God , and well-disposed people , in whom I had put my trust .

CHAP. III.

How Guzman departed from his Mothers house vpon a Friday towards the Euening , discouering by the way the torments of hunger , and that which befell him with his Hostesse , recounting many notable examples of some Rules of ill gouernment .

I Was a fat plumpe Lad , well fed , and cockerd vp , bred in Seuill , neuer checkt , chid , nor corrected by my Father : My The delicacie wherem Guzman liued . Mother ( as you haue heard ) a Widdow-woman , my selfe cram'd with Collops of Bacon , your finest Bread , and your daintiest Creame ; your sops of Honey steep'd in Rose-water , more lookt on and adored , then a Merchant of Toledo , or at least as good a man as he , it grieued me very much ( besides that the loue of a mans Country is sweet and deare vnto him ) to forgoe thus my house , my kinsfolke and my friends . But being forced thereunto , I could not auoid it . The desire that I had to see the world , and to goe into Italy to take acquaintance of my Noble Kindred and Alliance , did much quicken and put life into me .

I set forth , which I ought not to haue done ( I may be bold to say it ) late , and vnluckily . And thinking to meet with some rich remedy , I lost all that Guzman departs from Seuill to se●… the world ; and what hapned vnto him the first night . little that I had . That hapned vnto me , which befell the Dogge in the Fable with the shadow of his piece of flesh in the water .

I had scarce gone out of the Citie gate , when ( without being able to make resistance ) two great Riuers ( like an ouer-flowing Nilus ) did breake out from forth mine eyes , watring my face in great aboundance , till it was bathed all ouer with teares . What with this , and the nights comming on ( for it grew darke ) I could not discerne any light of heauen ; nor perceiue so much as a hands-breadth of earth as I went along . When I came to San Lazaro , ( which is but a little way off from the Citie , I sate me downe there vpon the stayres or steps , by which we goe vp to that holy Hermitage . There I made a new muster of my life , suruay'd it ouer and ouer , and discoursed with my selfe thereupon . I was about to goe backe againe , for that I came forth ill prouided , worse aduised , and poorely furnisht with money for so long a Voyage , hauing scarce sufficient to serue my turne for a farre shorter ●…ourney . And amongst other my so many misfortunes , ( which when they once beginne , Misfortunes seldome come alone . come by clusters , hanging like Cherries , one at the tayle of another ) it was Friday night ; and withall , somewhat darke . I had neither supt , nor had any beuer that afternoone . Had I gone out of the Citie vpon a flesh day , although I had beene borne blind , my nose would haue helped mee to smell out some one Cookes shoppe or other , where I might haue bought a penny Pasty , wherewithall to entertaine my stomake , and to dry vp my teares , and so my sorrow would haue beene the lesse .

Then I began to perceiue , how much more sensible a man is of the good he loseth then when he inioyed it ; and what difference there is betweene the He that hath not wherewithall to eate , ●…ath store of sorrowes . hungry belly , and the full-fed paunch . All troubles passe the better with bread : Where good feeding fayleth , there no good followeth ; no euill which aboundeth not ; no pleasure that indureth , nor content to comfort vs . All fret and chafe , and know not why , nor wherefore . No man is in fault ; and yet they lay it one vpon another ; all runne vpon the haunt , feigning strange Chimera's in their heads ; all is then nothing but gouernment ; all is Philosophy . I had a great minde to my supper , but the diuell a bit of any thing that I could get to put to my mouth , saue a little fresh water that ran from a fountaine that was there hard by . I knew not what to doe with my selfe , nor how to cast about , to bring my self into some one Hauen or other . That which did hearten me one way , did discourage me another . I found my selfe betwixt feares and hopes ; a steepe downe-fall before mine eyes , and rauening Wolues ready to deuoure me at my backe . My thoughts began as fast to wauer , as my feet did to wander : at length I was willing to put my selfe into Gods hands . I entred into a Church , I powr'd foorth a short prayer , but whether deuout enough or no , I know not . Nor would they suffer me to dwell any longer on my Orizons ; for the hower was come that they were to rid the Church , and to shut vp the doores .

The night was now shut vp , and with it my imaginations , but not the teares , that trickled from mine eyes : In this melancholy humour I fell at last asleepe vpon a seate without in the Church-porch . I know not what should be the reason of it , vnlesse peraduenture , that sleepe crackes cares , and breaks melancholy in twaine . As that Mountanese gaue vs to vnderstand , whogoing The con●…it of a Mountanese . to bury his Wife , went bare-foot , and bare-legg'd ; his Iacket with its inside outward ; and so in the rest , all was Kim-kam , I know not how . In that mountainous Country the houses stand apart , and some of them very farre from the Church . And passing by a Tauerne , he perceiued white-Wine was there to be sold : whereupon he made as if he had some other necessary businesse to do , and sayd vnto them ; On a Gods name , keepe on afore , my masters , with this vnfortunate Coarse , for I shall ouer-take you in a trice : So hee slunke backe , and went into the Tauerne ; where taking cuppe after cuppe , he soop't so long , till he was starke drunke , and there fell asleepe . Now when those of his company came from the Buriall , and found him stretcht out vpon the floore , they called alowd vnto him ; he after awhile being come againe to himselfe , looking somewhat heauily vpon them , sayd ; Now a pockes of all ill lucke : pardon mee , ( my masters ) I pray , pardon mee ; for , I sweare vnto you , that there is not any thing in the world , that causeth more thirst , or more sleepe , then sorrow . It was iust euen so with me ; for it was now Saturday morning , and the Sunne was some two houres high , when I began to bethinke my selfe what I had beene doing ; nor should I haue wak't so soone , if the Timbrels , and the Songs , and the Dancings of certaine Women , which came thither that day to keepe their Wake , and to feast , and be merry , with their dubbing , and their bawling , had not rowz'd me vp from sleepe . I got me vp , ( though somewhat of the latest ) hungry , and drowsie , without knowing for a while where I was ; so that me thought I was still as it were in a dreame . But when at last I was fully awake , and found all was true that I or saw , or heard , I said to my selfe ; Echada esta la suerte , the Dye is throwne , God send me good lucke . And with this resolution , I went forward on my iourney ; but the diuell awhit did I know whither I did go , nor indeed did I much stand vpon it ; for all was one to me . At last , I tooke that way , which offered it selfe fairest to mine eye ; let it lead whither it would , I did not care . What ●…ses and Common-wealths are ill gouerned . Which did then put me in mind of those ill-gouerned both houses and Common-wealths , where the feet performe the heads office . Where reason and vnderstanding doe not dispatch businesses ; where they haue not the command , it is to melt a mans gold , ( come of it what may come ) and afterwards to adore a calfe . My feet carried me along ; I followed as fast after them ; come good , or come ill ; ouer hill and dale trudge I. That happening vnto mee , which befell a foolish Physician in Mancha ; who had no learning in the A ●…le of an ignorant Phis●… . world , neuer studied any Physicall Author ; but had gotten together ( which he carried along with him ) a great number of Receipts ; some for Syrrupes , and some for Purges , which were distributed into seuerall , either Boxes , or Vyols .

Now this cunning Leech , when he visited any sicke-body , ( and look't to be well payed for his paines , for the good he should do him ) he would thrust his hand into his Satchell , ( which he still bare about with him for these purposes ) and then would he take foorth one of his recipe's , saying first to himselfe , God dispose it to good . And so he gaue the Patient that which came first to hand , without any more ado ; worke how it would worke , that was all one to him ; he would put that still to the venture . In letting of blood , he kept no account either for the Veine , or the quantitie ; but would cry , either a little more , or a little lesse , as he chanced to blurt the word at all aduenture out of his mouth , casting himselfe vpon Fortune , rushing thorow thicke and thinne ; like him that carelesly runnes thorow a Corne-field , where some Eares are trod vnder-foot , and some scape without harme ; more by chance , then good cunning . I might then haue said to my selfe , as did hee , God dispose it to good ; for I did not know what course I ran ; I was ignorant of my way , nor could I tell , ( if my life should haue lyen vpon it ) whither I was bound .

But because his diuine Maiestie sendeth troubles , according to his owne good will and pleasure , and for such ends , as are best knowne to himselfe , they Afflictions are sent vs by God for our good . turne all to our greater good , if we can haue the grace to make true vse of them . They began now to come fast vpon me , and followed me at an inch , not allowing me one moment of content , nor affoording mee so much as a breathing-time from my cares , all the while that I was abroad in my trauels : so that they neuer left , whither-soeuer I went . But these were not those , that were sent me of God ; but onely those which my selfe went seeking after . And there is a great deale of difference betweene the one , and the other : for those that come from the hand of God , he knowes how to free vs from Troubles sent from God , are Iewels : them ; and such as these , are Mynes of most pure gold , most precious Iewels , couered with a little Sward , or light Turfe of earth , which with a little labour may be discouered and found . But those , which men draw vpon themselues by their vices and sensuall delights , are gilded Pilles , which deceiuing But drawne on by our selues , are torments vnto vs . the sight with a false show of a sauourie taste , put the body out of order , if not vtterly ouerthrow it . They are greene fields , full of venimous Vipers ; stones ( at the first sight ) of great esteeme , but vnderneath are full of Scorpions : and lastly , an eternall death , which deludeth vs with a short life .

This day hauing wearied out my selfe with going onely but two little Leagues , ( which were the first that euer I went ) it seemed vnto me , that I had arriued at the Antipodes , and like another famous Columbus , that I had discouered a new World . Well , I came at length to an Inne , full of sweate and dust ; my feet surbated , my selfe sad , and aboue all , with my Mill in very good state to grind , my teeth sharpe , and my stomacke faint . It was about Noone , I ask't what we might haue to dinner : they told me , That they had nothing but egges ; it had not beene amisse if they had beene egges : for either The roguery of an Hostesse . whether the roguish Hostesse , through too much heat , clocking ouer them , or that the Foxe had kill'd the Hen , some were growne addle , others ready to hatch ; and that she might not lose by them , shee had put them in a boxe , and had mingled them with other egges that were good . But shee did not deale so ill with me , God reward her according to her vsage of me : shee saw I was a young Lad , ruddy-cheek't , full-fac't , and plumpe withall ; that I was a nouice in the world , and look't like a good honest simple Youth , and that any thing would serue me well inough : vpon this she ask't me ; My pretty child , whence are you ? I told her , I was of Seuill : with that , she came neerer vnto me , and giuing me a chocke vnder the chin , she said vnto me ; Now you little wanton foole , whither wander you ? O good God , how did her stinking breath annoy me ! with her very touching of me , me thought I had drawne old-age vpon me , the attraction was so sensible to my seeming . This made me imagine , that the vtmost of euils had now lighted vpon me , in meeting with such a filthy vnsauoury Slut. And if my stomacke had beene full at that time , as it was empty , I should haue spued out all within me ; for my stomacke then rose vp to my mouth , and my guts had almost kist my lippes . I told her , that I was going to the Court , and wisht her to giue me somwhat for my dinner . Then she made me sit downe vpon a lame Bench , and on the top of a little blocke , she spred a Dish-clout before me , iust for all the world , like vnto the Maulkins wherewith she swept her Ouen ; and this ( forsooth ) was my Table-cloth : my Salt-sellar , was the foot of an old broken Pitcher , or some piece of a pot-sheard , such as she sets full of water , to make her Poultry drinke : and halfe a Loafe of bread , that was blacker then her Napery . This preparation made , she presently powr'd me foorth vpon a plate a Froize of egges , which might more truly haue beene tearmed a Plaister of egges : they , the bread , the Iarre , the water , the Salt-sellar , the salt , the linnen , and the Hostesse , were all one ; so well did they suit together . I knew my selfe to be a young traueller , and therefore held it discretion to make no reply , but to take all patiently ; my tongue was tyed , my mouth muzzled , my stomacke empty my guts shrunke , and clung so close together , as if they had beene newly milched . I was as sharpe set vpon my Froize , as a Hog is after Akornes , and slopt vp my egges , as a Sow do's Wash , I was so eager vpon the businesse . I made no bones of it , all went cleane vp together without any great chewing ▪ howbeit , to speake the truth , I felt the tender bones of those vntimely Chickens to crackle betweene my teeth , that they made my gummes to tickle againe . I must tel you truly , that me thought , ( besides the ill-fauourednes of the taste , which was not like that of other egges , which I vs'd to eate at home in my mothers house ) this was but a coorse kind ofvsage ; and such as I had not here-tofore beene acquainted with . But I did let that conceit passe by , and drown'd the imagination thereof in my hunger and wearinesse ; conceiting with my selfe , that the distance of place , or difference of the Climate , might be the cause thereof , and that all egges were not of one sauour , nor of one quality . In conclusion , I digested all things so well , that I tooke it for a token of good lucke . For it is as proper to him that is hungry , not to stand vpon Sauces , and your fine relishes ; as to him that is in want , to step out into the high He that is truly hungry , will not sticke to eate any thing . way , and to take a purse . No booty comes amisse to him that is in need . Beg , steale , or any thing , rather then starue .

I made light of it , my dinner was short , and as quickly dispatch't , and took in good part this my first course , though it could not well be courser . Vpon my bread I dwelt somewhat longer ; I fell to that a little more leysurely , pawsing now and then betwixt euery bit ; for it being likewise very bad , I was forced to take longer time ; one morsell making way for another , that it might the more orderly descend downe into my stomacke . I began with the crust , and ended in the crumme , which was as tough as Whit-lether , and as dry as a Paste-boord . But whatsoeuer it were , were it better or worse , I deuoured euery iot of it ; nor did leaue out of courtesie , the least crumme thereoffor the Ants to feed vpon , no more then if it had beene little , and good . That happening vnto me , which doth befall good feeders , when they fall close to a dish of fruit ; who picking out first the best and the ripest , do ( as in the eating of Cherries ) eate vp the greenest and worst last , without once thinking of those that were gone before . Then did I eat apace , one bit ( as they say ) driuing down another , till I had made an end of halfe a Loafe : which , if it had beene good , or but any thing reasonable , or that it had but pleased my eye , ( for it was but poore browne-bread ) I would haue taken in a greater crop , and haue filled vp my pann●…ll , with a whole Loafe of at least three pound weight . The yeere was barren by reason of the great droughts ; and in such times as those , Seuill was wont to suffer much scarcitie ; for euen in their better , and more plentifull yeeres , they haue had much ado to rub out : what hope can there then be , when corne is scant with them ?

But it is not fit , that I should inlarge my selfe in this subiect , nor open the mysterie thereof vnto you , by giuing you a reason for it . I am a sonne of that Citie , a Towne-borne child : I will therefore hold my peace ; for all the whole World is one and the same , here and there , and euery where , all alike . For no man buyes an a a Or a Monopoly ▪ Aga●…st the ●…l Gouernours and Magistrates of Seuill . Office for any other end and purpose , but for his profit , be it publike , or be it priuate ; they will grate and scrape , be it by hooke or by crooke , to raise a fortune there-out vnto themselues . Few are they , that will part with so many thousand Ducats , for to do good vnto the poore , but to themselues . For ere they will bestow a farthing-token on a poore body by way ofalmes , they will first examine the businesse , and consult with themselues , whether it be a charitable act or no.

Thus it fared with a Regidor , who being espied by an old man , one of that Towne where he had to doe , to exceed the bounds of his duty , and to doe things beyond his Commission , call'd him vnto him , and told him ; How now Sinior N , &c. Is this it , that you were sworne vnto , when you were admitted at the Assembly , to be one of our Company , that you should goe about to picke vp your crummes a this fashion , and trot vp and downe to sharke for these b b The conceit of this passage , co●…sists in the word Menudos , and its double significat●…on . For Menudo's are brasse Moneys : they signifie also particular necessities . Menudo is likewise the intrailes of a sheep , together with the head and feet : and in birds , the garbage . And these are vsually eaten in Spaine vpon Saturday , but no other part of the carkase . This last signification sorts best . Menudo's ? To whom he made this answer ; Doe not you see , how I comply with mine Oath , since I come for them euery Saturday to the Shambles ? I bought them with my money , and I had them out of the poore sheepes belly . After this manner all things passe , in all places ; it is the world . They go diuiding the spoile among themselues ; they will fetch flowre from all parts to make themselues a good Cake . Claw me , claw thee : to day for me , tomorrow for thee : doe thou giue me leaue to buy , and I will giue thee leaue to sell. They make restraints for selling of Victuals , saue onely at such set times and places : they set the prices vpon all things , as if they were their owne : and when they please they will sell the same againe at what rate they thinke fit . For all is theirs , as well what is bought , as what is sold.

Myselfe am a Witnesse , that a Regidor of one of the chiefest Cities of Andaluzia , and Kingdome of Granada , had a flock of sheepe , an herd of Goates , and some other milch-beasts ; and for that the weather was cold , he could by no meanes vtter his milke , but euery man fell to his c c Bunnuelo , is a certaine round Fritter compos'd of Meale , Oyle , and Hony : and is more vs'd in Spaine , then in any other parts , in Winter time . It is called Bunnuelo , quasi Punnuelo , because it is strained or squeazed out of the Fist , and so let fall into the Pan of Oyle . Bunnuelo's . Now thinking with himselfe , that he should lose much thereby , if Lent should grow on , and should not remedy the matter before-hand , hee propounded at an open Meeting , or publicke Assembly , That the Moriscan Bunnulero's , or Frittermakers , did rob the Common-wealth . Hee rated them therefore at a lesser price , then it stood them in , amounting to little more then sixe d d A Marauedis , is a small piece of brasse-money , 32. of them go to sixepence . Marauedis . Well , he was willing in the end to raise them to eight , allowing them rather a small , then moderate gaine .

Hereupon , none would make of them , because they could get nothing by the bargaine . And so in that space or tract of time , he spent the profits of his Cattle , in Butter , Creame , fresh-Cheese , and other such like things , till the time of yeere was come , that he was to put foorth his Flockes and Herds of Cattle into the common fields . And when he began to make his Cheese , then would he raise vp your Bunnuelo's to twelue Marauedis , as they were at before ; but then Summer was comming on , and they shortly to grow out of season . He himselfe did not sticke to report this crafty tricke of his , to teach men how to become good husbands , and how they ought to beate their brains , to make shift to liue .

Now let vs returne againe into our old way , from which we haue digrest : for me thinkes it is not meet , that we should lay all the fault vpon the Magistrates and Gouernours of Townes and Incorporations , being that wee may distribute it as well among others . Let vs throw some of this vpon your Purveyors , The craft of a couetou●… Magistrate . and Commissaries ; and not vpon all neither , but on some of them , as it may be foure out of fiue , or so ; who like Caterpillers destroy the Land , by robbing of poore old Men , and desolate Widdowes , by deceiuing of their betters , and by telling lyes , and informing false-hoods to their King ; the one for to increase their lands and inheritances ; and the other , to haue them confirmed vnto them , that they may settle a good estate vpon the Heires of their house , and haue where-withall to liue in fulnesse , and in plenty .

This likewise is somewhat out of the way from that discourse which I ought heere to treat of , and requires of it selfe a whole and intire booke . I treat in this of mine owne life , and therefore will not meddle with other mens ; but I doe not know , whether I shall be able , when a ball offers it selfe so fairely vnto me , to pull backe my hand or no ? For there is no man that is Master of himselfe , when he is on horsebacke : How much more is a man vnable to containe himselfe , in things so generally knowne ? Both the one and the other is generally imbraced , and all walke the same way , yeelding the field to the stronger , crying out Uiuat , qui vincit , let him liue that conquers ; and he weare gold that wins it . But alas , how do we deceiue our selues ? For we are those that are conquered ; and he that deceiueth , is the deceiued . I say then , that Seuilla per fas , aut per nefas , either by right or by wrong , one way or other , I know not which ( considering her aboundance of fruits , and the dearenesse of them ) suffreth sterrilitie , and scarcitie ; and that yeere was there greater want and penury then heretofore , by reason of some secret disorders , and through the couetousnesse of those , who should haue sought to remedy the matter , who did study onely their owne ends , and to make a particular fortune to themselues . The secret of this mysterie past onely betweene some three or foure of them , many were not acquainted with it , who without considering the ends , tooke in hand bad beginnings , and diuellish meanes , to the hurt of their owne Common-wealth .

In all my trauels , I haue euer obserued , that these great rich men , and powerfull Rich men are like Whales : for they grow great by the hurt of others . persons , are like vnto Whales , who opening wide the mouth & iawes of their couetousnesse , swallow vp all that comes in their way ; to the end that their houses may be well prouided for , and their reuenues increased , without casting any eye of compassion vpon the poore young Orphane ; or lending an eare to the cry of the distressed Damsell ; or affoording his shoulders for to vphold the feeble and the weake ; or opening his charitable hands to relieue the sicke , and him that is in need : but rather vnder the name of good gouernment , euery man so gouernes himselfe , that hee does the best he can , to draw all the water to his owne Mill. They publish good desires ; but they exercise bad actions . Their pretensions are faire ; but their practise starke naught . They would seeme to be Gods Lambes , innocent and harmelesse soules , but the Diuell onely makes profit of them ; they fall wholly to his share ; he , and none but he reapes the fruit of them : God has the name indeede , but the Diuell hath the shearing of them . There was good store of Rye bread , passable inough , and at a reasonable price ; He that had Wheat , reserued the Flowre of the Meale for his own table , and the refuse he brought forth to sell in the Market , as if any thing were good enough for the poore Commons . Our Officers and great men turn'd to be Bakers , and those went about to burne and waste the Country , which should haue rather beene willing to haue been burned for it . I can not deny , but this was punished , and that there were many good men , to whom euill seemed euill . But in such necessities as these , it is not to be holpen by a few . Besides , the great numbers of those that were interessed therein , did crush those , that offered to stirre against them , because they were poore . And if poore , it is inough , I need say no more . Let euery man make his owne coniecture , and discourse that with himselfe .

Perceiuest thou not how impatient I am ? Seest thou not that I can not containe my selfe ? and how that my pen , before euer I thought of lashing out so farre , hath slipt vpon this Theame . They gaue mee the yarke with the spurre , and I turned my head to strike where they pricked me . I know not what excuse to make thee , but to tell thee , that I doe as Carriers doe , that driue their beasts of burthen before them , who rush the man that meetes them against the wall , or throwes him to the ground , and then say , I cry you mercy , Sir . In conclusion , all the bread was nought , although then it did not rellish amisse with mee . I did refresh my selfe with eating , and did cheere vp my heart with drinking , for the Wines of those Countries are exceeding rich , generous , and full of spirit ; and with this I had pretty well recouered my selfe , and receiued new courage . And my feet , that were wearied out with bearing my belly , though empty , and of small weight ( as being lightly laden ) now that it was full , and had his loade , made shift to carry my feet .

And so I went on on my way , with no small care to know , what knacking of a a Castanneta , is the stroke or sound , that is giuen with the Thumbe , and the middle finger , when they dance . And to make the noise the lowder , they tye two hollow thinne pieces of wood to their thumbe , which are made round after the manner of your Chesse-Nuts . Castanneta , beeing deriued from Castanna , which signifies a Chesse-Nut . Castannetas that might be , which made the Egges that I had eaten , to daunce in my mouth . My imagination was working to and fro vpon this matter ; and the more it did beat vpon it , the more misfortunes represented themselues vnto me , and my stomake began to stirre more and more : for I could suspect nothing lesse then a kinde of loathing , seeing how ill they were drest , of what blacknesse the oyle , like to that which is in the bottome of a Lampe ; a fowle Pan ; and a fowle bleare-ey'd Hostesse .

Thus my imagination running from one thing to another , I met at last with the truth ; and hauing gone another League , my fancy wrought so with me , that I could hold no longer . For as it is with your women that are with child , so was it iust with me . Eructations and belchings did come and goe from my stomake to my mouth , till at last I fell a vomiting , till there was not any thing left within me . And euen yet to this day , me thinkes I heare those little chickens , those poore pretty fooles , cry still peepe , peepe , within my bowels .

Being in this miserable taking , I sate mee downe on the side of a hollow Ditch , that seru'd for a fence to certaine Vines that were thereby ; considering with my selfe the misfortunes that I had , and was like to runne into , much repenting my selfe of my ill aduised departure . But it is , and euer will be the fashion of young fellowes , to cast themselues away headlong , vpon their present pleasures , without hauing an eye , or any regard in the world to their future hurt , or the harme that will follow after .

CHAPTER IV.

Guzman de Alfarache , recounteth to a Carrier what had betided him with his Hostesse : And discourseth of laughing . After that , hee tels two short Tales ; one , of a couetoas Physician ; the other of two young men , how they vs'd the said Hostesse : And vpon the neck of that fals into a learned Discourse , touching the pardoning of iniuries .

TRoubled in minde , full of care and thoughts , and pensiuely musing with my self , I lay all along on the ground , leaning mine head vpon mine arme ; when by chance a Carrier hapt to passe by , who went along with empty Mules , which were to be laden with Wine at the Village called Caçalla de la Sierra . He seeing me sitting in this melancholly manner , a Yong Strippling , all alone , afflicted in minde , handsome in my person , and reasonably well clad , as one that had beene much made of heretofore , began ( as I then conceiued ) to pitie my troubles , and to take compassion of me , asking me , what the matter was , that I was so sad . I told him all that had hapned vnto me in my Inne ; and had scarce made an end of my Tale , when he brake forth into such a You le of laughing , that he was ready to burst , and I to breake forth into choller . And that face of mine , which before was as pale as ashes , was set on fire by those coales of anger , which were kindled in my brest against him . But because I was not then a Cock that stood vpon my owne dunghill , nor scarce mine owne man ; as also for that I found my selfe disarmed , and as it were in a desart by my selfe : I held my tongue , and said nothing vnto him , because I could not crowe as I would . For it is discretion to dissemble that , which a man cannot helpe ; Patiently brooking this his rather grinning , then laughing : And those ends that are doubtfull in their obtaining , must be throughly first consulted on , and be reduced to some certain grounds and Principles . For opinions are various , and honours vitreous , glassy , and subiect to breaking . And if I should there , at that time , haue mis-behaued my selfe , happely he would haue laid hold on me first , and by aduenturing to gaine vpon him , I might haue runne the hazzard , if not the certainty of losing all . For Competition is a thing to be auoided . But if it cannot be auoided , but that we must needs haue it , let it be with our equals ; and rather of the two , with thy Superiours , then thy inferiours ; but haue a care that thou doe not ouer-match thy selfe with those that are too strong for thee , lest they trample vpon thee , and tread thee vnder foot . Euery thing hath its Vice , and there must an account be giuen of it . But although I did forbeare him ; yet he had so heated me , that out of the warmth of that choller , which yet boyled within me , I could not choose but tell him :

My friend ; Doe you see me coated for a Foole ; or with a Fooles Cap on my head ? Or what else is it that occasions you thus to laugh ? He , rather increasing , then ceasing his laughter , as if it had beene a taske put vpon him , or The description of laughter . a part that he had beene enioyned to play : so fast it came from him , that gaping with his mouth fist-wide , he let his head fall on tone side , ( for hee was not able for laughing to hold it vpright : ) and laying both his hands as hard as he was able , one while vpon his belly , another on his sides , for feare of bursting ; he was scarce able to sit vpon his Beast for falling , and seemed with his extreme straining of himselfe , as if he would at euery bout haue come tumbled downe on the ground .

I was about to answere him some three or foure times , but I could neuer come to doe it : for I no sooner offered to speake vnto him , but he presently fell a fresh to his laughing till he chuck't againe ; so did his pot runne ouer , when it once fell a boyling .

God be thanked yet at last , after this great invndation and sudden breaking forth of waters , ( that those ouer-flowings of Tagus could not be greater ) began to fall by little and little , by patches and by pieces , now a word & then a word , as well as he could , hauing taken a little breath , deliuering his minde by halfes , like one that stumbles and goes , and goes and stumbles , he blunderd forth these words vnto me : My good Youth , I doe not laugh at your ill successe , nor doe your mis-fortunes glad me any whit at all : but I laugh at that , which hapned to this woman scarce two houres since . Did you happely meet with two young fellowes , that were Camerades , and walkt along together , and seemed by their habit to be Souldiers ; the one clad in a medley greene suite ; the other in a gray or ash-colour'd cloth , with a white doublet cut to the skin ? These two ( quoth I ) by your description , if my memory doe not faile me , when I left the Inne , remained there behinde , beeing newly come in , when I went my way , and called for their dinner . These then ( said the Carrier ) are those that haue reuenged your quarrell . And the iest , that they put vpon the Hostesse , is that which I now laugh at . But if you goe my way , get vp vpon one of these beasts ; & as we ride along I will tell you how it was . I thankt him for his kindnesse , as I had good cause so to doe , considering my present necessitie , rendring him such good language , as I thought might make sufficient paiment for such a courtesie . For good words requite good workes , when a man is not able to pay him , that he is beholding vnto , in better money ; Kinde words currant money in case of necessity . and that he is in necessitie , to whom the kindnesse is done .

Mounting my selfe then vpon this ill accoutred Gennet , howbeit it was no better then a plaine Asse with a pack-saddle ; yet it seemed to me a Silla de manos , or easie hand-Chayre , a Litter or a Coach , drawne with foure horses . For some succour , in case of necessitie , although it bee little , yet it helpeth much ; and that which is but a triffle to him that giues , is an infinit supply to him that wants : it is like a little stone , that is throwne into a smooth & cleere water , which makes not only many , but great circles also . And then is a kindnesse most to be esteemed , when it comes in a good coniuncture , albeit it alwayes comes well , and neuer too late , so as it come at last . Now ( me thought ) I saw Heauen opened , and my honest Carrier appearing vnto me in the shape of an Angell . His face was as ioyfull vnto me , as that of the desired Physician is to him that is afflicted with sicknesse . I say , desired ; because ( as perhaps you may haue heard ) a Physician hath three faces . Of a man , when wee see him , and haue no need of him : Of an Angell , when we are sicke , and cannot bee A Physician hath three faces . without him ; and of a Diuell , when at one and the selfe-same time our sicknesse , and our purse ends together , and yet for his priuate interest and to gaine a fee , he followes vs with dayly visits . As it hapned to a Gentleman in Madrid , A Tale of a Physician that lou'd money too well . In Spaine your Physicians fee is ordinarily two shillings ; t●…e better sort giue foure shillings , and the ▪ best seldom aboue a ●…rowne . The nature of Scr●…ants . who hauing sent for a Physician , for a certaine infirmity , where-withall he was troubled , euery visit that he made , gaue him a Crowne . The humour ceased ; but his Physician was not in the humour to cease from comming vnto him .

Now the Gentleman , when he saw that he was thorow well , and that his Physician did still continue his Visits , he got him vp one morning very early , and went to Church .

Now , when the Physician came to visit him , and found him not at home , he asked his seruant whither he was gone . He ( like a foole as he was ) for there are seruants still inow for their Masters hurt , but few for their profit , told him , that he was gone forth to Masse to such a Church . My nimble Doctor , putting spurres to his Mule for to make the more haste , went with all speed to the said Church , and searching for him , at last he found him ; and then said vnto him ; What a-Gods name , Sir , doe you meane to commit so great an excesse , as to go abroad without my leaue ? The Gentleman , who knew well inough what he came for , and seeing that now he had no more need of him , put his hand in his pocket , tooke out his purse , drew foorth a Crowne , and putting it in his hand , told him ; Here , take it ; ( master Doctor ) for by the faith of a Gentleman , I now perceiue , that this sacred place cannot priuiledge me from you .

See here , how farre the couetousnesse of a foolish Physician carries him ; and how farre the vertue of a quicke and noble disposition , this other Gentleman .

I betooke me to my beast , and fetching my rise , I got vp vpon his backe , and away we went together : and wee had scarce gone a furlong from the place , but we met with two Church-men that sate there hard by , expecting some passengers , that would carry them on horse-backe towards Caçalla , ( for there was their dwelling ) and had beene at Seuill about a certaine Suit in Law . By their carriage and their countenance you might well know their good life and their pouertie . They were well spoken men , very kind , and very courteous ; the one was about some 36. yeeres of age , the other aboue fifty . They made the Carrier stay , they agreed with him ; and , doing as I had done before , they got each of them vp vpon his Asse , and wee proceeded on our iourney .

But all this while , so great was the laughter of this honest man , and so excessiue beyond all measure , that he could scarce go on with his tale : for betwixt euery word he would let go the sluce of his sides , whilest like a Flood that furiously breakes foorth , his laughing suddenly flushes out vpon him : and as in houses , where men vittaile vpon the way , a man shall meet many times with a bare couple of Hens onely amongst fiue hundred persons ; and see what they want in good cheere , they make vp with good mirth : so this mans laughter was three-fold more then his discourse ; so farre did his spleene out-talke his tongue . These his delayes were so many Speares in my sides ; euery deferring was a farther prouoking : so that I was all this while vpon thornes . For he that hath a longing desire to know a thing , would willingly haue one word come treading on the heeles of another ; and with a quicke and nimble pace come ( if it were possible ) huddling all at once out of the mouth .

Neuer any woman that hath beene with child , did euer more earnestly long for any thing , then I did to know the successe of this businesse . Mee thought I did consume and pine away while I was held in this suspence , I could haue burst for anger , that my eares were put off , from hauing a present hearing : for I could not but expect , that some great matter must arise from such a glorious and ingenious Fabricke , as this made show to be . I began to conceit with my selfe , whether some fire falne from heauen , had consumed the house , and all that was therein : or whether those young fellowes had set the house on fire , and rosted my Hostesse aliue : or at least ( for a lesser reuenge could not be taken ofso vile a creature ) whether or no they had stript her starke naked , and hung her vp by the heeles vpon an Oliue-tree , and giuen her some thousand lashes , till they had left her for dead : for lesser things then these , his laughter could not promise . Howbeit , I must confesse , had I beene then so wise and considerate , as I should haue beene , I ought not to haue Excessiue laughter condemned . look't for any great matter , or to presume that any good thing could proceed from one , that was thus immoderate in his laughter . For euen that which is moderate , doth in a kind of manner , accuse a man of lightnesse , argue indiscretion , want of iudgement , and store of vanity : but that which is dis-composed , and out of Reasons compasse , is ( though there be neuer so much occasion offered ) the marke of a mad-man , and the onely note of an absolute Asse , or complete Foole .

At last ( God be thanked ) this Mountaine brought foorth its Mouse : in conclusion , he told vs , ( but with a thousand stops and iumpes , and his wonted bounds and curuets of laughing ) that he hauing stayd to drinke a little A iest put vpon an Ho●…esse by two young fellowes . wine , and to tarry the comming of a Companion of his , whom he had left behind , he perceiued , that the Hostesse of the house brought in on a Plate , a Froyze of sixe egges ; three of them starke naught , the other not so bad ; which she set before them : and going about to diuide this their Froyze or Tansey in twaine , it seemed vnto them , that it made a certaine kind of resistance , refusing ( as it were ) to be parted , one piece hanging ( like torne ragges ) at the taile of another . Whereupon , because this seemed to be somewhat a bad signe , and such as they did not well like of ; they began to search a little more narrowly , what should be the cause thereof . They were not long in discouering the truth ; for they might discern certaine knobs and knurs in it ; which , had it bin any body but my self , he might at first sight haue seen how the world went , and where the fault lay ; but being a young Lad , I should easily haue swallowed such a Gudgeon , and should in good manners haue slightly past it ouer . But these were a little more curious , and more Court-like , and sifted it out so finely , that they found to their seeming , three little round bumps , like three little Chickens heads all clotted together . And this cleared the doubt ; for finding the bils of these pretty fooles somewhat hard growne and none of the tendrest , the pad that lay in the straw was presently perceiued . And they taking one of them betweene their fingers , going about to crush and breake it in pieces , it put foorth his bill , and began ( though dead ) to peepe foorth its head , and spake alowd vnto them , and told them plainely , whence , and what he was . So they couered the Plate , clapping another thereupon , and whispered somewhat in secret amongst themselues : what it was , I then knew not , howbeit afterwards it did manifest it selfe ; for presently one of them called out , and sayd ; Hostesse , haue you any thing else for vs ? she had a little before ( in their sight ) bought a a a Sabalo , is a knowne fish , and a sauoury , and is called Sabalo , quasi Sapalo à Sapore . In Latine they call it Alofa , Frista , Clupea . In fresh water it doth vs●…ally dye . Rondelecio de Piscibus , lib. 〈◊〉 . cap. 15. Sabalo , ( which is a Fish like a Shad ) which she had put vpon the ground for to rub off the scales of it , telling them ; I haue such a Fish here , whereof ( if you will ) I shall spare you a slice or two , other meat haue I none . I pray ( mother ) said they , broyle it vs quickly then , for we must be gone ; and if it stand with your good liking , set a price what you will haue for it all , and we will carry it home along with vs . She said , it being cut out into pieces , euery slice wil yeeld me a Royal , and I cannot bate you a farthing of it . They said , No : they thought it was too much , one Royall profit in the whole , were very good gaines .

At last they agreed for two Royals ; for a bad pay-master neuer reckons what he receiueth , nor stands a hucking for that , which he is to take vp vpon trust . It went against her heart to let them haue it so , howbeit the gaine of two Royals in foure , for so short a time as she layd it out of her purse , did worke much with her , and made her willing at last to let them haue it . She cuts it out into pieces , broyles two of them , they eate it , the rest they wrapt vp in a Napkin of her owne ; and after they had fill'd their bellies , being not well contented with their ill vsage , in stead of paying their Reckoning , they reckoned without paying . For one of the young fellowes , taking the Froyze of egges in his right hand , went directly thither where the old woman was vnpanching the belly of an old rotten sheepe , that had dyed in some ditch , to make thereof Tripes and Chitterlings , or ( as the Spanish word hath it ) b b Mondongo , is a ●…odge-podge made of the intrailes and trotters of a sheepe , or other beast , boyled , and sold at euery corner of the streets in Spaine to poore folkes . Mondongo's ; and with all the force that he had , threw it full in the face of her , seeling vp both her eyes therewith , which looked like an old wall all to bedawbed with rough-cast . Which plaistred eyes of hers , he had made so blind and painefull vnto her , that not daring to open them , she cryed out , as if shee had beene mad , whilest this his other Companion , behauing himselfe , as if he had rebuked him for it , and that he might be ashamed to vse a poore old woman in this vnciuill kind of fashion , threw me a handfull of hot ashes in the very face of her , and so they got them out of dores , telling her , as they went away ; Ah you old rotten Carrion , Qui en tal haze , que tal pague , you are now payd in your owne money : what you got by your coozening , you may now put it in your eye .

She was toothlesse , chap-falne , hollow-eyed , and wappering withall , her haire sluttishly hanging about her eares , vnkempt , and as greazie , as it was knotty ; a fouler Swine no man euer saw : mealed she was all ouer , like a Mullet dressed with Flowre , or a Flounder that is ready for the frying-pan ; with a gesture so graciously scuruie , a looke so pleasantly fierce , and in all the rest so handsomely ill-fauoured , that as oft as you shall but thinke either of it or her , you cannot ( if your life should lye vpon it ) but you must needes burst foorth into laughter .

With this , he ended his storie , telling vs , that he had now matter inough to laugh at all the dayes of his life . Whereunto I answered ; And I to weepe . Why , quoth he ? Because when time was , I did not do the like : but like a coward ( as I was ) suffered my reuenge to come from anothers hand . But I vow ( if God giue me life and health ) it shall cost her deare ; I will make her pay for the old and the new ; I will haue my penny-woorths out of her , and make my selfe that full amends , that the longest day she ha's to liue , she shall thinke vpon the egges , and the Youth .

The good honest Clergie-men much condemned their Hostesse , and did as much reprooue my speech ; for that I seemed to be grieued , that I had not done her a mischiefe . They both set themselues against me , and turning towards me , the ancienter of the two , seeing mee so angry and full of choler , spake thus vnto me :

Your hot and young blood moues you to say that , which your owne good nature and ingenuous disposition will by and by confesse to be ill : and I hope in God , that I shall worke so much good vpon you , that you will be sorry for the present , for what you haue sayd , and study to correct hereafter , not onely the acting of any such violent deed , but the very thought of it .

Saint Mathew in the fift Chapter of his holy Gospell , and S. Luke in his A discourse touching the pardoning of m●…s . sixt , reade vs this Lesson ; Loue your enemies , and do good to them that hate you . Wherein you are first to consider , that the Euangelist doth not say , Doe good vnto those , that do ill vnto you ; but he sayth ; Do good to them that hate you . For suppose that your enemy should hate you , yet is it impossible that he should hurt you , vnlesse you will your selfe . For , it being an infallible truth , that we are to account those as true goods , which are to continue for euer : and that those which faile vs to morrow , ( as they often do ) are more properly T●…ue good is that which is ete●…all . to be called euils , for the ill vse which we make of them : since that in the trust that we haue in them , & nos ipsos , & illa amittimus , wee lose both them and our selues . We may reckon these our enemies , to be our best friends ; and The goods of this ●…orld are not good . these our friends to be our greatest enemies ; in regard of the effects which arise from the one and the other : for , from our enemies , ariseth all our true good ; and from our friends , our assured hurt . Wee may plainely perceiue , A faithful friend , what go●…d he may do ●…s . how that the greatest good that we can draw from the faithfullest friend that we haue in this world , can be no more , then to pleasure vs , either with his purse , by giuing vs all that he hath ; or by his life , by employing it in those things that giue vs content ; or by his honour , by not sticking to hazard that for vs , when our reputation shall lie at the stake . In which two latter none will aduenture themselues ; or there are so few of them to be found , that I doubt we shall not be able to produce any example in these times wherein we liue . But say it were so indeed , and that there were some such kind of men now adayes , and should iumpe together in all these three repeated particulars , when they haue done all that they can , it is much lesse ( if in that which is not at all , a magis and a minus ; a more , or a lesse , may be found ) then a Geometricall point . For , when he hath giuen me all that hee hath in this world , ( were it neuer so much ) it is too small a substance to free me from hell . Besides , men do not now adayes spend their wealth , and their riches vpon the vertuous , but such as are conditioned like themselues , and assist them in their sinnes ; and these are the friends that they reckon of , and to these their purse is open .

If for my sake , my friend should lose his life , one minute of time is not added thereby vnto mine ; if he should put his honour in perill , nay say , he should be willing to lose it quite for his loue to me , I say , that is not honour , nor may it be so called : for true honor is that , which is ingaged in the seruice of God ; and whatsoeuer is otherwise , and hath not some reference thereunto , is false and euill . So that , whatsoeuer my friend shall throw vpon me , being it is temporall and of no continuance , it is vnprofitable , vaine , and of little or no woorth at all . But my enemy , proues all pure wheat ; all turnes to profit , that comes from him to me ; so that my selfe will be willing to make true vse The good we receiue from our enemies . thereof . For from his ill-wishing to me , doe I come to wish well vnto him ; and therefore God will wish well againe vnto me , and do me good , ( though I deserue ill ) for that I do good for ill . If I pardon him a light iniury , to me are forgiuen and remitted an infinit number of sinnes ; and if he speake ill of me , and I speake well of him , his euill language cannot hurt me ; and his bitter tongue shall bring me a blessing ; Come ye blessed of my Father , &c. So that by his thoughts , words , and workes , my enemy makes mine to be good and true .

And what is the cause , thinke you , of this so great a wonder , and whence is the force of this so excellent a vertue ? I shall tell it you , because it is a thing commanded by God , because it is his expresse will and commandement so to do . And if we are to obserue that of the Princes of this world , much better ( without comparison ) is it , to keep that which is commanded vs by the King of heauen : before whom are humbled all the hearts both of heauen and earth . And that saying of his , I command you this , is a * * Gods commandements are sweet . sweet conserue , which is applied to the distasted palate of him that is commanded . As if the Physicians should prescribe their sicke Patients to take flowres of Oranges , young preserued Wall-nuts , buds of Limmons , rindes of Pome-Citrons , the rootes of wild a a The Spanish word is Escorzonera . This ●…rbe the I a●…es call Viperina , a species of that which they call Barba de Cabron . It is called Escorzonera , because it is good against the venyme of Toades , and all other venymous Vermin ; and amongst the rest , the Viper . This Plant was first found out in Spaine in Catalunna , by a slaue of Barbary . And in haruest-time men being slung by Vipe●…s , they gaue them the iuyce of this herbe , wherwith they were healed . There is excellent good now in this kind , in the Sierras de Cuenca in Spaine . Vide Mathiolo , lib. 2. cap. 137. Et Couarruuias , verb. Esco●…zonera . We must obay God . Borage , or Buglosse . What shall I say more ? O my good Lord , doe not giue me any such thing ! for a body that is strong and in health , can by no meanes away with it , but is rather vnpleasing then otherwise . But for the better swallowing of these Pilles , and to make the rellish the sweeter , they are so well candyed and rolled vp in Sugar , that what was hard in it selfe to be taken downe , is now become sweet and sauoury vnto vs . The like effect doth this sweet Conserue of Gods Word worke with vs . I commend ( saith the Text ) that ye loue your enemies . This is a dainty Sauce , made for that soure Morsell , which before was so vnsauoury to our tastes . So that , that which goes most against our stomackes , and which flesh and blood can hardly indure , by reason of its bitternesse , being to our concupiscences and fleshly desires , no better then very Gall and Worm-wood ; The Spirit tels vs in the voyce of a good Physician , now it is made more pleasant , more sauoury and sweeter for you , since that Christ our Redeemer hath so commanded it . So that if a man should now strike me on the one cheek , I would turne the other : for it is an honour vnto vs punctually to obserue those orders which are deliuered vnto vs by those that are set in authority ouer vs , and not to breake them in the least branch or tittle .

A Generall doth command one of his Captaines , that he make good such a strong place or passage , by which the enemy is to passe ; where , if he will himselfe , it shall be in his power to ouercome him , and to kill him : but his Generall tels him ; Take heed , I charge you , for it much importeth my Seruice , and it is my pleasure so to haue it , that when he shall passe by you , you offend him not , but let him goe quietly along , notwithstanding that he should giue you cause to the contrarie , and prouoke you all that he can to fight with him .

Now when this his enemy shall passe thus along by him , and shall braue him to his face , and reuile him with reprochfull and iniurious termes , calling this Captaine Coward , and other the like disgracefull names , will this Captaine ( thinke you ) though thus mightily abused , and affronted in the face of the whole Armie , offer him hereupon any offence at all , or violently set vpon him ? No certainly : But he will rather laugh at him , as a Braggadoccio , and vaine-boaster ; and though he could easily haue ouerthrowne him , and kill'd him at pleasure ; yet he doth it not onely because he would keepe that Order which was giuen vnto him : And if he should haue broken it , he had done very ill , and contrary to his duty , and therefore had well deserued to be punished for it . What reason then is it , that we should not diligently obserue the orders and ordinances , giuen vs by God ? Why should we goe about to breake them ; or seeke euen in the least kinde of manner to contradict them ? If a Captaine , for his pay onely , and vpon hope of some better preferment ( which is a hazzard , whether he shall euer attaine there-unto or no ) shall bee so punctuall : why should not we be as obseruant , since we shall gaine thereby God rewardeth the obedient . a celestiall reward , which is reserued for vs ? Especially , since that hee that made the Law , had the first handsell of it himselfe , and submitted himselfe thereunto , by suffering and receiuing from that vnhallowed and sacrilegious hand of an vnder-officer , a great buffet on that most sacred face of his , without returning him so much as an euill word , or any angry looke .

If God himselfe could be content to indure such rough vsage , and pocket it vp with so much patience : Why should this same Nada del hombre , this same nothing of man , this res nihili , why I say should he be puffed vp with pride , Man ought to be humble , not proud . transported with passion , and stand vpon his puntos , and termes of honour ? And why , for to receiue satisfaction of a poore silly word , shot out vn-awares , or aduisedly ; or howsoeuer ( complaining of the infinitenesse of the wrong ) breaking forth into rage , should one Christian challenge the field of another , seeking amongst Infidels , as if he were one of them himselfe , a a a The Duell , in Spaine is a capitall crime . And therefore the Spaniards , when they 〈◊〉 1 the Field , g●…e into Barbary to end their quarrell . place , where to fight it out ; or ( to speake more truely ) to thrust themselues wilfully into the hands of the Diuell their mortall enemy , flying from those of their Creator ?

Of whom we may learne , that when he was to leaue this world , and was to seale his last Will and Testament , he suffered himselfe to bee nayled to the Crosse , his body to be bored , his flesh to be torne , being full of paine , and gored all in bloud , from the sole of his foot , euen to the crowne of his head , whose haire did cleaue to his most precious bloud , being congealed and clodded together in hard-plotted Knots , and matted , as it were , with the cruell wounds , occasioned by that his sharpe thorny crowne , which they scornefully crowned him withall . And when he was to take his leaue of his Mother , and A lesson for the forgiuing of our enemies . that his beloued Disciple , amongst other his last words that he vttered , as it were by way of his last request , and charge vnto them , and in that his violent and extreme agony , which was then plucking vp his soule by the rootes from his diuine body , he prayed vnto his eternall Father , that hee would pardon those that had thus persecuted him , and put him to this so shamefull and painfull a death .

This mildnesse of our Sauiour , was imitated by Saint Christopher : who , Saint Christopher his ●…wer to one that 〈◊〉〈◊〉 him . when he had a sound boxe on the eare giuen him , calling that to mind , which his Master had before receiued , told him that strooke him ; If I were not a Christian , I would be reuenged on thee . So that reuenge then , is a member put apart from the children of the Church our Mother .

The like blowe was giuen to Saint Bernard in the presence of his brethren ; S. Bernards saying , touching the suffering of i●…ies . and they being very earnest to reuenge this wrong done vnto him , hee ranne in amongst them , telling them , It is not fit , that we should reuenge the iniuries done vs by others , when as wee doe all day-long , kneeling humbly on our knees , craue pardon for our owne offences .

Saint Steuen , when they were stoning him to death , doth not grieue for S. Steuen prayes for his persecutors . those cruell blowes , which bereaue him of his life ; but his sorrow was , to see that these bloudy Ministers should lose their soules ; and grieuing for them , desires God , euen then , when the pangs of death were vpon him , that hee would pardon his persecutors , and Saul especially ; who being deceiued , and zealous of his Law , thought to merit heauen by looking to the Cloakes and other cloathes belonging to those that were the Executioners ; to the end that hauing nothing to hinder their armes , they might , being ridde of those lets , wound him with the greater force .

And so feruent was his Prayer ; that this glorious Apostle Saint Paul was afterwards reduced to the faith ; who like a wise Doctor , well experienced in S. Paul teacheth vs to forgiue our enemies . this doctrine , finding it to be so necessary a thing , and so much importing our saluation , as nothing more , giues vs this good counsell : That we should forget and lay aside all anger ; that we should not suffer the Sunne to goe downe vpon our wrath . Rather blesse then curse your persecutors : Giue them to eate , if they suffer hunger ; and if they be a-thirst , giue them drinke : which if you shall not doe , the same measure that you mete vnto others , shall be mete vnto you againe : and as you forgiue , so shall you be forgiuen .

The Apostle Saint Iames saith ; Without mercy shall they be iudged , that haue no mercy : and the rigour of iustice shall be returned on those that are S. Iames instructeth vs to be mercifull . rigorous .

Very fearefull of the breach of this diuine precept , was Constantine the Great ; who , when one told him , how his enemies , to affront him , had in contempt Constantine the Great , & his great patience . and scorne of him , throwne stones at his picture , wounding him with their strokes in the head and the face ; so great was his modesty , that neglecting the iniury , he began to touch & feele with his hands from place to place all the seuerall parts of his body : Asking , when he had so done ; What are become of these blowes ; where are those wounds you talk off ? I feele none , nor haue I any paine of all those thou tell'st me , they haue done vnto me . Giuing thereby to vnderstand , that there is no dishonour done to any , but to him that will esteeme it so . Besides , he was willing thereby to inferre , that whosoeuer does thee an iniury , shall not scape scot-free , or goe cleere away with it , though thou doe not reuenge it ; nay , though thou for thy part shouldst pardon the wrong that he hath done thee : For what iniury he hath offered vnto thee , he hath likewise offered the like vnto God , whose , both thou and he art . Duenno tiene est a hazienda ; these goods haue an owner ; And therefore you must not be your owne caruers . For , if in a Princes Palace , or a Kings Court , any affront shal be done , it is likewise done vnto the Lord thereof : nor shall the pardon of him that is affronted be sufficient absolutely to excuse the other , because by that indiscreet act of his , and inferred iniury , are likewise iniured the lawes of that Prince , the good gouernment of his house questioned , and his Kingdome scandalized thereby . And therefore God saith , Reuenge God fauoureth and defendeth the wronged . belongeth vnto me ; and when I see my time , I shall punish the offender : Vengeance is mine , and mine owne hands shall execute the same . Wretched then is that man , who is thus threatned ; for if Gods owne hands shall giue him his chastisement , better had it beene that he had neuer beene borne . So that thou must neuer requite ill with ill , vnlesse thou wilt that ill shall light vpon thy selfe . Moreouer , thou shalt merit much thereby , and thou shalt be thine owne pay-master : for , by imitating him that commandeth thee , thou shalt be made like vnto him . Giue way therefore to the ire and fury of your persecutors , that you may merit Gods fauour : Thanke him for these outrages and wrongs that are done you , and you shall in requitall receiue glory : and obtaine eternall rest . — And there he rested . —

I would fame haue committed to memory that good doctrine which hee deliuered vnto me to this purpose , that I might repeat it heere vnto you . For it was all heauenly stuffe . Fine , most fine holy Scripture . From that time forward I vnfeignedly propounded to my selfe to make true profit thereof . And if it be well considered , he spake very home , and well vnto mee . What greater ●…uenge can there be , then that a man may be reuenged if hee will ? Injury , how foule a thing it is . Posse , nolle , nobile , is as true a saying as it is old : And what thing can bee more foule then reuenge , being that it is a passion of iniustice ? And such a one , as none is more odious in the sight both of God and Man ? For it is onely proper vnto brute beasts . Reuenge is but a kinde of cowardize , and a certain Reuenge , what it is . Actus foeminilis , an effeminate Act , and womanish kinde of weakenesse : Whereas the forgiuing of a wrong , is a glorious kinde of Victory . The reuengefull man makes himselfe the Reus , when by pardoning , he might bee made the Actor ; that is , in stead of an Accuser , the Accused . What greater presumption can there be in the world , then that the creature should vsurpe the office of his Creator ? appropriating that vnto him , which is none of his ; and going away ( as we say ) with another mans wealth , whereunto hee hath no right in the world ? If thou thy selfe art not thine owne , nor in thine owne Man hath nothing that is his , no 〈◊〉 so much as himselfe . disposall ; neither hast thou any thing of thine owne in thee , that he , who ( as thou sayst ) hath offended thee , can take from thee . Such actions as these , thou canst not commence thy selfe , they belong vnto thy Lord , which is God : Leaue vengeance therefore vnto him . God will take it of the wicked , tardiùs aut citiùs , at one time or another , early or late . And that cannot bee termed too late , which is in a continuall inclination to its end . And to take it out of his hands , is a heynous offence , a mighty mis-regard , and a contempt in the highest degree .

But admit satisfaction should belong vnto thee , and that the Law were in thine owne hands ; tell me , I pray thee , What thing can be more noble , then to doe good ? And what more good , then not to do ill ? One onely , which is this ; To doe good vnto him , that doth ill vnto thee , and doth persecute thee , as it is commanded vs , which we are bound to obey . For , to repay ill with ill , is the Diuels office ; to doe good to him , that doth good vnto thee , is a naturall debt betweene man and man ; nay , the wilde beasts of the Forrest doe acknowledge as much , and doe not waxe furious against those , that do not seeke to hurt them . But to procure and worke that mans good , that would doe thee a mischiefe , and cut thy throat , if it were in his power to doe it ; this is opus supernaturale , a worke aboue the reach of nature : it is that diuine Ladder , whereby we climbe vp by the rounds of Charitie , to glorious Eternitie ; it is that key of the crosse , which openeth the gates of Heauen : it is the soules sweet peace ; and the bodies quiet rest . But reuenge is a life without quietnesse ; one cals vpon another , and all vnto death . Is not he a foole , nay , worse then a mad-man , who , if his doublet chance to wring him , will thrust his ponyard into his owne body ? And what other thing is reuenge , then to doe ill vnto our selues , out of a desire to doe ill vnto others ? And to plucke out both our owne eyes , to put out one of our enemies ? Or to spit against heauen , that it may presently fall againe in our owne faces ? Seneca vnderstood Seneca's saying touching e●…nge . this doctrine wonderfull well , when an enemy of his hauing giuen him a boxe of the eare in the Market-place , and all that saw it , did incite him to complaine thereof vnto the Iustice ; he smiling vpon them , said vnto them , Were it not a foolish part in me ( thinke you ) to call a beast into the Court ? As if he should haue said , With that buffet , hee like a beast did expresse his rage ; and I like a man , did scorne and contemne this his brutish behauiour . Can there be any brutishnesse greater then to doe ill ? Or can there bee any greatnesse like vnto that , which shall despise the ill that is done him , and set light by it ?

The Duke of Orleans hauing formerly beene iniured by one , when he was The French Kings answere . afterward King of France , he was put in minde , that hee might now be reuenged of the wrong he then receiued : for now it was in his power to doe it . But he , looking sowrely on him that did so aduise him , told him ; it was not fit , that the King of France , should reuenge the wrongs of the Duke of Orleans . If , for a man to conquer himselfe , be counted so great a Victory ; Fortior , qui se , quàm qui fortissima vincit moenia . Why , by subduing our appetites , allaying our anger , and rebating our rancour ; doe not we gaine vnto our selues this glorious Palme ? Since that , ( besides that which is promised vnto vs in the future ) euen in this life also , wee shall auoid many mischiefes , which may either take away our life from vs , or rob vs of this our vaine honour , and consume our wealth . O good God , had I beene a good Lad , that which I heard from that good man , I might haue been the better for it all the dayes of my life . But I was young , and past it quickly ouer ; that treasure was ill bestow'd vpon me , I lost it ; it was corne that fell in the high-way , it did not thriue with me . His good conuersation and doctrine entertained vs to Cantillana , whither we came about Sun-set : I with a good desire to my Supper , and my Companion with an earnest expectation to haue his , but that neuer came . The two Clergie men made their ranke apart , and went to a friends house that they were acquainted withall in the Towne , and we to our Inne .

CHAP. V.

How Guzman and the Carrier did eate of a young Mule , thinking it had beene Ueale , beeing coozened by his Host in Cantillana , and discourseth by the way of the coozening tricks , which ●…ad Hosts put vpon poore Trauellers .

WHen the Company , that came along with vs , had left vs , and were gone euery man his way ; I askt my Camerade , Whither shall we goe now ? He told me . Here 's an honest Host hard by , one of my old acquaintance , a good-fellow , where we shall be well lodged , fare daintily , and kindly entertained . Well , along we trudge together , till we came to this his so much commended Inne , hauing brought me ( as you shall heare hereafter ) to one of the veryest theeues , and arrantest knaues , that there was not such another in all that part of the Country wherin he liu'd .

Heere new occasion of matter was offered , fresh plates set vpon the boord , and such prouision , as you may therewith well entertaine the time . Was I not ( thinke you ) in fine taking when I leapt out of the Frying-pan into the fire ; and fell into Scilla , seeking to shunne Charibdis ? Our Host had for his owne vse a good strong Asse , and a Galitian Mare , that was a pretty little Tit. And because men in their necessitie , doe not stand vpon beauty , youth , nor pompe of apparell ; but content themselues onely with Night-caps , when their heads are mangie and scabbed ; it is no maruell , if the like should happen euen amongst brute beasts . They were alwayes fellow-feeders in one Stable , one Racke , and one Field ; and he that was owner of them , tooke no great heed to haue them tyde fast , but let them go loose of purpose to the end , that they might helpe the other Beasts in the Inne in the repeating of their lessons . Whereby it came to passe that this Mare grew great with Foale , by liuing at large amongst this good company .

It is an inuiolable law in Andaluzia , That no such Coniunction , or Commixture A Law in Andaluzia against the ●…aturall couering in horses . be permitted ; and to this end , grieuous penalties are ordained . This Mare then , hauing in her due time foaled a pretty young Mule , mine Host was willing to make profit thereof , and to that end nourished and bred it vp . He kept this businesse very secret some certaine dayes , and was wonderfull carefull , that it might not come to light : but because he saw it was not possible for him to hide this matter long , and to keepe it from the knowledge of the world , that he might not giue his enemies aduantage of reuenge ; carried away partly with the feare of his owne hurt , and partly with the greedinesse of gaine , he resolued ( this last Friday night ) to kill him . He cuts me out the flesh of it into pieces , which he powders vp in a pickle made of purpose , and made ready against the next day , ( being Saturday ) for his Ghests : partes minutiores huius animalis , vt pedes , ilia , venter , &c. all the intrailes and offals of These things are commonly eaten in Spaine vpon Saturdayes , by a custome receiued amongst them . this beast ; as feet , tripes , the cragge-end of the necke , tongue , braine , and the like . We ( as I told you ) came to our Inne in a very good hower : for he that trauailes , takes contentment vpon the way , that hee may come into his Inne betimes , that he may haue meat to fill his empty guts , and a bed to rest his weary bones .

My Companion , as soone as he had alighted and taken off his lading , and put vp all things safe , sets vp his Asses in the Stable , taking order for their dressing and their feeding . But I came thither so wearied , that I was not able when I lighted , to stand vpon my legges , but was faine to lie downe on the Vneasie riding causeth wearines . ground , and was not able for a great while to turne my selfe any way in the world . For all my muscles and sinewes were quite benum'd , my legges and feet swolne , with their long hanging downe for lacke of Stirrops , my breech extremely gall'd , my parts neerer my priuities full of paine , as if so many needles had beene stucke in my Groyne ; my body was all out of ioynt ; but of all other parts , my belly ( for pure hunger ) did most pitifully complaine .

Now when my Companion had ordered his beasts of burthen , and had eased them of their carriages , and had done all things fitting for one of his profession , my turne was next to be serued , and therefore said vnto him ; How now ( my Camerade ) what thinke you of the motion ? Is it not high-time ( thinke you ) to go to Supper ? He answered , It was ; the motion he told me , was very good , and that it was high time indeed : for he meant to bee stirring very early the next morning , and to reach betimes to Caçalla , and so to lade , and away . We ask't our Host , if he had any thing in the house for our supper ? He answered , He had ; adding withal , that we should fare very daintily . He was a burly-kind of man , yet of a stirring metall , nimble-witted , cheerfull both in his speech and countenance , an eternall talker , but aboue all a What a manner of creature our Host was . most excellent Villaine . His promising person ( I confesse ) did deceiue mee : for , seeing so good a presence , and not hauing knowne him before , the Spot at first sight , made show of a good Card. And hearing him say , that he could feast vs brauely , my very heart and soule did leape for ioy within mee : Oh , they were comfortable words ! Whereupon , I began with my selfe to giue thankes vnto God , reuerencing his holy Name , for that after our troubles he giues vs ease ; after sicknesse , health ; after a storme , a calme ; after sorrow , ioy ; and a good Supper , after a bad dinner .

I know not , whether I may well tell you or no , of a toung-errour , but a witty one , which came from a plaine country-fellow , whom I knew in Olias , being a certaine Village belonging to Tol●…do ? yet I shall make bold to tell it you , as well for that the thing in it selfe is not scandalous , as also for that it proceeded from the sincere heart of an Old Christians in Spaine are counted the best , by way of difference from the Moores , whom they call new Christians , as being but lately co●…rted . A 〈◊〉 of a country fellow . old Christian.

There were certaine good fellowes playing at Primera , and the third hauing discarded , the second cride , I am Prime ; God be thanked yet at last , that I haue got one game since I playd , said hee , that had the Prime . The other Country-fellow that was in the interim drawing his Cards , when he had puld them , found them to be all of one linage , and being glad that he had got the hand of him , suddenly brake soorth at that very instant , and sayd ; Not so much God be thanked neither , as you thinke for ; for I am Flush . If such a disparate , or idle toy as this , being not purposely spoken with either due measure , or to any certain end , but by meere chance , as it were , may be brought vpon the Stage ; this is its proper place , and the Scene well layd here , considering what befell vs . It s very well , ( said my Companion ) to mine Host ; Now and thou beest a good fellow , tell me , I pray thee , what dainty morsell hast thou prouided for vs ? This b b Socarron ; el vellaco dissimulado , que solo pretende su interes , y quando habla con vos , os està secretamente abrasando . Socarron , this dissembling Rascall , that was all for his commodity , & cared not ( so as he might get by him ) whom he coozened , told him ; Yesterday I kill'd a very delicate fine young Calfe ; which , because the Damme thereof was very weake ; and by reason , ( through the drinesse of the yeere ) that he wanted feeding , he caused this Calfe to be kill'd after it was some eight dayes old . The offals ; and the intrailes are ready drest , take what you please . After this , crying out Presto , bee gone , lifting vp his legges , and fetching a friscall or two , he flyes away in the ayre in a trice , clapping his heeles with his hands as he runnes along . With this , my heart began to be somewhat lighter then it was before , and it did reioyce me much to heare him say , that he had the Calues intrailes ; the very naming whereof , did make my Bowels to moue within me . And now taking leaue of my former wearinesse , looking cheerily vpon him , I said vnto him ; Mine Host , bring vs what you thinke good .

Thereupon , the Cloth was laid in the turning of an hand , our Linnen was cleane ; and our bread was not so bad as before , but our wine was passing good : we had also a fresh Sallad set vpon the Board in a faire Plate ; but for such washie Tripes as mine then were , I held it no good meate . And had it beene spared by me , either for any of the intrailes , or any one foot of a Calfe , it would neuer haue grieu'd me . But these premises might deceiue any discreet iudgement whatsoeuer , making the taste of an hungry appetite drunken with the very conceit of his promised fare . The Italian , by way of aduice , giues vs this good lesson ; That in the promises of Women , Mariners , and Inne-keepers , we should place small confidence : for they that are giuen to commend themselues , and their owne things , ( as all these vsually do ) they do all ( guessing the whole by the greater part ) generally lye . After he had set downe the Sallad , he brings vs in two little Plates , in each of which lay a little of this same Calues-plucke , I say , a little ; for he was afraid to giue vs too much ▪ lest through too much plenty , hunger being satisfied , and the belly glutted , we might more easily come to the knowledge of this deceit of his .

Leading vs thus ley surely along , we follow the sent we first ran vpon , and it seemed to our taste , that we still did eate , according to that conceit , which wee had intertained of this our supposed tender Veale ; and the more wee thought thereon , the greater edge was set vpon our appetite ; and as wee had a longing desire thereunto , so by degrees wee were still calling for the same hand againe . For my Companion , there was no care to be taken for him , all meates were alike to him ; for he was borne amongst Sauage people , and bred The defect which is in Country people in their seeding . vp by brutish Parents , whose palate was seasoned from the cradle with a cloue of Garlicke ; and your rude rusticall Clownes , ( as a thing not belonging to their either goodnesse or cleanlinesse ) in matter of taste can seldome distinguish ill from good . To most of them , there is a want of perfection in their Senses ; and albeit they see , yet do they not see that , which they ought to see : and though they heare , yet do they not heare that which they ought to heare : and so in the rest ; but more particularly in the tongue , which was not giuen them to murmure against any man , much lesse against those , that are gentle and noble , as well in their disposition , as their descent . But these kindes of vn-nurtured people are like vnto Dogs , who snatch and snap at euery thing , swallowing all that comes in the compasse of their chaps , without chewing : or like vnto the Ostrich , that will deuoure a horse-shoo , though it bee neuer so red hot . And if a double-soled shoo , which had done seruice three Winters in Madrid , treading thorow thicke and thinne ; lodo y mierda , durt and turds had beene set before such a fellow as this , he would haue made no bones of it , nor found no difference in the going downe of it . But that I , who was daintily brought vp , and borne of ciuill parents , and such as were neat and curious in their dyet , that I should not find out this deceit , my hunger must needs be great ; and this must excuse my errour . The desire that I had to eate something that was good , was exceeding great , so that euery thing seemed too little to feed mine eyes . This cunning Rogue , mine Host , gaue it vs by way of distillation , Limbecke-fashion , now a little , and then a little : and therefore The Hosts craft . it is no such wonder , had it had farre greater defects , that it should seeme vnto me a well-ordered Banquet .

Haue you not heard it sayd , Que à la hambre , no ay mal pan ? That all bread is sauoury to the hungry ? I say , all seemed to me to be Suckets , and Marmalate ; and me thought I should neuer haue enough to fill my belly . I demanded , if he had any thing else : He told me , we might ( if wee would ) haue the braines fryed , with some butter and egges . We told him , we would : but we are slower in telling him so , then he in going about it ; nay , almost in the dressing of it . In the meane while , lest we might not catch cold with standing still , like your Poste-horses when they haue run their stage ; he gaue vs to intertaine the time withall , a piece of flesh folded and rolled vp , made out of the Tripes , ( after the fashion of your rosted Oliues of Veale ) together with some of the Filme and rinde of the belly . I did not like the taste of it halfe wel ; it smelled ( me thought ) like rotten straw that 's throwne out vpon the dunghill . Whereupon I thrust it from me , leauing it to my Companion , who entred roundly vpon it , deuouring it as greedily , as a man would grapes , comming into a Vineyard in the time of Vintage . Nor did it grieue mee awhit to see him fall to it so lustily , but was rather very glad of it , thinking by this meanes , that when he had beene full-fed therewith , a greater part of the braines would fall to my share . But it fell out contrary to my expectation ; for he had neuer awhit the more cloyd his panch , nor did hee cease to lay about him with as good a stomacke , as if he had not all the day , nor night before , eaten so much as one morsell of bread .

The egges and the braines were set vpon the Board ; and when my honest Carrier saw this fine Froyze , he began , according to his old wont , to laugh out alowd , with as wide a throat , as you can imagine . I did fret , and fume , and chafe with my selfe out of all cry , conceiting with my selfe , that he made himselfe merry with my miserie , and tooke delight , to represent to my remembrance A guilty Conscience is ●…uermore suspicious , and full of feare . those former loathsome things , that had lately ouerthrowne my stomacke .

Our Host thereupon looking very soberly on vs both , with a watchfull eye obseruing our behauiour , and with an itching eare , listening to heare what we sayd ; seeing his dis-composed laughter so ill seasoned , and vn-occasioned , ( as he thought ) was much mooued thereat ; fearing , that hee had found out his Knauery : for vntill then , there was not any matter offered , that might mooue occasion of laughter . And therefore he was ielous , that the Foxe was now vn-earthed , and this must needs be it . And because a guilty person carries his a a Traer la barba sobre el ombro : Viuir recatado , y con recelo , como hazen los que tienen enemigos , que van bolviendo el rostro à vn lado , y al otro , de donde naçio el refran . Beard euermore vpon his shoulder ; & vmbrae suae imagine concutitur , and is afraid of his owne shadow ; because his owne conscience doth accuse him ; and the committed fault , represents the deserued punishment : Euery the least act , or inkling of any thing whatsoeuer , he imagineth , that it is all meant against him ; and that the very ayre doth whistle foorth his offence , and publisheth it to all the world .

This poore Rogue , ( albeit a very villaine ) hardened in roguery , and habituated in mischiefe , and being steeped , and layen long in soke , ( as it were ) in thefts , and all kinds of coozenages , was now out of heart , and grew silly and weake-spirited , and was ready to quake for feare . Besides , such kind of men are commonly Cowards , and haue onely an outside of men , but no manhood at all . Why is it ( thinke you ) that some men hacke and hew , and threaten to kill and slay , and like Tygres lay about them ? I will tell you the reason of it . They do this , not out of true metall , but to make others afraid , and to supply by this roaring carriage ; the defect of their courage : being like herein , vnto dogges ; whereof , those that are barkers , are the least biters : they are like your little a a Meliteos si dizen , porque se ●…hian de Malta . Melitean dogges , or a kind of foysting-Hounds , which are made all of noyse and barking ; but if you turne towards them , they clap their taile betweene their legges , and runne away . Our Host was ( as I haue told you ) much troubled ; for feare , suspicion , and ielousie , is a propertie , that is still incident to an euill liuer . He had quite lost his stirrops , nor did he know how or which way to recouer his seat ; but began to sweare with many great and horrible oathes that it was very good Veale that hee had set before vs , and that we had no iust cause , nor reason to laugh as we did ; and if need were , I could bring you an hundred witnesses to testifie as much .

These words he vttered with much passion ; with a face as red as fire , that the blood seemed to trickle downe his cheekes , and sparkles to flash for very anger foorth his eyes . The Carrier lifting vp his head and looking earnestly vpon him , told him ; Who medles with you , ( my friend ) what wrong haue we done you , that you are so cholericke ? We do not touch vpon you , no not so much as to aske you how you do , or how b b A Metaphor borrowea from women , who cannot ab●…ae to be 〈◊〉 , how old they are . old you are ? Haue you any c c The Spanish word is Aranzel , which is a Decree , or Law , which sets a taxe vpon such things as are solde . Tabula est , vbi scribitur ordo & pretium rerum venalium . deriued of a. articulo arabico , and rancel , que vale tanto , como decreto , determinçion , assiento . The Spaniards fashion of wondring . Edict , or Proclamation here in the house , that doth set a taxe or rate vpon laughing ; or to what proportion and quantitie your ghests shall be tyed to laugh , if at any time he be so disposed , vpon paine of some great forfeit ? or is this a generall sessing set thereupon , and you alone haue got the Monopoly thereof into your hands ? If it be so , good mine Host , let euery man weepe , or laugh , as he will himselfe ; and take that a Gods-name which is your due , and recouer your right of vs by order of Law . I tell you , Sir , you are mistaken in me ; for I am of that free disposition , that if I were minded to laugh at any thing of yours , I am not so meale-mouth'd , but I would plainely tell you at what I laught .

These egges now put me in mind of those other , which my Companion here did eate to day at an Inne some three Leagues hence . Then hee vp and told all that had passed , as my selfe before had deliuered vnto him ; and that which happened afterwards in his presence , betwixt the old Hostesse , and my two young Souldiers ; in the relating whereof , he seemed as if hee had beene bathing himselfe all the while in Rose-water , if a man might iudge the content he tooke in repeating the same , by his passions , his lowd laughters , strange visages , anticke gestures , and the diuersities of postures , in the bowing and writhing of his body , all the while that he was telling him this tale . Mine Hoste , he fell as fast a blessing and crossing himselfe , powring out Volleys of Exclamations , calling vpon , and often reiterating the name of Iesus , a thousand times one after another , and lifting vp his eyes vnto heauen sayd ; Our blessed Lady be my helper ; let her still be present with me ! Mal haga Dios , à quién mal haze su Oficio , let ill betide him , that performes his function ill . And because in his Theeueries and his Rogueries he was so good a Proficient , he might rest assured , that this malediction did not belong to him , so well had he exercised that trade all his life-time . Hee began afterwards to walk vp and down , & seeming somtimes to wonder , somtimes to complaine , at last he cryde out ; I wonder a-gods name , that the earth did not open , and swallow vp this Inne ? How is it possible , that God should dissemble his anger , Mine Host by railing on the old Hostesse , discouers the k●…auery of 〈◊〉 ●…pers . and forbeare to punish so vile a woman ? Does this old Witch liue ? is she not gone downe quicke to hell ? All Trauellers haue iust cause to complaine of her ; I now see , that all men haue reason to complaine of her ill vsage ; no man comes away contented from her ; all finde fault , not one that comes thence well satisfied , but are sorry that euer they came within her doores . Either all her ghests are very bad , or she her selfe : but it is not to bee imagined so many can be all bad ; and therefore sure the fault is onely hers .

For these , and other the like tricks , no passenger will stay to bait at her Inne , they haue all set a crosse vpon her doore , they blesse themselues when they goe by , and make large strides till they bee past that wicked house . I sweare vnto you , she should be soundly whipt , if she were well seru'd , that all other coozening queanes , such as she is , might take example by her . Her Signe was once pull'd downe , and order taken , that shee should not keepe victualling any more . And I much wonder , that she turning againe to the old byas , the officers returne not againe to punish her anew .

There is something in it , as the Ant said , but what it is I cannot tell you , that makes her to doe as she does . There must be some mysterie in it , what euer it be : for she robs and coozens with the like liberty to day , as she did yesterday ; and now , as last yeere : And ( which is worst of all ) she coozens with that confidence , as if she were commanded so to doe . And sure it must needs be so ; for the Guards , the Searchers , the Promoters , and the Alguazils , all see her dealings , and know them well inough ; yet they winke at them , and say not so much as blacke is her eye . These I warrant you be her fee'd men , she giues them good content , and greazes them in the fist with that , which she filches from others . For if it were not so , as sure as the coat is on your back , they would haue another fling at her , and pay her home againe with a poxe in her owne kinde .

Howbeit ( wretched woman as she is ) it is punishment inough vnto her , that she liu'd so long , as to discredit her house . For if she had kept good meat in her house , and vs'd her ghests well , behauing her selfe ciuilly , and demanding reasonable reckonings , her custome would haue been good , and all Trauellers would haue flockt vnto her house . And you know , De muchos pocos hiziera mucho ; Many a little , makes a mickle . For , by carrying but one graine of corne away with him at once , the Ant fils his granary , and liues in store and plenty all the yeere long . And had she done so , the proudest Officer of them all , could not haue set his foot vpon her neck , and teare her vngodly gaines out of her throat . But shame light vpon her , and all such as she is . The Diuell take such vnconscionable Inne-keepers .

When he had come thus farre and made his full point , I thought he would there haue left . But hee comes about againe , giuing vs this cloze for a farewell : Blessed bee that vnspotted purity of the Virgin Mary , that though I am but a poore man ; yet I thanke God for it , there is no such ill vsage in my house , no such deceitfull tricks ; Euery thing is heere sold for the thing it is : no Cats , for Conies ; nor Mutton , for Veale . Limpieza de vida , es lo que importé , a cleere conscience , is that , which will carry a man through thicke and thin . He may goe bare-faced through the world , and neuer bee ashamed , that hath led an innocent life . Let euery man enioy that which is his owne , and not defraud and deceiue one another .

Heere he stopt , and tooke in fresh breath , which was no more then needed , considering how fast his tongue walkt : And though happely he might thinke , that we might the more willingly giue him the hearing now that we had supt ; yet he heere cuts off the thread of his Discourse , and sayes no more , giuing vs in stead of our second Course , two or three Oliues , as bigge as Nuts . We intreated him that against the next morning we might haue a morsell of his Veale made ready for vs . He vndertooke that care , and we went to take our rest . Our boulsters , were our pack-Saddles ; and our bedding the cloathes that couered our Packs , which we stretch out as plaine as wee could vpon the bare Floore : and so we past ouer that night , as well as we could .

CHAPTER VI.

Guzman goes on , in recounting what succeeded with his Host of Cantillana , who had giuen him to eate of his young Mule , and of the misfortunes that befell the said Guzman : And how it is not good vpon the way to quarrell with our Host.

HAd I , the Sunday morning following , when it was day , been Guzman is extremely bitten by Fleas . set in the Market-place in Seuill , or at my mothers owne doore : I am doubtfull , whether they would haue knowne me or no. For I was monstrously Flea-bitten by that infinit number of Fleas , which had fed that night on my carkase , that it seemed they likewise indured a deare yeere , and that I was offered vp vnto them for a prey . And so in the morning I got me vp , looking for all the world , like one that had been sick of the small Pox , or infected with the Meazels ; my face and hands , and all my whole body ouer , not hauing one free place , or one spot of white , no , not so much as you might put a pins point betweene ; so miserably was I tormented with them .

But fortune was herein so fauourable vnto me , that what with the wearinesse Drinking freely , what it effecteth . of the iourney , and taking a cup or two ouer-night more then ordinary , I slept soundly , dreaming heauenly dreames , no noise hindring my quiet rest ; till that my Companion , whose minde ranne vpon hearing Masse betimes in the morning , and of his seuen Leagues which he had farther to goe , did awaken me .

We rise by the breake of day , before the Sunne was vp . And calling presently for our breakefast , it was brought vs in ; but it did not like me so well , as it did my fellow : for euery morsell , that went downe his throat , seemed to him , as if he had swallowed so many bits of the brawne of some yong tender Peacocks , and he did so much commend the goodnes of it , as if all the world could not affoord a daintier dish . And I was forced so to esteeme of it , by laying my faith vpon another mans taste , attributing that defect to mine owne bad palate , which this hungry hound had inherited from the Asse his father . But , to speake the plaine truth , it was starke naught , and as vile meat as a man could eate , and did not sticke to speake it selfe vnto mee in a knowne language .

To me it seemed tough , and vnsauoury , and of that little which I did eate ouer-night at supper , my stomake was so sur-charged with it , lying as heauy within me as Lead , that I was not able for my life to digest it . And albeit I was somewhat fearefull , lest my fellow should finde fault with me , yet did I not sticke to say vnto mine Host ; How comes this flesh to be so tough , and of that euill rellish , that a man can scarce fasten vpon it with his teeth ? Hee told me ; Do not you see , Sir , that it is flesh that hath been newly kill'd , and wants time for the mortifying and making of it tender ? Hereupon , my Companion taking his Q : It is not ( quoth he ) any lack of mortifying , or hanging in the ayre ; or that it does not eate tender and short inough , that makes this Gentleman to be so squeamish : but because he hath been fed from his cradle with spice-Buns , Sugar-Cakes , and fresh Egges , all other meates saue these , are hard both to his teeth and stomake . I shrunke vp my shoulders , and held my peace , as one that knew full well , that I was now as it were in another kinde of world , and that it was but one dayes patience more , and then I should be out of danger of vnderstanding such kinde of language any longer .

But for all this , I could not here-with rest contented , but still mee thought this meat had an ill smatch with it , of I know not what .

And as I was thinking thereon , it presently came in my minde what vnnecessary oathes mine Host made the night before , when he vow'd and swore it was Veale .

This swearing and staring of his , I did not like halfe well , and did therefore thinke , he did the rather lye , because he did so deepely sweare : for the truth hath no need of the confirmation of an Oath , vnlesse it be in open Court before a Iudge , or in case of great necessitie . Besides , all such satisfaction , Qui saepè iurat , saepè per●…urat . as offers it selfe by way of preuention , before the thing deliuered , is questioned , or called into doubt , makes the faith of the reporter to bee euermore suspected . I knew not what did ayle me , or what might be the cause of this ; for although I did not really conceiue any assured ill , I did as little presume , that there could be any good meaning herein . It was onely a touch of my imagination , a strange apprehension , that I had in my head at that time : Wherevpon I did not long dwell , nor made any great reckoning of it . So passing it ouer , I call'd for a reckoning , my Companion told me , I should let my purse alone , for he would pay for vs both . Whereupon I went aside , leauing him to be the Pay-master : thinking with my selfe , that out of courtesie , and this our new acquaintance , he was not willing , that I should pay my share of so small a shot .

I was very thankefull to him in my heart for this his kindnesse , and was not wanting to sing forth his praises , for this his freenesse and loue , which he had showne vnto me , euer since that he met me vpon the way , giuing me my horse-hyre , and my dyet gratis ; not suffering me to spend one penny in his company .

I thought with my selfe , this world would still hold , and that wheresoeuer I went , I should meet with some one or other that would beare my charges , and let me ride for nothing . I had now taken heart vnto me , and began to be prettily well flesht , and to forget my mothers teat , as if it had been noynted with Aloes , Worme-wood , or the like bitter stuffe , and so in all other things did I doe the like , whereunto I had beene formerly accustomed . And because it should not be said of me , Que delos ingratos estaua lleno el infierno ; That hell is full of vngratefull persons : While he was paying the shot , I was He that receiues a courtesie , euer ought to shew his readinesse to doe that man seruice from whom it comes . willing to shew some part of my thankefulnesse , by leading out his Asses to drinke , and carrying them backe againe to their cratches , to the end , that while they were saddling and making all things ready , they might champe vpon their strawe , and make an end of their prouender . I put a helping hand to all that was needfull , rubbing their foreheads and their eares , as well as I was able .

Whil'st I was busied in this , I had laid my Cloke vpon a bench hard by , which like Quick-siluer , before the fire , or smoake before the winde , was vanisht away in an instant , that I could neuer set eye on it any more ; nor could deuise in the world , what should become of it . I thought with my selfe , that either mine Host or my Consort , had , to make themselues merry therewith , hid it from me in iest . But it was now no more a iesting matter , for they beganne to sweare in good earnest that they had it not , nor knew what was become of it ; I made diligent search for it euen to the very gate which was shut , and had not yet been opened . There was no body there in the house but our selues , and mine Host , and therefore me thought it was impossible , that it should be lost , and that I might peraduenture forget my selfe ; and haue put it apart in some other place . Hereupon , I sought vp and downe all the house ; and going out of the Hall into the Kitchen , it was my hap to come into a back-Court , where I found a great plash of fresh bloud , and hard by it a Mules skinne , fairely stretcht out to its full breadth and length , from the which the feet were not yet cut off ; The eares were there at large , and all that part of the head towards the fore-head , neere whereunto were those other bones belonging to the head , onely the tongue , and the braines were wanting : Which I no sooner perceiued , but I was presently confirmed in my doubt .

Hereupon I streight goe forth to call in my Companion ; To whom , when I had made show of the Hide , that had bound in our breakefast and our supper , I then said vnto him ; What thinke you now , Sir ? Are not those things ( trow you ) Sugar-cakes , and new-laid Egges , in comparison of these that we eate at home ? This is that Veale , forsooth , which you so extolled to the skies ; and this the Host , you promised should prouide vs such dainty cheere .

What thinke you of the supper now , and the breakefast which he hath bestowed vpon vs ? Hath he not dealt well with vs I pray ? haue we not beene excellently well vsed ? He ( good man ) is none of these coozening Hosts , and cheating Inne-keepers , that will sell a Cat for a Cony ; and put away Mutton , for Veale . This is that innocent man , that may goe vnmaskt throughout the world , and care not who sees him , and lookes him in the face , he is so honest a man . This is that integer vitae , scelerisque purus , so vnspotted in his life and conscience , and so free from all ill dealing , that out of his owne integritie , made no bones to curse our Hostesse , and the euill vsage of her Ghests .

He was strooken so dumpe , and so full of wonder , to see what I had show'd him , that he had not a word to say ; but with his head cast downe into his bosome , went slinking away from me , and was so amazed at this strange sight , that all the day after till we parted company , I could not get from him so much as a word , saue what past at our parting when we were to take our leaue each of other . And that which then came from him , seemed to bee drawne out of the very guts of him , as you shall heare anon .

Howbeit , I was not ( as euery man may imagine ) very well pleased with this vnhappy accident ; yet notwithstanding , ( that this his floud of laughter might by this meanes be dammed vp , or the current thereof turn'd another way , wherewith euery moment before , my very heart and soule was ouer-flowne , and in a manner , quite drowned . ) I was wonderfully ouer-ioyed with this my misfortune , which did so much the lesse grieue me , because he had so great a share in it .

What with this ( which was vantage inough ) and the strong beliefe that I had that no man but mine Host could possibly conuay away my Cloake , I began somewhat more boldly to charge him with it ; It being euer incident to a good cause , to put strength into weakenesse ; and to adde courage to the He that hath right , hath courage . faint-hearted I began to put it home to him , and told him plainely that hee should answere me my Cloake , and that he had stolne it : But he very scornefully denies it , i●…ering and fleering at me ; and the more earnest I was , the more merry he makes himselfe . Wherewith my patience was so much mooued , that I could not hold , but threatned him ( in my choller ) with the Iustice ; yet did I not touch at all on this new businesse , nor spake one word to him of that which I had seene . But he , for that I was a young Lad , a poore Boy , and no body to take my part , began to domineere ouer me , telling me , that he had a rod for me in his pocket , and other the like reproachfull words , termes onely befitting Cowards , and men of base condition , such as himselfe . But because worms will turne againe , if they be trod on , and the gentlest Lambes grow mad , if they be too much wrong'd , vpon multiplying of words one begetting another ; and the latter worse then the former , at last wee fell foule . And as the fewnesse of my yeeres , and weaknesse of my strength would giue me leaue , I tore out halfe a brick-bat from the side of a Bench there-by , and threw it at him as hard as euer I could driue ; which , if I had hit him withall , and that he had not hid himselfe behind a pillar , I thinke I had beaten out his braines , and beene fully reuenged of the wrong he did me . But hee scap't my hands , and ranne as fast as his legges would carry him into his chamber ; whence he came foorth in all haste with his sword drawne in his hand .

Here you may see , what manner of men these roaring-Boyes be , since that He that is faulty 〈◊〉 coward . this great Gull doth not now seeke to defend himselfe with the force of his strong and brawnie armes , against those weake and tender twigges of mine ; forgetting , that he said , he would whip me , seeking now to offend mee by force of armes , I beeing but a grissle , and a poore simple dis-armed chicken . In this manner then , he makes towards me with his naked sword ; whilest I fearing what might follow , stood vpon my gard with two pibble-stones , which I had pluck't out of the pauement . Which when hee saw I had now ready in my hand , his courage began to be abated , and did not dare to draw neerer vnto me .

Now with the noyse and out-cries that were made vpon this occasion , the whole Inne was in an vprore ; and all the neighbours there-abouts , hearing the stirre , came flocking in vpon vs , to see what the matter was . All the whole street hasted thither , and with them a great throng of people , as well Iustices , as Notaries . There came in two Alcaldes , both at the same instant , and each of them stroue to haue the hearing of the cause , labouring to preuent each other . And the Notaries for their priuate gaine , euery one said , that this businesse did belong vnto him ; whereupon they grew at difference and oddes betweene themselues .

Vpon this contention , grew a second quarrell , no lesse fierce and tumultuous , then was ours : for on both sides , they digg'd vp their Grandfathers graues , twitting one another in the teeth with their fathers and their mothers , not sparing one anothers wiues , ripping vp their faults , and the course of life that they led ; wherein perhaps they did not lie : But they would no more vnderstand one another , then did we . Whilest we were in this hurly-burly , come in certaine Regidores , accompanied with other worshipfull Burgomasters of the Towne , who laboured to make peace betweene them , and laid hold on me . Que siempre quebra la soga , por lo mas delgado : for the weakest must stil go to the wal : and the Skeane there breaketh soonest , where the thred is finest . The stranger , the poore soule , the miserable man , he that ha's no shelter , no friends to sticke vnto him ; no great Ones to fauour him , he that is depriued of all succour and comfort , and hath no body to defend him , he is the man , whom the Iustice doth first take in hand .

They would needs know , what this stirre was , and whence it grew . They call'd me aside , and tooke my confession : I plainely told them all that had passed ; but because some that were thereby , might chance to ouer-heare me , I went apart with the Alcaldes , and told them in secret , that which I knew concerning the Machuelo , or little young Mule . They were first of all desirous to approue and verifie the cause ; but it seeming vnto them , that they had time inough to dispatch all , they vsed diligence for the apprehending of mine Host ; who was carelesse of any ill that might come vnto him for that offence . And perswading himselfe , that all this inquiry was onely about the Cloake , made but a iest of it , and laugh't at it as a thing of nothing , and could no way touch him , for default of Information , and those due proofes that I was to make , hauing no man , besides the Carrier , to witnesse for me , that I was seen to come in thither with a Cloake .

But afterwards perceiuing , that by little and little , this piece of hangings came to be seene , to wit , the skinne , and the rest of the appurtenances , the copy of my Gentlemans countenance was quickly altered , and began suddenly to looke blanke vpon the matter : so that , when they began to examin him , and had withall before his face shewd him the skinne ; confessing the fact , hee was conuicted , not hauing the heart to deny any thing , but told them the truth of all that had past .

For it is an assured truth , that base-minded men , infamous in their life , and ill-conditioned in their carriage and manners , are ( as I said before ) ranke cowards , and of no courage in the world . For , without hauing the torment giuen him , or before euer that he was threatned with the Racke ; vndemanded , he declared the Thefts , and the Rogueries that he had done , as well in that his Inne , as his robbing vpon the high-way , when he was a shepherd : whereby he got him a Stocke , to set vp for himselfe in the world . I all this while listened very close ; looking still when his confession should bring my cloake to light ; but out of the malice and hatred that he bare vnto me , that was quite left out . I vsed my best diligence I could , to make it appeare , but all would not serue the turne . After they had made an end of taking our declarations , I meane , the Carriers and mine , because we were strangers , they did in that particular ratifie and approue what we had deposed . And whilest this Plea was depending , whether or no ( till it were determined ) they should carry me to prison , and keepe me there ( tras paciente , aporreado ( as they say ) I must haue the wrong , & be beaten too , ) there were diuers disputes thervpon . The Notaries were very glad of this , & they did pretend I should : but one of the Alcaldes stood vp and said , That I had reason on my side , and was in no fault at all : and that they had no reason to question me any farther ; for it was punishment enough already for me , and too much too , that I was left thus naked in my hose and dubblet , and was coozened of my cloake . Hereupon , they let mee goe , but mine Host , he was led away to prison . And leauing him there , we prepare for our iourney ; and all things being made ready , we begin to set forward , passing along that street , where the Clergy-men stood looking for vs , each of them tooke his Asse , and away we go . By the way I told them the whole successe of the businesse : they blest themselues , when they heard of it , and much pitied my case . But because they could not helpe it , they committed it to God . My selfe and my Companion , what with the long time that was spent in this broyle , and the haste we had to be gone , wee went away without hearing Masse ; seeming rather to flie , then go foorth of the Towne . I ( for my part ) neuer mist Masse before , being accustomed all my life-time to that daily exercise of deuotion . From that time forward , it entred into my He that leaues God , God will leaue him . head , That from so bad a beginning , it was impossible to looke for a good ending . And that now , nothing could succeed well and happily vnto me . And so it fell out , as you shall heare hereafter . Nor can it be otherwise expected , when we serue our selues , and not God first ; and not begin with him , before we begin our businesse .

CHAP. VII .

Mans misfortune is here discoursed of , and to that purpose you haue a story told you of the gods of those ancienter times : And how Guzman , being thought to bee a Thiefe , was apprehended ; but afterwards being knowne what he was , hee was set at liberty . One of the Clergie-men promiseth to tell vs a story , to entertaine the time withall , vpon the way .

THe Egyptians , a great while ago , in those times of old being notable Sooth-sayers , ( as indeed they were ) amongst The Egiptians adoted Fortune as a goddesse . many other errours , which they had , this was one amongst the rest , that they adored Fortune , as a Goddesse ; verily beleeuing , that there was some such thing indeed . To her , they celebrated a Feast on the first day of the yeere , preparing sumptuous Tables , making great Feasts and costly Banquets , in a thankefull acknowledgment of the fore-passed yeare , and intreating her fauour , for that which was to come . They were fully perswaded , that this Goddesse was she , that had the disposall of all things , giuing and taking away at her pleasure , as supreme Gouernesse ouer all humane things . This they did , because they wanted the knowledge of one onely true God , whom we adore and worship , by whose powerfull hand , and diuine will , heauen and earth are gouerned , and whatsoeuer is created in them both , be it visible , or inuisible . It seemed somewhat strange vnto them , and were touched therewith to the quicke , when misfortunes began to light vpon them ; to see how one mischiefe came vpon the necke of another ; one no sooner past , but another at the heeles of them , not giuing them one hower of ease and quiet , neuer making an end , till they had made an end of man , and quite ouerthrowne him horse and foot : And how againe at another time ( like so many Cowards ) they come trooping all at once vpon vs , and neuer leaue assaulting vs , till they haue vtterly ruin'd vs , and throwne this our house of clay downe to the ground .

And on the contrary side againe , the time doth not ascend with that nimblenesse and quicke motion to the top of the highest mountaines , as Fortune doth eleuate and lift men vp by wayes and meanes , neither seene , nor thought vpon , neuer suffering them to continue still firme , either in the one , or t'other estate ; to the end that he that is deiected , may not despaire ; and hee that is exalted , may not presume . If the light of faith were wanting vnto me , as it was vnto them , I might ( giuing credit to this their errour ) happely say , when such like misfortunes should befall me ; Bien veng as mal , si solo vienes . Welcome is that misfortune which comes alone : yesterday morning I did complaine of little wearinesse , and of the two demy-Chickens that I had to dinner , going disguized in your Hermits habit , as vnwilling to be knowne . Afterwards , I came to make my supper vpon the stinking panch of a young Mule ; and which was worse , to feed vpon the flesh and braines thereof , which was all one in a manner , as if I should haue deuoured mine owne flesh ; I meane , by his a a The S●…e of a Mule , is an Asse . fathers side ; which may be euery mans case , as well as mine . And for an vpshot of all , the ill lucke that I had at last , to be coozened of my Cloake . Poco danno espanta , y mucho amansa : little losses doe onely startse and amaze men at the first , but great ones do quell and daunt a man , making him as gentle as a Lambe .

What treason hath beene plotted against me ? what squint-ey'd Starre hath scowl'd vpon me ? what misfortune followed me , since I came from home ? For from the time , that I first put foorth of doores , all things haue gone amisse with me , one mischance being the fore-runner of another , and the sad presager of worser things to come , which like a double Tertian went increasing vpon me , euery fit being worse and more violent , then the former , not allowing me the least intervallum of time , or any space or respit in the world to take any rest .

Mans life is a warre-fare vpon earth , there is no certainty therein ; no settled Mans life , what it is . assurance , no estate that is permanent ; no pleasure that is perfect ; no content that is true ; but all is counterfeit and vaine . Wilt thou see , that this is true ? Then hearken to that which I shall tell thee .

The great god Iupiter ( for so the Poets faigne him ) hauing created all things vpon earth ; and man to be the enioyer of them , commanded the god Content , to reside in the world , not beleeuing , nor preuenting the ingratitude , which afterwards they fell into , following their owne proper pleasures and delights , and bearing themselues in a high and proud fashion : for hauing this god continuing amongst them , they did not so much as thinke on any other . To him they did sacrifice , to him they offered their oblations , his name they celebrated with ioy ; and to him onely did they sing Songs of prayse and thanksgiuing . Iupiter scorning this contempt , and being mightily offended A morall Fable of the gods of old-time , and the Councel that was held in heauen against Mankind . with man for this strange neglect , called a Councell of the gods ; and when they were all assembled together , he made vnto them a long Discourse , wherin he informed them , of the euill Correspondence which man held with him , for that they did onely adore Content , as their true god ; not considering the benefits which they had receiued from his prodigall hand , being meerely his workmanship , and by him created of nothing . And that therefore they should deliuer their Opinions , what order was to be taken , for the redressing of so foule an abuse ; and what Medicines to be applied for the curing of this their madnesse .

Some of the milder gods , out of their tender hearts , and mercifull natures , spake thus vnto Iupiter :

Man , you know , is but a weake kind of creature , framed of a frayle and brittle matter , a corruptible substance , soone dissolu'd and turn'd to nothing ; and therefore we thinke it fit , that they should be holpen and held vp by vs , and that we should yeeld them our succour and assistance in all that we can : For , if it were possible , that we could exchange fortunes with them , and were in the same state and condition as they are , and euery way equall with them , I doubt me , we should do iust as they do . And therefore we are not to make any great reckoning of the matter : but if we doe , and that they must be proceeded against , we for our parts are verily perswaded , that some mild and gentle correction will be a sufficient remedy for the present .

Momus would faine haue spoke his mind , and his tongue itch't to bee let loose , hauing already entred into some free language , and would haue lash't out farther , had he not beene commanded to hold his peace , and to forbeare till it came to his turne , and then he should haue a full hearing . Hee would gladly haue taken hold on that occasion , to haue incensed Iupiter , because it did so fairely offer it selfe vnto him : but obeying for the present , he meditated in the meane while on a long Oration , which he meant should make for his purpose , when it came to his turne to speake . Howbeit , there were not some wanting in the interim , of equall ( almost ) condition with himselfe , and of the same humour , who stood vp and said :

It is not fit ( great god of Heauen ) to leaue so heynous a fault vnpunished : for the offence is infinit , being committed against so infinit a Maiestie ; and therefore the punishment ought likewise to be infinit . Our opinion is , that they should be vtterly destroyed , and made an end of at once , and neuer to haue any more of them created anew ; for there is no necessity at all of their being and liuing in the world , but may very well be spared . others would not agree to that motion , but did hold it fit , that great store of Thunder-bolts , with fearfull flashes of Lightning , should be throwne downe vpon them , and consume them all ; and that others more good should be created a-new .

Thus as they were deliuering their opinions , being more or lesse rigorous , according to their seuerall qualities and complexions , till it came to Apollo's turne to speake , who crauing leaue of the House , and their fauour obtained , in a graue voice , and with a cheerefull countenance , he thus exprest himselfe :

Supreme Scepter-swaying Iupiter , highest amongst the gods , both in power , Apollo's speech in mans fauour . and in pitie : That grieuous accusation , wherewith thou chargest Man , is so iust , that we can not gaine-say , or contradict any vengeance , which thou shalt take of them . Yet withall , I can not ( out of that great respect which I beare vnto thee ) but vtter what I thinke , and plainly to shew vnto thee , what I haue conceiued in my minde , my words being as free from passion , as I hope they shall be from offence .

If thou destroy the world , in vaine then are those things , which thou hast therein created ; and it were imperfection in thee , to vn-make that , which thou hast already made ; only for to mend that which thou now findest amisse : Much lesse , would I haue thee to repent thy selfe that thou hast made Man ; for that will be but to discredit thy selfe and thine owne worke . Besides , how can it stand with the power and goodnesse of a Creator , to take too strict a course against his Creature , and to exceed , by extraordinary meanes , in his chastisements ?

To destroy these that are now liuing , and to create others a-new , I hold that not so fit to be done by thee . For thou must either giue them , or not giue them free-will : if thou giue them it , they must necessarily then be such manner of men , as their fore-fathers were : If thou not giue it them , they shall not be men : And so thou shalt haue created in vaine that so great and glorious a frame of Heauen , Earth , Starres , Moone , Sunne , together with the composition of the Elements , and millions more of things , which thou hast made in so exact a manner , and such a singular perfection . So that ( which importeth your seruice , if you will be pleased to take it into consideration ) there remaineth but one thing to be done to set all right againe , without seeking for any other remedy ; or that you shall be driuen to vse any violent or rigorous proceeding against them , to the preiudice of your clemencie .

Thou ( O Iupiter ) gau'st them the God Content , whom they were to haue with them as long as it pleased thee , and no longer : for vpon thy will and pleasure , all things both in Heauen and earth haue their dependency . Now , had they beene so wise , that they could haue continued thankefull towards thee , and haue conserued themselues in iustice and obedience towards thee , it had been a thing repugnant to the goodnesse of thy nature and iustice , not to vphold and protect them , by inlarging thy fauours towards them , and multiplying thy blessings vpon them . But since they haue dis-merited this by disobedience , thou oughtest in some sort to punish them . For it is not fit , that they should in tyrannous manner , & with a strong hand possesse these so great blessings , to offend thee thereby : But thou oughtest rather to take this their god from them , and in his stead to send downe his brother Discontent amongst them , who is very like in fauour vnto him , and doth resemble him so neere , that a man can hardly discerne the one from the other . And so by this meanes , they will euer hereafter come to acknowledge their own misery , and thy mercy ; thy happy estate , and their owne wretched condition ; thy ease , and their trouble ; their paine , and thy glory ; thy power , and their owne weakenesse . And then , as thou shalt see cause , thou maist distribute thy fauours to those that shall deserue them ; and according to thy louing kindnesse recompence euery man according to thine owne good will and pleasure , not making thy benefits alike common to the good and the bad , by suffering all men equally to enioy one and the same happinesse . This course being taken with them , I am of opinion , that it will not onely be a sufficient punishment vnto them ; but will also bring them to a due acknowledgement of their errour . I haue spoke my minde and shall now leaue it vnto thee ( thou mercyimbracing Iupiter ) to doe that herein which shall sute best with thine owne good liking , and shall make most for thy seruice .

With this briefe aduice , he ended his Oration . Then Momus , with his Momus mans ancient enemy . venemous tongue , began to lay about him ; labouring to exaggerate the offence , and to set it forth in its vilest colours , induced thereunto not so much for goodnesse sake , as that inueterated hatred which he euermore bare vnto mankinde . But notice being taken of his passion ( which was a knowne disease in him ) his opinion was reproued , and cryde downe by the generall voice of that highest Court of Parliament : All commending the motion that was made by Apollo . The execution of whose speech was ( with an vnanimous Mercury , by order from loue , desc●…nds on earth , and to what end . consent ) committed to Mercury : Who presently ( spreading his wings , and breaking with them through the ayre ) descended downe vpon the earth , where he found the men of this world with their god , Content , feeding and making merry together , doing him all the honour they could deuise , being farre from any the least thought , that this their god should ( while the world indured ) be alienated from their possession .

Mercury came to this god , where he was ; and hauing in secret deliuered the Embassage vnto him , sent from the gods aboue , was ( though sore against his will ) inforced to yeeld thereunto . The men were herevpon in an vprore , and sought to hinder it all they could , and began with might and maine to interest themselues in the cause ; and seeing that there was no remedy , but that this their god must be taken away from them , they stroue to defend him with all the strength they could make ; and taking strong hold of him , they tugged hard for him , as desirous to retaine him still amongst them .

Iupiter perceiuing how the world went , and what a coyle they kept about him , came downe amongst them , and whilest these men were busied in laying fast hold on his cloathes , ( vsing a pretty slight ) he cunningly conuay'd away Content from amidst his cloathes , leauing them Discontent in his stead , with the same cloathes , and the very same habit of raiment , wherewith Content was at that time apparelled , taking him from thence away with him to heauen . Wherewith the men that were in this broyle were very well pleased ( though thus deceiued ) thinking that they had preuailed in their purpose , and obtained what they desired , since they had their god still amongst them : But it was not so well with them , as they thought it to be .

This errour of those former times ( the same deceit yet liuing still amongst them ) hath continued euen to this present age . Men did thinke that Content remained stil with them , and that they had him sure inough heere vpon earth . But it is nothing so ; for it is onely the bare raiment , and outward shape and resemblance , which they inioy with them ; and Discontent , clapt into his cloathes . And if thou beleeue otherwise , or conceiu'st the contrary , thou art wide of the truth , and a meere stranger thereunto . Wilt thou , that I make this plaine vnto thee ? Marke well then what I shall say vnto thee .

Weigh and consider with thy selfe , in any kinde of manner thou thy selfe shalt deuise : the Feasts , the Sports , the Bankets , the Musicks , all the delights and ioyes , and whatsoeuer else may most moue thy inclination to the highest point of all , which thine owne desire can suggest and paint forth vnto thee to the life . If I shall aske thee by the way , Whither goest thou ? Thou wilt answere me perhaps , and that very proudly : To such a feast of Content . I giue it for granted , that there thou doest receiue it , and that the place doth affoord it thee ; the Gardens being fresh and full of flowers ; the Riuers plated with their siluer-streames , and that the Fountaines distilling their drops of pearle , may much cheere and glad thy heart . I suppose that thou hast banketed thy selfe in sweet and pleasant Arbours , where neither the Sunne did offend thee , nor the ayre annoy thee . And that thou didst inioy thy desires to their full height , & that thou hadst all the sports & pastimes that a man could wish . Yet notwithstanding , there is no contentment so absolute in this world , which is not watred with some sorrow . And though in all these things thou hadst no distaste at all giuen thee ; but hadst euery thing according to thine owne mind : yet when thou returnest home to thine own house ; or layest thee down in thy bed to take thy rest it is not possible but thou shalt find thy selfe weary , dusty & sweaty , to haue lost thy stomake , or taken cold , to grow heauy , melancholly , and sad ; and peraduenture become either mad , or dead . For amidst our greatest pleasures , happen the greatest misfortunes : And are vsually wont to be vnto vs Vespers of feare , and of horrour ; and not Vespers , where the night passeth merrily away from the beginning to the middle , and from the middle to the end : for in the midst of this thy idolatry , all shall bee taken from thee . Set not thy heart therefore vpon them ; but slight them , and let them goe by , as if thou didst not know them : for there is no trust to be had in them .

Now , by this time , ( I doubt not ) but thou wilt ingenuously confesse , that this disguise did deceiue thee , these cloathes coozen thee , and this maske so blinde thy eye-sight ; That whereas thou didst verily thinke , that thou hadst Content now safe inough in thy hands , thou hadst nothing more but his outward raiment ; and in it , Discontent . Now doest thou see , how there is no Content vpon the earth ; and that our true Content is onely in Heauen . And True content is in heauen . therefore , till thou meet with it there ; doe not looke for it heere .

When I resolued on my departure , ( O good God ) what a deale of content did represent it selfe vnto me ? Me thought , the very thought of it wrought wonderfully vpon me , apprehending no happinesse to be equall vnto this . With these eyes of my imagination , I beheld onely Aprill , and the beauty of the Fields in that season ; not so much as once thinking on the August , that The strange alterations in this world . was to come after : As if I were to suffer nothing , and had been made of some impossible substance , that could not be subiect to perturbations ; or these foolish crosses of the world . Those long and euen wayes , I conceited as things , that I was not to goe ; at least , not to be wearied with them . To eate and drinke at your Innes , and other the like vittailing houses , ( as one that did not know what kinde of Vermine , these bloud-suckers were , ) I thought they would haue giuen me my meat for nothing ; or if they did take money for it , that it would haue beene much better then what you haue heard me tell you . The variety and greatnesse of things ; as Birds , Beasts , Mountaines , Woods , Cities , and whatsoeuer was inhabited with people , as if I had them all already in my hand , all did figure forth vnto me content , and nothing but content ; but could not finde it in any thing , but in a good and honest life .

I did frame in the fabricke of my braine , Castles of Content , and that all things should succeed prosperously with me , and that where-soeuer I came , I should meet with my Mother , that should make much of me , and my Maid , that should make me vnready , and bring my supper to bed to mee , and that should helpe me on in the morning with my cloathes , and fetch me my breakfast . Good God , who would thinke , that the world were so large and so long as it is ? I had seene it in some Maps , and me thought it was all plaine and smooth , and huddled ( as it seemed there to be ) all together , without any great either difference , or distance . I did not imagine , there could haue been Insipientis est di●…cte non putatem . so many troubles , and so many miseries in it . But to say , I neuer thought it , is a thing that betrayes a man to haue lineally descended of a race of Coxcombs , it is a property , that belongs onely vnto fooles ; it is the excuse of rude and ignorant Asses , the childs helpe , and the carelesse mans refuge . For he that is wise and discreet , ought euer to thinke on things afore-hand , to fore-cast the worst ; and to preuent a mischiefe before it come .

But I did like a simple Youth , ( as I was ) hauing neither wit nor gouernment in me ; and therefore I was iustly punished , for that liuing so at ease as I did ; and being as it were in Paradise , I would goe abroad into the world ; and like my first fore-fathers , could not see when I was well , but I know not out of what vaine humour , must goe seeke after the knowledge of good , and ill . How many things began I then to call to minde , when I came out of the Inne without my Cloake , and was not onely coozened , but made a common laughing stocke , to as many as lookt vpon me ! I , would faine haue then beene feeding on the flesh-pots of Egypt : O how I did long to be at home againe ! But ( as the saying is ) elbien , hasta que se pierde , no se conoçe . Man knowes not Magis carendo , quàm fruendo , &c. what happinesse is , till he want it .

We were all sad and heauy , and iogged on along in a sullen and melancholy kinde of fashion ; and now my honest Carrier was no more so full of his laughing , as he was before ; the winde was laid in that corner , by the tricke that mine Host had put vpon him . Before , he threw stones on my house top , thinking to breake the Tyles , and cracke my Roofe : but when hee found his owne to be made of glasse , he left his flinging , with-drew his hand , and kept himselfe quiet . It is lesse ill , and more discretion to consider with a mans Morall lessons . selfe , before he speake , what he may chance to heare ; and before that he doe a wrong , whether it may be returned vpon himselfe , or no ? It is not good for a man to thrust himselfe wilfully into danger . For when a man shall take too much liberty to himselfe ; he shall finde a tongue for a tongue , and a hand for a hand . All things haue their equall measure ; like doe , like haue : And he that will be honoured of all , must honour all .

If it enter not ( yet at least it ought ) into thy consideration , that what thou hast said or done in secret , either shall , or may be pu●…shed by some one or other to the world , and that thou maist meet with such a one , that either in word , or in deed , may reply that vnto thee , which thou wouldst not willingly heare , and lesse indure : Doe not stand vpon thy strength , nor rely too much on thine owne might : For though thy affront be not written in thy fore-head ; yet will it be made knowne to all the world . Doe not make those thy enemies , whom with good vsage thou maist make thy friends . For it is not good to haue any enemy at all , though neuer so weake . For from a little sparke , ariseth oftentimes a great flame . What thing 's so faire and beautifull in it selfe ; what more worthy wise-men ; what more befitting braue spirits and valiant Gentlemen ; then to measure their action by the rule of reason , to bridle and reine in their passions , and to carry an euen hand in all that they doe ; to the end that they may not act any thing vn-aduisedly , and put themselues vpon extremities ? Doest thou not see , how the world is now altred with our Carrier ? He was now as silent as the night , not a word that comes from him . He laughs no more , but hangs downe his head in his bosome , not daring for shame to lift it vp . Our good honest Clergy-men rode mumbling their Mattins to themselues ; I was thinking on mine owne mis-fortunes : and when all and euery one of vs were as it were in a wood , euen in the thickest of all our contemplations , ( euery man thinking vpon his owne businesse ) two Ministers of iustice , with their Officers at their heeles , came in pursuit of a Page , that had stolne from his Master great store of money and iewels . And by the markes that were giuen them ; it should seeme it was Guzman apprehended for a Thiefe , and his sufferings . such another strippling as my selfe . They had no sooner spide me , but they cryde out aloud : Ah thou thiefe , haue we caught thee ? wee haue thee safe enough now , thou canst not escape our hands : And presently hereupon they strooke me off the Asse ( my brother ) with their Fists ; and when they had me downe , laying fast hold on me , they fell a searching mee , thinking to haue found the stolne-goods about me .

They tooke off the Pack-saddles , searched the Pannels , leauing not so much Sergeants and Catch-poles , an vnciuill kind of people . roome , as you may put a pins-head betweene , which they did not narrowly pry into : and when they could find nothing there , then they beganne to exclaime , and cry out vpon me ; Ah , thou thiefe , confesse and tell vs the truth ; for we will hang thee here presently , if thou delay vs any longer . They would not heare me , nor admit of any excuse I could make for my selfe ; and in despight of the world , without any other cause giuen , ( saue their own selfe-will and opinion ) I , and no other man , must needs be the fellow . They gaue me many blowes , thumpes on the brest , boxes on the eare with the backes of their hands , and many other outrages , wherewith they tormented Mans depraued disposition , what effects it worketh . me , and all , that I might not be suffered by them to speake for myselfe , and to pronounce something in mine owne defence . And although it did much grieue me , to see how ill I was vsed by them , yet I could not choose but laugh to my selfe , for that my companion was worse dealt withall ; laying more load and harder blowes vpon him , than me , as a receiuer and concealer of this theft , and that he was my partner and sharer therein .

Doest thou not here perceiue the peruerse inclination of men , who haue scarce any feeling of their owne miseries , when they see those of their enemies , to be greater then their owne ? I was not halfe Cater-cousins with him , because by his meanes , I had lost my Cloake , and sup't vpon a Mule . And therefore I did beare mine owne hurt the better , because hee suffered somewhat more than my selfe . They did beat him without mercy ; they had no pitie of him in the world , but were still bawlling vpon him , that hee should discouer , whither he had carried these goods ? and to what secret place hee had conueyd them ?

The poore man that was as innocent as my selfe , and as free from any such fault , as the child that is new borne , did not know in the world what to doe . He thought at first that they had beene but in iest with him ; but when he saw they were in earnest , and past so farre beyond the bounds of sport , and that it was now no longer a iesting matter , * * A Prouerbe . He curst the dead to the diuell , & all those that should but shed a teare for him . This sport did nothing please him , and wisht by this time with all his heart , that he had neuer seene mee . The Gowne ( as they say ) was now brusht cleane , not a specke to bee seene ; all was vnfolded , and searched ouer and ouer , but nothing at all to bee found : and though the theft appeared not , yet the rigour of their punishing ceased not : But as if they had the Law in their owne hands , or had beene to fit vpon vs as our lawfull Iudges , they did vse vs most cruelly both in word and deed : perhaps it was giuen them so in charge amongst other their instructions . Now they being weary with punching vs , and wee with suffering it , they began to bind our hands , and pinion our armes , to carry vs backe with them to Seuill .

Let it be in thy Letany , that God would deliuer thee from committing any offence against these three Holy's ; The holy a a The holy Inquisition is well knowne to the world , what seuere courses they take . The seuerest and cruellest Officers that are in all Spaine . What base and vile people , are the Sergeants and Catch-poles . Inquisition , the holy b b Hermandad , in Castile is a certaine Tribunall , that hath a great Iurisdiction , and punisheth the fautls comitted in the fields , which hath great prerogatiues and exemptions from the kings of Spaine : And is in that respect amongst them , that it is styled by the name of Santa , or holy . Hermandad , and the holy c c The Cruzada is an Indulgence which the Popes granted to those , that went to conquer the Holy-Land , which is now granted to the King of Spaine , by way of Subsidie against Infidels and Heretickes , giuing some finall almes towards so pious a worke . Crusada : But if thou bee faulty , then pray , That the Lord would deliuer thee from the holy Hermandad : for the other Holy's , hauing ( as they haue ) vpright Iudges , men of truth , knowledge , and Conscience ; their Ministers notwithstanding and vnder-Officers , are of a different condition . And your Sergeants and Catch-poles belonging to the holy Hermandad , are in the generall , a kind of most lewd and wicked people ; men without Soules , and not worthy to be spoken of , or named amongst honest men . And very many of them , for a very little matter , will not sticke to sweare that against thee , which thou neuer didst , nor they neuer saw , more then the money which they tooke , to beare false witnesse against thee , ( vnlesse thou bestow the wine vpon them , or otherwise content them , by greasing their fist . ) They are in conclusion , of a rascall kind of race ; very Varlets , Buckle-bosomes , Collar-catchers : in a word , they are Sergeants , and Catch-poles ; and so by consequence , theeues , passants , or but an Ace lesse ; and ( as we shall tell you hereafter ) those that rob the Common-wealth where-soeuer they come , as if they had a Commission for these their open thefts . And now ( my honest Sergeant ) me thinkes I heare thee mutter , that I speake amisse ; telling mee , that thou ( for thy part ) art a very honest man , and dost exercise thy Office well , without abuse vnto any . I confesse as much , and say , that thou art such an one , and that I know thee to be so . But tell me , my friend , ( and let vs speake it in secret betweene our selues , that no body may heare vs ) doest not thou know , ( and confesse ingenuously ) that this is truth which I speake of thy fellowes ? if thou knowst as much , ( as thou canst not choose ) and that it is so indeed ; I talke to them , and not to thee .

Now had we quite lost our Clergy-men , we shooke hands with them at the first , who walked afoot their way , and we ours . Shall I tell you , what I thought with my selfe ? if you will giue me the hearing , I will . Trust me , all the blowes that I receiued , nay , Death it selfe , would not haue beene halfe so grieuous vnto me , as to see my selfe brought backe againe , in this manner to mine owne Countrey , if their resolution had held : if they had carried me to any place , where I was vnknowne to it , and it vnto me , it had not beene a Pins-poynt matter . I should haue set light by it , and cast it at my heele , especially considering , that in the end I must be set at libertie , and come off cleare ; and that the truth would at last shew it selfe , and make it knowne to the world that I was not the man , they took me to be . We were drawn along like dogges in a paire of couples , afflicted in that manner as thou mayst imagine , ( if euer the like misfortune should happen vnto thee . ) I know not how it came to passe , ( but so it was ) that one amongst the rest lookt stedfastly vpon me , and said to one that was by him ; How now , what 's this ? I feare mee we haue taken our marke amisse , and through our too much haste , haue run into an errour . The other answered ; Why thinke you so ? Hee replide ; Doe not you know , that he ; whom we are to seeke after , wants his left Thumbe ; and this Youth you see , is sound in that part ? Whereupon they went to read their a a Requisitoria is a Iudges Warrant to another , wherein he requireth him to execute his command . Guzman , set free . Requisitoria , which did set downe the markes , whereby they should know him , and they found they had beene deceiued almost in euery one of them . But questionlesse , they had a great desire to beat some-body , and so fell vpon him that came first to hand . Presently thereupon , they vn-pinion'd vs , and loosed our hands , and crauing pardon , that they were so much mistaken , they went their way , and left vs soundly payd for our paines ; taking some few b b The Spanish word Quarto , is a kind of brasse coyne , whereof foure make 3. pence . Quarto's of the Carrier , for the sight of the Commission , to moysten their mouthes herewith , at the next Inne that they should light on .

No ay mal tan malo , de que no resulte algo bueno .

There is no ill so bad , from whence there doth not arise some good . If they had not stolne my Cloake from me , by hauing that vpon my backe , they would not haue perceiued , whether I had beene sound of my thumbes , or no ? But had it so falne out , that they should haue come to know any such thing by me , it had come so out of season , that rather then I would haue confest the fact , I would haue first indured a thousand torments . In euery thing I had very good fortune . My money spent , my Cloake stolne , my belly hungry , Guzmans good fortune what is was . my cheekes buffeted , my necke out of ioynt , and my teeth bathed in blood , with the bobs on my nose , and the dashes that they gaue mee on the mouth . My Companion , if he were not worse , was no lesse ill intreated then my selfe . And when they had vs'd vs both thus hardly , to make vs amends , they cry vs mercy , saying ; That we are not the men . I pray marke , what a pretty kind of pardon this was , and in what good time it came : first , they fall a beating of vs , before they examine vs ; and when they haue almost maimed vs , to make vs amends , forsooth , they aske vs forgiuenesse .

The Clergy-men were now neere at hand , we presently ouertake them ; they blest themselues when they saw vs . But I vp and told them , what was the cause of our liberty ; for my Companion was so bang'd about the chappes , that he durst not dare to speake , for feare he should spit out his grinders .

Euery one got vpon his Asse , and we began to spurre on , but not with our heeles ; because with them we were not able to reach to our Saddle-skirts . And I assure you in good faith , it were a world to tell you , what a bargaine we had of it ; how the Faire went , and what a market we made of it .

Then said the younger of the two Clerkes ; No more of this ( my friends ) it is enough . That we may forget part of these sorrowes past , and intertaine the way with some merriment ; when my Companion hath ended his a a The Clergy-men in Spaine , when they trauell on the way , haue certaine set prayers to say . Deuotion , I shall relate a Story vnto you ; much whereof happened in Seuill . We tooke it all as a fauour ; and the other hauing now ended his Orizons , attending this Discourse with a deepe silence , and an earnest desire , wee lookt still when he should begin .

CHAP. VIII . Wherein Guzman de Alfarache relateth the Story of those two Louers , Ozmin and Daraxa .

THE ARGVMENT .

How Ferdinand and Isabell , King & Queene of Spaine , tooke Baça , a Citty of the Moores , wherein Daraxa a beautifull and noble Damozell was taken prisoner , whom Queene Isabell brought with her to Seuill , and there left her in the custodie of Don Luys de Padilla . And how Ozmin a young Gentleman well descended , and inamoured of that Lady , after he had suffered long sicknesse for the imprisonment of his faire Daraxa , went to the said City ; together with the diuers accidents that happened to them both .

AS soone as they had mumbled vp their prayers , ( which they quickly dispatch't ) they shut their Prayer-bookes , and putting them in their Alforjas , ( which is a kind of Wallet ) all of vs giuing diligent eare vnto him , the good Priest began his promised History after this manner :

The Catholike Kings Don Ferdinand , and Donna Isabella , being at the Siege of Baça , it was so well fought on both sides , ( being as brauely defended , as it was valiantly assaulted ) that for a long time it was not knowne which side had the better , or where the aduantage was like to fall , ( Fortune had so equally spred her wings . ) For albeit , the Kings Forces were the greater , and did exceed the other in number of men ; yet the Moores ( being likewise many ) were wonderfully strengthened by the good disposition of the situation of that City .

The Queene Donna Isabell remained in Iaen , making prouision of all things necessary for the Campe . And the King Don Ferdinand went foorth in person to supply the Army ; which hee diuided into two parts : In the one he planted his Ordinance , recommending the care thereof to the Marquesses of Cadiz , and Aquila , to Luys Fernandez Portocarrero , Lord of Palma , and to the Commendadores of Alcantara and Calatrana , besides other Captaines and Souldiers . In the other himselfe was incamped , accompanied with the chiefe of his Nobilitie and Gentry , and most experienced men of Armes ; so hedging in the Citie on euery side , that it seemed as a Center in the midst of a large Circle .

The two Campes lay some halfe League the one from the other , if the compasse had runne right ; but because their passage was stopt , they beleaguerd the other halfe along by the mountaine ; and by this meanes were distanced one from the other a League or thereabouts : and because they could hardly succour one another , they agreed ( the Councell of Warre hauing so thought it fit ) to make certaine Trenches and Castles ; which the King in his owne person did often visit . And albeit the Moores did labour by all meanes possible , to hinder this designe , yet the Christians made good their Worke , valiantly defending what they had vndertaken ; there being not a day that past ouer their heads , wherein there were not two or three ( if not more ) skirmishes that past betweene them ; many on both sides being both hurt and slaine . But because the worke , ( being a thing of so great importance ) should not cease vpon those that wrought thereon , a sufficient Gard did continually attend both night and day : it happened , that Don Rodrigo , and Don Hortado de Mendonça , Adelantado of Caçorla , and Don Sancho de Castilla , beeing of the Gard ; the King commanded them to make good that place , till that the Condees of Cabra , and Urenna , and the Marquesse of Astorga should enter with their Regiments for a certaine exploit that was to be put in execution . The Moores , who ( as hath beene said ) were very watchfull , seeking to disturbe the worke , descended from the top of the mountaine with some 3000. Foot , and 400. Horse , and set vpon Don Rodrigo de Mendonça . The Adelantado and Don Sancho began the fight with them ; and now the battell growing hot betweene them , the Moores were relieued by many other that sallied out of the City . King Ferdinand being there present , and seeing how things went , commanded the Condee de Tendilla , that he should assaile them on the other side , so that the battell by this time grew very bloody on both sides .

The King then seeing the streight wherein the Condee was , and that hee was wounded , manfully fighting against the Moores , he gaue order to the Master de Santiago to assist with his forces on the one side , and to the Marquesse of Cadiz , the Duke of Nagera , and the Comendadors of Calatraua , and to Françisco de Bouadilla , that they should charge them with their troopes , where the Artillery was planted . The Moores thereupon drew foorth another third Squadron against them , and it was brauely fought on both sides , as well by the Moores as the Christians . And the King being himselfe in this conflict , discouered by those of his Campe , they armed with all the haste they could , and went foorth to ayde him . And so thicke were the Troopes of those that came to succour him , that the Moores being vnable any longer to make resistance , betooke themselues to flight , the Christians still hauing them in chase , making great slaughter of them ; pursuing them euen to the very suburbes of the Citie ; whereinto many of the Souldiers entred , and got rich pillage ; taking some of the principall persons prisoners ; in which number was Daraxa , a Moorish Damosell , the onely daughter of the Alcalde of that Fort. Her beauty was her owne , and the most perfect one , that euer eye had seene : her yeeres were rather shorter , then full seuenteene ; being so well growne in the bud , that she was now ready for the blowing . And beeing in this true height of excellencie , as is here set downe , it was raised much the higher by her discretion , grauity , and gracefull carriage : She spake Spanish so well , that a man that had not knowne her , would haue taken her to haue beene an old Christian : for she might haue past amongst those that speake the purest Language .

The King did highly esteeme of this Lady , accounting of her as of a iewell of great price . And therefore sent her as a treasure to the Queene his Wife , who made no lesse reckning of her , receiuing her very graciously , as well for her owne desert and worth , for that she was of principall ranke and qualitie , being descended of Kings , and the daughter of so honourable a person ; as also for to try whether she might be a meanes to make the Citie to yeeld , without farther fight , and shedding of bloud . Whereupon she treated her with all kindnesse , and the best vsage shee could deuise , farre exceeding the fashion of those her other Ladies , which were neerest about her person . So that , not as a Captiue , but as a Kinswoman , she entertained her in the kindest manner that could be , greatly desiring , that such an excellent piece of nature as she was , and where such surpassing beauty did possesse the body , there the soule might not with fowle Paganisme be sullied and defiled . These were sufficient reasons of themselues to haue her still in her sight , besides the content she receiued in talking and conuersing with her . For shee was able to giue her so good an account of the state of the whole Country , and of euery particular passage in those warres ( though she were but of yong and tender yeeres ) as if she had been of maturer age , and the wisest Counsellor in the Kingdom . And albeit the King and Queene hapned afterwards to meet in Baça , ( that Citie being rendred vp into their hands vpon certaine conditions ) yet the Queene would neuer suffer Daraxa to be from her side , for that great affection which she bare vnto her , promising the Alcalde her father , to doe her many particular fauours . Her absence did much grieue him : but the loue which he saw their Catholike Maiesties bare vnto her , did somwhat lessen his sorrow , conceiuing that much honour and profit would redound vnto her thereby : And so rested himselfe contented , and pocketed vp his griefe in silence . The Queene ( as I told you ) would neuer be without her , and at length carried her along with her vnto Seuill ; where , out of the desire shee had to winne her to be a Christian , for to dispose her thereunto by little and by little , vsing no violent , but tractable meanes ; she tooke her one day aside , and said thus vnto her :

Thou canst not by this time ( Daraxa ) but truely vnderstand how well I affect thee , and the great desire I haue had to giue thee content : In requitall whereof , I shall intreat thee for my sake to grant me one request ; which is , that thou wilt exchange this attire thou now wearest , and put on such cloathes as I shall inuest thee withall , appertaining to mine owne person ; and to weare , and enioy them , being that thy beauty will be much aduantaged by this habit of ours .

Daraxa mildly made answere ; I shall willingly performe , what your Maiesty shall be pleased to command me . For , by obeying you herein , ( if there be any discretion in mee , or any consideration of worth in this my weake apprehension , ) I shall from this day forward thinke the better of it , and hold it for good , for doubtlesse it cannot be otherwise , but that these your Maiesties ornaments will adde a grace to my imperfections , and your rich dressings supply my poore defects .

Daraxa ( replide the Queene ) it is not your modesty that can make you derogate from your selfe . For if euer Nature made a perfect worke , shee sum'd it all vp in thy selfe . But not to insist vpon the praise of that , which can not sufficiently be expressed , we graciously accept of this your seruice , and the willing tender you make thereof vnto vs .

Now was Daraxa apparelled after the Spanish fashion , residing certaine dayes in the Palace , till such time as their Catholike Maiesties departed from thence , to goe to the siege of Granada . And therefore as well for the troubles that attend the Warres ; as also that she might take some sauour in the things of our Faith , the Queene thought it fit to leaue her in the house of Don Luys de Padilla ( a man of quality and a Fauourite ) where shee might entertaine her selfe with Donna Eluira de Guzman , his Daughter and a Virgin ; to whom was giuen in charge , the care of her entertainment , with expresse order to vse her with all respect ; and that shee should want nothing that might giue her content . And albeit she were accordingly receiued by them , being feasted and courted with all the pleasures that place could affoord ; yet it grieued her much to see her selfe so farre from her natiue home , besides other causes , which gaue her much more discontent , but those shee did not discouer ; for with a cheerefull countenance , and a pleasant semblance , shee made show , that seeing it was her Maiesties pleasure so to dispose of her , that shee did esteeme it as a fauour ; and so did expresse it in her lookes and gesture .

This Damsell , her Parents had betrothed to a Moorish Gentleman of Granada , whose name was Ozmin : whose qualitie and condition , together with his disposition , was in all points sutable to that of Daraxa . Hee was young , rich , of a sweet behauiour , personable , discreet , and aboue all very valiant , and full of courage , and euery one of these parts well adapted , and disposed to receiue many other , which as they were fit for him , so they did well become him . Besides , he was so dextrous in the Spanish tongue , as if hee had been bred vp in the heart of Casiile , and a naturall of that Countrey : ( it being a thing as worthy commendation in vertuous young men , as it is a glory to those parents , who breed vp their children in the knowledge of tongues , and exercise of Armes . ) He lou'd his espoused Lady with all the tendernesse that a Louer could , insomuch that hee did ( in a manner ) commit idolatry , out of the reuerence and respect that he bare vnto her ; and would ( might hee be suffered so to doe ) haue set vp her Statua vpon the highest Altars . On her , hee did wholly imploy his memory ; for her all his sences kept continuall watch and ward , and his will was more hers , then his owne : Nor was his Spouse ( who was made all of thankefulnesse ) any whit his debtor . Their loue was as equall , as was their qualitie , and their affection did truely correspond with their euen condition . But surpassing all the rest , was that most honest course of life ; wherein they conserued themselues . The sweetnesse of those discourses which by Letters passed betweene them , those louely messages which were sent to and fro each to other , can not be indeered according to their true desert . They had visited & seen one another very often , but neuer treated of loue mouth to mouth . But their speaking eyes parled many times , when their tongues were silent , which neuer omitted the occasion to talke together . For both of them many yeeres before , and yet not very many , because they were both but young , but to speake more properly , had euen from their child-hood loued and visited each other at their pleasure . The parents were knit in so perfect a friendship , and their children in such streight knots of the fastest loue , that to make this harmony the fuller , they did all desire to be neerer linked ( if possibly it might be ) by a strong Alliance : And by this marriage it had taken effect , had it not , when all was in a manner concluded , beene crost in an vnlucky houre , and by the rigour of some austere Planet , when Baça was besieged .

But vpon this reuolution of things , and these warlike commotions , it was thought fit to deferre it for a while , wayting for a more conuenient time , wherein their marriage might be solemnized with greater mirth and iollitie , and such triumphs and feastings performed , as the youthfulnesse and qualification required of so sweet and louely a couple ; and seemed necessarily to suit with the estimation and greatnesse of both their parents .

You haue heard already who Daraxa's Father was : Her Mother was her owne Kinswoman , daughter to a Sister of Boabdelin , King of that Citie , who had treated this Match betweene them . And Ozmin was cousin German to Mahomet , King of Granada , sur-named The Little . Now that all these faire designes , had contrary successe to their desires , and that Fortune had bent her browe against them , Daraxa remaining now in the power of those their Catholike Maiesties ; and being left behind in Seuill , as soone as Ozmin heard of it , the exclamations that he made ; the sorrowes which hee vttered ; the sighs which he vented , ( as they were the true Heralds that proclaimed his hearts-griefe ; ) so did they moue all men to compassion , who could not choose but share , ( and that in no small measure ) with him , when they saw such lamentable effects of his great affliction .

But because the losse was so solely his , and the wound put so home to his very heart and soule , sorrow did so seaze vpon him , that in a short time it tooke hold vpon his manly ( yet delicate ) body : so that all the whole frame thereof was out of temper , and fell at last into a grieuous sicknesse , as dangerous and difficill to be cured , as the remedy was distant , and the cause vnknowne . The effects whereof dayly increased with mortall signes of death , because the cause increased ; and the medicines that were ministred vnto him , being not rightly applyed , did him no good at all . And which is the worst in maladies , the Physicians did not truely apprehend the nature of his disease , being the most essentiall point , for the restoring of a man to his former state of health . So that his afflicted Parents , despairing of his recouery , had now rendred vp all hope of life ; and the Physicians , they had giuen him ouer , being of opinion , that it was impossible hee should liue ; their iudgement being strengthned and confirmed by all those accidents which did ioyntly concurre , and openly expresse themselues , in this his painfull torment .

But when this sicke Louer was treading the last step of life , that he had to goe , and euen entring into the doores of Death ; a conceit came sodainly into his head , which representing it selfe to his imagination , wrought so effectually with him , that he seemed to draw some fruit from it , and to be somewhat better then he was : And though his sicknesse were yet still full of danger , yet compared with that miserable estate wherein hee stood before , the amendment could not for the time be greater . And out of the longing desire that he had to put that in execution , which his conceit had formerly entertained , plotting in his imagination , how he might come to get a sight of his beloued Spouse , he gained breath , and grew somewhat stronger , stoutly resisting those things , that might hinder his intent .

Whereupon he licenced his sorrowes , and shooke hands with melancholly , taking his leaue of them both , bidding them fare-well for euer , and did now wholly intend his health ; and by this meanes beganne by degrees to grow better and better , cleane contrary to the expectation of those , who had seene how low hee was brought , and in what a desperate estate hee was .

True is that old Adage , Desire subdueth feare , trampleth on the neck of inconueniences , and leuelleth all difficulties , be the way of them neuer so steepe , neuer so rocky . And a good and cheerefull heart in a sicke man , is the best Sirrop , and the most comfortable cordiall in the world ; your Amber , your Corall , your Pearle , your Gold , and all the rabble of your other restoratiues are nothing vnto it . And therefore it is good for a man to make himselfe as merry as he can . And when thou seest a man once to wax merry when he is sicke , thou maist boldly say he mends .

Now then , by this time , our Gentleman is vp vpon his feet , and though yet weake and scarce able to walke vp and downe in his Chamber ( his long sicknesse hauing yet made his legges vnable to beare his body ) he forthwith furnished himselfe of a Moore , to be both his Guide , and Interpreter , who had for a long time serued the Kings of Granada as an Intelligencer And putting vp good store of gold and iewels for that iourney , and taking with him a good horse , that was browne Bay , with a Petronell hanging at the arson of his Saddle , and his Sword and Dagger girt to his side , vpon a certaine night by them appointed they depar●…ed out of the Citie , in the fashion and habit of Spaniards ; and going by the way , knowing well how to coast the Country , as being well acquainted with those parts , they passed within view of the enemies Campe , and hauing left that behinde them by by-pathes , and secret passages they came to Loja . Where , being neere vnto the Citie , it was their hard fortune to meet with a Captaine of the field , who went gathering vp of men which had fled from the Army , and forsaken their colours . Now as soone as he spied these two , he tooke hold of them . The Moore feigned hee had a Pasport , seeking for it one while in his bosome , another while in his pocket , and other parts about him . But because he could not finde it , and for that the Captaine perceiued he had beene out of the rode way , which made him shrewdly to suspect them , he tooke them along with him , to bring them backe againe to the Campe .

But Ozmin not dismayed herewith , nor suffering any alteration of countenance , with great boldnes and free la●…age , making benefit of the Noble-mans name ▪ in whose power his Spouse was , feigned himselfe to be his sonne , stiling himselfe by the name of Don Rodrigo de Padilla , and that he came with a message to their Catholicke Maiesties from his father touching Daraxa ; and that his health failing him ( which was witnessed by his wanne lookes ) hee was making home with all the conuenient haste hee could . Other-whiles , hee affirmed he had lost both his Pasport , and his way ; and that to returne againe thereinto , he had betaken himselfe to that path .

But this would not serue his turne , for hee still insisted to haue them goe backe , whilest they either did not , or would not then vnderstand , that he did not care a button whether they returned or no ? His pretension onely was , that a Gentleman of that ranke and quality , as hee pretended himselfe to be , should haue blinded his eyes with some few Dubblons ; for there is no Generals hand , that can equall the seale-Royall , which is of so much the more power with vs ; by how much wee finde it firmed and instamped with that more noble metall . For your poore Shag-rags , and silly snakes , that steale from the Armie to returne home : for these ( I say ) they haue teeth , and sharpe ones too , and on such poor soules as these , doe they onely exercise their power , executing those orders which are made against such kind of fugitiues : But not on them , from whom they haue hope of profit , and may make good gaine ; for this is that they seeke for .

Ozmin suspecting whither these brauings of his did tend ; and finding on which foot he began to halt , followed him close , and began thus to speake vnto him : Misconster me not ( Noble Captaine ) nor thinke , that it shall grieue me a whit to returne once more backe againe , nor were it ten times one after another , should it trouble me to reiterate the steps that I haue troden ; nay , I would willingly repeate the same way againe and againe ; if my health ( as you see ) were not wanting vnto mee ; but since the necessitie of my returne is made euident and plaine vnto you : let me intreat you , Sir , not to put me to that trouble , seeing it is as much as my life is worth , considering the weakenesse wherein I now am . And with that , taking a rich ring from off his finger , he put it into his hand , which was as if he should haue throwne Vinegar vpon fire ; for he streight grew coole vpon it , and kindely said vnto him ; Sir , God be your good speed ; for I well perceiue that you are as you seeme to bee a man of principall note , that does not serue the King for pay , nor would out of your noblenesse and point of honour forsake the field , but vpon so great an occasion as this . I shall waight vpon you to Loja , where I will giue order , that you passe forward with the more safety . And so he did , remaining both good friends ; and when they had reposed themselues a while , they tooke their leaue .

Attended with these and other the like misfortunes , they arriued at length at Seuill ; where , by the information that he had gotten , he came to know the street and house where his Daraxa dwelt : hee walked many a faire turne thereabout at different howers , and on diuers dayes , but it was neuer his good hap to see her : for in regard shee walked not abroad , nor went to Church , she spent her whole time in her needle , and in recreating her selfe with her friend Donna Elvira .

Now Ozmin perceiuing the difficulty to compasse his desire , and the suspicion which he might giue , ( as ordinarily all strangers do , in what-soeuer place they come : for all mens eyes are vpon them , desiring to know who they are , whence they come , what they seeke , and how they liue , especially if they frequent one street more then another , and cast a carefull eye either vpon the windowes or the doores of some particular house . ) Hence ariseth enuie ; hence , a muttering and murmuring of the multitude ; and hence , ( though none be interessed in the businesse ) an hatred without a cause . And some whisperings were already begun ; whereupon he was inforced , for the auoyding of scandall , to forbeare for some few dayes , whilest his seruant in the meane while performed that office , as being a person of lesse esteeme , and therefore the lesse obserued . But hee making no discouery , did onely comfort himselfe in walking that way in the night at extraordinary howers , and in imbracing the wals , kissing the doores and thresholds of that house .

In this forlorne kind of hope he liued some time , till at length that fell out which sorted with his desire . For his seruant taking the care vpon him to round the house three or foure times aday , found out in the end , that Don Luys was a making vp of a certaine Wall that was falne downe . Then did he take Occasion by the fore-top , aduising his Master to put on a poore canuasse Frocke , or the like base garment , and to thrust himselfe in amongst the rest , as a Labourer in that Worke . He liked well of the inuention , put it in execution , leauing his seruant to looke to his horse , and the wealth and Iewels that were in his Lodging , that he might helpe himselfe there-withall , if need were . And so he went foorth to this worke : whither , when he came , he demanded , if they had any worke for a stranger ; they told him , they had . For his wages , it is to be supposed , that he for his part was willing to bee hired at any rate , rather then to sit out . So he now sets himself roundly to his worke , striuing to out-worke them all : and albeit , through his many crosses and discontents , he had not yet recouered his perfect health , yet ( as the phrase is ) he drew strength out of weaknesse : for it is the heart that commands the flesh . He was the first still that came to worke , and the last that left off : and when all the rest were willing to take their ease and refresh themselues , hee was still seeking out something , wherein he might busie himselfe : insomuch that being found fault withall for it by his fellow-Labourers , ( for euen in misfortunes Enuy likewise hath a hand ) he made them answer ; That he knew not how to be idle . Don Luys , who noted his diligence , had a liking vnto him , and was resoluing with himselfe to take him into his seruice for the affaires of his house ; and more particularly for the keeping of his Garden . Hereupon he demanded of him , whether he had any skill in that kind ? Hee told him , A little ; and that the desire that he had to do him seruice , would in short time inable him much more . He was well pleased both with his speech and person ; for he had found him in euery thing , to be as sufficient , as he was carefull .

The Mason had made an end of repayring the wall , and Ozmin was now Gardiner to Don Luys : nor vntill that day , was it euer possible for him to see Daraxa . But such was his good fortune ( Fortune being willing so to haue it ) that the Sunne shone bright that morning , the skie was cleare , the heauens propitious , scattering the clouds of his former disgraces , and discouering a new light ; by helpe whereof , he saw the ioyfull hauen to his long-indured ship-wracks .

And the very first Euening that he exercised this his new Office , he saw his Spouse comming all alone , softly pacing her steps thorow a spacous Walke , beset all with Myrtles , muske-Roses , Iesmines , and other Flowers , gathering here and there one , where-with she adorned her haire . Now by her attire , he would neuer haue knowne her , if the true Originall had not well agreed with that liuely counterfeit , which he had imprinted in his heart : as likewise , that he did plainely perceiue , that so great beauty could not belong to any body but her selfe . He was much perplexed when he saw her , and debated with himselfe , whether he were best to speake to her or no : but his bashfulnesse being as great , as was his preuention , being hindred by the shortnes of that time wherein she passed along , he hung downe his head , making holes in the earth with a Dibbe that he had in his hand , for the setting of a few choyce Slips .

Daraxa turn'd her head aside , and when in the casting of it , shee saw this new Gardiner ; she stedfastly began to looke vpon him : and viewing well that side of his face ( which did most conueniently discouer it selfe vnto her ) that place did represent it selfe to her imagination , where she had so often beheld her Beloued , ( so like did he seeme vnto her : ) whereupon , such a sudden sadnesse seized vpon her , that fainting she fell to ground ; and when shee came to her selfe , taking hold on the Rayles of the Garden , which were wrought of well-ordered Canes , ( according to the fashion of that Country ) she sent forth a most sorrowfull sigh , attended with infinite store of teares ; and leaning her hand on her rosie cheeke , she called many things to remembrance ; wherein , if she should haue insisted vpon euery particular , and perseuered in the recordation of them ; she might easily haue beene the authour of her owne death . But she did put them off as well as she could , with another new desire which she had , to intertaine her soule with his sight ; deceiuing those conceits , with that little parcell of Ozmins face which represented it selfe vnto her .

Hereupon she rose , but accompanied with a generall trembling , ( her whole body and heart , panting and shiuering with an aguish fit of Loue ) and turning againe to contemplate anew the image of her adoration ; which the more attentiuely she beheld , the more liuely she transformed the same into her selfe . It seemed vnto her that she had beene in a dreame , but when shee perceiued that she was awake , and that her sight serued her , she was afrayd it was some ghost or Fairy-apparition . But afterwards , when vpon better view she saw it was a man , a very man , and no Phantasma , she wished that it might be he , whom she loued . Notwithstanding , she was mightily perplexed in mind , and cast many doubts with her selfe , not beeing able to deuise who this man should be . For his sicknesse had layd a palenesse on his cheekes , which had lost their wonted colours ; but in all other things besides , as his fauour , his feature , his proportion , and carriage did assure her of the truth : yet his office , his habit , and the very place wherein hee stood , made her discard all such kind of thoughts , and to dis-deceiue her selfe : and again , it grieued her to be drawne out of this errour , persisting obstinately in her wish , not being able to abstaine to discouer her particular affection vnto him , for the resemblance which he had of him , whom she so dearely loued : wherupon , out of those her doubtings and anxieties to know what hee was , she sayd vnto him ; Friend , whence are you ? With that , Ozmin suddenly , and in a starting manner casts vp his head , looking vpon his beloued and sweetest pledge , but his tongue being knit close to the roofe of his mouth with the fullest knot of Loue ; hauing not the power to speake a word ; and not being able , no not for his life , ( so great was his passion ) to answer her with his tongue , he replyed with his eyes , watering the earth with that abundance of teares , which fell guttering downe his cheekes , as if they had flowed from two cleare fountaines . And with this , these two deere and faithfull Louers came to haue true knowledge each of other .

Daraxa answered him in his owne language , distilling ropes of Pearles in round orientall drops downe her louely cheekes . And now were they ready to exchange imbracements , at least some sweet words of Loue ; when lo , in the instant there entred into the Garden Don Rodrigo , sonne and heyre to Don Luys , who being inamoured of Daraxa , did alwayes wait vpon her steps , that he might thereby inioy the occasion to contemplate on her beauty . Now , that they might auoyd all suspicion , they no sooner spyde him , but Ozmin returned roundly to his labour , and Daraxa walked leysurely along , as she was wont to do . Don Rodrigo perceiued ( by her sad semblance , and inflamed eyes , growne red with weeping ) an alteration in her countenance , and presuming that somewhat had offended her , ( for her lookes did shew she was not well pleas'd ) he made towards Ozmin , and asked him what the matter might be of her discontent : who , albeit he was not fully as yet recouered of his fore-passed perturbation , yet inforced by that necessity whereunto he was driuen , told him ; Sir , as you see her now , so was she when she came hither , she did not exchange so much as one word with me ; and therefore told me no part of her mind , nor do I know whence this her passion should proceed . Especially , this being the first day , that I entred into this place : so that it was neither fitting for me to aske her the question , nor discretion in her to open her heart vnto me . With this answere he went his way , with purpose to learne it out of Daraxa her selfe . But the more he intertained himselfe in this displeasing subiect , the larger steps shee made , speedily wheeling about to her Lodging , shutting the doores after her as she went in .

Diuers Euenings and Mornings these two Louers luckily met , inioying vpon seueral occasions some flowers , and honest fruits from the tree of true loue , wherewith they gaue some ease vnto their griefes ; Intertaining their true pleasures , with the desire and hope of that happy time , wherein without shadowes and interruptions , they might freely inioy each other . But this content of theirs was as short , as vnsecure . For the extraordinary continuation of their companying together , and their close discourse , ( and that in the Arabicke tongue ) and her excusing herselfe ( for his sake ) from the conuersation of her friend Donna Elvira , had already giuen sufficient distaste to all those of the house , and Don Rodrigo himselfe was horne-mad , inraged so with Ielousie , that he knew not what to do . Not that he had any the least imagination , that the Gardiner did treat with her any thing that was vnlawfull , or made any loue to her : but because he saw , that he was made worthy to be intertained with so much frequencie in that sweet conuersation of hers , which she did not exercise so freely with any other in the world .

THE ARGVMENT .

Going on in the discourse of the aduentures of these two faithfull Louers , Ozmin and the faire Daraxa , are deliuered at large the troubles , ielousies , and the sorrowes that befell them .

MVrmuring , being the naturall daughter of Hatred and Enuy , is euer more busily labouring to staine the liues of others , and to draw a curtaine of darknesse ouer their bright-shining vertues . And amongst people of base and vile condition , ( where most commonly she keepes her Court of Audience ) it is the onely sauce to moue their appetite , without which their daintiest dishes haue no rellish , nor their best morsels any sauour in them . It is a bird of the flippantst wing , which as it moueth with most nimblenesse , so it doth the greatest mischiefe . There were not some wanting , that tossed words from hand to hand ; some adding , and others inuenting matter vpon this their so great familiaritie , till the ball at last came to ground , and this whispering to Don Luys his eare , by one who thought to worke out himselfe a fortune therby , and to grow into fauour with his Lord , by this his supposed honourable piece of seruice .

This is that which the world doth practice , seeking to gaine great mens loue at other mens cost , by trickes and lies , when in the naked truth there is not cloth inough to shape a garment according to their mind . An office , worthy those , to whom their owne worth is wanting , and haue nothing either in their actions , or their persons , that may deseruedly recommend them .

Don Luys attentiuely gaue eare to these well-composed words , and painted speeches , on which such faire colours were layd . He was a wise and discreet Gentleman , and therefore did not suffer them to dwell , where these men had placed them , but gaue them onely passage to his imagination , leauing a roome empty for to receiue the reasons of the defendant , to whom he had left the doore open , and would by no meanes giue way to haue his eares stopped , albeit he were somewhat offended with the occasion of the scandall . Many things did he cast in his mind , but still the farther hee went , the farther he was from the truth . But that which did most trouble him , was the suspicion which he had , that the Gardiner was a Moore , who was cunningly come thither to steale away Daraxa : and perswading himselfe that it was so , his vnderstanding was presently blinded there-with . And that which is ill considered on , many times , nay , for the most part ; the execution of that aduice is scarce gone out of doores , but that repentance presently enters the house . Vpon this surmise , he was resolued to take hold of him , and to clappe him fast . Ozmin , without any resistance , or show of Sorrow , or any other alteration of countenance , submitted himselfe to be shut vp in the Hall , the fittest place the suddennesse of his surprise could afford for the present . And leauing him thus vnder locke and key , he made towards Daraxa , who by the hurrie and tumult of the ministers and seruants of the house , knew already all that had past , there hauing beene some few dayes before a muttring of this matter about the house . She shewed her selfe much agrieued with Don Luys his manner of proceeding , forming complaints , how he had put in doubt the goodnesse and vnspotted innocencie of her life , setting the gate wide open to Suspicion ; and that with this blurre which he had giuen to her reputation , euery one might thinke as he listed , and as his fancie should stand affected , to censure her honour accordingly ; for there was not any suspicion so bad , whereunto he had not by this his vnaduised act , opened a gap to it's entrance .

These , and other well-ordered reasons , deliuered with an affection of the mind , and freenesse of spirit , made Don Luys quickly repent himselfe of what he had done . He now wisht with all his heart , ( after Daraxa had thus newly molded him ) that he had neuer attempted any such thing , being angry with himselfe , and much incensed against those , who had put this into his head . But that he might not shew his lightnesse , in being thus mis-led , and ouer-facile to be wrought vpon by other mens perswasions , but that what hee had done , he had done it vpon good consideration , and as the weightinesse of the businesse required , dissembling his sorrow , he spake thus vnto her :

Deare Daraxa , I acknowledge the wrong I haue done you , and ingeniously confesse that your complaint is not without iust cause , in that I proceeded against you in this vnciuill fashion , without hauing first examined the Witnesses to the full , who haue deposed , ( as it should seeme ) thus wrongfully against you . I am not ignorant of your owne woorth , as likewise that of your parents , and Ancestors , from whom you are descended . I know , that the merits of your owne proper person haue purchased of the King my Master , and his noble Queene , all that loue , which a true and onely heyre can gaine of his louing and tender Parents , hauing conferred vpon you many prodigall and publike fauours . To this I must giue you to vnderstand , that they placed you in my house ; to the end that you might be serued therein with all care and diligence , according to your own will and pleasure : And that I am bound to giue account thereof , according to the trust that was reposed in me . For which reasons , and for that which my seruice deserueth at your hands , you ought to correspond ( that you may not be vnlike your selfe ) with that faire carriage which is due vnto my loyalty , and the consideration of these things that are now in question . I neither can nor will conceiue , that there can bee any thing in you that may seeme vnbefitting your breeding , or giue the least blemish to your honour . But the great familiaritie which you hold with Ambrosio ( for that name had Ozmin put vpon himselfe , when he first entred to serue as a day-labourer ) together with his talking vnto you in the Arabike tongue , hath somewhat troubled me , out of the generall desire that all heere haue to vnderstand what manner of man this fellow is , and what his first beginning , neither you , nor my selfe hauing seene or knowne him heretofore . And this being satisfied , you shall rid others of their doubt , and my selfe of an impertinent and tedious trouble . I beseech you ( as you are worthy ) that you will resolue vs of this scruple , assuring your selfe for mine owne part , that as much as in me lyeth , I shall euer bee ready to serue you vpon all occasions that shall offer themselues , wherein I may be seruiceable vnto you .

Daraxa stood curiously attentiue to that which Don Luys had deliuered , that she might be able to make answere vnto him , ( albeit his good vnderstanding had already preuented her with reasons ) in case that any thing had beene discouered . But out of that short tearme of time which she had to bethinke her selfe ( laying her former thoughts aside ) she was driuen to make vse of other more materiall to that proposition which was made vnto her , wherewith easily ( leauing him well satisfied ) shee freed him of his care , making good vse of it , to bee more wary hereafter , that shee might inioy her selfe , as shee was wont , with her beloued ; and therewithall she thus said vnto him :

My Lord , and Father ; ( for so I may truely call you ) Lord , for that I am in your power : and Father , for the tender care which you haue of me . I should ill correspond with that obligation whereunto I am bound , and those continuall fauours , which I receiue from their Maiesties by your meanes , and by your intercessions dayly augmented in my fauour , if I should not deposite in the Cabinet of your discretion , my greatest secrets : sheltring them with your shadow , and gouerning my selfe by your wisedome : and if with the same truth and plainenesse , I should not fulfill all your iust desires . And albeit to recall things to my remembrance ( which I may not forbeare to recite vnto you ) cannot but be a great griefe vnto me , and euen a matter of no small martyrdome ; yet with this I will repay your kindnesse , and make you become a debtor to my sorrowes , and giue you assurance thereby in how much I esteeme your loue .

Sir , you haue already vnderstoood who I am , for it is notorious to you , and all the world ; and how my misfortune or good hap ( for I can not , till the fruit wax ripe , by seeing the end of so many troubles , condemne the one , or commend the other : ) brought me to this house of yours , euen at that very time , when a marriage was in Treaty for me , with a Gentleman of the best both worth and ranke in Granada , being a neere Kinsman of those Kings , and anciently descended from them .

This my Husband ( if I may so stile him ) was bred vp , being then about some sixe or seuen yeeres of age , with another child a Captiue Christian , much about the same yeeres , whom his parents bought for his seruice and entertainment . They euer went together , plaid together , eate together , and vsually slept together , out of the great loue that was betweene them . See whether these were not pledges of friendship which I haue repeated vnto you . And so well did my Husband loue him , that had hee beene his equall , or his neerest Kinsman , he could not haue lou'd him better . Hee trusted him with his person ; for he was very valiant ; he was the Feoffie of all his pleasures , the Companion of his entertainments , the Treasury of his Secrets , and in substance his second selfe . In conclusion , they were in all things both of them so like , that nothing did difference them , but their Religion , whereof ( out of the greatnesse of both their discretions ) they neuer argued , that they might not dis-brother themselues . For no brothers in the world could loue better then they did . And well did this Captiue deserue his loue ( I spake amisse , the word Brother better befits him , and so I should haue call'd him ) for his faithfull carriage , his composed behauiour , and his Gentleman-like proceeding ; in somuch , that if we had not knowne him to haue beene borne of meane parents that got their liuing by their handy-labour , in a poore Cottage , who were captiuated and made slaues at the same time , we should verily haue beleeu'd , that he had descended from some Noble bloud , and generous off-spring .

This honest man ( I should say honourable ; for his vertue deserues that stile ) was the Messenger of our entertainments , the Post that ranne betweene vs ▪ for being so faithfull as he was , hee was the onely man that was wholly imployed in that businesse . He brought me Letters and presents , returning back by him such due requitals , as in like cases vsually passe betwixt those that truely loue .

Now , when Baça was deliuered vp , and he found there , hee was set at liberty , together with the rest of the Captiues that were at that time within the Citie . But I am not able to say , whether his ioy to recouer his freedome , or his sorrow to forsake vs , were the greater . This himselfe can best tell you , as also whatsoeuer else you shall desire to know besides , if it please you to aske him , which is no hard matter for you to doe : for this man I speake of , is that very Ambrosio , which is now in your seruice , it being Gods will that he should come hither , for to be a comfort vnto me in these my afflictions . I lost him before euer I thought of it ; and when I least looked for him , I found him againe . With him I ranne ouer the whole course of my misfortunes , since the first time that I was graduated and tooke degree in them ; with him I did cherish the hopes of my aduerse fortune , entertaining a painefull life , for to deceiue the wearisomnesse of alingring and tedious time . If this comfort ( for that it is in my fauour ) shall offend you , follow your owne will , for mine shall euer be subordinate to yours , which you may dispose of at your pleasure .

Don Luys was strooken with astonishment and tendernesse , as well for the strangenesse , as the pittifulnesse of her Story . Besides , he was much mooued with her manner of proceeding ; for she went on in her Discourse without any pausing , perturbation , or other accident , whereby hee might coniecture , that it was a made tale , or inuention of her owne vpon the present . Which carriage she did credit the better , by letting fall from her eyes some effectuall teares , which were able to soften hard Marble , and to rent in sunder the rocky Diamond .

With this speech of hers , Ambrosio was loosed out of prison , without being questioned of any thing , that he might not wrong the report which Daraxa had giuen of him : Onely laying his arme about his neck , looking cheerefully vpon him , he told him . Now I know Ambrosio ) that thou hast some noble bloud about thee ; and though this should be wanting vnto thee , thou art able to giue it thy selfe by thine owne vertue and noblenesse . For by that which I haue lately heard of thee , I am obliged henceforth to vse thee with that fairenesse as thy worth deserueth . Ozmin told him ; In this , Sir , you shall doe like your selfe ; and the good which I shall receiue from you , I shall euer make it my glory , that it came from the largenesse of your hand , and from so noble a House as this is . This past , he was permitted to return againe vnto the garden , with the same familiaritie as before , if not with much more licence and freenesse of liberty . So that now they talked together as often as they would themselues , without any scandall at all .

In this interim , the King and Queene had still a care to know how it was with Daraxa , as well in the state of her health , as otherwise ; whereof particular aduice was giuen them from time to time , who were very glad to heare of her well-doing ; and did continually in their Letters recommend her very dearely to the care of Don Luys , with expresse charge to vse her with all kindnesse .

This fauour of theirs wrought so much , that as well out of the desire to stand in grace with their Maiesties , as out of Daraxa her owne deserts ; not onely Don Rodrigo , but most of the principall Cauallero's of that Citie , wished in their hearts she were a Christian , that they might make loue vnto her , pretending to take her to Wife . But because Don Rodrigo had her ( as hath been said ) in his custody , he was in the common opinion of the World , amongst all the other riualls thought to be most fauoured by her . The case was very cleere , and this suspition not without great likelihood . For of his qualitie , condition , behauiour , and faire proceeding , she had had very good tryall ; and ostentations of this nature , and apparences of such commendable parts as these , are not wont to be of the slightest moment , nor the lowest round in the Ladder , that climbes vnto honour . For when a man shall haue made publike demonstrations of his vertues , and his noble carriage , it is to be presumed he will be no lesse beloued , then he is knowne ; and so get aduantage of those , who ( when it shall come to matter of opposition ) shall be vnder-valued by opinion . But as if these Louers had exchanged their soules , and none of them possessed that which was his owne , they were as firme in louing , as farre from offending .

Daraxa neuer gaue way by any dis-composture , or vnioynted behauiour , or any other occasion whatsoeuer , whereby any one might presume more then other vpon her fauour ; howbeit , all of them adored her , left no meanes vnsought to procure her loue , nor no nets vnspred , seeking by traines to draw her within their reach , but none of them had any ground , whereupon to build their hopes .

Don Rodrigo perceiuing how little his seruices did auaile him , how his labour was in vaine , and the small remedy that hee found , since after so many dayes spent in her continuall conuersation , he remained in the same state as he did the very first day , neither better nor worse , for ought hee knew , it came into his consideration to make vse of Ozmin , thinking by his intercession to get into her fauour ; and taking this to be the best and surest way to worke his ends , being one morning in the garden , hee brake thus with him :

Friend Ambrosio , Thou canst not but know the obligations which thou hast to thy Religion , to thy King , to thy Country , to that bread which thou eatest of my Fathers , and to that desire , which we haue of thy good . I conceiue , that as a Christian of that quality , which thy workes doe publish , thou wilt correspond with that thou professest thy selfe to be .

I come to thee , moued thereunto by a great necessitie ( which now offers it selfe vnto me ) whereupon doth depend all the increase of mine honour , and the safety of my life , which wholly lyes in thy hands . If discoursing then with Daraxa , amongst other reasons , thou shalt worke her by force of Argument , that she forsake this false Sect , wherewith she is now infected , & make her to become a Christian , thou canst not but see what good will come thereof : first , Saluation to her owne soule ; next , good seruice vnto God ; thirdly , great content to their Catholike Maiesties ; fourthly , honour to thy selfe in thy Countrey ; and lastly , to my selfe perfect happinesse . For , desiring her to Wife , I meane to be married vnto her , and the benefit shall not be small which thou shalt make by this voyage ; for it shall be as profitable , as it shall be honourable vnto thee ; and therefore straine all the wits thou hast to bring this good purpose to passe . For besides that thou shalt bee rewarded by God , for the soule which thou shalt gaine , I for my part will , with many requitals , and those reall , recompence the life which thou shalt giue mee by thy good diligence in this businesse , and if ( exercising thy power with her , ) it shall be my good hap to winne her by thy intercession . Doe not refuse to doe mee this fauour , since thou canst doe so much with her : And because there are so many tyes vpon thee , to induce thee hereunto , it is not fit that I should presse thee any further , or be too importunate with thee . To whom , when hee had ended his exhortation , Ozmin made him this answere :

My very good Lord ; The same reason , wherewith you seeke to binde me , ought likewise to oblige you to beleeue , how much I desire that Daraxa should follow my Religion , which very earnestly , diuers , nay infinit times I haue perswaded her vnto . My desire is no other , then your own ; and therefore I will vse all diligence in this particular cause , as in a thing wherein I am so much interessed . But louing her betrothed friend , and my Master so dearely as she does , to treat with her to turne Christian , were but to double passion in her , without any other fruit at all : For she hath some hopes yet aliue in her , that Fortune may turne the wheele againe , flattering her selfe with some accident or other , whereby in time she may come to inioy her desire . This is all that I can yet learne from her , shee is still harping vpon this string , and ( for ought that I can perceiue ) very constant in this conceit of hers . But that I may comply with that , which you command me , I shall ( though I were sure my labour should be fruitlesse ) returne once more to treat with her in this kinde ; and when I haue done , I will acquaint you with her answere . The Moore did not lye in any one word that he said , had he been rightly vnderstood ; but ( not thinking on a thing so remote ) Don Rodrigo gaue credit , not to that which he truely , but to that he formally deliuered . And so ( though deceiued ) he had some confidence with him , and was not cleane out of hope . For Quien de veras ama , Se-enganna , con desengannos : Hee that truely loues , is deceiu'd with that , which ought to dis-deceiue him .

Ozmin ( when Rodrigo was gone ) remained so sad to see the open instance which was made to his owne hurt , that he was ready through iealousie to runne out of his wits . Which did so afflict him , that from that day forward you could neuer get a cheerefull looke from him , and making things impossible , seeme possible vnto him , hee did wrastle and struggle with himselfe ; imagining , that this new Competitor ( being powerfull in his owne House and Country ) might vse some tricks and deuices , wherewith to hinder his intent , being so sollicitous as he was , and so earnest in the businesse . He feared againe on the other side , lest she might be wrought to alter her former affection ; for many batteries make a breach in the strongest walles ; and with secret mynes they are blowne vp , and laid leuell with the ground .

Out of this iealousie of his , hee discoursed in his thoughts of Tragicall ends , and disastrous accidents , which presented themselues vnto his phantasie , which he did not so much beleeue , as he did mightily feare , because hee was a perfect Louer .

Daraxa seeing how her dearest beloued had for many dayes together continued in this melancholy mood , was very desirous to know the cause of this his sadnesse : but she could not wring it from him , nor did he speake a word of that vnto her , which had past betwixt him and Don Rodrigo . Shee ( poore Gentlewoman ) knew not what to do , nor which way to worke him to bee merry ; howbeit with sweet words , vttered from a daintier tongue , pleasant smiles , and a constant heart , much augmented by those faire eyes , whose warme teares did be-dew her tender cheeks with those cristall waters which did slow from them , she softly breathed foorth ( hauing first sent foorth many a sigh , as heralds of her sorrowfull mind : these few words vnto him . )

Lord of my life and liberty ; my betroathed , whom I honour and obay , what thing can there be of that force , ( I being aliue , and in your presence ) that should thus to my hurt torment and grieue you ? May my life peraduenture be the price of your ioy ? or how will you be pleased to dispose of it , whereby my soule may be freed from this hell of sorrow , wherein for your sake I am tormented ? Let the chearefull heauen of your countenance , scatter those clouds wherewith my heart is ouer-cast , if I am able to doe any thing with you ; if the loue which I beare you deserueth ought ; if the griefe wherein I am may moue you to pity ; if you will not that my life receiue its buriall in your secrecie , I beseech you to tell me the cause of your sadnesse . Here she stopt ; for her teares had choak't her vtterance , sorrow working on them both , one and the same effect ; for he could not answer her otherwise , then with the scalding teares of loue , each striuing with their owne to dry vp the others , seeming both to bee one and the selfe-same thing , as long as their tongues were thus tyed , and the current of their speach stopped .

Ozmin , with the oppression of his sighes , ( for he closely smoothered them ) fearing ( if he should vent them ) to be ouer-heard , did so long resist them , by returning them backe againe vnto his soule ; from whence they would haue broken out their way , that he fell downe into a swoune ; and so deepe an one , as that he lay for dead . Daraxa knew not what to do , nor how to fetch him againe , nor which way to comfort him , nor could she conceiue what might be the cause of this so great and sudden an alteration , hauing formerly beene accustomed to shew himselfe merry and cheerefull . Shee was very busie in wiping his face , in drying his eyes , putting her faire hands vpon them ; after she had dip't a rich hand-kerchiefe , that she had about her in the water , imbroydered with gold and siluer , inter-wouen with diuers other glorious colours , and scattered here and there with pearle , and other deuices of wonderfull both worth and workmanship . So much was she transformed into this paine of his ; and her senses so wholly taken vp in seeking to recouer him , that had this fit continued but a little longer , Don Rodrigo might haue found them little lesse then arme in arme ; for Daraxa had his head leaning on her knee , and one side of his body folded in her Gowne , when he first began to come to himselfe . Now when his Senses were come againe into their proper places , and all was well , thinking to haue taken his leaue of her , Don Rodrigo on the nicke , comes into the garden . Daraxa ( though much troubled ) came off as handsomely as she could , leauing through haste her curious hand-kerchiefe on the ground , which was quickly taken vp by Ozmin , who presently had it in his eye .

Now when she saw that Don Rodrigo drew nigh , she went her way , and left them two alone together : Rodrigo ( when he saw the coast was cleare ) ask't him what he had done in the busines ? He told him , ( as he had at other times ) that he found her so firme in her loue to her betrothed friend , that she will not onely not be wonne , ( as you pretend ) to be a Christian : but if shee were so , yet for his sake , she would willingly turne Moore ; so extreame is her owne folly , the loue of her Religion , and of her husband . I treated your businesse with her ; and to you , because you attempt it , and to me , because I propose it , she beareth vs both that hatred , that she is resolued , if euer I speake word thereof againe , neuer any more to see me ; and as for you , you see , she no sooner saw you , but she went her way . So that I would not haue you weary out your selfe in this suit , nor spend any more time in it ; for I see it will be but in vaine , and a hopelesse piece of worke . Don Rodrigo was strucken deeply into his dumpes with this so resolute an answer , deliuered with that sharpnesse , which made it the more sowre and vnfit for rellish . From that time forward he began to suspect that Ozmin was rather in his preiudice , then profit , and did rather dis-aduantage , then aduance his pretension . Howsoeuer he thought at least with himselfe , that though Daraxa might haply haue giuen so distastfull a reply , yet it did ill become him to report it vnto him , in that rough fashion as he did , making himselfe , as it were , master and ruler of the roste : but such impossible things in their incounter are Loue and discretion ; for euermore a man is so much the more confounded and troubled in himselfe , by how much the more hee loueth and affecteth : hereupon did represent it selfe vnto him that strict league of amity and friendship , which Daraxa reported to haue beene betwixt him and his old Master , he imagined , that loue was still aliue in him , and could not be perswaded , that the ashes of that fire were yet growne cold . With this conceit ( which was re-inforced by his passion ) he was fully bent to put him out of the house , informing his father how vnfitting it was ; nay how dangerous to permit ( where Daraxa was ) such a one , as might intertaine her in the Discourse of her former Loue , still putting her in mind thereof , especially it being their Maiesties intent and purpose to haue her turne Christian : which would be hard to do , as long as Ambrosio was there . Let vs , Sir , ( sayd he ) make some triall by sundring them some few dayes one from another , and then we shall see what effect it will bring foorth .

Don Luys did no whit mislike his sonnes councell , and presently picking a quarrell , where no cause was , ( for of great men we must not aske the reason of things ; and a Captaine with his souldiers will bee bold now and then to make fifteene of two ●…ights ) he dismissed him of his seruice , commanding him , that he should not so much as once dare to passe by the doore . And hee tooke him so on the sudden , that he could not take his leaue of Daraxa . And so obaying his Master , faining lesse sorrow , then what he felt , he remoued his body from thence , for that pledge he could carry whither he listed ) but for his soule , that abode still with her , in whose power it had formerly so long remained .

THE ARGVMENT .

Continuing the Story of the loue of Ozmin and Daraxa , are recounted the troubles and griefes that befell them both : as also those publike Feasts , that were made by diuers Knights and Gentlemen , for to glad and cheare vp the dis-consolate Daraxa : and of the valour which Ozmin in disguise and vnknowe , did performe in them .

DAraxa seeing so sudden a change , began to suspect that his former sorrow had its birth from that new successe ; and now by the sequele assured her selfe it was so : whereupon adding one euill to another , sorrow to sorrow , and griefe to griefe , wanting the sight of her espoused Lord ; albeit the poore Lady did dissemble it all that shee could , yet this was that , which did most trouble her . Giue them leaue to weepe , howle , sigh , cry , and talke , that find themselues afflicted : for albeit they doe not there-with take away the burthen of that paine which they indure , yet it doth lessen sorrow , and makes the load somewhat lighter . She was so depriued of all content , so heauily sad , and so bodily afflicted , that you might read her griefes not onely in her face and countenance , but throughout all the course of her carriage . Our inamoured Moore would not change his estate and condition of life ; for as he went clad before , the same stile he still continued , and in the habit of a day-Labourer , he followed his painefull fortune : therein hee had had good successe , and he hoped the like with aduantage . He daily followed his worke hard , where there was ought to be got , going in this sort from place to place to proue his fortune , trying if by this meanes he could come to heare or hearken out any thing that might import him , or serue his turne concerning Daraxa : for no other end or interest in the world had he but this , to labour so hard as he did ; for he had liberally to spend with a large hand for many dayes together , out of the meanes that he had brought from home in money and in Iewels . But as well for that which hath beene sayd , as also because hee was well knowne in that habit , that he might haue the freer licence wheresoeuer he came , and himselfe remaine safe in his person vnder this disguise , lest his designes might otherwise be ouerthrowne , he continued his wonted weare .

Those young Canallero's that serued Daraxa , knowing the fauour that she bare to Ozmin , and that he was now no longer seruant in Don Luys his house , euery one did couet him for himselfe and his owne ends , and happy was he , that could make the first purchase ; so generall was their desire to haue him theirs .

But Don Alonso de Cuniga got the start of all the rest , being a Gentleman of that City , one that was borne to a great estate , young , gallant , and rich , and one that was confident , that others want , and his wealth , by the helpe of Ambrosio , should carry the businesse . He commanded him to be sent for , intertained him in his seruice , did him many knowne good turnes , made him more aduantageous proffers , gaue him many kind and louing words , and in conclusion , a kind of friendship was begun betweene them , ( if any such thing may be found betweene master and man : ) notwithstanding , inasmuch as man is compatible , it is commonly called by the ●…ame of Priuancie or Inwardnesse ; whereinto men grow by some deseruing seruice , with whom hauing runne ouer some passages , he came in the end to discouer his desire vnto him , promising him great rewards : all which was ●…ut an opening vnto him of his old wounds , and a ripping vp of his sores , to make them greater then before : if he were ielous before of one , now he had two Corriuals , and within a short time after , he knew of many which his Master had discouered vnto him , and which way they marched , and the meanes whereby they thought to preuaile : but for his owne part he neither sought , nor desired any furtherance of others , saue onely his good intelligence , beleeuing ( as he verily perswaded himselfe ) that solely his intercession should bee sufficient to effect it .

I am not able to imagine , much lesse to expresse the griefe which hee conceiued , seeing himselfe now the second time to be made a Bawd to his owne wife : and how fitting notwithstanding it was for him to past ▪ thorow all these pikes with a discreet kind of dissimulation .

He intertained him with good words , for feare lest it might happen vnto him , as it did with Don Rodrigo ; and if he should carry himselfe violently and inconsideratly with the rest with whom he had to deale with , he should finde his hands too full , and giue himselfe a great deale of trouble , and in the end lose all , and not come to the knowledge of any thing concerning his bestbeloued . And if we will peaceably inioy the end of our desires , we must put on Patience and sufferance in the atchieuement of them .

He bore him fayrely in hand , albeit his heart was all on fire , his various thoughts gaue him many a shrewd battell , and assaulted him on euery side , galling him in such cruell manner , that like a Bull inraged , he knew not how to helpe himselfe , nor whither to fly for succour , nor behind whom to runne , nor could he find any comfort for to ease those intolerable torments which he indured . The Hare was single , the Grayhounds many , and all light-footed , they had certaine Falcons too in their fauour , that for all their high place , would not refuse to stoope to their Lure , for hope of reward : to these I may adde a number of she-friends and acquaintance , comming to visit and banquet with Daraxa , who too too vsually set fire to the honour of many a faire Lady , and blow the coales of Lust in many Noble houses of good report and honest fame : many Ladies and Gentlewomen enter ( for such they are in appearance ) and all forsooth vnder the faire name of Uisites ; some , out of the difficulty they find at home in their owne houses to effect their purpose ; others , to worke deceite , and to bring innocent Dames , by one deuice or other into the same net , wherein themselues haue beene caught . Of these kind of creatures there are great store , the world is full of them , and the practice too too common . Nay , out of the principallest and grauest sort of Ladies , the Diuel hath not beene carelesse in working them to become pot-lids , and couers to these boyling vessels of concupiscence . These are those siluer Plates , that couer many a sweet morsell , after which your Gallants so eagerly long to licke their lippes , and are so sharpe set . All these things did hee feare , and many more , but most of all Don Rodrigo , to whom both himselfe , and the rest of the Riuals bare great hatred for his false arrogancie , whereof hee cunningly made vse , to haue them thereby to desist from their purpose : and the more to daunt and amate them , hee made them all beleeue , or at least would faine haue them so to thinke , that he was the onely man that was like to carry Daraxa , as hauing the best meanes and opportunity , ( besides his owne desires ) to grow into her Loue and fauour . Hereupon they spake courteously vnto him , but in their hearts they wish't him hang'd ; they powred hony to him out of their mouthes , leauing rancour and poyson in their brests ; they saluted him kindly , but curst his very bowels and intrailes , desiring to see them burst in a thousand pieces ; they smiled vpon him , but as dogges doe grin at Waspes , they long'd to haue a snap at him : this is the common fashion now in Court , and more particularly amongst those of the greatest ranke and quality .

Now let vs returne againe to Daraxa , and speake of the torments which she suffered ; of the care which she tooke to know what was become of her dearest Loue , whither he was gone , what he did , how it was with him in his health , how he spent his time , and whether he had got him some other new Mistresse ; and this did trouble her most : for albeit mothers haue likewise some sorrow for the absence of their children , yet notwithstanding the case is not alike : for they onely feare the life of their child , but a wife the losse of her husbands loue , lest some other woman with fawning blandishments , and smooth flatteries should draw his affection from her . What dayes so sad as those , what nights so tedious , as for a woman to weaue and vn-weaue her thoughts , like Penelope's Web , with the chaste desire of her beloued Ulysses ?

I shall vtter much by being silent in a passage of this nature , for to paint foorth such a sorrow as this , small was that cunning , which a famous Painter vsed vpon the death of a young damosell , who after hee had painted her dead , stretcht out to the life lying in her Coffin , hee placed round about the Coarse , her parents , her brethren , her kinsfolkes , her friends , her acquaintance , and her houshold seruants in their proper places ; and with that griefe which was fitting for euery one of them in their seuerall degrees : but when he came to her father and mother , he left off to finish their faces , giuing euery one licence and free libertie to pourtrayt foorth such a sorrow , according as he himselfe should there with be affected ; for neither words nor pensill were any way able to manifest a parents loue , or the sorrow that they conceiued , saue onely some actions , which wee haue read of Heathen people . The same course must I take . The pensill of my rude tongue , shall bee but a grosse vnhewen sticke , fit onely to forme blots and blurres ; and therefore it shall bee wisedome to leaue it to the discretion of the hearer : and to him that shall vnderstand History , to referre it to his consideration in what manner such passions as these are to be apprehended . So that euery man may measure it by his owne imagination , iudging others hearts by their owne .

Daraxa was so surcharg'd with sorrow , that her outward remonstrances manifested her inward afflictions . Don Luys seeing her so wholly taken vp with melancholly , as also Don Rodrigo his sonne , both of them for to cheere her vp , ordained certaine feasts ; as that of the running of Buls , and their juego de cannas : And because the City was so well fitted for these pastimes , it shortly after tooke effect . Now those that were Actors in these sports , had euery one of them his seuerall deuice , wrought in different sorts of silkes and colours , expressing therein their diuers passions ; one , his Despaire ; another , his Hope ; this , his Captiuity ; that , his Iealousie ; some their Ioy , some their Sorrow , and some their being in Loue , and the like . All which , and more too , did meet in poore Daraxa .

As soone as Ozmin knew that this appointed feast was to bee performed , and that his Master was one of the number he thought with himselfe , that it were not time ill spent to see his Mistris , by giuing some proofe of his valour , and setting himselfe forth that day amongst the rest . Which being come , iust as the Buls began to rune , he mounted vpon his horse , both he and it being in euery point very well fitted . His face was scarfed with watchet Taffata , that he might auoid the common eye , and his Horse had his eyes vayled with a bend of blacke . He feigned himselfe to be a stranger ; his seruant went before him , bearing in his hand a goodly strong Launce , he rounded the whole place , beholding many things of admiration which were therein : but aboue all , the beauty of Daraxa did out-shine the rest , as the day doth the night ; and in her presence all the other Dames were but darknesse . He placed himselfe right ouer against her window ; whither he was no sooner come , but hee saw the place much altered , euery man flying as fast as he could from a fierce Bull , which at that instant they had let out of the Paddock ; it was a Bull of Tarifa well growne , cunning in the carriage of his head , and as stout as a Lyon , and as full of rage . Who was no sooner let forth , but giuing two or three nimble bounds , put himselfe into the midst of the place , making himselfe Master of all that Round , to the great affright and terrour of all that were there . Hee turn'd his frizzled front from side to side , whilest diuers darts were throwne at him , which he did easily shake off , and vsed such art , that hee would not suffer them to gall him in the flanke , or other his inferiour parts : and this hee did auoid , by vsing certaine light friskals , which he performed so dexterously as they could not touch him . Now , there was not a man in all the place that durst to incounter him a horse-backe , and those that were a-foot , durst not expect his comming , nor looke him in the face , though he were neuer so farre from them . So that for very feare they left him all alone , and not one man saue onely Ozmin , and his seruant , was to be seene any thing neere him in all that circuit of ground .

The Bull , as if he had rode on the wings of the winde , ranne with all the speed he could , directly towards this Gentleman ; so that hee was forced to betake himselfe suddenly to his Launce , which he had not taken into his hand , when the Bull was first let loose , and lifting vp his right arme , bearing his Launce for his best aduantage , whereat was fastened Daraxa's Handkerchiefe which she left behind her in the Garden ( as you haue heard heretofore ) with a gracefull kinde of actiuenesse , and a gallant ayme in the carriage of his arme , he charged home vpon him ; and making way by his necke , hee ranne his Launce quite through his body , which made no stay till the point thereof had nayled the hoofe of one of his farther feete to the ground , leauing him there for dead , without any motion in the world ; there onely remaining in his hand the short broken truncheon of his Launce , which hee casting away from him in a carelesse fashion , he victoriously , but modestly quitted the place .

Daraxa was much reioyced in the sight of him : for when he first made his entrance , she knew him by his man , who had sometimes also been her seruant ; as likewise by his handkercher , which after the Bull was slaine , he wore about his arme . All that were there present , with a generall murmure , remained full of admiration , giuing him due commendation , in clearing the happinesse of the stroke , and the strength of this vnknowne Knight . Nor was any thing else in the mouthes of the multitude , then the discoursing of the braue performance of this businesse , deliuering the manner thereof one to another ; and though they had all seene how it was , yet euery one spake thereof a-fresh , and it seemed to them as a dreame ; some in wonder clapping their hands ; others highly extolling his valour ; one speakes with his fingers ; another stands amazed ; a third blesses himselfe ; a fourth lifts vp his arme ; a fifth acts it with his hand , all of them hauing their mouthes and their eyes full of ioy ; a sixt bowes downe his body , and suddenly leapes vp againe in the ayre ; some bend the browe , and some being ready to burst with content , make gracefull Matachines , with many other pretty Antike-gestures .

All which to Daraxa seemed so many degrees of glory ▪ Ozmin with-drew himselfe out of the Citie into certaine back-Gardens , out of which he formerly came ; and ( leauing his Horse , and changing his cloathes , with his Sword vnder his arme , returning in the habit of Ambrosio ) he came to the place ; taking his Stand where he might see what hee most desired , and was seene againe by her , who lou'd him more then her owne life . They tooke great pleasure in beholding each other ; howbeit Daraxa was very fearefull , lest some mis-fortune might befall him , standing there a-foot amongst the multitude : she made signes vnto him , that he should get vp vpon a Scaffold : but the made show that he did not vnderstand her meaning , standing there still , till the Buls began to runne .

By this time the euening was farre spent , and with the approaching of the night , those that were to sport at the juego de Cannas , made their entrance in manner following :

First of all , the Trumpets , Fifes , and Drums , accompanied with diuers other sorts of Musicke , presented themselues , being cladde in rich Liueries of sundry colours ; after whom followed the Azemilas , or Sumpter Mules , laden with bundles of Canes .

The Companies that were to maintaine this sport , were likewise eight , answering to the number of their bundles of Canes . Euery one had his Sumpter Cloth of Veluet cast ouer the Canes , richly imbroydered with the Armes of their Master in Silke and Gold , the Garrotes belonging thereunto , being all of siluer .

After these , entred two hundred and forty Gennets , richly furnished for 48. Knights , which were fiue a piece for euery man , besides that which came in with the Canes , which made vp fixe in the whole . But they that entred first on the right hand , came in two Files , opposing themselues against the aduerse part . The first two horses ( which as if they had beene yoaked together , ranne on in an euen and equall course ) were assisted by fiue others of a side , bearing their Owners Targets at the Arson of their Saddles , offering their fairest show to the eyes of the Spectators ; wherein were depainted their Emblemes and their Motto's , set forth with faire Scarfes , rich Ribbonings , Tassels and Buttons of the best both silke and gold , with sundry other borderings and costly imbroyderies , euery man suting himselfe according to his own humour , and particular fancy . Most of the Horses had their Pettrels stucke full with Bels , all their other furniture and trappings being very rich and curious , they had sumptuous head-stals of gold and siluer , set with precious Stones , as thicke as they could stand each by other : it shall suffice , for the better amplifying of what I haue spoken , that they were in Seuill , where there is no small store of them , nor make little esteeme of such things ; and that these Knights and Gentlemen were Louers , Competitors , rich , and young ; and the Lady for whom they stroue , present amongst them . These entred in at one gate of the Place , and when they had giuen it a round , they issued out at another neere vnto that by which they entred . So that the one did not hinder the other either in their comming in , or their going forth : and thus they past in very good equipage as could be desired .

The Horses hauing quit the place , these Gallants entred in againe , the whole eight squadrons running two and two together , well attired themselues , with their Liueries attending vpon them ( as before hath been deliuered ) and with their Launces in their hands , which they strongly brandishing , made the stock and point thereof seeme to meet together , whose nimble shaking caused euery single Launce to appeare to be foure . Presently vpon this , incouraging their proud Gennet with their lowd shoutes and cryes , and wounding their Sattin sides with their sharpe Spurres , you would haue thought them rather to fly , then runne ; their Masters , and they , seeming but one ioynt-body , so closely did they keepe themselues in their seates . Nor is this any Hyperbole , or ouer-indearing what was done , since that in all parts almost of Andaluzia ; as Seuill , Cordóua and Xerez de la frontera , they bring forth their children ( as it is commonly said ) from the Cradle , to the Saddle , as in other parts they accustome them to carry Canes . And it is a wonder in such tender yeeres , to see such hard steeles , and such dexterity and agility of body . For to doe these things , is an ordinary exercise amongst them . They gaue a turne about the Place , running to and fro from all the foure parts thereof : and then leauing the place for a while ( to recouer fresh breath ) and to giue some pawsing to the Spectators ) they entred againe , as before , ( changing still their Horses ) with their Targets on their armes , and their Canes in their hands .

Then they diuided themselues by sixe and sixe ( as the manner there is ) and in a handsome well-ordered fashion began their sport . Wherein hauing continued for the space of a quarter of an houre , or thereabouts , some other Gentlemen thrust in amongst them to part the quarrell , beginning with their fresh Horses a well-prepared skirmish , both the one and the other from all parts of the Place , ranging and marshalling themselues in such good array , obseruing such due both time and measure , that it seemed a very fine contriued daunce : the beholding whereof , as it held the people in suspence by possessing all their faculties ; so did it giue them singular content . But this sport was interrupted , and wholly disordered by the sudden approach of a furious Bull , which they had let loose from the other side of the place . Those that were a horsebacke , changing their Canes into Iauelins , ( which they had ready at hand ) began to cast themselues into a ring , seeking to shut him in on euery side : but the Bull stood stocke still in the midst of them , not knowing whom he should first set vpon : he cast his eyes vpon them all , tearing vp the earth with his forked feet ; and whilest euery man stood in this manner expecting his chance ; one bold Rogue amongst the rest comes athwart him , prouoking him to fury with his tottered Cloake , and his shrill shoutes , but little needed any such instigations : for the Bull presently thereupon , like one mad with rage , forsaking the horsemen , made after him with all the eagernesse he could , who tooke himselfe to his heeles as fast as they were able to carry him ; he flyes from the Bull , the Bull after him , and neuer giues him ouer , forcing him to take Sanctuary vnder Daraxa's window , iust there where Ozmin then stood ; who deeming it a place of priuiledge for this fearefull young fellow , and reputing it a kinde of iniury offered to his Lady and Mistris , if there he should receiue any ill entertainment , as likewise to himselfe , if this poore Rogue should suffer for his comming thither ; as well out of this respect , as also for that he was incensed against those , who stroue to get the honour of the day , and to winne grace by doing something brauely in her presence , breaking through the thickest of all the people , he went out against the Bull , who forsaking him he formerly followed , made directly towards himselfe . All that beheld this , thought him either foolish or mad , that should so desperately put himselfe forth to incounter with a Beast of that courage and fiercenesse , looking euery minute , when he should take him vp betweene his Hornes ; and tossing him vp aloft , breake euery bone of him in pieces . All of them with lowd voices cride out vnto him , Take heed , for the passion of God , if you loue your life , looke to your selfe ; for if you had a thousand liues , they are all in danger of losing . You may by this time imagine with your selues , what a poore taking his Spouse was in : for mine owne part I know not what to say therein , saue that she was as a woman bereft of her proper Soule , and was become an insensible body , through too much Sence . The Bull bowed downe his head for to fasten his blowe vpon him , but this was but an humbling himselfe to the sacrifice , for he neuer came to lift it vp againe . For the Moore wrything his body aside , and with extraordinary quicknesse vnsheathing his sword , acting it all in an instant , he gaue him such a cut in the neck , close vnto the horne , that parting the bones of the braine in funder , hee left his head hanging by his winde-pipe , and there he lay for dead .

This done ( as though he had done nothing ) sheathing his sword , he presently leaues the Place . But the common rout that loue nouelties , and hunger as well to heare , as to tell strange tales , ( besides many horsemen , and foot-men , that began to flock about him , to know who he was ) pressed so hard on euery side to see him , and so throng'd him both before and behind , that they had almost stiffled him , being scarce able to wagge amongst them . In the Windowes , and on the Scaffolds , began a new murmure of admiration , like vnto the former , there being a generall ioy amongst them all , for that this thing had hapned at the conclusion of these feasts , so that nothing else was talked of , saue onely those two wonderfull accidents of that Euening , doubting which were the greater of the two ; and taking in good part this second course which he set before them , hee left their palate well pleased , and their mouthes seasoned with a good rellish , to recommend such braue actions in perpetuall remembrance to all succeeding ages .

THE ARGVMENT .

The Story continues of these two illustrious Louers , Ozmin and Daraxa ; wherein is declared her sorrow , and his griefe , with diuers other accidents ; and how for to comfort and cheere vp Daraxa , there was a Tourneyment , or Iusting performed by many Knights , & Gentlemen of worth , wherein Ozmin bore away the bell , and had the glory of the day : yet all this could not make Daraxa merry .

THis day Daraxa had ( as you haue seene ) her pleasures interrupted , her ioyes intermixed with griefes , her delights false , and her contents vnsauoury : For scarce had arriued the comfort which she tooke in seeing that which she most desired , but on the sudden it was ouer-taken with feare of danger : it did likewise torment her , to thinke with her selfe , that she knew not how , nor vpon what occasion to see him once againe , nor how she might feed her fill , satisfying the hunger of her eyes , on the delicate food of her sweet desire . And because Pleasure appeares not , where Sorrow is in place , it could not be discerned in her countenance , whether these Feasts had giuen her that contentment , for which they were intended : As well for this , as for that these Gallants were somewhat more heated then before , beeing set on fire with that beautifull fayrenesse , and fayre beauty of Daraxa , desirous more then euer to entertayne her with pleasures , and that fitting occasion might be offered to come againe to the sight of her ; in this their pride of heart , and heat of blood , they ordayned a Tourney , wherein Don Rodrigo was to be the Challenger .

And some few nights after , the Challenge was publisht with great store of musicall Instruments , and bright-burning Torches , that all the streetes , together with the great Place , seemed to be all on a flame : in this solemne manner they set vp the Challenge , where it might best be seene and read of all that passed by .

There was a place for Tourneyment neere vnto the Gate , which they call the gate of Cordoua , adioyning to the wall , ( which I haue sometimes seene and well knowne , though now decayed ) where the Knights and Gentlemen went to exercise Armes , and to proue their Lances : there Don Alonso de Zunniga , being but a new beginner , did likewise practise amongst the rest , desirous to shew himselfe in this Tourney , for the great affection which hee bare to Daraxa . He was afraid he should rather lose then get honour in this Tourneyment , nor did he sticke in all Companies publikely to say as much ; not because he wanted eyther strength , or courage ; but because in all things whatsoeuer , Vse makes masteries : for they that haue onely the bare Theoricke , and naked speculation of things , be they neuer so skilfull in this their contemplatiue knowledge , they erre in their ayme , be they neuer so confident in their vnder-takings . And in this , of all other he was most vnwilling to erre , the thought whereof did much afflict him , yet made him with-all more carefull how to behaue himselfe in the businesse .

Ozmin on the other side desired to haue as few enemies as hee could , and because he might not Tourney , nor thought it possible to be admitted into the number , he would faine haue some-body to enter the Lists , that might ouer-throw Don Rodrigo's pride ; for that he was more ielous of him , then of all the rest : more to effect this his purpose , then any mind that he had therein to do his Master seruice , he spake thus vnto him :

Sir , if you be pleased to grant me free liberty of speech , I may haply deliuer that vnto you , which may be of some profit vnto you in this so honourable an occasion . Don Alonso dreaming of nothing lesse , then that he would treat with him touching such Gentleman-like exercises as these , but rather supposing that he would entertaine him with some discourse touching his Loue , sayd vnto him ; You are too slow in vnfolding your selfe , considering the haste I haue to heare thee , and the longing desire which I haue to know what it is thou wilt say vnto me .

Sir , ( quoth he ) I find , that of force you must bee present at this famous Tourneyment , the noyse whereof , as it hath filled euery mans eare , so it is now all their talke : nor do I wonder , that where the reward of a glorious name lyes at stake , men go on fearefully , out of their great desire that they haue to gaine it . I that am your poore creature , will doe you the best seruice I can , by instructing and enabling you in that which you are desirous to attayne vnto in the exercise of Horsemanship , and the vse of Armes , and that in a short time ; no way doubting but my instructions shall bring foorth good fruits of what I promise . Let not this seeme strange vnto you , nor let my youth scandall my skill ; for I must tell you , they beeing things whereunto I haue euen beene bred , they are familiar vnto mee , and I dare boldly boast my knowledge in them . Don Alonso was much ioyed in hearing him , and giuing him many thankes for this his voluntary offer of his loue and seruice : he told him ; If thou performest what thou speakest , thou shalt bind me much vnto thee . Ozmin made answere ; He that promiseth that , which he cannot performe , is as wide of his word , as he is from the worke ; and meanes nothing but deceit ; but he that stands in those tearmes , as I doe now , where trickes cannot serue the turne , he must of force , ( vnlesse he bee a foole ) accomplish more in deeds , then he promiseth in his words .

Take order , Sir , that Armes be prouided for your owne person , and mine , and then you shall quickly know , that by how much the slower I haue beene in my offer , by so much the sooner I will bring it to effect : freeing my selfe from this debt , but not from that obligation which I haue to serue you . Don Alonso presently gaue order to haue all things necessary prouided , and when they were fitted for the purpose , they went foorth to a place a part , where that day , those that followed till the determined time of the Tourneying , they spent their time in the exercises which that solemne Feast required . So that in a very short time , Alonso learn'd to keepe his seate so sure , as if hee had beene lockt to his Saddle , bearing his Lance with so gracefull a carriage , and cowching it in his wrest with so comely a diportment , as if he had many yeeres beene practised in the Feates of Armes : whereupon were very good helpes , his cleane proportion of body , accompanied with a smart and nymble kinde of strength , which gaue no small gracefull successe to his performance .

From his dexterity in vaulting on his horse , passing lightly from one Saddle to another , from his directions in his teaching , and from the shape , proportion , fashion of his body , from his behauiour , besides the garbe of Ozmins language , Don Alonço began to thinke with himselfe , that it was impossible this mans name should be Ambrosio , much lesse a Labourer , vnlesse perhaps he laboured with his wretched Fortunes , whereof hee seemed to make shew . He discouered by his actions the liuely splendour of some principall person nobly descended , who by some various successe of Fortune , wandred vp and downe in this disguise : and not being able to contayne himselfe in quiet , till he were rid of this doubt , taking him one day aside , hee spake thus in secret vnto him :

Ambrosio , it is not long that you haue serued me , but in this short time you haue beene with me , you haue bound me much vnto you : your vertues , and your noble kind of carriage speake what you are ; and therefore it is in vayne to seeke any longer to conceale your selfe : vnder the course vayle of these base and vile clothes , and vnder this poore habit , which thou now wearest , lyes hid a nobler office , and a nobler name , ( like Iewels lap 't vp in leather-Cases . ) I now know by manifest signes which I haue noted and obserued in thee , that thou doest , ( or to speake more properly ) hast deceiued me : for , that a poore Labourer , whose person you are willing to represent , should be so generall ( especially being so young ) in all kind of knowledge , but more particularly in the exercise of Armes and Horsemanship , is a thing almost ( let me call in that word againe , and say ) beyond beliefe . I haue seene in thee , and plainely perceyued , that vnder these hard clods of earth , and muddy shels , is inclosed the finest gold , and the purest orientall Pearles the world can afford . What I am , it is already well knowne vnto thee ; what thou art , I am yet to seeke ; howbeit ( as I say ) the causes are knowne by their effects , and that thou canst not any longer conceale thy selfe from me . I sweare vnto thee by the faith which I haue in Iesus Christ , and by the Order of Knight-hood which I professe and maintaine , to be thy both faithfull and secret friend , keeping that vnder the Locke of Silence , which thou shalt deposite in my bosome , assisting thee in all that I am able , both in my purse and person . Giue mee an account of thy fortune , that I may in some sort cancell the debt , wherein I stand bound vnto thee for those reall courtesies , which I haue receiued from thee . Hereunto Ozmin thus replyde :

So strongly ( Sir ) haue you coniur'd me ; so squiz'd the Grapes in the wine-presse , that you must of force wring that from my Soule , which with any other strayning in the world , saue by these the Presses of your Gentleman-like proceeding , were impossible to be drawne from me . Complying therefore with that which you command me , putting assured confidence as well in your person , as your promise , I shall giue you to vnderstand , that I am a Gentleman ; my natiue Soyle Saragoça in Aragon ; my name Iayme Uiues , which I borrowed from my father ; for so likewise was he called . It is not many yeres since , that following an occasion , ( it being the nature of young-men to bee in action ) I fell into the Moores hands , and was made a slaue , by a subtill kind of trechery , and false play of certaine fained friends ; which , whether it were occasioned through their enuy , or my misfortune , is too large a tale to tell you . It shall suffice that I deliuer vnto you , that being in their power , they sold me to a Renegado , one that had renounced his Christianity ; who , how he did vse me , it is inough to haue nam'd his condition . He led me along with him , till he had brought me to Granada , where a Gentleman bought mee , called Zegri , one of the principallest persons in that City . This man had a sonne of the same yeeres with my selfe , whose name was Ozmin , who because he was the very picture of my selfe , as well in age , as in stature , feature , fauour , condition , and all things else whatsoeuer : for that I did so truly resemble him , he was the more desirous to buy me , and to vse me the better , that it might breed the greater fastnesse and friendship betweene vs . I taught him all I could or knew , according as my selfe had learned of my friends at home in mine owne Country , which was the more perfected in mee by the frequent practice of such like exercises , being of that common vse with vs , as nothing more . From whence I reaped no small benefit ; for , by conuersing with my Masters sonne , my knowledge was thereby increased , which otherwise I might haply haue forgot : and experience teacheth vs , That men by teaching , come to learne . Hence grew to be refined both in the sonne and father , that affection which they bore vnto me ; trusting me with their persons and wealth ; so much did they rely vpon my truth and honesty .

This young Gentleman was a Suitour to Daraxa , daughter to the Alcalde de Baça ; ( my Mistresse , whom you so much adore : ) the marriage was treated of , and vpon the point to take effect ; for the Articles of agreement were already drawne , and no doubt the match ere this had beene concluded , had not the warres hindred it , and the present siege that was then layd vnto it , wherby they were forced to deferre it till some fitter time .

Baça was shortly after yeelded vp , by occasion whereof , this intended Marriage hung in suspence . And because I was then Dominus Fac-totum , and the onely man in fauour and trust with them , I went and came with presents , and other inter-changeable kindnesses , from the one City to the other : it being my good fortune to be in Baça at that time , when it was rendred vp ; and so I recouered my liberty , together with many other Captiues . I would faine haue returned home to mine owne Countrey , but I wanted money : In the end I had notice , that a Kinsman of mine was abiding in this City . Two things did concurre to draw me hither ; the desire I had to see this place , ( being so noble and magnificent a City ) and the supplying of my wants , the better to performe my Iourney . I continued here a great while , without finding him , that I sought for : for hearing no newes of him , but such as were vncertaine , it turned to my vtter vn-doing ; by finding that which I did not seeke for , as in such cases it commonly falleth out . I went wandring vp and downe the City , and hauing little money , and much care , it was my happe to meete with a rare piece of Nature , an admirable Beauty ; ( at least in my eye , howsoeuer in other it might be otherwise ) but that 's all one , beeing that is onely faire , which most pleaseth . To her I deliuered vp all my faculties , leauing to my selfe not one of them to liue with me : I made now no more any reckoning of my selfe , nor possessed any thing which was not hers . This faire workmanship is Donna Elvira , sister to Don Rodrigo , and daughter to Don Luys de Padilla , my old Master . And because counsell ( as the saying is ) springeth from necessity , seeing my selfe so wholly lost in her loue , and not finding any meanes to manifest my affection , together with the quality of my person , I held it my best course to write Letters vnto my father of the recouery of my liberty , and that I was indebted in a thousand double Ducats ; and that he would be pleased to supply me with so much moneys for my reliefe . Which businesse succeeded well ; for hauing sent me the whole Summe , and a seruant with a horse for my iourney , I put my selfe into good Cloathes , and fitted my selfe with all things necessary according to mine owne mind . The two or three first dayes I began to make that street my walke , giuing many a turne at all howers of the day , but could neuer haue the happinesse to see her . Now , from my continuall walking that way , I began by some suspicious people to be obserued , who seemed to haue a watchfull eye ouer me ; wherefore , for the auoyding of Spyes , I with-drew my selfe from my wonted walke , and betooke my selfe to a more retired course of life .

My seruant ( to whom I imparted my Loue-businesses ) thinking vpon some course for me , aduised me ( as beeing elder and better experienced then my selfe ) finding a certaine piece of Worke going forward in my Lords house , to suite my selfe like a day-Labourer , and to change my name , that I might not be knowne , and so ranke my selfe amongst the rest , that are hired to digge and carry away the rubbish from the Masons worke . I began to consider with my selfe , what might happen thereupon ; but because Loue ouer comes all difficulties , and Death is too weake an aduersary to withstand its force , all feare was layd aside , euery thing seemed easie vnto me , I put on a resolution to entertaine his aduice , and so I did accordingly . At that time there befell mee an vn-expected accident , which was this ; When the Worke was finished , they receiu'd me into the house to be their Gardiner . Then , & neuer till then , was that happy day that I long looked for : my Moone was now come to her Full ; and I was now climing to the height of my good fortune : for the very first day that I supplyde that place , and had but newly set foot within the garden , I luckily met with Daraxa ; she wondred to see me there , and I no lesse to behold her . We gaue an account each to other of our liues , relating our mutuall misfortunes ; she recounting hers , and I mine ; not sticking to tell her , how farre I was in loue with her friend , and in what fast Fetters she held my heart : intreating her withall , that since shee had such cleare knowledge both of my parents and selfe , and how nobly I was descended , she would bee pleased to fauour my pretension , and to worke so with her by her good intercession , that I might come ( by the holy Rite of Marriage ) to enioy the fruit of my hopes . She promised she would , and did ( I assure my selfe ) all that in her lay to accomplish my desire . But because Fortune was euermore too too niggardly-handed towards mee , when these our tender loues ( like young Plants ) began to gather a little strength , and were in the way to shoot vp higher ; the sprigs being rent off , the bud was blasted with a sharpe Easterly wind , and some malicious Worme lay gnawing at the root , till at last it withered to nothing , and was quite consumed : for I was on the sudden banished the house , not knowing why , nor wherefore ; falling thus from the highest top of happinesse , to the lowest depth of misery . He that with the stroke of a Launce kill'd the first Bull , hee that with the edge of his sword made the other fall dead at his foot , was my selfe . She saw me well inough , and knew me too , and was not a little glad of it , which I did plainely reade in her looks , and her eyes did expresse it to the life . And in this occasion ( if it were possible ) I would likewise striue to make some notable proofe for to please my Mistris , who shall eternize my actions , by giuing the world to vnderstand who I am , and at what valuation I ought to be rated amongst the rest . My inability to execute this my desire , makes me euen ready to burst with griefe ; and if I could purchase it with my bloud , I would willingly let loose the Sluces of my veines to obtaine my wished end . Thus ( Sir ) you see , I haue freely laid open vnto you the whole successe of my loue , I haue giuen you a true account of it , there remaining nothing to my selfe in the reckoning , saue a grosse summe of disgraces . And with that word he stopt .

Don Alonso , who listned earnestly all this while vnto him , when his eares were let loose ( for t'others tongue had tyde them to his mouth ) threw his armes about his necke , clasping him close vnto him with streight imbracements : Whilst Ozmin in the meane while stroue to kisse his hands , but hee would not suffer him so to doe , saying ; These hands and armes are to bee imployed in thy seruice , that they may thereby deserue to gaine thine . It is no time now to vse compliments , nor to alter as yet the courses you haue hitherto held , seeing your owne will is not in disposition to doe otherwise . As for the Tourneyment , let that neuer trouble your thoughts , for you shall enter in with the rest , and doubt you not of it , for it shall be so ; therefore plucke vp your spirits , and set your heart at rest . Ozmin once more made offer to kisse his hands , humbling his knee on the ground . Don Alonso did the like , making many proffers of preuention : so forcibly did this new bond of friendship tye them each to other . Thus they past in large conuersation the rest of those dayes that remained , till the very time and houre , wherein the Tourneyment was to be performed .

I told you before , how that Don Rodrigo for his great arrogancie , was secretly misliked by most of these Gallants . And therefore Don Alonso thought with himselfe that he had now met with that he desired . For Iayme Viues entring into the Tourney , he was wel assured , that he would eclypse his honour , and beat downe his pride . Ozmin for his part likewise did desire it as much . And before the houre of arming was come , that he might see Daraxa enter the place , he walked vp and downe there a while , wondring to see it so richly adorned : the Hangings of Cloth of Gold and of Silke , were such and so many , as are vnable to be expressed ; such variety was there in the colours ; such curiositie in the windowes ; such beauty in the Ladies ; such richnesse in their dressings , and their cloathes ; such concourse of all sorts of Gallants , that all being put together , seemed to be one inestimable Iewell ; and euery particular by it selfe , a precious Stone set therein . The Tilt-yard , which diuided the Place into two equall parts , ranne quite athwart the midst of it ; and in a conuenient place was a Scaffold set vp for the Iudges , right ouer against the which were the windowes appointed for Daraxa and Donna Elvira , who vpon two white Palfreys , their furniture being blacke Veluet set with siluer Oes , and sutably frindged , entred well attended : Who after they had rounded the Place , tooke their Seates . Where Ozmin leauing her , hasted away , because anon after , the Challengers were to enter ; who within a little space made their arriuall , wonderfull well set foorth , and in very good equipage . The Ho-boyes , the Trumpets , and other instruments of Musicke sounded without ceasing , till they were seated in their places . Afterwards entred the Defendants , and Don Alonso was one of the first ; who hauing performed his three courses , and those singular well ( that few did better ) he presently returned home .

Hauing before obtained licence for a Caualeere , a friend of his , whom hee expected from Xeres de la frontera , Ozmin in the meane while attending his comming . They came in both together to the place ; and Alonso being his Padrino , presented him vnto them . The Moores Armes were all blacke , his Horse sutable , without any plume in his Helmet ; instead whereof with great curiosity , he had made a Rose of Daraxa's Handkercher , which was an assured token , whereby she might know him . He put himselfe in his posture , and as good lucke would haue it , he was to runne his first Launce against one of the Challengers Abettors : The signall was giuen , they made their Carreere , Ozmin hits his Aduersary on the Beuer , where hee brake his Launce ; and giuing him a counter-buffe with the Truncheon of his Staffe , he remoued him from his Saddle , and fell with that stroke to the ground ouer his horse crupper , but he had no other harme , saue what he suffered with the weight of his Armour . For the two last courses , Don Rodrigo put himselfe forth , who lighted with his first Launce on the left arme of the Moore , neere vnto the shoulder , remaining wounded by him in the pouldrons on the right side , where he brake his staffe in three pieces . With the last Don Rodrigo mist and Ozmin brake his neere the sight of his Helmet , where hee left behinde him a great splinter of his Launce ; so that it was generally thought , that he had shrewdly wounded him ; but his Helmet defended him so well , that he had no great harme .

The Moore hauing broken his three Launces , went his way wonderfully ioyed with his Victory ; but much more Don Alonso who had brought him as his Champion into the field , and could not finde any place large inough to intertaine his ioy . They quitted the Place , and went home to his house to disarme himselfe , suffering no man else to see his face . And putting on his ordinary apparell , he secretly went out at a posterne doore on the backside of the house , returning to behold his deare Daraxa , and to see that which passed in the Tilt-yard . Hee had gotten so neere vnto his Mistris , that they might in a manner haue shaken hands : they looked steadily each on other , but he euermore bare his eyes sadly , and with a heauy cheere ; but she beyond all degrees of sadnesse , supposing that the cause of his sorrow might be , that she had not cheered him with some gracious cast of her eye . Nor could shee tell what to thinke , so much was she amazed , to see him Tilt in blacke both Horse and Armour , being it is a signe amongst them of euill lucke . All this put together , wrought in her a most deepe melancholly , and continued so extremely passionate therein , and was so surcharged with sorrow , that the sports being scarce ended , her heart trembling in her body , shee left her window , and hastned home . They which did accompany her , did much maruell that she went away no better pleased , seeming to take no contentment in what was done , and withall began to murmure and mutter amongst themselues , euery one suspecting that , which his owne malice did suggest vnto him .

Don Luys , like a wise Gentleman , as oft as he heard any reasoning thereof , spake still in her excuse ; the like he did with his sonnes that Euening , when he found them grumbling at her carriage , telling them that an afflicted soule weepes in the midst of mirth , and that there is not any thing that can minister matter of ioy and gladnes to man or woman , that is absent from those , whom they best affect . Good things are so much the more esteemed , by how much the more we inioy them with knowne persons , and our particular acquaintance .

Towards strangers , there may ( no doubt ) be many intertainments giuen to moue pleasure and delight ; but ( alas ) they haue no feeling of them ; their thoughts are otherwise taken vp , and in them the increase of sorrow is so much the more , by how much in others they see the greater ioy . I blame her not for it , nor doe I thinke it a thing so strange ; but rather imagine it to haue proceeded from her great prudence , then any dislike she had of our sports , and doe meerely attribute it to her graue and sober behauiour ; whereas the contrary would haue argued too much lightnesse , and an vnsettled kind of carriage , which imputation , women that prize their vertue and goodnesse , study to auoid . Besides , she is farre from father and mother , and from her best-beloued ; and ( though free in her vsage ) yet a Captiue in her condition , and that in a strange Country , not knowing how to remedy her selfe , nor when she shall finde the meanes . Let euery man examine his owne bosome , let him but make her case his owne , and then hee will tell mee another tale , and ingenuously confesse , that he should finde himselfe affected , iust as she is now . And in doing otherwise , is ( as it is with him that is in health ) to bid the sicke to eate and be well .

This discourse hauing past in secret amongst them , they treated afterwards in publike of the Zerezano , how brauely hee had behau'd himselfe that day ; and how ( albeit they desired much to know who he was ) they could neuer get any more out of Don Alonso , then what he told them at first , and they beleeued it was true . Daraxa's melancholly increased dayly more & more , but the cause thereof none could guesse aright : they were all wide of the marke , none came neere the Butt : of all that shot their bolts ; some fell too short , and some flew ouer . All did iudge amisse , inuenting in the meane time all the entertainments their wits could deuise to giue her content : but should they haue broken their braines in the study thereof , they had neuer been neerer their purpose : for she was as farre from being capable of the delights they deuised for her , as they were from entring within the Circle of her desires .

THE ARGVMENT .

Continuing the Story of the noble loues of these two disconsolate Louers , it is now recounted how Don Luys , for to cheere vp the gentle Daraxa , brought her to a pleasant Village , whither Ozmin repairing , was set vpon by a company of Clownes . And in the defence of himselfe he slewe foure of them outright , and wounded many others . For the which fact he was committed to prison , and sentenced to death ; together with the diuers and sundry accidents that insued thereupon ; and how in the end hee was set at liberty . And how himselfe and Daraxa turning Christians , their happy Nuptials were solemnly celebrated in the presence of the King and Queene of Spaine .

DON LVYS had a house in Axarafe , and other possessions belonging thereunto , by the vert ue of his Mayorasgoship , in a little Village appertaining to Seuill . The season was temperate , beeing then about February , at which time the Fields seeme to put on their new apparell ; thither they agreed to goe to make merry , and to recreate themselues for some few dayes , that they might not leaue this path vntroden , to see if by this meanes they could diuert her sorrowes . With this shee seemed somewhat pleased , and made shew of better cheerefulnes then before ; supposing , if she went forth of the Citie , shee should finde some meanes or other , to see and speake with Ozmin . They made ready their Recamara , and all fitting prouision for such a businesse : and it was good sport to behold the hurly burly and confused noise amongst them , as of him that had the charge of Gray-hounds , of that other , that was to goe along with the setting dogs , the Tumblers , and the Kennell of the hounds ; of a third , that carried Hawkes a-field ; of this man bearing the Owle , that his Peece on his shoulder ; of some with Crossebowes in their hands ; othersome with Mules laden with Bedding , Hangings , and other houshold-stuffe , and all of them trooping together , laughing and making themselues merry with the conceiued ioy of this Feast .

Don Alonso hauing notice hereof , comes me to Ozmin , and tels him that their Mistresses were gone abroad into the Country to take the ayre , and disport themselues , and that they were to remaine there some time : but when they would returne againe , that he knew not . This newes was nothing displeasing vnto them for two respects : the one , for that they might ( happely ) meet there with the fewer Competitors in the pursuit of their Loues ; the other , that they might haue the better occasion not to be knowne . The nights were neither cleere , nor darke , nor cold , nor hot ; but with a pleasant noise of stilnesse , and delicate darke clearenesse , heau'n and earth were both so ouer-spred , that the heart of man could not imagine a fitter night for the purpose .

These two louing friends , and friendly Louers , agreed to try their fortunes , and to see what prize they could make in the choise of two such rich Bottomes as these were , laden with so much Honour , Beauty , and Wealth , the greatest treasure the world can afford . They disguised themselues , apparelling their bodies with good honest Country cloathes , like plaine Husbandmen , and set forth about Sun-set vpon two hackney Iades ; and when they came neere vnto the Village , some quarter of a League , or there-abouts , they alighted at a certaine Farme-house ; to the end , that by marching thus on foot , the lesser notice might be taken of them . Which might then haue fell out very happily for them , if Fortune had not wheeled her selfe about , and turned her back towards them ; for they arriued in very good time , euen then when their Ladies were in the Balcon intertaining discourse , wholly fitting themselues for conuersation , and mirth , as the company , or occasion should giue cause .

Don Alonso durst not draw too neere , for feare of frighting the game ; and therefore intreated his Companion to make the winde-lase , and to negotiate alone for them both ; because he being beloued of Donna Eluira , and well knowne to Daraxa , he had no reason to hide himselfe from them . Ozmin then by degrees , ( with a carefull kinde of carelesnesse ) stole neerer and neerer , singing in a low Base as it were , humming betweene the teeth an Arabique song ; which ( to those that vnderstood the language ) were cleere notes : But to those that knew it not , and were neglectfull thereof , it seemed no more then an ordinary La , La , La. Donna Elvira ( hearkening vnto him ) told Daraxa ; Euen on these rude kinde of people God hath bestow'd his gifts , if they knew well how to vse them . Doe you not obserue that sauage fellow , what a sweet and well-tuned voice he hath ; and how he rellisheth and ayreth his notes , and how merrily he chants it , as if his mother had brought him into the world with a prick-song ? But this is in him as water that raines it selfe into the Sea without any profit . By this you see ( said Daraxa ) that all things are esteemed according to the subiect wherein they subsist . These country Clownes , if in their tender age they be not trans-planted into a political & Ciuill life : and if they be not remoued and changed from their barren , to better grounds , and wholly stript of that rugged bark , wherin they are born , it is a thousand to one if euer they come to be well behau'd . Whereas on the contrary , those that are Citizens , and naturally of a good disposition , are like the Vine , which if it continue a yeere vndrest and vntrim'd , it yeeldeth fruit notwithstanding , though it be but a little : but if you returne to prune and husband it aright , it acknowledgeth the good it hath receiued , and renders a very large and thankefull recompence . But this fellow that sings heere now , is such a knotty piece of Timber , such an arrant Clowne , that the best Carpenter in the world cannot with his Axe nor his Plainer , hewe him into fashion , or shaue him to any smoothnesse of ciuill carriage , but for euer remaine an vnprofitable blocke . It is a torment to me to heare this Turtle sing ; if it please you , let vs go hence , for it is time to with-draw our selues , that we may take our rest .

The Louers well vnderstood one another ; she the Song , and he her words ; and to what end she spake them . The rest of the Ladies went their way , only Daraxa remained a little behind after the rest , and speaking to him in the Arabicke tongue , will'd him to stay there : where he stood waiting for her , and in the meane while , walked carelesly vp and downe , but still with an eye towards the Window , to see when she should make her returne .

The baser sort of people , ( by a secret kind of instinct ) do euermore beare a naturall hatred to those that are Noble ; as the Lyzard to the Snake , the Swan to the Eagle , the Cocke to the a a Francolino . Phesant , the Crab to the Cuttle-fish , the Dolphin to the Whale , Oyle to Pitch , the Vine to the Cole-wort , and the like . And if you aske , ( as desirous to know , what is the naturall cause thereof , ) I can shew you no other reason for it , more then that the Adamant drawes vnto it the Yron that the Marygold followes the Sunne , the Basiliske kills by Looking , and Swallow ▪ wort helpes the Sight . For as some things naturally loue one another , so othersome hate and abhorre by a celestiall influence ; the reason whereof mortall men haue not to this day beene able to reach vnto . And that things of diuers kinds haue this property , it is no wonder , because they consist of differing compositions , dispositions , and inclinations in nature : but that reasonable men , both t 'one and t' other , molded of one and the same earth , of one flesh , of one blood , of one beginning , created-forme , and the selfe-same end , liuing vnder one selfe-same Law , beeing of one and the same Religion , and all of them in all and euery part , ( as farre-foorth as they are men ) so one selfe-same substance ; that out of that Similiancy , man naturally loues man : that yet ( I say ) there should be that contrariety and vnsauorie taste ; that this Raskallity , and base off-scumme of the earth , more hard then Flint , or the Gallician Nut , should persecute the Nobility with that vehemencie as they do , is a matter to me of great admiration .

That night certaine young Lads of the Parish likewise walked abroad , and lighted by chance vpon these two Strangers : and at the very first incounter , without any cause or reason in the world ; no occasion being giuen them , began to flocke together ; and gathering themselues into a ring , beganne to cry amaine ; A Woolfe , a Woolfe , the Woolfe is come : and throwing therewithall little stones by hand-fuls on their heads , ( as they had showred down from heauen ) they shrewdly be-pelted their Pates : so that they were forced to flie , vnable to make any longer stay , their intertainment was so bad . And so they returned without any more ado , Ozmin being dis-appointed ( which did much grieue him ) of taking his leaue of his Mistresse . They went thither where their horses stood ; and on them to the City , with purpose to returne late againe in the night that they might not bee discouered . But this forecast stood them in little stead : for if Lightning and Thunder should haue fallen from heauen , and though they knew it should either burne or dash them in pieces , there was one Rogue amongst the rest , that would rather lose his life , then carry himselfe ciuilly towards them ; and onely out of no other end but to do mischiefe and villany . Scarce had they the next night following set foot in the Village , but that a knot of these mad-caps being met together , and knowing them to be the very same whom they abused the night before , one with a Sling , another with a Yard , this man with a Bore-speare , that with a Batt , some with Staues , some with Spits , not sparing so much as the Peele and Maulkin of their Ouens , ( as if they were to go out against a mad Dog ) they ioyntly set vpon them : but they found them better prouided then they were the night before ; for they had brought with them good Iackes of Male , and steele Murrians , and strong Bucklers . On the one side you might see stones , Cudgels , and lowd showtes ; and on the other , many strong blowes , and cutting slashes with the sword ; and on both such a tumult , and such a stirre , that with the noyse thereof , the whole Village seemed to be vp in armes ; so like a little warre did this fierce fight appeare . Don Alonso , in crossing the street , was vn-awares with an vnluckie stone strooke on the brest , and fell to the ground , wanting strength to recouer himselfe to returne afresh to the fight . Wherefore as well as he could , he crawled vp , and with-drew himselfe aside , while Ozmin in the meane time draue them vp before him in the street , working them much harme : for some of them ( and those not a few ) were sore hurt , and three left dead in the place . The tumult increasing , all the whole Village came out at once , and stopt the passage , that he could not , though he would neuer so faine , haue fled from them . There was got now on the one side of him a Turfe-breaker , a sturdy stout Rogue , who with the Barre of a doore strooke him such a cruell blow on the shoulder , that he forc't him vpon his knees : but it did nothing benefit him , that he was the Alcalde's sonne ; for before that he could come to double his blow vpon him , ( which he was about to do ) he gaue him such a slash , that he claue his head in twaine , as it had bin of a Kid or a Calfe , leauing him lying like a Tunny on the shore , hauing rendred vp his life in satisfaction of his Roguery . So many charged him on euery side , and laid such load vpon him , that being vnable any longer to defend himselfe , he was taken by them .

Daraxa and Donna Elvira , saw & heard all that had past between them , ( but with much sorrow to see such vnciuil out-rage ) euen from the very first beginning of the Fray , as also what a coyle they kept , when they had caught him thus aliue , and had him in their hold , and how they bound his hands behind him with a Cord , as if he had beene one of their fellow-rogues . All of them on all sides intreated him ill ; one buffetted him , another puncht him , a third kickt him , throwing on him a thousand disgracefull affronts , wherewith they sought to be reuenged on him for all the wrongs he did them , who ( before he was their prisoner ) durst not looke him in the face .

What a beastly and a shamefull thing was this , to vse a man thus , when he was not able to make resistance , his hands being bound to the peace ? A thing neuer to be done by any , but such base Villaines , and dogged Clownes , which kind of coorse vsage is naturall and proper vnto them . But what becomes now of Daraxa ? how does she brooke this misfortune ? how is she able without swouning , to see his person thus basely abused , who did so much loue and adore his shadow ? on the one side to see him prisoner , on the other , to see some wounded , and some slaine , and her honour lying in the midst betweene them both ? for she knew well enough , when the case should bee layd open , Don Luys of force could not but aske , what Ambrosio made there , and what occasion drew him thither .

In this confusion , necessity draue her to sit in councell with her selfe what course were best to be taken . To preuent therefore farther mischiefe , she deuised a Letter , which when she had sealed , she lockt it vp in a little Cabinet that she had , to the intent that when Don Luys should come vnto her , shee might make shew thereof for her owne discharge .

Now by this time the day began to appeare , and yet the people were not quieted . They had sent vnto the City to giue notice of what had happened , to the end that information might be taken how things had past , and to open the businesse . And when the Notary was come , they began to examine Witnesses ; whereof many ( without being called ) made their voluntary appearance . For ill men , of themselues inuite themselues vnbidden , onely out of a desire to do that is ill : and of enemies , become friends , to condemne the innocent . Some sware that Ozmin had sixe or seuen , besides himselfe in his company ; others , that he was seene to come out of Don Luys his house , and that some cryde out of the window , Kill them , kill them . Others , that the people of the Towne resting secure and quiet , they wilfully set vpon them ; others , that they came and challenged them out of their houses ; there not being one man amongst them all that sware a truth . God deliuer vs from such Clownes , for they are as stiffe as Oakes , and of the same toughnesse of nature , cruell , and hard-hearted : if you will haue any fruit from them , they must bee vsed like Akornes , beaten downe with Cudgels and dry blowes ; for they will sooner suffer themselues to be pluckt vp by the rootes , though it be to the vtter ruine of themselues , and their estates , then to bow or stoope , bee it neuer so little . And if they be once minded to persecute a man , they will periure themselues a thousand times , though the matter in question be not worth a straw , onely out of an inclination to doe that which is euill . And the ill is so much the worse , that these wretches thinke , that they do God good seruice therein , and that their soules are saued by it : and it is a wonder , if they confesse their fault , and repent themselues of this their rancour and malicious poyson . The deaths and wounds receiued , were prou'd vpon him , and the poore Gentleman laden with yrons , and put in safe custody . Don Luys , as soone as he had notice hereof , hastened to the Village , his daughter informed him of the businesse , acquainting him truly with all that had past : he inquired likewise of Daraxa , who told him the same tale , and that she had sent for Ambrosio to come thither , for to dispatch him thence with Letters for Granada , and before that he could get to speake with her , they had these two nights together beaten him with Cudgels , and pelted him with stones ; so that , though her Letters were written , and lay ready for him , shee could not come to deliuer them into his hands . Don Luys desired her , that she would shew him the Letter , as well to see the contents thereof , as also for his owne discharge , she being by their Maiesties committed to his custody . Shee ( though she seemed loth so to do ) condescended at last to his request , and gaue him the Letter , how beit little intreaty would haue serued the turne ; for she desired nothing more , then to haue him see what she had writt . And taking it from foorth her Cabinet , she sayd vnto him ; I giue it vnto you , that you may perceiue my truth , and conceiue no ielousie , that I write any thing worthy the hiding from you . Don Luys tooke the Letter , and going to reade it , found that it was written in the Arabicke tongue , wherein he had no knowledge . Hee then made inquirie for one that could reade and interpret that Language ; the Contents whereof were , that she signified vnto her father , what a griefe it was vnto her , to liue thus diuided from him ; and that she desired to be certified of his welfare ; and if the desire she had to see him did not ouer-sway all other respects , she liu'd otherwise in as full content as any woman in the world , being more made of by Don Luys , then any of his owne children : And therefore besought him , that in acknowledgement of this his kindnesse , and courteous intertainment , he would be pleased to remember him with some Present worthy his desert .

And because in such like hurly-burlies as these , words multiply more and more , and together with the stirre , reports , gather-strength , and increase ; and for that euery one canonizeth his owne presumption , according as hee is in loue with it , they began to murmure against Don Luys , and the people of his house . The Mustard was got vp already into their Noses , and their fingers began to itch ; but he , like a wise and discreet Gentleman , ( as he was ) thought fit for the present to dissemble the matter ; and seeming to take little notice of their malicious proceeding , he remoued his whole houshold , and returned backe to the City .

Now , whilest these things thus succeeded , Granada had yeelded her selfe to the Conquerours , vpon such conditions as the Chronicles mention , and as by our fore-fathers hath beene reported vnto vs . Amongst those other Nobles that were found there at that time , were the two fellow-father-inlawes , Alboaçen father to Ozmin , and the Alcayde de Baça : both which besought to be baptized , desirous to become Christians : which Ceremonie being performed , the Alcayde intreated their Maiesties hee might haue licence to goe see his daughter Daraxa : which being granted , they tolde him he should be aduised from them ere long , how and when it should be . Alboaçen thinking that his sonne was dead , or taken Captiue , vsed all diligence to know what was become of him , but he could neuer get any inkling thereof . For the which ( as he had good reason so to be ) he was wondrous sad , not onely as he was his onely child , but being also such a sonne , so well qualified as he was , and descended of such rich and noble Parents , the onely hope of their House . The Alcayde had no lesse feeling of it then he , as well for that he loued him as dearely , as if he had beene his owne ; as also for the griefe Daraxa would conceiue , when she should come to heare the tidings of this heauy newes . Their Maiesties on their part had dispatcht a messenger vnto Seuill with expresse command , that Don Luys should presently without delay repaire vnto them , and bring Daraxa along with him ; with that respect and good vsage , wher-withall they had put him in trust .

Vpon the receipt of these Letters , she ( being acquainted what order was giuen ) was at her wits end , and ready to runne mad , because of force , vpon this occasion , she was to depart , grieuing thus to go away , before she should see an end of this businesse not knowing what would become of it ; and sorrowing beyond measure that her dearest Loue should be left behind her in prison ; and that now when he had most need of her helpe , she must in this his greatest extremity , be driuen to leaue him to shift for himselfe . Her thoughts were all in a confusion , her imagination was troubled and her heart ( through the weight of her griefes ) as heauy as Lead , calling her selfe a thousand times more vnfortunate , then Misfortune it selfe , and of all other the most wretched woman .

She was resoluing to finish all at once , and together with her Loue , to lose her life , with a perplexed , but almost-settled mind , it was in her deliberation to haue acted a most cruell errour vpon her selfe , in token of that chaste and true loue which she bare to Ozmin . But Daraxa , whose passion had not quite out-gone her iudgement , like a discreet Lady , ( as she was ) correcting her cruell determinations , taking vp her selfe when she was in the height of her speed , she resolued to trust her misfortunes in the hands of Fortune her enemy , expecting what-euer she would giue them ; and being that the vtmost euill , was death , she would not despaire of the game till she saw the last man borne . But this resolution of sufferance could not stop a sea of teares , which burst with a swelling Tide from foorth her eyes . The standers by , supposed this to proceed out of her ouer-ioy , that she was to returne to her owne Country , but they were all deceiued , so that euery one spake to her , but none did comfort her . Don Rodrigo came to take his leaue of her , who with a countenance bathed with those cristalline teares , which dropped from her heauenly eyes , spake vnto him in this manner following :

Noble Don Rodrigo , I might very well seeke to perswade you with abundance of reasons to that good worke , which vpon this present occasion I pretend to present vnto you , and to craue your furtherance therein . Which in its owne nature is so iust , that I cannot forbeare to aske it , nor you to grant it , being that your selfe is so much interessed therein : you know ( though I should not tell you ) the obligation we haue to do good ; which as a naturall and diuine Law speaketh particularly to euery mans soule and conscience . Nor is there any man so barbarous , that is ignorant thereof : and this carries somuch the more force with it , by how much the stronger the reasons are that are alledged ; amongst the which , a principal one , and not the least , is , that we apply this good vnto those , that haue eaten of our bread , and been intertained in our seruice . And because I know you can not be vnlike your selfe , my intercession may seeme the lesse needfull . But that which I shall intreat at your hands , is this : You know , that Ambrosio was seruant to both our fathers : first to mine , then to yours : And therefore we are both bound ( but I the more ) to doe for him ; hauing put himselfe through my default in that necessity , wherin now he is , the cause in hand no otherwise concerning him , but as I was interessed in the busines . By my hand he was thrust into this danger , I was the sole causer of it ; and therefore I stand charged with it , and must put it to my account . If you will therefore free me from this debt ; if you desire to giue me content ; if you purpose to binde me vnto you , that I may for euer remaine the thankefull acknowledger of your loue and kindnesse , it must be , that by laying vpon your shoulders this weighty care of mine owne desire , that you seeke by all meanes to procure his liberty , which in the reckoning is mine ; and my request vnto you is , that you indeuour it with that earnestnesse , as I doe desire it . Don Luys , ( whom I haue euer found my singular good Lord ) will , before I goe hence , vse all possible diligence in his owne person , with his friends and kinsfolke ; that the one ayding the other in his absence , may free mee of this debt , for the which I stand ingaged . Don Rodrigo promised to do his best , and so they parted .

Now , for that this poore Lady had left her best beloued in this great perill of his life , she was much grieued ; and by so much the more , by how much the farther she was from him ; so that when shee came to Granada , shee did not seeme to be the same she was .

Don Alonso , though he had escaped their hands , yet being sorely bruised in his brest , he was forced to keepe his bed , so soundly had the Clownes bang'd him . But when he afterwards heard , that his Companion was carried prisoner to Seuill , he got him out of his bed , posted thither , tooke infinit paines , trotting vp and downe , and neuer ceasing to sollicit his friends cause , as if the case had been his owne . Notwithstanding , what with the complaint of the Plaintifes ; the accusation of Witnesses ; the euill inclination of the Iudges , ( either vpon information , or corruption ; not fauouring the Defendant , ) besides the slaine and wounded ( which were many ) he could not saue him , together with diuers other his good friends , from being condemned to be hanged at the common Gallowes .

Don Rodrigo was in a great rage , that his father and himselfe should find so little respect , as to hang vp a seruant of theirs , that had not offended the Law , had he had equall hearing , and a faire tryall . On the other side , Don Alonso stood much in maintenance of the Defendant , saying , that it was not to bee permitted ; nor could the Law condemne a Gentleman , so nobly descended as his friend Iayme Uiues was , to be hanged : And that in case the fault were farre greater , yet the difference of quality ought to saue his life : At least it ought to priuiledge him from hanging , it being the Law , that , in matters deseruing death , Gentlemen should not be hanged , but be-headed . The Iudges and the rest of the Bench were distracted in this Case , and knew not what they were best to doe . Don Rodrigo , he stiles him his seruant ; Don Alonço , his friend ; Don Rodrigo pleades for him by the name of Ambrosio , and Don Alonço , by that of Iayme Viues , a Gentleman of Zaragosa ; who , at the feast of their Buls , had made such noble proofe of his Valour , as the whole Citie could well witnesse : And that in the Turnament ( he being his Padrino , or Champion that brought him in ) vn-horst one of the Challengers , shewing that day great tokens of his worth and Valour . The difference was so great , the names so contrary ; the qualities alledged so discrepant ; that the Iudges , to cleere this doubt , resolued with themselues to take declaration thereof from himselfe . They demanded then of him , whether he were a Gentleman or no ? Hee answered that he was nobly descended , & of Royall Bloud , but that his name was neither Ambrosio , nor Iayme Viues . Then they willed him , that hee should manifest his name , and the quality of his person . Whereunto he made answer , that his punishment might excuse him for not discouering himselfe ; and being that he was vndoubtedly to dye , it was no more necessary to tell it them , then it was materiall , to suffer either the one , or the other death . Then they desired him to deliuer , whether hee were the same man Don Alonço had reported , which had so brauely kill'd the two Buls , and gotten such honour in the Tourneyment .

He replide he was ; but that he had neither of those names , whereby they called him . And because he was so loth to declare his Linage ( conceiuing him thereby to be a man of quality , ) they demurred vpon the busines , to see if they could worke the truth out of him , to know who he was ; as also to winde out the reasons , why these two noble Gentlemen should so earnestly vndertake his defence . And which did not a little startle them ; they saw the whole City did generally desire his liberty , & stood strongly affected towards him . Hereupon they dispatched some presently away for Zaragosa , that they might learne out the truth , & giue knowledge of his Birth . But hauing spent some dayes therein , and vsed many diligencies , they could not meet with any ( for all their strict inquiry , ) that could giue them notice who he might be , nor could deuise what manner of Gentleman he might be , either by his name , or any signes or tokens by them giuen , who failed not to describe him at full vnto them . Being returned with this ill Dispatch , albeit his friends did much importune for him , and the Magistrates of Iustice did often require him , that he would lay open his quality and condition , yet he would not do it , nor was it possible to perswade him thereunto . So the Iudges ( the time limited being fully expired for farther respite ) sore against their will , much pittying both his Youth and Valour , not being able to crosse the course of Iustice , being prest so earnestly by the importunity of the aduerse party , they confirmed their former fentence .

Daraxa , nor the two fathers were asleepe , whilest these things were in doing ; for they had made their Maiesties acquainted with the whole carriage of the businesse , & were by them informed of the truth thereof . Many petitions they put vp , and no sooner one Memoriall giuen , but another was a drawing to second their fuit : Daraxa , she in her owne person did sollicit the life of her espoused husband , begging it by the way of merced and grace : But their Maiesties answered nothing thereunto . Yet secretly they dispatched Don Luys presently away , with their kingly prouision to the Iudges , that they should deliuer vnto him the Bill of the whole inditement , in euery point as it was taken from the beginning to the end , together with the prisoner , for that it did much concerne their Highnes seruice . Don Luys posted away ( as he was commanded ) with all the speed he could ; whilest poore Daraxa , her own father , and father-in-law melted into teares , considering the haste which the Iudges would make in dispatching this poore innocent Gentleman . Which they so much the more feared , for that their Petitions receiued so slowe an answere . They knew not what to say , or think of this so long a delaying of them , without giuing them any answer off or on , either good or bad , or any the least hope of life . This did exceedingly grieue them , but they knew not how to helpe themselues , nor had they left any one stone vn-remoued , but made all the meanes and friends they could . But that which did most daunt them , was , that the maine danger did consist in the delay .

Whilest they were thus strucken into their dumps , and doubts ( for what comfort can there be in so dangerous a suspension ? ) Don Luys ( as you heard before , ) spurred on a mayne , with much both speed and secresie . And as he entred the gates of Seuill , Ozmin was led forth of the prison , to be carried to his execution . The streets , and euery place through which they past , were full of people ; all was tumult & noise , and not a person , but wept and shed teares , to see so handsome a yong man , so well fauour'd , so valiant , and well-belou'd for those famous deeds which he had publikely done , to bee so vntimely cut off : And the more was their sorrow , to see him dye without confession . Which made them all to thinke , that he did it to escape death , or to prolong his life : but he was silent , and spake not a word , nor shew'd any signe of sadnesse in his lookes , but with a smiling kinde of countenance beheld them all as he passed along . They made now and then certaine stops , to see if they could exhort him to confesse himselfe , labouring all they could to perswade him , that hee would not lose body and Soule both at once . But hee answered them not a word , but held his peace all the while . The people continuing thus in this confusion , and the Citie wayting on this sad spectacle , Don Luys came , making the people giue way , pressing through the throng , to hinder the Execution . The (a) Alguazils thought it was a resistance of Iustice , and out of very feare which they had of Don Luys , for that he was a stout and valiant Gentleman , and dared to oppose himselfe to any danger , they forsooke Ozmin who was vnder their guard , and with a great hurry and clamour , they ranne to giue account of what had past , to the Magistrates , whose authority ( they thought ) it more neerly touched . Whereupon they came to know , what might be the cause of so great disrespect done vnto them . He put his hand in his pocket , and taking out the Kings Order , he deliuered it vnto them , which was by them , to their great contentments , most willingly obeyed . And so they brought Ozmin ( being accompanied with all the Gentlemen of that Citie , and the common ioy of the people ) to Don Luys his house ; Where that night hee was intertained with a gallant Maske , setting vp many Torches and Cressets in the streetes and windowes , for to giue the more generall content : And in token of their great ioy , they would haue celebrated those dayes hee stayed there with publike feasts ; for now they knew who he was . But Don Luys would not giue way thereunto ; but tying himselfe to his Instructions , carried him as his prisoner , along with him the next morning , being kindely vsed , and well intertained vpon the way , according to the greatnesse of his ranke and quality .

Being now arriued at Granada , hee kept him secretly with him some few dayes , vntill such time as he had order from their Maiesties to bring him to Court . Who when he was come before them , they ioyed much in the sight of him ; and whilest he was standing thus in their presence , they commanded Daraxa to be called forth . Now when these two Louers thus suddenly met in such a place as that was , so vnexpectedly , and so farre beyond their hopes , euery man may make his owne heart iudge of the wonderfull ioy which they receiued in this happy ( but vnlooked for ) incounter , and imagine with himselfe what each of them did thinke and conceiue thereof . When each others eyes had fed their fill , the Queene made towards them , and told them that both their fathers were become Christians : howbeit , Daraxa knew so much before . She desired them to doe the like , which shee should receiue as a singular fauour from them ; but that no other loue , nor feare should inforce them thereunto , saue onely that of God , and their owne saluation . But howsoeuer , whether they did so or no , ( for she would not compell the conscience ) her pleasure was that they should now instantly inioy their liberty , and dispose of their Estates and Persons , according to their owne will and pleasure .

Ozmin would faine haue answered the Queene with all the ioynts and sinnewes of his body , making them so many tongues , to render thankes to her Maiesty , for this so great a benefit ; signifying that he was very willing to be baptized ; and them addressing himselfe to Daraxa , in the presence of their Maiesties , he intreated her to doe the like . Daraxa , whose eye was neuer off from her dearest Ozmin ( so hungry was she in beholding him ) shedding a few sweet teares from her Rosie cheekes , directing her lookes & speech vnto their Maiesties , she told them , That since it was Gods will to inlighten their vnderstanding , and by many tribulations , to bring them to the knowledge of his truth , she was disposed , and that vnfeignedly , and with a true heart , humbly to submit her selfe thereunto , and to the obedience of their Maiesties , vnder whose protection and princely hands , she reposed both her selfe , and all that she had . So anon after , they were christened with a great deale of Ceremonie , naming the one Ferdinand , and the other Isabell ; according to that of their Maiesties , who as God-father , and God-mother gaue them their names at the Font. Within some few dayes after , their Nuptials were celebrated with a great deale of glory and ostentation , many Presents and other courtesies being conferred vpon them in that City , where they liued all their life-time , and left behinde them an illustrious and noble off-spring , which continueth yet to this day in much honour and reputation in their Country .

We went hearkening to this Story , with a great deale of Silence , being led on attentiuely with it , till we came within sight of Caçalla : so that it seemed to haue been measured iust out for that iourney , so truely did the one iumpe with the other . Howbeit , it was somewhat more inlarged by the Author , flourished ouer with finer phrases , and a different Soule , to that which I haue deliuered vnto you .

Our honest Carrier , who remained mute from the beginning to the ending ( which was no more then all of vs did ) began now to finde a tongue , and was the first that opened his mouth . Alight ( my masters ) quoth hee : For heere I must leaue you : my way lyes along by this path . And with that hee cals vnto me , Come hither , ( my yong Gallant ) let vs make vp our reckoning before we part .

When I heard this , I was almost ready to hang my selfe , it was the bitterest draught , that ere went downe my throat . Is it e'ne so , ( said I to my selfe ? ) Well , let it goe : for I did verily beleeue , that all that past betweene vs , had been in the way of friendship . Well , I dis-mounted , and got not vp so lightly before , as I now came downe heauily : for I knew not in the world what answer to make him , saue onely to aske him , how much I was to pay him for the riding of nine Leagues ? See what these Gentlemen giue , so must you . For your lodging and your dyet , you are to pay me three Royals more . The Vmbles of the Mule I now found to be deare meat vnto me ( and that they stucke a little also in his stomake : ) but that which grieu'd me most , was ; That I had not money to pay for it . And therefore I came vnto him , and told him ; My friend , ●…o , heere is your money for the reckning , so much you say is my part of the shot ; but for my horse-hyre I owe you nothing ; for you your selfe , without any intreatie of mine , desired me to get vp , inuiting me thereunto of your owne accord .

What a Diuell ( quoth he ) meane you by this ? Marry gupp with a murraine , you are a fine Gentleman indeed ; doe you thinke to ride a cock-horse on free cost ? you are a pretty Youth indeed . I replyde vpon him ; we fall to scuffling ; the Clergy-men inter - posed them-selues ; they were to vmpire the businesse betweene vs : They condemned me to pay for the meat of my Beast for that night . I did so ; making an euen reckoning with my purse , hauing no more left me in all the world , but twenty Marauedis , to beare my charges that night .

The Muletier went about his businesse ; The Clergy-men , and my selfe , entred into Cacalla , where we take our leaue , euery man betaking himselfe to his owne way .

THE ROGVE : OR , THE FIRST PART OF THE LIFE OF GVZMAN DE ALFARACHE . The second Booke . Wherein is treated , how he came to be a Rogue ; and by beeing so , what happened vnto him .

CHAPTER I.

How Guzman de Alfarache , going out of Caçalla towards Madrid , proues the quality and condition of a miserable man ; and vpon this occasion , grauely discourseth of the effects of Want , of Shame , and of Castles in the ayre : And how he came to serue an Host ; and of the wicked disposition of such kind of men .

THOV seest mee here in Caçalla , twelue Leagues from Seuill , vpon Munday in the morning , with my purse pennilesse , and my patience remedilesse : and accused ( as you haue heard ) for a Thiefe , by way as it were of Prophecie , presaging what I should bee hereafter . I suffered inough the first day I set forth ; the second , more . For my care increased , and it rained downe hard vpon him , who was too wet already ; one mischiefe ouer-taking another . I had lately money in my purse , and meate to put in my belly : and griefes ( as the Los duelos con pein , son menos . Prouerbe is ) are the better ouer-past with bread . It is good to haue a father , it is good to haue a mother ; but to haue meat to put in a mans mouth , is better then them both . The third day was to me , as it were , a day of death : for then I had my full load of miseries . I found my selfe then like a leane Dogge , barked at by others ; grinning with my teeth vpon all those that came round about me ; turning head against all , but not daring to bite any : my cares continued with me ; with them , their barking : and hauing hedg'd me in , set all vpon me at once : but that which most troubled mee , was ; That I had not where withall to spend , nor any meanes to defray my necessary expences . I knew then , what a a a Blanca , is a small price of ●…oney , Lat. As , assis . The effects of Want . Blanke meant ; and that he that doth not seeke to gather , doth not make any reckoning of it , nor know the woorth thereof , till he feeles the want of it . This was the first time , that I look't that Hereticke Necessity in the face : I knew him then by his Character , but afterwards I did better consider him by his effects . How many dishonest actions doth it venture on ? what cruell imaginations doth it represent vnto thee ? what infamous things doth it sollicite ? what disorders doth it driue thee into ? and what impossibilities doth it not attempt ? I weighed also with my selfe , with how little our mother Nature is contented ; and hauing giuen much to many , yet none of them rest contented : all cry out , They are poore , publishing their wants to the world . O thou Epicure ! O thou ryotous Glutton ! thou lauish Prodigall ! why dost thou talk thus foolishly , that thou eatest and swallowest downe so many thousand Ducats yeerely ? Say rather , that thou haft so much Rent comming in ; and that thou keep'st it in thy hands , but not that thou eat'st it out : and if thou doest eate it out , why doest thou keepe such a complaining ? seeing thou art no more man , then my selfe , whom poore Lentils , dry Fitches , old Beanes , hard Pease , and Bisket that is ●…enowed and moth ▪ eaten , keepes as fat and faire , as those that haue daintier feeding . Thou wilt not tell me , nor canst thou ( I thinke ) giue me a reason , what should bee the cause of it . For my part I know not : but if euer thou hast beene in want , or shouldst ( which is possible ) be put to shift for thy selfe , and be driuen to need and to lacke , thou wouldst then be able to tell mee another tale . I wish no man that ill lucke , but onely lament mine owne misfortunes . She is the Mistresse Necessity the best 〈◊〉 . to all things , a subtill I nuentresse , by whom your Thrushes , your Pyes , your Iack-dawes , and your Parrats are taught to speake . I plainely began to perceiue , how Aduersitie makes men wise : in that very instant , me thought , Adver●… makes men wise . I discouered a new light ; which as in a cleare Glasse , did represent vnto mee things past , things present , and things to come .

Till this present I was a meere Cockney , and well might that name sute with my breeding . For ( as it is in the Prouerbe ) Hijo de la viuda , bien consentido , y mal dotrinado : the sonne of a Widow is well fed , and ill taught . I had many chips to be hewne out of me , and the first stroke of the Axe , was this trouble that did light vpon me ; which did so wound the maine timber , and so touch me to the quicke , that I know not how to indeere it vnto thee . I saw my selfe abandoned , and so dangerously ingulphed , that I knew not where to find harbour , or to put into any port for to saue my selfe . My yeeres were few , my experience lesse , it being fitting , that they should both haue beene greater then they were . And which was worst of all , ( knowing by manifest signes , that my ruine was neere at hand ) being willing to aske counsell , I did not know from whom I might receiue it .

I entred into a reckoning with my selfe , and was making my Account ; A poore mans account , to what a reckoning 〈◊〉 comes . which I found to be very bad ; my charge was great , and my cash small : I was about not to haue gone any farther ; for to go on I wanted meanes , as I likewise did for to carry me home . I was ashamed , being I was come away from thence , to become againe ( as it is in the Prouerbe ) an Hindge to the doore ; ( which , howsoeuer that open or shut , it remaines still in the selfe same place ) or to put my foot vpon our owne Threshold , in the open sight of my Mother , my friends , and my kinsfolke . God helpe me , how many , from that day to this , haue I seene to be vtterly vndone , and meerely out of this respect ! I was ( I say ) ashamed : how many Virgin●… haue left off to be so , and haue lost their Maiden-heads , by thinking themselues to be tyde in thankfulnesse for a To be 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 modest e 〈◊〉〈◊〉 at is 〈◊〉 , 〈◊〉 cause of great hurt . paper of Sugar-Comfits , and some Loue-verses ; or because some vaine fellow hath giuen her musicke at her Window , and made her fall in loue with him , by the helpe of another mans quality ; with that very Song , which with a sweet ayre and gracefull voyce another sung for him ? How many block-heads ( out of shame of deniall ) haue entred into Sureti-ship for others , & haue payd the debt , themselues beeing vtterly vndone thereby ; and the children ( through the fathers folly ) for want of maintenance , sent to some Hospitall ? How much money hath bin lent and borrowed , for the continuing of friendship and kindnesse betwixt man and man ; whereby in the end it so falles out , that he doth not onely lose his friend , but his money too ? Nay more , many times it so comes to passe , that he that parted with his money , hath not meat to put in his mouth , and is ready to starue for want of food ; and hee that had it of him , hath ouer and aboue to pay him ; and yet the other dare●… not aske it him , and all ( forsooth ) for that he is ashamed to speake to him .

I would haue thee to know , ( if thou knowst it not already ) that Shamefastnesse Shamefastnesse , what it is likened to . is like vnto a web in a Weauers Loome ; if one thred be broken it rauels the whole Worke . In those things , whereby hurt may arise vnto thee , and driue thee to narrow shifts spoyle the worke , and breake the threds in sunder , and I assure my selfe thou wilt rather thanke me for it then thinke arnisse Good Aduice . of my counsell . And the inconuenience which thou must suffer , ( hauing done that which is desired at thy hands ) let him smart for it that craues it , rather than thou , when thou hast done it .

For Modesty and shamefastnesse in such a case , when it stands vpon a mans making or marring , is a thing that is onely proper vnto fooles . It is fit , that thou shouldst haue a kind of modestie in thy selfe , not to do ( no not when thou art alone by thy selfe ) any foule or shamefull act : but for any other , what knowst thou of what colour he is , or of what metall hee is made ? Free thy selfe from him , in that which shall neerely concerne thee ; let him not tye thee vp like a Dogge , with a chaine and a clogge , behind the doore of thy ignorance : cut , or slip the Collar ; get loose , and runne away from him , as fast as thy legges will carry thee . Onely be ashamed to do any thing ( as I sayd before ) that is shame-worthy . For that which thou callest Modestie , is no Modesty , when to be vsed . Shamefastnesse in some things , is notable ignorance . better then meere foolerie : if I my selfe had not beene ashamed , I should not haue wasted so many sheetes of Paper , as this volume containes , to acquaint thee with the sad Story of my miserable life : whereunto I might adde many more ; but I now ride poste , and must hasten away , promising to deliuer vnto thee farre greater things concerning my life , if God say Amen .

I tell you , it would haue grieued me very much to haue returned home without a Cloake , especially hauing come foorth with one vpon my backe . Not was I willing to be laught at , ( which they could not choose but doe ) to see what a single-sole Gentleman I was , and how like a naked cottage I lookt , or a bare wall without hangings : Besides , I made it a point of shame , and stood much vpon it . And that hauing put on a resolution at my departing , it had beene pusillanimity in me , and basenesse of mind , to haue had but so much as a bare thought of returning backe againe . I thought , I should neuer haue the like occasion againe , ( though I thinke , neuer any man but my selfe , played such an idle tricke ) and therefore when I was once on my way , it stood not ( me thought ) with my reputation to hang an arse , and to pull that foot backe , which had already set it selfe so forward : I made it a matter of shame , which turned afterward to my vndoing ; but am not now ashamed to speake this as boldly , as I did vnder-go it foolishly : for such another Asse as I , was there neuer .

The good old Hostesse ran still in my mind , who , I make account , will fall ere long into my hands ; whom , if it be my chance to light vpon , I beleeue she shall not get from me with her Kerchiefe on her head : I will make her walke with her haire about her eares , and throw her ( Sir-reuerence ) in the durt . I haue water inough in store for her , ●…o set her vp to the chinne : I am resolued to be reuenged on her , by treading on the very necke of her , and setting my foot on her old withered wind-pipe , throwing her first to the ground , as thou wouldst throw a Dish-clout .

Would to God ( thou paltry proud Boy , thou vnruly young man , and thou senselesse old Asse ) that I had either then vnderstood , or thou didst now know , what manner of thing Shame is , what point of honour and reputation , considering the great disorders that thou doest , and the idle courses that thou runnest .

I said with my selfe , my Reputation lyes vpon 't ; my Honour is ingaged ; I must and will goe on , my trust is in God , and I hope he will not faile mee . Hauing thus set vp my rest , I resolued to passe forward , with purpose to make a iourney to Madrid . For there was the Court , where was all the brauerie and gallantry of the world , nothing to bee seene , saue Roses and Lillies great plenty , and aboundance of all things , with many Knights of the order of the golden Fleece ; many Dukes and Grandes of Spaine ; many men of Title ; many Prelates ; many Knights of the Habit , with many principall Gentlemen of extraordinary ranke and quality ; and aboue all , a young King newly married .

I thought with my selfe , because I was a handsome young Lad , well shap't , and of some reasonable good fashion in my behauiour , that they would haue gone together by the eares for mee , striuing who should haue me away with him . O how many things did present themselues at once vnto mee ! How farre , in this simplicitie of ours , are our deeds , from our It is easie to think on a thing , but bard to bring it about . How both these are painted . thoughts ! What made dishes ; what hot , what cold ; what boyld , what rost ? For it is easier to thinke , then to doe . Businesses may bee soone conceiued , but they are not so easily effected . Both which in my imagination I thus paint forth vnto thee .

To thinke vpon a thing , I suppose to be like vnto a pretty little Boy , riding vpon a Hobby-horse , with a Winde-Mill made of paper , which hee beares in his hand vpon the top of a Cane , or some little sticke , that comes first to hand . But to bring that thing to passe , I liken that to an old man , bald-headed , weake-handed , lame-legged , who leaning on two Crutches , goes to the scaling of a high wall , that is strongly defended . Haue I spoke too much ? I say it is no lesse . For things oftentimes seeme to bee well disposed of in the night , when the Candles are out , and all is darke , taking Pillow Counsell proueth vaine . counsaile with our pillow : But the Sunne no sooner appeares , but they vanish away in an instant , like thinne clouds in the heat of Summer . He that could haue seene mee , when I made this account , might easily haue perceiued with what care , and breaking of my sleepes , I framed these things in my thoughts . But they were Castles in the ayre , and fantasticall Chimera's , and had scarce put on my cloathes when I had put them all off againe , and throwne them from mee . I plotted many things , but none of my proiects did hit right , but fell out crosse , if not quite contrarie to what I had proposed . All was vaine , all lyes , all illusion , all falsehood , and deception of the imagination , and like a a Duende , is one of the spirits that fell with Lucifer . Tesorode Duende : Or Duendes treasure , we say to be that Estate , or 〈◊〉 , which is all consumed and gone , and a man knowes not how , being vanished like a spirit . Duendes Treasure , all cold embers , and dead coales .

Now , I goe onward on my way , and hauing gotten me a short Cane in my hand , in stead of a walking Cudgell , me thought , all the while I had that , I had my b b A Plimmouth Cloake . Cloake on my back ; but it did neither doe me that credit , nor keepe mee so warme , as that would haue done . Onely it seru'd me to vnder-prop mine arme now and then , whilest I gaue breath to my weary legges .

As I was trudging along , a couple chanced to ouertake mee , trauelling that way on their Mules : I thought with my selfe , Could I now hold out lustily , and keepe company with them , they could not in kindnesse but pay my charges . But Pescar con c c Mazo is properly a Mallet wherewith Car●…ters dr●… 〈◊〉 Ch●… . Maço , no es renta c●…erta . To fish with a Pole , is no certaine rent . Nor , is it to thinke , and to be wise , all one . They To sute this with an English Prouerbe , I know not . are two differing things . They had neuer a boy betweene them , to goe along and looke to their Mules ; they did not ride very hard , though their hearts ( as I afterwards found ) wery very hard towards me . They rode gently inough , but they were cruell-minded men . Their pace was softer then their bowels , for any compassion that was in them .

I iogg'd still along , and kept close with them : and when wee had gone some three Leagues , or there-abouts , it was neere about Noone . My heart-strings were ready to breake with trotting and galloping after them , because I would not be cast behinde . For , though their gate were easie , yet it put me ( considering my youth and weakenesse of body ) to the height of my speed . These were men , or rather Beasts in mens shape , for they spake not a word . And I beleeue they were monstrous couetous ; and some there are that are so neere , that they will not part with their spittle , if they knew it would serue for a medicine . These miserable wretches would not exchange so much as one word with mee , because they would not helpe mee ( if need had been ) with some intertainment on the way .

Had they entred vpon some Discourse , or told mee some such Story , as did my honest Clergie man , I should not haue beene halfe so weary as I was . For good company , ( wheresoeuer we chance to light vpon it ) is a kinde of Good company , what effects it worketh . meat and drinke to the Soule : it cheeres the hearts of Trauellers ; it recreateth their minds ; it refresheth their bodies ; it makes them forget their wearinesse ; it riddeth the way ; it easeth our griefe ; it expelleth melancholly ; it lengthens mans life , and by a particular priuiledge that it hath , it makes horse-men , of footmen . Wee came in together into the Inne where wee were to bait ; but I in that case , that there was but little difference betwixt me , and one that is dead , I was e'ne quite out of heart , and cleane tyred out . But that I might get me a morsell of bread to put in my mouth , I was forced to buckle vp my selfe , to bestirre my stumps , to lay aside all ceremonies , and to forget to stand vpon my points . Moreouer I strain'd my selfe beyond my strength ; humbled my selfe more then stood with my nature ; applyde my selfe to wayt vpon them , to put their Mules into the Stable , and to carry their luggage into their lodging . They were sound and lusty , and had their healths about them , but I had got the Plague by meeting with them . For at the first dash , one of them sayes vnto me ; Stand aside ( my yong Gallant ) get you gone , we haue no need of your seruice .

O Traytors , enemies to God ( thought I to my selfe ) how vncharitably doe these men beginne with mee ? what hope can I haue from them , that they will giue me victuals ; or if I should faint on the way , that they would take pitie of me , and set me vp behinde them ? They are set downe to dinner : I stood right ouer against them , but somewhat aloofe off , thinking they would haue been so tender-hearted , as to affoord one bit or other from their trencher : but I fell short of my hopes .

There came thither at that time a Franciscan Fryer , who was on foot , and all in a sweat . He sate downe to rest himselfe , and anon after , puls mee out of his Wallet ( which hung on his left shoulder ) a Loase of Bread , and a piece of Bacon . I was so horrible hungry , that I could scarce stand vpon my legges , or fetch my breath , so faint was I growne for want of food .

But not hauing ( white-Liuer'd Whore-sonne , as I was ) the courage ( out of a dastardly kinde of bashfulnesse ) to speake vnto him to relieue my want : I lookt pittifully vpon him , and besought him with mine eyes ( which is a good dumbe eloquence ) that he would giue me a bit of something for Gods sake .

The good Fryer , who read my Petition in my lookes , ( with all the haste he could make , as if his life had lyen vpon the speedy doing of it , ) said ; Blessed The Franciscan Fryers Charitie . be God , Though I should want my selfe ; yet seeing thee in that necessitie thou now art , I would rather goe without my selfe , then to see my poore brother lacke .

Take this ( my pretty Boy ) quoth hee ; and much good may it doe thee . O to see the wonderfull goodnes of God , the eternall Wisedome , the diuine Prouidence ; the infinit Mercy , which in the bowels of a hard stone , doth sustaine a poore silly worme , and prouide it food , and filleth all things liuing with his heauenly bounty !

They that were able , and had wherewithall , would not ( out of meere couetousnesse ) giue mee so much as one crumme from their table : and what reliefe I could not draw from them , by all my seruiceable indeuours , I had from this Mendicant , this poore beggerly Fryer , onely for Gods sake , and out of meere charitie , seeing in what extremitie I was Quién proprias necessidades no tiene , mal se acuerda de agenas . Hee that neuer knew what want meant , hath little feeling of another mans misery . Mine was before them , they saw it , and with it my tender yeeres , and that I had almost broken my heart , hauing spent and tyred out my selfe to keep company with them ; yet were they not sensible of my wearinesse , tooke no pitie at all of me , nor did commiserate my wants .

My good honest Fryer , did freely share his victuals with me , wherewith I fill'd my belly , and was well satisfied . If that good man , as hee went towards Seuill , had beene to goe my way , hee had ransomed mee from my mis-fortunes , and had made me a happy man : but we were to runne a contrarie course , and to take seuerall wayes : yet when he was to goe his way , the good man ( I shall euer call him by that name , ) gaue mee halfe a Loafe that hee had left , and bid me farewell , telling mee , Thou must content thy selfe ( my child ) with this ; had I more , more shouldst thou haue .

I put it in the lyning of the lappet of my Iacket , and faire and softly set forward on my way . By that time I had gone three Leagues more , it was night , then did I supper my selfe vpon my bread , without any other meat in the world ; nor was there any that would giue me ought else to eate .

It was the Carriers day , and some of them Inned there : Mine Host of the house bid me goe in , and sleepe vpon the Straw , I did so , and past ouer my trauell , as well as I could , being poore and needy , and must doe as I might , seeing I could not doe as I would .

I had made a light Supper , ( which you may well beleeue without an oath ) for I did not rise the next morning with a full stomake . But when I was about to depart , and ready to leaue the Inne , my Host comes vnto A hard-●…rted Host. mee , and demaunds a Quarto of mee for my lodging . I had it not , and therefore could not pay it him : the cunning Rogue had a great desire to haue stript mee out of my Iacket , which was of very good cloath .

When I saw I was put to this streight , and that hee was so eager vpon mee , my eyes were brimme full , and ready to runne ouer with water . One of the Carriers tooke pitie of mee that was there , ( for they are not All Carriers are not K●…es ; some haue Soules to be saued . all Blasphemers , and fellowes that haue no Soules ) slept in betweene vs , and said , Mine Host , Let the poore Boy alone , I will pay it for him . His fellowes askt mee : Sirra , whence are you , and whether goe you ? Hee made answere for mee , that had paid for mee . What vnciuill people are ye to aske him that question ? Is that so hard a matter to be knowne ? you may easily guesse , that hee is runne away either from his Father , or his Master .

Mine Host then said vnto mee : How sayst thou my Boy , wilt thou take wages , and dwell with mee ? As things then stood with me , me thought it was no badde bargaine ; yet it seemed harsh vnto mee , that I should now learne to serue , who from my child-hood , had beene taught to command . I told him I would . Get you in then ( quoth hee ) and rest you heere , for I will not imploy you in any other seruice then the Stable , for the deliuering out my a a They haue little ●…ay in Spaine , and no Oates at al. Their ordinary feeding for Horse , is chopt Straw , and Barly . Strawe and my Barley , and see that you keepe a good account , and score vp truely , what euery man takes , that neither you , nor they may be mis-reckoned . Take you no care , Sir ( quoth I ) I shall doe it to a hayre .

And thus I remained there a while , hauing victuals without allowance , and feeding ( as they say ) vpon free cost ; and for my worke , that was rather a sport vnto mee then otherwise , and holpe well to passe away the time . For till those nights that the Carriers came , there was little or nothing to doe ; as for other ordinarie Passengers , it was not a trouble , worthy the talking of . There I learned to steepe Barley in warme water , to make it increase a third part , and to giue false measure ; I had the cunning strike of the hand ; I knew how to b b Hincar el pulpejo . hollow it with mine arme , and to runne ouer the Mangers ; and if any man did put me in trust to looke to his Beast , and to giue him his Prouender , I would bee sure to coozen him of one third part of his measure . Some of my Yongsters would come in now and then very neatly , in their tricksie c c Manc●…billetes de ligas y vigotes . Garters , and their trim Mouchato's , as spruce as could be , carrying the show of Gentlemen , but the Diuell a Page or Lackey that they had to attend vpon them . It was good holding the Bason to these : they are your onely Dons , to indure a fine Shauing .

With these , wee droue a good Trade . For wee came vnto them , and taking charge of their Hackneys , we did set them vp in such places as were appointed for them , where they had the remaines of that the others had left , which went for one halfe of their allowance ; and the other halfe they were presently supplide with ( though but bad measure ; ) but when they came to pay , we gaue them a reckoning for the whole . And into the bargaine we had our Hens , and our Pigs , if not now and then the Foale of an Asse , that did helpe to share with them . For bountifull natures , and minds that are magnificent , neuer sticke for trifles , nor offer to stand for small matters ; Magnanimus non curat de minimis . so that we had all that we could aske , and they neuer made any more bones of the matter . Our mouthes were the measures , neuer weighing the set prices of things , nor the Sizes set downe in the Proclamation , nor what the Iustices had ordered in that kinde , which were formally hung vp in euery Inne , with a particular taxe to euery thing there specified . For those are neuer kept , and therefore made little or no reckoning thereof at all . Onely they are set vp there at our doores , to the end that the Alcalde and the d d The Notary . Esçriuano may licke their fingers , and receiue some monethly profit from the fees belonging thereunto . And to take occasion to see , whether they had fixed vp the Cedula or no , with purpose to picke a quarrell with them , if they neglected the doing thereof , and so make them pay soundly for it . For the Stable , it is already well knowne , what euery Horses allowance is , and how much it comes to a piece , both for their Straw , their Prouender and their Standing . For the Kitchen , that was sport alone to vs , it made vs all merry , for we were quicke vpon that call to come in , and nimble ( as hauing learned our lessons afore-hand ) in the bringing in of our reckoning . So many * * A Marauedi , is the thirty two part of a Ryall , which is sixe pence . Ryals ( Gentlemen ) and so many * Marauedis miche yee God diche you , and you are heartily welcome . Being euer sure to reckon rathere a Ryall ouer , then a Blanke vnder .

Many ( like good wise men as they were ) would neuer examine the reckoning , but lay downe their money presently , saying , Lo ( my friend ) ther 's your due . But some fresh-water-Souldiers , that were but Nouices and yong Trauellers , plants of the first Leafe , would aske vs wherefore ? How can it come to be much , & c ? But this was but to cut their owne throates , and to make vs to inhaunce the reckoning the higher ; for when they once put vs to that iumpe , ( besides the raysing of our prices in the generall ) we did alwaies finde a tricke to adde some-thing , though it were but for the boyling of their a a Olla , is a pot or P●…k 〈◊〉 wherein ●…sh , & other things are sed ▪ by the Figure Metonym . The Olla is taken for that which is boyled in it . Olla podrida , is a very great one , contayning in it diuers things , as Mutton , Beefe , Hens , 〈◊〉 , Sawsages , Piggs feete , Garlick , Onions , &c. It is called Podrida , because it is sod leisurely , til it be rotten ( as we say ) & ready to fall in peices . And it is therfore ●…earmed Podrida , for that it is like fruite that is ouer-ripe . Andreas Bacius , A Roman Phisician , in his booke de natura Vinorum , says ; That Olla Podrida , is the same as Poderosa : To wit , powerfull by reason of its greatnesse , and the variety of the things contayned in it . In English it may well beare the name of Hodge-podge . Couarruuias , verb. Olla . This Olla , is in Spaine the common'st meate of all other , and in most esteeme . They eate the meate first , and suppe vp their Caldo or broth afterwards . Olla , and such like toyes ; so that by this time there were many wanting for to make vp the full reckoning , which they were forced to pay in the end , by way of fine or amercement for their folly . For had they ( like others ) taken their payment quietly , they had not beene so soundly lash't . For you must vnderstand , that the word of an Host , is a kind of definitiue Sentence ; there is no appealing from it , but to the Purse . Nor is it swaggering or roaring that can serue the turne ; your brauings will little benefit you ; for your Hostes , for the most part , are a company of old Catch-poles , dogged Curres , who out of a scuruie condition that they haue , will with a still mouth hunt dry-foot after you , till he come to some good Towne , and then hee will bawle vpon you ( like olde Cryer ) and when he hath set you vp , will accuse you to the Iustice , That you would haue set his Inne on fire , or that you did bastonado him with a Cudgel , or that you would haue forced his wife , or his daughter ; and onely that hee might do thee a mischiefe , and be reuenged vpon thee . Besides , we had some Lures in our house to catch foolish birds with-all , and had some shewes of prouision for poore Trauellers ; which were such , that no man that had come into the Inne afoot , would haue stayed to goe out a horse-backe : if thou chance to forget thy selfe , and to leaue any thing behind thee , giue it thy good word , vnlesse thou haue the better lucke ; for it shall be layd vp sure inough for thy finding .

What shall I tell thee of the thefts , the tyrannies , the impudencies , and the villanies , that daily passe in your Innes and Victualling-houses ? There is neither the feare of God , nor of his Ministers amongst them : and for matter of Iustice , either there is none at all to be had against them , or else they take part with them : But God forbid , that we should beleeue any such things of them ; for it is not to be supposed , that your Iustices will be corrupted : But be it so or not so , take it as you will , the remedy thereof were a matter of no small importance . For it is a thing worthy the following , that many Wain-men , and those that goe vp and downe with Carriages , do refraine their Trading , through the great expence and charges of your Innes . Trafficke ceasseth euery where , out of the feare that they haue to be bitten by your Hosts , and Victuallers , who receiue good payment for euill vsage , professing a kind of publicke theft .

I haue beene an eye-witnesse of seeing many things touching these kind of insolencies ; which to deliuer , would require a large Discourse . And should we heare the like amongst Barbarians , we should censure them accordingly ; and yet , when we see the same here at home before our eyes , we are not moued thereat . But I sweare vnto you , that b b Profitable conueniences for Trauellours . the mending of the high wayes , the repayring of Bridges , and the reforming of Innes , is not that which requires lesse care , then matters of greater moment , in regard of commerce and trafficke . Howsoeuer , when I shall leaue this house , I haue not farre to go .

CHAPTER II.

How Guzman de Alfarache leauing his Host , went begging to Madrid ; and comming thither , how he set himselfe to learne to play the Rogue , and to beare a Basket ; where by the way he discourseth of Hunger , of Beggerie ; and of Honour which hurteth the soule .

THIS beeing too lazie a life for me , I did not like it halfe well ; and the lesse , for that it did not sort to my purpose . For I was no better ( to speake the best of it ) then an Inne-keepers Boy , which is some-what worse then a blind-man . I had a mind to be a Traueller , and thereon had set vp my resolution , and therefore would not ( though it had cost mee a thousand liues ) haue beene found there in such a base Office , as that was . There did daily passe by the doore many haggard-Hawkes , young wandring Lads , much about my yeeres and growth ; some with money in their purse , others begging an almes for Gods sake : whereupon I said with my selfe , What a deuill ayles me ? or what scuruy metall am I made of , that I should be more cowardly , and baser-minded then other men ? in that I am not sensible , how much I wrong my selfe ; and out of a faint-heartednesse , and like a Crauen ( as I am ) should stoope to picke out a poore liuing , out of such a dung-hill kind of life , as this ? Hereupon I tooke heart vnto me , and set a good face on the Cuzman resolues to part with his Hoste . matter ; and so bidding mine Host God b'wy , I went foorth to seeke my fortune , carrying some Copper-money along with me , gotten in a good warre ; and some other lawfull purchases that I made : but my store being small , it was quickly gone . When all was spent , I fell a begging : some would giue Guzman falls a begging . me an a a Ochauo , is a kind of brasse-money , whereof two make three farthings . Ochauo ; but most would say vnto me , Pardon me ( my Boy ) I haue not for you .

With this poore Ochauo , and other his fellowes , I did eate now and then with a gaudeamus , according to my gettings : but this Pardon mee ( my Boy ) I haue not for you , did me no good in the world : I might haue sate downe with a pereamus , for any comfort that I found in it . Charity was very cold , and it was no maruell ; for it was a deare yeere , and there was a generall scarcitie thorow-out the Kingdome . And if there were a dearth in Andalusia , how great then must the want be in the Kingdome of Toledo ? and farre greater in the In-land . Then I heard that Prouerbe verified , Librete Dios de la enformedad que baxa de Castilla , y de hambre , que sube del Andaluzia , b b When there is a Plague in Castile , the insetion is geuerall . And when there is a a famine in Andaluzia , the dearth is ouer all the Land . Guzman leaues begging . What shift he makes to liue . Guzman comes to Madrid ; and in what kind of fashion . God deliuer thee from the Plague , that comes downe from Castile , and from the Famine that comes vp from Andaluzia .

Now , because I found begging to be but a poore Trade , and all things else at excessiue rates ; food and rayment being deare commodities , I grew so out of heart therewith , that I resolued to follow that occupation no longer , though my wants should be neuer so great . Hereupon , I was minded to make the best I could of those Cloathes that I had on my backe : then I began to vnbinde the Booke , and to diuide it into Leaues : that is , to separate one thing from another , that all might not go away at once ; sorting my clothes into seuerall parcels , consuming one piece after another , till all was gone ; selling this , chopping that , and pawning t'other , till I had not a ragge left .

So that when I came to Madrid , I look't like one that had newly come from the Oare , or some gentile Rower returned lately from the Gallies , I was so lightly clad , hauing nothing on but a Canuas paire of Breeches , and a course Shirt ; & that none of the cleanest , but as foule as foule might be ; all to tatter'd and torne , and so rotten with age , that it was ready to fall from my backe . And this I was forced to do , to keepe life and soule together , and all little inough to serue the turne .

Seeing my selfe thus out of reparations , and all to be rent and torne ; howbeit I sought after Seruice , thinking to winne credit with my good words , no man would trust me the more for my faire tongue , but grew rather ielous of my euill conditions ; insomuch that I could not meet with any that would giue me intertainment , admit me into his seruice , or suffer me to come within his doores , because I was without a Cloake , and so nasty in my other cloathes ; that out of a very loathing , they were able to turne a mans stomacke . They did thinke , that I was some roguish little Thiefe , and that if they should take me in , I would filch some thing from them , and betake mee to my heeles when I had done .

Seeing my selfe in this desperate state , counting my selfe , as it were a lost man , I began to follow the Trade de la Florida Picardia , exercising all your Cony-catching trickes , knauish prankes , fine feates , with slight of hand , and whatsoeuer Rogueries come within the compasse of that prowling office . The shame that I had to returne home , I lost it vpon the way ; for trauelling afoot as I did , it wayed so heauie , that I was not able to bring it along with me : or perhaps , they that stole my Cloake , carried it away with them in the Cape thereof ; and this is sure the likelier of the two . For euer since that time I haue beene troubled with a lazie kind of yawning , and a * Feuer-lordane , ᵃ The Spanish word is Calofrio : Lat. Paroxysmus , frigus si●…ul & calorem inducens : & nomen habet à calido & frigido . Hunger and Shame , mortall enemies . Guzman begins to ●…rne Ticaro . which did prognosticate the Disease I should be sicke of to my dying day . A Pockes vpon Shamefastnesse , which hung still vpon me , and yet I had none of it ; for I began to free my selfe from that irkesomenesse , and that little shame that was left me , I turned into ●…mpudencie : for Hunger and Shame could neuer yet be made friends . My former Modestie ( I confesse ) was meerely out of my shallownesse of wit , and now I find , that it was euen then a foolish kind of Simplicitie . And in those dayes , I playd the child , as others of my age do : but now , like a Vyper , that hath stung mee vnawares by the hand , I haue shak't that Vermine from off my fingers ends . I fell in with other Tasselgentles , much about my size and pitch , that were high Flyers , and cunning in the catching of their prey . As I saw them do , so did I , as well as I could : but because I was but newly entred , and was not yet come to that true flying to seize the Partridge in foot , I did assist them with my best indeuours , refused no paines , followed their steps , and walked their stations ; whereby I came to picke vp my crummes , and to gather a few Blankes together . Thus I sayled vp and downe , fetching my boords to and fro , still sounding as I went along , to see how many fadome I was off from the shore , and what new Countrey was vpon discouery .

I could now hunt out for my supper , as well as the best of them , and knew certainly where to haue it ; but I was to take heed , that I playd the true Clock-keeper : for if I failed of my hower , ( especially at your Monasteries , and Religious Houses ) and did not truely keepe the due time , limited and prescribed by them , I was shut out , and left in the darke : so that I had now learned the fashion , to shew my selfe a mannerly Ghest , by staying rather for Need is a diligent ●…ayter . others , th●…n that others should stay for me . This loytering kind of life was not without its cares ; and as idle as it seem'd to be , it was painfull inough vnto mee : for , while I led this Roguish life , I learned to play at Cock-All , at Handy-Pandy , and at Nine-holes ▪ from these I went a Forme higher ; I knew how to play at Noddy , One-and-thirty , Quinolas , and Primera : in a short time I profited so well in these my studies , that I past on to the vpper Forme . I could cogge a Dye handsomely , and if I had good lucke , all was mine owne ( especially if I met with weake Gamesters . ) Nor would I change this life of a Picaro , this roguish life of mine , for the best that any of my Ancestors euer ledde .

I had a moneths mind to the Court ; and I went daily refining my wit ; I set a new edge vpon my vnderstanding , and inriched my braine with new Philosophie . And seeing others of lesser worth then my selfe to grow from a little , to a great deale of wealth ; and from meane beginnings , to come to mighty matters , and to eate their bread without begging , nor expecting it from others hands , ( which is the bread of sorrow , and the bread of blood ) yea though it should be bestowed vpon thee by thine owne father : out of a desire Bread of Sorrow , what 〈◊〉 is . that I had to attaine to this glorious liberty ; and that I might not ( as many others ) be punished as a Vagabond , and runne the censure of a wandring Rogue , I applyed my selfe to carry such burdens , as my weake shoulders were able to beare .

The Fraternity of Asses is a great Brother-hood ; for , euen men haue beene willing to bee admitted into this Companie ; and haue beene glad to yeeld themselues to carry vncleane and heauie Loades , with as much patience , as the silliest Asse aliue , as if they had beene borne for no other end , but to ease them of their burthens . Now , if men are growne to that basen●…sse , that they will quite the Asse of his Hamper , and clap it on their owne backes , onely to gaine an a a Açumbre is a Ia●… or Pitcher , containing about a Pottle , little more or lesse , and is one mans all●…wance in wine . The Açumbre we di●… into foure Measures , called Quartillo's . It is an Arabicke word . All things are hard in the beginning . Açumbre more of Wine , that they may drinke the freelier , when they haue done their worke : see in what ample manner their Assishnesse extendeth it selfe ; what a strong hand it hath in the world , and to what a mighty Corporation it is now growne .

But to let this passe , I confesse vnto thee , that I was some-what cold in the matter at the first , and fell to it with an ill will ; but aboue all , I was wonderfull fearefull : for being a thing that I was neuer vs'd to before , it suted ill-fauouredly with me at the first , and worse afterwards , when I was entred into it : for all beginnings haue their difficulties ; and are not so easie at the first as they seeme to be : but after I had taken a rellish of this Roguish life , and found the sweetnesse of it , I could tread the true Tracke of it , and was growne so perfect , that I could haue gone blind-fold to my worke , and not haue stept a foot out of the way .

What a fine kind of life was it , what a dainty and delicate thing without Thimble , Thred , or Needle ; without Pinsers , Hammer , or Wimble , or any other Mechanicall Instrument whatsoeuer , more then one onely bare Basket ; like vnto those of your Brethren of the Order de Anton Martin , ( though vnlike to them in their goodnesse of life , and solitary retirednesse ) I had gotten me an Office whereby to liue : and such a kind of Office , as seemed to be a bit without a bone ; a backe , without a burthen ; a merry kind of Occupation , and free from all manner of trouble and vexation ?

I did often thinke on the life that my Parents led ; and that , which I had made tryall of in this so short a time ; as also , that which they had vndergone to so little purpose , and to their so great cost . O ▪ ( said I to my selfe ) what a burthen is the weight of Honour ? And what metall is there , that can equall Honour , what a burthen it is . it in poyze ? To what a world of inconueniences , is that man lyable , who is driuen to make vse of it ? How warily , and how circumspectly must he goe to worke ? What a deale of care , and sudden passions , come vpon him ? What high and slender ropes must he runne vp and downe vpon ? Thorow how many thousands of perils must he sayle in this vaste Ocean ? Into what infinit troubles must hee thrust himselfe ? And amidst how many Brambles , and Bushes , and pricking ▪ Thornes , must he im-bryer , and intangle himselfe withall , and scarce get out of them , without leauing his ●…ece behinde him , if not his skinne ? What a thing is it , that my honour must bee subiect to the mouth of the dissolute , and to the hand of the indiscr●…t and vnaduised man ? The one by word , the other by action . Against which , all the wit and force of man is not able to preuaile , nor to turne that vnruly tyde , when it shall breake in vpon vs . What phrensie of Sa●…n , what malice of the Diuell was it , to marry this foule Abuse vnto Man , which is able to make him run mad , and irrecouerably to lose his wits ? As if he did not know , that Honour True Honour , is the Daughter of Truth . is the Daughter of Truth . And see how much a man is Vertuous , so much is he Honorable , and no more . And it is impossible , that my honour should be taken away from mee , as long as my Vertue remaines with mee , which is it's proper Centre . Onely mine owne Wife may take away mine honour from me ( according to the opinion of Spaine ) by taking away first her The honour of a mans Wife , what it is . owne : for she being one and the selfe-same thing with my selfe , my Honour and hers are one , and not two , as being but one , and the same flesh ; and whatsoeuer shall be said in the contrarie , it is but scurrility , meere wit and inuention , and the idle dreames of a fantasticke braine . Happy is that mans life , that neither knowes what Honour meanes , nor seekes after it , nor hath any thing to doe with this Titulary top .

I was euer of the minde , that if that man that pretends Honour , should but truely open his eyes , & looke vpon it without partialitie , considering ( not carried away with passion ) the effects thereof , he would not stoope to take it vp ; nor touch that with his hand , whose burthen must either breake his backe , or make him sinke vnder the weight thereof to the ground . O how troublesome a thing is it , first to get it ? how difficult afterwards to keepe it ? how dangerous to hold , how easie to lose , as depending on the common estimation and opinion of men ? But if it rely vpon the Vulgar , and that bee the What the honour of the Vulgar is . proppe that must vp-hold it , it is one of the greatest torments that Fortune can giue , or man suffer in this life , who desires to end his dayes quietly , and to passe his Carreere peaceably , without being crossed in his Course . And albeit men plainely perceiue , that this which I say is true , and they see the experience thereof daily before their eyes , yet they will not sticke to hazard their liues ; nay to giue their very Soules for it , as if that should saue them another day .

Thou thinkst it no honour vnto thee , to cloath the naked , to feed the hungry , nor to exercise ( as thou oughtest ) those good deeds , that belong to thy Christian Honour , what it ought to be . function , and many other things , which I know , and am silent in ; and thou knowest them to thy selfe , though thou doest dissemble them ; thinking that others perceiue it not , and that thou carryest things closely , when as indeed thou dancest but as it were in a net , and all thy actions lye open to publique view , which my pen shall omit to set down , that I may not point them forth vnto thee as it were with the finger , and whereof perhaps , when I shall haue deliuered thee my minde , thou wilt make no more , if not lesse reckoning of it , then of a blast of winde , or a puffe of smoake , that presently vanisheth , and is no more seene .

Canst thou thinke it an Honour vnto thee , that the Hospitall should bee maintained with the droppings of thy Tap , and the Scraps of thy Kitchen , ( when there is not a Dogge , that waites at thy Trencher , but fares better ? ) Canst thou thinke it an honour vnto thee , that thy Mules should haue their Linnen and their Woollen cloathes , whilest Christ ( in his members ) dyes out of very cold , not hauing wherewith to couer his nakednesse ? Canst thou thinke it an Honour to thee , that thy Horses should be as fat as their skins can hold , that they are euen ready to burst againe with the fulnesse of their feeding , while the poore fall downe at thy gate for want of food , their weake legges not being able to support their hunger st●…ued bodies ? No , thou canst not . And I presume , the practice of euery good Christian is farre otherwise . And this is that honour , which euery man ought highly to esteeme , and may iustly seeke , and hunt after it . But that which thou callest honour , may more properly be termed Pride , or foolish estimation , which makes men fall into Hecticks , and P●…ysicks , and with a canine appetite to catch greedily at that Honour , which is no sooner had , then lost . And not onely that , but with it the Soule ; ( which is a thousand pities ) which euery good Soule ought to auoid , and bewaile .

CHAP. III.

Guzman de Alfarache goes on in his Discourse against vaine Honours : Wher●… ▪ by the way he offers vnto Mans consideration , what manner of person hee ought to be ▪ how to beare himselfe in his Office , and to gouerne himselfe in those high places , wherevnto he is called .

ALBEIT , ( as being then but a Youth ) and newly ( as they say ) Honour , how prettily it is heere compared . crept out of the shell , this being the first flight that euer I made , I had runne thorow many miseries , and suffered much want , yet I past them all ouer as easily as I could ; imagining still in my minde , that Honour is like vnto your early fruits , that are sooner ripe then the rest , and brought first into the Market , which though they be excessiue deare , & not to be had , but at a high rate , and vnmeasurable prices ; yet all doe equally buy them , and pay alike for them , euen from him , that hath a purse to beare it , as from him , that hath not the like abilitie . What a great presumption and shame is it , that a poore Husband-man should buy halfe a pound of your first Cherries that come into the market , which may chance to cost him the price of so much bread , as would very well serue to sustaine himselfe , his Wife , and his Children ? O holy Lawes , and O happy Kingdomes , that shall put a bridle to this abuse , as a thing tending to the generall hurt of a Common-wealth ! For ( there being no restraint in that kinde ) they buy , and eate thereof without limit , or moderation , neuer growing weary of buying , nor glutted with eating : Which too timely , or rather vntimely fruits , breed no good nutriment , corrupt the bloud , cause raw concoction , and ingender euill humours , which afterwards pay their bodies with sound Agues , sharpe Feuers , strange Parasismes , and other the like grieuous , and painefull infirmities .

I sweare by the faith of an honest man , that such a deuouring of Honour , will cost thee more then one purge . I was neuer ambitious in this kinde , neuer greedy of this honour , neuer gaue it a good looke , since I first knew it ; especially , when I saw Pages , Seruing-men , and Prentises forsake their old Trades , to follow new courses , and to get themselues into some odde Office , Honour ill placed vpon so●…e . or other , as farre repugnant from their nature , as heat , from cold , and as much differing from their disposition , as heauen is distant from the earth . Yesterday , thou wouldst haue sent thy Seruant to one of these fellowes , to will him to come to thee , and when he had come , giuen him an Ha , or a Nod , or a plaine a a Counted a disgracefull word in Spaine . As if heere in England we should in scorne Thou a man . Vos , which was as much , if not more , then he deserued . And now that he hath got but an Office vpon his backe , hee sends the next day for thee by a Porter , where thou must sue and intreat that hee will be-friend thee in such a businesse , and stand with cap in hand , crowching vnto him , giuing him the Worship , with a Sir-reuerence at euery word , beseeching him , that his Worship would be pleased to doe you this or that fauour .

Tell me , is not that true of this man , which is spoken of that proud Bird the Peacocke , who t' other day hauing scarce euer a feather to couer his nakednesse , doth now boast his silken plumes , and spread abroad his golden traine ? If this be true , it must likewise then follow , that when this painted puffe shall haue his tayle pluckt , all his gilded feathers , and rich imbroyderies taken from him , which natures richest hand hath so curiously wrought ; if any mis-fortune befall such a man , and that he once come to be stript of his honours , downe goes his goodly traine , and his plumes beeing pull'd from him , is iust the same man , as he was before .

And if you shall but weigh and consider this thing well , you shall find such Touching Honour , and the honoured . men as these , not to be men of Honour , but men honoured ; for they that are truely honourable , haue this honour from , and in themselues , and no man can so pill and pull their feathers , but that fresher and goodlier plumes will come vp a-new in the place , and be more glorious to looke to then before .

But the honoured , that receiue their honour from another , one while you see them ; another while you not see them . So long as the merry moneth of May lasteth , so long are your flowers fresh and faire to see to : As these flowers , so are those fauours , which the Fauourite receiueth from the Prince , or person that fauours him . They soone fade ; they had but their time , and that s gone , and they with it : And then they returne to be the same men they were before .

Whilest the sap is in the bough , it is greene and flourisheth ; but when it goes backe into the roote , it dyes and withereth for the time . So it stands with your Fauourite ; his Honour flourisheth like the greene Bay-tree , while his Princes fauour shines vpon him ; but when hee cals this in againe vnto himselfe , as the tree doth the sappe , and it returnes to the roote from whence it came , his honour is nipt in the head , and is no better ( if not much worse ) then he was before his rising . So haue I seene some men mounted on high , imployed in great affaires , and to haue held great places of Dignity and honour in the Common-wealth , which might haue beene put into the A reprehending of those that are So●…s and Do●…s , and yet seeke a●…ter Offices , and Places of great preferment . hands of Gentlemen of approued good iudgement , and excellent parts , and thought themselues happy , if they had beene conferred and bestow'd vpon them .

To these men I haue call'd as I haue lyen in my bed , and cryde out vnto them : How now ( my friends ) whither away goe ye with these Offices ? Who ( if they heare me ) might very well answere : I vow to God , I know not my selfe : I thinke they are therefore giuen vs , that wee should make our profit of them , feather our nests , and in-rich our selues , as well as we can . But thou doest not consider ( wretched as thou art ) that the burthen which thou bearest , thou neither truely vnderstandest , nor is it properly belonging to thy profession : and that in losing thine owne Soule , thou ouerthrowest withall another mans businesse , and art bound in conscience to make him recompence , for the wrong thou hast done him .

Doest thou not know , that there belongs more to the dispatch of businesse , and deciding of differences betwixt party and party , then there doth to the sowing of a Garment , or the shearing of Cloth , or tolend such a Gentlewoman your arme , when you Vsher her along the streetes ; which grace shee vouchsafes to affoord thee , for that hands sake , which did aduance thee ?

Peraduenture , thou maist haue beene askt the question , or thy selfe mayst perhaps haue made some secret scrutiny in thine owne bosome , whether thou didst finde thy selfe of ability and sufficiency to performe thy charge ; or whether thou hadst the knowledge and vnderstanding to doe things well and handsomely , without wronging thy Conscience , going thy selfe to hell , and carrying him along with thee , that did conferre thy Office vpon thee ? But some babbling fellow here-abouts , which I suppose to be some one Barbers man or other , ( for they are commonly a kind of Climactericall and dangerous prattlers ) will giue me this short answere : Wee can . It is a strange thing to see the humours of some men . Consider with mee ( for Gods sake ) what businesse hath with it so many tricks , so many shifts , and so many difficulties , as hath this ? We are all of vs men ( the best of vs are no more ) and when the wheeles are once set a-worke , wee imagine , they must goe well inough of themselues , without any care , or looking to of ours . O what a pitie is it , that thou shouldst then begin to learne an Office , when thou should'st come to vse it ! O what a griefe , to see a mans practice out-runne his knowledge ! he being as vnfit for the Place , as the place for him .

The Pylot is fearful of gouerning his Ship , ( not only in tempestuous weather , but at all times , euen in the calmest Sea , and fairest Season ; by reason of those sudden accidents , and various casualties , which hourely , nay , euery minute may befall him ) although he be his Arts-master , and throughly vnderstands , what he hath to doe vpon all occasions . And thou , which neuer sawest the Sea , wast neuer taught thy Compasse , nor knowst what belongs to the Art of Nauigation : Wilt thou , I say , venture to steere a Ship , and ingulph thy selfe , thou knowst not whither , no●… into what danger ? What wouldst thou thinke or say , when thou seest a Boy fumble on the Citterne , and when hee should come to play before thee , not to be able to strike a true note ; what a tearing would this bee to thine , or any other musicall eare ? O how harsh would it sound ? And yet all this while , thou doest not , or wilt not perceiue , that when thy selfe commest to vnderstand thy Place , or to thinke , that thou vnderstandest it ( which is the truer of the two ) for want of knowledge , thou hast not onely lost that , but thy Lords loue together with it , and the time which thou hast spent , and nothing left to comfort thee withall , but the fooleries , which thou hast committed therein . Follow thine owne trade , and exercise thy selfe in those things , thou well vnderstandest , thrust not thy Sickle into another mans Haruest , and meddle not with those things , that are fitter for others , then thy selfe . But this is not so much thy fault , as of those that thrust it vpon thee , who haue more , then thou , to answere for it : it is a Commutation , that lyes heauily vpon the Conscience . But to proceed .

Euen now , but to day , haue I knowne these kinde of men , meane , poore , and miserable creatures ; on the morrow after , they haue risen vp in a strange fashion , vtterly vnknowne vnto me ( like him that dyes his Beard , or being old and strooken in yeeres , growes to be young againe , ) exalted , and set aloft , looking bigge vpon the matter , expecting to haue the first Cap , and to bee first saluted by those , whose seruants they might well haue been , and that in meane and base offices , and yet haue thought it preferment good inough for them . I knew very well , which way he would goe , that led the daunce ; & whence this violence did proceed , by altring things , and putting them out of their due course , thrusting out the naturals , to bring in strangers . I likewise was not ignorant , that those that did murmure and repine thereat , had good reason so to doe ; for by giuing vnto euery one , that which of right belongeth vnto him , the gall of Enuy and Malice is thereby broken and split in sunder . For it is an case to the sicke stomake of a State , when Offices seeke men , and not men Offices , whence great scandall and infamie doth arise . For by how much the more high Places make them to be knowne , that doe not deserue them , by so much the more they mak●… the owners of them to be contemned and despised . And these vndeserued dignities ▪ go not away without their payment . For as they are an affront to those that hold them , when they are vnworthy of them ; so they suffer dishonour in themselues , by beeing conferred on such vndeseruing persons ; Leauing him likewise , who did bestow them , subiect to In●…amy , Detraction , and Obligation to make satisfaction to the State , for the wrongs occasioned thereby .

Heere I alight , and make a stand , shutting vp my conceit within it's bounds , that it may not straggle too farrre . This ware I sell you as mine owne , and recommend it vnto you for good , vnlesse you vnder-value it for the sellers sake . And I must needs confesse , that this off-spring of my braine is worthy a better father . But doe thou dispose of it , and compose it , according as thy selfe shall thinke fit , by amending such faults as thou findst amisse . And though it be a beggers Brat , and the sonne of a Rogue , yet conceiue withall , that we are all men , and haue all of vs vnderstanding ; and that El habito no Cucullus non facit Monachum . haze el Monge : it is not the Coule , that makes the Fryer . Yet in this , as in all things else , I submit my selfe to thy censure , and am willing to receiue thy correction .

Now by this time , thou knowest my weaknesse , notwithstanding I would haue thee to know , that there was not that day went ouer my head , wherein I did not runne ouer my beades , besides other deuotions that I did . And although I heare thee murmure , that it is a common practice amongst Thieues and Ruffians , to haue their a a Rosario . Las cu●…ntas para rezar . Latine , Sphaerulae , Precatoriae , Corona . Rosario still in their hand , faining themselues to be very deuoutly affected towards our Lady : Thinke , and say what thou wilt , I care not a rush , for I desire not thy good opinion , nor seeke to winne any credit from thy mouth . Euery morning , the first thing that I did , was to goe to Church to heare Masse ; that being done , I afterwards began presently to cast about , how I should spend that day , for the getting of something to sustaine my selfe withall , and to keepe me from staruing .

I once remember , that hauing layen some-what long a-bed , and finding my selfe not halfe currant , I thought it not fit , that day , to take any paines for my liuing : it was a Festiuall-day , and to Church I went , where I heard high Masse , and a very good Sermon by a learned Augustine , vpon the fifth A Discourse vpon the S. o●… Mat. Chapter of S. Mathewes Gospel , where it is sayd ; Let your light so shine before men , that they may see your good workes , and glorifie your Father which is in Heau'n : where by the way , he bestowed a little sprinkling vpon your Clergie-men , your Prelates , and such as were beneficed : telling them , That they Clergie-men charitably reprooued of their faults . had not these great Rents giuen them for nothing ; that they were to looke rather vpon the greatnesse of their charge , then into the greatnesse of their Reuenew ; and that these good things were not confer'd vpon them , to fill the belly , and to cloath the backe , and to waste and consume these good blessings of God in vnnecessary idlements ; but in feeding the poore , and cloathing the naked , and in dispensing to the needy , and those that are in necessitie ; ouer whom God had set them as Stewards , and no otherwise ; or to speake more properly , hath appointed them his Administrators ouer this his Hospitall . And that in putting this Steward-ship or Administration into their hands , it was more particularly throwne vpon them , then any other , as on men of all other the most to be trusted , and ( by reason of their Profession ) least interessed in the World : mercifull-minded men , wholly retired from the world , and from those confusions which accompany it ; to the end , that with the more care , and the lesse trouble , they may apply themselues to this Ministerie , wherewith they were in-trusted .

Would to God they would open their eyes , and looke to whom they giue , how , and on what they do distribute it ; for it is anothers money , and not their owne , whereof a strict account will be taken of them . Let them not therefore abuse the trust , that is reposed in them ; God neuer sleepeth ; he is still awake and se●…th all our Actions . Nor will it boot them to vse trickes and deuices to defraud him but in a Farthing , or to coozen him of the least Mite . For as it is the gaine of Iudas , so shall they receiue Iudas his reward . He sayd in the generall , that their manners and behauiour should bee like vnto the Lantern●… in the Admirall , to the rest of the Fleet , by whose light , all the rest What manner of ●…en Church-m●…n ●…ght to be . of the Ships should steare their Course , and still haue an eye vpon it , without troubling themselues in other worldly affaires , and matters of profit to their purse , which is contrary to their Profession , and to that obligation , whereunto they are bound by Gods Word , which cannot lie .

I remember ver●… well , 〈◊〉 then call to mind a certaine friend of my fathers , how ill he disposed 〈◊〉 which he had got , and the ill example which he left behind him : this was his end ; and with this the Preacher ended .

Many other excellent good things did he vtter to this purpose , and strongly confirmed what he deliuered with forcible reasons ; which for the in-decencie of my profession , I willingly silence ; nor is it fitting for a man of my fashion , to make mention of them .

That night my sicknesse increased vpon me ; my bed was none of the best , nor much softer then a piece of an old Matt , that is full of holes , and throwne Guzmans miserable condition . vpon the dung-hill , as good for nothing . The cattell went grazing on the humane Pasture of my miserable corps ; I awaked with their nibbling ▪ fell a scrubbing , and finding no disposition in my selfe to sleepe , I made a repetition of the whole Sermon to my selfe ; as one , that vnderstood very well , that Euery man , euen the meanest , is bound to be vertuous , and to haue a good conscience . albeit his speach tended more particularly towards Church-men , yet it did in the generall appertaine vnto all ; from the Myter to the Crowne ; from the most powerfull Prince , to such a poore Caytiffe as my selfe . Lord be mercifull vnto me , I began to thinke with my selfe , that this did as well concerne me as them : and that I was a kind of Some-thing ; that I had a soule to saue as well as they ; and that there was some reckoning to be made of me too . Then I began to examine my selfe , What light am I able to giue to others ; or how can it be had , much lesse , shine in a man , whose office is so vile , and so base as mine ? Yes ( my friend ) quoth I : and it belongeth also vnto thee , and therefore I speake it vnto thee ; for thou likewise art a member of this mysticall Body , equall with the greatest in substance , though not in quality . Beare thy burthens well and faithfully ; make not your Vintage out of other mens Grapes ; doe not nimme and purloyne by the way ; conueying from the Basket to the Breeches , into pri●…y Pockets , and false Linings , that which is none of thine . Doe not shrinke the shoulder , as if thou hadst the dead weight of Plate vpon thy backe ; and do not thou moue as slowly , when thou hast but two Loaues to carry , as when thou art laden with two Beames , or maine pieces of Timber .

Make a conscience of thy gettings ; bee moderate and temperate in thy What your Porters that carry baskets , and the like burdens , ought to do . gaines ; not demanding more then thy labour is woorth ; vse all men well , but bestow thy paines on the poore for nothing ; offering that freely , as thy first fruits due vnto God . Be not dishonest , be not vicious , be no Glutton , nor no Drunkard : call thy conscience to an account , be sure to keepe a true score and reckoning with it : for , in so doing ( like that poore olde woman in the Gospell ) thou canst not want the comfort of lifting vp thy heart , and thy eyes vnto Heau'n , saying ; Blessed be the Name of the Lord . For euen in Rogues there is some vertue , some sparke of goodnesse ; and this in thee shall bee thy Light .

But in my iudgement , both now , and then when I heard the Sermon , ( that we may returne againe to our former consideration ) what he spake ( besides that which concerned the Clergy and the Communalty ) had especiall reference vnto Princes , and their ministers of Iustice , whereof I should haue spoken when I made this my Digression . These are truly sayd to be the Light ; and in that sacred Chapter-house , or in the greatest part thereof , all is Light , Light , how it ought to be in those that be are Office . more and more Light still , to the end ( to leaue them the more inexcusable ) that they may not alledge hereafter , that they had not any Light at all . Consider with me , that the Light ought to subsist ( as the Agent ) in some subiect ( as the Patient ) whereon to worke . As for example , in the Waxe , be it Torch , or any other thing whatsoeuer . I say then , that when any such kind of person , be it another , or be it thy selfe , shall represent himselfe , as a Light vnto me , thy good workes , thy faire behauiour , thy ciuill carriage , thy zeale , thy Rules for him that gouernes others . holinesse of life , is that which makes thee to shine , and to giue Light vnto others . What thing is it then , thinkst thou , to haue an Office throwne vpon thee , or some great dignity or other ? It is a putting of Waxe to this Light , to make it shine the more : but tell me then , what is the office of the Light ? It is to go with his heate , drawing and sucking the Waxe still towards him , that it may burne the brighter , and maintaine it selfe the better . Euen so must thou do with thy Office ; thou must drinke it in , as it were , and incorporate it into this Light of thy vertues , and honest course of life , that all men may see it , and imitate it , bearing thy selfe so vprightly , that prayers may not moue thee , teares may not soften thee , gifts may not corrupt thee , menaces may not daunt thee , anger may not ouer-come thee , hatred may not disturbe thee , nor affection deceiue thee . Againe , which offers it selfe first to our sight , the Light , or the Waxe ? You will grant me , the Light : if so , then so behaue thy selfe , that thy Office , which is the Waxe , may be seene after thee ; and Offi●…rs compared to the 〈◊〉 , and to Waxe . that the Office may be knowne by thee , and not thou by the Office . It often so fals out , that the Waxe is much , and the Light is little ; whereby the Light comes to be drowned and quenched in it ; as in case the Torch should be great , and the Weke small . Other-times it happeneth , that the Light is turned Bad Officers , and their euill effect●… . down-wards ; and so by melting the Waxe aboue , it is presently extinguished and put out .

So we see , that the good in thy selfe is so little , and the Office which thou art put into , is so farre beyond the measure of thy Merit , that that little Light thou hast , is smoothered on the sudden , and so thou remainest in darknesse . Other-whiles , thou turnest these thy vertues towards the ground , by inclining thy selfe vnto euill : for thou dost make thy Office to melt as it were at the top , and to waste and consume its light , by thy robbing , by thy coozening , by thy ouer-commanding , and contemning the poore : vsing in his Cause , delayes ; in that of the rich , all possible speed : with the poore thou deal'st rigorously ; with the rich , gently and mildly : on the one thou frownest , on the other thou smilest : the poore thou proudly tramplest vnder thy feet ; but the rich thou salutest with Cap in hand ; bowest thy body , vsing him in all the rest , with a great deale of loue and kindnesse . And while this is in doing , Death comes on thee vnawares ; it seizeth suddenly vpon thee , thy life is quickly at an end , but thy damnation remaineth for euer . Others there are , who ( as I sayd before ) draw Light from their Office ; and whereas they themselues ought to be the Light , they are indeed but the Waxe . Wouldst thou know the condition of these men , and what they do ? I will tell thee : What , I pray , is the property of Waxe ? To goe by little and little , wearing and wasting away ; haling the Light violently after it selfe , till they both go toppling out , vanish away at last , and come to nothing . Iust so is it with these kind of men ; they liue in that manner , ( hiding their Light vnder a Bushell , concealing their good Workes , and burying all Vertue and Goodnes in them ) that they make no vse of it , nor esteeme it : onely they esteeme the Office , which they haue made their Light : this , they go forcing , as it were , by violence , they tugge and hale it vnto them , that they may incorporate it into themselues , that they may reape their profit by it , skimme the Creame from it ; and not onely that , but to draw away its very heart-blood . And so by little and little , together with it , they themselues likewise consume away . Ill they liu'd , and ill they dye : as was their life , so was their end . What doth he thinke with himselfe , that suffers himselfe to be made Waxe , when he taketh from one that which is his right , or that which he iustly deserueth , and doth transferre it on a foole , or some vn-worthy person , whom he hath a desire to pleasure ? Shall I tell thee what becomes of this man in the end ? He melts and drips away like Waxe , not knowing how , nor which way he comes to bee consumed : his health decayes , his honour diminisheth , his wealth wastes away , his friends faile him , his wife , his children , and his kinsfolke , are taken from him by Death ; on whom , as on the proppes of his house , leaned all his God ●…sheth 〈◊〉〈◊〉 , and 〈◊〉 what manner . pretensions , he is swallowed vp with Melancholy , as it were in a graue , or some deepe pit , yet knowes not the cause why , nor whence it should proceed . But the cause ( my friend ) is , that these are the whips of God , wherewith he scourgeth them temporally in this world , in that part which shall paine them most , besides that which he reserueth for their farther punishment , in the world to come . And his diuine Maiesty , for the comfort of the righteous , is willing , that those , that doe dissolutely sinne , by doing publike and open wrongs , contrary to all right and reason , should be corrected in the sight of men , and in the open view of all the world , to the intent that they may magnifie him in his iustice , and draw consolation vnto themselues from his mercy , which is also made knowne in the chastisement of the wicked .

Wouldst thou liue in health ? wouldst thou bee cheerefull and merry ? wouldst thou continue free from those disturbances , which might giue thee cause to lament ? wouldst thou abound in riches ? and leade a contented life without melancholly ? Take then this rule of me ; Make thy dayly account A good lesson for those that desire , to liue well and happily . with God , confesse thy selfe vnto him euery day , as if that very day thou wert to dye .

Let Iustice be obserued by thee in that maner , as it is defined and set down vnto thee , giuing to euery man that which is his due : Eat of the sweat of thine owne browes , and not of the labours of other men ; and to this end , store thou vp such riches , as are well and truely gotten ; so shalt thou liue contentedly , so shalt thou be happy , and euery thing shall prosper and thriue with thee , and all shall goe well with thee and thine .

In good sooth I am halfe afrayd , that this consideration of mine hath ledde mee on a little too farre , where-into I haue so farre thrust in my foot , that I had need of some helpe to pull it out . I haue launched out too much into the deepe , and ingulphed my selfe before I was aware . I haue almost lost my selfe in this businesse , in dilating vpon this point , and should runne out much more at randome , if I should goe about to tell you , why , and how , some of these things , are thus and thus carried , whether out of priuate interest , or affection , or passion , &c. But I will bee silent , all shall bee hush with me ; for I will not ( in these tongue-controlling dayes ) that the Law take hold vpon mee . Secreta mea mihi : My secret I will keepe to my selfe ; I will locke it vp close in mine owne bosome : besides , good and discreet silence is counted a holy thing : Though in that which I haue spoken , I acknowledge my excesse , and confesse I haue ( with the Cobler ) gone beyond my Last , this being a point of doctrine , fitter to bee discussed by a Why Preachers refuse to reproue sinne , and to cry out against it ? Preacher , then a Picaro . These barkings will require better mouth'd Dogges . Let them stretch out their throats , and yawle alowd , that they may discouer the theeues . But alas , it may happely , or rather vnhappely bee , that they haue their mouthes stopt with a crust , which makes them to hold their peace .

CHAP. IV.

Guzman de Alfarache deliuereth a learned and witty Discourse , conceyued by himselfe , against the Uanity of Honour : touching by the way vpon the Vices of Seruants , of Shop-keepers , of Notaries , of Proctors , of Iudges , of Artificers , of Apothecaries , of Physicians , and of Lawyers .

I Haue made a long and a tedious digression , and am well witting thereof to my selfe . But I would not haue thee make it a matter of wonder ; for the necessitie that enforced me therevnto , was very great . And if two or more hurts meet in one and the selfe-same body , it is good discretion to succour the more important , not being vnmindfull in the meane while of the lesser . So doth it often occurre in Warre , and in all other things whatsoeuer . I assure thee by the faith of an honest man , that I am not able to tell thee , which of the two were the greater , either that which I did let alone , or that which I tooke in hand , considering how much both of them imported , and of what consequence they were . But let vs redeeme the Pawne that stands ingaged , and returne againe to our former matter , following the pursuite of that Discourse , of whose footing , we haue found the pricks already .

It was my hap one day to beare in my basket , ( which I brought from the Shambles ) a quarter of Mutton , for a certaine Hosier , or Gentleman Taylor . I had by chance at that time about me , certaine old a a Coplas , son cartas que venden por las call●… , y en las plaças los cicgos . Coplas , or Ballads , which ( in a kind of broken tune ) still as I read this or t'other line , I fell a singing , as I went along . My good Master hauing ( as it should seeme ) listened vnto me , look't backe on the sudden , and smiling , said ; How now ( my totter'd Raskall ) a pox take you for a ragga-muffin , can you reade , you Rogue ? Yes marry can I , Sir , ( quoth I ) I thanke God , I can reade reasonable well , but my writing is better then my reading . Sayst thou me so , Boy ? And with that he intreated me , that I would teach him to write his name , or to make some marke , that might serue for a subscription , or vnder-signing ( hee cared not A Taylor would faine learne to write his name , o●… to make his firma or marke . And the reason why ? which ) for either would serue his turne . I pray Sir ( said I ) what good can this doe you ? What can you benefit your selfe , by hauing learned to make a bare marke , and no more ? Me thinkes you should haue no great vse for that alone , vnlesse you could write too . Yes marry haue I , Sir ( quoth he , ) for I haue much worke goes through these hands , of such and such great men , I make all the cloathes their children weare ( and there by the way , he reckons me vp a bead-roll of these and these Lords ) and therefore I would very faine , ( if I knew how ) learne to write my Name , or to make my Marke , that ( if occasion were offered ) I might not be taken for an Asse , and say ( like a foole as I am ) when I am call'd to subscribe , Indeed , Sir , you must pardon mee , I cannot write . And so this businesse broke off as abruptly , as it began . And I making a large Soliloquium , and meditation to my selfe , went on a good while with the same after this manner .

Heere ( Guzman ) thou shalt see , what a kinde of thing Honour is , seeing it Honour , what kinde of thing it is ? is conferred on such as these : It is , the sonne of Nothing ; the Child that knowes neither father , nor mother ; the Earth's off-spring , beeing raised out of the dust thereof ; it is a fraile Vessell , full of cracks , of flawes , and of holes , vncapable of containing any thing in it , that is of any moment or worth ▪ Fauour hath indeuoured to mend this broken Bucket , and to stop the Leakes thereof with clouts and with rags ; and putting therevnto the rope of priuate interest , now they draw vp water with it , and it seemeth to bee very beneficiall H●… , compared to base persons . and profitable vnto them . It is one of Peter the Taylors sonnes , whose father , howsoeuer he got it , were it well , or were it ill , made a shift to leaue him something to liue vpon . Or like vnto that other , who by stealing from others , got wherewithall to giue , and where-with to bribe , and suborne . These are the men that are honoured now adaies , they speake high language , and vtter arrogant words , and presse into all your great Assemblies , and principall meetings , as if they were the only men , and none but they . These now take the vpper hand , sit downe first , and take place of all men , whom heretofore you might haue ranked amongst your Muletters , or scarce so good men as they .

Behold , how many good men haue with-drawne themselues from the Court , and liue a priuate and retyred life at home ? How many habits of St. Iago , Calatraua , & Alcantara , sowne with white threed ? How many of the ancient Nobilitie of Zayn Caluo , and Nunno Rasura , trodden vnder feet ? The more rich , the more honour .

Tell me I pray , who is that that giues honour vnto some , and takes it from other some ? Marry , it is more or lesse wealth . O what a braue Canon is this , to qualifie a man ? what an excellent Rector , what a learned Schoolemaster ? How discreetly doe they graduate a man , what a good examination doe they take , before they preferre any ! Tell me once more I pray : What difference is there in their Obligation , between him that commeth fairely ( as thou saidst before ) by an Office ; and him that buyes an Office , whose money only ( without any other merit ) hath inthroned him in the Sancta Sanctorum of the world ? Whence comes it to passe , that the man that is discreet , noble , vertuous , well descended , of a sound and sober iudgement , long practice , & more experience , a true Master of his Art , should ( by being depriued of his due preferment , ) remaine poore and needy , shut vp in a corner , excluded from businesse , afflicted , and peraduenture inforced to derogate from his owne worth , and to doe that which is not agreeable to his disposition , that he may auoid the incurring of a worse inconheuience ? Thou hast put too hard a taske vpon me , considering that slender satisfaction , that I am able to giue thee : But I shall tell thee , according to my talent , and as the poorenesse of my vnderstanding shall giue me leaue .

When I consider thereon , as a thing properly appertaining vnto God Gods secrets concealed from man . ( whose iudgements are inscrutable , and hidden both from men and Angels ) I shall not inter-meddle , or straine my selfe any further therin , then the shortnes of my apprehension shall be able to reach vnto . Which is ; That he very well knoweth , how to proportion his gifts , and to giue vnto euery one so much as is needfull for him , for his saluation . And therefore when a man shall faile of such or such an Office , or misse such or such a preferment , God saw it was not so fitting for him , for causes best knowne vnto himselfe , or for that hee fore-knew that it would be a meanes to worke his condemnation , whom he is willing to saue , because he hath predestinated him to a better place .

And this is as much as can be said concerning him , who doth not obtaine that , which he deserueth . But for that Fauorite , or person of Power with his Prince , that shall either be a blocke in this mans way , or strippe him of the Office that he worthily holdeth , who is not a Iudge of the inward intentions , nor of the hearts of men , neither is able to examine them ; but must goe vpon trust , and make his iudgement by externall and outward things , ( which he can only see and know ) doth often-times tread awry , and peruert and wrest things to an ill sense : If it may be lawfull for vs to speake in a rusticall phrase ; applying the language of heauen , to that here on earth , I say , that vpon the margent of this great mans Account , God doth ( as we vse here to doe , when we will marke a thing the better , and looke more narrowly into it ) shut one of his eies , to make his sight the surer , when he mindes to hit the marke hee aimes at . I say then : I wil demand of these men , what cause they had to do this wrong , knowing that my threatnings are out against them ? O ye Iudges of the earth , because ye haue iudged vnrighteously , I haue prepared for you a hard and insufferable punishment : I will reside in the Synagogue of the gods , and I will iudge them . O , what a griefe is it , how many thousands of pitties , that these men ( knowing this to be true ) will aduenture to come before that vpright and true Iudge , when the Accusation is certaine , which is brought in to condemne them ; and the restitution now wanting , which they ought to make ; without the which , their sinne cannot be forgiuen them ; and yet would not , when time serued , take order to make amendment for so foule a fault ▪

True it is , that peraduenture there were not some wanting , that would whisper them in the eare , and say ; Sir , you may doe this very well , and not sinne , it is not a thing that ought to trouble your conscience , you did well , ( which is no more then euery wise man would doe , were he in your place ) in bestowing this Office , on that kinsman , that acquaintance , that friend , or seruant of yours , which are neerest vnto you . But ( to speake the truth ) thou couldst not doe it ; for thou didst remoue it from it's right place , and put it into that , which was vnfit , and improper for it . Looke ouer thy Cardes a little better , thinke well on this businesse , and then thou wilt tell me ( my friend ) that it was an errour in thee , and that thou couldst not doe it ; And because thou couldst not do●… it , thou didst sinne ; And because thou didst sinne , it was not well done . Doe not listen to the words of fooles , nor of flatterers , in a thing that concernes thee so much as this doth : it were better for thee that thou wouldst gird vp thy loynes , and looke vnto that which may doe thee hurt , and seeke in time to preuent it , lest the remedie come too late . For there are some Confessors , that will giue large Absolutions , who are like vnto Taylours , who will tell thee , that the garment which they haue made for thee , fits thee very well ; but thou knowest better then they , whether it wring thee or no , whether it be too streight , and vneasie for thee , and how it sitteth to thy body . And God doth permit , because thou didst not seeke after one ( whilest thou wast liuing , and in place of authoritie ) that should tell thee the truth ; at the time of thy death , when thou art in thy last agonie and anguish of soule , thou shalt not meet with that true friend , that shall then tell it thee , but rather sooth thee vp to thy condemnation . Looke about with thine eies , open wide thine eares , and suffer not these busie Bees of Satan , to put honie into them , nor there to swarme and in-hiue themselues . For these their sweet words will but leade thee on in the high and ready way to damnation .

But to returne againe vnto these kinde of men , in respect of God , I doubt not of their punishment ; And in regard of man , I must plainely tell thee , that they open the doore to murmuration , and giue occasion to the people , to speake thereof in publike , not sticking to vtter ( as I said before ) those ends which I thought should haue beene kept secret : taking pittie and compassion of so many merits , so ill rewarded ; and of so dis-proportionable an Exchange as this , in seeing the euill , by euill meanes , to be in highest esteeme : and the good , by reason of their goodnesse , to be excluded , and shut out of all . But I can assure you , that God hath numbred all the haires of their head , and will not suffer one of them to fall to the ground . Though men therefore may chance to faile them , yet let them comfort themselues with this , that they haue a good God to friend , that will neuer forsake them . This is the World , and thus things goe .

I therefore will neither haue Empire , nor Dignitie ; I will not haue Honour , I will not so much as once looke vpon it . Keepe thy selfe as thou art , ( Guzman : ) continue ( my honest friend ) the same man still . Let others ( a Gods name ) be the Councell of the Common-wealth , the Oracles of the State ; let them neuer thinke vpon thee ; Enter not into that place , whence thou canst not get out , when thou wouldst : Doe not put thy selfe into that danger , which may bring a continuall feare with it ; Desire not to haue too much , lest it chance to be taken from thee ; nor too little , lest thou bee driuen to beg ; Doe not pretend any thing by way of flatterie : Doe not intangle thy selfe in many businesses , lest they should disquiet thee : Seeke to be the Vsufructuarie , and free inioyer of thy life , that by vsing of it well , thou maist liue safe in thy estate . Why shouldst thou keepe a stirre , and trouble thy selfe for that , which to morrow is to be no more , and when it is at the most , is of no iong continuance ? What doest thou , or any man else know , is become of the Mayor-Domo to King Don Pelayo , or of the Chamberlain to Conde Fernan Gonçales ? They had honour , and they held it , but neither of them , nor that , is any memory remaining . So shalt thou the next day be forgotten , as if thou hadst neuer beene at all . Why then is there so much greedinesse , so much thirst , and so much coile ; one for his belly , ( for to so great a Vanitie are w●… now growne , that to eate and waste much , is held no small reputation ) another for his backe , and a third for honour ?

No , no , these things are not for thee , and if thou offer to trouble thy thoughts with them , thou shalt not liue to be an old man , or else thou shalt be old before thy time . Leaue , leaue off , I say , the swelling pride of these huge Gyants , and thrust them vp against the Walls ; let them stand there , as Bug-beares to fright children , as being good for nothing else .

Cloath thy selfe in the winter , with that which may keepe thee Warme ; and in the Summer , with that which may couer thee , not going too slouenly , nor too pompously ▪ rather decently then richly ; Eate no more then may suffice nature , preferring moderation before excesse , for whatsoeuer is more then necessary , is meerely superfluous . For by it , neither the rich man liues , nor the poore man dies . But the diuersitie and abundance of meates , is rather a disease then otherwise , breeding viscous and slimy humours , whence arise grieuous sicknesses , and mortall Apoplexies .

Twice , thrice , nay foure times happy art thou , who risest in the morning Libertie , how pleasant a thing it is . when thou wilt , and at what houre thy selfe listeth , without once thinking of seruing , or being serued by any body ; for although it be a trouble to haue a Master , it is also a trouble to haue a seruant , as you shall here by and by . At noone , feed freely , dinesecurely , runne not vpon the score with thy Cooke , nor be indebted to thy a a A Cater , that makes prouision for victuals . Dispensero , send not for thy Coales from the Merchants Sellar , where they gather b b In Spai●… they sell their coales by the pound . wet and moisture , in stead where of they will bring thee in dust and stones , wherewith thou wilt be coozened ; for there are more deceits in the world , then thou or any man else knowes , saue God alone . Seeke not to excell in brauerie , affect not too much neatnes ; feare not euery spot that may fall vpon thy clothes , be not in loue with rich Imbroderies ; be not too carefull to keepe , nor too fearefull to lose . Bee not enuious nor suspicious ; Let no occasion moue thee to lie ; Doe not purchase preferment by vndermining of others , nor worke not another mans Ruine , to worke thy selfe into fauour . Thinke it fitter for thee to goe alone , then accompanied ; a quicke , then a slow pace : rather laughing then weeping ; eating then dancing ; without being noted by any . That is the best Tauerne to thee , where thou meetst with the best Wine : And that the best Cookes shop , where thou lightest on the best morsell : In the Market place , thou maist make choice of the best seat , and so thou maist the like at all publike Feasts . In the Winter , get thee into the Sunne , in the Summer into the shade . Thou maist couer thy Boord according to thine owne minde : thou maist make thy Bed , according to thine owne liking ; without paying one pennie either for the making or standing of it : And maist choose , whether any man shall see thee , disquiet thee , or contradict thee . Keepe thy selfe aloofe from Law-businesses : liue a stranger to Sutes & Actions : free thy selfe from false Witnesses , for feare they should part thy goods amongst them , and become masters of all that thou hast . Let no man be able to aske thee a penny ; keepe thy selfe safe from Decrees ; Beware how , and whom you trust , and vpon what termes : but aboue all , ( which will be no small glory vnto thee ) take heed , how thou becom'st a surety for any man . Giue no cause to haue any executions come out against thee ; nor thou to doe the like against others : Shunne all contentions and debates , and all manner of suites in Law . Last of all , rest thou satisfied and contented , so that nothing may oppresse thee , nor breake thy sleepe , that thou maist rise betimes in the morning to thinke vpon those things that may turne to thy good , by reforming what is amisse .

All men can not doe all that they would ; yet our good God is not forgetfull of the poore , hauing opened a way vnto him , whereby he may liue contented ; The poore man may , 〈◊〉 himselfe well , liue happely . not giuing him more cold , then his body is able to beare , suting his constitution , according to his cloathes ; so that he may passe in this world , as well as the rich , if he will but order and gouerne himselfe aright . But this life is not made alike for all men : And vndoubtedly , the first inuenter must be a most famous Philosopher ; for so happy a reposednesse , is to bee supposed to haue it's beginning from some singular wit . And to speake truely , that which is not so , costeth much trouble . And those that doe not so passe through this life , are the men that suffer , and pay for all :

Walking through this world with many disturbances , contentions , and molestations ; flattering , idolatrizing , carrying things away with a strong hand , plotting of tricks , violently haling by the haire , that , which neither ought to be suffered , nor is fit to be effected , or any way in the world to bee borne withall ; shutting their eyes all this while against that , which it concernes them to see ; but are very sharpe-sighted in looking to their profit , nothing shall passe by them then : They are Linxes , and Eagle-ey'd , when their prey is before them , though it were better for them in these things , to bee as blind as the Beetle , or the Mole : For then they begin to lay their Nets , to pitch their Hayes , fall a setting of Lime-twigges , watching how to put themselues forward , by making of Pit-fals , wherein to to intrap men , thinking to raise themselues , by the fall of others . For they doubt not of their owne comming forward , if they can but once come to thrust others backe . Vanity of Vanities , and nothing but Vanity .

O what a grieuous thing is it , that a man should suffer such a number of calamities , and for no other end onely , but to vphold his frayle and vnfortunate What a troublesome thing Hon●… i●… ? honour from falling ? And he that thinkes he hath surest possession of it , liues but with so much the greater care to repayre and maintaine it . I returned againe and againe to consider thereon , neuer ceasing , nor neuer inough satisfied with the repeating of this saying : Happy , thrice happy thou , who hast wrapt Honour in a Coffin of Lead , and with strong cords , tying heauy stones therevnto , hast buried it in the Sea , whence it may neuer rise vp any more , nor appeare vnto the world .

I likewise beganne to thinke with my selfe , what a hurtfull thing in a Family , Bad seruants , what a ba●… they are to a house . is a villanous , an vngratefull , a coozening , and a lying seruant : whereof now a-dayes , the world is too full . And if we shall briefely decipher forth vnto you such a manner of seruant , you shall finde him to be a Foole ; a Slouen ; a carelesse Companion ; idle , lazie ; a bagge , fill'd with nothing but malice , and roguery ; a Funnell , to powre in all manner of discord , and dissention ; full of prattle , vpon euery slight occasion ; and dumbe , in those things , that are of any moment ; ignorant , in speaking ; and impudent , in grumbling .

Shall I character forth vnto you a Maid-seruant , or a Nurse , that will serue The wickednesse of 〈◊〉 , and their 〈◊〉 . for any thing ? You shall haue her sluttish , theeuish ; with a Brother , a Parent , or a Kinsman , euer and anon asking for her , troubling thy house with dayly visits ; for , and with whom , she returnes so many nights , euery weeke , by retayle ; diuiding that time amongst them in parcels , which shee should lay out in the grosse in thy seruice ; deuoted onely to the loue and seruice of her Sweet-heart : earnestly desiring to see her selfe made Mistresse of a Mantle : shee will looke for good maintenance , and be her wages neuer so good , that proportion will not serue the turne , but as she sees occasion , she will still bee grating more and more vpon thee : And you must ouer and besides , allow her her wine into the bargaine , because forsooth her stomake is weake , and cannot digest her meat without it . If wee will but looke out into the street , which way so euer we turne our eye , we see euery thing want some-what in the finenesse of it's Loy and true touch , all is false , and without law , nothing that is perfect , neither in weight , nor in measure .

And that this is true , looke into your Shambles , your Hucksters , and other Falsehood in selling of wares . shops of retayle in the Market-place ; and then you will tell mee what a deale of coozenage they vse in the venting of their wares , and with what gainefull cunning they vtter their commodities . Besides , to what desperation doth a false , or corrupted Notary driue a man vnto ? Against whom , euen truth it Against Notaries , Scriueners , &c. selfe hath not the power to preuaile . For the Stemme onely of his Quill , and the very nib of his Pen , is more dangerous against whom it is bent , then a strong-steeled Launce , or a Canon of Brasse , with all his batteries .

What thinke you of alying Attourney ? a wrangling Lawyer ? Both men of an euill conscience , full of tricks and of quillets , skilfull in deceiuing , cunning Against Attourneys & Lawiers . in plotting , and aboue all , wonderfull louers of delayes , making it their maine study to put off and prolong suites , that they may licke their own fingers , and fill their hungry bellies , at other mens cost .

What say you , to an obstinate and head-strong Iudge ? one of those ignorant Against Iudges . wilfull ones , who will not sticke perhaps to say of himselfe ; I vnderstand my selfe well inough ; I know what I speake ; nor will I bee taught what to doe . When indeed , he neither vnderstandeth , nor knoweth , nor doth any thing that is fit , nor is well vnderstood by others . At the first , hee seemed milde and gentle ( before hee was warme in his Office ) like a Bull amidst a Heard of Cowes ; but when he came forth , he appeared fierce , and full of rage , as if he had been stucke with darts , and his bloud drawne from him . He wore a garment , which for the shaping of it into fashion , setting the pieces handsomely together , and to make it fit for wearing , had need of more then a thousand Scedules , and as many Passe-ports , as also the thread of Theseus ; for it is a Labyrinth to enter into . O with what hunger is he affected ! he thinkes hee shall neuer be full inough . So that I must say , nothing escaped his hand , were it little or great ; the bare fell , or the whole Fleece . I found he offended in all : In this by an I ; in that , by a No : In some things ; by doing , in some things by not doing : Offending , not only in matters of Omission , but in sinnes of Commission . Who , like the Lyonesse , can with lowd roarings put life into these little Whelpes , ( these dead truthes ) to the end , that by taking breath , some remedy might be had ?

Let vs runne through all occupations ; Looke I pray into your Taylor , with whom it is now growne to a custome , that you must pay something to the Against Taylors setting vp of their a a The Spanish word is Pendon . And so it may signifie somthing giue●… to the Corporation . Against , Masons , Smithes , Carpen●… , &c. Signe , else your worke shall ne're be made an end of ; or if it be , it shall be spoyled in the making , or they will filch so much of your stuffe from you , as shall lessen you Coat , and inlarge their Vailes .

Your , Mason , your Smith , your Carpenter , and all other Trades-men whatsoeuer , none excepted , doe all steale , all lye , all coozen : none of them deales truely , no not one . And which is worst of all , they take a glory therein , and thinke themselues , in so doing , to be iolly wise fellowes , and Masters of their craft ; holding those that deale more honestly ( if there be any such ) to be simple men , and poore seely fooles , that want wit .

Let vs looke a little backe , and see , if we shall not finde an Apothecarie in a Against Apothecaries . blind corner , who because he will not be said to say I haue not such a thing , or so , nor discredit his shop ; will not stick to giue you contrary Syrrops , counterfet Oyles , falsify'd Waters ; you shall not finde one Drugge that is of true and perfect goodnes , or any Compound made according vnto the rules of Art ; they mingle , baptize , and make confections ( according to their owne liking ) of differing qualities , and diuers effects , thinking ( in their poore discretion ) that there is but little difference betwixt the one and the other , though it bee contrary to all truth and reason . And thus doe they kill many a man , making of their Boxes , and their Vyals , Dags and Pistols ; and of their Pils , Pellets ; wherewith ( as with so many Bullets ) they lay vs dead on the ground .

But you will say , Master Doctor ouer-sets him , and that there is not an ingredient , Against Doctors of Physicke . but carries his eye , and direction with it , and therefore the danger is so much the lesse .

True : But if you doe not fee him well , he forgoes the cure ; and if you doe fee him well , hee prolongs it : And so by this meanes , some , nay , many times , his sicke Patient mis-carries , and is sent vntimely to his graue .

And it is a thing worthy the noting , that Lawes being the Daughters of Reason , if you put a Case to a Lawyer , or aske his opinion , hee studies it , and will not resolue you , till he haue well and truely considered thereon , because it is a matter of goods , or of Land , which may concerne a mans making , or marring .

But your Physician , no sooner comes in to visit you , but presently by the touch of your Pulse , as soone as euer his finger hath felt it , hee instantly knowes your disease , though it be vtterly vnknowne vnto him , and remoued as farre from his vnderstanding , as earth , from heauen . And then , ( that hee may not betray this his ignorance ) hee forthwith prescribes , and applyes such remedies vnto you , as are more truely meanes to bring you to your last home , then to restore you to health . Shall it not bee fit ( if that Aphorisme of theirs bee true ) that life is short , the Art long , experience deceitfull , and the iudgement hard and difficult , to goe on by little and little , as it were by degrees , till they bee thorowly entred thereinto , and become Masters of that which they would willingly cure , by studying that which they ought to doe therein ? To treat of this , would aske a long discourse . All goes topsie-turuy ; all Kim , Kam ; all , is tricks and deuices ; all Riddles and vnknowne Mysteries ; you shall not finde man , with man ; we all liue in ambush , lying in wait one for another , as the Cat , for the Mouse , or the Spider for the Fly ; who roming carelessely vp and downe , suffers her selfe to be taken by a slender thread , whilest that venemous vermine , seazing on her head , holds her fast , neuer leauing her , till shee hath kill'd her with her poison .

CHAPTER V.

How Guzman de Alfarache lighted on a Cookes seruice , and with faire Sentences , and good Lessons , sheweth , what he should be that serueth . He blameth gaming , and Gamsters . He declareth a pretty theft performed by him ; he relateth the Vices of Despensero's , Cookes , Butlers ▪ and other the like Officers . Of Lords , abused by their seruants . Of Kings , and their miserable condition . Of the vanitie of Inferiours , contesting with their Superiours . He condemneth those Masters , that ill intreate their seruants : And how they ought to carrie themselues towards them .

I Found my selfe free from all these things , as subiect to none of them , except infirmitie , and sicknesse . In regard whereof , I had a determination , to haue put my selfe into an Hospitall . I inioyed a free and flourishing kinde of liberty ▪ praised by the wise , desired of many , and so much applauded and Libertie , a great iewell . re-applauded by the Poets . To whose true valuation , all the gold and riches of the earth , are not to bee compared , as things of to poore and meane a price . I had it once , but had not the wit to keepe it . For it being my course of life ( as a thing whereunto I was accustomed ) to play the Porter , and carry burthens , and being now as well trusted , Guzman , 〈◊〉 Porter , or Basket●…carer . as I was knowne , all my care was ▪ to come acquainted with some one false Cater or other ( Gods curse and mine goe with him ) that was the Purser , Disbu●…ser , Distributer or Steward , or by what other stile or Title , in that kinde you shall call him . This Despensero , or Cater ( as you please ) had a good confidence in me , trusted me very farre , and would often send me away alone by my selfe , to carry those things home to his house , which he had bought in the Market . This my continued Conuersation and daily commercement with him , did ( which it should not haue done ) procure his good liking , and loue to wards me ; Insomuch , that he remoued me from that Office , and preferred me to be Scullion of the Kitchen , which was as much as my ambition could then reach vnto .

Hee would often-times tell me , ( and one day amongst the rest , and I remember it was in the morning ; he made me along Oration , flourished ouer with a great many of faire Promises , so that by climing from one round to another , I began to conceiue with my selfe , that I should come at last to be a a a A Ruler or Gouernour of a City , or Towne . Corregidor at least . ) That if I would apply my selfe to that Office , and take paines therein , behauing my selfe well and honestly , when I was growne fit and perfect , he would be a meanes to place me in Court , and put me into the Kings seruice ; where when I had seru'd so many yeeres in the Kitchen , I should be well rewarded , and might afterwards iiue richly of my selfe , and be mine owne man .

O how quickly did this vaine blast puffe vp my emptie Pate ; This giddywinde mill of mine was set a worke , and turnd quite round with the breath of his words . The aduenture I saw was small , and the gaine might be great .

Well , he brought me to the Cooke my master ( we being well knowne to each other . ) When I came thither , ( as if it had beene the first time that wee had seene one another ) he spake to me in a proud commanding manner . How now ( Sennor few-clothes ) what winde draue you hither ? What make you here , goodman Shag-rag , ) you Cauallero de * * Illese as , is a certaine Towne neere vnto Toledo . King Don Alonso . Anno Domini . 1176. made a Donation thereof to the Church of Toledo . But it is now reuerted againe to the Crowne . Illescas is an Arabicke word , and signifies , lasciuious & dishonest loue . Cauallero de Illescas , is a word vsed in scorne . Couarruuias . Illescas ? Haue you any businesse here ? or doe you come to abide with me ? Sure I was ill aduised ; for when I saw he began in so high a key , I was about to shew him my backe and to leaue him to himselfe , and his ●…ie ; ( for Summer was now fully in ▪ ) I started , and stood as one astonied , not knowing what answer to make him , but when I saw there was no remedie , I replide ; yes Sir . Come your wayes then ( quoth he ) in with me ; And if thou dost thy dutie ( said he ) and shalt deserue well at my Guzman goes to s●… a Cooke . The dutie of a seruant . Guzman his readinesse 〈◊〉 seruing his Master . hands , thou shalt not lose thy labour .

I told him , I was very well assured , that in seruing his Worship , I might gaine by the bargaine , but lose nothing , because I had nothing to lose . Then he ask'd me ; Doe you know ( sirrah ) what you are to doe ? All that ( I mildly replide ) that you shall be pleased to command me ; or my selfe either know , or am able to performe . For he that sets himselfe to serue , must not refuse ( when need is ) to doe any thing , but that which more properly belongs to the dutie of his place , he ought cheerefully to vndergoe it ; and to applie himselfe as well to the one as the other .

He seemed to like well both of my speech and vnderstanding ; and I hoping to be well rewarded , flew in like a Hawke for the prey . At my first comming , I behaued my selfe very respectfully towards him ▪ and serued him as punctually as I could ; and he againe made much of me , and vs'd me as kindly as heart could wish . But I did not only seeke to please my Master ( who was a married man ) and his wife my Mistris , euen in the meanest seruices , seruing them in all things else besides , both in Towne and Countrie , at home and abroad ; taking vpon me the Office both of Man-seruant and Maid-seruant , ( saue only that I had neuer a Gowne to put on , nor a Mantle to couer me withall , to waite vpon my Mistris when she went abroad ; ) But for all other seruices of the house , as sweeping , rubbing , scowring , setting the Pot ouer the fire , dressing of meate , making of Beds , laying the b b Estrado , is a kinde of halfe pace , couered with Turkie Carpets , and furnished with faire long cushions , whereon your great Ladies and Gentlewomen sit , when they receiue any Visits . But now adayes , your ordinary women in Spaine 〈◊〉 growne into this fashion , taking more state vpon them , then s●…les with their conditions . Estrado in order , smoothing and plaining it , that not a wrinckle was to be seene , and other the like seruices were my ordinary exercise ; ( And for that I was the only man , all this was committed to my charge : ) But I laboured besides to giue good contentment to all the rest of my Masters seruants . So that my heeles were as nimble to runne vpon the least boyes errand in the house , as the Stewards , the Pages , as the Mayor-Domos ; for him that rub'd the Horses heeles , as for him that was Vsher of the Hall . One would haue me to buy such and such necessaries for him ; another , that I would brush , and make cleane his clothes ; This man , that I would get his band washt and starcht for him ; that , that I would carrie some * * The Spanish word is , Raçion , ●…rata portio ; a set allowance . A silent ●…gue , and a ●…rue 〈◊〉 , did neuer hurt any seruant . prouision home to his wife ; A third , to his Wench . And all this I did without grumbling , or muttring , or any the least vnwillingnesse in the world . I was neuer any Tale-carrier nor sower of sedition ; nor did I euer discouer any secret , or report againe what I had heard , though it were not deliuered vnder the seale of Silence vnto me , or that the relators had laid their finger on my mouth . For I was not so ill bred , but that I knew very well , what , and when it was lawfull for me to speake , and when to hold my peace . Hee therefore , ( whosoeuer he be ) that serues , must haue an especiall care to obserue these two things ; Wherein if he faile , he will quickly ruine himselfe , by drawing all mens ill will vpon him , and making himselfe the most hated man in the world . Whereas nothing doth more recommend a man , then a faire carriage , and a faithfull heart . When I was chidden , I neuer replide : and made it my studie , to giue them as little cause as I could , to finde fault with me . I would not willingly haue any mans displeasure ; And all my care was , to doe what I was commanded . And when there was need of my seruice , or that my helping hand might doe any good , I was seldome or neuer wanting ; I was Iacke at a pinch , I was here , and there , and euery where . And albeit these diligences of mine cost me a great deale of labour and paines-taking , yet I lost nothing by it ; for the good commendations that they gaue mee , and the kinde words that they spake of me behinde my backe , and the hopes that I had to be well rewarded , when time should serue , seemed to me a sufficient paiment ▪ and I was well contented therewith . The good vsage o●… the Master 〈◊〉 a 〈◊〉〈◊〉 the 〈◊〉 .

Good vsage , is a great heartening to him that serueth : It is the spurre which pricks on the Will , and makes it goe forward ; it is the finger , that beckens our affections , it is the Lure , that calls our desires , it is a Charriot , wherein our forces ( like strong Iades ) draw on without wearinesse , and tugg , stoutly thorow thicke and thinne , it is good seruing of some men , and they deserue to haue seruice done them Gratis ; And there are some men againe , that a man would not serue for any money . But of all others , I disclaime that Master as vnworthy to bee waighted on , that will neither giue his seruant good wages , nor good words . Kinde vsage will make a man worke out his heart , but high language and poore paiment , will kill any spirit liuing , and make a seruant grow neglectfull , if not weary of his Masters seruice .

Then might I affirme , that leauing my roguish kinde of life , this Picardia The commendation of a r●…guish life . of mine , ( as a Queene , whose name I am not worthy to take in my mouth , and whereunto any other politicke course of life is not to be compared ) all the brauerie and gallantrie of the curious method of liuing happily , and passing well away the time , which the world solemnizeth so much , must yeeld , and giue place thereunto . But this , ( though accompanied with much care ) was exceeding good , good in the highest degree , for such a one ( I meane ) as my selfe , who had beene daintily bred vp in the midst of delights . So that me thought , I was in a manner reduced and brought backe againe to my old bias , and naturall course of life , as farre as it concernd the Bucolicks : for my c c The morsels I did eate . Bocados were of another kinde of qualitie and rellish , then those of the Bodegon , or a Pie-corner Tripe-wiues shop ; they were otherwise drest , otherwise season'd . And in this , those of St. Gil , d d The principall victualing places in Madrid , and what poore kinde of things they ●…e . Santo Domingo , Puerta del Sol , Placa Mayor , and Calle de Toledo , must pardon me , and hold me excused ; howbeit I cannot denie , but that their Liuer-slices , and their rashers on the coales , ran still in my head , and were hard things for me to forget .

I did nothing , were it neuer so small a thing , neuer so little , for the which I had not something . All did giue me one thing or other ; one a e e Quaedam moneta Hispanica , valoris 9. Marauedis , sic dicta , ab Tarja ; 〈◊〉 . scuti similitudine●… , quam habet . A piece of three halfe-pence . Gaming , a heartfull thing . Tarja , which is a matter of pennie halfe-pennie , another a Royall , a third a Doublet , a fourth an old Iacket to couer this poore flesh of mine : I did not goeso like a tattred Rogue as I did before ; my meales were sure and certaine ; and though I had not had any other thing to sustaine my selfe withall , I might haue liu'd very well vpon the skimmings of the pot , and vpon the triall of my taste , by essaying whether my boild meates were sod enough , and so likewise for my roste , reseruing still mine owne allowance whole and intire , I had no need to touch vpon that that I made profit of . This good did me much hurt , as also did my Gaming , which I had learned in my looser daies ; For looke whatsoeuer I got by meanes of my Place , for that I had no houses to repaire , nor rents to buy in , I plaid it all away . So that I may very well say , My good did me hurt . For , see how much increase it bringeth to the good , ( because they know how to turne it to their best benefit ; ) so it worketh as much hurt in the bad , for ( when they fall once a losing what they haue got ) they lose a great deale more with it , it being with them , as it is with your venemous beasts ; who draw poison from that , from which your Bees sucke honie .

Goodnesse is like vnto your sweet Waters , which if they be kept in cleane Goodnesse , what it is like vnto . Vessels , grow still the better , but in bad , are straightway corrupted , and quite spoiled . I was a learned Doctor in that Science , but yet I consumed my Estate in following that Trade . Within a few daies , I grew a refined Gamester , and could play well with my hands too , I had learned to filch and steale finely , which was the worse Occupation of the two . Gaming , is a terrible vice ; All manner of ●…ces are in a Ga●…ester . And as all Riuers haue recourse vnto the Sea ; So is there not that vice , which is not to be found in a Gamester . He neuer does well , and alwaies thinkes ill . He neuer tels truth , but still lies ; He hath no man to friend ; Hee keepes no good quarter with his Kindred ; He esteemes not his credit , but ouerthroweth the honour of his house ; He leadeth a lewd life ; Hee desires the death of his Parents ; He sweares without cause ; He blasphemes vpon euery little losse . He neither feares God , nor regards his own soule . If he leese his money , he loseth all shame to get it againe , and so he may haue it , hee cares not with what infamy ; He liues gaming , and he dyes gaming . In stead of a holy Taper , he holds a pack of Cards in his hand , as one that is resolu'd to lose soule , life , and all that he hath at one dealing . I had very good experience hereof from others , but I speake not that , which was told me by others , but what my selfe saw with mine owne eyes .

When my Vailes would not serue my turne , ( that I might not want wherewithall to game ) I would cast mine eyes , like burning Torches , about the house , where , and out of what I might make my prouision . For those things , that belong'd to the Kitchen , I could make purchase there in the turning of a hand , but euer had a care to doe it so handsomely , and to carry it so cleanely , that they might not haue the least suspition of me in the world . Many things which I stole , I hid in the selfe-same roome , where I found them , with purpose , ( if they should chance to suspect mee ) to pull them out in publike , gaining thereby credit to my selfe for after-times , vpon the like occasion ▪ And in case the suspition fell vpon another , I presently tooke hold vpon that aduantage ; and putting it from my selfe , transferred it on him . Once I remember , A 〈◊〉 the●… 〈◊〉〈◊〉 ●…uzman . I lighted on a happy encounter , which was this :

My Master on a time brought certaine friends of his home to his house , good-fellowes , sworne brothers to Bacchus , Pylots for a a Guadalcana , 〈◊〉〈◊〉 de la 〈◊〉 a R●…uer of recreation . Guadalcana , and b b Coca , 〈◊〉 a 〈◊〉 so called , 〈◊〉〈◊〉 ▪ ●…rmen are went to make the ●…sh drunke , and to 〈◊〉 vp their bell●…es vpon the water , as if they were dead . Coca , and he would needs for sooth in kindnesse bestow a Beuer vpon them , all of them playd well vpon the Keyes of this Organ ; the Iacks went vp liuely , but my Master he tickled it notably , hee was an excellent Musician vpon a iarre of Wine : he was a braue bottle-banger , a singular tosse-pot . Hee tooke me out of one of the cup-boords of his Ambry ( which were euer stored with cold meates ) a delicate piece of Bacon finely inter-larded , or ( to speake more properly ) inter-laced with fat and leane , which look't as fresh and as ruddy , as the bloud of a Lambe , that is newly kill'd . The game growing now hot , and the Vyes seene on all sides , they were all thirty c c A ●…yenta co●…-Rey , is the Spanish word , which is a ga●…e a●… Cards co●… amongst them . It is good ●…ing at 〈◊〉 , for ●…are of being out . 〈◊〉 . A d●…ken 〈◊〉 . apiece in Kings , merry , rich , and contented : And with this new Shooing-horne to draw down their drinke , they fell a-fresh to their former play , drinking Healths Helter Skelter , till at last ( and my Mistris had her share too , who did mince and gyg it in this round , with as much metall , and as nimbly , as the best dancer of them all ) they grew so fine and so mellow , that you might haue stript them ( like Rabbets ) out of their Cases , and left them starke naked as euer they were borne , and yet they neuer haue knowne who had done them this harme . Their Peeces were ouercharged , the powder strong , the charge too great ; so that when the fire tooke them , the smoke and fume thereof flew vp to the highest part of all the chimney , wherewith the whole house was so shaken , that some fell downe f●…at , others re●…ed to and fro ; some tript both in their tongue & feet ; other were full of their gamboll-tricks , each man hauing his seuerall Posture .

My Master & my Mistresse ( as one of the neighbours told me ) scrambled ( as well as they could ) to bed ▪ leauing all the doores of the house open , the Table vn-taken away , and the siluer Gobblet , wherein they drunke their Healths , tumbled downe on the ground , all which made much for the benefit of the Inuentorie .

I was by chance at that time in my Masters Kitchen , scowring of the Panns and th●…●…pits , pyling vp the wood , laying it handsomely together , and doing other things belonging to my office . When that taske was done , and I had made an end of all my worke , I got me to my lodging , and as I past along , I found all out of order euery thing out of his proper place , all the doores open ; the Cup that was falne downe on the floore , I fortunately stumbled on ; it silently seeming to intreat me , that I would doe it the courtesie to take it vp . I stooped downe vnto it , to doe it that friendly office , looking in the meane while round about me , to see whether any mans eye were vpon mee , to spy what I was a doing ; but when I saw the coast was cleere , that there was not any body liuing there-abouts , so that no man could detect me , I put it vp , and softly stole away . But I had scarce gone foure steps from the place , when my heart began to beat a false alarme .

Then 〈◊〉 began to thinke with my selfe , whether I had heard any noise stirring either within or without the house , for I could not be too secure , and it did much concerne me , to haue a care to keepe my skinne whole , and not to indanger the losing of much , for the gaining of a little , and so in the end get a whipping by the bargaine . I got me in , I called twice or thrice vpon this , then that man , but not a word of answere that I had from any of them .

I went to my Masters bed-chamber , where I found him and his Wife in that case , that they seemed to be dead , and sure they were little better , for they were deepely buried in Wine .

The snores and snorts that came from them , and other the like puffings and blowings , which they breathed forth , made me to imagine , that I had beene newly entred into some famous drinking-schoole . I had a great mind to haue bound them with some whip-cord by the feet to the bed-post , and to haue playd the knaue with them in that manner , to haue made a little sport with them . But I did not like so well of that iest , a greater businesse was now in hand , and I thought it the better iest of the two , to content my selfe with that siluer piece of Plate : Whereupon , I made safe worke with that . And hauing now secured this theft , away went I back againe to the Kitchen , where I found worke inough to doe till it was night , about which time my Master came thither , terribly pained in his belly , & his temples . And finding there but one only fire-brand lying on the Harth , he would needs cudgell my coat therewith , scolding & railing at me , telling me that I wasted too much wood , and that I would neuer leaue , till I had fired his house . That night , was not a night of profit ; it was worth nothing vnto me ; yet I supply'd ( as well as I could ) what was wanting , and couering my Masters defect , supper was made readie , and orderly serued in , which being ended , and all things done that should be done , we went to bed . But I found my Mistris in an ill taking , her countenance sad and heauy ; her eyes cast downe to the ground , and full of teares , her heart swolne with griefe , all was out of tune with her , and not so much as one word , that came from her , till my Master was gone to bed . And then I made bold to aske her , what was the matter that she was so melancholly . She answered , O my Guzmanico ▪ ( sonne of my soule ) a great euill , a great misfortune hath befalne me , wretched woman that I am , cursed was that houre , wherein I was borne , and in an vnlucky time did my mother bring me forth By this time I knew where her shoo did wring her ; My pocket was her Pothecaries shop . There lay the rest●…ratiue : And my good will had been the best Physician , she could haue gotten for her griefe . But all her pittifull complaints , and whatsoeuer else might worke compassion , being all put together , could not moue me awhit . For I haue heard say ; Let a woman weepe neuer so much , though she should seeme to weepe her heart out , there is no more pitie to be taken of her , then to see a goose goe bare-foote . All her lamentations , her wringing of her hands , and other her demonstrations of her sorrow , could not stirre vp pitie in me , or take hold on the least haire of a fellow-kinde of feeling .

But feigning my selfe to be very sensible of her affliction , & that it grieu'd me much to see her so surprized with griefe , I began to comfort her , and to perswade her ( al that I could ) that her impatience might not force such words from her , as I heard her but now vtter , requesting her , that she would lay open the wound , and tell me what she ayld , and make mee a sharer ●…n this her misery ; promising ( in all that little , that I was able to do ) to doe as much for her , as I would for mine owne Mother . O sonne ( quoth she ) your Master ( in an ill houre ) brought hither certaine of his friends to make merry this afternoone , and amongst other things , my siluer Gobblet is wanting , and I know not in the world what to doe . What will thy Master say , or doe , when he shall know it ? O he will kill me ( sonne of my bowels , mine owne deare child ) he will kill me , that is the least he can doe vnto me . And what I pray can he doe more , said I with my selfe ? Well , I put on a mourning-face , looke sad , shewing how much I was displeased with this roguish dealing , and how much it did vexe me for her sake . And then calling my wits together , I told her , that there was no other way in the world to salue this sore , but that she should be stirring very early in the morning , and get her to the Gold-smiths , and buy another like vnto it , and then tell her Husband , that because the siluer cup was old , and stained with many spots , she had caus'd it to be new burnish't ouer , and made as bright as it was the first day it was bought .

And by this meanes , this cloud , that threatens such a foule storme , will quickly be ouer-blowne , and all be faire weather againe with you .

I offred her withall , that if she wanted money , shee should make shift to take it vp vpon credit , she should haue my allowance and my Vailes , till all was paid , if shee did not finde meanes before of her owne to discharge the debt . She did with a great deale of thankefulnesse entertaine what I had spoken , as well for my good counsels , as the speedy remedy . But it seemed vnto her , that it would bee very vnfitting for her to goe from home , and that all alone , and so early in the morning , fearing lest her Husband might chance to know it , who was very iealous of her , and would thinke , shee had gone a gadding to some worser purpose . Wherevpon , she intreated me of all Loues , euen for Gods sake , that I would goe my selfe to see and I could get such another as that was ; and as for the money , she had inough of her own store to pay for it . This was e'ne as I would haue it , it hit as pat as a pudding to a Fryers mouth , I could not haue wisht it to haue falne out better ; for I had already begun to deuise and cast with my selfe , to whom , or how I might sell it , and what chapman I might best finde out to buy it of mee ; for if they should come to scanne my person , they might easily be induced to beleeue , that I had stolne it .

But this businesse falling out so luckily , and all things sorting so well with me , I went amongst the Gold-smiths , & spake to one of them , that he would make cleane this plate , take out the staines , and beat out the dents , for it had taken some knocks in the fall ; I agreed with him for two Royals , for which price he finished his worke , and made it looke as fresh and as new , as if it had beene newly bought out of the shop ; I tooke my cup , and carried it home with me to my Mistris , telling her , that I had met with this piece at the puertade a a A place so called 〈◊〉 Madrid . Guadaxara , and that it amounted in weight to seuen and fifty Royals , and for the fashion he would not abate a farthing of eight Royals .

All this seemed to her , as if it had been but one poore Blanke , considering the great desire which she had to be freed from that trouble wherein she was . She told me out the money vpon a table , so that I sold her her owne againe , as if it had not been the same , or that I had beene the man that had stolne it from her . Wherewith she remained contented , and I satisfied . But lightly come , lightly gone : Two incounters carried it cleane away from me .

These petty thefts of wit , I reckned as things of nothing , and occasion taught me the way : These were naturall vnto mee . But those of permission , and of greater moment , I took great care in the managing of them , when need did require : it was a common thing with me , to come neere to the Butchers chopping-blocke , where the portions allotted to euery man for their allowance , were cut out and diuided . I did diligently obserue that which passed , I Your Catr●…rs , your Cookes , and your Butlers , a company of coo●…ening knaues . learned the trick of the finger , the bounding of the ballance , and al the tricks of weighing ▪ & many would say , I weigh'd passing well , yet so for mine own aduantage , that euery mans part should dayly come short two ounces in weight .

The Despensero , he would answer for himselfe , that the flesh did shrinke and drie away , and though he receiued full weight , and the Scales true , yet there could not choose but be some losse therein , by cutting it out afterwards into so many seuerall pieces for Commons , which might very well take vp a sixt part . Your Despensero , your Cooke , your Butler , your Purueyour , and most of all your Officers , they doe all of them filch and steale , and sticke not to say , it is their Fees , and that it belongs of right vnto them , and this they so openly and impudently maintaine , as if they had the Kings Letters b b The Spanish word is Esecutoria . i. el Instrumento y auto de lo determinado en juizio , por tres Sententias . Couarruuias . Ver. Esec . Patents to shew for it .

There was neuer yet any Kitchen-boy so foolish or so vnluckie , but that he would make a shift to meet with the giblets of your Geese , your Hens , and your Capons , with the hocks of a gammon of Bacon , your flaps , Kidnies , and fat of the shoulders and loines of Mutton , your Pigs-pettitoes , your Calues-feet , Liuars , Gisards , Sweet-breads , Sauces , Spices , Snow , Wine , Sugar , Oyle , Honie , Candles , Coles , and Wood , not sparing the very Ashes , nor any thing else , ( were it Vineger , Mustard , Annis-seede , Carrowaies , ) from that which was most necessarie , euen to those of smallest moment , which are daily spent in a great mans house .

When I came thither first , I confesse , there was no man would trust mee farther then he saw me , they had no great confidence of me ; but by little and little , I got into credit by degrees , first pleasing this man , then contenting that man , and in fine , being willing to serue them all , in all that I was able : for he must haue a care to please all , that will haue all men to pleasure him . To gaine friends , is a putting forth of money to Interest , and the sowing of He must doe , that will receiue a pleasure . Friends and ●…oes , how to be kept , or auoyded . seed in a fruitfull soyle . A man ought to venture his life , for the keeping of a friend , and the spending of his wealth , for the vn-procuring of an enemie . For such a one is a Sentinell , that sees with a hundred eies ; hee is like a Dragon , that stands vpon the Tower of his malice , to looke into our actions from afarre , and to watch vs a mischiefe , if we doe amisse . It importeth much , not to haue an enemie , and he that hath , let him carrie himselfe so towards him , as though he were by and by readie to become his friend .

Wouldst thou know who this is ? Behold his name , and thou shalt finde How a man should behaue himselfe towards his enemie . him to be all one with the Deuill , our mortall enemy , and both of them , to be one , and the selfe-same thing . Doe thou sowe good workes , and thou shalt reape the fruit of them . For the first ( whosoeuer hee were ) that did a benefit , wrought chaines therewith to imprison noble spirits , and to binde their hearts vnto him in the bonds of loue . In those things , wherein I might put my selfe forward , I was neuer slothfull ; I did neuer giue way to any iust complaints to come against mee ; nor was I euer giuen to faction , or to the raising of calumnies and euill reports vpon any ; I did abhorre all colours of this nature , and aboue all , your scandalous and offensiue persons , whom wee Scandalous persons , what they are like vnto ? properly compare vnto Sponges , who what they sucke in one place , haue it wrung from them in another , if they doe not drop it out of themselues , which is too vsuall with them . Such men as these , see thou trust them not , shunne their fellowship , abhorre their company , though thou wert sure to get by them . For in the end , thou shalt sit downe with losse , and shame enough .

A priuate house cannot suffer a greater calamitie ; nor a Common-wealth a more contagious pestilence , then these make-bates , these sowers of discord , these Court-chamblets , that are sprinkled ouer with holy water , whose glosse of words makes a very faire shew , but vnder that print ( which is quickly gone ) lies the deuill , and his foule deeds .

It was euer-more my chiefe studie , to haue peace with all men , because it is the daughter of Humilitie ; And the humble minded man , that loueth Peace , the daughter of Humilitie . peace , loueth , and is beloued of the Author thereof , which is God : if ill company had not done me harme , I had begun well , and gone on better ; I had had wherewith-all to eate , to drinke , to laugh , and to bee merry , and might haue passed this carreere of my life with a great deale of content . Many times ( when I had ended my businesse ) I would take a nap in the sweetnesse of that Sunne , which shew'd it selfe after dinner , and some-times I made my sleepes by Moone-shine , remaining in the view of that faire light vntill the morning .

But when there was nothing to be done at home , your Lackies and Pages of the Court , being a company of Crack-ropes and notable Wags , would make The Pages waggery with Guzman . me free of the frying-Pan , fright me with Snakes , hang on my back , & weigh me downe , crying , More sackes to the Mill ; If by chance they found me asleepe , then would they clap a Flie made of Waxe vpon the instep of my shoo , and letting it burne there , till shoo and skinne were both scorched , and when I began to stir and stretch , then would their knauery breake forth , & cry , Fire , fire , fire . Other-while they would roll vp a Carde , or a piece of Paper , Tunnel-wise , & then setting it a fire , ( blowing out the flame ) they would put it directly vnder my nose , till the pillars of smoake that ascended to my nostrils , had not only awak'd me , but almost choakt me . I remember they vs'd me so once in this manner , that I knew not in the world where I was , whethersleeping , waking , standing or sitting ; I was eene mad , I had lost my wits amongst them ; and if I had not beene held fast , I had falne against one of the corner stones of the house , and dasht out my braines in a thousand pieces : yet I tooke all patiently , neuer opened my mouth against them , pocketting these and many other the like wrongs , which I passed ouer .

All which I did , that by correcting my selfe , I might conserue my selfe : choosing rather to kill my choller , then choller should kill me . Que el que todo lo quiere Vengar , prestò quiere acc . bar . Hee that will reuenge all wrongs , Prouerb . shall sooner end himselfe , then them . Larga se deueder à mucho , si no se quiere viuir poco . The man , that would liue long , must not be too short . This cuttednesse , hath cut off many a mans life before his time . But by slighting of iniuries , and letting them quietly goe by , he that does them , growes in the end both wearie , and ashamed ; Whereas if thou shouldst risent them , and take them to heart , they would neuer leaue persecuting thee , but be vexing thee still more and more . For mine owne part , if I should haue complain'd of these Wags , or but made any stirre in the businesse , I am sure they would haue made an Anatomie of me . I ( poore Scullion ) must haue turned Skellidon ; There had beene no other way with me . Sometimes , to make triall of mee , they would lay baits for me , putting money in some such place , where I could not choose but finde it ; and then would they watch me , to see , whether I were light-fingerd or no , and had , the art of taking vp , and were in the number of those that still take vp , and ne're lay downe ? But because I knew their meaning , and had found out the tricke , that they would faine put vpon mee ; I Prouerb . said with my selfe , It will not serue your turne , A otro perro , con esse huesso ; I am too craftie a curre , to be taken with this bone ; you must throw it out to some other dogge , you shall doe no good with it on mee : you haue mist your marke ( my Masters ) you haue leapt a little too short . you shall not goe beyond mee , nor shall you make your selues merry with my miseries , nor make merchandize of my credit , nor furnish your a a Almoneda , is an open sale at an Out-●…ne . Guzmans craft to pr●…serue his credit . Almoneda with my infamies . Therefore , it should rest there for me ; till he that had laid it there , should come himselfe and fetch it away . Still hauing an eie , that another should not take it thence , lest afterwards it might be said , I was the man that did it .

Otherwhiles I would take it vp my selfe , and come and bring it to my Master and giue it him ; hauing alwaies a great care to keepe my wounds cleane , and like a good Fencer , to come fairely off , without the least Vennie or touch in the world : For to giue another man a cut in the legge , or a slash on the arme , and to receiue a home-thrust , and full Stocada in his owne bosome , shewes himselfe to bee but a foole in his Science . I filcht and stole whatsoeuer came in my way , but still carried it so cunningly , that no man could haue cause to suspect me .

For those things that appertained to my charge , I was wonderfull prompt Guzmans diligence in doing his Office . and diligent , albeit my Master had beene carelesse in willing me to doe this , or that ; And when there was any worke to be done , I neuer stood looking , when my Master would bid me goe about it ; I would saue him that labour . I was the formost of all my fellowes , when Birds were brought in , to fall to plucking of their feathers , to scowre the Spits , to make cleane the Vessell , to sweepe the house , to make , and blow the fire , without saying to another , Doe it you . For I did consider with my selfe ; that seeing I was not to take my pleasure ; nor to stand like a Loyterer , with my thumbes vnder my girdle ; one was as much trouble to me as the other ; And me thought , it was a fine kinde of deceiuing of the time ; to doe that by faire meanes , which I must otherwise haue done perforce . And this made me indifferent ( so as I were a doing ) whether it were this worke , or that worke , all was one to me , since first or last , it must be done by one of vs .

I did euermore doe my vttermost indeuour , as farre as my abilitie and knowledge would lead me , reseruing alwaies the Decorum due to my Office . I was euer in Action ; I had scarce made an end of pulling my Birds , but I presently runne me to the Morter , and fall a pounding of Sawces , some for my Boyld meates , some for my Roast ; all my Iron Vtensels about the Kitchin , as Spits , Andiornes , Tongs , Fire-shouell , Pot-hookes , and the like , I kept so neat and so cleere , that they lookt like so many Sword-blades , whereon the Cuttlers hand had set a delicate Glasse ; my Pots and my Pans , why you might haue wiped them with a Cloake of Veluet ; my Skimmers , my Ladles , and my flesh-Hookes , were ( like Barbers Looking-glasses ) curiously kept in their Cases , and hung vp vpon seuerall Nailes , as all things else that were of vse , had their peculiar places appointed for them , that they might be ready still at hand , when need should serue , without being driuen to seeke for one thing in one corner , and another in another , bearing still in my minde , how and where I had plast them .

In a word , euery thing had it's deputed place , with much diligence , and very good order . At my spare houres , when I had nothing to doe ( which were likely in the Euening , ) for then I was vsually most at leisure ; the Officers of the house would giue me their a a The Spanish word is Percances . i. Quicquid acquiritur à seruis praeter Salarium . Dict: à perquirendo . Your Officers in great houses challenge their Fees , as a Tribute due vnto them . How the Cookes licke their owne fingers . Vailes , that I might goe abroad , and sell them for them . I went with them to the Gate that belongs to the Shambles , which was our set place for that businesse , whither came such to buy , as had need thereof ; Sometimes that which I brought , was good ; sometimes so so ; and at other times , stinking and starke naught . And all did arise out of that , which they call Prouechos y Derechos , Fees , and Duties , which is two , out of euery ten : a great deale better paiment I am sure , then that of the b b Almoxarifasgo , comes of Almozarife ; i. Exactor portoriorum . He that takes vp all the Kings rents vpon all merchandize , either imported , or exported . It is an Arabicke word , and signifies an Officer , that recouers all Rights and Duties , belonging to the King , bee it vpon Customes , Tenths , or payment of Rents : Father Guadix saies , this name by corruption , is borrowed from Al-Muxiuph , that is to say , a Teller , a Changer , a Banker , a Renter . Diego de Vrrea , That in it's Arabicke termination , it is tear●…ed Muxerifun , of the Verbe Xerefe , which signifies to see , to discouer . And so Almoxarife may be taken for a Seer or Discouerer . And the reason of it is , for that he sees and discouers all the Merchandize that passeth to and fro , to recouer what is due to the King , and to 〈◊〉 the other passe free . This in ancient time , was a generall name to all Treas●…rers , till the daies of King Alonso II. Who disc●…rded it , because it was Mo●…ish , and changed the Title into Tesorero generall . 〈◊〉 . Lord high Treasurer . 〈◊〉 . Almoxarifasgo of Seuilla ; Seldome or neuer were wanting vnto vs the Menudillos or entrailes of your Birds , the mammocks of Veale , Partridges and Hens , which were spoiled or lost in the spitting or the roasting , or had clung in the boiling to the Pots side , or falne in sunder by being ouer-sod ; in the stripping and vncasing of Rabbets and Conies , and the Lard bestow'd vpon them , being bordered about , and imbroydered as it were with Bacon , like vnto one of your Gabardines of Sayago , scarce leauing so much white as the bredth of my naile , through which their larding-Needles had not past . There were some other commodities , which being kept too long , before they came to be sold , beganne to stinke ; these they had a tricke to disguise in that handsome manner , that they should seeme to be fresh and sweet . Euery one did set forth his own ware , as well as he could . I sold likewise Neats-tongues , Hogs-cheeks , powdred pessels of Porke , English Pasties of Venison , and pieces of Bacon , three fingers thicke of fat . Behold , what vndue duties , what vnprofitable profits , and what hurtfull and vngaineful gaines these were ; things able to vndoe a Noble man , to make him waste his Wealth , morgage his Lands , and sell his Vassals .

I pity ye ( poore Lords , ye Gentlemen that keep good Houses ) who either can not , or know not , ( or to speake truely ) will not consume this Locust , this Caterpiller , by destroying so harmfull a moth . And thrice vnhappy they , who for ostentations sake , will offer to throw the Barre , with those that are able to out-fling them , and striue in a brauery to ouer-doe their strength , which may cause a spraine , if not a Rupture in their Estates .

The c c The Spanish word is , Gana-pan , quasi ganar el pan . Acquirere panem & victum sudore faciej . The condition of of a King , what it is , in comparison of other men . Porter , as well as the Trades-man ; the Trades-man , as the Merchant ; the Merchant , as the Gentleman ; the Gentleman , as the Knight ; the Knight , as a Grande ; and the Grande , as a King ; all desire to bee in-throaned , and to out-strip one another , by liuing aboue their compasse , and spending beyond their means . But in troth , the Office of a King , that is no good Place , there is no sport in it , no mirth no iollity . For a King neither sleepeth so soundly , nor resteth so quietly as the poore Porter doth ; neither doth hee eate his meat with that merry heart and free from all care , as doth the Trades-man . The care of one Crowne afflicts him more , then that of many doth the Merchant . He is troubled more in making prouision for his Armies , then a Gentleman in preparing his Armes : Nor is there any Knight or Titulado so much impawned , or so deepely in debt , but that his King is much more : Nor any Grande so great , but that the troubles and griefes which attend a King , are farre greater . He must keepe watch and ward , when others securely sleepe . His eyes ( like your shops on worky-dayes ) must be still open , that those of his Subiects may be shut vp , and keepe Holy-day . And therefore the Egyptians , when they would Hieroglyffe a King , and by some mystical Cyphers , expresse his vigilancy ; A vigilant King , how depainted by the Egyptians . they did put a Scepter in his hand , with an eye on the top of it . Hee trauels hard , when all others take their ease and laugh ; for he is both Coach , and Coach-man . He sighs , and groanes , when others , sport , and play ; yet few are they , that take pitie of him , or are sensible of his sorrowes , vnlesse it be for The wretched estate of a King . their owne priuate interest . Whereas indeed , onely for his owne sake , and for that generall care that he hath of all , he ought of all , to be both loued , feared , and respected .

Few informe him of the truth , for feare of drawing hatred vpon themselues : Few , if he be in an errour , will seeke to put him out of it , and they know well inough , why , and wherefore they let him alone , and suffer him to goe on in 't ; and so doe we too : Onely forsooth to put themselues forward , and that they may come to mount and soare the higher , and the sooner , though it bee with waxen wings , and must in the end , like Icarus , come tumbling downe , and fall into the Sea , where they , and their fortunes , are to sinke for euer , neuer to be seene more .

But what doe I talke of these transcendencies ? I diuine nothing . They are things out of my element , and therefore I will let them alone . It is mens foolishnesse , and their want of iudgement and discretion ( as I told you before ) that leades them thus along ( deceiued with these vanities ) to their destruction The miserable condition of your great Lords and Gentlemen . and of all other , most miserable are your great Lords , & other Noble Gentlemen , who spending where they need not , fall into need themselues . For euen small and slight expences , vsed often & too abundantly , consume the substance , their feathers begin to faile them , they fall away by one and by one ; heere lose a principall , there a Sarcell , and so in the rest : so that ( hauing neuer a sound feather left , neither in wing , or traine , wherewith to maintaine their flight : ) they are called Pelones , or Pelados , peel'd Gentlemen , that haue had their Plumes pluckt . Whereupon they are forced to retire themselues home into the Country , to liue vpon some poore Farme or other , where they must spend their time in breeding of Cattel , as Pigs , Hens , and Chickens , and the like , reckoning the Egges that are dayly laid , making account thereof , as of his chiefest liuing .

Hence therefore I set downe this as a ruled Case ; That if a rich man will Profitable lessons both for rich and poore . gouerne himselfe , he shall neuer be poore . And if a poore man will be thriuing , he shall quickly be rich . Both of them applying themselues in all things , according to the time , and as they see occasion . For it is not alwayes fit for a Gentleman to saue ; nor for a poore man to spend . There are entertainments to be had , but such as are rather to be had for intertainment then vndoing .

Vpon occasion , euery man ought to shew himselfe , like himselfe , according to the meanes that God hath giuen him . For to this end hath hee bestowed these his blessings vpon him . But not that all men should walke cheeke by ioule , foote by foote , side by side one with another , as if they were all fellowes , and no difference of Estates , or Persons .

If a Noble man shall be a great spender , let a meaner Gentleman hold his hand , and let him not be-foole himselfe , to thinke , that hee can doe as much with three , as the other with thirty He doth not consider that these are abortiue births ; and things that are out of their naturall course : whereby he becomes a by-word , and laughing stocke among the people : and his wealth being wasted , turnes begger , and mewes himselfe vp in a corner , and dares not be seene . That man doth not vnderstand , ( who is not of good ability ) that he does ill ; to seeme to be a Cocke , before hee be out of the shell , and to stretch out his throat , as if he would ouer-crow all the world . If hee be a Rauen , and can but croke at the best , why will he offer to sing and put forth his voice ? Or why , when some Flatterer shall tell him that hee hath an excellent ayre , and sings exceeding sweetly : doth he not perceiue that he onely commends him , to make him ( as it is in the Fable ) let fall his Cheese , and then laugh at him when he ha's done ? The selfe-same Lesson I reade to all , that euery man would learne to know himselfe : let him try the temper of his Steele , and let him not goe about to fyle iron with a fyle of wood , lest hee finde it lost labour . And when he heares a man murmure at another , let him shut the doore , lest another may murmure at him .

It is fit , that wee should all sleepe vpon on foote ( as the Crane doth ) when Good 〈◊〉〈◊〉 M●…jer of a 〈◊〉 our wealth , ( which is the life of this world ) lyes vpon it : casting about ( now that all is gone ) how we may doe , that we may not be driuen to steale . For to let things runne to waste , is not liberalitie , but loosenesse . And with that (a) The Spa s●… man of his 〈◊〉〈◊〉 gre●… that Prou●…e ▪ Tre●… al Mohino . which thy Catrer , thy Cooke , and thy Despensero , shall steale from thee , and neuer thanke thee ; ( for these are your onely three ( b ) Cheaters , ) thou maist reward halfe a doozen of thy other Seruants .

But I speake no more of their theft , then others waste ; for they will all steale , all filch ( ne're a barrell better Herring ) looke what is vnder their charge , they will be sure to nimme somewhat out of it . One a little , and another a little : and many a little makes a mickle . So that what with a little , and what with a mickle , it mounts to so much in the end , and makes such a deepe hole in thy mayne estate , that thou art much maymed by it , if not wholly swallowed vp , and vtterly sunke .

And heere I must not sticke to tell the Masters themselues , That a great part of this fault is theirs ; for that Seruants wages ( vsually ) are too short , and ill payd . For , if they be serued by men , that are in necessitie , and constrained by want , they shall finde few of them faithfull . Thou wilt not sticke sometimes in a humour , to play away at one rest , all thy whole yeares Reuenues . This is naught , giue it ouer . Pay thy seruants well , vse them with courtesie , and speake kindly vnto them ; for the rewarding and recompencing of seruices , makes the Master to be esteemed , and respected , according to his worth and qualitie , and incourageth the poore seruant , ( by requiting him for his paines , ) to serue him the better , and with the more alacritie . There are some Masters , that will not bestow a Royall on the best seruant they haue , thinking it inough , that they haue onely their bare wages , and that in giuing them that and their dyet , they are very well paid .

No ( my Masters ) this may not serue your turne , it stand's not with reason to Reasons , in sauour of ser●… . 〈◊〉 . doe no more ; for this is but their due , and deserues but little , or no thankes at all . But by giuing that , which is not their due , thou bindest them to doe more then their due , and winnest them to serue thee with the greater loue . Whereas , if thou ( being a Master ) shalt not inlarge thy hand , and bee better vnto him , then the bare bargaine that is driuen betweene yee , it is no great maruell , if thy seruant hold backe , and steppe not a foot farther then those bounds , wherevnto his Couenant binds him :

As it hapned to a cowardly Gentleman , who ( presuming too much on his A Tale of a miserly Gentleman . wealth , and the greatnesse of his meanes ) fell at odds with another Gentleman that was very valiant ; and finding himselfe farre inferiour vnto him , both in strength and in courage , was willing to intertaine a proper young fellow , of good metall , and approued Valour , to wait vpon his person .

Now it hapned , that this Enemy setting one day vpon him , this his seruant drew in his defence , and behau'd himselfe so well , that he made his Aduersarie retire with dishonour , and held him play so long , till his Master was quite out of danger .

In this fray , the Yong man lost his Cloake , and the scabberd of his Sword . When all was past , and this fray ( where of I told you ) fully ended , my honest Seruing-man gets him home , but his vnthankefull Master did neither make good this his losse , nor returne him any requitall in the world . It was this Gentlemans hap afterwards , to meet with his Master againe , and hauing a good Cudgell in his hand , he affronted him , and gaue him the Bastanado vpon the former quarrell : his seruant all the while stood still , and was content to be a looker on , while the other did beat him . His Master cryde out vnto him , that he should come in and helpe him . Your Worship ( quoth his man ) did agree with me to pay me my wages monethly , and I did couenant with you , to wait vpon you for it .

And for ought I know , neither of vs both are bound to any more . So that if thou mindest that they should strain themselues for thee , and do those things , that may aduance thy seruice ; with that which thou so dissolutely losest , and vainely and idly throwest away , gaine their good-wils , and thou shalt gaine this thereby , that they will not rob thee of thy wealth ; that they defend thy Person , illustrate thy Fame , and desire ●…y life . O how often haue I seene them carry away , and carried away my selfe , whole tartes of Manjar b b Alba , qu●…dam es●…a , Hispanis in vsu. A meate made of the brest of an Hen , Milke , Sugar , Rice , bea●…en , and all mixed together . One of the dai●…tiest d shes they haue in Spaine . This Manjar Blanco , was anciently eat●…n in Princes Courts , and Noble mens Houses , but now pub●…kely sold i●… the open Market . Blanco , Pigs , Pidgeons , Stock-Doues , Cheeses of a hundred sundry sorts , and other infinit things to fell , which are too tedious to relate , and I feare me , both time , and memory would faile mee , if I should goe about to recou●… them vnto thee ! Onely I will tell thee , that these disorders , beeing a generall disease , whereof all of them were sicke , infected me also , and made mee become as bad as the best of them . I liu'd amongst a company of Wolues , and I learned of them to howle , and deuoure Lambes , as they did . I was a reasonable good Scholler for my time albeit in a different kinde of learning , but at last , I lost all feare : I had learned now to swimme without Bladders ; I was slush enough now to forsake the nest ; all did game and sweare , all did steale and ( ) lurch , and I did , as I saw others doe before mee . From small beginnings , (a) The Span●…sh word is Sisar . Now Sisar , is to take out of that which is bought , or spent , some small part : As out of a ●…ixt part , one . And therefore it ought to be rather S●…isar , then Sisar , of the Hebrew word Sisah , Sextare , or to take out a sixt part . great matters arise .

I began ( as I told you before ) to play a little , to lurch a little , and to steale a little ; But at length , I began to inlarge my strides like little children , when they haue beene taught awhile to goe alone . I was now perfect in my pace , and had the tricke to make one in the hundred . I no more held it ill ( to such passe was my innocencie come ) but as a thing lawfull , and to bee permitted , I bought there with some few necessaries , that I stood in need of ; the rest I threw away at play ; for in my gaming . I alwaies made choice of those games that were the most vertuous , either in Dice , b b The Spa●…sh word●… , are Bueltos , y Ca●…eta : Games much vsed amongst the Spaniards . or Cardes , such as were the nimblest to ridd a man of his money , that I might make an end of it quickly , and get me home to execute mine Office .

I once remember , that contesting about a Chance with other young Lads about my pitch , we were so loud , in one of the Courts of the house where we plaid , that with the no●…se thereof , you would haue thought , the whole house would haue falne downe about our cares . Our Master spake to the Vsher of the Hall , that he would goe see what the matter was ; who found vs together by the eares , which made the fault the greater . And ( exceeding his Commission ) he basted our shoulders with Cudgell-deaw , making the dust flie out of our Coates , till he had beaten our bodies all blacke and blue ; The markes whereof appeared afterwards , when we came to put off our Shirts ; which likewise occasioned the losse of my credit amongst them ; For , from that time forward , they had an eie still ouer me ; and lookt a little more narrowly into my water . And this was it , that gaue the first beginning to my vtter vndoing , as by and by I shall more plainely deliuer vnto you .

CHAPTER VI.

Guzman de Alfarache prosecutes that which past betwixt him and his Master , till being dismist , he departed from him : And takes occasion hereupon , to ●…ondemne Idlenesse and euill Companie , and those inueterated vices in rich men . Hee recount●…th the spoiles , and Trophees of Cookes ; and tells a merry Story , that past betweene himselfe , and the Cookes wife , his Mistr●…sse .

THat man is much to be commended , who knowes to gaine by his labours : But much more ought hee to be esteemed , who by his vertue knowes how to keepe that which he hath gotten . I did striue all I could to please euery body , albeit the ill custome of my former lewd life , did now and then lead me awry ; so that whatsoeuer I did , was like forced earth , that fell in short time to it's old leuell , and being all but counterfeite stuffe , were but Ap●…h imitations , contrarie to mine owne nature , and that bent , whereunto I had beene vsed . For that Glory that is falsely gotten , indureth but a while , it is not permanent , but quickly passeth away ; I was like vnto a drop of Oyle , that falls vpon a garment , which Si fresca no para●…e , breuemente se des●…ubre Prouerb . 〈◊〉 ; If it be not presently perceiu'd , and taken off in time , discouers it selfe , and goes increasing . Now , they would no longer trust me . One would call me , Ceda●…illo nueuo , the new little Siue , or the youth of three daies standing ; For as your new married Wiues , that buy a little Siue , to straine their Wine , or any other liquor , for some few daies , are very carefull of it , hang it vp vpon a Naile , or some woodden Pin , but anon after thinke no more of it , and let it lie tumbling on the ground ; so is it with your new seruants : you shall haue them at the first very diligent and carefull , and like new Broomes , sweepe all cleane , but after a while they grow negligent and lazie , and are wearie of well doing . Another would c●…ll me La Gata de Uenus , one of Uenus Cats ; A craftie knaue from the Cradle . But they were all deceiued ; For I was naturally good , and in mine owne disposition , I neither had read nor knew so much ; but I depraued this good nature of mine , and did ill dispose of it . Vice and want altred this my good inclination , and made me otherwise then I would haue beene . And what knauery I had in me , I learnt it of the Officers there , and other the seruants of the house . And these are they that I must thanke ; for they were the only men that brought mee to it ; I was but coorse Sugar , till they refin'd me .

There are some happie theeues , that come to be old men before they die ; others are so vnlucky , that for the very first robberie , that euer they committed , haue beene taken in the manner , and presently hanged , without any more adoe . That which in others was but a veniall , was in me , a mortall sinne . And it was fit it should be so , because I did degenerate from what I was , by doing that which I ought not to haue done . I did vndoe my selfe by ill company ; Ill companie , i●… the Author of all mischiefe . which is Vices Ladder , Vertues Hangman ; the Wine that makes drunke ; the Smoake that choaketh ; the Sorceresse that bewitcheth ; Marches Sun-shine , a deafe Adder , and an intising Syrene .

When I first began to serue , I applied my selfe to my worke , and sought to please ; but afterwards , my ill-acquaintance ( bad friends as they were ) did sweetly vndoe me . Idlenesse , was a great helpe thereunto , if not the sole cause of all my hurt . For , as vnto him that is well occupied , no Vertue is wanting ; Idlenesse , what kinde of thing it is . What euill effects it bringeth forth . so vnto him that is idle , there is no Vice , which is not his Companion . Idlenesse is the high way to destruction ; it is that spacious field , that opens to perdition ; it is that Plough , wherewith bad thoughts are sowne ; It is the seed of Tares , cast into the ground ; it is that Woman-weeder that plucks vp goodnesse by the roots ; It is that Sickle , that cuts downe all our good works ; It is that Flaile , which thresheth all honour out of vs . It is that Cart , which comes loaden home with mischiefe ; and it is that Ba●…ne , wherein all the Vices in the world are mowed , and stored vp . Mine eie was not set vpon my He that will not doe ill , must looke well into himselfe . selfe , but on others ; and looke what I saw them doe , that ( me thought ) was likewise law full for me : Not considering , that because they were in places of credit , ( that were able to beare them out ) and being old-beaten soldiers in all manner of theeueries , it might become them well enough to doe as they did ; for by this meanes , they were to make themselu●…s a Fortune , and to this end only doe they seeke to serue good Masters . I was willing to be one of the number , and would faine ranke my selfe amongst them , by doing as they did , being no way their equall , but a poore Picaro , a ragg-taild Rogue , out both of clothes and credit .

But if excuses may preuaile , and that I may say something for my selfe ; When I saw that euery man walkt so freely this way , without checke or controule ; it seemed to me to be the land of a a The Span●…sh phrase is , Te●…a de Xauxa . Permission ; and that I might passe vp and downe there as well as they : Being perswaded , ( as I told you before ) that it was a worke of Vertue , a very good deed , and very iustifiable , how be it afterwards I was beaten from that errour : My thought though was good , but my vnderstanding was amisse : For the Grace and fauour of this Bull , did in especiall words grant the vse and exercise thereof to the elder brothers , that are free of the Incorporation of the Rich and Potent ; to those that are Fauorites to the Proud , to the Arrogant , to Flatterers , to those that The Brot●…erhood of the Rich , what it is . And the euils that it 〈◊〉 . are neuer without Crocodils teares ; to Scorpions , which bite not with the mouth , but sting with the taile ; to smooth-tongu'd Parasites , who with sweet words cherish the body , but with sowre workes destroy the soule . These were the men that might doe any thing , all was well done that they did ; but in such as my selfe , it was falshood and roguerie , I was in an errour , and together with this my error , I became so dissolute , and liu'd so disorderly , that my disease euen a farre off might easily be discerned : how be it all was not worth a straw , as being things not to be reckoned of , or scarce worthy the talking of . It is a common saying ; Que el postrero , que Sabe las desgraçias , es el Marido . That the good man , is the last that knowes , what things are amisse Prouerb . at home .

Of all these my mad prankes , and crosse fortunes that did befall me , scarce one of a thousand came to my Masters eares ; Either because being willing ( as I was ) to please them , and to get their good will , they would not haue my Master to conceiue hardly of me , and so put me away ; Or else , because ( though now and then they would chide me , and tell me mine owne ) seeing all the World was alike , and that it was euery mans Case as well as mine ; they did not much wonder at it . But for some negligences of mine , and other things that were too transparent ; my Master grew some what angrie with me , and spu●…'d hard to ouertake me . It so fell out , that he was one day sent for to prepare a Feast for a certaine Prince , that was a stranger , newly come to Court , and carried me along with him , that I might transplant the Onion ; that is , take vp all the leauings , Reliques , Vailes , Profits , or Fees , ( as the custome is ) belonging to his Office .

Wee were no sooner come into the Kitchen , but all our prouision was brought in vnto vs . My Master fell presently to worke ; and very nimbly ; and with a great deale of dexterity began to chop this , to deuide that , and The fashion of your Cookes , when they are sent for to worke . breake that other thing asunder , putting somethings apart by themselues , others ( especially if they were all of a sort ) he heaped vp all together , taking the like order in all the rest of those things that appertained vnto him ( as a lawfull taxe and due tribute , payable to his place ) lest he might , ( being busied about many other things ) forget his owne right , and confusedly intermixe one thing with another ; it being meet and iust , to giue vnto Caesar , that which is Caesars , and that euery man should take possession of his owne , and quietly inioy what of right belonged vnto him .

Now , about the shutting in of the Euening , when it began to be darke , my Master willed me to bring the Sackes . I brought them , and fell to filling ; which ( being well practised therein ) I packt vp euery thing that was there , very handsomely , and very speedily . And clapping them on my shoulder at such a time , and in such a manner , that I might not be seene , he made me make foure returnes , in which iournying to and fro , I could hardly fetch my breath , so heauily was I laden . All ▪ and euery one of them seemed to me , to be like vnto Noahs Arke . And I doe not know , whether in it there were so many indiuiduall and seuerall Species , or whether God did afterwards create them ? Now ▪ when I had made an end of this businesse , he will'd me to make a fire , hang ouer the Kettles , see the water seethe , pull Fowle , scald the Chickens , sindge the Capons , scorch the Partridge ; in which and the like I bestowed a great part of that night . My Masters Cake ( good man ) did not bake halfe currantly , the byas did not runne the right way , he was shrewdly out of tune , and much disquieted in his minde ; it still running in his head , that his Wife was all alone ; and that she could not either well order such a deale of wealth as he had sent her in ; or that happely some vnexpected storme might befall him in his absence .

Hereupon , whilst his thoughts were thus troubled , he calls me vnto him , and saies vnto me ; Guzmanillo , I prythee hie thee home , and haue a care to that which thou carriedst hence , see that all be safe , nothing lost , open thin●… What are the Trophees of Cookes , whereof they make their Triumph . eies , and looke about thee . Tell thy Mistresse that I stay here ; haue a care to the house , and as soone as it is day , hasten againe vnto me . I did so : I deliuer my message to my Mistresse . I call for Pinn's , and Pack-thread ; I plaste them vp aboue in a Gallery , where they hung in a fresh and open ay●…e . There did I ●…yle vpon strings the Trophees of that Victory . It was a glorious and goodly sight to see the seuerall plumage , and diuers-coloured feathers of Capons , Partridges , Turtles , Hennes , Peacocks , Thrushes , Veldefares , Pidgeons , Quailes , Chickens , Doues , and Geese . And taking forth from amidst all these the Conies heads , they lookt as if they had come peeping out of their berries . I hung vp in another part of the Gallery Gammons of Bacon , ioynts of Veale , Red Deere , wilde Bore , Mutton , Neats-tongues , Pigs , and Kids .

Thus all the Gallery was hung round with this kinde of Tapistry , vpon very good Nailes & strong Pins , that I had put vp for that purpose . So that I assure thee by the faith of an honest man , according to that faire show that it made there , I had brought home two parts of fiue : nor was this Conquest yet fully ended ; for there were yet wanting those seuen * * These seuen sonnes of 〈◊〉 were brau●…●…rriours , and conquered all where they came . And their name is 〈◊〉 sed by way ●…f Prouerb , when something is wanting yet to be 〈◊〉 . Infantes de Lara , to make the feast complete . All the rest was very well fitted , and I very weary , fo●… had wrought very hard , though little notice was taken of it , and my requitall lesse .

My Mistris lodged in a lower roome , who like an idle Drone , left all the ●…urthen on my shoulders , and got her to bed . It seemed she had supt vpon salt meat●…s , for she had her a a When a ●…an has drun●…e 〈◊〉 , it is a 〈◊〉 phrase in Spa●…ne : Cargò Del●…ntero , He 〈◊〉 charg'd has forep●…ce . fore-head full charged , which was no new thing with her . I , when I had made an end of my worke , did the like , and went to bed . But the weather was so hot , that for a good while I lay scratching , and tossing to and fro , till at last , ( though some-what , I confesse , against my will ) I let loose the reines , that I might goe softly onward on my way to sleepe . In the end I fell a●…galloping , that I might the quicklier come to my iourneis end , and take my rest . And lapping my selfe in my Blanket , which God knowes was a sorry one , ( for in that Countrey , they doe not vse to allow Sheetes , nor any more saue an old Straw-bed , to such poore boyes as my selfe ) I was very carefull to rise betimes , according as my Master had commanded me . When behold , ( God blesse me ) about three of the Clocke in the morning , it beeing then the time betweene the two Lights , when it was neither night nor day , I heard b●…rieath in the Court a cruell skirmish amongst the Cats , which were making of a banquet vpon a piece of Poore Iohn , a dry kinde of Fish , which they had drawne out by chance through the Tyles of one of our neighbours houses .

And for that they are naturally of an ill condition , ( nor shal you euer know , Cats and old Folkes alike . when they are contented , no more then ye shall , when old men are well pleased ) you shall neuer see them eate their meat quietly , and without noise , but still purring and growling , though they haue neuer so much . Whether it were , that their Fish was good , and so lik't it too well ; or whether it were ouer-salted , and so made them angry , or what a Diuell the matter was , that they differ'd about , I know not : but sure I am , that with the noise of this their Warre , they did awake me , and made mee to listen after them , saying with my selfe , Sure the Diuell is in it , his hand is in this businesse , if the quarrell that was risen amongst these honest Cats , should fall vpon the true b b Sobre la capa dei justo . Si dize ; quando ●…aga ●…l , que no 〈◊〉 culpa . Couarru●…ia . verb. justo . mans Cloake , and make him smart for 't , that is not in fault : and should quarrell now at this houre , in so vnseasonable a time , about the partition of my goods , and then my bones to pay for the meat that they should eate ; making my Master thereby to mis-doubt my care , and so breed a difference betweene vs .

I lay in my bed , as naked as euer I was when I first came from my Mothers wombe : I did not thinke , that any body should haue seene me ; I started vp in a trice ; and as if the c c I●… is 〈◊〉 s●…ll i●… Spaine to h●…ue the Moores co●…e in vpon their coasts , and carry away many Captiues . Moores had been come to haue carried away all my kindred Captiues , and this diligence of mine would haue seru'd to set them free . I hye me with all the haste I can , and come running downe the stayres amaine , that I might bee there in time , and might preuent that mischiefe , which is wont to grow , when succours are too slow .

In a businesse of that importance , I thought all delayes were dangerous . The ridiculous ●…est that past between Guzman and his Mistris . My Mistresse as shee was gone to bed before mee , so she had got vp before mee . Which shee might the better doe , because shee had nothing to trouble her head , and had taken foure sound sleepes , was lapt vp warme like the Silke-worme , so that she had no more to doe , but to rub her eyes , and arise . She heard this stirre as well as I , and thought perhaps with herselfe ( as very well she might ) that I was fast asleepe , and did not heare the noise . She , though she went to bed in her Smocke , yet as her fashion was , she would put it off before she slept , and lye all night starke-naked ; and so was she now , hauing not so much vpon her to couer her nakednesse , as the inheritance of her Grannam Eue , neither Smocke , nor any other couering in the world .

And thus starke naked as euer she was borne , forgetting through her haste ; to clap any thing vpon her body , she came running downe like one out of her wits , with a light in her hand , to saue her goods . Her thought , and mine , iumpt both alike ; the broyle equall ; the diligence , in cau●… propria , in a businesse that ●…id neerely concerne vs both ; and the noise on either side but little , for wee ●…oth came thither bare-foote .

Now ( if it will please you to behold vs ) we both of vs meet in the Gallery , she strucken with wonder , to see mee there ; and I almost frighted out of my wits , in looking on her : She suspected that I was some Phantasma , some Hob-goblin , or wandring Ghost , and letting the light fall out of her hand for feare , she gaue withall a great schriche . And I that was affrighted as much with so strange and foule an Apparition , and seeing her to make towards me with a Candle in her hand , I gaue a greater schriche then she , thinking it had been the soule of the Steward of our House , who dy'd but some two daies before , and that he was come thither to leuell his Accounts with my Master . She shrik't out so lowd on the one side , that the neighbors might heare her all ouer the street ▪ and mine were so shrill , that they might almost haue bin heard all ouer the Towne . She fled as fast as she could driue to her Chamber , as if the Diuell had been at the tayle of her ; I stroue to make as much haste to mine ; the Cats they began to fly , and as glad as we to be gone . But to see the ill lucke of it , vpon the very first stayre as I was going vp , I stumbled vpon the Cat of the house , and treading vpon her in the darke , she scratcht me by the legges with her nayles : then did I verily thinke with my selfe , that some Ghost or other followed me at the heeles , and was come to carry me away ; and that he was now catching at my soule , and ready to teare it out of my body : wherewith being scarred , I fell , and brake my shinnes against the stayres , hauing grated off the skinne euen almost to the bone , nor did my nosescape free , that was broken as well as the rest . Neither of vs two could vnderstand , or certainly suspect , who the other should be , all did succeed so in an instant , and were both called out , at the sound of one and the same Bell ; till that I hauing falne on the ground and she hauing hid herself between her sheetes , we began to know one another by the lamentation and mourning that we made . With this fright that she had taken ( if the freshnesse of the morning did not occasion it ) my Mistresse retentiue faculty had shrewdly failed her , and the locke of her belly being loose , and the bolts of her breech none of the fastest , her Posterne doore flew wide open , and before she could recouer her Chamber , ●…irted the excrements of her intrailes , part in the Portal , & part in the open Court ; that White-pot of hers , being stucke full of Cherry-stones , which it should seeme she had swallowed downe whole . I was a good while , ere I could make all cleane , I swept it , and washt it , and did all that I could to make all handsome againe ; for the keeping cleane of the house did properly belong to my charge , as a thing wholly committed to my care .

Then did I begin to know that the Ordure and filthy sauour of such accidentall Stooles as these , doe stinke more , and worse by farre , then those that are naturall and ordinary with vs . But the cause and reason hereof , I leaue it to the Philosophers to seeke it out : It sufficeth , that it cost me a great deale of labour , to the detriment of my smelling faculty , and the great annoyance of my Nose : and this I dare be bold to make good vnto you out of mine owne experience .

My Mistresse was much ashamed of this foule accident , and I more : for albeit I did write man , yet I was but a young Lad to speake of , and a meere child in the knowledge of these things ; I was as modest , as any Maid of them all , and as tender-stomak't ; and had I beene more man then I was , I should haue been ashamed for her shame , and haue blusht , if not for mine owne , yet for her sake . It did grieue me very much , that I had seene her in this manner , as I haue told you ; for as I liue , I would not willingly for all the world haue lighted vpon such an vncouth casualty as this was : But ( doe all that I could ) she could neuer be perswaded , but it was my knauery , and my roguery , and that I did it of purpose ; nor all the oathes that I vsed vnto her , could make her to alter her minde , reduce her to reason , make her capable how and by what meanes this hapned , or giue her any the least assurance of my innocencie .

From that day forward , I vtterly lost her good-will ; and I knew so much afterwards by a neighbour of hers ; whom shee acquainted with all that had hapned . For that which did trouble her most , and did euen vexe her to the heart , was , not for my finding of her naked , and vn-array'd ; but because she had beray'd her selfe . As for all the rest shee did not care a pin ; for most women desire nothing more , especially those that haue a good opinion of themselues , haue consulted with the cleerenesse of their skinnes , and are priuy to their owne perfections .

When I saw that nothing would serue the turne , and that neither perswasions , nor protestations would perswade with her ; I tooke it for an ill signe , and beganne to thinke with my selfe , that some false witnesse or other would bee raised vp against mee , to cast mee out of doores , putting her Husband into an euill opinion of me , as if this ( poore innocent soule as I was ) had been meerely my fault . Neuer did she looke straight vpon me afterwards , nor euer exchanged word with me , good or bad .

When it was broad day , backe went I to my Mill againe , as I was commanded ▪ that I might fall there afresh to my drudgery . But when I came to my Master , not a word of what had past . I was Mum-budget , and durst not open my lips to him ( for my life ) in that businesse . He askt me whether all those things were safe at home ? and whether I had set them handsomely in order ? I told him , all was well , and well ordred . Hee imploy'd me in some things . And I can assure you , that my Master & his Companions , and I and mine , such as were helpers , and wrought there for him , had more ado●… , to gather together , and hide what he had stolne , then we had in the dressing and seasoning of all the rest of our meates . And how was it possible , that it should be otherwise , where there was no order taken , no agreement made , no account to be call'd vnto ? What did not we call for without controule ; what was not giuen vs without grudging ; what did we not receiue with a great deale of glory ; how little was spent , and how much was stolne ? Sugar was demanded for our Tarts ; and for our Tarts , Sugar . So as we had for euery thing twice or thrice ouer . These kinde of banquets , wee termed Iubilees ; because the waters were troubled , and there were store of Fish to be taken . The poison was throwne in , and they began to float .

This made me to thinke , seeing ( as the common phrase is ) that this a a Pan demi compadre ●…l ducl●… ageno . was my Gossips bread , but at other folkes cost ; that my fore-teeth were no lesse able then other mens , to gaine this Indulgence . For I likewise had a Soule in my body , as well as the best of them ; I wanted not a iot of any thing ▪ that should make me a man ; My Armour was not without it's Riuets , to buckle all close . And if I had a minde to the Crums that were falne vnder the Table , ( yet so , as not to seeke , to make my selfe equall to my fellowes , or to enter into comparison with them ) it might ( me thought ) be lawfull for me , to make some profit of other mens liberalitie , and though I were no Gamester , yet I might receiue b b Barato , is that m●…ny , which at play a man takes out of his heape , when ●…e winnes , and giues it to this or that s●…ander by , that he may wish him good lucke . Giuing lesse , or more , as their hand is good , or their game great or small . Prou. Barato , as a stander by . I waxed wearie with pulling Fowle , blanching of Almonds , and the kernels of Pine-apples , with prouiding of scalding waters , and other things : I had then on at that time , an old Shi●…t , and a Doublet that was all torne .

Amongst other things that came to my Masters share , was a Pannier of Eggs ; I made thither , and tooke out a good companie of them , some few of them I clapt in my bosome , betwixt my body and my shirt , the rest I thrust into my Pockets , and the linings of my Breeches . Now you see , I laid my hand vpon that which wrought my woe . But ( to speake the truth ) I did not doe this so much for mine owne priuate interest , but that I might say another day ( if I list ) that I kist the Bride ; and that it might not be said , that shee came forth a Maid : Or that it should be tit in my teeth ; that I had beene at the Court , and not seene the King . The craftie Rogue my Master had found me out ; and that he might sanctifie himselfe by my sinne , and iustifie his honestie by my theft , the Mayor-Domo being present , and other principall seruants of the house , when I was about to goe forth to put this poore purchase of mine in some safe place out of sight , he fell vpon me like a Lyon , and laying hold on my Coller , he began to play Rex with me , taking me to Coramnobis , haling Guzman s●…eales Eggs , and is taken in th●…●…ner . me by the haire of the head , and treading me vnder his feet .

You may very well imagine , how well conditioned this Merchandize was like to come home , being with his beating of me , he had broke them all to pieces , making both the Whites and the Yolkes , thus batterd both together to drop out at my knees . I could not but say to my selfe ; Sure , some Poulterers Planet doth pursue me , & my Choller had almost mou'd me to speake it out aloud . But ô ( thou notorious theefe ) how canst thou haue thy house hang'd with that , which thou stol'st , and I carried away , and yet keepe such a coile , and make such a deale of doe , for halfe a doozen paltrie eggs that thou foundst about me ? Doest thou not see , that thou wrongest thy selfe , in wronging of me ? But I thought it my best course , to hold my peace . For , in iniuries , the best remedie is to neglect them . It did grieue me so much the more , that my Master should vse me thus hardly ; had it beene done by a stranger , or so I could better haue borne it . But I must be contented with my hard fortune ; I saw I was to suffer , and therefore I past it ouer without any alteration of countenance , or replying otherwise vnto him , then by lifting vp mine eies vnto heauen , which were brimme full of teares , and ready to runne ouer .

Now the heate and furie of the Feast was past , and we were going home ; but as we were vpon the way , my Master said vnto me , What I shall now tell thee ( Guzmanillo ) hearken vnto it , and weigh it well , it is worth the noting ; That beating which I bestowed on thee to day , did concerne me more then F●…ire words and large promises , pacific anger . thou art aware : I know I had no reason to vse thee as I did ; but to morrow , I will giue thee a new paire of shooes , which shall be better worth to thee , then thy eggs would haue beene . This was welcome newes , and pleas'd me very well ; for those I then wore were old , and all to fitters . But I shrewdly suspect , that my Mistresse , after we were come home , had made her complaint vnto him , and spoken some ill language of me ; for from that time that wee entred in adoores , my Master did euer after cast such a sowre looke vpon me , as if he had beene newly tasting of Wine-vineger , so sharp a countenance did hee set vpon me ; so that now we heare no more words of our new shooes , they are forgot , and I must be content to goe without them . When I saw hee lookt awry vpon me , and that I found his fauour to bee with-drawne from me ; I sought to remoue all rubs , and to giue him all the content I could , seruing him with more care then euer ; without committing any the least offence , or being wanting in any thing that belonged to the businesses of the Kitchin ; I was not faultie in an hayre , because he should haue no iust cause against me .

Vpon a Festiuall day , ( as our fashion was ) we had made certaine Pies and Pasties , some of one sort , some of another ; whereof there was some ( though not very much ) of the Paste left ; And the Munday following , was the Running of the Bulls . In the dust-Basket , amongst other refuse-things out of the sweepings of the house , it was my hap to meet with the shanke-bone of a Guzman tries his wit to get some money . Heyfer , which was in a manner whole ; I had need of a few of Blankes to make merry with , and presently ( a toy taking me in the head ) in the turning of a hand , I had lapt vp my Shanker in the Paste that remained ; which ( as I had handled the matter ) was to the outward show a goodly faire Conie , that you could not distinguish the one from the other . Away went I with it to the wonted place , where I vs'd to vent my other things , with a purpose to coozen some stranger with it ; But because I was in haste , and could not stay long , I might not wait to make choice of my Merchant . There comes me to buy it of me a goodly graue Gentleman-Vsher , ( his head and beard as white as Milke ) to doe him a pleasure , I was willing he should haue it . We agreed vpon the price , and he was to giue me for it three Royals and a halfe . Me thought I saw the heauens opened , in hauing made so quicke a market . But the more was my haste , the greater was his fleame .

He puts me first vnder his arme a Reportorie or little Register booke , about the bignesse of an Almanacke , which he had in his hand ; Then he hangs me at his Girdle , his Gloues and his hand-Kercher ; with a great deale of deliberation ; After that , he takes me a case out of his pocket , wherein were his Spectacles : he puls them forth , wipes them , and puts them on , wherein hee spert two long houres . Then he went distilling out of a little leather Purse , one Quarte after another , and putting them in his hand , euery halfe Quarte , seemed to be a Quartile , giuing euery one of them halfe a doozen turnes at the least , holding them against the Sunne . I had scarce receiued my money of him , when lo , my Master was at my backe , who missing me at home , came forth to seeke me . And hauing thus found me napping , he tooke me fast by the arme , and when he had me sure , hee said vnto mee , What Pawne ( my Guzman taken in a fault by his Master . youth ) haue you redeemed here ? My Gentleman-Vsher was present at all this passage : the Deuill ( I thinke ) kept him there all this while , for the disclosing or this my secret .

I saw my selfe now in the suds , and knew not which way to get out ; ( I could not quote my Author , nor yeeld any good reason for what I had done ; so that it stood with me , as with prohibited bookes , or merchandize forbidden to be sold : and punishing me for my fault , he afterwards diues me into my pocket ; and when he had fisht out the money , hee cries ; Let goe you rogue ; Let goe , I say : Are you the man , that so many haue commended vnto me ? Are you that dead Flie , that would doe no hurt ? Are you that faithfull seruant fo●… sooth , whom I trusted with my goods , and all that I had ? Haue I kept thee in my house ? giuen thee of my bread ? cherisht , and made so much of thee , and all for this ? I will no more be troubled with such a rogue as thou art . See thou com'st no more in my house , and come not , I aduise thee , neere Guzman thrust out of his Masters seruice . my doore ; for he that will be false in a little , will ( if occasion be offred ) bee false in greater matters .

And so giuing me a cuffe on the eare , and a kicke on the breech , both at one instant , in the presence of my Merchant , ( whose dull fleame , ( the worse lucke mine ) would not dismisse him thence ) hee had almost laid me flat on the ground . I was so ashamed , that I knew not what answer to make him ; though I had stuffe enough in store for him ; But not holding it fit so to doe , because he had beene my Master . I hung downe my head , held my peace , and went my waies . For it is a greater glory to auoid iniuries by silence ; ●…hen to ouercome them by replying .

CHAP. VII .

How Guzman de Alfarache , being put from the Cooke his Master , turnes Picaro , and proues a notable cunning Rogue . How he hauing a great desire to see Italie , occasion was offred vnto him to effect his purpose , by the helpe of a theft , done vpon a Grocer , and how he went sheere away with it , and left Madrid .

IN all chances whatsoeuer that may befall vs in this world , Mas vale Saber , que auer ; it is better to be wise , then to Wisd●…e b●…tter then Riches . be rich ; For though Fortune should play the Rebell , yet Knowledge neuer forsakes a man . Wealth may be wasted , but Knowledge increaseth ; and of more worth is that little , which a wise man knowes ; then all that which a rich man inioyeth . There is no man ( I thinke ) makes any question that Wisdome excelleth Fortune ; though both of them put forward , and hasten to one and the same end ; which is , to adorne and set forth men , and to raise them to honour .

Diuers Philosophers , did diuersly paint forth Fortune , because in all things Fortune , how decyphred by the Philosophers ? she is her selfe so diuerse . Euery one did draw her forth in that forme , as hee found it did accord with himselfe , or as hee did consider it in another . If she be good , she is the Step-dame to all Vertue ; if bad , the Mother to all Vice . And him , whom she most fauoureth , she reserueth for most miserie : her courtesies euer ending in disgraces . She is brittle , vnstable , restlesse , Tanquam Figura sphaerica in corpore plano ; like a Sphericall Figure , in a plaine body . That , which she giues to day , she takes away to morow : she is the flowing of the Sea , tossing and tumbling vs to and fro , till she leaue vs at last vpon drie land , on Deaths shore , from which she neuer returnes to recouer vs ; And while we liue , inioyning vs ( like Players to con ouer our parts , and to learne daily new toyes & deuices , to present them vpon the stage of this World . Euery various accident doth disorder her , & steale Wisdomes praise from her . But Wisdome doth quickly repaire that which she ruineth : And redresseth those things , which she despaireth of ; shee is a most rich open Mine , from whence , they that will , may exhaust great treasure , like vnto the waters of a huge Riu●…r , which can neuer be drawne drie . She honoureth a good fortune , and helpeth a bad . She is siluer in the poore , gold in the rich , and a precious stone in a Prince . In the perillous passages , and in the troublesome chances of Fortune , the wise man treads safely , and walkes securely ; but the Foole stumbles and falls , though the way be neuer so plaine .

There is no trouble so great on the land ; no tempest so terrible on the Sea ; no storme so violent in the aire , that is able to withstand Wisdome , so that euery man ought to desire to liue to be wise ; and desire to be wise , that he What man should doe , to liue happily . may liue happily ; Her riches are perpetuall , permanent , constant , and certaine . But thou wilt aske me ; Whither away , Guzman , so laden with Knowledge ? What thinkst thou to doe with it ? To what end dost thou commend it with such large eloquence ? Why dost thou so earnestly indeare it vnto vs ? What doest thou meane by it ? Whether doth it tend ? Since you aske me , I will tell you . All this speech hath reference to my Basket , which was the Knowledge that I did studie , for to get meat to my mouth , which is a good point of Wisedome : For , Quien à Oficio , à beneficio , He that hath a good Office , hath a good Liuing . And he that hath no other meanes to liue in this world , and to passe ouer the necessities of this life , shall for me bee esteemed as much in these dayes , as Demosthenes was in those , for his eloquence , and Vlisses for his wit .

My naturall disposition was good ; I was descended both by Father and Mother Guzman complaines of his mis-fortunes . of a Noble and Honourable Stocke . This I could neither hide , nor lose . And therefore I could not choose but shew of what house I came , by suffering iniuries with patience , the onely tryall of valiant minds . And as badde men , by good things , become worse ; so good men , by bad things , are made better ; especially , if they know how to make true vse of the things of this world .

Who would haue thought , that so good seruice as I had done , should haue receiu'd so bad a reward ? And that vpon so light an occasion , and when I did least expect , I should be thrust out of all ? But in answere hereof , thou wilt happely say vnto me ; Such is the world now a-dayes , that for the same very action , for the which at this present , a man is accounted a good seruant , an able Minister well seene in his Office , and to haue behaued himselfe therein as he ought , shall againe at another time , for doing the very same thing , be neglected , ill thought of , disgraced , and vndone . And all to this end , that either herein we may see the worlds incertainty , and what errours it doth dayly runne into ; or else be brought to confesse , That God , to those , whom he hath predestinated to saluation , after sinning , sends repentance . O would to God , that I might be so happy , as to receiue onely a corporall punishment heere vpon earth .

My Master was now bent against me , his Wife had set him on , and he thereby so incensed , and so apt to take hold of any occasion , that euery the least shutting of the eye , or but the wagging of a Straw , would haue beene matter inough of exception against me ; and though I should haue seru'd him neuer so well , neuer so truely , and laboured ( as if my life had layne vpon it ) not to giue him any the least cause of dislike , yet all would not serue the turne , hee was minded to put me from him , and I must be packing ; faulty , or not faulty , all was one . Now I am throwne out into the street , persecuted , and put away : What shall I doe ? Whither shall I goe ? Or what will become of me ? Seeing I am thrust out of doores for a Thiefe ; who will now intertaine mee in his seruice ? Who admit me into his house ? Then did I begin to think of my former troubles ; & how well I bore them out , by bearing of a Basket . I was wont to be a Bunnolero , a maker of Fritters , Bunnes , and Cracknels , and was now faine to follow mine old trade afresh . It did not repent me , that I had bin in-vred to troubles ; for from them I receiu'd my reliefe ; and it is good sometimes to take them patiently , and willingly , to the end that they that are driuen to necessity , may the better indure them , and not sinke vnder the burthen of them , as many doe , because they haue not been formerly vs'd vnto them .

And because they can neuer faile vs in this life , but doe still wait vpon vs , it is fit that we should be taught how to entertaine them , that wee may be the better able to beare them when they come . Besides , they make a man submit himselfe to those things , wherein afterwards he findes a great deale of good . There is no affliction so bitter , from which ( if thou wilt ) thou maist not in the end suck some sweet iuice ; nor no pleasure so sweet , whereof thou mayst not feare some bitter end , saue onely in that of vertue . If when I was so well accommodated to mine owne content , I had not before indured some stormes of Aduersity , neuer in that faire weather of my Scullion-ship , should I haue knowne how to Sayle in my putting forth from the Kitchen , but haue shewne my selfe a raw Mariner , and fresh-water-Pylot , nor haue found things so ready at hand , where-withall to helpe my selfe in time of need .

What would then haue become of me ? Doest thou not see how troubled , how afflicted I should haue been ? and what hard shifts I should ( poore wretch ) haue been put to , when my Office was taken from me , not knowing which way to turne my selfe , what course to take , nor where to put my head ? All that I got I either plaid it away , or vniustly stole it . I had bought me neither goods nor land with it , neither house , nor cloathes , nor any thing wherewithall to couer me . All was spent and gone ; As it came , so it went ; in at one doore , and out at another ; what I gain'd , that I lost ; what I seru'd for , that I wasted : And as the Prouerbe is ; I had frutos a a Frutos , por pension : Quando del beneficio que vno tiene , da todos los frutos al pensionario , aviendole Sennalado la congrua . Conarruuias . verb. Fruto . por pension , my fruits allotted me . Of euils , whereof the least is the best , for all these mis-fortunes that befell me , my mayne stocke was still remaining with me , to wit , my lost shame . For what should a poore man doe with shame ? Bashfulnesse brings in no benefit . And the lesse shame I had , the lesse did those errors grieue me , which I committed . I was now well knowne to all the Towne , and I had money in my purse to buy me a Basket ; but before I would resolue to saddle it to my backe , I did night and day visit my Masters friends and acquaintance , to see if any of them would haue pity of me , and take me into their seruice . For I had learned now a little skill , and would haue beene glad to haue better'd my knowledge , that I might know how to liue another day . Some of them did relieue me a little , intertaining me with a piece of bread , or so .

But it seemed , they had heard such things of mee , that they quickly dismist me , hauing no minde in the world to receiue mee into their seruice . Might ouercomes Right : And where force preuaileth , there the Law goes to ( b ) Donde la-Fuerça oprime , La Ley se quiebra . wracke .

With these diligences that I vs'd , I had performed my duty , and complyde with that , wherevnto I was bound , that I might not accuse my selfe hereafter , of returning to my former course of life , out of meere idlenesse , and for the auoyding of labour , and that I might not worke and take paines for my liuing . But I assure thee , that I lou'd it then , as one that had experience what Vice was ; and knew very well , that by so much one man is more man then another , by how much the more he labours in some honest course of life . As the contrary may be said of him that is idle . But a man can doe no more then he can doe ; I did my endeuour . Nor doe I know how it comes to passe , that we desiring to be good , yet we neuer come to be so ; and though we propose it dayly and hourely vnto our selues , yet we doe not put it in execution We still desire to be good , but neuer are good . And the reason why ? in many yeeres ; nay , not in all our life-time are we able to reach vnto it . And the reason is , because , we either will not , or we do not think vpon any thing but the present . I began to beare my burthens , I did eate what was needfull , ( for I neuer made my belly , my God ) and a man ought not to eate more , then what may suffice for the preseruing of life . The excesse whereof is brutishnesse . For it is the Beast that gluts himselfe to grow fat .

By this my orderly dyet , and moderate feeding , my minde was not dull'd , my body was not weakened , I did nourish no ill humours , I did breed no diseases , Orderly dyet , a wholesome thing . I had my health , I was sound & lusty , and neuer wanted money to play .

In my drinking , I was very temperate , neuer vsing it but when I must needs , and then too very sparingly ; seeking to proportion my selfe to what was necessary ; and to moderate my selfe in some measurable manner , as well , for that Moderate drinking , healthfull . The contrary , hurtfull . it was a thing naturall vnto me , and agreeable to my disposition ; as also for that drunkennesse , did ( me thought ) very ill become my Companions : Who depriuing themselues of the sence and reason of men , fall sicke and ill : their heads turne to aking ; their tongues , to hoarsenesse ; their breathes , to shortnesse , if not to noysomenesse ; their eyes , to a swolne settlednesse , & dulnesse of Porters , and Basket-bearers , are for the most part , a base and brutish kinde of people . look ; their legges , to making of Congees and Honours ; their feet , to tripping of it this way , and that way , with counter-paces , now backward , then forward , as the Morris-bels in their braines should deuise them their tune . But ( which exceedeth all other mischiefes ) this inhumane and sottish Vice makes them a May-game to children , a laughing stocke to men , and a scorne to all the world . Such as these are Rogues , and for such , let them goe , for they are no better then Rogues . And I doe not wonder at it . For all basenesse whatsoeuer is ingrauen on their fore-heads , and is made iust fit to their measure , as being the off-scumme and refuse of men .

But for men of worth , and such as stand vpon their credit , as great and noble A 〈◊〉 for Noble men , and Gentle●… . Persons , and Gentlemen of qualitie , who ought to abstaine from these disorders ; let them take heed , how they giue any such scandall , to wrong their Reputation .

But for a Church-man to disorder himselfe , nay , but to goe a haires-breadth The like for Church-men . awry in this kinde : for such a one ( I say ) it is not onely a disorder , but hee comes within the compasse of being noted for a scandalous person , & a wronger of his profession , which cannot but resound much to his reproach . Let them themselues be their owne Iudges , and speake what they thinke of it , when they see themselues thus ouer-taken . Doe they not , for to maintaine their absurdities , seeke to excuse themselues by idle and foolish reasons , and make , I know not what vn-ioynted sequels , by which after one errour granted , they runne into a thousand : and yet perswade themselues , that they , and none but they , are in the right ? It is a sham●… to treat of it ; infamy to vse it ; villany to cloake it , and a thing vnworthy men , not to hate , and abhorre it .

We had in the Place neere vnto Santa Cruz , our proper Mansion , bought , The Market-place , the Rogues burse . and repaired at other mens cost . There were all the meetings and the Feasts . I was vp with the Sunne , I diligently waited on those Shops , and attended often on the Bakers ; and if I wanted imploiment there , I got me into the Shables , to see what good I could do there . I made my haruest in the morning , to serue me all the whole day after . The Parishioners there-abouts , that had no seruants of their owne for these businesses , would hyre me to carry home their prouision for them . Which I did faithfully , and diligently , without wronging them the least hayre of my head . No man of my place had more credit amongst them , or was better trusted then my selfe . So that my Companions wanted worke , whilest I had inough for my selfe , and some other good-fellow my friend , whom I would make choyse of to helpe me ; who would be sure to follow me close at the elbow . Then we were but a few of vs , and wee went vp and downe from place to place : but now there are very many , the number is much increased , and all of them haue their hands full , and glad is he that can catch them vp first . And I can assure you , that there is not any Estate , that hath more inlarged it selfe , then that of the Picaro's ; for all your Rogues apply themselues to the bearing of Baskets , and carrying of Burthens , they count it a very good Trade , and these Rogues grow proud of it . And to this passe doth mis-fortune bring a man , that his Infamy , he makes his glory ; his Basenesse , he counts his Honour ; and earnest , he turnes to iest .

It so fell out , that there were certaine Companies of Souldiers to be raised , and Captaines appointed for the conducting of them . Now , when any such thing happeneth , it is presently spred abroad ouer all the Towne , euery corner of the street is full of it , and euery priuate house is made a Councell of State .

Nor doth that of your Picaro's sleepe in the meane while ; euery Porter , and 〈◊〉 , and Car-men , & the like base Rogues will not ●…icke to talke of State●…sses . Basket-bearer will haue a hand in the Gouernment of the Common-wealth as well as other men ; they will fall into discourse of the businesse , vent their opinions , and conclude , what things ought be done , how carried , and who fittest for the managing of these great affaires . Nor doe not thou thinke , that because they are base in their qualitie and condition , that therefore they are the farther off from the Truth , or their intelligence the lesse certaine . If thou doe , thou art much deceiued ; for it is rather the quite contrary with them . For it often-times so comes to passe , that they know the essentiall points of things , and participate of the secrets of State ; and there is a great deale of reason for it . For , in regard of the vnderstanding , some there are , nay , very many of them , who if they would applie it well , and accommodate it , as others doe , making the like vse of it , haue it strong and good . Besides , sithence that they goe all day long from one place to another , through diuers streets , and into sundry houses , and being that they be so many , and so scattered and deuided ouer all the Towne ; of many , they heare many things ; and though it be vsually said amongst vs ; a a Quantas Cabeças tantos pareceres . Quot capita , tot sensus . So many men , so many mindes . And though happily one , or say a hundred , should shoot wide of the marke , and discharge the follies of their idle braines ; yet doubtlesse , there are others againe , that discourse wisely , and will come very neere vnto , if not hit the Pinne .

Now we ( hauing raked together all the newes of the whole Towne ) when we are met together , and are sitting at our supper , euery man opens his store , and tels what hath past in Court , some relating one thing , and some another . Besides , there is not that Victualing-house or Tauerne , but whatsoeuer hath beene talked of there , is brought to our eares . For there likewise are held your open Courts , and publike Assemblies , where all questions and doubts are winowed and sifted to the full , nothing escapes their search and inquirie ; There they limit the Turks power , reforme Councels , and taxe your Ministers of State .

In a word , there all things are made knowne , there all things are treated of , and they are the Law-giuers , that prescribe rules to all ; for they speake all out of Bacchus his owne mouth , hauing Ceres for their Ascendent , conuersing In Vino ve●…itas . with a full belly , and a free heart , and if the Wine a a Si el Vino es nueuo , hierue la tinaja . bee new , the Vessell will runne ouer , it must needs worke , and can no longer hold . With that then , which we haue learned from others , wee come afterwards to sit and determine of euery particular passage , euery man according to his seuerall opinion , setting downe his seuerall censure . One while we resolue , that these Companies are to march towards Italy ; and that went for good , and past the more currant amongst vs , because their Banners were aduanced towards Mancha , and were now farre entred into that Countrie , passing from Almodouar and Argamafilla , along the skirts of the Kingdome of Toledo , till they had got to Alcala do Henares , and Guadalajara , compassing all the way as they went , the Mediterranean Sea .

Me thought , this was a very good occasion for me to take hold on , for the Guzman , desirous to passe out of Spaine into Itahe . executing of my former desires , which with earnest longings did mightily spurre me on to vndergoe this Voyage , that I might know mine owne blood , and whence I was descended , how I was alli'd , and of what qualitie my Parents and Kindred were . But I was so totter'd and torne , and so vtterly vnprouided of all things for this my intended iourney , that the bridle of Reason made me stop vpon my course , and held me backe from going farther forward , it seeming vnto me ( vpon better deliberation ) a thing impossible to be effected . But notwithstanding , my minde ranne still on nothing else .

This was still in my head , and I could not beate it out . In the day time it was my studie ; and in the night I dream'd still on that , and nothing but that . And if that Romane Prouerbe taketh place ( Si quieres ser Papa , estampalo en la testa ) if thou mindest to bee Pope , thou must haue him writ in thy Pr●… . forehead : it was truly verified in mee . For , as I was beating my braines about this businesse , tossing them a thousand times to and fro , full of this solicitous care ▪ I sate me downe on the one side of the Place , neere vnto one of the Shops , where my selfe , and this my other Associate were wont to make our Rendeuo●…s ; And leaning my cheeke ( in a melancholy manner ) vpon my hand , being fully resolued to goe , though it were but in the place of a stragler , to waite vpon the Soldiers , and to carry their luggage for them , thinking this would be place good enough for me , if I could not light on a better .

Whilest I was deuising this with my selfe , on the sodaine I heard a voice , which said ; Guzman , Guzmanillo ? I lookt about , and turned my face towards the place , from whence the voice came . And I perceiu'd at last , it was a Grocer , that stood vnder the walking place vnderset with Pillars , that cal'd me vnto him , neere adioyning to the Butcher-row . I held vp my hand , and made a signe vnto him , that I would hasten thither . I got me vp , and came to see , what he would with me . He spake vnto me , and bid me open my Basket . I did so . That no sooner done , but he throwes me into it , about some two thousand fiue hundred Royals in Siluer and Gold , and in some few Quartes . I ask'd him ; To what Brasier I should carry this Copper ? Copper , you rogue ? Co●…e , vp , and away with it , for I must goe pay it to a Merchant a Guzman resolues to ●…cale a summe of money , and puts it in execution . stranger , that hath sold me some Wares at my shop .

He said one thing , and I thought another : which was , to shew him a tricke at the next turning . And beleeue me , the ioyfull newes of a desired birth , did neuer come more welcome to the eares of a louing Father : Nor the Mariner beaten by tempest , did with more ioy discouer on the sodaine the Harbour , that he sought to put into : Nor any rendred Towne , to that famous Captaine that besieg'd it , gaue so much content , nor had so sweet a sound with it , or afforded so pleasing an Accent ; as I conceiued then in my soule , hearing that sweet and melodious voice of my Grocer , when he said , b b The Spanish word is Capacha : à Capacitate . Open thy Basket . Methought it was a braue word , they were letters of Gold ingrauen in my heart , leauing it full of ioy , but much more when they had qualifi'd themselues , by actually putting me into a quiet and peaceable possession of that , which I was perswaded would be my best remedie .

Vpon this luckie incounter , I began alreadie to dispose of this money , and to change my course of life . I laded my shoulders with it , faining ; that it did weigh very heauie , but my heauines was the more , that there was no more of it . My honest Grocer , he ( good man ) goes afore , and I follow after , but with a wondrous desire to meet with some throng , or presse of people in some street or other , or to slip aside into some house , where I might effect my purpose . Fortune ( as good lucke was ) had , in the very nicke , fitted me with one , iust according to the measure of my desire . For if I would haue wisht for an opportunitie , I could not haue desired a fairer . For as I was entring into the principall Gate , I got me away some three streets from thence by a blinde Posterne doore , and fetching boords from one corner to another , with somewhat a quicke , but not discomposed pace , that I might the better auoid all suspition . I went away gallantly , winding this way , and turning that way , till I had got to c c A chiefe Gate so called . Puerta la Rega , where I eased my selfe of my load , and made downe to the Riuer . From thence I crost ouer to d d A house of pleasure belonging to the King of Spaine , not far from Madrid . Casa del Ca●…po , and being holpen by the night , I walkt ( through a little thicket of Alder trees , Poplars , and other well-growne bushes of thorne ) a League farther : in the thickest part whereof I cast Ankor , and had now pitcht my Standard , that I might with mature counsell thinke vpon things to come , and what fruit and benefit I might make of my late purchase . For it is not enough to begin well , nor to goe on well , but to end well . For to little vse serue good beginnings , and better proceedings , vnlesse they be crowned with prosperous endings . What good would this theft haue done me , if I had beene taken with it , but to lose that , and with it , perhaps my eares , if not to haue beene e e The Spanish p●…se is , auer comprado vn cabo de anno . i. La memoria y sufragios , que se hazen por el difunto , cumplido el anno que muriò . That is , the 〈◊〉 & suffrages , which are made for the de●… , the yeere being fully 〈◊〉 after his 〈◊〉 . Couarruuias . Verb. C●…o . hang'd for my labour , if I had beene of yeeres ? There I entred into consultation with my selfe , what I were best to doe : I made triall where the water was deepest , and there where the bushes were thickest , I made a deepe hole ; and wrapping the money in the linings of my breeches and my doublet , I put it in , couering it ouer very handsomely with sand and stones ; setting vp a marke , that I might not forget the place where I had hid it , hankering there-abouts , that I might euer and anon haue an eie vpon it , for the space of almost fifteene daies : And all because I would not trouble my selfe hereafter in seeking for it some two foot neerer or farther off , which would haue beene as bad as death vnto me , if I should not haue hapned to light vpon it , as soone as euer I had thrust in my hand . And the rather , for that some nights I went from thence to the neighbouring places there-abouts , to get me some victuals for three or foure daies , returning presently backe againe to my old haunt , keeping my selfe close , after the Sunne once began to peepe forth , in that Wood adioyning to the a a Pardo is a house of pleasure , seated in a Wood , belonging to the King of Spaine , neere to Madrid . It comes from the word Pardes , Par adisus , id est , hortus domesticus arboribus consitus , Pomarium . And amongst other significations , it is taken for a Parke . Genebrard vpon the Cantic . saith , Pards vocabulum est Persicum , quod in omnes fere linguas manauit pro horto pretioso & delicioso omnium arborum genere consito . Couarruuias . Verb. Pardo . Pardo .

Hither , in this manner as you see , had I with-drawne my selfe , till the Hue and Crie were past and gone , which vndoubtedly was made after mee . Now by this time , they had lost my footing , and I conceiuing with my selfe , that the Coast was now cleere , and that I might safely passe , that I might remoue my Tent , and march forward , I made me vp a little fardle of the old linings that were left of my Ierkin , wherein I had closely lapt vp this my heart-blood . So that I had nothing now left me , saue the old linings of my Breeches , a poore ragged Doublet , and a Shirt all torne and full of holes , but all as white and cleane as a curd , for I had lately washt them . So that I was apparelled all in white , being wonderfull well fitted for to make vp one in a b b The Spanish phrase , is Dança de espadas . A dance much vsed in the Kingdome of Toledo ; they dance it in their shirts , and Breec●…es of Linnen , and night . Caps on their heads , & bright Swords ; it is full of changes , and one amongst the rest , which they call Degollada ; proque cercan el cuello del que los quia con las espadas , y quando pareçe que se la van à cortar por todos partes , se les escurre de entre ellas . 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 siue , 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 . Couarru . Morris-dance . I got me two delicate fine walking Cudgels , which I had cut my selfe , and pill'd off the Rinde , and made as smooth and neat as could be deuised . On the one , I hung the precious bundle , which I bare at my backe ; the other I made a Truncheon of it , to carrie in my hand . I was now fat and full fed , and began to grow wearie of being any longer a Conie in that Warren , fearing lest one of the Keepers , or some other Ferreter , should finde me there in the Berrie , and pull me out as a suspicious person ; To preuent that , I began to take my iourney by night , when it was darke , going out of the rode-way , taking crosse , pathes , by-places , and vntrodden tracks , passing thorow La Sagra de Toledo , a certaine Territorie belonging to that kingdome , till I came two leagues beyond it , to a little place that stood in a bottome called Açuqueica , ; whither I had reached betimes in the morning . There I rested my selfe vnder the shadow of certaine Quince-trees , where I meant to spend that day . Where e're I was aware , I found hard by me a prettie young stripling , much about my pitch . He seemed to be some Citizens sonne , who out of some vn-aduised consideration as mine was , had forsaken his Parents to trauell abroad , and goe see the world ; He carried his Fardle at his backe , and being but a young nouice , bred vp daintily , and newly taken from his mothers teat , the Milke yet hanging on his lips , was wearie of his burthen , and himselfe seemed heauie , in hauing so heauie a load : sure , he had no great minde to returne home againe to his friends ; and as little , that they should finde him out . He walk't as I did , in the day thorow Groues and thickets , and in the night along the high-way , seeking couert , where to shrowde himselfe . Which the rather I ghes●…e to be so , for that , from our arrinall there , vntill it were night , that we were to depart , he did not budge a foot from the place where I was . When we were to goe our waies , taking vp his Fardle very heauily , he let it fall againe to the ground , saying , Gods curse goe with thee , a little thing would make mee to leaue thee here behinde mee .

Now , I must tell you by the way , that we had had some talke together before , and exchanged ( as occasion offred ) good store of words , taking account one of another of our Voyages , and what , and whence we were ; He did not deale truly with me , and I would not confesse my selfe to him ; For by mine owne lies , I knew those that he told me . And so wee were both payd in our owne coyne . All that I could sucke from him , was ; that he acquainted me with his wants .

Now finding the coniuncture good , and the distaste great , which he had taken at that heauy burthen which he bore at his backe ; but much more , that his purse was so light , I began to coniecture with my selfe , that it might haply be a sute of cloathes : Wherevpon , I askt him , what luggage was that he carried , which did giue him so much trouble , and made him so weary ? He●… told me it was a sute of apparell . This suted well with my desires ; the induction ( me thought ) was good . Therevpon , I proceeded farther , and told him ; Sir , I could giue you reasonable good counsell , if you would bee willing to accept of it . He intreated me to giue it him , and that finding it to be such , he should be very thankefull vnto me for it .

My aduice then vnto him , was ; That since he went laden with that , which as yet he had no great need of , nor would it much import him , if he had , that he should rid himselfe of it , and haue recourse to that , which might be more necessary for him . Heere you carry a wardrop , or what else so euer it be , about you ; I would wish to sell it , and put it in your purse ; for besides that it will weigh lesse , you shall make your profit of the money you shall receiue for it .

The yong Youth discreetiy replyde , ( for your Toledanos haue passing good wits : ) This aduice of yours I like well , and would follow it ; but I hold it impertinent for the present . And Consejo , sin remedio , es cuerpo sin alma . Counsell , without a cure , is a body , without a Soule . What doth it import me to sell Prou●…b . it , if I want a Chapman to buy it ? I haue no occasion to goe into any Town , either to truck for it , or to sell it , and no body will buy it of mee , that does not know me .

Then I demanded of him ; what pieces they were that hee had in his packe ? He told , they were certaine cloathes for change , when he was minded to ●…hift those others that hee had on his backe . I askt him of the colour , and whether it had beene much worne ? He answered mee , that it was a mingled colour , and reasonable good . This pleas'd me better and better , I could not dislike of it : Therevpon , I offred him present paiment , if the cloathes did fit me .

The Youth beganne to looke sadly vpon me , as one that had beene strooke into a muze , and fell to eye me from top to toe ; for all that I had on my back , was not worth so much thred as would serue to binde vp a farthing-worth of Saffron , it was not worth one poore small Comin-seed , and yet I should haue the face to offer him money for his cloathes .

This imagination was mine owne ; and it may be , it entred into his conceit , that I was a little young thiefe , and that I would put some tricke or other vpon him . For he stood in suspence , consulting with himselfe , whether hee were best to shew them vnto me , or no ? For hee knew not how to trust me . And my fashion was then such , that he could not hope , nor surmize , that any good thing should come from me . So much difference is there betweene good and bad cloathes , that it giues either a good or a badde presumption of a mans person , according to that old Adage ; Qual te hallo , tal te juzgo . As I find you , so I take you . For where knowledge doth not informe , there the habit doth qualifie . But this Prouerbe is oft checkt : Que debaxo ●…e mala capa , 〈◊〉 ●…uer buen v●…dor . Vnder a thred-bare cloake , lyes many times much learning . And beggerly bottles oftentimes hold rich Wines . I did presently Prou. apprehend his thought , as if I had been within him ; And that I might reduce him to a better opinion of me , and alter his conceit , I said vnto him ; My pretty little Youth , I would haue you know , that I am as good a man as your selfe , and euery way as well borne , though I haue forborne till now to giue you account what I am ; but because thou mayst lay aside all feares and iealousies , I am now minded thou shalt haue it . My natiue soyle is Burgos ; there was I borne , and thence did I set forth , ( as thou doest now , ) reasonable well acoutred . I haue already done that , which I now aduise thee vnto : I sold my cloathes , as hauing then no need of them , and with that money which I had for them , together with that which I brought from home , I will buy me other , when I shall come , where I haue occasion to vse them . And by being carefull in looking well to my money , ( hiding it in some secret place about me , ) and by trauelling vpon the way in these totter'd ragges , ( which I now haue on ) I secure my life , and passe freely to and fro .

For no man will set vpon him that is poore . Hee liues safely , and dwels A poore man li●…es secure from harme . in places vn-peopled , and dis-inhabited , without any feare at all of theeues that should come to robbe him , or murderers to assault him on the way , and take his life from him . If therefore you haue any minde to it , sell mee what you haue no need of , and doubt not my paiment , for I am well able to doe it . I am neere to Toledo , whither I am bound ; I would gladly goe in a little handsomer , and not in this base and vile habit that I haue now about mee . The Youth vndid his Fardle , takes me out a Cloake , a payre of Breeches , a Cassocke , two Shirts , and a paire of Silke Stockins , all as fit for me , as if they had been made of purpose for me .

I agreed with him for a hundred Royals , nor were they worth any more ; for although the cloathes were well vs'd , and little worne , yet the cloth was none of the finest . I ript open the one side of my bundle , and tooke out thence as many Q●…rtes as seru'd the turne ; which gaue him no small trouble , when he perceiu'd the basenesse of the money ; for though it went against his stomake to beare any more burthens , yet he could by no meanes excuse it . But he comforted himselfe with this , that it was lighter then the other , and more vse full vpon all occasions . The bargaine ended , we shooke hands , and parted . He went to seeke his fortune , I know not whither . And I that night , though late , entred Toledo .

CHAPTER VIII .

How Guzman de Alfarache , cloathing himselfe like a Gallant in Toledo , makes loue to certaine Gentle-women : He telleth how things past with them , and how there , and in Malagon they scorned him ; He discourseth of youthfull iollity , and of the craft and subtil●…y of your Spanish women ; which may serue for an Instruction , and warning to all yong men .

IT is a common saying ; Q●… aunque vistan a la mona de seda , mona se queda . An Ape , though he bee cladde in gold , will Prou. be an Ape still . And this is so infallibly true , that it admitteth no exception . A man may easily alter his Habit , but hardly change his euill conditions . Hee may intertaine and deceiue folkes with his cloathes , though hee himselfe be starke naked , and stript of all goodnesse . I will presently turne Gallant , and as soone returne againe to my old trade ; bee a Gentleman to day to morrow a Porter . For , hee that knowes not how to liue by the sweat of his b●…owes , must quickly fall into pouerty , as you shall see in the sequell of this Story .

The first thing that I did the next morning , was the altring of my Doublet , my Shooes , and my Hat ; I tooke off that Taffata , that was on the Cape of my Guzman comes to Toledo , and puts himselfe into handsome apparel Cloake , and put on other of another colour ; I clapt new buttons vpon my Ca●…sock ; I tooke off the sleeues that were of Cloth , and in their stead set to others , that were of Silke : so that with a little cost , I had quite altred the fashion of those cloathes I had lately bought ; fearing lest for my sinnes-sake , or by some other mis-fortune , I might be taken in some trap , and so come to pay both for this , and the last yeeres reckning . For if ( by chance ) this young Youths friends should send after him , and make inquiry for him , and should hap to light vpon me , and finde his cloathes on my backe , they would presently suspect , that I had kill'd him to get his cloathes , and so demand their lost child of me , and driue me to giue them an account , what was become of him .

When I had fitted my selfe to my minde , I walked vp and downe the City some two dayes together , making inquiry , where , or in what place were any Companies of Souldiers , that were to goe vpon seruice , but could not of any heare any certaine newes . Thus I went beating the ayre , as one that was idle , and had nothing else to doe .

And as I past by Socodouer is the great Market-place in Toledo . Compounded of Saca , that is a place ; and dequeuir , which signifies , great ; which put together , makes Sacadqueuir , and by corruption Socodouer . Diego de Vrrea saith , it comes from Sacud de va●…r . A word compounded of Scicun , which is , a place ; and of the Verbe Saca , which is to draw ▪ & from deuair , which signifieth all kind of sou●…efooted Beasts for burthen . So that Socodouer , is as it were a place , where beasts are broug●…t laden with ●…ctuals , and other prouision , to sell in the open Market . Couarrunias . Socodouer , ( which I crost but seldome , and that with feare : and if I went out of my lodging , it was against my will , and that late , not sleeping three nights in one place , lest , if any man should chance to know me , I might be apprehended and carried to prison : ) it was my hap to see a Gentleman , mounted on a Mule , to crosse the way , going ( as it should seeme ) to the Court , so handsomely clad , and so well suted , that I did enuy his gallantry . His breeches were of Murry Veluet , cut with some-what a long , but delicate fine cut , drawne out vpon Cloth of Siluer : His doublet of Cloth of Gold , vpon which he had a Buffe Ierkin , laid on with a costly Milane-Lace , some three fingers broad . Hee had a braue Hat , answerable to the rest , imbroidered about the brimmes , and well set forth with it's Feather , and was not a little graced by the Hat-band , which was set thicke with Gold-Buttons , inammeled with blacke .

This Gentleman rode b b A man is said to be en Cuerpo , when he goes without a cloake , being in his bare Hose and D●… . Guzmans vaine and idl●… humour . en cuerpo , in his Hose and Doublet . But in his Port-Manteau he had a Cloake , which ( if I be not deceiued ) was of Rash , or else of fine Cloth , oflike colour to his Hose , rounded about , with a broad Parchment Gold Lace , sutable to that of his Ierkin . These good cloathes of his set an edge on my appetite . And seeing I had not got my money by Thrashing , but came by it so easily , it began to laugh and tighie in my purse , it geered and it fleered , and ( like a little yong Diuell ) went gingle , gingle , gingle .

When I saw my purse was set vpon this merry pin , I could hold no longer for my heart , but brake presently with him , and told him in good earnest , If you haue a minde to dance , I shall not sticke to pype vnto you : And if you will not leade on merrily of your owne accord , I shall be as loth to keepe you any longer company . And therefore I would wish you to accomplish this my desire , satisfying mee herein , and that quickly , without any farther delay .

Heerevpon I went forth-with to a Merchants shop , bought all things fitting , called a Taylor vnto me , and caused him to cut out my cloathes , who made such good haste , that he was ( as the phrase is ) ni oydo , ni visto ; neither heard , nor seene . It was finished in a trice , before any words were made of it , or any eye had seene it . For in three dayes , he brought it me home , and put it on my backe ; being iust the same with the other , and as like , as like could be , all saue the Buffe Ierkin , which because I could not meet with a good one according to my minde , I made me one of Murrey Sattin , trimm'd with trensi●…s of Gold . My Garters were of Straw-colour , fringed about with Gold Lace , and purled with Spangles . So that now I did scarce know my selfe ; I was growne so fine on the sudden ; all was in very good order , and my selfe not a little proud of it .

Now I had no more to doe , but to set a good face on the matter : and to say the truth , for a good face ; when I was a Boy , there were few that had a better . For I was very well-fauour'd , my eye quicke , and my countenance throughout very pleasing . When I saw what a gallant Souldier I was growne , I did proudly iet it about the streets of Toledo , in a very good Equipage , as if I had beene the sonne of some principall Man of note . I likewise entertained to attend on my person , a pretie handsome Page , and well clad ; and I fell into acquaintance with one that was well skill'd in the fashions of that Countrie , and spake excellent language .

I conceited then with my selfe ( seeing my selfe thus inthronized , and so well accoutred ) that my Father was aliue againe , and that I was restored to those prosperous times , wherein I was borne : I thought my selfe the happiest man in the world , and tooke such delight in my gay clothes , that a nights I was loth to put them off , and a daies , I left no street vntrodden , to the end that all might see me ; though I would not , that any should know me . I got me vp betimes one Sunday morning , put on a proud and stately gate , and in all this my gallantrie stept me with a iolly presence into the Cathedrall Church , for to heare Masse , though ( let me whisper it in your eare ) I went thither more ( I feare me ) for ostentation , then deuotion ; not so much to heare , as to be seene . I walkt round about the Church some three or foure times at least ; I visited the Chappels , ( which were most resorted vnto ) till at last I came betweene the two Quires , where I staid : There I saw many Ladies and Gentlewomen , and a great many of Gallants . But I did strut and The Spaniard hath naturally a proud kinde of gate . set forth my selfe , as if I had beene the only Cocke of the game , and all the rest Crauens ; none of their combes nor feathers were so goodly ( me thought ) as mine owne . I did put them downe all for a braue suit of clothes . And like a bonny-Shepheard , made show of all the whole fleece , as one that was very willing , that they should take a generall suruey both of my person , and Apparell , not debarring their eies of those lesser obiects , as my girdle , garters , and shoo-ties , which were all del Tudesco , curious and delicate worke , right Flanders .

I stretcht forth my necke , bore out my brest , stood stiffe vpon my legs , aduancing one while this , and then that other foot ; carrying my selfe in that vaine and idle fashion , that euery one at last had found me out , and obseruing the strangenesse of my looks my Mimick gestures , and often change of Postures , they began to iest and scoffe at my folly . But as long as they lookt vpon me , I ne're lookt into that ; nor did I so much as once perceiue , that my faults were the strings whereon their laughter plaid . But I rather thought with my selfe , that they did admire my curiositie , and my gallantrie .

And this is all , that offers it selfe to be spoken of concerning the men . But a prettie accident hapned vnto me amongst the women , not vnworthy such fooles as my selfe ; and this it was : Two amongst the rest were present there at that time , one of the which ( being borne in that Citie , and of extraordinarie beautie ) fixed her eies vpon my person , ( or to speake more truly ) vpon my purse ; perswading her selfe , that I that had such good clothes , could not choose but haue good store of money . But for the present , I tooke no notice of that , nor did I care to cast an eye towards her , because I had swallowed the others baite , that sate on the other side . Who hauing made ( as children vse to doe ) some signes vnto her with my finger , smild vpon me , and cast a kinde of Guzman caught with a looke , and a smile . slie looke towards me . I thought that was enough , and that the goale was already gotten . I perseuered in my ignorance , and she in her cunning carriage , till that going out of the Church , she went home to her house , and I after her , walking leisurely along . I ventur'd vpon her , and falling into discourse with her , vented some of my fooleries : But she , ( as if she had beene made of stone ) answered me not a word , nor risented nothing that I said vnto her : yet for all this she did not sticke now and then to turne her head aside towards me , and to discouer her face vnto me , which was the fire , that did burne me aliue . At last we come to a street , neere vnto the a a Solana , Corredor de Sol. Solarium . Verb : Solana . Couan ●…uias Solana of St. Cyprian , where shee dwelt . And as she entred into her house , it seemed ( stooping to goe in ) that shee made me a kinde of reuerence and courtsie with her head ; and me thought hereies laughed as it were vpon me , and her countenance shewd it selfe very cheerefull . With this ( for this time ) I left her , and returned backe to my lodging the same way I came . But I had not gone many steps , but it was my hap to spie a young Wench that had taken vp her standing at the corner of the street , who had wrapt her selfe vp so close in her Mantle , that you could scarce perceiue the eyes of her . This Wench had dogg'd me , and putting The cunning of your Spanis●… women . only forth those her two lesser fingers of her faire hand , with them and her head , she call'd and beckned me vnto her . I came vnto her , to know what she would be pleased to command me . Who made a long discourse vnto me , telling me that she was seruant to such a married Gentlewoman , a woman of very good fashion , and principall qualitie , to whom I was much obliged , and could not out of noblenesse , but thinke my selfe much bound vnto her , for the extraordinarie loue which she bare vnto me .

And therefore , as well in regard of this her good affection towards my selfe , as also in respect of her owne condition , ( being so great and so worthy ) and the strength of her Alliance and Kindred , which were men of no meane power and estimation in those parts ; that I would be pleased to acquaint her where I lodged , because she had some earnest businesse to treat with me , and must needs speake with me , for it did much concerne her so to doe . I was so taken with this , that I had much adoe ( as they say ) to keepe my selfe from leaping out of mine owne skinne ; nor would I haue chang'd this good fortune of mine , with the best that euer befell Alexander the Great : Soothing and flattering my selfe with this vaine conceit , that all the Ladies and Gentlewomen in the Towne were falne in loue with me , and now began to striue who should inioy me first .

To this her message , I returned a very graue & demure answer , with a gratefull acknowledgement of this her offred ( though vndeserued ) fauour , which when she shall be pleased to make me worthie thereof , I shall thinke my selfe not only the most graced , but the most fortunate , and happiest man in the world . In this conuersation , by little and little , we draw neere to my Lodging . She tooke notice of it , and leaue being taken each of other , I get me in to dinner , for it was more then time .

Now , for that I knew not what this Gentlewoman was , and had neuer seene her heretofore ( to my knowledge ) my longing was not so great to looke after her , as was my desire to see this other . I thought euery houre a thousand yeere , till I might come to see her againe ; Time ( me thought ) was too slow of wing , his Glasse did not runne fast enough , his Sithe did not sweepe away the loytring houres halfe so speedily , as I could haue wished . Yet at last I hie me to the street where she dwelt , bestowing there more turnes , and circling more rounds about her house , then a Mill-horse , or a Mule that drawes in an a a Anoria , is an engine that goes with wheeles , to draw water out of a Well . Some would haue it to come from Anno , a yeere . For as the Sunne passing thorow the twelue Signes , causeth the yeere , and brings it abo●…t anew : So that Wheele , when it is downe at the l●…est , comes about abo●…t . Some say it is compounded ded of am , circum ; and haurio , taking vp the water as it turnes about . Others , of 〈◊〉 , sursum and 〈◊〉 , fluo , because it causeth the water below , to come vp . Others from the w●…rd Annuere , To incline . Others , from 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 Reftauro , restituo , renouo . Because when they are emptie , they come to be fill'd afresh . Others of the word , 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 , Haustoria , which signifieth Anoria , quasi Antloria . Of the Verbe Antlo , antlas . Diego de Vrrea saies , it is an Arabicke word , of the Verbe Neuare , to goe round , making a noise , as Anoria doth . Padre Guadix , that it is called Noria , from Naaura , which is as much as a wheel●…g , or turning about . Couarru . Anoria ; yet at last , when it grew somewhat late , and the day shut vp , she came forth ( as by stealth ) to talke with me from her window . Then did we enter discourse , and exchang'd many words ; at last she told me , that I must needs that night come and sup with her . I commanded my seruant to prouide me a good fat Capon , a brace of Partridge , a baked Conie , a bottle of the Wine b b Vino del Santo , a rich kinds of ●…ine , as famous about Toledo ; as that of Ayon Na●…tueil in France . del Santo , and as good bread as could be got for money , fruits and other the like things for the latter course , and that he should make haste , and bring them away with him .

Afcer that the night was well in , thinking it was now high time , I went to the place appointed , where I was kindly receiued , and entertained with all the kindenesse and courtesie that could be deuised . It was now a fit houre for supper , and therefore intreated her , that she would command the Table to be couered . But she finding out fresh matter to worke vpon , and spending the time in new entertainements , spunne out the thred still longer and longer , adding one delay to another ; I maruail'd a God what she meant by it ; I knew not in the world what to make of it .

At last , whilest I was musing vpon it , she puts me into a Labyrinth , beginning to tell me that she was a Virgin , her descent Noble , her condition and qualitie , of those of the best ranke , and that she had a brother , an vnruly young fellow , ill gouern'd , and worse-condition'd , subiect to swaggering , and to quarrelling ; a kinde of roaring-Boy ; one that neuer came within doores , vnlesse it were sometimes to his dinner or his supper , and all the rest both day and night , hee spent in play , and other youthfull pleasures .

Whilest we were in this deepe discourse , behold , one knocks aloud at the doore . Shee cries out , Ay me ! what shall I doe ? I am vndone , I am vndone . So much was she moued , so distractedly troubled with this feigned perturbation , so good a face did she set vpon this falshood , and did dissemble this her passion so handsomely , that she might haue therewith deceiued a wiser , and better experienced man then my selfe . And though this Gentlewoman knew very well , both the end and the meanes , whereby all this businesse was to bee carried , yet did she play her part so well , that she seemed to be mightily afflicted , as one that knew not which way to turne her selfe . And as if then presently that remedie had occurr'd vnto her , ( as a thing suddenly thought vpon ) she desired me of all loues to put my selfe for a while into a a a Tinaja , a large wide Vessell of earth , as big as a Tunne . Antonius drawes it's Etymologie from Tinea . Alio nomine , Dolium . In Spaine they vsually fill them with water , with Oyle ; with Wine , or the like . Tinaja , that had no water in it , yet was it not without some droppings , and a kinde of sliminesse hanging about the sides of it , and that none of the cleanest . This earthen Vessell stood in the outward Court vnder the Porch . I got in as well as I could , as willing to doe what she would haue me ; she claps a Lid ouer it , and when she had lo done , she returnes to her Estrado , shee was scarce set , but her brother comes in ; who seeing such a great smoake in the house , said vnto her ; Why how now sister , what meane you by this ? are you turn'd Gallant , and thinke to out-braue me with this smoake ? it is maruell you doe not let the raine drip in to driue mee hence . What haue wee to supper ? so much smoake must promise much good cheere . It is not I trow , a great deale of fire ( as they say ) and a little roast .

And as he went thus talking along , he entred into the Kitchen ; where he had no sooner seene our prouision , but he gets him out againe , saying ; Here 's braue doings indeed ; it is newes to see this , Sister . Which of vs two , I pray , is to be married this night ? How came this hither into the house , and when ? What curious banquet is this , or who the guests that are inuited vnto it ? Is this the confidence I haue had of you ? Is this the honour which I maintaine ? and this the reputation , that you giue to your Fathers house , and to me your vnfortunate brother ? I must know the truth of this businesse , or else it is like to be a blacke night . She excused her selfe vnto him , but how or which way , I cannot tell you ; for partly through feare , and partly because the T●…naja was couered , I could not well either heare or vnderstand more then the noise which her words sent forth . And in this chollericke humour of his , being much offended with her , he willed her to sit downe at boord . And when they had supt , he in his owne person went downe with a Candle , and fell to searching of the house , and had made fast the doore , that opened out into the street : And they two entring together into their priuat chambers , remained there within , and I without in the Tinaja . All this while I was very attentiue to whatsoeuer was said or done , and earnestly betooke my selfe to my deuotions , insomuch , that there was not any one prayer that I had learned all my life-time , that I did not tunne ouer and ouer , that God might blind his eyes , and that he might not see where I was .

And finding my selfe out of danger , lifting vp the couer , I thrust out my head a little to see whether my Mistresse were comming , or that I could heare her either cough , or spet , whether any Cat were stirring about the house , or any thing else whatsoeuer . Euery thing that mou'd , my minde still gaue mee that it should be she . But seeing that she staid so long away , and that the house w●…s wonderfull quiet , I leapt out of the belly of my Tinaja , like another Ionas out of the Whales , though not so cleane as I could wish .

But it was my good hap , that for feare of such mischances , which are wont to happen , especially to young-men , I had reserued my better cloathes for the day , making vse a nights of that old Sute , which I had bought before , so that the care I tooke was not great , and it did so much the lesse grieue me . I ranged round about the house , and went from lodging to lodging , till I came at last to her Chamber , where I beganne with my finger to scratch the doore , like a dogge ; and did the like vpon the floore , and all that she might heare me : but this deafe Adder , was of that euill condition , that she had stopt her eares .

In this kinde of language the night wore away , and the day beganne to appeare : which when I perceiued , inraged , afflicted , desperate , and ready to freeze for cold , opening the street doore , and pulling it after mee , I went forth ( like a foole as I was ) cursing and blaspheming , a a The Spanish 〈◊〉 , Echando mantas , y no de lano . Casting abroad C●…rless , but not of Wooll : i. vs●… hayry and ●…sh ●…ds , 〈◊〉 milde ●…d 〈◊〉 words , like wooll . fretting and fuming , and making crosses on the wall , with a purpose neuer to come there any more .

Musing vpon my mis-fortunes , I drew neere to mine owne lodging , finding not farre from thence a Cookes shop open , where I fill'd my belly with Pyes , such as are eaten by such Picaros and Rogues , as my selfe , which were to mee more sauoury , then any other . And with them , that rage , and wrathfull choller descended downe into my stomake , which stucke before in my throat , and was ready to choke me . My lodging was neere at hand , I called to my seruant , who ( waiting there for me ) opened the doore ; I came in , put off my cloathes , and got me to bed . But the remembrance of the wrong that I had receiued , would not suffer me to sleepe , nor to take any rest . One while I condemn'd my selfe , another while my Mistresse , and by fits would lay the blame vpon mine owne ill fortune .

And while I was debating these things with my selfe , it being now broad day , behold , one knockes at my Chamber doore , and it was the Maid that had dogg'd me the day before , and her Mistresse with her , who was no sooner come in , but she sets her selfe downe in a Chaire , close by my bed-side , and her This is an ordinarie fashion in Spaine . seruant that waited on her , sate vpon the ground neere vnto the doore . The Gentle-woman askt me along Story of my life ; Who I was ? what my busines ? and how long I stayd in Towne ? But the Diuell a word of truth , that she could get from my mouth . All that I told her , were arrant lyes ; for I was made of nothing else . And thinking to deceiue her , she caught me in the trap . I went satisfying of her demands , but fell short ( I know not how ) in that part of mine account , which concerned me most . For , whereas I should haue said , That I was to reside there some certaine moneths . I told her that I past as a Traueller , and was shortly to be gone . She , that she might not lose the aduantage of the Dice , and to shew what a poore gamester I was , in seeking after such tr●…sitorie sport , that was to last so little awhile , ( but a cast , and away ) made sure account , if I would but set out her hand liuely , to put a tricke vpon mee . And thereupon , she presently began to pitch the Hay , wherewith shee meant ●…o catch the Conie .

Thus resolued , she carelessely , ( or rather with a great , deale of carelesse care ) w●…nt discouering her brauery in her cloathes , which was neat and delicate , with rich abillir●…ts of Gold , withother things vnder her gowne , which was of Naples Grogram , choyser Silke all Italy was not able to afford .

And taking out certaine Beads of Corall out of her pocket , she made shew of playing with them in her hand , tossing them to and fro ; and within a little while after , she feigned that she mist a Relicke , which was fastened therevnto . She seemed to be much afflicted for the losse of it , saying , tha●… it was her husbands . And therewithall she suddenly rose vp , as if it did import her to goe backe againe presently to her owne house , that she might lose no time for the finding of it againe , if by chance she had there let it fall . And albeit I promised to giue her such another , and perswaded her all that I could , and made her large offers , I could not winne her to stay any longer .

Away she went , yet passing her word vnto me , that she would come again to visit me , and send her Maid backe againe vnto mee , as soone as shee came home , to aduise me , if she had found her lost Iewell . It made me very melancholly , and grieu'd me much , that she should in this fashion go away from me , for that ( as I told you before ) shee was maruellous beautifull , exceeding gallant , and wonderfull discreet . I had a great minde to sleepe , and settled my selfe to take some rest , but I could not continue it for aboue two houres . I had too many cares in my head to take any case , and therefore I arose , that I might thinke the better of them , when I was vp .

By that time I had made my selfe ready , dinner came in ; & while I was yet sitting at the table , her Maid entred the roome . Who ( being a witty Wench as she was ) intertain'd me till dinner was ended . And then she told me , that she was once more come back againe to see , whether her Mistris , playing there with her Rosario in her hand , had by chance let fall that piece ? Wee were all downe vpon our knees , to see if we could haue the good lucke to finde it ; but it could not be found , because it was neuer lost .

When we had giuen ouer looking , I complemented with her , and told her , that I did not grieue so much for the worth of the thing it selfe , as for her sake , whose it was .

Then did she figure forth vnto me the bignesse , the proportion , and the true fashion of it , obliging mee with good words , to buy her such another ; promising , that her Mistresse should not fayle to be with me the next day following betimes , making some faire excuse ( the better to colour the businesse , ) to goe on Pilgrimage to our Ladyes Shrine , or some other the like Visit.

Vpon this I went along with her to the Gold-smithes , and bought her a dainty fine little golden booke , curiously wrought , which her Maid had made Many l●…e Ma●… . ●…hes are ●…de 〈◊〉 Spaine , vnder these holy pretences . choyse of ; and it may be she had her direction from her Mistresse , as hauing had her sight of this pretty toy but lately before . Howsoeuer I am sure they went cleane away with it , for 〈◊〉 could neuer after see either Mistresse , or Maid .

Now was it about three in the afternoone , and I had not yet digested the bread that lay in my stomake ; I was ready to dye out of a longing desire that I had to know the occasion , and to search out the true reason of the last nights passage , and whether it were a matter of earnest , or a tricke put vpon mee ? And so putting this affront out of minde , as if there had neuer beene a●…y such matter , I returned to former walke : Where I found my Mistresse looking very heauily on the matter , her countenance was s●…d and mela●…ly ; and making shew , as if she had stayd there for me , sh●… bec●…ed vnto mee with her hand to come vnto her , putting her fore ●…riger vpon her mouth , and casting her eye behinde he●… , ( as if she were as●…ayd left some body should watch her , ) she drew neere vnto the doore , and v●…spered s●…tly v●…o 〈◊〉 , that I should goe gently on a sore to the great Church , and so I did . She takes her Mantle , and hastens after me , meeting both , as it were ●…t one instant 〈◊〉 the two Quires ; and she passing quite through them , went dire●…y out of the Church , into the Calle de la a a They haue an old Tale in Spaine ; That the men , to keepe their wiues from gadding abroad , did perswade them to vse Chapines , that they might seeme as tall & handsome as the men , and they made them of a very heauy kinde of wood . They made vse of this inuention of their Husbands , but made them at first hollow within , and afterwards of Corke , to lighten the loade , & that they might be able to walke more nimbly . Couarruuias verb. Chapin . Chapineria , the street where all your womens Chapines are sold ; and smiling vpon me , and intising mee vnto her , with a louely cast of her eye , she seemed to wish me to follow her . I made after her ; she entred into a Merchants shop , in the b b Alcana : A knowne street in Toledo , where all your Mercers dwell . Of the Hebrew word Chana , to buy . Guadix sayes it is an Arabick word , of alquina , which signifies Gaine . Couarruuias . Alcana , and I with her . There she gaue me satisfaction , vowing with a thousand oathes , that it was no fault of hers , and that she had no hand in that businesse . Shee fill'd my head with this winde : I beleeued her well-composed lyes , shee promised this next night to make me amends ; and though she were sure to lose her life , she would not spare it , to giue me content . She made me so plyable , that shee might now worke me like Waxe . She bought some things , which came to about some hundred and fifty Royals ; and when she was to pay for it , shee said vnto the Mercer ; What shall I pay you weekely till this debt be out ? Hee answered , Mistris , see Ware , see Money . I doe not vse to part with my Wares at this price , nor doe I sell vpon trust . If you deliuer me my money , you may carry away what you haue bought ; if not , I must intreat you to pardon me .

Then I told him , Sir , This Gentle-woman is disposed to iest with you , for she has money sufficient to satisfie for a greater matter then this . I am her Purse-bearer , and the Steward of her house . So taking some Crownes out of my pocket , for to shew my greatnesse the more , I freed my selfe from basenesse , and her from her debt : Apprehending then at that instant , that this was but a stratagem of hers , to be paid before-hand , and that shee might not be mockt withall , as it often befalleth many women ; nor did I repent mee of what I had done ; it seeming vnto me , that by my faire proceeding , I had bound her vnto me . Nor would I haue giuen my two imploiments of that one day , in the pursuite of these two Dames , for all the wealth of Mexico , and Peru. So I askt her , whether she would keepe true touch with me or no ? And whether I might take sure hold of her promise ? And at what houre I should come ? She assur'd me that I might , and for the houre , she would not faile mee at ten in the night . She went home to her house , and I to intertaine the time abroad ; Thinking with my selfe , that I had seazed on two preyes at one flight , and tooke two Troutes at one stroke .

At the houre appointed , I put on my old disguise , and got mee to the Mill againe . I gaue the signe agreed vpon betweene vs , which was , to strike certain strokes , with a stone vnderneath her window . But it was all one , as if I had bestow'd those blowes vpon the Bridge of c c Alcantara : A Bridge so called in Toledo . In the yeere 1258. a great part of it was carried away with a Flood ; but the yeere following , it was repaired and new built . Alcantara .

I conceiued with my selfe , that the houre was not yet come , or that it was little more then ten of the clocke , which made mee dance attendance a little longer . And so houre after houre , I stayd waiting there , till it was twelue of the night , now and then making the wonted signes .

But what should a man spend his time in talking to Saint Iuan de los Reyes , being it is a Statua of Stone ? It was but lost labour , a wearying out of my selfe in vaine , and a meere mockery . For he , whom shee termed her brother , was her Gallant , and her Sweet-hart : and did maintaine themselues by these kinde of cheating tricks , and consorted both together in all that they did .

They were of d d Cordoua , is a Noble and famous Citie in Andaluzia . Cordoua , proper in their persons , and well accommodated ; and amongst other yong Thrushes , that they had brought into the Net , was a young Scriuener , but newly married , who being whetted on by this Gentlewoman , and tolled on by such traines as she had cunningly laid for him , had giuen her certaine Iewels ; and as she dealt with me , so did she lead him along with delayes , making him to wait vpon her pleasure , putting him to fine after fine to purchase his desire . But when he found all was coozenage and Roguery , he resolued to be reuenged on her .

That night I was quite tyred out with a tedious expectation , ( as you haue already heard . ) And when I was about to goe my way , ●…o , I might discerne a great troope of people making towards mee , and supposing it to bee the Iustice , I got me a little aside . At last I perceiued , that they knockt at that doore ; I returned backe , drawing neerer and neerer , a little and a little , to see what all this company did seeke for . And one of the Alguazils ( telling them within who they were ) caused the doore to bee opened . When they were all gone in , I got me to the doore , that I might the better vnderstand how all things passed . The Alguazil searched all the house ouer & ouer , but could not finde that he came for . I was about to call vnto them , to looke into the Tinaja , and to haue betooke me to my heeles when I had done . But the Scriuener presently tooke that taske vpon him , and saued me a labour , and had a care that no corner should be left vnsearcht .

But , as these things cannot be carried so close , but that they will soone be brought to light , if they be well followed , one by chance lighted vpon a single hand Cuffe that lay vpon the ground , which at the time of the hiding of her brothers clothes , was let fall and left behinde out of haste ; and because this was a businesse vndertaken for a friend , and euery one was willing to doe his best , one of the Alguazils said , This Cuffe must haue a Master , who euer it bee .

The Gentlewoman would faine haue salu'd vp this matter : but hauing prickt the Hare , these Hounds began to take a little more paines , and to hunt with more metall , in hope to haue their game . And one of the Alguazils , seeing a great Coffer there , which ( as he thought ) might very well containe a man , commanded it to be opened : where they found my Gallant . Whereupon , they were both will'd to put on their cloathes , and to make themselues readie ; which done , they were both for companie carried to prison together . I was both contented therewith and ashamed . Contented , that it was my good hap not to be found there ; and ashamed that she had gull'd me , and made a foole of me . All the remainder of that night , I could not sleepe one winke , for , thinking partly on this , and partly on that other Gentlewoman , vpon whom , I thought to make my selfe whole , I did conceit with my selfe , that she was a woman of another kinde of qualitie , and of a differing fashion from the former .

All that day I staid waiting for her , but she did not so much as send me any message by her maid , nor did I know where she liu'd , nor what she was . You see here how well I imploi'd my paines , and my Purse vpon these two , and whether it had not beene better for me to haue laid out my money in the buying of some fiftie young Lambes of a yeere old . I was now growne desperate , and for my greater comfort amidst these my troubles , at night when I came to my lodging , I met with an Alguazil there , a stranger , making inquirie for I know not what person . Now by this time you may imagine , in what poore case I tooke my selfe to be , and how the world was like to goe with me . I will'd my seruant to tell him , that if he had any thing to say to me , he should be sure to finde me there the next morning .

In the meane-while I walked out by the Gate a a A gate so called in Toledo , because the entrance thereinto , is hard and difficult , it is an Arabicke word , and signifies a thorny place , and full of bushes . Couarru . del Cambron , where musing , and walking , I continued almost till it was day , framing Discourses to my selfe , what , or whom it should be , that this Alguazill sought for . But when the morning was come , I thought it a safe houre to goe home , with purpose to change both my apparell and my Lodging .

But by this time , my care was secur'd ; for I was not he that he looked for , as I afterwards vnderstood . I went forth to the Place of Socodouer , where I heard two Mules cri'd for to goe for b b Almagro , a principall Towne belonging to the Order de Calatraua . Padre Guadix would haue it come from Alma-agua , and of agro . Because those waters there-abouts haue a sowre taste , though they be wholsome . Others from the colour of the soyle , which is red . Vide Couarru . Verb. Almagre . Almagro ; I was slower in the hearing , then the agreeing for them , or in my departing from Toledo . For euery thing there me thought smelt of Broome , and the soles of old shooes . That night I reached to c c A Towne in the Kingdome of Toledo , intitled with a Condeship . Tierra vmbrosa . Guzman leaues Toledo . Orgaz the next to Malagon . But being not able , out of the feare I had taken those nights before , to take any rest , I came thither so drowzy , and so sleepy , that I was not able to hold vp my head : But another new occasion did awaken me , and made me to rowze vp my spirits ; which was ; That as soone as I was entred into my Lodging , there came to take charge of my clothes , and such other things as I brought in with me , a young Wench , seeming to be something more then a seruant , and yet some-what lesse then a daughter ; She had a good face of her owne , a hansome feature , a pleasant behauiour , and had both wit and tongue at will . Which sort of creatures , ( to draw both custome and credit to such kinde of houses ) your honest Inne-holders will be sure to lay wait for , and seldome or neuer shall you see them vnprouided of such pretty Commodities to welcome , and cheere vp their Guests . I talkt to her , and she answered mee ; I could not spurre her that question , whereunto she did not kicke me an answer . One discourse drew on another , and we continued our conuersation so farre forth , A pleasant iest , that past betw●…t Guzman and a pretie Wench at the Inne in Malagon . that she consented vnto me , and had peremptorily giuen me her promise , that she would come and passe away the time with me , when her Master and Mistresse were gone to bed and asleepe . She couered the boord ; I gaue her the brawne of the Capon . I dranke a Health to her , and shee did pledge me ; I would haue held her fast by the arme ; she flies off ; I seeking to catch hold of her , and she to get away from me : reaching at her , I fell downe vpon th' one side to the ground . The Chaire was of Wood , and had some turn'd pieces in it rib-wise , it tooke me iust athwart the midst of my body ; whereby I receiued a shrewd blow . And it was a faire gift of God , that it was not farre worse ; for if the Dagger that I had at my backe , had by chance falne out of the sheathe , and pitcht with the Pommell on the ground , and the point haue beene vpward , and had lighted betweene one of those barres or ribbs in the Chaire , a thousand pound to a pennie , but that I had beene slaine out-right in the place ; and so there being an end of me , my Creditours had beene paid . When I was vp , and all was well , I put the question againe vnto her , whether I should depend vpon her comming ? She told me I should see , whether she meant to faile me or no ? Vttering some other idle foolish speeches , and so went her waies .

You haue heard already how ill I past those nights before ; which made me now so heauy-headed , that it was impossible , that I should any longer beare vp , and abstaine from sleeping . But I was desirous to rise betimes , whether I slept or no. And therefore I will'd my seruants , that they should get them straw and Barley , so much as our Mules were to be allowed the next morning , and that they should bring it , and put it in the chamber where I lay . Which being done , hauing set it neere vnto the doore , they pull'd it after them , & leauing it vnshut , they went to bed . And albeit sleep would faine haue seazed vpon me , yet my desire kept me waking ; but not being able to hold out any longer , I was forced to yeeld my selfe vnder the arrest of Morpheus his Mace , in whose silken bands I was fast , though softly bound .

About mid-night a little she-Asse had slipt her halter in the Stable , and got loose ( if she were not left loose before , as I verily perswade my selfe it was mine Hosts , and went about the house to seeke her Prouant ; ) This Asse came to my lodging , and hauing smelt out the Barley , the little foole thrust in her head , thinking to haue met with a good mouth-full , and in pressing to come where the Prouender was in the Sieue , she wagged , and wagg'd , this way , and that way , and striuing to get in , the doore began to creake , I that was mindfull of the businesse , a little thing would suffice to reuiue my remembrance : And now I was fully perswaded , that I had the Bulls sure enough in the Place , and that they could by no meanes get from me . And because I was all this while very sleepie , and scarce halfe awake , I imagined with my selfe , that she could not finde the way to the bed , whereupon I raised my selfe , and sitting vp in my bed , I call'd her vnto me . When the Asse heard my voice , she was afraid ; and stood still , saue only that she did put one of her fore-feet in the fraile wherein the straw was . I thinking that it was the Wench , and that she had stumbled by chance vpon it , leapt out of my bed , and said vnto her , Come hither , my Loue , come to bed , giue me thy hand . And because she should reach me , I stretcht out my body at large vnto her , and lifting vp my legge , I hit her with my knee on the snout ; with that shee lifted vp her head , and smote me such a blow with hers on the noddle , that she almost set me on my breech ; so much was I astonied therewith . And when she had done , she fled away from me , as fast as her legges would giue her leaue . For if she had staid , I should haue had much adoe ( considering the paine I was in ) to haue forborne to thrust my Dagger vp to the hilts in her guttes .

I bled mainly , both at mouth and nose ; and cursing Loue , and all his cunning tricks to the pit of hell ; I knew , that all this hapned deseruedly vnto me ; because , being a wilde simple Ladde as I was , I was so easie of beliefe . But I quickly made fast my doore , and got me to bed .

CHAP. IX .

How Guzman de Alfarache lists himselfe for a Soldier . Hee telleth , whence that ill phrase grew . En Malagon , en cada casa vn ladron ; y en lo del Alcalde , hijo y padre . In Malagon , euery house a thiefe ; And in that of the Alcalde two : The father and the sonne . How in a short time , through ill gouernment , all Guzmans money is gone ; How to his griefe he is forced to serue a Captaine . Some lessons are giuen to young men . To these are added the faults of bad Ministers in matters of war-fare .

AS if Loue had not beene a desire of Immortalitie , bred in an idle minde ; without any beginning of Reason , without any subiection to Law , which is entertained by the Will ; but with it , cannot not be put off ; easie in it's entrance to the heart , but hard to be thrust out againe ; I began to sweare , that I would neuer more follow his colours , nor be of his Company . But I was asleepe when I made this protestation , and knew not what I said . My sleepinesse was so great then at that time , that all my paine could not keepe me waking .

Which drowzinesse of mine was the cause , that I could not rise so early as I thought , but kept my bed till nine of the clocke that morning . At which houre comes me in this my ●…iddle-faddle of the Inne , to giue me satisfaction , vowing and swearing vnto me , that she lay within her Master and Mistris , and that they had shut her vp , and kept the key themselues , that she could by no meanes get forth : Though for mine owne part , I did verily beleeue , that she did purposely play the Wag with me , and had neuer any such meaning , but did lie in all that she said . Whereupon I told her ; O friend Luçia , your loue hath done me a great deale of hurt : it began in the Chaire , and ended in the saddle . I shall looke hereafter a little better to your water . Take me with that fault againe , and I will giue you leaue to hang me . Goe about your businesse , goe , I haue no more to say to you . Make haste , and bring in break-fast , for I will presently be gone . So she rosted vs out of hand a brace of Partridge , serued in with a slice or two of Bacon , which serued both for our breake-fast , and our dinner , because the day was farre spent , and our iourney but short .

Well , I was now vpon going , my Mules were ready , and staid for my comming . The a a The Spanish word , is Mo●…na . To wit , a Mule that is begotten of an Horse , and a she Asse , commonly with a blacke Muzzle , a sw●…ling nostrill , and hauing ●…sh trick●… . Mule that I rode on , was an ill-condition'd Iade , and somewhat skittish . When I was readie to put foot in the stirrop , I got me vp vpon a bench , thinking from thence to get with the greater ease into my Saddle ; but by her going backe , she seemed to tell me , that I should not doe it so easily as I thought ; or else her meaning was , that I should quickly get mee thence , or else shee would set mee going with a witnesse . And because she could not speake my language , that she might make me vnderstand her by signes , ierking out her hinder legges , she flings me out her heeles , and doubling her fyles , with two kicks , that she made at me , she threw mee a good wayes from her : But she did me no harme , for I recouered my selfe by and by , and got vp vpon my legges . After this , I was a little more wary , and tooke better heed . And with a-loud voice I beganne to cry out : There is not any female ( I thinke ) in this Inne , euen to the very Mules , which hath not her iadish tricks .

Well , I was seated in my Saddle , and my Mule was quiet , and being vpon the way , ( seeing what mis-fortunes I had suffered ) I acquainted my seruants what had hapned vnto me , with the Asse that came into my Chamber . They laught exceedingly , as if they would haue burst their hearts , and the more , at my weake and childish vnderstanding , that I would giue credit to a Wench in an Inne , who are neuer good , but at their first comming , and euer after proue arrant Iades , that a man can not tell how to trust to them .

We had now gone two long Leagues , and the Boy that went a-foote by vs to looke vnto our Mules , would needs drinke . I call'd , Bring hither the a a The Spanish word is , Bota : Quasi imbuta , of the Latine word , imbuo , de in and Bibo . It is made of a Goats-skinne , the mouth of it being Horne , with a stopple to it , and the sules strongly sowne & Rozend within , that it may n●…t leake . Your Trauellers on the way neuer goe without one , by reason the countrey is so hot , which causeth much thirst . Bottle , giue me the Bottle : but no Bottle appeares ; for wee had left it behinde vs . Peraduenture mine Hostesse ( said the Boy ) hath seazed vpon it , and laid it aside in waggery , because we might ride the lighter , or be paid for her care in keeping it safe for vs .

Nay ( quoth my Page ) I rather beleeue , that they amongst them haue stolne it from vs , for to adde more fame to this towne , that they may not lose that good name they haue gotten .

Then was I very desirous to know , how this bad report came first to bee raised , and whence it grew . And because they that vse to carry Merchandize from place to place , and trauell often on the way , and now and then heare diuers men discourse of such things as these ; I thought with my selfe , I were best to aske the reason of it of our Foot-man , imagining he ( if any man ) could best informe vs of it .

Therevpon I call'd vnto him , and said ; Friend Andres ; Since thou hast beene a piece of a Scholler , a Wane-man , and now a Moço de Mulas , one that Lackey'st along with Mules , and lookest vnto them , I prethee tell mee ( if happely thou hast heard of it ) how this Towne came to haue this ill name , and wherefore it is commonly said as a by-word , or by way of a Prouerbe in euery mans mouth : En Malagon , cn cada c●…sa , ay vn ladron : y●…n la del Alcalde , hijo , y padre . Euery house in Malagon hath a thiefe of his owne : And in A Spanish Prouerbe . that of the Alcalde , there are twaine ; the father , and the Sonne , both knaues in graine .

The Muleter made answere , saying , Sir , your Worship askes me of a thing , which I haue been told of diuers times , and that diuers wayes , euery one following his owne opinion : Which if I should recount them all vnto you , the way too is short & the Story too long , and the desire that I haue to drink , beyond them both . For I am so dry , that I am scarce able to speake a word . But be it as it may bee , I will doe my best to satisfie your longing . Laying that therefore aside , which hath no colour nor shadow of truth , and conforming my selfe according to the opinion of some , of whom I haue heard it ; vpon whose iudgement , I ground mine , as more agreeable vnto reason : For in that , for which we haue no naturall reason , nor by tradition left vnto vs in writing , when time shal haue buried these things , a good & a sound iudgment must be the Law , which we must obey , and where-vnto wee ought to conforme our selues . And so this had it's beginning , ( which is now long since , time out of minde ) in this manner , as I shall now deliuer vnto you .

In the yeere of our Lord , 1236. King Don Fernando , sur-named the Holy , The story concerning the occasion of this prouerbe , En Malagon &c. raigning in Castilla , and Leon , who gained Seuill , the second yeere after the death of King Don Alfonso his father , stayd one day at dinner in a a Benauente , is a towne in the Kingdome of Leon. There is a Land of that name . Benauente , where he receiued newes , that the Christians had entred the Citie of Cordoua ; and had made themselues Masters of the Towers and Castles belonging to the Suburbs , which they call b b Axarquia , the suburbs adioyning to Cordoua . Padre Guadix saies , it is so called , because it stands towards the East which is termed in the Arab●…ck tongue , Xarquia Axarquia , together with that gate and the wall . And for that the Moores were many , and the Christians few , they were driuen to great necessities for want of succour .

The like aduice was dispatcht by Post , to Don Aluar Perez de Castro , who was in c c Martos , a samous towne in Andaluzia , antiently called , Tucci , and Augusta Gemella . Couarruuias . Martos , and to Don Ordonno Aluarez , principall Gentlemen of Castile , men of great power and strength , and to many other persons , to giue them their best aide and assistance . Euery one of these , that had notice of it , presently raised Forces , and hasted thither with all the speed they could ; the King likewise marched forward on his way , without any delay , or protraction at all ; albeit , that this newes was brought vnto him , on the 28. of Ianuary , and that the season was very bad , and painefull to trauell , by reason of the great Snowes , and the extreme coldnesse of the weather . But nothing could hinder him from this his designe , for hee hasted away to their succour , leauing order that the rest of his Army should follow him , carrying no more along with him to attend his person , then a hundred Gentlemen of good quality .

The King had likewise giuen order to all Cities , Townes , & other places , that were able to afford ayde , to send their Souldiers to those Frontiers and Borders , whither he himselfe was to goe : Great store of raine fell , the Riuers and other Foords , by which they were to passe , were so mightily risen , that his men were not able to goe forward .

There met together at that time in Malagon a great multitude of Souldiers sent from diuers and sundry parts , beeing in number so many , that though that place were very well peopled , and of great receipt , being one of the best Townes in all that quarter ; yet in euery house there was lodged one Souldier at the least ; and in some , two , or three .

The Alcalde did lodge one of the Captaines of a Company , and a sonne of his , that he brought along with him , and was his d d Alferez , is he to whom the Captaine recommends his Ensigne , that he may gather his Company together , & bring them all to their rendeuous . The Captaine should cary the Ancient . But by reason of his diuers imployments , he substitutes one in his place , whom they call Alferez , who is subordinate vnto him & stirs notwithout his direction . And all that are vnder that Ensine are to sollow 〈◊〉 Colours . And therefore they haue this varietie of names , a●… Signiferos , Vexiliferos , Primipila●…ios , duces , &c. Couarruuias pag. 44. Alferez . Their prouision grew short , the wayes bad , there was no comming to Market ; so that for want of reliefe , euery one suffered necessitie , euery one was put to his shifts , and not a man amongst them , but sought to maintaine and preserue his life by filching and stealing , robbing heere and there ; whence , or from whom it made no matter all was one to them : Life was sweet : Let others hang and starue ; so as they had where-withall , all was well .

A conceited Clowne of that very Place , a shrewd witty fellow for a plaine Husband-man , departed thence , to goe to Toledo : And meeting in Orgaz with a braue troope of Gentlemen , they demanded of him , whence he was ? Hee answered ; Of Malagon . They further askt him , What 's the newes there ? He told them ; Gentlemen , all the newes in Malagon , is ; In euery house , a thiefe ; and in the Alcaldes , two ; the sonne , and the father .

And this was the true Originall of that false report , which men put vpon that Towne , as not knowing any other certaine ground , whence this brute should be raised ; and is now , in these our times , a notorious wrong done vnto them , as being a fault whereof they are not guilty , and yet are most vniustly charged therewith . For in all this way , that we haue come and gone , or whither so euer else it shall be your hap to trauell , I doubt me , you will hardly finde either better intertainment ( I meane for Innes ) or more ciuill and better behau'd people ( taking euery man according to his condition and breeding , ) then are in this towne . Yet , Sir , withall , I could likewise tell you , of many notable thefts , and very famous ones , that haue been committed in Malagon .

Whilst we were thus discoursing on the way to passe away the time , and make our iourney seeme the easier , I lighted on a Traueller , of whom I learn'd , That in Almagro , I should meet with a Company of Souldiers . Whereof hauing throughly inform'd my selfe , and well assured of their being there , I was wonderfull glad of it ; for this was the onely thing that I did desire , and seeke after for to cast off all care , and to giue a farewell to all my former troubles .

In my comming into the Towne , I was no sooner entred , but I might perceiue in the High-street a Banner , hanging out at a Window ; I past along by it , Guzman comes to Almagro . and went to lodge at one of the Innes there in the Market-place , where I supt betimes , and got me quickly to bed , that I might recouer some of my lost sleepes , and repaire the wrongs of so many ill-passed nights , as I had lately indured .

Mine Host , and those his Guests that he had in the house , seeing me come in so well accommodated , and so well waited on , made inquirie of my seruants , who I was . And they , ( as not knowing any thing , but what they heard from my selfe ) told them ; That my name was Don Iuan de Guzman : Guzman takes on him a feigned name . Sonne to a principall Gentleman of the house of Toral . On the morning very early , my Page brought me my cloathes ; I put them on , setting my selfe forth in all my brauest gallantry , and after that I had beene abroad and heard Masse , I went to visit the Captaine , telling him , that I was come in search of him , to tender my seruice vnto him . He receiu'd me with a great deale of courtesie , and with a cheerefull looke ; which was no more then my respect vnto him might challenge ; besides , the good fashion , that I came to him in , and the moneys , which I brought along with mee in my purse , ( which were little lesse then a thousand Royals ) might merit some respect , for the rest of the birds were flowne , and like Noahs Crow , were neuer to Guzman entertained by the Captaine for a Souldier , and in what he did exercise himselfe . returne againe ; they were spent and gone in gay cloathes , in courting of Wenches , and in good-fellowship vpon the way . He admitted me into his owne Squadron , made me sit and eare with him at his owne Table , vsing me euermore with much loue and kindnesse .

In requitall whereof , I began to a a Regalar : Is to afford a man all the delights and dainties that are to bee had for loue , or money . The word is deriued à Rege : That is , so much that a King can not desire more . Guzman posseth not for a Souldier , as being vnder age . Regalar him , and to serue him ; presenting him still with one thing or other , inlarging my hand like a Prince , as if I had for euery * * A Spanish Prouerb . Tuesday a new payre of eares ; or were sure to meet ( wheresoeuer I came ) with another Grocer , another Riuer , and another Groue of Trees , wherein to hide my selfe . So fast did I spend my money without feare or wit , threw it away with so prodigall a hand , taking ames-Ace against seuen , and deux-Ace , against eleuen ; I did so often visit the Drum-head , that at last , getting little , and losing much , I was almost quite blowne vp .

In these kinde of intertainments did I consume my selfe , and my time , till we were to march away : And for to fill vp the Company , we were all of vs put into a Church , whence we came forth one by one , and when they came to call me , the Pay-Master lookt vpon me , in whose eye I seemed somewhat too yong , insomuch that he durst not inroll me amongst the rest , according to the instructions that were giuen him . Whereat I grew exceeding angry , and was so inflamed with choller , that I had much adoe to containe my selfe , but was ready to breake forth into passion , and to haue lasht out into some liberty of language , whereof afterwards I might haue repented my selfe ; because it might haue forced me to vtter that , which would not haue well beseemed me , nor indeed had beene lawfull for mee to vent , considering the time , and place .

O what good cloathes can doe ! I knew the time , when men would kicke Good cloathes put a man i●… heart . me , and cuffe me about the cares , and could be content to hang my head in my bosome , hold my peace , and take all patiently . But now I made reckning , as if all heauen had layne at the stake , of that which to speake of , was not worth a straw , waxing mad with anger . Then I began to know by Anger , and it 's euill effects mine owne experience that no Wine can make a man so drunke , as the first fit of anger . And it much more blindeth the vnderstanding , not leauing it any the least light of reason . And if that heat should not presently passe away , I know not what fiercenesse or brutishnesse may be compared to this furie of ours . I did quickly quench this flame , and my Hat being come againe to his colour , and my choller pacifi'd , I said vnto him , Sir , you that are Pay-Master , my yeeres ( I confesse ) are few , but my courage as great as any mans . It is the heart that commands , and this arme knowes how to brandish a blade , there is bloud and marrow enough in it , for to vndertake great matters .

Hee answered mee very grauely and wisely , It may bee so , Sir , and I doe verily beleeue it , and with much more willingnesse , then your selfe can speake it : but the Order that I haue giuen me in charge is thus and thus , wherein if I should exceed my Commission , my Purse must soundly pay for it . No body shall smart for it , but my selfe . I knew not what to replie to so faire an Answer , though the bloud that boyled in my brest , and the colour that shew'd it selfe in my cheekes , could not so easily be alaid , till my choller were a little better settled . My captaine was very sensible of this affront of mine , and tooke it as tenderly as if the case had beene his owne .

For being quitted of my place , he was perswaded I should then presently forsake his Companie . And taking part with me against the Pay-Master , hee was somewhat round with him , insomuch , that neither of them hauing the patience to beare one with another , they grew to high words , and much adoe there was .

This storme was laid the Sea had done roaring , their strife was ended , and the Company was fully made vp . The Captaine came to visit me at my lodging ; telling me in braue and gallant tearmes , how much this griefe of mine did t●…ouble him , and how sorrie he was for my heauinesse ; and with honourable both words and promises , he gaue me that good satisfaction , that I rested very well contented . Such force hath Eloquence , that as horses suffer Eloquence preuaileth much . themselues to be ruled with good Bridles and bitts ; so the fierce rage , and chollericke humours of men , are bridled and gouerned by mannerly reasons , and are brought to winde and turne their head-strong wils , changing their violent resolutions , being easily reduced in the end to a settled pace , and are well content to goe forward faire and softly on their way .

Whereupon , albeit I was resolued to leaue him , yet notwithstanding his words were so powerfull with me , that he stopt me in my course , and suddenly tooke me vp , when I was in the heat and height of my Carreere . Wee continued in this kinde of conuersation a prètie while , and a great deale of good talke we had together ; And if it be not dangerous to speake the truth , ( for feare of being called in question ) we did murmure and mutine at the small reckning , and slight acknowledgement of Soldiers , and men of true A dipressum against bad Mini●…s , touching Martiall men . worth and valour , and the base esteeme that was made of militarie discipline and profession of Armes ; then did we raile at the slight remuneration of Seruices , and with how little truth some Ministers did informe the State thereof , for their owne proper ends : How things are quite out of order , and vtterly miscarrie , because businesses are not well carried , & are not in a course , that should direct them to a good end , euery man tending his particular profit , preferring priuate , before publike good .

And though such a one know , that another man , with a very good zeale and loue to his Countrie , doth gouerne his Armie well , and lead them on brauely , he wrests all h●…s good seruices to the worst sence , and seekes to ouerthrow his well-deserued reputation , laying Nets to intrap him , that he may be the only Commander , ioyning with his enemies , and falling crosse with his friends , that he may bring the dance before his owne doore , and raise himselfe by the others ruine , proposing to himselfe , by this preposterous dealing , to put himselfe into a better fortune .

And to effect this his vnruly desire , he will seeke out a thousand fetches , and as many winding Pipes will he lay before hand , to bring the water to his owne Conduict . He would make himselfe like vnto the highest , and place his throne in the North , and suffer no man to sit by him , or to be his equall . Such men as these exercise their voice only in the seruice of the King , not sticking to crie out , This and this will make much for his Maiesties seruice ; but their workes , and their actions , are directed to their owne good . Like vnto that day-labourer , who lifts vp his armes to heauen , but strikes his Mattocke into the ground . These make warres at their pleasure , breake Leagues when they list , failing in their Obligation , ruining the Common-wealth , robbing men of their Estates , and in the end damning their owne soules .

How many errors haue beene committed ? How many braue Commanders lost ? how many Armies vtterly ouerthrowne ? the fault whereof is laid vpon him , that doth least deserue the blame . And the sole cause of this is , because these men will forsooth haue it so , that this ill shall make for their good . For if things should succeed well , why then it should goe ill with them .

This is the common course now adaies , and this makes a a The Spanish phrase is , Se pone de lodo . Now Poner lo de lodo , e●… , estragar , O errar el negoçio . all out of ioynt , and causes such confusion in the world . Will you see ( Sir ) to what poore passe our ill fortune hath brought vs , that those braue cloathes , gallant Feathers , and glorious colours ; things that put life and spirit into a Soldiers heart , to make him venture couragiously vpon all difficulties , to hew out his way with his Sword , and to vndertake any braue and noble enterprize , in seeing vs thus adorned , we are disgraced in Spaine , our Habit scorned , and our selues flouted at ? Thinking for sooth that we must walke the streets in blacke , like a companie of Soliciters , or like some Seruitour , or poore Scholler , that waites vpon another , and hath not a Gowne to his backe to hide his pittifull raggs , or to couer our totterd cloathes , ( as your Students vse to doe ) with blacke foot-cloathes , that the old rotten Saddle vnderneath may not be seene .

Now are we quite downe the winde , and neuer so much as now ; For those that should most honour vs , doe least fauour vs . The only bare name of a Spaniard , which heretofore did affright the enemie , & with the reputation of that one word , made the whole world to tremble ; now ( for our sinnes-sake ) the glorie of that is in a manner lost and gone . And we are so falne off from what we were , that we are not able to doe that now with our swords , which before we might haue carried with our words . Yet such as wee haue beene , we are , and shall be still . It is God , that must make vs to acknowledge these our errours , and that must worke amendment in those that are the cause thereof ; going ( in that course wherein now they runne ) against their King , against the Lawes of the Land , against their Countrie , and against themselues .

I need not ( Sennor Don Iuan ) to produce any other witnesse , then the present times , for the truth of what I haue spoken , and to proue vnto you , that the maine cause of all your great mischiefes in a State , is a Fauorites inwardnesse with his King , suffring no man to Priuar , or to be able to doe any thing but himselfe , led on with the greedinesse of his owne priuate gaine . From this his ill-imployd Greatnesse , groweth hatred ; from hatred , enuie ; from enuie , dissention ; and from dissention , euill order : from whence you may inferre those other inconueniences , that may follow thereupon . Let it not trouble you , Sir , that we are now to march hence . In Italie , you shall finde another kinde of world ; and here I passe my word vnto you , that I will make you an Ancient . Which albeit , it be a meaner place , then your merits may challenge , yet it may serue as a step to aduance you higher . I gaue him many thankes for this his friendly offer . We tooke our leaues , hee was very desirous to goe home alone , I earnestly intreated him , that I might waite vpon him to his Lodging but he would by no meanes consent thereunto . The next day following the Companie marched away without any stay , till they came neere vnto the Sea-coast ; ( the Captaine spending liberally vpon my Purse . ) We staid waiting there for the comming of the Gallies , but three moneths were almost spent before we could haue any newes of them . In which time , and that which was already past , my Purse had spit his venome , and my rents began to faile me . My continuance at play , did likewise put a helping hand to my speedier dispatch ; so that I was now quite out of Cash , and all my money was gone ; not all in one day , but all , at all these seuerall times . I was ( as your old prattling Gossips vse to say ) reduced backe againe to my former state , and might walke ( as I did before ) with a white Cudgell vnder mine arme . How much did I then risent my former follies ? How angrie was I Guzmans money is all ge●… , and now begins to lamentins follie . Good Instructions for young men . growne with my selfe ? What amendment did I propose vnto my selfe , now that I had not so much as one single pennie left me in my Purse ? How many shifts did I vse to conserue my selfe , when I did not know against what tree to leane ? Who forced me to fall in loue without discretion ? Who made me turne Gallant , without moderation ? Who taught me to spend without gouernment ? To what end was I so free in my play , so franke in my Lodging ? and so prodigall with my Captaine ? Quanto se halla trasero , quien ensilla muy delantero ? Spanish Prouerb . How often is he cast behinde , that is first in the Saddle ? What a shame is it for a man to follow his delights ? What a basenesse , to be captiuated by his pleasures ? I was readie to run besides my selfe , and was almost out of my little wits , that when I had put my selfe in so good a Predicament , I could not hold me there , and keepe my selfe well , while it was well with me .

Now , in regard as well of my youth , as these my youthfull vanities , I was no more esteemed , or respected of any . The friends that I had in my prosperitie , the free table that I kept with the Captaine , the Alferez place , and the ensigne , that he told me he would bestow vpon me , it seemed , that they were all strooken with a sudden lightening , which had burnt and consum'd them . They past as an arrow , that makes his quick-feathered-flight thorow the aire ; like a Thunder-bolt , that strikes to death , before it be discerned ; or to the twinkling of the eye , which opens and shuts in an instant .

When my moneyes fell short , all fell-away from me : as long as I had that , I had them ; That gone , they shooke hands with me , and bid me farewell . Thus by little and little , piece after piece , all my ornaments were taken off , and poore Don Iuan de Guzman was degraded . I was like that Obispillo de San Prouerb . Nicholas , that prettie little Bishop St. Nicholas , respected only for his Holy-day ; and so I , while I had money in my Purse , and no longer .

Those that heretofore did me honour , did visit me , did entertaine me , came to feast and banquet with me , the heart-strings of my Purse being broken , they forsooke me , as being no man of this world ; Not a man that would talke with me , or conderse with me . And not only so , but they would not so much as vouchsafe to looke vpon me , or once suffer me to come in their company . The perfume that did once smell sweet , doth now stinke in their noses . They that knew not before how to be vnkinde , doe now take all things in snuffe . And I that honoured them , am requited by them with dishonour , and all because I am become poore . And as if pouertie had beene a great and heynous offence , I was consigned ouer to the Secular power . My dealing and conuersation was wholly now with the straggling Boyes about the Campe , such as carried Wallets and Knap-sacks for the Soldiers , and on this had I now set vp my rest . And it is good Iustice , Que quien tal haze , que assi ●…o Prouerb . pague . As a man Brewes , so let him bake .

CHAPTER X.

Guzman de Alfarache declareth the mis-fortunes , and the wants of one that is decayed in his fortunes : And how hee followed a Captaine , till he came into Italy ; Exercising himselfe in all kinde of thefts great and small ; for the reliefe and helpe of his Master .

HOw bitter was it vnto me to beginne ; how troublesome to goe on ; how grieuous to indure this new dis-aduenture ? Misfortunes , are burthens that are hard to be borne . But I had been well acquainted heretofore with these kinde of mis-fortunes , and had learned them long since to my great cost . And because these things were not new vnto me , I presently fell to my worke , and liuely bestir'd my selfe about my businesse . And I can assure you , it is a great happinesse for a man to sute himselfe to all occasions , and to know how to turne his hand to all kinde of labour , not relying on these transitory goods of the world , which like Buckets in a Well , are now full , and then empty ; and no sooner vp , but they are downe againe .

But this one thing was my chiefe comfort , That in the time of my Prosperitie , I gained credit against the day of Aduersitie . And I did not count it my least riches , seeing I was to become poore , that I had left a stampe & impression in all mens minds , that I was of a noble and free disposition , by those my former actions , which were able to speake themselues , though my selfe should be silent .

My Captaine made some reckoning of me acknowledging the courtesies , that I had vsed towards him , & was more willing , then able to help me . For ( poore man ) he had scarce inough to serue his owne turne . But he conseru'd me at least in that buen punto and good esteeme , which he had at his first knowledge of me , anon after that we were acquainted , bearing a kinde of respect to the house whereof I came , and to those my supposed Parents .

I was inforced to stripp my selfe ; and laying aside all my gallantry , I began to cloath my selfe againe in a meaner and poorer fashion , and to put on that rich ( though vn-regarded ) Roabe of Humilitie , which I did not thinke on in my brauery , and scorned ( as a thing of nought ) when I was flush , and full of money :

Considering with my selfe that Vanitie and Necessitie could not well sute together . And that one Chaire was not able to hold them both . For the rich man , if he braue it , he is to be borne withall , for he hath where-withall . But that a poore man should be so vaine , is to be but like the Cameleon ; who , whatsoeuer he drawes and sucks into him , is but ayre , without substance . And The rich man that is vaine , and the poore man that is proud , both condemned . Guzman sets himselfe to serue 〈◊〉 Captaine . therefore , as the rich man that is vaine , ought to be abhorred ; So the poore man that is proud , is not to be indured : It is insupportable in the one , and scandalous in the other .

I saw , that I was not able to liue of my selfe , and therefore got to serue my Captaine , making him now my Master , who but a little before was my Companion . And I waited on him with that care , as I did on the Cooke . Howbeit , he commanded me with a kinde of respect , as considering who I was and that my excesses , my childishnesse , and ill-gouerned Youth , had brought me to this low ebbe , that I was driuen to serue him . And hee did thus farre assure himselfe of me , that I would not doe any thing vnworthy a Gentleman , and vn-beseeming my birth and Parentage for any interest in the world . What a man should doe , that would rise by his seruice .

He held me to be as faithfull , and as secret , as I was patient . Hee made me Treasurer of all his secrets ; for which affiance I alwayes shew'd my selfe thankefull vnto him . Hee manifested his necessities , and made knowne his wants vnto me , and what he had spent in his pretensions ; besides , the prolixe time , and the excessiue trauell and paines , whereby hee at last obtained them ; as by intreating , bribing , flattering , seruing , attending , crouching , creeping , making of legges , bowing the head to the ground , with cap in hand , and a quicke and nimble pace , trotting vp and downe the streets from morning to night ; early , and late , without intermission .

I remember he told me , That going out of the Palace with the Kings Fauourite , A trick of a proud Courtier . because he put on his Hat , whilest he was entring into his Coach , he lookt vpon him , as if he would haue eaten him ; and shortly after , gaue him to vnderstand as much , by delaying his dispatch , making him daunce attendance at Court many a faire day , till he thought hee had sufficiently punished both his Purse , & his Patience . It shall euer be in my Letany , Good Lord deliuer vs , when Power and Malice meet .

It is a miserable thing , and much to be pittied , that such an Idoll as one of these , should affect particular adoration ; not considering , that he is but a man , a representant , a poore kinde of Comedian , that acts his part vpon the Stage of this World , and comes forth with this or that Office , thus and thus attended , or at least resembling such a person , and that when the play is done , ( which can not be long ) he must presently enter into the Tyring-house of the graue , and be turned to dust and ashes , as one of the sonnes of the Earth , which is the common Mother of vs all .

Behold ( brother ) and see the Enterlude of our life is ended ; our disguizes laid aside ; and thou art as I ; I , as thou ; and all of vs as one another . Some doe so strut and stretch out their bodies , and are swolne so bigge with the puffing winde of pride , as if they were able to swallow the whole Sea into their bellie . They sport , and play , and follow their pleasures , as if their aboade on earth , were to be eternall . They set themselues aloft , and in-throane themselues on high , as if they would get them out of Deaths reach , and that it should not be in his power to tumble them downe . Blessed bee God , that there is a God . And blessed be his mercy , that he hath prouided one equall day of Iustice for vs all .

I did much grieue at my Captaines pouerty , because I did not know how to remedy it . And by how much the more is the want and necessitie of Want in a great person , is a thing that moueth much compassion . him that is Noble , by so much the more doth the poore man pitie it , then the rich . He had some Iewels left , which he might sell , if need were , but those were things to doe him honour ; and being that he was vpon his departure , ready to imbarke himselfe , where he should haue occasion to vse them , it went against the very heart of him , to marre much , to mend a little .

Now , while these Gallies were so slow in comming , wee were faine in the meane while to goe from one towne to another , to quarter our selues with the best conueniency we could . By that confession , which my Master had made vnto me , I vnderstood his minde , and the end wherefore he did it .

I told him , Sir , I know by good experience , both good and bad fortune ; prosperitie , and aduersitie , and wot well what they are .

In my yonger yeeres I haue trauelled farre and neere , and haue seen somewhat of the world . I shall to the vttermost of my power expresse that loyaltie & faithfulnes which I owe vnto my Master , and to the Stock whereof I come .

Take you , Sir , no care , assuring your selfe , that I will hazzard my life in your seruice , and will so order the businesse ( till better times shall befriend vs ) that for the present , you shall passe ouer the trouble you now are in , with a great deale more ease . Thus did I take a taske vpon mee , that was farre greater then my strength or wit could promise .

From that time forward , I did in this Office that I had vndertaken , performe things of admiration , and such as were beyond beliefe .

In euery place , where we were to lodge our Souldiers , I had gotten a doozen a a The Span●…sh word , is Bol●…ta . i. Scedula , quae ●…abatur 〈◊〉 in belio , v●… proper●…nt ad hospitium . Dicitur autem Buleta , quasi Bula peque●…na ; à 〈◊〉 Bulet●… Et ●…rat Scriptura breuis mandato●…a , qualis est bulla 〈◊〉 . ●…uzmans cunning , wh●… hee seru'd the Captaine . Billets , whereof the least affoorded no lesse then twelue Royals , and some did contribute fifty . My entrance was free into all those houses , where nothing was safe from my hands , no not so much as the water that was in their Wels.

I neuer suffered my Master to be without a Hen , a Chicken , a Capon , or a Pidgeon , both at dinner and supper , and a whole Gammon of Bacon euery Sunday boyl'd in Wine . Neuer did I reserue any thing for my selfe of all these booties that I made . But looke whatsoeuer I got , I put it all into his hands .

If by chance the Master of the house should take mee napping , if it were of small value , it was passed ouer as a thing of nothing , and accounted onely a waggish tricke ; but if it were of any moment , my punishment was , to be brought by my Master before him that had complained of me , and causing my hands to be bound , with the thinne sole of a shoo hee would giue me my payment ; which being of a hollow kinde of graine , it sounded loud , but did smart but little ; the noise was more then the paine . Sometimes I should haue the lucke to get me Sureties , that should passe their word for me , that I should not doe so any more , and then I was pardon'd . But though they should chance to faile me , the chastisement was not rigorous , it did not raise any Wheal●…s or Blisters , nor left any marke of the stripes vpon my body . And because I knew , they were giuen mee more for fashion sake , then any ill will ; and rather to satisfie others , then to hurt me , before euer the blow came neere mee , I would cry out , as if I had beene ki●… ; and set out such a throat , as if I would hauerent the very walles of the house asunder .

Thus did my Master and I giue good satisfaction ; he ▪ by complying with his obligation ; and I by supplying of his necessities : By killing first his hunger , and afterwards by g●…uing life to his Honour .

I would so●…times get me out into the High-wayes , and seyze vpon all so●…ts of 〈◊〉 ; then would I seeme to shew them the fauour of the Schoole , in s●…lling them their owne againe ; in-dearing to the owners of them , that it cost me thus and thus much out of mine owne purse , to get these their goods to be returned vnto them , so that I had both money , and thankes for my paines .

Those commodities which wee lighted on in the Villages where wee lay , those that were able , might chance to see them againe , and redeeme them for their money ; but those that had not where-withall , their goods were inuisible , not a ragge to be seen●… ; they that had taken them from them , were 〈◊〉 and gone , and no more newes to be heard of them . At the Musters , when the Muster-master was to see if the Company were full , I would thrust in amongst the Souldiers fiue or sixe yong fellowes of the Towne , well appointed , and made them to passe . Sometimes I would so handle the matter , that putting one single man into the Church , vp aboue in the Charnell house that is made for dead mens bones , fiue times one after another , I receiued fiue paye●… And for him , that was to come last , I would clap a plaister vpon his nose , that he might not be knowne . And euery seuerall time , I did change his cloathes , because my knauery should not be found out , and my tricke discouered .

With these Gigs , & other the like gulleries , mine own person was as good as foure mens payes . My Master lou●…d me as his life for these good seruices that I did him , but he was a great spender ; and therefore both this , and all besides that I coul●… doe for him , was all too little .

When we were come to b b The chi●…e C●… in Catalu●…na , founded 230. y●…res before the 〈◊〉 of C●…st . It was first called Barzino ; of a great ●…age that builded 〈◊〉 , ●…f w●… descended the great A●…lcar . I resently vpon that , 〈◊〉 . And now Barçelona . The ●…omanes afterwards called it Fauentia : But came in time to recouer it's old name . Vid. A●…r . Hort. V●…rb . Barcino . & Ant. Augustin . Dialogo . 70. de nummis antiquis . Guzman comes to Barçelona . Barç●…lona , and ready to imbarke our selues in the Gallies , I found my Master much troubled , as being in a great straight , for that he had receiued no pay from the King , and how to procure moneyes , he knew no way in the world ; nor could mine that I brought him in , stea●… him to any purpose . I saw he was melancholly , sad , and heauy ; I knew streight what disease he was sicke of , as being the Phisician , that had often cured him thereof heretofore . I offred him to apply a sudden remedie for this sore . He had with him diuers Iewels , I knew not well what my selfe , and amongst the rest an a a Agnus Dei , Is Christ our Red●…emer called a Lambe ; not proprietate , sed similitudine . As in many places , he is called a Vine , a Rocke , a Doore , a Shepbeard , a Lyon , &c. ●…t in regard of his meeknesse , vnspottednesse , chastitie , innocence and obedience ; as also , for that he was sacrificed vp to his heauenly Father , for the sinnes of mankinde , with a great deale of proprietie , hee is called the Lambe . And the Romane Church , in the Sacrifice of the Masse , before the holy Communion was instituted , did say or sing this Prayer : Agnus Dei , qui tollis peccata mundi , &c. And Iohn Baptist did signe it with this name . Ecce Agnus Dei , &c. Agnus Dei , is likewise a holy re●…cke , which the Pope blesses , and consecrates the first yeere of his Papacie , and so afterwards from seuen yeeres to s●… yeeres . It belonget●… to the Sexton and the Chaplaine to order and dispose the Waxe , where-into they put Los cirios Pascuales the yeere before . And with great curiositie , neatnesse , and reuerence , and in different Moldes , they take forth these Agnos , of different bignesse , and diuers Figures ; both on the one and the other side , they haue the Lambe , whence this re●…cke takes 〈◊〉 name . And being presented to his Holinesse , he blesses them in the Chappell , and consecrates them with great Ceremonie , 〈◊〉 them into Vessels of Holy-water , which he hath blessed , powring vpon them Balme , and the Crisme , or holy Oyle , saying many Prayers ouer them . It is said , that Pope V●…ban the fift ; sent an Agnus Dei to the Emperour of Greece , with certaine 〈◊〉 Verses , wherein he declareth the excellencie of this holy Relicke ; as that , it is good against tempest , Fire , Lightning , Thunder , and Pestilence ; and against the assaults of the Deuill , and therefore ought to ●…ee had in great reuerence ; Vide Couar●…as . Verb. Agnus Dei : Agnus Dei of gold , a very rich one : it grieued him to part with it . But I told him ; Sir , if you dare to trust me , put this Agnus Dei into my hands , and I will promise you to returne it againe vnto you within these two dayes much improued , and make it better worth vnto you , then now it is . He was glad to heare me say so ; and iestingly said vnto me ; What tricke haue you now in store Guzmanillo ? Hast thou lighted peraduenture ( as thou wast wont ) vpon some new roguish plot , some feate villanie or other , and canst come finely off with it ? Now because he knew , that he might trust his profit , with my sufficiencie ; his honour , with my secresie ; and that his Iewel was sure enough , without farther questioning me , what I would doe with it ; he gaue it me , telling me withall , God grant thou bring it me safe backe againe , and that thy wishes may take good successe .

Loe , there it is , take it , and doe what thou wilt with it . I tooke it of him , put it in my bosome , lapt it vp safe in a little Purse , knit it fast , and ty'd it sure to one of the button-holes of my Doublet . With it I went directly to a * * A fine tricke , put by Guzman vpon a Gold-smith in Barçelona , that was a great 〈◊〉 . Goldsmiths shoppe ; One that was a richman , and a great Vsurer ; I made a large relation vnto him of my person , and how and by what meanes I came to this Companie , and what a deale of money I had spent in a short time , reseruing ( when I should see my selfe in some need ) a very rich Iewell , for the supplying of my wants : And that if he would buy it of me , he should haue it reasonable cheape , so as he did not offer me too little , and too much vnderualew the worth of it . But withall , I aduised him , that hee should first informe himselfe of my person , and my qualitie , who and whence I was ; and in knowing of it , ( without rendring any reason why hee was so inquisitiue , taking that for a sufficient satisfaction to himselfe ) he should walke forth and meet me at the Sea-side , for there I would stay for him , and there hee should finde me all alone , wishing him to make as much haste as he could .

This man , who had a great minde to this Peece , and was greedy of gaine , inform'd himselfe of me from the Captaine , the Officers , and some other of t●…e Soldiers ; receiuing so much satisfaction , as was sufficient to content him . For they did all of them witnesse one and the same thing ; That I was the sonne of a principall Cauallero , rich , and nobly descended , and that being desirous to see Italy , I came to their Company with a couple of seruants attending on me , well clad , and with good store of Crownes in my Purse ; that I had spent it all ( as young men vse to doe ) which was the cause , that I was now in that poore case , as himselfe might well see .

All this made as well for me , as my selfe could wish it ; it fell out pat , as I would haue it . My honest Vsurer told me what they said , that hee was very well satisfied therewith , and that he might safely deale with me for any thing that I should sell him . He desired my Iewell of me , that he might looke vpon it , and that he would giue me as much for it , as it was worth . I told him , that we would goe aside by our selues into some secret place , and there he should haue a sight of it .

We went a pretie waies off , and when I had found out a fit place to my minde , I put my hand in my bosome , and tooke out my Agnus Dei , of whose price I was well informed , as one that knew what it cost . The Gold-smith lik't it well , and had a great desire to buy it . For , besides that the gold-worke was very well wrought and curiously enameled , it had diuers stones in it of great value . I demanded of him for it two hundred Crownes , which was little lesse then the price that was paid for it , when it was first bought . He began to turne and winde it this way and that way , holding it one while vpward , another downward , to see which way it shew'd it selfe best , and gaue the brightest lustre .

He found a hundred faults in it ( only to bring downe the price ) offering me a thousand Royals at the first word . I was resolued , that hee should not haue it vnder a hundred and fiftie Crownes , and it was as well worth that , as one Royall ; and vnder that I would not part with it . And here vpon the By , let this serue by way of aduice to him that is to sell , that he must neuer descend so low as the price for which he meanes to sell it , but that he should driue his bargaine so , that the buyer may rise to his price ; looking still , when he shal come higher and higher , and so by standing off , get as much for it as you can . We giue and take ; I offer , and he bids ; At last , my cunning Merchant comes vp to a hundred and twentie Crownes ; I thought with my selfe I should neuer draw him higher , and that it was enough ( if not too much ) for that which I pretended ; and for so much I sold it him . He was loth to leaue me , till he had paid me ; and would faine haue had me to haue gone with him : but I told him , Honest sir , God blesse your life , and send you well to doe ; if I should goe hence alone with you , I am afraid , le●…t that money would bee taken from me , which I purpose to keepe till I come to Italy , to furnish mee with clothes , that I may come in some good fashion , when I make my selfe knowne there to my Kinsmen , and friends .

And if some Soldier or other should hap to see mee goe with you , they would presently suspect , that it is rather to sell , then buy any thing of you . And if they shall perceiue , that I haue any store of Copper or siluer money about me ( being but a Boy as I am ) they will take it from me , and I shall haue no remedie against them . And therefore God be your good speed , goe your waies , I will stay for you here till you come , bring your gold with you , so many Crownes , as we haue agreed ●…pon , and you shall haue the ●…ewell away with you , and God send you as good lucke with it , as I shall wish you .

Hee well approu'd my reason , and hasted home ( like a young Colt in his full gallop ) for to fetch them . I had giuen notice to a Companion of mine , ( a confident seruant of my Masters ) that he should stay there waiting for me ; And that when I had giuen him such a signe ▪ he should as secretly as he could haste in vnto me . Hee lay close in ambush ; The Goldsmith by this time is come , he counts me out my Crownes in the Palme of my hand : I had the Iewell in my purse , I sought to vntie it : but because the knots were knit so fast , I could not so easily doe it . My Vsuring Merchant had hanging at his girdle a paire of kniues in an old greasie sheathe ; I desired him , that he would lend me one of them . Hee ( not knowing why I borrow'd it ) pulls me out his knife , and giues it me . I cut the string asunder , leauing the knot fast knit to my Doublet , as it was before , and I gaue it into his hand together with the Agnus Dei . The man began to maruell ; and as●…t me why I did so , and wherefore I had put it there ? I told him , that because I had neuer a Boxe , nor no Paper to lap it vp in , I had done as I did , and that the matter was not great , for the Purse was old and little worth , and I had no great need of it : and as for those Crownes that I had of him , I should make a shift to ●…ew them vp in some one ragge or other about my cloaths , where no body should come at them .

He tooke the Iewell of me , iust in the same manner as I had giuen it him , and after that he had put it in his bosome , we tooke our leaue , and he went his way . I gaue the signe to my Companion : hee comes ; I giue him the Crownes , and aduised him , that he should hie him home with them , and giue them to my Master , and tell him , that I would be with him by and by .

That done , I made after my Goldsmith , and though by reason of his large strides , he had the aduantage of me , and got ground vpon me , yet I ran after him , till the occasion I expected , did fairely offer it selfe vnto mee . And so watching my time , when he was iumpe euen with a Company of Souldiers , that were standing together , I tooke fast hold of him with both my hands , crying out , A thiefe , a thiefe , helpe , honest Souldiers , for Gods sake come in and helpe me , for this Rogue hath robb'd me , hold him fast if you loue mee , let him not goe , take ( and you be good men ) ô take , take quickly the Iewell from him , for my Master will kill me , if I come home without it , and this Villaine hath violently taken it from me .

I was well knowne to all the Souldiers , and as soone as they heard me , and saw the pittifull moane that I made , they beleeued I said truth . Hereupon they laid hold on the man , to know what the matter was . And because hee that complaines first , the Iustice commonly goes on his side ; and that whining and crying out of wrongs receiued , many times ouercome the right , more by clamour , then any good claime that they can make ; I cry'd out more and more , and kept such a stirre and such a noise , that I would not suffer him to speake , and if he did , then I was so loud againe and so clamorous , that they could not heare him ; putting this tricke a a The Spanish phrase , is haziendole el juego Manna . That is , when one goes deferring the conclusion of a businesse , because he knowes it will goe against him , for that his cause is not good . Couarruuias . Verb. Manna . vpon him in the playing of my game . I did implore their helpe with great exclamations , with my hands linked one within another , and lifted vp to heau'n , and with my knees , creeping and crawling on the ground , crying out vnto them ; As yee be Gentlemen , good my Masters , take pittie and compassion of me ; for the Captaine my Master will surely kill me . This tribulation of mine did much trouble them , it did grieue them to see me in this pittifull plight .

At last , they began to aske me what the matter was ? and how , and wherein I had beene wronged ? Nor was I herein wanting to play my part ; now I had the hand of him , I would be sure to hold it ; gracing my lie with all the credit I could , that I might leaue the lesse roome for his truth to enter . For , mans Hearing , contracting Matrimonie on the sudden , vpon the first word that is giuen , will hardly be diuorced from it , but let it alone , and liue and sticke thereunto during life , be it for better or worse . So that all the rest that come after , are but as Concubines , that come now and then to the Hearing , but haue no settled abode there : They may perhaps , like gadding Girles , touch at this eare , and that eare , and the t'other , ( as at so many doores , or other folkes houses , ) but there is no dwelling for them , they must packe and be gone .

Hauing this string to my bowe , ( setting a good face on the matter ) I vp , and told them ; This morning , my Master left his Agnus Dei at his beds-head vpon his pillow ; he willed me to keepe it , and to looke safe vnto it ; I tooke it , and first put it in my Purse , and then in my bosome , ( thinking I had made all sure enough ) but meeting with this good man ( you here see ) by the Sea-side , I pull'd it forth to shew it him ; And because he was a Gold-smith , I askt him , what it might be worth ? He told me , that the body of the Iewell was but Coppe●… double-gilt , and that the Stones were counterfeit , no better then Glasse . Yet askt me withall , whether I would sell it ? I told him no ; it was my Masters . Hee demanded then of me , if my Master would sell it ? My answer was ; Sir , I know not : you were best aske him , for hee can best tell you . After this , he proceeded farther in talke with me , asking me , who I was , whence I came , and whither I would ; And so held me on in such idle discourse , till we were both alone , but of sight of any ; and drawing a knife out of that sheath of his that hangs there at his girdle , hee willed me to make no words , for if I did but offer to squeake , though ne're so little , or but wagge a foote from that place , there was no way but one with me , he would presently cut my throat . I stood shaking and quiuering , while hee was taking the iewell out of my bosome , and because he could not readily vnty the knots , I had knit them so fast , he made no more adoe , but cut the string asunder , and so went away with it . And I thinke he hath it still about him ; search him , I beseech you ( good honest Souldiers ) for Gods sake search him .

The Souldiers seeing that the purse was cut indeed , turn'd towards my Goldsmith , and lookt some-what strangely vpon him , who was strooke therewith so dead , that he had not a word to say for himselfe . They took the Agnus Dei out of his bosome , which he had carried away in the purse ; as I had before informed them , so did they iust finde it about him .

Then did he begin to fall a cursing & swearing , vowing by no small oaths , that I had sold it vnto him , and that I with mine owne hand , with that very knife , cut the purse my selfe , and afterwards deliuered it vnto him , and that I had of him for it a hundred and fifty Crownes in very good gold . But for all his swearing and staring , they would neuer a whit the sooner beleeue him ; Thinking in good discretion , that it was not likely , that he would venture to buy any such piece of me , for hee might very well thinke that it was stolne Ware . Besides ( which made much for me ) they had searcht mee all ouer , from top to toe , but could not finde one penny of money about me .

Making this to serue as a strong proofe against him , they vs'd him very homely , both in words and deeds . And whatsoeuer he said vnto them to iustifie himselfe , it was all one , he had been as good to haue held his tongue , for after that , they would neither beleeue , nor heare him . They had forcibly taken the iewell from him ; Hee complaines thereof vnto the Iustice ; I was brought before him ; There I opened the case anew , ( as before you haue heard ) not failing so much as one syllable in the relating of that , which I had formerly deliuered .

The Witnesses were sworne , and iustified what they had both seene and heard . And in the end , the businesse was brought so about , that it was concluded , the Goldsmith should be seuerely punished . But vpon intreaty , hee had a brotherly correction , and so sent packing . And as for me , I had my Iewell giuen me in open Court , with charge to carry it home to my Master . I went with it to his lodging , and there in the presence of all his people , I deliuered it vnto him .

There are many that loue treason ; but few that like the Traitor . Well Amo proditiorem , proditorem odi . may an ill man , by working ill , please that ill man that sets him a-worke , for the working of his ends . But when the deed is done , it can not be , but that in the brest of that man , there is so much mischiefe imprinted , and such knowne Characters of Villany written in the fore-head of him , that none of those that imploy him , will trust him , either any farther or longer , then they haue vse of him to bring their purposes to passe . What I had done did nothing displease my Master . At that time he lik't it well , yet it troubled him somewhat , and he could not well tell what to thinke of it . These tricks of mine did him good seruice , ( and that he knew well inough ) but he was afraid both of them , and me .

With these kinde of Cordials , I kept my Master in heart , till hee came to Genoa ; where , ( hauing dis-imbarkt ) and hauing now but little need of my seruice , he shifted me off . Your Traitors , and other such like wicked Villaines , are like vnto Vipers , or your Scorpions ; which when you haue taken the substance of that from them , which you seeke for , you take them , and throw them vpon the dunghill . Onely they are nourished by all sorts of men ( especially your Great-ones ) who make exceeding much of them , all the while they vse them as instruments of their pretended ends ; but those once effected , they bid you fare well , they will haue no more to doe with you , vnlesse it be to vndoe you , as you haue others ; and so let you goe , for such a one as you are ; caring rather to vse , then to keepe a Knaue .

Some few dayes after our arriuall , my Master call'd me aside , and said vnto me ; Youth , you are now in Italy , your seruice will be of little vse to me ; and your Rogueries may doe me much wrong : Heere is some-what for you to helpe you on your iourney , dispatch quickly , and be gone , for you haue free liberty to goe whither you will . He gaue me some moneys of small value , and some few Spanish Royals ; all was a matter of nothing , scarce worth God a mercy ; and with this poore pittance , I tooke my leaue of him and left him . I walked along with my head in my bosome , musing in the street as I went , on the great force of Vertue , which did neuer leaue any man vn-rewarded ; whereas Vice did neuer suffer any man to escape without punishment , and shame .

I would faine haue spoken then vnto my Master , and haue told him , that he might be pleased to remember , that I had relieu'd him in his wants , supplyde his necessities , taken a great deale of paines in his seruice , to my great cost and hinderance . But I thought with my selfe , that he would twit me in the teeth with those things , and lay them to my charge , and that therefore he was the willinger to rid himselfe of me , as of a rotten member , good for nothing , but to infect all the rest . And so I rested from that . Now seeing in what disgrace I was , and hoping to finde out my kindred there , I made the lesse reckning of it . So I went dayly vp and downe the Citie , seeking by that meanes to learne the language , which as yet I neither vnderstood , nor knew , out of the desire that I had to know , and to be knowne .

THE ROGVE , OR , THE FIRST PART OF THE LIFE OF GVZMAN DE ALFARACHE . The third Booke . Wherein , he treateth of his beggerly course of life , and what therein hapned vnto him , whilst he was in Italy .

CHAP. I.

Guzman discourseth of Pouertie , and of the wrongs and outrages , which a poore man indureth ; As also of Riches , and of the honours that are done vnto the Rich: As likewise of the naughtinesse of this present world : And how not finding his Kindred , which he sought for in Genoa , he went to Rome ; and of a iest that was put vpon him , before he left that Citie .

WIth Flatterers , no rich man is a foole ; nor no Poore man wise . For they still weare Spectacles The nature of 〈◊〉 . of the largest sight ; by reason whereof , things represent them selues far greater then indeed they are . It may truly bee called , Wealths-Moth , and Truths-Worme . Flatterie resideth most with the Poore , being the greatest enemie that he hath : For that Pouertie , which is not the Daughter of the Spirit , is but the Mother of shame and reproach ; it is a dis-reputation , that drownes all the other good parts that are in man ; it is a Disposition to all kinde of euill ; it is mans most Foe ; it is a Leprosie , full of anguish ; it is a way that leads vnto Hell ; it is a Sea , wherein our Patience is ouerwhelmed , our honour is consumed , our liues are ended , and our soules vtterly lost and cast away for euer .

The Poore man is a kinde of money , that is not currant ; the subiect of euery The Poore mans Epith●… , and his wretched condition . idle Huswiues chat ; the off-scumme of the people ; the dust of the street , first trampled vnder foot , and then throwne on the dung-hill ; In conclusion , the Poore man is the Rich mans Asse . He dineth with the last , fareth of the worst , and payeth dearest : His Six-pence will not goe so farre , as a Rich mans three-pence ; His opinion is Ignorance ; His discretion foolishnesse ; His suffrage , scorne ; His Stocke vpon the Common ; abused by many , and abhorred of all . If he come in Companie , he is not heard ; If any chance to meet him , they seeke to shunne him ; If he aduise ( though neuer so wisely ) they grudge and murmure at him ; If he worke Miracles , they say , he is a Witch ; If vertuous , that he goeth about to deceiue ; His veniall sinne , is a blasphemie ; His thought , is made treason ; His cause , be it neuer so iust , it is not regarded ; and to haue his wrongs righted , he must appeale to that other life . All men crush him ; no man fauoureth him ; There is no man , that will relieue his wants ; No man that will comfort him in his miseries ; nor no man , that will beare him Companie , when he is all alone , and oppressed with griefe . None helpe him , all hinder him ; none giue him , all take from him ; he is Debtour to none , and yet must make payment to all . O the vnfortunate and poore condition of him that is poore , to whom euen the very houres are sold , which the Clocke striketh , and paies Custome for the Sun-shine in August !

And as your rotten and refuse-flesh , comes to be meat for dogs ; so , as an vnprofitable piece of flesh , the discreet poore man comes to be eaten vp and deuoured by a company of ignorant Chuffes . But it is quite otherwise with The rich mans Epit●…ices , and his condition . the rich : How smooth doth the Wool goe on their side ? What a fresh gale of winde is still in the poope of them ? In how calme a Sea doe they saile ? What faire weather , free from the least cloud of care ? And what carelesnesse in those stormes , which other men suffer ? Their Granaries are full of corne ; their a a The Spanish 〈◊〉 , Cub●… . 〈◊〉 v●…o 〈◊〉 de ●…las de Ma●…ra del gad●… , que se çinne conar●… y cercos y communemente se 〈◊〉 las cub●…s , par●… echa●… en ellas el V●…no . Couarruuia●… . Butts of Wine ; their iarres of Oyle ; their Chests of money . In the Summer , he keepes himselfe from the heats ; And in the Winter he clothes himselfe warme to defend him from the cold . Of all men he is well receiued . His fantasticall tricks , are gentleman-like carriage ; His foolish speeches , are wise sentences ; If he be malicious and hath a pestilent pate to plot mischiefe , then is he said to be subtill , and to haue a shrewd head of his owne ; If he be prodigall , they stile him liberall ; if couetous , a warie wise fellow ; if giuen to 〈◊〉 , he is a wittie Gentleman ; if foole-hardie , of a braue daring spirit ; if ●…udent and full of ribaldrie , he is a merry man , and a fine Companion ; if 〈◊〉 in his taunts , and giuen to detraction , an admirable Courtier ; if incorrigible , all m●…tall ▪ if scoffing , pleasant-witted ; if babbling and full of prate , they tearme him sociable ; if vicious , affable ; if a Tyrant , a powerfull man ; if obstinate ▪ constant ; if blasphemous and full of oathes , a very valiant fellow ; if dull graue and fit to make a Counsellour . His errours the earth couereth ; all are afraid of him ; none dare offend him ; Euery mans eare is t●…d to his tongue seeking by their attention to please his palate ; and not a word that comes from him , but is entertained by them with as much solemnitie , as if an Oracle had spoken vnto them . He will not be said nay , but will haue what he list , making himselfe both Partie , Iudge , and Witnesse . When he will countenance a lie , his power makes it to passe for a truth , and , as if it were so indeed , it is so receiued . How is he accompanied , how visited , how feasted , how magnified of all men ?

In a word , Pouertie is the poore mans portion , and riches , that of the rich . And therfore , where good bloud boyleth , & the Pulse of honour beats strongly want is held a greater losse then life ; death is not so hurtfull , nor seemeth halfe so terrible vnto him , as Necessitie . For money warmeth the bloud , and makes it quicke and actiue : Whereas he that is without it , is but a dead body A man without money , is a body without lif●… . that walkes vp and downe like a ghost amongst the liuing . A man cannot without it doe any thing in it's opportune and fit time , he cannot execute his desires , nor accomplish any thing , whereunto he hath a liking .

This is the course of the world , it hath alwaies kept this tracke , it is no new thing , but euen from the beginning , to see a a The Spanish phrase , is , Que de atras le viene al garbanço el pico . Which is rendred as I haue here set it downe . Vide Couarruuias . Verb : Garbanço . men of base birth , and meaner parts , to waxe proud and arrogant . There is no helpe nor remedie for it ; So we found it , and so we shall leaue it ; we must not looke for a better time , nor thinke that it was otherwise heretofore . All whatsoeuer , either hath bin , is , or shall be , is still one and the selfe-same thing . Our first Father was credulous and light of beliefe ; our first mother a Lyer , and false of her word ; The first sonne that was borne into the world , a thiefe and a Fratricide , one that kild his owne and only brother .

What is there now , that was not heretofore ? Or what can we hope for in that which is to come ? If what is past seemeth better vnto vs , it consisteth only in this , that we are more sensible of the ill that is present ; and call to remembrance those good things of old , which being so farre off , are quite absented from vs : yet when our troubles are once ouer-passed , we are so glad , when we finde our selues to be well rid of them , as if they had neuer beene . So your Medowes beheld from a farr , are very pleasant to the eye , and delightfull to looke vpon , but when thou drawest neerer vnto them , thou doest not finde so much as one hands breadth of ground , where thou mayst conueniently sit thee downe , all that thou seest , being nothing else but bogs , pits , and stones . We see the one , but neuer thinke on the other : it is as common , as ancient in the world , for euery man to loue prosperitie , to follow after riches , to seeke for fulnesse , to procure preferment , to pursue plentie , and to hazard our liues to get where withall to liue , and to grow into money ( which is the mother of abundance ; ) For where that is wanting , the father towards the sonne , the sonne towards the father , brother towards brother , and I my selfe , euen towards my selfe , breake my faith and my word , and abhorre mine owne selfe .

This lesson , time hath taught me , out of the discipline of his experimontall discourses , hauing punished me with an infinite number of miseries and afflictions .

I plainely now perceiue , that if ( when I arriued at Genoa , ) I had considered what I was , and but looked well into my selfe , I would not haue ventured so farre as I did . And if I had had but the wit to haue reserued that occasion to some better fortune , I should not happely haue beene ruin'd and vndone by it , as you shall heare here-after .

As soone then as I had left the Captaine my Master , hauing made of all my totter'd rags and other old clouts , a kinde of Scar-crow ( for they would scarce serue for any other vse ) to fray away birds from the Fig-trees , I would needs boast my selfe to be descended of the b b The e●…ymologie of this word Godo , or Gothe is diuers : and comes of Gathia , a Prouince so called Got , also signifies a Father , which is a phrase properly belonging vnto God . If from bence we deriue the name of Gothes , they must be men of esteeme , as Heroes , or good men . Goet , is as much as Good , from Got ; qua voce Deum vocamus , quia bonum à Deo descendit , & ad Deum deducit . It is not a●…isse to thinke that Godo in it's Language , signifies Good . Some would haue it come of the Hebrew word Goi , which is by interpretation , Gens , or Natio . But fetch it whence you will , I am sure of this , that the Gothes were Lords of innumerable Prouinces , and particularly of Spaine , where they ruled a long time , till the vnfortunate raigne of Don Rodrigo , and of the Reliques of those , which had retyred themselues into the Mountaines , the Nobilitie of Spaine began anew to lift vp their heads , which conti●…th to this day ; and is still in such estimation amongst them , that when they will set forth the presumption of some vainegl●…us fellow , they will aske him , Si deciende de la casta de los Godos . Whether he bee ●…ineally descended of the race of the Gothes . Gothes , an ancient Gentleman , and neerely ally'd to most of the Nobilitie of that Citie , giuing out , that I was such a one , and come of such a house ; and making farther inquirie of my Fathers ancient Familie , and his great Alliance in that Citie , it caused such distastefulnes , & such a loathing in them towards me , that they did hate me to the death . And it is to be supposed , that if they could haue done it without any preiudice to themselues , they would haue giuen it me ; And thou also wouldst haue done the like , if such a guest should haue come within thy doores . But they manifested their good meaning by those actions , which they vsed towards me . There was not that man to whom I made my selfe knowne , that did not relieue me with a boxe on the eare , a flirt on the lips , a kicke on the breech ; and he that did least hurt or disgrace me , did not sticke to spit in my face , vpbraiding me with the name of Villaine , Rogue , a a Couarruu . The Spanish word is , Marrano . i. Porcus vn●…s anni . Et Iudaeus recenter conuer●…s ad Christianismum , cum Hispanis , vocat●…r Marrano . A notable pleasant trick put vpon Guzman , by a Genoes . Moore , and the like . Art thou a Genoues ? Thou art the sonne of some vile lewd woman , no better can be conceiued of thee . And as if my father had beene terra filius , a sonne of the earth , a mis-begotten Bastard , or as if he had been dead some two hundred yeeres agoe , I could not finde so much as a foot-step of any friend or kinsman of his . Nor could I discouer any thing , till one came vnto me , and greeting me with a Serpents tayle , like a crafty old Scabbe ; ( O that accursed old Villaine , that sonne of a Whore ; O how did he coozen me ! ) clozing fairely with me , vp and told me :

I haue heard much talke ( my Boy ) of your Father , and I can bring you acquainted with those that shall render you a large relation of your Parents , and those none of the meanest ; but ( if I be not deceiued ) euen the best , and noblest in all the Citie .

And because I suppose you haue supt already , come and take a bed with me at my house , ( for now the time is fit for nothing else ) and to morrow morning we will walke a turne or two about the Towne , and I shall bring you to those ( as I told you ) that knew him very well , and had long conuersed with him . The good presence that he carried , the grauitie wherewith he vttered his words , his good proportion of body , his decent attire , his bald-head , his white Beard , which reached almost downe to his Girdle , and the Staffe which he bare in his hand , represented ( me thought ) vnto me another Saint Paul . I trusted my selfe with him , I followed him to his house , with a great deale more desire to sup , then to sleepe : for that day I had made but a bad dinner , as well for that I had beene chafte and angred ; as also that it must haue been at mine owne cost , which made me to quake , as oft as I did but thinke vpon spending but a farthing .

But because that which the rich giue vs , is but little , and what we call for , must cost vs money , we eate but little bread , and that ( God knowes ) stale , and hard ; though to vs , that are almost hunger-staru'd , it seemes a great deale , and soft inough . Besides , I was now growne a pinch-belly , and a very miser to my selfe .

I went along , but with feeble legges , ready to faint for hunger , after that I saw what an Host I was like to haue , & how ( like a Cordouese ) he told me by way of preuention , that I had already supt : And had it not bin out of the feare that I had to lose so faire an opportunity , I would not haue gone with him , vntill I had first visited some tippling house . But the hope of that good which seemed to weight for me , made me too leaue the Bird that I had in my hand , for to follow the Oxe , which fled too fast from me , for me to catch him . As soone as we were come into his house , a seruant came to take off his Cloake ; he will'd him to let it alone ; and they twaine hauing talked together a while in their owne language , he sent him forth : So that now being left all alone to our selues , we walked many a turne , and sometimes talked of one thing , sometimes of another . At last , he drew neerer vnto me , asking me diuers questions concerning Spaine ; and amongst the rest , more particularly of my Mother , as how she was left , what was her Estate , how many brothers she had , and in what street she liu'd ? I gaue him a full account of all , as wisely , and as aduisedly as I could for my life .

In this discourse I intertain'd my selfe the better part of an houre , vntill such time as his seruant was returned . I know not what was his arrand , nor what message he brought him backe ; but my old Foxe turn'd about vnto me , and said vnto me ; So , it is well , inough for this bout , it is time for you to take your rest , get you to bed , and to morrow we shall see one another againe , and then we shall inlarge our minds more freely to each other . Then he cals , O la Antonio , Maria , doe you heare there ? Come away , and conduct this Gentleman to his lodging . I went along with him from lodging to lodging , through this roome , and that roome , I know not whither my selfe ; it was a great large house , wrought with many goodly faire Pillars , whose pauement was all of Alabaster , hewne foure-square .

At last we crosse through a Court , and enter into a lodging , that stood at the one end thereof , which was very well furnished , and fairely hung with Hangings of sundry sorts of colours , like vnto your a a Arambal : is a Moorish word : and is a 〈◊〉 sort of Hangings . Arambales , but that they seemed to be some-what better then they . The Beds-head lean'd against the wall , and close adioyning therevnto stood a little low Stoole . And as if he would haue me to make my selfe vnready , the seruant that was appointed to attend me , offred his seruice to pull off my cloathes . But they were such , and so ragged , that my selfe knew not very well how to put them either off , or on , vnlesse I tooke a great deale of care , disposing of one piece after another , for there was not any one part that was whole , or put in it's proper place , so that it was impossible to discern or know , which was the Ierkin , or the Breeches , when you saw them layd abroad , and stretched out vpon the ground . So that I hauing vndone some few knots , with the which I had fastened them together for want of points , I let them slide off from me at the beds feet . And thus soule and slouenly as I was , and so lowsie , as no man could well be worse , I crept me in between the sheetes . The Bed was soft & good , the sheetes cleane and sweet . And when I was laid , I began to think with my selfe , sure , this good old man is my kinsman , that he vses me thus kindly , but will not make himselfe knowne vnto me , till to morrow morning . It is a good beginning , it cannot be , but that he will giue me new Cloathes , and deale kindly with me , since being in that poore and miserable estate as I was , he had giuen me such good entertainment . Questionlesse it is so , & now wil some faire fortune befall me . I was but yong , I did not diue to the bottome of his drift , I only lookt vpon the Superficies , I went no farther then the outward appearance . For , if I had had either wit or experience , I might haue considered with my selfe , that great offers , haue great ends , and that he that is full of courtesie , is full of craft . A grande offerta , grande pensamiento . For such kindnesses as these , are not done for nothing , there is some mysterie more in it , then a man is aware of . And alwaies obserue this for a Maxime , or generall rule , That when a man shall offer the courtesies of an extraordinary nature , and such as heretofore he hath not been accustomed to doe , eyther he meanes to put a tricke vpon thee , or else he stands in neede of thee . The Seruant , when he had me to bed , went forth of the Chamber , leauing a candle burning by me , I spake vnto him , wishing him to put it out . He told me , I must hold him excused , and that he would not doe so , for in the night time , there flye vp and downe in that Countrey ( almost in euerie corner ) certaine Bats , or Reare-Mise of an extraordinarie bignesse to those in other places , which are very offensiue , and doe much hurt , and that the only remedy against them , is to haue a light standing by ones bed side , for they can by no meanes indure it , but seeke to auoid it by flying away from it into some blind corner or other .

He likewise told me , that this their Country was full of Hob-gobblins , and Robin-good-fellowes , which were all great enemies to the light , but in your dark lodgings , they did now and then play their parts , and do many a shrewd turne . All which I did beleeue with the greatest simplicitie in the world .

This said , he went his wayes ; and he was no sooner gone , but I presently got me vp , and made fast the doore , not that I was afraid of robbing ( for I had nothing to lose ) but out of a suspition and iealousie that I had , that some one mischance or other might befall me ; being yong , vnfriended , vnknowne , and in a strange place , where I neuer was before .

Hauing ( as I thought ) made all sure , I returned back againe to my bed , fell presently asleepe , inioying ( to my great content ) a sweet and quiet rest ; for the Pillowes , the a a Your Spanish Colchones , are like our finer sort of English Matresses ; quilted with Wooll , or Flaxe ; for in your 〈◊〉 Countries they vse no feather-beds . Colchones , the Couerlets , and the Sheetes did drinke a Health vnto me , and I ( with a very good will ) did soundly pledge them .

The better part of the night was now ouer-past , the beame of mid-nights ballance began to decline , and leaned a little towards the breake of day , whilest I , being in a dead sleepe , was wakened on the sudden with a confused noise of foure parts : Diuels they seemed to be by their shape , their habit , their blacke curled haire , and by those fearefull vgly vizards , which they had vpon their faces .

Hauing walkt their Stations a while about the Chamber , they came at last vnto the bed , wherein I lay , putting me in such a fright , that I lost my sences for a time , and without any word speaking , off they plucke the Couerlets from me , anon after the Sheetes . I wondred what a Gods name would become of me ; I fell as fast as I could for my life , to crossing and blessing of my selfe ; I ranne ouer my prayers , I called a thousand times vpon the name of I●…svs ; but they were Daemonij baptizati , Christen Diuels , and therefore drew still neerer and neerer vnto me ; They had put vpon the Colchone , vnder the nether sheet , a Blanket ; euery one tooke hold of his corner , and haled me forth into the middle of the roome . I was much amazed , and extremely troubled , when I saw that my prayers could not preuaile ; insomuch , that I did neither dare ; and if I durst , yet I was not able to open my mouth , nor to speake so much as one word ▪ if I might haue all the world for my labour .

The roome was high-roofed , and fitted for their purpose ; where , when they had me out amongst them , they began to blanket me , and to tosse me vp in the aire , as they vse to doe dogges at Shroue-tide , till growing so weary , that they could hold out no longer , they left winnowing of me ( being sufficiently fanned already ) and laid me downe there againe , where they found me ; and leauing me for dead , they couered me with the cloathes , and went out that way they came in , hauing first put out the light . I was so dis-ioynted , and so broken as it were in pieces , and so beside my selfe , that when it was day , I did not know , whether I were in heauen , or heere vpon earth : God , who was pleased to preserue me , knew for what end he did it .

It was now about eight of the Morning , and I was willing to rise , for that I found my selfe reasonably able to get vp . Me thought , I did not smell so sweet as I should , my body cleauing to the Sheetes , no clay could be more clammy , nor any plaister cling closer .

This put me in minde of my old Masters Wife , the Cooke . And although there are no perturbations , without some one disorder or other , yet this did much afflict me . But now the Crow could bee no blacker , then were his wings : And therefore I rubb'd ouer all my body with the cleanest places , that I could meet withall in the sheetes ; which when , I had done , I beganne to buckle my harneys vnto me , and fall a knitting of my old knots , to my older cloathes . And the longer I was in making of me ready , the more I did consider with my selfe , what a Diuell that should be , that had befalne mee this last night : And if when I rose vp , I had not found my limm's almost shaken in pieces , my bones bruized , and in a manner out of ioynt , I should verily haue thought , that it had beene but a dreame . I look't round about the roome , but could by no meanes finde which way they should come in . By the doore it was impossible , for I had shut that sure with mine owne hands , and found it 〈◊〉 lockt , as I left it .

Then I began to cast with my selfe , whether they might not be those Hob-gobblins , and Robin-good-fellowes , which the Yong-man told mee of ouernight . But that ( me thought ) could not be ; for if it were so , then had hee done very ill , that he did not aduise me before-hand , that there were some of these same mad merry sprites , that delighted as much in light , as other more melancholly Diuels did in darknesse .

Whilest I was musing on this businesse , and deuising with my selfe , how or which way they could get in ; I lifted vp the Hangings , to see , if behind them I could espy any little out-let ; at last I lighted on an open window , which did butt out vpon the Court , thorow which we crost . Then I presently said with my selfe ; This way were the Bulls brought in , my hurt came in at this Window ; And albeit euery rib in my bodie , and all my bones throughout , did rattle in my skinne , making such a noise for all the world as your Chesse-men doe , when you shake them together in the bag , yet I did dissemble it all that I could ( in regard of that slouenly part , which I had plaid against my will ) till I should see my selfe quite cleare of the house : I threw vp the bed as handsomely as I could , couering all as close as might be , that if any should come in , they might not smell out my fault , and finde out the feeblenesse of my retentiue faculties , and so the same Deuils be brought in againe , and torment me anew .

The seruant , that brought me thither , came to mee towards nine of the clocke , and told me , that his Master expected me in the Church , and that I must goe thither vnto him ; And because I would not willingly haue his man stay behinde in the chamber , that I might get the start of him , I intreated him that he would doe me the kindnesse to bring me to the doore , because I was vnacquainted with the house , and knew not the way out . So he brought me forth into the street , and returned backe againe .

When I saw I was come off cleere from him , as if I had beene borne with wings at my feet , and my body had been sound & whole , I tooke a a Tomar las calças de Villa diego . Vale huyr mas que de passo , This Prouerbe is in Celestine , but it 's originall vnknowne : But it should seeme Villa Diego was driuen to his shifts , and not hauing time to put on his breeches , was forced to flye away with them in his hand . Couarr . verb. Calças . Guzman , leaues Genoa , and goes for Rome . Villa diego his Breeches , and tript away so nimbly , that he that had runne Post , should hardly haue ouertaken me . Hee runnes fast that flies : Feare addeth wings and strength ; thought was not swifter then my flight . I bought something by the way to satisfie hunger , and for to gaine time , I eate as I went , and made no stay , till I was out of the Citie . Where in a Tauerne I call'd for a Cup of Wine , where-with I refresht my selfe , that I might walke the stronger towards Rome , whither I had directed my iourney , thinking all the way as I went vpon that grosse scorne , whereby they sought to banish me out of Genoa , to the end that my pouertie might not disgrace them ; but I did not remaine their Debtor , nor had they any great cause to bragge thereof in the end , as you shall see in the second part .

CHAPTER II.

Guzman discourseth of the vnhappinesse , greatnesse , and commendation of Necessitie and Want ; And how after hee was gone from Genoa , he fell a begging . And how keeping Companie with other poore beggers , he was instructed by them , of their Statutes , and Lawes .

IFled so fast out of Genoa , that if Lots wife had but done that , which I did , she had neuer beene turned into a Pillar of Salt . I neuer offred to looke backe , my Anger spurd me on , and put me vp to the height of my speed ; for when choller once Anger and it's effects . begins to boyle , we hardly feele the wounds that are giuen vs , though they be neuer so mortall , neuer so deadly . Besides , by how much the more a man re-bringeth as it were himselfe , to himselfe , and looketh home into his owne bosome , by so much the more hee comes neerer to the recognition and knowledge of his hurt .

I escaped from the ouerthrow giuen at a a Ronçes valles , is a Monasterie , built by King Don Sancho de Nauarra , which he indowed with great Rents ; it is a Couent of Can●…s Regular , who beare in their brests an Azure Crosse , hauing the forme of a shepheards Crooke , or Crosier staffe . Heere was a great battell fought . The said King lies buried in this Monasterie , his body being brought from Tudela , where he died . Ronçes valles , como perro b b Vexigas , are certaine Blisters , which rise vpon the flesh , through heate , or some other accident , and commonly grow on the feet of men or beasts , with ouer much trauaile . Couarruuias . Bexiga . con bexiga ; like a Dog , that claps his taile betweene his legs , and through too much haste to be gone as farre as his feet will carry him , growes sur-bated , and stiffe in his ioynts . There was not one firme ligament in all the whole Fabricke of my body . But I did not much feele it , till I came to rest my selfe ; When I drew neere to a little Village some ten miles off from Genoa , where I sate me downe , not knowing whither to goe , being bruised in my body , naked of cloathes , without money in my Purse , and blacke and blue all ouer , as if I had beene beaten with a Cudgell .

c c Necessitie and it's effects . O Necessitie ; how doest thou abate mans courage ? How doest thou take off his Metall ? How doest thou dis-hearten his bodie ? And howbeit it be true , that thou doest sharpen the wit , and refine the vnderstanding , yet thou destroyest the faculties therof , by diminishing and taking off so much from the senses , that they are readie to bee flaw'd and crackt in pieces through too much sufferance , and that intolerable patience , whereunto they be put .

There are two sorts of d d Two sorts of Necessitie . Necessitie ; The one shamelesse and impudent , which ( like an vnmannerly guest ) comes of it selfe , without being called . The other , which being inuited , straines a little curtsie , but comes vpon intreatie at the first bidding . That which vnrequested , e e Necessitie , that inuites it selfe , and the miserie thereof . bids it selfe , God deliuer vs from it ; And this is that , of which I treat . This is like a powerfull guest in a poore mans house , who out of his greatnesse brings a thousand followers along with him ; it is that man of Warre , wherein a multitude of mischiefes , ( like so many Pyrats ) stand readie armed , wayting to doe hurt . It is the framer and plotter of all kinde of trecheries and villanies ; hard to be indured , and worse to be corrected . It is that Lucerna Nauis Praetoriae , that Lanterne in the Admirals Ship , which all couzenages and deceits attend and follow ; it is the sport of Boyes and children ; a foolish dance , a ridiculous Comedie , the sad and direfull Tragedie of honour and of vertue . It is fierce , foule , fantasticke , furious , fastidious , faint , facile , feeble , false : only she failes of being a Franciscan . And it is a wonder , if she afford any other fruit but infamie .

That other , which we bid & inuite , f f Necessitie , that comes not before shee bee inuited ; and the greatnesse thereof . & comes not but when she is called , is Lady-like , liberall , rich , franke , powerfull , affable , generous , sociable , gracious , acceptable , and welcome to all . She leaues vs a full and plentifull house , feeds vs at her costs , and defraies all recknings ; she is a firme defence , an inexpugnable Tower , true riches indeed , and good , without hurt ; That g g Necessitie , not necessited , and the commendation thereof . Necessitie ( I say ) which necessitates it selfe , but is not necessitated , is the place of perpetuall rest , the house of God , and the way to heauen . It lifteth vp mens mindes , it addes strength vnto their bodies , it doth innoble their fame , it cheereth their hearts , it magnifieth their Actions , and makes their names immortall .

Let renowned Cortes , her truest Louer , sing forth her praises . Her legges and feet are of Diamonds , her body of Saphires , and her countenance of Carbuncles , it shineth , it cheereth , and it quickneth , it is full of pleasure , lustre , and life . But that other neighbour of hers , lookes like a filthy old sluttish Laundresse , where you shall see nothing but a heape of Spittle ragges , full of matter'd stuffe , and the soiles of vlcerous sores , which no eye is able to indure , it is so loathsome to looke vpon , and therefore ( with a great deale of reason ) abhorred of all . Behold and view me well , for I am one of those , with whom Necessitie fell in loue , she neuer left following me , but kept me company at bed and at boord , liuing in deadly sinne , by being bound to seeke out meanes to maintaine her . And to this end , she made me studie the h h ●…iuion , 〈◊〉 a 〈◊〉 fellow that will not worke●… , but goe from Towne to Towne , from house to house , to begge a piece of bread , and a Dish of drinke . It is a French word , Bribeur , Mendicus . Briber Mendicare . Couarruuias . Bri●…iatick Art . This was the course I ran , I was to day in one place , and to morrow in another , begging an almes of all that I met with .

It is fit , that we should giue euery man his due . And therefore I must confesse vnto thee , that there is much charitie vsed in Italy , and indeed so much , Italie , a charitable Countrie . that this new Trade , that I had betaken my selfe vnto , made me loth to leaue it , I found so much sweetnesse in it . For in a few daies I grew flush , and able to make wing to maintaine my flight ; So that from Genoa , whence I came , till I saw Rome , where I stayd , I performed all that Voyage , without spending so much as one farthing . The money that was giuen , I kept that whole and intire , and for victuals , I had euer sufficient , and more then would serue my turne . I was yet but a Nouice , and therefore threw that away many times to the dogges , which afterwards , when I had more iudgement , I fold for money , which brought me in no small gaines .

I had a great minde ( as soone as I came thither ) to put my selfe into new cloaths , that I might be some-what againe like my selfe ; but this counsell of mine ( me thought ) was not so good ; and therefore repenting my selfe of it , I said thus with my selfe ; Friend Guzman ; take heed , lest this other doe not proue-like that of Toledo . And if being well clad , thou shouldst not chance to meet with a Master , how wilt thou haue bread to put in thy mouth ? Content thy selfe , and continue still as thou art ; For , if being well apparelled , thou shalt beg an almes , they will giue thee nothing ; Keepe that which thou hast , and leaue off the●…e thy vaine and idle humours .

This deliberation tooke place : and hauing now set vp my rest , I knit another knot vpon my Purse-strings , and then I spake vnto my money , and said , Here rest you quiet , for I know not what need I may haue of your helpe . I began then in these my old raggs , that were not good enough to make waste Paper , hanging those totterd streamers as handsomely as I could about mee , ( which seemed like so many little pieces of rauell'd Flannell , so full they were of Iiggs and iaggs ) to beg for my liuing .

Hauing recourse still at noone to those places , where there was either bread , or porrage to be had ; and sometimes it would so fall out , that I should get as much at once , as might very well serue three more besides my selfe . I visited your Cardinals , your Embassadours , your Princes , your Bishops , and other great mens houses , not ouer-skipping any one of them . I was directed vnto them by another young Youth of that Countrie , he was my Guide , who was well skill'd in that craft , and was the first Tutor that euer read any Lectures vnto me in this kinde . Hee taught me the first grounds and Principles of this learned Science , and the different Species and formes of begging , how this man was to be sought vnto , how that ; what phrase of language to be vsed towards such a sort of people , and what a differing fashion to those of another kinde . For we must not haue all one tone , for all sorts of persons , but must varie our note , alter our straine , and applie our selues to that stile , which we shall thinke will take best , and most moue and affect the partie , whose deuotion we craue .

Men doe not care for curious words and choyse phrases , they loue not the smoothnesse of flatterie , and as little can they abide to be beaten about the eares with loud exclamations ; that which they like best , is an honest plaine kinde of begging , Por amor de Dios ; Good Sir , for Gods sake , bestow one poore pennie vpon me .

Your women , they are wonderfully deuoted to the Virgin Mary , to our Lady del Rosario , and the like ; with these you may be a little more liberall of your Language , beseeching God , that he will direct all their Actions to his holy seruice , that he would deliuer them from all deadly sinne , from the accusation of false Witnesses , from the power of Traytors , and the malice of euill tongues .

This being well pronounced , and repeated ouer and ouer ; with a great deale of vehemency of words , and a strong and earnest deliuery , makes their purses presently fly open , and happy is she who can first supply thee with an Almes . He taught me how to worke the rich to compassion , how to mooue the poorer sort to pitie , and how to oblige the religious deuout man , that he should not be able to get from me , before he had giuen me an Almes . He instructed me so well in such a company of fine cunning tricks in this kinde , that I got a great deale in a little time .

There was not that man , but I did know , euen from the very Pope , to him Cono●…ia desde el Papa , hasta el que estaua sin capa . Prouerb . that had ne're a Cloake : that is , from the highest to the lowest . I did runne ouer all the streetes of Rome , and that I might not bee too troublesome by begging too often in one place , or of one person , I did diuide the whole City into certaine quarters , euery working-day walking my seuerall Station ; but on Sundayes and Holy-dayes , I was wholly for your Churches , I neuer mist , but punctually kept my houres , and there I made good purchase . But that which I made most profit of , were the pieces of bread , that were giuen me : These I sold , and they yeelded me many a faire penny . Part whereof those poore men did buy , which did not goe vp and downe a begging , but * * The Spanish word is , Tenian la bola en cl embogue . were faire for it , being ( as they say ) the next doore to it , who out of their pouerty , were faine to trade with me , because I could affoord them a good bargaine .

And some I sold to poore Country-folkes , such as make a liuing of feeding Pigs , and fatting of Poultry . But those that were my best pay-masters , were your a a Qui coquit & facit turrones Turron . Copta Crustulum . A Bisket made with Honey , Almonds , small Nuts , Wa●…uts , Kernels of Pine-Apples , &c. Turroneros , for to make their Alaxur or b b Alfaxor is a Moorish word ; And is a kinde of Conserue , made of Hony , Spices , and crummes of bread . Couarr . verb. Alaxu . Alfaxor , as they call it in Castile . I did helpe my selfe besides , with some old hous-hold ragges , who , for that they saw I was young , and naked , did in pitie bestow them vpon mee , which were something worth to mee , though to them they were things of nothing .

Afterwards , I fell in company with some other of more ancient standing in that faculty ( for they had their distinction of degrees , & prioritie of formes , as in Schooles ) for the better increasing of my knowledge , & that from them I might learne how to gouerne my selfe wisely and discreetly . These Rogues had beene admitted into the Liuery long agoe , and had borne Office of Renters and Wardens , men that had held preeminence amongst them , and deseru'd to be Masters of their company . With these I went to some knowne Doles ; there being some men that did dayly ( out of meere deuotion ) distribute almes euery morning to the poore in their particular houses . Going once to receiue this Dole in the French Embassadors house , I might heare other poore Beggers , that were behinde me , begin to murmure , saying ; This Spanish vnhappy Boy , which beggeth heere now in Rome , is newly come , and a meere stranger in this place , he is not acquainted with this course of life , and for want of knowledge , ( by that which I haue obserued in him ) he is likely to beat downe the market , and if some order be not quickly taken with him , he will vndoe vs all . For hauing once fill'd his belly , in the most places where he comes , if they giue him any victuals , he refuses to take them , and tels them ( God be thanked ) he hath dined well inough already . He will quite ouerthrow the Art of begging , by giuing the world by this meanes to vnderstand , that we poore Rogues haue more giuen vs , then we can well tell what to doe withall . So that if he runne this course a little longer , he will hurt vs , and doe himselfe no good .

Another of their Comrags , that was there with them , Tush ( quoth he ) hold ye your peace , let me alone with this Lad , I will take him to taske , and yee shall see how I will worke him . I will instruct him how to vnderstand himselfe , & how he may not easily be vnderstood by others . Leauc him ( I say ) to me . With that , speaking softly vnto me , he called me vnto him , and we went out alone by our selues from all the rest of the Company . He was an excellent Proficient , and a very ready and dextrous man in all that appertained to that Art .

The first thing that he did ( as if he had been the Protopobre , or Prince of Beggers ) was , to examine my life , asking me , Whence I was ? What was my name ? When , and to what end I was come thither ? Then did he deliuer vnto me the great obligation , that Beggers had to keepe a decorum in all their actions , to hold correspondence one with another , and to linke in loue together like sworne a a The Spanish word is Hermano de mesta . A certaine iurisdiction belonging to Heards-men and Shepheards . The Etymology thereof is not so easie ; but I will deliuer what I thinke , remitting my selfe to others better opinion . It is termed Mesta , quasi mixta . By reason of the concurrency and mixture of diuers Herds and Flocks one amongst another . And because they make restitution of those that are thus inter-mingled one with another , which are knowne by some Markes branded with hot irons . Or it is said to be Mesta , of amista , because of the great conformitie and friendship betweene these kinde of people , who are very obseruant of their Lawes . This the Idiome of Aragon doth confirme , who name that , which the Spaniards call Mesta , Ligallo , which is as much as Liga , and Liga , is a confederation , or friendship . brothers , and that I should informe my selfe of certaine curiosities , and secrets , and some Principles , which I did not as yet know . For in very truth , that which I learned of my Youth afore-mentioned , and of other poore Rogues of lesse talent , and farre inferiour both in knowledge and experience , were all triuiall things , and of no esteeme , in comparison of those precepts , which I receiued from this Grand-Master of his faculty . He gaue me certaine Rules , which I shall neuer forget as long as I liue .

Amongst the which , one was , that I should vnfold three or foure leaues of my stomake , and open the booke to a plaine vomit , yet to be so well read therein , that it should not appeare to the world , that it proceeded from any surfet , or that I had ouer-charged my stomake . He taught me a tricke how to turne vp my stomake in some by-corner , which wrought two good effects .

First , it moued the people to compassion , thinking that I was sicke : Secondly , though afterwards I should swallow downe two Platters of warme pottage , there would be roome inough still for more . And so by this meanes the infamy and misery that the poore indured , would the bettter be published and spred abroad . I knew how many bits I was to eate , and how I was to looke vpon the bread that they gaue me , how to kisse it , and how often , and what kinde of countenance to cast vpon it : What fashion of behauiour I was to vse , and how to carry my selfe vpon all occasions , differing the forme , according to the diuersitie of mens dispositions . I knew the true tone of my voice , when I was to rise , and when to fall with it . I knew the set houres wherein I was to repaire to such or such a place ; In what houses , I might enter in euen to the bed-side , and in what , I might not presse no farther then the doore . I knew whom I might bee bold to importune , and be earnest withall in my crauing ; and whom againe I ought not to sollicite or speake vnto aboue once . In conclusion , he gaue me in writing all the Statute-Lawes , and Orders , ordained by that free Common-wealth of beggers , instructing me in the obseruation of them , for the auoiding of scandall , and the better informing of my vnderstanding And these are they that follow .

The Lawes and Ordinances , that are inuiolably to be obserued amongst Beggers .

FOrasmuch as all Nations haue their proper method of Begging , and are distinguished and knowne by their sound , and by a differing forme from all others ; as are your Almanes by their singing , and going in troopes ; your French-men , by their praying ; your Flemmings , by their making of legges , and their low and frequent Congies ; your Gypsies , by their importuning ; your Portugals , by their weeping ; your Italians , by their long Circumlocutions ; and your Spaniards , by their bigge lookes , and high language , as if they would swagger a man out of an Almes whether he will or no ; whereby they make themselues hatefull to their owne hurt , being held no better then vaine babblers , and a kinde of insufferable proud Rogues ; these therefore we more especially will & command , that they reform this disorder , beare themselues ciuilly , that they doe not curse , nor blaspheme , ( as too commonly they vse to doe ) but that they keepe good order , according to our Statutes and Ordinances in that case prouided .

Item , we will and command ; That none of our brother Rogues , or begger what-soeuer , either wounded , or lame of any of these Nations , whence , or whatsoeuer , shall ioyne and vnite himselfe with those of another Country , and that not any person or persons of all , or any one particular , shall make any Couenant , Compact , or Alliance , with any blind men , that goe saying their prayers , from doore to doore , nor with any Mounty-bankes , Musicians , nor Poets , nor with Slaues set at libertie , though our Lady her selfe should haue released and set them free from the power and tyranny of the Turkes , nor with old Souldiers , which being totter'd and torne , haue forsaken their colours , and fled from their Captaines ; nor with Mariners , that with one storme are dis-heartened , and haue no more minde to goe to Sea . For howbeit all and euery one of them doe sute and agree well together in all kinde of cheating , and roguish tricks , and would make excellent beggers , yet the Art it selfe of Begging , and the language are much differing . And therefore we will and command euery one of th●…se to keepe his owne quarter , and strictly to obserue such Orders as are set downe and ordained in that case .

Item , We will and command , that the poore of euery Nation , especially in their owne Countries , haue certaine Tauernes , and knowne victualling houses , where shall ordinarily preside and gouerne , three or foure of the more ancient amongst them , hauing Staues in their hands , as Ensignes of their precedencie , and authoritie : Whom wee depute , to treat in those places of all such Accidents and other things that shall happen there , or shall otherwise be brought to their knowledge . That they shall sit in Councell , and giue their opinion therevpon . And when they haue so done , they may afterwards play at Foxe mine Host , or some other drinking a a The Spanish word is Rentilla : The Italian , Gattacieca . It is some Tosse-pols game , wherein your Ale-Knights , and idle Rogues sit ouer their Cups , and censure and deride all estates . Game , at Cards or Dice for their recreation , and to wash away care . They may sit ouer the Cup , and tell old Stories : they may recount the famous Acts , done either by themselues , or others , as also of their Ancestors , and boast of those warres , wherein they haue serued , and what-soeuer else they shall thinke fit for intertainment .

Item , We will and command ; That euery Begger carry a good Bat or Cudgell in his hand , and those that are able , to put a good Pike at the end of it , that they may be armed and prouided against all casualties , that may befall either their Purse , or their Persons . Which they are to doe vpon penalty of their own hurt .

Item , That no Begger may , or doe weare any new garment , or but halfe worne out , saue such as is rent and thred-bare , and full of patches , by reason of the ill example that may grow thereby , & the generall hurt that may come of it . Alwayes prouided , that if any such Coat or Cloake bee giuen by way of Almes , that then it shall bee lawfull for him to weare it that day onely wherein it was giuen him , without any farther limitation of licence , but the next day following to put it off , and neuer weare it more , but forthwith to alter the propertie , vpon paine of our generall displeasure , and his owne particular hinderance .

Item , We will and command , That in the taking of their places , and their seates , they doe all and euery one of them obserue , antiquitatem possessionis , & non personae the antiquitie of possession , and not of the person ; preferring the ancienter in standing , before the elder in yeeres . And that no man shall dare of presume , to vfurpe or defraud one another in this kinde .

Item , We will and command , That two sicke , or two lame persons may ioyne and goe together , and call Brothers , but with this condition , that they begge by turnes , and straine their voices as high as they can reach ; the one still beginning where the other leaueth , obseruing equall time , and tune , euery one keeping his one side of the street ; and not vsing any artificiall phrases , or affected forme of speeches let each of them expresse , as significantly as he can , his particular griefe ; and let them afterwards part and share the gaines betweene them , vpon paine of our Worships displeasure .

Item , we will and commaund , That no Begger carrie from the knife vpwards , any armes , either offensiue or defensiue . That he weare no Gloues , Pantofles , Spectacles , his hose trussed or his stockings gartered , vpon paine of forfeiting of all his temporalties .

Item , it is farther enacted , That they may weare a foule filthy clowt knit about their heads in stead of a Kerchieffe .

They may also beare about them a paire of Sizars , a knife , an Awle , Needle and thred , a Thimble , a woodden Dish , a a a The Spanish word , is Calabaça : wherein Pilgrims and beggers carry their beuerage . Gourd , a little Hand-basket , a Scrip , a Wallet . Be it alwaies prouided , that they beare no Sacke at their backe , no basket of burthen , no b b Alforjas , is a Wallet deuid e into two parts , that it may the more easily be borne vpon a mans beast . It is an Arabicke word , to wit , Ahfodja , of the Verbe Ahfad , which signifies to keepe : because in it Trauellers keepe their prouision . Alforjas or Knap-sacke , which Trauellers vse to put their prouision in , when they are to goe some great iourney , nor any such like kinde of things as these be . But it shall be only lawfull for them to walke with two Crutches , and a sore legge , with a long and deepe tent in it .

Item , We will and command , That all beggers beare two purses about them ; one littleone , and another of a bigger size , besides certaine priuate pockets for closer conueyance , that may safely indure a search ; and that they put the almes that is giuen them into their Hat . And Wee further will and command , that they neither may make , nor doe make any Pouch or Budget , in Coate , Cloake , Frocke , Gabardine , Cassocke , or Mandillion , vpon forfeiture , it being once espi'd and found out , they may chance to lose it , and stand registred euer after for fooles vpon record .

Item , We will and command , that no man discouer the secrets and mysteries of our Trade , nor diuulge and publish them abroad , saue only to those that are Professors of the said Arte. And he that shall inuent or finde out any new tricke or cunning deuice for the common good , shall be bound to manifest the same to the incorporation of beggers ; to the end , that it may be vnderstood and knowne of all , for as much as such good things as these , are to be accounted as common , there being no prohibition to the contrarie ; and more especially , not to be concealed from those that are our Country-men , and naturals of the same Kingdome . But for the better incouraging of others , and that notice may be taken of our good gouernment ; We giue priuiledge , and plenary power to the first inuentor and Author thereof , that for the space of one whole & complete yeere , he make his best benefit of the first impression , not suffring or permitting any , without his especiall and particular Licence , to vse or exercise the same , vpon paine of our heauie displeasure .

Item , We will and command , That all beggers shall manifest and make knowne to one another , all those houses , where any almes are to be had , especially those , where there is any Gaming , as also such places , where your Gallants vse to meet , and court their Mistresses ; for that is a certaine rent , and seldome faileth .

Item , We will and command , That no begger breed any hunting Hounds , Greyhounds , or bloud-Hounds , nor may in his owne house haue any more then one little Mungril-curre ; for the which wee giue free libertie and licence , and that he lead him along with him either ty'de in a string , or otherwise fastened to his girdle .

Item , We will and command , That none shall carry a dog about with him , making him to dance and leape thorow a Hoope : nor shall it be lawfull for him to haue or hold any place to begge at the doore of any Church , any station , or Iubilee , only he shall haue free leaue to begge as he passes along by the street , vpon paine of being counted contumacious and rebellious to our Lawes and Ordinances .

Item , Wee will and command , That no begger presume to come to the Butchers shambles , or to the Fish-market , to buy either fish or flesh , saue in case of extreme necessitie , and licence of the Phisician ; nor that he sing , play vpon any Instrument , leape , or dance , by reason of the scandall that may arise by so doing .

Item , We licence and permit , that such beggers as are so disposed , may rent certaine children , to the number of foure ( but not aboue ) their ages being first examined ; and if two of them be taken for twinnes , borne of one wombe , at one and the selfe-same time , it shall not be thought amisse of , in case that the elder of the two be not aboue fiue yeere old . And if it bee a woman that goes about with these children , she shall beare one of them sucking at her brest ; and if a man , he shall carry one of them in his armes , and lead the other along by the hand , and not otherwise .

Item , We will and command , That those Beggers that haue any children , they make setting dogges of them , to lie watching close at your Churches , and haue still an eye vpon those that come in and out , for whom it shall be lawfull to begge an almes for their poore father or mother , that lie very sicke and keepe their beds , and haue nothing to helpe themselues withall , hauing foure or fiue small children , that are ready to starue for want of food . Alwaies prouided , that it be so taken and vnderstood , that this Patent extends not to any that is aboue sixe yeeres of age ; for if they shall once exceed and passe those yeeres , then are they to shift for themselues , and like birds that are flush , to forsake the nest , and like Hounds that are readie to be entred , nose out their owne liuing , and goe abroad , and bring home their prey at vsuall and ordinarie houres .

Item , We will and command , That no begger giue consent , or suffer his children to serue , to be bound Prentice to any Trade , or to waite vpon any man , whom he shall acknowledge for his Master . For their gaines will be little , and their labour much : And therein they shall greatly offend , by not following the steps of their forefathers , and running a course quite contrary to that good way , wherein they haue beene borne and bred .

Item , We will and command , That by seuen of the morning in the Winter , and at fiue in the Summer , no begger be in his bed , or keepe his lodging , but by breake of day , as soone as the Sunne shall be ready to peepe forth , or some halfe houre before they goe abroad to gather honey for their hiue . And likewise , that some halfe an houre before the shutting in of the Euening , he by all meanes , and at all times retire himselfe , and get him home ; saue only in some cases reserued , and that with our especiall leaue and licence .

Item , We permit and giue leaue , that they may breake their fast in the morning , ●…ating a morsell of some thing or other , if they haue laboured for their liuing , and gotten any thing the same morning , and not otherwise . For therein they lose time ( which is a precious thing ) and spend vpon the stocke , by diminishing the principall . But with condition , that he wash and clense his mouth , that the sent thereof be not perceiued ; As likewise , that he passe not vp and downe the streets , or by any mans house , playing with a cloue of Garlicke in his hand , a sliced Onion , or that his breath smell of Wine ; vpon paine of being held incapable and vnfit to begge .

Item , We will and command , that no man dare to play the Impostor , or commit any grosse villanie , as to steale houshold-stuffe , or helpe to conuey it away , or exchange it for other , or to vntyle houses , or strip children of their cloathes , or to commit any the like base action , vpon paine of being excluded from our brotherhood , and put out of our incorporation , and to be remitted ouer to the secular power .

Item , Our will and pleasure is , that euery begger , when he shall be of full age ; that is , ( three yeeres after twelue , being fully complete and ended ) hauing legally and worthily laboured in that course of life , and attained to the true arte of this our free and noble Profession , he be held , taken , knowne , and vnderstood ( be it any such manner of person or persons ) to haue fulfilled the Law , and comply'd with the Statute : notwithstanding , that two other yeeres to gaine experience , and to learne how to driue the a a Xauega is the Span●…sh word , which is a Fishers net at Sea , wherewith by little and little , they goe drawing and haling the fish to the shore , where certaine Picaros and Rogues are still waiting for to pull and tugge at the c●…rdes of the net , whom they call Los de la Xauega . It is an Arabick word , which in it's owne termination is said to bee Xibquetum , of the Verbe Xebque , which signifieth , to intrap , or bring into the Net . fish into the net , haue alwaies to this very day and present houre , beene thought very necessarie and expedient ; and euer after to be held as a Graduate , that hath performed his exercise , and taken Degree amongst vs . And hauing thus profest himselfe , and made proofe of his learning and manners , we farther will and command , that he haue , hold , and inioy all the Liberties , Priuiledges , and exemptions granted by vs vnder our great Seale ; but with this condition , that he neither may , nor at any time doe forsake our seruice , and that hee shew his obedience vnto vs , by obseruing our Lawes and Statutes , and by submitting himselfe to our Censure , in case he shall offend against them .

CHAPTER III.

How Guzman de Alfarache , was not only reprehended by a learned Rogue , and Doctor in his facultie ; but likewise how he learned of him some new Orders and Capitulations , concerning this his roguish kinde of life , and that which hapned vnto him in this his vpright course ; And of many Precepts and lessons , deliuered vnto him vpon this point by a Cordouese , an old cunning Crosse-biter .

BEsides these Ordinances , they had many other which they duly kept and obserued , not worthy at this time to be spoken of , which were prescribed and compiled by the aduice and counsell of the famousest Rogues in Italy , euery one ( in his time ) setting downe such Lawes , as then seemed most conuenient . So that it might be said of them , that they were another new Recopilation , or gathering together of those of Castile . These were much illustrated in those daies by one , whose proper name was Alberto , whose surname Mizer Morcon : Whom in Rome , we had made choyce of Mizer Morcon , Generall and Superintendent ouer the beggers . for our Generall ; Who , for his stature , shape , proportion of body , his fashion , conuersation , and commendable carriage , deserued to haue the Imperiall Crowne set vpon his head . For he farre surpassed all his Predecessours , who were no way to be compared vnto him , so farre did he outstrip all them that had gone before him . He might deseruedly be stiled the Prince of Roguerie , and the Arch-begger of Christendome . Hee would deuoure you at one meale , all the tripes and intrailes of two good sheepe , together with the puddings that were made of them , besides the Trotters , a whole Cowes Vdder , ten pound of bread , vnboulted and vnsifted , betweene the beginning and end of dinner , allowing himselfe thereunto in drinke , two b b Euery Açumbre , we deuide into foure measures , which we call in Spaine , quartillos . An Açumbre , may be said also to be a great ●…ig Iarre , or Pitcher fill●…d with wine . Açumbres of Wine . And albeit he himselfe alone got more almes in one day then any sixe of those ordinarie beggers , which gained most ; yet had he neuer any ouerplus left , nor did sell any of those scraps , that were giuen him , nor did receiue any money , which he did not presently drinke out . And he did goe so farre beyond vs , and was euery way so much our superiour , that we must of force ( as Vassals to his good or bad fortune ) succour and relieue him all that wee could . I neuer saw him buttond , nor couered from the girdle vpward , neuer to weare any girdle , nor so much as halfe a hose or shoe vpon foot or legge ; His head was euermore bare , his beard close shauen , and his skinne all ouer his body did shine and glister , as if it had beene anointed and basted with Bacon . This Vpright-man did ordaine , that euery poore body should carry about with him a woodden dish in the crowne of his hat , or some other conuenient place , and the dried rinde of a Pumpion , wherein to put his Wine , clapping it in some close place , where it might not be seene .

That no begger should carry any iarre or pot about him , wherein to drinke Orders , set downe by Morcon , King of Beggers . his water . But when he came to drinke , he should sup it out of a Caldron , a Kettle , a great earthen Pan , some broad Tub , or huge Vatte , or the like , and then too , to thrust in his head like a beast , and not in any other manner .

That he , that should not drinke a sound draught after his Sallet , should bee made incapable to drinke afterwards , as long as that supper , or dinner lasted , and to rise vp a thirst .

That no begging Rogue should buy , or eate any Comfits , Conserues , or the like sweet things .

That euery one should eate either Salt , or Pepper with his meat , vnlesse it haue beene therewith seasoned before . In that case , the doing , or not doing of it , shall be left to his owne liberty .

That your poore Rogues shall be bound to sleepe vpon the ground in their cloathes , without Pillow or Bolster , lying vpon their backs , with their faces vp to heauen .

That hauing gotten inough to spend that day he goes a begging , hee shall trouble himselfe no farther , nor begge any more for that day , but giue way to others to gleane , where he left off .

This our Mizer Morcon , when he did eate , would lye lazing all along vpon the ground , and would sleepe both Winter & Summer , without any couering of Sheet , Blanket , or any thing else that might keepe him warme .

Ten moneths of the yeere , he neuer went out of Tauernes , and victualling houses ; We had ( as you haue heard ) our Lawes and Orders amongst vs , all which I committed to memory , and was perfect in them , but did obserue no more of them , saue such as appertained to good gouernment , and of these I was euery way as religious , and obseruant , as if my saluation had depended vpon the true keeping of them . I made it my chiefe happinesse , and placed a kinde of felicitie therein , that my Actions might credit my Profession , and become absolute in my calling . For things , that are once imitated & begun by vs , when we haue taken them in hand , are not easily to be forgotten , nor to be giuen ouer , till they be fully finished , and ended . For it is a note of small prudence , to enter vpon many things , and to end none of them .

I did not put my hand to any thing , that euer I tooke it away , till I saw my labour ended , and had fully effected what I had vnder-taken . But because as yet I was but greene fruit , and not come to my full ripenesse , whereby I wanted much of my true rellish , I failed much in the practicke part of my profession , and fell short dayly in such casualties as did vsually offer themselues vnto me , and in many of them I did much erre .

Vpon a Feast-day , about the beginning of a a In Italy in that 〈◊〉 it is 〈◊〉 at that time of day . September , towards on●… of the clock in the afternoone , I went forth into the Citie in that great heat , and such a scorching Sunne , that I am not able to expresse it , perswading my selfe , that whosoeuer should heare me begge at that time of day , would verily thinke , that I was wondrous hungry , and taking pitie of me , would relieue me with some thing or other .

I would needs ( meerely out of curiositie , and no other end else in the world ) see what I could get at these vnseasonable houres . I walkt my Stations through Guzman rec●…s the tricks vsed by Begg●…rs : And a 〈◊〉 that was put vp●… 〈◊〉 . some streets , & visited many houses , but could get nothing from them , saue euill words , giuing me foule language , and many a bitter curse , asking me in a Diuels name what I made there ? And so roming about from house to house , I came at last to one , where I knockt at the doore with my Staffe , but no body would answere me . I knockt the second time , and the third , but all was one . Then I inlarged my voice , and began in the highest key I could reach , to set out my throat , and to begge as loud as I could for my life . For the house was very great , and stood farre within , and therefore supposed they could hardly heare me , vnlesse I strained my note a little higher . Whilest I was thus balling at the doore , a roguish Boy of the Kitchen , who ( as it should seeme ) was scouring of Dishes , came iust to the same window , vnder which I directly stood , and threw downe vpon me a great bucket of scalding water ; and when hee saw it had fairely lighted vpon me , he leisurely vtters : Aqua va , quardaos debaxo . Ware water , looke to your selues there below . With that I began to cry out , that all the street did ring of me , grieuously complaining , that I was kill'd by some of that house , and that it was impossible I should liue . True it is , that I was scalded , but not in that cruell manner as I made my crimination .

With this vociferation of mine , and the lamentable exclamation that I made , the people flockt about me , and euery one spake what he thought : One said , it was ill done ; another , that it was mine owne fault ; and that , though myselfe had no minde to sleepe , yet I ought in good manners to suffer others to take their rest .

There were some others , that did comfort me the best they could , and of those that were some-what more tender-hearted then the rest , I made a shift to picke vp some money amongst them , and with the helpe of that , I went first where I might dry my selfe , & afterwards got me home to take my rest ; muttering to my selfe , as I went along , Who ( with a pocks ) made me so curious , as to goe about to remoue the Riuer out of his bed ? When shall I bee able to containe my selfe ? When shall I learne to content my selfe with that , which shal be fit and necessarie for me , without incroaching vpon that , which is not conuenient for me ? What Diuell did deceiue me , and dr●…w mee out of that ordinarie tracke , which I was wont to tread , by making mee to be more forward then the rest of my fellowes ? I drew neere at last to mine owne lodging , and there hard by dwelt an old poore man , about some threescore and ten yeeres of age ; who was borne of beggerly Parents , that had borne Office in our Incorporation , and had left this trade of begging vnto him by inheritance , wherewith he made a shift to liue , and to passe his life away heere vpon earth .

He was of Cordoua , there was he borne : Which I the rather tell you , that A B●…gger that was a Cordouese , teacheth Guzman many lessons concerning the Art of begging . you may know that he was dy'de in his wooll , a notable Rogue in graine , whom his Mother brought to Rome sucking at her brest , in the yere of Iubilee .

When he saw me passe by in that miserable pickle , looking for all the world like a dish-clout , all wet , all to be-moyl'd , foule and full of grease , and all to be spatter'd with the refuse leaues of Coleworts , and the ouer-sodden empty H●…sks of Pease , wherewith my garments were imbroidered all ouer ; he askt me what had hapned vnto me ? I acquainted him with the whole successe of the businesse . He was ready to burst himselfe with laughing , and hauing made himselfe merry a while at my mis-fortune , composing his countenance , with a settled kinde of grauity , in the end he said thus vnto me :

I feare me ( my friend Guzman ) that you will proue another Benitillo , you are such a Hot-spurre , and your young bloud boyles so fast within you , that you would faine come to be a Master , before you haue attain'd to be a Scholler . Doest thou not now perceiue , that thou hast done ill , in exceeding thy Commission , and in breaking those customes , that are ordered and ordained by the Company ? Yet , because thou art my Country-man , and a yong Lad ( and 〈◊〉 apt to erre ) I will teach and instruct thee , what thou oughtest to doe , and how to behaue thy selfe . Sit thee downe by mee , and hearken well to that which I shall say vnto thee .

And first of all , I would haue thee to consider , That you must not goe a begging in the Summer time presently after dinner , when most men are disposed to a a Sestear , i. reposar ala Sombra en la hora de Sexta . Que es la del medio di●…. Y●…r Spaniards ▪ generally 〈◊〉 after dinner all the Summer time . Sestear , and to lye downe and take a Nap , in some place of shade , or some coole roome ; and lesse at Noble mens houses , then those of your Trades-men , and Cittizens . The houre is im-proper , and vnfit , and all of them then either doe , or at least are desirous to take their rest . And it would be as strange , as troublesome vnto them , that any should then offer to wake them ; And importunities , at that time of all other , are most irkesome , and vnpleasing vnto them .

Next , I would haue thee take this Rule of me , ( and it is a true one ) That when you haue call'd or knock't at one doore twice , either there is nobody within , or they will not be within , because they are not willing to answere . When thou perceiu'st that , get thee gone , and stay there no longer ; for thou maist well lose thy time , but thou shalt get no money .

Neuer offer to draw a Latch , or to thrust open a doore that is put to , nor to enter within the house . For it hapneth sometime in the opening of a doore , that ( without the knowledge of those of the house , not once dreaming of any such accident ) a dogge may suddenly rush fiercely forth vpon thee , and carry away halfe a Buttocke at a bit . Nor doe I know how these scuruy Curs should come to know vs , so well as they doe , but I am sure we are hated by them , and they wil neuer let vs passe by them , without barking , or biting . And if the Dog should be missing , some desperate roguish Boy or other will not faile to fall vpon thee , telling thee that , which thou wouldst be loth to heare . And it is well if thou scape him so .

When thou beggest for an Almes , thou must not laugh , nor change thy note , but so tune thy voice , that it may carry the show of one that is sicke , though thou haue health inough for thy selfe , and some to spare for thy neighbours ; hauing a speciall care , that your face keepe an euen correspondence with your eyes ; your mouth it 's equall and iust compasse , and your head bending towards your bosome .

Rubbe thy face a mornings , when thou risest , with a cloth that is rather dankish , then dung-wet , that when thou goest abroad , thou maist seeme neither faire , nor foule . And on thy cloathes , clap many patches , though they bee neuer so hole ; and let them be of diuers colours . For it much importeth , that a poore mans cloathes should be rather patch't , then neat and cleanely ; yet so , that they be not so slouenly , as to cause loathsomenesse .

It will sometimes so fall out , that comming to a man to begge an Almes , hee will take off his Gloue , and put his hand into his pocket , whereof thou wilt be glad , and laugh to thy selfe , thinking that he hath a purpose to bestow an Almes vpon thee , when as in the end thou shalt see him only pull out his Handkerchiefe to blow his Nose . But for all this , thou must not bee angry , nor seeme to grumble at the matter , for it may be some other may bee by him , which will giue thee some-what , though he doe not . Whereas , if he shall perceiue thy proud and sullen carriage , he will giue thee nothing .

Where , thou shalt finde thy selfe well vsed , see thou repaire thither dayly : For as Deuotion shall abound , so shall thy Stocke increase . But see , that thou neuer depart from his doore , till thou haue pray'd for his friends that are deceased , and to intreat of God , that he will be pleased to blesse and prosper him in all his Actions .

Answere euill language , with milde words , and to rough speech , apply soft tearmes ; For thou art a Spaniard , and for our pride ( being ill belou'd ) we are abhorred of all , wheresoeuer we come ; And he that will draw money out of another mans purse , must rather begge , then brawle ; craue , then curse ; Prou. La bezerra mansa , mama de madre agena , y dela suya . pray , then blaspheme . For a gentle Calfe sucks milke from a strange teat , as well as from his damm's .

When they shall not giue thee an Almes , answere with deuotion , God bee thanked : God blesse your Worship , and grant much health , peace , and content to this house , for the great good , and mercy , that you daily doe , & shew vnto the poore . This tricke got mee a great deale of money ; for answering them so gently and ●…o mildly , holding vp my hands , and lifting vp my eyes vnto heauen , they would call me backe againe , and giue me of that they had .

Besides all this , he taught me how to faigne my selfe a Leaper , to make wounds in my flesh , to raise a swelling in my legge , to benumme an arme , to set a counterfeit colour on the face , to alter the whole body , and other curious principles of his Art ; to the end that some might not twit vs in the teeth , and vpbraidingly say vnto vs ; that our limmes were sound , and our selues strong and healthy , that wee should worke for our liuing , and that it were no charitie , to relieue such lusty stout young Rogues . He did me many friendly Offices , he had many curious secrets of nature , whereof he made good vse ; Nor did he hide any thing from me ; for he found me very capable , and apt to receiue whatsoeuer he should put into me ; And then he began to say vnto me , You see my foot is already in the stirrop to goe vnto my graue , and I would willingly leaue a Chaplaine behinde me to pray vnto God for me . And it fell out true as he said ; for within a short time after he died .

Wee did some of vs meet many times together , to repeate our parts , and to make shew , what manner of exclamations would best become vs , and make most for our profit ; These we studied by night , inuenting diuers methodes and formes of benediction . There was a poore man that got his liuing only by making these formes for vs , and did sell them vnto vs , at the rate of so many Comedies or Tragedies . And all was little enough , and no more then needed , to moue mons mindes , and to stirre them vp to compassion .

On festiuall dayes we would be vp betimes , where the Pardons and Indulgences were stirring , that we might prouide vs some good place in the Church ; for it was no small benefit vnto him , that could get neere vnto the Font where the Holy-water was , or to that little Chappell , whither they were to make their station .

Wee would now and then goe a Progresse , and runne ouer all the Countrie , not leauing out a Village , nor so much as a Cottage bordering there-abouts , which we did not goe vnto ; Whence , we came very well furnisht : For they would giue vs Bacon , Cheese , Bread , and Eggs in great abundance , besides cloathes to couer our nakednesse , pittying very much our poore and miserable condition .

Wee would many times begge a draught of Wine for Gods sake , complayning much of the paine and weakenesse of our stomacke . As much as you will , would they say , if you haue any thing wherein to put it .

Wee alwaies carried a little Iarre with vs , vnder colour of drinking water in it , which held somewhat lesse then halfe an Açumbre ; They would euermore fill it brim-full , before they gaue it vs ; But we were no sooner gone from that doore , but we did presently empty it into a a a Bota , quasi imbuta , of the Latine Verbe , Imbuo . It is in briefe , a Bottle or Boracha made of Let●…r , to carry Wine in . Bota , which one of our This word is margented before Company carried behinde him at his girdle , which would well hold some foure Açumbres . And I remember it was once our hap to fill it full in one street alone , so that we were inforced to goe home , and powre it forth into a little earthen vessell ( which they call a Tinajuela ) and then came backe againe to get more .

We vsually went shod , but as good haue beene vnshod , our heads couered , but as good haue gone bare ; So that we had shooes , and no shooes ; hats , and no hats ; For our shooes were sandal-fashion , old enough , and torne enough , and our hats were sutable vnto them ; the one would scarce hang on our feet , the other scarce sit on our heads .

Wee seldome wore any shirt at all . For , when ( according to our accustomed humilitie ) we should craue an almes at such a doore , they would ordinarily say , Pardon me ( my friend ; ) I haue not for you . God helpe you . I will giue you something at another time . Then we begin anew , and cry ; An old paire of shooes , or an old hat ( good Master ) for this poore soule , that hath neuer a shoot to his foot to beare him out of the durt , nor neuer a hat to defend his head from the Sunne and the raine ; Gods holy name be praised . The Lord blesse your Worship ; and deliuer your good Worship from such a deale of The fashions of Beggers in begging an almes . miserie and wretchednesse , as we poore creatures indure . God multiply his blessings vpon you , and free you and yours , and all that you haue , from the power of Traitors and Villaines ; Christ Iesus guard your Worship , and giue you health both of body and soule , which is the greatest wealth of all , and the truest riches .

If after this he shall reply : Indeed ( brother ) I haue not for you , I can not pleasure you at this time , excuse me .

Then , vpon the necke of that comes another replicant , and he laies about him , beseeching him to bestow vpon him some old shirt , though neuer so ragged and torne , for to couer the ●…esh , and to cure the wounds of this poore miserable man , and that he shall finde it againe in heauen , and that God will one day couer him againe with the cloathing of his mercy , and put vpon him a newer and a whiter stole of innocencie and righteousnesse , that shall neuer weare out . I begge it of you for Iesus Christ his sake , he knowes my wants , and that I am not able to worke and labour for my liuing . The Lord helpe me ; And the Lord reward you . And praised be that pure vnspottednesse of ou●… blessed Lady the Virgin Mary .

Now tell me , what heart is there in the world , though of Iasper , and what bowels , though as tough as Iron , and as hard as steele , which will not bee made malleable with this hammer , and melt into compassion with the heat and warmth of so many good words ?

Few houses did escape vs , without some one purchase or other . And neuer a paire of shooes could be so bad , no hat so vile , and no shirt so old , that was giuen vs , but yeeld vs more then a piece of three pence . To vs it was much , but to him that parted with it , of no profit , and lesse reckning . It was to vs a mine in the a a I conce●…e 〈◊〉 , Serro de Potosi , to bee some hill or mountaine in the West Indies , being a principall Mine among the rest , that yeelded great store of treasure . Scrro de Potosi : We had Morchants and Brokers for euery one of these things , who would lay vs downe money for them on the boord , perfumed and washt ouer with the water b b The Spanish word which is , Aqua de los Angeles , is so called by the Spaniards , because it is of an extraordinary sweetnes , distilled out of diuers different flowers , and Aromaticall drugges . of Angels .

We had vpon the way certaine little Asses , whereon we did ride by turnes , when any store of raine f●…ll , that we might the better passe ouer the Riuers , when the waters were risen . And if we did light by chance vpon any person , that seemed to beare the face of authoritie , we began to call vpon him a farre off , many a large step before we came at him to the end that he might haue leisure enough to pull out his Purse , and take forth an almes ; for if we should stay our begging till we did iust incounter each other , many would forbeare to giue vs , lest they might be hindred in their iourney , and so we should goe without it . And taking this course , we did seldome misse .

Other-whiles , when we saw fit occasion and time for it , vpon discouerie of some companie of people that came trooping together , we would prepare our selues to put on a counterfeit lamenesse , to fall a halting , and betake vs to our Crutches : we would change our lookes , alter our countenances , take one another vp vpon our backs , writhe our mouthes , turne the lids and balls of our eyes vp to heauen , some feigning themselues dumbe , other-some crippled , and blinde , making shew that wee could not goe but vpon Stilts , when as indeed we were as nimble and light-footed as the Bucke . We would clap our feet in a trice in certaine Swathes , that hung at our necks for that purpose , and carry our armes in a string , so that with these counterfeit tricks , and the helpe of good language , desiring God to send them well on their iourney , and that he would preserue their limmes , and blesse their eye-sight , and bring them safe to their iournies end , did alwaies bring vs in money . And these we did call our Aduentures , because these good fortunes befell vs abroad in strange Countries , in places that were desart and vnpeopled , and because commonly it succeeded well with vs . But otherwise , we did goe no farther then what was precisely set downe vnto vs , and was held to be necessarie for the performance of our Progresse .

We had one excellent gift aboue all the rest , That there was not any Feast , where we were not present , getting vs some one good place or other ; nor any Banquet : whereof we had not a part ; Our noses were so good , that wee could smell such things some ten streets off .

Wee had no house at all , yet euery house was ours ; For either a Cardinals , an Embassadours , or some Noble-mans Porch or other did neuer faile vs ; And if all , or any of these did faile vs , the Church Porches were free , and no body could there put vs out . So that hauing no proprietie in any thing , wee did not withstanding possesse euery thing .

There were some likewise , that had old ruinous Castles , decayed buildings , and other poore lodgings not worth any thing , where we did make our Rendevous : For all were not permitted to be Aduenturers , nor all allowed a a The Spanish word is Puchero : An earthen Pot , or Pipkin , wherein they boyle las Puches . Now Puches , is a kinde of dressing and seething of meale and Oyle together . Which in ancient time , was much vsed before the inuention of baking bread was found out . Latinè , Pultes . Couarruuias . Verbe Puches , y Puchero . Pipkins to boyle their meat in ; But I ( who was but a young strippling ) looke where I was ouer-night , I would be sure to be there againe the next day ; So that albeit I had many times bad lodging , yet my youth bore it out , and it seemed to me as good as the best .

CHAP. IIII.

Guzman de Alfarache discourseth of the Charitie , that we are to vse towards our neighbour ; He recounteth what befell him with a Gentleman : And of the free life , and great libertie which a Begger inioyes .

ONe true signe , and assured token of our predestination , is the A good marke of Predestmation . Pitie and Compassion which wee haue of our neighbour . For , to haue a fellow-feeling of another mans miserie , ( as if the case were our owne ) is a deed of Charitie , which couereth Charity , of what force it is . a multitude of sinnes ; and where there is loue , there is God ; and he euermore plentifully dwelleth in those hearts by his holy Spirit , where Charitie and mercy aboundeth . All things , with it , haue life and being ; without it , dye , and come to nothing . For , neither the gift of Prophecie , nor the vnderstanding of Mysteries , nor the knowledge of God , no nor Faith it selfe , without charitie , is any thing at all , but is all as nothing . To loue my neighbour , as I loue my selfe , is of all other , the richest and the greatest Sacrifice ; because it is offred vp in To loue our neighbour , is a great Sacrifice . the Temple of the euer-liuing God . And the merit is as great ( through the mercy of our Sauiour Iesus Christ ) to be truly sensible of our brothers miserie and vndoing ; as is the pleasure that we take , that our selues should bee saued .

Charitie is the end of the Commandements , it is the only marke , whereat The charitable man is fauoured of God . the precepts of the Law doe shoot . And hee that shall be charitable , shall finde the Lord mercifull vnto him in the day of his tryall . And because without God , we are not able to merit any thing of our selues , and for that Charitie is the gift of God , it is very fit and necessarie , that we should begge it at his hands with teares , and doe workes worthy the obtaining of it , moystning with those precious drops , the great drought that we suffer in our soules , and mollifying there with the hardnesse of our hearts , that they may bring forth the fruits of good Workes , which are the effects of a true and liuely faith . For , the humble and contrite spirit shall neuer be forsaken , but God will rather still succour and supply him with his grace , bestowing his best fauours vpon him , and inriching him with many notable and knowne benefits .

And albeit Riches ( being so neere a neighbour as it is vnto Pride ) be an occasion of Vice , weakning , and infeebling those our other Vertues , though it bee dangerous to it's Owner ; though it be a tyrannizing Lord , and a trayterous Slaue ; yet notwithstanding it is of the nature of Sugar , which hath this condition Riches , compared to Sugar . and propertie belonging vnto it , that ( if it be sweet and good , and hath not lost his fauour ) with warme things , it warmeth and giueth heat , and with cold things , it cooleth and refresheth . To the rich , it serues as an Instrument and meanes ( by the helping hand of Charitie ) to buy eternall blessednesse . And that man shall be charitable , and truely rich , who making the poore man rich , shall make himselfe , of a rich man , poore . For thereby , hee shall make the world to know , that hee is a true Disciple of his Sauiour Iesus Christ .

I stood one day in the outward Court of a Cardinals house , hard by the Porch , closely wrapt and muffled vp in a great Russet Cloake , iust of the same What manner of Cloake Guzman had ? colour as it came from the Sheepes backe , without any other Dye in the world : which was so full of Patches , one clapt vpon another , which I had sowne so of purpose , that ( where it had least ) it was no lesse then of three threds , so that you could not at all , or very hardly discerne the ground of it 's owne true colour . It was as hard and as stiffe as any boord , and for all weathers , farre better then your fastest Felt , or your closest-wrought Rugge , or any other frized cloth in the world ; for it was wondrous warme , and no ayre , water , nor cold would passe thorow it , and I was about to say ( please it you to excuse the excesse of the phrase ) that no arrow was able to pierce it .

Whilst I was thus waiting , there comes mee in a Cauallero to visit the Cardinall , seeming both by his Person , and his Attendants , to bee a Gentleman of principall ranke and quality . Who , when he saw mee standing there in this manner , thought verily with himselfe , that I was sicke of an Ague , and that I had then my cold fit vpon me : when as indeed the cause that I lookt so pittifull was , that I had layen there in the Porch the night before ; and because it was winter time , and that the ayre was fresh , and the winde blew cold , I was willing to keep me where I was , till the day had aduanced it selfe a little more forward .

He look't earnestly vpon me , and after he had well view'd me , he stood still , A Gentleman sees Guzman , he lookes vpon him , pi●…es ●…im , giues him an almes , and praiseth God . and beckned me vnto him . I sneak't out my head , when I came neere vnto him , and being amazed on the sudden , and much astonished , to see a man of his worth approche so neere vnto ●…ee , my countenance did come and goe , and began strangely to change and alter it selfe , not knowing why , or wherefore , or what should be the cause of this sudden alteration .

He ( good Gentleman ) thought that I did shake and tremble , and kindely said vnto me ; Put on thy Hat , my Boy , put on , I say , and couer thy head ; God comfort thee , and send thee well : And with that putting his hand into his pocket , he tooke out all that he had , which was a matter of some thirteene Royals and a halfe , and gaue them mee . I tooke them , and was so rauished therewith , that I was almost beside my selfe , as well in regard of the liberalnesse of the Almes , as to see how he went away from me , lifting vp his eyes vnto heauen .

And , I verily beleeue , that he said to himselfe , as he went along ; Let ( O Lord ) the Angels blesse thee , and all those Courtiers , that wait on thee in thy A worthy consideration . heauenly Kingdome ; Let all the spirits of heauen praise and magnifie thy holy name , for men doe not know how to honour thee , they are rude and ignorant creatures . O Lord , how much am I bound vnt thee ! that I beeing made of no better metall then this poore man , and perhaps borne of no better bloud then he , should sleepe and take my rest in my soft bed whilest he is forced to lye on the hard ground ; should goe thus well clad as I doe , whilest he remaines naked , and comfortlesse ; should be thus rich , as I am , and hee so poore ; that I should be sound , and he sicke ; I admitted , and he despised : And whereas thou mightst ( by exchanging only of our places ) haue bestow'd all that vpon him , which thou hast conferr'd on me ; Yet ( O Lord ) thou hast been pleased to deale otherwise with me ; and thou thy selfe best knowest why , and wherefore . Saue me ( sweet Iesu ) by that precious bloud , which thou sheddest for my sinnes . For this shall be my true riches , to lay fast hold vpon thee : for hauing thee , I haue all things ; and not hauing thee , I haue nothing . I say , that this Gentleman knew very well how to imploy those Talents , which God had put into his hands ; not considering so much to whom he gaue , as for whose sake he gaue . Looking well vpon me , and looking well into himselfe , weighing my wretched , and his happy condition , he gaue me all that he had , with a franke hand , and a free heart ; the one being as full of bounty , as the other of compassion .

Such good soules as these , did ( in the exercising of their Charity ) gaine heauen by our hands , and we ( wicked Villaines ) haue lost it by theirs ; since , through To begge without need , may get vs money , but lose 〈◊〉 heauen . the greedy desire that we haue to receiue , being still crauing & begging when we haue no need , we rob those thereof that are in true want , suffering this Vice of ours to vsurpe vpon anothers Office . We went still full gorg'd , greater gluttons and drunkards the world did not affoord ; our sides were ready to cracke with gurmandizing , and our braines to burst with bowzing ; your Senators of Rome could not liue more merrily then we did , for wee were as tall trencher-men , and as good Epicures as the best of them . And albeit we are not so much respected , nor liue not in that repute and esteeme as they doe ; yet our manner of life hath a great deale more ease in it , and I am sure , a great deale lesse trouble .

And we haue besides two such Priuiledges , as none of them all , no not the best man in Rome hath the like . The one is a kinde of liberty that wee haue The great priuiledges belonging vnto Beggers . in begging , yet neuerthelesse doe not loose our liberty , which is not so with your better sort of men . For misery hath no greater misery with it , then when a man is forced to be beholding to such or such a friend to succour and relieue his wants , though this helpe should come from the free hand of his owne naturall brother . For hee buyes at a deare rate , that receiues this kindnesse ; and farre more dearely does he sell , who giues to him that is of a thankefull nature . And if on this point of begging , I might boldly speake my opinion , it is the worstmis fortune , that can befall a poore mans life , when he once comes to be driuen to beg out of meere necessity . For although it be freely giuen , yet the very crauing therof doth cost him much . Moreouer , I shal tell thee what is the cause , that begging doth so much vexe a man , and why it goes so much against his stomake , which is ; That man beeing a perfect reasonable Why it grieues a mans heart to begge . creature , like vnto God himselfe ( as himselfe saith ) for when he was to make man ( the most blessed Trinity assisting at that Creation ) God said ; Let vs make Man after our owne Image and likenesse . ( And I could also tell thee , how this is to be vnderstood , but it is not proper for this time and place . ) Well , Man was made , and comming forth into the world , we are all of vs naturally inclined Man , whereunto he is inclined . to deifie our selues , seeking as much as in vs lyeth , to come neere vnto God ; nay , ( if it were possible ) to be gods . And with this thirst , we still grow dryer and dryer ; and with this hunger , waxe weaker and weaker .

We see , that God created all things : we would faine doe the like . And seeing we can not doe it , as his diuine Maiestie did , of nothing , we would doe it of something , as farre forth as our ability hath power to stretch , seeking to conserue indiuidua Specierum , the indiuiduals of euery Species , or seuerall kinds vpon earth . The bruit beasts in the Fields ; the Fishes , in the Waters ; the Plants , in the Earth : And so euery thing in it's nature , that is in the world . He beheld those workes , which he had made with his owne hands , and they seemed to him very good , as proceeding from those blessed and powerfull hands of his . He tooke delight in looking vpon them , for they were made to his minde . This passeth currant at this day , as it is set downe in the letter . And we likewise are desirous to doe , or at least to counterfet the like ; striuing to imitate him all that we may .

How well doe I like that Bird , that I haue bred vp in mine owne house ? That Lambe , which hath beene reared in mine owne Farme ? That Tree , Euery man loues his owne . which hath been planted in mine owne Orchard ? That Flower , which hath sprung vp in mine owne Garden ? What comfort doe I take in looking vpon them ? how does it ioy me , to see them to thriue and prosper ? Insomuch , that what my selfe haue not bred , made , or planted with mine own hands , although it be otherwise very good in it selfe , I wil not stick to pluck it vp by the roots , & cast it away from me , & neuer grieue therat , it shal neuer trouble me : wheras that , which is the work of mine own hands ; the deare child of my industry ; the fruit of my labours , though it be not so good as the other ; yet because it is my own handy-work , I like it , & I loue it . From my neighbours or my friends Tree , I will not onely take away the Flower , and the fruit , but I will not so much as leaue a leafe , or a sprigge therevpon , and if I haue a minde thereunto , I will not greatly care to cut it downe to the ground . But if it be mine owne , and that I haue planted it with mine owne hands , it would grieue my very soule , if I should finde but a Pism●…re , or a Caterpiller vpon it , to doe it any hurt , or to see a Bird but to p●…cke at it ; and all because it is mine . In a word , we doe all of vs loue our owne workes . And so , in wishing well vnto them , I am like to him that made me , and haue it from him by inheritance .

The like is true in all other actions . It is very proper in God to giue ; and Gods great●…esse , and mans basenesse . very improper , to craue . Vnlesse , when he requireth something of vs for our owne good . For that which he asketh of vs , it is not for himselfe , neither hath he any need thereof ; for he is Remedium totius necessitatis : The onely relieuer of all o●…r wants , and the onely satisfier of the hungry . He hath much , and therefore is able to giue much ; and nothing can be wanting vnto him . He doth communicate and impart vnto all according to their seuerall necessities , easilier then thou canst take water out of the Sea , and with a farre larger hand ; so great an in equalitie is there betwixt thy misery , and his mercy .

We would likewise be like to him in this : He made me according to his owne likenesse , and I ought accordingly to be like vnto him ; euen as the thing instamp●…d ought to be like vnto the Stampe . How mad , how eager , how desirous and how foolishly are we all bent vpon giuing ? The Couetous , the sauing ●…n the Rich , the Vsurer , the Begger , all doe keepe and hoord vp for to giue . But the most of these men vnderstand least ( as I told you before ) when they are to giue , for they doe not giue , till they be dead . If thou aske these men , why they masse vp money , and why in their life-time they bury it vnder ground , and to what end they doe it ? Some will answere thee , that they lay it vp for their heires ; others , for their soules ; others , that they may leaue something behinde them , and all of them sure that they carry none of it away with them Thou seest then , how they are willing to giue and how out of its due time and season ; like an vntimely birth , which comes not to perfection . But in the end , this is our end , this our desire .

How God like does a man finde himselfe , when with a generous minde To ●…aue w●…ewith to 〈◊〉 , 〈◊〉 a great 〈◊〉 to a man . he hath wherewith to giue , and doth giue ? How sweet and pleasing is his hand vnto him ; how cheer●…full his countenance ; how quiet his heart ; how contented his Soule ? His gray haires are remoued ; his bloud is refreshed ; his life is inlarged . And ( questionles ) so much the more , by how much he knows , that he hath ability to do it , & is not afraid that he shall euer want . If wee be willing therefore to doe that , which he did ; ( for so did he with vs ) let vs take as much pleasure to giue , as it would grieue vs at the heart to aske .

And those , towards whom Gods hand hath beene so franke and liberall . A r●…ble spirit cannot begge . and hauing made them ( which likewise is another particular gift of his ) of a noble minde , if they finde themselues oppressed with want , and depriued of these their worldly goods , they will rather indure any misery whatsoeuer , then begge of another to relieue their wretched estates .

These are the men , of whom there is great pittie to be had , and these the What kinde of almes is nobly bestowd . whole world ought to relieue with a full hand . For by this it is knowne , who does them friendship , and shewes them any kindenesse , when seeing them in necessitie , they succour them , before they craue their helpe . For , if they should be put to that push , and be driuen to sue vnto them , they will neither giue , nor lend them . It is a debt which they pay them , and yet put it forth to Vsurie with aduantage . This is a friend indeed , which succours his friend in time of need : And this I call succour , * * The Spanish phrase , Esse ●…amo socorro , con el que corro . A poore begger , to whom he may be compared . when I concurre and run along with him . It becomes me to giue , but beseemes not him to aske . I am to runne equall fortunes with him . I must keepe an euen pace with him , neither be too farre behinde him , nor too much before him .

If I haue entertained thee too long in this subiect , and haue not giuen thee satisfaction , pardon my ignorance , and accept my good will . So that the libertie of crauing , is permitted only to the poore ; And in this we are equall with Kings and Princes , whose particular priuiledge it is , to demaund Subsedies , and Ayde-money , which is no basenesse in them , howsoeuer it may be in others . But the difference is , that Kings craue of the Commons , for the Common good , and for to supply their necessarie occasions ; But the poore , for themselues only , out of an euill custome , which they haue gotten .

That other Priuiledge , which I told you of , is that of the fiue Senses . Who is he now adaies in the world , that with larger licence , and freer libertie doth The libertie of the fiue Senses , by whom most inioyed . inioy them , then the poore man , or with greater securitie , or more content ? Who doth so thorowly and so feelingly taste them as he ? And because I haue named the word Taste , I will begin first with that .

There is not that pot , which we doe not skimme ; nor that meat , which wee doe not proue ; nor that banquet , wherein wee haue not a share . The Taste . Whither did that poore man euer come , that the house that deny'd him to day , did not giue him to morrow ? He runnes thorow all mens houses , hee begs of them all , and he tastes of all : and he is best able to say , which house hath the best meat , and the best drest .

For the Hearing ; Who heares more then the poore man doth ? For being The Hearing . dis-interessed in all kinde of things , none are iealous that hee should heare them ; in the open streets , in priuate houses , in publike Churches , in the Market-place , and in euery place , euery man treats freely of his businesse , without any suspition of him , though the matter be neuer so important . Sleeping besides a nights , vpon some bulke or stall in the streets , what musicke haue they bestowed vpon them , which we heare not ? What Loue-tricks are they priuy to , which we know not ? Nothing is kept secret from such poore beggerly Rascals as we bee . And for publike affaires , we haue by a thousand parts better intelligence , then all the world besides . For we heare that treated of in more parts , then all men else besides put all together .

For your seeing likewise : how freely may we inioy it , without being noted ? nor aske vs the question why we gaze vpon them , nor offer to hinder vs from The Seeing . looking here , or looking there . How often haue I accused and condemned my selfe , when begging in the Church , mine eye hath beene wandring and rouing about ? and chuckt and hugg'd my selfe , with the delight and pleasure that I haue taken therein ? Or to speake downe-right English , and to declare my selfe more plainely , feeding mine eyes greedily on those Angelicall faces of your finest Ladyes , whose Louers did not dare to looke vpon them for feare of being noted : all which was freely permitted vnto vs .

For matter of smelling ; Who can smell better then we , who are called by the name of Smell-Feasts ? Besides , if any smell bee so much the better , by The Smelling . how much it is the more profitable ; to vs , our owne Amber , and our owne Muske , is better and truer then all the rest , which is a cloue of Garlicke , which ordinarily we neuer goe without ; as being a Preseruatiue against all contagious corruption whatsoeuer . And if we be desirous of any other odours , we then get vs to the corner of some one street or other , where these things are commonly sold , and there we satisfie our sense of smelling with the sweet perfume of Ierkins , and of Gloues , some ciuited , and some powdred , that are there laid out for show , till the dust and powder of them come flying into our eyes , and our nostrils .

Will you happely say , that the sense of Touching is wanting vnto vs ? And The Touching . that neuer any good thing came yet to our hands ? Lament your ignorance . What such difference I pray , is there betwixt pouertie and beautie ? Wee poore beggers touch and handle as good ware as the rich , and inioy as prettie Commo●…ties ; but all men doe not vnderstand this Mysterie . There be some poore men , which for all their beggerie and pouertie , maintaine such a handsome Doxy as many a gre●…t rich man woul●… be glad to inioy with all his heart . And yet she had rather haue this poore man , that doth truly pay her her Tribute , and is not wanting vnto her in his loue , then a rich man , that shall defame , and misuse her . And how often haue some women giuen mee an almes with their owne hand ( I know not what others haue done ) but I out of my youth , would make bold to take hold of hers with mine ; and in a kinde of deuout acknowledgement , would neuer let it goe , till I had kist it ?

But these are but toyes to speake of , and meere fooleries , but aboue all these things the taste , the sight , smelling , hearing , and touching , the chiefest and truest of all the fiue Senses , put them all together , was that of those ruddy cheeks of your golden Ruddoc●…s your Spanish Pistolets , your plum●… and fulfac't Portuguse , and your cleere-skinn'd pieces of eight of Castile , which we kept secret to our selues , and did priuately inioy in a plentifull manner ; For to haue them , for to pay them away is not to inioy them ; To inioy them , is To haue money , to pay it againe away , is not the inioying of money . to haue them lying by vs . hauing no other need of them , then to vse them for the cleering of the eye sight , and the comforting of our senses . Howbeit , some sticke not to say , 〈◊〉 , nuncase goza , hasta que se gasta . That he inioyes not his money , that does not spend it . These we did carry about with vs , sewing them in some patches of our doublets neere vnto the heart , and as close to the skinne , as we could handsomely quilt them in , holding them to be restoratiue . There was not anyone piece of a patch about vs , were it neuer so soule and neuer so vile , which was not worth a reasonable good sute of cloathes . We were all flush and f●…ll of gold ; For , hauing our dyet gratis , and feeding on free cost , the money which we got , we neuer spent . And as the Prouerbe is ; Esse te rizo v●…o , que te hizo el pico ; He made thee rich , who Prouerb . Petit à petit l'offeau faict son nid . gaue thee whereon to picke . And grano à grano , hincha la gallina el Papa . Graine after graine , the Hen fils her craw . We grew many of vs to increase our Talent , till it came to a good round summe , where with many an honest man might haue lifted his feet from the ground , & not haue stucke in the mire . Rest thy selfe a while in this Inne ; for in that our iourney , which we are to make to the Chapter following , you 〈◊〉 all heare what hapned in Florence to a poore man that died there , of the same time and standing with my selfe . Wherein you shall know , whether our Touching be not as good as other mens .

CHAPTER V.

Guzman de Alfarache discourseth of the quality of mens Consciences , and recounteth what hapned in his time to a notable Rogue , and famous begger in Florence , who at his death made the great Duke his heire . Hee treats of the ambitious man ; And deliuers in the end , how he was thrust out of Gaeta for his counterfeiting .

IT is a very ordinary thing with your poorer sort of people , to become Plotters and Contriuers , watching night and day , and beating their braines , to seeke out some poore meanes how to liue , that they may not goe a begging from doore to doore , and still to lie ( like Lazarus ) at rich mens gates for reliefe , and yet starue perhaps in the end for want of a morsell of bread . This euery where befalls poore folkes . They ( poore soules ) are put to their shifts . And albeit it be said ; that in matter of cruelty , Italy beares the bell ; and in Italy , those more particularly that are in , and about Genoa ; yet I am not of beliefe , that the fault lies so much in The proudest , and hardest-harted people in Italy , are your Genoueses . the soyle of that place , as in the necessitie , and couetousnesse of the people . I meane those , that are of the right stampe , your miserable and hard-hearted Vsurers , whom they that are the natiue Citizens , and naturall Inhabitants of those parts , call by way of Nick-name , Moros blancos , white Moores . Now they , to reuenge themselues of them , and to returne it a a The Spanish phrase is , Echarles las cabras . Now , Echar las cabras , is ; when many hauing plaid together , who should win or lose , when they did rifle for any thing , there should be two losers , and that they might not part or deuide , but that one should pay all , and the other scape scot-free , they returne againe to play . And this they cal Echar las cabras . Alluding to that which shepheards vse to doe , when they make a merry-meeting , and ha●…e kill'd some Goats to make a feast , who play who shall pay for all , laying the losse vpon the two last . Couarruuias . Verbe Cabra . Conscience lost by whom , and how ? home vpon them againe , say , Que quien descubre la b b Alcauala is a Tribute , Taxe , Tole , or Subsedi●… . The common people haue a tale , That King Don Alonso the Wise , holding a Parliament at Burgos , said vnto the Procurators , Dadme gente , delque v●…la . And from thence comes Alcauala , A supply of monies , which they gaue him . alcauala , esse la paga . Let him pay the toll , that first inuented it . For this was not ( say they ) spoken of them , nor is it so to be vnderstood ; but of those great Dealers and Negociators of Genoa , who carrie their consciences in torne pockets , that are ript and vnsewed , whereby they quickly come to be lost , and scarce one amongst them all , that hath a good and a sound conscience . But one said , that this was not so , but would needs fetch the water a little farther off , that should driue this Mill ; And therefore ( said he ) it was thus : That when the Genoueses send forth their children to schoole , they carry their consciences along with them , there at first they begin to play with them , then to wrangle and fall out about them ; some forgetting that euer they brought any thither with them ; and others ( hauing lost them there at play ) leaue them behinde them , and neuer thinke on them after .

Now , when the schoole comes to be swept , and these Consciences be found againe , they giue them to the Master , who carefully laies them vp in a Chest , and there locks them vp close , that they may no more be lost . And hee that hereafter shall haue need of one ( if he can call to minde where he either left it , or laid it aside ) he were best goe seeke it out himselfe , to see if he can light on the right one .

Now , because the Schoole-master hath the keeping of so many , and so mixed one amongst another , that he doth not know which is which , he giues him that which comes first to hand , and so the party goes away with it , thinking verily that it is his owne Conscience , that he carries thus away with him , when as indeed it is not his , but either his friends Conscience , or his kinsmans , or some one or other of his acquaintance . And hence it comes to passe , that no man , bearing his owne Conscience in his owne bosome , euery man lookes and pries into that of another mans . And euer since that time , hath this ill report runne of them .

O Spaine , Spaine , my beloued Countrey , Faith's true keeper , God vphold thee with his hand : And as thou hast much of this in thee ; so likewise , thou hast thy Schoole-Masters too , that truck one conscience for another ; and men , as well as they , that hauing chopt consciences , goe away well contented , presuming all is right and streight , and that that which they haue is their owne .

How many forgetfull of themselues , busie themselues in those things , which Wholesome lessons for our Consciences . appertaine not vnto them ? How vnaduisedly reprehend , sollicite , and censure another mans conscience ? My friend , this ought not to bee so ; Looke well into thy selfe , with-draw this chopping and changing : First , throughly examine thine owne , doe not seeke for a mote in another mans eye , till thou hast pull'd the beame out of thine owne : and then thou wilt tell me another tale .

That which thou thinkest is a discharge to thy conscience , is a meere iest , To let other mens consciences alone , and to looke into our owne . and an idle toy , & therin thou doest but put a iest vpon thy selfe . Do not cloake thy sinne ( thou Vsurer ) saying ; Such a one is a greater Vsurer then I am : Nor seeke to excuse thy selfe , by saying ; Such a man is a worse thiefe then my selfe . Meddle not thou with another mans conscience ; let that alone , and looke well into thine owne . This is that which concernes thee ; This is that which imports thee most . Let euery man put that away from him , that is not his owne ; and wherewith he hath nothing to doe . Let him not meddle nor make with it . Let him not settle his eyes vpon other mens sins , but cast them aside off . For it is neither the Idolatry of Salomon , nor the Sacriledge of Iudas , that shall excuse the like in thee : But euery man shall beare his owne burthen , and receiue such punishment , as his owne sinne hath deserued . Why doest thou incline , and leane vnto that , which is not onely ill , but also hurtfull vnto thee ? Why doest thou not rather imitate that , which is good , and vertuous ? following the example of him that fasteth , confesseth , communicateth , repenteth him of his sinnes , and performeth many other actions of holinesse , and of a good and honest life ? Is he peraduenture more man then thou art ? Thou forbearest ( like him that is sicke ) to take that , which should cure thy sicknesse , and doe thee good ; and feedest on that , which impaireth thy health and doth thee hurt . I therefore assure thee , and giue thee my honest word , that it will make much for thy saluation , acordarte de ti , y oluidarte de mi , to forget me , and to thinke on thy selfe .

Amongst those many Schooles for little children , and those many Schoole-Masters , Seuill , of all other Cities , the richest for Consciences . which haue the keeping of Consciences , ( howbeit , as I say , no City , Towne , nor Village escapes them in all the world ) Seuill is the onely place for my money ; and therein , those that imbarke themselues to passe the Seas . For , the most part of them , as if their Consciences , were of that great burthen and extraordinary weight , that they were able to sinke both the Ship and themselues , do●…ither leaue their consciences at home in their own houses , or with their Hosts , to keepe them for them till their returne . And if afterwards they chance to recouer them againe , ( which in my opinion is a hard matter , for that the Countrey is very spacious and large , where there is no such great reckoning made of these things ) it is well and good ; if not , they doe not greatly care ; or if they take them with them , and leaue them there behinde them , as little , if not lesse . And for this reason , Conscience goes a begging in that Citie , in regard of the great store and plenty of that commodity ; because those that left them there behinde them , when they went away to the Indies , or some other farre place , did neuer returne backe againe to fetch them .

I will not offer to walke in the Exchange , nor the Burse , nor haue any thing to doe in the street of San Françisco , nor hazzard a drowning in the Sea . Let all trafficke ( for my part ) be laid aside ; Let there be no trade driuen , no commerce had , no buying nor selling , nor exchanging of commodities . For I feare me , if I should once begin to be a dealer therein , I should neuer be able to giue it ouer . But let me heare make a full point , taking this onely as but a note by the way , and not thinke so much on what I say , as what I would haue said , and shall perhaps say hereafter when I see my time . And so I will proceed to my promised Story .

There was a certaine man , that was borne neere vnto Genoa , a person of The Story of Pantalon , Casteleto , a Genouese , and poore Begger in Florence . great account , for his rare inuention , and subtlenesse of wit . His name was Pantalon Casteleto , a poore Begger , who , for that he was married in Florence , and his Wife had borne him a sonne , after that the Mother was deliuered of this child , the Father went plotting and deuising , how hee might leaue him well to liue , without tying him to serue any man , or to binde him prentice to any trade or occupation .

It is commonly spoken there amongst them by way of Prouerbe : a a Dichoso el hijo , que tiene à su padre en el infierno . De malè quae . sitis , vix gaudet tertius haeres . Happy is that sonne , whose father goes to Hell . Howbeit , I count him vnhappy . For it is not possible , that should thriue with him , which he left him , nor that it should come to the inioying of a third Heire . This is my opinion . For , to leaue his child well prouided for , he prouides ill for himselfe ; and to make him , marres himselfe . For he can not but runne his soules hazzard , who hunts after vngodly gaine .

And albeit he were married , and had the charge of a Wife , ( but this is a particular benefit , and a large Theame to treat of , that one Begger should marry with another , and be both of one profession ) they had ( God be thanked ) reasonable well wherewithall to liue ; they wanted nothing , that they had need of , and sufficient store of wealth they had besides , to leaue vnto their heire , in some competent measure , especially for one , that was of so meane a condition as he was .

But this man would not put himselfe vpon Fortune . But had intertained The cruelty of a Father . in his imagination , one of the greatest and most vnnaturall cruelties , that the wit of man could deuise . He maimes me this his poore innocent Infant , ( as many more of all Nations doe in those parts : ) where , when they beyong and tender , they writhe their ioynts , and breake their bones , making them as plyable as Waxe ; then taking them in hand anew , molding them after this , or that manner , as they haue most minde vnto , forming and fashioning of them ( I know not ) into how many monstrous shapes , and vgly postures , onely to moue the people to take the more pitie and compassion of them .

With these abused Babes , whilest they are little , they get where-withall to line in their old age ; and afterwards , thus maymed and mangled as you see , they leaue them a good patrimonie . But this wicked Rogue , for his greater increase of gaine , would martyrize this poore tender Infant , with new kinde of torments ; He did not put him to these cruell tortures all at once ; but still as he grew in yeeres , so did he vary and change them , as men shift their Shirts , or change their Bathes , one dry , and the other wet ; till he had left him thus carued and ingrauen , as I haue painted him forth vnto you .

Some naturall gifts hee had , that his father either did not , or could not touch . So that notwithstanding this his vnhappinesse , hee had a very happy wit , and was a good Speaker , and his words became him very well . But that which he had from his Father , which was his outward flesh , to begin first with his head , he had writh'd it in that sort , that it seemed to bee set quite backwards , his face falling on t 'one side vpon his right shoulder . That both beneath , and aboue the lids of his eyes , was all one ouer-growne lumpe of flesh : the fore-head and the eye-browes scorch't and burned with a thousand wrinkles : He was crooke-back't , his whole body like a Bottom of Yarne , all one lumpe , without any shape or fashion , of any one part , that might stile him man : His feet turned backwards , and perching vp ouer his shoulders , being dis-ioynted , and withered . The onely sound parts that were about him , were his armes , and his tongue . The one left him to talke , the other to take . He went , as if he had beene clapt into a Cage , being thrust into a little kinde of woodden Chest , set and made fast to a little Asses backe , which he did rule and guide with his hands ; saue that to get vp or downe , he was faine still to seeke for some helpe , which he did seldome or neuer misse of , hauing one or other euer at hand for that purpose .

He was , ( as I told you before ) a pleasant conceited fellow , had a good wit of his owne , and many good things should you heare to come from him . Besides , he went so totter'd , so torne , and in that ragged and wretched manner , that all Florence tooke pitie of him , and as well for his pouerties sake , as for those good parts that were in him , they gaue him much Almes , wherewith he was well relieued .

After this manner , he liued some seuenty and two yeeres , or much thereabouts , at the end whereof he fell into a grieuous sicknesse , whereof hee certainly knew , that he should dye .

Seeing himselfe at this point , and that he now stood vpon the iumpe of his Saluation , or Condemnation ; being ( as he was ) very discreet , hee began to consider a little better of the matter , thinking with himselfe , that it was no time now to iest , but rather to confesse his sinnes , and to send for the Pa●…son of the Parish and to make his Will. Which as it was to be the last that euer he was to make so was he carefull to make it as strong & as good as the strength of his wit could deuise . He desired , that a knowne Confessor of his might be sent for ; one , that was a very learned man , & in very good esteeme , as well for the honesty of his life and conuersation , as for his learning and manners . With him he treated touching his sinnes , and fully imparted his minde vnto him . And when he had communicated what he thought fit vnto him , hee was very desirous to haue his Will made , but with the shortest , and most compendious words , that possibly could be imagined . And the beginning being drawne , ( which belonged to the publike Notary to doe ) what was fit on his part , he briefely thus sets it downe .

Inprimi●… , I recommend my Soule vnto God , who created it , and my body to the earth , to be buried in mine owne Parish . Pantalons last will and Testament . The Duke made his sole heir●… and Executor .

Item , My Will is , that my Asse be sold ; which money shall bee bestowed vpon my buriall . But the Pack-Saddle I bequeath vnto the great Duke my Lord and Master , to whom it rightly appertaineth , and properly belongs , whom I nominate to be my sole Executor , and make my generall and vniuersall Heire .

This done after that he had settled and sealed this his last Will and Testament of that his indisposition anon after he dyed . And because euery man Pantalon dy●… . held him to be a merry-conceited fellow , and one that was full of his witty iests , they did all verily thinke , that he would make his death equall with his life , and shut vp his last breath with some odde iest or other for a farewell , as it vsually befals such kinde of giddy-headed fooles , when they once take a toy in the head , and are wedded to their humour .

But when the great Duke vnderstood of this Will , ( which was not long kept from his knowledge ) hauing formerly heard of the Testator , and that he was held to be a wise and discreet man , he did from thence collect , that this The Duke sends for 〈◊〉 Legacy . Clause was not without it's mysterie . Wherevpon hee gaue order that this Legacy he had left him , should forthwith be brought vnto the Palace , and when he had it before him he comman led it to be ript in sunder , piece after piece , and still as they went along , they tooke forth diuers different sorts of coyne ; and when they had sorted out these seuerall kindes of moneys ( which were all in good gold ) they amounted in the whole to three thousand and sixe hundred Spanish Crownes , euery Crowne bearing the full value of foure hundred Marauedis . This poore man , whether he had consulted with his Confessor or no , I know not ; or aduised with himselfe , which is not vnlikely ; It seemed he thought with himselfe , that that was none of his , and that hee had no other meanes to make restitution , then to leaue it to the naturall Lord of that Signorie , who had the charge of all the poore committed to his care , and with this he conceiued he had discharged his Conscience . The great Duke being so powerfull and so noble a minded Prince as he was , gaue order to haue this Will entred , and to remaine vpon record to after-ages , and that the Legacie that he had giuen him , should be imployed for the good of his soules health ; Wherein he shew'd himselfe a worthy Executor , but a farre more worthy Gentleman .

What say you now to the feeling of this poore Begger ? What thinke you of his sense of Touching ? Thine is farre short of it , nor halfe so good and delightfull as this , though thou shouldest inioy the imbracements of another Uenus . Of these two Priuiledges ( before specified ) we were the sole and only Lords , for none besides vs , did inioy them so freely , as we did ; together with many other liberties and immunities which ( if I list ) I were able to relate vnto thee .

When I doe but thinke vpon those times , which I inioyed heretofore , and the merry life that I then led , which is all now past and gone with me , ( not that i either long or looke for any more such happy dayes or that I would call them to minde , to make me forget my miseries , ) or whether the recordation of them did make those sorrowes seeme either greater or lesse , which I suffred in the Gallies , I will not now dispute ; but sure I am , that I take great delight in the remembrance of them : As that hauing of our Table still prouided for vs ; our bed ready made to our hands ; our Chamber without incombrance ; our Scrip well furnish'd ; our goods about vs ; our stocks sure on foot , without feare of theeues , or any dread of raine , without Aprill's care , or May's fearfull iealousie , which two are the husband-mans moth : Not troubling our heads with new fashions , with the pompe of apparell , with ceremonious complements , and the like froth of fooleries , scum'd out of forraine Countries : Liuing without the preuention of flatteries , without the composing of Lies , scorning to get either money , or to seeke to grow into credit by such base insinuations .

How would we suffer that men might the better esteeme of vs ? How visit Artifices to winne Opinion . them , that they might not forget vs ? How attend them , for to binde them vnto vs ? What occasions would we not seeke out , that we might come to speake with them , and be seene by them ? How early would we be stirring , to the end they might thinke we were carefull and sollicitous how to liue ? And euermore the more early vp , the colder and sharper the weather was . And euery one of these had it's pleasure and delight , for the ends for which they were done .

How often would my selfe fall a discoursing of other mens houses and their gentilitie , only of purpose to set my owne I edigree afoot , and to shew that I was a Gentleman well descended ? How often would I discouer another mans defect , and finde fault with it , and only to this end , that by taxing such a vice in another , I might be thought to be free from the same my selfe ? How often would I hold conuersation , only for ostentations sake , and no other end in the world ? How would I wheele about , and fetch in things a farre off , only to vent my wit , and to make my words to take place ? To what good meetings did not I goe ? I was the only Cocke there that crow'd low dest ; and when I went away from them , and left their companie , they would not censure me , as I would them , but let me alone .

O these conuenticles of lewd Company , these meetings , where mens mouthes fall a murmuring and traducing of others ! ô how large a Historie would it require ? Who is able to expresse , how ill it beseemes a Gentleman , to be the Taylour that must cut out such ill worke ? There is no Clergie man , whose a a The Spanish word is Loba : that i●… , Vestidura clerical , ●…alar , que llega al suelo , cortada à todo ruedo con golpes para sacar los braços . Es vesti●…ura honorifica . Este vso se conserua en la Capilla real . Han le dado varias ●…mologias , y ●…ntre las d●…mas , vna , que por comer tanta tela , la llamaron , Loba . P●…rò su ●…timologia trae Origen del nombre Gri●…go 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 genero de vestidura , quae hominem ambit , vt cortex , & tunica arbo●…em . y puede ser Hebreo , del verbo labas , induere y as●…i Valdra , indumen●…m . Couarruuias . Surplice they will not cut ; Nor honest woman , whose b b The Spanish word is , Saya , which is that garment , which a wom●…n weares from 〈◊〉〈◊〉 downeward . The 〈◊〉ed condition of Pretenders . Guzman playes the 〈◊〉 in Gaeta . 〈◊〉 . Kirtle they will not make a hole in . They cloath the Saint and the sinner after a large kinde of fashion . But let it rest as it is ; if we liue , we shall be seru'd with the like sawce . By how straight a Rule , by how euen a Line , and by how iust a Compasse , must that Pretender carry himselfe , who is to saile thorow the sea of this world , hoping for a fortune from another mans hand ? If it be good , how slowly doth it come ? if bad , how soone doth it light vpon vs ? And the Scale can neuer be made so vpright and euen , but that there will be something wanting of it's true weight . And the better a man deserues , often-times hee fares the worse . If a man haue not a minde to do●…-him good , euery Mole-hill is made a mountaine , and euery the least obliquitie , is obserued and noted in him . If he speake much , ( though neuer so well , ) he is too lauish of his words ; If little , he is too short and obscure , and knowes not how to expresse himselfe . If of high and dainty things indeed , he is too rash , and too presumptuous ; and vndertak●… to discusse those things , that are too deepe for his vnderstanding . If of things of lesser consequence , and of a lower straine , he is too shallow , and hath no stuffe in him . If he humble himselfe , he is base ; if stand vpon his worth , he is proud : if he will fight and take no wrong , hee is ill gouern'd , and a Royster ; if pocket a wrong , and hold his hands , he is a coward : if he haue a bold looke , he is impudent ; if a modest countenance , he is an hypocrite ; if he laugh , he is condemned of leuitie ; if graue , hee is counted a Saturnist : if affable , slightly regarded ; if austere , mightily abhorred : If iust , cruell ; if mercifull , a silly sheepe .

Now against all these and the like cauils ( which are no small misfortunes ) the poore haue a Passe-port , as being Lords of themselues , free from all taxes and tallage . They are out of the Gun-shot of their Competitors , they quietly inioy their life , without being troubled with Promooting Knaues to informe against them ; snipping Tailours to take them short ; or snarling dogs to snap at their good name .

Such was my happy condition , if Time and Fortune ( consumers of all things on earth , who suffer not things to continue in one and the selfe-same estate ) had not tumbled me downe from this height of my happinesse ; declaring by the colour of my countenance , and the Soundnesse of my limmes , that I was rich in health , and not so maymed , nor so poore , as I made my selfe to be , by my pitifull moanes and lam●…ntations .

For , as I was sitting one day a b●…gging of almes , in the Citie of Gaeta , hard by the Church porch , whither ( out of curiositie ) I would needs goe to see if their charitie and deuotion did equall that of Rome ? There I sate bare , made shew of my head vnto them , ( for I was but newly come thither , and had not as yet fitted my selfe with necessaries ) so that I was forced on the sudden to ●…ake vse of a kinde of scur●… , that I had clapt thereon ; in the counter feiting whereof , I was excellent cunning . The Gouernour of the Towne comming to Church , as he past along by me , casts his eye vpon me , & gaue me an almes . With this tricke , I past reasonable well for a while . But because , la Codiçia , 〈◊〉 sa●… , too much couetousnesse makes the bag to breake ; and I had not the wit to see when I was well ; I thought fitt vpon a Festiuall day to appeare in publike with some new inuention . I had my preparatiues ready , my prouision at hand , I set them before me , and then drest me such a legge , that was very well worth more , then a very good Vine-yard . This was the farme that I meant then to liue vpon .

Well , away goe I to Church with it ; there I began to stretch my throate , and to thunder out my voyce , euer and anon lifting vp the cloth with a tender finger , to shew vnto them , what a grieuous sore legge I had , wherein I was so ready and so perfect , that I had need of no body to teach me my lesson . But whether it were my ill lucke , or mine owne indiscretion , ( for from ignorance and foolishnesse , all your mischances for the most part proceed ) I cannot tell which to impu●…e it to : But certaine I am , I should not haue sought to haue eate better bread then is made of Wheat , nor haue gone a chopping of horses in so small a Village . I might haue kept me still to my scabbed head , and haue past well with it , ( for it found me meat to put in my mouth ) and not haue gone seeking after new tricks , and new inuentions .

The Gouernour came that day vnto the Church to heare Masse , and because he knew me , he will'd me to rise , saying vnto me : Come along with me , and The Gouernour of Gaeta cures Guzman of his sore legge , and how he did it . I will bestow a shirt on thee to put on thy backe . I did beleeue him , and went along with him to his Lodging . If I had but knowne before how he would haue vs'd me , he should not haue reach't me with the best Culuerine he had , nor haue made me to come within his clutches , with all his faire words , nor all the wit in his head . But when he had me there , and saw I was safe for getting from him , he lookt me steadily in the face , and said vnto me ; Thy colour being so fresh , thy skinne so cleere , thy body so sound ( for thou art fat plumpe , and faire , thy complexion good , thy limmes strong , and the rest of thy skinne smooth and sleeke ) how comes it to passe that this thy legge is as it is ? Me thinkes this doth not sute and hang well together with the rest .

I answered him , but with a troubled kinde of deliuery : Sir , I know not ; it hath pleased God it should be so . Presently he knew thereupon vpon what legge I halted , he had found me out ; whereupon I had an eye to the doore , to see if I could shew him my heeles , and get away from him . But I could not , for the doore was made fast . He wille●… a Surgeon to be sent for , that hee should search my wound , and see what I ayled . He came and lookt , and lookt vpon it againe and againe , and at last very leisurely and tenderly went to worke with me , with a soft and gentle hand , as neuer a Lady in the land could more handsomely haue gone about it . At the first it did somewhat puzzle him , for he knew not what to make of it , but within a little while after he saw his error , & then he told the Gouernour ; Sir , this Youth hath no more hurt in his legge , then I in mine eye ; and that you may perceiue it is so , I will plainely demonstrate it vnto you . With that he began to vnswathe me , and taking off ragge after ragge , and such slibber-slabbers as I had bedawbed it withall , he made my legge to appeare as whole as any fish , as indeed it was .

The Gouernour blest himselfe , and stood amazed to see me in that maner , but that which did astonish him most , was how I should haue the aptitude and wit to doe such a thing as this . I was in a trance , and ready to swoune , not knowing what either to say or doe . And if my youth had not borne me out , none but God could haue freed me from exemplary punishment .

But this youth of mine did reserue me for greater chastisement . And in stead of the shirt which hee promised mee , he sent for the Beadle of beggers , and there ( in his presence ) willed him to giue me a strip't Doublet , which I was to weare vnder that torne one which I had to my backe . Commanding me , that I should presently packe out of the Citie , and come there no more . Which command , though he had not layd it vpon me , I should haue beene carefull to see it performed my selfe ; for I would not haue stayd there , if he would haue made me Lord of Gaeta . I got me away full of feare , trembling and quaking , shrinking vp my shoulders , looking euer and anon behinde me , being iealous and suspicious , that if they should chance to bethinke themselues , that they had not giuen me sufficient paiment , they would make after me , and bring me to a stricter account .

Herevpon I hastned away as fast as my legges would carry me , making no stay , till I came into the Popes Territories : Calling my Rome still to minde , Rome commended by Guzman . and throwing a thousand blessings vpon it ; for there , they did not sticke vpon trifles , nor did not busie themselues to examine colours , but let euery man ( without more adoe ) make the best of his liuing . To conclude , Tierra larga : a large Country for my money . Let me liue ( to choose ) in a spacious Countrey , where a man may haue Sea-roome inough , and not be driuen to runne through narrow Streights and Creekes , sayling still in the Channell , where there is few fetching of boords , nor any danger of being cast away vpon the Coast : Wheras , in your narrow Seas , euery little gust of winde , euery small flawe , or least tempest in the world , will cast you vpon Quick-sands , or throw you vpon the Rocks , till you be either swallowed vp , or dasht in pieces .

CHAP. VI.

Guzman de Alfarache discourseth of Almes : And being returned to Rome , hee fals afresh to his old Trade of begging . Hee feignes himselfe to haue a sore l●…gge . A Cardinall taking compassion of him , takes order , to haue him cured in his owne house , and to be laid in his owne bed . He discouers the knauery of Surgeons , hauing a bad conscience : And how being cured , he becomes the Cardinals Page .

IT is a knowne and naturall truth ; That those that are yong , are very short-sighted in your choyser sort of things , which require grauity , and carry any weight with them : Not for any defect of vnderstanding , but for want of Wisedome , which requireth experience ; and that experience , Time . As Wisedome , gotten by Time . your greene fruit , that is not come to it's ripenesse , hath not any perfect rellish , but is tart , and sowre ; so a young man , before he come to his maturitie , lacks his true taste , and failes in the speculation of things , and comes short of the true knowledge of them . And therefore , it is no wonder if he erre ; but 't were rather a wonder , if he should not erre . Notwithstanding , A great wonder if youth should not ●…rre . he that hath good naturall parts , is commonly more capable of these considerations , and readier to receiue the impression of them .

This I know by my selfe ; for many times , the greatnesse of my Spirit did transport me farre beyond that which sorted with my yeeres ; setting ( as the Eagle doth with her young ones ) my eyes fully fixt against the Sun of Truth ; considering with my selfe , that all my cunning tricks , and sundry manner of deceiuings , was but a kinde of coozening my selfe , by seeking to rob him , that was truely poore and in need , maymed , and not able to worke , to whom those Almes did of right belong . For the poore man indeed neuer deceiueth , nor can he so doe , though it be his end so to doe . For he that giueth , regardeth A poore man neither doth , nor can deceiue . not to whom he giueth ; and he that beggeth , is that Quayle-pipe or whistle , that cals those Birds vnto him , whilest he sits securely on his perch . The Begger , with the Call and cry of his lamentations , receiueth the Almes , which he conuerteth to his profit , taking God in his mouth , whereby he makes him the debtor , binding him to repay it . On the one side I was glad , when they gaue me any thing ; On the other side , I did quake and tremble , when I tooke account of mine owne life . For I assuredly knowing , that that was the way to my condemnation , I was bound to make restitution , as did that Florentine . But What kinde of poore are bo●…d to make 〈◊〉 . when I did sometimes see and obserue , that some powerfull and rich men would curiously put themselues to search in euery corner of their purse , for to look out a poore Blanke , a single-sol'd piece of money ( God he knowes ) and had there beene a lesse coyne , I thinke they would haue beene well inough contented with it to giue vnto the poore , I could by no meanes indure it , my bloud would rise at it , and I was ready to lose all patience . And euen now ( me thinkes ) whilest I am now speaking of it , my buttons swell ; the coales of my choller ; reuiue and quicken afresh , and such a furie of rage assayleth me , and sets me on against them , that I cannot containe my selfe , but must needs say something , though I know what , nor where to begin .

Hear'st thou me ( thou my rich friend ) a●…t thou not yet wearied out , or waxen deafe , with so often hearing what hath been said vnto thee , ( it hauing beene An admoni●…on to the rich to be liberall in their A●…s . so often beaten in thine eares , and inculcated vnto thee ) that whatsoeuer thou shalt doe for any poore body , that shall begge an Almes of thee for Gods sake , thou doest it for God himselfe , and he isty'de vnto thee for the same , and stands bound for the payment , by taking the debt vpon him , and making that his owne , which is another mans ? Wee that are poore , are like a Cipher in Arithmeticke , which of it selfe is nothing , but with the addition of a figure is something , and the number is still the more , the more Ciphers are set before those figures . If thou wilt stand for ten , set a poore man by thee , and see how many the more poore men thou shalt relieue , & how many the more Almes-deeds thou shalt doe , they are as so many figures , to make vp a greater reckoning for thee with God , when thou shalt be called before him to make thine account .

What shouldst thou sticke vpon the matter , and begin to debate and consider with thy selfe , whether I get or not get , whether men giue me , or giue me not ? But doe thou giue me that which I aske thee , if thou hast wherewithall and art able to doe it . And if not for Gods sake , which commands thee to doe it , yet out of that naturall affection , which thou owest vnto me . And doe not flatter thy selfe , or so much as offer to thinke , that the wealth which thou inioyest , and the riches that God hath giuen thee , is ; That thou art better Wooll then we ; but that thou art better carded . And he that made thee thus fine , and me thus course ; by giuing to thee , and taking from mee , may change hands , and may bestowe his blessings vpon whom he please , and on such as hee shall thinke worthy thereof , and shall doe more good with it ; then thou doest . Be not a pryer into the poore , nor too strict an examinant : demurre not what thou shalt doe for him , stand not a hinching and a crinching with him ; for if thou looke well into thy selfe , thou wilt finde Couetousnesse to be the cause of all this , and that they are but meere excuses , because thou would'st not giue him any thing , and so shift him off from thee : I know it is so ; and therefore let me perswade thee ( for thine owne good ) to inlarge thy minde , and that will make thee to inlarge thine Almes . And for this end , as also that thou maist see the good effect of Almes , heare that , which Sofronius rrecounteth , cited by Canisius , a very learned man .

A Widow-woman , hauing one onely Daughter , being a very faire and beautifull Damzell , Zenon the Emperour fell mightily in loue with her , and The Emperour Zenon , a great Almes-giuer . was exceedingly inamoured of her ; and by force ( quite against her will , and vtterly with her dislike ) he deflowred her ; and with a strong and tyrannous hand , kept her , and enioyed her .

The Mother of this Maiden , finding her selfe much afflicted for this her so much wronged and abused Daughter , bearing great deuotion to a particuler Image of our Lady , as often as she presented her selfe there before it , she would still recommend this her cause vnto her , saying ; O blessed Mary , O sweet Virgin , I heere vpon my knees begge reuenge and punishment for this force and affront , which that Tyrant Zenon the Emperour hath , and doth still offer vs . It is said , that she heard a voice , which spake thus vnto her ; Thou hadst The effect of Almes-deeds . beene long agoe e're this reuenged on him , if the Almes-deeds of the Emperour had not bound our hands .

Loose thou thy hands , that are too fast bound ; stretch them out to t●… poore , and helpe them therewith ( as well as thou canst ) out of the misery , wherein they lye . For it is thy duty so to doe , it is required at thy hands ; and it much more concerneth thee to giue an Almes , then the other to receiue it . God did not so much make the rich man for the poore , as the poore man for the rich . Not so much for his , as for thy good . And therefore doe not thou stand off , and intertaine thy selfe with saying , One man merits more then another ; This deserues some-what , and this not . There is but one God , and they aske of thee in his name ; to him thou doest giue it . All is one , thou art to make no The necessities of the poore cannot be truely knowne by vs difference . Thou canst not vnderstand , how much another mans necessitie doth wring him , nor is it possible that thou shouldst come to knowe it . It is the outward man onely , that thou canst iudge of . And thou thinking , that such a man is sound and in health , it is not fit ( as thou supposest ) that thou shouldest giue him an Almes .

Doe not seeke starting holes , to hide away thy Deuotion ; seeke not excuses , to put away the poore from thee ; leaue that to their Lord and Master , thou hast no Commission to examine them ; it is not giuen thee in charge . There are other Iudges , to whom this scrutinie belongeth . And if , looking vpon me , thou wilt let thy iudgement slip , and say , that God hath been too slacke and negligent in punishing of me ; Consider , that the selfe-same God hath done the like by others .

Do not ( O thou man of euill bowels , thou vnmercifull-minded man ) doe not thou , I say , lye in waite to doe mischiefe . The Ambush is discouered , and I see thy meaning . I say then , that Charity , and distribution of Almes , hath it's method and order , as in other things . Nor doe I say , that thou shouldest not order thy Charitie ; but I say , that thou shouldest exercise thy Charitie ; That thou shouldst giue freely , and not pinchingly ; That thou shouldst not make such a deale of scrupulositie with thy selfe ; whether he should haue an Almes or not haue an Almes ? whether hee haue need , or not need ? Troubling thy selfe with this , and with that , and I know not what . If thou wilt giue it him , giue it him quickly ; if thou canst not , say thou canst not , and ther 's an end . Yet let me tell thee by the way ; if a poore man begge of thee , then , euen then , dost thou owe him an Almes , and it costs him deare too , as I told thee before .

And let me farther tell thee , That thy Office is onely to giue . Let the Rulers and Magistrates , the Bishops and their Vicars , open that doore to who are to iudge of the poore . looke into , it is their eyes that must see who is poore , and who not , and accordingly appoint the punishment .

This is for men of Office ; this , for men of authority ; yet it is a crosse vnto them ; yet is it a trouble vnto them . Nor were they made Gouernours , or Heads ouer others , for to eate the best morsels , or to feede on the daintiest What manner of man be ought to be , that is in authoritty . dishes , but to take more paines and cares then other men . Not to laugh and make themselues merry with their Fooles and Iesters , but to lament and bewayle the wretched estate of the poore : Not for to sleepe and snort , but to watch and sigh , hauing continually ( like vnto the Dragon ) the eye-sight of the Spirit cleere . So that , it onely appertaines vnto thee to giue an Almes : And doe not thinke , that thou doest then performe that dutey , when thou giuest that thou canst not well tell what to doe withall , and hast kept it so long in some corner a moulding , that it is fitter to be throwne out vpon the dunghill , then any thing else . And as if the poore were that dunghill , thou giu'st him thy mouldy and thy stinking meate ; not so much out of Charitie , or any deuotion thou hast to giue it to the poore , as because thou canst not eate it thy selfe , and wouldst haue thy house faine rid of it . But this , I tell thee , is the sacrifice of Cain . That which thou wilt offer , must be of the best things that thou hast , as did that good and iust man Abel , with a desire and will that it were much better , wishing it may doe him much good . Not , as though thou didst giue by constraint and compulsion , nor yet for ostentation , hauing ( like the Pharisee ) the trumpet to go before thee , to sound foorth thy praise ; but only out of meere charitie , that thou maist reape thereby that fruit that is promised thee , God accepting of thy sacrifice .

I was now a pretie waies off from Rome , whither I was bending my steps . Guzman with much ●…oy arriues at Rome . But I no sooner came thither , but my teares trickled downe my cheekes for ioy . I did wish in my heart , that mine armes had beene so large , as that they might haue beene able to haue imbraced those sacred Walls . The first step that I set within those holy gates , I fell downe on my face , and kist that hallowed ground . And because that Country , which a man knowes , and where he hath his meanes , the same is to be accounted his Mother , I did much ioy to see it . I knew the Citie well , and was as well knowne in it . I began ( as I had done before ) to seeke some course to liue , and to maintaine this life of mine : I falsely call it life , being it was my death , though it seemed vnto me , to be my proper Center .

O alas , how strangely are we wedded to our passions , and how strange doth that seeme vnto vs , which doth not answer thereunto , be it neuer so true , neuer so certaine ! This seemed to me , to be my only happinesse ; holding ( in comparison thereof ) euery other thing as a misfortune . And though I did see all , yet I inclined still to the worst , thinking still , that that was the best . Video meliora , &c.

I was stirring one morning betimes , according as I had formerly beene accustomed , and trugg'd along with my sore legge , with which I sate me downe to begge at one of the Cardinals gates . And he comming forth for to goe to Guzman falls a b●…gging a●…w with his counterfeit sore legge . the Palace , stay'd to heare me , in how loud a voice and extrauagant a tune , I besought his pitie : not vsing those plainer notes of eight , but saying ; Giue mee somewhat ( noble Christian ; friend of Iesus Christ ) take pit●…e of this sore afflicted sinner , maimed and pained in his members ; Looke vpon these wretched limmes : consider my vnfortunate yeeres , and take some compassion of this miserable creature ! O my most reuerend Father , my most noble Lord , shew some A forme of begging vsed by some beggers . sense of sorrow , haue some little feeling , I beseech your most illustrous Lordship , of this poooe young wretched Youth , and powre forth your fatherly compassion vpon such a pittifull piece of miserie and wretchednesse , as you see here before you . I begge it at your noble and charitable hands , in that glorious name of the blessed ( though most painefull ) passion of our deare Master and Redeemer Iesus Christ .

My Lord Cardinal ( after that he had heard me with a great deale of attention ) was extremely moued therewith , and conceiued an extraordinary pitie towards me , insomuch that I did not seeme vnto him to be a man , but The Cardinall takes pitie of Guzman . What effect his pitie brings forth . that I represented vnto him euen God himselfe . Thereupon hee forthwith gaue order to his seruants , that they should take me vp in their armes , and carry me into the house , and that stripping me of those old and rotten ragges , they should lay me in his owne bed , and in another chamber adioyning therevnto , they should make his . All which was done in a moment .

O the great goodnesse of God ! ô the largenesse of his noble condition ! Gods goodnesse . They stript me naked , for to cloath mee ; they would not let me begge , but were ready to giue me ; and to make me likewise able to giue vnto others . God neuer takes any thing away from vs , but when hee meanes to bestow greater blessings vpon vs . When God will giue thee any thing , he will first His readinesse to requite vs . aske something of thee . He comes weary about noone to the Fountaine , sits him downe , askes thee a little water whereof the beasts of the field doe drinke . Thou giu'st it him : In exchange whereof , he giues thee the water of the Well of Life , the drinke of Angels , whereof he that drinketh , shall neuer thirst any more . This holy man made him his patterne , who sending presently for two skilfull Surgeons , and promising to see them well rewarded , committed my cure to their charge , and that they should doe their best to make me a sound man . This care being taken , leauing me in the hands of these two Physicians , and Surgeons , no ●…ends to beggers . hangmen , and in the power of my enemies , hee gets him away to the Palace .

Although we vs'd many , and sundrie counterfeitings of sores , yet that which I had then made me , was rubb'd ouer with a certaine Herbe , which caus'd it to looke so ill and so vile , that whosoeuer had seene it , would haue thought the sore incurable , and that great remedies must bee vsed , as to a thing that was shrewdly festred , and growne to a Canker ; yet if the vse of this roguish Herbe be but left off for three whole daies , nature it selfe , without any other helpe , will reduce the flesh to that perfection and soundnesse , that it was in before . To these two Surgeons , it seemed at the first sight a thing of much moment . They threw off their Cloakes , they call'd for a Panne of coales , fresh butter and other things ; and when they had all that they would in a readinesse , they vnswathed me , and vnbound the clouts that were about my legge , which they performed very neatly and handsomely . That done , they askt me how long I had had this sore , if I could ghesse whence it should come ; if I did vse to drinke Wine , what meates I did most vsually feed on , and such other questions as these . Which those that are skilfull in that art , are wont to doe on the like occasions .

All these I answered with silence , lying all along as if I had beene dead , for I was not almost my selfe , nor was I indeed for a pretie while , seeing such a Guzman would not answer to the questions that the Surgeons ●…skt ●…im . deale of preparation to cut , to cauterize and the like ; and in case I should escape all this , I was at my wits end , to thinke that my maladie would bee found out , and so my roguerie be discouered . That which I suffered in Gaeta , seemed but a flea biting vnto me . But now I liued in feare , that the Cardinall would inflict some notable punishment vpon me , for this cheating tricke that I had put vpon him . I knew not how to helpe my selfe , nor what to doe , nor whom to make vse of in this my extremitie . For , neither in all the Letanie , nor in Flos Sanctorum , could I finde any Saint , that was a Defender and Protector of Villanes , or that would seeke to excuse me .

By this time they had viewd me againe and againe , a hundred and a hundred times , and turnd me to and fro , this way and that way , that I thought they would neuer haue made an end ; when at last I brake forth and said ; I am vndone , I am vndone ; yet there is some life left in me : I die if you aske me any more questions , or if you med●…le with me any more . Two houres of trouble haue I alreadie indured vnder their hands , if they doe not burie me now in 〈◊〉 , ( thought I ) I will passe ouer the rest as well as I can . And say they should agree to cut off my legge , the condition were better , and the gaine more certaine ▪ so as I did not die in the doing of it . But suppose also that this should befall me , I should then be before handwith Death , and I shall not be put to indure that brunt another time . What can I doe more ? ( vnfortunate man as I am ) I was borne into the world , here I must suffer , patience must be my best comfort , shuffle the Cardes therefore anew , and see whether we shall haue any better lucke . For my rest is vp , and the care is already taken .

While I was thus doubtfull what would become of me , the couetousnesse S●…ons of 〈◊〉 euill 〈◊〉 , what kinde of men they be . of these Surgeons , and their greedinesse of gaine , opened the doore to my remedie . The one of them ▪ ( who was better experienced then the other ) came to know at last , that this sore was a counterfeit sore , and that by the signes and Symptomes of it , it proceeded from the effects of that very selfe-same Herbe which I had vsed . But this he kept close to himselfe , telling his fellow , This flesh is canker'd all ouer , and therefore it is necessarie , that to hinder it from spreading any farther , and that other new flesh may come vp in its place , to cut it all away to the quicke , and then there was no doubt of the well curing of it .

The other said vnto him ; This cure will aske a great deale of time ; all this filthy matter must be taken away , till we come to the very belly , as it were , wherein the very pith and Core of it lies , before we can well tell what to say to it . Howsoeuer , we haue here a faire occasion offred to shew our skill , and to picke out something of it , for the better passing ouer of this hard yeere . He that was the more expert man of the two , tooke the other by the hand , and led him forth aside into a withdrawing roome , that ioyned close to the chamber . I , when I saw them thus goe forth together ( suspecting some secret consultation ) I stole me out of my bed after them , that I might listen to their talke , and it was my hap at last to heare the one of them say to the other ; Master Doctor , I doe thinke ( be it spoken vnder correction ) that your Worship doth not rightly and truly vnderstand this young mans maladie ; for you shall seldome meet with the like kinde of cures , and there is scarce one of a hundred , when they doe meet with them , that doth know them , o●… can tell what to make of them , yet shall I acquaint you with what I know : we are Partners in this businesse , and therefore I will hide nothing from you ; but it is a great secret , that I haue to communicate vnto you . What ( for Gods sake ) said the other ? I shall tell you , sir : and with that he said ; This begger The wicked co●…l of two Surgeons , about Guzmans , ●…e legge . is a notable dissembling Rogue , a subtill Villaine ; these sores that you see , are feigned ware , counterfeit stuffe . What shall we doe in this case ? Let me be aduised by you . If we leaue him off thus ▪ the bird will escape our hands , and so we shall lose both the credit and profit of this Cure . If take vpon vs to cure him , we haue no cure to worke vpon , and then this Rascall will befoole vs , and laugh at our ignorance : and if we cannot one way or other come off fairely to our best aduantage , the be●… course will be ( in my opinion ) to acquaint the Cardinall how the case standeth , and what a count●…feit Knaue we haue vnder our hands .

No sir ( said the other ) I hold not that so fit . Let vs hold the Bird fast , while we haue him : it is a lesse euill , that vpon this young fellow ( that is no better then a Picaro , and an errant Rogue ) we should gaine vs a ●…ittle reputation , and come off with some good opinion , then to let slip so fine and so faire an occasion . Let vs therefore take no notice of these his counterfeit sores , but rather lay some Playsters thereunto , that may entertaine and delay the time : And if need be , we shall afterwards apply some Corrosiues , that shall eate into the sound flesh , in the cure whereof , we will spend some few daies . Nay then ( quoth the other ) the best way will be , Sir , ( as I take it ) to begin first with fire , cauterizing that part which appeares thus infected .

Now , which of these two remedies they should first begin withall , as also , how they were to share the gaines betweene them , a great quarrell there was , they could not agree vpon the point ; for he that first found out the nature of my sore , would haue the greater share , or else he would acquaint the Cardinall with the whole businesse .

When I saw vpon what they stucke , and that it was a matter of little or no moment , and that vpon their difference , which was occasioned by my miserable pouertie , I might runne the hazzard of my vtter ruine , I rusht in betweene them , and throwing my selfe downe at their feet , I said thus vnto them , Gentlemen ; on your hands , and tongues , depends my life , or death : my remedy , or my ruine . From my hurt no good can come to you ; but from Guzman speaks to the Surgeons . They a●…e together to abuse the charitie of this good P●…clate . my good , you may reape assured both profit , and credit .

I know you are not ignorant of the necessitie and want which the poore suffer , and of the hardnesse of rich mens hearts , insomuch , that to mooue them to the more compassion and the easilier to get an Almes from them , we are inforced to wound our flesh , with these kinde of sores and martyrdomes , induring much trouble , and suffering much paine , yet neither these , nor greater miseries that we abide , are of power to preuaile with them . It were a great mis-fortune in others to indure that out of necessitie which wee willingly suffer , for that poore and miserable maintenance , which we draw from thence . I beseech you ( for Gods sake ) to take pitie on me , seeing that you are men that runne through the troublesome street of this world , and are made of flesh and blood , as well as my selfe ; and that , which hath driuen me to this hard exigent , may likewise light vpon your selues .

Doe not ( I beseech you ) bewray me , worke your will vpon me , and wherein I may serue and helpe you , I will not be wanting to do as you will haue me , and in all things to be so ruled by you , that you may gaine much by this your cure . You may be confident of me , and trust me as you would your owne liues ; for if there were no other meanes to make me sure vnto you , the feare of mine owne punishment is sufficient of it selfe , to binde me to be secret . Nor let not the respect of gaine restraine your kindnesse ; for it is better to get , then to lose . We are three of vs , let vs all play booty , and ioyne together to coozen the Cardinall ; for he is rich , and something is better then nothing .

These intreaties , seasoned with a few teares , and vttered with that earnestnesse as I deliuered them vnto them , were sufficient to make them approue of my counsell ; and so much the rather , for that they saw that I had hit the nayle right on the head . Wherewith they were so well pleased , that they were ready for ioy to take me vp vpon their shoulders , to carry mee to my bed . And so they and my selfe grew fully agreed to play euery man his part as well as we could .

Whilest this businesse was in debating , they were so long before they could agree vpon the matter , that I was scarce put into my bed , and the cloathes cast vpon me ; but that my Lord Cardinall was come to the Chamber doore ; who when he was entred , one of the Surgeons said vnto him : The Surgeons dissemble th●…s counterset ●…ore with the Cardinall .

This yong mans malady ( may it please your Lordship ) is a very grieuous one , and we must necessarily apply , great remedies therevnto . For the flesh is festred and canker'd in many places , and it hath taken such deepe roote , that it is impossible for the plaisters that we are to apply to worke any good effect , without some long tract of time ; but I am very confident , and dare be bold to assure your Lordship , that ( by the helpe of God ) we shall make him as sound a man , as euer he was in his life .

Then said the other , If this Youth had not thus luckily falne into your Lordships pittifull and charitable hands , within a few dayes , these his sores would haue been so putrified , and haue so corrupted the wholebody , that all the world could not haue sau'd his life , but he must haue perished , and dy'de . But we shall so stop this Canker , from spreading it selfe any farther , and vse such good meanes for his recouerie , that I make no question but within sixe moneths ; if not sooner , his flesh shall come to bee as whole and as faire as mine .

The good Cardinall ( whom Charitie had onely mooued herevnto ) told them ; Be it in sixe , or in ten , let me haue it throughly healed and cured as it ought to be cured , and I shall take order that you be prouided of all things necessary for it , you shall want nothing . With this , he left them , and with-drew himselfe into another roome . This did put new life into me ; and as if they had drawne my heart out of the one side , and had thrust it in on the other into my body againe , so did I then feele my selfe . For euen till that very instant , I did not rest assured of these two traiterous Surgeons . I stil feared , they would haue wheeled about another way , and haue beene the cause of my vndoing . But by that which I had heard them treat in my presence , I was some-what cheered , and began to be of good comfort .

But the custome ofSwearing , Gaming , and Begging , are things that are Swearing , Gaming , and Begging , three things hard to be left . hard to be left off . It could not choose but grieue me very much , that I was hindred in my course , mew'd vp , debarr'd my liberty , and made vnable to inioy those good and plentifull Almes , which I gain'd by begging . Which losse notwithstanding did seeme the lesse , in regard of that curious intertainment , choyse dyet , and good lodging that I had , that mans desire could not haue wisht it to haue bin better . For I was waited on , like a Prince , and cured with that care , as if I had beene the Cardinall himselfe . And so had he giuen commandement to the seruants of his house ; besides his dayly comming in his owne proper person to visit me . And sometimes he would sit downe and make some stay with me , talking of such things , wherein he tooke pleasure to heare me .

At length , being healed of this infirmitie , ( when the Surgeons saw their Guzman is fully cured . He is made one of the Cardinals Pages . time , ) they were dismissed , receiuing a great deale of pay , for a little paines . And I was commanded to be new cloath'd , and to be listed in the Roll of the Pages ; that as one of them , from that time forward , I might attend , and wait vpon his Lordship .

CHAPTER VII .

Guzman de Alfarache discourseth , how all things haue had their time of Empire . He deliuereth strange things , touching Truth , and Lying . As being Page to the Cardinall ; hee declareth the Uertues , and the Vices , wherein your Pages exercise themselues . He relateth a pleasant Story of his stealing of some Conserues ; and how he was punished for it .

OF all things created , none can complaine to haue past without Al things created haue had their time of sway . it's Empire . They haue all of them had their day , and haue taken their turne . But because Time changeth al things ; these are past and gone ; and those haue finished their course .

And first to begin with Poetry , it is apparent to all the Poetry . world , how much that in it's time was celebrated .

Let ancient Rome report , in what reuerence were your Orators held , that were skill'd in the Art of Rhetorick , and had the gift of Oratory . speaking well and eloquently .

And let our Spaine speake , what honour is now at this day giuen to those Diuinitie . sacred letters of holy Writ , so many yeeres since , so well receiued by her ; And in what esteeme stand both the Lawes , Ciuill , and Canon . Law .

The fashion of Apparell , and wearing of cloathes in Spaine , cannot escape amongst the rest ; wherein we dayly finde new changes , and new alterations , Apparell . after which strange fashions all runne as fast , as scatteringly , and as much out of order as Goates doe one after another ; and as one Sheepe leapes after another ; so doe men and women leape into fashions . Hee is no body that is not in the new fashion . And nothing now seemeth well , but what is in vse ; notwithstanding that it hath been already vsed , and that lately , and approued for good : And that sottish ignorance of the common rout , and baser sort of people , is come now to that passe , that they will all forsooth be alike ; the tall man as the short ; the Quack-belly , as the Scranio ; the fat , as the leane ; the sicke , as the sound ; the deformed , as the well-proportioned man , will haue ( if not one & the selfe-same measure ) at least one and the selfe-same fashion ; putting themselues into vgly and monstrous shapes , and into an indecent and ill-becomming weare of cloathes , and onely because they will follow the fashion , and be in the same cut as others be , as if one kinde of Syrrop , or Purge , were fit for all diseases .

The words likewise and phrases of our speech , haue been corrupted by vse , Words & sp●… and those which once were fyled phrases , and pure language , are now accounted rude and barbarous .

Meates also haue their season , and their time ; For that doth not please vs Mea●…s . in the Winter , which we haue a great desire vnto in the Spring ; nor that like vs in the Autumne , which we haue a minde vnto in the Summer .

Your buildings , and your Engines of Warre are dayly renued . Your Manuall Buildings . Warlike Engines . workes , and those that are wrought with the hand , haue their turnings too ; as your Seates , your Chaires , your Benches , your Cupboords , Manuall Arts. your Cabinets , your Tables , your low Stooles for women , your Lamps , your Candle-sticks , and the like : Your sports , your games and your Dances , Musicke . Dancing . haue also their changes . And euen in Musicke , and in Songs , wee finde the like .

For some are much taken with the a a Zarauanda : a knowne Dance in Spaine , very wanton and lasciuious . The women of Cadizmuented the Dance , and brought it to Rome , whereof Martial ma●…es ment●…on in some places . Es●…lly lib. 5. Epig. 79. Nec de Gadibus improbis puellae Vibrabunt sine sine prurientes Lasciu●…s docili tremore lumbos . Truth banished . Zarauanda ; and others may come hereafter , that will vtterly mislike it , and make it grow out of date . Who haue seene your Mules in former times , how much Veluet they haue drawne along with them in their * * Foot 〈◊〉 Asses . Foot-cloathes , may now in these behold how incapable they are of any such courtesie , being not suffered to haue any ornaments of Silke or Gold .

We are all witnesses , when the time was , that my little pretty Sardinian Asse , was your womens onely Regalo and delightfull companion , when they performed their Stations , or went vpon their Visits . But they are now all for their * * Pack-Sadelles . D●…gs . Monkies . Pa●…ats . The D●… and Spindle . Truth , how w●…ch r●…cted in 〈◊〉〈◊〉 . Sillas , and easie Chaires carried with hands , which heretofore were well contented with good honest Pack-Saddles .

Let your Ladies now tell me , how ●…ntiall a thing it is , and how much it importeth them , to haue little foysting Hounds , Monkies , and Parrakitos , for to intertaine the time ; who in times past did spend those idler houres at the Reele and Spin●…le , and exercising their Needle in some curious , yet necessarie workes : But these are falne into disgrace , they are growne out of fashion , their time is past and gone , they haue their course , and are vanished with the rest .

The like hath hapned vnto Truth , that also hath had its time : Insomuch that it was anciently much more vsed then now : And so much , that it was a generall saying in those dayes , that it was resp●…cted aboue all other Vertues ; and he that told any Lye , were it of more or lesse importance , receiued punishment accordingly , euen to the l●…sse of life , by being publikely stoned to death .

But because we are quickly weary of well-doing , and what is ill , will neuer be tyred out ; men growing worse and worse , so holy a Law could not keepe it selfe afoot amongst so many wicked persons . Wherevpon , it came to passe , that a great Plague and Pestilence comming amongst them , all those that were touched with it ( if they escaped with their life ) remained with some offensiue marke or other on their persons : And as it befalleth , that one generation pass●…th , and another comes in the place , one succeeding another ; they that were borne sound and whole , reproched those other with their faults and defects , wherewith they were notably grieued to see themselues thus disgraced and tooke it very offensiuely at their hands .

Whence it came to passe by little and little , that Truth began to be heard with an vnwilling eare . And because men were thus vnwilling to heare it , A short Story of Truth . they grew at last to be vnwilling to tell it . For by the first round , we come vnto the second , and by the second , by degrees to the top of all . And a little sparke sometimes s●…ts a whole Citie on fire .

At last they grew so bold as to breake this Statute , and not contented therewith they banished Truth at last into perpetuall Exile ; and in her stead Lying was entertained and seated in her throne .

Truth being thus condemned , she went from among them to performe the tenor of her Sentence . She went all alone , Poore , and naked ; as it vsually hapneth vnto those that are sunke , and falne from their fortunes ; ( for euery man is valued according to that that he hath , or as his abilitie is ; and those which formerly haue beene our friends , in time of aduersitie turne tayle , and become our enemies . ) And hauing gone some few daies iourneyes from thence , standing on a high Mountaine , she might perceiue , passing ouer the edge of a little Hill , a great companie comming along , and the neerer still they drew , the greater did their number appeare . In the midst of a Squadron , compassed about with an Armie , came Kings , Princes , Gouernours , Priests Lyes Triumph . of that profession , Men of command , and Rulers of those Prouinces , euery one according to his qualitie , either more or lesse , neere to this triumphant Chariot , which they had placed in the midst , with a great deale of Maiestie , which was wrought with admirable Arte , and extreme curiositie .

In this Chariot , was there a high Throne erected , whose seate was of Iuory , Ebonie , and Gold ; wherein were inchased many precious Stones , and a woman sitting thereupon , with a Crowne vpon her head , like a Queene ; her face most beautifull ; but as you drew neerer and neerer vnto it , it did lose much of it's fairenesse , and at last appeared most foule and vgly . Her body , when she sate still , and did not stirre , seemed lustie , neate , and handsome ; but when she rose vp , and stood vpon her feet , or walked vp and downe , she discouered many defects . Her Robes were of changeable Taffaties , exceeding rich and glorious to the eye , and full of varietie of colours , strangely diuersified , and cunningly intermingled one with another , but the threds so slender , so subtill , and of that little or no substance , that the very ayre would puffe it in pieces , and euery the least thing , either make bracks in it , or breake and teare it to fitters .

Truth , she stood still ( poore soule ) till this Squadron was past , admiring to see so much greatnesse and State ; but when the Charriot came right ouer against her , the Lady Lye tooke notice of this poore honest Dame Truth , and commanded those about her to stay . And causing her to come neerer vnto Lye meetes with Truth . her , she began to aske her whence she came , whither she would , and what she went about ? And Truth plainly told her all .

The Lady Lye thought it fitting out of state and greatnes , and for a farther addition of honour , to lead her along with her : For euery one is so much the more powerfull , by how much the greater are the enemies , whom he ouercommeth : and is by so much the more esteemed and reputed of in the world , by how much the mightier the forces are , against which he makes resistance .

Hereupon she commands Truth to wait vpon her . There was no remedy , she could not auoyd it , she must along with her , whether she would or no ; but in the tayle of all the troope , being commanded to come last , for that Truth , where she takes her place . was her knowne place , and at that time did ( as it should seeme ) properly belong vnto her .

He that will seeke for Truth , shal not finde her with this great Lady Lye , nor with any of her Ministers , for she comes in the Rere last of all , and there she manifests her selfe to those , that make inquirie after her .

The first daies iourney that she march't , she came to a goodly faire Citie , where Fauour went forth to receiue her , a very potent and powerfull Prince , Fauour goes forth to meet the Lady Lye . who inuites both her and all her Traine to his house .

The Lady Lye accepted of this his kindenesse , giuing him many thankes for this his courteous offer , but would needs goe to lodge at the rich and sumptuous Palace of Wit , where a great feast , and a curious banquet was prouided for her . Wit emertaines the Lady Lye .

Afterwards , when she was to goe from thence , and to passe on forward with her Troopes , my Lady Lyes Steward , which was Ostentation , tall of Ostentation the Lady Lyes Steward . person , with a long beard , a graue countenance , a settled gate , and words well plaste , came to mine Host , that had giuen them this good entertainment , & ask't him , what was to pay ? The reckoning was summ'd vp ; and the Steward , without contradiction , or abatement of any thing , told him it was wel . The coyne , wherin the Lady Lye makes her payments .

Then the Lady Lye called Ostentation her Steward vnto her , saying ; See you pay this man well , out of that money which you gaue him to keepe , when you came in hither . Mine Host seemed to be amazed thereat , and began to wonder with himselfe , what money this should be , that they talked of ; and thought at first , that they had but spoke in iest . But when he saw that they stood so stiffely in it , and that the same was affirmed by so many of good ( as they seemed to be ) condition and qualitie , he did very much complaine , saying ; That till now , he had neuer beene so ill vs'd before in all his life . Vpon that my Lady Lye , for the iustifying thereof , presents these for Witnesses ; Idlenesse , her Treasurer ; Flattery , her principall follower , and chiefe Attendant Lyes Witnesses , who they be . on her Person ; Uice her Chamberlaine ; And Wily-beguile-you , one of her maides of Honour , together with diuers other of her seruants . And that she might conuince him the better , she commanded Interest , mine Hosts Sonne , and Couetousnesse , his Wife , to be brought forth before him : All which auouched to his face , that it was so .

Wit seeing himselfe in this streight , did rend the ayre with his Exclamations , Wit complaines of his wrong . calling vpon the heauens , that they would make the Truth knowne ; for they had not only deny'd him that which they ow'd him ; but they demaunded that of him , which he ow'd them not .

Truth , seeing him thus afflicted , as being one that euer wish't him well , came to him , and told him ; My friend Wit , you haue reason on your side , Truth speakes in fauour of Wit. but I know not how to helpe thee ; for she that denies this debt , is the Lady Lye , and here is no body on your part but my selfe , and all the seruice that I am able to doe you , is ; to declare my selfe for you , as I doe .

The Lady Lye was so startled , and so abasht at this her boldnesse , that she commanded her Ministers , that Wit should be pay'd , but with Truths wealth ; The Lady Lye giues sentence on Wits side , but condemnes Truth in the charges . which was accordingly done . And so they set forward , taking vp , as they went along , Innes and other lodgings , as such kinde of people vse to doe , letting no place scape , where they did not purloine and steale . For one wicked Villaine is commonly the hangman to another . And euermore , ( take it for a generall rule ) one thiefe , one blasphemer , one ruffian , and one damn'd fellow , ends his life by the hands of one that is as bad as himselfe : And these are a kinde of great Fishes , which feed vpon the lesser Frie.

They arriued afterwards at a place , whereof Murmuration was Mistresse , a great friend to the Lady Lye , who came forth to meet her , causing all the Murmuration . great Persons of her Kingdome , and her owne priuate seruants , to lead on the way afore . Amongst the which went Pride , Trecherie , Deceit , Gluttony , Ingratitude , Malice , Hatred , Negligence , Sloth , Obstinacie , Reuenge , Enuie , Murmurations followers , who they be . Iniurie , Folly , Uain-glory , Madnesse , Selfe-will , besides other her familiar friends and acquaintance . She inuited her to be her Guest , and that she would be pleased to make her Palace her Inne , and with that freenesse , as if it were her owne . The Lady Lye accepted of her kindenesse , but with this condition , that she might only haue the vse of her lodgings , and in all the rest , to be The Lady Lye dines a●… her house , and vpon what condition . at her owne charge . Murmuration was very willing to haue showne her greatnesse , and withall to haue giuen her the best entertainment she could ; but because it was Lyes pleasure to haue it otherwise , she rested contented , and thanked her that she would be pleased to doe her house that grace , which she esteemed as a great fauour ; and so without any farther reply on either part , they went hand in hand together to the Palace . Solicitude , who was Steward ; and Inconstancie the Caterer , made prouision of victuals ; the fame Solicitude , Steward of the house : Inconstancie , the Caterer . whereof was so great , that many came from all the bordering places thereabouts , with a world of all sorts of dainties , and whatsoeuer else was necessarie for the setting forth of so great a Feast ; all which was taken vp , without any hucking or sticking vpon the price ; Looke what they askt , that they were agreed withall to haue . But after dinner , when they were to depart , and goe their wayes , the Owners of these things demanded money for what they had sold. The Treasurer said , that hee ow'd them nothing ; and the Caterer , that hee had payd them all . Whereupon there was great stirre , and much adoe ; insomuch that the Lady Lye way faine to come foorth her selfe amongst Lyes sh●… , that she may 〈◊〉 pay what she owes . them , and said vnto them ; My friends , what is it you would haue ? Are you mad ? or what 's the matter with you ? Sure you are either out of your wits , or I doe not well vnderstand my selfe . You are all of you payd alreadie for whatsoeuer you brought hither ; and I my selfe saw with mine own eyes , when your moneys were payd you before Truths face , and in her presence . Let her speake , if she may be taken for a witnesse , whether it be so or no : I will be content to be tryde by her . They going then to seeke out Truth , to decide this difference , and to award what was to be done in this businesse ; she feigned herselfe to bee asleepe . They call'd aloud vnto her . But shee bethinking her selfe , how ill she had been dealt withall before , was in a doubt what shee should doe : at last she resolued with her selfe to feigne her selfe dumbe , and had lost her speech , that she might not pay for that , which others Truth becomes dumbe , and the cause why . had bought , and were her professed enemies : Whereupon she hath continued that custome euer since ; And now truth is growne dumbe , for that she had pay'd so soundly for not being mute before . And therefore hee that speakes the Truth , let him pay for 't by my consent . For as the world now goes , hee is worthy so to doe .

But it seemeth vnto me ( as I haue painted it in mine Imagination ) that Truth and Lying how compared . Truth and Lying are like the string , and the Wrest or Peg in some Instrument . The string hath a delicate sound , sweet , and pleasing to the eare ; But the Peg doth skreeke , squeake , and creake like a Cart-wheele , and can hardly be turn'd and wrested . The string gently yeelds , willingly stretching & inlarging it selfe , till you haue strained it to your liking ; But the Peg goes still twirling and turning , being wrung , wrinched , and pinch't vpon by the string . Iust so stands the case , for all the world , betwixt Truth and Lying . Truth is the Peg , and Lying the string : Well may a Lye goe working and winding it selfe vpon Truth , which is the Peg , and leaue some print , or signe therein , making it to sound harsh & vntuneable to the eare , but in the end , it goes ( although with some difficulty ) turning and winding a Lye so long , till Truth remaine whole and sound , like the Peg ; and Lying crack't and broken , like the String .

If I had treated Truth , all those torments , affronts , and afflictions which Guzmans course of life , what it was . I had runne thorow and indured , could not in the end but haue set me safe in some one good Port or other , and haue brought me with ioy to the fortunate Ilands . But the whole course of my life , was lying , coozenage , and roguerie , and soe like the string of an Instrument , when it came to be put in tune , it could not indure any the least straining , and so presently brake , it was not able ( I say ) to resist and withstand Truthes stretching hand , but went still turning and twirling , from one mischiefe to another , and from one euill into a worse . So one Deepe calleth vp another , and one Waue comes head-longly tumbling in vpon the necke of his fellow .

The Pin is now turn'd , and I am rais'd vp to be a Page , God grant I may come downe no lower . That thing which receiueth violence and is strained Guzman turned Page . to a course contrary to its nature , it is impossible , but it must reuert and returne to it's center , be it low , or be it high ; for that is the place , which it doeth naturally affect and desire . They tooke mee from the height of my glory , and brought me downe so lowe as to serue , which ( being so opposite Nullum violentum diuturnum . as it was to my disposition ) you shall see how long I continued in that course .

Hee that walkes too fast , will be quickly weary ; And to passe so suddenly from one extreme to another , as it cannot be done with safetie , so is it conserued with difficultie . If a Tree take not deepe rooting , it will neuer beare any fruit , but quickly dries and withers away ; So he that is newly put into an Office , cannot suddenly take any deepe rooting ; and say hee should be settled therin some yeeres , he will hardly thriue in a strange soyle , that doth not sort with his nature , and so will proue in the end as vnprofitable to himselfe as vnfruitfull to others . It was too great aleape , to rise from a Picaro , to be a Page , ( though in a manner they are correlatiues , and haue a kinde of relation one to another , only their habit doth difference and distinguish them ) and I could not choose but grieue , as oft as I thought vpon it . That which was common with others , fell out quite contrary with mee . For it is said , Que las honras , quanto mas creçen , mas hambre ponen . That the more honour a man has , the more he desires . But I was so farre from that liking , that it was rather Prouerb . to mee a loathing . Such high places did not please me ; Those that I had profest , those were for mee . Cada vno , en lo que se cria . Let euery man betake himselfe to that , wherein he hath beene traind and bred vp . Is it fit ( thinke Prouerb . you ) to take the fish out of the ●…ater , and to breed Peacocks therein ? To put an Oxe to fly , and an Eagle to plough ? To feede a Horse with sand ? To sup a Falcon with straw ? And to ●…ake from a man his Risibilitie ( to speake like a Logician ) and facultie of laughing ? I was bred vp among the Flesh-pots of Egypt ; my Center was a good victualing house ; my Circle , a good honest Tauerne ; and my end , Vice ; whereunto I did bend amaine ; In that I tooke pleasure , that was health and life to me ; and what was contrarie to that , I tooke no ioy in it , it was not for me , nor was I willing to make it mine .

My mouth was now daintily fed ; my backe delicately clad ; my eyes swolne with too much sleepe ; my hands ( for want of worke ) as soft as silke ; my belly , What Guzman did whilst be was a Page . ( with too much pampering ) as hard brac't as any Drumme ; my buttocks brawny , and thicke-skin'd with too much sitting ; and my chaps ( like a Monkies ) nimbly walking on both sides , when I was at my meat . Tell me , how was it possible for me to content my selfe ; how indure to be put to a set Pension , to stay waiting all day long at a doore , at nights to stand with a Torch in my hand , leaning against a wall , and standing vpon one legge like a Crane , till it be almost day-breake ? Sometimes , ( if not for the most part ) supper-lesse , but frozen ( I am sure ) with cold , expecting the Visits that goe , out and come in , being like a Ladder for others to goe vp and down ; or like a Smiths paire of Bellowes , ascending , and descending , to beare others company , waiting vpon my Lords Caroche early and late ; not onely at some set seasons and certaine times , but at all houres both of day and night , being my red in the Winter with durt ; and choaked in the Summer with dust ; holding a Trencher betweene my Thumbs at meales ; my belly growing leane and lanke through alonging desire , feeding on the best dishes with my eyes , and wishing in my soule , that euery daintymorsell at the boord , had been meat for my mouth . Besides , going vpon one message , and returning with another , tyring out my legges , and wearing out my shooes , and being allowed but euery moneth a paire , we were forced to goe fifteene dayes of the thirty bare-foote . These are the things , that yeerely passe from the first of Ianuary , to the last of December . Pages gettings , what they be . And he , who at the end thereof should aske vs : How haue you thriu'd this yeere ? What haue you got ?

The answer is at hand , Sir , I rest vpon my Lords loue and fauour , I referre my selfe to his discretion and goodnes . I eate of his meat , and drinke of his drinke ; in Winter feeding on that which is cold ; in Summer , that which is hot . And what I haue in that kinde , is but a poore pittance , and that little The clocke of a Pages stomake , must goe still 〈◊〉 hower after his Masters . none of the best , and commonly some-what of the latest , that aman were as good goe without it . I weare what cloathes he giues me , such as you see ; as a Liuery rather of my seruitude , then of deuotion to cloath mee ; not giuen me to keepe me warme , but to doe my Lord honour : And those too must be made to their minde , and our cost . So that our money payes for it , and they choose the colours .

Our greater gaines did consist in cold fare , for there was not one of vs that could finger a full Trencher : scraps , and picking of their teeth , wee had in some aboundance , and with these wee intertained our selues , and the like poore Relicks that they left , and some refuse fruits , that were not worth the eating , and such things as these , or worse , were all the fruits of our labours .

When the winde blew fresh , and that wee had got a matter of some ten or twelue a a A matter of some eight pence , or nine pence . Quartes , which with vs was a great summe , we rais'd this money out of so many drops and flakes of Waxe , which wee tooke off from our Torches , which we sold to some old Cobler or other . Hee amongst vs that could get vp a little stocke , that were worth any thing ; though it were neuer so small , this man had a sufficient Patrimony , and did great things with it , he might buy him a penny-pasty at the Cookes , and other the like odde kinde of iunkets ; but if he were taken in the manner ; he was sure to be whipt for his labour . This was his iudgement . Onely it was permitted vnto vs to steale . I say ( if we had stolne ) it was held the lesse euill of the two . For if it had beene permitted , and that we might haue beene suffered so to doe , I would so cunningly haue imployd my wits in that kinde , that I would in a short time haue beene able to set vp a Chandlers shop . But if I did make benefit of mine owne Torch , or filch now and then from my fellowes some of theirs , that was all that I did . But they were so base , and so crafty withall , that I neuer saw them busie themselues about any other thing , being more desirous to lose their meat , then that ; for victuals are consumed in the belly , and can not afterwards be sold to profit ; and yet for these things too , they had a thousand shifts and rogueries .

For I saw one of them once take a Hony-combe from the table , and presently wrapt it in his Handkerchiefe , and clapt it into his Pocket . But because A Page steales a Hony-Combe , waiting at table ; The Story of it , and his punishment . he waited at the table , and for that he could not carry it so speedily as he would haue done to the Hauen of Safety , nor land it in so good a place as he desired , it hapned that the heat of the weather , and the warmth of his pocket , melted the Honey , which in great haste came trickling downe his Breeches , and dropt out at his knees . My Lord spide it , as he sate at Table , who could scarce forbeare laughing ; at last , to make himselfe merry , he call'd him vnto him and commanded him to put downe his Hose . The Page did so . And when his hands came to touch vpon the Honey , it clung fast to his fingers ends , whereat they fell a laughing , and he went away ashamed . But he had sowre sauce to his sweet meat ; for besides that he neuer tasted of the Honey , hee was so soundly lasht , that his breech dropt Waxe , as fast as the Combe did Honey . Which misfortune should neuer haue befalne me , for I was perfect in all kind of roguerie , and would neuer haue beene to seeke of some slight or other for cleanely conueyance . And that my sword might not rust in my scabberd , but that I might still keepe my hand in vre , I was euermore a practising vpon some toyes and trifles , petty things , not worth the talking , onely to set my fellowes wits aworke , and to giue them a bone to gnaw vpon .

The Diuell ( I thinke ) brought Fooles and Block-heads to the Court , who Foolish Pages , not fit for Court . let euery good morsell slip besides their mouthes : a troublesome and wearisome kinde of people to treat withall , vnfit for the managing of businesse ; insupportable in their carriage , and tedious in their conuersation . A man should be like to a good Horse , or a good Greyhound , vpon all occasions to take his carreere , and to make his course ; and moreouer hee must carry himselfe in a coole and quiet manner .

There were Pages good store ; but I must tell you , that the most of them , nay , I will inlarge my speech a little more , and say ; That they were all Chips of one and the same blocke , a company of beetle-heads , dull-spirited fellowes ; that had no wherry in them , not onely when they were in their Lords presence ; but likewise , when they were out of his sight . They were as slow in executing his will , as they were lazie in getting vp from their beds ; they were idle , retchlesse , carelesse , all set vpon loytering , exercising neither their bodies , nor their braines , which made mee the more willing to play the Guzmans tricks being a Page . Guzman hath a licorish tooth . Wagge with them , and for my better pastime , to put one pretty tricke or other vpon them .

I did store my selfe with Stockins , Garters , Bands , Hats , Handkerchiefes , Poynts , Cuffes , Shooes , and whatsoeuer I could rape or wring from them , which I hid betweene the Straw of one of my fellowes beds , because , if any search were made , they should not finde them in mine . I altered the propertie of these things in an instant , they neuer lay long by me , I would chop them for old iron , rather then bee troubled with the keeping of them . It behooued them to looke well about them , and to see that they had all safe and sure vnder locke and key , for if they should carelessely leaue any thing abroad , those eyes that found it gone , did neuer see it returne againe .

Many of these waggish parts I plaid , which were but tricks of youth , and nothing else . But I fell afterwards into a fault , which I would haue sworne of all others ( so farre was it from my thought ) I should neuer haue offended in . It was a licorish sinne , euen the sinne of Gluttony . Which I doe not know , whether it proceeded from my eating by measure ( as being stinted ) or whether that my longing did prouoke and stirre vp my appetite ? or whether it were now muing time with mee , and that I was to change my old feathers , and get me new ; for they say , that men , while they liue heere in this world , doe at certaine times and seasons , ( as other creatures shead their haires , and recouer new coats ) change and alter their manners and conditions .

I was now growne so licorish , and so sharpe-set vpon sweet meats , ( for the pleasant taste they had , while they passed downe my throat ) that neuer any blind man was halfe so forward to goe repeating his Letanies , and other his set prayers , from doore to doore , to get an Almes , as I was to please my palate : And looke whatsoeuer came within the a a The Spanish word is Columbrar . To discerne a thing a farre off , which can hardly be perceued what it is . It seemeth to be borrowed from the Latine word Collimare . Quod proprium est oculorum , cùm eos in angulum retorquentes , obliquè aliquid aspicimus , penitusque in rem aliquam defigimus , quem admodum Sagittarij solent , cùm aliquid sibi addictum designant . reach of mine eyes , were it as farre as they could ken , and safe inough ( as it might be supposed ) from catching , yet could it not escape my Eagles-talons .

And as the Hart , with his breathing , drawes your Snakes out of the bowels of the earth : So I , if I could but once come to set mine eyes vpon such , or such a dainty , it was sure mine owne , they rendred themselues at first into my hands ; my hands , they turn'd them ouer to my mouth ; and my mouth committed them close prisoners to my belly , where these sweets remained , till they were no longer sweet .

My Lord Cardinall had a great Chest ( which kinde of Chests are much vsed in Italy ) of white Pine ; and I haue likewise seene good store of them in Spaine , which they vsually bring from thence , stuft with Merchandize , but especially with glasses , and earthen cups and dishes , the better to keepe them from breaking .

This Chest stood in a with-drawing Chamber , for to regalar , and cheere himselfe withall , being full of diuers sorts of Conserues ; there , I say , were your dry Suckets delicately candied , your b b A Peare of a delicate taste , brought from the City of Bergamo in Italy , whence it hath the name . Bergamota Peare of c c A gar●…en of great both●… 〈◊〉 , and 〈◊〉 , ●…ll of all 〈◊〉 of 〈◊〉 , 〈◊〉 few ●…gues from Madrid ; It is the Kings garden . Aranxues , your Genoa Cherry , your Melon of Granada , your Seuillian Cytrons , your Oranges , and Pome-Citrons of Plasencia , your Lemons of Murçia , your pretty little Cucumbers of Ualençia , your budds of the Ilands , your d d A kinde of 〈◊〉 growing on the ground like a Melon . Also they are called Amoris poma . Loue-Apples , because they prouoke a man to Lust. Vid. Couarru . Ver. Berengena . Berengenas of Toledo , your e e A kinde of dryed Peaches , which ●…eped some foure and twenty ●…ures in Wine , are good meat . Orejones of Aragon , your Potatas of Malaga : your Pippens , Parsneps , Carrets , Pompeons , besides a thousand seuerall sorts of Comfits , and an infinit number more of sundry different kinds of Sweet-meats , which did disquiet my spirit within me , not suffering my soule to take any rest .

As often as he made any Colation , or did eate any of these things , he gaue me the Key , himselfe standing by , while I tooke them out , neuer trusting mee with them alone by my selfe .

This distrust of his , begot anger in me ; and this anger , a desire of reuenge . This ( though I were broad awake ) did I still dreame on . I thought with my selfe ( God forgiue me for it ) how I might possibly come to haue a fling at this Chest , and open this Myne , which was more precious vnto me , then all the gold in the Indies .

I told you already , that the Chest was a very great one , beeing to my seeming two yards and a halfe in length , one in depth , and another in breadth : it was as white ( if not more ) then any Paper ; the Barres and all the rest of the Iron-worke about it , as small as your finest threds of Cambricke , curiously wrought , smooth and neatly polished , strengthened with good strong plates at the corners , set with studs very handsomely ; the Locke stood in the midst , there being but one Key to open to this sweet Paradise , and that was in my Lords custodie . If thou know'st what it is to steale , or hast euer heard tell of it ; or would'st faine learne how to rob a Chest , and to take what thou wilt out of it , without either falsifying of a Key , ripping open of a Locke , taking off the Hindges , or breaking vp the Boards ; Listen but to me , and I will tell thee how it may be done .

When it was my turne to waite , and that there were any Visits , or other necessarie businesses at home , whose present being in action , might promise Guzman steales his Lords sweet-meates . me securitie ; I had certaine Iron tooles in a readinesse , which I had prepared of purpose , with the helpe whereof I did by little and little heaue vp the lid of the Chest , till I could thrust in a pretty little wedge of wood , and then heauing it vp a little more , I did put in a round sticke , about the bignesse of the head of a reasonable good big Hammer , and this I went wresting in by degrees , turning and winding it faire and softly towards the locke , whereunto , the neerer and neerer still that it grew , the more and the more did it still heaue vp my corner , so that being ( as I was ) but a Youth , and hauing a slender hand , and a small arme , I tooke out such Sweet-meats , as I had most minde vnto , wherewith I fill'd my pockets as full as euer I could stuffe them . But when I could not reach now and then to those that were farther off , that I might meet at last with this their contuma●…ie and rebellion , I did clap vpon the end of a Cane , or some little sticke , two Pinn's , one hauing a sharpe point , and the other made crooked like a hooke , and by the helpe of these two , I brought them to their due obedience .

And thus I became Lord and Master of what-soeuer was within the Chest , without the helpe of any key . In which theft , I carried my selfe so cunningly , that though I had stolne much , yet there was nothing found to be missing . At last I lighted vpon a Melacotone of Castile , which being as faire , and as goodly a one ( for it 's greatnesse ) as euer I saw in all my life , and gilded all ouer , my appetite was much prouoked therewith , it seeming to be one intire piece of Gold , when I first tasted it : the relish whereof ( me thinkes ) remaineth yet still in my mouth ; me thought I neuer tasted any thing better , nor had I euer seene the like before .

Now , because this was a knowne Piece , when it was once discouered , that this curiositie was wanting , there was presently a generall suspition conceiued ; but not any the least thought or iealousie , that it had beene taken out so , as indeed it was , but was rather imagined , that it was done by some counterfeit key . And this did much trouble my Lord the Cardinall , that he should haue any in his house , that should dare to falsifie his locks , especially in so priuate and secret a roome as this was , which he reserued for his owne vse . Whereupon he forthwith called vnto him his principall seruants , to the end that he might search out the truth of this businesse . But as good lucke would haue , it fell out so happily , that all that I had stolne thence , was downe my throat , and thorowly digested , not any the least remembrance thereof remaining any more in my possession . Now my Lord had to his Steward a melancholy Chaplaine , a fellow of an ill concoction , who wisht my Lord , that all his seruants should be call'd together , and afterwards haue them shut vp in one chamber , where they should be thorowly examined , one by one , to see what could be got out of them , and that their chambers likewise be searcht ; for such a piece of worke as this could not proceed from any man of reason , but from the lickorish mouth of some of his Pages , or some other his younger boyes about the house , which had a sweet tooth in their head .

Well , we were all lockt vp close , like birds in a cage , but to no end and purpose in the world ; for they found vs to be all true ( ) blades , not one false one (a) In Spain , all your Sword-blades , are of one length , otherwise they be held vnlawfull , and are forfeited to the Iustice . Prouerb . amongst vs all , but according to the right marke , iust and euen to a hayre . This storme was ouer-past with vs , but not my Lords care ; For , I can assure you , our Master was wonderfull desirous to come to the true knowledge hereof ; And by reason of the great stirre that was made about it ; I did refraine for some few daies , till this businesse might be ouer-blowne , and that the mater was in a manner quite forgotten , y ●…uuiesse otro asno verda ; And that I might haue some faire occasion to haue another fling at them .

Well , I durst not for a prettie while after put my hand to the Chest , nor once offer to cast so much as an eye towards it . But that crookednesse , which a tree once taketh in it's tender growth , the bigger it growes , the crookeder it is , waxing still worse and worse ; And therefore those Knauish trickes , which I had learned in my youth , were so deepely imprinted in me , that they could not be blotted out . So that I was as well able to liue without them , as without drawing ayre , and fetching of my breath : Especially in those things , whereunto I had beene accustomed from a childe ; for I had beene long practised in them , and they pleas'd me passing well , and I tooke such delight and pleasure in them , as in nothing more .

In a word , I must vp into the Saddle againe , though it cost me another fall I could not choose but goe visit my sweet friends , to see how they did ; I got me againe to my old haunt , to see what good game I could finde .

One day then amongst the rest , when my Master was at play , I thought with my selfe , that my master could not ( would he neuer so faine shift them off ) but keepe those Cardinals companie , that were come in kindenesse to see him . This Chest stood in a by-roome , within his bed-Chamber , much after the manner of a Closet .

Now , I had no sooner trust vp my doublet , and tuckt vp the sleeue of my shirt , and thrust in mine arme as farre I could reach , but my Lord had list to make water . Whereupon he rose vp , and came into his Chamber , and not finding any of his Pages there , he went and tooke the Vrinal himselfe , which stood at his beds head , and whilest he was making water , it was my ill hap to heare him : which sudden and vnexpected accident did so startle me , and affright me , that going about to get out mine arme quickly ( that I mightnot be taken in the manner ) making ( as it seemed ) more haste then good speed , my round Rouler fel rumbling on the floore , the Chest , that presently shuts it selfe vpon me , while mine arme , like a Sparrow in a Pit-fall , or a Mouse in a Trap , is taken prisoner betwixt the locke and the lid , where it was held too fast to get forth in haste . At the noyse of the fall , my Lord askt , Who 's there ? I could doe no lesse then make answer to his call , but the Diuell a foot that I could stirre to come forth vnto him . Thereupon he comes in , finding me vpon my knees , stealing the Hony-combes out of his Hiue . He demanded of me , what I made there ? I confest the whole matter how it was , and without any more adoe ( for I saw there was no fence for it ) I told him the whole truth of the businesse . But when he saw how prettily I was taken , the more he look't vpon me , the more desire he had to laugh ; and to make his mirth the fuller , he call'd to those , that were in the next roome at play , that they likewise might come & see , how the bird hung by the wing , & could not get loose . When they saw how I was caught , they all fell a laughing , as though their hearts would haue burst for want of breath ; yet had they so much left at last , as to intreat his Lordship , that this fault might be forgiuen me , as being the first that I had offended him in ; & the rather , for that it is giuen to al Youth , to haue a likorish tooth . My Lord stood off , and would by no meanes be brought to yeeld ; no intreatie would serue the turne , I must be whipt , there was no remedie , but I must be brought to the blocke .

Well , when they saw they could not procure my pardon , then they grew to a new Consultation , touching the number of the stripes ; whereon they were so long a deuising , as if it had beene a thing contained in the Decretals , or some Pontificiall Act , that they had seriously sate on . In the end , thé number concluded on in this Conclaue of Cardinals , was twelue , a full doozen I was to haue , neither more nor lesse . And the care of this paiment was committed to Sir Nicholas , my Lords Secretary , my mortall enemie , who presently carried me away to his Chamber , and layd them on so soundly , and withso good a will , that for a fortnight after I was not able to sit vpon my breech ; but he did not goe so cleare away with this businesse as he thought he should , for it was not long e're I did cry quittance with him , and returned this payment seuen-fold into his owne bosome ; so that he had no great cause , by that time I had done with him , to brag of his bargaine . And that I may not delay you any longer , this tricke anon after I put vpon him .

My gentleman was much troubled with a a Lat: Culex . A Gnat , which the Spaniards call by the name of Mosquito . They bumme more , and s●…ing and bite worse in that Countrie , then here with vs , leauing knobs and bunches in the face . Mosquitos , which did so persecute him , that he could not sleepe for them , they did so disquiet and torment him ; All Rome did swarme with them , and in our house we had reasonable good store .

Whereupon , ( hearing him complaine much of them , and how hee was bitten and vexed by them ) I told him I would giue him a remedy , which we did vse in Spaine ; wherewithall to destroy this troublesome Vermine . Hee thankt me for it , and intreated me very earnestly , that I would doe him the kindenesse to giue it him . I told him , that he should get him a good bundle of b b The Spanish word●… , Peregil . del nombre . Lat: Petroselinum . Apio minudo , que se cria ●…tre las penas ; Deste se baze la sal. sa , que llamamos , Peregil . y se echa en los quisados , y en las ensaladas . It is tak●…n diuersly , sometimes for Parsley , sometimes for Smallage , and sometimes for Sa●…piere . Guzman crye●… quittance with the Secretary . Petroselinum , and hauing steept it well in good Wine-Vineger , hee should put it at his beds head , to the smell whereof all the Mosquitos would come ; whereupon , as soone as euer they lighted , they would presently fall downe dead . He beleeued me , and presently puts it in practice . But when he was gone to bed , and had laid himselfe downe to sleepe , such a swarme of these buzzing busie Flyes came flying about his eares all the night long , and did so plague and torment him , as if they had pull'd out his eyes with Pincers , and held him by the nose with corne-tongs , as Saint Dunstan did the Diuell .

Whil'st they were thus nibbling on his nose , eyes , and all the other parts of his face ; he bestow'd a thousand buffets on his cheekes , thinking with those smart claps to kill these angry creatures ; and perswading himselfe that they would die at last , when they lighted vpon the receipt , that was prepared for them , he past away the time as well as he could vntill the morning .

But the next night after ( because this remedy had not drawne onely those of the house thither ; but all the rest of the Mosquitos , that were bordering there-about ) they did so be-peps him , that not onely his face was most vilely dis-figured therewith , but all the rest of the parts of his body , wher-vnto they were able to reach , ( for some they could not come at for the cloathes , ) were taken in that excessiue manner , so be-pimpled , and so be-spotted , that hee was forced to forsake his lodging , and to get him gone with all the speed he could .

The Secretary was madded at the matter , and could haue found in his heart to haue kill'd me .

But my Lord , when hee look't vpon this ill-fauour'd faced knaue , and saw that he seemed so like a Leper ( for he had not one free place about him , but like a Leopard spotted all ouer ) and that I durst not appeare for feare , but playd least in sight , he was ready to burst himselfe with laughing , when hee heard that I had put this iest vpon him .

Wherevpon , commanding me to be called in , when I came , hee askt me , why I had offered the Secretarie so great an affront , and had thus playd the wagge with him ?

Wherevnto I answered ; Your Lordship may be pleased to remember that you commanded him to giue me a doozen lashes about the businesse of the Sweet-meats . His Commission reach't no further . But I remember very well , how he then vs'd me . For what he gaue me in grosse , I told out by retayle , one by one , as a matter much importing my posteriors . Besides , I know it was not your Lordships pleasure ( as a thing contrary to your mild and gentle disposition ) that they should be the stripes of death : but such as my tender yeeres were able to beare . But el Domine Nicolao , my Worshipfull good friend Sir Nicholas , that he might not be taxed for abad pay-master , gaue me twenty good sound lashes , the last being more cruell then the first . And so hauing exceeded not onely his Commission , but common humanitie , I thought I had iust cause to cry quittance with him : And thus as you see ( whereat I hope your Lordship will not bee offended ) I haue reuenged the Wheales on my breech , by returning them on his face . He was the man that stung me , and I got others to sting him . And I hope , my Lord , this is but one for another . Onely the difference is , that he did prosecute this sute against me in his owne person , and I against him by my Attourney .

This was past ouer as a iest , and I heard no more of it . And for that , by reason of my former bold attempt , I was not onely beaten , but banished Guzman banished the Cardinals Chamber . from the seruice of his Lordships Chamber ; I waited in the meane while ( during this his displeasure ) vpon his Lordships Chamberlaine .

CHAPTER VIII .

Guzman de Alfarache reuenges a tricke which the Secretarie had put vpon the Chamberlayne , whom he then attended . He tels a tale of Shame and Feare ; What it is , and how painted forth . Hee is receiued againe into the Cardinals seruice . And how finely he coozened him of a Barrell of Conserues .

MY new Master was a merry pleasant Gentleman , without any gall or malice in the world , set all vpon sport and good fellowship , there was no harme in him in the earth , no fraud , no deceit ; but was a man of the old making , an honest true Troiane , without any tricks or Iiggs , iust in his dealings , and as plaine as any Pack-staffe . I knew no fault in him , vnlesse it were a little choller ; hee was some-what too touchy , and would ( which was the rendernesse of his nature ) quickly be tinded . Whereunto I may adde his oue●…alous and suspitious nature , which would make him many times to imagine things to be otherwise then they were meant , it beeing the condition of such dispositions to interpret all things to the worst . Quit him of these two qualities , ( which were not ouer-much inherent in him ) and there was not a fairer condition'd man to conuerse withall ; if you would haue sought a whole Countrey , you could not haue met with his fellow .

This Bonus Socius had but poore Parents , to whom he dayly sent his owne allowance , and now and then he would either dine or sup with them , as he did the night before that hapned vnto him , which you shall heare by and by .

What with his drinking of water , and eating certaine Taxarinas ( which is a kinde of meat made of Paste , cut out into slices , boyled with the fat of Birds , and seasoned with Pepper ) he came not home halfe well , and complaining of the crazinesse of his stomake , he went directly to his Chamber , and got him forthwith to bed .

Now his Lord , missing him at supper , asked for him : They told him how it was with him . He sent one of his Gentlemen to visit him , and to bring him word how he did .

To which message hee made answere , that he did not finde himselfe well , but he hop'd in God , he should be well the next morning , being much comforted that his Lordship had been pleased so farre forth to grace his seruant , as to send vnto him , to know how hee did , for which fauour hee rested much bound vnto his Lordship , returning the Messenger , with all humble thankes , and the best remembrance of his loue and seruice .

Thus this matter passed for the present . The morrow after I went to the house of his Parents , with some prouision for their dinner , one of my fellowes remaining with him , who was brushing of his cloathes against his Master should rise .

He , and the Secretary vs'd to breake many iests one vpon another , and many The iest that the Secretary put vpon Guzman's Master . merry passages past betweene them ; And , because they were harmelesse , and without any preiudice to either , my Lord was so farre from misliking them , that he tooke much delight and pleasure in them .

The Secretarie , as soone as he was vp and ready , went towards his Chamber , and meeting with my fellow , who was there ready at hand , waiting when he should be call'd for , askt him ; How his Master did ? He made answere , That his Master was newly falne asleepe , and that he had not taken one houres rest all that night , but that now ( God be thanked ) he slept soundly , and well hoped that the worst was past .

It is well ( said the Secretarie ) and seeing it is so , its pitie to wake him ; but in the meane while , till he be ready to rise , ( which I presume will not bee with the soonest ) I prethee let me intreat thee to goe a little way with a seruant of mine , to helpe him to bring home a certain commodity for me , which he cannot well doe alone , and make all the haste I pray that you can , for I will tarry heere till you come , lest your Master might chance to wake and call for you . The yong Lad did as he desired , and went his way .

Now the Secretary , taking hold on this occasion , that his friend had that night supt abroad , and was not in his Lordships presence , ( as he was wont to be ) that he might haue him in his eye , as he sate at supper : deuised with himselfe how he might put some pretty iest vpon him : and at last the conception of his braine , brought forth this merry Babe . He dresses me a pretty Youth in womans apparell , attired in the habit of a Curtizan , and places this Boy softly and secretly behinde his bed . Now this honest man was all this while fast asleepe , and the entrance was free and open vnto him , whilest the Secretarie , for the more surety , went in first himselfe without being heard ; and afterwards taking this Youth by the hand , led him softly along , and there hee hid himselfe close behinde the bed , as he had beene before instructed , and there he remained quiet , not so much as offering once to stirre .

This being done , the Secretarie went forth , and going to seek out his Lord , he found him a walking , saying of some prayers to himselfe , as his maner was ; who as soone as he saw him , his Lordship demanded of him , how the Chamberlaine did ? Who told him ; I inquired thereof but now , and his seruant told me , that he hath not been well all this night ; And I doe not much maruell at it ; for being with him last night , before I went to bed to see how hee did , I talkt vnto him , but me thought he answered me with an ill will . What ayles him , I know not . There is something in it more then ordinarie , what euer it be ; farther I cannot informe your Lordship .

The Cardinall ( who was charitie it selfe ) presently therevpon made haste to visit him . And when he had set himselfe downe by him , close to his beds head , the Youth comes me out from behinde the Hangings of the bed , and cryes out ; Woe is me , most wretched and vnfortunate Woman ; What shall I doe ? Pardon me ( good Sir ) for I must be gone , for it is late , and I am afraid my husband will misse me . And with that , she went her way , passing through the midst of all the Cardinals seruants , attending there vpon his Lordship .

The Cardinall , who thought him to be a Saint , began to blesse himselfe , and was much amazed thereat . And the Chamberlaine , he on the other side , was as much astonished , taking it to haue beene some Vision , or strange Apparition . He first crosses himselfe , then cryes out , IESVS ! The Diuell , the Diuell : and therewith lept out of his bed in his Shirt , running vp and downe the roome , as if he had beene out of his wits .

The Secretarie , and some other , that were priuy thereunto , fell a smiling , and had much adoe to forbeare laughing out-right ; whereby the Cardinall perceiu'd , that it was meerely a iest , and they did not sticke to confesse as much , telling the whole truth of the matter , and how it was carried .

But the Chamberleine could not stand still , but ranne vp and downe from place to place , not knowing which way to turne himselfe . And albeit they did all labour to quiet him , yet for all that they could doe ; they could not in haste bring him to himselfe againe : but was much abashed ; and mightily ashamed of this scoffe and iest that was put vpon him ; and the more , for that it was in the presence of his Lord . But in the end ( like a good Courtier ) hee dissembled it as well as hee could . And the Cardinall went away blessing himselfe , and laughed heartily as he wont along at this conceited merriment .

Now , by that time I was come backe , all this businesse was ouer-past : But I was as sensible of it , as if they had giuen me so many stripes . And the Chamberlaine would with all his heart haue parted with the best eye in his head , to be fully reuenged on him .

But when he saw , that I looked some-what sad vpon the matter ( himselfe being likewise no lesse heauy ) he said vnto me ; What thinkest thou ( Guzmanillo ) of the wrong that these Villaines haue done me ? To whom I made answere ; They haue done well , Sir , and plaid their parts with you very finely , what would you more ? But if they had vs'd me so scuruily as they haue done you , I verily perswade my selfe , that his Holinesse should not neede to inioyne them any penance for this offence ; nor would I leaue it to mine Heires in my last Will and Testament to repay this debt , but I would quit scores with them my selfe , and pay them home with aduantage : And ere I had done with them , they should very well put that in their eye , which they should get by the reckoning . They all knew me to be a notable Wagge , and that I had an vnhappy wit of mine owne for all kinde of knauery .

But why doe I spend the time in talke , when my Lungs are ready to leape out at my throat , and swell with fulnesse of breath , out of the desire they to haue vent something ? But I kept my selfe aloofe , and was tender to touch vpon that string , as being loth to aduise and counsell him what to doe , not holding it lawfull for a Page to reuenge the iniuries of a graue Minister vpon another that is his equall , Ande cada oueja con su pareja . Like with like doth well . For it is no good iesting with a mans betters . One was enough for Prouerb . Let euery m●…n meddle with his match . me , which might the better be borne withall , because it was in causa proprie ; I was toucht in mine owne person , and therefore had the more reason to right my selfe .

But in this particular , why should I wilfully intangle my selfe in that net , whence I should not afterwards be able to escape , with lesse then the laying on of many a sound lash ; or to come forth with mine eares foure fingers longer then they went in , or with the losse of the haire of my head ? I therefore held my peace , and kept me quiet . But I , who was naturally of a hot and boyling spirit , being often importuned by him , hee making me great offers and large promises , giuing me besides to vnderstand , that the Cardinall should know , that it was a childe of mine owne begetting , and the workemanship of mine owne hands , in defence of him who was then my Master , I resolued with my selfe to enter into the Action , and to vndertake this businesse in his behalfe , and to be the sole Plotter and contriuer thereof my selfe . And so I let some few dayes passe ouer , waiting for some faire occasion that might giue warmth for the hatching of this bird .

When I had found ( as I thought ) a fit time , and that the Ordinary Post of Spaine was to depart , the Secretary was very busie about his dispatches , which required haste . I bought me then a little Rosin , Frankincense , and Masticke , I pounded it , and sifted it all together , till I had wrought it fine , and as small as any Meale . The Secretaries seruant was that morning busied about his Masters cloathes , brushing and making of them cleane with all the speed he could . To him goe I , telling him ; Doest thou heare ( honest Iacobo ) I am Guzmans iest that he put vpon the Secretary , to reuenge his Masters quarrell . come to tell thee , that I haue a dainty piece of Bacon on the Spit , it is now ready , Bread I haue likewise prouided , there is nothing wanting but Wine , if thou wilt finde that , thou shalt share with me ; if not , pardon me , for I shall seeke out one that will . He quickly replyde : No , ( good Guzman ) no , doe not so , for I will giue thee Wine to it . Goe to then ( quoth I ) stay thou here ; for I will presently be with both it , and thee .

Whilest that he went to the a a Despensa . El lugar , donde se ponen la●… cosas , que se traen para comer , y beuer . Such places properly belong only to Embassadours of Princes , or to great Dukes , and not to ordinary persons . Dispense for wine , I tooke forth my paper of Powders , & turning the inside of the Breeches outward , I besprinkled them with a little wine , which I carried about me in a little round glasse Vial , and threw good store of these my prepared Powders vpon them : which when I had done according to my minde , I turned the Breeches againe , putting them iust in the same order they were in , when the Youth left them . He returned anon after with a good Iarre of Wine , and before he could speake vnto me , his Master call'd for him to come in , and bring him his cloathes , for he would rise . He left the Wine with me , and I him within . Where they were both so busie about their Papers , that it was noone before they had dispatch't , & were ready to come forth . The Secretary was a very hayrie man of his body ; & the Powders began to play their part , & to work their effect . The Dog-dayes were then come in , and with the extremitie of those heates , they wrought so vpon his body , that from the girdle downwards he was as if it had beene a Seare-cloth of Pitch , which clung so close vnto him , and was growne so stiffe withall , that he was terribly tormented therewith , for euery hayre did giue him such a twinge when he did but moue , or when with some sudden reach they did rend and vnroot themselues from the flesh , that the tearing of euery seuerall hayre seemed vnto him , the plucking out of so many eyes out of his head .

When he saw in what case he was , he began to call his people about him , to know the cause thereof , but none of them could tell , nor were able to answer to that account , till that the Chamberlaine came in , and told him ; Sir , this is Quid pro quo ; one for another ; Qui moccat , moccabitur . Harme watch , harme catch .

This , sir , is call'd , The beating of the Fencer out of his Schoole . You see for all your cunning , you may take a knocke as well as another man . It is but blow for blow ; you haue giuen me one Venew , and I haue giuen you another . And so let vs shake hands and be friends .

Well , ( to be briefe ) the iest ended in this , that they were faine to get a paire of Sizars , and goe cutting hayre after hayre , which was worke enough for two of his seruants , and yet were forced in the end to vnrip his Breeches , that they might come the better to clip away the hayres .

This Iest tooke better then the former , because it was a little tarter then the other , and stucke closer vnto him . By vertue of this , I receiued the confirmation of my Knauerie , and was taken euer after for the same man I was ; So that all did seeke to flye from my iests , as they would flye from the Plague .

Two moneths of my banishment were now past and gone . After which expiration of time , I returned againe to my former Office ; but with the same Guzman receiued againe into the Cardinals seruice . A Fable touching Modestie . little Modestie , and feare of doing euill , as before . You may haply haue heard tell of that tale , when Modestie , the Ayre and the Water tooke leaue one of another . Who at their parting , asking where they should meet againe and see each other : the Ayre said , that they should finde her on the tops of Hills ; The Water , that they should be sure of her , in the bowels of the Earth . But Modesty , that she being once gone from them , it was impossible to meet with her any more . I haue lost her , she is quite gone from me , and without any hope of euer returning . But it makes no matter . A quien le falta , la Villa es suya , Where she is away , the Towne is ours . Prouerb .

Who would not haue beene feared with those former proceedings , and fully resolued with himselfe neuer to doe the like againe ? But what my amendment was , I shall deliuer vnto you , and what hapned vnto me therevpon . I had certaine sweet guts in my belly , and so made and accustomed thereunto , that those dayes that I mist of my sweet-meates , was a taking of water from the sicke , or Wine from a Drunkard . I would haue ventured the breaking of my necke from the top of a a A Castle in Rome . Prouerb . Santo Angelo , rather then I would not downe to steale them , if they were to be had vpon the face of the earth . And hence is it ; Que quien teme la muerte , no gozala vida . That he that feares Death , does not inioy his life . If feare would haue made me turne coward , I had neuer tasted that so sweet a life . I cast vp my account , and made this reckning with my selfe ; Suppose they should take me againe with the like ? What can they doe vnto me ? or what hurt can come of it ? I haue alwaies obserued , that Feare is painted feeble , leane-visag'd , staring-hayr'd , pale-coloured , sad-countenanced , heauy , melancholy , naked , fearefull , and not daring either to say , or doe that , which it fayne would , and most of all desireth .

Feare is a seruill Act , only proper vnto slaues ; it enterpriseth nothing ; nor doth any thing succeed well , that it vndertaketh ; and is like vnto a cowardly Feare , how painted : And what manner of thing it is ? curre , which knoweth better to barke then to bite . Feare is the soules hang-man ; and it is but foolishnesse , to feare that which cannot bee auoyded .

In a word , it was impossible for me ( such was my condition ) to abstaine from being in Action ; I was not able to containe my selfe . Happen what may happen ; Come what will come ; all was one to me . I said to my selfe ; Audaces fortuna iuuat ; Fortune befriends braue spirits . Let the worst come to the worst ; fall backe , or fall edge , I was sure to pay for it only in my person , and not in my goods , either moueable , or vnmoueable ; for it was not Gods will , that I should haue any land of mine owne , whereon to settle my selfe , and make my certaine abode ; nor any Se-mouentes , such things as could moue of themselues , and keep me company , whither-soeuer I should goe . My Lord was a great louer of your moyst Suckets , and such liquid Conserues , as they vse to bring from the Canaries in little Barrels , or from the Ilands of the Ter●…ras ; Which Barrels , when they were emptie , were throwne aside , and no reckoning made of them , lying here and there in euery corner as good for nothing . I had got me one of these , containing about halfe an a a Arroba , Is fiue and twentie pound weight . It is an Arabicke word , Errubun , which is a fourth part of the Verbe Rebbea , To part into foure parts . And according to this , an Arroba must be in weight , the fourth part of a hundred . It hath it's root from the Heb: Rubaat . Quadrum vel quarta pars . In liquidis , est apud Hispanos , octo açumbres . i. 8. ●…nophororum . Arroba , which seru'd me in stead of a Trunke , wherein I kept my Cardes , my Dice , Garters , Points , Cuffes , Handkerchiefes , and other things befitting a poore Page .

The Cardinall ( as he was sitting one day at dinner , ) commanded his Steward , that he should goe amongst the Merchants , and buy him some three or foure b b Quintal , A hundred pound weight . Centipondium . Quintals , of those that were the newest and the freshest , and but lately brought in . When I heard him say so , I began presently to cast about with my selfe , how I might make my selfe Master of one of these Barrels . The Cloth was taken away , the Cardinall risen , all gone to dinner : and whilest they were busie at their victuals , I got me into my Chamber , and in the twinkling of an eye , before you could well say This , I clapt me within that Barrell which I had , as many old rags , dust , grauell , or whatsoeuer other trash came first to hand , till I had fill'd it brim-full , and thrust it downe as hard as I could for my life to make it lie the closer . This done , on went the head , then the hoopes , making all fast and sure , so that it was now as handsomely fitted vp as heart could wish , and no man that should haue seene it , but would haue sworne ( it was so artificially handled ) that it had beene newly brought from the Indies stuft with roots of c c The Spanish word is , Escorzonera . This Herbe the Latines call Riperina . Of this you may reade at large in Couarruuias . Verbe Escorzonera . Guzman plots to play the thiefe . His craftie and cunning carriage . Tragopogum , or Goates beard , ( as some call it ) which is good against poyson .

When I had trimm'd it vp , and made it feat and fit , I let it alone , hauing still an eye , and standing as Sentinell , to watch what successe this proiect of mine might take .

Now , ( as good lucke would haue it ) behold , about the Euening I did des●…y two d d Mulo grande , y de hueso para litera , ò carga de repuesto . Couar . p. 108. Azemilas which came along laden with Conserues , who were no sooner entred within doores , but they were eased presently of their burthen . The Steward commanded the Pages to carry them into the Cardinals lodgings .

I had now a fight of Fortunes foretop , and boldly told her , You shall not goe from me , till I haue taken hold of your hayre . And as I was speaking , I tooke vp one of the Barrels and layd it vpon my shoulders , as the rest of my fellowes did , but lagging a little behinde , giuing them leaue to goe before me : as soone as I was come right ouer against mine owne chamber doore , I suddenly slipt in , when I saw the coast was cleere , and tooke out that other which I bare to my Lords lodging ; and so I made my three returnes , giuing a good account of all my lading .

When the last was come vp , I stood very soberly in the Hall , where my Lord Cardinall was , who said vnto me : What thinke you of this fruit ( Guzmanillo ? ) you cannot put in your hand here , your Wedges will not serue your turne . I reply'd to that point , & told him ; My good Lord ; Donde no valen 〈◊〉 , aprou●…chom vnnas . Where the Wedge nought preuailes , woe must make vse of our nayles ; if one thing will not doe the deed , another must . And though mine arme cannot get in , my hand may , and that 's enough for 〈◊〉 , I will desire no more .

Very good Sir ( said my Lord ) but as they are now , neither your arme , nor your hand will stand you in stead .

There lyes the skill , quoth I to my Lord ; for if they were otherwise 〈◊〉 to be opened , I would not care a button for them , there is no pleasure in such a●…ase . In matters of difficultie , your good wits come to their tryall , which onely shew themselues in things of great importance , and not in dri●…ing a nayle into the wall , or in pulling on of a paire of shooes , things easie to be done , and which naturally offer themselues vnto vs at the first sight .

●…ist thou me so ( quoth my Lord ? ) well , I will once set your wits a wor●…g . If within these eight dayes you shall shew your selfe so nimble-witted , as to 〈◊〉 one of these from me , I will bestow it on thee for thy labour , and thou shalt haue another besides into the bargaine : But if thou shalt faile therein , thou shalt then binde thy selfe to receiue such punishment , as shall bee agreed vpon .

My Lord , said I ; eight dayes , why , eight dayes is a mans life ; it is time inough of conscience . The businesse will be too long a doing ; and it may be , by putting it off to so large a time , we may either grow cold in the bargaine , or the memory of it dye , and be no more thought vpon .

I accept the fauour offered mee by your Lordship , and if to morrow by this time I shall not finish this businesse , I shal willingly resigne vp my selfe into the Secretaries hands , to be punished at his discretion ; Because I assure my selfe , that he would willingly haue the tawing of me , that he might reuenge himselfe vpon me for the late passage that I put vpon him to his great grie●…e : for the sent of the Pitch is not yet gone from him , nor his haires come againe .

My Lord laught , and so did they that were about him . And thus the bargaine was driuen betweene vs for the next day following . But because I was already on the fore-hand , and was well assured of the businesse , I could , if I would , haue presently cleered my selfe of this debt , but I was willing to let the bond runne on , till the time it was due .

The boord was couered , and my Lord was now set downe to dinner , feeding on such things at first , which I brought in , to procure him the better appetite to his meate ; and looking me in the face , he smilingly said vnto mee , Guzmanillo , it is but a little now to night ; That come , your time is past . What will you giue me now to be freed of your bargain ? Master Nicolao hath rods in pisse for you , and is prouided for your paiment . And me thinks that he is plotting , how he may be reuenged of thee , and thou , how thou maist satisfie thy selfe vpon him . If I might aduise , my counsell should be , that hee should not deale with thee , not so much for thy sake , as his owne . Whereunto I answered ; I am sure ( my Lord ) that my punishment is in the Secretaries hands : But I am not yet sure that the Conserues are in mine . Yet if I had store of money to set vpon this cast , and had ought to lose more then the poorenesse of my person , I would venture it all for this once , because I am very confident of my Chance .

Thus dinner past on till the last course was almost ended , and ready to bee taken away ; at which time , I went to the Court-cupboord , and taking from thence a Siluer-plate , I fill'd it with the Conserues of that barrell which I had stolne , and therewith I came to the Table , and set them downe before his Lordship .

When my Lord saw , what I had brought him , he blest himselfe , and began to wonder much at the matter , for he himselfe had the barrels in his owne custodie , they were within his owne lodgings , and there he kept them ( as he thought ) safe inough . He would trust no body with them , in regard of the bargaine that was driuen betweene vs : He kept the key himselfe ; he bore it alwaies about him . At last he cals the Chamberlaine vnto him , and wils him to goe in , and to count the Barrels , and to see if any of them were opened , or ill-conditioned .

He went in , and finding them both in number and place , to be iust the same as at their first putting in , he came forth againe , and told his Lordship the tale was whole and intire , not a barrell that was missing , and that they were sound and well-conditioned , and not the least suspition to be had ( for ought that hee could perceiue ) amongst them all , no not so much as the least hayre of his head . Ah , ah , ah , said my Lord , this tricke will not serue your tu●… ▪ this is a very poore one . Thou would'st make vs beleeue , that thou hast taken that out of one of the Barrels , which thou hast bought with thy money .

With that he turned himselfe towards the Secretarie , and told him , Domine Nicolao , I astigne Guzmanillo ouer vnto you , to doe what you list with him , and to punish him as you thinke fit , for that he hath lost his wager .

The Secretary made answere , May it please your Lordship to take the correction of him into your owne hands , and to dispose of him as you please ; for I for my part will haue no more to doe with him , I will not come neere him , nor his shadow , I dare not ; I haue had too much of him already : And if I should now tickle vpon a new score , and make him pay for the old and this together , I should gaine nothing by the reckoning ; for I hold him to bee of that vnhappy and dangerous , both wit and nature , that he would in reuenge conuey the next time a nest of Hornets into my breeches , or some other venemous vermine , that should either poison me , or sting me to death . And therefore if your Lordship put him ouer vnto me , and leaue his punishment to my discretion , I freely absolue him thereof , and am willing to imbrace his friendship .

I haue not as yet ( said I ) offended in that degree , that I had need of absolution . Where there is no matter to worke vpon , it is needlesse to seeke to introduce a forme . I am as good as my word , and haue performed what I promised ; the wager is mine , I haue wonne it . And if this bee not true that I speake , and that I make it not plainly to appeare vnto you , punish me at your pleasure , I aske no fauour at your hands . De que siruen las palabras , donde ay Prouerb . ●…bras ? What need words , where there are Workes ? I say , and say it againe , and that confidently , that this Conserue is of that which was brought in yesterday ; and not onely this , but a whole Barrell thereof is now at this present whole and vntoucht in my chamber , saue this little that I haue set before his Lordship .

The Cardinall crost himselfe , and wondred how this should be . And vntill dinner was done , and the table taken away , he did nothing else but blesse himselfe with both his hands . And being desirous to bee certified of the truth thereof , he rose vp , and went into his lodging to bee an eye-witnesse of it himselfe . He lookt vpon all the Barrels , whereon he had set certaine markes , he found them faithfull and true the number full and iust , the key in his owne custody , and could not deuise how this should be .

Herevpon he did verily beleeue , that I had bought a barrell of the very same Conserues , as his were , and said vnto me ; Guzmanillo , doest not thou thy selfe know , that thou broughtest in thus many hither ? count them now , and see if they be not right . I did so ; And when I had done telling , I told him ; My Lord , heere is the full number . Pero de lo contado , come el lobo . But it is like the Shepheards numbring of his Sheepe ; whereof , when he hath cast Prouerb . vp his reckoning , he shall finde that the Woolfe hath met with one of them by the way . I see they are well , but not all so well as they should be . And that you may see I tell you no lye , let that be brought hither which is in my Chamber , and let this be opened that stands there , and you shall finde that I haue changed the one for the other .

They opened it , whereby they discouered as well the truth , as the wit I had vsed therein . For the dust , the grauell , the old ragges , and the like trumperie which I had fill'd it withall , did manifest as much .

They remained all , as men amazed , not knowing what to thinke of it , nor being able for their liues , to imagine how this should be brought about . They did all aske me the question , but I would not acquaint any of them with it : But presently besought his Lordship , that he would be pleased to performe his promise with me . He did so . So that I had that and one more , which were two in the whole .

And because they should know that I carried a Noble minde , as it was deliuered to me with the one hand , so I gaue it with another to my fellow-Pages , who diuided it amongst them . And howbeit my Lord was some-what offended at the finenesse of my theft , yet he did much more wonder at my liberalitie , and thought the better of me for this my free disposition . He was much afrayd of these cunning and subtill tricks of mine , and questionlesse would haue then put me away , but that he was so good and holy a man ; and therefore considered with himselfe ; If I should now cast off this yong fellow , some great mis fortune will befall him , by reason of his mis-demeanour . These things that he hath done heere in mine owne house , are but idle tricks of his youth , and I am ne'reawhit the poorer for them . It is lesse harme that hee should hurt me in a little , then through want , offend others in much . And out of this apprehension , he did ( the better to dissemble what was past ) make of this Vice a Vertue . And it is great wisedome in any man , when a hurt may be healed , for to cure it ; and to remedy those things that may bee remedied : if not , to dissemble it the best he can . He made himselfe merry with it : And as often as any Princes and great Lords came to visit him , as occasion was offered , he would not sticke to make report thereof vnto them .

CHAP. IX .

Guzman de Alfarache treats of Charitie : Discourseth of Masters , kinde , and vnkinde : Telleth of another theft of Conserues . His exercises , and distastes , being a Page . He recounteth the tricks he vsed at Primera . That it is good to know play ; but better not to vse any gaming at all . And how for playing hee was put out of the Cardinals seruice . And how proud-ignorance is the cause of all euill .

THe Ordination of Charitie ( howbeit I haue pointed at it heretofore ) had its first beginning from God . Next in Charity , and its 〈◊〉 . order follows that of Fathers and Mothers , then of children , and after them of seruants ; who if they be good , are more to be made of , and to be better beloued , then children that are bad . And because my Lord had no children , he did dearely loue those that seru'd him , and was very tender ouer them ; placing ( next after God , and his Image , which is the poore ) all his loue vpon them . The poore are Gods own image . The fruits of Charitie .

He was generally charitable towards all men ; as being the first fruit of the Holy Ghost , and the first fire that inflameth mans soule . It is the prime good of all other goodnesse , that flowes from our actions ; it is the first beginning of a happy ending . It containes in it Faith and Hope ; it is the way that leades to Heauen ; it is the bond that binds God vnto Man ; it is the worker of Miracles ; it is the scourge of Pride ; and the fountaine of Wisedome .

My Lord did desire so much my amendment , as if his owne had lyen vpon it . He sought to oblige me vnto him by loue , that he might not affright mee with feare . And for to try , if he could reduce me to a vertuous course of life , he did ( that he might remoue from me all occasion of longing ) regalar me at his owne Table , feeding me from his owne Plate with all the choysest dainties and delicacies , and with all manner of sweet Meates : there was not the thing that he did eate of , whereof I had not my share , telling mee in gentle tearmes ; Guzmanillo , I giue thee this , to be at truce with thee , in token of peace and amitie : Behold that I , as well as my Secretarie , will hold no contention with thee . Content thy selfe with this morsell , whereby I acknowledge my selfe to be thy Vassall , bestowing this vpon thee by way of Tribute . This would he smilingly vtter , and with a pleasing countenance , without respect L●…ing Masters . of whosoeuer sate at Table with him , were they neuer so great persons , or of what qualitie or condition soeuer . Hee was a maruelous kinde Gentleman , he treated , and esteemed his seruants well , he fauoured , and lou'd them exceedingly , doing for them as farre as his abilitie would reach , so that all of them did loue him with their very heart and soule , and did doe him all true and faithfull seruice . For without all doubt , the Master that respecteth his seruants , is wel serued by those seruants : and if he pay them well , they will deserue their payment : but if he be louing and kinde withall , they adore him as a God . Whereas on the contrary , if a Master be proud , a bad Pay-master , & vnthankfull to his seruants , he shall neither haue truth , nor loue from them . They neither serue him with feare , nor entertaine him Bad Masters . with their loue . He is abhorred , hated , scorned , made a common by-word in the Market-place , in the streets , in the Tribunals , and euery publike Assembly , discredited by all men , and defended by none .

If Masters did but know , how much it did import them , to haue good and honest seruants , they would spare the meat out of their owne bellies , to bestow it vpon them ; for they are true riches indeed ; and hee that hath a good seruant , hath a great lewell . And it is impossible , that a seruant should be diligent , with that Master that is not louing vnto him .

There were brought to my Lord from Genoa certaine Boxes of Conserues , very great and large , they were richly gilded , and curiously wrought vpon the Guzmans other theft of Conserues , with the story thereof . top , as possibly could be desired , they were fresh and faire to looke to , as being but newly finished ; which Boxes vpon the way had taken a little wet . When they were brought before him , it did me good to looke vpon them , and the rather , for that they were made and sent him by a kins-woman of his , who did ordinarily vse to send him such kinde of dainties . I was not in the house when they came , and while I was lacking , they entred before my returne into a consultation , what they should doe with them , and how , and where they were best to drie them , that they might haue a safe conduct from my person , that I might not seaze vpon them : And the rather , for they must be forced to lay them abroad in the Sunne , which would haue runne some danger , if they had clapt them vp close in that a a An Vrne is an earthen Pitche ▪ , wherein the Romanes inclosed as in a Coffin the Ashes of the dead . Urne , wherein Iulius Caesars ashes were put . Euery one broached his opinion , but not one good one amongst them all . My Lord himselfe lighted vpon one , and said ; It matters not much , to studie for a place , where to keepe them safe ; if we giue the keeping of them to one , that will looke well vnto them , they will that way be safe , and no way else .

They did all allow of my Lords reason ; And as soone as I came in , his Lordship call'd me vnto him , and said ; Guzmanillo , what were we best to doe with these Conserues , which are come thus wet , that we may preserue them from being spoyl'd ? The best course ( my Lord ) said I , in my poore opinion , is to eate them presently .

And durst thou aduenture ( quoth he ) to eate them all ? I answered ; It were no great matter so to doe , if a man had time enough . But I am not so great a glutton , that now at this present I dare to venture alone vpon so great and honourable a Muster as is here made before me .

My pleasure then is ( said he ) that thou looke vnto them , and keepe a true reckning of them , laying them out euery day abroad in the Sunne . And here is no euasion for you , for they shall be deliuered vnto you by tale , and by tale I will looke you shall returne them vnto me . Here you see them layd open before you , and how faire and full they be ; and if any harme come vnto them , or ought be missing , I shall easily know where the fault lies , and call you to account for it .

I told him , that I was neither master of my selfe , nor them : I knew not what to doe in this case , I was not mine owne man ; I had not power ouer my selfe ; and that I was one of Eue's sonnes ; and that being put into such a Paradise of Conserues , the Serpent of the flesh might tempt me to eate of this forbidden fruit .

His Lordship reply'd then againe , and told me ; See ( sirrah ) that you looke well to your charge ; for I will expect , that you giue them me , as I giue them you : I must not haue a piece missing , neither in number nor in weight , qualitie for qualitie , quantitie for quantitie , all whole and sound , or else you shall see what will come of it , and therefore I would wish you to looke well what you doe , and to vse your best care .

I then made bold to tell him ; The Plea ( my Lord ) that is betweene vs , depends not on this point ; this is not the hinge , whereon it hangeth ; For to returne them vnto you as they are , without finding any missing , or perceiuing any hurt they haue taken , that is a very easie thing , I can doe that presently . But it is another point ( my Lord ) that I stand vpon . What point I pray ( say's my Lord ? ) I told him ; I put my selfe into great perill ; for I am priuy to mine owne inclination and weaknesse , no man should better know mine owne abilitie and strength then my selfe , and therefore ( to deale plainely with your Lordship ) if you will haue me to comply with your Lordships command , if my life lay on it , I shall not be able to hold my hands , I must needs taste of them , if not fill my belly .

My Lord maruelling much at me , Well ( quoth he ) seeing it will be no otherwise , I will for once make tryall how discreetly you will behaue your selfe ; I shall see by this , what manner of man you be . I giue thee therefore free liberty , that thou eate as much as thou hast a minde to for once , and no more , and that one time , I allow thee to fill thy belly as full as thou wilt thy selfe ; but with this condition , that thou deliuer them vp afterwards vnto me , without any defect or fault ; and in case the contrary shall appeare , thou shalt make me satisfaction in such payment , as I shall be pleased to appoint .

I accepted of the condition of this Obligation ; and thereupon they were all deliuered vp into my hands .

The next day following , I layd them out in the Sunne , in an open walke , and amongst the rest of these sweet-meates , there was one of the flowers of Oranges and Limons , which offred it selfe to my view , it lookt very louingly vpon me , as if it did desire to be better acquainted with me , and I who was loth to be behinde hand in matter of courtesie , made towards it , tooke it in my hand , & with a little knife that I had about me , loosening those little tacks with which it was fastened beneath , and heauing it vp daintily by degrees , till I had turn'd it vp-side downe , and that the lid lay downward , with that very knife , I tooke out almost the one halfe , from forth the bottome of it , returning to make it fast againe as before , putting in place of the Conserues so much waste Paper , cut out so iust to the same measure and proportion , that no man was able to perceiue it .

My Lord that night being minded to make a collation , I brought to his boord foure of the said Boxes , and asked him when I set them downe , whether I had not looked well vnto them ? He told me ; if the rest be like vnto these , he was well contented with them . Whereupon I brought them all before him , and he was very well pleased when he saw them , because they were much dryer then they were before , and better conditioned . With that I presently stept aside , to goe fetch a Plate , and on it I brought him all that I had stolne ; for in very deed I had not tasted thereof the quantitie of a Nut , hauing only done it for the ostentation of my wit .

When he lookt vpon it , he ask't me ; What 's this ? I told him ; I now deuide with your Lordship , part of my theft . He reply'd ; I will'd thee , that thou shouldst fill thy selfe , and not filch : And therefore now you haue lost .

I answered , I haue neither fill'd my selfe with it , nor so much as tasted what it is , nor doe I thinke that I haue lost by doing of this ; for this is that , wherewith I meane to fill my belly . Besides , all that was stolne out of the Box , is yet whole , and intire , as you may very well perceiue ; but if , because I haue shew'd my selfe honest , I must suffer for it , which way shall I walke to goe right , if you barre me of the path wherein I ought to tread ? My punishment does not trouble me , nor does it grieue me that I haue lost , as long as I am perswaded I haue wonne , howsoeuer I may be ouer-borne . But I will be wiser the nex●…time , and be sure to lose no more vpon the like match .

Nay ( Guzmanillo ) bee not angry ( said my Lord ) I would not thou shouldst grieue or complaine for this , I confesse I haue done thee wrong , and haue blamed thee without a cause ; but I prythee tell me ( said hee ) out of which of all these Boxes didst thou take this forth ? I put forth my hand , and told him ; This is it ( my Lord ) and I shew'd him how and which way I did it .

Hee was well pleased with the subtilnesse of my wit , but hee could haue wisht that I had not had so much finenesse in me , for he was afraid , lest one time or other , I would mis-imploy it to my greater hurt . Hee willed me to take the Boxe notwithstanding for my paines , and to carry it away with mee .

Many such things as these came from me ; and he tooke pleasure both in them and me , as being sleights of the hand , vsing these iuggling trickes more for sport then harme . If any of my fellowes should chance to fall asleepe , when he should waite and giue attendance ; they might the next day goe buy them new shooes and stockings , for a a The Spanish word is , Libramiento de çera . A Flye made of Waxe burning , which Pages put on the shooes of those that sleepe . Flyes of waxe were sure to be their Cocks to wake them . Our exercise , was euery day two houres in the morning , and two in the Euening , to heare our Schoole-master reade vnto vs , of whom I learned ( for the time that I studied there ) the Latine tongue ; which I had reasonably perfect , I had a little Greeke too , and some Hebrew . The rest of that vacant time , which wee had from seruing of our Master ( which was , God knowes , very little ) wee bestowd in reading of bookes , telling of tales , and in gaming . If we went forth a doores at any tine , it was only to coozen the b b What a Bun̄olero is , I haue margented else-where . Guzmans exercises being a Page . The distastes that Guzman had , whilest he was a Page . Bun̄oleros ; and amongst the Cookes our credit was very good for Pye-meate . We would goe a-nights to play the waggs with the Curtizans , and to exercise our wits vpon them , and to sing songs at their doores . And thus did I spend my time , till my beard began to bud .

And howbeit it may seeme perhaps to thee , a life of entertainment ; and full of mirth , yet it was to me as if I had beene ty'de to a stake , with a collar of iron about my necke , exposed to shame . All this was as a stinke in my nose ; none of these things could content me ; night and day I did sigh for the losse of my former delights .

But when I once began to write Man , and was able to girt a Sword to my side , I would haue beene glad of any augmentation of honour , whereby I might haue gained some hope to haue proceeded farther . And I verily perswade my selfe , that if my Actions had deseru'd it , I should not haue wanted the meanes .

But in stead of getting iudgement , and doing things that were vertuous , for to gaine mens good wils , and thereby to binde them vnto me , I fell to gaming , Guzmans tricks at Primera . euen to the losse of my cloathes from my blacke ; and as I was some-what of the freest , so was I too liberall in my play .

I made it my study , to benefit my selfe by all tricks and cheating deuices , that I could inuent or learne ; and especially when I plaid at Primera . How often when I went vpon two Cards , would I take three , and conueying fiue now and then into my hand , would set vp my rest vpon the three best ? How often would I take the last Card , and clapping it vnderneath , would see whether it were good for me or no , and in an instant looke on the other already seene , and then make my best aduantage of them , which was all one , as if I should haue robb'd a man vpon the high-way ? How often would I haue a c c The Spanish word is Diacono , which though it properly signifie a D●… , yet it is ●…ken more largely for any one that ministers helpe to a man . Couarruuias verb. Diacono friend sit by me , which should seeme as if he were asleep , and should supply me with Cards vnder the boord to serue my turne ? How often had I a Copesmate that stood by , looking vpon the others games , who would tell mee what Cards they went vpon , and what their game was ? all which he signified vnto me by such secret and cunning signes , that it was impossible for them to finde it out . How often would I so set and packe the Cards , that I would deale to him that playd against me two and fifty , and hauing an Ace to helpe me , would make my selfe fiue and fifty , or else with a fiue incounter foure and fifty , and so either winne the Game by one peepe , or by the elder hand ?

Now when we were two against one , and plaid bootie , and dealt the Cards one to another , how often taking the discarding Card , and clapping it on the top , would we play on till we could make our aduantage of it ? how by a beck or a nod , did we know how the world went ? how to shuffle and mixe the Cards so , as to make our game sure ? how to set some priuy marke or signe vpon them , whereby to know them ? how to know them by the corners , being bigger or lesse , and a thousand the like , which wee made good vse of either by the helpe of a stander by that shared with vs , or by corrupting him that sold the Cards , which are ordinarie things ? O how many lewd prankes did I play in that kinde ? how many rogueries ? how many villanies ? there was not that cheating or coozening tricke , which I was not acquainted withall and had at my fingers ends . And as I was perfect in the knowledge of them , so did I put them in practise when time serued . For such is the blindnesse of play , that those that are crafty and cunning in their gaming , haue a large field wherein to expatiate themselues , and to shew their skill .

And if it might be lawfull ( I say , lawfull ) that as in the Common-wealth , houses of sinne are permitted , for the auoiding of greater inconueniences ; there were appointed in euery principall Citie or Towne , Masters of this coozening and cheating Science , of whom , those that are addicted and giuen to play , might be taught and instructed , it were very good for the auoiding of deceit , and many a Gentleman would not be so easily fool'd out of their money and meanes , as now they dayly are . For our Sensualitie suffers it selfe easily to be ouer come by Vice , and that is turn'd to an ill habit , and becomes a bad custome in the end , which at first was inuented for a lawfull exercise , and to passe away the time . And with reason may it be called a bad custome , when it shall be disorderly followed , and that men are too much wedded to gaming , altering the true intent and meaning thereof , and putting it out of its right byas .

Gaming was first of all inuented for the recreation of mans minde , and Gaming , made onely for recreation . for the refreshing of him himselfe , when he found himselfe wearied with the troubles and turmoyles which accompany this life ; and when it breaketh this rule , and passeth beyond its due bounds , it is wickednesse , infamy , and theft . For it seldome hapneth , that it is not attended with these Attributes .

I speake of those that are profest Gamesters , who make their liuing of it , as a man would doe of an Office or a Trade , and make a continuall practise of it . Notwithstanding , I could heartily wish , and it is one of my most earnest desires , that those would leaue it off , and giue ouer this excesse of play , which are of the nobler sort , considering the hurt which may insue thereupon , especially Gaming , to be shun'd by Noblemen and Gentlemen ; and wherefore ? seeing that ill is ballanced with good ; and that if hee winne , and the other lose , he is bound to giue the loser leaue to speake ; to indure many bold and intemperate actions ; to beare with many indiscreet both words and deeds , and other strange kinde of gestures , and vnciuill behauiour , which he is tyde to suffer , onely as he is a winner , not as he is a man of honour , who in things of another nature , will risent the least wrong that is done vnto him Other things there are of like qualitie with these , which I dare not presume to presse any farther , that not onely for them , and those already mentioned , they ought to abhorre gaming , but euen those houses and Ordinaries , where Play is maintained .

But being that our appetite is so vnbridled , and our naturall inclination there-vnto so exorbitant , that it cannot in this kinde altogether containe it It is good to know play . And why ? selfe , it shall not be amisse , but rather good and fitting , that a yong man should know the Lawes of play , learne the skill thereof , and vnderstand all the tricks , and cheatings that are vsed therein , that he may perceiue when he meets with a Cony-catcher . And if such cheating companions once begin to lose , and that their metall melts away from them , let him powre the rest of his owne moneys into his Bootes , Breeches , Hand-wrest , Collar , Girdle , Bosome , Sleeues , or any other part about him , whether he can cleanliest conuey it , that he may not lose his money like a beast . For besides the getting of it from him , they will laugh at him when they haue done . One thing I was euer carefull to obserue ; I would neuer sit downe to play with a little money , nor for a little , nor with that man that would not aduenture to get much , playing my mony freely , without either offering , or taking of wrong .

Well , I was so wholly giuen to gaming , and spent so much time therein , that I committed many faults . Nor is it possible , that a Gamester should performe A Gamester cannot serue and attend his Master as he should . those duties which belong vnto him , much lesse he that serues , and is ty'de to attendance . Neither doe I know that Master that will giue bread to that seruant that is a Gamester . For if he manage his Masters affaires , and haue either moneys of his in his hands , or other his goods committed to his charge , and that he chance to lose his owne , hee will play then vpon his Masters purse , hoping to recouer himselfe ; and if peraduenture hee continue still on the losing hand , and hath not afterwards wherewithall to pay , hee runnes himselfe into greater danger then before , thinking that lucke will turne , and so come to relieue his losses . But say , he is not trusted with any thing of his Masters , nor hath any thing of his to loose ; yet is it not possible , that he should assist at those houres , when he ought to doe him seruice , nor will he be in the way to be found , when need shall require , as it hapned to my selfe .

My Lord was greiued thereat to the very soule , nothing could preuaile with me , neither admonitions , nor perswasions , nor words , nor promises , to remoue The Cardinall shews himselfe a ●…d and louing Master . this euill custome from me . And being one day ( in my absence ) with his houshold-seruants about him , he told them , how well he wisht mee , and the great desire that he had of my good . And seeing that I could not be reclaimed by faire means , his purpose was by some one deuice or other to bring me to be a reformed man . And the plot was , that by discharging me from his seruice and putting me out of his house for some certaine dayes , it might be , that calling my lewd courses to minde , and seeing mine owne errours in the end , I might come to a truer feeling of my misery , and by that meanes bee drawne to amendment of life : yet would he not , that my allowance should be taken from me , lest for want of meanes , I might through necessitie be driuen to doe some dishonest act or other . O how singular a vertue was this in so great a Prince ! how worthy of eternall praise , & how fit to be imitated by all those , that desire to be well and truely serued ! And certainly , it is impossible , but that seruants ( vnlesse they be such as I was ) would be willing to lay down a thousand liues ( if they were Masters of so many ) to giue but any the least content to such kinde and louing Masters .

Well , I was driuen by this meanes to my shifts , and wanted meat to put in my mouth . O Lord , let it euer be in my Letany , that thou wilt deliuer mee Want of food causeth much euill . from this euill . Other wants haue some trouble with them . But when a man hath a good stomake , and wanteth meat , is extreme hungry , and hath not where-withall to fill his Maw ; to see the houre of eating come , and he to remaine fasting ; to passe ouer the day from morning to night , and not to finde whereon to feed ; these ( I say ) are such things , as would make a man doe any thing , be it neuer so dishonest ; Cloakes , Hats , and all walke then , ( though it be but for halfe they are worth , what shift so euer we make to come by other .

This miserie befell me , and that in a very troublesome time : For hauing spent a whole day and night in play , and hauing lost all the money that I had , Guzman playes away his cloaths . and when that was gone , all my cloathes , hauing nothing left me to couer my nakednesse , but a poore thin Doublet , and a paire of white linnen Drawers , when I saw my selfe in this poore taking , I retyred my selfe into my Chamber , not daring for shame to come abroad .

And albeit I would willingly haue faign'd my selfe sicke , I could not doe it ; for my Lord was so carefull of his seruants health , and that they should haue all things necessarie and fitting for them , that hee would presently haue sent for Physicians to see what I ayled . Besides , I saw it was a needlesse remedy , to vse any such dissimulation ; for by this time it had past from mouth to mouth , how , and in what case I was , and what was the cause of my griefe .

Now though that I had beene wanting so many dayes from the seruice of his Table , yet would he still aske and inquire what was become of me , and where I was that I did not wait ? He could not indure Tale-carriers , nor such as would complaine of their fellowes , and make things worse then perhaps they were , by mis-reporting of them ; he did hate it to the death , to haue his house , like your Lawyers Courts , full of clamours , and vntruths ; and therefore that they might not grieue or disquiet him , they would mildly tell him : Hee is heere ( Sir ) about the house , I saw him but now , or some such like excusiue answere . But this would not serue the turne . For now he began shrewdly to suspect , lest some mis-fortune had befalne me . And therefore pressing them hard to acquaint him where I was , and how I spent my time , they were forced ( for the giuing of his Lordship satisfaction ) to deliuer vnto him the truth of the businesse .

This euill inclination of mine did much afflict his Lordship , when he saw how dissolutely , without either feare or shame , I proceeded on in my lewd courses . Wherevpon , to put his former proiect in practise , he gaue order that I should haue some new cloathes made me , and that then they should presently dismisse me , and rid me out of both his house and seruice , accordingly as he had formerly ordered the businesse .

So his Steward cloathed me , and then turn'd me out of doores . Which I tooke in that foule scorne ( holding it as a due debt , that my Master was still Guzman hath new cloathes giuen him , and is turn'd out of doores . bound to keepe and maintaine me , and to beare with all faults ) that in a kind of ●…ullen and dogged fashion , ( shewing more stomake , then wit ) I left the house , with a full resolution neuer , ( come what would come ) to returne thither againe , of all other places in the world ; notwithstanding that I had receiued many messages from the Cardinall , at sundry times , and by seuerall messengers , with many goodly offers , and faire promises , deliuering vnto me the end why all this was done , and that there was no other drift in it in the world , saue onely what should make for mine owne good ; thinking by this meanes , when I had champt a little vpon the bit , and tasted what hardnesse was , and knowne the losse of so good a Master , I would haue reform'd my manners , reclaim'd my selfe from my lewd courses , and proued afterwards a better seruant , then euer I had beene before . They also signified vnto me , how much his Lordship lou'd me , and what he had spoken of me in my absence . But all would not doe ; they could neuer get me backe againe . For I was stiffe and obstinate , and too foolishly selfe-will'd ; thinking that I should reuenge my selfe in so doing ; and so as I might spight them , I did not care Proud ignorance , and selfe-will , much hurteth yong men . how I sped my selfe . I brew'd ill , and bak't worse ; I began in pride , and ended in folly . And what could follow thereupon but my miserie and ruine , seeing that I was vnthankfull for those fauours and benefits , which God had been pleased to bestow vpon me by the hands of that good and holy man my Master , who had iustly giuen me my doome , and pronounced this sentence of expulsion against me . For he that cannot be wonne with good workes , nor moued with faire and gentle words , it is pitie but he should smart for it , and that rigour and chastisement should worke that vpon him , which rewards and faire vsage , were not able to effect . I had now quite lost those little wits that I had , making little or no account of all these things , as if I had wanted nothing . How did I scorne and contemne those many good things that were done for me , without any why or wherefore , being things beyond the reach of my capacitie , vnbefitting my seruice , and altogether vnworthy of me by reason of my vnthankfulnesse ? How vnwise was I in conseruing that present good , and in seeking to increase the hope of farther fauours , which vndoubtedly I should haue futurely receiued , if I had but indeuoured to deserue them ? How forgetfull was I of that kindenesse , wherewith I had beene cured ? How vnmindefull of the care , that was taken about me ? How vngratefull to that charity which was vsed towards me ? How carelesse of that diligence , wherewith I was taught ? How stubbornly proud , against that mildenesse , wherewith I was admonished ? How peruerse , against those sweet words , wherewith I was perswaded ? How deafe against those graue yet louing tearmes , wherewith I was reprehended ? How surly against that patience , by which I was supported ? How incorrigible against that fauour , by which I was defended ? How rebellious against those meanes , which were sought for my good ? How vncapable of that good vsage , wherewith I was treated ? How neglectfull in amending those faults , which for my sake were so kindely dissembled ? If any of those two , that tooke me for their sonne , had beene aliue , nay , if they were both now abiding here vpon earth , and might returne to their former prosperitie , they could not haue done more for me , or with more loue , or would haue borne halfe so much with my so many , and preiudiciall knauish prankes , which I did so dayly , and so disorderly play , and with that liberty and freenesse , as if I had not beene in my Lords , or my Fathers house , but in mine owne . I was more bold in his presence , then I should haue beene amongst my equals , and he imitating God in the sweetnesse of his disposition , had the patience to beare with me .

Certaine I am , that he that begat me , would haue abandoned and abhorred me , so wearie would he haue growne of my ill gouernment . But my Lord was so good a man , that he was neuer weary of me , neuer angry , neuer offended with me , and would not haue cast me off ( had not I cast off my selfe ) because he lou'd me .

O the noble and Princely condition of this worthy Prelate , giuen him by inheritance from that true Father of loue and goodnesse , that he could be so kinde-hearted , in doing still more and more good to such a one as I was ! He looked still when I should returne vnto him , he tarried for me , a day , a weeke a moneth , a yeere , nay many yeeres ; in all which time , he was not wanting to exercise his workes of mercy towards me , to the end , that he might leaue me without excuse : And that touch't at last with shame of mine owne folly , I might pronounce that sentence against my selfe , which the heynousnesse of mine offences had deserued .

But I for all this followed mine owne humour , which was the rule by which I directed all my actions : To all that was said vnto me , I put on Merchants Orejas de mercader . i. Deafe eares . A Prouerb . eares , was still deafe to all good counsell , appealing from good aduice , to mine owne flesh , which being ready still at hand in fauour of my vices , I did vtterly vndoe my selfe , by following of her ill counsell . For to execute her suggestions , I had force enough ; to seeke out occasions of sinne , abilitie sufficient ; to perseuer in them , an vntyred constancie ; and in not leauing them , a firmenesse not to be remoued . I was as well acquainted with all manner of Vice , as I was a stranger to all kinde of Vertue . And to lay the fault vpon Nature , I haue no reason for it in the world . For I had no lesse abilitie for good , then inclination to euill . The fault was mine owne ; for shee neuer did any thing out of reason . Shee was alwaies the Mistresse of truth and modestie ; she was neuer defectiue in what was fitting , but as shee hath beene corrupted since through sinne ; and mine were so many , that I produced the cause of this bad effect , and became mine owne hangman .

CHAPTER X.

Guzman de Alfarache discourseth of ill Companie ; of Hospitalitie ; of Patience ; And how being put out of the Cardinals house , he placed himselfe with the Embassadour of France , where he playde some Knauish prankes . Hee relates a Storie , which he heard from a Gentleman of Naples . And ending with that , he giues an end to the first part of his life .

I Could not ( as I told you before ) iustly complaine ; or finde fault with any body but my selfe , that my Lord had thus dismist me , and turn'd me out of seruice . For the very truth was , he made earnest sute ( through the importunitie of his seruants , who were very instant with me ) to haue me to come backe againe vnto him ; but because my bloud ( whose heat was not yet allay'd ) still boyled in my brest , and was not come to its wonted coolenesse , I did ill consider mine owne good : or should rather haue sayd , That I did well , ill , in not considering my ill , well .

Being thus discarded , I wandred vp and downe at mine owne pleasure , ( as my fancie did lead me ) thorow the streetes of Rome . And because in my The conuersation of the wicked destroyeth the soule . prosperity , I had purchased some friends of mine owne profession , they seeing me vn-prouided for , and that I went vp and downe like a Masterlessehound , here one would inuite me , and there another , howbeit it cost mee deare ; for that meale that is made in ill company , though it giue nourishment to the body , yet it filleth the soule with ill humours , to its vtter ouerthrow and destruction . Nor did those good morsels so well satisfie hunger , as their ill counsell and lewd conuersation did vndoe me ; Whereof nothing now remaineth , but repentance . For I began then , ( and neuer till then ) to know in what danger I was , when I saw the water was come vp to my chinne , and ready to runne into my mouth .

Vices , come stealing in vpon a man , they enter with silence , they are a smooth still File , that cuts without any noyse ; they are not heard , till they haue wrought mans ruine . They are as easie to be receiued , as they are hard to be reiected .

And such kinde of friends as these , are those Bellowes , which kindle that flame , which sets the whole soule on fire , and with a little sparke raiseth a great blaze . I might very well haue recouered my allowance , and had meate of mine owne to put in my mouth ; for the Steward told me , that my Lord had giuen him order , that I should dayly come and fetch it , or send for it , as I would my selfe . But I was so obstinate , that I would none of it . For I was so lewdly giuen , that I had rather indure hunger with ill company , then feed vpon the best meat with honest and ciuill people . But they quickly payd me home , who first gaue me counsell to refuse my boord-wages , as I did , relying vpon them and their aduice ; for they were soone weary of helping me any longer , and they did not only not relieue me , but because they would not doe it , they did shunne and auoyd me . So that I might starue for any succour that I was to looke for from them .

This same thing , called Hospitality , and entertaining of friends and guests , Touching Hospitalitie . carries a kinde of mysterie with it ; I euermore found in his mouth that inuiteth , honie , but in his hands gall ; they promise liberally , but giue sparingly ; they bid with ioy , but eate with sorrow . Hee that will bee another mans guest , must be content to be ordred , as he will haue him ; besides , Guests , what manner of men they ought to be ? he must be rich and well to passe , other-wise he shall not be welcome ; he must not tread many steps in the house , his breech must scarce warme his Chayre , nor must he sit long at boord , for feare of being too troublesome . Doe not flatter thy selfe , that thou art liberally and freely welcome , because a man giues thee good words , and speakes kindely and louingly vnto thee , and tels thee thou art heartily welcome . For I haue euer obserued it as a true rule amongst other the Lawes of Hospitalitie , that a man may dyet with his kinsman The Lawes of Hospitalitie . a seuen-night , with his elder brother a moneth , with his friend a yeere , and with a bad Father all his life time .

The Father only is not weary perhaps of entertaining his sonne , but all the rest take dislike , if not a loathing of his company . If thou shalt stay with them beyond that time , they will hate thee to the death , and picke one quarrell or other against thee ; and if that will not serue the turne to set thee packing ; they will put crooked Pinnes in thy Bread , or lay baytes to poyson thee , that they may once be rid of thee .

But admit , that thou art inuited by a married man , and that his wife bee close-fisted , a very Crib , her wealth her owne , and she somewhat proud and scornefull , say she be thy Mother , or thy Sister , in fine she is a woman , who for the most part are all of them greedy and couetous , so that they will whine for anger to see thee there , looke scuruily vpon thee , grudge thee thy meat ; cha●…e with her husband for bringing thee thither , curse both him and thee , and wish you both choakt . Better is a hard crust in thine owne house , then a Better is a little at home , then a great deale of good cheere abroad . cram'd Capon in another mans . It is a miserable thing to set thy foot vnder another mans table .

My friends growing now weary of me , I needed not out of shame to leaue them ; for they had already cast me off , streightning more and more their hand towards me , who were so farre from giuing me any thing , that now they could shamefully deny me without blushing . They needed no maske nor disguise for to dissemble the businesse . They could boldly bid me Goe by . I was therefore driuen to seeke out some Wall , where-against to leane , and betake my selfe to some Tree for shelter , vnder whose shadow I might quietly take my feeding . For I was now in that extreme want , that like the Prodigall sonne , I would willingly haue returned home , and beene content with all my heart to be one of the meanest mercenary seruants in my Lords house . But such was my misfortune , that he was now dead and gone .

Beaten with the rod of affliction , I began to be humbled , and was fully resolued to turne ouer a new leafe , and betake my selfe to a better course of life : but it was all too late , I came a day after the faire ; And fit it is , that he that will not when he may , when he would , he should haue nay .

And it stands with very good reason , Que pierda por el mal qu●…rer , el bien poder . That throught the badnesse of will , we should lose the goodnesse of power . There went the distance of some two moneths betweene my good and bad fortune . And if I had beene a stay'd , and well-gouern'd Youth , as Want of patience , the cause of much euill . I had a running head , and a giddy braine , the least good that could haue befalne me , would haue beene ( though the meanest of his seruants ) an honest prouision during my life , and might haue runne the venture of some better fortune . But seeing it fell out as it did , yet must we thanke God as well for the bad , as the good . I cannot say , that my malignant Starre was the cause thereof , but that mine owne euill inclination was the worker of my woe ; For the starres non compellunt , sed inclinant , they incline , but not constraine . The Starres doe not inforce a man to this or that . They make men apt , but they doe not coact . Some ignorant fooles sticke not to say ; O Sir , Destinie is not to be auoyded . That which shall be , shall be . And it is in vaine to striue against it . I tell thee ( my friend ) it is a vaine thing to say so ; and thou doest not vnderstand the truth thereof aright ; for there is no necessitie , that it is , or should be so ; it is thou thy selfe , that mak'st it so to be .

In these Morall and outward things , thou hast a kinde of free-will conferred vpon thee , whereby thou maist ( if thou wilt ) gouerne both thy selfe , and thy actions . Thy starre cannot constraine thee , nor all the heauens ioyned together with all the force and power that they haue , cannot compell thee against thy will .

It is thou that forcest thy selfe to leaue what is good , and to apply thy selfe All euill that befalls a man , is for the most part occasioned by himselfe . Guzman serues the French Embassadour . to that which is euill , following thy dishonest desires , whence these thy crosses and calamities come vpon thee .

I was now entred into the seruice of the French Embassadour , with whom my Lord ( who is now in glory ) held strict amitie ; who , in his life-time tooke likewise great pleasure in my witty iests , and merry conceits . He would faine haue had me serue him before , but he was loth to intertaine mee , lest it might be taken vnkindly to receiue another mans seruant , considering the good loue and friendship that was betweene them .

Well , I was now with him , and he vs'd me well , but with a different end . For my Lord directed his actions to the profit and benefit of my person , but Masters intertaine their seruants for diuers ends . he onely for his owne priuate ends , and the pleasure which he tooke in my ierkes of wit , the merry tales that I would tell him , and the pleasing messages that I should bring him now and then , from those his Ladies and Mistresses to whom he made loue . He did settle me in no set place , or office about him ; I was his seruant at large ; and he as largely paid me . For either hee would giue me my paiment himselfe , or else I my selfe would take it in his presence , with some pleasant iest or other ; or to speake more plainely , I was his chiefe Minion and Fauorite , though it pleased some to call me his Buffone & Iester .

When we had any guests ( as we seldome or neuer wanted ) wee were very complementall with them , and waited punctually vpon them , our eyes still Guests how to be attended on by those that wait at the table . Foolish and presumptuous persons not to be obserued by those that attend . attending on theirs : but if they were either impudent , foolish , or troublesome guests , which came thither vnbidden , vpon such as these we would put a thousand iests . Some we would make to sit all dinner time without drinke , that you would haue thought , that they had been so many Melones sowne in a dry ground ; to others we would giue very little , and that in pinching glasses ; some had their Wine ouer-watered , other-some ouer-warme without any snow . When they were ready to eate their meat , we would take away their Plates from them , and set some salt-meats before them , ill seasoned , with a little oyle that was none of the best . We would dayly inuent new deuices , to abuse their palates , that they might take dislike , and come there no more .

It hapned once vpon a time , that an English-man claiming kindred of the Men of good and bad behauiour , to bee respected according as they are . A tale of an Englishman . Embassador , and it being a common custome with him , to come dayly to our house , my Master grew weary of him ; for ( besides that hee was not his kinsman ) he was neither Noble in his bloud , nor indued with good qualities , and aboueall , in his conuersation full of impertinencies , that it was a kind of captiuitie , to keepe conuersation with him .

There are a certaine kinde of men , that a mans heart will rise against them , and grow into a dislike of them , though he neuer saw them before . And againe there are another sort of men , that will steale thereinto , and thrust themselues into our affection , and good liking , vpon the first sight , winning our good will from vs , and procuring our best wishes ; this , either hatred , or loue , not being in the hands of the one , or the power of the other . But this was a meere lumpe of Lead , a man of no metall in the world , a dull and heauy piece of flesh , in a word a meere block-head .

One night , when they were newly set at supper , hee began to lay open his vanitie , with telling a thousand lyes one vpon the necke of another , wherewith the Embassador was much offended , and not being able to suffer such a one , to goe on in his fooleries , he spake to me in Spanish , ( which the other vnderstood not ) and said vnto me , Would I could bee rid once of this foole ; for I am as weary of him , as euer I can be . He did not speake this to a Dolt or an Asse : I had his meaning in the winde . Whereupon I tooke my friend to taske ; I followed him with salt-meats , that were smart and sharpe , and left behinde them a kinde of tartnesse or tang vpon the tongue ; wherewith being bitten , he call'd for his coolers , which he tooke almost faster then I could fill them .

The wine that he gulped downe , was the gulph that swallowed him vp . The glasse was great , his draughts answerable , and those often , and this powder tooke so well , that at last he was powdred with a witnesse , and quite blowne vp ▪

When I saw he had yeelded himselfe prisoner to his pots , and that hee was aboue one and thirty , being many peepes out , I tooke off one of my Garters , and knit a sliding knot vpon the instep of one of his feete , and fastened it vnto the stoole whereon he sate . And when the Table was taken away , and that he offered to rise to take his leaue , and to goe home to his lodging , he was no sooner risen from his seat , but that he fell all along on the floore , his mouth , his teeth , and his nose being shrewdly hurt , the bloud gushing out amaine . So that when he was come to himselfe the next day , and saw in what ill case he was , and how his face was batterd with the fall , for very shame hee would neuer more come neere the house .

This businesse was well carried , for it succeeded euen as I would haue it . But all darts doe not hit right ; nor all Angle-rods strike sure . There are some A tale of a Spaniard , who 〈◊〉 Guzman , and shewes himselfe a 〈◊〉 knaue , then hee . fishes that bite and carry away the bait with them , leauing the Angler deluded , and the Hooke empty , as it hapned vnto me with a Spanish Souldier , that was longer then the marke .

O the whoreson traytor ; how crafty and subtill a Rogue hee was ! how full of his cunning shifts ! Hearken well I pray vnto that which passed betweene vs .

This wily rascall came into the house about noone , when the Embassador was ready to sit downe to dinner , and comming vnto him , he told his Lordship that he was a Souldier , and borne in Cordoua , and a principall Gentleman of that place , though now he were in want , and therefore besought him , that he would fauour him so farre forth , as that he might taste of his bounty . The Embassadour tooke out a little purse , wherein were some Crownes , and without offering to open it , hee gaue him both the Purse and the Gold that was within it , because he seemed to be the same , he had exprest himselfe to be .

But not contenting himselfe with this , he continued still with him , recounting what he was , and the seruices wherein he had beene . And so running on from one thing to another , the Embassadour setting himselfe downe to dinner , he makes me no more ado , but does the like . And pulling a stoole to him , sets himselfe cheeke by iole with his Lordship .

I was then gone to fetch in meat , when lo , by the way , I might perceiue two other Ier-Falcons like the former , which were newly entred within the Court ; and when they vnderstood , that this other was at dinner with my Court Ier-Falcons what they be . Lord , the one said to the other ; As I am true Souldier , either the Diuell , or Sinne , hath clapt gyues vpon our legges ; for this cheating Rascall still gets the start of vs , and winnes all that he playes for by the elder hand .

When I heard them thus mutter and maunder against him , I came vnto them , and askt them ; Whether they knew that Gentleman within , or no ? One of them told me , I know that Tauerne-haunter , whose father hath many a time and oft pull'd on my Buskins in Cordoua , where hee keepes shop vnder the wall of the great Church .

This is our vnhappinesse , that if some twenty Gentlemen of vs goe for Italy , there returne a hundred such infamous fellowes as this is , that will equall themselues with the best , and boast themselues to be descended of the ancient Gothes : and when they come where they are not knowne , they thinke that with the gumming of their Mouchatos , making them beare vp as stiffe as if they were starcht , and with the wagging of three or foure feathers in their Hat , they are growne into noblenesse of bloud , and purchased the name of Valour , beeing no better then notorious Cowards . For it is not Feathers , and starcht-beards that fight it out in the Field , but stout hearts , and men of stiffe courage . Come , let vs goe , I will make this effeminate Raskall next time I meet with him , leaue off comming in our quarter , and fyle himselfe in some other ranke .

With that they went their wayes , whilest I went considering with my selfe , what kinde of cattle these three were , that thus sought to grace and set forth themselues .

But I was some-what angry at those other two , taking them to bee but Braggadoccios , and meere puffes , as well for the vaunts they made of themselues , as for the ill language they vs'd , in defaming him , who sought to honour himselfe , without any cost or preiudice to others .

I was likewise not a little moued against this new-come guest for his bold and insolent carriage , who might very well haue contented himselfe with that which was giuen him , and so gone his wayes , without being so impudent to sit downe at table in that swaggering and vnciuill fashion ; I had a moneths minde to be at him , I long'd to breake one iest or other vpon him , and to put it so home , that he should not be able to auoid it ; but thinking to goe forth to fetch Wooll , I was forced to come back with my fleece shorne , failing very much in this my intent and purpose . He intreated mee to giue him some drinke . I made as if I did not vnderstand him . He beckned vnto me with his hand . I drew neerer vnto him . He made me a third signe . I turn'd mine eyes another way , looking very demurely , and carrying with mee a sober and composed countenance , ( though I had much a doo to forbeare laughing . ) He looking well vpon me , and perceiuing that I either plaid the foole , or the knaue with him , he would not speake , or becken any more vnto me , but turning himselfe towards the Embassador , he thus said vnto him :

Sir , I beseech your Lordship , that you will not thinke it ouer-boldnesse , or too much presumption in mee , that I haue offered ( though vnbidden ) to sit downe at your Lordships Table in regard of those many excuses which I can render to your Lordship , which may ( if I haue offended therein , and broken the rule of good manners ) plead some-what in my fauour .

First , the qualitie of my Person , and the noblenesse of my House , doth deserue any common or ordinary courtesie .

Secondly , my being a Souldier , makes mee worthy of any Princes Table what-soeuer , because I haue purchased that honour by my Sword and profession .

And lastly , I may adde there-vnto the necessitie I now am in , which is common to all , and may befall any man , as well as my selfe .

And I presume that your Lordship keepes this so free and honourable a Table for to relieue such as my selfe ; and therefore conceiue , that your Lordship holds it not necessarie , that such Souldiers as my selfe , hauing any worth , or good parts in them , should expect to be inuited to your boord .

And therefore I shall desire your Lordship to be pleased to command one of your seruants to giue me some drinke ; for being a Spaniard , I perceiue they doe not vnderstand me , though I haue often called for it .

My Lord there upon commanded vs to giue him drinke , so that I could not otherwise choose but doe as I was bid ; yet I would haue sworne , hee should not haue thus gone away with the Bucklers .

Well , I brought him drinke , but in so poore and penurious a glasse , and mixed so much water with his Wine , that I left him in a manner as dry as hee was before . But because a little will serue a Spaniards turne , and that they are inured to suffer much hunger and thirst , with that little pittance , which was rather a drop , then a draught , he passed therewith as well as he could , till dinner was done .

We that were Pages , hauing conspired alltogether , not to looke him any more in the face while he was eating , lest he should speake againe vnto vs by signes , to giue him more drinke , and so binde vs to bring it vnto him . But he was an old beaten Souldier , and knew well how to vse the weapon of his wit , and being too hard for vs , did likewise beat vs from this ward , which we thought had beene too sure a one , to bee put from . For when hee had fill'd his belly , and well satisfied himselfe , and that the last course was serued in , And your Lordship will giue me leaue ( quoth he ) I will now goe drinke . And so rising vp from boord , remouing his stoole from him , he went to the Court-Cupboord , and taking from thence the biggest Glasse that was there , he powr'd forth as much Wine and Water as himselfe thought fit , and hauing quenched his thirst , putting off his hat , and making a legge to his Lordship , got him out of the roome , and so went his way without speaking any one word or other . My Lord was ready to burst with laughing , to see how hee had put me beside my tricke , and after that he had wondred awhile at the resolution and boldnesse of this fellow , he said vnto me ; Guzmanillo , this Souldier sauours somewhat of thee , and thy countrie , where all is carried away with Brauados , and an impudent kinde of behauiour .

Now , whilst we were talking at table of the libertie and free kinde of carriage , which the Spaniards assume vnto themselues , there was newly come into the house a Gentleman of Naples , who had no sooner saluted my Lord , but he told him , that he was purposely come vnto his Lordship to acquaint him with one of the cruellest , and strangest accidents , that hath hapned in these our times , which now very lately fell out in Rome .

The Embassadour intreated him to relate it vnto him ; And that I might the better heare it , I did deferre taking away , and brought him a Chayre , wherein , when he was set , he thus began to speake .

In this Citie , there dwelt a young Gentleman of the age of twenty or one A pitifull and lamentable A●…ident of two noble Louers in Rome . and twenty yeeres , more noble in bloud , then rich in wealth . He had a goodly presence ; he was vertuous , able , actiue , and in his owne person very valiant . This Gentleman fell in loue with a Damsell , a young Gentlewoman here in Rome , about the age of seuenteene ; being wonderfull both faire and honest ; they were both equall in state and condition , but more in their good will and loue to each other . For if the one did loue , the other did burne . His name was Dorido , hers Clorinia . Her Parents bred her vp so retiredly , Dorido and Clorinia , a 〈◊〉 of faithfull Louers . that they did not suffer her to treate or conuerse with any , from whence any danger might arise vnto her ; neither did she so much as shew her selfe at the Window , and did seldome looke out , vnlesse it were by chance . For such was the excesse of her beauty , that it was able to be a loadstone , to draw all the youthfull Nobilitie of Rome to desire her loue . Her Parents , and one only brother that she had , were very iealous of her honour ; insomuch that these two Louers could not inioy each other as they would .

True it is , that Clorinia , as one that was truly in loue , could by no meanes be hindred from shewing her selfe to Dorido , as oft as he past that way . For neere adioyning to her owne Window , there was another of a friend of hers ; who ( for that she was marryed ) might with more liberty stand there , when she was disposed so to do . And for that she had acquainted her with her loue , as often as Dorido past that way , she would giue her some signe or token , thorow a little hole that they had made of purpose in a partition Wall that was betweene them , whereupon she would presently make haste to the Window to see him ; And so receiued from her Louer that short , yet full content , which the couetousnesse and strictnesse of those times could afford .

This continued thus a good while : for other comfort had they none , then what they tooke in this fugitiue pleasure , seeing each other only in transitu , as he past along the street ; which ( like a shadow ) was as soone gone , as seene . But Dorido , impatient of this poore content , and desirous to improue these fauours he receiued from her , sought meanes , how he might with more conueniencie inioy so sweet a sight , seeing he might not be permitted to proceed any further . Whereupon he began to enter into a strict league of amitie with her brother , whose name was Ualerio ; into whose friendship he had wrought Valerio , brother to Clorinia . himselfe , with that fastnesse and feruour , that Ualerio could not liue without Dorido . Which was an occasion that moued him many times to carry him home with him to his house , wishing him to be Master thereof , and to make as bold therewith ( if he wanted any thing ) as if it were his owne , and to command it with the same freenesse . So that by this meanes , he had both liberty and leisure to contemplate the diuine beautie of his dearest Loue .

With these baytes , their loues were led along , gaining still more ground , and gathering more strength vnto them , manifesting more and more their loues , by their lookes . But Clorinia being the weaker of the two , and peraduenture more inflamed , opened her minde to a maide of hers called Scintila ; who desirous to doe her Mistresse seruice , went to seeke out Dorido ; whom when she had met with , she said thus vnto him . Scintila , Seruant to Clorinia .

Dorido , it is bootlesse to dissemble the businesse any longer , it is now no time to hide thy selfe from me , for it is not vnknowne vnto me what good liking there is betwixt you and my Mistresse , and what good loue yee make each to other ; And that you may see , that I doe not goe about to deceiue you , my Mistresse her selfe hath reuealed so much vnto me , intreating me , that I would be a meanes to lay open her heart vnto you , and to signifie vnto you , how much she loues you ; and for farther declaration thereof , hath by mee sent you this greene silke Riband , as a hopefull token , desiring you for her sake , that you will honour her so much , as to weare it about your arme . I assure my selfe you are perswaded , that it comes recommended vnto you from her owne hand , for that your selfe haue seene it many a time hang in the dressing of her hayre . So that from hence-forward , you may rest confident of my faithfulnesse towards you , so great is the desire that I haue to doe you seruice .

When Dorido heard this , it strooke amazement into him , neither did he seeme to like well of it , for that he had neuer any great good conceipt of this Wench , as being iealous of her discretion not holding her to be a fit instrument for a businesse of that great trust and consequence as this was ; fearing lest their loues might , through her weaknesse , come to be discouered ; But seeing there was no other remedie , and that it was Clorinias owne Act , and none of his , he dissembled his dislike , and in the best manner that he could , made shew vnto her , in how much he did esteeme this her loue and seruice ; and how ready he would be vpon all occasions , to deserue this her free and voluntary offer .

Some few dayes being past , and Dorido's desire increasing to speake face to face with his Mistresse , and finding no meanes how to doe it , Loue , that can ouercome all difficulties , and make those things facill that seeme almost impossible , opened a way thereunto : shewing the meanes vnto him , whereby he might come to compasse his desire . There was fastened to the Wall of that house where Clorinia dwelt ( which butted on the open street ) a piece of an old Wall , whereof the one halfe was falne downe , and runne into decay , being scarce so high , as to reach vp to the Window belonging to the house , and a little beneath that , was a hole stopt vp with a moueable stone that might be taken out , and put in againe at pleasure . This did serue Clorinia sometimes in stead of a Lattice , viewing thorow it , ( without being seene ) those that did passe to and fro in the street .

This was well knowne to Dorido , for that he had often seene his Mistresse peeping out at that hole . This opportunitie seemed to be fauourable to his desire ; whereupon he brake with Scintila , and intreated her , that she would stand his friend ; telling her : Since ( Scintila ) my good fortune hath beene such , that I haue found you well affected to our Loues , and willing to pleasure me all that you can , and to afford me your best furtherance therein ; I will not refuse to put my selfe into your hands , assuring my selfe , that you wil alwayes and in all things haue that care , which the loue you beare to your Mistresse , and the desire you haue to doe me any courtesie , doth oblige you vnto . You know , that since the time that I surrendred vp my soule to Clorinia , and put her into the possession of my heart , making her the true Lord and Owner both of it , and of my life , I haue got no other thing thereby , saue a correspondencie of affection expressed only by lookes , hauing as yet no other interpreters of our mindes , but the eyes , and all for lacke of better commoditie , and more fit and conuenient meanes . Which the more I am debarr'd Priuatio generat appetitum . of , the more it augmenteth my desire . For euermore priuation ingendreth appetite .

Now , there is a thing come into my head , how by your good helpe , my desire may rest honestly satisfied . You cannot but know the hole , that is vnderneath the Window ; this must be the place , and thou the instrument of my good fortune . Thou shalt speake vnto Clorinia , ( intreating her as from me ) that she will be pleased to correspond with me in this my iust request ; and in case she should refuse , as not daring out of feare to venture so farre , thou mayst then labour to perswade with her , and so guide and rule her will , to be brought to yeeld to this so easie a condition ; and that this night , seeing that the darknesse thereof is so much our friend , when all the people of the house shall be a bed and asleepe , she will be pleased but to speake with me at that hole . As for any other thing , I neither intreat it , nor pretend it .

This suite seemed to Scintila , very easie , and without any danger in the world ; she puts him in good hope , promises him to sollicite it , till shee had effected it ; she comply'de with her obligation , and pointed him the houre when he should come ; giuing him a certaine signe , what he should doe , when he came to the Window .

Dorido , when night was come , disguising himselfe , went to the place appointed , where he stood waiting for a good occasion .

When all those of the house were sure and safe enough , as sleepe could make them , Scintila went to the Window and opened it , taking occasion to throw out a little water . Which being seene by Dorido , who had got vpon the Wall , standing there to wayte a good houre , and knowing that it was Scintila , he said softly vnto her , Here I am . Shee willed him to stay awhile , and shutting the Window , in she goes .

Doridos heart in the meane while fell a leaping in his bosome , beating and thumping thereat as if it had sought to get out , being ready to burst with desire , inflamed with the fire of loue , fearefull of the various successe of things , lest some crosse accident might interpose it selfe betwixt him , and this his glory , whereunto he was now so neere , studying with himselfe what words he were best to vse vnto her , and in what kinde of phrase he should begin his Court-ship . His thoughts ranne through a thousand seuerall things , and his eyes were neuer off from that hole , looking as fa●…e there-into , as that ill-placed stone would permit him .

He might one while heare Clorinia talking with Scintila ; another while with her father and mother ; now perceiue how shee rose from the place where she sate , and by and by againe past to and fro , one while to this , another to that side of the house , till that ( her Parents being abed ) I saw her approching to the place appointed , whither she came so troubled , ( such a conflict was there betwixt Loue , and Shame ; Modestie , and Affection ) that she was about to goe backe . But inforced there-vnto by Scintila , at last she came .

Now , when they were come to this inter-view , and saw themselues thus happily met together , Dorido was so transported therewith , that although he had premeditated before-hand what he would say vnto her , he was strucken quite dumbe , and had not a word to say . And she no lesse trembling , not hauing any by in that coniuncture , which might giue breath either to the one or the other , to bring them to pronounce but so much as one word either good , or bad ; at last by little and little , when their frozen tongues had recouered a little warmth , they made a shift to exchange some few words on both sides , where-with they saluted each other .

Dorido intreated her hand and she willingly gaue it him ; he tooke it , and kist it againe and againe blessing and stroking his face therewith neuer suffering it to depart from his mouth . After he had thus taken his pleasure of her faire hand , he stretcht forth his to her , pleasing his touch with the delicate softnesse of her beautifull countenance , vnable to enioy any other pleasure , nor could that place and time affoord him any farther content .

In this sweet exchange of mutuall loue they intertained themselues a great while . And whilest their hands did speake , themselues were silent . For the talke of the one , did hinder the speech of the other . And because Scintila made haste to part them , for feare of being discouered , if they should dwell any longer vpon these complementall kindnesses , Dorido with many indearings of his loue , tooke leaue of his Clorinia , intreating her , that the next night following , at the same houre , and the same place , he might enioy the same Regalo , and sweet comfort againe . She promist him he should . And so for that time , they tool eleaue of each other , both of them remaining wonderfull well contented . But much more he , who was ready to leape out of his skinne for ioy . And wishing that night and the next day would post away apace , hee went home to his lodging .

Where offering to sit downe , he could not rest himselfe there ; and seeking to case himselfe by rising vp , he sought some place where-against to leane ; and when there likewise he could not be at quiet , hee romed vp and downe the roome , walking to and fro on the vnsteddy legges of Dis-rest , and Desire ; so that nothing could giue him case and content .

Thus did he suffer , and thus weare out that wearisome time , till the night following , and the time appointed , whose minutes he measured out by those glasses which distinguish the houres , giuing himselfe ouer to this idle curiositie .

The houre being come , he went to the place appointed , expecting when the signe should be giuen ; he had placed himself ▪ in the hollow nooke of an old gate , which ioyned to the wall neere vnto the window ; and being about to get vp to the hole , hee saw two Gallants passe by , which were in loue with a couple of Gentlewomen in the same streete who walked there vp & down , giuing many a turne to and fro , waiting when the street should be cleere , that they might make benefit of the like occasion . They were Doridos very good friends , and were not ignorant that he was inamoured of Clorinia . They were well acquainted the one with the other . But because Dorido was some-what more reserued in the loue that he made to Clorinia , he would not discouer himselfe vnto them , for feare of giuing suspition of that , which he was not yet Master of . And therefore whilest they continued walking there , he durst not mount the wall , lest haply they might chance to see him . For albeit that the night was very darke , yet the bulke of his body might , like a confused lampe or masse , be discerned by those that walkt vp and downe in that still and prying fashion , though by those that walkt along the streets at large , and minding no such matters , it was not so easie to be perceiued . And therefore , because they should not know him , getting him thence , he remoued himselfe a little farther off , looking still when they would be gone , or else intertaine themselues in their owne standings , that he might betake himselfe to his .

But when he saw that they stayd there still , and that his houre was now come , he thought with himselfe , that if his Mistris should come , and not finde him there , not knowing the cause thereof , she might taxe him of too much carelesnesse ; or accuse him of his lacke of loue .

This draue him , ( holpen on by choller ) into that desperation , that he was fully resolued to set vpon them , meaning to chase them away , if they did not make head against him ; and if they did stand to it , and seeke to defend themselues , then to kill them if he could . Which he might well haue done , as well in regard of the greatnesse of his strength and courage , as also for that he was euery way well prouided for them . Besides , that his anger , which had now set him all on a raging fire , ( being the whetstone , that sets an edge on Fortitude ) would haue added greater force to his Valour , especially when he should set vpon them ( which is no small aduantage ) vnawares .

But considering , not so much the perill of his owne person , as the present estate of his businesses that he had now in hand , that they might not be ouer-throwne by being ill managed , and by rash and inconsiderate courses , he pawsed on the matter , and grew a little cooler , biting his lips , wringing his hands , casting his eyes vp to heauen , and beating the ground with his feet like a mad-man .

And when he perceiued , that the time was past , he was now as sad and melancholly , as the night before , he was merry and iocond .

The very next day after , these two Gentlemen went to looke out Dorido , whom they had no sooner met withall , but they told him ; You know , Sir , that we two are your friends , and that we truely loue you ; and being such , ( as we vnfeignedly professe our selues to be ) it is neither fit , nor iust , that wee should conceale any thing from each other , but be free and open-hearted to one another : And it is likewise meet , ( if you be the same to vs , as wee be to you ) that you doe the like on your part , telling vs the truth of that which we shall aske you , if it be no way vnlawfull , or preiudiciall vnto you so to do .

Yesterday , some foure houres after night was in , we two , walking through our street ( for so we may tearme it ) in regard that both our hearts haue there their abode : seeking , I say , our aduenture at that time of night , we might perceiue a third man , which dogged vs all the way , following vs almost close at the heeles , scarce losing sight of vs all the while , so long as a man might say his Pater-noster .

We had a great desire to know who this should be , but we let him alone , because we would not cause any scandall . Wee could not so much as suspect , much lesse conceiue , who this should be , till we were afterwards certified ( by that which succeeded ) that you were the man . And the assurance that wee had thereof , was ; that we hauing staid awhile about your Mistresses window , we might heare it open , and perceiue Scintila put forth her head , who seeing our outward Bulkes , and not knowing who we were , spake in a low voice , and said :

Dorido , why do not you come vp ? When we heard her say so out of an impertinent curiositie ( relying on your friendship ) I answered ; Which way ? This word was no sooner vttered , but without replying farther vnto me , she clapt to the window , and away she went . From whence we imagine you had made some set match , and because we would not hinder you of your purpose , we presently departed thence , and went to looke after you , but could not finde you . So that wee could not till now acquaint you with what had past .

But because we desire to serue you , and that ( by conseruing this good loue and friendship betweene vs ) our particular pretensions may the better proceed , without any hinderance or impediment each to other , let vs diuide the night betweene vs .

We will take our time from mid-night , till it be day , leauing the former part of the night free to you ; and if you will exchange turnes with vs , liking , perhaps , better of ours , then your owne , be it as you please , and take which of the two you haue most minde to , for to vs it is indifferent , being all one in the reckning .

Dorido would faine haue dissembled the businesse with them ; but finding himselfe by these pregnant proofes , and forcible reasons , too fast ty'de to get loose from them , he could not so shift them of . And therefore accepting their friendly offer , he made choise of the former part of the night , according to their owne agreement .

And with this plaine proceeding , he prosecuted his Visit the third night , though without hope of obtaining it , doubting shee would not doe him that fauour , in regard of that vnlucky accident that fell out the night before .

But for that Clorinia lou'd , ( and that she truely lou'd ) nothing could detaine her from him , but with a great deale of care , was still inquiring , whether her Gallant meant to come againe , to glad her heart with his cheerefull and comfortable lookes , being very inquisitiue to know what should bee the reason , that caused him so to faile the last night of his promise .

Now , whilst her Father and Mother were at supper , rising from the table , she went to the fore-said hole , which she might safely doe , for that the chimney , neere where-vnto they supt , stood on the one side of the Hall , ( being a very large one ) and the window where the hole was , on the other side , neere adioyning to the corner ; in the midst whereof , were certaine things placed betweene , which did shadow and hinder the sight from the one side to the other . Her father and her mother sate so , that she might easily goe thither , and speake softly , without being heard of any .

The truth is , shee watcht an occasion ( hauing well aduised with her selfe what might happen ) to make quicke dispatch , and to rise from table as soone as possibly she could . Who came thither so opportunely , & in so good a time , that Dorido was there ready expecting her comming ; for from out the street , he might heare the footing of certaine steps in the Hall , which was a sure signe vnto him , that those paces were troden by his Mistresse , so that he made all the haste he could to get vp to see her . And because this was the second time of their meeting , they were a little better flesh't , then they were before , & met not with those stoppages , which heretofore had hindred their speech . So that they now discoursed more boldly , and more freely , as farre forth as the time would giue them leaue , ( which that night was but short , and in a manner stolne ) and afterwards they tooke their leaues with a great deale of tendernesse on either part , hauing agreed betweene themselues , that as long as the Moone was in her wane , they would inioy the fulnesse of their loues , which increased now apace , till some better meanes should be found for their freer accesse .

In this interim , a yong Gentleman , a very great friend of Doridos , called Horatio , fell in loue with Clorinia : He courted her , he seru'd her , and obseru'd her , as became a Louer , notwithstanding , that he knew , that shee was his friends Mistresse . But he knew withall , that hee did not treat with intent to take her to wife , but himselfe did .

Relying therefore vpon this their great friendship , the iustnesse of his request , and the honesty of his cause , he intreated him of all loues , that he would desist from making loue to Clorinia , and giue way to him , seeing their endes were so different .

Horatio's affectionate words , and lawfull request , were of that power , and preuailed so much with Dorido , that he told him , that for his part he was well contented therewith , promising him , that if his Mistresse should so like of it , and that she could finde in her heart to fancy and affect him , hee would giue ouer his suite , leauing the field open vnto him to take his pleasure , without any contradiction in the world ; and that he should rest himselfe assured , that he would no way stand in competition with him . For the better effecting whereof , he would doe two things : The one , to dis-deceiue Clorinia , by deliuering plainely vnto her , that by reason of a certaine Vow , that hee had made to himselfe , it was not in his power to be married vnto her , which he would not breake for all the world . The other ; the better to make her forget him , he would goe about to make loue else-where . Yet , for that great friendship , that was betwixt himselfe , and Valerio , he must hold him excused , if he did not forbeare now and then to visit her , which might turne much to his good , but no hurt at all ; being that his true intent and purpose was , to fauour his pretension , vpon all occasions that should offer themselues vnto him .

Herewith Horatio rested content , and was wonderfull well satisfied , and gaue Dorido many thankes ; not considering , that hauing left it to Clorinias choyse , and putting himselfe vpon her Election , till that he knew her minde , and had gained her good will , he had negotiated little , or nothing at all . And the offer made by Dorido , was vpon the confidence that he had , that to speake thereof vnto Clorinia , was no other , then the tearing of her heart from forth her brest . But Horatio carried away with vaine confidencies , and various hopes , intreated Dorido , that he would speake a good word for him . He promised he would , that he might still maintaine his friendship with Horatio , and not giue any note or scandall to their loue .

To comply therefore with his promise , and to make good his owne offer , when he met with his Mistresse , he made a long discourse vnto her of all that had passed betweene them ; Telling her , that if she could finde in her heart to loue Horatio , and be brought to settle her affection vpon him , God forbid that euer he should goe about to hinder so honourable an intent . But in case she could not , yet at least was she bound in thankfulnesse to accept of this his good will , by not shewing her selfe coy and strange vnto him ; and if he past by the street where she was , shee should not scornfully shut the Window against him , and flie from his sight , and should shew him a cheerefull looke , though it were but feigned .

To this Clorinia answered betwixt anger and scorne , telling him ; that hee should surcease , to lay any such command vpon her , and that he should speake no more thereof vnto her ; for if for this cause , he should leaue and forsake her , she would rather be content to be hated and abhorred by him , then to wrong either him , or her selfe , by placing her loue else-where : Who as hee had beene the first , so he should be the last as long as she liu'd ; which life of hers , she would presently sacrifice vnto him , for to take away all occasion from him of commanding her to loue another , or to forget him ; as for the rest , he might doe as he saw cause , she would not hinder him , let him take what course it pleased him , so as it liked him , she would not stand against it .

Dorido tooke wonderfull contentment in hearing this answer come from her ; for these words of her , were that true Chrisole wherein the Gold of their loues was refined , and that touchstone that tryde the purenesse of their affections , and gaue assurance that it was not counterfeit metall . So he treated of this matter no more , but followed his wonted Visits both day and night , hauing first giuen an account to Horatio of what he had done . Hee would not beleeue it , yet waxed wondrous sad , when he heard it . But for all this , he did not leaue off to serue her , but could neuer finde her indisposition to doe him the least grace or fauour , but rather to vse him with all sharpnesse and rigour .

Whence it came to passe , that seeing himselfe disdained , and Dorido preferred before him ; furie prouoketh his patience , setting his heart on fire with an infernall rage ; insomuch that his loue was now turned into hatred . And whereas before he was alwayes desirous to doe her seruice , from that time forward he laid waite to doe her a mischiefe , beating his braines , and bending all his wits and studie to worke her ouerthrow ; or at least to put some foule disgrace vpon her . So that this Horatio , hauing dogg'd Dorido diuers times , till he had learned the houre , the place , and the meanes how he got vp vpon the Wall , and the manner of his carriage and fashion when he came to speake with her , and she with him .

One night amongst the rest , he did anticipate and preuent the comming of the true Louer , and feigning himselfe to be Dorido , he clambred vp to the place , and made a little noyse , by iogging the stone that was in the hole of the Wall , as he had obserued him to haue done the like diuers times heretofore . Now Clorinia taking notice of the signe , but not considering the great anticipation , and preuention of the time , came presently at this call , and taking out the stone , with many sweet and kinde words , she receiued this feigned Louer , who remained silent all this while , which louing language of hers , did but the more incourage Horatio in his intended treason ; and putting his hand into the hole , tooke hold on Clorinias faire hand , and tooke it forth , feigning that he much desired to kisse the same . And holding her fast thereby with his left hand , and with his right , plucking out a sharpe Knife , which for that purpose h●… bare about him , with little difficulty , but a great deale of impiety , he cut it off , and carryed it away with him , leauing this poore afflicted Damsell lying in a swoune vpon the floore , by striuing to suppresse her sorrow , which she ought to haue vented with her voyce , and with her cryes and lamentations ; but she did smother them , offring force as it were to this her womanly weaknesse ; and did shut them vp close in her heart , and so offending the vitall spirits , she remained in a manner dead . And there questionlesse would she haue breathed her last , if she had not had present helpe ; for her Father and her Mother missing her , and not seeing her in the roome where they were , they called vnto her , and because she returned no answer , they maruailing much thereat , went forth to seeke her : they found her weltering in her owne bloud vpon the ground , hard by that hole , which was left open in the Wall , and trickled downe with the bloud that came from her , which streames of bloud were as so many proofes and euidences of the cause of her death ; for so they deem'd her to be , because they could not finde in her any signe of life .

Her sorrowfull Parents , seeing this cruell and dolefull spectacle , and the trunke of her arme without a hand , being vnable to bridle their griefe , fell downe in a swoune close by their vnfortunate Daughter , no lesse breathlesse then she was . But comming presently to themselues againe , they began with the greatest lamentations that were euer heard , to bewaile this so great a misfortune that had befalne them , being able to moue any other eye to pitie , and to powre forth teares in aboundance , to see so young and handsome a Gentlewoman so butcherly and so inhumanely abused . But in the midd'st of this their excessiue sorrow , they began to consider with themselues , that if the life of their Daughter should be lost , with it they should likewise lose their honour , which in their discretion , they held not fit to hazard together with her . They resolued therefore with themselues to keepe this deed secret , and so leauing off their lamenting , drying their eyes , and smothering their sighs , they likewise quieted those of the house , and bearing Clorinia from thence , after many remedies , which they applyed to her , they had some-what brought her to her selfe : Who , when she saw her selfe in the midst of her mournefull Parents , and in that pitifull manner , her sorrow redoubled vpon her , which receiuing increase from her shame , shee swouned anew . Wherewith her Parents griefe was a-fresh renewed in that terrible manner , as if their hearts had beene rent from their bodies by the roots . And with the tendrest and kindest words they could vse , they did seeke all they could to comfort her ; speaking vnto her in the sweet and louing language of such a Father and Mother , that so dearely lou'd a Daughter , indeuouring by those soft and gentle phrases , to cure the wound of her minde , which was more then that of her body . With this , poore wretched Clorinia began to gather breath , and bewailing her misfortune ( which till then she was not able to doe ) she did moue the very stones to compassion , and to take pitie of this her wofull and miserable condition .

Then they presently began with great secresie to treate of her Cure . Valerio her brother went forth-with to fetch a Surgeon , a friend of his , of whose secresie he was confidently assured . The night was exceeding darke , and therefore he tooke a Lanthorne along with him ; and as he was crossing the street , it was his hap to discry Dorido a farre off , who in a carelesse kinde of fashion was comming along the street , with purpose to goe see his Mistresse , being ignorant of what had passed . He began to call vnto him with a sad and mournfull voyce , and when he drew neere vnto him , with a heauy cheere hee sayd ; O my true friend ! Whither art thou going ? Goest thou peraduenture to condole with vs our great disaster , and that Tragick sorrow , which must shorten our life ? Hast thou either seene , or heard of the like mis-hap vnto ours , and of the vnfortunate accident that hath befalne our dearest sister Clorinia ? Woe is me ; yet to thee , that art our true friend , I cannot conceale that , which we must hide from all the world besides . For I know assuredly , that thou wilt beare a part in our sorrow , and be a Companion of these our miseries ; nay I know thou wilt , as one of vs , vse all diligence in reuenging this wrong , and labour all thou canst to finde out him , that hath beene the cruell murtherer of my sister . Wilt thou Dorido ? I am sure thou wilt .

Dorido , whilest he was hearing this sad storie , stood amazed like a man , that had beene bereft of his senses : And it was a wonder , that he was able to stand vpon his legs , being so word-strooken to the heart as he was , but recollecting himselfe by degrees , which was holpen on by the desire which he had to vnderstand how the world went , striuing to fortifie himselfe against this fierce assault , which had already shaken the very Walls of his hearr , with a troubled voyce he began to inquire what the matter was .

Ualerio , from point to point deliuered vnto him all the particulars , and told him that he was now going to call a Surgeon ; intreating him , that he would goe along with him , fearing lest the life of Clorinia , through too much delay , might runne some hazard . Dorido accompanyed him ; and albeit hee had more need of comfort himselfe , then to giue comfort vnto others , yet notwithstanding , framing himselfe thereunto as well as he could , at length he brake thus with him ; Friend Ualerio , this dolefull misfortune of yours , and the lamentable case of your vnfortunate sister Clorinia , doth so neerely touch me , and workes that true sense of sorrow in me , that no lesse then to your selfe , they may giue me the Pésame : and come and condole with me this disastrous mischance , for I am so truly sensible thereof , that I dare a●…ow , you haue no aduantage of me , nor can your sorrow exceed mine .

But seeing our griefe can doe vs but little good , and that it is to no end to weepe , and take on for that , which cannot now be holpen ; My aduice is , that you would consult what is to be done in this case ; and if I may perswade , I would haue all diligence vsed for the finding out of that Traytor which hath done this villanous Act , to the end that vengeance and full reuenge may be taken of him , which was neuer yet executed vpon any other . This taske you shall put vpon me , I will take this charge to my selfe , and doubt not , but by one meanes or other I shall come to finde it out . Goe you , and call the Surgeon : For it is not fit , where so many things are to be done , we should be all busied about one and the same thing , especially , that which belongs to my charge , being a businesse , which will require much labour . Let euery man take his Qu , and perfect his owne part . Follow you yours , and I will follow mine ; and so farewell ; for I haue not the patience to deferre it any longer . And so they parted .

Now Dorido had a strong beliefe , and did confidently assure himselfe , that Horatio , and none but Horatio , could be the author of so great wickednesse and falsehood , induced there-vnto by those many reasons , which did concurre to confirme this perswasion , the least whereof was a manifest token , and apparant euidence , that it was onely his Act , and none but his . Wherevpon he resolued with himselfe , to inflict such a punishment vpon him , as should be equall to that his iust disdaine , and answerable to the heinousnesse of his offence .

With this determination he went home to his owne house ; and being entred into his lodging , shutting the doore to him , he let loose the reines to his teares , grieuously lamenting this sad mischance that had thus vnhappily befalne his Mistris .

O Clorinia ( said he ) the delight of my eyes , and the ioy of my heart , I see what harme thou hast suffered for my sake ; I ( vnfortunate I ) was the cause thereof . It was that Traytor Horatio , that thus deceiu'd thee , whom thou supposedst to haue been beloued Dorido .

O vnhappy Mistris of my life , I haue brought thee to this miserable passe , it is I that haue kill'd thee , and no body else ; for it was I that did disturbe thee of thy rest ; it was I , that drew thee out from thy retyred and reserued course of life . O accursed chinke ! O accursed eyes , that euer yee peep 't thereinto ! O accursed tongue , that madest the motion , that we should there meet , and talke together . O my deare Clorinia , Clorinia , my life ; yet not my life , but my death : since that mine must follow thine : I was the cause of all this ill . Yet will I spare my selfe so much life , as to liue to reuenge this notorious wrong ; and liue thou too , Clorinia , till thou see the vengeance that shal be done vpon this Traytor , which shall be as exemplary , as iust : that it may remaine as a memoriall to all succeeding Ages .

And I heere solemnely vow to sacrifice to thy sacred and innocent ashes , the impious bloud of this vile Traytor Horatio . For that one hand , which he hath taken from thee , I will giue thee two of his . Hee cut off one , that was innocent and harmelesse , and I will cut off two , that were wicked and sacrilegious . Let Heauen lengthen thy life so long , till I effect this my purpose , and suffer thee to enioy that recompence , which I doe owe vnto thy loue .

And thou ( sweet Clorinia ) pardon so much of the fault , as was in me . And if my death will doe you any pleasure , or that it stand with your liking , mine owne hands ere this , should haue made way there-vnto , and laid it downe at your feet .

With these and other pittifull complaints , did he bewaile this heauy accident , worthy of eternall teares ; and surely sorrow would there and then haue made an end of him , so extremely had it seazed vpon him , and with that violence of passion , if his afflicted soule had not beene vnder-propt with the desire of reuenge ; and thus betweene death and life did hee spend that night .

The next day following he went to visit Clorinia ; whither when he was come , her Parents , and her Brother began afresh to renew their teares , imbracing and weeping one ouer another , till at last the father of Clorinia began , as well as his griefe would giue him leaue , to say ; O sonne Dorido , what misfortune can be so great , so miserable as ours ? What rigour of the heau'ns hath conspired against vs ? What infernall fury euer inuented the like mischiefe ? What thinkest thou of this sad chance ? What deem'st thou of our honour ? What cloake will couer so foule a spot ? And what reuenge may mitigate so great a wrong as this ? and giue satisfaction answerable to these our sorrows ? Tell vs ( I pray ) what comfort can we looke for ? Or how can we liue without her , who hath giuen vs life ? Dorido , not being able to abstaine from teares , comforting her afflicted Parents , and Brother , told them : Wee are not now to spend the time in teares and lamentations , but in that which may import vs most .

And albeit , that which I am willing to propose , ought rather to proceed from any body else , then my selfe , yet the occasion , and the secresie wherewith it is fit it should be carried , obligeth me there-vnto :

You all know very well , and haue seene to your griefes , the generall misfortune that hath befalne vs all ; being as well yours , as mine ; and rather mine , then yours , for that your sorrow is ioyned vnto mine ; which addition makes but the heape of mine owne the bigger . Besides , I see the thred of my life cut off before my face , that now I expect a death as bitter , as I thought it would haue beene pleasant vnto me , if it had made an end of me , before Clorinia . Ye are not ignorant what I am ; and I likewise know your great worth and quality ; which if it shall not ouer-sway mine , it is the singular loue and friendship ye haue borne me , that must equall the scales , laying an euerlasting obligation vpon me to deserue the same . This case then I make to be mine owne ; I challenge it as a thing proper vnto me .

And that the world may so vnderstand it , and so take it , that which hereafter I shal intreat you for by a third person , I will now demand of you by way of grace and request : Which is ; That you will be pleased to giue me Clorinia to wife . Wherein ye shall doe these two things : First , ye shall thereby recouer your honour . Secondly , ye shall execute your reuenge by this hand of mine . If heauen shall be so propitious and fauourable vnto me to blesse me with her life , she shall liue and remaine with me , though not according as her worth deserueth , yet answerable to that desire which I haue to serue her ; making that vp in my loue , which is wanting in my meanes . And if ought succeed hereafter in the righting of this wrong , it is fit the world should take notice , that her husband did that where-vnto he was obliged ; and not Dorido , her parents friend . Make good therefore this my request , for the good which from thence may redound to vs all .

To the Parents , as also to the Brother , this did seeme to be a very iust and honest motion , and gaue him many thankes for this true testimony of his loue , both to them , and their house . But because there was one as yet vn-askt , which was to be a principall party in this busines , which was Clorinia , they would see if they could draw her to consent there-unto . Which when it was broken vnto her , the teares gushed out of her eyes for very ioy , and she said vnto them :

This is that alone , which I hope , will keepe life in me : and if I should buy it at as deare a rate , as death , yet I should thinke it cheape inough , and that I had a good penny-worth of my bargaine . I trust in God that I shall liue contentedly , and dye comfortably . And therefore , I beseech you , that I may bee espoused to Dorido , according as he hath desired . Presently here-vpon they call'd him in , and ( when they came to see each other ) for a good while , they were neither of them able to speake a word , both their hearts were so full , and their soules so ouerwhelmed ; hers with ioy , and his with griefe .

That fit ouer-past , they plighted their trothes , and were made man and wife , vsing those diligencies therein with the best secresie they could , till the time should come , that they might be openly espoused in the Church .

Three dayes were spent in this Solemnity , and with this content Clorinia seemed to be vpon the mending hand . But it was but a lightening before death : for through the store of bloud which she lost , she liu'd not long after . Dorido perceiuing , that it was impossible that his Spouse should escape with life , to the end that she might die fully contented and satisfied , ( if there may be any such thing in death : ) on the fourth day , holding it now a fit and conuenient time , to put that in execution which he had deuised and plotted with himselfe , on the fifth he inuited Horatio to his house , as he had done at other times heretofore . Who trusting in the secresie wherewith he had committed this foule offence , and that there was no talke thereof in the Towne , nor so much as a word spoken of it , went thither as securely and as boldly , as if he had done no such matter , and without any suspition or iealousie at all .

Dorido , to lull him the more asleepe , and to make him more secure , feigned , not to know of any such thing , he entertain'd him with a cheerefull looke , laught , and was merry with him , that growing thereby the more confident , he might the willinger accept of his inuitation . Dorido had put such a kinde of Confection into one of his Bottles of Wine , that it should cast him that drunke thereof , into a most deepe and profound sleepe . Which he secretly commanded he should be serued withall at the table , as oft as he call'd for any Wine . And as he had commanded , so was it ordred . And when he had euen now dined , the last morsell being scarce out of his mouth , he sate me in his Chayre like one that had beene dead .

Dorido , when he saw he was sure enough now in his hands , and that the Fowle could not escape the snare , binding his legges and armes as hard as he could for his life , to the legges and armes of the Chayre , and hauing made fast all the doores of his house , he put to his nose a kinde of little round ball ( like a Pomander ) made for that purpose , which he had no sooner smelt vnto , and taken the sent thereof vp into his head , but that he presently awaked from that deepe sleepe , wherein hee had before beene buryed . And finding himselfe bound in that fast manner , without being able to wag , he knew then that his punishment was at hand , for that hand which he had so cruelly cut off . Dorido was as quicke in cutting off both his hands , as he was nimble in vn-ioynting that of hers . That done , throwing a cord about his necke , making vse of one of the corners of the Chayre , he gaue him the Garrote , wherewith he was strangled to death . The next morning , before it was peepe of day , he droue him along before him in the Chayre vpon a Horse , till he came to the house , where Clorinia dwelt , and putting a piece of Timber Gibbetwise , into that hole in the Wall , where he had committed this odious and vn-manly act , he left him there hanging with his hands ty'd about his necke in a string , ( like a childes payre of Mi●…ens . ) and some Verses hanging at his Hempen chayne , to giue satisfaction to the world , vpon what reason this was done . And so Dorido , when he had thus reuenged himselfe vpon Horatio , left Rome , with purpose neuer to see it againe ; thinking with himselfe , that without his Clorinia , neither Countrie , nor life , nor any thing else could be comfortable vnto him . And about the breake of day , when this spectacle began to be seene , and talkt of , Clorinia within a little after finished her life .

This lamentable Accident caused great both sorrow and admiration in the Embassadour . But his houre was come , that he must to the Palace , which made them breake off for that present , and to take their leaues . I thanke God a thousand times , that he made me not a Louer : And if I had not beene a Gamester , peraduenture I should haue done worse , as you shall see in the second part of my life , whereunto ( if my first haue pleas'd thee ) I inuite thee .

The Verses , which were hung about Horatios necke , turned into our vulgar tongue , sound thus :

I was rash Hee ; blinded with iealous loue , Seeing my friend , preferr'd in my Loues choyse , ( Counterfeiting his Signall , cloathes and voyce ) Whom deepe Disdaine did to foule Hatred moue , To Heau'n and Men , I cruell Traytor grew ; Faire Clorinia ( with innocence bedeckt ) I wrong'd , ( vrg'd by my Loue , and her Neglect . ) Whose Storie , may all eyes with teares bedew . Her Hand and Life ( that I on her might wrecke Reuenge ) I did cut off : Cause of her end , Her Hate to mee , and Loue vnto my friend , Hee hung these hands of mine about my necke . Was Party , Witnesse , and Iudge : Whose sentence Was too small a punishment for my Offence . FINIS .

THE ROGVE : OR THE SECOND PART OF THE LIFE OF GUZMAN DE ALFARACHE .

WRITTEN IN SPANISH by MATHEO ALEMAN , Seruant to his Catholike Maiestie , and borne in SEUILL .

LONDON , Printed by G. E. for EDWARD BLOVNT . 1623.

TO THE CVRIOVS READER .

ALbeit I was still afraid to expose this my Second Part to the light , after it had beene some yeares finished and perused , ( though more had beene too few , for the presuming to publish it ) and that it were better for me to vphold the good opinion gotten by my first , ( which with open armes was generally so kindly embraced by all ) then to hazard their good wils by this second ; I was in doubt with my selfe , whether I were best to put my reputation vpon so ticklish a pi●… either because it should not perhaps be so well accepted ; or that I might chance to fall short of my desire , missing the marke whereat I aymed : For commonly where the greatest care is taken , those that are vnfortunate , are wont to faile most . Yet notwithstanding , it being with me , as with that bad seruant , who with blowes and kicks , is awaked out of his deepe sleepe ; being rouzed vp by so violent a stroake ; that hapned to my selfe , which is wont to befall lazie and slothfull persons ; to doe one thing twice ouer . For hauing beene too prodigall in communicating my papers , and the conceptions of my braine , they caught me when I was vpon my wings . So that seeing my selfe ( if I may lawfully vse that phrase ) robbed , and defrauded , I was enforced to fall a-fresh to my labour , seeking out some new supply of moneys , wherewithall to pay my debts , and to dis-ingage my word , which I had formerly past . So that by this meanes I was driuen to differ , as much as possibly I could , from that which I had written before . Surely it was Esaus owne ouer-sight , some peculiar slip or fault of his , that being tyred out in the chase , and killing of his game , gaue occasion to Iacob to steale away his blessing from him .

Truly , I must ingeniously acknowledge in this my Competitor , Concurrent , or Corriuall ( who ere he be ) his great learning , his nimble wit , his deepe iudgement , his pleasant conceits , and his generall knowledge in all humane and diuine letters , and that his discourses throughout , are of that qualitie and condition , that I doe much enuie them , and should be proud that they were mine . But by the way , let him giue me leaue to tell him ( which is no more then what others say ) that if vpon any other occasion sauing this , hee would haue beene pleased to make vse of these his good parts , so honourable would his paines haue therein appeared , that the grauest person that is , need not to haue beene ashamed to discouer both his name , and his face ; but to deale after this manner , was to foyst into Castile , the coyne of Aragon . But herein , that succeeded vnto him , which vsually ( we see ) befalleth many women , whose parts and members , considered seuerally by them-selues and apart , are of that rare and singular perfec●…n , that desire cannot wish it more , nor the pensill exp●…e it better . But afterwards , when all these distinct parts shall be conioyned , made one whole peece , and examined together , they fall short in the making vp of a faire and well-fauour'd face . But he proceeded therein discreetly ; taking that course , which they vse to doe , who goe ( presuming on the actiuenesse of their person ) with their Lance in their wrest , masked and disguised , to encounter their aduersarie . But because these are things of aduenture , and depend much vpon fortune , if they hit right , they make them selues knowne , but if they misse , they goe away ashamed , and you shall neuer see the face of them . Well , whatsoeuer hath beene done in this kinde , or howsoeuer carryed by him , he hath enforced me to defend my selfe . For that he argueth ; That the great paines that he had taken , and so worthy of excuse , in following the tracke of my steps , and the imitation of my workes , grew first from this , that hee esteemed them to be good . I pay him againe in the same money , by following of him . Onely we differ in this ; That he hath made a second part out of my first ; and I onely imitated his second . And shall doe the like in the third , if being elder hand , he shall vye vpon me . Whereunto if I be put , I shall not refuse to see it . Assuring my selfe , that I shall not be shut out , but haue a place amongst the rest . For the field being so large , through the pleasantnesse of the subiect , whereunto the sharpnesse of the appetite will likewise giue some helpe , more parts will daily come out of this booke , then Conies out of their Berryes , and more glosses made thereupon , then on the faire Angelica in the dayes of Castilejo . But I aduise in this case , that they would not be too nimble fingerd in taking pen in hand , till they haue wearyed their eyes with perusing , and inlarged their vnderstanding , that it may bee made capable to receiue whatsoeuer shall bee brought vnto it . Nor would I haue them to write , till they be well read , if they will attaine to hit the white , and not shoot beside the butt . For our Guzman hauing purposed to play the good Student in the Latine and Greeke tongues , and in the studie of Rhetoricke , and hauing gone forward in his studies with a full purpose to professe Religion ; to take him now out of Alcala , thus on the sodaine , so quite alienated from his former inclination , and so bad a Proficient , were cortar el hilo alatela , to cut the thread before the web were wouen ; contrary to that which is pretended in this Historie of his Life ; which was onely to serue as a sentinell , to discouer all sorts of Vices , & to draw treacle out of diuers poysons : That is to say ; To describe vnto you a man , perfect in his parts and person , punished with troubles , and afflicted with miseries , and falling afterwards into ( of all other ) the basest roguerie , is put into the Gallies , where his wings were clipt , that he could not get thence in haste . Let vs slip it ouer , That he could not be called a most famous theefe , for the stealing of three cloakes , howbeit two of them were very faire ones , and of much value , but the other a poore one : Let vs likewise omit , That it is improper to fabulous Histories , to introduce publike and knowne persons , naming them by their proper names : And let vs come to that obligation , which he had to returne to Genoa to reuenge the wrong wherewith he threatned his kindred in the last chapter of the first Part : And many other things , which without giuing satisfaction , hee passeth ouer in diuers different fashions , altering , & reiterating not only the accident it selfe , but euen the very words vsed therein . So that vndoubtedly I am of opinion , that it is a thing of more difficultie , then euery man is aware of , to vndertake the pursuit of another mans discourse . For it leadeth its vndertaker along euen from his purposed , and first intended course , to those things , whose chase he cannot choose but follow . Nay should he come to confer mouth to mouth , with the partie him-selfe , it is impossible but he should goe out of the way : For there are many conceits , that are thrust into by-corners , and there hid ; wherewith euen it s owne proper Author is much troubled , vpon a sudden and present occasion , with calling them to minde , time hauing worne them almost out ; whereby men may fall into mistakes ; quoting K. Don Fernando of Zamora , in stead of the Infanta Dona Vrraca , his daughter . This doth not argue want in the vnderstanding , nor is it a defect , that another should iump vpon my conceit , & think my thoughts . But I say it is rashnes in him , that will offer to run with that man , who must needs out-strip him , through the others slownesse of footmanship , or that he runnes not right vpon the marke . If here the phrase be not so significant , the stile not so loftie , the language not so sweet , the prouerbs not so pithie , the stories not so pleasant , nor so cleanly carryed as I could wish ; My excuse must be ; Many ouer-sights cannot be auoyded in the writing but of a little ; which will aske a larger time to correct and amend them . But hauing finished my third Part , and following Horace his counsell therein , that I may be the better able to offer it to your view ( which shall be shortly ) I could not excuse this passage , as being very necessarie for those ends which I pretend . Accept of my good will , which is to serue thee . For the times are not still alike ; nor the starres alwayes fauourable ; nor Calliope continually set vpon the merry pin .

ANCIANT LVYS DE VALDES HIS ELOGIVM To Mateo Aleman .

AS if Armes , and Learning were not Sisters , some pratling Sophister seemeth ( me thinkes ) to tell me , That I should doe well to follow my military profession , and let Elogiums alone , leauing them to Schollers ; it seeming vnto him , that these two , are of too different a nature , to consort together . But I shall be able to point forth vnto him , not one , but many Caesars , as dextrous in Letters , as disciplin'd in Armes . And that I may take away all occasion from such Cauillers , of alledging against me , That I am too forward in vsurping the office of an Orator , taxing mee of too much boldnesse and inconsiderate rashnesse , I will march as farre off as I can , from their dangerous style of flattery and ostentation , safely retiring my selfe into mine owne Trenches , and there to defend and maintaine the truth , a thing as proper to a Souldier , as is his Sword and Target , or his Pike and Corslet .

I will be but the Eccho , not the Chronicler , of what I haue seene , heard , treated , and knowne abroad in the world ; for I haue beene in my time in many , and different Nations , and Countries . I will goe on , and cumply with my desire , not fearing the face of Calumniation , because I know my selfe to be dis-interessed , and a free-man . For loue , interest , and feare , are those three ropes , that halter Iustice .

And for that it is so iust a thing , to reward mens labours , encouraging the vertuous with a shout , as they doe in warre , giuing it them as a thankfull pay , which being truly deserued , is a true treasure . I haue therefore beene willing , seeing so many so drouzy in the businesse , to take vp the pen for them , though least of all obliged thereunto in the common opinion of the world , by reason of my profession . But no man shall out-strip me herein . We are all beholding to Mateo Aleman , wee are all indebted vnto him , and of all he doth iustly deserue condigne commendation . For wee must acknowledge him to be the first , that till this very day , hath in such a kind of style as his , come to discouer and excommunicate Vice : ( with such a sweetnesse and softnesse ) which being to them a venemous Aspe , robs them of their liues , when they are in their sweetest sleepe .

Many Physitians minister to their sicke Patients , pils of Aloes for to purge the head , but few or none of them haue taken pleasure in chewing of them , nor so much as to touch them with their tongue , neyther haue they beene able so to sweeten them , that mouing a desire to eate them , they should procure a generall appetite . Only Mateo Aleman , hath taught vs the way to taste things with delight , instructing vs by other mens actions how to gouerne ours : with no small hurt to his health and estate , hauing much wasted both the one and the other by his painfull studies . And we may very well say of him , That neuer Souldier had a poorer purse , and a richer minde , nor a life more vnquiet , and full of trouble , then was his ; and only , because hee accounted it a greater honor vnto him , to be held a poore Philosopher then a rich flatterer . He left ( as it is well knowne to the world ) voluntarily , and of his owne accord , the Kings palace , where hee serued almost twenty yeares , being the best , and as it were the very creame of his age , in the Office of Contador de resultas , to King Philip the 2. and in many other waighty businesses , besides visitations and suruayes , which were committed vnto him , in all which hee behaued himselfe so well , that hee euermore gaue wonderfull good satisfaction , proceeding so vprightly , that he grew to be so poore , that not being able any longer , by reason of his wants and necessities , to continue these his seruices , he retyred himselfe from that course of life , to one of lesser both ostentation and attendance . And though he wanted the goods of fortune , yet was he rich in the endowments of the soule , which are of much more estimation and price , then worldly pelfe , whereof no man could more truly boast himselfe .

Let the tongues of men be listned vnto , and yee shall heare nothing so common as the publishing of his praise : no lesse in Spaine ( where it is no small wonder to haue a Prophet liked in his owne Countrey ) then in Italy , France , Flanders , and Germany , which mine owne eares and eyes can truly testifie and avow . And I might ( if need were ) boldly sweare , That I neuer heard his name mentioned , but with the addition of some honourable Epithite , euen to the giuing of him this noble Attribute , El Espan̄ol divino , The diuine Spaniard .

Who , like him , in lesse then three yeares , and in his owne life time , saw his owne workes translated into so many sundry languages , that like your Cartillas in Castile , his bookes ran posting for Italy and France ? What Author euer writ , who at the very time when he was willing to bring forth his Labours to the light , they haue scarce come forth of the wombe of the Presse , but that they were strangled in the mid-wifes hands , and left for dead . And those his workes , that came forth into the world aliue , and did breathe , and inioy their life , as these of this our Author , they flew abroad with such swift and nimble wings , holpen by those of Fame , that with extraordinary speed they past through all parts of Christendome , in somuch that there was not any one Prouince , whereinto they haue not flowen , and receiued , where-euer they came , most honorable entertainment ?

What workes can ye instance in , that in so short a time , haue had so many Impressions ? The whole number of those bookes that haue been printed amounting to more then fifty thousand volumes . There haue beene ( of my knowledge ) six and twenty seuerall Impressions , whereof he was rob'd , whereby others became rich and the Owner of them , poore . Against whom but him , did ye euer finde the gates of Murmuration shut ? Who , but he , had so perfectly learnd the way to beat Malice out of the field , and to put her to flight ? If this be so ; or if ( as by euidext Mathematicall demonstrations ) it shall require a necessary proofe of witnesses , let the best of the world be brought forth , I meane the famous Vniuersity of Salamanca , where being celebrated there , by the best wits of that Academy , I haue heard many speake of him , as the Grecians of their Demosthenes , and the Romanes of their Cicero ; reputing Mateo Aleman as the Prince of eloquence in the Spanish tongue , as well for the modesty , & dextrousnes of his style , as for his elegancies , and choice phrases . Of which opinion , was areligious Augustine , as discreet , as learned ; who maintained in that Vniuersity , in a publike Act , that there was not from the beginning of the world , to this present day , that the first Part of this was printed , any booke of like nature to this , ( being no diuine subiect ) of greater eyther profit or pleasure .

Valençiano testifieth this truth ; who ( denying his name ) falsly styles himselfe Mateo Lujan , that he might be taken for Mateo Aleman . And albeit he might parallel him in his name , and Country , yet that he should be the same man in his workes , it was not possible . Only therein his malice may be discouered , and that he did that he did , moued thereunto out of the benefit that he should reape therby : which if it had fallen out ( as he expected ) had been no small matter ; But it fell out , ( as fit it was ) contrary to his expectation . For in that very self-same yeare that it came forth , I bought one in Flanders , which in the Frontispice , had its Impression in Castile , taking it to be authenticall and good , till I had read a little of it , and then it was not long , that his eares a a Mostrar las orejas fuera del pellejo , is metaphorically an Asse . shot out of his skin , and so came to be knowne what he was .

But to let this passe , and to speake of those that admiring such a deale of depth and profoundnes both of wit and learning , being wonderfull willing to haue some learned and graue Fathers to adopt this childe of his begetting , they all laboured to seeke out some one , who for his quicknes of wit , greatnes of Schollership , and singularity of eloquence , might be able to vndertake so rare and admirable a peece of worke ; all which doth argue the worth thereof , and redound to the greater glory of the true Author . And then shall they free themselues of this doubt , when they shall haue perused his St. Antonio de Padua , which out of a vow that he had made , to set forth his life & miracles , made him so slow in publishing this his second Part. They shall see how miraculously he treateth of them , and it may almost be counted a miracle , if we will but consider how wonderfully he carryed himselfe in the printing of them . For putting his papers from hand to hand to the Presse , and wanting matter for that dayes worke , I knew for certaine , that ouer-night he composed so much stuffe , as did serue to keepe the Presse going all the next day following : for he was troubled at that time with diuers other businesses , which did necessarily require his help and assistance . And in those short houres of the night , he was seene to imploy him-selfe with a great deale of diligence , as well in the affayres of his other businesses , as in the ordering and sorting of papers to send them to the Printers , as also , in the composing of more matter for the Presse , besides his attendance vpon other things , importing his owne person and house . Euery one of which would haue well required a whole man , free from all other incumbrances . And that , which he wrote in this manner , was all the whole third Booke . And though euery-where through-out in all the rest of his writings , he hath show'd the Ocean of his wit , being that therein they shall find a most rich treasure of diuers Histories moralized , and expressed with all the elegancie that can be deuised , yet this is that enamelling , that beautifies that Iewell , and sets it best forth . As all those haue affirmed , who had the good hap to haue a sight thereof .

What shall I say of this his Second Part of Guzman de Alfarache , and in how short a time he made it ? Which seemeth almost a thing impossible , being so differing from his former , which he was forced to change and to alter , casting it in a new molde , for the reasons before deliuered . This will render sufficient testimony of his worth , & bridle those rash tongues and head-strong spirits , which shall kick against him , and vainly and foolishly runne on to the wronging of their iudgements . If all that I haue said be truth , if the learned approue it , the vulgar deny it not , if the world confesseth it ; ( for here euery one may meet with that , which shall please his appetite , which Horace holds so difficult a thing , ) if vnder a prophane name he doth write so diuinely , that he may serue for a bridle to the bad , for a spurre to the good , for study to the learned , for entertainment to ordinary capacities , and in generall , for a fine Politicall , Ethicall , and Oeconomicall Schoole , and so full of sweetnesse and pleasure , that it may inuite any man to looke thereinto , and to dwell vpon that , which he shall finde there set downe , both for pleasure , and for profit . What doe I throw vpon him ? or what doe I in this , more then to pay him that , which he so iustly deserueth ? O happy Sevill , that maist amongst thy many Greatnesses , nay one of thy greatest , glory in this thy Sonne , whose laborious endeuors , and indefatigable studies , ( equalling the very best both Latines and Grecians , ) haue thus truly merited and deserued , that all the nations of the world , crowning his head with Bayes , and celebrating his name , should willingly , and with a great deale of triumph , sing forth his due prayse .

VPON THE BOOKE , and the Author thereof . POore Guzmans life , the mapp of Vice and Sinne , Story'ed by Aleman , is as a Voyce From Heau'en , shewing how thou shouldst make thy choise . The word , Shunne thou to bee what I haue bin . Who stands here as a Marke ; that thou maist see Where his ship was drown'd ; How the same was split , More through lacke of Wisedome , then want of Wit. Which was the cause of all his Misery . The dainty style of this his pleasing quill By Guzmans roguish life , aduiseth thee What an vpright and honest life should be . How this , doth leade to good ; how that , to ill . How slight so e're this fiction seeme to be , None , can be fuller , of Morality .

FRATRIS CVSTODII LVPI , LVSITANI , Ordinis Sanctissimae Trinitatis de libri vtilitate , EPIGRAMMA . SVnt duo quae pariter virtus perfecta requirit : Quòd prauè nunquam , quòd benè semper agas . Haec tibi , si cupias , vllo ne tempore desint . Auctoris geminum perlege , Lector , opus . Antoni nunquam ponat tua dextera librum . Nec tibi Guzmani pagina displiceat . Si refer as diui mores : infanda prophani Si scelera abijcias : omnia puncta fer●… Reddite Matthaeo grato pro munere g●… : Quo duce conspicuum fit piet at is iter . Planius hoc fiet , postquam ex incudibus Auctor Sustulerit plenos vtilitate libros .

AD MATTHAEVM ALEMANVM de suo GVZMANO , ΤΕΤΡΑΔΙΣΤΙCΟΝ . Ruy Fernandez de Almada . VIlibus exemplis Pharij quid grandia caelant ? Planaque cur simulant abditiore typo ? Nempè vetant Sophiae mysteria prodere vulgo Intimiusque animo pressa figura manet . His ducibus Guzmane geris , ceu Proteus alter , Plana sub obscuro , magna minore typo . Ergò cum scitè 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 dones Te sibi 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 , Hispalis almacanat .

IOANNIS RIBERII LVSITANI ad AVTHOREM , ENCOMIASTICHON . LAus , Matthaec , tibi superest post fata perennis , Quam nullo minuet tempore , tempus edax . Orbe pererrato virtutem extendere factis , Factum ingens : opus est Martis , & Artis opus , Fortunam maior variam superare labore , Herculeis maior Quiribus iste labor . Maius opus , maior labor est coluisse Mineruam : Maior & ex proprio condere Marte libros . Heroas decorare solent duo nomina , Mars , Ars : Munera tu pariter Martis & Artis habes . Mars dedit inuictum , quo tendis ad ardua , pectus : Excoluit mentem docta Minerua tuam . Ingenij monumenta tui super aethera nota , Testantur larga praestita dona manu . Multa Hispana ●…anit Musa : atqui nullus Ibera Dogmata pinxit adhuc 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 . Testis hic est codex modico qui venditur are , Attalicas superant , quas dabit emptus , opes . Cuius ab aspectu morsus compressit inanos , Inuidia , heu multis iniuriosa nimis . Zoile transuerso calamo , qui vulnera figis , I procul , en contra numina bella paras . Contra Mercurium , Phoebum , contraque Mineruam , Mortalis poterit tela mouere manus ? Quisquis auarus ades , redimis qui sanguine gemma , Gemma tibi ●…ruo venditur aere , veni . Hauris ab 〈◊〉 pericula terra : Hic liber arcanas fundet , & addet opes . Decolor est diues , fuluo quod pallet in auro , Non sunt diuitia delitiaque simul . At liber hic auri venis qui pulcher abundat , Nunc tibi delitias , diuitiasque dabit . Aureus hic certe gemma est pretiosa libellus , Quis tenui gemmam respuas are datam ?

To the Translator . LIue ( Guzman ) to a Caueat ; Liue to praise This languag'd Man ; who hath renew'd thy dayes By a new birth . Translating thee , as tho The English Rogue , were not the Picaro , But a more liuely peece . Loe , what Art hath done . Here the Reflection's brighter then the Sunne . One Language is too narrow to containe The boundlesse-rascall-froath of Guzmans braine . It cry'd for more . This Author , hearing it , Imployes his Pensill , drawes it to the quick In English colours : and so sets it forth , As Guzmans shame , and furtherer of worth . For me , to Guzman-it in Rime , or to rehearse His Prose ; were but to spoyle a Rogue in Verse . No : Let the Prose remaine : Let it commend Him , ( whom I dare not praise ) because a Friend . E. B.

To the Translator . BVt is the Rogue reuiu'd ? Is Guzman made A Spanish-English Rascall by his Trade ? T is so . And ( as our home-bred Spaniards guesse ) Hee 's printed liueliest in the English Presse . Tongues , haue but one Horizon , if they proue Each others true Interpreters ; and moue Alike to all the world . But if they feare To ioyne ; each Language has his Hemispheare . And so had Guzman . But this English 〈◊〉 , Makes it appeare to Vs , as well as Spaine . Thus , like a blazing Starre , each Author is Stretcht to a streaming length of Languages . E. B.

To the Translator . WOuld any man sit still , and yet suruay The world at large ? Or study to betray All humane Quiddities ? Or would he view All men vnmaskt , discerning false from true ? Would any man see Proteus ? Would hee see Proteus againe , and say ; That this is hee ? Or see the Moone ? And when she waxes light , Know her to be the same , at second fight ? In this same Optick-Art , who striues to thriue , Let him vse Guzman as a Perspectiue . Guzman , is all the World ; know him alone , And then yee know a Multitude in One. The Spanish , lim's him : But this English phrase , Adds life and colour ; and prolongs his dayes . The Spanish , was too small a Mapp : But this Drawes him at large ; and shewes him as hee is . Nor let the subiect of this Booke seeme ill , Because t is Guzman . Painters , shew their skill No more in Beauty then Deformity : No lesse in Deuils then a Deity . All 's one to them . Nor doe they thinke it more To draw fayre Virgins , then a Blackamore . Why then , should not a Rascall honour those , Whose Language showes him to the life in Prose ? Reade him : and as his Labour shall appeare , Commend his Pen by which he landed here . Edw: Burton .

To the worthy Gentleman the Translator . SIR , I embrace th' occasion , and am glad , After that worthy mention I haue had From both our equall Friends , of you , I finde A meanes to know the person with the minde . By what you giue vs here , you , from a wrong Wherewith she trauel'd , vindicate our Tongue . The Spanish Rogue ? Why t was a Ladd so hye , So full of Nationall proprietie , Sententious and Prouerbiall ; that his Nation Would sooner sheathe them in the Irish fashion Then he could put on English . As if here Our Language were but iust as one poore Shire For one of his profession to walke in . This 〈◊〉 wherein so many men haue bin , You haue dispers'd . And till an English straine Be taught ( as well as this ) the tongue of Spaine , Our Nephewes shall reproach it to their Heyres , This way our Wus haue ouer-master'd theirs . W. BROWNE .

THE PRINTER To the curious Reader .

IT were a hard taske and rarely to be performed , for any Printer to vndertake the printing of a Booke of this bulke and nature , without some faults ; yea , were his Copy neuer so fayre , or his Apprehension so quicke . It is a decorum in Guzman to commit many Sol●…cismes , whose life was so full of disorders . This life of his being 26. seuerall times printed in the Spanish Tongue in a few years , did neuer appeare to the world , but with Errata's : which makes me the more presuming on your humane courtesie : And as in the first , so in this Second Part , vouchsafe with your pen , the amendment of these few faults , before you begin to read the rest of his life .

EDVV : BLOVNT .

Page . Line . Fault . Correct . 32. 15. will apply apply . 39. 38. discourses discourse . 110. marg. quandem quando . 118. 20. should him say should one say . 154. 34. turning himselfe . turning my selfe ibid. 35. he sayed I sayed . 227 36 the would not they would not . ibid. 54. when I come when I came . 269. 44. shoot at shoot . 273. 51 in out it out . 293. 21. ●…d ebbe an ebbe . 335. 16. herd measure . hard measure .

The Contents of the Second Part.

THE FIRST BOOKE . CHAP. I. GVzman de Alfarache excuseth the processe of his discourse , craueth attention , giues notice of his intent ; sheweth that Lying of all other things is the worst . He treats of the ill gouernment of great men ; Of Courtiers , and their vices : Of the Spaniards loue to Radishes . Of the order and end of this Worke . CHAP. II. Guzman tells what place he serued in , in the house of his Lord Embassador : And that Fooles and Iesters , are both fit and profitable for Princes : falling into a description of their conditions and qualities . CHAP. III. Guzman recounteth that which hapned vnto him with a Captaine and a Doctor at a banquet , which the Embassadour his Lord made . CHAP. IV. The Doctor finding himselfe aggrieued , that Guzmanillo had wronged him in the presence of so many Gentle-men , would be reuenged of him . The Spanish Embassador takes vp the quarrell : The French causing another of the guests , that was there at table , to relate an accident that befell the Constable of Castile , Don Aluaro de Luna . CHAP. V. A Romane Matron , not knowing how to free her-selfe ( without suffering in her honour ) from the perswasions of Guzman , who sollicited her in his Lords behalfe the French Embassador , put a iest vpon him , which was the occasion of a second disgrace that afterwards befell him . CHAP. VI. Guzman de Alfarache recounteth , how in the house , whereinto he had withdrawne him-selfe , to make him-selfe cleane , another disgrace befell him , and many other misfortunes . And that which passed afterwards , betweene him and his Lord the Embassadour , with whom he discoursed of politike and graue matters . CHAP. VII . The iest being publikely knowne through Rome , which befell Guzman , together with the ill successe that he had with the Boore ; for very ( hame he departs from thence , and goes for Florence . In which iourney , a theefe enters into friendship with him , that he might the better vnder that colour , rob him of all that he had . CHAP. VIII . Guzman de Alfarache discourses of Deceit . He departs from Rome . He desires to see Siena , where certaine theeues meet with his trunks , which he had sent away before , and rob him of all that he had . CHAP. IX . Guzman de Alfarache , not recouering his lost goods , shrewdly complaines of the small punishment that is laid vpon theeues . Wherein he deliuereth many things worthy the noting .

THE SECOND BOOKE . CHAP. I. GVzman de Alfarache , leaues Siena , and goes for Florence . He meets with Sayavedra , whom he takes into his seruice . And before he comes to Florence , he recounts vnto him on the way , many admirable things concerning that Citie . And when he was arriued there , he shewes him all , that was worth the seeing . CHAP. II. Guzman de Alfarache goes to Bologna in pursuit of Alexandro , who had stolne his trunkes from him ; Whither , when he was come , going about to imprison Alexandro , himselfe was clapt vp . CHAP. III. Guzman de Alfarache , discourseth on the iniustice , which some Iudges doe , blinded by gaine , or by passion . CHAP. IV. Guzman de Alfarache , being freed out of prison , falls to gaming , gets money ; Whereupon , he resolues with himself to goe to Milan . CHAP. V. Guzman de Alfarache trauelling towards Milan , Sayavedra vpon the way , recounts his owne life vnto him . CHAP. VI. Sayavedra meets in Milan with a friend of his that seru'd a Merchant ; Guzman de Alfarache layes a witty plot how to rob him . CHAP. VII ▪ The robbing of the Merchant of Milan , as Guzman de Alfarache could haue wisht it . Aguilera shares so much with him , as of right belonged vnto him : And he and his seruant Sayavedra goe for Genoa . CHAP. VIII . Guzman de Alfarache comes to Genoa , where being knowne by his kindred , he is feasted by them . He perswades euery one to liue vertuously ; And showes the hurt , which Murmurers , Hypocrites , and false Witnesses , bring to mens soules , honours , and riches : He deliuereth the great profit , we shall gaine , by auoyding such venemous Basiliskes . And concludes with telling vs , who are true theeues indeed . CHAP. IX . Guzman de Alfarache robs his Vncle and Kinsmen in Genoa , and imbarkes him-selfe in the Gallies that were to goe for Spaine . CHAP. X. Guzman sayling toward Spaine , Sayavedra by reason of a great storme , growes Sea-sicke . He falls into a Calenture , or burning feuer . He waxes light-headed , and loseth his wits . He cryes out , that he is Guzman , and growing mad , throwes him-selfe into the Sea , where he is drowned .

THE THIRD BOOKE . CHAP. I. GVzman de Alfarache , hauing taken his leaue of Captaine Favelo , telling him that he was to goe for Sevill , makes for Saragoça , where he peruses the statutes of Gotam Colledge , otherwise called , The Hospitall of Fooles . CHAP. II. Guzman de Alfarache goes from Saragoça , and comes to Madrid ; where he turnes Merchant , and is marryed . Hee breakes his credit , and turnes bankrupt . He treats of womens subtle tricks . And of the inconuenience of counter-writings ; and of their remedie . CHAP. III. Guzman de Alfarache prosecutes the successe of his mariage , till such time as his wife dyed . And how her dowry returned backe to his father in Law . He discourseth of bad wiues , and the hurt they doe their husbands . CHAP. IV. Guzman being now a widower , resolues to goe to Alcala de Henarez , to studie the Arts , and Diuinitie , that he might make him-selfe fit to say Masse . And hauing fulfilled all his tearmes , and duely heard his Lectures , he leaues all and marries againe . CHAP. V. Guzman de Alfarache leaues off his studies ; he goes to liue at Madrid ; he carries his wife with him ; from whence they were both banished . CHAP. VI. Guzman and his wife come to Sevill : He findes his mother to be now somewhat ancient , and well s●…ucken in yeeres . His wife gets her away to Italy with one of the Captaines of the Gallies , leauing him alone to himselfe , and exceeding poore : whereupon he falls to his old trade of theeuing . CHAP. VII . Guzman being preserred to a Gentle-womans seruice , robs her : vpon th●… theft he is apprehended , & condemned to the Gallies during life . CHAP. VIII . Guzman de Alfarache is taken out of the prison of Sevill , to be carryed to the Port , to be put into the Gallies . He recounteth that which befell him on the way ; as likewise in the Gallies . CHAP. IX . Guzman de Alfarache prosecutes that which hapned vnto him in the Galleys : And by what meanes he came to be freed from thence .

THE ROGVE : OR , THE SECOND PART OF THE LIFE OF GVZMAN DE ALFARACHE . The first Booke . Wherein , he recounteth what befell him , from the time that he serued his Master the Lord Embassadour , till hee left Rome .

CHAP. I.

Guzman de Alfarache excuseth the processe of his discourse , craueth attention , giues notice of his intent ; sheweth , that Lying , of all other things is the worst . He treats of the ill gouernment of Great men ; Of Courtiers , and their Vices . Of the Spaniards loue to Radishes . Of the order and end of this Worke .

COME , let vs away . Thou hast now bayted and refresht thy selfe in thy Inne ; Come , I Cumpany makes the way lesse tedious . say : Arise , and let vs be gone , if thou beest willing to haue my Company , and that I should doe thee seruice in this iourney ; though there is another iourney that I must goe through with , for whose happy end I goe trauelling through these stony and desart places .

Through these craggy Rocks , and vneuen The Author goes excusing himselfe . wayes , beset with Bushes and Bryers , I doubt not but I shall make this iourney seeme easie vnto thee , with that assured promise which I shal be able to make vnto thee , of bringing thee safe to the end of thy desire .

Pardon my bold proceeding , and taxe me not of inciuilitie , that I treat with thee in this manner ; I confesse that I faile in that respect , which is due vnto such a one as thou art .

But consider , I pray' , that what I say , it is not spoken to thee , but that thou should'st reprehend others , who perhaps haue as much need of reproofe as my selfe .

I goe talking at randome , ( like those that play at blind-man-buffe ) and thou maist very well tell me , that my tongue runnes ryot , and that I talke like a foole , or a mad-man , because I shoot my bolts without feare or wit , and vnaduisedly throw the stone out of my hand , not knowing where it may light , or the harme it may doe .

But I shall answer this , with that which a foole once said , that fell a throwing of stones , who as oft as he threw , would cry out aloud , saying , Take heed , take heed , my Masters , for it cannot fall amisse ; where-euer it light , it must needs hit right . So I likewise tell thee , Que como tengo las hechas , tengo sospechas . Prouerb . That if I haue sate vpon any bodies skirts , or shall chance to sit closer vnto them , I haue reason to suspect , that they will pay me home if they can . For he that reprehends other mens faults , cannot but liue in feare of being Chi riprende l'altrui diffeto , viue con sospetto . Prouerb . told his owne .

I imagine with my selfe , that all men are iust such as I am ; weake , facill , and full of naturall passions ; nay , sometimes strange and extrauagant humours . But it were a thousand pities , that all a a Mal seria , si todos los Costales fuessen tales . Sacks should be alike . But being bad my selfe , I thinke no man good : such is my wretched condition , and of as many as beare the same minde . I conuert Violets into poyson ; throw durt vpon Snow ; and in my thought , trample the fresh and fragrant Rose vnder my feete . It might in some sort haue beene happy for mee , that I had stayd when I was well , and had not gone on with this my discourse .

I know , that albeit I haue beene troublesome vnto thee , thou wilt hold me excused , and therefore I shall not need to craue thy pardon , and to begge thy good word and attention ; the purchasing whereof , is that which I principally pretend : And albeit many , and peraduenture all those that haue tasted of the Apple , will deeme it to be impertinent and superfluous .

But mee thinkes it is not possible that it should bee so . For albeit I should be as bad as thou wouldst make me to be , or that I were such an arrant Asse and Coxe-combe , as you forsooth in your Idea would forme me to be ; yet cannot I perswade my selfe , that thou hadst set thy figure right , or that thy iudgement were truely grounded . For no man thinkes himselfe to be the same man , that other men would make him to be ; nor iudges himselfe by anothers opinion . I thinke of my selfe , as thou thinkest of thy selfe . Euery man holds his owne fashion the best ; his owne life , the vprightest ; his owne cause , the iustest ; his owne honour , the greatest ; and his owne conceits , those that hit rightest . I tooke counsell of my pillow , it seeming vnto mee ( which indeed is true ) that a prudent consideration doth euermore beget happy euents ; and that too much haste is the mother of various and vnfortunate issues ; whose Handmaid is repentance . For doe you graunt but one absurditie , and a thousand will follow vpon it . And therefore , that the ends may not erre , ( as too too vsually it hapneth , ) it is fit , that wee make a faithfull examination of the principles ; which being found out , and well chosen , they affoord vs that helpe , that wee may Principia prius quaerenda . boldly say , that the better halfe of the worke is already finished , reaching forth such a resplendour and fulnesse of light vnto vs , that afarre off , by naturall signes and tokens , they discouer those things vnto vs , which are likely to happen hereafter .

And howbeit in themselues , they are in substance small , yet in their vertue and operation , they are great , and are in a disposition to matters of much importance .

And therefore , when we will experiment them , we must propose all the difficulties , examining them with all diligence , seeking to draw all the good out of them that we can , and the soundest counsell ; but when we are once resolued that they are actions of Prudence , and so generally taken and esteemed , they ought in all mens iudgements to be brauely followed , and put in execution : And by so much the more , by how much the more noble shall that enterprize be , which we pretend to vndertake .

And it is an imperfection , and a notable note of lightnesse , to enterprize To begin things , and not to goe thorow with them , argues lightnesse . Prouerb . How a good son in Law ought to carry himselfe towards his father in Law . those things ▪ which we cannot effect , especially if they be not crost by some sudden and vnexpected accident , or some great impediment or other ; for in their end , consisteth our glory .

My purpose only was ( as I told thee before ) to benefit thee , and to teach thee the way , how thou mightest with a great deale of content and safetie , passe thorow the gulph of that dangerous sea wherein thou saylest . The blowes I shall receiue , thou the good counsels ; The hunger is mine , but the industry must be thine , that thou mayst not suffer hunger . I indure those affronts , from whence thy honour rises . And since thou hast heard it said , Que à que se te hizo rico , que te hizo el pico . That is , that he that made thee rich , made thee likewise to open thy beake , that thou mightest be ready to receiue a blessing .

And therefore thou must striue to imitate that discreet sonne in Law , who knowes by the sweetnesse of his behauiour and courteous carriage , how to gaine the good will of his hard-laced father in Law , and to draw him gently along , to pay his house-rent , to bestow vpon him his dyet , and his lodging , to put money in his Purse , and for an vp-shot , a faire wife in his bed ; And these are those father in Lawes which ( like slaues , and common iesters ) breed , serue , and entertaine their children .

I am now imbark't , I haue set foot a Ship-boord , & I cannot goe backe . The Dice are throwne ; my promise is past , and I cannot recall it . I haue begun , and I must goe on . The Subiect is meane and base ; the beginning small ; But that which I intend to treat of , if like the Oxe , thou wilt ruminate thereupon , and chew the Cud , suffring it to passe from thy stomacke to thy mouth , it may proue important , graue , and great . I will doe all that I can to satisfie thy desire ; knowing ▪ that I should haue rather giuen thee trouble , then content , in vnfolding one part of my life , and hyding the other from thee .

I perswade my selfe , that many will , or haue already said it ; Better had it beene , that God had neuer giuen it thee , and by consequence , that thou hadst neuer spoke of it ; for being notoriously bad and wicked , it had beene better for thy selfe to haue smothered it ; and for others , that they had not knowne it . Thou art farre wide of the truth ; thou hast no good ground for that thou say'st : much lesse therefore can I be perswaded , that thou meanest well , or that thy drift herein is so faire and honest , as thou wouldst seeme to make shew of ; But I am rather afraid , and doe shrewdly suspect , that because they touch thee to the quicke , the very wagging of the rod doth ( though it ne're come neere thee ) much affright thee ; thine owne guiltines makes thee to shrinke ; and it is the gall'd backe , that makes the Horse winse , before the Saddle touch him .

There is no a a Mens whipping of themselues , is vs'd by religious persons , for to more fie the ●…sh , and in remembrance of those stripes , which our Sauiour suffered for vs . There are some that ●…sh themselues meerely out of Ostentation . These are fooles , and as abominable as Baals Priests . The Prelates of the Church , and other secular Mogistrates should take order to debarie those to goe in Procession , that vse it so prophanely , and to punish them seuerely , for ●…ose their ro●… excesses , w●…ch I am asham'd to speake of . an Germany , there was a Sect of Herelikes , called Flagellantes , that were notable Villaines , and Drunkards , and condemned for such . Vide Couarruuias . Verb. Diciplinarse . L●…es haue euer the best attention . Disciplinante that whips himselfe in the holy weeke , that doth at any time complaine of his owne lashing , nor doth halfe so much feele the smart of those stripes which he giues himselfe , as he doth the paine and anguish of anothers hand , when he comes to dresse and cure his wounds .

I either tell thee truthes or lyes . Not lyes . Would to God they were lyes . For I know , that out of thine owne naturall inclination , thou wouldst bee well content to heare them ; nay , to play and champe vpon that bitt , it would make thee carry a white mouth , pleasing thy selfe with the some and froth of vntruthes . But I deliuer truths vnto thee ; and these are as bitter Pils vnto thy Palate . Thou findest fault with them , because they lay open thy faults . Only displeased , because they please thee not . If thou finde thy selfe sound and in health , and thy neighbour sicke and weake ; if the Lightning shall light vpon another mans house , and thine owne scape the flame , thou wouldst the better beare it , so as thou be left vntoucht , no morsell is vnsauory to thy mouth , all is Phesant and Partridge , and I shall be well receiued , and kindely entertained by thee . But that thou mayst not ( like the Eele ) slip out of my hands , I will seeke out some Fig-leaues against these your slippery tricks , I will hold you fast while I haue you ; you shall not for this once , so easily ( as you thinke ) escape my hands .

I tell thee , ( if thou art willing to heare me , if thou wilt not , thou mayst choose ) that this generall confession that I make ; this publike opening of my Packe , laying before thee all my Knacks , and my Trinkets ; I doe not therefore shew these things vnto thee , that thou shouldst either imitate me , or my euill actions ; but rather , that ( when thou shalt come to know them ) thou mayst learne thereby to correct thine owne . If thou seest me falne , because I was wilfull , and would not be ordred ; looke thou so well to thy steps , that thou mayst hate and auoyd those occasions , that wrought my Take the good , and leaue the bad . fall . Set not thy foot , where thou hast seene me slip before thee ; but let my trippings and my stumblings , serue as so many markes to make thee more wary . For thou art a man , mortall as I am , and peraduenture neither stronger , nor wiser then my selfe .

Looke well into thy selfe ; runne ouer very leisurely and carefully , the house Looke well into thy selfe , and let others alone . of thy Soule , and see if thou haue not made there , euen in the greater and better part of it , Dung-hils of filth , and all manner of beastlinesse ; and doe not sift and prie so narrowly into thy neighbours , to see if thou canst finde but the feather of some bird at the foot of the Stayres , whereat thou mayst picke a quarrell .

But heere I know thou wilt tell me , that I preach vnto thee , and that hee is a foole , that will seeke his cure , from a sicke Physician . And that hee that Medice , cura teipsum . cannot helpe himselfe , can hardly giue health to others .

What wholsome Medicine , or good Cordiall , can a man haue from a Vipers tooth , or the sting of a Scorpion ? How shall he , that is ill himselfe , aduise another not to be ill ? I doe not denie , that I am such a one as thou sayst : But that will befall me with thee , which betideth some nimble and cunning Caruer at his Lords table , who curiously cutteth vp the Brawne , the wing , or the legge of some dainty Fowle , and hauing respect to the qualitie of the Guests , whom he is to serue , giues euery man his seuerall Plate , studying to please and content them all ; They all eate , all rest satisfied and well contented , whilest he himselfe goes away both weary and hungry .

At mine owne cost and paines , I discouer shelfes , quick-sands , and dangerous rockes vnto thee , to the end that thou mayst not fall vpon them , and dash thy selfe in pieces against them , or runne thy selfe on ground , where there is neuer any hope of comming off .

Your Arsenicke is not altogether vnprofitable , but that it will serue for some good vse or other ; it is worth money , and it is sold in Apothecaries shops . And though it be bad to eate , as it may be applyed , it will proue good . In a word , with it those Wormes and Vermine are poysoned , which bring hurt and preiudice to mans body .

My example might serue as Treacle to a Common-wealth , if these fierce beasts that gouerne it were poysoned ; not excusing house-keepers , though The hurt which ill gouernment , ●…ses in great mens houses . neuer so much in apparance , seeming familiar and friendly vnto vs , as being one of the worst qualities that they haue . For , figuring forth our selues vnto them , to be men of flesh and bloud , kinde-hearted , and subiect vnto passions , wee deposit our secrets in their bosomes , and trust them with all that we haue , as relying on their saith and their loue , and they cunningly shed Tricks of Courtship . feigned teares in a seeming commiseration of our miseries , when in the meane while not-withstanding , they rend our flesh , & teare our very sinewes from the bone with their tyrannies , iniuries , and violencies .

O that it were in my power to consume and destroy another sort of cruell beastes , as those that looke bigge , and grow proud of their ease and plenty , goe vaunting and boasting of their valour , tearing vp the stones in the streets , world-wandrers , Vagabonds from Countrie to Countrie , from Parish to Parish , and from house to house , making them-selues skimmers of other mens pottes , being no way of any profit , or seruing for any other vse , then the Porters in the a a Al●…ondiga is a house appointed for Country people , to bring their corne into the Citie , and there to lay it vp . It signifieth also a Ware house for merchandize , where some bring in , and some carry out . Vid. Couarru . pag. 48. Alhondiga of Seuilla , to lay in one burthen , and to take out another ; venting lyes in one place , and taking them vp in another , carrying newes to and fro , reporting those things , that he ought to haue silenced , being trusted therewith , and will'd to be secret , vttering them in preiudice of the person to whom he reuealeth them , who cannot but take it ill ; maliciously causing differences , and relating things worse then they were meant ; bearers of false witnesse , raysers of dissension , robbers of mens honours , defaming the good , persecuting the iust , stripping men of their wealth , and murthering and martyrizing the innocent . It were a pleasing sight to see all such perish , and to be made a publike spectacle to the world . Nor is there in all Bruxels any such goodly hangings , that doe either so much adorne , or halfe so well become any Noble mans house , as these would the Common-wealth , if they were hung vp one after another by the Common Hang-man .

For , it is very fit , that there should be Poena & praemium ; A punishment and a reward . For if all were good and honest , Lawes had beene superfluous Lawes were made for the wicked . and impertinent . And if all men should haue beene wise , Writers had beene fooles . Phisicke was made for the sicke ; Honours for the vertuous ; and the Gallowes for lewd liuers . And because I likewise know , that Vice is so powerfull , for that it rises out of a desire of libertie , without acknowledgement of any Superiour either humane or diuine , I am much afraid , that these my written labours , and my many indured misfortunes , will not be of force to bridle thy vnruly appetites , and to bring forth that good fruit which I could wish ; Holding that paines vaine and fruitlesse , which is vndertaken When a mans labour is lost . vpon any respect whatsoeuer , if it doth not in that it pretendeth , obtaine it's desired end . But because that the Rhethorician doth not alwaies perswade ; nor the Physician cure ; nor the Pilot arriue safely at his Port ; I must together with them comfort my selfe , in that I haue performed my dutie , by giuing thee good counsell , and by affording thee light , being therein like the Flint , which being strooken , giues fire to others , to bee kindled in this or that place , though it selfe remaine without : In like manner , the lewd liuer loseth his life , receiueth punishment , and indureth affronts , making himselfe an example to all those that shall looke vpon him .

But here I will betake me to that way , which presents it selfe vnto mee in this place ; Imitating therein your rude Clownes , as also your nice Courtiers , who passing along by the b b Roperia . i. Locus Vestimentarius . Roperia ( which is a publike place where all sorts of cloathes are to bee sold ; ) if by chance they lift vp their eyes , and looke vpon them , those Merchants that sell these commodities , ( like your Birchen-Lane men ) fall presently a balling and plying of them ; one drawes him this way , another that , and keepe such a calling , and such a tugging of them , that they know not well which way to turne or winde themselues , they are so distracted by them .

For they hauing an opinion ( if not a thorow'perswasion ) that they doe all deceiue , all coozen , and lye , they goe warily to worke , when they buy any wares of them ; & I well wot the cause why , which I need not to tell you , The ●…ery of so●… Tredes-men . because that which they sell , will speake it out alowd , without any other bodies helpe .

Well , let vs now giue them way , and suffer them to passe by , if for no other reason , at least for those fauours and courtesies which I haue had from Receiuers of stoln goods . them , in the buying of things that were neuer bought , giuing me good money for that which I brought , and sold vnto them ; and for teaching mee from ouer-night against the next morning , how to make Cassocks of Cloakes , selling them the shreds for to foot Stockins , and to make soles to keepe the feet warme , and free from wet .

Or shall I here tell thee , that the same is like to befall me , which vsually happens to the carelesse traueller ; who not knowing the way , goes from The case of a carelesse traueller . home , neuer inquiring how he may hit it , which hand to take , or what turnings to make ; so that when hee hath gone some halfe league on his iourney , he chanceth to come to the foot of a Crosse , where he meetes with three or foure seuerall wayes ; and straining himselfe vpon his stirrops , writhing his body , he turnes his head about , to see if he can espy any body , that is able to direct him in his way ?

But seeing none there at hand , he fals to a Cosmographicall consideration with himselfe , choosing either this , or that , which shall seeme likeliest vnto him , to leade directly towards that place , whither hee intended his iourney .

I see heere present before me so many diuers dispositions , and such various and sundry sorts of tasks , all of them hanging about mee , euery one striuing to hale and pull mee as it were by force , to come into their shop . But God he knowes , why , and wherefore they doe it .

One would haue sweet and pleasant things ; another , those that are tart and sowre ; this man will haue his Oliues fryde ; that will no salt , no not The diuers gusts and palates of men . with an Egge .

And if one man haue a minde to eate the legge of a a a The Spanish word , is pie de la perdis , but the other fits better with our phrase of ●…peach . Larke rosted in the snuffe of a Candle , another would not be wanting , who shall make no bones to tell they , that of all the pulse and rootes that God made , there was neuer any yet that could compare and come neere to the Radish for goodnesse .

The truth whereof was to bee seene in a certaine b b Papelistas ; Los que son dados à entender en papeles . Couarruuias . A short tale of a couetous Spaniard . Papelisticall Minister , a kinde of Officer ( as I may so tearme him ) betwixt a Clerke and a Scriuener that is conuersant in Paper-businesses ; a fellow wonderfull ill belou'd , a notorious lyer , and aboue all , extremely couetous ; who remouing from one house to another , after that he had carried his houshold-stuffe , and other old moueables belonging there-vnto , he stayd there behinde alone by himselfe , searching and prying very diligently into euery nooke and corner thereof , rifling and ransaking it from the floore to the roofe , not so much as leauing a nayle to the walles , for to hang a Hat on , or the like necessary vse .

At last , it was his hap to come into the Kitchen , where hee lighted vpon an odde hole in the chimney , wherein were three or foure Radishes , which had lyen there a long time , being dry , tough , withered , and good for nothing . These hee charily tyes vp in one bunch , and very carefully brings them home to his Wife , and with a Black-Smithes face , looking frowningly vpon her , he said vnto her ; Is this your good hous-wifery , this your care of my house and goods , to let things runne to spoyle ? Is money so easily come by ( thinke you ) that you make no more reckning of sauing a penny ? But as you brought me nothing in Dowry , so you care not ( it seemes ) which end goes forward ; sinke , or swimme , all 's one to you . See you this waste of yours ? Looke I pray vpon these Radishes , they cost money I can tell you . You haue done well , haue you not , to looke no better vnto them ? Keepe them I pray against I call for them . I thinke there is not a more wastefull woman in the world ; but I am the worse of the two , and may thanke my selfe , that I would be such an vnthrift as to bring a whole bunch into the house at once , when as fewer would haue seru'd the turne .

His wife laid them vp safe , as he had willed her , and that very night ( that they might not fall out any more about them ) the crafty Hileding , very demurely and with a sober countenance , without any the least shew of choller , or dislike , sets them downe before him , when hee was sitting downe to supper , who falling earnestly vnto them , spake to his Wife , and said :

Now in troth ( Wench ) I sweare vnto thee , there is no meat in the world can rellish better , or hath halfe so good a sauour and taste with it , as an old Radish . I protest vnto thee , I like them better a thousand times , being thus lyther , and withered as you see , then when they are fresh and cripsie . I prethee Wife proue one of them , and then tell me if it bee not as I say .

The poore woman had as little fancie to make tryall thereof , as shee had faith to beleeue it ; but my Spaniard ( carrying as they doe all a kinde of high The Spaniard generally carries a great command ouer his Wife . hand ouer their wiues ) forcing her in a manner there-vnto , by his sterne both lookes and words , made her to eate one sore against her will , and much against her stomake .

There are a certaine kinde of men , which are not contented onely to commend that , which they themselues like , ( be it what it will ) but they The capri●…ious humours of some extrauagant persons . will ( and are angry and offended if it bee otherwise ) that others doe the same , pressing them , as it were , to follow their humour , and contrarie to their owne will , seeme to approue it , at least not sticke to praise it .

And there are likewise another sort of people , which discommend other mens tastes ; not considering , that de gustibus non est disputandum , for that they are diuers and various , as are the conditions and countenances of men .

For though peraduenture two may bee found , that may resemble one another , yet it is impossible that they should be so like , that you may not perceiue some difference . And therefore I must be driuen to doe that heere , which was my hap once to doe at a Comedy ; where , for that I was one of the first , it was my fortune to be one of the formost before the Stage . Writers , wherevnto they are likened .

Now those that came after , being nothing so well fitted , spake vnto me , that I would leane a little on t 'one side . I did so ; but in this my mouing some-what aside , others thought much of it , complaining that I hindred their sight ; for whom likewise to giue them content , I was forced to shift a foote . So that , both the one and the other , made me to stand where they would haue me . For they were all willing to see . Insomuch , that not knowing how to accommodate my selfe for pleasuring of them , I put on Merchants eares , not vouchsafing to giue them the hearing : and standing stiffely Prouerb . on my right legge , gaue them leaue to shift for themselues , to heare , and see , as well as they could .

The Melancholly man , the Sanguine , the Chollericke , the Flegmaticke , the Ciuill , the Swaggerer , the Rhetorician , the Philosopher , the Religious , No writer can please all . the Reprobate , the Courtier , the Clowne , the rude , the Discreet , nay , euen my Lady Ninny-hammer would that I should onely write for her pleasure , words finely pleyted , and curiously folded , and that I should apply my selfe to her conceit , and conforme my selfe according to her stile , making her Mistresse both of my pate and Pen.

It is not possible for me to second so many humours , and to satisfie such different desires : For then had I need ( besides the making for euery particular man his seuerall Booke , ) to liue so many mens liues , as there are sundry The Author approueth this to be his true Second Part. opinions .

I haue liu'd but one onely ; and that which they would falsely intitle mee withall , is a testimonie against some , of the great wrong they haue done me therein .

My true life , I shall onely set it downe my selfe . I will goe prosecuting of that , though they goe persecuting of me . For there will not another (a) Gill Prou. Nunca falta vn Gil , que no●… persigua . Dando à entender , que aunque desista vn emulo no falta otro que se substituya ensu lugar . No sooner one corriuall gone , but another comes in his place . The Authors end and purpose . be wanting for the third Part , to come forth against mee , as in the Second ; and charge me with that , which I neuer either did , said , or thought .

That , which I intreat at thy hands , is ; That thou wilt neither feare mee so much , nor be angry with me in so high a measure , that ( I know not out of what humour ) thou should'st wish me hang'd ; for I finde not my selfe fit for it at this time , neither indeed doe I deserue it . Suffer mee therefore to liue , since it hath pleased God to giue mee life , that I might correct my errours ; and time , that I may amend my faults .

For my punishments , and my mis-fortunes , if thou wilt truely informe thy selfe of them , will serue thee in stead of a Looking-glasse , whereby thou may'st see how to linke a little better together the past , and the present , with that which is to come in the third Part ; to the end , that thou making it all one continued piece of worke , weauing it well and handsomely , running along in euen threds , thou maist the better ( which is no more then becomes thee ) be instructed in the truth of things .

And this is that marke , whereat I haue aymed , and the white , which I seeke to hit . Nor am I dainty in discouering my conceits , to those that will bee pleased to saue mee this labour : yet , let it bee so carried , that they may boast them of that 's their owne . For I hold it as a thing vndecent , and vnseemely , for a man to deny his owne name , and to put forth his workes vnder that of another , which hath , and shall vpon the like occasion , oblige mee at any time , to write so much againe as this , that I may not beetaken for a Foole , by taking vpon mee other mens ouer-sights . But let this rest , lest I might seeme to some , to speake more out of passion , then reason ; though the iudicious ( I am perswaded ) will excuse this my iust complaint , and not thinke it in this place to be impertinent to the purpose .

But to returne againe into the way , whence we haue stept a little aside , I say ; That I would haue euery man to make choyse of his owne Plate , and Of the order and end of this Booke : And wherevnto it is likened . to fall to that dish ( amongst those many , that we shall serue into this boord ) which hee hath most minde vnto ; Leauing that vnto others , which shall not please his palate , or not agree with his stomake . Nor would I haue my guests to thinke , that this booke of mine should bee like vnto Heliogabalus his banquet , whose boord was furnished with many and sundry sorts of meates , yet all of them only seruing for the food & sustenance of man , whether they were Peacocks , Chickens , Phesants , wilde Boare , Fish , Milke , Sallets , or Conserues , it was one onely kinde of Vyand , but like Manna , differenced by mens seuerall tasts ; howbeit those of Manna , were as euery man would haue them to rellish as himselfe desired ; but these other , according as the Cooke was willing to season them , seeking therein to please the filthy luxurious throat of his Master . With varietie , nature is adorned ; this is that , that beautifies the Fields , to see heere Hils , there Vallies ; in this place Brookes and Riuers ; in that Fountaines sprinkling and sparkling forth their pearled drops .

Let not men be so couetously minded , as to desire to haue all to themselues . I haue seene the bestowing of many Liueries in my life-time , and the little Page , ( I haue perceiued ) was as well contented with his , though it were not so full of Silke , as the tallest man , that had twice as much as he , in regard of the largenesse of his stature . I am resolued to follow that path , that shall seeme best vnto me , for the more direct bringing of me to the end of my desire , and to that place , whereunto I intend my iourney . And thou ( my discreet Host ) who stay'st looking for me , since thou doest so well vnderstand and know the miseries , that he suffers and indures , who ( like my selfe ) goes trauelling abroad to see the world ; doe not looke scornefully vpon me , when thou shalt meet with me in thine owne Countrie , and though I come to thy Gate like a Rogue , poore and pennilesse , dis-fauoured by fortune , and forsaken of my friends , yet doe thou vouchsafe mee a cheerefull countenance , and giue me that kinde entertainment , which thou owest vnto thine owne worth . For my errand is only to thee , thee only doe I seeke after , and for thy sake haue I vndergone this iourney , not for to put thee to any charge ; nor with purpose to oblige thee to more then thy good will and affection , which thou naturally owest vnto him , who offers thee his loue : Which if I shall receiue from thee , I shall rest fully satisfied , and remaine besides , in requitall of thy good will , indebted vnto thee in an infinite number of thankes .

But if they which take pleasure in hearing me talke , if they shall likewise be desirous to see me , let them beware , that doe not befall them , which is wont to happen to those that are ouer-curious , who watch and listen , to heare what is said of them ; Which kinde of men doe alwayes Malè audire , heare no great good spoken of them . For with the finest gold , is the bitterest Prouerb . Con oro fino , se cubre la pildora . Pill couered . And often-times , that moueth some to laughter , which indeed ought to draw teares from their eyes .

Besides , if any man shall long to know the life that I lead , and the place where I liue , he shall therein bewray his owne needlesse curiositie , and giue me iust cause to suspect the vniustnesse of his intent , and the little good loue that he beares me .

Let him first apply himselfe to consider my state and condition , and the great miserie , whereunto my disorder brought me . Let such another as I am , be set before him , or let his owne imagination represent it vnto him , and then shall he presently be able to goe discoursing with himselfe , what passe-time may be made with him , who doth passe his time ( being a Prisoner and laden with Irons ) with a Renegador , or some ruffianly blaspheming officer , that looks to the sure chaining of the slaues in the Gallies ; vnlesse happely he will take pleasure in my miseries , and make himselfe merry with them , as some doe with the Bull that is brought in the Market-place to be bayted , whose Dartes sticking in his sides , whose stroakes and wounds glad the beholders ; though I for my part , hold it an inhumane act . And if thou shalt twit mee in the teeth , and tell me , that either I cause nauseousnesse in this my Discourse , or that I fell it vnto thee at too deare a rate , seeking forsooth to be intreated , or that I straine too much courtsie , or that I am a little too coy , and too nice with you , making my selfe more daintie then needeth , or that by my indearings and flatteries , I should commend it for good vnto thee ; it would grieue me , that thou shouldst haue that conceit of me .

For albeit it be wellknowne , that I alwayes seru'd my Lord Embassadour as a merry companion , and to make his Lordship laugh at my pleasant and witty conceits ; for I could then make him sport , when I knew not so much as I doe now ; and now that I know more , I can not doe it . For it is a thing that costs a man deare , and the times are not still alike .

But that thou mayst well vnderstand what I say , and know what my iests and merriments were then , and what now shall be thought necessary in that kinde , hearken , I beseech you , with attention to that , which I shall deliuer vnto you in this insuing Chapter .

CHAP. II.

Guzman de Alfarache tels what place he seru'd in , in the house of his Lord Embassadour : And that Fooles and Iesters , are both fit and profitable for Princes : falling into a description of their conditions and qualities .

FRom the great power , and little vertue now a-dayes in men , it so commeth to passe , that faithfull seruants are not so Why great men respect more a pleasant co●…ited fellow , then a faithfull and painfull seruant ? much rewarded for their good seruices , and personall paines-taking , as for the sweet words , flowing from their vaine tongues ; For the one , they thinke to bee due vnto them , out of their powerfulnesse and their greatnesse , and therefore are not pleased to accept it in good worth , or thankefully to esteeme and acknowledge it . And for the other , they afford them , ( for their wits sake ) many graces and fauours ; and because they want it themselues , they buy out this default with their money . It is great pitie , that these men should thinke , that Vertue should derogate from Noblenesse ; and by their ill-conceiued opinion of it , will not ( as a thing abhorred by them ) vse and exercise the same . Why great men study not vertue .

And for that it is likewise to be purchased and gotten with a great deale of difficultie , and by hard and sharpe meanes , ( things that are contrary to their sensualitie , and quite repugnant to their power and greatnesse ) they are neuer without flatterers at their eares and elbowes , smoothing vp vice , and stroaking their euill actions , with a soft and gentle hand .

This is that milke which they haue sucked ; thefe , those swathing-cloathes wherein they were wrapped ; They made it their naturall Center by vse , and by al use it continueth still with them . Hence arise those superfluous and excessiue expences , those profuse prodigalities , and those vaine magnificencies , which are soone payd , and quickly told out , ( when the money is powred forth on the table ) but with a great many sighes and teares , when they see how they haue fool'd it away .

It is a lamentable case to see , that a Noble-man should bestow a rich suite of cloathes vpon a Foole and common Iester , and scarce giue a cast hat to the Why great Lords fauour flatterers . vertuous to couer his head . But this is a reciprocall kinde of giuing , a chop and change , that runnes currant among them . For they apparell their bodies with good cloathes , and these in requitall , cloath their mindes with toyes , and idle vanities : They throw many fauours on those , who softly smooth their humours , with sweet and pleasing words , such as shall sound handsomely , and haue their cadence and consonancie correspondent to their disposition .

But they buy this their pleasure at too deare a rate , and not vniustly neither , for that their praise passeth thorow the mouthes of such kinde of men , leauing the gate carelesly open , for the better sort to publish their vanities ; they falsely conceiuing , that that shall redound greatly to their honour and praise , which in truth and in very deed they ought to esteeme as a reproch and shame vnto them . Yet will I not therefore say ; that great Princes should not haue their Pastimes ; it is fit , that they should haue their entertainments and recreations ; but withall , in their due place and season : For all things haue their time and their reward .

A witty lester is sometimes as necessary , and as vse-full as a wise Counsellour . Fooles and Iesters , are sometimes necessary . Prouerb . When money is well spent . Nor doe I thinke it meet , that their hands should be bound from giuing , gratifying , and fauouring of them ; For money , ( as I said before ) Nunca se goza , si no quando se gasta . We neuer inioy it , but when we spend it . And it is neuer said to be spent , when it is well and wisely bestowed . For I my selfe ( in punishment of my sinnes ) haue had experience of the one and the other ; and can make this good vnto you out of mine owne proper actions , the smart whereof I haue since soundly felt . For , at that time as I seru'd my Lord Embassadour ( as you haue formerly vnderstood ) I was his Fauourite , and as it were the apple of his eye ; And I can assure thee , that any other corporall A Iester , a painefull kinde of Trader . labour would haue beene of lesse trouble vnto me , and not haue laine halfe so heauily vpon my shoulders : For to vtter pleasant conceits , witty iests , and to giue a frumpe , or a flout with a grace , that it may take handsomely , there must many things concurre and iumpe well one with another .

Hereunto will be required a particular gift of nature , which shall giue credit and grace thereunto , with a ioynt coniuncture in the carriage of the countenance , shape , and motion of the body and eyes ; So that the one may helpe the other , and euery one by it selfe , haue it 's particular grace , that meeting all together , they may moue the more .

For one selfe-same thing may be deliuered by two different persons ; The one after such a manner , that he will make thee vnbutton a a The Spanish phrase is , Qui-●…tar el calçado , y desnudar la camisa . thy doublet , and be ready to burst with laughing . The other , with that ill grace , that thou wilt thinke the doore too farre off , and too narrow to get out quickly , and be gone . And let such a one striue all that he can , to giue his iestes that life , and that grace , that is fit and necessary for them , yet it is not possible ( if they doe not well become him , and come cleanely and nimbly from him ) that hee should hit the marke he aimes at .

There will likewise be required a continuall reading , to know how , and Necessary things for a Iester . when ; and from what hee is to forme his Conceits . Hee hath likewise need of a strong and able memorie , for the keeping in minde of all those accidents that haue , and doe daily happen abroad in the world , and the knowledge of all sorts of persons , that he may know how to apply and accommodate that which is to be said , with that , of whom it shall be said .

He must take a great deale of care in the inquiry of those things , that are most worthy the reprouing of other mens liues , and most of all , in those that are most noble . For , neither making of faces , freenesse of tongue , gestures of the body , life and quicknesse of the eye , sundry sorts of Matachines , and mimicke actions , nor all the skill and wit in the world shall bee auaylable to moue the minde of one that is vaine , if they be not seazoned with the Pepper and Salt of Murmuration .

That little touch of tartnesse , that corne of Salt , that drop of Vineger , is Tart iests take best . that which giues a good rellish , and a pleasant farewell to all the rest , be it neuer so simple , neuer so vnsauorie . For what is otherwise , is accounted but a dull Picture , a course piece of worke , and the playne artifice of a poore wit .

It will also much concerne him , to consider the opportunitie , and the time , Iests must not bee vnseasonable . when , and wherein he is to breake his iests . For , being deliuered out of season , and not to the purpose , they vtterly lose their grace . For men will not alwayes be willing to heare them , neither are they alwayes , and at all times to be vented ; nor they themselues alwayes able to broach them . Aske but this question of him that hath the strongest and ablest wit amongst them ; Take the best Iester of them all vpon the sudden , and put him to exercise his ierkes of wit , and to play his pleasant prankes , and you shall finde him frozen , and not able to open his mouth .

This befell Sisneros , ( a most famous Comedian ) talking with Mançanos , Sisneros , & Mançanos , Two famous fellowes for their quicke wits . ( who was no lesse famous then himselfe , and both of Toledo ) being a paire of wits , not to bee paralel'd in their time ; to whom Sisneros said ; Thou seest , Mançanos , that all the world doth take vs for two of the pleasantest and happiest wits that this present Age affordeth .

Tell me , doest thou thinke , that vpon this same that goes of vs , the King our Master will cause vs to be sent for , and to come before him ? But say it should so fall out : then let you and I come in together ▪ and when wee haue both done him that due reuerence that becomes vs , if we shall afterwards stand solemnely before him ( hauing sent for vs vpon the opinion of out wits ) it is a thousand to one , that the first question that he will aske vs , will be this ; Are you Man●…os and Cisheros ? Then you shall make answere and say , Yea and it like your Maiestie , for I will not speake a word . Then will hee ( as it is very likely ) say againe vnto vs ; Come , let vs heare some pleasant conceits come from you .

Now , I would faine know of thee , what we should doe in this case , and what answere we shall make him ? Mançanos told him ; Brother Cisneros , when it comes to that , ( which God forbid ) there is no other to bee made , but this ; That they are not yet fryde . So that , neither to all , nor of all , nor at all times are they to be spoken , and when they are to be in request , they are not worth a figge , nor the least haire of thy head , vnlesse they be nipping ones , and dipt in the sawce of Murmiration . And I held this to be one of my greatest vnhappinesse , that like a setting dogge , I was driuen to winde out other mens weakenesses .

But because this was the fifth element , without the which those other A 〈◊〉 must apply himselfe to please others . foure cannot well subsist : and that repugnancie and contrarietie doth conserue them ; I was continually carefull in seeking out that , which to that office which I now professed , was necessarily required , that I might still goe getting of ground , and accommodate other mens tastes to mine owne . For the better and more essentiall part is , to winne the good-will of those that heare him , that they may the more willingly commend that , which by him is eyther said , or done . So that , those indowments which Nature had deny'de me , I was forced to make good by tricks and deuices , assuming to my selfe illicit licence of language , and vsing preiudiciall darings and boldnesse , which were much holpen by a particular kinde of viuacitie , liuelinesse , and quicknesse both of wit and spirit that I had in mee , hauing ( God hee knowes ) no learning at all . For then I had no more knowledge but of a few languages , which I had learned in my Lord Cardinals house ; and those too were as yet but rawe in mee , in regard of my greene yeeres .

Consider therefore I pray' with mee ( which you may easily gather out of that I haue told you ) what I might haue in me , and what was wanting vnto me , being not left to mine owne liberty , and liuing in necessitie .

In those my yonger dayes , and in that Spring-time ( as I may so tearme it ) of my flourishing yeeres , all went currantly with mee ; all that I did , became me well , and to all did I fit and apply my selfe ▪

For these , and other the like things annexed there-vnto , I was alwayes Guzman , the 〈◊〉 man with his Master . well clad , much made of , I was the Fauorite , the familiar friend , the Master of my Master , as also of all those that were interessed in his friendship .

I was the principall doore , whereby they entred into his grace and fauour , and onely I the Lord of his Will. I kept the golden key of his secrets . Hee had sold his libertie vnto me , and I was bound to looke well vnto it , and to take care thereof , not onely out of that , but euen for charities sake , and the respect I owe to the Law of Nature , as also for the particular loue , that hee bare to mee , and I to him . For hee was not ignorant , but had made often tryall of my secresie , and with what great sufferance I did euer silence those things that hee committed to my bosome ; which I would none should vnlocke but himselfe , who onely had that key , to open and shut at his pleasure .

It comes now into my minde , and so liuely represents it selfe to my thoughts , that me thinkes I was then like to a trumpe Card , which euery 〈◊〉〈◊〉 , when , and how hee list ; or as a common pack-Saddle , that serues for all Horses ▪ All did make vse of mee , though after a di●…ers and different fashion ; some , of my actions , for their owne proper interest ; and others , of my words , for their pleasure and delight ; onely my Master drew in the same yoke with me , both in words , and deeds .

I haue taken occasion to speake thus much , that men may not conceiue this opinion of mee , that I goe about to taxe those Princes , that keepe Fooles and Iesters in their Palaces , for their intertainment , and pleasure .

Nor shall it bee amisse that they intertaine them in their houses , not so much for sport and pastime , as by that conduit-pipe , to draw some-thing Why Iesters are to be permitted in Princes Courts . to their knowledge , which would not so well and so cleanely bee conuayed otherwise vnto their eares . And such occasions often offer themselues , whereof these kinde of men may make very good vse , by aduising , counselling , and reuealing graue and weighty matters , vnder the colour of foolery , which wiser men dare not aduenture to vtter in earnest .

There are some witty discreet Iesters , which speake Sentences , and are able so soundly to deliuer their opinions , that their Masters will not stoope to aske aduice of any of his other seruants , although it might much concerne them , and were great Statists , and very well able to giue counsell . Nor Why Princes refuse the aduice of their Counsellors . indeed will they consent , that they of all other , should giue them counsell , that they may not to their inferiours confesse their ignorance , or to seeme to vnderstand lesse then they . For euen in this , they would faine shew themselues to be Gods .

And such kinde of seruants as these , are those Parrats , which Iupiter desired to haue shut vp in a Cage ; Nor is this mischiefe of a day old , or was borne but yesterday , that great Persons should scorne and contemne the counsailes of wise , vnderstanding , and well qualified men . So great in these men is their pride , and ambition , that they seeke to aggregate and draw all things vnto themselues , making themselues Masters and absolute Lords , both of our spirituall , and temporall ; good , and bad , without controulement . Insomuch that they thinke with themselues , that by their onely breath , they giue grace vnto others , and not doing them any good in the world , they looke to be praised and extolled , as if they were the onely men , of whom they did hold their life , their honour , their wealth , and also their vnderstanding , which is the vtmost blasphemie , where-vnto in this case their folly can reach .

There is also another great inconuenience , which is this ; That as in a chappell of Miracles , wee must ha●…g vp ▪ to sooth their vanitie , the spoiles , and Trophees of our miseries . For if wee recouer our lamenesse , and bee once able to goe , we must offer vp our Crutches vnto them , whereof wee made vse , when we were be-nummed , and oppressed with pouertie .

If we escape any dangerous sicknesse , or mischance , we must sacrifice vnto them that winding sheete , which fortune had cut out for vs , burne Tapers , and set vp Images of Waxe , declaring to the world , that this miracle was wrought by them , and must hang vp those chaines in the Temple , wherewith we came forth from out the captiuitie of our miseries , and were now brought home , and landed in a safe Hauen .

But this were not altogether so much to be blamed , if these things did onely occurre vpon vertuous occasions , and that they had truely done these men good .

For there is a kinde of thankefulnesse , due to euery good turne that is done A good 〈◊〉 requires thankefulnesse . vs . And then we make it knowne that we haue receiued a benefit , when rendring thankes vnto God , we doe likewise publish the vertues of those men , that did doe these good deeds : because with an ardent zeale , and seruent affection , they did vse their best industry , imployed their persons , spent their friends , tooke hold of all occasions , let slip no time , and therein wasted and consumed their money . So that things being thus fairely carried , those that are benefited by them , shall worthily deserue much blame and reprehension , if they shall not render them all fitting and conuenient thankes . But they fall as short of these good things , as they doe excell in all filthy and beastly vices ; wherein they striue to exceede , and be counted the onely men : A short Tale of a Nobleman ; that was much giuen to Lying .

As was to be seene in a certaine Noble-man , that was exceedingly giuen to Lying , and lash out so vnreasonably in that kinde , as no man could outstrip him , who one day talking in conuersation with diuers other Gentlemen of qualitie , told them that hee had killed a Stagge , bearing so many branches or antlets on his head , that it did plainely appeare to bee a Lye , though hee carried it very handsomely . They all admired it , they said ; ( but not gaine-said it ) that it was one of the strangest things , that euer was seene , or heard of .

This lik't the Noble-man well ; But whilest he and the rest were thus wondring at it ; Why ( quoth an ancient Gentleman , a neere kinsman of his ) that was there then in company , ( after a pretty kinde of fashion bringing it forth ; ) doth your Lordship and these Gentlemen make such a wonder at this ? This is nothing , my Lord ; For , within these few dayes I my selfe did kill one in the same Forrest , that had two more then this that you talke of .

When hee heard him say so , the Noble-man blest himselfe , saying ; It is not possible : and looking angerly vpon him , ( scorning as it should seeme to be out-lyde ) said vnto him ; Sir , speake no more of this , tell it no farther , for it is such a thing , as was neuer yet seene , nor will I for my part euer beleeue it , though I hold it a courtesie so to doe .

The Gentleman , with a sterne countenance , and vndaunted courage , ( his Age and Alliance heartening him on ) in a discomposed kinde of voice , boldly brake forth , and told him ; Zwounds ( my Lord ) me thinkes your Lordship should content your selfe , that you haue a a The Spanish word is , Sesenta quentos . Now vn quento , is diez vezez cien mil. But that is not likely , he had so much : and therefore we set it 60000. Couar●…uuias verb. Contar. sixty thousand crownes a yeere comming in more then I , without seeking to out-strip me in Lying , as you doe in Liuing . Let me ( I pray ) though I am a poore man ) lye as I list : I begge nothing of you , nor any man else ; nor doe I rob any man either of his wealth , or his honour .

There are likewise a certaine kinde of witty-conceited fellowes , that are naturally simple and ignorant ; from whose mouth , oftentimes , drop mysticall sayings , and worthy the consideration , which God ( it seemes ) permits them to bolt forth now and then , making them also to keepe in such things as are fit to be silenced : who ( though simple as they seeme ) haue an extraordinarie grace in the deliuering of them . Which happinesse lighted vpon one , that was a simple ignorant fellow from his cradle ; in whom , one of the greatest Princes in Christendome tooke much pleasure , who for some secret An answere of a sample Foole , to a great Prince . causes , best knowne to himselfe , had discarded one of his grauest , and chiefest Ministers ; And this simple fellow , comming one day into his presence , ( which was shortly after the other was dismist the Court ) hee was no sooner entred in , but the King askt him : What newes in Court ? Hee told him , That his Maiestie had done very ill , in putting N. D. away : And that it was without any reason , or iustice in the world .

The King imagined , ( that cause hauing beene iustified by many other of his Ministers ) that this had proceeded simply out of his owne mouth , and told him , Thou speakest thus for him , because perhaps he was thy friend , not that thou hast heard any man else say so besides .

The Foole replyd . My friend ? In faith thou lyest . Thou art more my friend then he : I say nothing , but what all men say . The King was offended , that any should dare to question his actions , or to examine his brest . And being desirous to know , if any man of worth had presumed so farre to trench vpon what he had done . He replyde and said ; Since thou professest that so many haue said it , and that thou art my friend , name one of those vnto me , of whom thou hast heard this complaint .

The Foole paus'd vpon the matter . And when the King thought that hee had beene calling to memory , whom he should name vnto him , hee angerly made answer ; The blessed Trinitie told it me . Now see which of these three persons thou darest apprehend and punish . The King thereupon thought that it was a businesse of heauen , and so forbore to speake any more of it .

There are another kinde of pleasant Companions , which are good for nothing else but to dance , to play vpon Instruments , to sing , to murmure , to blaspheme , to swagger , to lye , and to deuoure victuals , good drinkers , a a Buenos beuedores , y malos viuidores . The vanitie of some great Men in rewarding Fooles and Iesters and bad liuers . And of these , some are only good at one of these qualities ; other some at all . Wherein some great ones take such delight , that they shall haue what they will of them , doing them many extraordinary graces and fauours , which is a most grieuous sinne .

To these , ( and only for these Iigges ) they giue Iewels of great value , rich suits of cloathes , and hand-fuls of gold ; which is more then they will doe for a wise , vertuous , and honest seruant , which shall treate with them of the ordering of their Estates and Persons , illustrating their names , and honouring their house with glorious Titles . But rather when it so falleth out ▪ that these come vnto them about matters of importance , and which neerely concerne them , they reiect them , and will not be aduised by them .

Your Presidents , Gouernours , Counsellors , and euery other Officer Why Counsellors of State speake not their mindes truly to their Masters . in Court , or that haue ought to doe in the Palace , being greedy of honour , and blinded with passion , if they bee called to speake their opinion , they often say that in publike , which their owne priuate opinion approues not , though it be neuer so good ; because they conceiue that in so doing , they shall conforme theirs , to that of their Lord and Master , and so mannerly seeme to runne along in the pleasing of his humour ; As also , for that it would grieue them to the very heart , that another should get the start of them , in gaining their Princes grace and fauour from them . So that many are not admitted Plaine speaking speedes not alwaies best . thereunto , for that they had not this trumpe in their hand , and would not play the like tricks , these getting more by their foule , then they by their faire play . By reason whereof , many things remaine without remedie and redresse ; and great businesses often-times ouerthrowne .

And if consultation shall be had of such things , whereof great profit may redound to themselues or to the State , they will tell the Author thereof coldly and dryly , because they will neither thanke him , nor reward him ; Wee Good labours ill requi●…ed . knew this before ; but there are a thousand inconueniences in it .

But cursed be those Counsellours , who because they were not the first in deliuering that sound opinion in such a businesse , blame the Author thereof , and carried away with the winde of their vanitie , and greedinesse of gaine , send him away empty : but vsing them first as Apothecaries doe their Simples ; who first distill or pund them in a Morter , and when they haue squeez'd all the iuyce , and wrung the substance out of them , throw out the cake on the dung-hill . They will first informe themselues thorowly of the busines , the best that they can ; and when they finde they are well and fully informed , they take it to themselues , casting from them the true Author thereof ; and that good counsell of his , they sell for their owne ; and this they doe cu●… priuilegio .

Some there are , that are like vnto those glasses or other vessels , that haue Shallow 〈◊〉 neither good for them●…es nor others . great bellies and little mouthes , they vnderstand things amisse , and fill their stomacke with all that they heare , and whatsoeuer is said vnto them : But although mentell , and powre into them neuer so much , and though they be as full as they can hold ; yet because they know not how to conceiue things well , they cause others to apprehend as little . And for this reason their businesses miscarry , and take not so happily as they should ; for they can not be so well informed of that they treated vpon , as those that were the proper Authors thereof , and had beaten their braines about it many dayes and nights , breaking their sleepes , and losing many a meale , for the better examining of all the contrary obiections , and for the aduancing of their pretended profitable ends . Much good may it doe them , let them goe beyond me this way and spare not ; for I would be loth in the end to rent such kinde of gettings , or to farme them out of their hands .

My Master tooke pleasure in hearing me , and liked me for something else For what seruices the Embassadour made much of Guzman . too besides my talke . For like a good Gardiner , he did gather those flowers together , which seemed fittest vnto him for the making vp of his Nose-gay , picking out the best and the choysest for his particular vse , and the rest ( which were but as it were the riffe-raffe and refuse flowers , ) he reserued only for entertainment .

He treated with me of that in priuate , which others did not stick to speake in publike . And these his secrets he did not only communicate to me alone ; The Embassadours noble disposition . but when he desired to know any thing , and to attaine to the true vnderstanding of businesses , that he might not erre , he would consult with men of wit , and those that had the best abilities , he would make very much of them , fauour and honour them ; and if they were poore and needy , he would supply their wants as well as he could , and more particularly in those things whereof he knew they stood most in need . And this he fastned vpon them in that wise and discreet manner , that it should not seeme to be bestowed vpon them by the way of Almes , leauing them thereby well contented , fully satisfied , and aboue all , exceeding thankfull : It was his fashion , to haue two or three of these vsually at his table , where were propounded graue politicke questions , and businesses of State ; and especially touching those things , which did presse and import him most , and neerest concerned his owne particular ends . By this meanes , without opening and discouering of himselfe , hee receiued their opinions , and reaped the chiefest fruits that their wits could afford him .

The like course he tooke with the Officers in Court , particular Gentlemen , and some Citizens of the best esteeme in Rome ; with whom he holding His course to come to know what 〈◊〉 done 〈◊〉 , and in Court . friendship , came to know the wrongs they receiued , the remedies to be applyed , and how and which way they stood affected . And then afterwards hauing a good iudgement of his owne , he did so dispose of things , as might make most for his aduantage , and the King his Masters seruice ; so that hee did seldome erre or faile in those things that he vndertooke . Hee was very discreet , of a settled and well composed behauiour , vertuous , courteous , well studied , and a great louer of those that had in them such commendable parts of learning as were worthy the recommendation . Hee was indued with all those good qualities , which were to be required in a person of his place and imployment ; he was like a goodly roome , furnished with all those rich ornaments which might set it forth , and make it appeare faire and beautifull in the eyes of the beholders , but in the midst thereof , euen in the very best part of all the roome , there was a The Spanish Refran . Estaua sembrado y nacido vn pero . He had one ill qualitie , which did drowne all the rest . I take that to be 〈◊〉 sense , though I haue not elsewhere met with the 〈◊〉 of this 〈◊〉 of 〈◊〉 . choake-Peare sowen and growne ●…p , which did much blemish it .

This Apple was our generall ruine ; this Peare the perdition of euery particular . Hee was an Enamorado ; one that was ouer head and eares in loue . F●…●…ere is no 〈◊〉 so found , that hath not some corruption ; nor no body so free , that hath not some one infirmitie or other . And his was , that he did but loue too well ; yea , euen to excesse . But in a matter of this nature , let euery man iudge , as shall seeme best to his owne liking . Howbeit , many wise men haue said , that a man can not bee absolutely perfect , vnlesse he haue once in his life-time beene in loue .

And of this opinion , it seemeth , was that pleasant-conceited Countrie fellow , that was the common Cryer in his Parish , who hauing often cry'd an A ta●… of a Cryer . Asse , that another Countrie fellow had lost , and could by no meanes heare any newes of him , ( for it should seeme some Gypsies had stolne him , who that he might not be knowne againe , had put new markes and colours vpon him ) did earnestly intreat him , that he would doe him the kindenesse to cry him once more vpon the Sunday following , after high Masse was ended ; and if he should chance to heare any tydings of his Asse , he would for his labour giue him a little young fat Pig that he had at home .

The knaue Cryer greedy of the Pig , did as he had requested him . And all the people being met together in the Market place , hee stood in the midst thereof , and cry'd out with a loud voyce ; To all manner of people , that are dwellers in this Towne , or borderers thereabout , be it knowne , that if there be any man or woman , that hath neuer yet beene in loue , let them come in , and tell their name , and they shall haue a fine young Pig for their labour . And God saue the King .

There was placed right against the same , leaning himselfe against the Wall of the Councell house , a lubberly-Lad of some two and twenty yeeres of age , with long shagge hayre , a russet Cassocke on his backe , welted with the same doth , open about the shoulders , and close before , Breeches of white cottond Bayes , gathered and playted beneath at the knees , a Shirt with a band thereunto , so hard quilted throughout the stocke , that a Turkish bow with a very sharpe Arrow , was not able to pierce it , a poore thred-bare Cloake , a payre of high shooes of Neats-leather , knit together with two strings of twisted Hempe , and bare-legged , who comming in all haste to the Cryer in his Clownish kinde of language , said vnto him ; Brother Sanz , giue mee the Pig : for by these ten bones I vow vnto you , that I was neuer yet in loue , neuer had my head puzled with it , nor euer payd any Tole to that Mill.

Then the Cryer calling the Owner of the beast in all haste , and pointing to this Chop-loch with his finger , said vnto him , Anton Berrocal , giue me my Pig , and take you here your Asse .

But that this may be proued , & that truly by some President of these present times wherein we liue : There was in Salamanca a principall Doctor of the Another tale of a Doctor of Salamanca . Chayre , one of the famousest and grauest Aduocates in all that Vniuersitie ; that often visited ( for his entertainment ) a certaine Gentlewoman , that had profest her selfe a Nunne , very faire she was , well descended , and wonderfull discreet . And he being inforced to absent himselfe from thence for some few dayes , he went his way without taking his leaue of her , thinking that he had now attained to the perfection of his loue , and that there was no need of these finenesses , and niceties betweene them .

Afterwards , when he was returned from his iourney , hee went ( as he was wont ) to visit her . But when hee saw , that she would not admit of his Visit , hee became very pensiue and sad there-vpon ; because hee could not imagine what should bee the cause of this sudden strangenesse , hauing alwayes heretofore shew'd her selfe very kinde and louing vnto him . But when hee came ( by some diligences , that he had vsed ) to know the reason of it , he was wonderfull well contented therewith , it seeming vnto him , that this in some sort was rather a kinde of grace and fauour of hers , the●… otherwise .

Well , he sent vnto her to excuse himselfe , earnestly intreating her , that he might bee so much beholding vnto her , as to see her , vsing therein the mean●… of such Ladies and Gentlewomen as were friends to them both .

At last ( through much importunitie ) fore against her will , she came forth to receiue his Visit , but with that anger and disdaine , that she could not containe her selfe , but must needs shew it : for the very first words that she let fly at him , were these :

Base , and ill-nurtur'd as thou art ; for such base thoughts , argue no lesse then basenesse of bloud ; which is confirmed by thy vngentlemanly proceeding ; whereof , to thy shame thou hast made too open show . For hauing thy being , as it were from me , and for my sake , and hauing come thereby vnto that height , wherein now thou art , forgetting all the good I haue done thee , and all the charge that I haue beene at to qualifie thee , and put thee forward in the world , thou hast lost all that due respect and thankefulnesse , which I deserued at thy hands ; but since the fault was mine in raising thee , it is no maruell , that mine should be the punishment .

To these she added many other more sharpe and bitter words : so that the poore Gentleman being dasht quite out of countenance , because many were there present when she vs'd him thus coursely , and gaue him such a sound rattling ; incensed with the excesse of this her rigour , he made her this short and cutted reply :

Gentlewoman , touching this complaint of yours , be it with , or without any iust cause , I will not stand to dispute it ; And for your accusing of my vn-mannerly proceeding , let that likewise passe ; For , Cada vno , siente como ama . Euery man best knowes , how , and how much he loues . And I acknowledge , that all this ariseth from the many and great fauours , that you haue been pleased to conferre vpon me .

But whereas you touch mee in my reputation , ( being forced there-vnto by you , ) it is fit and necessary that therein I should satisfie those that are heere present , I must be so bold with you as to tell you plainely ; That since God hath been pleased to raise me to that I am , I come not thereto either by corruption , or fauour , but by mine owne great paines , and continuall studies , haue I procured my preferment . She then interrupting him , and not suffering him to goe on , returned him , but with a great deale of choller , this quicke answere :

Thou lyest like a Villaine . Thou rise by thy learning ? Thou had'st not come to that great knowledge that thou hast , nor hadst euer had so much wit , as to learne to mend so much as an old shoo , if I had not put spirit into thee , quickned thy wit , and perfected thy vnderstanding , by giuing thee leaue to make loue vnto me . This whetstone put an edge vpon thy dull sconce ; and but for this , thou might'st haue sunke , and neuer beene able to lift vp thy head .

By this then wee may see , how much it may import a man to loue ; and Touching 〈◊〉 . that it is not so great a fault as some would make it . Mistake mee not ; I meane , when the ends are good , and honest .

But in my Master it was taken in the worfer part ; for his ends did exceed and passe their bounds ; and the blame of all that ill was laid vpon me ; euery man conceiuing , that I was the cause thereof : Complaining , that since I came to serue him , I had opened his scull , and put into his head nothing but Hawkes-bels and Rattles : All that he tooke delight in , were merry tales , idle iests , and the like vanities : which till then , he had neuer formerly been giuen vnto .

It might very well be , that with my heate I might cause some buds or little sprigs to sprout forth . But for to speake the truth ( seeing the Parties are not heere to be examined , and I am the man whom they thus accuse ) I assure you , that others had the handling of him before , that wrought him this harme .

For when I entred into his seruice , and that hee ca●…e to put his cure into my hands , the Physicians despayred of his recouerie , and had giuen him quite ouer , and would haue no more to doe with him ; I will not deny , but that I might minister much thereof vnto him ; for by reason I was in such fauour with him , I had likewise the freedome to vse many odde foolish iests , and preiudiciall liberties of speech .

I was familiarly acquainted with all Rome , I had as free accesse into euery house , as into our owne ; excusing my pretensions , that I onely repaired to Guzmans course of life in Rome . such and such places , to giue lessons to some to sing to the Gitterne , and teach other some to dance .

I did intertaine your young Wenches in good conuersation with merry and pleasant iests ; and your widdowes , with whispering tales in their eares ; and entring into a league of friendship with your married men , I got likewise the good will of their Wiues , to whom they would bring mee to laugh and make sport , wherewith they were well pleased , for the good contentment they tooke in my harmelesse mirth .

And all this I did , to the end , that from this good ground , my Master might take occasion to declare and open himselfe more freely to me . For I relating vnto him , what , and how things passed abroad , it was an easie matter for me to kindle with the breath of my words , the fire that was in his heart , by blowing first away the ashes from off those coales , that were already throughly tinded , aliue , and very quicke within him . He was in a good disposition there-vnto , and therefore any the least occasion would serue the turne . He was a kinde of house made all of thatch , so that a little sparke was inough to raise a great flame , hauing such combustible stuffe to worke vpon , being still affectioned to that , which himselfe had most minde to , without hauing respect to that discreet carriage , which he formerly obserued in all his actions .

I doe ingeniously confesse , that I was an instrument of his excesses and flyings out , and that in regard of my being seene to walke here and there Guzman an i●… instrument to his Masters desires . to and fro , to enter into this house , and to come out of that , many houses , and women of good qualitie , were spotted and branded with infamy .

But let vs heere leaue my Master as a man , to whom albeit these things did cause him to be noted , and to haue his good name called in question , yet was not he so much to be blamed , as those who did know well inough , what manner of fellow I was .

I would many times demand of them , what honour or profit I did reape , by being interessed in these businesses ? Why should Widdowes take delight in hearing of tales , and pleasant iests ? Why Parents bring such straggling wanderers home to their Daughters ? Or why Husbands make their Wiues merry with such dangerous intertainments ? What other good can be expected from your neat Pages ( such as I then was ) who doe scarce touch the ground that they tread on ? What doe your Princes witty Iesters , and your Pages & Dwar●… of 〈◊〉 vse . Great mens Dwarfes serue for , but to talke with Ladies and Gentle-women , and to indeare vnto them their Masters loue ? who againe inquire of them , what good tables they keepe , how gallantly they liue , how much they spend , what in Amber , and other odours and sweet perfumes , what in the pompe of apparell , and what in Musicke that they dayly bestow vpon their friends and Mistresses ?

Why doe they talke and giue eare to such things , whereby they afterwards giue occasion to others to open their mouthes , and to vtter with their to●…gues all that they either know or imagine ? Doe not they perceiue , that i●… so doing , they build but their owne prison , and weaue that winding sheete , wherein their good names must be winded and b●…yed ? What b●…fit can the content they take in hearkening to merry 〈◊〉 bring them ? which 〈◊〉 to no other end in the world , but to giue way vnto them , that they may report to their Masters , what they take most pleasure in , besides the questioning of their good name amongst their neighbours ? Let these a Gods name make themselues merry with the reward of their errours ; and if they be louers of iests , it is no maruell if they bee iested withall . They desire a life to haue musicke play at their windowes , whilest others in the meane while are making Ballads of them , to sing forth their shame at euery mans doore .

A Widdow , that respects her honour , and will haue a care of her credit , A lesson to Widdowes . must keepe her doore shut , her daughter chamber'd vp , her casement close , and aboue all , not suffering her to haue her owne will , and to doe what she list ; that shee be visited but seldome , but be alwayes occupied ; for , of idlenesse , ( a ) growes wantonnesse . And it stands with good reason , Que la madre Prouerb . Del oçio naçe el negocio . holgazana , saque hija cortesana : That a light mother , should breed a loose daughter . And if she loue to haue her traine plaid withall , that her daughter will proue a Wagge-tayle . And if she hap to be married , she will turne ill huswife , because she hath beene ill taught .

By this you may see , what obligations the Parents haue to looke well vnto their Children : Let them take away all occasions of scandall ; Let them A lesson to Parents . weigh with themselues , what ( vpon the like occasions ) they murmure and whisper of others . And then let them consider , how much better it were , that their Wiues , Sisters , and Daughters , should rather learne to handle their Needle , then to play on the Ghitterne ; to gouerne well , rather then to dance well : For hence it commeth to passe , that many women , not knowing how to looke so well as they should , into the corners of their owne houses , busie themselues , in working strange alterations in those of others .

Speake I truth , or no ? I know , ye will tell me that I doe . For such truthes as these are not to be treated , or mentioned , but vpon necessitie , and vrgent occasion .

I confesse it to be so , and for my part , I approue it . But because that which I haue said , toucheth none of those that heare me ; it is therefore well said , to the end that when it shall be needfull , and men see their time , they may be the better able to giue good counsell vnto others , when they see them step out of the way , and goe awry .

Maloes lo malo , que nunca puede ser bueno . Ill is that ill , that neuer can be Prouerb . good . It was not good , I confesse , that I should bee a Bawd to my Master , But euery man would faine liue . And this Office I performed by those tricks Guzman , his Masters Bawd . and deuices I told you of before , taking occasion by my familiar and generall acquaintance in Rome , to goe as boldly into euery mans house , as I would into mine owne , excusing this libertie of mine , by those pretensions I made , of teaching some to play vpon Instruments , and some to dance ; intertaining in the meane while Maidens with merriments ; Widdowes , with old wiues tales , and what was whispered abroad ; and entring into amitie with married men , good honest kinde Cuckolds .

But I was in some sort to be excused , ( if not borne withall ) for that my wants and necessitie draue me to doe as I did , and opened that doore vnto me , whereat I might get forth to seeke my liuing .

But what excuse can they haue , who for the light toyes of this world , will venture the losse of their reputation vpon earth , and those rich treasures that are laid vp in heauen for those that liue well ? which two things euery man ought most to esteeme , and haue euer before his eyes . But what I did herein , was to wedge my Masters affection vnto me , and to worke my selfe into his fauour , both which I came to be possest of ; and not with intent and purpose to reclaime him from this his weaknesse , and to perswade him vnto better courses , but rather to spurre him on in this wretched race that he ran .

But he that would trust me in such like businesses as these , and communicate himselfe vnto me in this kinde , what could he looke or expect from me ? I know there are many men , who thinke it is a great credit vnto them , that they doe nobly , and get a great deale of reputation and esteeme , by these their visits , their ingresses and their egresses , when indeed , it is quite contrary .

For your women that entertaine chat with your crack-rope Pages , with your giddy-headed Poets , that neuer goe without a muske a a The Spanish word is , Alco●…ça ●…i . vna costa de açucar refinado con mezcia de poluos cordiales . Alcorcillas , we call Pastillas de boca . Vid. Couarruuias . Verbo Alcorça . Comfit in their mouth , or chewing the rinde of a Lemmon , with your flat-Capt Citizens , your countrie Lads , and the like ; some perhaps may hold them discreet ; but I am sure they lose the name of chaste , which as an inestimable Iewell they ought highly to esteeme , being for their labour euer after accounted fooles .

Now the profit that I made by this my occupation , trading with this person , and with that , with t'other and t'other , this my conuersation being so generall , it was the only meanes , that kept me from being discouered to be a Bawd .

But ( to say the truth ) they might very well haue put the implumed Hat vpon my head , which I haue seene worne by many others in my dayes , who did lesse deserue it then my selfe , in token they were Loue 's Embassadours , whom he imployed in his chiefest and most secret affaires .

Here , in me , may you see how misfortunes fall to men by inheritance . Hither to it hath beene deliuered without any disguise or masking , how I led my Master along , neuer suffring him to take any rest or quiet ; and how hee made me another Adonis , in the neatnesse and gallantry of my cloathes , and delicacie of Perfumes , for the great care and diligences that I vsed in these and the like businesses .

But true and certaine it is , that murmurings and whisperings attend such False murmuration bites , true kills . Prouerb . Actions . And if a good man be now and then bitten , what wonder is it , that a bad man should be bruised and crusht therewith to pieces ? Y que aya sospechas ; donde no faltan hechas ; And that there may well bee suspition , where deeds make confession .

It were a great deale of simplicitie and ignorance in me , and other such as I am , for to seeke after any better name , or to goe about to make ( as they say ) a stone Wall of b b Prouerb . Tapiar , a piedra lodo . mudde ; thinking to stop mens mouthes , and to hinder their ill imaginations and bad conceits of vs , when as we our selues giue them such euident occasions to conceiue amisse of vs .

None can impose , or set any sessing or ratable fine vpon mens censures and Mens censures not to be auoyded . opinions ; for that were , Poner puertas al campo ; to set vp gates to shut in such a vast circuit , as is Salisburie-Plaine .

Thou canst no more limit a mans thoughts , then thou canst number the sands of the Sea . It is not I that can make them to thinke , or not thinke as I would haue them ; I cannot be master of their thoughts ; nor will it boote any one man to deny that which all men affirme . It will be but trouble without profit , a needlesse and endlesse piece of worke ; wherein we shall shew our selues as foolish as he was , who went about to locke vp the smoake , to make doores to shut it in , and to keepe it close prisoner .

But what shall we now say of our foolish Masters , who perswade themselues , that this their businesse passeth secretly and safely thorow our hands ? Shall I deale truly with you ? I will . Take it then from me , and I know it to be true , Que no ay çiençia , que corrija vn ena●…rade . There is no scourge of Prouerb . wit or learning , that will lash a wanton Louer out of his lust .

For matters of Loue , there are no Bartuli , no Aristotles , no Galens ; their counsels faile them ; their wisdomes are too weake ; and their Medicines can Lo●…e hardly remoued . doe no good vpon them . Nor there is not any thing , that doth more publish and manifest this truth , then mens solicitude and care in these things , from the which none ( that are taken therewith ) can containe themselues . For with two Visits of ours , and one intercourse of theirs , or but a passing by their doore , make the little children ( those shrill trumpets of truth ) to sound forth their lightnesse aloud thorow the streets .

The greatest punishment that lighted then vpon me was ; that my hayres began to sprout , and my Chinne to put on a beard , the which the more I shau'd , because I would not haue it perceiu'd , the thicker it came , & grew the faster . And for that it is a peculiar Office belonging to handsome and witty Pages , to be Uenus and Cupids chiefest Ministers , the more diligence I vsed in tricking , adorning , trimming , and setting my selfe forth in lafciuious manner , the more occasion I gaue the world thereby to talke and iudge of me accordingly . I studied to be neat and handsome in my cloathes , but tooke no heed how foule the fashion of my behauiour was ; and therefore it was no maruell if they threw durt vpon me with their tongues . In a word , either actiuely or passiuely , euery one would bestow vpon mee El nombre de las pasquas , and Prouerb . force me to weare their Liuery , you know what I meane ; And though I told them they lyed like a company of Rogues and Villaines as they were , they would laugh , and hold their peace , giuing by this their mysticall kinde of silence , a more open way vnto the truth . Their taunts against me were true , and strooke deepe , but whatsoeuer I reply'd vpon them , they made but a iest of it ; my words were but as the pecking of strawes , theirs as the piercing of Dartes .

There are a kinde of considerate and discreet men , which take the sayings of men , not as the words sound in themselues , but as they are , from whom they come ; regarding more the speaker , then the thing spoken . And this is a great point of wisdome .

Againe on the contrary , there are some ( I know not whether I may be so bold to call them fooles or no ) who from some dis-fauour of their Mistresses , A c●…g tricke to defame in this manner . forme an iniury , and as if it either were , or might be so , they will be reuenged of them ; and laying some imputation vpon their honour , seeke to scandall and defame them , without any reason or cause in the world . I was not able to stand against so many , nor could my Sword cut out his way thorow such a multitude that set vpon me : I saw they had reason on their side , and therefore I was willing to bee-●…ush , and to pocket vp these wrongs with patience .

And albeit it be an Act of true humilitie , patiently to suffer reproach ; yet in me it was cowardize , and deie●…tion of the minde . For that I held my peace and said nothing , there was good cause why ; because I knew all the speaking in the world could not helpe it . It might well haue made matters worse , but neuer a whit the better . And seeing that I had not one sparke of shame in mine owne house , I would not for shame goe seeke it else-where ; the fire of my zeale to good was quite out , there was no recouering of it . And therefore ( making a vertue of necessitie ) I was forced to passe ouer all these bobs and ierkes they had at me , some-times with a smile , some-times a iest , and some-times with both .

In conclusion , howbeit I ought rather to haue indured any the greatest hurt that could come vnto me , then submit my selfe euen in the least degree Prouerb . to base gaine ; yet notwithstanding , I had , like the Melon , a a Tenia como el melon la cam●… hecha . my bed made for me . I saw I could not well be worse thought of then I was already , and therefore casting aside all thought of amendment , I counted it a credit vnto me , and tooke rather a pride in it then otherwise , and so making light of it , and iesting it out , I did set a good face on the matter , when they said any thing to me , that I might not seeme to be dasht out of countenance , or bound to giue them an answer , which would but haue made them to vexe me the more , and done my selfe no good . So that by this they persecuted me the lesse , and I past the more quietly along by them . To passe things by with patients .

And why should I take ( seeing this did serue my turne , and that I past well enough with it ) any other course with them ? Which in these dangerous cases , if I should haue attempted any other way to pacifie them , I should neuer haue beene able to doe it ; and should thereby haue but made the fire more to flame , by seeking to asswage it with Flaxe and Rozin .

Let him therefore , whosoeuer will take vpon him to set open a shop to Vice , prouide himselfe of a Tortoyse shell , arme his backe with patience , and keepe his eares , and his mouth shut . And let not any man flatter himselfe , that hauing foule conditions , he shall get him a faire report . For , El nombre , sigue al hombre ; As is the man , so is his good name . And as euery one deserues , so shall he be esteemed .

CHAP. III.

Guzman de Alfarache recounteth that which hapned vnto him with a Captaine and a Doctor at a banquet , which the Embassadour his Lord made .

THere is so thinne a Pale put betwixt Deceiuing and Lying ; and are so neere kinne the one to the other , that I Of deceiuing and lying . know not who can tell , or is able to distinguish and difference the one from the other : for though they are different in name , they are one in identitie , and of the same paritie in effect , and in essence alike . For there is no Lye without Deceit , nor no Deceit without a Lye .

He that will lye , doth deceiue ; and he that will deceiue ; doth lye . But because they are commonly receiued after a different manner , and for different purposes , I will take them as they stand in vse , and accordingly discourse thereof .

Deceit then , in respect of Truth , is as Truth , in regard of a Lye : or as the shadow of a Glasse , and that naturall forme which it representeth . It is as aptly disposed , and is made as facill to effect whatsoeuer great hurt , as it is l●…rd and difficult to be found out at the first ; for that it is so like vnto good ; that representing the very selfe-same figure , fashion , motion , and proportion , it doth the easier destroy it . It is a most subtill net , wrought of the slendrest and smallest threds , in comparison and likenesse whereof was framed that other , which the Poets feigne , was made by Uulcane , when hee caught him that cuckol'd him .

It is so imperceptible , and so fine , and thinne ; that there is not any sight so cleere , any iudgement so subtill , nor any discretion of that discerning , nor any wit of that nimble apprehension , that is able to discouer it , nay , scarce to perceiue it .

It is so artificially wrought , that though it bee spred out abroad , and laid forth as plaine as may be to our view , yet are wee not able to escape it , in regard wee walke on securely , not so much as once dreaming of any fraud or deceit . And by this meanes it is so strong , that few or none doe breake it , without leauing some signe of the harme that they haue taken . And for this cause , it is iustly called Maximum vitae damnum ; the greatest hurt that can happen vnto vs in this life . For vnder a tongue of Waxe , it carries a heart of Diamond ; it cloathes it selfe with Hayre-cloth , though it neuer come neere the skinne ; it keepes a chupping and sucking in of the cheekes , for to make it seeme leane and meager , when its belly is ready to cracke with good cheere . And hauing store of health to sell to others , it speakes pulingly , and pittifully ; and onely that it may seeme to bee sicke , it puts on a sorrowfull countenance , powres out its teares , offers vs its bosome , Of all mischiefes , decei●… is the greatest . and with open armes , runnes to receiue vs , but as Ioab did Amaza ; imbrace , to kill .

And as Birds giue the Empire to the Eagle ; Beasts , to the Lyon ; Fishes , to the Whale ; and Serpents , to the Basiliske ; so amongst all other mischiefes , there is none greater or more powerfull , then that of Deceit . As an Aspe , it kils vs sleeping ; it is that Syrens voice , whose delight ( like a Butchers Curre ) first seazeth on the eare , and next , on the throat ; it s rauishing , is murthering ; it offers a faire assurance of peace , and with a great deale of smoothnesse , professeth friendship ; but neglecting all humane and diuine Lawes , breakes them at her pleasure , leauing vs with as much wrong , as scorne .

She promiseth cheerefull contentments , and certaine hopes , which she neuer performeth , nor doe they euer come to passe , because she goes chopping and changing them from Fayre to Fayre , to make her owne market . And as a house is built of many stones ; so one deceit is an addition of many other ; and all of them serue for one and the same end . It is the Headsman of all goodnesse , for with a seeming kinde of sanctitie , it makes euery man secure , and there is none that are either aware of it , or feare it . It comes vnto vs in the habit of a Hermit , the better to execute its ill intents .

This contagious infirmitie is so generall , that not onely men , but Beasts and Birds doe likewise therein suffer with them . Also the Fishes in the Waters exercise deceits ; and this they doe , the better to preserue themselues . Trees and Plants doe deceiue , promising pleasant flowers and fruits , which fayle vs at their time , passing brauely away with it . Stones , though they bee but stones , and without sence , trouble our sence , with their counterfet splendour , and lye , in that they seeme to be that they are not . Time , occasions , and our sences deceiue vs ; and aboue all , our best and most considerate thoughts . In a word , all things deceiue , and we doe all deceiue , one of Foure manner of wayes of deceiuing . The first . these foure manner of wayes .

The one is , when one vseth a deceit , and goes cunningly away with it , leauing the other deceiued : As it hapned to a certaine Student of Alcala de Henares ; who , when the Feast of Easter was drawing neere , and A Tale of a Scholler of Alcala . hauing nothing where-with to make himselfe merry against that good Time , hee called to minde a neighbour of his , who had a Court or yard , with great store of Hens in it , with the which hee did himselfe no good at all .

Hee was a poore beggerly fellow ; and as hee was very poore , so was hee extreme couetous ; an erranter mizer was there not in all the Country . He fed them with the bread that was giuen him of Almes ; & a nights he shut them vp in the same lodging where helay .

This Student went plotting with himselfe , how hee might steale them away , but lighted vpon none that did yet like him . For in the day time it was impossible , and in the night they roosted in the same roome where hee himselfe lodg'd .

At last he bethought himselfe of feigning a packet of Letters , and to put there-vpon two Ducats a a In Spaine , they doe not pay for the carriage of their Letters before-band , but p●…t so much Port vnder the Superscription , to bee paid by him that 〈◊〉 it . Port , directing it to Madrid to a certaine principall Cauallero , and a Gentleman very well knowne : And before the breake of day , he very secretly laid it on the threshold before his doore , that as soone as hee opened it , hee might presently finde it . Hee got him vp in the morning , and as soone as he saw it , not knowing what it was , he tooke it vp .

This Student past that way in the meane while , as it were by chance . Whom this poore man espying , came vnto him , and intreated him to tell him what those papers were . The Student told him ; Marry such ( said hee ) as I would bee glad with all my heart I could light vpon the like .

These ( quoth hee ) are Letters directed to Madrid with two Ducats Port vpon them , to a rich Gentleman that resideth there , who shall no sooner receiue them , but will see you truely paid for your paines .

The poore man beganne to looke vp , and was so ouer-ioyed therewith , that the teares did trickle downe his cheekes . Hee thought with himselfe , that one dayes trauell was a thing of nothing ; especially being that he might performe this iourney by noone ; and though he went thither afoot , he might in the euening , without any trouble , returne home in some one Cart or other that was to goe for Alcala . Where-vpon , he went and fed his Poultry , shut them vp safe , leauing out such food as he thought sufficient for them , and so hies him away with his Letters .

The Student that night made a shift , by getting ouer some back-sides , and out-Courts , to get into that yard , where the poore mans house was , and heauing the doore off the hindges , hee gets mee in , taking nothing away thence but the Hens , leauing no more but one onely Cocke behinde , with a mourning-hood on his head , and a Mantle of blacke Bayes , so surely sowed on , that they could not fall off ; which done , hee with-drew himselfe homeward to his lodging .

When the poore man was come home to his house the next morning , and saw the mis-fortune that had befalne him at home , and that hee had bestow'd his labour in vaine ; for there was no such Gentleman to be found in all Madrid ; hee , and his Cocke did bitterly bewayle this their solitude and widdow-hood , making lamentable moane each vnto other : the good man with his mournefull words ; the poore Cocke , with his mourning weeds .

Another kinde of deceit is : When together with the deceiued , the Deceiuer The second . is also deceiued . As it hapned to this Student in this very case . For , he being not able to effect this businesse alone by himselfe , and that he must needs vse the helpe of some body else , hee tooke vnto him one of his Camrades , whom he acquainted with the businesse , promising if hee would assist him in this theft , he should share halfe with him .

This his Companion discouered it to a friend of his ; he , to a third ; so that the word past from one to another , till it came to the eares of certaine madde Waggs of Andaluzia ; And for they were old Castilians , ( and their Opposites for this cause ) they agreed together to strip them of their Hens , by another pretty deuice .

They knew the house from whence they were to come , and the streetes , through which they were to passe ; They fained themselues to be the Iustice , and they watcht till they should returne , at the turning of the street : whom they had no sooner espyed , but they issued out a a This is the fashion , and language of the Iustice in Spaine , when they walke the Round . vpon them in forme of a Circle , hedging them in on euery side , with Lanternes , Swords and Bucklers , hauing appointed the formost man to aske , Who goes there ? What are yee ? Stand. Vpon this , they verily thinking , that hee was one of the Iustices seruants , and beeing loth to bee either knowne or taken with that badde word of bidding them Stand , they threw downe their Hens , and beganne to take them to their heeles , as hard as they could driue . So that there were not some wanting , who did also coozen , and deceiue them .

The third kinde of deceit is ; When it is without preiudice . Neither deceiuing others , together with themselues ; nor decei●…ed , when they goe about The third . to deceiue . And this may be done two manner of wayes ; Either by Workes , orby Words . Words , by recounting Stories , telling of Tales and Fables , and other things of intertainment . Workes , as by iuggling , sleights of the hand , tricks on the Cards , and other the like deuices , which are done without any harme or preiudice to any .

The fourth kinde is ; When hee that thinkes to deceiue , is himselfe deceiued ; that tricke that he would put vpon another , being put vpon himselfe : The fourth . As it befell a great Prince of Italy , though some report the same of Caesar : Who , that he might grace one of the famousest Poets of his time , carried A pretty passage betwixt the Prince of Italy , and a Poet. him home to his house , where at first he vs'd him wonderfull kindely , made exceeding much of him , did him many fauours , and bestow'd many gifts on him , as long as his humour was pleased with those Poems that he presented vnto him .

But this lasted not long , the Princes affection falling off by a little and a little , till at last the poore Poet was faine to content himselfe with his bare lodging , and some short allowance . So that he suffered much want and necessitie ; and was growne so poore both in his purse , and his apparell , that hee durst not goe abroad for shame , because he had not where-withall to couer his nakednesse .

The Poet weighing and considering this his vnhappinesse ; and seeing himselfe shut vp as it were in a Cage , and that neither ( which is permitted vnto Parrats ) the Prince himselfe , nor any about him , would vouchsafe to heare him speake , hee resolued with himselfe to rowze vp the Princes long sleeping fauour , and waiting an opportunitie to doe it , vnderstanding such a time , that hee was to goe abroad , hee attended at a certaine place , which hee thought fittest for his purpose and when the Prince drew neere , hee made toward him , and kneeling on his knees , when hee came at him , hee presented him with a Poem that hee had made ; which the Prince receiuing , hee thought by this meanes to reuiue that remembrance of him , which had so long lien dead . Hee continued in these kinde of diligencies so long , that the Prince beeing wearied out with these his importunities , was determined to put some iest or other vpon him , to make him to desist from giuing him farther trouble in that kinde .

And hauing himselfe made a Sonnet , and going out to walke one Euening , when he saw the Poet was comming towards him , preuenting him in the presenting of his Poem , he drew the Sonnet out of his bosome , and clapt it in the Poets hand ; the Poet vnderstanding the tricke , as one that was discreet , feigning to haue read it , highly commending both the Verse , and the Inuention , put his hand in his pocket , and pluckt out a ( a ) Royall of eight which he had there , and gaue it to the Prince , telling him withall ; Such a good wit well deserues a reward . I giue you all that I haue , had I more , you should haue it .

With this the Prince was fast , being caught in the same snare , and paid A Royall of eight , i●… foure shillings English . with the same tricke that hee purposed to put vpon him . And from that time forward he fauoured him , as he had done before .

There are many other kindes of these deceits ; and one aboue the rest , which is a very dangerous one ; which is that of those , who would make vs to beleeue that for Gospell , when as our owne eyes and knowledge doe both see , and know the contrary . Many other dangerous deceits .

A fellow that is basely both bred and borne , and well enough knowne to be such a one , will seeke by his hawtie carriage and proud lookes , to gaine Proud fellowes . vnto himselfe the name of a great man , though ( God he knowes ) he is scarce worth foure Marauedis ; giuing ( by his ill proceeding ) occasions to others , to scoffe and laugh at him : And to say , what fellow is this ? What was his beginning ? Of what continuance his Auncestors ? Whence doth he fetch his Pedigree ? What did his Gentilitie or his Office cost him ? What trade was his Father of ? and of what occupation his Mother ? These men thinke to deceiue others , and they deceiue themselues . For not by this meanes ( that is to say , by pride ) but by humilitie , affabilitie , and faire behauiour , they goe by degrees , throwing in their earth , till they come in time to fill vp those ditches , and to be leuell and equall with the best .

Others seeke to deceiue with their fierce lookes , thinking thereby to be Swaggerers . counted valiant , as if wee did not know , that they are the only men , that dare not meddle with a Mouse ; or tread vpon a Worme , if hee should but offer to turne tayle .

Others with their too much prattle , and quoting of Authors , seeke Talking schollers . to bee held wise men , and learned Clearkes , not considering that many Stationers haue farre more in number , who notwithstanding in matter of knowledge are meerely ignorant men . For neither the long Gowne , nor the broad-brim'd Hat , nor the Mule , for all his graue Foot-cloth , shall bee sufficient to couer the disease they are sicke of , but at three or foure shakings of the Vrinall , wee shall discerne those raggs , and cloudie streakes that are in their Vrine , and then they will plainely bee discouered what they are .

I haue said of some , that they repute themselues wise and learned , because Stationers . they haue store of bookes , and that your Stationers haue many more then they ; but many of them are worse then these block-headed Doctors , who with a great deale of paines , and by tradition , vnderstand the Frontispices of bookes , and yet notwithstanding , being often therein deceiued , they fall headlong into the pit of ignorance ; now would I haue thee to tell mee which of these two doe deceiue most ? I shall tell it thee . They are both of one graine , sowne and reaped vnder one and the same Moone , bread of the same meale whereof most men doe eate , and is their onely nourishment .

But out of the number of these , doe I except Paulus and Aldus Ma●…tius ; Printers . Henricus , Robertus , and Carolus Stephanus ; Adrianus Turnebbius , Franciscus Sansouinus , and many others like vnto them , not only meere Stationers , and Printers , but learned and famous Schollers , and of great note in the world , whose workes and labours doe and shall euer render thereof a perpetuall testimonie . There haue beene diuers other worthy vnderstanding men in this their profession ; who in their life-time , haue published and brought to light many most noble and excellent Authors ; who , if they had not by them beene reuiued , had beene buryed for euer in the Church-yard of obliuion . Whereas now many of them by these mens great paines and industrie , are raysed from their graues to immortalitie .

Others are growne so foolish , ( and indeed are accounted no better ) who Old men . being now growne old , decrepit , and vnable for any kinde of vse or exercise , and this their weaknesse being notorious and well knowne to all the world , and this their rotten building ready to fall , yet are they willing to deceiue themselues , and euery body else ( if they could ) contrary to all truth and reason , by dying the haires of their heads and beards , as if any man were so ignorant , and did not know that there are none of these changeable coloured beards , but at euery motion of the Sunne , and euery cast of the eye they present a different colour , and neuer a one perfect , much like vnto those in the ●…cks of your Doues and Pigeons ; for in euery haire of these old Cox-combes , you shall meet with three diuers and sundry colours ; white at the root , yellow in the middle , and blacke at the point , like vnto one of your Parrats feathers .

When women doe the like , there is not any one haire of theirs , which hath not it's different colour . There was a certaine Gentlewoman in the Old women . world , that shall be namelesse , ( which of mine owne knowledge , I am able to affirme ) who did vse this dying and colouring of her hoary haires , which one day I did diligently marke and obserue ; and beleeue me ( for let me not liue if I lye vnto you ) some of them seemed greene vnto me , some blue , some yellow , some vermilion , and others of diuers other colours ; and in some one odde haire , all these colours did conioyne and meete together . So that seeking thus to deceiue Time , and to dissemble her Age , shee discouered her folly , and became a laughing stocke to as many as lookt vpon her .

That some young folkes should vse the like deceit , who by inheritance haue beene borne with gray haires , ( who like the fruits that grow in the Young folkes . fields of Placençia , grow ripe before their time ) it is no great maruell . Yet euen these too ( though better to be borne withall ) giue occasion of hauing that freely spoken of them , which they willingly would auoyd , whereby it comes to passe , that as they increase in yeeres , they decrease in credit .

O thou vnfortunate , miserable , and wretched old Age , thou sacred Temple ; Old age , a venerable thing . Old age necessary , yet not regarded . thou Sanctuarie of safety ; thou stop to the desperate carreeres of this life ; thou Inne of rest to our weary bones ; How is it that thou art so much abhorred in this life , being that thou art the Hauen , which all men desire to attaine vnto ? How is it that they , who respect thee a farre off , when they come neerer vnto thee , sticke not to prophane thee ? How is it , that thou being the vessell of Prudence , thou art derided as foolish ? How is it , that thou that art honour it selfe , respect and reuerence , art by those that are thy best friends reputed infamous ? How is it , that thou being the Treasurie of knowledge , art despised and contemned ? Either there is some great defect in thee , or some euill disposition in them ; whereof the latter is most certaine . They come vnto thee ( wanting the ballast of graue counsell and sound aduice ) like a Ship without sand or grauell in the Keele of her , to keepe her steady ; through lacke whereof the Barkegoes roullingand tottering to and fro , because their shallow braines want that due weight and counterpoyse , that should ballace their vnderstanding , and keepe it straight and vpright .

To this purpose I will tell you a tale , worthy of long consideration , though the discourse be short , and feigned for this effect .

When Ioue had made the fabricke of this Vniuerse , it seeming vnto him , A pretty Tale . that all was faire & perfectly good , before he created man , he formed all other liuing creatures ; amongst the which , the Asse being desirous to be the most remarkable and renowmed of all the rest , ( which had he not done , he had not beene an Asse ) as soone as he had scarce newly opened his eyes , beholding this glorious and beautifull frame , he was wonderfull iocund and merry ; began to Iupiter and the Asse . leape & to skip from one place to another , and to bray ( as they vse to do ) aloud ( being the first trumpeter , that euer was in the world ) till being quite wearied out , and glad to take his ease , being a little gentler and cooler then h●… was before , it began to come in his minde ; How , from whence , and when he was an Asse ; for that he had not beene an Asse from the beginning , nor begotten by an Asse . Which made him to examine with himselfe why , and to what end he was created , and what place should be prouided for him , where hee might take his rest ; it being a thing proper vnto Asses , to take the ends of things into their confideration , when they are already past all remedie , and ( as we say ) at the last cast , when the iollitie of their youth is past , the●… merry dayes spent and gone , and their pleasures at an end .

And yet would to God , that some would come to this amendment , and perseuer therein , a a Tempran●… se recoje , quie●… ta●…de se conuierte . Que temprano se recoje , quien tarde se conuierte . For he recals himselfe in time , that returnes at last . In this melancholy humour , my honest Asse comes me to Iupiter , humbly beseeching him , that he would bee pleased to reueale vnto him , who he was , and for what end hee had created him ? Iupiter told him , For the seruice of Man , and told him by piece-meale one after another , all those duties and seruices belonging to his charge , and what manner of burthens he was to beare .

Which newes was so vnpleasing vnto him , that vpon the very hearing of it , there suddenly came bruises and gallings vpon his backe , and hardnesse of hoofes , with his head and eyes hanging downe to the ground for very griefe . And out of a conceited feare of his future labour , ( for euils not yet indured , out of the noyse and rumour that they make , doe , at the first nomination of them , feare vs more then when we afterwards proue them ) he remained in that sad and melancholy dumpishnesse as we now vsually see him , conceiting that to be a most yerkesome and painefull kinde of life whereunto hee was destinated .

Whereupon he farther intreated of Iupiter , that hee would be pleased to tell him , how long he was to lead this miserable life ? Iupiter told him , he was to continue therein , the full tearme of thirtie yeeres .

The Asse hereupon began to mourne and grieue anew , it seeming vnto him , to be as it were a perpetuall and eternall slauerie , if it should last so long : And therefore once more he humbly besought Iupiter , that hee would haue compassion of him , and not suffer him for so long a season , to indure so hard a seruitude . And being that he had not yet dis-merited of him , by any fault that he had committed against him , nor would ( if otherwise he could choose , ) euer offend him , that ten yeeres might suffice for his liuing in this base fashion ; all which time he would faithfully promise vnto him , to serue man wel & truly , like an honest Asse , with all meeknesse and fidelitie . And those other twentie , which were ouer and aboue remaining vnto him , that he would bestow the ouer-plus of those yeeres vpon some one , that were better able to beare them .

Iupiter being moued with these his humble and earnest intreaties ( looking , poore silly foole , most pitifully , ) granted him his request . Whereupon the Asse was not al-together so sad as he was before .

The Dogge , whose nature it is , to winde and sent out things , stood all Iupiter and the Dogge . this while attentiuely hearkening to all that had passed betwixt Iupiter and the Asse . And being desirous likewise to know something concerning his good or bad fortune ; albeit hee carryed himselfe herein like a Dog , seeking to nose out that which was not lawfull for him ; to wit , the secrets of the gods , which are only reserued to themselues , ( of which nature are future things , and such as are to fall out hereafter ; ) yet notwithstanding his errour therein was worthy some excuse , because hee had the manners to craue this kindenesse of Iupiter , and did not , as some women doe , and some of those peraduenture that now heare me , who without God , ( but not without the Deuill ) seeke after Witches and Gypsies , to tell them their fortunes .

But how can they tell thee any good , who them-selues are so bad ? They Witches and Gypsies , full of fraud and dec●… . tell them a thousand lyes , and fraudulent inuentions , and steale from them ( be it good or bad ) all that they can finger , leauing them afterwards amazed , ashamed , mocked , and deceiued , and laught at for fooles as long as they liue .

But to returne to our Story that wee haue in hand ; The Dogge came to Iupiter , and besought him , ( seeing that he had proceeded with the Asse , his Companion , so graciously , giuing him vpon the hearing of his Petition , satisfaction to his demaunds ) that hee would likewise affoord him the like fauour .

Who made him this answere ; that his Office must be to runne a hunting , and to kill Hares , and Conies , but not to touch or eate one bit of them , but The Dogs office . with all faithfulnesse to resigne them vp vnto his Master . And afterwards , when he should returne home weary and stiffe with hunting , and following of his Game , he must be content to submit himselfe to be tyde to a post , to guard the house , where he should wait the eating of late and little suppers , feeding on a few cold ●…raps , and bee glad to gnaw vpon a bone , that had been already pickt and throwne away . And besides , ( which was worse then all the rest ) he should haue many a bang about the loynes with a Cudgell , and many a spurne and kicke with the foot .

Then did he aske him againe , for how long a time hee should indure all this paine ? Iupiter told him , thirty yeeres .

The Dogge , when he heard this his doome , was very much daunted , and discontented , as thinking it too intolerable a thing to be indured ; But relying on that grace and fauour , which Iupiter had shew'd the Asse ( hoping that he should taste as much of his goodnesse , as his fellow before him ) intreated him to take pitie of him , and that hee would not permit , that hee should receiue so much wrong , and bee so hard and coursely vsed ; for hee was the workman-ship of his hands , and no lesse his creature then was the Asse ; and besides , he was more louing and faithfull , then all the other beasts of the field . And that therefore hee would vouchsafe the fauour , if not to lessen the time of his troublesome life , yet at least to equall him with the Asse . Iupiter condescended . The Dogge , in token of his thankefulnesse , bowed his nose to the ground , remitting into his hands the remainder of those his other twenty yeeres .

Whilest these things were a doing , the Ape did not sleepe , but lay close , and listened very diligently to all that had past , longing to see what Iupiter , and the Ape . would be the end and successe of these their supplications . And because it is a peculiar propertie belonging to the Ape , to imitate that , which others doe , he would likewise in this follow his fellowes , being desirous also to know , what should become of him ? Perswading himselfe , that hee that had shewed so much mercy to the Asse , and the Dogge , would take no lesse pitie of him .

Here-vpon , he goes me to Iupiter , and humbly intreats him that hee would deigne to giue him some light of that , which was like to befall him in the passage of this his life , and for what end he had created him ; for it was not a thing to be doubted , that he had made him in vaine .

Iupiter signified vnto him , that it should for the present bee sufficient for him , onely to know , that he must goe trayling of a chaine vpon the ground , The Apes office . with a great clogge at the end of it , that should continually accompanie him , and be bound as a Surety for him , in case he were not ty'de fast to some Post , or the barre of a Window ; where , in the Summer hee should suffer heate , and in the Winter , cold ; indure hunger and thirst ; eating his meat , leaping , and skipping , and fetching m●…ny a friscall . And that for euery bit they gaue him , he must first make a thousand chatterings with his teeth , and as many mowes and mops with his mouth , in requitall whereof he should receiue so many lashes with a whip , onely to prouoke others to laughter , and to make them merry .

He thought this was hard teaching , he did not halfe like it , it was too curst a Schoole for him to bee trayned vp in , and would then , ( if he could ) haue made show thereof by his many teares ; but putting a good face on the matter ( as your Apes can when they list ) and patiently brooking his hard fortune , he would faine likewise know , how long he must be ty'de to this hard course of life ? He receiued that answere from him , as the rest had before , to wit , thirty yeeres .

Grieued with this answere , but comforted with the hope that he had in the all mercifull Iupiter , he besought him that they might not be more then those of other beasts , and euen those few , he thought were too many to be indured .

Iupiter made good his request , and granted him what he desired ; and the Ape kissing his hand ( as if hee had beene borne a Courtier ) with a low Conge took his leaue , and went away with his other Companions & friends ; the Asse , and the Dogge .

After these things were thus finished and set in order , Iupiter at last created Iupiter and the Man . Man , making him a more perfect creature then any of the rest , giuing him an immortall and discursiue Soule ; He gaue him power and dominion ouer all that he had created vpon earth ; making him the vsu-fructuarie Lord thereof . Man was very well pleased there with , and tooke great delight in beholding how goodly a creature he was ; how faire and beautifull ; how curiously organized ; how handsomely shap't ; how strongly set ; how great and powerfull a Prince ; insomuch that hee beganne to thinke with himselfe , that such an excellent fabricke , was worthy immortalitie . And therefore he intreated Iupiter to tell him ; not , what should become of him hereafter , but onely , how long he was to liue ? Iupiter replyde ; That when he first determined the creation of all kinde of liuing creatures , and more particularly of Man , hee was then resolued to haue giuen euery one of them thirty yeeres of life apiece .

Man here-vpon , beganne much to maruell , and wonder at the matter , that for so short a time , he had made so admirable a piece of worke ; for in the opening and shutting of the eye , like vnto a Flower , his life should passe away , and should scarce bring his feet from forth his mothers wombe , but that he is entring with his head into that of the earth , rendring vp his body to the graue , not inioying his age , nor that delightsome and pleasant seat , wherein he had been created .

And therefore considering with himselfe what had lately passed betwixt Iupiter and those other three beasts before-mentioned , hee humbled himselfe before him , and with a lowly ( but pleasing ) countenance , bespake him thus :

Supreme Iupiter ; if my demand shall not be troublesome vnto thee , and H●… man should treat with God ? against thy diuine Orders and Decrees , ( for my intent shall neuer extend it selfe to any the least breach of the least of them ; nor shall I euer require any thing of thee , but what shall be fitting for me to craue , and shall stand with thy willingnesse to grant , alwayes conforming my will to thine ) I humbly begge this boone at thy hands , that thou wilt bee pleased , ( since that these brute beasts , vnworthy of these thy fauours , haue refused that life which thou gau'st them , the happinesse whereof , as being depriued of reason , they did not well vnderstand , in that they haue euery one of them surrendred twenty yeeres of those , which thou granted'st vnto them , ) to bestow those yeeres vpon me , which they haue refused , that my life may thereby be inlarged ; and thou , by me , the better serued .

Iupiter gaue eare to this his Petition ; and granted vnto him , that ( as Man ) he should liue but his owne thirty yeeres . Marry when they were spent , hee should inherit those of the other three in their order .

First , he should enioy the Asses twenty , supplying his Office , in moyling and toyling in the world , tumbling and tossing to and fro , first to one place , and then to another , carrying and re-carrying home , and out againe , carking and caring to prouide for the necessaries of this life . This thou must doe , ( if thou meane to liue another day ) from thy thirty , to fifty .

Now from fifty to seuenty , thou shalt liue like a Dogge , barking at ●…e , snarling at another ; grumbling at this , and growling at that , vexing thy selfe , and offending others .

And lastly , from seuenty to ninety , thou must play the Ape , counterfetting those thy defects of Nature , and vsing of tricks and toyes , and I know not what foolish and fantasticall deuices .

And hence is it , that wee often see in those that come to this Age ( for all The folly of some old men . they be so old ) would faine seeme young ; Tricking themselues vp so neatly and so sprucely , ietting it ( like yong Gallants ) vp and downe the streets in gay cloathes , visiting this Lady , making loue to that Mistresse , and vndertake , I know not what impossibilities , that they may be accounted iolly stout Gentlemen , representing that , which indeed they are not , euen iust for all the world , as the Ape doth , who is neuer quiet , nor thinkes himselfe well pleased , but when in his actions he is imitating man , though he can neuer come to be a man .

It is a terrible thing , and not to bee indured , that men will , in despight as it were of Time , ( which discouers all deceits ) and ought likewise to put them out of this their errour ; will apply themselues to runne a course contrarie to the truth , and that with their tinctures , playstrings , lees , and slibber-slabbers , should play as it were with a Iugglers boxe , to coozen others , and discredit themselues .

As if by these Artifices , they could eate the more , sleepe the sounder , liue the longer ; or be troubled with the fewer infirmities and diseases ; or that by this course they take , the teeth which they haue shed , would come againe , or to keepe those from falling from them , which are yet remaining . Or as if by this meanes , they could repaire their feeble limmes ; recouer their naturall heat ; quicken anew their old and frozen bloud ; or as if thereby they did thinke they had the power in their owne hands , to make themselues what they list , and as lusty as they list : In a word , as if they were ignorant what the world talkes of them ; when as they themselues talke of nothing else , then which is the better lye , and which the better dye ; which either this , or that other man makes . Nor is all this , which I haue now deliuered vnto you , much amisse from the purpose ; being that I am to make my conclusion touching this point , the propositions consisting of two Gentlemen , both free-men of this foolish Company , for whose sake you haue had the Premises .

My Lord the Embassador ( as you haue already heard ) kept a free Table , was rich , and tooke great pleasure in keeping a good house . And because all A Tale of two Gentlemen , that dined with the French Embassador . guests doe not alwayes giue content ; it one day hapned , that hee made a feast for the Spanish Embassador : and amongst diuers other Gentlemen , there came two to dinner vnto him , that were principall Persons : the one a Captaine ; the other , a Doctor of Law : But to his Lordship both troublesome and wearisome alike , for the great pleasure that they tooke to heare themselues talke . Of whose impertinencies , and friuolous discourses , my Lord had in priuate some speech with me heretofore .

For albeit he tooke great delight and contentment in hearing men of wit and learning , speakers of truth , and such as were discreet in their carriage and behauiour ; so on the contrary , could he by no meanes indure any kinde Lyer●… and Flatterers , hated of all good men . of falsehood or lying , though it were but in iest and merriment .

He could not abide an Hypocrite , or a flatterer ; plaine dealing with him was a iewell ; He would , that mens words and workes should be simple , without sophistication , and truly noble , without any manner of doubling , and dissimulation .

And howbeit in these two men , there were very good motiues and reasons to cause men to hate and abhorre them , yet I am of the minde , and hold it infallibly true , that in the liking , or disliking of this , or that man , one more then another , there is some Celestiall influence conspiring there-withall ; and on these two had it wrought with great efficacie , and strong effects ; for there was no man but did hate them .

My Master would faine haue rid his hands of them , and haue shak't them off , but he could not ; for that they met him in the street in his way homeward , and would needs waite on him to his house , as men that did much honour his Lordship , and did owe him a great deale more seruice , then this their willing attendance vpon his person , whereunto they owed all respect . So that my Lord ( being so noble a Gentleman as he was ) was driuen by force to inuite them to stay dinner , who had as it were by force accompanied him to his house . Nor is there any vexation , that can vexe a man more , then such petty vexations , which a man would faine put off , but knowes not handsomely how to doe it . O this incroaching kindenesse , what a crosse it is , when it shall be inforced vpon a man whether he will or no , vnlesse the one will be as vnciuill as the other is impudent !

As soone as I saw my Lord enter within the gates , I perceiued presently by his countenance , that something , what-euer it were , did trouble him . I looked earnestly vpon him , and he vnderstood my meaning . Hee told me what it was , ( speaking vnto me with his eyes , by casting them vpon those two Gentlemen ; ) and I needed no farther instruction to direct me , what I had to doe .

I held my peace for the present , and dissembled my anger , beginning to cast about with my selfe , what course I were best to take , to make these men , ( who had so distasted my Master ) a sport and laughing-stocke to all the rest of the company , and so make them pay dearely for their dinner .

I had no sooner entertained this thought , but there came presently into my head a pretty odde pranke , that made fit for my purpose . Nor did I take much paines in the finding of it out ; for they came thither handsomely interlarded , and the iest , themselues had brought it along with them ready drest , and very well seazond . Only I expected a fit occasion , to set it before them , which was now neere at hand . But I did deferre it , till the last course should bee serued in , and al-most ended , that it might take the better . For the a a Que la boca se hincha de risa , no ha de estar el vientre bazio de vianda . mouth , that will be filled with laughter , must not haue it's bellie Prouerb . emptie . A merry heart , and a hungry maw , seldome meet . Tanto se rie , quanto se come . As a man likes his fare , so hee laughes ; proportioning his mirth , according to his meat . The Cloth was laid , meat on the boord , the Guests were merry , healths went round , and when I saw their blouds grew warme , and that they were set vpon the merry pinne , talking and laughing on all hands , some of one thing , some of another , a little before they were to wash , the Towell being not yet throwne on the boord , nor the Bason and Ewer set downe , I came close to the Captaines side , and rounding him in the eare , told him a notable non sequitur ; He laught heartily at it ; and being bound to requite me with another , made me bend downe my head towards his bosome , that he might the better tell it me in mine eare ; and so in secret , we made two or three passages one vpon another ; and when I saw my time , and that it serued fit for my purpose , I began to raise my voyce anote higher , and with a cheerefull looke , smiling merrily vpon him , ( as if we had talked all this while of that which I shall now tell you , when ( God he knowes ) we had neuer a word of any such matter I told him , No , my Sennor Capitan , no , Guzman puts a tricke vpon the Doctor and the Captaine . you shall pardon me , I will not ; if your Worship will vent it your selfe , you may better doe it then I , for you haue a good tongue to put it home , and a better arme to maintaine it . I will hatch none of your egges ( good Captaine ) forth with them your selfe . For these are no fit and sauory Iests , for such a poore Youth as I am , and being so great a seruant of Master Doctors , as no man in the world can be more .

With that , My master , and all the rest of the Guests besides , began to crie out vnto meat once , How now , Guzmanillo , what 's the matter ? I know not , Sir , vnlesse my noble Captaine here long to see my crowne shauen , and to haue me to take my Degrees , which it seemes , hee would faine haue me to doe , seeking to set the Doctor and mee together by the eares , and putvs to the paring of each others nayles , till wee bee both toucht to the quicke .

The Captaine , when he heard me say so , was frost-bitten , and maruelling what the mystery of this roguerie should be , suspected there was some knauerie in it , though he knew not what . And not knowing what to doe , fell a laughing , without speaking any one word at all .

But the Spanish Embassadour call'd vnto me , and said , Friend Guzman , now by my life , you shall not smother it ; what 's the matter , I prithee ? Let vs know of thee , why at one and the selfe-same time , thou laughest , and yet seemest angry ? It must needs be some good conceit or other , and therefore out with it .

Seeing your Lordship hathlaid downe so great a pawne as your life , I shall ( though loth , and much against my will ) tell you what it is ; and I protest vnto your Lordship , that I had rather haue held my peace ; and had you not sworne by your life , I would sooner haue had my tongue drawne backwards out of the nape of my necke , then to vtter the least sillable of that which I shall now fully deliuer vnto you . Your Lordship shall therefore vnderstand , that my Captaine here laid his Command vpon me , that I would breake a iest vpon this Doctor , my worthy and noble friend ; girding at the cut of his beard ; for he saith that the fashion of his beard , is iust for all the world like one of those vpon your Flemmish Iugges , and that a-nights he puts it in a Presse ; made of two thinne Trenchers scru'de wonderfull close , that no Ghitterne can be closer shut vp in it's Case , that it may come forth the next morning with euen corners , bearing in grosse the forme of a Broome , narrow aboue , and broad beneath , his Muchatos , Ruler-wise , straite and leuell as a line ; and all the other haires , as iust and as euen , as a Priuet hedge , newly cut ; answering each other in a vniforme manner , hauing the point thereof in forme of a Quadrant , drawne neatly out , that it might make the fairer and larger show . For such a goodly Beard accompanied with a Roman Bonnet , ( like your Briefes and your Larg's in a Singing-mans Booke ; ) doth grace his lesser and grosser notes . As if this were sufficient to make him be held a great Scholler ; As if this faire out-side , were a qualification for him ; as if men had not seene your Cauallos Argeles , some horses with one only white foot on the farre side behinde , hauing all the other parts of their body of another colour , and yet come of a very good race . And some great block-heads , ( though bred vp in Vniuersities , ) whose ignorance is a great deale larger then their Gownes ; being like herein vnto some kinde of Melons , which coozen vs with the gloriousnesse of their colour , seeming to be good Melons to the show , but indeed are worse then Pompeons ; no stuffe , no goodnesse in them . And this is that , which my Captaine would haue had mee said , as from my selfe . And this was it which made mee cry , No , no ; and that he should tell it himselfe , and he would , for I would none of it . This is all , my Lord : if there be more behinde , your Lordship may be pleased to lay your Command on the Captaine , who ( I know ) wil be ready in this , or any thing else , to doe your Lordship seruice .

The Captaine blest himselfe , when he saw whither I had driuen the nayle , wondring at this my subtilnesse of witt , and cunning conueyance , himselfe and all the rest of the company laughing at it , but none of them witting whether it were a truth or a lye , that had past thus betweene vs .

But my Doctor , hauing his head well warmed with Wine , knew not whether he were best to be angrie , or to turne it to a iest ? But because they lookt still more and more vpon him , and euery ones eye was fixed on him , he pawsed a while , and carrying a countenance betwixt anger and shame , at last he vented himselfe , and spoke thus vnto them :

My Lord , if my profession would permit it , that I should giue my selfe that satisfaction , which such an impudencie as this deserueth , your Lordship might easily beleeue , that I would comply with that obligation , wherein I stand bound to my Progenitors , and the honour of my House .

But being that your Lordships presence doth priuiledge this insolent boldnesse , and that this place will afford me no other weapons then my tongue , your Lordship may be pleased to giue me leaue to demand of this Captaine , How old he is ? For if that be true which he sayes , that he serued the Emperour Charles the fifth in his warres , being with him at the battell of Tunez , how comes it to passe that he has neuer a white haire in all his beard , nor blacke one in his head ? And if he be so young , as he would seeme to be , why doth he say , that he was present with him , at such an ancient piece of seruice , and so long agoe as that was ? Let him tell vs , I pray , in what Iordan hee hath washed , or to what Saint recommended himselfe ; to the end that we may all offer vp Tapers to his shrine , and haue recourse vnto him for helpe , when we shall haue the like need ? Let him first declare this , and then let him goe on with his game , and I will play mine as well as I can . And since he hath first trumped about , let vs trie , who can soonest beate out one another and winne most Tricks . For there is no reason hee should so carry it away , nor shall he get any thing by his crossing of me , while I haue a trumpe in my hand .

All the whole boord fell a laughing a-fresh , but especially my Master , for that two things were then treated , which of all other he did hate and detest , and desired the reformation of them , as no man more .

And hauing well obserued all that had passed herein , hee said vnto mee ; Now tell me , Guzmanillo , what thou doest thinke of this ? Since thou hast The Conceit consists in the word , Lye ; for that they did colour the haires of their Beards , with lees made of purpose for that vse . proposed the Argument , I will haue thee to resolue the Question . I then told him , All the Answer that I can make your Lordship , is only this : That they haue both said Truth , and yet both of them lye ( a ) in their beards .

CHAPTER IV.

The Doctor finding himselfe aggrieued ; that Guzmanillo had wronged him in the presence of so many Gentlemen , would bee reuenged of him . The Spanish Embassadour takes vp the quarrell : The French causing another of the guests , that was there at Table , to relate an accident that befell the Constable of Castile , Don Aluaro de Luna .

THey did all highly commend the iest , and some did indeare it so farre , that the Doctor thereby was the more inraged , insomuch that they were sorry they had prest it so farre , and giuen it so great an applause .

But the Embassador of Spaine , through his great wisedome , threw in his a a The Spanish word , i●… meter el baston . A metaphor borrowed from a Master of Defence , who when his Schollers grow 〈◊〉 and angry at play , throwes in his cudgell betweene them , wherevpon they ●…old their ●…ands . So that meter el baston signifies metaphorically , the reconciling of friends ▪ when they begin to grow ch●… one with another . Warder , and tooke vp the quarrell , making it ( by his discreet handling of the matter ) a merry meeting onely of friends , where no exception was to bee taken at any thing that should merrily passe amongst them .

The Captaine was a good natur'd man , well behau'd , an old beaten Souldier , and a good fellow , who laught heartily at it , let it passe as a iest , and blessed himselfe , vowing and protesting , that hee neuer spake any one such word vnto mee , nor was it euer in his thought to touch vpon any such point . And though he were nipt , yet because he was a discreet Gentleman and a Souldier , ( amongst whom now and then iests are broken , as well as Lances ) should the Doctor haue vs'd him worse then he did , he would either not haue heard it , or seeme to set light by it , for that he thought he had some reason so to doe , because what he then spake , came from him , as one that had beene much iniur'd and abused .

But when the Doctor certainly knew , that I had been the onely Author of all this mischiefe , he did set vpon mee in that fierce and terrible manner , The Doctor grows very angry with Guzman . that he did cut his words with his teeth , not being able to pronounce them plaine , through his too much eagernesse , and heat of choller . And hee would faine haue risen from the table to haue had me by the eares , and to haue pummeld me soundly about the head and the nose , and to haue buffeted my cheeks ; but they would not suffer him so to doe .

And seeing he could not be reuenged of me as he would ; and hauing no other weapon left him to beat me withall but his tongue , he roundly laid about him , and letting the reines loose to his rage , he bestow'd his Liuery vpon me , calling me by all the vile names , that hee was able to reckon vp ; whereof I made little reckoning ; but did rather helpe him on , by teaching him what he should say .

This madded him more then all the rest , to see mee thus mocke and scoffe at all that hee said , which made him breake out worse then before , and to grow farre more violent and outragious with me . For , as if this bitter iest had beene some Excommunication , that by a ioynt consent , and generall Councell as it were , had gone out against him , and that euery one of vs had a finger therein , he car'd not whom he paid ; and almost , nay , more then almost , ( if my Master had not stopt him in this his furious course , as one that knew well , what a huge dust , a foolish cholericke fellow will sometimes raise , both to his owne and others hurt ) this businesse had growne exceeding foule . The French Embassador seekes to 〈◊〉 the 〈◊〉 .

He sought to pacifie him with the best reasons hee could then vse vnto him , as one that would faine turne the water another way , and diuert these his euill intensions towards me ; Which that hee might the better doe , hee beganne to shuffle the Cards anew , sundring the one from the other ; and that hee might wholly cut off all that former offensiue conuersation , hee turned himselfe towards Caesar , that Neapolitan Gentleman , who had told him of that sad accident , that had befalne Dorido and Clorinia ( who was likewise one of his guests ) and said vnto him :

Sennor Caesar , since the hard hap , and vntimely death of the faire Clorinia is now knowne to all Rome , and to these Gentlemen that are heere present , let vs intreat you to doe vs the fauour , to deliuer vnto vs , what became of constant Dorido ; for I haue a great desire to know how hee sped . That , and it may please your Excellencie ( said Caesar ) you shall heare in its due place and time ; for this is no fit season for it ; it being not meet to mingle such mis-fortunes amidst our merriments , nor will it sute so well with this day of feast and iollity , especially considering what hath passed heere already to the disturbance of this good company , that are met heere of purpose to bee merry .

But since that wee haue now dined , and the time of each mans taking his a a The Spanish word is Siesta . nap , drawes on , I will recount another Story vnto you , which this present occasion represents vnto me : Which for that it is a true one , I doubt not but yee will bee much delighted therewith . They all kindely entertained his proffer ; and when he saw they were attentiue to heare him , hee thus began :

The Constable of Castile , Don Aluaro de Luna , in the time of his greatest Greatnesse ( his Honours increasing dayly more and more ) residing in A Tale of diuers and sundry accidents of Loue . Ualladolid , tooke great pleasure in the Summer to rise betimes in the morning , to goe abroad to vse some exercise , and to take the fresh aire of the fields . And after that hee had beene walking thus abroad , hee would ( before the Sunne should bee able to offend him ) with-draw himselfe home to his house .

But hauing one day amongst the rest inlarged his Walke , and intertained himselfe longer then he was wont to doe , in a pleasant garden , neere adioyning to the Riuer Pisuerga , recreating himselfe in beholding the varietie of the Walkes , the beautifull Flowers , the delicate Arbours , the shadie Trees , and sauourie fruits , the heate entred in so farre , before hee was aware of it , that what out of his feare of not returning backe with conueniencie , and the content that hee tooke in this his sweet and delightfull recreation , hee was resolued to remaine there , and to take his full pleasure of that place , vntill such time of the euening , as the heates should bee ouer-past .

And whilest his other seruants were busie in prouiding all things necessarie for his dinner , that he might the better in the meane while passe away the time , he intreated two Gentlemen , that accompanied him thither , the one Don Luys de Castro ; and the other , Don Rodrigo de Montaluo , that each of them would tell him some Loue-Story , whose successe had beene full of dangers , and full of cares , as none could bee greater . For , he very well knew , that these two Gentlemen were the onely Gallants then in Court , and great Louers of Ladies , being both of them , besides Noble in their Name and Blood , discreet , valiant , actiue in their persons , of faire both feature and behauiour , curious in their cloathes , witty in their iests , vn-offensiuely pleasant ; in a word , so generally well qualified , and so adorned with all those ornaments , that might grace either their speech , or their actions , that they were very well able to giue him that satisfaction vpon this subiect , as more could not bee desired . And the better to animate them on he promised , in reward , a rich Diamond Ring , that hee then wore vpon his finger , to him , whose tale , for the strangenesse of the successe , should best deserue it . Don Luys de Castro was first to beginne , and thus hee proceeded :

It may bee ( my Lord Constable ) that other Louers , in the recounting of their misfortunes , goe painting and setting of them forth , with feined sorrowes , Hyperbolicall amplifications , such delicacie of phrase , and tendernesse of words , to worke compassion ; that with the smoothnesse of their stile , and the meltingnesse of their language , they moue many to pitie ; and of these in this kinde much hath been written . But that really and truely stript naked of all kinde of dressing , and the neat cloathing of eloquence , there should happen in these present times a businesse of the like nature , as is mine , that I haue now in hand , is a thing impossible . For it is one of the strangest , and the most to be wondred at , of all that euer I yet read , or heard of . And because your Excellencie is to bee my Iudge in this case , I am very well perswaded you will acknowledge as much , when you know my sufferings .

I loued a certaine Lady of this Kingdome , that was a Virgin , and ful-filled Don Luys de Castro his Loue-Story . with all those laudable and noble qualities , which might be found in any other who-soeuer ; being as faire and beautifull , as she was discreet and honest : whereof , ( and much more then I will now speake , ) I make Don Rodrigo de Montaluo heere present , my Witnesse ; as the onely friend , that bare mee company , and was thorowly acquainted with all that which past betweene vs ; I seru'd her many , ( and those the best part of my yeeres ) with that punctualitie and secresie , that there was neuer any the least notice taken of it , yet still obseruing her with that diligence , as the like was neuer knowne ; and indeuouring alwayes to giue her all those contents , which she could possibly desire from me . For her I ranne at the Ring , and euer made my selfe one , at the ●…uego de toros , y cannas , maintained Turneys , and Tiltings , ordained Royall Feasts , and Maskes ; and what not ? And for to quit all suspition , and to carry the businesse so handsomely , that none might finde me out , and discouer this my loue ; nay , that they might not haue any the least presumption thereof ; at all these great & solemn meetings , my eyes were neuer placed vpon her , but some other of the Ladies that were there , though shee notwithstanding did really and truely know , that those of my soule were neuer off on her , but still waited vpon her , and that shee was the sole Mistris of my heart , and that for her sake onely , and none but hers , I inuented all these honourable pleasures , and delightfull intertainments for her .

Vpon these kinde of Feasts and Sports , and other the like occasions , directed onely to this end , I spent so much , that I wasted and consumed a great deale of wealth , letting my money fly the faster , in hope it might make her come the sooner ; and selling away my possessions , that I might compasse the possessing of her ; which was to me a treasure of more worth then all the world besides .

My father ( it is well knowne ) left mee wonderfull rich , both in goods , and in lands , but in short , I sent it packing ; and past away one thing after another , till in the end I became so poore , that your Lordships fauour is the onely prop that doth vphold mee , without the which I must haue falne . And though this ( I must tell you ) be none of the least griefes , to see a Gentleman of such parts and qualities as my selfe , to be outed of all that hee has , to become so poore and needy , that necessitie must tye him to serue , who was wont heretofore to be serued ; ( howbeit , I acknowledge it a happinesse vnto me , that I am your Lordships seruant . ) Though I must confesse withall , they are the happier men , and the more beholding to fortune , who A free c●…tented 〈◊〉 the best . leade a quiet and secure life , free from other mens commands , not beating their braines , nor breaking their sleepes , in seeking meanes , how to creepe into this mans fauour , or to scrue himselfe into that , or t'other Lords good grace and opinion .

But of all my misfortunes , the greatest that euer befell me ▪ and which ●…its closest to my heart , and doth fret the very soule of me , and fill it with anguish , was , That my Mistresse hauing intertained me with false hopes , and vaine promises , vowing , that she would neuer bestow her fauours vpon any other , but that in recompence of my constant loue ▪ she would be married vnto me , where-vnto she plighted me her faith and troth . But whether these were the words of a woman , or the workes of my short fortunes ; now when she saw my meanes were spent , and my selfe growne poore , vn-mindefull of all those in dearements , vowes and protestations that had past betweene vs , shee shooke off that hand of hers from mine , to whom she had first giuen it , and gaue it to another , and forsaking me , married him ; failing ( false as she was ) in her faith , and qualitie : for scorning my poore condition , and not esteeming those my other good naturall parts , she made choyse of those goods of fortune , taking a Husband farre vnequall to her selfe ; for , as he exceeded in wealth , so he did in yeeres . But such is the force of money , that it can supply all defects , and driue vnequall matches , to draw in one yoke .

Thus haue I briefely discoursed vnto your Lordship touching my loue , shewing you how happy the beginning was , and how disastrous the end . And although ( that I might not weary and tyre out your Lordship , I haue beene so briefe , that the shortnesse of my Discourse may seeme to lessen my misfortunes , and the miseries that I then indured ; ) yet I presume , your Lordships discretion will supply that want , and fully conceiue what , and how great they were ; As also take into your consideration , how many troubles they haue suffred , and how many perils they dayly runne thorow , who wing their thoughts with ●…uch high-flying feathers , and who vse such great diligence and secrecie in the carriage of their loue , to the end that nothing on their part should be wanting , which they thought belonged to their dutie , in that behalfe . Which my selfe had speciall care of .

I doe not thinke that either Don Rodrigo , or any other Gentleman whatsoeuer can instance in a successe of more misfortune then this of mine ; for that louing her with that firmenesse and constancie , ( as I did ) and seruing her with that loue and faithfulnesse , ( as none possibly could be more ; ) I lost my time , I lost my meanes , and last of all ( to make the roll of my miseries the fuller ) I lost my Mistris . Only there is left vnto me by fortune , ( in exchange of these my many mischances ) the receiuing of this Ring , by way of reward .

And here Don Luys made an end of his amorous discourses , and Don Rodrigo de Montaluo entred vpon his , in manner following :

The Ring ( Don Luys ) is none of yours , you haue lost it , and I ought of right to haue it . And turning himselfe towards the Constable , he thus went on in his speech :

Most noble Sir , Though I confesse that to be true , which Don Luys hath deliuered vnto your Lordship , for that I was an eye-witnesse of all this businesse , in regard of that great loue and friendship , which was euer betweene vs ; yet now at this present , he hath no reason to pretend the Diamond ; for if he would but free himselfe of passion , and put on temperate consideration of the pāssages in this his loue , and that he and I might but change places , I doe assure my selfe , that he would iudge this cause in my fauour , and giue sentence against himselfe . But being that he is now blinded so with passion , that he can not discerne things with indifferencie ; your Excellencie may be pleased to iudge first of his Loue , and afterwards to censure the bad successe of mine : which shall take it's beginning from the end of his , which your Excellencie hath already heard him recount . And thus ( may it please you to giue me the hearing ) did things passe .

It is not long agoe , that he and I went walking abroad neere to this Riuer side , where now we are , talking and discoursing of some things farre out of the reach of our hopes ; when vnlooked for , there came to Don Luys , an ancient seruant belonging to this Gentlewoman his Mistresse , from whom he secretly deliuered him a Letter . Which he hauing opened , and read it ouer , when he had done , he gaue it me , that I likewise might peruse it . Which I did againe and againe , wondring very much at the Contents thereof . For which cause , ( as also hauing a reasonable good memorie , ) I carried it all away ; which speaketh after this manner :

DEare Sir , you haue little reason to accuse me of ingratitude , only because it seemes vnto you , that you haue some iust cause so to doe . For it is not possible that any one should forget ( as you haue thought of me ) him , whom he truly loues . And since I know mine owne Obligation , and your constancie , I would haue you likewise to vnderstand ( though perhaps you will not acknowledge so much ) that I neither now doe , or haue heretofore committed any fault against you . And that my Actions did not correspond with your deserts , the reason was , because they could not stand with that Decorum , which was due to my Mayden-state , and the danger that might insue thereupon . My Marriage with you ( which I desired more , then I did mine owne life ) the obedience of a Daughter did disturbe , and the Commands and earnest importunities of my Parents , who were violently carryed away , moued thereunto by vaine interest , and the Title of a Countesse , which I hold against my will , since they did force me to yeeld my body vnto him , to whom I could neuer surrender my soule , being in condition and yeeres so contrary vnto me , I haue beene yours , I am yours , and shall be yours all the dayes of my life . I shall giue you to vnderstand , that the Count my Husband is to vndertake a long iourney ; hasten hit her vnto me as soone as you 〈◊〉 , and bring no other person along with you saue your friend Don Rodrigo . And when you shall come to this Towne , you shall finde in a Heremitage adioyning thereunto , order giuen you for that , which you are to doe . Loue me with all your heart ( as you were wont ) and as I doe you . And liue you as happily , as I wish you ; Concluding my Letter with deare imbracements , which attend your comming .

These were the Contents of the Letter ; which Don Luys hauing well seene and considered , did expect nothing lesse , then what was therein contained , which was the only thing he wished and desired aboue all other happinesse in this world . So that if I would , yet I should not be able to expresse vnto you , those amorous passions that he then felt . He read it ouer and ouer , dwelling vpon euery word and sillable of this Letter . He looked vpon euery line , more then once or twice , weigh'd them as a man would weigh gold ; and when he had ballanced them in his iudgement , and found they were not light , but bare their full poyze , putting them to his mouth , hee kist them a thousand and a thousand times ouer . Hee first look't earnestly on the Letter , then on the bearer , and my selfe , as if he stood expecting that wee should speake our mindes , and with a loud voyce proclaime the certaintie of this his promised good , and the great content that he tooke in this fortunate , but vnexpected newes . For as yet he doubted thereof : but at last , when he had recollected his spirits , which had beene all this while a woolgathering , with somewhat a troubled , but more cheerefull countenance , he said vnto me , What is this ( Don Rodrigo ) that we see ? Am I out of my wits ? Or is this a dreame ? Art thou sure , that it is thee and I , that haue read this Letter ? Is this happely the Countesses Letter , this her owne hand ? and that , her old Seruant ? Doth my iudgement peraduenture faile me ? Or , as an afflicted Louer , growing on to desperation , doe I feigne imaginations to my selfe , to deceiue my phantasie ?

After that he had thus continued a while , driuen to and fro with these distractions , as a Boat that waues this way and that way , hauing the tyde with it , but the winde against it ; I assured him , that these were not illusions , or idle apparitions , but things really true , and that carried along with them assured hopes of recouering and inioying his lost Iewell . And thereupon I heartened him on , that he should hasten his departure with all possible speed , that he might comply with that , which his Mistresse had giuen him in charge . This was presently put in execution ; for we streight tooke horse , and away we went . And when we came to the Heremitage , we found therein a very graue and reuerend Dame , who , for that she had notice giuen her before hand , of the day and houre that we were to come thither , stayd there , expecting of our comming .

Now , when she knew that we were the men she looked for , she deliuered vs a Message , the effect whereof was this ; That her Lord , the Conde , was gone forth vpon his iourney , but was now newly returned , by reason of a certaine indisposition of body that seazed on him vpon the way : But intreated vs notwithstanding , that we would haue the patience to stay there , till she went to the Palace , to acquaint her Lady the Countesse , of our comming ▪ She went ; we staid ; I much amazed , and Don Luys quite out of heart : I for those difficulties , which might offer themselues ; He in considering his crosse fortune , which did neuer leaue off to persecute him .

Now , while this good woman was gone vpon her errand , in the meane while , till she should make her returne , we ranne ouer many stories , and I know not what idle tales and discourses ▪ which being of different subiects , are not fit to be inter-serted with this that we haue now in hand .

Well , about eleuen a clocke at night , shee came backe a gaine vnto vs , and told vs , we must follow her . We did so . The darkenesse of the night did much befriend vs , so that by this good helpe , she brought vs vnseene , and with much secrecie , into a Lodging in the Palace , where we no sooner were , but the Countesse comes forth , and receiues vs with extraordinary tokens of ioy and gladnesse . And after that some few ceremonies were ended , and that the Para-bienes had past to and fro of this long desired inter-view , which Compliments were very short and briefe , the Countesse said vnto mee , Don Rodrigo ; the time , that is now offred vnto vs , to inioy this faire occasion , you , in your owne discretion may iudge , how soone it will be gone . You know likewise the obligation of true friendship , and the firme affection , which you haue alwayes made shew to beare vnto Don Luys : but say , this should faile ( which I no way mis-doubt , ) yet for my sake , who beg it at your hands , your are bound in courtesie to grant me my request . You haue already vnderstood , how the Count my husband not finding himselfe halfe well , returned ( being well aduanced on his way ) backe from his iourney , who came home so weary , that he presently got him to bed , where I haue left him fast asleepe . But because it may so fall-out , that in turning or waking , hee should stretch out a legge or an arme , towards that side of the bed where I lye , and should finde my place empty , and no body there , it must be a great deale of danger , that I must runne , besides the great scandall , that would grow thereby to the house , that therefore , whilest your friend Don Luys and my selfe shall entertaine the time in talke , ( which at the most shall bee but some quarter of an houre , or there-abouts , ) you would be pleased to goe lye downe in my place , and remaine there in bed , that I may in the meane-while abide the safer here . And I will assure you on my honest word , that you shall not thereby incurre any danger . For besides that the Count is old , and that he neuer wakes a-nights , vntill it be broad day , and doth seldome or neuer turne aboue once , and then presently fall asleepe againe ; Hee is so tyred with his iourney , and of that indisposition of body at this present , that there is no feare to be had , that hee will so much as but offer to stirre , or moue himselfe at all . But say hee should , and that he should turne and touch you , for the foresaid reasons , he will not dreame of any bodies being there but my selfe .

God he knowes ( and your Excellencie may conceiue ) how much it troubled mee , that the Countesse should put mee vpon such a perilous piece of seruice . But because the actions of cowardize are so foule in themselues , and so ill-beseeming a Gentleman , it seemed vnto mee , that if I should now fly off , and refuse to vndergoe this businesse , I should not giue satisfaction either to mine owne Honour , or my friends Loue , or the Countesses request , I told her , I would very willingly , and with all my heart doe her this seruice : but withall , did very earnestly intreat them , that they would not stay too long in the intertaining of their loues , seeing they were not ignorant of the danger , where-into for their sakes I did thus voluntarily thrust my selfe . They promised , nay swore vnto me , that they would not ; and that at the most she would not tarry away aboue halfe an houre .

The Countesse put mee into a night-dressing , and a Smocke : and when I had put off all my cloathes , shee led me along to her With-drawing chamber , and afterwards made me to lye downe in her bed . There was no light at all in the Chamber , all was as darke as hell , and in a still silence . I softly laid my selfe downe vpon the very edge and brimme , as it were of the bed , as farre from the Count , as I possibly could deuise , and in that manner , I remained there , not a quarter , or halfe part of an houre , but fiue good long houres and more , till it was breake of day .

Now let euery man consider and thinke with himselfe , in what a poore case I was , being in such a place as this , and at such a time ; with what a deale of care that I might not be knowne , and with what a deale of feare , lest this deceit should be discouered , and did least of all thinke on that , which did most concerne me , which could bee no lesse then death , if the Count should chance to awake . For in regard that I went in thither naked , and vnarmed , I must fight it out with my fists onely , and try how the strength of my armes would helpe me ; and admit I should haue struggled with the Count , and had the fortune to escape his hands , yet could I not those of the seruants of his house , because I knew not how , nor which way to order my flight .

But these were not all the griefes I then indured , they went on a little farther . For Don Luys and the Countesse , did laugh and talke so loud , that I might heare euery word almost that they said , as I lay in the bed , where-with my feare was much increased lest happely their dis-composed carriage might chance to awaken the Count ; and it did mightily vexe me , and almost mad mee , that I could not call vnto them to keepe lesse noise , seeing they would not yet breake company , it grieuing me to the very soule , that they should seeme as forgetfull of themselues , as they were of mee . This made me to bite my fingers ends for very anger ; as also , that I durst not for mine eares stirre a ●…ot from the place where I lay for feare of spotting mine honour ; and lesse did I dare to call vnto them , for feare of waking the Count.

After all these lingrings , and fearefull passages , when they saw that day was now so nigh , they came both of them laughing hand in hand to the beds side , with a light in their hand ▪ ( I being frighted almost out of my little wits ) where they sportingly frisked and skipped about me , making a great noise , as well with their tongues , as their feet .

Then I beganne to imagine with my selfe , that through too much content , they had both runne madde . So that now , I was as sorry for their misfortune , as mine owne ; for that the infamie and punishment was like to be generall , and to light vpon vs all , not permitting any to escape ; vpon them , for offending ; vpon me , for consenting . I was in that pittifull taking , that within a very little space , I had a thousand imaginations in my head , but not one that could doe me any good , or stand me in stead .

And whilest I was thus puzzled , in the midst of my greatest conflict , they drew neerer to the bed it selfe ; and the Countesse drawing the Curtaine , that we might now plainely see one another , then was I quite out of my sences ; insomuch that I would haue faine fledde away , had I well knowne whither : but I quickly came to my selfe againe . For I , who had hitherto thought , that I had the Count lying by me ; the Countesse lifting vp the cloathes of the bed , cleered that errour , and gaue me to vnderstand , that it was not hee , but the Countesses Sister , a pure Virgin , yet as faire as Uenus . Whereat , as likewise the iest , ( which I now perceiued they had put vpon me ) I was so ashamed , and dasht out of countenance , that for my life I was not able to speake a word , nor knew not what in the world to doe , but to rise vp in my smocke ( for in that case was I then ) and to get me out to looke my cloathes ; so that my feare before was not halfe so much , as my shame was now . Let your Excellencie therefore be pleased now to consider into what danger I did put my selfe , and then to giue your iudgement , which of vs two doth best deserue the Ring .

The Constable , laughing heartily hereat , said in the end , That Don Luys had no reason to complaine of his Loue ; seeing , though late , and with a great deale of cost and trouble , yet at length hee had obtained his desire ; so that hee could not be a deseruer of this promised reward . And Don Rodrigo , as little ; for that hee was not in any danger by sleeping with the Count ; howbeit , the iest they had put vpon him , was a witty and a good one . And therefore his Sentence was this , that neither of them deserued the Diamond ; yet , taking it off from his finger , he consign'd it to Don Rodrigo , with condition that he should send it as a token to this Gentlewoman , by whose side he lay ; for that shee onely had incurred the danger , and had also runne the hazzard of her honour , if she had beene knowne what she was .

With this , they gaue an end to their Loue-Discourses , they all remaining very well satisfied . And it being afterwards discussed , whether the Constables Sentence were discreet and iust ; all the Courtiers highly commended it . And so euery mans businesses , calling some one way , some another ; this conuersation was broken vp , and taking their leaue of my Lord Embassador , they went whither their occasions call'd them .

CHAPTER V.

A Romane Matrone , not knowing how to free her selfe ( without suffering in her Honour ) from the perswasions of Guzman de Alfarache , who sollicited her in his Lords behalfe , the French Embassador , put a iest vpon him , which was the occasion of a second disgrace that afterwards befell him .

THey that write of Lightening , report , ( and wee see the same confirmed by experience , ) that so great is its The nature of Lightening . pride , that scorning the weaker , it workes its effects on the strongest . It breakes the steely hardnesse of the Sword , and leaues the scabberd whole : it splits in sunder , and rendeth vp by the rootes the strong and sturdy Oake ; and not once toucheth the feeble and yeelding Cane . It ouer-turnes the tops of your highest Towers , and leuelleth your stately buildings with the ground ; and pardoneth your poore Shepheards humble Cottage , that is made of ill composed twigges . It killeth your biggest beasts , and cracketh man , as if hee were but Potters Clay in pieces ; it bruiseth and breaketh the bones , and leaues the cloathes vntoucht ; it melteth Siluer , Gold , Metall , and Money , and yet hurts not the Purse wherein it is put . And albeit , it be of this proud nature and haughty condition , yet is its force broken , in its comming to ground . This onely is that , which makes its resistance against it . And therefore , in such tempestuous times , those that doe feare its terrible effects , doe vse to get themselues into Caues , or to hide themselues deepe vnder ground , because that they know , they are there safe and free from danger .

The violence of Youth is such , that wee may truely compare it vnto Lightening ; for it neuer bends its force against things that are fragile , soft , The violence of youth , compared vnto Lightening . and gentle ; but doth commonly aspire to things of greatest difficultie , and such as are beyond all reason of atchieuement ; it obserueth no Law ; it excuseth no kinde of Vice ; it is a Horse that runnes on in his Carreere , without The defects and various effects of youth . an eye to its way , or once thinking on the place , or the end , where he is to take vp himselfe , and make his stop . It alwayes followes its owne furie ; and like an vntamed Colt , will not suffer himselfe to bee saddled by reason ; and without it , disturbs both himselfe and others , not induring any burthen , bee it neuer so light : In such sort it flyes out , that it will not ( no though you let it haue its owne will ) be at quiet with it selfe . And yet this being so furious a beast , as wee haue heere set forth vnto you , it is onely corrected by humilitie ; this ( and nothing but this ) tames and keepes it in order . This is that earth , against which its force cannot preuaile ; this that Dock , that driues out the Nettle ; and this that Fort , where it findes its safety . Insomuch , that there is not any good to bee hoped from that young man , who shall not be humble . For that youth in it selfe is the entrance to euill , and the doore that opens vnto sinne .

I was wantonly bred vp , suffered too much to haue mine owne will : I I●… 〈◊〉 , the cause of all Vice . would not indure reproofe , much lesse correction . And for that Wisedome is the Daughter of Experience , which is gotten by the trans-cursion of Time , it was not much , that I should erre as being a Youth . But that hauing befalne me ( which you heard before ) in the loue that I made at Malagon , a a See the first Part. and Toledo : And being that I should , like the Dogge which is scalded with hot , feare also cold water ; after all these faire warnings , it may He is a foole , that makes 〈◊〉 a prey to Women . seeme somewhat strange , you will say , that I should giue any more credit vnto women , and that I should suffer my selfe to be taken anew in their snares . That I should be such an Asse , as not to know , by my many the like experiences , that they alwayes goe subtilly to worke with vs , and deale deceitfully ; which must either be imputed to our too much simplicitie , or must otherwise be attributed to the intemperate passion of our appetite . And would to God this foolishnesse of mine might here make it's stop , and here in this Port set vp my Plus vltra , by erecting the pillars of my wofull proofes , and often skarrings , without ( as you shall see here-after ) my frequent fallings into the like weaknesses ; being vnable to make my vaunt , that I had once got of them by the hand , and made my party good with them . But because he that loues , doth alwayes make a free donation to the partie , whom he loueth , of his will , and of his senses , it is no maruell , if being stripped of them , multiplying my errours , I commit a thousand fooleries .

My Lord Embassadour fell in loue with a principall Gentle-woman , nobly descended , whose name was Fabia ; her husband , a Gentleman of Rome ; before A story of the French Embassadours loue . whose house I did often vse to walke ; whereof , no small notice was taken , and he himselfe began to conceiue some suspition of me , though without any iust cause ; for the for her part neuer gaue consent thereunto . But because euery man may loue , protest , and runne his head , if he will , against a Wall , and none shall hinder him ; my Master did that , which his passion did dictate vnto him , and she , that which was befitting both her owne , and her husbands honour .

True it is , that we were not so blinde , that we could not see thorow the Prouerb . holes of a a a No estauamos tan çiegos , que dexassemos de ver por la tela de vn çedaço . The greatest enemies , that a faire woman hath . siue ; for although we were depriued of the cleerer kinde of light , yet we had some glimpse and glimmering thereof , though it were but little . Her husband was old , poore , and ill accoutred ; three strong and powerfull enemies against a woman , that was young faire , and well brought vp . For these reasons , and by the helpe of a Maid of hers ( which had beene a Virgin heretofore ) but was now my sweet-heart , and mine owne deare Loue , I was verily perswaded , what by the meanes that she , and what by those , that my selfe should vse , as also by making benefit of the fore-said occasions , we should easily get the game . But who , ( saue such an vnlucky and vnfortunate Rogue , as my selfe ) could haue lost so faire a set , hauing such store of sound Trumpes , and other good Cardes in my hand ? But I had wonderfull crosse-Carding , and euery tricke that I plaid , fell out to the worst ; so that , No es todo façil , quant o lo pareçe ; A man may be deceiu'd , when he thinkes Prouerb . himselfe most sure . Vertue will trip vp the heeles of Vice , and winne the Goale away from him , play he neuer so cunningly ; Nor is there any thing in the world , that can make a vertuous woman to spot her honour .

When this Gentlewoman vnderstood , what had passed betwixt my selfe and her seruant , she began to deuise with her selfe , how she might be reuenged on vs both , without any hurt to her selfe , but as much preiudice as might be , both to my person , and the plot that was laid betweene vs , for the effecting of my Lords desires . And this she did the rather . for that she saw , that her waiting-Gentlewoman , for my sake , did so earnestly sollicite this cause , and that for my interest , and to doe me a pleasure , she did follow this businesse with all care and diligence , taking her fit times to put her often in minde thereof , not suffring a Card to passe without a Vic , and some-times making The wickednes of some seruants . many false ones , vsing many other tricks , as she was well skill'd in them , and knew handsomely how to put them home : Insomuch , that when this honourable Matrone saw , she could not be in quiet for her , but was thus hardly set vpon in her owne house , and barked at abroad in the street by a company of malicious mouthes , she made no Vociferations , nor Out-cryes , no squeamish replies , no cunning impostures , which some women vse to doe , for to qualifie their honestie , that vnder that shield , they may euer after the more safely offend . For , an honest woman will , by honest meanes , manage her affaires ; not beating the ayre with her clapper , nor ringing out the bell that hangs in her mouth , so loud , that all men may heare the sound thereof , and censure her accordingly , and giue euery one occasion thereby to construe her Actions , as they list themselues . For in regard the good are the fewest , the most doe iudge amisse : And the reason of this ill is , because they themselues bee ill . And this common voyce choaketh a good name , as your Tares doe come .

Now , as this Gentle-woman was a Romane , so did she performe a Romane Act. She knowing , that we went about to worke her ouerthrow , she wisely The discreet carriage of a woman tempted to ●…dnesse . sought to preuent it , feigning her selfe to be somewhat touched with Loues passion , and that she was now vpon the point of yeelding , if not wholly ouercome .

One day , when as her Maid was making of her ready , and was instant with her in this businesse , looking vpon her with a smiling and cheerefull countenance , she said vnto her , Nicoleta , ( for so was she called ) I assure thee , that if thou hadst not wrought vpon me , vsing so many strange inuentions , and hadst not spent so many elaborate and well studied words in this suit of thine , thou hadst e're this made that will of mine to yeeld , which hath hitherto stood out so long . For I wish well vnto Guzman , and approue his discreet proceeding in this businesse . Besides , his Master is of that merit , that any woman whatsoeuer , be she of neuer so honourable qualitie , without being so much sollicited , as I haue beene , ought to imbrace his loue and friendship , and offer her seruice vnto him . But as thou thy selfe both knowest , and seest , I doe not know how it will be possible , that this our Treaty shall be secure from scandalous tongues , being that now vpon no iust cause giuen , and I for my part hauing as yet yeelded no consent vnto that , which perhaps I so much desire , that is whispered already in euery corner , nay thorow all Rome , which neither in mine owne house , nor with thee , ( which canst only be the instrument of our pleasures ) did I euer yet communicate . And since it is now come to this passe , that the popular voyce runneth on with so great libertie , and that I am not able any longer to hold out in withstanding the loue of this noble Gentleman , all that I will intreat at thy hands , is ; that thou wilt dispose and order it , with the greatest secrecie that may be . Speake therefore to Guzman , that he waite and attend here-abouts for some few nights , for I will finde opportunitie some one night or other , to giue him entrance , that I may see him , and talke with him concerning the carriage of our loues .

Nicoleta fell downe vpon her knees to the ground , not knowing , which she should kisse first , her feet or her hands , with a face set all on fire with too much ioy : for a great while together , she neuer left giuing of her thankes , qualifying the easinesse of effecting it , and disgracefully laying open the faults of her old Master . Then did she reduce vnto her remembrance those former distastes , which she had receiued from him ; in what wretched estate , through his miserie , she liu'd in ; his base kinde of carriage , and what drie fodderings he did giue her , and all , that she might incourage her the more to goe brauely on in this her resolution , which she did simply beleeue , she had now entred into .

Hereupon she came forth-with flying vnto me , flinging her armes abroad , and strongly twining them about my necke , she claspt me as hard as she could for her life , demanding a a A reward for good newes . Albriçias at my hands . Which when she had receiued , she would relate vnto me what had past betweene her and her Mistresse . I tooke her by the hand , leading her along with me , ( as those that carry with them the spoyles and trophees of some famous victorie ) into my Masters withdrawing Chamber , where , with a great deale of ioy wee celebrate this gladsome newes ; plotting and contriuing with our selues touching the houre , how and where I might best finde entrance to speake with Fabia . And my Master giuing to Nicoleta a little Purse which he had in his Pocket , cramm'd with Spanish Pistolets , she made as if she were vnwilling to take them of him , but did not all this while cloze her fist , nor pull backe her hand , but out of modestie held it betweene forward and backward like a Phisician , when he is offred more then his fees , and with a iocund smile , gaue him thankes for this his courteous liberalitie ; and with this , she tooke her leaue both of him and me . But my Master continued with me , rendring me an account of his loue , and I giuing him the Para-bien thereof , in which kinde of discourse , and the like , we spent all that Euening . And when it was night , at the appointed houre , I tooke vp my standing , gaue the watch-word , and made such signes , as were ordred betweene vs , but neither that night , nor some three or foure more following , could this agreement made betweene vs , take effect .

One day amongst the rest , there hapned to fall a small , but withall a shrewd driuing raine , wherein at my wonted houre I was to make my accustomed Prouerb . walke , being dabbled ( as they say ) vp a a Con lodos , hasta la cinta . to the girdle . I came thither reasonable well wet , the night being very darke , which suited not amisse with my fortunes . It was my hap ( but would to God it had neuer hapned ) to haue the end of my desires . And for that , in things of interest , and matters that concerne our pleasure and content , it importeth much , to cast off all feare , and to vndergoe all difficulties with a daring resolution , I did shew more courage at that time , then became discretion , in that I was so forward to come to the Call , beating my fore-head against the Walls and corners of the house , when the raine powred downe on my head from heauen , and my feet stood vp to the ankles in durt . As soone as I had giuen the signe , it was knowne who was there , yet notwithstanding they made me to waite a good while in the raine , till I was so thorow-wet , that the water that came in at my Pole , dropt out at my knees , and went guttring downe into my shooes : and then at last , after I had beene a long time in this cold bath , they called vnto me , and willed me to haue the patience to stay yet a little longer .

In the end , when all my cloathes and my selfe were dung-wet , and that I had not a drie thred about me , I might perceiue the doore to open very softly , and Nicoleta to call vnto mee . And then ( mee thought ) that very breath which came from that voyce , brought that comfortable heate with it , that I was thorow-drie all ouer on the sudden . Now did I no more thinke on my fore-passed troubles , being cheered vp with the sight of the (a) Fregonçilla (b) A Maid seruant , that washes and starches , and does the like seruices of keeping all things cleane . Muget de buen fregado . La dishonesta que se refriega con todos . Couarruuias . p. 413. of my soule , and the comfortable hope of inioying the beloued Fabia . Nicoleta and I exchanged but a few words ; for she had scarce bid mee welcome , when lo , her Mistresse came downe , and calling to her seruant , said ; Doe you heare ( Nicoleta ? ) Get you vp , and see what your Master is a doing , and if he chance to aske for me , come and call me , whilest I in the meane-while stay talking here with Sennor Guzman .

Now , all this interim we were in the darke , so that we could scarce discerne one another , and if we did , it was as much as possibly we could doe . Then did she begin to question me concerning my health , and how it was with me , as if she had seemed to wish very well vnto me , or as if my welfare had beene a matter of importance , and much to her contentment . I replyde vnto her with the like demand . That compliment performed , I deliuered her a large message from my Master , in acknowledgement of those many thankes which he did owe vnto her , for the vndeserued fauours which she had vouchsafed to shew vnto him , and how great a seruant hee was of hers , inlarging this Theame with an elegant Oration , which I had studied of purpose only to this end . But before I was come to the conclusion thereof , and when I was in the greatest force of this Argument , and my words began to gather strength for the gaining of her good will , I could not fasten her farther attention , nor like Waxe , worke her as I would ; because she seeming to be amazed and startled with some sudden perturbation , abruptly said vnto me :

Sennor Guzman , as you loue my life , let mee intreat you to hold me excused ; for with a conceiued feare , that at this present instant hath seazed Guzman notably mocked by Fabia : And in what manner . vpon mee , me thinkes , euery bodies eye is vpon mee , all in the house watch and obserue me . And therefore for Gods sake , let me intreat you to enter in heere this way , and there right ouer against you , you shall finde a lodging Chamber , get you quickly into that , and tarry there till I haue giuen a turne or two about the house , to see if the coast bee cleere , and all my people safe , and I shall presently returne againe vnto you ; but I pray haue an especiall care in the meane while , that you stand still , and make not any the least noise in the world . I gaue credit vnto her , and went straight on as she had directed mee , and thinking that I had gone athwart a little open entry , making more haste then good speed , I lighted ere I was aware , into a huge The Spanish word , is patio . la parte de la casa des cubierta . Couarru . verb. Patio . beastly Hog-sty , that stood in a filthy durty Court , where I had no sooner gone some two or three steps , but I stumbled ( through too much haste ) vpon a great dung mixen , and fell with my head iust against the wall , giuing my selfe such a sound knocke , that I lay there for a while senselesse . But with that little life that was left me , by little and little I came to my selfe againe , and scrambling vp as well as I could , I went groping along the walles with my hands ( as children doe that play at Blind-man-buffe ) to see if I could finde out this appointed Chamber : but I could finde no other out-let , saue that whereby I had made my entrance . I rounded it once againe , imagining with my selfe , that by reason of my new receiued blow , I could not haply meet with it so vpon the sudden .

And wandring thus vp and downe this Maze , it was my hap to light vpon a little narrow Lane , as it were , whereat there was no going forth , hauing a house of Office at the end of it , ill couered , and that not wholly neither ouer-head , where was onely the t 'one halfe of an old broken great Pitcher , which was full of Ordure , beeing fixed fast to the ground , and beastly berayd round about , yeelding no very sweet sent , whereby I began to coniecture the danger I was in , and to consider with my selfe the many mis-fortunes that had befalne me .

Well , when I saw how the world went , I sought to get out where I came in : but I found the doore was shut fast vpon mee , and that there was no hope of getting forth . It rained extremely , and showred downe so fast vpon me , that I was forced to shelter my selfe vnder that poore miserable old ruinous open , I cannot tell whether I should tearme it rather Houell , then House , standing vp to the knees in durt , whose perfume was none of the pleasingest .

There did I passe ouer the remainder of that night , which was farre worse , then that I indured at Toledo , and of no lesse perill to my person , then These two misfortunes of his are mentioned in the first Part. that which I was put to in the house of the proud Genoues , my kinsman , Nor was it onely the falling of the raine , that did now afflict mee , which came not drizling or mizling downe vpon mee ; but with a full and open gutter , and when at least , with drops as bigge as Pease . But I beganne to thinke with my selfe what should become of mee ; for I could not but imagine , that she that had made that Mouse-trap for me ouer-night , would the next morning deliuer me ouer to the Cat.

After this conceit had runne a while in my head , I entred into other discourses , wherewith I might comfort my selfe , saying ; Free me ( O God ) from the stormy blustring Northerne windes of this tempestuous night , and giue me leaue to escape with life till it be day , that when the Master of the Ship shall finde mee heere , all that I will say vnto him , shall be , that his Maid brought me hither , and that I am her husband . For it would be the lesser harme vnto mee of the two , to be married vnto her , then to see my bones marr'd with torment , to make mee to confesse what I made there ; and I would rather seeke to content them with this answere , then that they should kill me , and bury me afterwards in this stinking Church-yard , and so end my life in this miserable manner .

Thus I went beating my brai●…es about , discussing to and fro , what would be the issue in the end of this businesse ; when lo , anon after two of the clocke in the morning ; I perceiued that the doore was opened ; wherewith all the misery that I had suffered , was turned into ioy ; and flowers of comfort , thinking that Fabia was now returned . But when I came to the doore , and found it vnlockt , and no body liuing there-abouts , I beganne to bee more afraid then I was before , and my heart beganne to misgiue me , conceiuing , that behinde some wall or doore of the house , they staid waiting for my comming forth , that they might with more ease and safety rid me of life . I vnsheathed my sword , and taking that in one hand , and my Dagger in the other , I went by little and little , taking notice ( by that poore little mornings light ) of all those steps which I had trod ( which , were not many , nor very hard to bee hit againe ) by which I entred . So that , with more feare , then shame , I got at last to the street doore , which I likewise found was open .

When I had once set my feete vpon the threshold , I opened my eyes , and then plainely perceiued , that what had already past , was in punishment of my ouer-boldnesse ; and albeit this tricke that had beene put vpon mee , was not so easie to be digested , yet this iest might haue falne out far worse . I comforted my selfe as well as I could , looked into my errour , & acknowledged my fault ; and champing vpon these things , as I walked along the streets , I came at last home to our owne house , and opening my Chamber doore , I put off my cloathes , and got me in betweene the Blankets to recouer some heat , which through the waters and the windes I had lost .

In this manner did I lye , till it was about ten a clocke in the morning , tumbling and tossing , not being able for very shame to fall asleepe , thinking and deuising with my selfe , what answere I should make vnto my Master . For if I should deale plainely and truely with him , and acquaint him with the whole passage of this businesse , it would be a great affront vnto mee , and that I should be plaid vpon euery moment with whole Vollies of iests , and moue euen the very children of the street to scoffe and laugh at me . And Prouerb . to deny it , and intertaine his Lordship with vaine and idle hopes , me thought that likewise was not fitting . For Nicoleta had already recouered her Albriçias , and was well rewarded for her good newes ; and therefore this might seeme vnto him to bee a meere inuention to defeat him of his money . a a Todo lo veo matas , y por rozar . Del negoçio , que no esta bien compuesto , y tiene muchos inconuenientes . Couarru . verb. Ma●…a . Todos eran matas , por rozar . All the fat I saw , was in the fire ; and that this businesse did not goe on well and handsomely , but had many inconueniences in it ; it went ill on the one side , and worse on the other . Which way so euer I sought to winde me , was but a b b Prouerb . Saltar de la sarten , y dar en las brasas . leaping out of the Frying Pan into the fire .

And whilest I was thus musing with my selfe , how I might inuent some meanes to set all right , one of the seruants of the house came knocking at my doore , and told mee , that my Lord would haue me come to him . O wretched and vnfortunate man that I am ( said I to my selfe ) what shall I doe ? For they haue now found me with my c c Prou. Traer las manos en la masa . Andar metido en algun negocio . finger in the Creame-Pot ; they haue taken mee in the manner , the theft is discouered , I am put to my shifts , and must answere for my selfe as well as I can . Coragio then ( quoth I ) Coragio , Guzman ! When were thy spirits wont to faile thee in this manner ? When wert thou euer as yet put to that plunge , from which at length thou didst not fairely come off ? The Sunne is as yet clouded ; and Time will discouer the true path . And who tooke thee by night out of the yard , will bring thee as well out of my Lords with-drawing roome .

Well , I got mee vp , shifted my cloathes , and put on a fresh sute , the best that I had ; and being then as fine and as gallant , as if no such disaster had hapned vnto mee ; I hy'de mee vp vnto my Lord , who expected my comming , and had no sooner seene me●… , but presently askt mee , how the world went , and how chanced it , that I had no sooner come to giue an account of what had past betwixt Fabia , and my selfe ? I told him ; That they made mee stay waiting in the street vntill it was midnight , expecting a faire birth of this businesse , but it prou'd in the end to bee a shitten-ars'd Girle ; so that I was dismist with a non licet ; telling me , that she could not possibly either speake with mee , or open the doore .

I also then signified vnto him , that I would goe and lye downe a while vpon my bed , to see if I could take some rest , for I did not finde my selfe halfe well . Hee gaue me leaue so to doe . Where-vpon , I went to my Chamber , put off my cloathes , got mee to bed , and there fell to my victuals , where I remained till it was almost night , hatching a thousand conceits in my head , wasting my wits ; and Limbeking my braines , without drawing any iuice or substance thence at all . And because , what in regard of my rage and anger , as also the sundry thoughts and imaginations that troubled my minde , I was not able to take any rest on either side , but lay tumbling from t 'one to t'other ; If I lay on my backe , I straight-way waxed weary ; if I sate vp in my bed , my Hips were too feeble to beare vp my bodie . Wherevpon , I resolued with my selfe to rise . And I had no sooner taken my cloathes into my hands , and put my feet out of my bed , but one of the Groomes of the Stable came into my Chamber , and told mee ; Sennor Guzman ; There are some pretty Wenches beneath at the staires foot which inquire for you , and stay waiting your comming in the Portall within the gate . Apocks vpon them , quoth I : What haue I to doe with them ? The Diuell take them for mee . Goe downe , and either bid them goe to the Stewes , or else tell them , that I am not within . For I imagined with my selfe , that all Rome by this time had rung of my disgrace , and that these were some roguish harlotries , that came to laugh and scoffe at mee , and to make themselues merry with my mis-fortunes . I was very iealous , that they came of purpose to play the Wags with mee , and therefore willed him to dismisse them : and so they went their wayes .

That night my Master willed me to continue my wonted Station . I told him , that I found my selfe not halfe well ; wherevpon he aduised mee to get mee betimes to my lodging , and that I should call for any thing that I wanted ; and if need were , he would send a Physician vnto mee . I kist his hands , thanking him in the best fashion I could , for this his great fauour and loue towards mee ; and got mee forthwith to my lodging , where I remained retired , and all alone , as I had done the rest of that day .

The next morning , I was no sooner vp , but I receiued a Letter from my Nicoleta , complaining of mee , that hauing come to visit mee the day before , I would not bee spoken withall , nor giue her notice of that , which had past the other night betwixt my selfe and her Mistresse , and what great businesse I had , that I did not round that street the next night following , telling mee that shee had waited there for my comming , till it was after mid-night .

Vnto these , she added some other words , which lest me no lesse perplexed , then confounded . And that I might cleere all doubts , I wrote her an answere ; telling her , that I would not faile sometimes that Euening to come and visit her in the back Lane , that was behinde the house . For Fabia's house stood as it were betweene two streetes ; on the back-side whereof , right against the principall gate , was a little Posterne doore , and ouer that a pretty little lodging Chamber , with one little window belonging vnto it , from whence Nicoleta might very conueniently talke vnto me euen in the day time , for that the Lane was little frequented , as being scarce passable , for that it was very narrow , and full of durt and mire . And euen then at that time , it was so bad and so foule , that very hardly and with much adoe , ( considering the late raine ) could I get to that place , where I was to speake with Nicoleta .

Well , when I was come thither , and she ready to receiue me , shee began to aske mee ; what was become of me ? What great occasions did hinder me , that I had not come and seene her the night before ? And if not for her , yet for her Mistresses sake , I might haue taken that paines . She formed many complaints against me , accusing the inconstancie of Men , who made loue vnto Women , not so much for any good affection that they bore them , as The inconstancie of idle young men . to get the conquest , and Mastery of them ; And when they had gotten what they desired , and receiued some Pledge from them , they did quickly slight them , if not wholly forget them .

By this , as likewise by that profession , which she made of her loue vnto me , I knew her innocencie , and Fabia's subtiltie , who went about to deceiue vs both . Thereupon I told her ; My Nicoleta , thou art quite out of the way , and so mightily deceiued , as no woman can bee more . For I would haue thee to know , that thy Mistresse hath play'd the Iacke with vs both . Then I vp and told her all that had befalne me , and how vilely she had vs'd me . Shee blest her selfe , crossing and crossing her selfe ouer and ouer , thinking it to be a thing impossible . I stood thus talking with her , being gallantly clad , and in my best brauery , strutting my legs abroad , stretching out my necke , and discoursing of my misfortunes , being carelesse of that present disgrace , which my euill fortune had too neere at hand for me . For it so fell out , that whilest I was thus discoursing with her , by that little Posterne ; ( thorow which there was a way to goe in and out to the Stable ) it hapned , that there entred in thereat ( whilest the Groomes had led the Horses forth to water , ) a huge big Bore ; this Bore one of the Groomes found nuzzeling in the litter , which he had made ready for his Horses , turning it topsie-turuy , and scattering it all abroad the Stable . He being much moued thereat , tooke vp a great bat in his hand , and belaboured his backe and sides , as hard as he could lay on for his life . It was a fat rogue and a great ; and like a Bull that is bayted , came running forth , as hard as he could driue . And for that these kinde of beasts , either out of custome , or nature , vse to runne alwayes fore-right , and seldome or neuer turne aside , he came directly vpon me , and tooke me so on the sudden , that I could by no meanes auoyd him , and perforce made his way iust betweene my legs ; so that I rode as it were a-stride on horse-backe , but the cleane contrary way ; and to keepe my selfe from falling , I tooke hold on his tayle with both my hands , vsing that in stead of a Bridle , which I held as fast as possibly I could . I was not able all this while to recouer my selfe , and had my life laine vpon it , I knew not for the present how to quit my selfe handsomely from his backe : and whilest I was deuising with my selfe how I might come fairely off , he ranne with me thorow the midst of a durtie puddle , that was nothing but myre and filth , so that for to saue my selfe from falling , and that he might the better beare me thorow the durt , I was forced to let goe his taile , and to claspe my armes about the sides of him , with all the might and force I could . And as if we had playd at binding of barrels , or a a Iuego de ninnos . à punt a con cabeça , giuing him many a rap at the wrong doore , flinging vp his snout , and huffing and puffing with his nostrils , he carried me ( in spight of my teeth , for I was forced to hold fast , for feare of falling in the durt ) in his hoggish kinde of gallop , some three or foure streets from off that place , grumbling and grunting as he went along , and with his whining and crying , calling the people together to see what he ayld , whilest I perceiuing the shame and danger I was like to runne , fell off from his backe of mine owne accord , not regarding when , or where I should light . And much better had it beene for me , had I done this before in mine owne little durty Lane ; for besides that , I should not haue there receiued so much harme , the disgrace would not haue beene so publike , and I should haue met with a remedie for this mischiefe neerer at hand .

Well , I got me vp as well as I could on my legs , but all bemyr'd , and berayd with durt , being hooted at by the people , and affronted by all the women and children in Rome , my face being all besmeared with durt , and my cloathes from top to toe , all playstered ouer with myre , that I seemed to haue beene throwne out of the belly of some Whale . The people from out their doores and windowes shouted out so loud , and the boyes did so flocke about me , that as one that was out of his wits , and depriued of iudgement , I sought where I might best hide my selfe . At last I spyde out a house hard by , where I thought I should finde some good entertainment . I entred there-into , and made fast the doore , and so barrocadoed my selfe vp close against all that company , that were desirous to see me . But it did not fall out so well with me , as I could haue wisht ; For it is not fit , that any thing a a Al malo , no es justo , suçeder le cosa bien . should succeed well with the wicked . It is a punishment of his fault : and so it fell out with me , by that bad entertainment which I there receiued , as you shall heare more at full in the chapter following .

CHAPTER VI.

Guzman de Alfarache recounteth , how in the house , where-into hee had withdrawne himselfe , to make himselfe cleane , another disgrace befell him , and many other misfortunes . And that which passed afterwards , betweene him and his Lord the Embassadour , with whom hee discoursed of politicke and graue matters .

THe night was now darke , but much more my heart . Euery house was full of lights , but my sad soule was fuller of darkenesse . I did not weigh and consider with my selfe , that it was now late , nor that the Master of the house was not willing that I should stay there , but reuiling me with odious tearmes , sought to driue me out with euill language , thinking euery houre a yeere , till he had thrust me out of doores . For , he was Guzman makes euery one suspicious of him . iealous of me , and began to suspect , that this was but some tricke or stratagem of mine owne plotting , hauing taken hold on that occasion to get into his house , and to bring my purpose more easily to passe . Nor was this my honest Gentleman much out of the way . For the Gentle-woman his wife wore the Breeches , she was Master of the house , a friend to her owne will and pleasure , very b b The Spanish word●… , Serrada Sienes . I would be glad 〈◊〉 be informed of the propriety of this phrase , if a●… can render it better . head-strong , and not sure of foot . So that it was no wonder that her husband should see Visions , and dreame of strange apparitions , taking euery shadow to be some fearefull ghost , and conceiuing , ( out of his iealous humour ) that all the world went about to coozen him . So that euery the least apprehension ( though of neuer so farre-fetcht a supposition ) made him presently to take the Allarme . Whereupon , he no sooner saw me within his doores , but he called all his people about him , and leauing me all alone in the outward Porch to the great Gate , would not suffer his seruants to doe me so much kindenesse , as to afford me a bucket of water to wash my selfe withall . So that I ( poore man ) with my cloathes all to be-myrd , my hands all to be-durted , and my face so fouly besmear'd , that there was not one white spot to be seene , I went intertaining my going forth with a great deale of feare , lest some might chance to be still waiting at the gate to looke vpon this my new Liuery , which might better beare the name of Leprosie . And for that they , who beheld this my misfortune , were not a few , the company Guzman laughed at by common people . increasing , and standing in a round thicke together , they related it afresh to them that were newly come into their companie ; and for that they had a generall dislike of me , they detained all that past by , relating vnto them the disgrace that had befalne me , whereat they all laughed out aloud , making great signes and tokens of ioy . And it may be , that most of them had reason so to do ; and by this their reioycing , did reuenge them-selues of those wrongs , which they had heretofore receiued from me . There might you see that verified of me , which is commonly sung vp and downe the streets . Mas enemigos , que amigos , tienen Romance . Su cuerpo cercado ; Dizen vnos , que lo entierren , Y otros , que no sea enterrado . More foes then friends , his body haue Incompast round about ; Some crie , to put it in the graue , And some , t' shall lye without .

The street was full of men and boyes , which did persecute mee with Guzman hated and persecuted . shrill shoutes , and lowd cryes , calling in a sharpe and high key ; Thrust him out ; Thrust him out ; Why doe yee let this foule beast abide with you ? put out this same pickled pigge amongst vs . O these base Raskals , how had they almost made mee to lose my patience , and my iudgement ! There were some honest folke amongst them , that tooke part with mee ; and all those that were such as I was , shew'd themselues on my side . These sought to defend me from their fury , labouring to pacifie that rude rabble with threats and menaces ; for they were growne so shamelesse , and so impudent , that they began to throw stones against the gate , being very desirous to haue me come forth amongst them .

But I neither blame them , nor excuse my selfe . For I would haue done Curiositie admits no respect . the like my selfe , vpon the same occasion , against mine owne father . For , those things of curiositie , which doe not ( like Shroue-tide ) come once a yeere , I doe not hold it any great excesse to bee desirous to see them . And I assure thee ( nor doe I speake this , to make the matter seeme more then it is ) that if for to make profit , I would haue suffered my selfe to bee seene , I might by this meanes haue got a good summe of money ; For I was nothing all ouer , but a meere lumpe of durt , hauing like your Negro's ; no more white about mee to be seene , saue onely my eyes , and teeth ; this mis-fortune befalling me in the most liquid kennell , and rottennest mixen that was in all the street .

True it is , that with the knife that belonged to my Sword , I scrap't away as much of it as I could , but all was but as a thing of nothing , being either little or nothing the better ; for the myre , by reason of its liquidnesse , had soked it selfe quite thorow my cloathes , so that they remained as wet about me , as if they had beene steeped in some bath . And I held it some happinesse vnto me in this my misery , that I did not goe dropping through the streets , like a basket of Buck-cloathes , when they are taken Those that are vnfortunate , seek to sh●…n the sight of all men . Prouerb . from the washing-Bole , and carried forth to be dryed in the Sunne .

In this pittifull manner , it being now late , and all the people gone , I sneaked out in that lamentable pickle , as I would haue wisht them to haue beene in , who tooke most pleasure therein . If there bee happinesse in vnhappinesse , in regard of the comfort which we receiue from thence ; this day it should seeme that fortune did play the wanton , and went sporting her selfe at the juego de Cannas with m●… ; for , though shee had dis-fauour'd me with these the like troubles , that you haue heard ; yet did shee afterward assist mee with the night ; yea , and with such a darke night , that the people went their way , giuing me leaue to depart thence , sound , safe , and free , from the clamour of the boyes and children , which stayd watching for mee . I got me forth , throwing my Cloake ouer my face , without being knowne by any , and making large strides , seeking ( if it were possible ) to fly from my selfe , in regard of that store of durt , and that euill sauour which I bare about me in my cloathes . But this could not be dissembled ; for which way so-euer I went , I left some signe thereof behinde mee , beside the heat of the sent , which might very well bee followed afarre off , it was so strong . And none that past by mee , would turne backe to looke vpon me , because they did suspect no harme . And if any did chance to finde fault with me , others would excuse me , and say ; Let the poore fellow alone , it is but a little slipperinesse of the Guts , a loosenesse of the Hilts , a little laxatiue oyle that is come from him , which vpon occasion may bee euery mans case , as well as his : He would haue holpe it and he could , and therefore you must pardon him . Others would say ; Inquire no farther into the matter , make no more doe about it , but giue ouer the haunt ; for the Crow a a No putde ser el Cueruo mas negro , que las alas . cannot be blacker , then are his wings . Others , stopping their noses as they went along by me , would cry out Foh ; There hath more store of raine falne , then we were aware of . Others , This Disciplinante must needs haue giuen himselfe some great wound , he stinkes so vildly , ( for they saw mee muffled vp in my Cloake , like those , which come from whipping themselues in the Holy Weeke . ) Let me aduise you , friend , to make all the haste you can , and call quickly for some water , before you begin to swound .

I had matter enough for all of them to worke vpon , and there was not any that past by me , but had a fling at me . And some would not sticke to aske me ; Tell me ( friend ) how sell you a pound of this Waxe ? And others ; What 's the price of your Honey-combes ? And a third ; Sure this must needs be some perfumer or other , since he smels so sweet . I answered them all with silence , and replyde not a word vnto them , by which meanes I past the better along by them , though euer and anon they would bee girding and scoffing at me . But for those that cryde a pocks on mee , and bid the Diuell goe with me , calling me Pole-Cat , and the like stinking names ; mumbling softly to my selfe , as your young Nouices doe their Mattens in a Monasterie , I payd them againe in their owne coyne : And so hanging my head in my bosome , I hy'de me homewards as fast as my durt-loaden legges would carrie me .

That , which did most trouble me , was , to see the Dogges in euery street come barking after me , who the faster I went , did so much the more fiercely set vpon me , and especially your b b The Spanish word is , Gozquejo . A kinde of Dogge , which at first was in great esteeme , when they were brought out of Gothland into Spaine , a Country in Europe , which confineth vpon Denmark and Norway , called in the Almane tongue Gott , from whence came the Gothes , which came into Castile . This race of Dogs is now bastardized , and in a manner lost . So that now your Gozques , are a kinde of Mongrell Curs , which your poore and baser sort of people breed vp and keepe . They are short-legged , long sided & headed , balling and barking at their neighbours , troublesome to your Gallants , and abhorred of theeues . They sleepe all day , and this makes them wake , and barke all night long . And your Tradesmen and Shop-keepers , will rather indure that you should strike his Sonne , then kicke his Dogge . Couarru . verb. Gozque . Mongrell Curres , which followed me close at the heeles , and would now and then giue me a nip at the Calues of my legges . I would faine haue fraid them away , but I durst not , fearing lest by making that defence , greater Dogges and more in number , hearing the noise that they would haue made , would thereby haue been drawne forth of doore , and come mainely running vpon me , and haue torne me ( like another Acteon ) all in pieces .

At last , after these my many mis-fortunes , like a Ship that comes from the West-Indies , beaten at Sea , and rent and torne by Pyrats , I arriu'd safe at Seuill . I was now come to my old home , and being vnseene and vnheard of any , had got me vp to my lodging . And I should haue held it no small happinesse , if I could haue got in as soone as I came to my Chamber doore . I put my hand in my Pocket , to take out the Key , but could not finde it . Then did I feele for it in the other Pocket , but could not meet with it . I cut two or three capers in the ayre , hoping to heare it gingle ; but all was one ; then did I fall a searching of my breeches , to see if happely it had got in betwixt the linings of my Hose ; but the Diuell a Key that was there . I rummaged euery corner about mee that I could suspect it to be in , but all to no purpose . For questionlesse I lost it in that house , whither I had with-drawne my selfe , when I tooke out my Handkerchiefe to wipe my face and my hands . This was a great griefe vnto mee , and did vexe mee more then all the rest ; in which agony and anguish of minde , lifting vp my eyes to Heauen , as a man in desperation , I breathed forth these words of complaint .

Poore , miserable man , as I am ; What shall I doe ? or whither shall I goe ? What will become of mee ? What course shall I take , that my Masters seruants , Guzman laments his misfortune . and other my Companions and fellowes of the house , may not come to the knowledge of this disgrace that hath thus vnluckily befalne mee ? How shall I cloake and dissemble this businesse , that I may not bee made a laughing stocke amongst them ? I may boldly tell all the world besides , that they lye , but I cannot doe so to those of the house , if they should hap to see mee . To others I might deny it , either in part , or in whole , as shall seeme best vnto mee : But here , if they chance to light vpon me , I am openly taken in the manner , the theft found about mee , the cause opened , and my mouth shut , not being able to alledge any thing in mine owne defence , nor can I inuent that Lye , that will bee able to giue them satisfaction , and make good what I shall say in mine owne excuse . Those that enuy my inwardnesse with my Master , will bathe themselues herewith in Rose-water ; it will bee meat and drinke to them , and they will not sticke to call their friends about them ; who , like swarmes of Bees , will fly in presently vpon mee , and come buzzing about mee , to worke my more shame and amazement . I am vtterly vndone , my Barke lyes all a t 'one side , and is ready to bee drowned , because it hath no Pylot to set her vpright , and to steere her in her true course , nor any Master that is able to gouerne her .

With these exclamations ( wretched as I was ) I rent the ayre , and was ready to runne out of my wits : but was not so wise at that time to call to minde , what an ill name I had gotten in Rome , and yet with outcryes and lamentations must thus pittifully bewayle an accident of fortune . O would to God , that ( considering the great troubles of this world ) wee would bee as sensible of the aduersities of the minde , as wee are mooued with the afflictions of the body ! But that doth happen vnto vs , which is wont to befall those , which sweepe all cleane before the doore , and when they haue done , throw the dust into the house . Thus did I stand , making funerall lamentations ouer my mis-fortunes , when lo , there came a thing into my minde , which had hapned some few dayes before , which was of great comfort vnto mee , adding new courage and strength vnto mee against all such accidents as might hereafter succeed vnto mee . And thus it was :

There was a Curtizan of Rome , who caus'd another woman , because The reuenge that a Romane Curtizan tooke of another woman , for being to lauish of her tongue . shee had beene some-what too lauish of her tongue , to bee slasht ouer the face , cutting her athwart the nose , from one cheeke to the other , the cut running equally on either side of her face . And while the Surgeon was a dressing of her , after that hee had giuen her some sixteene or seuenteene stitches , she weeping said ; O what an vnfortunate woman am I ! Gentlemen , let me intreat you for Gods sake , that my Husband may not know of this . A waggish fellow , that stood there by , told her , If this slash had beene vpon your buttocks , as it is vpon your face , it might haply haue been hidden from him ; but seeing there is no Vayle to couer it ; why doe you inioyne vs to keepe it secret ?

In like sort , it seemed simplicitie , and meere foolery in mee , to vse such a deale of nicety in the businesse . And the rather , for that this mischance was publike . And because , ( by reason of the generall knowledge thereof ) it could not bee conceiled , I thought it the best way for mee , to get the Game by the hand , and to speake of it first my selfe , telling as many of it , as I should meet withall , making a iest of it , and recounting the whole Story thereof vnto them , before they should receiue it from some other hand , and so at last come to know what a badde and long voyage I had made . Which if they should haue done , it had beene better for mee , that I had beene out of this miserable world .

Let him indure the title of a badde name , that desires to haue it dye The best way to shake off a nick-name , is to set light by it . Haga nombre de mal nombres quien dessea , que se le cayga presto . quickly . For , with the more violence wee seeke to shake it off , so much the closer it cleaueth vnto vs . Insomuch , that it continueth many times to the fifth generation ; and then those , which succeed them , doe glory and boast themselues thereof , and blazon that for their Armes , which their Ancestors held for an affront . The like hath befalne this my poore booke , which I hauing intituled with the name of a a Obseruatio vitae humanae . Atalaya de la vida humana ; The Watch-Tower of mans life , they haue put the nick-name of b b Picaro , 〈◊〉 a Rogue . Picaro therevpon , and now it is knowne by no other name .

I was much perplexed , and as yet vnresolued what I were best to doe . And for that I thought with my selfe , that in our miseries , there is no other Sanctuary on earth to flye vnto , but those that are our friends ; though I must confesse I had but a few , and amongst those neuer a true one , I held it not amisse , to haue recourse to some one of my Companions , that had profest much loue vnto me , and had made me the fairest showes of friendship .

This being now concluded on , I got me to his lodging , and knockt at his doore , which he presently opened vnto me : where I did remaine , while the locke was ript off from mine . You may conceiue with your selfe in what a wofull case I was , that I durst not sit downe vpon a trunke that was there in the roome , for feare of leauing therein the print of this my errour . This vnhappy Accident could not be kept so secret , but that it must needs be knowne . And it is a miserie , that followes great mens houses , that there is not a seruant therein , that doth not striue and labour all that he can , to flatter and Seruants giuen to flatter their Masters . soothe vp his Lord and Master , although it be with merry iests , and fained tales , when as there is no such matter . For they deale with him , as those that play booty , seeking to serue one anothers turne , vsing all their art and skill to coozen and deceiue him : Whereby euery Master knowes , how and to what end his seruants loue him , and with what affection they serue him . And hee is a kinde of vnfortunate man , and in a miserable and wretched taking , if he thinke to winne them by rigour , and to worke them to loue him for feare . For few or none haue euer beene able to bring this to passe . For the heart of Loue , is gained by loue , and not by rigour . Mans heart , a tender thing . man , is a noble thing , and must be wonne with gentle vsage ; it must not be roughly dealt withall , but stroaked with a smooth and soft hand .

I had scarce shifted my cloathes , and washt my selfe cleane , but that my Master knew I was all bedurted . They had told him in what case I was , but none of them could tell him the cause of it . This was all they could say of me , and so they left me , as they found me ; so that by this meanes , I had a faire white to shoot at , and might make my ayme as I would my selfe . Hee demanded first of one , and then of another , how this came about , but none could informe him farther , then what they had seene .

Afterwards it was told me , ( which was no more then I heard from his owne mouth ) that he conceited with him-selfe , that they had caught me in Fabia's house , and that knowing my tricks , and cunning carriage , they had turned the keele of me vpwards , and had thus trimm'd and pitcht me ouer , as your Sea-men doe your ships : and that I seeking to escape their hands , fell by misfortune into some durty puddle , or filthy dung-hill : Or else , that wrestling and striuing with some of the seruants , that were sent out after me to catch me , they had throwne me downe in the durt , bemoyling mee in that beastly manner , being more willing to doe me shame and reproach , then to take away my life . I likewise at the same time was casting vp my Account with my selfe , making me a a a Haziendo cun̄a del mismo pàlo . Prouerb . wedge out of the same piece of wood , that I might driue this businesse the better , and come home vnto him , by iumping with his conceit , and cleauing the same blocke , that hee had already entred vpon , hoping thereby to giue him the better satisfaction . And though his Cardes and mine were not the same , yet were they both of a sute , and the Trumpe was turn'd vp right for either hand ; and by different b b Prouerb . Por caminos diferentes , y bomos ambos à vn parador . wayes we hapt both to meet at one , and the same place : only wee did differ in this ; that he by his wisdome did coniecture , what was the most likely ; and I , out of a vaine and idle humour , made report of that , which might be least preiudiciall to my reputation . He had all that night beene busie a writing , and making his Dispatches for France ; but laying his Papers awhile aside , out of the great desire that he had to know the truth of the matter , he presently sent for me in . But when I was come , and had presented my selfe vnto him , he said not a word vnto me , till he had retired himselfe into his withdrawing Chamber , and dismissed his seruants , and that we two were all alone .

Then did he begin to aske me , how I came by my fall , and where ? I told him ; that I stood at a neighbours doore , that was right ouer against Fabia's house , watching very diligently , if I could haue the opportunitie to speake with her ; and whilest I was carefully attending this businesse , her Maid Nicoleta came forth , making signes vnto me , that I should quickly come away . And being ouerioyed with this vnexpected good fortune , I would needs crosse the Lane , where the way was worst and foulest , ( because I would not lose time in going about by that which was the cleaner ) fetching a nimble leape , thinking to pitch sure with my foot vpon a stone , that was not so firmely laid as it should haue beene , it tottred aside , and so my foot slipt ; I sought to recouer my selfe , but could not , and so fell into the durt , where I was most pittifully bemyred . Whereupon , Nicoleta , the people that passed by , beginning to flocke about me , with-drew her selfe , and went in . So that I was inforced to come home , without effecting what I went for ; Which did much more grieue me then my fall . But all things doe not alwayes fall out as we would haue them . He then said vnto me , I suffer more in this , then thy selfe . The harme is more mine , then thine .

This businesse ( Guzmanillo ) goes not luckily along with thee . It was a worke of darkenesse , thou wentst about it late in the Euening , in an vnfortunate houre , and vpon a Tuesday : this disgrace could not haue befalne thee , in any mans seruice , but mine , nor haue lighted so vnluckily vpon any but my selfe , such is my misfortune .

Whereunto I reply'd ; I would not that your Lordship should make this ill construction to your selfe , nor would I haue you to reckon this in the number ; but I am rather perswaded , that it would haue beene worse with vs , if this mis-fortune had not befalne me . For we haue a Prouerb in Castile ; a a Prouerb . Que breme vn pie , quiças por mejor . I brake my legge , and it may be , it was all for the best . And I am the bolder to tell you so , for that her Husband was at that time at home in the house , and therefore it makes me to suspect , that there was some trap laid for me , and that I was called into some ill end ; but suppose it were otherwise , and that the winde had blowne faire in the Poope , and that I had entred into the Hauen ; say , that the seruants of the house should either haue spy'd me , or ouer-heard me talking with their Mistresse , what doth your Excellencie thinke , would then haue become of me ? Assure your selfe , they would haue cudgell'd me soundly , and haue vs'd me so hardly , that I should not haue scap't their fingers , till they had broken all my bones , and sent me home without a nose . For my so often rounding of that house , hath caused some notice to be taken thereof ; and albeit that some doe thinke that I only doe it for Nicoleta's sake , yet many , that doe not know the good loue that is betweene vs , are apt to conceiue the worst . And I haue of late obserued , that the good old man , Don Beltran , hath lookt askew vpon me , as if he were not well pleased with me . Hee was wont heretofore to speake kindely vnto me , asking my opinion concerning the Ladyes , and Gentlewomen of this Court , and if I knew of any good Spanish ware in that kinde ; but now he passes along by me , not so much as once offring to speake to me : and if I put off my Hat and salute him , he lookes another way , as if he did not see me , and goes along by me like a logge , without any life or motion towards me at all .

This was the effect of that which I then said vnto him ; my Master all this while being very attentiue vnto me , and euer and anon knitting his brow , and casting vp his eyes , whereby I knew , that I had stung him , and made him to sit musing , as one that had beene amazed vpon the report of some strange and sudden accident . I saw all his Cardes , and knew what gam●… he had in his hand , and how he would play it , and found by him , that he was afraid both of his reputation , and his person , and that it would be little for his honour , if any disgrace should befall him in that house , in regard it was one of the greatest , and the noblest allyed in all that Citie . I taking hold of this occasion , came in a little closer vnto him , helping to turne the Key about , when I saw which way it was winding ; and so thinking it fit to strike the Iron whilest it was hot , prosecuting my purpose , I spake thus vnto him ; There is not any thing now in this world , that can worke astonishment in mee , nor make me to abate one haire of my courage ; for I am well acquainted with misfortunes , know how farre Disgrace can throw the barre , and the vtmost harme she could doe me . For he that shall tread in my steps , and runne those courses that I haue done , shall hazard both the losse of his life , and honour . But I haue armed myselfe with patience , to indure any misfortune whatsoeuer . I haue learned long agoe couragiously to suffer and abide the changes of Fortune with an vndaunted minde , for I alwayes suspect the worst , looking From Fortune , we are to suspect the worst . for the hardest measure she can giue me , and preuent her better vsage , by expecting no good at her hands . Her effects are neuer so great , as are her threatnings ; and if I should haue beene cowed with them , they would haue followed me still close at the heeles , as the Greyhound doth the Hare , and neuer giue mee ouer , as long as shee could wagge her taile , or fetch her breath

No great heed is to be giuen to that which hath succeeded in this businesse , nor that I entred into it vpon a Tuesday ; For I am neither wedded to superstitions , nor thinke that your Lordship is descended of the House of the b b Tuesday obserued to haue beene an vnfortunate day to the house of the Mendoças . Mendoças , that you should be taken with these vaine and idle toyes of the Spaniards , as if all other dayes had a particular priuiledge , and Tuesday only had receiu'd a curse from heauen . And if Fortune should fall vpon me , with all the forces she can make , come what can come vnto me , be it neuer so bad , all her rigorous dealing towards me , shall not wring one word out of my mouth , that shall be preiudiciall to any man . Your Excellencie may doe well to dissemble this businesse , and to seeme to take no notice of what hath past , nor to care a pinne for it . For mine owne part , I shall euer truly serue you to the death , fall backe , fall edge , hap what will hap , all is one to me . Yet withall , true it is , and I shall make bold to tell you so , that if the Case were mine , as it is yours , I would not only desist there-fro , considering how crosse things goe ; for of a thousand dayes , I cannot get one day of Audience ; so that it is likely to proue an endlesse piece of worke , and an immortall kinde of businesse , like vnto that of your a a Mayorasgo , is the heire of a house . Mayorasgos , or Primo-genitureship , which your fathers settle vpon their eldest sonnes , but shall not come to inioy their estate , till they be dead . Besides , I may not well set my foot any more in those parts , by reason that my haunting of that place is now generally noted , and some sticke not to talke too liberally of it .

There are not wanting in Rome as good , and better ware then she , which may be had with lesse danger , at an easier rate , and giue your Lordship more content , and lesse trouble . I know not how it is with others , but my loue is not so feruent , as to loue for loue , but for fashion sake to laugh and be merry , and to make sport , as they vse to doe in my countrie . I am like a Melon-mongers Knife , cutting here a slice , and there a slice , now at this corner , then at that , changing and altering my markes , rouing sometimes at one , sometimes at another , here to day ( as they say ) and to morrow in France . I take thought for nothing , nor am I wedded to my will in any thing , nor am I constant in my purposes , especially in matters of loue . For if one will not , another will . I eate , and sleepe at my due houres ; I sigh not , when I am out of my Mistresses sight , but in her presence , I fetch many a grieuous groane , and vtter my complaints . And this is that mill , where-with I grinde . But your Excellencie runn's a cleane contrary course . For you doe all that you doe , with a great deale of grauitie , and with a Lordly kinde of carriage and greatnesse . And being a great and powerfull man , you haue those things in chase , which are hardest to be atchieued , and like the Falcon flye at the Hearne , making wing after her , till she be quite out of sight ; pursuing your game to the vtmost you are able , cost it what it will cost , or come what will come of it , you care not . For as you haue force and strength to make resistance , so you accommodate all things handsomely by your discretion and wisdome ; you haue a good staffe to trust to ; and good legges to beare you vp .

You doe not well vnderstand ( Guzmanillo ) what you say , said my Master vnto mee ; but is rather all quite contrary to that , which thou hast spoken . For there is nothing now at this present more preiudiciall , nor more noted and obserued , then any the least spot or weakenesse in a publike Euery little spot , a foule blemish in a publike person . person . For men of my qualitie are bound to weare such cloathes as befit such Ministers , and not as shall fit best with our owne fancy . Otherwise , wee shall bee taxed by those that cast an eye vpon them . And euery little indecencie in them , turnes to a staine at least , if not a foule blot . A little breath ( you know ) will make the biggest Organs goe . And your greatest men sound lowdest in the eares of the world , when the noise of their actions are blowne abroad by the bellowes of the peoples breath . And I swear●… vnto thee , that if I had not ingaged my selfe by my word , and more particularly im-pawned my credit to Nicoleta , by giuing my faithfull promise , that I would come and visit Fabia in person ( besides it would grieue mee , to bee accounted inconstant , or cowardly , blaming mee of lightnesse , that my loue should be like that of children , or like water in a Siue , or that I went about but to try of what metall she was made , and then to laugh and scoffe at her coozening of both her and my selfe of these our good hopes , and that it should bee said of mee , that I did then turne tayle , when I might haue seazed on my game , and had the Partridge in foote , which I might haue trussed , if I would my selfe ) I would not haue car'd a button . Besides , being ( as thou saist ) that this businesse goes on so slowly , and so coldly , I doe not finde my selfe so fast intangled in her loue , and so transported with passion , that I doe not vnderstand and consider with my selfe , that shee hath a husband , that is one of the principall , and chiefest in Rome , rich , and noble , out of which respect wee ought to walke very warily , as professing to haue some honourable beginning , and not to dis-honour the house wee come of , for which cause I ought to keepe a good Decorum , without doing wrong or iniury to any . And although shee be young and faire , ( and as such a one obliged to take hold on those faire occasions that are offered ) yet ought I not to follow her blandishments , and perhaps to my too great cost , but with a great deale of caution and heed ; as shall best stand with that duty which I owe to my noblenesse of bloud , and to the honour of their house and kindred .

Many times , without due consideration , wee vn-aduisedly will see a mans game , and vpon badde Cards ( though wee haue little reason for it ) set vp our rest , and when wee are once in , we cannot giue ouer the Vye , vnlesse wee will be accounted simple , cowardly , and weake .

But since that on our part , wee haue vsed all possible diligencies , and that they preuaile so little , and cost vs so much , ( as the case standeth now with the honour of this Gentle-woman ; ) if my sensuall appetite , like Gunne-powder , hath with its fire scorched , if not burnt my reason , by acknowledging now the ill , which I haue taken in hand , that furie is now ouer-past , and prostrating my selfe on the earth , I confesse my fault . I will goe no more ( as thou sayst ) following of that , which flyeth from mee . But with this Lady , which was in a manner in my hands , I will deale with her , as doth the generous Hawke , by letting this Bird goe ; by which noblenesse of mine , that ill name shall bee quite buried vnder-ground , which for my sake hath beene raised of her ; taking therein the best course that I can , that may make most for both our reputations .

This was that hee said vnto mee . And mee thought that this his resolution was my saluation . For therein , I found the Paradise of my desires opened vnto mee ; and praising this his good purpose , the issue was the easier , not so much for his intention , as for my reputation . And therefore I said vnto him , Your Excellencie shall herein doe like your selfe , and proceed in that which you both say , and doe , with that correspondencie , which is most agreeable to your wisedome . For albeit it bee a great happinesse , to obtaine that which wee desire ; yet I hold it a greater , not to desire that , which our sensualitie suggesteth vnto vs ; much lesse , if it incite vs to the hurt of others , and more especially towards persons of qualitie .

This is a Christian consideration , and a Daughter worthy the birth of your Lordships braine ; and therefore fit that you should father it , and not cast it off . And for the manner how you shall come off from this businesse , leaue that to me . For a faithfull seruant , although for to maintaine himselfe in his Masters loue and fauour , hee is wont to giue a heat vnto that What a serua●… ought to doe to maintaine himselfe in his Masters fauour . appetite which he findes to bee in him , yet is he bound , when hee shall see this humour corrected in him , to turne the reines , incouraging him to continue in this his good purpose . This being said , he licensed mee from him , saying ; Farewell ( Guzman ) and thinke vpon this businesse , which I put into thy hands , as I haue already done mine honour . And so we parted .

CHAP. VII .

The iest being publikely knowne through Rome , which befell Guzman de Alfarache , together with the ill successe that hee had with the Boore ; for very shame he departs from thence , and goes for Florence . In which iourney , a Thiefe enters into friendship with him , that he might the better vnder that colour , rob him of all that he had .

I Haue often considered with my selfe , how much Passion blindeth him , that is in Loue . And I begin now to thinke Passion blindeth Louers . vpon my Master , that hee should recommend his honour vnto me , as if I knew how to handle it , without soyling it . It comes likewise vnto my remembrance , ( nor can I choose but laugh , when I thinke vpon it ) how it was possible for me , beeing so notorious and offensiue a Lyer , as I was , to stand in such fauour as I did with my Lord : and that his Excellency should treat with mee , more then any other , of matters of importance ; as also , that he should trust mee with his secrets , and his substance , admit of my opinion , and giue credit to all that I should say ; and that I being such a one as I was , from whose mouth neuer came any Truth , which was not adulterated by mee in its going forth , yet I could not indure a Lye in another .

And for that very cause did I hate that man to the death , and could neuer afterwards abide him , that should abuse me ( though but once ) in that kinde . A Lyer loues not a Lye in another . Nor was this any wonder in mee , beeing that it is naturall to all those that negotiate businesses , to be much offended , if they be not in all things punctually dealt withall ; when as they themselues know not how to speake a true word , and are neuer weary of lying . They begin with the highest , and end with the lowest . For what can bee more noble then Truth ? and what The effects of a Lyer . more base then Lying ? If you are to receiue any courtesie from them ; or that you would haue them to doe you a fauour ( though this kindnesse shall cost them nothing ) how many sleights ; how many tricks ; how many delayes , and puttings off from one day to another , and from this , to the next morning , which morning neuer comes ; beeing like vnto that of the Crow , which cryes still Cras , promising that which she neuer performeth ?

But if you are to giue them any thing , and that you doe not keepe touch with them at the time appointed , ( and which is the fault now and then of your best Watches ) that you misse but one minute , if you faile neuer so little of your promise , if you doe not iustly make payment , and delay them but one houre , you are no man of your word , nor doe you know what belongs to good dealing , nor are so honest as you should bee . I did the like with those that I had to doe withall . I did consider ( but foolishly I must confesse ) with my selfe ; What will it benefit mee to tell truth ? What does it concerne mee , that it is the Vice of those that are vile and base , and Lying , the food of beasts . the repast and food of beasts ? What harme shall I receiue , if men will not giue credit vnto me , if I haue got the same already , although they apparantly see that I lye , and that such is their passion , that they will not dis-deceiue themselues of my deceit ? What honour haue I to lose ? How can I faile in my credit ? I am well inough knowne , and the world is now come to that passe , that onely for this cause of my lying , they vphold , maintaine , fauour , Notable instructions for great Princes , & men of qualitie . and esteeme me .

Lying , and Flatterie , is meat alone for g●… men , it is the onely dish that pleaseth their palate , the onely musicke that delighteth their eares . But you are no welcome man vnto them , if you come and tell them , that it is time for them to leaue off gaming , that they haue wasted and consumed their estate , and that their Vassals and Tenants are growne poore and beggerly . That they should not play the Fanfarrones , roysting and swaggering where e're they come : nor shew themselues dissolute , and loose in their behauiour , either in the open streets , or in the Church , which must needs giue occasion of much both hurt and scandall . That they should not bee such lauish and prodigall spenders , as to ruine themselues , and to breake their neckes through too much haste , by taking Post-horses , as it were to runne out of their estates . And seeing that they can finde in their hearts , and make no bones of it , to foole away such a deale of money as they doe , and that so vainely , and so idly , that they would yet make a conscience to pay their seruants their wages , and not to let them goe totter'd and torne , and ready to starue for hunger . That if they bee rich , and in fauour with their Prince , that they dispence a part of these their good fortunes to the poore . That if they haue their Kings eare , and are inward with him , that they should make benefit of this their priuacie , by procuring themselues good and sure friends ; for there is no firmenesse in Fortune ; nor no Princes fauour so fixed , but it may fall off . That at least , on Festiuall dayes , they should rise betimes and get them to Church to heare Masse . And that they should truely and sincerely make confession of their sinnes , and not onely for fashion sake , to cumply with the Parish , being therein onely nominall , but not reall Christians , hauing the name , but not the nature of true Christians ; for there are a kinde of men , that make a show of hauing faith , and that obserue the precepts of the Church , but for no other end , least they should bee punished , if they should doe otherwise . That they should looke well into themselues , and learne to know that they were but men .

And in case that they should bee old and strooken in yeeres , that they are now wrestling with death , who is ready to trip vp their heeles , and throw them into the graue , which lyes ready open to receiue them ; Their sentence is already notified vnto them ; and as they that are to be executed , take leaue of their friends , and haue those Ensignes borne before them , Deaths sentence what manner of thing it is ? which are prepared for that conflict ; So must they at last take their farewell of all those things , where-vnto they liuing bare most affection : As their taste , their sleepe , their seeing , their hearing , & the like ; To which sweet Sences sentence of death is dayly , if not hourely notified , by the Reynes , the Kidneys , the Liuer , the lesser Guts , and our Vrine : The stomake begins to languish , the strength of it waxes weake , its naturall heat begins to faile ; heere the eye-teeth drop away , there the gumm's fall on aking : all which are as a mouldring away of these our clods of earth , and that the timber of this our house is rotten , and the roofe ready to fall about our eares , and that there are no buttresses to vphold this tottering wall ; from the foundation to the very top , it is wholly runne to decay , and the ruine thereof is at hand .

Admonish a young man of these , and the like things ; or some rich yong Necessary lessons for yong Gallants . Gallant , who is as daring , as hee is indiscreet , and so head-strong , that hee will not bee ruled ; represent , I say , vnto him , that hee doth not know his friends from his foes , that for speaking thus , looking there , commending that , and peraduenture for but walking by , if not entring where hee should not , hee will bee suddenly stab'd at one time or other , not hauing so much time as to receiue the blessed Sacraments , nor to call vpon God , to helpe him in this his extremitie ; or to aduise him to consider , that his bloud is corrupted , ill humours abound in him , that hee liues disorderly , as giuen to all excesse and ryot , that he vseth little exercise , and that his often surfeitings will bring him to an Apoplexie , or some other dangerous disease , that will quickly make an end of him , or that the Lambe goes as soone to the Shambles as the sheepe ; and that he should not flatter himselfe , because hee findes himselfe strong in his armes , so and in his feet , lusty in his legges , able in his body , and free from all aches , either in his head , or those his other parts , that therefore he is safe , is priuiledg'd from sicknesse , hath an established health , and assurance of long life .

And here ( me thinkes ) I heare this young gallant say ; Such poore Rascals as thou art , must come to die , and suffer such mis-fortunes as these ; For I am The poore reasons that the rich alledge against the poore . rich , strong , valiant , discreet , and nobly descended . I haue a faite house to dwell in , a soft bed to lie in , I eate what I list , I want nothing that my heart can desire , I liue at pleasure , and doe what I will , with-out controlement ; and where there are no troubles , nor no care-taking , there is no sickenesse , there no doore open for old age to enter . Ah , poore silly foole that thou art ! Samson , Dauid , Salomon , and Lazarus , were more good , more discreet , None liue for euer in this world . more valiant , more gallant , and more rich then thou , and yet they dy'd , when their time was come .

There haue beene many millions of men from Adams time to thine , and yet there was not any one of them that liu'd for euer in this world . He then that shall tell them this Truth , or any thing else that may be for their good , they will take him to be a foole . Who then will aduenture to tell them their faults ? Or who dare speake their minde freely vnto them ? Let a a There is a Spanish Prouerb that sayes , Aueriguelo Vargas Let Vargas approue it . Which is to be vnderstood , when a 〈◊〉 is very intrua●… and hard to be decided . This Prouerbe grew first from the Licenciado Francisco de Vargas , of the Colledge of Santa Cruz in Valladolid , a man of a strong braine , and of a quicke dispatch , whom King Don Fernando made choyse of to be his Secretary . And because he did remit all his Memorials to his scanning , and to giue him an account of them , he would vsually say , when any made suit vnto him ; Aueriguelo Vargas . Couarru . Verb. Vargas . Wee must neither iest with great men , nor tell them the truth . Wee are all of vs but weakelings . Wee ought not to flatter our selues . Vargas speake to this point . He must be either desperate or foolish , that shall presume to tell Princes and great Persons of these things ; for if thou be a man of vnderstanding , and haue any thing in thee worthy commendation , they will presently call thee into the Court , and frame a bill against thee , executing that Statute vpon thee , of Scandalum magnatum . And if thou beest a Buffone and common Iester , they will send thee to the Porters Lodge , and there haue thee whipt . Therefore thou must neither iest with those that are rich and mightie , nor yet be so plaine with them , as to tell them the truth . For , I am not bound to speake the truth , where I know it will not bee accepted , and whence I am sure I shall get great hatred , if not harme , for my good will . It shall be sufficient for my vnderstanding , and all such as I am , to know that all things in this world passe away , and that we shall passe away likewise with them . I could be content to say this ouer and ouer a thousand times together , and repeat no other lesson ; For , to vnderstand this truth alone , is that which most importeth vs , and doth most neerely concerne vs . And why should we promise that vnto our selues , which we can not accomplish ? Hee that holdes himselfe to be the strongest man , of the soundest constitution , of the best composed humours , and the purest mixed elements , this man , I say , ( for all his well ordered frame of nature ) hath no assurance of his long continuance , but is more apt to fall , then those other houses of Clay , which are lesse substantially built . There is not any mans strength , be it neuer so great , that can resist but a puffe of sicknesse ; the best of vs all are but dung-hills , and heaps of dust , which a little blast of winde will scatter away , and lay vs leuell with the earth . Let no man flatter and deceiue himselfe : let him not feigne that to himselfe , which is nothing so : nor intertaine that , which his lying sensualitie shall dictate vnto him . For she will speake that vnto thee , which she vtters to all the world besides . Shee will tell thee ; Thou art great and powerfull , and may'st therefore doe what thou list . That thou art a Gallant , and mayst therefore goe vp and downe , and take thy pleasure . Thou art faire and rich , and mayst therefore be dis-honest , and dissolute . Thou art noble , and mayst therefore lawfully scorne thy inferiours , and thinke none to be equall vnto thee . And if thou receiuest an iniury , it is not for thine honour to put it vp , but to reuenge it to the full . Thou art a Gouernour , and set in authoritie ouer others , and therefore mayst gouerne according to thine owne will , and order businesses for thine owne best aduantage , though it be to the hurt of others , let them maunder their worst , or come what will come , thou need'st not to care . Thou art a Iudge , and mayst therefore iudge in thy friends fauour , mayst tread iustice vnder thy foot and peruert the Lawes at thine owne pleasure . Thou art fauoured by the King , and art able to shew fauour vnto others ; thou mayst therefore vse this thy fauour , as thou shalt Prouerb . thinke fit , and shall sute best with thine owne liking , & blow a a Dara vn humo à narizes . i. disgu●…arle , y ●…ojarle . Couarr . Verbe Humo . None is so good as he thinkes himselfe to be . Man is but dust ; and what kinde of dust . smoake in the noses of the poore , not regarding how thou doest offend , and distaste them . For it stands not with thy reputation , thy Office , thy Dignitie , nor thy honour , that they should aske thee that which thou owest them , nor speake to thee for that his cloake , which thou hast wrongfully taken from him .

But , in good faith ( my Lords ) I must be so bold to tell you , that be yee neuer so great , or be yee so great as yee imagine your selues to be , ( though you can neuer be so great , as you conceit your selues to be ) yet the very best of you , when you are at the best , are no better then a little dust . Make your choyse of which dust yee will ; be it earth , or ashes ; for there are no other sorts of dust . If of earth ; let it put yee in minde , that your beginning was dust , though tempred with a little water , giuing yee thereby to vnderstand ( if your greatnesse make yee not like beasts , that vnderstand not ) that you should make your selues fruitfull for heauen , by entring into a due consideration of your selues , and an acknowledgement of your owne vnworthinesse . Yee know well enough , that the earth cannot , without water , yeeld any fruit ; And if this earth of yours become drie through your vices , and that it bee not watred with the deaw of heauen , with holy inspirations , and with good workes , that it may fructifie and bring forth fruit , by pardoning of iniuries , asking forgiuenesse for those wrongs which yee haue done to others , by paying those debts that yee owe , and by shewing true repentance , yee shall be but as heapes of Ashes , good for nothing , and cast out vpon the dung-hill . And that in the end shall befall ye , which we see to happen vnto Ashes , wherof that Sope is made , that serues to take out the soyles and spots that are in cloathes , and are afterwards as things of no vse , throwne forth vpon some one filthystinking mixen , or other . Yee shall by your bad examples , so terrifie others , and make them so afraid of following the euill courses , that they shall thereby be saued , and yee damned to the pit of hell , that euerlasting burning coale-pit , whose fire shall neuer goe out . These I tell yee , are truths , and now it is time to tell yee them . And if I told yee lyes in my youth , out of a kinde of pride and brauery that I tooke in them , now experience teaches me another lesson , and riper yeeres haue brought me to the knowledge of those many errours , which I then committed .

Nor let any man indanger himselfe , for to thinke , that that may happen We must not deferre our amendment vpon hope of long life . vnto him , which hath befalne me ; to wit , Long-life ; and relying thereupon , grow slacke and carelesse of their amendment , hoping that they may doe that time enough hereafter , when they begin to waxe old ; for a sharpe Easterly winde shall come vpon thee on the sudden , ere euer thou art aware of it , and nip this thy flower of youth , with the cold bitter frost of death , and sheere thee downe to the ground in this thy greene and flourishing state , as grasse is cut downe by the Sithe of the Mower , and thou shalt presently wither , and be carried cleane away , neuer more to be seene . I was neuer sure that I should come to liue thus long , nor can any man else warrant his owne life . For we are all of vs but as Birds that flye abroad in the 〈◊〉 s singing and sporting ▪ while in the meane time the Eagle comes , and seazeth vpon one of them , which seemeth best vnto him . Or else comes the Owner of those grounds , vsing a thousand tricks and deuices to take them . None of vs know the set houre of our death , but all of vs know this , that we must goe one after another . I likewise , haue followed mine owne idle humour , not thinking vpon any settled course in this world ; but because the end which I intend , is to build vp a perfect man , still as I meet with stones fit for this building , I goe The Authors intention . setting of them vp ; these occasions , are my Center , and by them , as by so many lines , I come thereunto . But here I will lay downe this load of stones , and when time shall serue , I will returne againe with another , and it shall not be long e're I gather more , and bring them in place .

Returning therefore to our present purpose ; I say , that I was wholly compacted of lyes , as I had euer beene . With some I would be a Martyr , with Guzman , a notable lyer . other some a Confessor . For all things are not to be communicated to all . And therefore I would neuer truly impart my troubles to any , nor punctually publish them ; but when I was forced to manifest the same , I would tell one man one tale , and another , another ; and no man had it without it's comment . And because a Lyer ( they say ) had need of a good memorie ; I , that A lyer had need of a good memory . had none of the best , to day I would recount the case one way , and to morrow another , and so many times , so many different wayes did I varie from that which I first deliuered : So that , bearing my selfe in this manner , I gaue occasion to those that knew me to be a Lyer , not to giue credit so much to me , as to the generall voyce and report that went abroad . For they did all of them truly and really agree vpon the thing it selfe ; they did iumpe in the matter , but not in the manner . For euery one did either take away , or adde thereunto , as he thought best ; and as thou thy selfe perhaps art wont now and then to doe .

Now , for some few dayes , as a noueltie that had beene newly set abroach , there was no other thing talkt of in all Rome . My mis-fortune was the theame of their Discourse , and my being be●…myr'd , the salt that seasoned their conuersation . It came likewise to my Masters eare , but he being wise , gaue it the hearing , but spake not a word of it . For a Master is not alwaies bound to take notice of all that is done ; for then he should be ty'de ( by the Law of goodnesse , and out of the noblenesse of his nature ) to remedie what is amisse . Hee did dissemble it all that he could , but not so cunningly , but that by some inter-smilings , and casting of his eyes , he made it knowne . He plough'd with me , and therefore knew what furrow I had turned vp . And as it was fit for A Master is not bound to take notice of euery 〈◊〉 tale that is told him . him to dissemble it , so was it for me to denie it . We were silent on all sides , but not very long , for the Deuils clouen foot at last brake out at his shooes . There was a certaine friend of his , and consequently my enemy , who taking him one day all alone , told him , how much it imported both his qualitie and credit , to rid himselfe of me , in regard of the publike and open language , which I vsed of those things which his Lordship had in-trusted me withall , and that euery one might scrue what he would from me , and draw all those secrets from me , which he had committed to my bosome . That Gentlemen of his place and profession should proceed according to that , which represented An Embassadours must haue a care as well of his Masters , as his owne reputation . it selfe vnto them , and that his Lordship doing the contrary , it would proue very preiudiciall to his owne reputation , and his masters seruice . This discourse is mine owne ; and though happely these formall words were not deliuered iust in the same phrase , as I haue now deliuered vnto you ; yet I verily beleeue , they were like vnto these , if not more effectuall then what I haue here set downe . But howsoeuer they were the same , or not the same , I am sure that none of them all could tell him more , then he himselfe already knew , nor aduise him better then he was able to aduise himselfe . And I make no question ▪ that he was not well pleased with that which they said vnto him . But he spake not one word thereof vnto me at that time , nor made any shew of alteration , or carryed any other kinde of countenance towards me , then he was wont to doe . Only , because Lent was now newly come in , hee made vse of that occasion , to liue a little more retyred , and not to talke of prophane and idle matters , and particularly , not of women .

Thus did things runne along . But in regard that I was become the common Table-talke of all the Towne , those that waited on my Lord in his Chamber , his Pages , and other his ordinarie seruants , tooke a little more libertie and licence of language vnto them , then did well beseeme them . For , to make themselues merry , and to intertaine the time , what betweene iest and earnest , they did so nip mee with their witty iests , and pay mee home with their Satyricall lashes , that your Mariners doe not more straine their tacklings in a tempest , then they did wrest and wring the very bowels within mee . So that now at last , neither at home , nor abroad , had I any place , wherein I might rest secure ; nor any wall , where-against to leane , and from whence some Eccho did not sound , that did voice forth the sinnes that I had done .

I had now so lost all patience , and was so in a manner besides my selfe , How a wise man may be made to turne Foole , or mad-man . that one day as I past along the street , I was almost inforced to haue committed many fooleries . He said well , who being ask't , in how long a time , a wise man might turne foole ? Answered ; That is according as the boyes in the street shall flocke about him , abuse him , and hoote at him . This was it that brought the water vp aboue my chinne , and was ready to drowne me ; this was it that made me to for-sweare all sufferance , and to renegue my wonted patience .

Many little children , as well as the greater lubbers , did persecute mee , Guzman persecuted by boyes and children . wheresoeuer I went , laughing and scoffing at mee , with strange out-cryes , and loud showtings , making a most hideous noise . I tooke vp stones , and would haue throwne at them ; but a yong man , of mine owne stature , qualitie and yeeres , well-behaued , but some-what hot and cholericke , came running in vpon mee , and held my arme so fast , that I was not able to moue a finger to doe them any hurt ; yet did hee deale so honestly with mee , as to take part with mee against them all , and to defend mee against this their rage and fury , drawing in two or three other of his friends , that came along in his Company , making resistance both in deeds , and in words , against those Hobber-de-hoyes , which like so many Hob-gobblins , or little Diuels , did haunt me vp and downe from street to street , and from house to house . And hauing now quieted and laid these vnruly sprites , he tooke mee by the hand , bringing me himselfe alone home to my lodging , leauing his Companions behinde to keepe backe the boyes .

When he had brought me thus home , I would faine haue had him to stay with mee , that I might haue fastned some kindnesse vpon him , and haue done him all the courtesie and honour the house could afford : But could by no meanes get him to accept thereof .

Then did I intreat him , that he would tell mee his name , as also where was his lodging , that I might come to kisse his hands , and giue him thankes for the vn-deserued kindnesse I had receiued from him ; but hee would neither acquaint mee with the one , nor the other ; promising to returne some other time to visit me . Onely he told me , that he did beare particular affection as well to my person , as my Country ; for that I was a Spaniard , and that hee was as sensible of this disgrace of mine , as if it were his owne . And with this we tooke leaue each of other . I came home with my colour so changed , my eyes so inflamed , and my vnderstanding so confounded , that ( not considering well what I did ) comming iust in the nick , when dinner was a seruing vp , I would needs goe vp with the rest of the Pages to wait at his Lordships table . But when I was come into the dining roome , and found what Gentlemen were there attending on his Excellencie , I then saw my Guzmans indiscretion . simplicitie , and saw how egregiously I had playd the foole ; and would faine haue holpe my selfe , by getting forth from amongst them : but it was too late ; for my Master had already perceiued by my countenance what I ayled , and ( without casting my water ) that all was not well with me , and that I was inwardly much troubled . Wherevpon he demanded of mee , what was the cause of this my perturbation ? I beeing taken thus on a sudden , hauing no leisure to fall then a coyning , and hauing neuer a new lye in store , went plainely to worke , and told him all the whole truth of the businesse , and euery particular passage thereof ; which was all out , before I was aware , telling that , which I was not willing to vtter . And this was the first Wine , that came out of my Tauerne without water , and the first truth that euer I told in my life . My Master said nothing to it : but those that waited at the boord , not beeing able to forbeare laughing , The first truth , that euer Guzman told . one claps mee the couer of the Cup that he held in his hand before his face , another the Plate that he held betweene his Thumbs , a third the Napkin where-with hee seru'd as Seruer , and those that were empty-handed ; laying one hand on their face , and with the other stopping their mouth ; their hearts being ready to burst in their bellies , hy'de them ( for feare of blurting in my Lords face ) as fast out of the roome , as their legges would carry them . And they past so farre therein beyond the bounds of modestie , that his Excellency was some-what mooued thereat , and call'd out aloud vnto them to be quiet , rebuking them with sharper words then euer heretofore he was wont to doe , reprehending them for this their ouer-boldnesse in his presence . Where-with I was so ashamed , and so quite altered from that I was before , as if I had been sensible of the tearmes of honour , or had some signes thereof still remaining in me .

O how many things doth Rigour correct , which Loue is not able to effect ! It is good sometimes to fall into an errour , that man may learne thereby to take better ●…eed hereafter . O , how much doth it import oftentimes , for to take a good fall , that a man may the better learne to looke to his feet hereafter , and to know how to walke more steddily , and more surely ! Then did I take notice of mine owne deformitie , in that glasse did I see euery spot that I had about me ; and was so quite dasht out of countenance , and so confounded in my selfe , that for all the Masters , and women that were in the world , I would neuer more take vpon mee to treat of their Loue-matters , nor be a Broker in that kinde for the greatest Prince in Christendome . O , what a braue resolution was this , if it would haue held !

The storme being now laid , my Master remained very sad , leaning his cheeke on his hand , and his elbow on the boord , holding his Pick-tooth in his mouth betweene his teeth , beeing much discontented , that these things of mine should runne on in that manner , that he must be forced to doe that , which he neuer thought to haue done ; how-beit it was requisite for him so to doe , for the auoiding of a greater mischiefe ; seeing himselfe now so farre ingaged , that hee should giue some notable touch to his Reputation , if hee should declare himselfe in my defence ; especially , considering that mens seruants are the reall and true marke of what goodnesse and finenesse is their Masters cloth . He will'd me to get me downe to dinner ; And from that time forward , neither I , nor any of my fellowes did for many dayes together , see his countenance so cheerefull , nor finde his tongue so affable , as heretofore it was wont to be .

Now I durst not goe ( as before ) out of doores , but by night . So that all day long I kept my selfe close in my Chamber , spending my time , either in reading good bookes , or playing vpon some Instrument , or talking with my friends . Insomuch , that this retiring of my selfe , wrought in those of the house a new respect ; and in those abroad , silence ; and in my selfe , another course of life , differing from that which I led before .

Now euery mans tongue was still , and now by absenting my selfe from their sight , all these my businesses were forgotten , as if they had neuer beene . The Yong man came often to visit mee , that had taken my part , when I was so vilely mockt and abus'd by the Boyes . He made mee many offers of his Purse and his Person ; hee acquainted mee with his Country , his Name , and the cause of his comming to Rome , which was to get a Dispensation of his Holinesse , and that hee had spent therein a great deale of money and time , and yet was as farre from effecting his businesse , as the first houre that heeset foot in that Citie . I held my selfe bound to doe him all the good offices that I could to further this his pretension , giuing credit to all that he told mee . And because I did desire , that some faire occasion might bee offered , whereby I might repay part of that debt , wherein I stood bound vnto him ; I intreated him , that hee would acquaint mee with his businesse , and I would petition my Lord Embassador in his behalfe , and negociate it with all the speed I could . Hee returned mee many thankes for this my kinde offer , and told mee that hee had now hit into the right path , wherein hee was to walke , and that he had now very good and assured hopes to bring his purpose to passe . But in case this course should faile him , whereinto hee had now put himselfe , hee would then intertaine that courtesie whereof I had made him so willing a tender . And thus wee past the time a while in complement , giuing and taking by turnes some Ceremonies of Court-ship , till at last he askt mee , whether I would take the paines to walke along with him to the Palace ? I excused my selfe vnto him , and told him the cause why I had retyred my selfe , and how well it sped with mee ; for by my not going abroad , mine owne minde was now quieted , and the noise and hurry of the Towne very well allayd .

This yong fellow was as very a Wagge as my selfe , much of my age , and his Beard ( like mine ) newly budding forth ; he presently caught hold of these words , as those , which he most desired to heare to come from me ; and when I had herein satisfied his longing , he said thus vnto me :

Sennor Guzman , you haue carried your selfe with that discretion , as is proper vnto you , and may truely bee termed your owne . And I hold this for as good and sure a remedie , as I find it difficult for you to put it in practise , and to make continuall vse of it ; For sometimes such necessarie occasions represent themselues vnto vs , that men are inforced , whether they will or no , to breake these their firme purposes , and religious resolutions . If I , Sir , were in your case , rather then I would bee thus mewed vp , and for so long a time , I would weare out this disgrace by trauelling abroad , rounding all Italy , before I would returne . In which your trauell , you shall not onely take singular content , but you shall likewise obtaine your intended end , and with more aduantage , then you can possibly pretend , by this your priuate shutting Trauell yeeldeth much delight . vp of your selfe in your Lords house . For Time and Absence , weare out all things , and are the best Physicians that can bee found for such kinde of diseases as these .

He went likewise leading me along with the relation of diuers and sundry curiosities , presenting vnto mee the great excellencies of Florence , the beauty of Genoa , and the incomparable gouernment of Uenice , and other things of great delight , which did so dispose mee to vndergoe this course , which ( after that hee had taken his leaue of mee ) wrought so vpon mee all that night , that I could not take any rest , nor thinke vpon any other thing . Me thought , that I had already pluckt on my Bootes , and put on my Spurres , and that I was now onward on my way . Wherevpon I got mee vp as soone as it was day , and brought my Lord his cloathes ; to whom , while hee was making him ready , I gaue an account of this my resolution . Hee liked very well of it , holding it a commendable , and an honest course , that it would make much for my good , and stop all those mouthes , that were now so clamorous against me . He then told me , what others A louing Master , what manner of man he it . had said of mee ; and that , which hee sate musing on at boord , when he shew'd himselfe so sad how he was then beating his braines about my good & how much he did desire to see me well accommodated , for the great affection that he bare vnto me , and that he had set his wits aworke for me ; but seeing that mine owne inuention had hit so well ; he told me , that if I had a minde to goe into France , I should haue Letters of recommendation to his friends there in my fauour ; or if that I should make any other choyse to my better liking , he would not be wanting vnto me , but deale well and worthily with me , as one that had done him true and faithfull seruice .

I had a great desire to haue gone into France , for the great state and Maiestie that I had often heard of that Kingdome , but much more of that their noble and renowned King ; But things were not then in that case that I could conueniently execute my longing . I kist his hands , and thank't his Excellencie for these his fauours towards me ; and told him , that ( if it might stand with his good leaue and liking ) I was very desirous to trauell first thorow all Italy , and especially see Florence , whereof I had heard such large commendations ; and from thence goe to Siena , where Pompeyo did then reside , one that was my especiall good friend , and well knowne to his Lordship , for we did ordinarily conuerse together by our Letters , though we had neuer seene one another . Which correspondence had knit a strict knot of friendship betweene vs .

My Master was very glad of this motion ; and from that day forward , began to set things in order for my iourney . Purposing with my selfe to make hereafter a new Booke , washing away by my vertues , those spots , which Vice had stained me with all .

CHAPTER VIII .

Guzman de Alfarache , discourses of Deceit . He departs from Rome . Hee desires to see Siena , where certaine theeues meet with his Trunkes , which he had sent away before , and robbe him of all that he had .

THat most famous Philosopher Seneca treating of Deceit , Seneca's saying , touching deceit . ( whereof we haue said somewhat already in the third Chapter of this booke , though all that shall be spoken thereof , will be too little ) in one of his Epistles saith ; That there is a deceitfull kinde of promise , which is made to the Fowles of the ayre , the Beastes of the field , the Fishes in the waters , and men themselues vpon earth . Deceit comes vnto vs in that submissiue kinde of manner , in solowly , and so humble a fashion , that they that doe not know her , may be condemned of ingratitude and inciuilitie , if they doe not set wide-open the gates of their soule , and runne out to receiue her with open both armes and heart . And for that the arte thereof , which is now a dayes The nature of deceit . professed , the studies , the watchings , and the diligences , which are vsed therein , are all done with a double minde , and set themselues a-worke with a false intent ; by how much the more the thing that is treated of , is in it's nature of that qualitie , that we may therein easily commit many errours , that may turne much to our preiudice , by so much the more secret subtilties , crastie Counter-minings , cunning Stratagems , strong Artillerie , and warlike munition , she fortifies her selfe , furnishing her selfe with all necessarie prouision , when she meanes to come into the field . And therefore wee It is better to bee deceiued , then to deceiue . need not so much to wonder , that we are now and then , but that we are not alwayes deceiued . And the case standing so , I hold it a lesse euill , to be deceiued by others , then to be the Authors of so sacrilegious a sinne .

Amongst other things which King Don Alonso would ( who was surnamed the Wise ) in-discreetly reforme in nature , this was one amongst the rest ; that he did blame her , that she had not made a Window in mans brest ; that we might see that , which he was plotting in his heart , and whether his manner of proceeding were faire and sincere , or whether his words were feigned , or whether ( like Ianus ) he had two faces vnder one hood ? And the cause of all this , is Necessitie ; for if a man finde himselfe laden with obligations , and Necessitie makes men bold . knowes not how to ease himselfe of them , he goes about to seeke all the helpes and meanes he can , to lighten him-selfe of this load , and to come off as handsomely as he can . Necessitie teacheth vs the way to all this , and makes the hardest and most vntrodden paths , to appeare euen , and easie to be hit . It will breake thorow the thickest Briers , and clamber vp the roughest and steepest Rocks . It is in its owne nature ( as is before mentioned in our first chapter ) full of daringnesse , and of Lying . And for this cause , euen your simplest Birds and Beasts secke to deceiue . and most innocent Birds haue their tricks and their subtilties . The Doue flies with a strong and swift wing , seeking food for her tender young ones , whilest another of her owne kinde , from the highest top of some one Oake or other , calsher , and inuites her , that she will intertaine her selfe there awhile to ease and refresh her selfe , and only to the end , that the cunning Fowler may come the more conueniently to make his shoot , and kill her . The poore harmelesse Nightingale , in a wilde and carelesse fashion , goes thorow the Woods sweetly thrilling forth her loue-sicke complaints , when lo , another Bird of the same feather , that is clapt into a Cage , awaking new iealousies , deceiues her with a false call , and brings her into the Net , by meanes whereof , shee becomes a perpetuall prisoner during her life .

Auianus the Philosopher tels vs in one of his Fables , that euen your Asses The tale of an Asse , that sought to deceiue . haue also a minde to deceiue , and he maketh mention of one , that had put on a Lyons skinne , to make all the rest of the beasts of the Forrest afraid ; who being sought after by his Master , when he saw him in that kinde of cloathing , not being able therewith to hide his huge long eares , he presently knew this his Asse , and soundly basting his backe and sides with a good cudgell , and stripping him of his counterfeit skinne , he remained as very an Asse as hee was before .

Of all creatures liuing , there is scarce any one , but will , for the effecting All vse deceit . of his purpose , vse some deceit against him , who is carelesse thereof , and thinkes not on it ; As is expressed in that Impresse , of a Snake that lay asleepe , An Impresse of the Snake , and the Spider . and a Spider , that came secretly downe for to nip him by the head , and strike his poyson into him , and so worke his death ; whose Motto speakes thus : No ay prudençia , que resista al engan̄o . No wisdome can withstand deceit . It is folly for any man to thinke , that a wise man can fore-see , and preuent those deceits , which like so many Traps and Gins , are laid in his way . I was not so circumspect , as I should haue beene , I suspected no trecherie , I receiued good The qualities of a cunning theefe . deeds , I heard good words , I saw a man in an honest and fashionable habit , who sought to giue me good counsell , and seemed to fauour me , who had put his life in danger , to saue mine , who visited me ( as I thought ) without any hope of interest , or particular profit to himselfe , not being able to fasten vpon him ( so vnwilling did he euer seeme to receiue any courtesie from me ) so much as a Cup of cold water . He told me , that he was my Country-man , an Andaluzian , borne in the Citie of Seuill , a principall Gentleman of the house of the Sayauedras , and one of the noblest , the ancientest , and best qualified Sayauedra , a notable theefe . of all that Familie ; and who , from one of such a qualitie , would haue suspected such deceit ? But all were lyes that he told me ; for he was of Ualençia , whose name , for some iust causes I conceale ; but he spake the Language of Castile excellent well , and had the true tone thereof , that it was not possible to discerne him to be other . Hee was a handsome well-fauoured young man , well spoken , of a faire behauiour , and a fine Companion in his conuersation ; Who would haue once suspected , that he should haue prou'd such a Conny-catching Rascall , and that with such ceremonious and feigned friendship , he should thus deceiue me ? But all this cuning carriage of his , was but like a Peacocks dressing , making this so faire a show , that therby he might the better deceiue me , & that he might haue the freer accesse into my Lords house , and into my Chamber , to filch from thence whatsoeuer he could handsomely finger . I had no mistrust of him in the world , but rather held him so honest a man , that I durst haue pawn'd my life for his truth .

He came the other day to visit me , and finding that I had altred my habit , Sayauedra visits Guzman , only that he might rob him of that he had . and put my selfe into another kinde of fashion of cloathes , differing from my wonted weare , he startled and stood afterwards as one amazed , not knowing what he might thinke of it , or what might be the cause of this change . At last he askt me the reason of this sudden alteration ? I told him , that I had taken his counsell , and that I was resolued to goe to Siena , where I should meet with Pompeyo , a great and intire friend of mine , and from thence to passe for Florence , and so afterwards to visit all Italy .

When he heard me say so , he began to take fresh breath , and seemed to be very glad thereof , much commending this my resolution , and altring withall his owne determination : for if his designe vntill then , were only to seeke out some fit occasion to steale thence an odde sute of cloathes , some trifling Iewels , or some odde pieces of Gold , not worth the talking of ; hauing now heard this newes of my sudden departure , no lesse would now content him , then my whole store . Hee was very diligent in obseruing how I did make vp my Trunkes , putting his helping hand thereunto . He marked where I had laid a set of Gold Buttons , a Chaine , and other Iewels that I had ; and aboue three hundred Spanish Pistolets that I carryed along with me . For my Lord Embassadours house , being I did not now vse to play , but to hoord vp what Igot , yeelded me , in the space of some foure yeeres that I seru'd him , good store of money , what in gifts ; what for good lucks sake , Gamesters bestowd vpon me , when they had a good hand ; what by Cardes , which I was euer ready to furnish them withall , and what with other Presents , that now and then came vnlook't for vnto me .

When I had lockt , and maled vp my Trunkes , I laid the Keyes vpon my Beds-head , whereon Sayauedra had set his heart ; for then did he desire nothing more , then to meet with some fit occasion , how he might come to the fingring of them , and finde meanes to falsifie them . And it fell out iust , a a The Spanish phrase is , A que quieres boca , That is , Darle todo lo que quiere , y quanto pidierè . Couarr ▪ Verbe Boca . as hee would haue it . For , as hee and I were talking of my iourney , and telling him that I purposed to send away my Trunkes before , and that I would stay some sixe or seuen dayes in Rome , to take leaue of my friends , by which time they would be at Siena , where I should finde them ready for mee , when I came thither ; in that very instant there came one of my Lords feruants vnto mee , and told me , that there were some beneath did inquire for me , and did much desire to speake with me . And because my Chamber was out of order , vnswept , and not fit , by reason it was so foule , to receiue any visit , I went downe to see who they were .

In the Interim , Sayauedra had opportunitie to take the print of all my keyes in certaine pieces of some Waxe Candles ends that lay about the Sayauedras croft inccozening Guzman . Chamber , if hee had not purposely brought some along with him in his pocket . Those that sought for mee , were certaine Muleters , or Carriers , which came for my luggage ; they came vp , I deliuered it vnto them , and they carried it away .

This businesse dispatcht , my friend and I continued talking together : and because hee did not offer to goe away , I thought hee did it out of courtesie , and the friendship that was betweene vs , and that it was out of his loue to keepe mee company , for that little while that I was to stay . Whereas indeed he onely stayd in Towne , till these counterfetted keyes were fashioned by the Smithes hand , and to make me to breake my sleepes , as by and by I shall tell you .

Hee continued his Visits with mee for three or foure dayes together : and when hee thought hee had made all cock-sure , and that the Bird could not now escape his hand ; hee came one euening vnto my Chamber , where hee had not sate long , but that his face changed colour , and beganne to put on that feigned hiew , which hee was willing to giue it , hanging his head in his bosome , making show as if hee had beene taken with a great paine in his head , an extreme Ach in his shoulders , a strange kinde of sowrenesse or bitternesse of his mouth and palate , and aboue all , with a wonderfull heauinesse in his eyes , that hee was scarce able to hold them vp . Hee seemed to bee as it were in a Lethargie , or the like drowzie disease ; complaining , that hee was scarce able to stand vpon his legges , desiring mee that I would giue him leaue to goe home to his lodging . I was very sorry , and held it as a great vnhappinesse , that my Chamber was not fitted for to lodge him , and to giue him that friendly intertainment , as my heart desired : Intreating him , ( when I saw hee would needs bee gone ) that hee would acquaint mee with his lodging , that I might come and visit him , and send him some physicall curiosities , fit for sicke folkes , to rellish his taste , and comfort his stomake , or that I might serue him in any thing else , wherein I might bee vse-full vnto him . Hee told mee , that hee lodged in the house of a certaine Gentle-woman , that liu'd very secret and priuate ; but in case this his sicknesse should not suddenly leaue him , or that he should chance to grow worse and worse , that then hee would aduise mee thereof , that I might come and visit him . And so taking his leaue of mee , Sayauedra rides Post to Syena , and finely robs Guzman of his T●…kes . that very day hee tooke Post , and rode towards Siena , where hee found his Companions , that went along with the Muleters , that they might see where , and to whom these Trunkes were consigned .

When hee was come to Siena , the people seeing a Gentleman come in that good equipage by Post , tooke him to bee some principall Spantard . Hee alighted at the chiefest Inne that was in all the Citie , where presently his Companions came about him , who had there attended his comming , and giuing it out that they were his seruants , they waited diligently vpon him .

That very day , as soone as hee was arriued , he sent one of them to Po●…peyo , to giue him to vnderstand , that hee was newly come to Towne . And when my friend had receiued this message , and knew that I was in the Towne , hee was so ouer-ioyed , that going to put on his Cloake , it was a good while , ere hee could finde the way to vnfold it , and to set it right vpon his shoulders . And hee himselfe afterwards told mee , that hee first threw it one way , and then another ; one while with the wrong side outward , another with the cape doubled in , and out of order , and in the end , when he could not hit the right , through his too much ioy , hee carelessely flung it onely vpon one shoulder , and in this vnmannerly kinde of manner , he came from home in all haste , stumbling and tripping in the streets , and some-times ready to fall vpon his nose , through his too much haste , and the longing desire that he had to see me .

Being come to the Inne , where Sayauedra had put on my person , hee tooke it very vnkindely , complaining much , that I should make him such a stranger , and deale so vnfriendly with him , as not to alight at his house , which I might command as freely as mine owne . Which Sayauedra hauing excused as well as hee could ; they afterwards fell into discourse , talking of his iourney , and some other things of Rome , vntill it was night .

At which time Pompeyo , for the present , taking his leaue of him , that hee might leaue him to his rest : Sayauedra gaue ( in his presence ) the key of one of his Trunkes , to one of his seruants , saying vnto him withall ; Doe you heare , Sirrha ? Goe you along with S●…n̄or Pompeyo , and take mee out such a sute , which you shall finde in such a part , for I will put on that to morrow .

They went away together , and his seruant punctually performed that , which his Master had commanded him ; vn-cording , in the presence of Pompeyo , the very selfe-same Trunke , where-vnto hee was directed , and taking forth the fore-said sute of cloathes , hee lockes mee the Trunke , and putting vp the key in his pocket , hee comes his way . That night Pompeyo sent him a very good supper , a neat collation of Comfits , and sweet meates , and admirable rich Wines : Wherewith when Sayauedra and his fellowes had supt , and had eate and drunke their fill , they got them to bed , where they so soundly slept , that they did not wake till the next day .

That morning Pompeyo came some-what early to visit him ; but his seruants intreated him to hold their Master excused ; for he had not taken any rest all that night , and was now newly falne asleepe . Hee told them , he was very sorry hee had so ill a night of it ; hee would not therefore now trouble him , but would goe his way and come againe anon . But they would by no meanes giue way to that , telling him , that their Master would bee very angry with them , when hee should know that hee had beene there , and that none of them had either so much wit , or manners to tell him of it . Where-vpon , they went presently vp into his Chamber , and signified vnto him , that Sennor Pompeyo was come to see him . Hee was very glad of it , and commanding one of them to set ready a Chaire for him , sent down another to intteat him to come vp .

Pompeyo , as soone as hee came in , asked him how hee did , and what was the cause of his last nights indisposition ? He told him , that for want of vse , hee was so weary with riding Post , that hee found himsslfe some-what distempered , his body being ouer-heated , and that hee had a purpose to be let bloud .

Pompeyo was very earnest with him , that hee would change his lodging , and take his house for his Inne . Sayauedra excused himselfe , telling him , that his seruants were vnruly , and giuen to disorder , and that hee was resolued to put them away , and to take new within these eight or nine dayes , and that then he would promise him to receiue this courtesie at his hands , which he had so kindly offered vnto him : Intreating him in the meane while , that he would doe him the kindnesse , as to send his Trunkes by one of his owne seruants , because hee had no great trust in any of his owne ; and fearing , that giuing them the Keyes to fetch such things as hee needed , they might put some tricke vpon him .

Pompeyo liked well of it , and thought that hee did therein very wisely and discreetly , onely hee seemed not to bee so well pleased , that he should treat of taking Physicke in an Inne . But resting contented with the promise that hee had made him , hee performed what hee desired , and was no sooner come to his lodging , but hee laded certaine Porters with his Trunkes , and sending one of his seruants along with them , hee saw them safely deliuered to Sayauedra . Hee sent him that day a very dainty dinner ; and those two friends hauing taken leaue of each other for that night , that they might goe to bed in a good houre , Sayauedra and his Companions conuayed secretly into another house that which they had brought thither , and taking Post , departed presently for Florence ; whither , when they were Sayauedra and his companions Post away to Florence , where they diuide the Spo●…e . come , they diuided the spoile amongst them .

These copartners with Sayauedra , were their crafts-Masters , subtill fellowes , and stout Rogues ; and the principall plotter and contriuer of all these pilfring proiects , was a Bolonian borne , hee was a great Scholler , and a very learned Doctor in this kinde of Art ; his name was Alexandro Bentiuoglio , the sonne of a Doctor in that Vniuersitie , who was a rich man , and a great proiector , but of no extraordinarie Discourse , but one that did build Castles in the ayre , and frame in his imagination mighty matters , and things of great intertainment .

This man had two sonnes , in condition quite opposite , and contrarie one to the other . The elder was called Uicencio , an ignorant yong fellow , a silly Asse , the laughter of the people , with whom your Noblemen and Gentlemen made sport ; he would bolt you out the famousest fooleries that could bee deuised : One while , hee would boast his Nobilitie , another while his Valour ; sometimes hee would take vpon him to be a great Musician , and then falling off from that , hee would bragge of his Horsemanship , and his Poetry ; and aboue all , hee would professe himselfe to bee the onely Enamorado , and perfectest Loue-proficient in all the Country . So that of him , it might bee said , Dexalas a a Dexalas penen , is some phrase tending to that purpose , as I turne it ; or some catch of a Song . I would be glad to bee better informed . penen . Suffer such to dye in their folly .

The other was this Alexander , a notable Thiefe , nimble finger'd , and of a strong and able body . Who , though hee were well borne , yet was he ill bred , and for want of good education , became an excellent Vagabond , and a notorious Rogue , by keeping of euill company . This mans Companions , were other such like ruffianly fellowes as himselfe . For like will to like ; and all sorts of things haue recourse to their proper center .

Now , because hee was their Ring-leader , and the onely principall man amongst them , and that did all in all , hee made Sayauedra content himselfe Ill company hurtfull . with a little , giuing him some , but the worser sort of my cloathes . And thinking that he could not remaine there in safety , he got him into the Popes territories , where his father was Alcalde . So that he posted to Bologna , carrying away with him the Buttons , the Iewels , and the Pistolets , retiring himselfe home to his fathers house . And the rest of his fellowes , that shared with him , fled to Trent , as they afterwards told mee in Bologna , and there they dispersed themselues .

When Pompeyo returned to visit mee , not finding my Statua there , nor any of his fellowes , hee askt mine Host of the house what was become of them ? He told him , that the night before , they went away from thence with their Trunkes , but whether they knew not . Hee tooke this for an ill signe ; and suspecting what this might chance to proue in the end , vsed great and extraordinarie diligences in the search of them ; and hauing notice that they rode Post by the way of Florence , hee sent Hue and Cry after them , with a warrant to apprehend them . But leauing them to this their businesse : let mee returne now vnto my selfe , and God grant , that in the meane while , they may haue the good lucke to meet with these Theeues , and recouer my lost goods .

Those few dayes that I afterwards stay'd in Rome , I was iocund and merry , and did not so much as once dreame of any such roguerie intended against me . And out of a great desire that I had , to know how my sicke friend did , whether he had recouered his health , or were in worse case , then when he left me ; I staid foure dayes waiting for him , but seeing he came not at me , nor sent vnto me , I continued foure dayes longer in Towne , making inquirie after him amongst some of his Country-men , giuing them al the markes and signes , whereby they might know , or at least ghesse at the man , but this was to aske for a a Preguntar por Entunes en Portugal . Where there is no such thing to bee found . Guzma●… is sorrie that hee cannot see Sayauedra before his departure . Entunes in Portugall , or to looke to heare a Magnificat Pr●…erb . at Mattens , or to seeke after the man in the Moone , for there was no such kinde of thing to be heard of . All the diligences that I could vse , were to no purpose . I did verily beleeue that he was very sicke , if not dead . I likewise thought with my selfe , that since he had concealed his lodging from me , that the reason thereof was , because he had not a conuenient Chamber to receiue the visits of his friends . I did as much as lay in me to looke him out : but when I saw it was all lost labour , and that I could not possibly heare any newes of him , I left a large recommendation of my loue vnto him in my Lords house , and so taking leaue of my Lord Embassadour , I resolued the next day following to begin my iourney .

My Lord grieued much for my departure , clapt both his hands vpon my The Embassadours kinde vsage of Guzman at his departure . shoulders , and taking a chaine of Gold from off his necke , which he did vsually weare , and putting it on mine , he told me , while he was doing me this honour ; Guzman , I bestow this vpon thee , that thou maist , as oft as thou look'st vpon it , haue me in thy remembrance , as one that wishes thee all good . He gaue me also , besides that which I had of mine owne , good store of Crownes , which would serue conueniently to defray my charges for some reasonable while very well , and plentifully , that I needed not to want any thing that was needfull and fitting for me .

When hee had thus furnisht me , hee laid his Command vpon mee , that How a seruant should behaue himselfe , to bee belou'd of his fellowes . where-soeuer I should hap to be , I should from time to time giue him an account of my health , and how things did succeed with me , assuring me , that none should reioyce more in my well-doing , then himselfe ; hoping , when I had made an end of my trauell , to see me againe in his house , whither I should alwayes be most welcome .

These his words and kinde vsage of me , fauoured of so much loue , and the aduice and counsell which he gaue me at this my farewell , was so sweet and so sound , and deliuered with that tendernesse , exhorting me to good and vertuous courses , that I could no longer hold from bathing my eyes with teares . I kist his hand , kneeling on the ground ; he bestowd his blessing vpon mee , and with it a good high-way Nag . This done , downe I went , got vp , bid my fellowes farewell , and rode my way , making vse of this Nagge in all my trauell , which did neuer faile me .

My Lord and his seruants were ready to melt for the sorrow they had conceiued of my departure . He , because he lou'd me , and saw he must now lose me , and would doubtlesse finde a want of me for such seruices as I could best doe him , and himselfe tooke most content in : And they , because , albeit my actions were ill for my selfe , and turned much to mine owne hurt , yet were they neuer preiudiciall to my fellowes : and when occasion serued ( if they had beene put to the triall ) I dare sweare they would haue hazarded their liues in defence of my person , rather then they would haue seene mee take any wrong . I was alwayes their good friend , neuer did them ill offices , told no tales of them , neuer nourisht any quarrels amongst them , neuer crost their pretensions with my Lord , or hindred them in those their suites , wherein they were interessed , but did further them all that I could ; so that I was generally well beloued of them all . For by doing them these reall courtesies , and in that free and friendly fashion , I could not but gaine the greater loue thereby , if not profit . For they were reckned of by my Lord but as seruants ; but I was vnto him , as if I had beene his sonne : So that I receiued from them the commendation of a good brother , and from my Master , of a faithfull seruant . Insomuch , that neither my seruise dis-merited with my Lord , nor their friendship failed me at my need .

And if that publike fame which was spred abroad of me , touching that which so vnfortunately befell me in Fabia's house , had not beene diuulged abroad by that Aspine-leau'd tongue of Nicoleta , who to as many gossips , and friends as she had in Rome , babbled forth the iest , which was put vpon mee by her Mistresse in the backe Court of her house , I had neuer forsaken that commoditie , which I found in my Lords house , nor his Lordship haue lost so good a seruant , who had so well and faithfully seru'd him . See what mischiefe a wicked womans tongue can worke ; who , without doing her selfe Much mischiefe in an euill womans tongue . any good ( playing the tattling huswife ) discredited her Masters house , and disordred ours .

Let no man trust a woman with a secret , no ( if it were possible ) not the wife of his owne bosome . For vpon euery light offence , that she may be reuenged of thee , to plucke out one of thy eyes , she will be content to lose both her owne ; making of a little bracke a great hole , and working thee much trouble vpon small occasion .

I went out of Rome like a Prince , well intreated , and better prouided , hauing store of Crownes to spend abroad , till the durt I had taken should become drie , and be rubb'd out . For when such vnluckie chances as these doe light vpon vs , there is no such remedy for them , as Time and Trauell to weare them out . Mingo neuer went abroad with more contentment , then I did now ; I was gallant , rich , out of the gun-shot of ill tongues ; with a full resolution , neuer to returne the same man I went forth , but like a new Phoenix , receiuing fresh life from these my old ashes .

I was now on my way towards my friend Pompeyo , who lookt for me euery houre , hauing prouided for me a neat lodging , with a handsome bed , and Table , and all other furniture fitting thereunto . I came at last to Siena , and inquiring after him , they directed me to his house ; thither I came : I found him within , he receiued me . I cannot say whether more cheerefully , or more heauily , sometimes shewing a ioyfull , sometimes a troubled countenance ; not knowing either what to doe , or what to say , concerning the forepassed ill successe of my Trunkes . Hee was inwardly very sad , as well for the value of that I had lost , as also for the tricke that was put vpon him , and the ill account that he should make me of those my goods , which I had consigned vnto him . Hee said neuer a word to me touching my Trunkes , and would faine haue kept it from me ; but it was not possible . For I had purposed with my selfe , to shew all my brauerie the next day , and like the Peacocke , proudly to iot it vp and downe the streets of Siena , and for that purpose , requested him to helpe me to my Trunkes , that I might change my cloathes .

Hereupon he was inforced to open all the whole businesse vnto me , putting me in good hope , that there were such diligences vsed , and that good course already taken , that he did not doubt but that I should haue all againe , and lose nothing of that which they had thus cunningly stolne from me . I was strooke with this blow to the very heart ; and was thereupon so sad , as thou thy selfe wouldst haue beene , hadst thou beene in my case , being thus stripped of all that thou hadst in a strange Countrie , farre from thy friends , and forced to seeke new , hauing but little store of money in thy Purse , and no more but Proucrb . one sute of cloathes to thy backe , and two Shirts in thy Port-manteau . God deliuer vs from the hands of theeues and robbers , and from the frauds and deceits of wicked men . It was now too late to looke after them ; the harme was already done , but no remedy to be had . Que for çoso lo aueys a a D●…rsela 〈◊〉 beuer . 1. dor dis gusto , y dar vn mal trago . Nadie diga , desta agua no beuer●… . Couarru Verbe Beuer. de beuer , y no lo aueys de verter . Whether I would or no , I was constrained to drinke of this cup ; there was no auoyding of it .

Well , when I saw how the world went , and that there was no helpe for it ; I pluckt vp my spirits , set a good face on the matter , and drew strength out of weaknesse . For , if I should in publike haue expressed my griefe , and made open shew thereof , I might , in priuate mens opinions , beene held base-minded , and a man of no metall ; and might thereby haue hazarded Pompeyos friendship . Nor , had I kept neuer such stirre , neuer such a coyle and adoe about it , should I thereby haue repayred my losses , or done my selfe any good by it .

And therefore sound was that counsell ; that we should incounter aduersities Aduersities stoutly to be withstood . with a cheerefull countenance . For thereby our enemies are ouercome , and our friends recouer breath .

CHAPTER IX .

Guzman de Alfarache , not recouering his lost goods , shrewdly complaines of the small punishment that is laid vpon theeues . Wherein he deliuereth many things worthy the noting .

THree dayes ( according to the common saying ) I continued booted and spurd , expecting what newes I could heare from those , that had these theeues in chase , and whether they had had the good lucke to finde the track of their footing , and so follow them vpon the heate of that sent , till they had them in view , and should come to ouer-take them .

While my friend and I were sitting at table , anon after we had din'de , as wee were talking of this mis fortune of mine , and the cunning carriage of these theeues that had thus robd me , I might heare a great trampling of the seruants of the house and some others , who making haste vp the staires , came in and told vs ; We haue him , we haue him , the principall thiefe is taken , and the theft confest .

This put new courage into me , quickned my bloud , and the tokens of my The ioy of the heart , cannot but expresse it selfe in our lookes . inward content , shewd themselues in my face . For it is not possible , that any mans heart should dissemble a sudden ioy . Though it sometimes so hapneth , that excesse of ioy , doth suffocate the naturall heat , and depriue it of it's life . You might now haue lighted a Candle at mine eyes , they did so sparkle , and were growne so quicke ; me thought then I was giuing Albriçias to as many as demanded it o●… me , and that I ranne with open armes to receiue this welcome newes . We rose vp from the table , ( where we sate talking before on this businesse ) to goe and meet and salute this Officer , that had beene imployd in this seruice , who ( as if he had beene no lesse affected therewith then my selfe ) came towards me with his mouth full of ioy , and hauing kindely imbraced one another , I askt him how the world went ? He told me , it was like to goe well . Then I farther demanded of him , In what manner ? Hee replyde , that one of the theeues was taken , the rest he could not meet with , but that this would discouer all .

Thou hast haply obserued , that when store of water hath beene suddenly What the effects of sorrow are likened vnto . throwne vpon quicke burning coales , there hath risen vp at that very instant a thicke & sowltrie hot smoake , yeelding almost such a steame of heate , as the coales themselues gaue before they were quenched . Euen in the like case did these his words leaue me . For all those manifest signes of ioy , which had before diffused themselues thorow-out my whole body , were quite quenched with the water of this bad newes , and at that very instant , there was stirred vp in me an infernall smoake of choller , which I had much adoe to suppresse ; but because I knew it would not helpe mee , I dissembled it the best that I could .

Pompeyo call'd for his cloake , and went presently to the Iudge of the Court , to intreat him , that he would vse therein the best diligences he could , ( which was no more then was fitting to be done . ) But all this did me no good . For , he neither denyed the theft , nor confessed that he was in the fault . He said that the others had committed it , and that he was but their seruant , and that they had only bestow'd vpon him one poore suit of cloathes , which he sold and spent partly in Florence , and partly vpon the way in his returne to Siena .

And this is the common course of such kinde of wicked people ; They The condition of wicked people . further , and fauour each others euill workes and counsels , but when they haue wrought their purpose , and effected their intent , they forsake one another , leauing euery man to shift for himselfe , some going one way , and some another .

Vpon this Confession , ( because it was the first theft that euer he had beene taken with , together with that which hee had alledged in his own defence , and for those other considerations , which offered themselues vnto the Iudge ) he was sentenced to publike shame , and afterwards to remaine a banished man from that Citie for a certaine time .

Now while this businesse was a handling , one of Pompeyos seruants stood diligently waiting there , expecting the issue of this businesse , that hee might come and aduise mee thereof . And when hee had his Sentence giuen him , as if he had brought my Trunkes along with him , hee came running vp in all haste to my Chamber , laughing all the way as hee came , and as iocund as a Pye , crying out aloud vnto me ; O Sennor Guzman , laugh and be merry ; the Thiefe that holpe to rob you , is condemned to open shame , I saw him vp on the Asses backe , before I came away : if you will see him , hye you to the window , and looke out quickly , for it cannot be longere hee come . O , how much would I haue giuen , that this Foole , this Block-head , this Coxcombe had beene mine owne seruant , and in mine owne house , or in some other place , where I might haue had my will of him , that I might haue pumeld him about the pate , bob'd him about the nose , strooke out the teeth of him , and beaten the iaw-bones of this Asse so sore , that hee should not haue beene able for a moneth after to fall to his feeding . I was mightily out of patience at these his foolish words . O thou Traytor , ( said I to my selfe ) seest thou in what poore case I am , and in a manner quite vndone , and doest thou goe about to comfort me with such a poore satisfaction as this ? I was ready almost to burst with choller ; but euen then , when it was in its greatest force , there did offer it selfe vnto my remembrance iust such another comfort as this ; which was told mee for a truth had passed in Scuill ; which made my sides to tickle againe with laughing , the very thought whereof , had made me quite forget my former anger . And this it was :

A Iudge of that Citie , by especiall Order from the supreme Councell , Guzman telleth a tale of a stout Iudge , as a soobsh Attourney . tooke a delinquent , that had beene a famous falsifier of Deeds , had often counterfetted his Maiesties hand , and fained many false Patents , by meanes whereof , hee got a great deale of money in diuers parts , and at diuers times ; for the which hee was by the said Iudge , condemned to be hang'd ; notwithstanding that this Offender did alledge for himselfe , that hee was de Euangelio , a kinde of Church-man , and therefore did appeale from his Sentence , challenging his priuiledge of beeing tryde by the Ecclesiasticall Power , as by his competent Iudge . But the Iudge being resolu'd , not to reuerse his Sentence , being perswaded , that he likewise falsifide these his Orders , stood to his tackling , and hastened the execution thereof , willing him forth-with to bee ledde to the Gallowes , commanding those that were to see the sentence executed , to hang him out of hand ; charging them to let this be first done de facto , and hee would answere the matter afterwards as well as he might .

The Ecclesiasticall Ordinarie , was not in the meane while wanting on his part , vsing all the power that hee had , to saue this man from death , aggrauating and heaping his Censures vpon the Iudge , threatning him , that in case he proceeded therein , that there should Excommunications goe out , and that in the Churches there should bee Cessatio à Diuinis . But being not able there-with , nor all that hee could doe , to hinder the Sentence ; the Delinquent was brought to the Gallowes , and when hee was vp vpon the Ladder , and had the Rope about his necke , there came a certaine Notary to the foote of the Ladder , who had sollicited his businesse , and laying his hand vpon his brest , said vnto him ;

Sir , you see , all possible diligence hath beene vsed , and not any one essentiall thing left out , that might make for you ; but this ( you see ) will not hold water , nor doe vs that good wee thought it would haue done ; For , as you may perceiue , the Iudge ( out of a wilfull humour ) hath proceeded de facto with you . But I vow and sweare vnto you ( by that my Place and Credit , which I hold in the world ) that hee hath done you therein a most notorious wrong , and contrary to all Law and Iustice ; but seeing it cannot now bee otherwise , and that for the present there is no helpe for it , I shall wish you , Sir , to arme your selfe with patience , and to take your hanging quietly : And put your trust in mee : for I will stay with you to the last , I will not leaue you till I see you hang'd . And leaue it to mee , to right the wrong he hath done you .

Consider now , I pray , and tell me , what comfort can it be to those men that are to suffer death , to heare such idle and foolish words as these to come from a mans mouth ? What pleasure can that miserable wretch , that is forthwith to bee hanged , take , that he hath left a good Sollicitour behinde him , to follow his businesse , when hee is dead and gone ? Mee thinkes , this poore Clyent that suffered , might very well haue said to his Attourney , I should like it much better ( Sir ) that you would come vp heere and take my place , and giue mee leaue to goe and follow mine owne businesse .

To such a one as I , who was rob'd of all that I had , and left so poore as I was , what credit or comfort could I take in it , to see a Thiefe ride vpon an Asse , to haue his hands bound , and his backe whipt , and to bee put to this open shame ? Will his disgrace doe mee any honour ? Or will the repeating either of the case , or his punishment , procure mee meanes to liue , or furnish mee with those necessaries that I want ? I got mee out of that , into another Chamber , thinking vpon the ignorance of these men , and the losse that I had sustained by those that rob'd mee ; for that was the thorne that did so sorely pricke and grieue mee . And as I was thus discoursing with my selfe of diuers and sundry things , one while of this , another while of that : And amongst many other things , that I went examining with my selfe , one ( amongst the rest ) was : Of what small importance , and how light were these kinde of punishments ! For what shame Theeues knew not what shame u. can either bee put into , or taken from a Thiefe , who hath no shame at all , nor makes any reckoning of it ? And who , before that hee begins to play the thiefe , doth resolue with himselfe to receiue that punishment for his theft , wherevnto he shall bee condemned , and shall ( by the Lawes of the Land ) bee inflicted vpon him ? A thiefe ( forsooth ) shall robbe a priuate house ; and all his punishment must be , to walke his publike Stations vp and downe the Towne . A pretty piece of Iustice . For mine owne part , I haue no great store of wit , and lesse iudgement , and therefore I know not well what to say against those Lawes ; which before they were made , I make no question , but they were wel weighed and thought vpon ; and with sound and mature counsell ratified and confirmed . And that before their publication , they were throughly scann'd , and approued by the generall opinion of those , To carry a Felon through a Citie , riding on an Asse , and to whip him , and banish him the Towne , is no fit punishment for him , but rather an incouragement to returne to his former roguery . that were learned in the Lawes ; yet notwithstanding it will not sinke into my head , that this is a sufficient punishment for a Thiefe to leade him onely through the Citie , for to doe him shame , by making him a publike spectacle to the people , or to banish him from thence . But it seemeth vnto mee , to bee rather praemium , then poena , a reward , then a punishment . For thereby , in my iudgement , they doe nothing else , but secretly say vnto him ; My friend , you haue hitherto made your benefit of our goods , and haue made your selfe merry at our cost . You shall now doe well to get your liuing else-where , I pray therefore get you gone , leaue off to doe vs any more harme , and goe robbe some other of our neighbours . I cannot bee perswaded , that this mischiefe lyes in the Lawes , but in those that execute them ; for that they are either ill vnderstood , or not well executed . Wherefore banishment was first inuented .

A Iudge ought to vnderstand and know , as well the man , as the matter for which hee condemneth him . For banishments were not made for theeues that were strangers , but for the Citizens of the said Citie , the naturall Inhabitants , and such as were noble , and well borne , whose persons were not to suffer any publike punishment , nor affronts . And to the end that the faults which they committed , should not bee exempted from punishment , therefore your Diuine Lawes did ordaine these your banishments , which without doubt , was the greatest punishment of all other , that could bee inflicted vpon such kinde of persons . For thereby they are inforced to forgoe their friends , their Parents , their Kinsfolke , their Houses , their Lands , their ancient acquaintance , their Wiues , and their Children , their pleasures , and delights , and their businesses both priuate , and publike ; being to goe , they know not themselues whither , and to liue and conuerse with they know not whom . Which was certainly a great punishment , and no lesse then death itselfe .

And it was the permis●…ion of Heauen , and will of God , that he that made The first inuenter of banishment , banished himselfe . this Law , and was the first Inuenter thereof , should be paid home with the same punishment that hee had ordained for others , beeing banished himselfe by his owne Countrymen the Athenians . Many were much grieued thereat , and indured a great deale of sorrow , accompanied with infinit inconueniences , and perill of their persons ; and many of them likewise did take it no lesse heauily , then if they had suffered the bitter pangs of death .

It is reported of Demosthenes , that famous Grecian Orator , and Prince Demosthenes banished to his great griefe . of Eloquence , being banished by his Citizens , left his Country like a man in desperation , shedding many a sorrowfull teare ; and the more in regard that his fellow Citizens had so cruelly proceeded against him , considering that hee had alwayes protected , fauoured , and defended them , both with his head , and his hand ; his wit , and his strength ; and therefore hee did the more risent it , making these his troubles and afflictions to seeme the more intolerable to be indured .

And as hee was wandring abroad in the world , it was his hap to come to a place , where hee lighted by chance vpon some of the greatest and mortallest Demosthenes cherished by his enemies . enemies that hee had : Who then made no other reckoning with himselfe , but that they would surely kill him ; but they did not onely giue him his life , and pardon all former iniuries , but seeing him in this miserable and afflicted state , taking pitie of him , they comforted him the best they could , treating him with all courtesie and kindnesse , and furnishing him with such things as were necessarie for him in this his banishment . Which was , as it were , a throwing of oyle into the flame ; and the meanes of augmenting his sorrow , to see that hee should bee more kindely vsed by his enemies , then his friends , as did plainely appeare , when beeing comforted by them in this his banishment , he returne●… them this answere :

How would you haue me to carry my selfe ; how beare my banishment Demos●…henes his answer to his friends . with patience ; how not complaine of my hard fortune , hauing so great cause , as I haue to bemone my mis-hap ? Being that I am banished from that Citie , wherein I was borne and bred and am forced by you to seeke my fortune in forraine Countreys , where I meet with such enemies , that I doubt to finde ( and I shall account it a great happinesse vnto me , that I haue made so good a purchase ) the like friends else-where . They likewise banished Themistocles , Themistocles banished , and his saying . who being graced more in Persia , then in Greece , told some priuate friends of his ; Perijssemus , si non perijssemus . We had beene vndone , if wee had not beene vndone .

The Romanes banished Cicero , induced thereunto by his enemie Clodius , Cicero banished . Publius Rutilius banished . He is recalled , but will not come home . anon after that he had freed his Countrie from ruine . They did likewise banish Publius Rutilius , who was so valiant , and of that stoutnesse of courage , that afterwards , when those of Syllas faction ( who were the cause of his exile ) would haue reuersed his banishment , he would not accept of this their faire offer , but said ; I will make them blush for shame , by neglecting this their kindenesse ; for by this meanes , they shall come to see their owne errour , and to acknowledge the wrong they haue done me , by this their vniust persecution . They also banished Scipio Nasica , in requitall of those benefits Scipio banished . and good seruices that he had done them , in deliuering them from the tyranny of the Gracchi . Hannibal the Carthaginian dy'de in Exile . Camillus the Camillus banished . Romance , a man of that worth and valour , that it was said of him , that hee was a second Founder of Rome , for that he had freed it from it's enemies , when the whole State lay at stake to be wonne or lost ; yet notwithstanding this meritorious Act of his , he was banished his Countrie .

The Lacedemonians banished their Licurgus , though a graue and wise Licurgus banished ; b●…aten out with stones , and his eye shooken out . Solon and Thrasibulus banished . man ; and one that had made them very wholsome Lawes for the good of that Common-wealth . Nor did they rest contented with this wrong they had already done him , but they threw stones at him , and strooke out one of his eyes . The Athenians very impudently and vniustly banished their Solon , and confined him to the Iland of Cyprus ; as they did likewise their great Captaine Thrasibulus . These , and infinite other the like were banished ; and anciently they inflicted this punishment vpon the noblest and principallest persons , as one of the greatest and grieuousest punishments which they could impose vpon them .

I my selfe haue knowne a thiefe , who because he was vnder yeeres , and not A iust punishment inflicted on a little young thiefe . capable of greater punishment , hauing beene often-times banished , but neuer went forth of his Countrie to finish this his Exile , and his thefts likewise being of no higher nature then matter of victuals , for his greater punishment , the Iustice commanded , that he should haue a coller of Iron clapt close about his necke , which should be riueted so fast with an Iron pinne , that it should not possibly be taken off , hanging thereat a little Bell , to the end that the ringing thereof , as oft as he did stirre or moue , might giue the people warning to take heed of him . This may truly be called a iust , and a witty-conceited punishment .

Now , by this that hath beene said , thou maist know , how grieuous a punishment banishment is to the good , and how ridiculous a thing to the bad : To whom all the world is their common Countrie ; and who account that to be their Countrie , where they can best filch and steale . For wheresoeuer a thiefe comes , he enters into that place , as a new Commer , and vnknowne ; Which is no small aduantage for him , for the better exercising of his Office , the people not thinking any harme of him , nor suspecting him to be such a one as he is . I know not , how they vnderstand this , who doe punish them thus . It were the lesser euill of the two , to let them goe among the people with the fore-said Coller and Bell , that men might beware of them ; and not to send one thus abroad , where he is vnknowne , with letters as it were of credence , to robbe all the world . No , no , this is no good course , it is not profitable for the Common-wealth , nor is there any policie at all in it , to doe theeues so great a fauour . But for euery light theft , it is fit they should be soundly punished : As to condemne them to the Gallies , to confine them to some Garrison Townes , and there to serue , and to inflict other the like punishments vpon them , for longer or lesse time , according to the nature and qualitie of the offence . And in case they shall be of an inferiour kinde , and not deseruing the weight of your heauiest sentence , I would haue them branded , as the vse is in other Countries , with a hot Iron in the shoulder , that may leaue the print of the marke behinde ; whereby , vpon the second theft they be taken with , it will plainely appeare , what lewd liuers they be . By this course they beare not only the marke about them , but the cause thereof . This will be accusation enough , to giue in euidence against them , both what they are , as also their course of life . And I would haue this re-incidencie and relapse of theirs to be seuerely punished . And many ( I make no question , ) this course being taken and duly executed , will for feare , turne ouer a new leafe , and that this their first correction will keepe them in a great deale the more awe , lest the continuance of their lewd courses , might chance to bring them to the Gallowes . This , and only this ( I say ) is iustice ; all the rest is Frutaregalada , delicious Fruits , and minister only occasion to your Escriuanos , to be as arrant theeues as they ; and I know not whether I may be so bold to say , that they are willing to set them free , that they may goe abroad , and steale afresh , whereby they may afterwards haue occasion to take that from them , which they haue stolne : and so of the two , proue the greater theeues . But I will hold my peace , and harpe no more vpon that string . For I am a man , and may erre , and I haue beene already vnder their hands , and haue suffred too much through their false dealing , and I know not whether I may chance to come againe vnder their lash , and then they will vse their pleasure vpon me , and reuenge themselues on me without controlement : for I know not who can hinder them , when they are disposed to worke their will . My thiefe was freed , he had confest , who were the principall Offenders , and which way they went ; for which cause , as also that he had rounded the Citie on an Asse , and had beene put to open shame , he was set at libertie ; leauing me ( poore man ) in the wretched prison of pouertie : Where I must now take my leaue of you , and bid you all Good night . To morrow morning , if you be desirous of the rest , and would faine know , what in the end was the issue of this businesse ; you shall haue it with all my heart , which I shall truly and faithfully deliuer vnto you .

FINIS .

THE ROGVE : OR , THE SECOND PART OF THE LIFE OF GUZMAN DE ALFARACHE . THE SECOND BOOKE . Wherein Guzman de Alfarache , treateth of that which befell him in Italie , till he returned into Spaine .

CHAPTER I.

Guzman de Alfarache , leaues Siena , and goes for Florence . He meets with Sayavedra , whom he takes into his seruice . And before he comes to Florence , he recounts vnto him on the way , many admirable things concerning that 〈◊〉 . And when he was arriued there , he shewes him all , that was worth the seeing .

PHOCION ( a famous Philosopher in his time ) Phocion , and his pouertie . was so poore , that though he tooke a great deale of paines , he could hardly get wherewithall to hold life and soule together . Whereupon , as oft as any in the presence of Dionysius the Tyrant , Dionyfius the Tyrant . and his mortall enemie , made mention either of himselfe , or of the manner and course of his life , he made a scoffe and a iest both at it , and him , flouting at his pouertie , and deriding his miserie , thinking with himselfe , that he could not doe him any greater disgrace , nor iniure him more , then to mocke at the meannesse of his fortunes . As if he would haue inferred thereupon , that if he had beene a man of that great learning , as the world held him to be , he might therewith haue gained bread to put in his mouth , and not needed to liue in that want , as now he did .

When this came to the Philosophers eare , he was not only not grieued Phocions censure of Dionysius . thereat , but laughing at this his follie , he answered him , that reported this vnto him ; It is true sir , that Dionysius sayes of me , in terming me poore , for I am truly so ; but , I must tell you withall , that he is much poorer , then my selfe , and hath a great deale more reason to be asham'd of himselfe , if he shall but consider his owne wretched estate and condition . For though I lacke money , I want not friends : I abound in the more , and faile in the lesse . But as for Friends are the greatest treasure . him , though he be rich in money , he is poore of friends . For I know not any one that he hath . This Philosopher could not satisfie himselfe better , nor with a righter or fuller blow hit out his eyes , then by stiling him , hominem sine amicis ; A man , that had not so much as one friend in the world , that he could truly say , was his friend . And albeit , it oftentimes so falleth out , that they are How friend ▪ are often got , and kept . purchased with money , and that this is a principall meanes to winne and wedge them vnto vs , yet this Tyrant had neuer yet the wit either to get or keepe them . And it is no wonder , that he should , of all other , want them . For he , that sayes friend , sayes ( in that one word ) Goodnesse , and Vertue ; comprehending in that all the good , that speech , or thought , can reach vnto . Whosoeuer therefore shall desire to conserue friendship , and to continue in his friends loue , and that the bond of amitie be not broken betweene them , must haue a care , that his workes correspond with his words . But Dionysius , being tyrannie it selfe , and of too ill a digestion to keepe friendship long , and his conuersation being worse then his concoction ; and for that friends are not so much gotten out of the greatnesse of our fortune , as our vertue ; wanting that , he wanted them .

For mine owne part , euer since I had the vse of reason , and knew what discretion He that hath friends , hath all things . was , I made it my chiefest studie , to get me friends , though at neuer so deare a rate , thinking no cost too much , to purchase so great a treasure . They seeming vnto me ( as indeed they are ) our greatest helps and comfort , as well in prosperous , as a duerse fortune . Who doth enioy the content of contents , but he that hath true friends ? What doth so much lengthen and preserue our peace , our life , our honour , and our wealth , as to see our friends to ioy with vs in our prosperitie ? And in aduersitie , from whom , but from them , can we finde any refuge , kindnesse , comfort , helpe , and a fellow-feeling of our miseries , as if they were their owne ? A wise man , ought to want all whatsoeuer goods , rather then good friends . For they are better then our neerest kinsmen , or our Friends better 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 or ●…thers . owne naturall brothers .

Of the qualities , and conditions of friendship , many haue spoken much ( and one day , God willing , we shall say something thereof : ) but in my opinion , where friendship is professed , there must be all true and plaine dealing , and such a faire and euen cariage , that it neither leane to alteration , nor giue any offence , nor cause any trouble , nor to aduenture ( through our rasn and inconsiderate actions ) the loosing of a friend . Two friends ought so to loue one another , as each of them doth seuerally loue himselfe . For that I , and my friend , are as it were all one . And as you see , how quick-siluer dealeth with True friends what they are like . gold , how close it adheres vnto it , how it workes it selfe into the very entrailes and bowels of it , and being two diuers mettals , are so incorporated , that they become but one masse or lumpe , nothing in the world being able to sunder and diuide them but the pure fire of the furnace , wherein the quick-siluer is consumed : So a true friend , who is now become another mans selfe , and by an intermixture of their hearts and mindes made as it were one selfe-same thing , nothing ought , nor can indeed dissolue this vnion , but death , which is the Chrysoll , wherein we must at last be all melted one after another .

Man ought to make the same choise of their friends , as they doe of good bookes . For their happinesse consists not neither in the greatnesse of their How to make choise of our friends . number , nor the curiousnesse of their binding , but rather to haue a few , and those good and approued Authors . For oftentimes , it so falleth out , that many friends are rather a hinderance , then a helpe to true friendship : For he is a friend to none , that is a friend to all . Nor are we to choose a friend for our entertainment only , and merrily to spend the time withall , but to make choise of such a one , as may benefit both our soule , and our bodie : one that without respect of humane interest , will aduise him to obserue the diuine precepts . Not only to represent them vnto him , but to speake to the purpose , to admonish him to the obseruation of them , and to instruct him in the true knowledge of them . And if he be called a true friend , who meerely out of friendship , tells his friend the naked truth without masking or disguising it , not as to a third person , but as to one , that is properly his owne , and as freely as if he should treat of any thing belonging to himselfe , or that he himselfe would desire , his friend should say the same to him , on the same occasion , of which sort of friends , that carry that sinceritie and plainenesse with them , few are now a dayes to be found , in whom a man may haue that assured confidence , and entire satisfaction .

Then questionlesse ( and that with very good reason ) a good booke is a Bookes , true friends . good friend ; nay I dare boldly say , there cannot be a better . For from thence , we may draw that vtile & necessarium , that good and necessarie counsell , which we stand in need of , without incurring the shame , of that vaine and idle humour , which is too common now a dayes , to be rather content to continue still in ignorance , then by asking the question , to seeme to doubt of any thing . But to bookes , we may boldly put the question , and neuer need to be afraid , that they will bewray our ignorance : And besides , we shall receiue this satisfaction from them , that they will faithfully , without flatterie , deliuer vs their opinion . And this one aduantage ( and it is a notable one ) bookes haue of friends : That our friends , dare not alwayes tell vs what they thinke , and know ; for feare of particular interest , or out of tendernesse to offend ( as we shall by and by briefly tell you ) their friends . So soft a hand hath Loue , when it comes to touch , where it loues . Whereas on the contrary , the counsell that is giuen thee in bookes , is downe-right and plaine , and stands before thee starke-naked , as bestript of all manner of vice . And therefore ( these things considered ) it hath euer beene held one of the hardest and difficultest things in the world , to finde out a true and faithfull friend .

Of which sort , many are spoken of in ancient stories , and we finde a great number of them recorded of olde , and painted forth vnto vs in your feigned fables ; but that there either now are , or haue beene such heretofore as are there decyphered vnto vs , I doubt it very much , at least I am fully perswaded , they were very rare and few . One only friend haue I found to be true , and is One only friend . And what that friend is . of the same nature and condition , as we are . And this friend of ours , is the best , the bountifullest , the truest , and the faithfullest of all other ; for this is neuer wanting to it's friend , but continues firme and constant for euer , nor is at any time weary of giuing : And this good friend of ours , ( that I may not hold you any longer in suspence ) is the Earth .

This affords vs pretious stones , gold , siluer , and diuers other mettals , whereof we stand in need , and so earnestly thirst after . It bringeth forth grasse , and A commendation of the Earth , and i●… faithfull loue , and true friendship . all sorts of herbes , wherewith are not only fed our flocks of sheepe , our cattell , and other beasts for the vse and seruice of man , but those medicinable simples , which conserue our health , free vs from diseases , and if we fall into sicknesse , set vs vpright againe , preseruing this life of ours , in a sound and perfect state of health . It yeeldeth vs all sorts of fruits , that are either sauourie to the taste , or nourishable to the bodie . It giues vs wooll , and flax , and by consequence , all kinde of wouen stuffes , wherewith we cloath , and adorne , this naked flesh of ours . It opens its owne veines of its owne accord , whilest from its f●…ll brests , sprout forth those sweet and delicate waters , which we drinke ; those brookes and riuers , which get the fields with childe , and make them fruitfull , and not only that , but doth facilitate commerce , and make an easie way for trafficke , bringing the strangest and remotest parts of the world to shake hands , and to communicate their commodities one with another , and to liue in a league of loue and friendship together . Nay more , it is so good , and so sweet a friend , that it suffereth , and willingly consenteth to all that we will our selues . Be shee well or ill vsed by vs , all is one to her , so as we be pleased . Shee is like a sheepe , from whom you shall heare no other language , but Omnia bene : All is well . Leade her forth to feed , or bring her to the waters to drinke ; shut , and penne her vp , or let her loose ; take her lambkin from her , her milke , her wooll , nay her very life , to all shee alwayes answers bien : all is well . And all that bien , or good that we haue on earth , the Earth giues it vs . And for an vpshot of all , when we are now dead , and lye stinking aboue ground , when there is neither wife , father , sonne , kinsman , nor friend , that will abide and endure our companie any longer , but doe all of them vtterly forsake vs , and flie from vs ; then , euen then , doth not shee refuse vs , but huggs vs , and makes much of vs , and opening her owne wombe , takes vs in vnto her , where we quietly lye , as it were in deposito , till shee render afterwards a faithfull account of what shee hath receiued , and deliuers vs vp to a new and eternall life . And amongst many her other excellencies , one of the worthiest things in her , and deseruing most commendation , is ; That shee doing so much for vs , as shee doth , and that so continually and without ceasing , being so generous , and so franke-hearted , that shee is neuer tyred out , neuer growes weary , yet doth shee not looke for any requitall , shee neither askes , nor expects any returne of kindnesse , nor doth shee talke and tell of it , nortwit thee in the teeth with it ; which some kinde of friends , more vsually , then commendably , doe .

Amongst so many friends , as I had , and did daily conuerse withall , I found very few , who had not an eye to the north-starre of their owne proper interest , and shap't their course by the Compasse of their owne priuate ends ; hauing only a desire to deceiue , not hauing any respect at all to the friendship they profest , being devoide of all loue , truth , and shame : I was of an easie and tractable nature , my condition was facile and ●…pt to be mis-led , their tongue was all honie , but their heart was very gall it selfe : whose bitternesse , I had too often tasted to my cost .

Considering therefore the falshood that now adayes is vsed in friendship , and mens craftie and subtle cariage , we are not so much to wonder that we are ; as , that we are not deceiued . For I finde them , as liberall in promising , as niggardly in performing ; as facile in their words , as difficile in their deeds . There are now no more Pilades , nor Orestes ; they are dead and gone ; and with them , almost the remembrance , that there were euer any such kinde of men . I only speake this for my Pompeyos sake ; whom I therfore condemne the more , for that I lou'd him more then any other , and tooke him to be my especiall friend . For , most of my friends , I gained by my words , but this man , I presum'd I had purchast by my deeds . When I was in my prosperitie , I had many friends , all men did desire my loue , made much of me , feasted me , and did offer their seruice vnto me : But my moneys failing , they also failed ; so that their friendship , and my money had an end at once . The greatest miserie that can befall man in this life .

And as there is no misfortune , that toucheth vs so neere , as to call to minde the happy estate , wherein heretofore we did liue ; so there is not any sorrow , that equals that , of being forsaken by those friends , whose loue and friendship we did euer desire to conserue . That little wealth that I had , was stolne from me , which was my vndoing . I continued some dayes ( though but a few ) in my friends house , how beit he thought them too many ; in which short time , he fell off from me by degrees , by a little and a little vnwedging himselfe from me , and vnloosing those knots , which had knit vs in friendship together ; finding at last , that I had but a slipperie eele in my hand , who when I thought A feigned friend , compared to an Ecle. I had surest hold of him , slipt when he saw his time from me , leauing my hand empty . He was a Cordouese , in the freenesse of his offers ; and would say vnto me after that we had dined ; Sir , is there any thing else , that you would be pleased to command ? If there be , I pray Sir make as bold of any thing this house affords , as if it were your owne . But these were but generall words , and matter of complement ; for he went not vpon certainties , nor promised me any thing , that I might trust vnto , but did rather seeme to proffer this his kindnesse doubtfully and fearefully , lest I might chance to take him at his word . And that little curtesie , which he shewed me , was not so much out of any hearty good will , that he had to doe it , as for feare lest I should seeke to recouer my lost goods of him , by course ofLaw .

I read his thoughts in his lookes : And as mine were alwayes noble , so on the contrary , his were base and vile . And as oft as he spake of my losse , if he vsed any complement with me , it was all dissimulation , and counterset stuffe . Well , whatsoeuer it were , either better or worse , I was much offended at it , and thought that he did me therein a great deale of wrong , and did seriously risent this his double dealing , and these faire but false showes of his loue . But he , on the other side , did as earnestly persist in the pursuit of his simulations , as if he had meant nothing lesse , then to play vpon me , and abuse me ; or as if they had some ground of truth with them : And because I stoutly stood to it , and bore out this businesse as well as I could , that he might not perceiue any deiectednesse in me , he tooke heart thereupon , and made sleight of it , as a matter of little , or no importance . For the losse was mine , and not his ; and therefore he made the lesse reckoning of it .

Wherefore , that I might not giue him farther trouble , perceiuing how much perplexed he was , and how willing to be rid of me , I resolued with my selfe to free him of that feare , and to goe for Florence . I imparted this my purpose vnto him , telling him , that I much desired to see that Citie , for the great commendation , that I had heard of it , and those famous sights that were there to be seene . And because this my determination suted with his desire , he tooke hold on this occasion , relating vnto me many memorable things , worthy my sight , wherewith my will was the more inflamed , and the desire which I had to see it , much increased . But he did not doe this so much , to commend it vnto me , or out of any good desire , that he had , that I should see it , but only that he might see me no more in his house ; and for that he is an vnwelcome a a Es tr●…ste hu●…ped , el de por fuerça . guest , Prouerbe that is a mans guest against his will . After that I had thus broken my minde vnto him , he began to blow the winde afresh of his kinde vsage of me , that he might oblige me thereby to get me the sooner out of his house , and to depart from thence peaceably and quietly ; for he was not a little afraid of me . He Prouerbe . then signified vnto me , how sorry he was that I would needs be gone ; but vsed no intreaties , nor any the least resistance , to haue me to stay . He demanded of me , when I was minded to begin my iourney , but neuer asked , what I wanted ; which he might haue done out of good manners , though he had no meaning to pleasure me . Which proffer , had he made it me , it should not haue beene performed by him so much out of complement and ceremonie , as that he might thereby learne , how long , or how little a while I meant to stay with him , not knowing as yet the houre , when I me●…nt to be gone . It is an easie b b Facil cosa es , el ver ; y mas lo es , el hablar ; pero muy dificultoso es proveer . - No conocen todos los , que miran , m●…los que hablan , hazen . Manymake reckning of their friend , no longer then they haue need of him . And when he can serue his turne no longer , he turnes him off . thing , to see ; more easie , to speake ; but it is a hard thing to fore-see . For all that see , doe not know ; and all that speake , doe not doe . And for that he now saw , that he should haue no farther need of me , for that I like a foole , told him ere I was aware , that I was not minded to returne any more to Rome , he began to cast with himselfe , What good can this cocks-combe doe me now ? or of what vse and profit will this foole be vnto me hereafter ? And so from that time forward , he vsed me accordingly , which was no worse , then mine owne indiscretion deserued . Then did I learne to my cost , how a man may come to know a generous and noble minde ; which is seene in nothing more then in a thankfull acknowledgment of benefits already receiued .

In this alteration of fortune , there were set before mine eyes a thousand dangers , that I neuer dream't of . But because I had as yet so much spirit left me , as was able to put me forward , I was not vtterly dismaid , nor quite dishartned . I studied to forget that , which I could not helpe ; making my meanes , the thinking on my iourney . And because noueltie , and things of a strange nature , doe draw the mindes of men after them , out of the desire that they haue to know them , I made all the haste I could to get me gone from Siena , as well out of this respect , as also that I might leaue Pompeyo well pleased therewith ; who , I knew , would neuer thinke himselfe well at ease , till he were well eased of me . For albeit men commonly say to their guests ; I pray fall to your meat , and be merry , for I assure you , you are heartily welcome ; yet whether you be merry , or not merry , welcome , or not welcome , they thinke you are bound vnto them for a meales meat , and put euery morsell to account , that goes downe thy threat .

This hoggishnesse of his , this his vnciuill cariage , this dissembled care of his , and this his great feare that he had , that I would continue longer with him , did much trouble me . Well , I tooke my leaue of him ; and because I was still the same man , as I was wont to be , as also in regard of that loue and friendship , which I truly bore vnto him , at the time of this our departure each from other , I did so grieue thereat , that I was not able to speake a word , no not so much as to bid him , farewell ; yet could not this my inward sorrow , draw so much as one teare into his eyes , or to make any the least show of griefe . And so all alone , I set forward on my iourney , but more then well accompanied with Guzman leaues Siena , and goes to Florence . a world of melancholy thoughts , nor slightly attended by a multitude of cares , wherewith I was so ouer-laden , that my horse was ready to sinke vnder me , as vnable to beare so great a burthen . And therefore I rode plotting and deuising with my selfe , how I might make them lighter , and so case both my selfe and my horse of them .

I had not gone thus musing many miles , but it was my hap to light on Sayavedra , Guzman meets with Sayavedra . who had left Siena to cumply with his banishment . Whom I no sooner saw , but my kinde heart began to melt , and I could not chuse but take compassion of him , and withall I must needs salute him ; placing my eyes , not vpon the hurt , which he had done me , but on the harme , from which he once had freed me . Esteeming more of that kindnesse I then receiued from him , then Curtesies are to be returned with aduantage . of all that , that he had rob'd me of . And he is a bad pay-master , and doth ill deserue a curtesie , who doth not with aduantage requite a receiued kindnesse . Besides ; Liberalitie , supposeth a generous and noble spirit , and is of that high esteeme , for that it is originally descended from heauen , that it is alwayes found in those mindes , that are destinated thereunto . I could not for my life refraine from speaking louingly vnto him , nor he abstaine from receiuing me with teares , which guttring downe his cheekes , dropt downe vpon my feet , as he bowed him-selfe to kisse my stirrop , whereof he taking fast hold , fell downe on Sayavedra asks Guzman forgiuenesse . his knees , crauing pardon for this his error , humbly and earnestly beseeching me , that I would be pleased to forgiue him ; rendring me likewise thanks , that during the time of his imprisonment , I neuer offred to accuse him ; excusing himselfe also , that he had not , as soone as he was set at libertie , come to visit me , laying the fault thereof , in his lacke of boldnesse , and the largenesse of his offence . Yet , for to make satisfaction and payment of this his debt , he would become my slaue , and doe me faithfull seruice all the dayes of his life ; I , who euer knew him to be a man , that had both a strong braine , and a nimble wit , which d●… him rather hurt , then good , because he did not well imploy them ; yet , for that these did adapt him , and make him fit for any imployment whatsoeuer , I was the more willing to accept of his offer . And so taking him into Guzman entertaines Sayavedra for his seruant . my seruice , we ioggd on along by little and little like a couple of good fellowes , talking of diuers things on the way .

And albeit I was not ignorant , that he was a notorious theefe , and a notable cunning rogue , yet I held it the lesser inconuenience of the two , to haue a knaue , then a foole , to my man . For foolishnesse did neuer yet but walke hand Better to haue a ●…naue , then a fo●…c , to ones seruant . in hand with wickednesse . And both of them being ioyned together , are sufficient to vndoe not only a priuate house , but a whole Common-wealth . For the simple , or foolish man , cannot keepe counsell , nor knowes when and where to hold his peace ; nor the wicked and malitious man , to iudge of things a●…ght ; and if either of them , vttereth what he thinketh , ( for commonly their tongue blabbeth , what their heart conceiueth ) scandals , and troubles are already entred within the doores of our house , and like impudent rogues , sticke not to presse into our priuatest roomes , to see what they can get from thence . I thought with my selfe , if I would haue any one to serue me , ( good seruants being so few , and so hard to be got ) that this would be lesse b●…d then any other , because by those his cunning tricks , that he had plaid with me already , he made me the more warie of him , and taught me ( ●…s if I had beene some Lacedemonian ) Prouerbe . to throw my beard c c Tract la barba 〈◊〉 el hombro Viv●… recatado , v con re●…e o , como hazen los que ●…enen euenugos , que van bolviendo el rostro , à vn lado , y a o ro. de onde , naçio el re●…n . Couarr . verb. Barba . ouer my shoulder : that is , to haue an eye vnto him , and to be the more circumspect and warie of him , and to take the better heed , looking still behinde me , as those doe that haue enemies , turning their head one while this way , another while that , that they may not be set vpon vn-awares . And therefore knowing him so well as I did , I thought it as good , if not better , to entertaine a knaue that I knew , as a knaue , that I knew not . For I knew well enough , that I must looke narrowly to his water , and watch him at euery turne , wherein I meant not to be negligent : Whereas , in taking of another , that should seeme to beare the face of an honest man , and make show of being faithfull and trustie vnto me , I might haply grow carelesse out of the confidence that I haue in him , and by this my credulitie be coozened of all that I had , and afterwards be left to looke after moone-shine in the water .

As well in this respect , as also for that I had not much now to lose , nor was my condition or qualitie such , that I should stand so nicely vpon these points , I admitted him into my seruice . He askt me ( as soone as I had entertained him ) which way I meant to take ? I told him , I was for Florence , led thither out of a desire that I had to satisfie my longing , by seeing that Citie , whereof I had heard ●…o much . Whereunto my seruant replied , and said ; Sir , whatsoeuer you haue heard thereof , I make no question , when you come there , but your selfe will confesse , report hath beene too short with you . For I assure you , there are so many admirable things therein to be seene , that they cannot sufficiently be commended . For the naked relations of things , that are curious and good indeed , neuer fill the vacuitie and emptinesse of our desires . I haue liued there some time , yet all the while as I remained there , as if I had beene but come that very day to towne , wheresoeuer I went , new things were still offered to my view : and I would neuer with my good will haue left that Towne , if my friends had not forced me from thence .

I began to aske him some questions , touching the foundation of that Citie , and whence it had its first beginning ? Sir ( said he ) seeing we haue day enough before vs , and that we may talke and walke faire and softly , and that the relation , which I am to make you is but short ; I shall , for the better satisfying of your desire , acquaint you , and that truly , with all those curiosities , that did then offer them-selues vnto my knowledge .

Then did he forth with begin to discourse of those ciuill warres , which were Sayavedra discourses of F●…orence . occasioned by Catiline , betweene those of Fiesole , and Florence ; the o●…erthrowes , which one while those of the Romane faction receiued , another while their enemie , Bela Totile . How in the time of Pope Leo the third , the Emperor Leo 3. Pope . Charles the Great , sent a great Armie against the Fiesolani , leauing Florence reedified in the hands of the Florentines , till that Pope Clement the seuenth , and C●…olus Magnus Emperor . Clem●… 7. Pope . Charles 5. Emperor . the Emperor Charles the fifth recouered the same , for to restore it to its ancient possession , from which the house of the Medics had beene put out . Which succeeded in the yeere of our Lord , 1529. Euer since which time , the Florentines haue alwaies been gouerned by one sole Prince ; which , though it seemed somewhat harsh vnto them at the first , yet now they see their error , and finde now at length how much more quietly they liue vnder the protection of their owne Prince , and with how much more safetie , both of their liues and goods . It is said , that the first Prince , that euer they had , was Alessandro de Medici ; who , for his sweetnesse of nature , his magnanimitie , and valour , though violently he Alessandro de Medici . lost that principalitie in the very flower of his youth , yet might he justly be termed Alessandro . After him , succeeded , that wise , and worthy Cosimo , great Duke of Tuscanie , whose memoriall , for his heroicall actions , and great vertues , Cosimo , great Duke of Tuscanie . as also for his courteous behauiour , his religion , and good gouernment , shall liue eternally in the mindes of the liuing . This Prince was succeeded by Francesco , who , for that he died without issue , the Crowne came to that famous Francesco 2. Duke of Florence . Ferdinando 3. ●…eat Duke . Ferdinando his brother , the liuely image , and true picture of his father Cosimo , being as well heire to his Vertues , as his Estate . Who gouerned so worthily , and so wisely , that I doe not know any other , with whom I may equall him , for the loue that his subiects bare him .

If th●… relation , he then made me , had beene a little longer , he must of force haue deferr'd it till the next day ; but it seemed , that he had measured it out iust with the time : for we were come as neere night , as we were to our Inne●… whereinto we went to lodge . And hauing there well rested and refresht our selues , we got vp betimes in the morning , and that we might the sooner get into Florence , we did set the best foot before , and made a little more haste , then otherwise we would haue done . But when we came within sight of it , I was The beauty of Florence . so ouer-ioyed , that I am not able to expresse it , so faire and so beautifull did it a farre of present it selfe vnto me . For though I could not take a full view of it , yet from the one end to the other , and from almost the bottome to the top , I might reasonably well discerne it ; and a more pleasing sight , did mine eyes neuer see . I did examine the pleasantnesse of its situation , I beheld the beauty of many great and goodly buildings , the inexpugnable strength of its stately walls , the maiestie , and firmnesse of its high , and well formed Towers . In a word , the whole pile thereof , seemed such vnto me , that I stood amazed at it , and could not ( me thought ) too much admire it . I would not willingly , haue mou'd out of the place where I stood , nor haue drawne neerer to the Towne , but haue kept my selfe at that very distance ; as well , for that mine eye was wonderfull well pleased therewith , as also for that I would not wrong that delight , which I now receiued , when I should draw neerer thereunto ; if peraduenture ( as it vsually falleth out with most things ) it should lessen it selfe , and fall short of that goodly prospect , which I did here enjoy .

But , when I did consider with my selfe , that all this glorious show , was , but as it were the outward case of it , my iudgement did then begin to instruct me , that the iewels therein contained , must needs be richer , and faire more glorious , as indeed they were . For , when I was entred thereinto , and saw the spatiousnesse of the streets , how streight and leuell they were , how plaine and smooth , paued all with cleane hewen stones of goodly faire marble , and their houses built with beautifull stones , so costly , so curious , so nearly polished , so artificially wrought , and with such a deale of skill and cunning , in the architecture thereof , I was so confounded , that I could not tell what to thinke of it . For I could not imagine with my selfe , that any other Citie in the world , could haue compar'd with Rome for beauty : But hauing well viewd this , for its bignesse , it goes farre beyond it . For those buildings that are in Rome , the best of them are gone to ruine , and few of them left standing ; and those that are now remaining , are but meere shadowes , and the very ruines and fragments of those , that were so famous in former times . But Florence , is the flower of the world , all is therein so flourishing , so costly , and so well set forth , that I said vnto Sayavedra ; Certainly , if the inhabitants of this Citie be as curious in the tricking of their women , as they are in the adorning , and beautifying of their houses , they are vndoubtedly the happiest men in the world . I was so strucken with admiration , that I was desirous to haue dwelt a long time in contemplating and beholding euery particular peece of building ; but because night was now growing on , and that the day would not befriend vs any longer , I was faine to retire my selfe to my lodging . And we were not slacke in hastning to our Inne , whither when we were come , we were so neatly and so daintily entertained , that I cannot so much indeare it , as it truly deserueth . Such plenty of prouision , such cleanlinesse in their lodging-chambers , such sweetnesse in their linnen , such diligent attendance , such affable language , and such good vsage , did I neuer meet withall else-where in all my life . I was so taken therewith , that it made me almost to forget that which I most desired . I slept so soundly that night ( thankes to the good bed , that was vnder me ) that it seemed vnto me scarce halfe an houre , since my first lying downe .

When the morning was come , ( though with a heart full of sorrow , for that was then my Mount Tabor ) I call'd to Sayauedra , to giue me my clothes ; and for that he was so well acquainted with that Citie , I will'd him to make himselfe ready to goe along with me , that he might show me all , whatsoeuer was of any note , and held ( as curiosities ) to be worth the seeing . And that first of all he should bring me to the chiefe Church , where hauing heard diuine seruice , and recommended our selues vnto God , all things would prosper afterwards the better with vs . Thither he led me , and hauing ended our deuotion , I stood like one amaz'd in beholding that most famous Temple and fabricke del b b Zimborio , es el hucco del chapitel . Zimborio , which they there call c c A high Arche , or round vault of any high Church or sleeple . The Cupuls of Florence what a curious peece of building it is . Cupula , which in my opinion , may be better termed Copula , for that it seemed not only to my selfe , but as many as beheld it , that therein was copulated , and ioyned as it were together , all that curious Architecture , which the writings of the best and skilfullest professors , in that profession , either theoricke , or practicke , haue published to the world , so admirable a peece of workmanship , such a deale of greatnesse , strength , and curiositie , ( without any wrong or iniurie to any other fabricke of Europe ) may iustly challenge the name of the eighth wonder of the world . Let him consider with himselfe , who hath any knowledge in Architecture , it being foure hundred and twenty handfuls high , besides the spire that is on the top of it , what d d Diame●…o , of the Greeke word 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 . Linea diemtiens , seu per medium secane , recta in longitudine ducta . It is a Geometricall terme . The Annoncits of Florence , wonderfull worth the seeing . diameter , this Cupula will require ; and by this he may come to guesse , what manner of thing it is .

From thence I went to the Annunciata , a Church so called , to see the image , that was painted there vpon the wall , which might more properly be termed Heauen ; so admirable a peece of worke , is that picture of the Incarnation of the Sonne of God : Insomuch that it is held there for certaine , that it was drawne by one , that was no lesse excellent in his Art , then holy in his life . For , when he had made an end of that which there you see painted , and that there remained no more to be done , but to finish and make vp the face of our blessed Lady the Virgin ; being wonderfull timerous and fearefull , much misdoubting and musing with himselfe , whether or no , he should be able to giue it its true life , and to fit it euery way in its age , in truenesse of its colour , its complexion , in its honest and sober countenance , and in the demure and modest posture of its eyes , in this confusion of his , and these his distracted thoughts , not deuising with himselfe , what he were best to doe , he laid himselfe downe a while to sleepe , and awaking anon after , and minding to betake him to his pensill , and to put his hand ( by the helpe of God ) to the peece of worke , he found it made to his hand . And therefore , it needs not our farther commendation , for it being to be presupposed , that it was there miraculously wrought either by Gods owne hand , or some one of his Angels , it can be said to be no lesse , then an Angelicall picture . And for this cause , the rest of that peece being considered , which the Painter made , we may easily conceiue , what kinde of spirit he had , who could finde so much fauour , as to haue the hands of heauen ( as if for the time , they had beene bound prentises to his Trade ) to helpe him to grinde and mixe his colours , and to make an end of his worke for him .

So many miracles doth it daily worke , such a concourse of people doth continually flocke thither out of deuotion , and so great are the almes , that are there distributed & giuen to the poore , that I did much wonder , that all the beggars were not wondrous rich ; which put me in minde of that poore man , who ( as I was told , and you haue heard ) made in this Citie , that his famous last Will and Testament , wherein he bequeathed his Asses pack-saddle to the Great Duke ; That seeming now vnto me but a little small summe , in comparison of that , which such a one as he , might very well haue gained in that place . And for that it is a knowne truth , Que el hijo de la gata , ratones mata : That the sonne of a Cat , will kill his Rat. Or ( as our English Prouerbe hath it ) Cat will to his kinde ; a thousand , and a thousand times , did I bethinke my selfe of many things that I had done in my younger dayes , and did now as it were plainely perceiue ; that if , as I went to Rome , it had beene my good hap to haue lighted in this Citie , what with my roguish tricks , my counterfeit scurffs , leprosies , and fore legs , I might haue come to be a mayorazgo amongst them , and to haue purchased some great Lordship .

I did likewise obserue , that few of these rogues , were curious , and cunning , Guzman scoffes at the rogues and beggars in Florence . or that they were their crafts-masters ; but were , for the most part , fooles , meere block-heads , and had little or no wit at all , in comparison of those in my time . And when I did perceiue , what poore counterfeits they were , and how sillily they did order their affaires , it was sport alone to me . I tooke a great deale of pleasure in looking on them , and I did secretly wish to my selfe , that I might haue had the opportunitie , to reforme a thousand imperfections , which I presently saw in them . Who did euer see , that an honest poore beggar , that was a good proficient in his trade , nay , say he were neuer so meanely bred to it , would when he had most , ( vnlesse he were a very cocks-combe ) haue more then six , or seuen Maranedis , or some such like trifle , and not about , in his hat ? nor to haue such a summe of money lie open to the peoples eye , that they may thereby be taught to tell him ; you need no more , you haue as much there already , as will very well serue to supply your wants for this day , and to put bread enough in your belly ; and therefore , that he should get him gone , and giue way to other poore folkes , that had more need , then he had ? When was it euer knowne , that there was euer seene any beggar , of that poore vnderstanding , though he were but a new beginner , that would beg , hauing a loafe of bread vnder his arme ? or to stand , as I saw another , with a tooth-pick in his care ? Which I no sooner saw , but I said to my selfe : O thou poore silly theefe , thou traitor to thy profession ; Art thou such an Asse , as to let euery man know , that thou hast eaten so much , that there are some remnants yet left behinde in thy teeth ? I saw not one amongst them all , that could play his game handsomely , nay scarce know how to set his men in their right place , nor to take their due time for the hitting of a blot ; I saw no order , no decorum amongst them ; they had no skill in this kinde of musicke ; many of them could say their Gammoothe , ( and that too they had learned by rote ) but knew not how to proue a note ; others there were , that had a little paltry skill in plaine-song , but would bawle it out so scuruily and so vntuneably , that no care was able to endure it : And none of all this dunghill crew , that like Chaunticleere , could chaunt it out lustily , descant and diuide at pleasure , and so to relish and melt their notes , as to make their hearts to melt that heare them , and to moue them to compassion of them .

There did I spie a young man , one of my old acquaintance , who was now a Guzman spies one of his old acquaintance amongst the beggars in Florence . pretty well-growne man ; this was the only beggar ( I meane compared with the rest ) that knew any thing amongst them . And would to God ( thought I ) that I might be so happy , as to come once to set my hands , where he had set his heart . For questionlesse , he could not chuse but be rich . He was the sonne of such parents , as were able to leaue him much . His father was a notable cunning rogue , and could his craft wonderfull well . And this his sonne , was euery way like vnto him . He was leane visag'd , lanke bellied , spindle-shank'd , and so alike suted in all the rest , that a man might truly say of him ; That , t' was fathers n'owne sonne . But because euery thing hath its time appointed , and takes it course when it comes , and for that the Iustice did not there permit , the hauing of an Academie , for the trayning vp of these fresh men , what through want of exercise , and not trying of conclusions , and putting them in practise , they may now throw away their caps , whilest themselues with their breviaticke Art , may lie wallowing in the durt . I knew him , but he did not know me : He might well say vnto me , Tal●…e veo , que no te conosco : The world is so changed Prouerbe . with thee , that I doe not know thee . O , what a terrible conflict had I with my selfe , what a shrewd temptation , to goe and speake to him : but I durst not . I said to Sayavedra ; Seest thou that poore fellow ? That rogue is able to make me rich . He then said vnto me ; Why doth he then goe a begging ? I told him ; Why beggars cannot giue ouer their lewd course of life . When men haue once begun to open their mouthes to craue an almes , and haue shut their eyes to all shame , and bound their hands from all labour , and that their feet are benum'd , and wax stiffe from taking any paines , or care to liue in a lawfull course , their disease is beyond all cure , and there is no remedie to redresse this euill .

The experience whereof I saw in a poore young wench in my time , who comming to Rome poore and sicke , fell a begging for Gods sake . And when shee A notable tale of a roguish wench . was well recouer'd of her health , and as strong of her bodie , as any bull , shee still continued her trade of begging . They , whose almes shee craued , told her , it was shame for her to beg , shee was young , and lustie , and was able to serue , and worke for her liuing . Shee answered ; that shee was often troubled with a cruell paine and griping of the heart , which when the fitt tooke her , caused her to fall downe to the ground in a swound , beating her feet and her hands against the earth , renting and tearing all that shee could lay hand on , and kicking and spurning at those that came neere her . In this sort , did shee cozen the world a long time , and spent many yeeres in this lewd fashion , till at last one of her owne Countrymen being askt , whether he knew her father , and her mother ? Answered , He did ; And that they were both dead , and had left her a great deale of wealth . Whereunto ( as lawfull Inheretrix ) shee laid claime . Whose estate was now such , and so great , that many principall men became Sutors vnto her , and sought to haue her to wife , and some of them exceeding rich ( for there is no e e No ay hierr●… tan mal●… , que no puede dorarse . Todo lo cubre , y tapa el oro . yron so foule , that it will not be guilded ; gold hides and Prouerbe . couers all , be it neuer so rustie ) shee was penny-white ( as we say ) and so was married in the end to one of an honest condition , and well to liue , and an handsome man withall . But this wife of his , seeing shee was now depriued of her wonted libertie of begging , grew within a little while after desperately sicke , daily withering and wasting away , the Physitians not being able to search into the nature of her disease . And thus shee continued for a good while , till shee became her owne physitian , and cured her selfe , by playing the hypocrite , making solemne profession , that meerely out of humilitie , shee would goe a begging , and eat not any thing , but what should be giuen her of almes , wherewith shee would sustaine this sinfull carkasse of hers . And to this end , would she go vp and downe her house amongst her seruants , first to one , and then to another , crauing and begging some thing of them . And because all did giue her almes , and none denie her , that did not fully please her , but did much trouble her ; wherefore , oftentimes , shee would steale vp into a priuate roome that shee had , and there shut her selfe in , where shee had some pictures of certaine great persons , that were fairely hung vp in frames , and euen of these ( to satisfie this her ill habit , and to keepe her selfe in vre ) would shee likewise demand an almes .

Sayavedra , maruelled much at it ; Who brought me from thence , to the outward Court belonging to the Palace ; in the midst whereof I might see a braue Prince , mounted vpon a beautifull horse of brasse , so curiously cut to the life , and so well proportioned in euery part , that they both seemed to haue life and motion . My apprehension , could not discerne , and therefore durst not presume to iudge , which of the two were better , either this , or that at Rome ; yet inclined in the end with that short vnderstanding of mine , to giue the praise to that which was there present ; not for that it was present , but because it did deserue it . I askt of Sayavedra , whose statua that was ? He told me , it was the great Dukes , Cosimo de Medici . Of whom I went discoursing vnto you vpon the The Statua of Cosimo 1. great Duke of Tuscanie . way . And here , great Ferdinando , his sonne , ( who lately was , but is not now aliue ) caused it to be set vp to perpetuall memorie . I would needs know out of curiositie , of what height it might be , and not being able to reach thereunto to take the measure of it , I was informed , that from the very bottome to the top , was about some fiftie handfuls high , little more , or lesse . Round about the said place , were many other delicate peeces cast in brasse , and some , of substantiall , yet very fine marble , so artificially wrought , that they did driue the beholders into great admiration ; leauing euen the best iudgements in suspense , and staggering those wits most , that were most acute ; excepting only such , as had some inckling afore-hand , what manner of things they were .

Afterwards , we visited the Temple of S. Iohn Baptist , as being most worthy S. Iohn Baptists Church in Florence . our particular remembrance ; for I may truly say of it , that there is scarse the like in the world for all in all . Which glorious fabricke , I then learned , was founded in the time of Octauianus Augustus the Emperor , and consecrated to Mars . There did I entertaine my selfe in obseruing its antiquitie , and foundation , wherein I tooke much content ; and the more , for that it is reported of it , and receiued by tradition , as also grounded vpon reason , ( in regard of its foundation ) That it is to last and continue , to the finall consummation and end of the world . Which we may the rather be induced to beleeue , for that neither length of time , nor those continuall warres , accompanied with so many calamities , haue as yet had the power either to deface , or destroy it . All the Citie besides being left desolate and laid leuell with the ground , only this Temple remaining still vntoucht . The bodie of it , consists of eight angles , all spatious , strong , and maruellous beautifull to behold ; especially those its three great doores , which are shut vp with six halfe doores , all of brasse , cast in curious molds , and all of one entire peece , wrought with Histories of embossed worke , so daintily handled , so finely raised , and so proportionably equall in euery point , as may well be presumed from the Artizans of that Citie , who beare away the bell from all the rest , in that kinde , that are in the world .

This Temple hath likewise another greatnesse belonging vnto it , which is this ; That there being in Florence one and forty Parish Churches , two and The Churches , and c●…nts in Florence . twenty Monasteries of Fryars , forty and seuen Nunneries , foure Colledges or Houses for those that are willing to retire themselues from the world , eight and twenty Hospitals , and two bearing the name of IESVS ; yet there is no baptisme vsed in any of these , saue only in that of S. Iohn , and in that Church , are all the children of this Citie baptized , from the meanest amongst the commons , to the principall Gentlemen , and the great Dukes owne children . For that time , that we stayed there , we visited all the Churches-one after another , which were of that admirable workmanship , and set forth with such singular and rare curiosities , that it is not possible to relate no not the least part thereof , in regard of the muchnesse of them , ( the number of them being so infinite , ) nor is the vnderstanding capable of apprehending them , much lesse our outward eye . For he that should goe about to make a memoriall of so great a Machina , and such a masse of things , whose admirable parts are so numberlesse , and euery one of them accompanied with sundry peeces of such singular Art , and exquisite workemanship , besides so many excellent pictures , some in tables , and some ingrauen in brasse , and other mettals , had need to make thereof a huge great Volume , and to seeke out some other Chronicler , that shall be better able then my selfe , to present these things to the eyes of the Reader , and to giue them their due commendation .

The great Duke , hath a Palace in the Citie , which is called Il Palaggio de Piti ; whose excellencies , greatnesses , and curiosities , as well in gardens , as The Dukes Palace . fountaines , mounts , groues , sports for hunting , and goodly roomes , may ( without indearing ) be truly said to be a princely and royall seat ; and such a one , as may compare with any other whatsoeuer in all Europe .

I would not omit to know and see the circuit of this Citie , which containeth The circuit of Florence . in it such store of wealth . And I found it to be much about fiue mile compasse : it hath ten great Gates , and one and fifty Towers . The Citie is seated all within the walls , and hath no suburbs adioyning thereunto . Through the midst of it passeth the famous riuer of Arnus , vpon which stand foure most stately bridges , all pau'd with stone , and very strongly built , being large and spatious withall . And all these things , being thus done in perfection ; the like perfection is also to be found in their gouernment , their behauiour , and in the generall fashion , and cariage of that people . And therefore iustly , and with a great deale ●…son , is this Citie called Florencia , as being flos florum , the flower of flowers , and as it were the only nose-gay of all Italie . Wherein all things , as in a curious garden , doe flourish ioyntly together , but more particularly these especiall and singular good things ; As the liberall Arts , horsemanship , all kinde of learning , militarie discipline , true dealing , faire proceeding , sweet behauiour , plainenesse and sinceritie in their actions , and aboue all I must recommend vnto thee , their loue and kindnesse towards strangers . Shee like a true mother , imbraces them in her bosome , huggs them , makes much of them , and Florence a friend to strangers . fauours them more , then shee doth her owne children ; to whom , in respect of them , shee may be termed a mother in law .

The time , that I stayed there , I came to know the Causes by their Effects : to wit , by knowing the nature and condition of the inhabitants , and the politicke lawes , by which they were gouerned , and their due obseruation of them , not erring a tittle from them . There they apply themselues truly to know and The good gouernment in Flor●…e . esteeme euery mans merits , rewarding them with iust and due honours ; to the end that all may be incouraged to vertue . And let not Princes thinke it a small glory vnto them , for they ought to acknowledge it for one of the greatest , that can be giuen them , when it is truly said of them , that their noble and renowned actions , doe iumpe and concurre with those of their subiects .

I likewise knew that to be true , which Sayavedra had told me about the factions in Court , and the crossing and thwarting one another . I saw somewhat of that , which did exceed in other places , as Enuie , and Flatterie , whereof no Enuie , and Flatterie , two great Courtiers . Princes Court is free , which alwayes raigne there most , where is desire of s●…our , but more especially , when they labour to increase it , and to keepe themselues in grace with their Soueraigne . Which oftentimes turne to the great hurt of both the one and the other . They are fine and witty relators of other mens actions , and subtle Mathematicians , for to delineate and measure out that which other men can doe , and sometime that , which others cannot . But let these things rest , without farther entring into them . For hauing painted forth vnto you , in so great a perfection , this illustrious and noble Citie , it is not fit that I should blemish it with so foule a blot , and dash as it were with a cole , that faire commendation , that I haue giuen it .

CHAP. II.

Guzman de Alfarache goes to Bologna in pursuit of Alexandro , who had stolne his trunkes from him ; Whither , when he was come , going about to imprison Alexandro , himselfe was clapt vp .

IN Florence , I did eat out that horse , which my Lord Embassador Guzman sells his horse , and breaks his fast with his old shooes . had bestowed on me at my departure , and made me one mor●…g a breakfast of his shooes . I say ; To the end I might ●…ell him the better , I caused him to be new shod , giuing order to Sayavedra to make money of the old ones ; whereof we made our breakfast . If this heretike , Necessitie , had not kickt me out of Towne , and thrust me out by head and shoulders , I should neuer while I liu'd , of mine owne accord , Guzman loth to leaue Florence . haue gone from thence . And this thou maist as certainly beleeue of me , as of any one Article of thy Creed . For I had now well taken salt , and was throughly seasoned , and had sounded that Citie to the very bottome , yet I know not , how my minde might haue altered , and what I should haue done hereafter . For in conclusion , todo lo nueuo , aplaze : See what is newest , that we still like best . This rule , holding more especially in such as I was , who had Prouerbe . spiritum ambulatorium , a wandring humour of mine owne , and was a great louer of nouelties . But then I was of that opinion , for those many reasons I had on my side . For it was my hap to come thither , when they were full of their sports and pastimes ; and other young fellowes of the same yeeres with my selfe , led me to these their delightfull pleasures along with them from house to The sports and pastimes that are vsed in Florence . house , from feast to feast , and from bridall to bridall .

In one house you might finde them dancing ; in another , playing vpon instruments ; in a third , singing ; and in a fourth , making merry with their friends . All was delight , and more and more delight still ; one sets vp his rest at Primera , another vyes his game at Tic-Tack : some at one game , some at another . In a word , in all places of the Citie wheresoeuer we came , we met with nothing , but laudable exercises , and honest recreations . There might a man see many young gallants , pompous in apparell , and richly clad , and many faire Ladies , and hansome Gentlewomen , who wanted no setting forth for curious and costly dressings , with whom these young blouds did dance . Whose tyres on their heads were so daintily adorned , their gownes on their backs so richly imbroydered , and their Chapine●…●…o ●…o their feet , so plated with siluer , and beset Prouerbe . with pretious stones , that they did rauish both the eyes , and the soules of as many as did looke vpon them . I leaue it therefore to thee to consider , what kinde of dressings those were , that had so much power to moue the beholders . See how I haue seasoned this dish , that I may not disgrace the goodnesse of the meat . Tell me ; hath it not a good rellish ? is it not pleasing to thy palate ? Though I goe not into a Tauerne to drinke , f f Sino beuo en la taberna , huelgome en ella . Deue ser entretenimiento ver en la tabe●…na vnas mona tristes , y ocras alegres , ver cantar vnos , y llorar ocros ; y todos con muy poca firmeza en los pies , y gran modorra en la cabeça . Covarr . verb. Taberna . yet I take delight to talke of it , and to looke vpon it , and to peepe in at the doore as I passe by , and sometimes slip in , to make my selfe merry . No man is wise on horsebacke ; much lesse , in the vnbridled yeeres of his youth . In a word , I was young . And as old age is cold , and dry , so on the contrary , youth , is hot , and moyst . Youth , hath strength , and old age , wisdome . Thus are these gifts diuided , and yet euery one hath that which is fit , and necessarie for him . And though for the most part , we see that all old men turne to be young , if not ( as we say ) become children againe ; yet it were a wonder , to see young men grow old . And I say againe , it were as great a wonder , to see a young man in yeares , to be an old man in discretion , as to see a Peare tree , to beare fruits in the heart of winter . But I speake this in Spanish , that some of other Countries , whom I know , may not finde fault with The Authors protestation , me . And I would haue all men take notice , that I alwayes speake according to the vse and fashion of mine owne Country : for I doe not know after what manner others dance in theirs .

But that I may returne to my former discourse ; it grieued me very much to leaue Florence , ( yet did it much concerne me to be gone ) flying as it were from my selfe , not knowing to what end , nor whither to goe ; nor yet knew I , why I should stay any longer there , vnlesse it were to spend that poore little store of money , that I had yet left me , and that chaine , which the Lord Embassador my master , gaue me at my farewell as a token of his loue , and to thinke vpon him , as oft as I chanc'd to cast mine eyes vpon 〈◊〉 And I must truly confesse vnto you , that he was neuer out of my minde , ●…ensoeuer I did thinke vpon that Guzman begins to consider with himselfe . houre , wherein I must ere long be forced to●…rne it into money . And as it was giuen me with a great deale of loue , so did it exceedingly grieue me that I must shortly part so vnkindly with it . I would , if I could , haue kept it rather then my life , and neuer haue parted from it ; but there are some such occasions , wherein parents may impawne their owne children . Patience , ( quoth I to my selfe ) I will doe the best I can ; and more , I can not . And therefore ( my masters ) I pray pardon me ; for he , that hath no other meanes to helpe him-selfe , and is constrained thereunto out of meere necessitie , is driuen many times to commit many a greater error , and that shall proue farre more preiudiciall and hartfull . I had a great wrestling and strugling with my selfe ; and my thoughts had a cruell sharpe warre with themselues , as well touching this , as other the like businesses . I considered with my selfe , what would now become of me , and what course I were best to take , for to supply and releeue my wants . God helpe me ; How heauy is the heart , when the g g Apretado se halla vn coraçon , quando nolo està la bolsa . Money cheeres ●…ns heart . purse is light ! And therefore we say ; Prouerbe . A heauy purse , makes a light heart . What little comfort doe we take in the world ? And how faint and feeble , are the pleasures of this life to him , whose purse strings are too weake ? And more particularly , to one that is in a strange Country , and that hath put on a resolution with him-selfe to forget his lewd courses , and not to liue , as he had done , by tricks and by shifts ; yet not knowing how to gaine a penny , and wanting the meanes , how to come by money ; hauing no neere acquaintance with any , to presume of such kindnesse from them , being farre from my friends , and farther from any the least intention or purpose to cheat or cozen any man . For , if I would haue runne that course , and set my minde vnto it , I needed not to haue taken such a deale of care and trouble in the businesse . For I had my 〈◊〉 about me ; and a hand , that was able to finde me worke all the yeare long ; I could not want , ( if I listed my selfe ) to picke out a liuing where-soeuer I should come . For ( thanks be to God for it ) what I had once learned , it was mine owne for euer : I neuer lost it , if I once had it . Only , I might at first be a little to seeke , for want of vse , but the tooles of my trade were neuer out of my hand , but alwayes carried them with me , whither-soeuer I went . I departed from Rome with a full purpose to become an honest man ; and fall backe , fall edge , come good , or come bad , all welcome , as it pleas'd God ; for I had a great minde to continue these my good desires , and t●…remaine firme in this so honest a resolution . But seeing , that Hell is full of these , what good could my holy deliberations doe me , if I did not put them in execution ? For f●… without workes , is but a dead faith .

Now , I had gotten me a man to waite vpon me ; Where by the way , I pray He that is vsed to command , will hardly be brought to obey . let me aske you , what a good direction this was , to addresse me to a Master ? What a Letter of recommendation to bee receiued into seruice ? I had beene now accustomed to command ; how would you then , that I should submit my selfe to obey ? I verily thought with my selfe ( as perhaps many moe doe , for I doe not thinke that I am the onely man of that minde in the world ) that I Want , and honesty , can hardly stand together . should haue beene an honest man , if answerable to that glorious show that I made , and the height whereat I liu'd , I had had wherewithall to spend accordingly , and that I had not wanted meanes to vphold this great spirit of mine , but had had money enough to maintaine and inlarge my generous disposition . But the summes ( I feare me ) which must haue seru'd to supply my wants , must miraculously by some holy Saint or other , be subministred vnto mee : for no other hand could doe it . And certainly , I know not how it then fell out , that I was so honest , as I was ; I verily beleeue , that this also was a Miracle , considering the condition of that present time , and mine owne euill inclination . I was A good discourse of Guzmans . young , left to liue at mine own liberty , suffered to do what I list , and rather accustomed to seeke occasions , to doe then to shunne ill ; and I could hardly by the helpe of my good desires , eith●…●…ose , or lay aside my bad conditions .

Such a Lady , or such a Gentlewoman saith ( which is their ordinary kind of language ) I would faine be a good woman , I desire to lead an honest life , as no woman more , if that necessity did not force me to doe that , which I doe . Indeed Madame , by your leaue , your Ladyship lyes . For , that you doe ill , it is onely , because you are willing to doe ill . O what a poore excuse is this ? I confesse that I offend thus and thus , but it is against my will ; for I am not of my selfe giuen to such , or such a sinne , nor haue any inclination thereunto in the world . In good faith it is otherwise , for I reade it in your eyes . And they consenting vnto sinne , who can be said to be the cause thereof , but your selues ? For if you would but turne your eyes from your windowes , and throw them on your distaffe , or your cushionet , certainly necessity would not constraine you to ill . Womens hands are not of that length , nor so quicke and so nimble , that they should sodainly reach so farre , as to finde you food , apparell , and house-rent : yet are they long enough , to put themselues forth to seruice ; and they that set you a worke , will bestow house-roome on you , and put meate in your mouthes , and money in your purse . But I expect you should say vnto me ; Thou , that art a man , giu'st me this counsaile ; Thou art loath to serue thy selfe , and yet thou wouldst haue me to serue , that am a woman ? Indeed , thou hast hit the nayle on the head ; And this is that , which I say ; That your Mistrisse-ship , and I , and this , or that other woman ( bee shee what shee will ) are all of vs vnwilling to doe our selues good . We will put to no helping hand of our owne , but would , that what we stand in need of , should be put into our mouthes , and that it should miraculously be ministred vnto vs .

Twenty yeares of age , is a terrible beast : O how headstrong , and how wild Youth , what a kind of thing it is . it is . There is no battaile so bloody , no skirmish so hot , and so hard to come off cleare , as that warre , which wee wage with our youth . For if it goe about to make its retreat from Vice , it hath many fierce enemies that sharply set vpon it , neuer ceasing to assaile it , galling it here , & wounding it there , which wil hardly bee repell'd , more hardly ouercome , by reason of those many occasions of aduantage which offer them-selues ; it being besides a thing proper vnto youth , to stumble , if not to fall , at euery step : Youth hath not ( beleeue me ) any strength in its legs , much lesse know they well how to goe . It is an vntamed beaste , it is full of fury , and voyd of patience ; and if it entertaine any good motion , a hundred ill thoughts disband the same by and by , and put it to route ; not giuing it so much leysure as to set foote to ground , nor to put it in the ●…rop , not to seate him-selfe sure in the Saddle . Euery one cannot get vp to it ; and few that can bridle this beaste . It will not be so soone ouer-mastered , as some doe thinke , nor be easily brought to goe that way as a man would haue it . I was euer , like the Hog , vp to the very eyes , nousling my selfe in the mud of vice and wickednesse , ( for albeit I did not alwayes practise ill , yet I neuer lost the sight of it ) and I was loath to kick and fling against it , lest by my too much stirring , I might loosen my lading , and cause it to fall to the ground ; if not spraine , and hurt my selfe .

A Bullocke , or young Steere , when he is to bee tamed , they first halter his legges , throwing him downe on the ground , then they fall a shooing of him , after that , they binde a rope or a cord to one of his hornes , which they suffer him to traile after him for some fewe daies ; and when they are minded to bring his necke to the yoake , they yoake him with an old Oxe , that hath beene long vsed to the plough , and so by little and little disposing him thereunto , they Instruction , necessary for youth . teach him by these degrees to beginne to draw handsomely , and in the end to be as perfect as the best of them .

That young man therefore , that hath a desire to be old , let him leaue to follow my steps , and let him striue to subdue his passions ; let him prepare , and dispose himselfe to labour , and in dispight of his owne will , let him strongly struggle and wrastle with his idle and foolish desires , and throw them flat on their backes to the ground , that they may neuer rise vp any more to make resistance against him : And when he hath thus gotten them downe vnder him , let him binde them fast with that double twisted cord of Patience , and Humility ; and let him traile after him , for some certaine daies , these his strange and dangerous appetites , spending his time in vertuous exercises , and many shall not passe ouer his head , before hee be brought to bow his necke to that holy yoake of repentance ; and by yoaking him-selfe with good company , hee shall quickly be inured to the plough , wherewith he shall breake vp the earth of his euill inclinations ; But let no man thinke , that hee shall bee able to doe this at the first dash ; and that once trying what he can doe , shall be sufficient to make him grow perfect . Some ( I know ) will not sticke to tell me ; I would doe this , and I would doe that , my will is to it , but &c. Let him speake this to such another This same but , or Si non , is the cause of much harme . as himselfe , and to one that is of the like quality and condition , as he is . For I know well enough already , that he is not willing to doe this , nor to doe that ; For they , that are willing indeed , vse other more effectuall meanes . And nothing is hard to them , that will set them-selues hard to it . Peraduenture such a one thinkes , or expects , that God should open the heauens , and miraculously strike him to the ground , as he did Saint Paul ; But let him not looke to haue the like course to be taken with him ; lest he be accounted a foole for his labour .

God threw him to the ground , and humbled him sufficiently , when he afflicted him with sicknes , when he laid troubles vpon him , and when he suffered him to be toucht in his good name ; if either then , or now , thou wouldst accept of grace , while it is offered thee , thou shalt be sure to finde it . But thou wast neuer willing to entertaine these good motions , much lesse to humble thy selfe with Saint Paul , and to city out with him ; Domine , quid vis , vt faciam ? Lord , what wilt thou , that I doe ? What is thy diuine will and pleasure ? Thou wilt not like Paul be for God , and yet thou look'st that God should be for thee . And if he dealt thus with Saint Paul , it was because God knew the earnest desire that he had to know and search out the Truth : and that it was his zeale to the Law that did thus ouersway him ; the current whereof being turn'd another way , he would be as feruent for the Gospell . And you can instance but in a few that haue beene saued by a bare intention , without any good worke . These ●…o are to concurre in one , intention and action ; I say , if we haue any time left If we will be saued , our good intentions , must be seconded by good actions . vnto vs for action , or wherein we may doe any good worke . And then shall a ●…me intention of amendment of life , and a hearty sorrow for our sins past , be accounted a good worke , when the night of death shall sodainly ouertake vs , and shut vs vp in darknesse . But hauing day enough to worke and labour in the Lords Uineyard , both these ought to goe together , I meane intention and action . For neither the spade alone , nor the hand alone , can digge , and dresse the ground ; but hand , and spade , must both worke together .

But who hath put me into this theame ? Was not I in Florence euen now to my great content ? Thither doe I returne againe . I assure thee , that the more I walked vp and downe that Citie , the more desirous I was to plant there my Pillars , and not to seeke for a Plus vltrà . For it was euen as I would haue wisht it to be , all very beautifull and delightsome . And if therein resided either flattery Enuy , and flattery , hurtfull to a Commonwealth . or enuie , I tooke no great heed thereof , but let it runne to others account , for I was none of those , that were comprehended in that Decree . I had nothing to doe ( like Iudas ) with the almes of the poore ; nor could any preiudice thereby come vnto me , being that I pretended nothing in Court . And if they would any way haue holpen me , I had no need to vse them . Or had I stood in need of them , I would not haue made any vse of them ; they euermore seeming vnto me the greatest meanes of mischiefe , that euer came yet within my knowledge . For one onely flatterer is sufficient alone of him-selfe to ouerthrow a Commonwealth , if not a whole Kingdome . Happy is that King , and fortunate that Prince , whose Subiects serue him for loue , and who out of his wisedome leaues now and then an eare open to the peoples complaints , as also their aduice ; for onely by this meanes shall he come to know truthes , whereby hee may redresse those things , that are amisse , and keepe off flatterers from abusing his eares .

There would I haue liu'd all the daies of my life , and haue past away the time , like a Duke , had I had wherewithall . But I was in a manner blowne vp , and all my money was almost spent . I need not to confirme this vnto you with an oath , for you may very well ( if you will ) beleeue me on my bare word . The Riuer now began to grow drie , and my store to faile me ; for , Del monton que Prouerbe . sacau , y no ponen , presto lo descomponen . Pull from your heap , and put nothing to it ; you , or your heape ( if not both ) may rue it . So that my moneys still going out , and none comming in , if I should haue staid any longer there , I should quickly haue runne my-selfe out at the heeles , and it would haue beene a great disreputation for me , to haue come in a horsebacke , and to goe out a foote . I thought it good counsell to vphold mine honor , and to depart from thence , both to my credit , and content , before that being forced thereunto by necessity , I should come to discouer my wants , and be bound to stay still there , for lacke of meanes to be gone . I acquainted Sayavedra with this my purpose , and plainly opened my minde vnto him ; For by this time , I knew well enough , that he was likely to be my onely helpe at a pinch , my strong forte , and the onely trench whereunto I might with safety retire , and that I could not haue met with such another companion in all the world for my purpose . I went preparing him by a little and a little , working and disposing him by degrees , that he might not afterwards thinke that he had seene strange visions , and vaine apparitions , and that whatsoeuer should hereafter befall me , might not seeme new vnto him , or accounted as a nouelty .

When I had thus moulded him , he said vnto me ; Sir , There is one remedy , Sayavedras counsell to Guzman for the recouery of his stol●…e goods . that offers it selfe vnto me now on the sodaine , neither chargeable , nor hard , but very easie to be effected , and that may make much for your profit . Seeing there is no remedy , but wee must be gone , it is not much materiall which gate we goe out at ; for at any one of the ten , we may trauaile out on our ten toes , to goe abroad , and see the world . Let vs ( if you will be rul'd by me ) take the way , that leads to Bologna ; for besides , that it is neere at hand , and that we shall there see that famous Vniuersity , wee may chance likewise to haue the good lucke to meere with Alexandro Bentivoglio , that Master of mine , who went away with the most part of your goods . For if we hap to find him there , ( as I verily beleeue we shall , ) It will be an easie matter for you to recouer your owne . For , vpon that information which was made of the theft in Siena , it is not to be doubted , that though you get not what you lost againe , yet he or his father will at least be content to giue you good satisfaction .

I tooke this to be no bad counsell , but was very well pleased therewith , not thinking on any other thing then the force of Law , and the iustnesse of my cause ; and let iustice deale neuer so indirectly with me , I could not conceiue the least cause of doubt , in regard of the cleare notice I could make of the theft , which would , if not all , yet haue allotted me the greater part of my goods : perswading my selfe , that this party , who was principall in this theft , knowing him-selfe guilty therof , would haue come vnto me vpon his knees , desiring my pardon , and that he would voluntarily haue offered to make me amends for the wrong he had done me , and to come vpon any termes to agreement with me ; as well for that his parents , and kindred in that Citie , were persons of principall note ; as also , for that notwithstanding all the meanes they were able to make to bolster out the matter , yet would they neuer permit , that so foule a fact should come to publike hearing , and be iudicially tryde , nor that they , and their house , should be blotted and blurr'd with so foule a staine , and dishonour , as this could not chuse but proue , if it should once come to be ripped vp .

Will you heare a strange kinde of humour in me ? you shall then know it by this . It is not long since you heard me say , what a delicate and delightsome place Florence was , and what a deale of pleasure I tooke therein . And now vpon the sudden , I was growne out of loue with it , the very name of it was growne so hatefull vnto me , that it was ready out of a loathing that I had taken to it , to turne vp my stomach . It began now ( me thought ) to stinke , I could not endure the sent of it ; euery thing seemed so foule and so filthy to my sight , that I did now long to be gone , and till then , euery day was to me a thousand . You may see ( my masters ) what wonders want of money can worke ! You will in a moment hate those things , which you lou'd most , when you lacke wherewithall to maintaine both your selues , and them . Now my minde gaue me , that Guzman minds to leaue Florence , and to goe to Bologna . there was not such another Citie in the world , as Bologna ; wherein I should no sooner set my foot , but I should recouer my stolne wares , and haue wherewithall to spend , and to keepe company with your young Students , lads of the right stampe , merry greekes , much of mine owne size and marke , with whom I might play three or foure venewes , when I were so disposed , without any great disaduantage of weapon . And the dice might haply haue giuen me so lucky a chance , and haue hit so right , that I might haue had the good fortune to haue followed my studies : for that learning , which my Lord Cardinall bestowed vpon me , I had not as yet forgot it , but was very ready and perfect in all that had beene taught me . And questionlesse , with that little learning , that I then had , I might very well haue proceeded Master , and made a shift to liue by that profession , if that kinde of course had beene fitting for me , or that my selfe had beene willing to apply my minde hereunto .

But stay a while Guzman , be not thou too hastie : Wilt thou offer to traile a gowne after thee , being so weake that thou canst scarce hale a halter at thy heeles ? Hold thy hand , this is not a taske for thee to vndertake . There is no talking of commencing Doctor , till the bowe of preferment be drawne home by the strong arme of angels . What canst thou hope for then , who art so poore , that thou art scarce able to wagg the string .

I was now fully resolued to begin my iourney , and to make all the haste I could . And so in an instant I put this my intention in execution . Away goes Sayavedra , and I together , making directly for Bologna . And because I had flying thoughts in my head , I was willing to put wings to my horse : making such good speed , that we came thither that night ; but slept very little , for we spent the most part of it in plotting and casting about how we should beare our selues Guzman , and Sayavedra being come to Bologna , are puzled , not well knowing what course to take . in this businesse ; and whilest we were discoursing to and fro , what were best to be done ; Sayavedra ( hauing looked well as it should seeme on his owne cards ) sayes vnto me : Sir , I hold it not so fit , that I should be seene herein at all , especially now at this my first flight , but rather to lye close awhile , till we may see , where it will be best to giue the wound ; and when wee shall come to know , where the game lies , and that there is any hope of doing good , then let vs let flie , and strike it dead . For if Alexandro be in the towne , and should know that I am here , ( which he cannot choose , if I stir abroad , being so well knowne as I am , ) he will question me , wherefore I am come hither , and with whom ? And that knowne , he will absent him-selfe forthwith from the Citie , and so we shall be defeated of our purpose . Or if he chance but to suspect , that I had a finger in this businesse , and that I was the cause of this iourney , and his shame , there is no way but one with me , he will surely kill me ; so that neither of these two will aduantage vs any thing , nor is fitting for vs to be aduentured on . Besides , if this web must come to be wouen in the Loome of Iustice , I must bee the master-thred to be wrought vpon , there is no auoyding of it : And therefore you haue no reason to suffer me ( considering that I can stand you in no stead , if I be taken and clapt by the heeles ) to receiue any farther harme , then what I haue already endured . The best course then to be taken , I conceiue to be this ; That to morrow morning you make inquirie after him , and by one meanes or other ( with the best secresie you can ) seeke first to know him , and to take particular notice of his person ; That done , wee will consult thereof afresh , and gouerne our selues therein , according as occasion and time shall serue .

I did not like amisse of this , me thought it was good wholesome counsell . Well ; as he had aduised me I set my selfe to worke , I walkt vp and downe the Towne , and after the treading of some few steps , not being troubled ( as fortune would haue it ) to tyre out my legs in the search of him , it was my good hap to haue him pointed out vnto me with the finger , telling me ; f f Guzman finds Alexandro with his cloathes on his backe , that he had stolne from him . Loe , that 's the man . Which direction I needed not , for the cloathes on his backe did speake what he was , and without others teaching , could tell me , This is Alexandro . He was standing amongst other young men at the Church doore ; nor doe I beleeue , that his deuotion was such , as to goe in and out to heare Masse , but I was rather of opinion , that hee stood there registring those that went in , offering great scandall , but showing small respect , to that sacred place . g g An ill custome , that is too much vsed in many great Cities in the world . Especially in Madrid , where to preuent this Church-courting , the men are to goe in and out at one doore , and the women at another . It is a foule shame , that this is so commonly vsed as it is in most parts of the Christian world . I know what I speake ; Would to God I knew as well how to reforme this abuse . Are there not store of streets , and other publike places in the towne , for to make loue in , which wee scandall too much already with our lewd steps , wanton lookes , dishonest signes , and tokens , and perhaps other things of a worse condition , to intimate our loose and lustfull affections , but that wee must wrong Prouerbe . Gods holy Temple with this our vnciuill and beastly behauiour .

But let vs proceed in our former argument , that wee may not leape from a Masse , into a Sermon . It seemed vnto me , that hee stood not there with any great deuotion , for he talkt h h The Spanish phrase is , Hablaua por la mano . That is , he talkt with his band . Now to talke with the band , is an ancient fashion of speaking , by forming letters , and by putting your fingers in diuers and sundry postures , whereby a man makes his mind knowne . Couar●… Verb : Mano . Guzman in a great rage ; and why ? apace with his hand , and now and then he would breake out in a loud laughter . He had at that time a doublet of mine on his backe of cloath of siluer , and a ierkin drest with Amber , and other rich perfumes , cut and slasht cleane through , and lined with the same cloath of siluer , sutable to the doublet , and richly laid with lace after the Seuillian fashion , and eight buttons of gold wrought vpon Amber , to make it sit the closer to the collar , all which a Gentleman of Naples presented mee withall , for a certaine dispatch that I had procured for him , by soliciting his businesse with my Lord Embassador .

When I came to know mine owne , and saw another man weare it before my face , I could haue found in my heart to haue stab'd him , and to haue presently stript him of it , so did it grieue and vexe the very soule of me , that such deare pledges as these of my friends loue vnto me , should thus fore against my will , be in another mans possession . My blood rose against him , and I was often tempted to haue gone and stab'd him , but I held my hand , and said with my selfe ; No Guzman , no ; This must not be so ; Better it were , that this thy thiefe , should be conuerted , and liue . For if thou let him liue , he may chance to pay thee ; but if thou kill him , thou art sure to pay for him . And of the two , it is better to take , then to giue . And safer it is for thee , that others should be indebted to thee , then thou indebted to others . And it will bee more for Prouerbe . thy ease , and more easily compast , to get in a i i Mas facil cobrar , que pagar . debt , then to pay a debt . Make not thy selfe the defendant , if thou maist be the plaintiffe . Goe on faire and softly , be not so hasty , for there is no body that runs after vs . And if there be any order or Law in gaming , and if the dice runne true , if the cards bee not packt , but are well shuffled and cut , and that there be faire play , vnlesse the diuell be in it , or my lucke exceeding bad , all the world cannot winne the game from me . For I haue cards enough in mine owne hand to carry it . We are sure the bird cannot now get from vs ; which is that which importeth vs most . Let vs not feare the Chase , but hunt liuely , for the Buls are safe enough ; they cannot escape vs . He is taken in the manner , the theft found about him , hee cannot possibly deny it . I sweare I will put him to his necke-verse , and see how well or ill he will come off , and make him to confesse vpon the Racke , who put him into those fine cloathes , or in what Fayre or Market he bought them . Prouerbe .

Hauing consulted thus with my selfe , I got me home to my lodging , acquainting Sayavedra with what I had seene . Hee had prouided me my dinner ready for me , and had set it downe on the table , as soone as he saw I was come ; And when we had din'd , we pitcht the hay wherewith we were to catch this Cony . We discoursed one while of this course , another while of that , many designes we had , many meanes propounded to come by our owne ; but Sayavedra ( poore man ) did stagger at them , and was loath to giue way vnto them : He repented him now of the counsell hee had giuen me , fearing therein his own danger . But we concluded in the end , that of all other meanes , Peace ( if we could draw him to some reasonable composition ) were the best . For it is better to haue one bird in the hand , then two in the k k The Spanish prouerb is , Mas valia paxaro en mano , que Buey volando . Better a bird in hand , then a Vulture flying . Signifying thereby , That what a man hath safe and sure in his power , is much better then the vncertaine hopes of great matters , by reason of those many accidents that may interhappen . Couarr Verb : Bueytre . bush . And a bad l l De menor dan̄o mal conçierto que buen pleyto . The tyranny of great persons . Accord , is better then a good Plea : Lesse harme euer comming of agreeing , then suing . So that at last , we grew to this conclusion , that I , by a third person , should vse some meanes , to haue his father talkt withall , making him acquainted with the businesse , and the whole manner how it was carried , giuing him a large account of euery particular thing , remitting my selfe to his good will and pleasure , how he in his owne discretion should thinke meet I deseru'd to be dealt withall , and that he would not enforce mee ( considering my faire manner of proceeding with him ) to recouer mine owne by rigour of Law , being there Prouerbe . was Euidentia facti ; besides many other pregnant proofes to be produced , that these goods were mine . And so I did , as we had deuised ; hauing made choice of a discreet person , who should secretly and with fitting language , deliuer thus much vnto him . But because Power is commonly accompanied with Pride , and Pride is still attended with Tyranny , he was so farre from compounding the businesse , that he made little reckoning of it , taking it ill at his hands that treated with him about it , wishing him that hee should speake no more of it , deeming it as an affront done vnto his honour , and a meere defamation . He feigned him-selfe to be greatly wronged , though he knew well enough that I was he , that was iniur'd ; and without giuing vs either good hopes , or good words , he dispatcht my messenger .

When I receiu'd this answer , I hatched a thousand euill imaginations in my heart . But because I would not returne euill for euill , I resolued to talke with some one Lawyer or other of that Vniuersity , that should be recommended vnto me for the nimblenesse of his wit , and soundnesse of iudgement ; to whom I opening my case ( fearing the successe thereof , for that my aduersaries father was so powerfull ) might craue his opinion , and that hee would assist me with his best aduice and counsell , for the better prosecuting of his businesse . Hee plainly told me ; Sir , it is well enough knowne in this Towne , what manner of man Alexandro is , as also his lewd and idle courses , which in some other place , would be a sufficient information against him . Besides , there is so much truth in that , which you vrge against him , that it is manifestly apparant to as many as know him , or shall heare you . You haue right on your side , a iust and a good cause , and therefore I would aduise you to frame an information against him , and to desire iustice . All Bologna , hath taken notice already of this theft of his ; for , as soone as he came hither with it , it was presently knowne , that these clothes were none of his owne ; as well , because he caused them to be altred , and fitted to his owne bodie ; as also , for that he carried hence with him no lambes to sell , nor any other kinde of merchandize , whereby he should make so rich a returne . Besides , another companion of his , in whom he put much trust , stole a good part of these goods from him , that he might likewise gaine thereby a part of his Pardons , & Indulgences . You see now , what course you must be faine to take , what lyes in me to releeue you , you may be assured of the best furtherance and the best counsell that I can giue you , for the countenancing of this your cause .

Whereupon , I being very desirous , that a bill should be exhibited against him , he presently ( according to my information ) drew one out , which I forthwith presented to the Auditore del Torrone , who is there the Iudge in all Causes Criminall . But , be it as it may be , whether it were immediatly from the Iudge him-selfe , or from the Notarie , I know not which , nor from whence , nor how it came to passe , but sure I am , that this businesse of mine was instantly ouer all the Towne , and particular notice was giuen thereof vnto Alexandro's father . And for that he was a man of authoritie in that Towne , and carried a great hand there amongst them , he hyes him in all haste to the Iudge , and there accusing me for this my bold attempt , and inconsiderate rashnesse , ( as it pleased him to terme it ) he formed a complaint against me , that I had defamed , and dishonoured his house , and that therefore he was of purpose come vnto him to desire his lawfull fauour , and that he would be pleased to doe him iustice , to the end that I might be seuerely punished for this my presumption . I know not how , but the matter was so carried betweene them , that it had beene better for me , to haue held my peace . He was a powerfull man in that Citie , and the Iudge ( it seemed ) was very willing to pleasure him . I began now to feare , that occasions of quarrell would be pickt against me ; mole-hils made mountaines ; and this my losse , turne to my greater losse ; making my vndoing , an occasion of my farther vndoing . For Loue , Interest , and Hatred , are euer maine enemies to the Truth . And in many places , As a man is befriended , Truthes enemies . so his Cause is ended . But he that hath both money and friends , is sure to worke out his ends . Money is of no great thicknesse , yet it dulls the double What abales the ●…dge of Iustice ? edg'd sword of iustice , if it but once offer to touch it . Gold , is a heauy mettall ; and that makes the ballance of Iustice so light . I did spit as it were against heauen , the driuell whereof fell vpon my owne face ; I shot my arrowes vp into the ayre , and they returned backe againe vpon mine owne bosome ; the innocent paying for the m m Pagan los iustos , por peccadotes . nocent ; and the iust , for the vniust . Prouerbe .

Much n n Mucho dan̄a , el mucho dinero . money , does much harme ; But much more , the euill intention of an euill man . And therefore where an ill-minded man , and a great masse of money meet together and shake hands , there is much need of helpe from heauen , to free an innocent soule out of their cruell clawes . Good Lord deliuer vs from out their clutches , for they are more griping and tyrannous , then those of Tygers , or of Lyons . Their will is a law ; what-soeuer they desire , that they doe ; right ( when they lift ) shall be wrong ; and wrong , right : And no man must controll them for it ; nor dare to say , blacke is their eye ; lest he chance to lose both his owne , for prying too neere into the secrets of these earthly gods . O that there were men of that goodnesse and courage , that would not sticke to tell them , and plainly giue them to vnderstand ; that the money , they thus vnlawfully take , shall last with them but a while ; but the fire , wherewith they shall be tormented for it , shall continue for euer .

The Iudge did limit me a prefixed time for my proofes , but so short , that it was not possible for me to make my information according to that scantling . In this you may see the iniustice that he did me . Who did euer till now know a Iudge restraine the Plaintiffe of lawfull time to make his proofes , as he did me , especially when I did alleage for my selfe , that the information was to come from Siena , where the theft was committed , whence I was to procure it , for otherwise I could not haue it . But to alleage this , or not alleage it , all was one . I must be content , will I , nill I , to sit downe with this losse . There was no fence for it . And to this purpose , before I passe any farther , I will tell you what hapned in a little Village of Andaluzia .

There was a certaine sessing to be set in a ratable proportion , vpon the A short tale of an Alcalde . Towne-dwellers , and borderers there-about , for some publike peece of worke , that was to goe in hand ; and the Collectors that were appointed to gather the money , had put into their rolle ( to contribute thereunto ) a Gentleman of as ancient a house , as any in those parts ; who taking himselfe therein to be greatly wronged , made his complaint against the collectors . But for all that , they did not strike his name out of the rolle . Now , when the time was come for the levying of these moneyes , they went vnto this Gentleman to demand so much of him , as he was rated at in their note ; He refused to pay it . Whereupon they distrained on his goods , and paid themselues . The Gentleman being much offended with this their proceeding , goes forthwith to his Lawyer , asks his counsell , who ( in conclusion ) drawes me a petition for him , grounded vpon all both Law , and Reason , wherein he layes open his ancient Gentry , and the noblenesse of his House , and that in regard thereof he was priuiledged from all manner of sessings , and such other the like payments , and that therefore he did humbly petition the Court , that they would be pleased to giue present order , that what the Collectors had forcibly taken from him , might againe be restored , and be deliuered backe vnto him , as in all equitie it ought . When this petition was by them deliuered vnto the Alcalde , hauing read it , and heard what they could say for themselues , he called to the Register , and said vnto him ; Mark well , what I shal say vnto you , & see you set it down in the very same words , as I shall deliuer it vnto you . This Petitioner ( then said he ) as he is a Gentleman , I will by no meanes debarre him of his priuilege , God forbid I should denie him his iust request ; but as he is a poore man , his House growne now to decay , and himselfe ( as you see ) in want , I hold it very fit , that he pay as others doe .

That I had iustice on my side , no man doubted it ; it was so publike a thing , that all the world tooke notice of it . But I was poore and needy , and therefore it was fit I should pay for all , and there was no reason ( in that respect ) that they should doe mee iustice . I presently smelt a rat ; I saw this was a bad signe , and was shrewdly afraid , that all my labour would be lost . But I could not for all this perswade my selfe , nor could it sincke into my head , that I should be that man , or whom it is said by way of prouerbe ; Paçiente , y apaleado : That I must goe away with the wrong , and the blowes too . First be made cuckold , and afterwards Prouerbe . knockt for my prating . Well ; such was my hard fortune , that being Co●…nudo , y apalcado , 〈◊〉 prouerbially spoken o●… those , who b●…es t●…e wrong they haue receiued are themselues condem●…d 〈◊〉〈◊〉 . Covarr . ve●…b . Apaleado . not able to bring in my proofes in so short a time , it so fell out with me , that my Bill of Complaints , was throwne out of the Court , and held as a thing of no validitie or force in Law , and that of the aduerse part , tooke place against me ; declaring there in Court , that I by this my petition , had shamed an infamous L●…bell against his sonne , by meanes whereof his House , and h●… honour was much defamed ; adding and interferting , in maiorem cautelam , I know not what a world of words , and what strange and intricate termes . That I did sp●…te , indubitatè , &c. That I did it wittingly and willingly , impudently and malitiously , aggrauating the matter against me with all the odious termes they could deuise , that if I should set them downe one by one , they would take vp a whole sheet of paper . Alleaging farther against me , that forasmuch as his sonne , was a quiet , honest , and peaceable Gentleman , and of a good both report , and life , I did deserue I know not what exemplarie punishment , hanging , burning , and drowning , all was too little , that I knew not what to make of it , nor what a Gods name , they would doe with me . Which things , w●…n they were read vnto me , I said to my selfe ; These men may haue healthy bodies , but I am sure they haue sicke soules ; They may haue good purses , but I finde ( to my cost ) they haue bad consciences . I was carelesse , ( as one that was confident of a good cause ) I neuer shrunke aside , and as I was afterwards going about my businesse , that my sute might not fall , for want of following , I was taken vp in the midst of the street by an Arrest , and presently carried away to prison , without Guzman clapt in prison . any other information against me , saue only the putting vp of my petition , and acknowledging it to be mine .

There is no sword , that hath so keene and sharpe an edge , as Calumnie , and false Accusation : and then cuts deepest , when it is in the hand of a tyrannous Iudge ; whose force and power is such , that it is able to ouerthrow , and lay leuell with the ground , the best grounded Iustice that is , though it haue neuer so sure , neuer so strong a foundation . Which it doth then most , and most easily , when a poore mans cause comes in his way , who suspects ( poore harmelesse soule ) nothing lesse , then to receiue hurt from him , to whom he flyes for helpe . My businesse was plaine , no tricks , no giggs in it , I did only set downe the naked truth , but they made it I know not how , by their quillets and deuices , knotty and vneuen , though there was not a man , neither within , nor without the Towne , that did not know , all was true , that I had deliuered ; and all this did plainly appeare to the Iudge to be so , and that I had sufficient information .

All this is very good ; yet for all this ( goodman Guzman ) giue me leaue to tell you , that you are a goose-cap . Thou art poore , thou wantest fauour , and Little reckning made of the poore . friends ; and therefore art neither to be heard , nor beleeu'd . These are not Cases , that are to be brought before the Tribunals of men ; but when thou hast occasion to haue thy cause try de , goe get thee to God , petition him , where the truth shall appeare face to face , without any need of the fauour of thy friend , nor an Aduocate to plead thy cause , nor a Register to record it , nor a Iudge to wrest it . But here they made a sport of Iustice , and like Iuglers plaid leggerdemaine with me . They punisht me , as an vnmannerly man of my tongue , a lyar , and a lewd companion . I had spent my moneyes , lost my goods , put in prison , gyves clapt on my legs , treated with euill language , vpbraiding mee with many foule and vnciuill reproches , vnworthy my person , without suffering me to open my mouth in mine owne defence . And when I would haue answered their obiections , and giuen them satisfaction by writing , when they saw how the world went with me , my Proctor forsooke me , my Solicitor would not come at me , my Aduocate refused to plead for me , so that I only now remained in the power of the publike Notarie . The only comfort that I had , was the generall voice of my wrong , comforting me , that that terrible and fearefull day , would one day come , that the powerfull shall for all his power , be condemned to Hell , and that there , your potentes , potenter punientur , your mighty men shall be mightily punished ; for that they are accursed of God for peruerting of Iustice . And that which he shall leaue behinde him , shall not continue to the third heyre , though he tye his land neuer so fast , nor make neuer so strong a conueyance , that it shall not goe from the house : For he cannot ( though h●… would neuer so faine ) tye the inclinations of those that are to succeed him ; nor is there any preuention , that he can vse , of that force as the least haire of his head , to make any resistance against Gods diuine will and pleasure . And it is to be beleeued as an article of thy faith , that their lands and estates must be spent and consumed , for that they are the grindings of the face of the poore , vngodly gaine , the bloud of the innocent , gotten in rage , and maintained with lyes .

But thou wilt say vnto me ; Trust them with so much more , till that day come , and you shall see whether they will make any bones of either taking the one , or thinking on the other . Where-unto I answer , that how sleight a reckoning soeuer thou mak'st of it , and that it seemes so long a day to thee , that it will neuer come , I doe not know what these kinde of men may thinke of it ; but I know very well , that it will come , and that quickly , and sooner perhaps then thou art aware . And then it shall seeme so short vnto thee , that thou wilt say ; I am but newly come forth with my feet from out my bed , and the night is already come , and I must shut vp my eyes in darknesse .

But perhaps , thou wilt reply vnto me ; I pray how cam'st thou by so many good suits of clothes , so much money , and other things of value ? Thou didst not get them by the spade , nor the plough , thou didst not digge , nor delue for them . What didst thou make in that street , vpon that occasion and accident you wot of , when you seru'd your Master the French Embassador ? Is this ( quoth I ) the rod , you seeke to beat me withall ? Thou art caught in thine owne-trap ; thine owne words doe condemne thee . For thou would'st liken these goods of mine , to those that are gotten by lewd women , whereas thou doest not , but oughtest to vnderstand , that their gaine is lawfull , though the act be vnlawfull ; and thou art in conscience bound to recompence her , if thou hast had thy desire of her , and didst make vse of her for thine owne interest . Besides , the case is not alike . For it is publikely knowne to all the world ; that though a corrupt Iudge commit neuer so many mischiefes , neuer so vniustly put men to death , neuer so wrongfully rob a man of his goods , and vndoe him by his partiall and corrupt dealing , thou shalt haue little or no remedie against him , nor canst thou take that from him , which he hath stolne from others . For thou art not his competent Iudge , nor of that power as to adiudge against his will that to others , which he hath taken from them . For though it be true , that he is culpable therein towards others ; thou shalt be sure to be found culpable towards him . And howsoeuer he scape , thou shalt be sure to smart for it . Beleeue me , I tell thee what is true , nay , I tell thee truth it selfe ; truth vpon truth .

But what good does this doe me ? My name is Pero Garzia , I am a kinde of Tom-Tell-Troth . A free Aruntius , that must vtter my minde plainly , though perhaps I may chance to smart for it . If we should all striue to heare truth , and to make satisfaction for those wrongs we haue done , we should see the Hospitals to be quickly fill'd . And now in good sooth , I bethinke my selfe , that it is better to enter into Heauen with one eye , then into Hell with two . And that S. Bartholmew , had rather haue his skin pull'd ouer his eares , then to sleepe ( as they say ) in a whole skin , and to goe therewith to eternall torment . And that S. Lawrence made the better choise , when he chose rather to be burned here , then there . But ( alas ) we cannot be all S. Bartholmewes , nor S. Lawrences , so as we be saued , that is sufficient . For mine owne part , I should be glad of the like good fortune . For he shall performe no small peece of worke , that shall worke out his saluation . But to be saued , many things are required . And it shall be impossible for thee to be saued , by keeping those goods in thy hands which thou hast stolne , when as thou art able ( if thou wilt ) to make restitution . Whichthou art loth to do , or dost not at al , that thou maist leaue it to they heires , dis-inheriting those , that are the true owners thereof : And therefore doe not thou seeke to trouble either thy selfe , or vs , to excuse these thy robberies and vniust actions , by cunning shifts , to cozen thine owne soule , and by lessening and mincing of them , as though they were matters of nothing , and therefore need not much to trouble thy conscience ; for this that I deliuer vnto thee is the Catholike faith ; and those other thy tricks and deuices , the sleights and subtleties of Satan . Miserable , and most wretched is that man , who for the maintaining of his pride and pompe in the world , and that he may leaue either his children , or his nephewes great titles , and rich reuenues , hath heaped vp riches by indirect meanes , and hath filled his house vp to the top with ill-gotten gaine , contenting himselfe , so as he may leaue a name here behinde him vpon earth , to leaue his soule , to liue hereafter for euer in hell . These ( I assure you ) are no iesting matters , they are not to be made sport withall ; for ere long , thou ( to thine owne cost ) shalt finde that to be too true , which I now tell thee . I call thee thine owne selfe , to be a witnesse of that which I haue said ; I desire no other . And let me tell thee withall ; That thou thy selfe doest not know when thy dayes shall haue an end , or whether thou shalt haue so much time of life lent thee , as to reade out these good lessons , which I reade vnto thee , howsoeuer foolish they may seeme vnto thee . But in that other world , thou wilt be of another minde . Nor doe not thou flatter thy selfe , That thou hast built such a Chappell , and maintainest so many Chaplaines to pray for thy soule , but at mine , and other mens cost , stripping one of his coat , another of his cloake , where-vnto thou hadst no right in the world . For Masses ( though S. Gregorie himselfe should say them ) cannot benefit the damned , there is no redemption , when the sentence is once past .

O good God ! When shall I make an end of troubling thee with these , and the like discourses ? For I know thou doest not looke for these Sermons from me , nor any other kinde of wholsome doctrine , but expectest only such things , as may serue to entertaine the time , or to bring thee asleepe . I doe not know how to excuse this terrible temptation , that I haue to talke in this fashion , saue only by telling thee , that it is with me , as it is with drunkards , who no sooner get a penny , but they goe , and spend it at the Tauerne .

There is not any p p The Spanish word is , Ripio . Cerca de los canteros , son las piedras menudas que saltan de las pieças que van labrando . o otto genero de piedras menudas , para rehinchir las paredes . bezimo , meter vno mucho ripio , quanden la meteria que va tratando , ingiere algunas cosas friuolas , à semejança del que haze paredes , que poniendo en las dos hazes piedras grandes , todo lo en de medio hinche deste cascaxo y ripio . Covarr . verb. Ripio . shauings , of mettall , stone , or wood , that I can meet withall , good or bad , one amongst another , but that I seeke to make some vse of it , and studie to serue my selfe with it , only that I may the better serue thee . And if that which I haue said , seeme vnto thee to be well said , it is well that I haue said it : but if it seeme ill vnto thee , reade it not ouer any more , nor goe therein a iot farther . For it is all q q Todo es matas , y por rozar . id est , Todo es trabajoso , y difficultoso . Ib. verb. Rozar . mountaynous matter , rough and craggy , wherein perhaps , thou shalt meet with more paine , then profit , yet doe thou but write the like , and I shall patiently endure whatsoeuer thou shalt say . But I will conclude this Chapter with telling thee ; That when misfortune shall follow a man , no diligence , nor good counsell shall auaile him ; but shall , where hee thinks to gather wooll , goe away with his fleece shorne .

CHAP. III.

Guzman de Alfarache , discourseth on the iniustice , which some Iudges doe , blinded by gaine , or by passion .

I Came out of prison , as out of a prison . I need not to indeare it more vnto you . For , the least I can say of it , is ; That it is a true and liuely picture of Hell it selfe . I got forth , out of a desire that I had to enioy my former libertie ; and had I not ( thinke you ) great cause to desire it ? For he , whom they had so vniustly bereaued of it , had good cause to feare greater dangers to ensue . For if so iust and so faire a businesse , as this was , did fadge so ill with me at the first , and that my Aduersarie had the better of the day of me , when I thought my selfe surest of the victorie ; I might very well , and with a great deale of reason perswade my selfe , that in negotiating the rest , I should finde much difficultie . Perhaps these men thinke , that God sleepeth . But doe not withall consider , that euen those , who had no knowledge of him , both did , and doe feare him .

Aesope asking Chilo , what God did : How he spent his time : And in what he did busie and imploy himselfe : Told him ; In exalting the humble , and in God exalts the humble , and humbles the proud . bringing downe the proud . I am a sinfull man , a lewd liuer , and a naughty fellow ; and sithence they did inflict punishment vpon mee , sure I must be in some fault . For it is not to be supposed , that an honourable Iudge , one that professes knowledge , and holinesse of life , will be wonne either by fauour , by gifts , or by feare , to peruert the course of Iustice , or to lay so heauy a burthen on his tender conscience . Especially considering with them-selues ; That euery man shall be rewarded according to his workes . But let them goe as they are . For the Iudges of the earth must be iudged ; and therefore I will not iudge them , nor grinde them any more with this stone . I had now beene taught experience to my cost , and sufficiently beaten with mine owne rod , insomuch that hauing beene once scalded with hot water , I was now afraid of cold . That from that day forward , I would neither passe by the Tyrrone , which was the place of Iustice , nor by the prison , nor scarce come within foure streets where they were . Not so much for my imprisonment , but for the wrong I receiued therein , contrary to all Law , and reason . I did not see a hackney-man with a wand in his hand , nor a Carrier with a cudgell vnder his arme , but I presently thought vpon the a a Vare , quasi Virga . Vare , or rod of Iustice . Euer after I resolued with my selfe , rather to sit downe with losse , then to goe to tryall of Law ; at least to vse all the meanes that I could to the contrary , till I saw there was no other remedie , being compelled thereunto rather by force , then necessitie . The reason mouing me there-unto , is that counsell which I gaue another in the time of my imprisonment .

There was a certaine fellow brought to prison , for that he had bought a mandillion , which they said , was stolne , the owner whereof was my very good friend . Who told me , that albeit he knew , that the partie imprisoned , was a person not to be suspected to be consenting to any such base kinde of pilfrings , yet at least , he would make him , to bring forth him , that sold it him ; for when that mandillion was stolne , be lost many other things with it , and therefore , though he might haue his mandillion restored vnto him , he would not rest so contented , but would either lose it , or recouer the rest .

I told him ; Sir , you are my friend ; The Law is costly , and therefore let me aduise you not to enter into it ; you are fairely offered , and therefore ( if you be wise ) take your mandillion , lest you spend your cloake , to recouer your coat ; No ●…od comes of ●…ng to Law . you will get nothing in the end by the bargaine ; clo●…ke , and coat , and whatsoeuer else you pretend , will goe all away in fees , so that the Lawyer at last will haue all , and your selfe nothing . He would not be ruled , and being ( as all selfe-will'd men are ) strongly wedded to his owne opinion , he flarly told me he would goe to a tryall with him , and see what would come of it . For he assured himselfe , that he had a great deale of reason on his side , and that his Proctor , and his Aduocate had told him , that he needed not to doubt of his cause , and that it would surely passe on his side . In conclusion , he had spent some fifteene dayes in following the sute against him ; in all which time there was no fault to be found against the prisoner ; but prou'd himselfe in the end to be an honest man ; whereupon , he was presently freed out of prison ; my friend perceiuing at length , how he had play'd the foole , repented himselfe of the lost time and charges , which he had spent in the sute . So that he was forced to sell his cloake , & was yet neuer a whit neerer the recouerie of his mandillion ; & I doubt not , but the Lawyers stript him to the very shut , before they had done with him .

Let those therefore , that can excuse it , leaue off to goe to Law ; for your Law-sutes , are like vnto your Mats ; whereunto , they that make them , goe adding one by one , rush to rush , and neuer make an end , till they cut them off , The nature of Law-sutes . or cleane rid their hands of them .

Law-sutes , belong properly to great persons , and for great and important Law-sutes , for whom they are fittest . causes ; for they haue wherewithall to hold plea , and are able to maintaine it . To these , the doores are set wide open , they are vsherd in by the officers of the Court , all shew respect vnto them ●…d if they spend their money , they haue money to spend . But as for thee , and me , we must for the recouering of fiue Royals , spend fifteene , and lose a hundred more in the losse of our time , besides a thousand troubles , and as many enemies , which we shall get thereby . And worse will it goe with vs , if we shall chance to goe to Law with one , that is mightier then our selues ; for , that a poore man , should goe to Law with a rich man , is all one , as if hee should offer to wrestle and try his strength with a Lyon , or a Beare . It is true , some such there haue beene , that haue giuen them the foyle , and sometimes quite ouerthrowne them , but this hath seldome happened , and when it doth , it is held so strange a thing , that it is accounted as a wonder , or some rare miracle . Those iestes are vnsauory b b No sonbuenas burlas , l●… que salen à la cara . , that turne to a Prouerbe . mans hurt . It is no sporting with edge tooles . Doest thou not see , and know , that these kinde of men , will make the Sunne to shine at midnight ? And that they cast out deuils in the name of Belzebub ? But as for vs , poore soules , La lechona , nos pare gozqu●…s ; All things goe crosse with vs ; especially , in causes Prouerbe . criminall , where the street of Iustice , is of that great bredth and length , where the Iudge may easily winde himselfe , whither , or which way he will , goe on this , or that side of the street , or to keepe the midle way , as hee himselfe shall haue most minde to . He can either lengthen , or shorten his arme , and reach out his hand , either to helpe thee , or to hurt thee , according as it shall haue a feeling of the businesse .

And therefore , to him , that will not wilfully cast him-selfe away , but desires Good counsell , for those that goe to Law . to haue a faire end of his businesse , my aduice is ; That he guild the Iudges bookes , and present the publike Notary with a siluer pen ; So may he quietly lay him-selfe down to sleepe , and take no farther thought for the matter , nor stand in need of Doctor , or Proctor , to plead and solicite his cause . If that course were taken in many Cities of Italy , which is vsed in diuerse other Prouinces , yea also among the very Barbarians ; with whom , when any one is absolued or condemned , the Iudge sets downe in his sentence vnder his owne hand , the cause that moued him to giue such sentence , and vpon what grounds hee did it ; surely , there would a great deale lesse euill come of it ; for , if he could show good reason for that which he did , he need not be asham'd who sees it , and the party thereby , whom it concerneth , shall remaine well satisfied ; But in case he shall not haue proceeded therein according vnto Law , but hath dealt vniustly in sentencing the businesse , some other superiour Iudge shall bee appointed to rectifie that wrong , and to amend the others errour . And I knew a Iudge my A Iudge on an ill condition , and a worse conscience . selfe , to whom a Merchant paid a round summe to haue him passe a sentence on his side , thinking thereby so to affright the aduerse party , that despayring of any hope of good in his sute , he might draw him to what composition it pleased him : Which a particular friend of his vnderstanding , came vnto the Iudge , and told him ; I wonder , Sir , how you could sentence this cause in this manner , being so contrary , as it is , to all Law and reason . To whom , the Iudge answered , That it made no great matter . For he was but a sub-alternall Iudge , and that there were other Iudges , that were his superiours , who might ( if they would ) reuerse that sentence , nor should the o●…her lose any thing at all by that , which he had giuen against him .

Such kind of men as these , will not stand much vpon committing these and the like errours , nor examine themselues , whether they doe well or ill in it ; for with them it is not accounted a fault , though it may truly be call'd Error de praesenti , an error in the Indicatiue Mood , a most foule fault : for in so doing , he doth rather deceiue , then iudge . But in my poore opinion , he is a foole , that may , and will not shunne Law-sutes ; And in good Philosophy , Minus est dam●… , Wise is that man that auoides going to Law . Iniuries to be borne withall . vnum sufferre , quam multos ; It is lesse harme , to suffer at one then many mens hands . When thy aduersary does thee an iniurie , it is one alone , that does it ; and by him onely dost thou suffer . But if thou goe about to reuenge it , goe which or what way soeuer thou wilt to worke , thou leap'st ( as we say ) out of the c c Saltaste de la sarten al fuego . frying-pan into the fire ; and seeking to auoid one inconuenience , Prouerbe . thou runst headlong into another ; nay into many , one vpon the necke of another . Wilt thou see the truth of this ? I will show thee the wayes then , wherein Your Tauerneros in Spaine , are not of that credit as your Vintners with vs , being for the most part poore base rogues Into whose Tauernes , no man of fashion will come , as holding it to be a discredit so to doe . They haue but one poore lower roome , and dresse no meate . thou must walke .

First of all ; Thou maist chance to light vpon an Alguazil ( who is a common Catch-pole , or appreh ender of mens persons ) a fellow , that hath neither soule , nor shame , who but the other day , was a Tauernero , a seller of wine , as his father was before him , though happely now they keepe no shop . And if the father were a thiefe from the beginning , the sonne is now the greater of the two . Who either bought that Vare , which he beares , to finde him meate to put in his mouth ; or else hath hired it of another , as a man doth a mule ; He is such a kind of poore , yet vnsatiable creature , that he must either steale , or starue ; and doth therefore steale , that he may satisfie his hungry maw . And vnder pretence that he is the Kings officer , and carries the Kings white wand , or Vare in his hand , throating it out , wheresoeuer he comes , Alguazil soy , traygo la vara del Rey ; I am an Alguazil , and carry the Kings staffe : he neither feares the King , nor keeps his Lawes , but both against the King , against God , & against all law , will he offer thee a hundred excesses , a hundred indignities , both in deeds and in words , that he may moue thy patience so farre , as to make thee ready to run Alguazils are to be auoided . out into resistance of iustice ( which is the trap , he sets for thee ) and bring thy offence to be criminall ; and though thou didst not make any the least stirre , What kinde of fellowes they be . nor hadst any such meaning , yet will he enforce it against thee , and perswade others ( all that he can ) to beleeue it .

I knew an Alguazil in Granada , that had two teeth , that were false and counterfaite , and fastned by art to those other that he had in his head . And in a certaine A Tale of an Alguazil of Granada . broyle or quarrell that sodainly arose in the street , he comming in among them , he secretly puts his fingers into his mouth , and cunningly pulling them out , causing his gumes wherewithall to bleed ; did not shame to say , that comming in to make peace in the Kings name , they were there beaten out . And albert this businesse did not succeed so well with him , as he could haue wisht it , nor tooke its intended effect , for that the truth thereof came to be knowne ; yet did he not giue it ouer for want of following , but vsed all the diligences he could , to possesse the Iudges with this falshood . It will lie in his hands , if thou but speake a word , or wag but a finger , to proue that thou didst giue him either ill language , or blowes ; and then will hee presently deliuer thee ouer to his Corchetes e e Corchete , quasi curuac●…ete , which signifies a claspe , that fastens a garment , and shuts it close . And by allusio●… , those Ministers of Iustice , which hang about a man , and hale him to prison , are called Corchetes , because of their taking hold like hooke●… . They are the same with your Sergeants yeomen . , with command to carry thee to prison . Behold now , what an honorable calling this is , what a gentle craft , what honest men forsooth , are these your Corchetes , your Sergeants Yeomen , infamous Villains , Traytors , Thieues , Drunkards , shamelesse Rascals , nay impudency it selfe . Insomuch , that a witty Lackay said of himselfe , when they had angred him ; He that saies the word Lackay , saies a vittailing house ; hee that sayes the word Lackay , sayes a Tauerne ; hee that sayes the word Lackay , sayes Cloaca●… immunditiae , all the vncleannesse that man can imagine . And that woman , that hath taken the paines to bring forth a sonne , that proues a Lackay , there is not that wickednesse in the world , which may not be presumed , to haue proceeded from her . So doe I likewise say ; that he , that saies the word Corchete , ( that is , Sergeant or Sergeants Yeoman ) there is not that vice , that villanie , that wickednesse , The wicked conditions of these kinde of men . which doth not vtter it selfe in that one word . For they haue neither soule nor conscience ; And are the onely true pictures , and most liuely images , of the Ministers of hell . So close doe they cling vnto thee , when thou fal'st into their clutches ; and if they doe not drag thee by the collar , haling and tugging thee as if they would pull out thy throat , ( which thou must acknowledge for a great & singular courtesie ) yet at the least shalt thou be so basely vsed by them , that the Eagle will carrie away the fearfull Hare with a great deale more clemency and mercy in her sharpe tallons , then these Hell-hounds will thee . They will punch thee , and kicke thee , and elbow-beate thy backe if thou goe not forward as they would haue thee , and will reuile thee with such base and bitter tearmes , as if thou wert as bad as they : And for no other cause in the world doe they vse men thus scuruily and vnciuilly , saue onely to please their master , who they know likes well enough of it ; as also for that it is a butcherly and beastly custome that they haue long kept , and therefore either cannot , or are loath to leaue it . Deeming them-selues , both then , and at all times , to bee the onely Lords and Masters of the world ; not considering in the meane while , that neither hee , nor they , haue any farther power , then to put thee in safe custodie , and that without offering thee any the least wrong or iniurie in leading thee thither .

Iust after this manner as I haue told thee , will they violently ( though thou be neuer so willing to goe quietly along with them ) thrust thee this way , and Prisons , and their keepers , what kind of things they be . that way , neuer leauing off to trouble and torment thee , till they haue brought thee to prison . Now , will you that I shall tell you , what manner of house this is , what the vsage , what you are there to endure , and what kinde of life you must leade there ? you shall meet with it hereafter in its proper place ; Let it suffice for the present , that if it shall one day be thy hap to come thither , ( which God forbid ) after that they haue treated thee ill vpon the way in bringing thee thither , and peraduenture pickt either thy purse , or thy pocket , and rob'd thee of such moneys as thou hadst about thee , they will put thee into the hands of some churlish Iaylor , or some vnder-keeper of his , ( as dogged a rogue as his master ) who , as if thou wert his slaue , will accommodate thee in that ill fauored filthy manner , as he him-selfe shall thinke fit , nor canst thou hope for better , vnlesse thou come off liuely , and pay well for it . Be it better or be it worse , thou must take all patiently , and pocket it with silence ; for thou art in his house , not in thine owne ; and in another bodies power , &c. There , neither The hard condition of prisoners . brauings , nor threatnings , great words , nor bigge lookes , will stead thee any thing at all ; for they are such bug-beares them-selues , that they awe all , but feare none .

Then will they bring thee before the Alcayde , or his Deputie , or some such like imperious officer or other , before whom thou must be faine to come with cap in hand , crowching and creeping vnto him , studying new inuentions of doing reuerence and respect vnto him ; making new kind of legges , and other vnaccustomed courtsies and congies vnto him ; though I count this no such great matter , being rather more troublesome , then hurtfull . For I must truly confesse vnto you , that there are some Alcaydes , that carry them-selues as fathers towards those that are brought before them ; and for mine owne part , I euer found them so towards me , so that I cannot iustly complaine of them . True it is , they will liue by their Offices , as other men doe , they haue no other meanes to maintaine them , it is the trade , whereunto they must trust . Besides , they come not gratis to these places of gouernment . If they will come by them , they must buy them . Wherefore they doe thee a great fauour , if they doe thee Iudges doe a great fauour , if they doe thee Iustice . iustice ; if by their meanes thou come to recouer thine owne , and if they giue way to thee , either to escape with life , or to sustaine it , or quietly to order thine owne house , or to liue setled in thy owne estate without disturbance , or to defend and make good thy plea. But in ●…ne he is thy Alcayde , he that must iudge and censure , either thee , or thy cause ; He may , or may not , wish thee well ; He hath the Law in his owne hands ; thy liberty , or imprisonment lyes in his power . Well ; when thou com'st to follow thy cause , thou must goe adoring thy Proctor , or thy Lawyer ; but beare this in minde too I pray , that I now say vnto thee , that I say nothing of him ; for that hath its When , and it s Where , its time , and its place , as your f f Saualo . A knowne fish , and of a very good relish . And may be cal'd quasi Sapalo , à Sapore . In Latine they call it Alopa , tri●…a , clupea . It vsually dies , when it comes into fresh water . Vid. Rondelecius de Piscibus , lib. 7. cap. 15. Savalo-pyes for the holy weeke ; its weeke shall come to , when it shall be best in season .

In briefe , that I may not trouble my selfe twice with one subiect , and one and the selfe-same kinde of people ; I plainly tell thee , that they will be thy masters , and that thou must suffer them , and beare with them , and not only be a slaue vnto thy Lawyer , but to thy Solicitour , the Notarie , the Master of the Office , the Clarke of the Pleas , the keeper of the papers , and the boy , that is to goe with thy Plea to thy Lawyer . But in case , thou goe home to his house , or his office thy selfe , and thou finde him retired into his chamber , or some other priuate with-drawing roome , dispatching of others , and thou stand waiting , looking still when it will come to thy turne to be called in , like those , that standing on the bancke of a Riuer , expect a boat to come ouer vnto them from the other side , thou wilt be so tyred out with knocking thy heeles against aforme , that thou wouldst rather stay the comming forth of some furious Bull , then of him . After all this , when thou hast made a large relation of the whole He that hath to d●… with Lawy●… , must dance attendance . businesse vnto him , and how the case stands , he will tell thee , that hee will burne his bookes , and giue ouer the Law , if thy businesse goe not with thee ; This is their common language towards all their Clients , but they neither satisfie their expectation , nor performe their owne promise ; for I neuer saw any of them , when their causes miscarried , either burne their bookes , or leaue their practise . And will haue one thing or other to excuse themselues ; As that the businesse was not well followed , that diligence was not vsed therein , which should haue beene , or that it was his Clarkes fault , and none of his , who was out of the way , when his businesse was to be done , being either gone , at that very instant , with his children to Schoole , or to wait on his Mistris to Church , by whose default the opportunity was lost of drawing the Petition . Your Aduocate , hath some smacke of the Law , but little of learning . He dictates , but does not write ; and the reason is , because they take them too soone from Schoole , that they may with as little losse of time as they can , apply them to these studies , whether that they were sent thither somewhat of the latest by their friends , being kept too long from Schoole at first ; or whether out of a couetous desire that they had , to haue them fall presently vpon the g g The Bookes of the Ciuill Law , which being in many huge Volumes , and scattered peeces , Iustinian the Emperor caused to be digested into a lesser number , and better forme ; whence they were called Digests . Digests , leauing the Principles indigested . As if good writing should not presuppose good reading , and good reading , and good writing together , beget good Orthography , and bring forth at last a good Latine-tongue , which like linckes that belong to one chaine , ought both to be learned , and ioyned together .

But of this enough : Let vs now passe on to some other Theame . For here , we doe but care out our cloakes , and spend our time to little purpose , and lesse profit . Let vs come to your ordinary Iudge , of whom I haue said some-thing Your ordinary Iudge , what manner of fellow he is . vnto you already , nor know I well , what I should say more , saue that he makes open sale of Iustice , hucking with you , to bring you vp to their price , and if you refuse to giue them , what they require of you , they will plainly tell you , you shall looke for no Iustice from them ; for it is worth more then they aske , and that such a one , that stands there by thee , payd a great deale more for it , then he now demands of thee .

But say thou shouldst appeale , and come to some superior Iudge , which seldome happeneth , in regard the fish dies here first , or is at least so staru'd in this Your superior Iudge , what manner of man he is shallow brooke , before it can recouer that sea , that it comes thither without any Spawne , poore , and vnprofitable . Thy money is all gone , thou art needy , and not able to wage Law , for want of meanes ; There thou shalt not find those priuate interests , and particular profits which they make to themselues ; but thou shalt meet perhaps with passions , which sometimes proue as bad . And as their purses , haue not paid for thy breeding , so what care they whether thou be whipt or hang'd . Six yeeres , more or lesse , for which terme thou art condemned to the Galleyes , what is it to them ? It hurts not them ; They are not sensible of it ; they feele not that , which thou feelest ; nor suffer that , which thou sufferest . These , I tell thee , are the Gods vpon earth , they goe to their goodly houses , where they are well attended ; they passe through the streets , where they are honoured , and adored , and feared of the people . What care then canst thou thinke , or conceiue with thy selfe , that they should take of such a poore soule as thou art ? It is in their hands , to saue thee , or condemne thee ; and so they will deale with thee , as their owne passions shall incline them to thy good , or hurt ; or as some great and powerfull friends shall perswade with them .

I knew a certaine Iudge in Sevill , who condemned a fellow in poena pecuniaria , to pay such a summe of money by way of mulct for his offence that he had A horrible sentence of a Iudge of Sevill . committed . Out of which he awarded two hundred ducats to be paid into the Chamber of Sevill by way of fine : with this command or proviso in the sentence ; That not being able to pay in the said summe , he should be sent to serue in the Galleyes for ten yeeres , and to rowe at the Oare like a slaue , of free cost , without receiuing one penny of pay . And when the terme of those his ten yeeres were expired , he should be brought backe againe to prison to the said Citie of Sevill , and from thence to the market-place , where he was to be hanged on the common gallowes .

Had it beene my case , before I would haue giuen such a foolish sentence , I should rather haue ordered it thus ; That he should haue beene hang'd first , The answer of a country Clowne , to an ignorant Painter . and afterwards sent vnto the Galleys ; sure , the cart , in this case , should haue gone before the horse . Iumping for all the world with that which was said to an ignorant and vnskilfull painter , who talking one day in company , that ere long he would white his house , and afterwards paint it ; nay , said one of the standers-by , you shall doe much better , if you paint it first , and white it afterwards .

There are some Iudges , whose tongues , so out-runne their discretion , that whatsoeuer comes first to mouth , it must out , nay , and must stand for good , though his owne iudgement vpon its better consideration , chide his tongue for being too forward . And if he that is Assessor with him , and is ioyned as his fellow-Iudge in Commission with him , shall take vpon him to moderate the matter , and seeme but the least way to crosse what he hath done , or shall but abate the least tittle of what he hath decreed , or in any manner at all to mitigate the rigour of his sentence , it is as if you should take a thing from the Altar ; so sacred , doe these vnhallowed Iudges , hold their owne actions ; Taking it as an indignitie , not to be endured . Looke well into the businesse then , and consider with thy selfe , how much the lesser euill it is of the two , that he that hath offended thee , should goe away with this his insolencie , and thou thereby remaine free from some great inconuenience . Which thou oughtest to permit , not only ( as hath beene said before ) that thou maist not be subiect to so many ; but also , that thou maist not hurt thy selfe , by putting thy house out of order , and ( by consequence ) thy honour and person in perill , as also that of thy wife , thy children , and thy whole estate .

But perhaps thou wilt say vnto me : O , it is not fit , that this Villaine , that hath thus wronged me , should carry it away so , and laugh at me when he has It is a good thing in any man , to neglect 〈◊〉〈◊〉 . done . I confesse it is not fit , nor is there any reason , why it should be so : yet , if thou must needs be laught at , it were better but one should laugh at thee , then many . For if thou wilt but hold thy peace , and seeme not to be moued at it , but to let it passe , and take no notice thereof , only he can laugh at thee in his sleeue that hath done thee this wrong ; but if thou seeke to right thy selfe by Law , and be afterwards ouerthrowne , thousands will laugh at thee , that thou shouldst be such a foole , to cast away thy money so wilfully amongst the Lawyers , hauing bought nothing therewith but meere smoake , and a little of their vnprofitable breath ; and that Lawyer , will scoffe and deride thee most , that hath put thee in most hope , because by that meanes he hath most pickt thy purse .

Well , you will say , it may be so , I care not for all this ; Let the worst come , that can come , there are many Churches to flie vnto for shelter , and the world is wide enough for vs all . Tell me ( thou ignorant man ) thinkest thou to excuse one error with another ? Suppose the best that can befall thee in this case , it is no more but temporis dilatio , a little gaining of time . Neither there ( no not in the Church ) wilt thou be able to endure either the Priest , or his Curate , or that worshipfull master his Sexton . And what thinkst thou , that thou must suffer , that they may beare with thee , and giue thee leaue to stay amongst them ? Thinkst thou , there is no more in it then so , to say , I will goe to some Church , or other , and there take Sanctuary ? Thou wilt meet with more troubles there , then thou art aware of . This incommodate accommodating of thy selfe , will cost thee money , nor canst thou continue there for euer . Thinkest thou it so small an inconuenience , to leaue thine owne home , and so to goe seeke thy fortune in forraine Countries ? If haply thou be a Spaniard , ( as I my selfe am ) wheresoeuer thou shalt come , thou art sure to be an vnwelcome guest , thou shalt be ill receiued amongst them , how faire a show soeuer they make thee ; for we haue this aduantage of all other nations in the world , that we are more abhorred The Spaniards hated in all places , and of all persons . in all places , and of all persons , then any other people vnder the Sunne ; but whose fault it is , I know not . Thou goest wandring through desarts , from Inne to Inne , from a priuate lodging , to a common vittayling house . Thinkst thou , that they are all honest people , that haue for their Patron the good King , Don Alonso ? Inne-keepers , and Vittaylers , thou knowest not ( poore silly soule ) what kinde of vermine they are , and therefore thou set'st so light by them , and seek'st not to flie from them .

Lastly , thou shalt endure many inconueniences in these thy trauels abroad ; suffering heats and colds , winde and raine , bad weather , and bad wayes , and The inconueniences that befall Trauellers . with it the distastfull company of diuers distinct Nations ; one while it raines , another while it snowes , the riuers rise , and thou canst not passe , night is neere , and thy Inne farre off , it growes darke as pitch , and the clouds furiously discharge vpon thee their lightning and thunder ; and for that thou art of an impatient spirit , thou hadst rather dye a thousand deaths , then endure it .

Goe to then ; goe thy wayes at last ; leaue off these thy idle thoughts of going to Law ; sit downe rather with losse , and liue in peace . For it is better Good counsell for those that will liue 〈◊〉 quiet . that the world should say of thee , that thou art a patient wise man , then a reuengefull foole . What haue they either done , or said vnto thee , that thou keep'st such a coyle , and that no man was euer so wrong'd , as thou art ? If that be true , which they haue spoken of thee , it is thou that hast giuen them cause so to doe ; and if they lye , a lye is a lye , and he that lyes , let him goe like a lyar as he is . And therefore he did not thee so much wrong as himselfe , nor hast thou any reason to be reuenged on another by indangering thy selfe . Neglect him , and let him goe for a knaue , as he is ; for thou canst not take a fuller reuenge of him , nor punish him more , then to let him passe for an idle foole , and follow thine owne businesse . I haue spoken enough of this , thinke vpon it , it may make much for thy good , if thou wilt well weigh , what I haue said vnto thee . But I must returne againe into my old way , and now I am entring into it .

CHAP. IV.

Guzman de Alfarache , being freed out of prison , falls to gaming , gets money ; Whereupon , he resolues with himselfe to goe to Millayne .

I Came out of prison , and got me to my lodging , being as sad and melancholy , as I was poore and miserable ; Guzman comes heauy and melancholy out of prison . saying to Sayavedra ; What doest thou thinke of the good market , that we haue made in this fayre ? We may make merry with the gaines we haue got , this will serue for once to keepe vs out of beggerie , we need no money now , let vs spend , and be liuely . Consider now I pray with your selfe , vpon what a sure ground they goe , who seeke to recouer their owne by Law . He told me , Sir , I see how things are carryed , for I haue beene an eye-witnesse of all that hath past ; but what remedy is there to be had , against the passions and priuate interests of Iudges , and the force and power of the potent ? But that which toucheth me neerest , and grieues me most , is ; That you will finde fault with me , and be offended with me , that I haue beene the instrument of this your wrong , and more particularly at this present by that counsell and aduice , which I gaue you , to recouer your goods . Which though it were done all for the best , hath vnfortunately fallen out to the worst . Sed homo proponit , & Deus disponit . Man proposeth one thing , and God disposeth another . Who would euer haue dream't , that things would haue fallen out as they doe ? What should him say vnto it ? There is now no helpe for it . For as a man cannot auoyde the stone , which a foole throwes by chance ou●… a house , and kills him therewith : So , much lesse was it to be imagined , or once to be suspected by vs , that such a businesse as this , so faire , and so full of truth , should proue so dis-proportionable , and so quite opposite to our vnderstanding .

Whilest we were thus talking of this matter , there com's me a couple of guests that were strangers into the Inne , challenged by a young man of that Citie , to play at Cards . And in a little square roome , that diuided their chamber from mine , they had set vp a table , and to play they goe . Now I walking vp and downe that way , in my passing to and fro , seeing what past amongst them , I was desirous ( for to entertaine the time , and to driue away melancholy ) to draw neerer vnto them , and to looke vpon them . I did so , and pulling a stoole vnto me , taking that which came first to hand , I sate me downe , viewing one of their hands for the sp●…ce of some two houres , or more , in all which time there was little or nothing lost on either part . The money went to and fro ; losing one while , and getting another ; Fortune had show'd her selfe so equall , that shee had made them in a manner all sauers ; what was wonne , was not worth the speaking of , there being no difference to be discerned in that they had drawne before they began . Euery man entertained himselfe with his owne money which he drew at first , expecting a lucky pull , whilest I in the meane while had a shrewder pull in mine owne bosome . They had not that griping them-selues , yet did they cause it in me , without any other why , or wherefore , The nature and condition of those that stand by , looking vpon Gamesters . saue only by my looking on his cards , by whom I sate , when either he lost through want of good carding , or well-playing of his game .

O what a strange nature are we made of , which I speake not only of my selfe , but of all in generall ; for no●… any one of these men being knowne vnto me ; nor hauing euer seene them before in my life , ( for this was the first flight I had made of comming abroad since the time of my imprisonment ) hauing neuer conuersed with them heretofore , being all alike strangers vnto me , yet me thought I was much ioyed , and was glad with all my heart , when he did winne , my affection inclining to haue fortune show her selfe more fauourable vnto him , then the rest ; and on the contrary was sorry , when I saw he lost . See what a kinde of sinne this was in mee ; how vnprofitable to my selfe ? how foolish and to no purpose , to desire that the other two might lose , that hee might rise the winner , and goe away with their money , as if my selfe had beene interessed therein , or as if they had got it from me , or were bound to let me haue it .

O , what an indiscretion , what an ignorance is it , to lay other mens burthens on our owne shoulders ; which are neither of any moment in themselues , nor of any benefit vnto vs ! One stands peeping out at his window , and another Needlesse curiositie . with his head halfe out at his doore , watching only to see , who went out of his neighbours house before day , who came in at midnight , what they brought in , and what they carryed out , led only thereunto out of an idle and needlesse curiositie ; by reason whereof they runne into a thousand suspitions , a thousand iealousies of such things , which neuer were , nor could be , much lesse to be gathered from them , or any way in the world to be imagined by them . Brother , or Sister , who ere thou be , get thee gone , leaue off thy prying into others actions , God helpe vs all ; thou doest not know , whether such a one Men ought not to prie into other mens actions . sinneth , or not sinneth ; whether he doth this , or that other thing , or doth it not : and it may be , that he doth not sinne , but I am sure that thou doest sinne in doing as thou doest . Tell me , what doth his death , or his life , his going in , or his comming out , concerne thee ? What good doest thou get by it , or what reward doe they giue thee , for that thy nights watching , so ill bestowed on thy selfe , and others ? What honour , shalt thou reape by his dishonour ? What contentment canst thou take therein ? Say , by this diligence of thine , thou maist haply haue occasion to doe him some friendly office , and bestead him in time of need . It may be so . But this is so contrary a thing , to men of such base condition , that I assure my selfe , nay I dare to seale it with an oath , that thou wouldst not doe it .

If thy neighbour , fearing some thieues would come that night to rob him , should speake vnto thee to take the paines to sit vp & watch his house for him , & should very earnestly entreat thee so to do , tell me , and lye not , what wouldst thou say vnto him ? what answere wouldst thou make him ? Certainly , thou wouldst tell him , That thou hast enough to doe , to looke vnto thine owne , that euery man is bound to respect himselfe first ; and that thou wilt not stand freezing in the cold , nor indanger thine owne health for to benefit another . How comes it then to passe , that to doe thy neighbour a good turne , and to exercise thy charity towards him , thou wilt not watch a quarter of an houre with him , and yet , that thou maist bring his faults to light , and lay open his Profitable counsell for curious obseruers of other mens faults . spots to the S●…nne , thou wilt thus play the foole to sit vp a whole night to see if thou canst light vpon any oblique action , that thou maist lay in his dish hereafter ? Doest thou not perceiue by this time , how ill this doth become thee ? Seest thou not , that I say the truth ? Thou canst not ( if thou wilt but examine thy selfe ) but know , that it were better for thee , and would stand a great deale more with thine owne health , to get thee to bed betimes , and to looke how things goe at home in thine owne house , and to let those of thy neighbour alone . Wilt thou , to doe him a despight , charge thine owne soule with those sinnes , of which thy neighbour is free , whence his comes to be saued , and thine to be damned ? Such a one plaies to winne , and to increase his stocke , and it grieues me forsooth , that such a one should win , or such a one lose . Iust so it goes , and no otherwise . If thou take pleasure in looking on those that game , M●…n that looke vpon Gamesters must 〈◊〉 fr●… passion . looke on ( if thou canst ) without passion . But thou canst not doe it ; for thou art , as I am ; and thou wilt doe , as I doe . Of the two , I should hold it the lesser euill , that thou shouldst play thy selfe , then looke vpon anothers game with such like passion ; For he that plaies , it is well enough knowne , that he desires to winne ; and this is a battaile , that is fought betweene two wits , or foure . Thou , being confident of thy good fortune , doest aduenture thy money , at least thou desirest , that they may not carry it away from thee , thou seek'st to defend thy selfe as well as thou canst , and thou settest thy selfe downe to play with that credence and beleefe , that thou maist as well lose , as win , and as well get theirs , as they get thine ; In this thou seem'st to haue some reason , and deseruest to be excused . But that onely by looking on , a man of reason , and vnderstanding , whom the businesse nothing concernes , should bee so blinded with passion , as to be affected , or dis-affected in that violent fashion , tell mee if I doe amisse , in styling him to be a man depriued of true iudgement , and whether I may not lawfully condemne him for it . But to returne to our purpose ; Continuing their play , within a little while after , the Sea began to swell , the The effects of game , and gamesters . waues grew high , and the money began to swimme from one side of the boord to the other , their bloods waxed hot , and their choller began to kindle , they were now at their close fights , watching but aduantage to boord , or sinck each other ; they grapled hard for it on all sides , & the Cards likewise they plaid their parts , and laid about them for life , bestirring them-selues lustily , and gaue one of them such a blow on the head with his club , that hee was strucken ouer boord , and he and all his money suncke , hauing lost in that fight aboue a hundred Crownes . And this man , that had this great blow giuen him , was he in whose hand I lookt . Of whose losse I was as sensible , as if the case had beene mine owne ; thinking with myselfe , that I had brought him this ill luck , and that I was the instrument of this his bad fortune . Which did grieue me so much the more , for that I vnderstood , that he was not worth in all the world so much more , as he had then lost .

Gaming ought to be vsed for two manner of ends ; either for meere gaine , Gaming , is vsed for two causes . or to entertaine the time . If for gaine , I say nothing vnto it , saue that those , who bend them-selues that way , are like vnto Pyrats , that put them-selues forth to sea to purchase some prize . Capiat qui capere potest ; catch , he that can catch ; Let euery one arme his own ship , as well as he can , and haue an eie to the bullets that flie about his eares , and those other warlike weapons which they vse in such kinde of fights . Who goe scouring the Seas a whole yeare , in hope to meet with one lucky day .

They that play for intertainment , should bee onely such , whom the Cards them-selues doe marke and point out vnto vs ; In them , shall we picke out some learning ; for if we shall but consider the Kings a a The Court-Cards are called in Spaine , Rey , Cauallo , y Sota . The first is the King , as with vs ; The second signifies a Knight , which is all one with our Queene ; And the third a Soldier , which is the same with our Knaue . , the Queenes , and the Knanes , that are there pictured and painted forth vnto vs , from the vppermost of all the other , to the lowest , which is the Ace , you shall not finde any portraitures or shapes as in the former ; giuing vs thereby to vnderstand , that none should play there-at but Kings , Queenes , and Knanes . I can assure you that in all the whole packe of Cardes , you meete not with any Merchants , Trades-men , Lawyers , nor Diuines , for they are not befitting their professions . The very Aces , speake as much vnto vs ; for from the Knaue , or rather Sota , which is the Souldier , downe to the Ace , which is the least and last Card , thou shalt see nothing else but spots , admonishing vs thereby , that all ( except the aforesaid ) are but Asses , that shall offer to play at Cards . And such another Asse was this my adoptiue sonne , in losing that , which perhaps was none of his owne , nor had wherewith to pay , at least could hardly spare it .

But I will not straine this string so hard , that I should quite debarre men of these noble entertainments ; for I will not call him a gamester , who plaies but now and then for his recreation , once , or twice , halfe a dozen , or halfe a score times in a yeare , for this cannot hurt him much ; especially if he doe not play out of a greedy desire of gaine , but onely for sport and pastime . Howbeit I hold it a thing impossible , that a man should set himselfe to play , without a 〈◊〉 gamesters desire to win . desire to winne , though it should be but for a pinne , and that he play , with his wife , or his sonne . For although a man doe not stake money ( and so cannot be said to play for couetousnesse of the coyne ) yet the opinion of a mans vnderstanding and iudgement , lies then at stake , and there is no man so meane spirited , and of that weaknesse of nature , that would willingly be beaten by another , if he could otherwise chuse .

This my man , I told you of , was one of the guests to the house , where I lay , the winnings were diuided betweene his companion and the Citizen ; the quarrell ceased for that time , and a fresh challenge was made against after supper . And so they brake off , the winners going each their way , as their seuerall occasions lay ; and the loser , to looke out more money . I doubt not but hee vs'd all the diligence he could to get more ( for gamesters soldome want money to game , though scarce euer haue any to pay their debts : ) but because it is a Money , hard to be got . massie kinde of mettall , and waighes very heauy , it sinkes downe still to the bottome , and is long and hard a getting vp againe ; hee could not ( it should seeme ) get any money , yet he came thither , though without it ; more offended with those that would not lend it him , then with those who had got it from him . He went walking and raging vp and downe the roome , puffing Losers grow impartent . and blowing like a Bull ; all the whole chamber was too little for him . One while he walkes athwart it , another , stalkes along from one end to the other , then againe flings me from one corner to the other corner , huffing and chafing , nothing could content him , all was vexation of spirit , he railes vpon the Citie , and vpon that traytor , that was the cause of his comming thither , that that was no Country for honest men to dwell in , but for thieues and cut-throats , being that he had in that towne , a hundred knowne friends , and all of them rich and well moneyd men , yet could he not borrow one Royall 〈◊〉 them all , and began to sweare that he would doe this , and that , and I know not what , if it should be his hap to meet with any of them in his owne Countrie . I gaue him the hearing , and held my peace . And when he went into his chamber , I might heare him sit downe on his bed-side , and might from mine , heare likewise the blowes , which he gaue with his fist vpon the table that stood by him .

I cal'd Sayavedra aside , and told him ; Occasion is now offered vnto me , either Guzman means to venture ad his money at play , and to make himselfe either a man , or a mouse . to get out of my troubles , or to get me to an Hospitall . And seeing that small store of money which is remaining vnto me , is not so much , as to sustaine vs any long time , let vs sup well , or goe to bed with a iarre of water , all 's one , as good to day , as to morrow , for hold out much longer wee cannot . What thinkst thou of this ? tell me thy opinion , whether I shall play the foole , or the wise man in doing that which I intend ? Shall it not bee well done , that after supper , when the same company shall meet againe together , wanting a third to maintaine the combat , I should come forth as a challenger into the lists , aduenturing to runne my Lance amongst the rest , putting my selfe vpon fortune either to lose , or winne the honor of the day , by hazarding those few Crownes that I haue ? Sayavedra made answer vnto me , That I should haue him euer ready at hand vpon all occasions , being that he had now set vp his rest to doe Sayavedra offers to discouer to Guzman the others games . me seruice , and that hee would carefully doe whatsoeuer I would haue him , spake I in earnest , or in iest , and were it good , or ill that I should vndergoe , he would alwaies sticke close vnto me , and be still at mine elbow , to performe that which I should be pleas'd to command him . Yet norwithstanding , that vpon this occasion , I might not come off with dishonor ( for wee were then driuen very low , and almost brought to beggers bush ) it were good to secure the businesse . Wherefore he would marshall things in that manner , that both safely , and subtlely , he would range all ouer the field , and euermore giue me aduice of my aduersaries forces , and how and where their strength lay , and when I was to charge them home , as likewise to make my retreat ; so that he keeping a true account of their Cards , and the numbers wherewith they were to set vpon me , it was not possible that I should lose . When hee had said thus much vnto me , a man might haue pul'd my skin ouer mine eares , and I should neuer haue felt it , for I was for very ioy , ready to leape out of it my selfe ; for my ability at play , and the skill and cunning that I had in handling the Cards , being holpen by his aduice , there was no doubt to be made , but that I might easily conuert three parts of their money to mine owne vse . Saying secretly to my selfe ; No ay mal , que no venga p●…r bien : There is no ill , which doth not turne to our Prouerbe . good . And it may bee that by this meanes , I might recouer my selfe of those losses , which I had so lately receiued . I did long my selfe to haue told him as much , but I did desire this base action , should proceed rather out of his mouth , then mine . For I was willing in this to keepe that decorum which beseemeth Masters must keepe a decorum with their seruants . a Master with his seruant . For otherwise , if this tricke should haue beene plaid out of my hand , Sayavedra would happely haue said to himselfe ; See , what a fine master I serue ! I haue rid my selfe of a thiefe , and haue lighted vpon a cheater . What a tree haue I taken , whereunto to leane ? Had it not beene better for me to haue gone and leaned against a wall ? Yes certainly , for that would not haue thus deceiu'd me . Stay , stay , ( Sayavedra ) for all you were my friend , it was no part of my meaning , to open my minde vnto you in that straine , doe you enter first , and you will , vpon the point of my sword , and if you haue a mind to it , come on a Gods name when you please ; for I promise you , you shall first confesse your selfe to me , before you haue any confession from mee ; I will haue a pawne first from you , before you haue any pledge from me . But when we 〈◊〉 once vnmasked our selues , and cast off all disguises on either side , let vs come off freely , deale plainly one with another , I will speake what I thinke , ●…nd thou shalt speake what thou thinkst ; Let vs iumpe as well in bredth , as in length , and then there will be little ods and difference betweene vs in the rec●…oning . There he and I were disputing a great while with our selues , which ●…gnes would ●…e best , whereby we might come to know both the others hands ; And at last it was resolu'd on , that the best manner of doing it , would bee by Guzmans and Sayavedras drift . the buttons of his ierking , or the ioynts of the fingers , according to the arte of the Gammuth , when we learne first to sing . And hauing made triall thereof some three or foure bouts , we grew so ready and so perfect therein , that wee now vnderstood one another better by these our tokens , then our tongues .

Now were the challengers entred the lists , whilst I was walking vp and down there in the roome with my Rosario in my hand , like a Hermite , my seruant being in the meane while in my lodging . They began to talke of falling afresh to play ; whereupon , the third man told them what had passed , and that hee could not meet with those his friends that should haue furnisht him with money , but if they would trust him vpon his word , till the next day morning , see whatsoeuer he should lose vnto them vpon the ticket , he would truly pay them . The Citizen sayd , that he should be well content therewith for his part , but told him withall , there was no heart in it , and that it was a kind of dull and tedious sport , and that he had neuer any good lucke , but did alwaies lose , when he plaid vpon the Ticket . But the other would by no meanes giue way therevnto . Whereupon their gaming was at the best , the company was vpon breaking off , and euery one going his way ; but when I saw this good conuersation was vpon dissoluing , leauing my Beades to keepe their owne reckoning , I stepe forth , and said vnto them ; Since this Gentleman doth not play , so as you will not play too great play , but onely for entertainment , and no more , but to passe away some part of the night , and that so holy a worke may not bee left off for want of a third , if it please you , I will put my selfe vpon the Cards , and trie for a while how well they will deale with me . The other two , were very glad of this , the motion pleas'd them passing well ; for they took me to be some young Thrush , that was new crept out of the shell , and had not my bill growne out , and was not able to pecke at any thing . Making reckning , that all was their owne , if they got me in to play , and that my money was as sure theirs , as if they had had it already in their purse . And for that they thought , if I should chance to lose my money , I would also venture my chaine ( which I of purpose discouered vnto them by vnbuttoning my ierkin ) and if I were once bitten , and began to bleed , being a young man , as I was , I would not haue the patience to giue ouer , but throw the pot-hookes after the pot , and the helue after the hatchet , and lose all , that I was able to make .

Well , we were now set downe , and ready to goe to the businesse , whereupon The cheating tricks that are vs'din gaming . I called for Sayavedra , and said vnto him ; Goe fetch me some money , if you haue any siluer left , bring it me quickly . He presently drew out a hundred royals , which I had giuen him before , that he might haue them in readinesse , when I called for them . He abiding a while in my chamber , till our play grew a little warme , and then calling him to snuffe the candles , I said vnto him , seeming as if I had beene angry with him ; Are we to be vsed thus by thee ? Haue you so much businesse to doe in the chamber , or are you so drowsie-headed , that you cannot stay here in the roome , if we should at any time haue occasion to vse you ? He said neuer a word , but stood still , and held his peace , insomuch that no man in the world would haue once suspected any harme from him , for he neuer offered so much as to cast but an eye vpon me , nor did he at any time remoue his hand from his bosome , by which meanes he gaue me true knowledge how their games went . And howbeit , we vnderstood one another well enough , I would sometimes of purpose seeme not to vnderstand him , nor would I make vse of his warie aduice , but when I had wonne two or three hands , I tooke pleasure now and then to lose a little . I did suffer them now and then to draw my money , but neither much , nor often , left when they had me on the lift , they might haue left off : I was content they should touch it , but not enter vpon it ; and afterwards I would charge them home , that I might , hauing once netled them , egg them 〈◊〉 the more . I did skirmish with them in that cunning manner , that I made them still come on more and more eager vpon my money . But when I began to suspect , that they would giue ouer the fight , and sound a retreat , and that they were to leaue the field , and be gone , I then thought fit to pursue them to some purpose , and to follow the chase a little more hotly , till I saw them safe in the net , and had them in my hands , to doe what I would with them , and then did I set roundly vpon them and their money , bringing it all vnder my subiection in a very short ●…ace , few blowes being strucken in the battaile . I had got of those two , all that they had gained of the other before . Whereof they were so ashamed , and so stung withall , that they swore they would haue another bout with me the next day , challenging me againe at the same game . I willingly accepted of it . They came , we playde , and I was willing to let them winne some thirty Crownes of me , which they carried away with them , giuing ouer play for th●…●…ime ; for , this losse , was but a bayte that I laid for them , knowing that this would flesh them , and put them in heart a-new , and make them come on brauely at our next meeting . Yet one of them was willing to continue longer , and said ; Let vs play greater game , for that the night growes late . Nay ( quoth 1 ) by the same reason , it were better that we goe now to bed , and meet againe to morrow , which if you like of it , and be at leysure , we may come together somewhat sooner , and taking the day before vs , we may play at pleasure , and as long as we lift . They were wondrous glad to heare me say so , and that they had yet lost somewhat vnto mee , hoping in the end that they should get more by me .

The next day they came , with their purses well arm'd with double pistolets , well appointed for warre , they threw downe whole handfuls of them vpon the boord , some being peeces of two , some of foure , and some of ten , seeming to make no more reckning of them , then if they had beene so many peeces of copper coyne . Saying , as they flung them downe ; Coraggio , coraggio ( Senor Soldado ) see you what here is , to be spent in your seruice ? I told them ; Although I am not so rich , as to be able to doe you seruice with so large a supply of money , yet at least my good will shall not be wanting to attend vpon you , as your seruant . I was about to tell them , that I did not doubt e●…e long to see this faire companie of these glittering men at armes to come and march vnder my colours . We began to play , and I went wearying of them out by little and little , giuing them line enough to runne them-selues out of breath , and when I saw , that I had now brought them euen with me , and that I might strike them both dead at once , I let flie a whole volley of shot at them , and in a few hands , I saw in these hands of mine aboue fiue hundred Crownes , which yeelded themselues vp to my mercy , whom ( out of the pittifulnesse o●… my nature ) I tooke into my protection . The maine battaile being thus ouerthrowne , my two Captaines were faine to forsake the field , after these their bravado's , and to try if they could leuie fresh men , and raise new forces to encounter me againe the next day , promising to bid me battaile , if I durst abide it . I was not a little glad to heare them say so , as well for that I had let them blood both alike ; as also , for that my heart was now pretty well at quiet ; holding my selfe very well pleas'd with that which I had gotten of them , being as well contented , as if I had wonne all that they had beene worth . For I had now enough to serue my turne , and what should I desire more ? But I cannot expresse vnto you how glad I was , that they should giue ouer fi●…st ; for it was a rule , which I euer obserued in my play , that I would not willingly g●…ue any the least occasion of difference ; and therefore did euermore lea●…e it to the losers owne good liking , to play , or not to play ; referring it to his choice , as he himselfe had most minde to . They went away in a good houre ; and I fearing , that this Townes-man , might put a Towne-tricke vpon me , and that the stranger , being in need , and in want , might doe me some wrong ( for I was lately , to my great cost , too well acquainted what good iustice a man was to looke for in that Citie ) I told Sayavedra , when we were alone by our selues , that without any word speaking , or telling any body , whither we intended to goe , we would take horse betimes in the morning , and poste with all speed to Millayne . And so we did , leauing them full of sorrow , but not so much as one crosse of siluer , wherewith to blesse themselues .

CHAP. V.

Guzman de Alfarache , trauayling towards Millayne , Sayavedra vpon the way , recounts his owne life vnto him .

WE rode towards Millayne , with as great haste , as feare . For Bologna standing so high as it does , it is to be disc●…rned a great way of , the very shadow whereof , did make my heart to tremble , fearing the danger , whereinto it had lately put me . For I was euer of the minde , That there is no fault , but hath his punishment ; no ill , but hath his chastisement . Now did I wish , that horses had beene borne with wings , that mine might haue flowne away with me . But miserable wretch that I am , what good would that haue done me ? it had beene all one to me ; for then others , would likewise haue had the like horses , to haue ouer-taken me . What way so euer I tooke , I found it all full of thornes , bushes , and brambles , which did scratch , and pricke my The condition of feare , and fearefull men . guilty conscience ; which way soeuer I went , I was fearefull of danger ; and the more slownesse , the more feare . And he neuer thinks he flyes fast enough , that seekes to flie from a mischiefe . I , accompanied with my thoughts , and Sayavedra with his , went iogging on along , but both as mute as fishes ; though his were farre different from mine . For my care only was , to see my selfe in some place of safetie ; and Sayavedra was thinking with himselfe , how much of this money would fall to his share .

We rode on a great while in this manner ; at last , that I might bid feare farewell , which thus troubled me , I sought to shake it off , and if I could , quite to forget it , by entertayning some one thing or other , to turne the streame another way ; it seeming vnto me , to be no lesse foolish , for a man , to be too silent vpon the way , then to babble and prate too much , in the street . And therefore , that I might be the first to breake the yce , I call'd to Sayavedra , and said vnto him ; Come , let vs talke of something or other , to passe away the time ; or doe thou tell me some storie vpon the way , to giue me content ; it will make our iourney the shorter . He then , finding his bowle flung in amongst the rest , and that he was not shut out for a bungler , seeing there was occasion now offered vnto him , to speake that , which he longed to vtter , he began to breake his mind●… , and said thus vnto me .

I wish Sir , that I could tell you a tale , how glad I was , and what a deale of good it did doe me , to taste of the sweetnesse of your gaines . But I am so confident of the noblenesse of your disposition , that this my comming to serue you ( seeing you haue beene pleased to entertaine me for your seruant ) shall not be only for satisfaction of that debt , wherein I stand bound vnto you , but also make much for my profit . I was glad to see this arrow flie forth of his quiuer , and that he had touch't mee vpon that string ; whereupon , I thus replyed vnto him .

Friend Sayavedra ; What is past , is past ; and there is no more to be said of it ; for there is no man , so much man , and master of himselfe , which either here , or there ; this place , or that ; this , or that time , doth not slip in one kinde or other . We liue all in the flesh ; and all flesh is weake . Others , haue this weaknesse , All men , spotted w●… one Vice , or other . some other wayes : Euery one committeth his errour , one in one sort ; another , in another . As thou hast in this thing , wherein my selfe am likewise faulty . God helpe me in my iudgement ; for I know not what will become of me . For I finde , I haue as much cause , as he that hath most , if not more , boldly to vndergoe any desperate attempt whatsoeuer . And let him be who , or what ●…e will , ( had he found himselfe in that grea want and miserie , as we were ) he ●…ould haue done the like , as we haue done : which was no better then plaine theft , to cozen these poore men , of that little which they had , which perhaps was all , that they had wherewithall to liue : Nor would I at that time , ( being in that poore case as I was ) haue spared any purse whatsoeuer , had it had a thousand Crownes in it , though it had beene of an Orphane , that had neither father , nor mother , to helpe it .

And seeing , that we are fallen into this errour , and for that I perceiue thou Guzmans craf●…ie dealing . hast vnderstanding and iudgement to apprehend any thing , and to go through with it , I perswade my selfe , thou doest likewise comprehend , that I am no Trader in the Indyes , nor any of your rich Fucaro's , but a poore young man , ( as thou art ) rob'd of his substance , and depriued of his necessaries , by such meanes , as are best knowne to thy selfe ; nor haue I any greater or better profession to liue by , then that which thou hast seene in me . Now , because I would not doe any thing , that might fauour of basenesse , or vnlike my selfe , and to beare the same port I did heretofore , I must endeuour to maintaine my selfe ( at least ) in some reasonable fashion , as euery honest man ought to doe , not falling a lot from that state and condition of life , wherein my parents left me , and whereunto my so tune had rays'd me . For albeit I seru'd that Lord of mine , the French Embassador , and liu'd in house with him , it was out of that loue , which he bore vnto me from a childe , and vpon the earnest intreaty , that he made vnto my friends , my father , and he , being of ancient acquaintance , and hauing liu'd and conuersed long together in Paris . And so he begg'd me of him , saying ; he should take no farther care for me , and that he would one day make me a man .

But since that things haue so fallen out with me as they haue , ( as in part you your selfe know ) and that I haue left his house , and am now come from him , I am not minded to returne thither any more , till I haue seene somewhat of the world , and that I may come home rich and in plenty , and be able to liue in ease and pleasure , all the rest of my life . Euery place a a Donde quiera , se amasa buen pan . affords good bread ; Prouerbe . and that of Rome , agrees not with my stomacke , for it doth not digest very well with me , but turnes to rawnesse and crudities . And it is no maruayle , that all men should seeke out some meanes or other to liue ; especially , seeing they , that haue lesser abilities , endeuour the like . Euery man would faine liue .

Turne thine eye aside , and looke vpon as many men , as now liue in the world ; view , and consider them well , and thou shalt finde , that they all goe seeking to encrease their estates , to aduantage themselues the best that they can ; and failing in those obligations , whereunto they are tide both in honor , and honestie , by one deuice or other , this or that tricke , euery one seekes to aduance himselfe and his fortunes , as high as he can . The King , seekes to All seeke to make their best aduantage . augment his State , and inlarge his Kingdome ; The Gentleman , to raise his House ; The Merchant , to encrease his wealth , and to driue such a trade , as may turne to his great profit ; And the Trades-man , to gaine by his Trade : And that not alwaies ( by their leaue ) in that conscionable and lawfull fashion as is fitting they should . For it happeneth so with some of them , that first growing knu●…kle deepe , and afterwards vp to the elbowes in vngodly gaine , and vniust dealing , they neuer leaue off till they be vp to the very eyes , nay ouer head and eares ( I will not say ) in Hell , doe thou say it for me , whose tongue is bolder then mine , to lay this censure vpon them . In conclusion , all the world in this case , is as it were another Rochelle ; Euery man liue for himselfe ; get hee , that can get ; Onely they , that are vnfortunate , as thou art , pay the punishment of their sinne . If thou hadst beene a thiefe of the largest size , I say one of those great ones , that shouldst haue gone away with three or foure thousand Duckats at a clap , thou mightst peraduenture haue made thy peace , bought out fauour and iustice , and mightst haue past well enough with them , and haue come off cleare , as they often doe : But those poore wretches , which know not how to negociate , nor haue any set rents , no receipts , nor Bils of exchange , nor know how to get a great deale of money into their hands ( compounding afterwards for a little ) paying backe a third part , and that slowly , ill , or neuer ; these poore rogues , I say , that neither haue the wit to inuent , nor the power to aspire to any great bootie , nor to vndertake great matters , are ( as infamous thieues ) sent to the Gallies , and sometimes hang'd , not for thieues ( for thieues are not hang'd ) but because they did not well know what did belong to their office , and were not their owne crafts-masters . And I will here by the way , tell thee what I heard of a Slaue , that was a Negro , entre boçaly ladino , one that was a nouice , and was better skil'd in his owne , then the Country language wherein he liu'd , being scarce perfect in either ; whic●… story will fall in here very fitly .

In Madrid , in the daies of my child-hood , where I resided some time , there were adulterers led to execution ; and although this sin be very common there , A short tale . and much vsed amongst them , yet it is seldome punished ; for there are neuer wanting good meanes , and good moneys ; by meanes whereof these kinde of crimes are well accommodated : but at this time , and with this womans husband , they could worke no good . A world of people went forth to see them , especially your women , insomuch that the streets , and the windowes were wholly taken vp with them , making great moane for that miserable and vnfortunate woman . Now when her husband had cut off her head , this Negro spake The sayin●… of a Negro . out aloud , and said ; O God , how many here doe behold this sad spectacle , who with a great deale of reason might haue the like measure !

We likewise , may very well say ; How many , are there now adaies , who condemne others to the gallowes , whereon they might better , and with more reason , be hang'd themselues . I wonder at nothing in this age , nor am I of that queazy stomacke , that any thing should offend mee ; I will dance to the sound of that Pipe , after which I see others dance ; let things last , as they may last ; and hold out as long as they can , and then there is an end of them ; like vnto spoones made of a crust of b●…ead , which wee haue no sooner supt vp our pottage with , but we send them presently packing the same way with the other . And since thou saist , that thou lou'st my company , & tak'st much contentment therein , and that thou lik'st so well of it , I hope , it shall neither bee hurtfull vnto thee , nor hard to brooke it . For I am so good a fellow , and of so ingenious a disposition , that I know how to value and make a true esteeme of those kindnesses which are done vnto mee ; the thankfull acknowledgement thereof , I shall referre to my actions , which in their due time , shall testifie , what I now professe . But because reward is the spurre , which puts vertue forward ; and the onely whetstone , that sets an edge on mens affections ; making them to goe on brauely and couragiously in all that they vndertake ; And that it argues a basenesse of minde , not to reward , when from thence some glory , or benefit may arise ; And that a man doth not cumply with his duty , when hee doth not take any paines for his liuing ; for to that end was he borne , and therewith is he to sustaine himselfe ; it is fit , and no more then what is iust , that euery man should haue a proportionable and equall gaine , according to the quality of his aduenture : And I am very well content to giue way hereunto , making this the first stone in this our building ; and will treat farther hereafter of that , which is to be ordered and set downe betweene vs , in these , or any other the like occasions , that shall offer them-selues vnto vs .

All that , which shall fall , or come vnto our hands , as well those fruits already fallen , as those that are to fall hereafter , shall be diuided into three equall parts ; Guzman purposes to prouide for a deare yeare , and showe how it may be done . of all which thou shalt haue one part for thee , and another for me , and the third shall g●…e for to defray the charges of auerige , for it wi●…l not be alwaies faire weather ; nor shall wee still saile before the wind ; nor make euermore a speedy voyage ; as it happens when men are becalmed at Sea ; and when we shall land and come ashore , it is not fit that we should want cloathes , and other necessaries , nor must we , if the enemy should set vpon vs , bee vn-prouided of munition to defend our selues , and offend him ; nor , should wee chance by some , storme or other accident , to bee cast vpon some shelfe or quick-sand , must wee lacke a boate to put out , wherein to saue our liues , though we lose our goods . This third part , we w●…ll still lay apart by it selfe , that shall be , as it were the Aerarium , and publike Tre●…surie , our common purse , for to supply and relieue our necessities . For , if we goe wisely and discreetly to worke , and be not rash and inconsiderate in our actions , seeing we want not vnderstanding , and haue some skill in nauigation , ( at least are both of vs good Coasters , ) I for my part will content my selfe with no lesse , then some good place of command in my Countrey , and such good store of wealth , that I may afterwards liue happily all the daies of my life . And all this will I bring about , before I be 〈◊〉 yeares elder . Be therefore of good courage , and take heart vnto thee , for thou shalt make the like purchase , wherewith thou maist returne with credit to Valençia . I would not haue thee busie thy selfe in base thefts , nor be none of those ●…eaking thieues , that steale Primers , Horne-bookes , and Ballads ; for from such kind of thefts , thou shalt reape no other profit , but infamie , and reproach . In a word , let vs brauely resolue , Morir ahorcados , ó comer contrompetas ; Either to Prouerbe . hang together for company , or to haue our dinners seru'd in with Trumpets . Let vs dye like dogges , or liue like men . For a mans life is ended in a day ; but pouerty , is a daily de●…th . And if we goe on as we haue begun , and vse these , and the like trickes , we shall with a little practice , grow to greater both cunning , and wealth , and bid a fart in Feares teeth ; For all moneths are alike , bee Prouerbe . they faire or foule , euery one hath c c Todo los meses de a treynta dias . his thirty dayes , and no more ; Euery man must liue out his time , how happily , or how miserably , I cannot say ; euery one must be content with his fortune : And for as much , as in the darke , all Cats d d A escuras to dos los gatos , negros . are blacke , and Ione is as faire as my Lady ; we will so carry things in the clouds , Prouerbe . that wee may not appeare in our right colours . Wee two will ioyne together , keepe counsell , and deale fairly one with another , diuiding the spoile equally , that there may be no falling out betweene vs : For , as it is in the Prouerbe ; Un lobo , a otro , nunca se muerde ; One Wolfe , will not bite another . Loe here , if thou wilt , thou shalt presently , before we goe any farther , haue a third part of what Prouerbe . is already got ; for it is not iust nor honest , to debarre any man of his right , or to with-hold that from him , which is his . Much good may it doe thee ; and thanke God , that with so fortunate a foot , and so propitious a starre , thou hast lighted thus happily into our company ; desiring him , that we may not fall into the hands of Pyrate●… , who haue an eye to nothing else , but to runne away with the meat , that others haue drest , to licke away the creame , that others haue laboured for ; and to skimme away all the fat from off the pottage , not leauing vs any 〈◊〉 that good is .

With t●…is kinde of language , and my liberall carriage , dealing thus kindly and boun●…lly with him , I went securing his person vnto me , that hee might not forsake me , b●…t st●…y , and liue with me . For if I should haue sought ouer all the world for a Mariner , I could not haue met with a better Mate for my Barke , nor one , that would so well haue suted for my purpose , as Sayavedra . Besides , he being my equall , and euery way as good a man as my selfe , was contented to b●…come my seruant , and to acknowledge me for his master , it being no small aduantage to haue the hand , in most games that you play at . He , vpon these good words of min●… , was so ouercome , that he rested no lesse contented , then conquered by me . And so falling , in our future discourse , from one thing to another , ( as men vse to doe when they talke vpon the way ) I hapt at last to aske him the cause , that mou'd him to rob me ? Sir ( said he ) though I would , yet I cannot now forbeare , to acquaint you with the whole course of my life , and truly and faithfully to deliuer vnto you euery particular passage thereof , as well for those fauours which I haue so liberally receiued already from your Free and plaine dealing , holds friends together . hands , as also for that it is well enough knowne to the world , and therefore requires no such secresie ; As likewise , for that with those with whom we keepe company , and are daily to conuerse and liue withall , plaine dealing must bee vsed , and all matters fairly laid open , without the concealing or hiding of any thing : For , not onely to our Confessors , our Lawyers , and our Physitians , are we to tell the truth , but to those also that are of our owne profession , birds of the same feather ; nor was this vertue euer yet wanting amongst vs , which is a powerfull meanes for the maintaining of friendship , and the faster wedging of one man vnto another . But that I may at length cumply with those many obligations , wherein I stand bound vnto you ; I shall giue you ( Sir ) to vnderstand , That I am of Valençia , borne of honest parents , ( whom report may one day make knowne vnto you ) for they ( God be praised ) are now both dead ; Sayavedra discourseth to Guzman of his course of life . onely , their fame liueth . We were two brothers , and both vnfortunate ; whether it were , because from children , conu●…rsing continually together , wee ran courses alike , and did in all things sort and sute each with other ; or whether it were , that suffering our selues to be carried away with the fury of our vaine appetites , without striuing to make due resistance , we did giue way to this temptation , by consenting thereunto , ( or to say more truly ) fell into this weaknesse , not thinking on those future dangers , that were to follow thereupon , but drawne along with those baytes , that for the present pleas'd our taste , being now inured , and accustomed thereunto , wee could not ( though wee would ) goe backe . My other brother , is somewhat elder then my selfe , and though both of vs were of a reasonable good capacitie , and had ( as they say ) our wits and iudgements about vs , and were not put ( as other men are ) to seeke for them , yet could not this vnderstanding of ours , put a bridle vpon our vnruly affections ; such is , or was the force of our malignant starre , and so great the power of our euill inclination , that we could not auoid it . In so much , that laying aside all respects of honor , and to apply our selues to any set course of life , more out of a desire to see strange Countries , then to get some honest meanes , whereby to liue , we went out into the wide world to seeke our fortunes . But because things might not chance to fall out so luckily with vs , as we did frame to our selues , and that if we should come in trouble , we might not be knowne , nor dishonor our house , we did agree betweene our selues , to change and alter our names .

My brother being a good Latinist , and a fine Scholler , fetcht his name , I know not from whence ; His owne name being Iuan Marti , of Iuan , hee made Luxan ; and of Marti , Mateo ; and turning it by inuerting the words , he cal'd himselfe Mateo Luxan . In this manner , did hee wander through the world ; and the world saith , that it gaue him the same payment , as it did mee . But I , for that I had no learning , and knew no more then a young Nouice in a Monasterie , I would not trouble my head with these curiosities , but going the downe right way to worke , and knowing that the Sayavedra's were of principall note , and ancient Gentlemen of Sevill , I styled my selfe to be of that City , and tooke their name vpon me . But I was neuer in Sevill , no●… know any more thereof , then what I haue said already .

Being thus new christned , we set forth both on one and the same day , and began our trauailes together , but went each of vs a seuerall way . Some haue told me , who knew him by sight , that they haue seene him in Castile , and in Andaluzia very hardly vsed ; and that from thence , he went to the Indyes , where it also went ill with him . I shap't my course another way ; for I got me to Barcelona , where in the Galleys I past ouer into Italy : I had spent all that , which I had brought along with me from home , and at last became exceeding poore . And because Necessitie , doth oftentimes ( as theys say ) driue a man to doe that , which he neuer dream't of , tost thus vp and downe , and cruelly encountred with hunger , I chanced in the end to arriue in the kingdome of Naples ; where , I had euer a desire to reside , for the great good which I had heard of that Citie .

I traueld all ouer that kingdome , spending that which I had not , till I came to be a notable Picaro , and began at length to conuerse with as a●…rant Rogues as my selfe ; and from one round to another I grew vp by degrees , to be a fine nimble-fingerd d d The Spanish p●…rase is ; Oficial de la carda . ●…or trasl●…çion dezimos carcar à vno , quando le dan alguna fraterna , y es tratado asperamentè Covarr . verb. Card●… . Fuller , I could teazell cloathes singular well , I could picke a pocket very neatly , and cut a purse handsomely , and doe many the like fine 〈◊〉 . I made my selfe a Camerade with those that were the Masters of our Company , and had recourse alwayes vnto them , that they might couer mee vnder their wing in time of aduersitie ; I was but their seruant , and one of those ordinary Souldiers as it were , that fought vnder their Ensigne . For my pouertie was so great , that I could neuer get me into a stocke to put me into cloathes , or to be able to set vp shop for my selfe . Nor was it an inability or insufficiency ●…n me , that I came no better forward in the world ; for there was not such a c●…nning sharker amongst them all , as I was ; my sheeres , would finde an edge , when theirs could not cut ; they were all bunglers to me ; I was able to haue ●…ead vn●…o them all those foure cursory Lectures of thieuing ; and those other two of cony-catching and cheating , which I read for my degree , when I proceeded Batcheler in that Art . For I was so well read in those roguish studies , and from the time that I first learn'd them , had them all so perfect at my fingers ends , that I was not to seeke of any one of them . I was that singular Saker , that excellent Ierfalcon , that neuer mist my prey , but tooke all that I flew at either in Citie or Countrey . No game came amisse to me . None of them vnderstood halfe so well as I , the Art in cutting of a purse ; nor to diue into a pocket , so deepe , as I could . I was dogge at it , and could dispatch my businesse in a trice . My eye , and my hand , went both together ; they were here and there , and euery where , with a prestò be gone . I was of all occupations ; a mariner , a miller , a baker , a scout , a crosse-biter , one of your vp-right men , a cheater , a cozener , a fox , that was full of craft and subtletie ; none of my standing , no nor six yeeres elder then I , but would strike sayle to me , and acknowledge himselfe as farre inferiour to me , as the fowle is to the Falcon.

But by reason of their ancient standing , and the reputation they had got in those former dunsicall times , they tyrannized and vsurped on the name of famous professors : These were the Caesars ; and we the poore rogues ; whom they sent abroad , from house to house , to scowre dishes , to cast an eye in euery corner , to make one excuse or other wheresoeuer we came ; demanding in one place , whether such a Gentleman were there or no ; and in another , whether they wanted a young youth , that was willing to serue them . Asking such a Gentlewoman , whether shee would buy a very fine paire of Twizes ; which but a little before , we had cut from another Gentlewomans girdle , and hauing new ground and whet them , and made them very neat and cleane , and fitted them with a new cace , and a new ribond , we sold them afterwards away for new ware . Sometimes , we would make show to goe into some house to make water , and if we found , that there was a stable there , or other by-roomes belonging vnto it , in thither would we goe , where we should meet with a horse-cloath , a curry-combe , a syve , or the horse-mans cloake ; and when we could not come to finger any thing else , we should euermore be sure of bridles , and collars , and stirrops , and the like kinde of tackling for their Mules and their Hackneys , and if by misfortune , any one should come in , and see vs there , loosing presently our cod-pisse point , we would quat vs downe in a corner of the stable , as if we had beene driuen in thither by necessitie to doe that seruice , which no body can doe for vs but our selues . And in case they should say vnto vs ( as now and then they would ) you rogue , you thiefe , what make you here ? We would then presently rise vp , and pulling vp our breeches to make them fast , and be gone , we would while we were a trussing , mildly make answer ; I pray Sir be not offended ; take heed to whom , and of what you speake ; for here is no such kinde of man , as you talke of , no thiefe , no rogue , but one that is true and honest , and meanes you no harme ; I was ouer-taken in the street , and forced to come in vpon meere necessitie , and therefore I hope you will hold me excused .

Some did beleeue vs , and some not , but how-soeuer we past well enough with it . Sometimes , we would presse farther in , and rummage as it were all the whole house , from one end to the other , till we found somewhat that we might finger , and carry away ; and if by chance we were spyde by any , we would come crowching vnto them with teares in our eyes , beseeching them for Gods sake , to giue vs an almes , being euen ready to starue for want of food . With these , and other the like cunning shifts , there was not so much as a nayle in any mans wall , which we did not keepe a reckning of , and tooke away when we saw our time . I was a pretty little wagg , slender of growth , rather leane then otherwise , very witty , full of inuention , and aboue all , as nimble , and light-footed as a Bucke . I alwayes laid wait in the day time , how and where I should compasse my exployts in the night , neuer imbroyling my selfe in any businesse at vnseasonable times , for the better auoyding of all suspition ; and taking little sleepe when I had any thing to set my selfe about . In the day time , wee did ( like good Christians ) visit Churches , goe to Masse , heare Sermons , frequent your Indulgences , Iubiles , Feasts , and Processions . Wee were present at your Play-houses , and Courts of Iustice , at all Executions , and all other publike meetings and assemblies , where there was any concurse of people , any pressing or thronging in the streets , striuing to be alwaies in the thickest of the croud , entring in and out amongst them , passing to and fro a thousand times . For euery bout afforded vs worke enough , making vpon euery returne a good and gainefull voyage . One while we brought away daggers , stolne from mens backs ; other-while handkerchers pickt out of their pockets ; purses , rosarios , twizes , iewels worne by women ; and such odde toyes , as your children weare about their necks . And when all fail'd , and that I could not make that purchase as I would , with my sheeres ( which I had euer ready in my hand ) looke where the best and fairest cloake was in all the companie , I did whip from behinde , or the one side of it ( if by chance it slipt off from his shoulders in the throng ) as much as would make three or foure payre of soles , or some such odd knack , or other . Wherein , besides the profit , I tooke exceeding great pleasure , in seeing these gallants afterwards looke like the picture of S. Martin , with little more then halfe a cloake ; which was a ridiculous thing to behold , and did often moue me to much laughter . And when they them-selues had found it out , they began to winde and turne it this way , and that way , putting the part offended , either vnder or ouer their arme , as would make best for the hiding of that blemish ; and the people when they once began to perceiue it , they straight way flockt about them , who blushing to see their garment cut short to their waste , discouering those parts which shame bids vs hide , they went flinching away , and got them home through by-lanes , and such places , as were least frequented .

And when this would not fadge with vs , we would cunningly steale to your silke , or cloath of gold hangings , for we neuer stood vpon termes of courtesie , or were more dainty with these , then the rest ; for the greater was the value of it , the greater was our gaine ; and from the lower part of these hangings , would we snip off a peece or two , according as occasion , or time , would giue vs leaue ; endeuouring euer to cut in the best and choisest place , and in the turning of a hand , we made thereof either womens bodies , mens a a Montera , is a cap made of stuffe with little or no brims , to weare for ease within doores●… your Clownes haue them of cloath . monteras , purses , pinpillowes , sleeues for little children , and a thousand other the like fidling things ; still ordering and husbanding it so , that we would not lose the least thread , but did alwayes contriue it in that manner , as might make best for that vse , whereunto we would put it .

By little and little , we came approaching neerer and neerer vnto the Citie , drawne thither vpon the fame and report , that there was a new Uice-Roy already come thither , or would be there very shortly . For at such solemne feasts as these , where there is running of Buls , bayting of Beares , and the like pastimes , besides your great Fayres and markets , we will not sticke , for a need , to come a hundred miles off , that we may be present at them . Our expence vpon the way , was alwayes very little ; for we still made our prouision , as we went along , and what we got in one place , that we spent in another , taking vp hens here , capons there , in such a village chickens , and such a doue-house pigeons , pigs , gammons of bacon , and any thing that was tame , and would come to hand , neuer escapt our hands , furnishing our selues with all other necessarie implements , that might serue for the conueniencie of our iourney , were it for our dyet , or our lodging . And as a man that desires to haue a good lodging in his Inne , must haue a care to come there before the Sunne be set : so in that short time which we had to spend vntill it were towards night , and that the houre was come , wherein we did vsually retire our selues , we did runne ouer all the open places about the Countrey , and if we found any breach in any wall of a house , we would prie what we could proule from thence , and seeke to make our entry ; Which that we might doe with the more conueniency , and lesser hazard of our persons , we would begin to beg an almes , saying ; That we were poore Students , and being driuen to great necessity , could not for want of meanes returne handsomely into our owne Countrey . Which we did not so much demand of them , to the end they should giue vs any thing , as thereby to seeke occasion to steale something from them , hauing an eye still towards the hen-roost , casting with our selues how we might dis-people that house of its pullen .

Besides , for your Innes , and your Farmers back-sides , I carried alwaies with me a good angle-rod with a strong hooke and line , baited with a crust of bread , or some sixe graines of wheate , to catch there-with whatsoeuer came in my way , and I seldome put in my rod , but I pluckt out a fish as long as mine arme . But when it fell out so vnfortunately with vs , that we could not get any booty , and that ( as it is in the Prouerbe ) Se caya lacasa ; the house was fallen dawne ; and that there was no victualls there to be found ; yet come the worst , that Prouerbe . could come , wee should be sure to meet with as good and fat a Calfe , as any man need to eate , the world could not afford better Veale . As soone as we came to Naples , at our first comming we draue for some few dayes , a very good trade , and made very quicke returnes , with a great deale of profit to our purses , and all things did succeed very well with vs ; we tooke great paines , and we reapt great gaines . I had put my selfe into such apparell , that my presence might promise the reputation of an honest man ; so that any man might very well be cozned by this Carde , ( this outside I meane of mine ) so faire did I colour for it . So that if the entrance which wee made , like to our juego de cannas , glittering in gold , and all kind of brauerie , had not through my lacke of patience receiued in the end a foile , I might haue continued there in very good fashion . But I had worke enough to doe , to saue my skinne , from being pluckt ouer my eares , and to keepe my bones from being broken . It was mine owne fault , that my egges prou'd addle , and were not so well hatcht as they might haue beene . I may thanke no body for it but my selfe . But God be thanked , that it was no worse with mee ; for I might haue receiu'd much more harme thereby , and therewith did I comfort my selfe .

One of my Camerades was of that Countrey , seruant to a Regent of t●… Collaterall Councell , whose father had also seru'd him heretofore , he was des●…ous to make himselfe knowne vnto him , whereupon hee went to kisse his hands , nor did his owne returne empty from him ; But ( being very glad to see him ) offered to doe him any kindnesse that lay in his power ; nor were they Courtiers words , sprinckled with holy-water , for he did as well doe , as say ; For seldome , and to few , doth it happen in Court , to eate together in one plate , and at one boord ; But when the minde is generous and noble , it euermore takes Noble minds are euer liberall . delight to giue ; and by so much the more is encreased , by how much the more we craue . For it hath alwaies beene a peculiar property belonging to giuing , to make the doner famous and renowned to the world . And the more subiects they light on to conferre such courtesies , so much the more glory doe they gaine vnto them-selues . Presently , without any more adoe , hee employ'd him in some businesses , and those of some worth and moment , and well deseruing a worthier subiect . Vnder his protection we went vp and downe the Citie , as if we had beene so many Vice-Kings of the Country , liuing without controlment , and no man daring to meddle with vs .

Being thus seated on the warme side of the hedge , presuming vpon his fauour and countenance , we did lash out a little too much , in vndertaking such and such things , as were beyond the reach of our braines , and would require stronger wits then we had any . He was the tongue , wherewith we spake ; he did direct vs , whither wee were to goe ; and what wee were to doe ; at what houres , we might with most safety be abroad ; where we might best make our entry ; whom we might best trust ; and of whom we had most reason to be afraid . For ( as we shall tell you hereafter ) they that commit the greatest robberies , and such thefts , as are more famous then any other , more cunningly carried , of a higher straine and nature then the rest , and of the greatest importance , are those that are nearest in their attendance about the Ministers of Iustice . For these men , feare nothing , they are in fauour with their Lord , necessity oppresseth Prouerbe . them , occasion is offred ; God blesse euery good man from such authenticall thieues , who thinke themselues authorized to steale , and that the Law either cannot , or will not , take hold of them .

I went one day a wrestling à braço e e Luchar a braço partido es proceder y gu almenté sin ventaja de vno à otro . Covarr . verb. Braço . partido ( as they say ) with my thoughts , that is to say , vpon equall tearmes , without any manner of aduantage of my fellowes , out of a desire that I had to seeke out something wherewithall to entertaine my selfe ; for it was almost high-noone , and wee had not yet threaded our needle , nor wrought one stitch o●… worke . And to come home empty handed , that I would not ; I scorn'd not to send in my prouision before-hand , as Prouerbe . holding it a great disgrace vnto me . For if my companions should chance to haue wrought their honey-combes , and that they were to bee found at home in the hiue , where we did all meete , if I should bring nothing in , b●…t feede vpon them store , they would vpbraid me therewith calling me idle Drone ; Titting and flo●…ting at me , that I should offer to sit downe at boord f f 〈◊〉 à senta●… à la mesa con sus manos lavad 〈◊〉 ●…zese d●…l qu●… no ●…a trabaj●…do como los demas , y à la hora de comer , no haviendo en zusiado sus manos , se viene con los demas à la mesa , y come de mogollon . Covarr . verb. Lavar . with cleane hand . M●…aning thereby , that I had not laboured for my liuing as the rest had done , no●… taken the paines to foule my hands , and yet must sit downe and eate at other mens cost . Holding him for a base minded fellow , that would come to a well furnisht table , and sit downe to dinner , not hauing before-hand prouided some prouision of his owne , whereon to feed . I had cast mine eye vpon a very faire house , which at the first sight seemed vnto mee , to belong to some honorable person , or principall Gentleman of that Citie . I entred as boldly into it , as if the house had beene mine owne . For ( as it is in the Prouerbe ) nunca el timido , fue buen cirujano ; The fearfull man , neuer makes good Surgeon . Which Prouerbe . kinde of Phrase , your old women in Spaine vse to their children , when they goe sneakingly and fearfully about any businesse . Anda , anda , que pareç●… que Prouerbe . vas a hurtar ; Get thee gone , get thee gone , thou goest logging and dreamingly about it , as if thou wentest a filching . So that alwayes , and in all places whatsoeuer , or wheresoeuer I came , me thought I went into mine owne house , or that I did enter as it were by authority , with the Uare of Iustice in my hand , or the whole power of the Country .

I lookt about on this side , and on that side , longing that mine eyes might Sayavedras stealing of a Kirtle . light one some-thing or other , that I might lay my hands on . At last it was my fortune to spy lying on the top of a little side-table , a faire blacke veluet Kirtle , richly embroydered , which would very well serue to make three seuerall sorts of garments , cassocke , and hose , and something else besides ; for there were full fifteene yards in it , and might very well beseeme the wearing of the neatest and brauest Gallants in the Kingdome . I stood looking and pee●…ng on euery side of me , if I might goe cleanly away with this booty , that it might not cost me the laying on , and escape without danger of being beaten for my labour ; and by good hap I did not meete with any to hinder me in this my purpose ; Whereupon I tooke it vp , and clapping it vnder mine arme , fetching two or three nimble friscals , my feete were presently vpon the threshold of the doore , making their way to goe forth into the streete : But I was no sooner come thither , but there I met full butt with the owner of the house , who was Master Datario * * Datario , a great office in Rome , as also in other places . , a man of great place and authority in that City , who seeing me come forth with this fardle vnder mine arme , asked mee what I was , what I made there , and what was that I carried away with me ? I being thus put to my shift , made a vertue of necessity , and was not long in consulting with my my selfe for an answere , and with an vntroubled , or rather cheerefull countenance , said vnto him ; Sir , it is my Mistresses pleasure , that I should vntucke these pleats a little , to make the folds fall a little handsomer , and that I should lessen it a thought in the waste , for that it sits not well before ; and hath giuen me in charge to dispatch it presently . Doe so I pray ( my friend ) quoth he , see it be done quickly , and let it be your owne hand-working , that it may not bee done amisse , and make all the haste you can . I then said to my selfe ; I haue done this with mine owne hand , and I will make quicke worke with the rest . And with that I hy'd me downe the street , fetching more turnings and windings then a Snake , sometimes this way , and sometimes that way , now here , and now there , and all , that they might not find any footing of mee , if hee should chance to vncouple his hounds , and send them after me to follow mee vpon hot sent .

Anon after ( as ill lucke would haue it ) hee came to know how the world went , for he was no sooner come into the house , but hee found it all in an vprore , some in the hall , some in the kitchen , some in one roome , and some in another , the maids of the house some vnbraced , some their haire about their eares , some with one sleeue off , and another on , some in one posture , and some in another , but all in a combustion , brauling and calling one to another , giue me the Kirtle , giue mee the Kirtle , where is the Kirtle , what is become of the Kirtle ? but the Kirtle appeares not : you tooke it from my mistresse , ( saies one ) I laid it here , ( sayes another ) I left it here , ( sayes a third . ) Then falls the Mistresse of the house a chiding , asking who came in , or out ? No body could tell of any ; Then ( quoth she ) it is likely , that some of the house must needs haue it , therefore looke it me out , and that quickly too , or else you shall soundly pay for it . There was such an out-cry , such exclamations , such a howling , such a bawling , and so hideous a noyse , as if the whole house had beene fallen to the ground ; in so much , that they could not one vnderstand another .

In this hurly-burly comes me in the Master of the house , acknowledging now the error , that he had committed , in letting me goe away in that fashion ; and going to pacifie his wife , he told her that a thiefe had got into the house , and carried away her Kirtle , recounting vnto her , what had passed betwixt him and my selfe , when he met me comming forth of doores . Hee presently made search after me , but I so bestir'd my stumps , that he could not then finde me out , hauing by this time both secured my person , and the Kirtle .

That night , I got me to the house of the great Constable , out of a desire that I had , to finish a peece of worke , which some few dayes before , I had drawne Sayavedras theft at the Constables house . out ; but my pen did so blur , that I did despaire at that time to come off cleanly with it , and though I had taken a great deale of paines that it might bee neatly and handsomely done , yet could I neuer compasse ( for want of a good opportunity ) to haue it fall out fairly and fitly as I would till now . Many Gentlemen , were there met together to play , who had ordinarily three or foure tables set ready for them , and a page or two appointed to sit vp , and attend vpon them , till they gaue ouer . Euery table had his silke carpet , and two siluer candlesticks ; I carried thither with me a couple that were counterfait , made of the purest Tinne I could get , and iust of the same fashion and proportion , and so like in euery respect , that you could not for their finenesse , distinguish them from the other , iumping so truly , as well in the colour , as the making , prouided of purpose , for the better effecting of what I intended . I carried likewise two candles along with me , and vsing close conueyance , that they might not be seene about me , I leaned against one of the corners of the wall , as I had vsed to doe heretofore , waiting for a faire occasion to bring my proiect to passe , giuing those that were there to vnderstand , that I was a seruant to one of those Gentlemen that were at play . Two , were playing at h h Cientos ; a witty game at Cards , much vsed in Spaine . çientos , at one of those tables , they call'd for lights , there was not any body there but one Page , and he so sleepy and so drousie , that hauing call'd vnto him twice , hee did neither answer them , nor well minde what they said vnto him : I made presently in to them , and hauing my candles and candlestickes in a readinesse , which were not long a lighting , throwing one end of my cloake ouer my shoulder , as if I had beene one of the seruants of the house : I shifted the candlesticks , putting the lights into those that I had brought with me , clapping those other of siluer vnder mine arme ; and so turning nimbly away from them , walking as Cats doe , softly and without any noyse , I got me quietly to my lodging , where I mixt them together with other peeces of plate , which I had in the like manner at diuers times gathered together ; And for to take away all occasions of quarrelling and wrangling , and that I might not be askt whether these are thine , or mine ? Let me see the marke ; Compare it with this or that other peece , and the difference will soone be decided ; How came you by it ? Where did you buy it ? What was he that sold it you ? To auoid these and the like cauills , I thought good to make sure worke with it ; so I melted it ( that it might not be knowne by its care-marke ) all into one masse , and putting it into a fine earthen pot , I carryed it to my Captaine , that he out of the authoritie and credit that hee had abroad , might the better sell it for me .

He did so ; and taking out a fifth part for himselfe , he gaue me the rest in very good Royals of plate , without defrauding me of one farthing , or the least haire of my head . It was an order amongst vs , that to him , as to our Chieftaine , we should bring all whatsoeuer we got , whereof the fifth part was his fee , which we truly and iustly paid vnto him , as a tribute that was as due to him , as that of the Indies , is to his Catholike Maiestie . No Prince in the world had more punctuall payment . And for this taxe , tallage , impost , or custome , ( or whatsoeuer in that kinde you shall be pleased to call it ) we were in all our dangers , protected and defended by him . Let no man thinke to chew his i i Mascar a dos carrillos . i. Hazerse à amba●… partes contrarias con dissimulaçion . Covarr . verb. Mascar . meat on Prouerbe . both sides of his chaps at once ; and to haue all the water runne through his owne mill , and none passe besides . For there is no dignitie in this life without a pension ; and nothing that a man enioyes of his estate , but he must part with some portion out of it . Euery one hath his double rowe of teeth , together with his grinders , all would faine eat . Euery poll , hath his polling . There are certaine rights and duties to be raised out of all things whatsoeuer . Imposts , and Interests , must passe to and fro in the world . One hand washeth k k Vna mano lava la otra , y entrambas la cara . another , Prouerbe . and both wash the face . If one giue me a Capon , it is fit I should bestow the brawne thereof vpon him . And there is no money can be better imployd , then vpon such a good Angell as this to guard vs . There are some kinde of people so cruell and vnconscionable , that they thinke of nothing but deceit and cozenage , Prouerbe . scooping like shouels all to themselues ; they will haue all the l l Quieren el pan , y las maseras . bread , and the meat too ; both a mans paines , and his profit ; leauing vs nothing but the periculum , and the poenam , the perill , and the punishment , if it be our misfortune to be caught . They will highly praise and commend vs , that they may incourage vs on to greater matters , as Pizarro did his people in the Indies . But when they giue vs most , and reward vs best , they thinke they doe vs a great fauour , if they giue vs the scraps and fragments , and what themselues know not well what to doe withall , reseruing the best and greatest part of the profit to themselues ; as Alexandro dealt with me . But afterwards , when they see vs in distresse , and that we haue need of their helpe , they will not so much as know vs ; they presently strike sayle , and will not stirre a foot to succour vs .

But we , and this our Milanese ( whom we made our Commander ) kept very good quarter ; for he would by no meanes haue any more of vs then a fifth part , which by agreement belonged vnto him . And if at any time , he hauing need of money , did intreat vs that we would lend him some , and put it to account to be paid out of his fifth part , as prizes came in ; when we had furnisht him , he would presently set it downe in his booke , with an Item so much due vnto such a one , to be paid out of my next Vales , and when that debt was satisfied , he would either crosse it , or write repayd in the margent ; so that there was euermore an euen reckning kept betweene vs . No , no , he was none of these shuffling companions , he was wonderfull honest in sharing the spoyle with vs , leuelling all accounts , and still keeping an euen reckning with vs ; and so as we had the fortune to make a good voyage , for the rest , we needed not to feare . My fellowes did not loyter but bestirred themselues lustily , and like good husbands , neuer came home with their hands in their m m Con las manos en el seno . bosomes , nor Prouerbe . dragg'd out an empty net .

We were foure of vs in the whole ; three aduenturers , to enter vpon all kinde of enterprizes , and one Captaine to fight in our defence . We would somtimes take him along with vs , & put him formost , to the end that if any one of vs should be taken napping , and the theft found about vs , he might serue to mitigate the matter , when we were thus taken in the manne●… , making vs to restore that which we had taken , ( that I may not say stolne away ) giuing vs two or three boxes on the care , and as many kicks on the breech , dismissing vs from thence in a diuels name , saying withall ; Get you gone , you rogue , be packing I say like an arrant rascall , and false thiefe as thou art , sirrha , let me see your backe , and I aduise you let me neuer heare or see , that you fall any more a filching , leaue your stealing , and liue honestly , else I sweare vnto thee by the faith of an honest man , I will cause thee to be whipt , or sent to the Galleys . Being thus curstly vsed by him , first kickt and beaten , and afterwards roundly rated , they that were present , taking him to be a good honest Gentleman , and a mercifull minded man , they were content to let vs goe , and so did we scape that storme by his meanes , whereas otherwise wee had beene ouertaken therewith .

But some againe , were such hard-hearted people , and of that stubborne and peruerse nature , that they did set vpon vs like fierce dragons , and were so full of rage and choller , that nothing could pacifie their wrath , but did still presse vs more and more , and nothing would content them , but our imprisonment , whipping , hanging , all was too little for vs . They would first see vs clapt vp safe , and afterwards talke with vs at leysure . To such rough-hewen natures , and boysterous dispositions , our Captaine would come to the parties , whom we had wronged , and tell them ; Doe not foyle your hands with such a filthy rogue as this is , giue him a hundred kicks , and let him goe like a villaine and thiefe as he is , but doe not cause him to be apprehended , you see he is a poore rascall , and if you commit him to prison , there will he starue , and be eaten vp with lice ; and what pleasure can you take in the destruction of such a ragged snake , who in himselfe is so wretched a soule already ? And with that , crying out ; Thou vngracious vnlucky villaine , they would giue vs such iobs , such pushes , such shocks , and iustlings , and thrust vs with that violence from them , that they would make vs to root vp the earth with our noses , and only thereby to free vs out of their hands , who had vs in hold .

But if any one should be so stiffe , and so hard laced , that nothing could moue him to pitie , nothing worke our inlargement , we vsed our best endeuour to get from them ; if that would not serue the turne , we would stand vpon our iustification , and not sticke ( and that stoutly too ) to tell this or that other to his teeth , tha●… he lyde in his throat , and tha●…●…e were as honest men as he , or the b●…st of them all : And whilest we were thus striuing to be gone , our Captaine Prouerbe . would interpose himselfe vnder colour of pacifying the matter , and would helpe to part vs , by his comming in betweene vs , and so free vs from out their clutches , and set vs at liberty . And if need were , ( when all this would not serue the turne ) hee did throw a n n Deromavan el poleo , sayes the Spanish phrase . Lat: pulegium . Eng. penny royall . Quae herba ex●…tat oues ad balatum . bone amongst them , and would seeke some occasion or other , prouoking them by words , to fall to blowes , quieting the lesser tumult by the greater , and so made a shift to scuffle away , and to dis-imbroyle our selues of this troublesome businesse .

At other times , when we were running away with that which we had stolne , and were hardly followed , euen close at the heeles of vs , one of our fellowes would come athwart him that pursued vs , and stepping our iust before him , would detaine him for a while , asking him what was the matter , and what troubled him , that he made such haste , who it was that had done him wrong , together with the nature of the iniurie , and so would not suffer him to passe on , as if he had desired to make peace , and to pacifie both parties . And albeit he would not giue him any answer , ( for that his businesse required haste ) yet were it more , or lesse , that he thus entertained the time with him , euery the least delay , were it neuer so little , was enough to make vs , to our great aduantage , gaine ground of him ; howbeit they that flie , haue alwayes the start of them that follow ; and feare , in such cases , doth euermore clap wings to our feet . Whereas they that runne after others , doe naturally grow quickly weary , & beat themselues out of breath , partly being stifled with the heat of passion , and partly out of the minde that they haue to doe another a shrewd turne , which doth much puzzell them , notwithstanding that they striue and labour all that they can to ouertake him : but it is impossible to striue against nature , which doth euer fauour those , that desire to saue themselues . Thus by one meanes or other , they were still detayned , and mist of their purpose .

Other-whiles , they would be bound for our forth-comming , giue their words for our truth and honestie , and though we had gone sheere away with that which we had stolne , they would plead our innocencie , especially , not being taken with the theft ; for by this time we had conuay'd it some three or foure streets of , where there was no more newes to be heard of it . So that by their good words , their intercessions , and their being bound for vs bodie for bodie , we were freed from that euill opinion , which before was conceiued of vs . So that by hooke , or by crooke , this way , or that way , one or another , we went through-stitch with our businesse , maugre all the world , or though spite should haue done her worst ; for we had still one tricke or other , when it came to a dead lift , wherewithall to serue our turne .

But once , being more carelesse , then I ought to haue beene , I would needs goe forrage alone by my selfe , without euer a skout to scoure the coast , and though I should haue taken one along with me , I perswade my selfe , as the case then stood with me , he would haue steaded me little , or nothing at all . And thus it was .

My sinnes ( for it could be nothing else ) had drawne me one day forth of Sayavedra's stealing of shirts . the Citie to walke abroad and take the ayre , and comming neere vnto a riuer side , where in a medow vpon the grasse were laid out a great many linnen cloathes a drying , and the woman that lookt vnto them , sitting close , to shade her-selfe from the heat of the Sunne , in a little hollow cleft of an old wall , that was not farre off ; me thought the linnen needed no more drying , and whether it did or no , it was all one to me , wet or dry , it made no great matter , either way ( so I might haue what I look't for ) would serue my turne well enough . I had a moneths minde , to folde vp two or three of the finest and newest shirts , that were there , thinking with my selfe , that they would sit well with my bodie , and so very easily and fairely I tooke them vp ; but fearing lest any body should come in the meane while , and spie what I was a doing , I lapt them vp in haste , not being willing to stay to folde them there , but to doe that at more leysure , when I came to my lodging . The good woman did not see what I did , for her backe was all this while towards me ; but there was not one wanting , who shrewdly complayning of me , not running ( to make me the more secure ) but walking a good round pace towards her , aduised her thereof .

This poore woman , when since heard how the world went , sets me out a throat , whose shrill sound did ascend as high as heauen . And leauing a little girle , that shee had there , to looke vnto the rest of the linnen , shee began to runne after me . So that I seeing my selfe in this strait , I dissembled the matter as well as I could , and without either turning my face towards her , or mending my pace , I walked soberly and demurely along , as if shee had nothing to doe with me ; letting ( as I went along ) my ware fall to the ground , going on still as I did before , without any perturbation of countenance , or inlarging of my steps ; thinking with my selfe , that when this wicked woman had recouered that which she lost , she would therewith haue been contended , and rested quiet : but shee did not leaue me so ; for if shee cryde out before , now shee made such a noyse , and sent forth such a loud clamour , that the whole field did ring of the peale , which that shrill clapper of hers made . And for that we were not farre from the Towne , nor in a solitarie place , that was free from company , the outcryes that shee made , were heard by many ; insomuch that great store of all sorts of people came running in , especially boyes and little children , besides a great number of dogs , barking and bawling , as if they had beene mad , comming about me as thicke as bees ; being confounded , and ready almost to haue runne out of my wits with that tumultuous hurry , and horrible stirre they made . And some young lads , which fell in with these lesser beagles , to make the cry the fuller , when they vnderstood of the businesse , were ready to swallow me vp aliue , from whose power ( so violently were they bent against me ) it was impossible for me to scape . From that day forward , I began to stand in feare of this little frye , which heretofore I was neuer afraid of . These little minowes , were they , that by persecuting of me , did vndoe me .

When I heard Sayavedra say so , there presently came into my minde a famous drunkard in Madrid , who being kickt and spurn'd , and mightily abused A short tale of a drunkard . by the Boyes that had got about him ; when hee came to the end of the street , hee stoopes mee downe and takes vp a couple of stones , and holding one in the one hand , and the other in the other , leaning himselfe against a wall , hee said thus vnto them : No more , no more ( my good Boyes ) it is enough ; stay here , stay here ( sweet Children ) for it is not fit you should goe any farther . And therefore ( my pretty hearts ) let mee intreat you to goe backe , and not trouble mee , or your selues any longer : for I am very well satisfied with those courtesies I haue already receiued from you ; for the which I kindly thanke you . Otherwise , I haue nothing to returne you in requitall , but these stones , which I shall freely bestow vpon you , though it cost mee the laying on ; so that some of you , I beleeue , will be better paid for your paines then you expect . Wherevpon they seeing him thus resolute , they sneakt away one by one , and let the poore man alone , who afterward went quietly along about his busines . If Sayavedra had taken the like course , he might peraduenture haue had the like successe .

But he , continuing his discourse went on and said ; surely where this rude rabble once bands and lincks it selfe together , no good man can doe ought that is good , nor any honest man passe in quiet for them . I sought now to flye from them , as a man would fly from the gallowes : and I was in a good way towards it , and wanted little of comming thither . For , by seeking to flye from their hands I fell into those of the Iustice ; who had now caught me in their net , whence there was no hope to scape .

When I saw this misfortune was fallen vpon me : I made no more adoe , but sent presently to my Captaine , aduising him how the case stood with me , who as soone as hee vnderstood of it , made all the haste he could vnto mee , was with me ( as they say ) ere a man could say this ; and well instructed mee what I should both say and doe . T●…at done , hee went to the Notarie , telling him that hee knew mee to bee well descended , that I was honourably borne both by Father and Mother , and of as ancient and noble a House as any was in Spaine : and that it was not possible , nor was it to bee beleeu'd , that such a Gentleman as I was , would commit so foule a fact .

But say ( which cannot sinke into my head ) that it should be true , it is not a thing so much to be wondred at ; for that he might either doe it out of youthfulnesse ( which is incident now and then to play such kinde of idle prankes ) or out of want , lacking money , and being loath to begge or borrow , or forced thereunto out of pure hunger ; and therefore chose rather to hazard than famish his person . Besides , it is a matter of no moment , a toy , a trifle , a thing not to be made any reckoning of , as well in regard of its small value , as also in respect of the Gentlemans qualitie , and the noblenesse of his house . What with these good words and something else that he did besides , within some two houres after I was freed out of Prison : and ( had God beene pleased so to haue it ) I could haue wisht I might not haue come out then , nor three houres after that ; nay , not till darke night : but since it was his good will and pleasure that it should succeed as it did with me , blessed bee his name for euer , good or ill must be welcome from his hand . Sinne , that Catchpole of Conscience , that churlish Porter that keepes account of our actions , and has an eye to what wee doe , who had still persecuted me at the very thresholds of the dores wherinto I entred , was not vnmindful to do the like by me in that of the Prison , when I was rea●…y to come out : for euen as I was putting my foote ouer the threshold , who should I meet full butte , but Maister Datario ? who came thither to free a Prisoner .

As soone as hee saw mee , hee presently knew mee , and withall pusht me so violently backe , that I fell flat vpon my backe to the ground ; and then comming fiercely vpon mee that hee might hold me , while hee had me at this aduantage , and calling to the Keeper , committed me anew , and followed the accusation so hard against me , that neither intreaties nor any offers to make him satisfaction for his kirtle , were able to make him to surcease his sute . Hee was a powerfull man , I vsed all possible diligences : but neither did my pleading that I was a Gentleman , nor the tendernesse of my yeares , preuaile so farre , as to bring mee fairely off . And , as if they had done me a deed of charity , and bestowed an almes on mee , by way of trans-action and agreement , as if they had shewed mee all the fauour in the world , they gaue mee such a heauy sentence that I shall neuer forget it while I liue . I went for shirts , and they stript mee of mine from my shoulder to my waste , banishing mee from thence for euer . I had my payment , but the blockhead had not his Kirtle : see how a wilfull foole , such a one as this was , stood in his owne light ; being more willing to doe me a mischiefe then himselfe a pleasure ; and to lose his goods , rather then to let mee loose : which hee might easily haue recouered of me , if he would haue suffered mee to stay in that City .

Well , I was forced to forgoe Naples , and with it , all my old friends and acquaintance : I packt vp all my trinkets together , and that poore pittance that Prouerbe . I had pickt vp by mine owne industry , and departed from thence , wandring vp and downe Italy , till I came to Bologna , where Alessandro receiued me into his seruice : who did vsually go out of that City , to fetch in some booty or other ; and hauing sped well hee returned home in safety . When wee were in Rome , and came in vnto you , when you were in that thrust and throng of people , we did not so much intend your good , as expect that some farther quarrell would haue growneth reupon , wherby wee might with the more safety haue got some Cloakes or Hats : but that occasion being taken away , missing thus of our purpose , wee began to plot how wee might commit this theft , making me ( as their ●…anner was ) o o Cabeça de Lobo . That is , the occasion that a man takes to benefit himselfe . As he that kils a Wolfe , and carries the head to the Villages thereabout , receiuing something of euery one by way of gratification , for the good ●…ee hath done in killing so dangerous and hurtfull a Beast . Couarr . Verb. Cabeça . Cabeça de Lobo , the Wolfes head , the instrument of their profit ; whilst they kept their owne fingers out of the fire , and would be sure to be out of the danger of Gun-shot . This Story was he telling me , when wee were now come to our iournies end . And so ceasing to talke any farther of it , we came into our Inne , where we presently had that prouided for vs which was fitting for trauellers that were not to make any long stay .

CHAP. VI.

Sayavedra meets in Milan with a friend of his that seru'd a Merchant ; Guzman de Alfarache layes a witty plot how to rob him .

WIth a great deale of attention and admiration , had Sayavedra all this iourney tyed mine eares to his tongue . And during the rest of the way , till wee reacht to Milan , wee were neuer out of matter ; but kept the ball still vp ; hee tossing one tale to me , and I returning another to him : so that our Discourse neuer made a fault ; but was ( being both good Players ) well maintaind and kept vp betweene vs . But I had a great contradiction in my selfe , and could hardly bee brought to beleeue that men of noble birth , Sonnes of such worthy Parents , should suffer themselues to bee thus violently haled by their Passions ; that , forgetting the respect due to their bloud and Gentry , ( the remembrance whereof should cause them to goe on in an honourable and ciuill course of life ) doe notwithstanding commit base and infamous actions , by robbing others of their goods and honours : for in very truth , hee Monie make : man to bee esteemed . Men sooner see other mens faults then their owne . The sweetnesse and sowrenesse of warre . that lofeth his wealth , loseth both the one and the other ; for euery man is so farre forth esteemed and honoured , as hee is rich and wealthy . Whereupon I said secretly to my selfe ; surely if Sayavedras father left him so rich as hee himselfe reporteth hee did , how comes it ( quoth I ) to passe , that hee is turned thiefe ? and that hee takes more pleasure to follow this lewd kinde of life , and to endure these shamefull affronts , then to liue in esteeme and reputation in his owne Countrey ? If wee doe ill , wee therefore doe it because it carries a faire appearance with it , and shewes vnto vs a certaine shadow , or a kinde of resemblance of some goodnesse or other ; but in suffering such indignities as hee hath done , there is no hope thereof , no colour at all for it . But I presently recall'd this rash censure , and sodainly taking vp my selfe , I fell to excusing of him , and began vpon better deliberation to say with my selfe ; It may bee hee went from home being a childe as I did . And so , considering the relation that hee had made vnto mee , mine owne proper steppes represented themselues vnto mee , and those lewd courses that my selfe had runne . But I afterwards came againe to my selfe and said : But suppose all this to bee true which hee hath said : Why did hee not turne ouer a new leafe when hee had the vse of reason , and came to bee a man , taking vpon him the profession of a Souldier ? He might answere likewise for himselfe and say ; Why did not I so to ? I see a more in another mans eye , and cannot behold the beame that is in mine owne .

Military Profession is a pleasing thing , and hath many motiues to draw a mans affection thereunto . They haue good pay , they passe well enough with it ; it teacheth a man hardnesse , it maketh him to forget his dainty fare at home , and boldly to aduenture his life to winne honour , and to doe his Countrey seruice . But they pay dearly for it , they haue too hard a bargaine of i●… , it is a kinde of taking vp of money at extreame rates , and excessiue interest , for to satisfie a debt of lesser value . They must serue long before they can come to any thing , rise betimes in the morning , watch all night , haue his shoulders pincht with the heauy weight of a Musquet , stand Centinell for the space of full foure houres , and two at the least , when hee is a a Dixese Centinela , à Sc●…tillando . Porque ha de estar con los ojos a●…ieros , y viuos , como çentellas . Otros dizen , que esta corrompido el vocablo de çentinela , à sentiendo . Por la viueza que ha de teneren todos los sentidos ; especialmentè en la vista , y ●…loydo . Centinela perdida , is hee that is put out of a Castle , 〈◊〉 out of 〈◊〉 Campe into the open field , where in case of necessity , be cannot bee conueniently relieued : and so be must stand to his aduenture . The French stile him , Centinelle perduë . Covarr . Verb. Centinel●… . Centinela perdida , without budging or mouing but a foote from that place where they haue once set him : let it raine , thunder or lighten neuer so fast ; freze , snow , or blow the windes neuer so hard , let the weather be as sharpe as sharpe may be , all is one , he must stand to his tackling . And when hee hath done all this , like a souldier and a braue fellow , when hee shall returne home safe to his lodging ( not reckoning those that miscarry by this meanes ) hee hath not so much as a Candle to light him to bed , nor fire to dry either his wet or frozen carcasse , nor bread to put in his mouth , nor wine to wash downe those crummes , being hunger-staru'd , all mire and dirt , all to bee rent and torne , but not a ragge of comfort . And therefore considering the hard life that a Souldier leades , and how ill they are rewarded , hazarding their owne liues to saue other mens , I doe not much blame Sayavedra that hee did not turne Souldier .

But for his elder Brother , Sennor Iuan Marti , or Mateo Luxan ( leauing him to make choyce of one of the two , as shall stand best with his Worships liking ) who was of age sufficient , when his father died , for to discerne betwixt ill and good , who had a good house to put his head in , and good meanes to maintaine it , and to haue liu'd richly and plentifully , and in good reputation and credit in his owne Country , what a Diuell mou'd him , or what hellish temptation came into his minde , to neglect his owne busines , and so foolishly thrust himselfe to intermeddle in other folkes matters , and to fall at last to stealing of cloakes . How much better would it haue beene for him to haue employd his person in some honourable entertainment or other ? Hee was a good Gramarian , hee had studied the Lawes , and might ( if hee would himselfe ) haue easily come to be a Doctor .

But happely , these and the like doe thinke , That there needs no more to make a thiefe , then to say ; I will be a thiefe . And that all shall succeed as happily with them , as themselues could wish it . But in good sooth , I must beate them out of this errour , and plainly tell them ; That there is more in it , then Thieuing is a trade , that is full of trouble . so . That it will cost them no small labour , and withall they must incurre a great deale of danger . Besides , I cannot well tell you , whether or no , there be so many rules amongst the Lawyers , as he needs to haue , who meanes to proue a good thiefe indeed . For say , that there be two in a Towne , that emulate one another , and contend for the victorie , and that the one after a great deale of strife , and stiffe standing out , will at last concurre with the other , who hath gotten him the name and fame of all that perfection that belongs to your b b Termes of Art amongst theeues and rogues . Germania , elaccento en la penultima , es el lenguage de la rufianesca ; dicho assi ; ò porque no los entendemos , ò por la hermandad que entre sitienen . A canting kind of language . Also taken for a fraternitie , or brotherhood amongst theeues . Covarr . verb. Germania . A tale of a Country Alcalde . Cocoquismo , and Germania , the true Art of filching and stealing , and hath show'd himselfe an excellent Proficient in that Science , I can assure you , on my credit , hee had need carry a close hand , and looke narrowly to his businesse . For , to my seeming , if that be true , ( as I thinke it was ) which Sayavedra deliuered vnto me ; he was a poore vnfortunate pilchard , a kind of shotten Herring ; and I , in comparison of him , a great goodly Wha●…e . Yet for all this , did not I dare , ( fearing I should proue my selfe a dunce , when I came to be examined by the masters of that faculty ) to stand for my grace , nor pretend the Cap and Hood , as doubting , how I should be able to answer for my degree , if I were well canuast by those that should oppose me . Sayavedra , and his brother ( doubtlesse ) did flatter themselues , and were truly perswaded , that with these poore dry petty thefts , ill seasoned , without any good taste , sweet sauour , or any the least pleasant relish in the world , they might boldly goe into the Schooles , and there reade in the c c The Spanish word is ; Catedra de prima . Valetanto , como silla pu●…sta en alto , qual es la de los Maestros que leen ; con obligaçion de leer à tiempo senalado , &c. Covarr . verb. Catedra . Regis professor his chaire , their solemne Lectures for their Doctorship . They did happely thinke with them-selues , that there was no more in it , then what a good plaine Country-fellow said , that was a kinde of poore silly Alcalde , in a little Village , called d d Almonaçi de Curita , is seated betwixt 〈◊〉 , and Zorita . It is an Arabicke word corrupted , of Almunasi , which signifies a place of obliuion : seeming to haue its root , from the Hebrew word nasas , obliuisci . And in that Towne there is wine of that strength and goodnesse , that Trauellers set their iourneyes so , as they may lodge there at night , where some of them forget themselues , like Vlysses souldiers , before they get thence . Otros dizen , que vale tanto como , hu●…rta del Rey. Vid. Covarr . pag. 56. Almonaçide Curita , in the kingdome of Toledo , who hauing made a watring place for the towne Cattle to drinke at , when he had finisht it , and made it handsome , hauing fitted it with cesternes , and whatsoeuer else hee in his wisedome held to be necessary , hee call'd the wisedome of the towne together , the whole body of the Councell , where in their presence , he caus'd the conduit pipes to be opened , and to let out the water , that they might giue their iudgement and opinion , how they lik't of it ? One said , the trough stood too high ; another , too low . The Alcalde , seeing his worke found fault withall , was not halfe well pleased with it , but scorning to be dasht out of countenance , and ouer-borne by his inferiours , he steps himselfe to the trough , and there his worship drinkes : And when hee had done , stepping backeward about some two strides , or thereabouts , looking angerly , yet grauely enough vpon them , he first spits , then wipes his mouth , and lastly sayes vnto them ; Gods nigs , ( my masters ) you need not find such fault with it , there is no more to be said in this matter : for being that I can make a shift to drinke at it , there is neuer a beast but may do the like , if he haue a minde to drinke .

Euen iust so is it with your young thieues that are fresh-water-Souldiers , and not well beaten to the businesse , who thinke all things easie , that they take in hand , and when they heare of such a famous thiefe , and that he hath done wonders in that kinde , will not sticke to say ; Tush , this is nothing : We can doe as much as this , and more too . But I promise you on my honest word , that such as these , who haue so good a conceit of them-selues , that may bee said of them : which another Country fellow , not farre from thence , dwelling in A tale of three country fellowes . Mancha , said to two other fellowes , who earnestly contended about the foale of a Mare ; One said , it was a Horse ; No , said the other , it is a Mule : Then a third person , that was in their company , drawing neerer and neerer , and rounding about the beast , and viewing , and viewing him againe , after hee had throughly marked his musle , and his eares , hee cryes out aloud ; Gods-bores , what a deale of doe is here about nothing ? You are a couple of coxe-combes both of you ; for I can assure you , this is as very an Asse , as my father . He that will boast himselfe to be a thiefe , and desires to bee listed in the rolle of those that haue gotten greatest fame , let him endeuour to doe things brauely , let him be an honourable thiefe , and not of that basenesse of minde , as to stoope so low , as to rob an hearbe-wifes shop of a rope of onions , or Tops and Gigs , and such other toyes as little children vse to play withall , which serue but from hand to mouth , to feed other thieues withall ; who will vse thee no otherwise , then men doe their slaues : you must pay them daily tribute , or else you must be packing ; they will not care a pin for you . And yet for these petty thefts ( though thou thinkst to scape with them , as things of nothing , ) they may chance to chaine thee to the gallies , if not halter thee at the gallowes . A man should not ( me thinkes ) so much vnder-value his owne worth , as to prostitute his life to danger , and to lay open his shoulders to shame , for bables and trifles ; nor , is it fit , that for so little , a man should pay so much . That a man should bee such a foole , as to indanger his necke for a Kirtle , or a couple of shirts ) Quien ca●…isas hurta , e e There is also ( which the Iutice bestowes on rogues ) jubon de açotes : porque se los ajustan alas espaldas . Covarr . 492. jubon espera ; He that steales a shirt , liues in hope to haue a doublet too . Let such a white-liuerd-whoreson , doe that , which that valiant Captaine Capin Uitelo aduiseth ; f f Prouerbe . Elmercader , que su trato no entiende , çierre la tienda ; That Merchant , that vnderstands not his trade , let him shut vp his shop .

But to let these thieues alone , and to come home to my selfe ; what could I now doe , if I should come to be put to it ? What 's become of all my cunning thefts ? I doubt me , I should be to seeke , how , where , and which way to begin . The Art of it , is gone from me , but not the feare . Euery thing hath its course , and its time , it is now a great while agoe since I finger'd my fleame or lancent , or that I did let any man blood , my hand is nothing so nimble as it was , it is growne slow and dull , and knowes not well where to pricke the veine . Beleeue it , There is no such Master as Practice . Vse , and exercise , are excellent things , Practice , a great matter . to keepe the hand in vre : Which when it is wanting , the vnderstanding gathers mosse , waxeth mouldy , and growes rusty .

When we were come to Milan , we kept vacation for three or foure dayes . Guzman comes to Milan . For I durst not as yet aduenture to play . I was loath to haue any thing to doe with your men of warre , for they alwayes play very warily . Your Souldiers are subtile cunning gamesters , and aboue all , beare a most malitious minde against a mans money . They are neuer quiet , till they haue it . All , or the most part of them , would seeke to play vpon some one aduantage or other . I could not make vse of my trickes , nor would they permit me to put them vpon them , yet I must , whether I would or no , be forced to giue way to theirs . Besides , of them I was sure to get but little , but might be in election to lose much . I was not minded to doe any thing there , saue onely to round the City , to see what a manner of thing it was , what their trafficke , and such other greatnesses as it should afford our sight , and so afterwards to bid it farewell . And being thus resolued , I went to walke all that day from shop to shop , where I saw so many curiosities that I was taken with great admiration in the beholding of them , as also in the great trade , that was there driuen , euen in lesser things , that were of meaner value .

Standing one day in the midst of the Market-place , there came to Sayavedra , a handsome young youth , honestly clad , and well behau'd , and both in his garbe and fashion , a very fine Spaniard . But because his backe was towards me , I could not then discerne , nor vnderstand more of him , but that they went a little a side off from me , where alone by them-selues , they entertained talke a good while : which put me in a great muse , thinking with my selfe , what might be the cause , that these two should treat together with that secresie , not hauing ( as I did imagine with my selfe ) euer seene one another before . Notwithstanding , that I might not breake off their discourse , to the end that I might see whither it tended , I stood still , and did not moue from the place wherein I was , hauing still an eye , lest they should get out of my sight , obseruing their proceedings , and that if they should chance to go towards my lodging , I might ( taking the start of them , ) be there before them . And euer and anon , mine eye was vpon them , but yet kept me still where I was , to the end that they likewise might not shift a foot , and so slip from me .

For , I did consider with my selfe ; if I should now call him vnto mee , and aske him , what it was they talked of , Sayavedra might take occasion to make what excuse he list himselfe , and might make me this answer ; that by reason of my calling him away , they had not finished their discourse , nor as yet entertained talke to any purpose . Whereupon , for my better satisfaction , I thought it my best course , to continue there a little longer , and to leaue them a large field , wherein to expatiate their minds , for I had no such earnest businesse elsewhere , as might presse me to be gone . Now when it was almost dinner-time , this young youth tooke his leaue , and went about his businesse ; And I was likewise willing to doe the like ; for all this while I was wonderfull iealous , and had a strong suspition , that they had plotted together to put a tricke vpon me . And Sayavedra , not saying a word to me , nor I to him , my feare was thereby the more increased , and began more and more to doubt what their drift might be . Watching him with no lesse care then a Cat would watch a Mouse . For Suspition , is a shrewd worme , which lies still gnawing at the heart ; nor is The nature of suspition and iealousie . it to be held a vice , when it setles it selfe vpon a vicious man . For , accordingly as the natures and conditions of men are , so haue we reason to be more , or lesse suspitious : Fearing euery man so farre forth , as his fashion and carriage may occasion this feare . But for as much as the desire that we haue after this , or that other thing , makes vs to rush violently on , & break through the bars of all difficulties whatsoeuer , although I would faine haue held peace , and did striue all that I could to keepe in this tongue of mine , yet could I hold no longer , ( no though my life had layen vpon it ) but I must needs aske him ; who that young man was , and what might be the subiect of this their long discourse ? yet did I for beare for the present , making no words thereof till I had dined , and then taking my time , calling Sayavedra vnto me , I said thus vnto him ; That young man , that was with you this morning , me thinks I haue ( if I be not much mistaken ) seene him heretofore in Rome . Is not his name Mendoça ?

No Sir , ( said Sayavedra ) his name is Aguilera ; nor hath he his name for Aguilera , a famous theefe . nought : for he is an Eagle that will flie at any thing , nothing comes amisse to him , he is still ready vpon all occasions . He is a good fellow , and a fine companion ; he is likewise a brother of the Companie , and such a one , as none of them all can out-strip him , he hath more tricks then a hundred of them , there is more resort to his Lectures , then to all the other Readers beside , put them all together .

O , this Aguilera hath tickling tallons , and what he once seazes on , is sure his owne , he goes sheere away with it , and t is neuer heard of any more . He hath a quicke apprehension , a nimble wit , a strong braine , a sound iudgement , he is an excellent pen-man , and such an Accomptant , either for the keeping of a Merchants booke , or summing vp of any recknings whatsoeuer , that I know not his fellow . We haue knowne one another these many yeeres , we haue trauayled together , and endured many particular troubles , and perils . And now he hath beene at me , to put me vpon one , which may turne to our exceeding either great good , or hurt , it being with vs , as with those that goe to Sea , either a happy voyage , or a miserable ship-wracke . For he that will goe to Sea , must resolue before-hand to encounter with dangers ; especially , being that betweene our death , and our life , there is no more then the springing of a planke , or the slipping of a cord .

He gaue me an account , how he came to this Citie , with a purpose to seeke out as well as he could some meanes whereby to liue . But , because he would not ingulphe himselfe , before he had first sounded the water , and that he might not within two dayes after his arriuall , be taken vp for a vagabond , or some masterlesse-hound , he had by good hap lighted vpon an entertaynment , which might quit cost without suspition ; for he had now placed himselfe with a Merchant of this Citie , who had receiued him into his seruice for the goodnesse of his hand , and hath seru'd him now a yeere , and somewhat more very faithfully and truly , looking when he might play the iade with him , and giue him a sound kicke with his heeles , and get safe away from him , as your Mules vse to doe , when they once come to be seuen yeere old ; who kicke at those , that haue kept them .

He farther told me , that we should lay our heads together , and draw one or two good fellowes into our companie , and ioyne together , to knead such a cake , and to make vs such a swinging pastie , that we might feed our fills , and free our selues from this poore and miserable kinde of life , wherein now we liue . But I was loath to hearken thereunto , holding it not so conuenient , for two respects .

First , because I found my selfe already so well fitted to my minde , that I did not desire to leade any better life , then that I now did with you : And secondly , for that a great deale of consideration is to be required , before a man leap●… out of one course of life into another . A little ( I knew ) could not content vs ; and to carry away much , it was impossible , wanting conueniencie of meanes to doe it . Here , we could not hide our selues out of the way , or keepe our selues secret aboue foure dayes ; nor could we secure our selues by flight , but that we should be taken , before we had gone foure steps out of Towne , so that we should either leaue our necks there longer then the marke , or our persons so rack't and so tortur'd , that they would neuer after be vsefull vnto vs . We gaue , and tooke ; he argued , I answered : In conclusion , he prest me hard vnto it ; but I stood off ; so that we did not ioyne issue , and all that had past betweene vs , was to no purpose . Many designes , many deuices were tost to and fro betweene vs ; but I did not like of any one of his propositions . For when the conclusion does not handsomly follow , the meanes thereunto are impertinent , and the grounds naught . So for that time he left me , because his houre was come , that he must hye him home ; nor would he willingly be wanting , when his master should haue occasion to vse him . Hastning perhaps his departure the sooner , because he saw he could doe no good vpon me , and that all our talke was to no end in the world .

This , that Sayavedra had told me , did neither secure my suspition , nor worke an absolute vnbeleefe in me , because I thought with my selfe , it was not a thing vnlikely . I call'd for my cloake , and out of doores we went , with a purpose to walke abroad into the fields to recreate our selues . And albeit , the most part of that euening , we talk't of other things ; this feare , was neuer out of my head , but where-soeuer I went , or what-soeuer I did , I was still thinking vpon it , and it would neuer out of my minde ; deuising with my selfe , whether I were best to beleeue him , or no ; or whether trusting to his honestie , and depending on the profession of his loue vnto me , he might play the Iacke with me , and strike me , like a f f The Spanish phrase is : y me diesse vn cabe , que passasse la raya . Cabe en el juego de la argolla , es la distançia que ay de vna , à otro bola , que para serlo , porlo menos ha decaber en medio la paleta , sin tocar aninguna de los dos , y de ayui tomo el nombre : y cabe de paleta es cl que esta tan junto , que de vna bola à otra , no aymas tierra ò suelo , del que puede tomar la paleta tendida en medio , y errarle , es de ruynes jugad●…res . y paraser cabe , ha de hazer que la bola de 〈◊〉 contrario , tocada con el golp●… de la suya , passe de la raya del juego , y vale dos piedras , ò pedradas . This Argolla , is an ordinarie play in Spaine . Co●…arr . verb. Cabe . 161. shouell-boord peece ( being now a ledger ) into the box , and himselfe remaine vpon the boord in my place . And if he should thus play the box with me , of whom should I complaine , but mine owne folly ? or whom can I iustly blame but my selfe ? A man may beare with one slippery tricke that is playd him , and if he pocket it with silence , or otherwise dissemble it , he may very well be excused ; but to be cozened twice one after another , and by one and the same party , he deserues to haue the Asses saddle clapt on his backe . What assurance can I haue from this man , or how may I dare to trust him , since , ( as it is in the prouerbe ) nunca buena vigase ●…izo de buen cohombro ; g g Tortusque per her●… , Cresceret in ventr●… cucumis . Virgil. 4. Georg. a crooked Cucumber , neuer made straight rafter . He that is naturally giuen to knauish tricks , will hardly , or neuer leaue them . And were not this a fine one aboue the rest , that he should put a full stoccado vpon me , and goe brag when he had done , that he had beaten a master of defence at his owne weapon ? Did I not deserue to be laught at , if I should suffer him to carry away the bucklers from me in this fashion ? But as mine h h Si●…e tune los ojos ●…n la puerta . eye was neuer off from the doore ; so my i i N●… me falt●… l●…s m●… de la ru●…a . Gu●… falls 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 the r●…bbing of the 〈◊〉 of Milan . hand was still vpon my distaffe . I was now become another Argos in mine owne businesse ; and another Ulysses , to looke to his water . Plotting with my selfe , how ( if that were true , which he told me ) I might helpe them to come off safely and cleanely with this businesse , in case it might be a matter of some moment and consideration , and that I might be sure it would free them from beggery , and make them for euer after to liue like men . For , to bestow a great deale of cost vpon that , which will yeeld but little profit , were foolishnesse , if not meere madnesse . There is no thrift , no good husbandry in it . The imploying of our paines , and our purse , ought to be answerable to the gaines and profits , that will come of it . For a man to limbeck his braines , a whole , nay , many nights , for Moone-shine in the water , or such a poore commoditie , as will scarce pay for a meales meat , is such a foolery , as no wise man will trouble his head Prouerbe . about it . But because it might haply proue a rich voyage , and might haply speed better then we were aware of , when we had done walking , and were now come home to supper , seeing Sayavedra looke somewhat sad and heauy , Prouerbe . as if something did trouble him , I said vnto him ; Methinks ( Sayavedra ) thou robbest thy selfe of thy mirth , because thou canst not rob others of their money . This Merchants great wealth , doth greatly disquiet thee . Is that which thou musest vpon ( for I see thou art in a browne studie ) some rare plot , one of Archimedes his quaint inuentions ? I can assure thee , I know a friend of mine , that would make a third in this businesse , and a fellow I tell you , that will not shrinke in the wetting , so as it may be a good fat purchase indeed , none of these leane carrion commodities , but one that may haue some good tacke and substance in it .

What tacke , what substance would you haue , sayes Sayavedra ? There is twenty thousand ducats , and a better penny to be had , if we can handsomely light vpon it . There is cloth enough ( Sir ) to cut out , to content vs all , if we will our selues , which we may order and dispose , as we shall best thinke fit . Well ( quoth I ) vnto him ; I pray God , it come not to be cut out for vs into shrowds ( you know my meaning ) and then all will be well . But I prithee tell mee one thing ; seeing thou standst thus plodding , and musing on the matter , is it possible that thou hast not yet setled vpon some one inuention or other , that may serue the turne , make the game sure , and strike it dead at thy foot ?

No in good faith ( Sir ) not any , replyes Sayavedra ; I cannot hit vpon the right ioynt ; I haue now loytred so long , that I am as farre to seeke , as if I were but newly entred into my A. B. C. I haue taken my pleasure , and liu'd so much at case of late , that through too much idlenesse , those spirits and blood , that should quicken my vnderstanding , and put life into it , are growne dull and muddy ; and my wits , for want of vse , as rustie as olde yron . A thousand times , I seeke to fall into my old trot , but I haue scarce strucken two strokes , but I grow resty and lazie , and am not able for my life to pace one true step , or to bring my selfe to that perfection and readinesse of hand , to winde you this way , or that way ( or whither-soeuer you would haue me to goe ) as I was wont to doe . Many proiects proffer themselues vnto me , but I pitch vpon none , as misliking all , proposing this and that , and t'other course ; but in conclusion , none sorted to my liking .

When I heard him say so , I thus made answer thereunto . Since it is a busines of that importance as thou sayst , what share shall I haue out of it , if I shall rid you of this care , & bring you ( like valiant conquerors ) brauely off with the victory ?

Sir ( said Sayavedra ) my part , and my person are both at your disposall ; but as for Aguilera , you were best talke with him your selfe , and when you two are agreed , I make account the businesse is as good as ended , and all shall be as we would haue it .

Goe to then ( said I ) goe and seeke him out , and see if you can come to speake with him , but with that secrecy , that you be sure you be not seene by any of his masters house ; and wish him ( when his leysure will giue him leaue ) that he and I may talke a word together , and it shall not be long ere he and I be better acquainted , being I know him ( by your report ) so well already .

He did so : sending a ticket secretly vnto him ; and when we were met , I began to wyre-draw him , and to question him somewhat more particularly , touching his masters disposition , his condition , and qualitie , what store of wealth he had , in what commodities it did most consist ; how , and where it lay ; what moneys he had in present cash , and vnder what keyes ? When I had done ; he began to make his relation vnto me , in this manner , as I here deliuer vnto you .

Sir , I assure my selfe Sayavedra hath sufficiently informed you of me ; yet my selfe shall giue you to vnderstand , that I am by my profession a k k The Spanish word is , Calafate : That is to say ; El que con maço y escoplo apriet a las junturas delas tablas , de modo que no pueda calarlo el agua . It seems to be a Flemish word . Becanus in his fourth booke Hermathe●…ae , pag. 74. saith thus : Caluatem , esse idé , qu●… vltimam manum navibus imponere , & efficere , ne aquam per rimas vllas admittant . quod tamen vorbum , per excellentiam navibus tribuitur ; cum alioquin ad quaevis vasa integra reddenda spectet , vbi ratio ipsius requirat . &c. But by Becanus leaue , how soeuer he would fetch this word from the Flemings ; I must be so bold as to affirme , that it is d●…riued from the Hebrew word , Caphar bituminare . And from thence , Cafatar , and Calafatar , by interposing the letterd , whence it comes to be Calafare . Covar●… . p. 172. caulker of ships , and a reasonable good mariner , but as poore , as poore may be . And albeit I am not ignorant , that thousands with a great deale lesse wit , haue growne to a great deale of wealth in the world , yet I haue seene some others more able , and more deseruing , to haue come to the gallowes , my selfe being none of those , that haue least deserued it : for which escape , I render infinite thanks to his diuine Maiestie . It is a yeere , and somewhat more ( which is the time of my abode in this Citie ) that I haue serued a Merchant , and haue taken a great deale of paines in his seruice . And it is about some foure moneths since , that he hath made me the keeper of his cash . All his bookes , are in my hands , but his moneys , in his owne . Am●… & timeo : I loue , and yet I am afraid ; nor can I resolue with my selfe , how I may so handsomely rob him , that I may not afterwards come to cut capers in the ayre ; and to venture a stretching , for that which is not worth the catching , it were better for me to continue still as I am . But where much is to be had , a man will hazard himselfe much . Here is store of gold to be had , and he is worthy to weare it , that winnes it . I haue communicated my minde to Sayavedra ; for it is more then one man can doe , to manage such a peece of businesse , as is this . He had need to conferre with some confident friend , or other , or more , whom he is assured he may safely trust . For , as mens opinions are diuers ; and so many heads , so many mindes ; euery one deliuereth ( as his iudgement shall direct him ) which is the best course he thinks to be taken . And sometimes it so falleth out , Quod bonus ●…ormitat H●…merus : That the wisest man , doth not alwayes hit vpon the right : when as a shallower braine , doth now and then wade , and that happily too , through the deepest fords of humane affaires . And when , this last night , I receiued Sayavedra's ticket , wherein he signified , that he was desirous to speake with mee , I thought it was no idle errand , that he went about , but that there was something in the winde , what euer it were . For I haue knowne him a long time ; and that it is not his fashion to put forth to Sea , but when he hath some good prize in chase . And I am verily perswaded , that if this matter be wisely handled , and that we finde good firme footing in the passage of this fo●…d , and through our owne indiscretion , doe not wilfully cast away ourselues , we may bring this businesse brauely about , and make our selues men for euer .

Touching his wealth , I can truly affirme vnto you , ( as one that knowes and hath often seene it ) that those commodities , which he hath now in cellerage and other ware-houses within his owne doores , which to Gentlemen , and others that want moneys , he l l The Spanish word 〈◊〉 , 〈◊〉 that is ; When the 〈◊〉〈◊〉 vpon 〈◊〉 at 〈◊〉〈◊〉 an●… by 〈◊〉〈◊〉 them afterward●… at 〈◊〉 rates . M●…a , is likewise , when a man b●…ye as ●…for said , an●… sells cheape . They that are in wa●…m for to 〈◊〉 some debt , ●…e thes●… 〈◊〉 as . Some de●…e ●…t from t●…e He ●…rew word hater , fodere . Others say , Mohatra , qua●… 〈◊〉 , from Mota●… , to me ●…e , or a●…de . This ill manner of buying and 〈◊〉〈◊〉 forbid by th●…●…wes of Spaine , and is se●…erely 〈◊〉 , being 〈◊〉〈◊〉 . 29. 〈◊〉 . 4. lib. 3. de la nueua recopil . and Ley●… 22. tit . 〈◊〉 . lib. 5. Covarr●… pag. 552. sells vpon credit at excessiue deare rates , buying them afterwards at easie prizes by the helpe of his brokers , amount to more then twenty thousand ducats . Whereof , oftentimes he deliuers me the keyes , out of the great trust and confidence , that he hath of mine honestie . Besides , he knowes very well , that those bales are too big for me to carry away , and therefore will spare the labour to lade my ba●…ke , with such vnprofitable burthens as my weake shoulders are vnable to beare . That which he 〈◊〉 cofered vp in two yron chests , in seuerall sorts of coyne , come to some fifteene thousand ducats , and better . And in his Escritorto , or Tye , that he hath in his shop , some twelue dayes since , did he shut vp a delicate d●…pple gray m m Gato , is not onely a ●…at , but is also taken for a purse full of money , which is made of a Cats skin . To a couetous rich miser t●…ey vse to say ; Ata el gato . Covarr . verb. Gato . Cat , as gentle , and as tame as my selfe , not with his eyes s●…arkling , nor his nayles scratching , nor his teeth as sharpe as any razor , but cram'd full with crownes , three thousand crownes , in good , dainty braue ruddocks , all good double pistolets , some peeces of two , and some of foure , not one single one amongst them all . Which he hath purposely laid aside for a certaine Merchant , who is to take them vpon vse for six moneths , which he will looke to be well paid for . There is not a man in all this Towne that hath so bad a name , or is so ill belou'd , as he is . There is no man , that wishes him good ; nor any whom he doth not hurt . There is not a true word , that comes out of his mouth , he hath not one friend in all the world , he is counted one of the Caterpillars of the Common-wealth , and such a one as would cozen his owne father ( were he liuing ) and negotia●…es with none , whom one time or other , he doth not deceiue . And well assured I am , that whatsoeuer losse should light vpon him , it would be ( as they say ) n n En h●… , y en paz . Como si dixera , congusto de todos . Covarr . verb. Haz pag. 463. en haz , y en paz , with the good liking of all men . I know not one man that would be sorry for it , but would laugh heartily at it , and make them-selues therewith exceeding merry .

He acquainted me likewise with his name , where he dwelt , in what place , and on which hand the cab●…net stood , as also the box , wherein the Cat lay . He made me so good and perfect a relation of euery particular , that I could haue gone thither blind-fold , and haue clapt my hand vpon it . I askt him , whether there would be any matter of difficultie in procuring the print of his keies . He told me , that might easily be done ; for that he had them all tyde to one little chaine , as well those that belong'd to the magazine of his merchandize , as those that seru'd to open his yron chests , which I ordinarily brought vnto him ; when , hauing occasion to take out some thing that he was to vse , hee would call vnto me to fetch them . But being ( as he is ) a most couetous miserable wretch , his suspition and iealousie was such , that he would be sure ( for feare of the worst ) that his eye should neuer be off from them , so loath was he to lose their sight . I was glad when I heard that this might be done with that facilitie , wherein I did imagine we should haue found the greatest difficultie . Whereupon , I said vnto him ; That then , which wee must first of all begin with , and must be the ground , whereon we must worke , must be the getting of the print of these keyes in waxe , to the end that I may see the fashion of them , and set some Smith a worke , to make them out of hand , iust in euery respect according to that impression which shall be presented vnto him in the waxe .

I moreouer mentioned vnto him , that it were very fit , that we should agree vpon that which we should steale from him for the present , which I would haue to be carryed in that discreet manner , that the muchnesse of it , should not so amaze vs , as that we should not well know , which way to turne our hands ; nor the meannesse , draw vs on to aduenture our persons for a trifle ; where the danger shall be great , and the profit small .

Neither must we forget , that it is worthy our consideration , to determine before-hand , how the spoile shall be diuided , that we may not afterwards differ , when we come to sharing . Well , this theft being resolued vpon , say we should come to finger this fine pretty pusse , this sweet cat , with a delicate pudding of three thousand crownes in her belly , and so proportionably reckning alike in the rest , be it more , or lesse , we will goe so much , or so much a peece , taking them out by the tale , as they vse to doe , that sell sheepe . And for this money , if we shall rob him smoothly of it , all of vs running equally the hazard either of the gallowes , or the sword , in all naturall reason , it ought to be , that as the danger was equall , so the gaine should be equall . And so we being three of vs , euery one ought to haue a third part . But in case we shall play this game safely , and wade dry foot through this forde , and that you shall not be able to lay any fault to my charge , nor receiue any punishment by my ill managing of the businesse , euery one of vs comming off with a good reputation both of his life , and fame , his credit vncrackt , and the nut ( as they say ) whole and sound , so good an Architect , or Surueyour of the worke , shall very well deserue some reasonable allowance ouer and aboue his fellow-labourers , for his good 〈◊〉 , and onely for his cunning contriuing of the building , without any relation to the rest of his paines , that he shall take therein . And this meane I to carry away , as in reason I ought , as a due that properly belongeth vnto mee . So that if I enter vpon this businesse , and be the onely proiector to bring it handsomely about , I will haue one entire third part , wholly to my selfe , you shall make no scruple of it , but let it come faire and quietly to me , and the other two thirds that remaine , shall be equally diuided into three parts , whereof you shall haue one ; Sayavedra , another ; and my selfe , the third . So that in this , we will all share alike .

This was controuerted to and fro , and much adoe there was about it . But because I had the maior part of voyces on my side , to wit , mine owne , and that of my servant Sayavedra , who was well contented therewith , and for that the goods which we stroue about , was not any lawfull partition of a father amongst his children , we quickly agreed on the matter . Well , I had the print of them 〈◊〉 vnto me in waxe , and caused the keyes to be made out of hand , and Aguilera instructed vs in the meane while , which were which ; to the end that wee being throughly informed , which were for the shop , which for the cabinet , and which for one thing , and which for another , wee might know the better how to vse them , when we should come to put this our enterprise in execution . I afterwards told Aguilera , that I would come the next morning , and speake with his Master , and that he should diligently obserue all , that I did either say , or doe , for the better aduancing of our future designes , and that euery night we should see one another , and lay our heads together for the better ordering and finishing of that taske , which we had now taken in hand . He said it should be done , as I would haue it ; and so he went his wayes .

On the morrow I went to this Merchants Shop , and in the presence of his Scruant Aguilera , after that wee had complemented a little together , and saluted each other , I said vnto him ; Sir , I am a Gentleman , that am but lately come to this Towne , with a purpose to buy some rarities and curiosities , which this City affordeth , as well for mine owne vse as to gratifie my friends , because I am shortly to bee married in mine owne Countrey ; and haue for that end brought along with me a matter of three thousand Duckats , and somwhat more , which are now at my Lodging : I haue no acquaintance here in this Towne ; nor doe I know the fashion of this people ; nor what their manner of proceeding and dealing is : Money you know is a dangerous commodity , and runnes many hazards ; especially , when a man hath it not in that sure and safe custody as hee desireth . I know not what this or that other man is : I lye in a Lodging , where many other lodge as well as my selfe ; no lesse then a hundred goe dayly in and out ; and though they haue giuen mee a key to my Chamber ; yet am I halfe afraid they may haue a fellow vnto it , and that some incon●…nience may thereby happen vnto mee .

I haue beene informed of your quality , as also of the worthinesse of your disposition , of your plaine and honest dealing with all men ; and therfore vpon the good report that I heare of you , I am imboldened to come vnto you , to intreate you that you would be pleased to do me that kindnes as to keep them for me some few daies , til I haue made choyce and bought such things as shal serue my turne , and I shal returne you many thanks , and shall be ready vpon any occasion that shal offer it selfe , to expresse my thankfulnesse vnto you ; I am a Gentleman , and know what belongs to the acknowledgement of a receiued courtesie .

My Merchant thought he had this money already in his possession ; and I doe still strongly suspect , that hee and I did iumpe both vpon one thing ; hee , to make my money his ; and I , to steale his , and make it mine . He made proffer vnto mee both of his person and his house , and that I should as freely command it as if it were mine owne ; and that hee should bee glad to serue mee in this or any thing else : hee bid mee bring it when I would , promising to keepe it carefully for mee , and that I should haue it as oft , when , how , and in what manner my selfe should demand it of him , as my occasions required : so for the present wee tooke leaue each of other ; ●…ee , with a resolution to keepe them ; and I , with a promise to bring them thither : but I neuer came to him againe , till such time as we were to execute our exploit .

When Sayavedra and I were come home , he stood stocke still like an Asse , or like a ma●…'d man that had been garred out of his sleepe , & dreamingly drawes me out his words , asking mee where this money was to bee had , that hee was to haue in his keeping ? I fell a laughing , and said vnto him ; Didst not thou carry it him euen now ? With that hee laught . Laughest thou , quoth I ? Is this a matter to b●…e laught at ? I know that in the Car , and the Cabinet , they are kept safe enough for me . Tell your friend Agutlera , that wee must needs see him about an eight dayes hence , and will him to bring along with him his Masters o o Borrador , el paper donde 〈◊〉 se 〈◊〉 o dibuxa 〈◊〉 ; y dixo●… assi , potque ●…ndando , le ●…n quitando , y poniendo , ●…assise borra . Borra●… , o●… booke o●… remembrance , wherein hee sets downe his Solutes and his debts , what hee is to receiue and what to pay . In the interim , while wee were tarrying for a good tide , and waiting for a fit time for the effecting of our purpose , Sayaveara hauing me one 〈◊〉 to bed , finding when I had laid my selfe downe , no great desire to sleepe ; for the working of my braines ( thinking vpon old businesses ) kept me waking : I called to my seruant , who comming vnto me , I spake thus vnto him .

Sayavedra ; I haue a tale to tell thee , which though it bee but short , yet it is worth your hearing . I shall giue thee therefore to vnderstand , that once vpon A 〈◊〉 tale of an Asse that made his Will. a time the Asse ( that poore silly creature ) fell sicke , and finding himselfe much oppressed and weakned with his disease , growing euery day worse then other , insomuch that he was now almost brought to deaths dore ; at the instance of his Kinsfolke , and the earnest intreaty of his Children , which were very many , he was moued to make his last will and testament ; and each of them striuing who should bee best left , and goe away with the greatest portion of their fathers goods , the lawfully begotten , and his bastard Children went together by the cares about it . But their honest and well-meaning Father , desiring to leaue them in peace , and for auoyding of further wrangling , that euery one should know his owne , and what hee should trust to after his death , was content in the end ( for quietnesse sake ) to make his Will , diuiding his goods amongst them in this manner following .

My Will and intent is , that my Tongue ( when I am dead and gone ) bee bestowed The Asses Legacics . amongst such my Children as are Flatterers and Backbiters : to those other my children that are angry and cholericke , I bequeath my Taile for a cooler : my Eyes , I leaue to the lasciuious ; my Braines , to Alchimists and iudic●…y Astrologers ; my Heart , to the couetous ; my Eares , to the seditious and sowers of discord ; my Snout , to Epicures , Gluttons , and Drunkards ; my Bones , to the floathfull ; my Loynes , to the proud ; my chyne , to the obstinate : Let my hinder Legges , bee giuen to the Lawyers ; my Fore-feete , to the Iudges ; and my Head , to your Scriueners and Notaries . Lastly , I bequeath my Flesh , to the poore ; and my Skinne , to bee diuided amongst my Bastard-Children .

I would not for any thing , that Aguilera , bearing vs in hand that we should rob his Maister , should come to strip vs of all that wee haue , and leaue vs so naked , that wee should bee forced to couer our selues with the skinne of this our Testator . And I assure you , if hee should chance to put such a tricke vpon vs , he should shew himselfe a very wise and subtile fellow : and how we should be afterwards able to helpe our selues , God hee knowes ; for I doe not . I speake this vnto thee , for that for the better prosecution of our intent , and that it may goe well with vs , that our of those Dobloues of ten , which I haue here , wee giue him some ten of them , which will amount to a hundred Crownes ; which being no small ingagement , may much further our affaires . But I would not in any hand , that giuing vs a backe blow , and shewing vs a faire paire of heeles , hee should slip his neck out of the collar , and by little and little fall off from vs .

Sayavedra , perceiuing the doubts that I began to cast with my selfe ; to free True 〈◊〉 amongst thievs . me of this suspition , made mee this answere , Sir , if wee should put all the fiue hundred into his hands ; nay , say they were fiue hundred thousand : yet , forasmuch as it is a custome amongst vs , and a rule that wee neuer breake , to vse all faith and fidelity amongst our selues , and neuer to be false one to another , in a thousand yeares they will not deceiue you of so much as one poore mite ; but you shall haue your owne againe to a farthing . And therefore feare you nothing ; let mee runne the hazard of it , and put it to my account : for I shall bee content to stand to any losse that you shall suffer thereby .

CHAP. VII .

The robbing of the Merchant of Milan , falls out as luckily as Guzman de Alfarache could haue wisht it . Aguilera shares so much with him as of right belonged vnto him : And hee and his servant Sayavedra goe for Genoa .

FOrasmuch as Hope doth not assure vs of a true and r●…all possession , it euermore makes vs carry about vs Of 〈◊〉 . a troubled and vnquiet minde , our thoughts neuer taking rest , out of the great feare that wee haue , lest wee should faile of that which wee so earnestly desire : Onely , it is Solatium miseris , the sole comfort that afflicted soules haue ; and that safe harbour whereon they relie ; being that from it , a certaine shadow ( as it were ) of shelter and refuge , whereby those cares and troubles are eased and lightened , which our hopes delay , doth lay vpon vs . And as that hope which is secure and certaine doth dilate and extend our hearts to an assured affiance of that which wee expect ; so there is not any paine affordeth greater tonment , then that which we endure when we once come to lose it . And little lesse is our griefe , when it defers its comfort .

How many and how various thoughts did distract in this short time my two stipendary Pensioners : For , hauing not giuen them any more light , then what I haue already told you , of my designe ; I had onely sweetned their lips , and left them ( as it is in the Prouerbe ) 〈◊〉 . Co●… la miel on la boca , with a smatch of some honey in their mouth ; and therefore they could not choose but reele this way and that way , staggering and wauering with their thoughts , and in the seuerall Maps of their inconstant imaginations , one conceiuing this , another that , hatch a thousand strange inuentions ; chewing the cudde , as it were , and ruminating with them-selues , when ( a Gods name ) they should set them-selues roundly to the businesse , what the plot might bee , and how to be effected , longing to see the issue of these promised and hopefull ends , which made them almost at a stand ; being ( as it should seeme ) somewhat doubtfull whether it would goe on or no : and if it did ; yet could they not deuise with them-selues how , and in what manner this businesse was to be carried .

But when they saw the Sunne of that day appeare , no lesse by them , then my 〈◊〉 cunning plot , for to cozen the Merchant of Milan of his money . selfe , desired ; and that Aguilera had brought me that his shop-booke of accounts , according as I had appointed him . I turn'd to one of the leafes towards the latter end of the booke , where I found some memorials booked eight daies before , and in a voyd place , or blanke , where nothing was written , I set downe this that followeth : Left with me by Don Iuan Ossorio , three thousand Crowns in gold , some being peeces of ten , but most of them , of two , and of foure . Ouer and aboue , he likewise left with me two thousand Royals , in good Royals of plate . Afterwards I drew a line vpon what I had written , to shew that the booke was crost : And wrote in a different letter on the margent , ●…euolos , ●…euolos ; which is as much to say ; All this money is mine . Afterwards I shut to the booke , and gaue it him againe , and together with it ten Doblones of ten ; willing him , that when he opened the Cabinet , he should take a hundred other out of the Catt , and put those in their roome . I likewise gaue him two billets ; whereof the one said ; These three thousand Crownes belong to Don Iuan Ossorio ; And the other said , Here are two thousand Royals in plate , whose true owner is Don Iuan Ossorio . I did moreouer aduise him , that if there were any other bill , or note , in the bag , hee should take it forth , and leaue mine only there . And that of the two thousand Royals , hee should clap it into another great bag , wherein Aguilera had already told mee , there were some seuenteene thousand more , or there-abouts , for he could not know the iust number in regard they did daily put in other fresh moneyes amongst them . And that he should with all remember , that this great bag of siluer , lay in a great ch●…st , next vnto his Cabinet , and that the bag was marked with a great spot of inke neere vnto the mouth of it . With these instructions , Aguilera went his way , hauing taken order with him , that he should that night without faile , put euery thing in its right place , according as I had giuen him direction . The day following , as soone as I had dined , I walked leisurely along to the merchants shop , with my man at my heeles , as if I had knowne no such matter , dissembling the businesse very handsomely . When I was come thither , and that his eye was vpon me , as soone as he saw me , he was wondrous glad ; thinking I had brought that with me , which I meant to demand of him . We did agree both in one , in respect of the purpose that we had to deceiue each other ; but my plot was another kind of gambol , then he was aware of . We had both one end , but the meanes were diuers . Now , when wee had saluted one anothe , I said vnto him ; Tomorrow , Sir , shall I send this my seruant vnto you with a bag , and a ticket with it , desiring you that you will be pleased to giue a quicke dispatch , and to send him back ▪ vnto me as soone as you can , because I shall haue occasion to vse his seruice . My pooresilly Merchant , whose minde was more ben●… , how he should out-strip mee by his cunning , then fearfull , that I should goe beyond him , and proue in the end the craftier knaue of the two ; thought that my meaning was , that the money should be brought him the next morning ; and so said vnto me , Sir , your desire shall be fulfilled : you shall haue it when-soeuer you please to send for it .

With that , I got me out of doores , and had scarce gone twenty paces , but I returned backe againe , and sud vnto him ; Sir , since I went from hence , I haue better bethought my selfe , and haue present occasion to vse this money , and therefore ( I pray ) let me haue it . The mans colour began to change , and seeming to be somewhat troubled , he said vnto me ; What money , Sir , is that you would haue of mee ? All , Sir , ( said I ) all , for I haue occasion to vse all or it . Whereunto hee replied ; What all ? What all , quoth I ? All the gold and the siluer . He answered me , What gold , what siluer ? I told him , That siluer and gold Sir which you haue here of mine . I , any gold , or siluer of yours , No Sir , ( said he ) I haue no siluer , nor gold of yours , nor doe I know what y●… meane . Sir , said I , ( answering him somewhat roughly ) doe you make it so strange , thinke you I doe not know what I speake ? I am neither mad nor drunke ; this is pretty fine dealing indeed : this tricke will not serue your turne . No ▪ yours neither , Sir , said he ; Methinkes yours is the prettier of the two , in demanding that of me , which you neuer gaue mee ; nor haue I any thing of yours . No Sir , quoth I , Take heed what you say . Let me wish you to be a little better aduised . Leaue off your iesting , and come to earnest , for I c●…n assure you , this is no iesting matter ▪ I must not be so answerd , nor doe I take it well at your hands . Very good Sir , ( said he ) very good ifaith : it is you Sir that are disposed to iest , and to make your selfe merry with me . No more ( good Si●… ) it is enough , I pray be gone , I haue something else to doe , then to finde you talke . How S●… , be gone ? N●…y , by your leaue ( quoth I ) there is more in it then so . I must not goe hence without my money . Money , ( said he ) what money would you haue of me ? What is your demand ? Marry , I demand ( said I ) those Crownes and Reyals which I left with you the other day . With me , ( said he ) you neuer left any Crownes nor Royals with me : Goe looke your Crownes and Royals else-w●…ere ; the deuill a crosse that I haue of yours . Then said I vnto him , Are you not ashamed to auouch this before these Gentlemen , that are here present , who but euen now before them , when I told you that I would send my man tomorrow for them ; you answer'd mee , hee should haue them ; and now that I come to you for them my selfe ( hauing present vse for them ) doe you deny me them with one and the same breath ? Deny you Sir , ( said he ) I deny you nothing ; nor nothing shall you haue of me : for I receiued nothing of you ; and nothing shall I returne you . How Sir , nothing ? Did not I Sir , some eight dayes since bring you these moneys , desiring you to keep them for me , and did not you your selfe receiue them from me ? Giue me therefore my moneys , and that presently , for I will not that you keepe them one minute of an houre longer in your hands . In my hands , ( said he ? ) I haue not so much as one farthing of yours in my hands : and therefore God be with you Sir , I haue no more to say to you . It is the Deuill that deceiueth vs all . I think so indeed ( quoth I : ) for sure the Deuill did deceiue mee when I trusted you with my money . And with that , my inflamed choller , hauing set my whole face on fire , I angerly said vnto him ; What meanest thou by this , that thou wilt not restore me my money ? before thee and I part , I will make thee lay it downe here on this board , euen to the vttermost farthing , or else I will know why I shall not ; Be wise therefore in time , and well aduise with your selfe ( I would wish you ) what you doe , for feare of after-claps . The poore man was so troubled , and struck into such a feare , when he saw I was so hot and chollerick in the businesse , and so resolutely bent vpon it , that he had not a word to say ; yet at last , with a kinde of counterfaite smile , seeming to make a iest of my words , hee bid me bee gone , one while in Gods name , another in the de●…s ; saying , that he knew me not , nor who I was , nor what was my name , nor the thing that I demanded of him . Whereupon , turning my selfe about to those ( which were many ) that were there ; Art thou so impudent ( said I ) as to say , Thou dost not know who , nor what I am , thinking thereby to o●…t-face me , and to cozen me of those moneys thou hast of mine in thy han is ? But I doubt not but I shall finde good iustice in Milan , and that ( though fullsore against his will ) he should be forced to make mee peesent b b The Spanish 〈◊〉 , Vn pie a la Françesa . Vale , al instante . Covarr . verb. Pie . payment . My man denies it more and more , telling me , I had much mistaken my marke ; and that I might happely haue giuen it to some body else to keepe : for he stood stiffely vnto it , that he neither had any money of mine , nor did owe me the value of one farthing , though indeed ( he said ) he must thus farre forth confesse the truth ; That I came vnto him , and that I told him , I would leaue so much money in his hands to keepe for me , but that I neuer brought them vnto him , nor that he did either see or touch , one faithing of mine : And therefore , if I had a mind so to doe , I might goe a Gods name , and complaine to the Iustice , and that if it should appeare that hee ought me any thing , hee should bee very willing to giue me satisfaction . When I saw hee had armed himselfe with this resolution , I did open the doores of my lips a little wider , foming at the mouth for very anger , and straining my throat to a higher key , said vnto him , O thou false traytor , heauens iustice ouer-take thee , and let all the plagues light vpon thee that the earth can affoord , ( vile and wicked man as thou art ) wilt thou thus then rob me of my moneys before my face , and thus iniuriously goe about to vndoe me ? I must haue thy life , or my money . And therefore make no more adoe , but bring me hither presently my three thousand Crownes : bring them I say , and quickly too ; it shall not boore thee to denie them ; for I will either teare them out of thy throat , or make thee lay it downe here , in good gold and siluer , as thou hadst it of me .

The house was all in an vprore , and those likewise , which were present there from the beginning , that this difference happened betweene vs . Vpon this coyle and stirre ●…hat was betweene them , there came in many into the shop , as they past along the street , besides a great number of the neighbours , asking one another , what was the matter ? For now were we growne so loud , that we did not well vnderstand one another . All that were there , went enquiring , what was the cause of all this noyse , what wee quarreld about , not so few as a hundred were talking here and there , of it , and euery one relating it each to other ; some in one manner , & some in another , whilest we within drowned all that the other said , so earnest was the contesting that was betweene vs . In the heat whereof comes me in a Bargello , an officer of the same nature with our Alguazil in Castile , a kind of Sergeant or Catchpole , but he bare no Vare or white rod in his hand , as ours doe , and making the people to giue way , hee came vp where we were , being both ( through the heat of our choller ) as hot , and as red as coales . When I saw the Iustice present ( howbeit he was a stranger vnto me , and knew him no otherwise then as he was the Iustice ) I saw my sute at an end , and that the cause was like to goe with mee . And here taking my Cu , I began in a milder temper to speake thus vnto those that were by : Gentlemen , you haue seene and heard that which hath here passed betweene vs , and how , and in what manner , this naughty man hath deny'd mee mine owne money ; let his owne man speake the truth concerning this businesse , and if hee ( out of his respect to his Master ) shall refuse to deliuer what he knowes , let his owne Booke speake in my behalfe , wherein shall that appeare to be set downe , which he receiued of me , and in what parcels , and in what manner of fashion I deliuered the said moneys vnto him ; to the end that it may be knowne vnto you , which of vs is the honester man , and speakes the most truth . Should I bee so shamelesse to aske a man that , which I neuer gaue him ? Into a Cat-skin bag , that he hath , he did put into that Cabinet three thousand Crownes of mine , some of two , and others of foure , and for to make my proofes more plaine and cleare vnto you , he hath intermixed amongst them , ten Crownes of ten , which in the whole make vp iust the summe of three thousand Crownes . And in a bag , which he lockt vp within that chest , ( wherein he told mee there were at that time I deliuered him my moneys , neare ( together with mine ) about some seuenteene thousand Royals ) did he put those two thousand , he had of mee : And if this ( which I tell you ) be not true , I am content to lose it all , and that you take my head from off my shoulders , for the arrantest traytor that euer spake with tongue ; And if here in your presence , before I stirre a foot from hence , I doe not make good vnto you all that I haue said . Onely ( Gentlemen ) let me entreat ( though a stranger ) so much lawfull fauour from you , that there may present inquisition be made concerning this businesse ( considering how neerely it concernes me ) that he may not ( by gaining of time ) haue opportunitie to transport them to some other place . And turning himselfe toward the Bargello , hee said : See now ( Sir , ) I beseech you Sir to see , which of vs two , treats falsehood , which entends deceit ? The Merchant then said ; I am content to stand to this motion , and to put my selfe vpon this triall , I shall bring forth my bookes , I care not who see them , let them be perused , if any such thing be there to be found , you shall likewise see all the money , that I haue in the house , and if any such thing shall appeare as this man would make you beleeue , I will confesse that he sayes truth , and that I am in 〈◊〉 wrong . Then said they , that were present ; This businesse is now ended , they are both agreed vpon the point , and it will straight be seene , which of these two are in the right .

The Merchant commanded his seruant , that kept his Cash , that hee should bring him his great booke of Accompts ; He did so : but when he had brought it , I excepted against it , and sayd ; O thou cozening companion ; this is not the booke , it is a lesser then this , a little kind of Manuall , that a man may easily hold in his hand . Then he will'd him to fetch the Manuall that was in the Cashe , being a litle thing of some foure sheets of paper , like a note-book . Which when he had likewise brought ; No , no , ( said I ) what need so many trickes and deuices ? why doe you seeke to deceiue vs thus with your booke ? this is not that which I would haue , you need not to beat so about the bush , the bird that I looke for is not here ; I askt for your chalke , and you giue me cheese ; I would see that , wherein you did set downe those particular summes of money , you receiued of me ; it is a little long narrow booke ; you know well enough which I meane , if you were disposed to bring it fo●… . Then said Aguilera , It may bee Sir he meanes that wherein you write your Memorials , for so it should seeme by the description of it ; for there is not any other besides of that fashion , to my knowledge in the house . And bringing it before vs , hee turned himselfe towards me , and said ; Is this , Sir , the booke that you would haue ? I answered , yes , this is it , this is it , and none but this . Now ( Gentlemen ) I pray see whether I say truth or no. This will decide the controuersie , his cunning can no longer cloake it selfe , and this will make his kn●…ry plainly appeare vnto you . They began then ( hauing the booke in their hands ) to turne the leafes one by one , and when I spy'd mine owne hand , and what I had there set downe , I said ; I pray ( Gentlemen ) will you be pleased to looke vpon this writing , and to see what it saith ; Reade I pray these parcels of moneys , which he hath crost and blotted out , ( though the summes are easie to be seene ) and by that which I here perceiue , hee hath noted it in the margent to be paid . But this tricke shall not serue his turne , for I will haue my money before I goe from hence . They did all looke vpon it , and might easily discerne , those very summes , by me before mentioned . Whereat the Merchant was so mad , and so transported with passion , that he knew not what to say vnto it , but began to curse and raile , & swearing a thousand oaths , vowd that he did not know of it , nor how it came there , nor who had written it . To cleare that doubt , I answered ; I wrote this my selfe , this I confesse to be my hand , but that in the margent is a different letter , and the quotation as false as God is true ; for hee neuer return'd me one penny of it ; and in that Cabinet that stands there , if he haue not taken it thence , there are my Crownes .

Hereupon , like a furious Bedlam , he began to rage and raue extreamly , so that the standers by did vndoubtedly beleeue , that all I had said , was true . And seeking to pacifie me ( for I seemed to be very angry with this foule dealing of his , ) they wished me to quiet my selfe , and to rest contented , for the crossing of his booke was not materiall , nor his writing in the margent , that he returned me my moneys , if those things should fall 〈◊〉 right ( as I had said ) in the rest . What greater proof , ( then said I ) or what truer token can you haue of my truth & his falshood , then his late protestations , that he neuer receiued anyone penny of me , and yet you here see it set downe , though hauing a purpose to play the rogue with me , he afterwards crost it out . If he receiued it , why does hee denie it ? If he did not receiue it , how comes it here ? I pray you cause that Cabinet to be opened , where I doubt not but you may chance to finde my Doblones , where you shall light amongst them , vpon ten Doblones of ten Crownes a peece ? At this , the Merchant fell 〈◊〉 fun●… and a fretting , and stampt for very anger , refusing to open the Cab●… , and 〈◊〉 ●…ly striuing against it , as if they should haue offered to rip vp his belly , and 〈◊〉 ●…ut his heart , vowing and auerring with sundry hideous oathes , and fearfull obsecrations , that all was roguery and villany , and that there was ●…ch matter as I talkt of ; and for those Doblones of ten , he did there confidently a●…ch before them all , that he had not one , or not aboue one , ( if he had that ) in all his house . Such adoe there was , to get him to open the Cabinet , as was wonderfull ; He denied to doe it ; The Bargello was as instant , as he was stubborne , and said , hee should doe it . The latter insisted to haue the keyes ; The other resisted , and said , hee should not haue the keyes . When the Bargello saw this , he began to grow now as hot , as before he was iealous of his double dealing : and swore a great oath , that if he would not fetch the keyes , and open the Cabinet by faire meanes , and that quickly too , he would take it out of his house , and carrie it away with him , and giue particular notice of all the whole busines , to the Signor Capitan di gi●…ia , ( which is there with them of the same quality and authority as a Corregidor in Castile ) and there deposite it , that the truth thereof might be knowne . At last ( though sore against his will ) he gaue him the keyes ; and when he had opened the Cabinet ; Sir , ( said I ) there in 〈◊〉 a Boxe did hee put them in a dapple-gray Cat-skinne : They opened that Boxe , and pulled out the Cat by the eares , and going to tell the money to see if it were right or no , a piece of the Billet shew'd it selfe . When I saw that , with somewhat a more cheerefull countenance , I reard my selfe vp and said : Let this Paper , I pray , bee read ; for that scroll will declare how much there is in the bagge , and whose it is . They read it , the Contents expressing Don Iuan Ossorio , to bee their true owner . Well , they fell afterwards to tellin●… 〈◊〉 them and found them to bee iust three thousand Crownes , with those ten of ten a piece which I told you of .

Things being brought to this push , and falling out so pat as they did , my Merchant was strooke as dead as a herring , he was absolutely now gone , quite ouerthrowne horse and foote , without hope of recouery , hee had not a word to say for himselfe , nor knew not in the world what to alleage in his owne excuse : it seeming vnto him to bee Opus Daemonii , that the Diuell had a hand in it ; for hee thought it was impossible that any man should bee able to doe it . Besides , hee considered with himselfe ; that if I could finde hands , to put these things there , I might easier haue found hands to carry them away .

Hee was quite beside himselfe , and cryed out , that all was lyes and nothing but lyes ; that his goods were wrongfully taken from him ; that this money was his , and no bodies else , that the Diuell had put those Doblones there , and not hee ; that they should lay hold on mee , for I had a familiar , and a great many the like broken speeches .

Let them lay hold a Gods name on me ( said I ) so that I may haue my money out of thy fingers . I gaue him very rough and harsh language , telling him ; O thou Impostor , thou cheating raskall , hast thou yet a tongue to talke , seeing how euident thy wicked dealing appeares to all the world : open that chest too I pray ; for there lies my siluer , I saw him put it in . There is no such thing said hee ; for all the siluer that is there is mine , and so are these three thousand Crownes . How yours , I pray Sir being you did but now confesse that you had no Doblones of ten ? It was Gods will to cause thee to forget that thou hadst receiued them , that I might not lose my monies . Hee that will denie another man his owne , had need of a good memorie , as also a care to remember what hee sayes .

When I first came in hither , thou toldest mee here before these Gentlemen , that to morrow I should haue them , sending my man for them , and now that I came backe againe to demand them of thee , before the same Gentlemen , thou deniest to haue any such thing in thy keeping . Let that Chest therefore ( I pray ) bee opened , take out all that is in it , and then it shall be knowne which of vs two is the honester man , and 〈◊〉 it is that liues by cozening others , either hee or I ? They opened the Chest , and when I saw the bagge , though there were diuers other there , some of more , and some of lesser summes , reaching forth mine arme I pointed out that wit●…●…y finger , saying ; this with the blacke spot is it . In conclusion , they found that to bee true , which I had said . And this truth was the more confirmed , when pouring out that bagge for to count the monies , they met with th●…●…ther Billet , which said , That my two thousand Royals were in there amongst the rest : then I began to be louder then euer I was before , and cryde out vnto him . Thou vile naughty man , thou false crafty Merchant , thou common coozener , thou enemy to God , thou that hast neither truth nor conscience in thee : is this thy honest dealing ? this thy faire proceeding ? this thy good vsage of those that haue to doe with thee ? No maruell thou bee rich , if thou take this course with others , as thou hast done with mee : and if thou hadst my monies ( as is apparant to all the world ) how didst thou dare first to crosse and blot out what I had written ; seeking thereby to defeate me of my due ? And then afterwards so impudently to affirme that I had giuen thee nothing , and that thou didst not know whence I was , nor whither I would , and that you did not so much as know either me , or my name ? What canst thou now alleage for thy selfe ? Hast thou any more false money to coyne ? any more lyes to stampe ? See how thou art ouertaken in thy mischiefe , how blinded by thine owne wickednesse , that thou hadst not the wit ( which was Gods iust punishment vpon thee ) either to take away these memorandums , or to hide the money ? See how his diuine Maiestie hath beene pleased to make good my innocencie , and to protect my simplicitie , that downe-right plainnesse , wherewith I committed my moneys to thy custodie , presuming that I should haue them againe , when-soeuer I call'd for them . But I now verily beleeue , that he , that did aduise me that I should trust thee with my moneys , was such another sharker as thy selfe ; and one of your proiectors for your profit , a blood-hound of your owne making , to winde out your commoditie . All they that were present , with this that they had seene & heard , were as much amazed , as offended , at the Merchants base and roguish dealing , being now throughly satisfied , that I had a great deale of reason , and iustice on my side . The common voice was wholly in my fauour , the proofes , and euidences seene and allow'd , and the ill report that ran of him before , did now ring in all mens eares . Insomuch , that not a man of them , but said ; Fie vpon him , doe you not see how this greedy Cormorant would haue swallowed this poore Gentlemans moneys , which he had deliuered vnto him vpon trust ? But it is no such newes , that an vsuring knaue should like a Harpy , prey vpon other mens goods . And had he not vsed the better diligence , and had his wits about him , it had beene all vtterly lost , and damned for euer . The Merchant , who with his owne eares heard not only these , & the like , but far worse words spoken of him , had not so many mouthes , or tongues , where-with to satisfie so great a number , as there railed against him ; nor indeed was it possible for him ( as things were carried ) to iustifie himselfe , but stood like one , that did not well know , whether he were asleepe , or awake . It seemed then vnto me , that he rub'd his hands and elbowes , to call himselfe to remembrance ; or that he began to thinke with himselfe , whether he had lost those two potentiall faculties of his Vnderstanding , and Memorie , and that onely his Will was remaining vnto him , considering what had past . He ( as I told you before ) had gotten himselfe a very bad name , which made much for me , and was as good as halfe a proofe for the clearing of my businesse . And this punishment still lights vpon them that leade a lewd life , that sleight proofes are sufficient to ouerthrow them , and makes the cause goe currant against them . This onely of it selfe , without any farther adoe , would haue seru'd the turne well enough to helpe me to my money againe , which was much strengthned by those that were there present at my first comming thither , who there tooke their oath , That he said vnto me , that if I should send my seruant vnto him the next day following , I should not faile of my money , and that within a little while after , I returning thither againe , and demanding it of him , he denyed it vnto me . His owne seruant likewise swore , that I in his hearing ( as being then present ) did intreat his Master that he would keepe three thousand Crownes for me , and the aforesaid summe of Royalls , but whether I did deliuer them vnto him or no , he could not answer to that , but must refer it to his Masters booke of Accompts , which did not alwayes lye in the shop , but was often carried in , and more he could not say concerning this matter . My seruant , he on the other side swore , that he told out the moneys with his owne hands , and deliuered them vnto the Merchant , in the presence of diuers others , that were then in the shop , but knew not who they were , for he was a stranger in that place , and therefore could not haue any knowledge of them . So that , what with the pregnant proofes of all that I had said , what with seeing in what manner he had crost the booke , what with finding the summes of money ( by me mentioned ) to fall out so iust , both in their place , and number ; as also , that euery bagge had his particular billet , which told , whose the money was ; they all tooke part with me , and were mainely bent against him , not suffering him to speake a word in his owne defence , nor to heare any thing that he could say , to excuse himselfe . He had spent all his breath in vaine , and had not now the spirit to talke any more ; for , being strucken in yeeres , and seeing so strange , and vnexpected an accident as this , which he did not so much as once dreame of , thinking it impossible that he should be thus ouer-reach't , waxed thereupon so pale and so wanne , as if he had beene a dying man , continuing for a good space in a swound . All that were there , did verily beleeue , that my Merchant was dead , and that it was a iust punishment of God vpon him for his periurie and false dealing ; but he afterwards came againe vnto himselfe , but so stupid and senslesse , that I began to take compassion of him . But in these his swounings , I did comfort my selfe , that if he should chance to dye , I should haue had lesse misse of him , then of his money .

In a word , there was not any one , of all that were there , which did not say , Let the Gentleman haue his money , giue him his money . But I , knowing full well , that it was not the voyce of the vulgar ( though I was beholding to their good wishes ) that could assigne me my money ; but that it must be awarded me by the power and authoritie of the Iudge , and by course of Law , I was very warie in aduising with my selfe , how I might preuent all future mischiefes , and that the end of this businesse might be answerable to its good beginning . And therefore when they all with one vnanimous consent , and voyce , cryde out ; The money is his ; giue the Gentleman his money , giue him his money ; I answered very mildly , and gently ; No , not I ; I will none of it , I will none of it ; let it be deposited , let it be deposited . So , for the better iustification of this businesse , the Bargello , that was there present , tooke away the money with him , and deposited it in one of the neighbours hands , that was an honest man , and vn-interessed on either side . Which , with a little sute , was within a few dayes after by way of sentence , deliuered vnto me ; My merchant being not onely cozened of his cash , but condemned in costs and charges of Court , besides the generall infamie , which by this meanes fell vpon him .

When I saw so much money in these poore and sinfull hands , I did often thinke vpon that theft , which Sayavedra had done vpon me , which though it were not of that great value , yet was it not so little , but that then it fell out to my great hurt , albeit afterwards , it turned to my greater good . For if that had not beene , I should not haue knowne so much as I now doe , nor come off so cleanely with this theft . And therefore comforting vp my selfe , I said ; it was Prouerbe . the better for me , c c Si me quebre la pierna , quiça por mejor . that I broke my leg . It might haue hapt worse with mee , had it not hapt so ill . My marring , was my making ; my losse , my gaine . So that all fell out to the best . For from that time , euer since , haue I liu'd in greater credit , and better furnished with moneys , then before I was rob'd . I was growne rich , Sayavedra releeued , and Aguilera had well patcht vp a broken estate . I carryed my moneys home with me , as merrily as the heart of man can possibly imagine . I clapt it safe vnder locke and key , I looked charily vnto it , and lapt it vp very warme , that it might not catch cold . And albeit all things succeeded thus happely with me , yet Sayavedra , though he felt it , had it in his hands , and toucht it againe and againe , yet could he not beleeue it was there . It seemed vnto him as a dreame , and thought it an impossibilitie , that this businesse should proue so lucky . He fell a blessing of himselfe with both his hands , as oft as he thought vpon my craft and subtletie . For albeit , when he was acquainted with me in Rome , and knew my course of life , and did perceiue by my cariage , and manner of proceeding , that I had a subtle wit of mine owne , yet Prouerbe . for all this did he not thinke , nor could be brought to beleeue , that I had so much store , as he now found to be in me . Or that I had beene so good an Archer as I was , d d Matarlas en el Ayre . i. s●… vn hombre muy agudo , y cortesano . Covarr . verb. Matar . to kill birds , as they were flying in the ayre . He supposed , I must haue come much short of himselfe ; for he was many yeeres my ancient , and might very well ( for his standing ) haue beene my master , and I his apprentise some six yeeres at the least , to haue learned the Trade . I said then vnto him ; Friend Sayavedra ; This is true knowledge , this is the right skill of it , this the Art , and the cunning , to steale without danger , e e Hurtar , sin peligrar , y bien medrar . and to liue and thriue well by it . As for those things , which thou didst preach vnto me vpon the way , they were lessons of the Turkish Aleoran , meere toyes , and trifles to these . To steale a kirtle , and receiue a hundred stripes for it , euery foole can doe this . Your expences , f f The Spanish phrase is ; Mas es la data , que elcargo . exceed your receits ; and the gaines , will not quit the cost . And therefore , wheresoeuer I shall come , such as you may vayle bonnet , strike sayle , stooping your standard to mee , reuerencing mee as your king and superiour .

Some two dayes after , comes Aguilera for his share , stealing by night vnto vs . And had it not beene for Say●…vedra , I had show'd him Velez his tricke , who ranne away with the bride , and the bride-cake too . The deuill a penny he should haue had of me . But because I was willing to vphold my reputation with him , and that he might not conceiue an ill opinion of me , by leauing so foule an impression of falsifying my word behinde me , and that he might not take occasion to say to himselfe ; Surely , if this man deale so vniustly with another , it is a thousand to one , he will vse me in the same manner . I must drinke in the end of the same cup , as he hath done ; I would not hazard much , to get a little . Aguilera told vs , that his master was euen ready to dye for very griefe , and almost mad with imagining how this was brought about , and that it would not sinke into his head , but that this was the deuils doing , and that he , and none but he , was able to bring such a thing to passe . I told him out a hundred crownes , for those Doblones of ten , which he had receiued of me with his Guzman shares the theft with Aguilera , and Sayavedra . owne hands , and gaue him iust to a haire , as much as his share came too . Hauing dispatcht him , I came to Sayavedra , and offred him his part , together with the gaines of the former fiue hundred crownes . But he told me , that he knew he was sure enough of them , when-soeuer he should haue occasion to vse them , and that not knowing well where to keepe them , he was content they should remaine still in my hands , till he should finde some fitter opportunitie to dispose of them .

We continued in Milan , some ten or twelue dayes after this , though not altogether free from feare , lest the winde might chance to chop about ; and therefore we did agree to goe from thence , and to get vs to Genoa , making no body liuing acquainted with our intended iourney , nor spake so much as one word of it our selues , for feare of what might follow thereupon . But rather gaue out , that wee were to goe for some other place , farre wide of that , faigning a businesse , which did much concerne vs , to make all the haste we could .

It was my chance ( before I went away ) to walke through one of the streets in Milan , wherein there was such choyce and variety of wares , and in that abundance , that I stood amazed at the sight of them ; and by chance I espy de a chaine in a certaine shop , which they had sold to a Souldier : which in my eye , was one of the fairest that euer I saw . I had such a great good liking vnto it , and was so earnestly affected with it , that I was resolued either to buy it , in case they had not already agreed vpon the price , or to take order to haue iust such another made me . Whereupon , I drew neere vnto the stall , and standing by , began to looke vpon it , without giuing them to vnderstand that I had any minde thereunto ; but it pleas'd me so well , and I was so taken with it , that vpon the sodaine , in that little scantling of time , taking it to be fine and pure gold , I had presently plotted in my head , how I might haue it along with me to Genoa , and that without any great labour . I stood listning , while he was bargaining for it , and while they were thus beating the price , the seller demanded very little for it , which me thought was dog-cheape ; whereupon I began to suspect , that what hee asked , was rather for the workmanship of the chaine , then the chaine it selfe : but they , not agreeing on the price , I began presently to pitch my hey ; asking him what it might bee worth , and what it weighed . I had no sooner made him this question ; but the Merchant casting vp his head , lookes vpon mee , and falls withall a smiling , telling mee ; Sir , this is not to bee sold by the weight ; but taking it altogether as it is , wee sell it as reasonably as wee can afford it .

This word alone was enough ; for by this I knew that it was false and counterfeit : and holding it a great basenesse for so slight a toy to hazard much treasure , and that this plot of mine , which I had already cast in my head , might stead mee better hereafter , reseruing it for some great occasion , and of more importance then this could bee ; besides , being that no wise man will aduenture his person for nifles in a bagge , I forbor●…o execute my purpose ; wisely considering with my selfe , that if I should haue gone on with this , and miscarried therein , it would haue beene a sufficient proofe against mee , that I had plaid the Impostor in my late businesse with my Merchant . I presently therefore came to his price , and paid it him with as good a will as if it had been a thing of great value : and I must tell you , that I made no small reckoning of it , in regard of those designes for which I intended it ; and particularly in that , which ( as it afterwards fell out ) turned to my exceeding great good and benefit . For which purpose , ( hauing the plot already in my pate ) I resolued with Guzman plotteth a new deceit . my selfe to make mee one of gold out of hand , iust of the same making and fashion as that was in euery respect , that you should not bee able to discerne which was which : so like would I haue them to bee the one to the other .

Whereupon I got me to a Gold-smith , who made it according to my minde , showing himselfe so good an Artizan , that should you haue taken them both into your hand , and compared them together , it was impossible to iudge which was the true one from the counterfeite , saue only by the sound and the weight ; for the false one was somewhat lighter then the other , sounding more bell-like ; whereas that of gold was more massie , and had a more churlish kinde of sound with it : it cost mee in the whole , about some sixe hundred and thirty Crownes , and I should not haue beene sory , if I had bestowed a thousand ; for then that counterfeite one should haue yeelded mee as much : with them I bought likewise two little curious boxes , as like as like might be , to lay vp these chaines in , each by himselfe in his seuerall boxe , which were fitted and fashioned as I could haue wisht them .

And because all the ioynts of my body did still paine mee very much , conceiting Turne to the first Part of Guzman , the third Booke , and the first Chapter . with my selfe that my ribs and my huckle bones were dislocated and slipt out of their right places , euer since that nights kinde entertainment , which my worshipfull Vncle gaue mee ; which I haue kept hitherto written in my soule , the inke thereof being not as yet dry : and being now vpon the way for Genoa , I imparted some part of my minde to Sayavedra , not recounting vnto him all the whole Story of it ; but onely acquainting him , that when I past that way , being but a childe to speake of , some of my friends had done mee an affront , and put a ieast vpon mee ; because I was not either in such good cloathes as might honor and grace their company , or so flush of money , that they might get something by mee . And I was heart-angry with my selfe that I had told him so much ; because hee should not take mee in a lye , if hee should chance to remember what I had told him before .

But letting that passe , and dwelling no longer vpon it , I went on in my discourse , and said farther more vnto him : if thou Sayavedra wert that true friend as thou professest thy selfe to be vnto me , thou wouldst ere this haue beene * * Hee here texeth Mateo Luxan Sayavedra , the Author of the false second Part , for his omission of a promised reuenge , mentioned in the first part , by our Author , Mateo Aleman . at Genoa , and haue reuenged the wrong that I there receiued . But I must bee inforced to doe it my selfe , supplying thy default , and neglect thereof , by mine owne industry . It will also well beseeme mee so to doe , that I may cancell that obligation , and pay this debt that I owe them , to the end that those good turnes which they did mee , may bee fully requited ; and receiue not onely the principall , but vse for forbearance . But to remoue all suspition , we must doe that which you and your brother did , change both our apparell and our names . I like very well of it ( said Sayavedra ) and further promise vnto thee , that I will inherit thy true name , that I may the better both imitate and serue thee . From hence forward therefore I style my selfe Guzmande Alfarache : and I ( directing my speech to Sayavedra ) will inuest my selfe with mine owne proper name , which I inherited from my Parents , and vntill now , haue not hitherto taken it vpon me . For , a Don ought to be a gift which comes from the holy Ghost ; because it is admitted , and well receiued of others , or it must bee deriued from the direct line , from father to sonne . For your Dons , that now strut it vp and downe Italy , glorying more in this title , then the Peacocke in his painted plumes , are nothing but infamy and shame . For there is not a Spaniard in these parts , ( though the sonne of a Cobler ) but goes adorning himselfe with the name of Don , that hee may be held a Gentleman . And if it goe there as it doth here , a man may very well aske , without offence ; who keepes the Swine ? Henceforth , I call my selfe Don Iuan de Guzman : and with this title will I content my selfe . Then said Sayavedra , with a iocond heart and a cheerfull countenance ; Don Iuan de Guzman , g g In Spain when a Comedian acts his part exceeding well , the applaudite they there giue him , is to cry , Vitor , Vitor , Vitor , such a one , Pinedo , or Fernandez . Uictor , Uictor , Uictor : which name can become no man better then your selfe ; so well it sutes with your noble actions : confusion light vpon that Trait or that shall seeke to spot it . Hee ( my braue boy ) that shall take it from thee , my curses shall pursue him to death . I had furnished my selfe in Milan , with as much rich silke Grogram , as would serue to make mee a cloake , and a h h Sotana , a g●…rment much like our Clergie-mens Cassocks here , which reacheth no farther then the knee : which is the common weare of your Grandes , and other Noblemen and Gentlemen in Spaine . Dizesi Sotana , porque se trae soto el manteo . Covart . Sotana ; and so being prouided of all things necessary , wee began our iourney for Genoa .

CHAP. VIII .

Guzman de Alfarache comes to Genoa , where being knowne by his kindred , he is feasted by them . He perswades euery one to liue vertuously ; And showes the hurt , which Murmurers , Hypocrites , and false Witnesses , bring to mens soules , honours , and riches ; He deliuereth the great profit , we shall gaine , by auoiding such venemous Basiliskes . And concludes with telling vs , who are true thieues indeed .

LOng will the vessell keepe that his sent and sauour , wherewith Quo semel imbuta recens , &c at first it hath beene fully seasoned . If the course of my life , the occasions and the chances that befell me , Loue , & Feare , had not opened the eyes of my vnderstanding ; if these I say , could not awaken me , and rouse me vp from the sleepe of my sinnes , and those vices , wherein I was full'd so fast asleepe , I cannot perswade my selfe , that any other humane forces are of power to doe it . And howbeit , with stratagems , inuentions , deuices , and diuers other meanes , it might be brought otherwise to passe ; yet not with that easinesse and facility , ( as some may imagine . ) For it will require a large Discourse , how , and in what sort , a man ought to make his election , by distinguishing profit , from dis-profit ; iust , from vniust ; and good , from ill . And when it once comes to this point , the businesse so stands then with him , That hee that will be but willing to put his owne helping hand to get out of that mire of sinne , wherein hee lies wallowing , The force of vertue . and endeuour to free himselfe from that muddy sinke of vice , those good inspirations of heauen , shall neuer be wanting vnto him , which fauouring , and furthering his vertuous actions , will adde strength vnto his weaknesse , and raise him vp from the death of sinne , to the life of grace . To the end , that knowing and acknowledging his fore-passed errors , he may learne to correct his faults for the present , and for the future , grow vp to perfection . But they that are deuoid of reason , who like the Bull , shut their eyes , and bowe Men without reason , and who they be . downe their heads to giue a blow , following their owne wilfull appetite , seldome or neuer , shall come to the knowledge of their owne misery . Because , like they that are blind , they will not see ; and like those that are deafe , they will not heare : and out of a headstrong and wilfull humour , will not giue way , that any should crosse them in their lewd courses . They take great ioy and delight in walking in the path of their owne lusts ; it seeming so long vnto them , that it shall neuer haue an end , or that this life of theirs shall euer come to be cut off ; whose happinesse ( they make account ) doth onely consist in this their vaine and idle idolatry . These are men of a large life , but a farre larger conscience . They loue the broad , better then the narrow way . They know full well , that they doe ill ; and therefore doe ill , because they haue no mind to doe well . They feigne them-selues to be ignorant of that , which they are not willing to vnderstand ; yet wot well enough , that the thred of their life , goes daily wearing and wasting away ; and that the string by which it holds , must cracke and breake in sunder , in the end ; and then their perpetuall downe-fall , will fearfully and with a great deale of terror , present it selfe vnto them .

But because wee see that Gods hands are nayled fast , that they stirre not against vs , and that he is much grieued and afflicted for vs ; we thinke , it would much vexe him , that we should be vexed . Such fooles as these , say to them-selues ; The language of fooles . we feele no paine , nor haue any aches , but are sound and lusty ; wee want no money , but haue the world at will ; our house is well furnisht , we haue plenty of prouision ; let vs lye downe and sleepe , and take our ease , stretching our selues on our yuorie beds ; let vs liue as merry as the day is long , sport while we may ; we haue time enough before vs , we need not to make so much haste to goe vnto God , shortning that life , ( by lessening our pleasures ) which God hath allotted vnto vs . They deferre their doing of good , and put off their amendment of life , from an houre , to a day ; from a day , to a weeke ; from a weeke , to a month ; from a month , to a yeare ; and from one yeare , to many : so that houres , dayes , weekes , months , and yeares , runne posting along by vs ; but this quando , this when , is not yet come ; this time , that we should repent and amend our sinfull liues ; And when it doth come , it shall bee happy for vs , if it come not too late . This is that debt which is said to be recouered at three seuerall payments ; but if neither in our youth , our manhood , nor in our elder age , we doe satisfie this debt , the punishment that will light vpon vs for non payment , will be certaine , sharpe , and sodaine .

What meanes the Vsurer , that he hath not God in his mind , nor doth once thinke vpon him , acknowledging no other God , but his vngodly gaine ? What An exageration against the enemies of vertue . the Wanton , who to please his lust , adoreth her , whom he ought rather to hate ? and placeth all his happinesse in that , which he knowes must turne to his eternall torment ? What the Epicure , or the proud man , that sonne of Lucifer , who makes it his common practice , to martyr the innocent , being more cruell therein , then Dioclesian , oppressing the righteous , and persecuting the vertuous ? What the vnprofitable Murmurer , who hoping to make himselfe a fortune , seekes to vndoe other men ? Scraping , like the a a Escarua la gallina por su mal . hen , to her owne hurt ; whilst Prouerbe . vsing diligences to preiudice others , they light vpon that , which workes their owne bane ?

The man , that is honest , well able to liue , and of a good life , and ciuill conuersation , doth not rob , filch , nor steale ; for he liues contented with those fauours which God hath beene pleased to bestow vpon him ; hee maintaines himselfe with that , ( be it more , or little ) that he hath , feeds his familie , and sustaines both himselfe , and others . And such as these , are wont , in their contemplations , to lift vp their eyes to heauen , and to breathe forth this sweet and thankfull meditation : O Lord , I haue as much , as is needfull for me , and somewhat ( I thanke thee ) to spare , to giue vnto others . And these good Christians The honest Christian . count it an happinesse and honor vnto them , when through Gods blessing , and goodnesse towards them , they are able to say ; that they haue something yet remaining of their store , to giue vnto the poore , and such as need their reliefe .

The thiefe he steales , because it is his onely maintenance , hauing no other The Thiefe . meanes to liue . And when all is gone , and that he hath nothing of his owne , he seekes to snatch from others , if he can but once come to lay his hands on it . He that is a noble Gentleman , will euer so farre forth respect his honour and credit as is fitting for him , and seeke to maintaine his port , and to liue like him-selfe , in a liberall and plentifull manner ; but yet will not sticke to grace , and doe good to others .

But on the contrary , the Murmurer maintaines himselfe with the honor of Murmurers . his friend , and of his neighbour , robbing him of his good name , and lessening his worth , as much as in him lies ; for , if he rob not others of it , he thinkes he shall not haue any for him-selfe . It is as strange , as to bee pittied , that the sea , should breed fishes , that haue no tongue ; and the earth bring forth men , that haue too much : that the sea should afford vs Soles ; and the earth , men that haue no soules .

Your Hypocrites , who boast their letters of credit , which they haue giuen Hypocrite . to the world ; are like vnto those that play at Tennis , who strike the ball against the ground , that it may the better come to their hand , and tossing it to and fro in the ayre , keepe it vp a good while , till it come to be either a chase , or a losse . But of all other , most wretched , and most miserable are those men , who make long prayers with their lips , and deuoure with their mouthes , the goods of the poore , the widow , and the fatherlesse . Wherefore God will seuerely punish these holy offenders ; holy in outward show , but not in heart . An Hypocrite , is like vnto a gun , that is charg'd ; for euery man doth not know , what is within it , or whether it be charg'd or no ; but if you once put fire to it , the least sparke wil send forth a bullet , that shall ouerthrow a gyant , and lay him on the ground : So , your Hypocrite , vpon euery little occasion , how-soeuer hee may seeme for the present to haue no harme in him , will vent his malice , and be ready to doe you a mischiefe ; and when you least thinke of it , giue you such a blow , that your shall neuer be able to rise againe .

There are a certaine sort of men , that are like vnto your dry witherd Peare-trees ; Dissemblers . leane , tall , and stooping ; hanging their heads in their bosomes , as if they would seeme to bee Saints , and goe lapt vp in a long thred-bare cloake , as if they were to accompany a Coarse to the graue , or were them-selues to be interred . These are fooles of the first forme ; and will with this their dissimulation and graue carriage , make vs beleeue , that they are wonderfull wise , and of great vnderstanding . These I say are principall fooles ; they will steale you foure or fiue sentences out of this , or that other Author , whereof they make a Gallimafrie , seruing them in , as a dish of their owne making , recommending it vnto vs as theirs . They feigne their iustice , to be equall with that of Traianes ; their sanctitie , with that of Saint Paul ; their wisedome , with that of Salomon ; their sincerity , with that of Saint Francis ; yet vnder this cloake , what shall you find ? If you search it well , you shall find , an hypocriticall knaue , a seeming Sanctificetur , but as arrant a villaine , as euer trode vpon a shooe of leather . They carry a leane , and meager countenance , but their workes flourished ouer with painting ; little breeches , but large consciences ; nothing but yes verily , and indeed , in their mouthes ; but their heart is full of lies ; a publike kind of charity , but an insatiable secret auarice ; they manifest a kinde of abstinence and fasting , as well from meates , as temporall meanes ; but their throats are so drie , and their thirst so great , that they will swallow vp the whole Sea , deuoure other mens estates , and yet be so farre from being satisfied therewith , that they remaine as thristy as they did before . They say , they haue enough , and more then enough , and that much lesse would serue their turne , and is more then they are worthy of ; yet are they so greedily giuen , that they are neuer contented , and nothing can fill their hungry maw . They are like vnto your Dates ; soft and sweet without , but hard and stonie within . They carry hony-combes in their mouthes , but wormewood in their hearts . They haue sweet tongues , but sowre soules . Great pitie is to be taken of these men , for that they suffer so much , and enioy so little ; and are finally condemned to Hell , for this one poore fading vanitie , to be esteemed honest and religious , when indeed they are nothing lesse . So that , they neither cloath their backs , nor feed their bellies , according to their owne content and liking , but goe vp and downe in a miserable kinde of manner , afflicted , hunger-staru'd , withered , pale , and wanne , denying them-selues ordinarie necessaries for the vse of this life , not being able truly to say , that they haue had one houre of content in this world , bearing alwayes about them a troubled bodie , and an vnquiet minde , their corps , and conscience equally suffering . Now if this , which they thus , and in this manner suffer , as they doe it , and endure it , onely for the worlds sake , and to seeme outwardly holy , that thereby they may gaine a good opinion amongst men ; if they would doe this , I say , for Gods sake , laying aside their dissimulation , and not debarring them-selues of those good blessings , which God hath created for mans vse and comfort ; questionlesse , in so doing , they might leade a happy life in this world , and enioy euerlasting happinesse in the world to come .

Let vs say something of your false witnesse ; whose punishment doth giue satisfaction to the people , and is pleasing vnto all men , taking pleasure in their False witnesses . chasticement , in regard of the hainousnesse of their offence . For , for a matter of sixe Marauedis , a thing of nothing , you shall haue them sweare sixe thousand falshoods , and take away sixe hundred thousand mens credits , and estates from them , which lies not afterwards in their power to make restitution thereof . And as your day-labourers , and other workemen , repaire to certaine set-places , appointed for that purpose , to be hired by those that haue occasion to vse them ; so doe these kind of men come to your Courts , your Consistories , your places of publike businesse , euen to the very Offices where your Notaries are a writing , to learne how things goe there , and to offer their seruice to those that haue need of them . And if this were all , the matter were not great , but it is worse then you thinke it is ; for the very Officers of the Courts them-selues , doe maintaine and countenance these lewd fellowes , that in those causes that occurre ( as occasion shall serue , ) they may make vse of them for their aduantage , suborning them to beare false witnesse , for the prouing of such , or such a businesse , which they will not sticke to testifie vpon oath . This I assure you , that I now tell you , is no iest ; nor doe I therefore speake it vnto you , to make you beleeue that which is not so ; nor doe I lie one iot , in all that I haue said vnto you . For there are false witnesses enough to be found , if any man be disposed to buy them . And are as frequent in your Notaries Office ; as Conserues in an Apothecaries shop . Or like horse-leeches in a glasse , ready prepared for the businesse , when-soeuer you shall be pleased to put them vpon it . Let those that haue a minde vnto them , goe to D. N. his Office ; I was about to name him , before I was aware , but t is all one ; for I am sure you all know him , or can giue a shrewd guesse whom I meane ; there shall you haue these Knights of the Poste , at all kind of prices , as you shall haue pies in a Cookes shop ; some for eight Royals , some for foure , some for two , and some for halfe a Royall , as choosing rather to play small game , then wholly to sit out .

But if it be a weighty cause indeed , there is also another sort of them , of a higher rank , and at a higher rate , as we see there are pies for weddings , and for great feasts , which will cost you somewhat more then ordinary ; these are those , that are Musket-proofe , and will ( to strike the matter dead ) not sticke to sweare , that vpon their owne knowledge , for these foure-score yeares , they remember such and such a conueyance was past thus and thus , such a piece of land past ouer after this or that manner , and a hundred the like .

Like to that Country-clowne , who being a shallow braind coxe-combe , a A Country fellowes mistake : for ochenta annos , he names ochoçientos . very lob-cocke , being brought into the Court by his Land-lord , to witnesse a thing in his behalfe ; and instructed by him , that when hee should be askt how old hee was , should answer , he was eighty yeares old . The silly fellow , did not well vnderstand him , but being desirous ( as it should seeme ) to doe his Land-lord a pleasure , being demanded touching his age , tooke his oath , that he was eight hundred yeares old . And albeit the Notary wondring at this so inconsiderate and vnaduised an oath , did aduise him to take heed what hee said ; he clownishly made answer , Doe thou take heed how thou writest , and stand not a sifting of other mens liues , but let euery man bee as old as hee will him-selfe . Afterwards , the Notary reading the report of this witnesse , when he came to the point concerning his age , the Iudge apprehended it to bee the Notaries error , and would haue punisht him for it ; but hee excused himselfe , saying ; That he did no more , then what did belong to his office , in setting that downe aright , which he receiued from the witnesse his owne mouth ; and that although he had admonished him thereof , and bid him be better aduised , yet he stood stifly in it , and ratified what he had said before , saying ; That he was of that age , and that he should so set it downe . The Iudges caus'd the witnesse to make his personall appearance ; and demanding of him , why hee had sworne , that he was eight hundred yeares old . Because ( and it like your Lordships ) it was for the seruice of God , and the Conde , my master .

There are store of false witnesses euery where , the streets are full of them , they are to be hyred for money , but he that will saue his purse , and haue them for nothing , let him seeke out some kinsman or other , that is his enemie , with whom thou wagest law ; for he to be reuenged of him , will sweare any thing against the whole generation of thy aduersarie . But from these malitious minded men , good Lord deliuer vs . For they doe vs the greatest hurt .

But let vs leaue these kinde of men , and come to those of mine owne occupation , and to that our Companie , or Brotherhood , which is the ancientest and greatest that is in the world . For I would not haue thee to tit me in the teeth , that I haue a pen for others , and let mine owne stand idle in my standish , or else cause it to runne another way . I will not passe by this doore , without knocking at it , and that soundly too ; I will not lye lazing in the shade , nor making my selfe merry in the Tauerne .

A thiefe , what will he not doe , to steale ? Which word Thiefe , I apply to Of Theeues . Who be the braue theeues . such poore sinfull creatures as my selfe . As for your great rich theoues , such as ride on their foot-clothes of veluet , that hang their houses with hangings of tiss●…e and costly arras , and couer the floores of their chambers with gold and silke , and curious Turky-carpets , and often hang such poore snakes as wee are , I haue nothing to say to them . For wee are farre inferiour vnto them , and are those little fishes , which these great ones doe deuoure . They liue brauely , vpheld by their reputation , graced by their power , and fauoured by flatterie ; These , are of that strength , that they breake the gallowes ; hempe was not sowen for them , nor for them were your Galleys built , except it be to beare command in them . Of which command , it may be , that we shall remember to say something in its proper time and place , if we hap to come thither , as I hope in God , we shall . But let vs now speake of those theeues , that are not fit to be left out , such as my selfe , and my seruant Say●…vedra . We will not touch vpon those that rob Iustice ; for there are none such I trow that will doe so , nor is it knowne , who they be . And if peraduenture there be any such , that haue done so , we haue already spoken thereof at large in our first Part. Nor will we speake of your Rulers , nor Gouernours , nor your Counsellors of State , for we haue likewise created thereof heretofore ; besides , their managing of these matters , is not of any importance at all , or worth the talking of . For take them out of their tracke , put them from their whole-sale , and turne them to retayle , or remoue them from that pond , wherein they haue liu'd , and they are to seeke which way to winde them-selues ; I will not giue a button for the best of them .

But some perhaps will taxe me , and say ; That thou art , as they are ; both birds of a feather ; seeing thou art so willing to smother their lyes , their deceits , and their falshoods . For , if it should be demanded , what meanes hath Master N ? The answer would be ; Sir , He is a Regidor . What , is he no more then a Regidor ? How liues he then thus gallantly ? How can his Office alone maintaine this brauery , hauing no set reuenues , or other rents comming in besides , considering what a port he carryes , what a house he keepes , what store of seruants , and horses , that continually attend him ? You say well Sir . But I perceiue by you , that you doe not truly vnderstand the mysterie of it , nor rightly conceiue , how this may be brought about . True it is , that he hath no rents , but he hath his renters , and none can execute that Office without his licence , paying him so much rent for it ; whereof the greatest part comes to the Regidor , the rest remaines to the renter , to the end , that he also may liue , and haue where-withall to discharge his rent . But why doest thou not speake freely what thou knowest concerning these men ? I may not , nor I dare not ; for if any man should presume to speake of them , oppose himselfe , though neuer so little against them , or but once offer to question either their lifes , or their actions , they will make him hold his peace with a pestilence , they will neuer suffer him to liue in quiet , but force him for his owne ease to flie the Country . For being ( as they are ) men of great place and power , they will presently fall a feeling , to finde a b b Buscan la paja 〈◊〉 el oydo . straw in thine eare ; that is , they will seeke a hole in thy coat , Prouerbe . and picke some one quarrell or other against thee , and either by right , or by wrong , they will ouerthrow thee , if not vtterly vndoe thee . They are like vnto your Cupping-glasses ; which ( where they once fasten ) sit close and hard to thy skin , and neuer leaue drawing and sucking , till they haue haled from thee what they would haue , nor is there any taking of them off , till they be as full as they can hold . I could also tell thee , that no man dares say ; Blacke is their eye ; or goe about to haue them punisht . For whosoeuer he be , that offers that , it fares with him , as it vsually doth with your pipkins ; which when they are set full of water ouer the fire , they no sooner begin to boyle , but the water runneth ouer , and puts out the fire that was the occasion thereof .

Vnderstand you me now ? Yes marry doe I : And , it may be , they passe ouer these things the better , by reason of their good Angels of guard , which free them from those blowes , that would otherwise fall vpon them , and rid them out of all their troubles . I could tell thee likewise somewhat which thou hast left out , that if these men , after they were hanged , should haue their causes heard , and see what they could say for them-selues , euen those very men would then plead stiffely against them , who heretofore were in their fauour ; but now for the feare , that they haue of them , they are well content to eat their meat in quiet , and to hold their tongues . I could tell thee besides , if I would vnmaske these men , that they fare daintily at other mens cost , haue what they will , either for nothing , or dog-cheape , making the poore to pay for it , who must pay most , and fare worst . But it is now time to make a full point , and to leaue them with their Agentes , and Consentientes , their instruments , and their copartners to them-selues : For in conclusion , they are , as thou art ; and worse then thou , and doe much more hurt ; for thou doest but damnifie one house alone ; but these a whole Country .

O what good counsell dost thou giue mee ! But let mee wish thee ( my friend ) to make vse of it thy selfe . Think'st thou perhaps to saue thine owne fingers from burning , to take the c c Sacar las brasas , con la mano del gato . Cat by the foote , and therewith to rake the Prouerbe . coales out of the Ouen ? If thou knowest this to be true , or hast any thing else to say of them , speake it your selfe for me : for I haue told thee all that I know , and I would not willingly that they should deale with mee , as thou say est they deale with others : for I haue no minde to come vnder their lash . Suffice it thee , that contrary to that decorum that is fitting for the greatnesse of their place and quality ; I haue inlarged my selfe in speaking more already ; then may well become mee . Nor am I willing to oblige my selfe anew , to sift their liues , nor diue into their doings , being there is no good to bee gotten by it , if things runne along in this straine there in Italy , God bee thanked , that I am going for Spaine , where no such robberies as these are vsed . But because I am a Spaniard , thou wilt say , that all the world is my Countrey ; it is true ; and in saying so , thou doest not lye . But shall I tell thee one thing ? I know how all this may bee remedied , and that very easily too , to the great augmentation and good of the Common-wealth , and by the generall consent of all good subiects , to Gods good seruice , and the Kings great honour ; but for the better effecting thereof , I must be forced to follow the King , presenting his Maiestie with memoriall vpon memoriall , Petition vpon Petition : and when I shall haue brought the businesse to a good passe , and as it were to the very vpshot , such a Fauourite , or such a great Lord , Don B. buzzes him in the eare , and tels him , that it is an idle and foolish Proiect , and vnable to take effect . For , it reflecting generally vpon them all , they out of their great power will trample me vnder foote , and crush mee , that I shall neuer bee able to lift vp my head any more , leauing mee in farre poorer taking , then I was before . But I am affraid to wade too farre in this deepe water , for feare of drowning . A shallower ford is safer , and fitter for me to dippe my foote in : because I speake the truth , they count mee a base and obscure fellow ; and for that I presume to giue them wholsome counsell and sound aduice , they call mee Rogue , brand me with the name of Picaro , and thrust mee out of doores by head and shoulders , scorning such a Iack-sauce , and down-right raskall as I am . But they shall not carry it away so . Let them take their course , and wee will take ours , treading in the steps of our noble Ancestors : and ( God grant ) that they that come after , doe no worse then wee doe , Onely , I will bee bold to tell you thus much ; that there are farre more thieues then there are Physitians . Neither need any man to make himselfe such a Saint , as to take offence when hee heares the name of a thiefe spoken of , shewing himselfe queasie-stomack'd , and seeking to disgrace him , till hee aske this question of himselfe ; whether , either here , or there , hee hath not in his life time playd thee thiefe himselfe ? And to this end , I would haue him to know ; that to steale , is no other thing then to detaine that which What stealing is . is another mans , contrary to the will of its owner .

For mine owne part , I would make no more reckning , that a man did not know that I had any thing of his , then if hee did know it , and had giuen it me with his owne hand , so as hee bee not able to hurt mee , and haue not the power to take it away from mee againe by force . I learned this Lesson from my Childhood , though I did not alwayes put it in practice . I was like vnto a tree , that is cut downe to the very roote , which leaues some liue-sap still remaining , by meanes whereof it growes in time to bee a new Plant , and begins to beare the same fruit it did before . And you shall see by and by , how quickly I returne to my old bias . While I left off stealing , I was like vnto forc'dearth , I was out of my proper Center ; now , with a little vse , I am come to the same lewd course that I ran before . When I was a Lad , I was quick and nimble , I had a facility in filching , and could lay hand on any thing , were it neuer so hard to come by . But now that I am turn'd Man , me thought at the first , I was growne gowty , both in my feete and hands ; I found my selfe much slower , and duller then I was wont to bee : but in a very short time I recouered my former health .

I continued my accustomed thefts , & took such pleasure in them , as a Souldier could not more in his armes ; nor a Ginet in his trappings , and other his rich furniture . When any doubts did arise , I did resolue them ; if they were to seeke for Plots , I did inuent them : and in all weighty businesses , I was their safegard and defence : they would hearken vnto my aduice , as to the answeres of some Oracle ; there being no man that would contradict my rules , nor withstand my lawes , nor reply to any thing that I should once determine . Those that were best practiz'd amongst them that frequented the Hospitall of Saragoca , and Guadalupe came short of me ; though I vs'd the trade but now and then , like the intermissions of an Ague : for , when all things else fail'd mee , and that I knew not what shift to make , I had this , my fiue finger for a helpe , this did neuer forsake mee in the time of neede : it was sure money in my purse , and stucke as close to my necke , as my Lord Embassadors chaine did , which a long time escaped many a faire danger . The trade of thieuing was as proper to me , as laughing is proper to man ; nay , I had almost said , that it was as a Character not to bee blotted out , such deepe impression had it taken in my soule . But when I did not exercise the same , it was not any want of good will ; for that was euer ready , and at hand .

I , and Sayavedra went out of Milan well lined , and better prouided of all things that were needfull for our iourney : so that there was no man but would Guzman goes for Milan . haue taken mee for a very rich man , and one of note and quality . But how many Prouerbe . bee there that might very well haue said , Sit downe d d Come , mangas , que a vosotras es la fiesta . Gallants , and fall to ; for this feast is prouided for you . For , as a mans apparell is , so e e ●…gan a cada vno , como lo ven t●…atado . Good cloathes recommend a man more then knowledge . is his esteeme : And they that know not a man otherwise , make their censure according to Prouerbe . his cloathes . If thou wert Cicero himselfe , and shouldst goe ill clad , thou shouldst be no longer Cicero , at least a scuruy Cicero , whom the world would scorne , and count a mad man . For there is no other wisedome , nor learning in the world , then the hauing of so much more wealth , and so much more land then another man . And he that is not so , may like a dog , goe shake his eares without doors : he is like money that is not currant ; he passes not for any thing where-soeuer hee come . They will neither offer thee a chaire to sit downe , nor giue thee the vpper hand , when they shal see thee without a feather , though thou bee rich apparelled with vertue and knowledge ; but of such now a dayes , there is little or no reckoning made . But if thou bee gloriously set out , and richly suted , though thou be neuer so base a Groome , euery mans eye is vpon thee , euery mans hat ready to honour thee . Bee thou as base and vile as any dunghill ; yet if it bee couered ouer with greene grasse , many will set themselues downe vpon it , and there recreate and refresh themselues . But Catulus was not of this Catulus his saying of Nonius . minde ; who when hee saw Nonius riding in a triumphant Chariot , stickt not to say , what a deale of dung doth this Cart carry ? Giuing vs thereby to vnderstand , that dignities doe not grace the vicious . But there are now but few Catuls , though there bee many Nonii . Nay , wert thou but good Alchimie , that shall bee adored in thee , because of its glorious and gaudy glittering . Men doe iudge now more by the eye , then the eare ; by what they see , then by what they heare : the outside is more looked on , then the inside looked into : a rich rayment sounds louder then a good report . No man considers what thy knowledge is , but what thy wealth is : they talke not so much of thy vertue , as of thy purse : and of thy purse , not what thou hast in it , but what thou spendest out of it . I was well appointed , well apparelled , and g owne fowre inches thicke , with other folkes f f The Spanish word is Enxundia Adeps porcinus , interior pinguedo porci inueterata . Also ; lo gordo , que las 〈◊〉 tienen en la ouera . fat .

When I came to Genoa , they knew not in my Lodging what cheere to make mee , nor how to please mee in my diet , I was growne so dainty and so curious . I then began to call to minde the first entrance that I made into that Citie , and Guzman arriues a●… Genoa . in how different a manner I was there receiued ; and how I was forced from thence , carrying my Crosse vpon my shoulders ; and how now they receiue mee , spreading their cloakes on the ground . Wee alighted , and fell to our victuals . That day I was willing to take mine ease , and to rest my selfe after my iourney . The next morning I apparelled my selfe , à lo Romano , no Romane of them all could weare a fairer Cloake , & Sotana , in which I walked vp and downe the streets . All mens eyes were cast vpon mee , as well for that I was a stranger , as likewise in regard I was well clad , and of a presence not to be despised . They askt my seruant , who I was ? Hee told them , Don Iuan de Guzman , a Gentleman of Seuilla : And when I heard them inquire after mee , The effects of Pride and Vain-glory . I would pop vp my head , stretching out my necke , some what more then ordinary , thinking with my selfe , that I had some ten pound weight of Bread more in my Belly , then I had before : so Peacocke-like was I blowne vp with Pride , and such store of this puffe-past of vaine-glory had I swallowed downe my throat . Hee told them that I was newly come from Rome . They demanded farther of him , if I were rich ; because they saw me come from thence in a differing fashion from the rest : for they that goe to the Court of Rome , and to other Princes Courts , are like vnto those that go to the warres , who thinke The fruits of following the Court and Wars . all the world must now bee theirs , and that they haue already finished what they went for ; with which vaine hopes they vsing to flatter themselues ; they lash out into extraordinary expences vpon the way , as likewise in the Court ; till the Court leaues them so curtail'd , that they haue scarce ere a ragge left them to couer their breech ; returning home afterwards , weary in their bodies , poore in their purses , discontented in their mindes , and driuen to that extreame want , that they must either almost starue or begge their bread . They goe thither fresh and liuely , flush of money , and rich in cloathes ; whom I can liken to nothing better , then to the fish called the Tunny ; which , when it is full of spawne , is also full of fish , fat and faire to see to , and is very good meate ; but when her Spawne is gone from her , shee turnes lanke , leane , and vnseasonable ; prouing as vnprofitable to the stomacke , as it is vnpleasing to the Palate .

They likewise enquired of him , whether I were to continue there for any long time , or past onely along as a Traueller , taking it in my way . To all which questions , Sayavedra gaue such answers , as I could my selfe haue wisht : Telling them that I was the only sonne of a widow-gentle-woman , of very good quality , being a wonderfull wealthy dame , which was wife to a certain Gentleman of Genoa , and that I was come thither to expect certaine Letters and dispatches , and then to returne backe againe to Rome ; and that in the interim , I would recreate my selfe here in Genoa , taking much pleasure in the sight of this stat●…ly City ; for that I knew not when I should make my returne , nor for what part , or whither I should euer haue the like opportunity to see it againe . The Inne , where I lay , was the best in all the Towne , and is commonly called , L'Hosteria di santa Marta , whither the most part of your Noblemen , and Gentlemen did vsually resort . There wee remained , making merry , and spending our money , without doing our selues any g g The Spanish phrase 〈◊〉 , Sin besar , y tocar , en cosa d●… prouecho . good at all in point of profit , nor did we as yet goe about it . And in keeping thus our ground , wee came to gaine ground . The Clocke doth not alwayes strike , but staies till its houre comes , and when by a little and a little the time creepes on , that is limited thereunto , why then it strikes . I playd now and then , but not for much money , with some other guests , that were in the house , more for company sake , and to passe away the time , then any thing else , not vsing any other helpe then mine owne fortune , and skill in gaming ; Sayavedra had now no hand in the businesse , nor did I vse to set his plough a worke , saue in deepe and fat grounds , where there was hope of a plentifull haruest ; I kept him for Holidayes , his attendance was , when there was a great feast , and a full boord ; but for such poore pittances as these , not worth the sitting downe for , I was well content hee should spare his labor . For , when the losings or the gettings could not be much , the best course then ( me thought ) was to proceed plainly and sincerely . Yet , The common course amongst gamesters . when I plaid small game , I went along with a leaden foot , marking and obseruing this , and that other Card ; and if Fortune did not fauour me , and that my crosse-carding was such , that I could not light on a lucky encounter , I would giue off with a little losse : but if the wind blew faire , and that I found good fortune was comming towards me , I neuer left following my good lucke , till I had swept vnto me all the money on the boord .

And it so fell out , that hauing one day wonne a matter of a hundred Crowns , and somewhat more , it was a Captaines hap , that had the command of a Gally , to sit by me , who I perceiu'd , lik't very well of my manner of play , and was very glad that I had got the money ; and reading in his lookes , that he had no great store of Crownes in his purse , but was rather in extreame want and necessity , I gaue him sixe Doblones of two , which in that coniuncture , considering his pouerty , seemed vnto him to be sixe thousand .

There is a time , when one single Royall , is more to a man then a hundred ; nay a thousand perhaps at another time , will not doe him so much good . For the which he made me such a thankfull acknowledgement , as if the fauour I had done him , had beene much more then it was , or some matter of greater moment . And this fell out very happily for me ; for hauing afterwards vnderstood from him-selfe , of what disease he was sicke , and where his griefe lay , at that instant , was mine owne remedy likewise represented vnto me , and quickly found out , that I was to make him the needle that must knit my net . In a word , I effected what I desired . He spends nothing , who buyes that he hath need of . I distributed likewise some few Crownes amongst the rest of the standers by , to make them the better deuoted , and affectioned towards mee , and that I might leaue euery man well pleas'd and contented . Insomuch , that by this my affable , franke and bountifull carriage , I grew into that credit and good opinion amongst them , that I had wonne their hearts , and got the good w●…ll and loue of all men ; and it is an old saying , That hee that sowes h h Quien bien siemora , bien coge . well , Prouerbe . reapes well . And I can assure you , that as many as conuersed with me , would haue hazarded their liues for me , if need had beene . Wherewith I found my selfe so iocond , my body so lightsome , my heart so comforted , my blood so cleare , and my spirits so quickned , that my cheekes were as fresh , and red as the Rose , and mine eyes did sparkle , and lookt so merrily , as if they had laught for ioy .

This Captaine was called Fauelo ; not that this was his proper name , but because it was giuen him by a certaine Mistresse of his , whom hee sometimes serued ; which he was willing still to retaine in remembrance of her beauty , and his owne misfortune ; the whole story whereof , hee at large related vnto me ; as how dearly she loued him , how much she made of him , indearing the sweetnesse of her disposition , her gentle behauiour , and the gracefulnesse of her person ; all which commendable qualities , poysoned with some vaine and false appearances , were drowned in the end by a desperate torment of iealousie , and such other beastly thoughts , as are still waiting vpon it . And from that time forward , he would neuer suffer me to be alone , but was for the most part continually with me , and did embrace my friendship with the greatest loue that could be . Whereupon , I intreated him , that he would be pleased to make vse of my person , if I might be any way seruiceable vnto him , and to be my guest , and take such fare as I had , and though I knew I did bid him to his losse , as keeping a better Table of his owne , yet for my sake , and the contentment I should take therein , he ought in courtesie to accept of it . I omitted no meanes , for the obliging of him vnto me , and the continuing of him still to bee my friend . He had me along with him to his Galley , feasted me , and made me take my pleasure in her , all along the coast , plowing daily such deepe furrowes for the better taking root of this our new friendship and acquaintance , that if mine had gone on in the true course of vertue , there it might haue found a Hauen wherein to haue harbourd it selfe . But I was made of nothing but fraud and deceit . Yet would I be alwayes laying a firme foundation , that might well haue seru'd for the raising of a better building : but at last it came all to nothing ; being ( like that foolish builder ) who knew better how to beginne , then to make an end of his building . Wee did communicate many particular accidents and secrets each to other , but hee came not within my shirt , he had not pierced into my bosome , Sayavedra onely kept the key of that Cabinet , and none but hee knew the secrets of my soule .

This Favelo was of a good behauiour , witty , discreet , valiant , patient , and yet full of mettall , qualities well befitting so valiant a Captaine , and so amorous a Souldier , by meanes whereof he liu'd alwayes in want . And it is a common mis-fortune that accompanies these good qualities , that they are still wayted on by pouerty ( or to speake more properly ) by beggery . Now I , who was not ignorant of his wants , sought in all that I could to releeue his necessities , and to free him from these his extremities , that thereby I might bind him the surer vnto me . I carryed my selfe so fairly and so cunningly , both with him , and as many as I conuersed withall , that ( like Hawkes ) I made them all to stoope to my lure . And within a few dayes , my name and credit was so good amongst them , that I could battle largely vpon it , and might haue receiued any courtsie in that City , if I had beene willing to make vse thereof . Whereupon , partly out of this , and partly the ancient desire that I had to know something concerning my selfe , lest the not knowing of it , might make me take thought , and so sicken , and dye of griefe ; considering with my selfe , that being in that good state I now was in , a handsome young fellow , well clad , good parts , and a good purse , no man whatsoeuer could hold it any disparagement vnto him , to acknowledge mee for his kinsman ; but that which did most sway with me , Guzman begins to thinke vpon the reuenge he meant to take of his kinsman . was the earnest desire that I had to be fully reuenged of him , who had abused me in that base manner . This did often trouble me ; nor could I sleepe in quiet , as oft as I thought vpon it .

I had not staid long in towne , but I found out a father and a mother , and came to know all my kindred . Those , which before threw stones at mee , as if I had beene some strange curre , whom they would chase out of their doores , did beginne now to quarrell , who should haue me first home to his house , who make mee greatest cheere , who giue me the noblest entertainment , one seeking to out-vye another . The very first day that I made this enquiry , my kindred was more ( I imagine ) then my credit , and might be better knowne then trusted amongst them ; for no man is ashamed to owne a rich man for his kinsman , though hee be vicious and ill giuen ; but all flye from a vertuous man , if they once haue him in the winde , and finde that he stinkes of pouerty , I need not to indeare this poynt vnto you , it is so common a thing .

Riches , is like vnto fire , which albeit it belong to a different place , and is Riches compared to fire . onely prouided for one particular roome , yet notwithstanding as many as come neere vnto it , warme themselues , though they take not so much as a coale Prouerbe . from thence ; and i i Mas fuego , mas calor . the more fire , the more heate . How many shall you see warming them-selues by the fire in a rich mans hall ? of whom , if you shall but aske what they make there , or what 's their businesse ? They will answer you ; No great businesse . Doe they perhaps giue me any thing ? Alas , what doest thou get , by curring fauour with them , by soothing them vp , by crowching and creeping vnto them , by assisting day and night in base and seruile offices , mis-spending that time , which thou mightst better bestow in gaining thy meate else-where ? It is true Sir , that I benefit my selfe here but little , yet can I not choose , but come and warme my selfe at Sennor N. house , as others doe . You , and such others as you be , tell me I pray , what you are ? and be not angry with me , if I plainly tell you , you are all fooles .

But to returne againe into our way . Many of my kindred came vnto mee , euery one desiring to make himselfe better knowne vnto me , and offering his seruice in such complementall manner , as was befitting my fashion ; and there was one amongst the rest , who for to honor , and oblige me the more , did challenge ancient kindred of me , euen from our great grand-fathers . I would , for curiosities sake , faine know , what was become of that good old man , which put that former tricke vpon me ; and that I might doe it without any the least suspition or iealousie in the world , I demanded of them , whether my father had any more brothers ? or if hee had , whether any of them were yet aliue , or no ? For , I was euer of the minde , that he that plaid the rogue with me , was my Vnckle . They told me , yes . That there were three of them in all , my Father , and two more : and that the middle most was dead , but that the eldest of all was liuing , and that he dwelt here in the Citie . They told me that he had liu'd a bachelor all the dayes of his life , that he was a man of great meanes , and the top of all our kindred , and gaue such particular tokens of him , whereby I came to know him . I said that I would goe kisse his hands the next day : But when this was told him , and that hee vnderstood of my qualitie , albeit he were very old , he came trudg●…ng with his st●…ffe in his hand , as decrepit as he was , to visit me , accompanyed with some of the chiefest of our linage . I knew him as soone as euer I saw him , though he was now growne very lame and aged . I was glad to see him , but sory that hee was so old , I could haue wisht him much younger , that he might the longer haue felt the smart of those ierkes , that I was resolued to bestow on him . I count that man a foole , who to reuenge himselfe of his enemy , will take away his life ; for that being ended , all his paine is ended with it . When I would take a reuenge , I would handle it so , as I did with these my kinsmen , that they may not forget it as long as they liue , but beare the wofull remembrance of it with them to their graues . I desired to be reuenged of this man , and wisht that hee had beene at least in the same state as I left him , that I might in the same , haue paid him the debt I ow'd him : who had without any cause or reason in the world , vs'd mee so vnworthily . He made mee many offers of his house ; the very naming onely whereof , made my bloud to boyle in my brest .

Now ( me thought ) the Bats were fluttering about mine eares , that the Gnats began to sting me , and that from vnderneath the bed , crept out those old Hob-gobblins , and fire-spitting deuils , which tormented mee heretofore . No , no ; once was enough of this iest ; I would bite no more at this bait . The Cat hath Prouerbe . k k Vna fue , y ●…leuosela el gato . I cannot find whether this vna isr ser'd , and therefore reserre it to others to find it out . cozened me once , and is gone away with her prey , but she shall serue mee so no more . I shall take heede of her against another time . Marry , I said to my selfe ; Onely Sayavedra , may put another tricke vpon me , but it will not bee much for his profit . But ( excepting him ) let any man else deceiue mee the second time , and I will freely forgiue him .

We talked of many things ; and amongst diuers other questions , he demanded of me , if I had beene heretofore in Genoa ? Are you thereabouts ( thought I ; ) I shall watch you well enough for that , you shall not catch me with thie trap , as old and crafty as you be . So ( lying at my close fights ) I answered him , that I had not ; onely I told him , that much about some three yeares since , that I past this way , but could not ( though I would ) stay longer then one night , because I was going in great haste to Rome , vpon pretension of a certaine benefice . This Story you shall find , more a●… large , in the first Part , first Chapt. an the third Book . Then he told me , with a great deale of pause & deliberation , dreaming perhaps that he had lighted on a story that should please me wonderfull well , Some seuen yeares agoe , little more or lesse , there came hither ( my good Cozen ) to this towne , a little roguish boy ; whom none that saw him , but would haue taken him to be a thiefe , or at least a young disciple of theirs ; who , that hee might the more easily rob me , came to my house , giuing mee some particular signes and tokens of my brother , that is now in glory ; as also of your mother ; telling me , that hee was his sonne , and my nephew ; This is true that I tell you ( Cozen ) thus , and in this manner came he vnto me : but hee lookt so like a Rogue , and we had that suspition of him , that not owning him for our kinsman , lest his infamy might reflect vpon our family , and turne to our disgrace , we sought to make him leaue this Citie , and so he did , by meanes of a pretty plot which we had deuised for him . I can assure you ( Cozen ) that hee went flying from hence , like a dog that hath a bladder , with some few rattling pibles in it , tide to his tayle ; we could neuer more set sight on him , nor doe we know whether he be dead or aliue , as if the earth had then swallowed him vp quicke . With the leualtos & high-bounding capers that he cut , flying finely in the aire , with no other help then a Couerlet , without the which , ( you know ) your tumblers cannot handsomely doe their feates of actiuity ; I very well remember that he left my bed , ( whether out of feare , or what other accident I know not ) full of honey-combes . This iest prou'd a very good one ; for fearing ( if he staid any longer here ) to haue a worse put vpon him , hee got him packing , and so we were fairly rid of him . And I cannot choose but laugh , as oft as I thinke vpon it : For questionlesse this Rogue had a purpose to deceiue vs . But I beleeue he will remember this nights lodging ( if he be yet aliue ) the longest day that he hath to liue . And I haue beene often angry with my selfe , and haue beshrewd my fingers a thousand times ouer and ouer , that I vs'd him no worse .

All that liad formerly past , he related vnto me very solemnly , omitting no one circumstance : As the contriuing of the plot , his making him goe supperlesse to bed ( supposing that might haue holpe to saue his sheets ) and which was worse then all the rest , his tossing in a blanket .

I poore man , that was this little rogue that had suffered all this , and had receiued such hard measure from them , apprehended it so feelingly , as if I had beene afraid I should haue gone to this geare againe : My flesh did breake out ( me thought ) into chops ; and like the wound of a murtherd man , did open of it selfe , and began to bleed afresh , ( vpon the hearing of this tale ) as if the murderer were present . And albeit , I sensibly perceiued in my selfe , that the colour of my face did receiue some alteration , hauing changed its naturall hew , yet did I dissemble it the best that I could ; and then , euen then at that very instant , did I whet the razor of my reuenge . Not so much moued thereunto , out of my former hunger , that I had to doe it ; as this his present boasting , what fine feats he had done ; seeming to take a pride and a glory in doing an vndeserued mischiefe . For I hold it a greater sinne ( and doubtlesse so it is ) to boast an ill , then to doe it . I did itch all the while this tale was on foot , and knew not which way to looke , nor what to say . At last I said vnto him ; I can not call to minde , who this youth should be that did so earnestly long to haue honourable parents ; yet are we beholding vnto him , ( if haply he be aliue , and haue escaped with life from Ronçesvalles ) that of all other noble Houses ( whereof there are so many in the world ) he would vouchsafe to make choyce of ours , to honour himselfe there withall . And if such another stripling as he , should chance to come to my house , I would show him all the kindnesse I could , till I had fally inform'd my selfe of the truth , and had assured knowledge , whether he came vnto me out of an euill , or good intent . For there are some Cases , and so me such strange and vnexpected casualties , whereunto mans courses are incident , that euen persons , of great , both worth and valour , escape in that miraculous manner , and are by their misfortunes , brought to that low ebbe , that they are asham'd of them-selues . But this wag , when I had sifted and sounded him throughly , and found out his intent , I would haue dealt with him , as hee would haue dealt with mee : For Pouertie neither quits Vertue , nor Riches giue it . And in case it should not haue fallen out as my suspitious thoughts had suggested it , and that ( for ought I saw ) he had no euill intention towards me , nor any purpose to doe me any harm , I should haue fauourd him all that I could , and haue secretly dismist him from me . And in a word , though hee had not beene my kinsman , yet for the good choice that he made , and the good liking he had to our name , preferring it before any other , surely hee should not haue fared the worse for that . And if I had not giuen him any money in his purse , yet would I at least haue vs'd him ciuilly , and not sent him away discontented , who ( as it should seeme by him ) was not very well pleased with his entertainment . Goe to , goe to , ( Cozen ) ( said the oldman ) had you seene him , as I did , you would haue told me another tale then now you do . And for mine own part , ( I must confesse vnto you ) it did me good at the heart , that I had thus firkt my young Rogue ; and ( as I told you before ) I am very sory that I did not handle him worse , and giue him that condigne punishment , which the heynousnesse of the offence did deserue . For you neuer saw such a tatterd Rascall as he was in all your life ; and being thus all to be rent and torne , and not a ragge ( sauing your reuerence ) to couer his breech , yet this shake-rag , this young impudent Rogue , did not sticke to challenge kindred of vs , and that hee was lineally descended of our house , and in so neare a degree , as you haue heard . And because he brought not his wedding garment with him , but was thus poore and basely clad , we gaue him Iacke Drums entertainment , and shut him out of doores , hauing lapt him first in a blanket , where hee was handsomely canuast ; and with this he went his way . Iust about the same time ( said I ) was I with my mother in Sevill . And it 's not yet full three yeere since I left her . I was their onely sonne , nor had my parents any other children saue my selfe . It was euen at my tongues end , and almost out of my mouth ere I was aware , that I had two fathers ; but quickly mending that fault , I went on , as followeth : My father left me well to liue , being neither so much , as there-with to be able to spend lauishly ; nor yet so little , that with good gouernment , I might not liue handsomely . I cannot boast my selfe to be rich , nor iustly complaine that I am poore . Besides , my mother was alwayes a prudent and prouident woman , well gouern'd , a small waster , and a great huswife .

All they that were there present , were willing to giue me the hearing , and were wondrous glad of it , not well knowing in what Sanctuary they might place me , nor how sufficiently to feast me , nor could they satisfie them-selues in point of good manners , if they did not giue me the right hand , and being two , if they did not put me in the l l The middle place esteemed in Spaine , to be the best . midst betweene them both . Then did I softly say to my selfe ; O vanity , whither wilt thou ? how doest thou runne after those that are fortunate , as long as they saile with a faire wind . But when that fayles thee , how in a moment doe thy friends forsake thee , how many changes doest thou find in an instant ? And how truly , did I now come to know that they are euermore fauoured and resp●…cted , from whom any hope may bee had , that one way or other , they may be benefited by them ? and this is the reason why few doe helpe the needy , and all runne after the rich .

We are the children of pride , and rather flatterers then friends . For if wee were true friends indeed , and were charitably minded , wee would haue recourse to the contrary . Especially , we knowing how acceptable a thing it is in the sight of God , that euery one should be as sensible of his neighbours miseries , as his owne , seeking to doe the same good vnto him , as we would haue to be done vnto our selues , were wee in the same wretched case , as he is . I was now become the idoll of my kindred , so much was I adored by them . I had bought me at an m m A publike out crie : Or an open sale of goods at the second hand . Almoneda , a faire Cupboord of plate , which cost mee almost eight hundred Ducats ; and for no other end in the world , but to close vp this my wound the better , I inuited all my kindred together , with some other of my friends one day to dinner , I made them a great feast , bestow'd a costly banket vpon them , cheared them all vp , made wonderfull much of them , and gaue them all the kinde entertainment I could possibly deuise . After dinner , wee goe to play , I get the money , but gaue it almost all away in barato to the standers by . And with this coniuring tricke thus I carried them through the Ayre , I was able to doe what I would doe with them . O that I could haue then whispered them softly in the eare , and haue told them ; Know ( Gentlemen ) that Prouerbe . you feed vpon your owne flesh ; that the n n En el hato , està el lobo . wolfe is in the midst of your flocks ; and that hee , whom they make so much of , is hee , whom they so much wronged . O , if they did but know so much , how would they blesse them selues , what a world of crosses would they make in euery corner of their houses , that they might not be troubled with a double labour all the dayes of their life after to doe the same thing againe , a thousand and a thousand times ouer ? For now their mattresses were a quilting , and their beds a making , wherein they were like to take but little rest , and fetch more friscalls in the ayre , then when they tost mee in the blanket ; so that they shall haue as good cause to thinke vpon mee , as I vpon them ; and remember one another the better as long as wee liue . But my paine was already past ; and theirs was now comming vpon them . O , if they but knew , that he that is thus with them in sheeps-cloathing , shall ere long breake sodainly in vpon them , like a roaring and raging lyon , how would they looke one vpon another ? But it is well as it is ; for ere they and I part , we will quit scores , and make them to know me a little better , and what it is to abuse one in that manner as they did me , and to scorne and despise their owne blood . It is a fine stale , or call , to take a bird withall , to haue a good eoram vobis , to spend brauely , to goe gallantly , and to be a Don Iuan de Guzman ; but it had beene better for them , that I had beene poore Guzman de Alfarache with his tatterd cloathes , then Don Iuan de Guzman in all his gallantry . They vs'd me with a great deale of courtesie , and gaue me very kinde entertainment , but because I had a queazy stomacke , and was troubled with many qualmes , like a woman that is a breeding , out of that longing desire that I had to be reuenged , nothing would downe with me , or if it did , it would make no stay , but I should presently puke it vp againe . For in such cases , a mans thoughts are euer of a bad digestion ; it being the nature of iniuries , not to be easily concocted . So that I did continually beat my braines about it , plodding with my selfe how I should best effect it ; and in this vertuous exercise had I set my wits a working , and all these my noble entertainments tended to no other end then this . For Inanis potentia , quae non reducitur ad actum . it had beene great folly in me , to haue made such great preparation to no purpose . And vnprofitable is that power , which is not reduced to act . I did but Prouerbe . wait for a happy coniuncture , for euery thing hath its o o Cada cosa , tiene su quando . quando , it s when it should be done . For we cannot execute all things , at all times . Besides there are some houres that are vnlucky , some starres that are crosse , and some planets that are malignant ; whose contagious breath we are to flie from , and keepe our selues aloofe from their infectious ayre , lest they chance to worke our destruction .

Thus then did I leysurely stay , looking for a fit occasion , passing those dayes that I remained there , in feasting and banquetting , and all other delightfull pleasures ; one while walking downe to the Sea-side , to take the fresh ayre ; otherwhiles , going to recreate my selfe in their sweet and pleasant Gardens , which are very curiously kept ; and now and then visiting the faire Dames of Genoa .

My Kinsmen , would faigne haue made mee to marry a Gentlewoman of Prouerbe . very good quality , but of a small Dowry : but I durst not venture vpon her , for the reasons before recited : and being besides to steale away from thence very shortly , our egges p p A●…s de dar con los hueuo●… en la ceniza . must haue beene buried in the ashes ; yet did I shew my selfe very thankfull vnto them for these their good wishes towards mee ; neither accepting , nor refusing their offer , that I might goe entertaining and leading them along till I had hit the marke that I aymed at . For , certaine it is , that a man may then easiliest knock out his enemies braines , when his aduersary thinkes there is no such treachery intended against him , and rests most secure . And here will wee rest a while .

CHAP. IX .

Guzman de Alfarache robs his Vncle and Kinsmen in Genoa , and imbarkes him selfe in the Gallies that were to goe for Spaine .

AN iniury , neuer ought to bee slighted ; nor he sleepe that does it . For Reuenge comes vp from beneath the earth , lurking in the secret corners thereof , Touching Reuenge . lying still in Ambush , watching but a fit time to Pro●…erbe . sally forth ; and to doe thee a mischiefe . The a a De donde no piens●…n , ●…uele saltar laliebre . hare oftentimes starts out of that bush , where wee did least dreame of his sitting . Let not the rich man trust in his riches ; nor the powerfull man in the greatnesse of his power ; nor the strong man , in his strength ; nor the valiant man , in his courage : for Time alters the state of things , and turnes them topsie-turuy . A little hayre in a Pen , makes a great blot ; and a little stone in the way , ouerturnes a great Waine . And when the Offender thinks himselfe most secure ; then the offended finds the better opportunitie . I haue told you here-tofore , that Reuenge Reuenge a womanish affection . is base Cowardise , which springs from a weake womanish minde ; to which kinde of Creatures it is commonly competible , and sutes best with them . And albeit I haue mentioned some , nay many vnto you , that haue made their names immortall , by scorning and contemning of it ; yet here I shall not omit to tell you a story of a woman , wherein shee well shew'd that she was a woman .

A Gentlewoman , that was young , faire , rich , and of a noble linage , being A Story how a wronged Gentlewoman reuenged the iniury that was done vnto her . married to a Gentleman , in euery respect equall vnto her selfe , chanced within a short time after to become a widdow : who discreetly considering the dangers , whereinto by reason of her tender yeares , shee was like to fall , and what speeches the world is wont to cast out , through a too much aptnesse that men haue to whisper and murmur strange tales : for euery man iudgeth so of things as they represent themselues to his imagination ; and as hee is instructed by his priuate either fancy or affection ; and taking notice of one onely action of this or that man or woman , it is a common practice amongst them , to varry their opinions thereupon , and giue their seuerall censures . And yet not alwayes doe these tongues of theirs speake the truth ; nor their iudgements hit vpon the right . She , holding it therefore very inconuenient to put these deare pledges of hers , vpon the tips of mens tongues , and to occasion her honour to come in question ; shee resolued ( as on the lesser euill ) to marry . Two Gentlemen became Suters vnto her , both equall in their pretension ; but farre vnequall in their deseruing . The one , to his as much content , as his heart could desire , the match being in a manner concluded ; but the other reiected and quite cast off , running a contrary fortune to his Corriuall . And besides , that hee was not of that ranke and quality as the other , hee had likewise some other defects , which might very well excuse a woman of farre meaner indowments , to admit him to bee her Companion . Now , the former being made sure to this Gentlewoman , and hauing past their promises each to other ; so that nothing was wanting but their going to Church , and there to performe those Ceremonies , and Solemnities in that case required . The second , seeing his hopes dasht , and his sute at an end , and that there was no recouering of her ; for that shee was already betrothed to the other : a diuellish toy tooke him sodainly in the head , by peruerse and indirect meanes , to fetch such a leape , as should put him-selfe forward , and cast the other behinde .

Hee resolued with him-selfe to rise vp one day very early in the morning , which he did accordingly ; and hauing hid him-selfe in a secret place , where no body could see him , there did he lie close , till such time as the seruants of the house had opened this betrothed Gentlewomans doores ; and then presently taking his time , without being heard or perceiued by any , he steps mee in , and there stayes mee a pretty while behind the porch , till such time , as to his seeming , the people were stirring in the streets , and all the rest of the houses and shops were open . And then faigning to come out of the Gentlewomans house , as if he had lyen there all night , he stands strutting him-selfe vpon the midst of the threshold before the doore , with his sword clapt vnder his arme , making show as if he were setting and ordering his Ruffe , and buttoning vp the buttons of his Doublet ; so that as many as past by and obserued the manner of his carriage , did verily beleeue , that hee was espoused vnto her , and had now inioyed this Gentlewoman .

When this plot of his fell out thus handsomely , that for his purpose hee could not haue wisht it to haue taken better effect : this businesse was whispered of at first by a few ; but afterwards spred it selfe by degrees , and came to be diuulged all ouer the street , till at last the noyse thereof entred into her owne priuate chamber . This tricke had hee played twice ouer . And this businesse was so publikely talked of , and the Gentlewoman growne thereby so infamous , that it was the Table-talke of all the Towne : euery man admiring this her inconstancy , and wondring at her indiscretion , that shee should forgoe her first bargaine , being so aduantageous for her owne good , and make choice of this other , whom she had formerly cast off , and not without cause . But when this newes was thus scattered euery where abroad , and euery mans mouth was full of the manner of it ; as that hee was seene to come out halfe naked , all vndrest , and his points vntrust : when this ( I say ) came to the knowledge of her otner Suiter , hee did so risent the wrong she had done him , was so ouercharged with sorrow , and so inflamed with choller , that albeit he lou'd her before so tenderly , that he desired nothing more then to make her his wife ; now did hee cruelly hate her ; flying now as fast from her , as before hee sought after her : and did not onely abhorre her : but all other women for her sake : it seeming vnto him ; That since shee , whom he so much esteemed , and so dearely loued , accounting her so good , so chaste , and so reserued a creature , that shee should commit so foule a fact , there was little hope of faith to be found in the rest : and if there were a●…y left on whose loyalty men might trust and relye , they were so few , that hee despaired of meeting with that happinesse . Hee weighed their inconstancies , their delayings , their passions , and with them the dangers , the troubles , and the cares wher●…into men put them selues . And passing from these to other discourses which he made with him-selfe , inspired by God , they wrought so vpon him , that hee changed the loue of the creature , into that of ●…he Creator , resoluing with him-selfe to turne Fryer . Which deliberation , hee putting in execution , sodainly entred into a religious Order . This came to the Gentlewomans knowledge , and with it , the rep●…rt that ●…an other , as also the occasion of it , who , wh●…n shee saw how things stood , and that it was not possible for her to repaire her honour ; nor to take away that foule blo●… which the other had laid vpon i●… , shee tooke-on like a mad woman : and how can you blame her , that she should thus lose her selfe in her passions ; hauing lost at one blow , her honour , her Husband , her preferment , and her chiefest happinesse ? hopelesse for euer , eyther by this , or any other the like meanes , to receiue any future content , or to returne to the former state wherein shee stood , or to recouer her reputation , which was thus shamefully lost .

Whereupon shee began to bethinke her selfe , how shee might salue this her innocency by some exemplary punishment . And hauing summ'd and cast vp these reckonings with her selfe , shee found her honesty so deeply ingaged , that it was impossible by any other course but this , to cleare it : and that such a treachery as this , could not be quitted , then with one on lesse treacherous , though more cruell . Whereupon , shee did put on so infernall a fury , and went on in that violent rage , that shee busied her thoughts in nothing else , saue how she might bring this businesse about . God bee mercifull vnto vs , and deliuer vs from a wronged womans reuenge ; for all of them are commonly such as she , who here presents her-selfe vnto vs .

The first thing that shee resolued on , was to vse her best endeauour to become a Nunne ; ( and if shee had stopt there , shee had spunne a good thred ) and imparting a great part of her troubles to an especiall friend of hers , that was of that Monastery , whither she had determined to goe , after shee had broken her minde vnto her ; shee , with great secrecy , effected her desire . Then did shee conuey into the Monastery , all the chierest of her houshold-stuffe , her Iewels , and her monies , annexing thereunto , by publike conueyances and instruments drawne and signed for that vse , the greatest part of her wealth . This being done , she stood daily expecting , that this Gentleman her enemy , should come and renue his suite , and treate with her , touching their mariage ; which ( according to her expectation ) within some few dayes after , hee did : alleadging in his excuse , the great loue that hee bare vnto her ; for which cause , being desperate of his hopes , hee vsed those subtill meanes , that he might obtaine the end of his wished desires . But now , acknowledging his fault , and that hee had beene the cause of this error , that was voyced abroad , crauing pardon for the same , he was willing to solder vp this flawe , by tendring himselfe to bee her husband . Shee , who desired nothing more , then that this his wicked intention should come to light , and that her honor thereby mig●…t recouer its former splendor , made answer vnto him ; That seeing there was now no other meanes left vnto her for the saluing of her credit , nor no better course to bee taken for the recouery of her lost reputation ; she did willingly accept of his offer . But told him withall , that shee had made a vow , the performance whereof would be accomplished within these two months , or little more , and vntill that time were expired , shee could not giue him that satisfaction which hee desired . But , if hee would bee pleased to haue the patience to stay till then , hee should obtaine his suite . But , if hee were so eagerly bent vpon the businesse , that impatient of so long an intermission of time , he longed to come sooner to this his desired end , shee would not stop him in this his iourney ; but would haue the businesse to be carryed with all possible secrecy , till the terme of the aforesaid two moneths should be fully accomplished ; and then afterwards shee did not care ( leauing that to his discretion ) how soone this their mariage were manifested to the world .

The Gentleman accepted of the condition , holding himselfe ( therein ) the happiest man in the world . And hauing prouided all that was fitting and necessary for a businesse of this nature , they were secretly contracted together , by vertue whereof , they were espoused each to other . They continued together on these termes some few dayes , hee entertaining himselfe with that assured hope which hee had of his absolute inioying of her , and she being no lesse contented then hee , with the wished end that shee had to worke her reuenge .

One night , after they had supt , her husband went to bed , shee enters into the chamber , and setting her selfe downe neare vnto the bed-side , feigning to be busying her fingers about some trifling worke or other , ( as women are neuer without a thousand such idle toyes ) she waited by him , till he was falne asleepe , and when she saw that the soundnesse of his first sleepe had seazed forcibly vpon him , she softly puts her hand into the sleeue of her gowne , and taking out a keene cutting knife , as sharpe as any raysour , to that first sleepe of his , she added the last minute of his life ; for in an instant she had cut his throat , and left him dead in the bed , wallowing in his owne blood . Afterwards , telling the people of the house , that her husband had had a very bad night of it , and that none should goe in for feare of waking him , till he himselfe were willing to call to them , or that her selfe should returne from Masse ; shee shut the doore after her , and hy'd her as fast as she could , to the Monastery , where shee presently receiued the habit and was made a Nunne , after that shee had thus washt away her infainy , with his blood , who had bespotted it , giuing a notorious token of her honesty , and a terrible demonstration of her cruelty .

I will likewise tell you ( because it suteth well to this purpose ) that which A tale of Fuctillos the soule . Fuctillos said ; a foole that went vp and downe Alcala de Henares ; one whom I afterwards very well knew . This foole , a dogge had bit by the legge , which hurt , though he was afterwards well healed of it , yet his heart was not at quiet : for he had still a spight to that dogge . Whom hee finding one day by chance lying all along before his doore , sleeping in the Sunne , he went to a certaine place neere vnto the Church of Santa Maria , and taking vp a great stone , as much as he could lift with both his hands , he came softly stealing towards the dogge , without being perceiued by him , and lifting it vp as high as euer hee could each , let it fall iust vpon the head of him . The poore Curre , hauing receiued this cruell blow , being in extreame torment , and neere vnto his death , began to make a most pittifull howling , and fell ( his last pangs being vpon him ) a bounding in the ayre . Fuctillos the foole , seeing in what case he was , said vnto him ; Doe you heare brother , doe you heare ? b b Prouerbe . Quien enemigos tiene , no duerma : He does ill to sleepe that has an enemy . I remember I told you once before ; That ill , is alwaies ill ; But of all ils , I hold reuenge to be the worst : For a Reuenge , of all ills the worst . reuengefull heart knowes not how to be mercifull . And he that shall not shew mercy , let him not looke for mercy , neither from God , nor man . For euery man shall be meted with the same measure that he meteth vnto others . And in the Prouerbe . same balance that thou weighest thy neighbour , in the same shalt thou bee Por la medido , que midiere , ha de ser medido . Trust not a reconciled enemie . weighed thy selfe . This , thou canst not deny , but I must haue thee also to confesse , That they are in an error , who knowing mens euill inclination , will yet be so simple , as to trust them ; especially those , whom we haue formerly iniured ; for few or none of your reconciled friend , but proue rotten at the heart ; and how faire a show soeuer they make , not one of them of a thousand that is sound and good . He doth offer a pleasing sacrifice vnto God , who for Gods sake onely , remitteth the wrongs that he hath receiued . Few miracles haue we seene in this case ; Only I was an eye-witnesse of one my selfe in Florence , which happened without the wals of the City , in the Church of San Miniato , that stands within the Castle . Which because it is but a short one , and worthy your memorie , I wil briefly relate it vnto you . A Gentleman of Florence , called Captaine Giouanni A story of a miracle , wrought in San in ato , and vpon what occasion . Gualberto , the son of a noble Knight , that was a Titulado , going to Florence with his Company , well armed , & on horse-back , he met vpon the way with a mortal enemy of his , who had kild his brother ; who seeing the danger wherin he was , giuing him-selfe for a lost man , ( for that he knew not how to escape him ) humbled him-selfe at his feet , and crossing his brest with his arms , besought his pardon , and that for Iesus Christs sake , that was crucified , hee would be pleased to spare him his life . Giouanni Gualberto , had these words in that veneration , that pricked with a charitable compunction , taking pitty of him , hee willingly pardoned this his enemie . And taking him along with him , he made him to goe backe againe with him to Florence , and brought him to San Miniatos Church , to offer thankes vnto God . And kneeling downe before a Crucifex , which was a very liuely peece , Giouanni Gualberto , kneeling also on his knees , desired of God , That he would so forgiue him his trespasses , as he did freely forgiue this his enemy that had trespassed against him , in killing his brother . Which words were no sooner vttered by him , but Christ bowed his head vnto him , Giouanni Gualberto , humbly acknowledging this great grace and fauour there showne vnto him in the presence of all those that were there , presently entred into a religious Order , in which holy profession , he continued to his dying day . This image of Christ stands to this day , with his head bowing it selfe downe , euen in the selfe same manner as it stood then : and is there reuerenced as a great relicke , not onely by the Florentines , but all other Catholickes .

And now ( laying Miracles aside ) let mee truly tell you , That when a man does pardon his enemie , but takes not this for his ground , it leaues some embers Of reuenge . behinde , some quicke coales couered ouer with a few ashes , which being stir'd neuer so little , breakes forth againe , inflaming the soule , and soliciting it to reuenge . And howbeit outwardly this fire seeme to bee dead ; yet God keepe vs from this still water ; for many a time and oft , this fire is onely sprinkled ouer with a little Court-holy-water , which is as good as nothing ; or sleightly couer'd ouer with the ashes of a false forgiuenesse . But if you shall but offer to blow it with Occasions bellowes , though neuer so little , it soone discouers it selfe , the coales kindle by and by , and the flames of their hatred breake forth afresh , and to as deepe a reuenge , as if there had neuer beene any atonement betweene them . And this I am able to iustifie vnto you , as hauing made experience thereof my selfe : For I was euer so mightily pricked on to reuenge , as if ( like a beast ) the spurres thereof lay still gagging at my sides . And well may I say beast , for he is no lesse , that is thus beastly-minded . I had still before mine eyes , that dis-ioynting and ratling of my bones , when like the winnowing of wheat in a fanne , they tost me vp on high , and no sooner downe , but hoist me vp againe , euery bone of mee seeming to gingle like so many bels . What with this , and that delight and pleasure that they tooke in the recounting of the iest , and the euill intent wherewithall they did it , besides their telling of me , that nothing did so much grieue them , as that they had not vs'd me worse , I could not choose but beare it in minde , and say to my selfe ; O ye misbegotten rascals , ye villaines , ye enemies to goodnesse , ye dogges : I came to your gates , being poore and needy , and what a fine refreshing did yee giue me , that I might the better goe forward on my iourney ! This their course vsage , had stir'd vp such store of choller in mee , that I did now desire nothing more , then to cry quittance with all those that had a hand in this conspiracy . And not so much to be reuenged of them , as that old dog-bolt , who was the principall plotter , and actor , both of it , and my hurt .

The time passed on , and with it I gained more friends , wedging them closer and closer daily vnto me , I knowing them , and they mee . The proposed mariage was hotly pursued by them , they all very earn●…stly desiring to haue me naturalized amongst them . I visited them , and they me : my friends resorted to my lodging , and I to theirs . Now , as if I had beene a towne-borne child , I had free accesse in all parts of the City , I went and plaid amongst them at their Ordinaries , and publike houses of gaming ; and they likewise would come and meete at my lodging ; sometimes losing , and sometimes getting , till one night amongst the rest , the Cards fell out so luckily , and shew'd themselues so fauourable vnto me , that I carried home with mee at one clap aboue seuen thousand Royals : where-with my Gentlemen were so nettled , that the Prouerbe . next night after , they were very desirous to play greater game . I misliked not the motion ; for the time of my reckning was now neare at hand , if not past ; my nine d d Yo est●… fuera de cuenta●… ò , en las nueve ●…es . monthes , ( as the common saying is ) that I had gone with child , looking to be brought a-bed of this birth , begotten of mine owne braine , were now fully expired ; and euery moment I expected a happy houre . For Captaine Favelo had already told me , that the Galleys were now ready , and that he was fully perswaded , they would very sho●…tly goe for Spaine . This made me bestirre my stumpes , and to get all things ready to goe aboord , conce●…uing they were now e e The Spanish word is Lev●… termino nautico , y vale la partid●… , y arrancada que hazen las gale as del puerto , à levando . hoysing sayle , fitting their oares , and ready to launch , being resolued , whither-soeuer they went , to goe along with them ; yet I durst not make it knowne , till going out of the hauen , they were to put forth to Sea . I accepted that night their challenge , and continued play with them , but to no other end in the world , b●…t to entertaine the time , that I might afterwards be the better prouided , to giue them a wipe for a farewell , and to tickle them with the latter arrow , or ( as they vse to doe in Portugall ) darles de pancada .

That night I lost , but no more then I was willing ; for now I did employ all my skill , to bring my purpose to passe . I did float vp and downe with a side winde , and got to winde-ward of them , still bestowing barato ( howsoeuer the world went ) vpon my old friend the Captaine ; because I knew he was to returne it backe againe in the end , to my greater aduantag●… . Some few dayes after , I perceiu'd my Captaine grew some-what sad ; I aske him what might be the cause of this his melancholy , and that he was not so merry , as he was wont to be : He told me , it was onely the sorrow , that he had conceiued , that he and I , ere long must part ; for that some ten dayes hence the Galleys were without faile to goe away , by expresse order giuen for their departure .

His words were pearles ; and this language of his , as a voyce from heauen , as if I had heard it once more say vnto me ; Open this C●…binet , vnlocke that chest , and pull out that other Cat by the eares , and carry away with thee , what thou list . So that now , I thought this businesse was in a manner quite ended . And so taking my Captaine aside , when I saw that he and I were all alone , I said vnto him ; Sir , you haue show'd your selfe such a friend vnto me , and I doe so highly esteeme of your loue and friendship , that I know not how either to indear●… , or require it . There is offe●…ed now vnto me by occasion of this your voyage , an absolute remedie to all my desires , and a fit opportunitie to effect , what I haue long since intended ; and without your helping hand , wherein it chiefly consist●… , I vtterly despaire of obtayning my purpose . And if I haue for-borne till now to giue you an account thereof ( which I ought to haue done , in regard of that true affection , and faithfull friendship , that is betweene vs ) it was because I was loth , out of my loue vnto you , to cause any disquietnesse in you , which the acquainting you therewith , must needs bring with it . I would haue you therefore to vnderstand , that I came not hither , either out of any desire to see this Citie , nor for that kinde entertainments sake , or any other courte●…e , that I haue here receiued ; but onely for to dis-oblige my selfe , and to reuenge a certaine wrong , which my father being an elderly man , receiued at the hands of a young Spaniard , that resideth herein this Citie : who was forced thereupon to forsake his Country , as being ashamed of the affront that was done him . And not being able ( in regard he was an old man ) to right himselfe as he should , he held it his best course , to lessen it by his long absence ; the griefe whereof continued with him to his dying day . And he that had no respect vnto those re●…erend hayres of my aged father , cannot iustly complaine of me , if being his sonne , I lose all respect towards him in the working of my reuenge . And because it may so fall out , that after I haue satisfied my desire , that his friends , either by the gr●… fauour they shall finde in this place , or by the strength of their purse , which is no lesse preualent , shall goe about to doe me any iniurie , that you afford me your b●…st ●…nce , by which good furtherance onely of yours , w●…thout any perill to your owne person , you may by your secrecy secure me , and bring me fairely off . Which friendly office sha●…l binde me so fast vnto you , that ( during life ) I shall acknowledge my selfe to be your slaue . For a sonne hath no more honour , then what he inherits from his father : And if my father had none to leaue me , this trayterous enemie of his , hauing taken it from him , I likewise liue without it , and must recouer it my selfe by these hands of mine , and by mine owne proper industry . Which if my kinsmen haue not sought to repayre , it was , for that they were not either willing to hazard them-selues , or their fortunes ; or for that after my fathers absence , all was buryed , and not so much as a word spoken thereof , whereby the remembrance of the wrong might haue beene reuiued . Holding it the lesser inconuenience of the two , to let it sleepe thus quietly as it did , then by awaking it , to giue occasion to the people to publish this his shame the more .

Favelo all this while hearkned very attentiuely to euery word that I said , and would that I should haue remitted this businesse vnto him , to the end that hee might make himselfe a party in this reuenge , as became a true friend ; not doubting but that he should giue me good satisfaction therein , and performe it as well as I my selfe could wish . And albeit he was very earnest with me , vsing many violent intreaties , that he might take this burthen wholly vpon him , yet notwithstanding could he not bring me to giue way vnto it ; Telling him , that it was neither iust , nor fitting ; That the iniurie being mine , the reuenge should be anothers . And that onely for this end , I was come out of my natiue countrey of Spaine , with a resolution neuer to returne thither againe , till that I my selfe had giuen my enemie his payment , and in that coyne , that he should know from whom , and wherefore he receiu'd it . Adding withall , that he should doe me a great deale of wrong , to thinke that I wanted either strength or courage to put my selfe vpon such a businesse as this is , considering how neerely it concernes me , and how it toucheth my soule to the very quicke . When hee heard me say so ( seeing me thus peremptorily bent ) he grew so quiet , that he would presse that point no farther ; and though he made no reply thereunto , yet he told me ; If I haue any thing of worth in me , if I can doe any thing , if my whole estate , life , and honour , may import your seruice , I lay them downe at your feet , they are wholly yours to be disposed of . And if , for feare of the worst ( because a man knowes not what may happen in such a case ) you will ( for to make surer worke ) that I and my souldiers shall assist you , or ( at least ) giue vs leaue to stand at a gaze , to see how the world goes with you , command vs so fa●…re forth as you please ; your will shall be ours ; and we will not be wanting to the vttermost of our power , to afford you our best ayde , and to giue you all the content we can . And I will promise you vpon mine honest word , and therefore put that to my account , that if you once but set your foot within the Galley , all Italy ( would they neuer so faine ) shall not be able to fetch you thence , and would rather runne all dangers my selfe , though neuer so great , then that you should suffer the least .

Noble Captaine ( said I ) I beleeue you both in this , and the rest , and am very confident that you professe no more , then what your true heart vnto me , doth sincerely suggest . But I thinke , there needeth not so much water to driue this mill . First , because my enemie rests secure , and suspects not the reuenge that I shall take of him : And secondly , for that my selfe and Sayavedra , shall be able well enough to goe through with that which I pretend . Which being accomplished , my desire is , the businesse may be so carryed , that when his friends would right themselues vpon me , and should haply chance to pursue me , or make some diligent search after me , they might by your fauour , misse of their purp●…se , and come too late to lay hold vpon me . That which presses , and imports me most , and which I require at your hands , is ; That I may know the set day , when the Galleys are to depart , and when you meane to weigh auchor , that I may not lose either time , or occasion . He promised me , I should : And so we were agreed in the end , that by little and little , and that very secretly , I should by Sayavedra conuay my trunkes , and my cloathes aboord the Galley , to the end that I might not deferre the doing thereof to the very last push , and haue nothing else to busie my selfe about , but onely my imbarking .

I cannot tell you , how much Favelo ioyed , nor expresse vnto you the great content he tooke , when he knew that he should haue mee along with him ; whereupon , he made very good prouision of diuers delicacies to entertaine me withall , as if I had beene Admirall of the Galleys . I call'd my seruant vnto me , and told him , what had past betwixt me and Captaine Favelo , and that it was Prouerbe . now time to f f A●…remangar los braços hasta los codos . When a man set●… himselfe roundly about a peece of businesse . tucke vp our sleeues to our elbowes , because we had much to knead , and a great deale of dowe to mould , to make tarts : and therefore we must roundly set our selues to worke . I had scarce ended my discourse with him , but that he was ready for ioy to leape out of his skin , he was all a gogg with content , the tindar had now taken fire , the Deere was rouz'd , and he was set so hot on following the game , that there was no holding of him backe . Then presently did we sit in councell concerning the manner of the reuenge , and hauing well aduised with my selfe , I said thus vnto him : The best , the profitablest , and the least dangerous to our selues , will consist in matter of money . This is that which I desire ( said Sayavedra ) this chase will be better then fifteene , if we looke well to our play . Besides , the wounds that are giuen vs on the bodie , are quickly cured ; but those that light vpon our purse , are long a healing , and paine vs a great while after , if not all the dayes of our life .

Goe to then ( said I ) that we may fall the more handsomly to worke , the first Guzman goes about his , lot that he had laid for the c●…ning of his kinsmen . thing that is to be done , is to buy foure trunkes , two of which thou shalt put in that part of the Galley , which Favelo shall appoint for them . And the other two , thou shalt fill with stones , and letting no man know what there is in them , thou shalt cunningly and vn-espyde , secretly conuay to my lodging , and put them in my chamber . These stones shalt thou wrap vp close in some old rags , that where-soeuer they be , or whither-soeuer they shall be carried , and tumbled to and fro , they may not rattle , nor make any noyse ; charging him to haue a great care , that he leaue not any one empty place , but with some trash or other cramme them as close as he can for his life . As also to see , that they be not heauier , then he , in his discretion , shall thinke it fitting , making each of them to weigh some six arrobas a peece , which will come to about a hundred and a halfe good weight . I also acquainted him with euery particular thing , that he was to doe , leauing him well informed with those instructions that I had giuen him .

When these wheeles were thus set a going , I got me to Don Beltran's house , that good old man , my Vnckle , and being in conuersation with him , I began to fall into talke , how fearefull I was to goe abroad a-nights , in regard of the trunkes that I had in my lodging , two of them especially being worth the looking to , for that they were full of plate , iewels of good value , and good store of crownes , and ( to say the truth ) all the litle wealth that I had . This is your owne fault , Cozen , said he vnto me ; and if any harme come vnto you , blame no bodie but your selfe . For my house might very well ( had it pleas'd you to accept of it ) haue excused both your lodging , and your feare . For albeit , that where you are be the best in all this Towne ; yet haue you not any Inne , ( though you shall trauaile all the world ouer ) where you shall finde that goodnesse and that honestie , as to keepe any thing there in safetie . You ( Cozen ) are but a young man , and know not the world as I doe ; I am an old Lad , and haue What a Traueller must doe , when he comes to his Inne . a great deale of experience of these things , and therefore let me aduise you , that you neuer trust your trunkes , but with a sure and strong locke ; and when you are iourneying vpon the way , carry along with you in your pocket , or your port-manteau , some good pad-locke , to fasten to the staple of the chamber doore , where you lodge . For either your Hoste , or his wife , or his children , or his seruants , haue two or three keyes to all the chambers , and you shall no sooner turne your backe , but in the twinckling of an eye , you shall lose all that you left there within , and hardly recouer it againe . And therefore be sure , to make all sure . For if you shall call mine Hoste , or any of his in question , and seeke to recouer your owne by Law , they will answer to your sure , and after a great deale of cost and trouble , they will alleage for themselues , that either you carryed it away your selfe , or that you brought no such thing thither , or at least , that they knew of no such thing , because you had not , when you came in , consigned it vnto them , and committed it to their charge ; so that what was thine Prouerbe . before , they will by this meanes make it their owne . Into an Inne , g g En la posada , ●…o ay cosa posada . bring nothing in ; for it is no sooner in , then lost , vnlesse you looke narrowly vnto it . But being a young Gallant , as you are , though it please you not , out of your Iouiall disposition , and the loue to good companie , to take this for your house , which is most freely yours , yet could I wish you to fetch away your trunkes from thence , and to bring them hither , and not to leaue any more plate , or siluer there , then what shall serue for your necessarie vse . For here in my Eseritorio , all shall be kept safe for you , so that you shall not need to be afraid thereof , as long as it remaines here in my house . I thank't him as much , as if my trunks had beene worth a Million , and so I thinke he did conceiue as much , or little lesse . As well in regard that he had seene some of my vessels of siluer , as likewise my chaine , my gold , and other things , that I had brought thither with me : As also , for that I seem'd to be so desirous to haue them secured in some place of safetie .

From this talke , we fell into discourse touching my mariage : He telling me , Of mariage . that I was now of fit yeeres for a wife , and that the longer I staid without , if I had a purpose to settle my selfe and my estate , I did but lose so much time ; for that your elder mariages , were but a leauing of a mans children to be fatherlesse , and to become poore miserable Orphanes . And therefore , if I were no●… minded to be a Church-man , and to admit my selfe into some one religious Order or other , it were better for me to marry out of hand , as well in respect of mine owne comfort , as the husbanding of my estate . For seruants , th●…ugh they be neuer so faithfull , doe not for the most part want conduit-pipes , to conuey away thy wealth , scattering it abro●…d ●…ike water , vpon women , gaming , feast●…ng , ●…xcesse in apparell , and diuers other things , who seeing them-selues 〈◊〉 , and put to their shifts , to maintaine these their idle expences , rob th●…ir Masters of all that they haue , and afterwards flie the Country . He laid before me the manifold inconueniences of a single life , and on the n●…ke of that , he comes vpon me , making a large relation vnto me of the good parts of this Gentle-woman , whom he wisht me vnto . Who ( as I vnderstood ) was his kinswoman by the mother-side , and more nobly , then richly descended . But that defect was supplied by her beauty . I should haue had likewise with her , but Ho-there , ( as I afterwards came to discouer the mysterie ) a young daughter , which shee had by a mischance , begotten on her by a young Citizen of Genoa , who had promised her mariage , but afterwards ( cozening the poore wen●…h ) married with another . He told me besides , that shee had a mother , that was a very wealthy woman , and one that would be a great stay and helpe vnto me , especially in the gouernment of my house , and the bringing vp of those children , that God should blesse me withall . And that I should finde her no lesse louing vnto me , then if shee were mine owne naturall mother . I did set a good face on the matter , and seemed to like wondrous well of all that which hee had said vnto mee ; Telling him , that what-soeuer came from him , could not but be good ; and that his counsell should be a guide to my actions , without farther consultation from my selfe , as conueniencie should ●…ffer it selfe . But that I might not lose a certaine Benefice , that wa●… bestowed vpon me , for the making sure of that , I must necessarily resigne it to a Cozen-Germane of mine , my mothers-sisters-sonne , who liues in Sevill . I threw out this baite vnto him , to nibble vpon , where-with I entertain'd him for that time , hee seeming well contented with my faire answer .

Whilest we were earnestly talking of this businesse , in comes Sayavedra vnto me , and rounding me in the eare , made show as if he had deliuer'd me a very long message . I then ( seeing my time , speaking out aloud ) said vnto him ; And what answer did you make him ? And he answering me in the same key , replyde ; What answer would you haue me make him Sir , but that it should be done . Marry , beshrew your fingers for it , ( said I ) you did not well , in saying so . Doest not thou know , that I am not now in Rome , nor Sevill ; doest thou not see how rash and inconsiderate thou hast beene , in promising that for me , which I cannot performe ? Goe , carry him the great chaine , giue it him , and tell him , that this is all that I haue , and that I can doe no more then I can doe : Excuse me vnto him , and signifie withall , that I haue straind my selfe as farre for him , as my abilitie can reach . You say well Sir ( replyde Sayavedra ) but how a Gods name , shall I be able to lugg along by my side such a huge chaine as this , that weighs seuen hundred crownes in good gold ? I thinke I had need hyre a porter to helpe me . I presently made answer ; No more words ; Doe as I bid you . Get you to some Gold-smiths shop or other , and take the chaine along with you , and make choyce of some Iewell there , or what you shall thinke fit will serue the turne , and leaue the chaine there , or some other pawne , which shall be worth more then what you haue of him , and pay him interest for the lone of it : and this , I take it , will be the better course . And if the pawne fall out too short , make it out in Crownes vnto him . So shalt thou dis-ingage thy selfe of the folly , whereinto thou hast runne : For I know no other remedie but this .

My Vnckle , who listned to all that I had said ; What pawnes ( said he ) will you giue him , or for what ? To whom I made answer ; Sir , he that hath foolish seruants , must whether he will or no incurre many inconueniences , falling still into a hundred thousand errours , and as many mischiefes , and sleepe-breaking cares . There is a Gentlewoman here of Castile , that is treating a mariage with a Gentleman of her owne Country , they are both well knowne vnto me , and of my especiall acquaintance , and to whom I owe some beholdingnesse . They haue requested me , that I would furnish them with apparell and iewels for their wedding ; which is now so neere at hand , that I cannot giue them that satisfaction , that I would . You see Sir , what tree they trust vnto , and what shifts I am driuen to , to cumply with them . And the griefe of it is , that this block-head my man , had not the wit to excuse me , being he knew , how hardly I could doe them this kindnesse . And I am halfe iealous , that he out of his owne kinde heart inuited them thereunto , and without making mee priuie vnto it , hath promised them my best furtherance . For it cannot sinke into my head , that a woman of iudgement , should of her selfe request such a courtesie as this . And if it be his owne act , why should not he make it good without me ? But Sirrah ( said I to my man ) seeing it is as it is , and it cannot now be otherwise , goe wait vpon her , and doe as shee shall direct you .

The old man , seeing me so much moued , and that I seemed to be much offended with my man , for his indiscretion , said vnto me ; Cozen , let not this trouble you , it is not a thing worth the speaking of , and therefore let it not disquiet you : you are come into a place , where you cannot want friends for so small a matter as this . I know that very well Sir , ( said I ) and that my noble kinsmen here , will doe me any friendly office that lies in their power , and that as long as they haue it , I cannot lacke . But because amongst all our kindred , I know not any of those that are married , that can furnish me with such things as shee requireth for this solemnity , I dare not intreat them in a matter so troublesome as this cannot choose but be vnto them . And yet on the other side , being so earnestly requested to supply this Gentle-womans occasions , the very demanding of such a courtesie , is a kind of commanding of it , and obligeth me ( as I am a Gentleman ) to make the best shift I can for her , and to trie all my friends , rather then faile her now at her need . And yet I know well enough , that Iewels are not euery where to be met withall , which in publike assemblies , and such sole●…ne acts , as these are , can shew their faces without blushing . Cozen ( said he ) no more , it is enough ; breake not your sleepe for this , nor take you any farther care ; For I , for my part , and other your kinsmen , on theirs , will trie amongst vs , what we can doe , and doubt not but wee shall fit her in that reasonable and conuenient manner , as shall serue her turne , and salue your credit . Nay ( Cozen ) I will not haue you sit out for a little , if I can helpe it . And as for your Trunkes , you may send them hither when you please . I kist his hands for this his double kindnesse , returning him both for the one and the other , such condigne thankes , as either my wit could inuent , or my words expresse , acknowledging the great and extraordinary fauour that herein he should doe me : and so taking my leaue of him , as soone as euer I came home to my lodging , I tooke order , that the Trunkes , ( each of them hauing three keyes a peece , being well and surely lockt , and strongly plated with yron , ) should out of hand be carried thither without any more adoe .

My Vnkle , when he saw Sayavadra enter his house , and the Porters at the heeles of him , so heauy laden , that they were scarce able to creepe along with them , hauing well considered the strength of the locks and barres about them , and the distrust that I had of mine Hoast , together with the weight and heaft of them , he did certainly assure himselfe , t●…at they were full of treasure . Whereupon he asked Sayavedra what was within those Trunkes , that th●…y weighed so heauy ? Whereunto he answered ; Sir , though my master hath many things in them of great value , yet that which is worth more then all the rest , is a parcell of stones , which he hath gathered together from all parts of Italy , the choisest he could light vpon , wheresoeuer hee came , but for whom they are , or whither he will carry them , I know not . The old man arched vp his eie-brows , and wiped his eyes , wondring to see such great store of wealth , and putting them with his owne hands in safe custody , vnder the keeping ( as they say ) of Prouerbe . 〈◊〉 de siete slaues : 〈◊〉 à muy buen cobro . seuen keyes , the Trunkes remained with him , and Sayavedra returned home . And there ( like Pigeons , when they court and woo one another , and haue done billing , and murmured our their amarous passions ) we two louing companions fell likewise a crookling , and gathering straw , for to build our nest . Wee spent all that night in deuising new plots , and in plotting new deuices , how wee might fetch off another kinsman of mine , that was young , rich , and of great credit amongst them , resoluing to goe home to his house , and there to pitch another net for him , to the end that whilst others should complaine of the harme I had done them , he should not stand by and laugh , whilst others wept , and applaud his wit , that he escaped my fingers . And therefore I was minded to inuest him likewise with this new order of a second St. Iago . And so I did : For the Sunne was scarce vp , and got out of his bed , when Sayavedra taking Another plot of Guzmans . with him the two chaines , in those two boxes that were so like one another , gilded equally on euery side , neatly closed with your Dutch cla●…pes , with alike vises , or springs , that would shut of them selues , bearing them closely vnder his cloake , home we came vnto him ; where we found him newly vp , & making him-selfe ready . But not thinking that a fit time , I was willing to haue defer'd my seeing of him , ti●…l after dinner . But when it was told him that I was there , he tooke it ill , and seemed some what ashamed withall , accusing me of strangenesse , that I would be so dainty with him , as to make scruple of comming vp vnto him , as soone as I came within the house . I told him I did not doe it out of any nicenesse , but that I was loath to disquiet him , for that I vnderstood he was taking his rest . With these , and the like complements , we past the time a while , questioning each other of our healths , and discoursing of some things ( whilst he was dressing and fitting his cloathes ) about the Citie , at last hee brought me downe into a closet , or pretty little counting-house , that hee had beneath stayres , and sitting downe , after a short pausing , hee demanded of me , what wind had blowne me thither so early ? Sir ( said I ) none , saue onely that I may giue a good morrow to the day , to the end , that it may thriue the better with me : For the night hath not beene my friend .

The businesse Sir , that I come vnto you about , is to intreat you , that if you haue any seruant of yours in the house , that is an honest discreete fellow , that you would be pleased to call him hither . Which I had no sooner said , but hee presently rings me a bell , the sound whereof was no sooner heard , but two or three came hastily running in . And hauing beckned to one amongst the rest , to come vnto him ; he said vnto him ; here is my seruant Steffanello , who shall doe what-soeuer you shall be pleased to command him . That then ( quoth I ) which I shall intreat at his hands , is , That he will take the paines , to goe along with my seruant Sayavedra to some Gold-smith , to take the aloy , weight , and value of a chaine that I haue here . Sayavedra thereupon presently deliuered me the little boxe , wherein was that which I had caused to be made of pure gold ; and taking it out , I snew'd it vnto him ; my kinsman was much pleased with the sight thereof , and was neuer weary with locking vpon it , so handsome a one it was , so beautifull , so massie , and of that extraordinary curious workmanship . Insomuch , that it seemed vnto him , that he had neuer seene the like ; for it was all of dainty delicate fine linkes , smoothly polished , without any stones , or inammelling at all . When he had taken his fill in viewing of it , I return'd it backe againe to my seruant , and they two went together to dispatch this businesse , whilst we in the meane while continued talking sometimes of one thing , sometimes another , the better to passe the time . A little while after , they both came backe againe , bringing with them a little scrole of paper , with the Gold-smiths hand to it , wherein it was there set downe , That the chaine of gold , was in finenesse two and twenty Carats , and that it was ( according to its weight ) worth sixe hundred and three and fifty Spanish Crownes , and somewhat more . Then I called to Sayavedra , and willed him to giue it mee , who deliuered mee the counterfaite one , first opening the boxe wherein it lay , where once more taking it forth , we fell afresh to looking vpon it . And putting it anon after into its boxe , which I still kept open , I said vnto him ; Sir , that which I am farther to intreat at your hand , is that which followeth ; Some few nights since , I haue beene bitten at play by some Gentlemen of this Citie , but they them-selues worse ; for that I haue gotten of them a matter of fiue thousand Royals : they haue challenged me to play greater game , and I am very willing to follow my good fortune , while it lasts , and to make triall of my good lucke ; and it may be , that I may venture little , and get much . But because all kind of gaming doth wholly in a manner consist in the handsome carriage of the businesse , and that we that are gamesters , may as well lose as winne , I would not find my selfe so limited and stinted in play , that if I should chance to lose , and runne out of my moneys , that I should not be able to come againe vpon them with fresh supplies , to recouer what I lost , and ( if lucke serue ) to get vpon them . And albeit ( I thanke God ) I lacke no money , hauing at home in my Vnkles house some fiue thousand Crownes , yet I may not meddle with them , for as soone as certaine Letters shall come hither to my hands , which I daily expect from Sevill , I cannot , no not for an houre , prolong either their payment , or mine owne departure to Rome , for the setling of a good Benefice either vpon my selfe , or a Cozen-germane of mine , as it shall stand best with my Vnkles liking , submitting my selfe to his direction , who may dispose of me as he in his discretion shall thinke fit ; so that it is neither iust nor conuenient , that I should once breake , or offer but to touch that summe , lest I might then want it , when I had most occasion to vse it ; which I may so much the rather forbeare to doe , because ( if need be ) I can make vse of my Iewels , and my Plate , which like a dead commodity lie by me , and are good for nothing , but to lay to pawne at a dead lift ; and yet for all this , vnlesse some vrgent occasion , or extreame want , should force me thereunto , I should be very loath to part with them , much lesse to put them away to losse , as many too often doe . You haue here this chaine , you haue seene and view'd it , and you know what it is worth , all that I shall now desire of you , is that with all secresie ( for I would not willingly incurre the censure of an vnthrift , nor if men should talke of it , be forced to giue them an account of such trifling toyes as these ) you would be pleased to furnish me with sixe hundred Crownes vpon this Chaine , paying interest for that short tearme that I shall vse them ; assuring your selfe , that whether I winne or lose , you shall not fayle to be paid at your due time . Wherein , if I should chance to faile you , you may pay your selfe out of the chaine , for which end I shall leaue it with you , that howsoeuer the world goe , you may be a gainer , though I a loser . I likewise told him , how vpon the like occasion I had once pawned a certaine piece of new Plate , richly gilt , but he that had it of me , had vs'd it in that ill manner , that when he returned it vnto mee , it was not fit to be serued in at any honest mans boord , so that I was forced to sell it , hauing not one penny allowed me for the fashion . And therefore for the auoiding of such another losse , I intreated him to doe me the fauour , that the chaine might remaine still in his owne hands , without being posted ouer from one to another .

Hee made show that hee did not take it halfe well at my hands , that for so small a courtesie as this , I should offer him a pawne . But I clapping downe the couer of the boxe , shut it sodainly too , and so consign'd it ouer vnto him , forcing it into his hand ; vowing and protesting , that I would by no meanes receiue this kindnesse from him , if he refused to accept of the chaine . For , besides that I did not vse to weare it oft , because it was too massie and heauy for mee , he should doe me a courtesie to keepe it for me ; for as long as it was with him , I was sure it would be both safe and well vsed . Adding further withall , That being we are all mortall , and that many things might occurre vnto me , being a stranger , it was fit and conuenient , that hee should therein satisfie my desire . Vpon these words , and the earnest instance that I made with him , he accepted of it in the end , and promised me , that the first thing that he would doe , should ( as soone as hee put his foote out of doores ) bee his procuring of these moneyes for me : wherein he was as good as his word . For the very same day , whilest I was sitting at dinner , in comes Steffanello with the sixe hundred Crownes . I thankt him for his paines , and intreated him to recommend my seruice to his master ; he staid not with me scarce a Pater-noster while , & was but euen new gone , but presently in comes his master , and makes directly towards my lodging . Which sodaine approach of his did so trouble me , that I had not one drop of blood in all my whole body , nor could the best Barber of them all , haue found any such thing in my veines . Here I lost my stirrops , and knew not what to doe . For hauing but then , euen newly then receiued the Crownes , and the master following so close at the seruants heeles , I did vndoubtedly beleeue , that they had opened the boxe , and had found out the false chaine , and that he had made this haste , to hinder his man from deliuering the money vnto me . But this doubt was soone resolued , and I was quickly rid of this feare , for he came towards me with a chearfull countenance , making many offers of his loue and seruice vnto mee , and that if I had occasion to vse him in any thing else , I would be pleased to command him ; for whatsoeuer hee had , it was wholly at my deuotion : And that those moneys hee had borrowed of a friend of his vpon interest , but that it would come to a matter of nothing in the reckning . Then said I to my selfe , ( considering more the future , then the time present ) I beleeue this nothing will be some-thing to you in the end ; and how light you make of it , will light heauilier vpon you ; then you are aware . But burying my thoughts within my owne bosome , I told him , that was not much materiall , for the pawne was worth more then the vse of the money could come to .

But he had not long staid a talking with me , when loe , whilest hee was there with me , my Gentlemen gamesters enter the roome , and calling to Sayavedra for cards , there was a well-ordered battaile begun betweene vs . My kinsman perceiuing that we meant to fight it out , and to set close to it , tooke his leaue , and went his way . I was so safely intrencht in my moneys , hauing Sayavedra then in my fauour ( for being vpon our departure , it was no time now to stand with our hands vnder our girdle , nor to gather flowres , but to reape the fruits of our labours , and to hoyse sayle , and away ) I sallyed safely out vpon them , beating them so shamefully , that I put them to flight , leauing behinde as a prey vnto me aboue fifteene thousand Royals in good gold . I gaue barato to those that were present , and to the Captaine who came thither anon after this field was fought , I closely clapt fiftie Crownes in his fiste , which was all one , as if with them I had bought me a slaue , and purchased me such a seruant as should sticke to me vpon all occasions .

This quarrell being ended , and the Gamesters gone , my Captaine tooke me aside , and we two being all alone , he aduised me , that on Sunday night following , being some foure dayes hence , the Galleys were to depart . Whereupon , seeing my selfe thus straitned by time , I began to strike vp my drumme , to muster ●…y forces together , and sending abroad my tickets , this way , and that way , first to one party , and then to another , aduertising my friends , that the wedding was to be solemnized the Munday following , and that they would be pleased to make me beholding vnto them for their promised fauour . The Ants doe not come so laden with corne in August , which they gather abroad in the fields , and bring home into their granaries , as they came tumbling into my lodging with iewels , euery one striuing , who should send me the most , and the best . Which in a word , were so many , and so rich , that I was euen almost ashamed to receiue them . But I set a good face on the matter , because me thought they were not deare . My Vnckle sent me in a C●…llar to grace the Brides shoulders , and a girdle sutable vnto it , and a feather to adorne her head-dressing , which being all of gold , and set thicke with pearles , and precious stones , the three peeces were valued at more then three thousand Crownes . The rest did furnish me with rich brooches , buttons , bodkins , bracelets , pendents , ●…are-rings , tablets , carcanets , vayles , coyfes , and rings , all very curious , rich , and of great value . All which things , as fast as they came in , the Captaine vnwitting thereof , I clapt vp closely within my trunks , which stood in a by-corner out of sight . The next three dayes that were left me , I spent in visiting my kindred , thanking them for the vndeserued grace and fauour they had done me .

When Sunday was come , knowing that the Galleys were to weigh anchor a Munday morning betimes , and to put forth to Sea , I said to mine Hoste : Mine Hoste , I shall be abroad this night at play , at a friends house , where some Gentlemen haue appointed to meet , and if peraduenture it shall be somewhat late before we giue ouer play , I thinke I shall not onely sup , but lye there too , if we chance to breake off before it be day . And therefore ( good mine Hoste ) haue a care to the chamber , till we returne , though it may be , I shall send Sayavedra home vnto you . And so hauing the night to friend , I went out of my Inne , leauing mine Hoste two trunks , to pay for my dyet , and my lodging , during the time I stayed in Genoa . True it is , that by reason of the great haste we had to be gone , I left them both full , but of fine little pibbles that I had caused to be fetcht from the Sea-side ; being in show , not much vnlike to your craggy Christall of the mountaine , which did weigh some twenty pound weight a peece .

All things being done and dispatcht as I would haue it , I went aboord the Galley , and cabbin'd with my friend Captaine Favelo . I want words to expresse vnto you , the great entertainment , the Captaine ( that night I came out of Genoa ) made me , the costly supper , that he had prouided for me , and what a good bed I lay in . He demanded of me , how I had sped in my businesse . I told him , to mine owne good contentment and satisfaction ; and that hereafter , I should giue him a more particular account thereof . With this answer he rested satisfied , and questioned me no farther about it . We sup , we sleepe , but I for my part not very quietly , for though I came cleare off , and had not any the least rub , but things ranne as fairely and smoothly , as in such a case I could haue wisht it , yet I had a little thing within , that checkt me , and told me in mine eare , that I had not done well , which did much trouble me for the time . I past ouer that night , as well as I could ; and when the Sunne was vp , hauing not Guzman leaues Genoa , and carryes away with him his kinsmens goods . all this while perceiued the Galley so much as to wagg , nor hearing any beating of the oares , nor any the least noyse in the world , as if I had beene in the greatest solitude that the minde of man could imagine ; being now fully awakened , and going about to put on my cloathes ; my Captaine comes into my Cabbin , and tells me , that we had doubled the Cape of Noli . So farre we had as faire a winde , and as fine weather , as heart could wish , but it did not still continue thus fauourable vnto vs , but much contrary , and full in the teeth of vs , as you shall heare hereafter . For Fortune is not alwayes prosperous ; but with the Moone , hath her Crescents , and her Waynings , and by how much the more pleasing are her smiles , by so much the more sowre are her frownes , when shee changes the copie of her countenance . Onely I had a desire , whilest wee Guzmans conceit of his kinsmen in Genoa . were making our voyage , to know what mine Hoste thought on , when hee saw I returned not the first night to my lodging . And what the second , when the rest could heare no newes of me , thinking with my selfe , what lamentation they would make for me . How many cold shaking fits of an Ague they would haue , for want of a warme blanket ; how many couerlets would they cast vpon them , yet giue none to the Hospitall ; what diligent search they would make after me ; what seuerall coniectures , what should become of me ; disputing with themselues , whether some bodie had not murther'd me , to make themselues masters of my wealth ; or whether I had beene wounded in some quarrell . But I imagined with my selfe , that they conceiued , ( and they were in the right ) that I was gone along with the Galleys . And then being cleane out of hope of any humane remedie , I began to thinke with my selfe , how shrewdly the fleas would trouble them for many a faire night after .

Now did I begin to consider , what haste they made to vnrip my trunkes , that they might by them saue them-selues harmelesse , euery one first alledging the antelation of time , and prioritie of his debt , and so by the ordinarie course of Law in those parts , pretend as he was the first Creditor , that he might be first paid . Me thought I did likewise see , how mine Hoste did hugg himselfe , how he did laugh and chucke for ioy , to thinke how rich I had left him , by leauing him these two trunkes , which being valued according to their weight , might very well haue contented him , for a farre longer and larger allowance , then I could possible spend in so short a time . But the worth did not answer the weight : For there was nothing in them , but stones , which if he were minded to hang himselfe , might serue for his sepulchre . And what say you to my old Vnckle , doe not you thinke that he was well prouided for , with those pretious stones , which Sayavedra acquainted him withall ? But that other kinsman of mine , who went away with the chaine , who doubts it , but that he did laugh in his sleeue at the rest of his fellowes , when he saw he had such a sure pawne in his hands , all pure linkes of gold , that he might very well pay both the Principall , and the Interest . But when he found it was not Gold , but Alchymie , light and false Latten , being no better ( taking away its guilding , and fashion ) then base brasse , course copper , or such mettall , as you make your candlesticks , what man can imagine , what strange mouthes and faces he made ? How hee hang'd downe his head , fixing his eyes on the ground , then lifting it vp againe , turne vp the white of his eyes towards heauen , not out of any desire that he had to blesse him , that had made him to shine and glitter thus gloriously , but to curse my mothers wombe , for bringing forth such a Picaro , such a base rascall , and arrant theefe as I was . In this pickle I left them , and so we parted . A man might then haue said that of them , which one blinde man said to another in Toledo , who being to part companie , and to goe each to his owne house , when they tooke their leaues , said each to other ; Good night ( Gossip ) till we see one another againe .

CHAP. X.

Guzman de Alfarache sayling toward Spaine , Sayavedra by reason of a great storme , growes Sea-sicke . He falls into a Calenture , or burning feuer . He waxes light-headed , and loseth his wits . He cryes out , that he is Guzman de Alfarache , and growing mad , throwes himselfe into the Sea , where he is drowned .

WE had such faire weather when we set forth of Genoa , that the Tuesday following , by Sunne-rising , we had ( as I told you before ) doubled the Cape of Noli . And till we came to the a a The word poma , is vsed for a womans paps or dug●… , and by way of similitude may be taken for some Premontorie ietting out into the Sea , resembling the forme and fashion of a womans brests . If I misse of my ayme , I leaue it to those that haue beene in those parts to determine the true signification thereof . Pomas de Marsella , we had as fauourable and prosperous a winde , as we could wish . There did we expect that the winde should still blow faire , hauing all this while show'd it selfe so friendly and louing vnto vs . For we had a fresh gale from the East , which holpe vs so well , that the next day towards the Euening , we discouered , to our generall ioy , the coast of Spaine . But fortune , hauing not the strength to stand firme , nor being alwayes one and the same ; but weake and various , began to manifest vnto vs the small confidence that we ought to haue of her ; whereof , too soone to our great hurt , we had sufficient tryall . And now , hearing the Mariners call one to another in those termes and language , which is vsuall with them in such cases , Heauen was couered all ouer towards the North-west , with darke and thicke clouds , which guttered downe vpon vs huge and great drops of raine . Our good winde had bid vs farewell , and our hearts began to be so sad , and so heauy , as if all that same darksome blacknesse had quite ouer-cast them , such a cloud of sorrow , had like a curtaine , ouer-spred those late lightsome faculties of our soules . Which being foreseene by the Pilots , and those other watry-Counsellors at Sea , they held a Councell in the poope , debating to and fro , what course was fittest to be taken , to preuent such fearefull threatnings . Euery one spake his opinion , deliuering what he in his iudgement deemed best to be done . But seeing the winde begin to lay lustily about him , bearing his brazen wings against our woodden sides , and his forces increasing more and more , without any other resolution , before their consultation could come to a conclusion , they were instantly , without any more adoe , inforced to let fall their maine sayle , which when they had ruffled , and laid as low as the decke would giue them leaue , they tooke out another lesser one , which they call Ma●…buto . ( as they doe the other , la Borda ) which is a kinde of triangulary sayle , cut out into three corners , after the manner of a womans kerchiefe ; ( This they call la Latina ) and this they set vp about the middle of the maste , which stood at the end of the last banke of oares , fitting them-selues afterwards with those other things , that were needfull on such an occasion . They fastned their oares to the vpper deck : The passengers , and their souldiers , they commanded ( sore against their wills ) to keepe themselues vnder hatches : They fell a caulking of the Galley , from the prowe to the poope , nor were they wanting in any one of those diligences , that were necessarie for the sauing of our lifes .

Whilest they were thus busie , the night grew on , and a pitchy darknesse had ( like a pauillion ) pitched it selfe round about vs , all was clouds , Aegyptian clouds , blacke and darke as Hell ; so that hauing lost the comfort of the light , we lost likewise with it all hope of safetie ; especially when we saw that the storme was no whit allayd , but rather more and more increased vpon vs . Wherefore for the better auoyding of so many dangers , whereinto by reason of this tempest , they were like to runne , they gaue present order to hang out the lanterne , that they might the better see what they did . The Sea , now began to swell , and lifted one while its waues as high as heauen , and by and by aga ne , abasing that their pride , they tumbled downe so low , that they opened the bosome of the Sea so wide , that you might see the sand that lay in the bottome . They were faine to appoint another to assist at the helme , that was an expert Pilot indeed , and knew how to guide the Rudder to a haire . The Masters-mate they caused to be tyde fast in a chayre to the post neere vnto the poope , as being resolued either to dye in that place without remouing from thence , or to keepe the Galley aliue , and set her in safetie .

Whilest this skilfull Mariner was labouring to put this his deliberation in execution , we often demanded of him , if we were in any great danger ; and much more often then he was willing to heare . See how blind-sighted wee were , that we would rather giue credit to that which had proceeded from his mouth , then that which we saw with our owne eyes , which represented nothing but death vnto vs . But his lying tongue , seemed to afford vs like comfort , as doth that of the Physitian to the sorrowfull and afflicted father , who questions him touching the health , and life of his sonne , and whether he be likely to dye of this disease , or whether he be dead already : Who tells him , That ( God be thanked ) he is on the mending hand . In like manner , the Masters-mate , making answer vnto vs , for to cheere vs vp , and to put vs in heart , would bawle out aloud vnto vs , Que todo eranada . Tush , all this was nothing . And therefore be of good comfort ( my Hearts . ) And indeed , in telling vs so , he told vs but the truth . For all this was nothing , to that which came after . For the winde had torne our sayles to fitters , there was not one whole peece , all was rents , and rags , and it grew higher and higher still , so that we were forced to clap on our Treo , which is a kinde of round sayle , which they make vse of in stormes . Fortunes hand did not yet grow weary with whipping vs ; but as if shee had not punisht vs sufficiently already , it was our hap to haue an ill guided Galley to fall foule vpon vs , which striking vs with her prowe on the poope , made her ducke her head into the Sea , and had well-nigh ouer-turn'd her ; and to make this encounter the more vnlucky , the blow , and the losse of our Rudder ( whereon did depend the hope of our safetie ) hapned both at one and the same instant . Whe efore seeing our selues now depriued both of our hope , and helme , wanting a Rudder wherewith to steare , yeelding our selues to the mercy of the Seas , as men despayring of any remedie to repayre this losse , yet that they might not desist to vse all the meanes they could , which they thought might make best for our good , ( making a vertue of necessitie ) they made as good shift as they could , by clapping a couple of oares in the place , guiding therewith the Galley ( besides the danger ) with a great deale of toyle , and labour .

And how shall I here be able to expresse but the halfe , nay the least part of that vnto you , which these eyes saw , and these eares heard ? I doe not know the tongue that can speake it . But say I should light on such a tongue ; yet , I am sure , I shall hardly meet with those men that will beleeue it . O , how many vowes did they then make I How many Inuocations to Saints , euery one calling on that , which was the greatest and famousest in his owne Countrey ? What various deuotions , what a generall recourse to their prayers ? And some were so childish and so foolish , that you should heare no other word come from them , but , O my mother , ò sweet mother ! How many abuses , and how many absurdities , were committed amongst them ! Confessing themselues one to another , as if they could be their ghostly fathers , and had power to absolue them . Others in a loud voyce made confession of those sinnes vnto God , wherein they had offended him ; and as if they thought that God were deafe and thicke of hearing , they would stretch out their throats as high as heauen , perswading themselues perhaps , by the force of this their breath , to send their soules packing in that very instant vp vnto heauen .

In this desperate , and wofull manner , did our poore weather-beaten Galley endure this misery , together with those that were in her , till the next day following , when as with the brightnesse of the Sunne , and the clearing of the skie , we began to recouer breath , so that now all was ioy , and our sorrow was turned into mirth , cheering , and hartning vp one another . Certainly , it cannot be denyed , That of all those dangers , that attend vpon death , that is alwayes most feared , which is still neerest vnto vs . For from those other , wee thinke we may well scape . But I did not so much feare this storme , nor so sensibly apprehend the danger thereof , as I stood in feare by a contrary winde , and the new rigging vp of our Galley , to be carryed backe againe to Genoa . It was not the Sea , but the shame , that wrought vpon me . This was it , that made me to say to my selfe , when I saw how the winds blew , and the Seas raged , that all the rest did fare the worse for my sake , and that I was that Ionas , for whom this tempest was rais'd , that it might raise me vp to repentance .

Sayavedra became so Sea-sicke , that he fell into a shrewd burning feuer , and Sayavedra falls sicke of a feuer , and runs mad . shortly after grew besides himselfe . It would haue grieu'd a mans heart , and moued much compassion , to see the things that he did , and the fooleries which he vttered ; and sometimes , when the storme was greatest , and the danger most , while others were a confessing their sinnes , he would cry out in a loud voyce ; I am Guzman de Alfaraches ghost , I am that ghost of his , which goes thus wandring vp and downe the world ; whereat he made me often both laugh , and feare . But though he should haue vented some thing vnhappily , they all saw that he was mad , and so regarded not what he said . Yet for all this , he would not leaue his talking , but by flashes would fall a ripping vp of my life , and bolte out by fits , all that which I had formerly recounted vnto him concerning the courses I had taken , composing a thousand extrauagancies . And if by chance he heard any man talke of promising to performe a pilgrimage to Monserrate , thither would he leade me ; telling , at what stations , and weddings he had beene there with me . He did dresse me ( like a French Cooke ) a thousand seuerall wayes . But that which was most to be laughed at , ( though it much pittied mee to see him in that state ) and wherein I tooke most pleasure , was ; That he spake all these things of himselfe , as if he had beene true Guzman indeed .

In briefe , we being all shrewdly beaten , and growne extreame weary with our late storme , the night following we went in a good houre to take our rest , to see if we could recouer that old debt of our former lost sleepe . We were all of vs so weary , and so drowsie , and our Galley so batterd , and torne about the poope , that Sayavedra rising vp in his franticke fit , lept at that open place where our rudder was split from vs , into the Sea , on whom we could neuer after Sayavedra drownes himselfe . set eye ; though the Mariner that kept watch , as soone as he heard the flownce of the fall , presently cryde out , Hombre a la mar ; There is some bodie fallen into the water . Whereupon we began presently to coniecture , that it must needs be he ; and vpon inquiry finding him wanting , we sought to recouer him , but it would not be . And so poore Sayavedra was buried in the Sea ; all of them much lamenting his misfortune , and seeking all that they could , to comfort me . I made show , as if I had beene exceeding sorry for him , but God he knowes how true it was . The next day I got me vp betimes in the morning , which I wholly spent in receiuing the condolings , which they made vnto me , which were done in that dolefull fashion , as if he had beene a brother , a kinsman , or the neerest and dearest friend that I had in the world , bewayling the great losse that I had sustained in him ; or as if , when he threw himselfe into the Sea , he had carryed away my trunkes likewise with him . God blesse me from that mischance ( said I to my selfe ) as for any other misfortune , I doubt not but I shall very easily ouer-passe it . They knew not how ( more then this ) to comfort me , nor what they should ente taine me withall to diuert my griefe ; for they did verily beleeue , that I was wonderfull sorry for him , because I had put on a seeming heauinesse . And the more they sought to bring me out of it , the more I feigned to be in it ; at last they called to one that had beene condemned to the Galleys , who was very studious , and a great louer of curiosities , that he should come where I was , and bring a certaine booke along with him , which he had written with his owne hand , which the Captaine taking from him , and turning ouer the leafes in a carelesse kinde of fashion , he lighted by chance vpon a notable storie which hapned in Sevill ; and returning backe the booke to the owner , he will'd him to reade it vnto me . He thereupon required their attention ; which being granted vnto him , he began to reade as followeth ; recommending it first vnto them , as well for its strangenesse , as its truth .

There was in Sevill ( the famousest Citie in all Spaine , and the Metropolis of A true and strange storie of a merchant in Sevill . Andaluzia ) a Merchant that was a stranger , well borne , rich , and honest , whose name was Miçer Iacobo . He had two sons , and one daughter by a noble Gentlewoman of that Citie . They being carefully trayned vp in vertue , in good manners , and in all kinde of learning appertayning to the liberall Arts : And shee bred vp to her needle , wherein for curious workmanship , shee did excell , ( all the Gentlewomen in those parts , being meere bunglers vnto her . ) And there was some reason , why shee should be so exquisite , and singular the ein , for that from her childhood , shee had beene bred vp in a Monasterie of Nunnes , by reason that her mother dyde in child-bed , when shee was borne .

Now in regard that the goods of fortune , are mutable and vncertaine , and more in Merchants then other men , who carry their wealth in other mens purses , and commit their estates to the disposition of the winde and the weather , there being not halfe a foot difference betwixt their making and their marring , their inriching or vndoing . It so fell out , that his two sonnes returning home from the Indies , and bringing along with them good store of gold and siluer , when they were now come within sight of the barre of San Lucar , and thinking them selues as safe , as if they had beene ( as they say ) within the doores of th●…i owne house , there arises a huge storme on the sodaine , and the Sea inraged with the boysterous blustrings of the windes , begins to swell , and lo●…ke big vpon them with its billowes ; insomuch , that this poore vnfortunate ship , set vpon by two such fierce and cruell enemies , was miserably tossed to and fro , and so violently carryed out of its course , that at last vnable any longer to resist the rage of this terrible tempest , shee desperately ranne her selfe vpon a rocke , the terriblenesse of which blow , did not only open her wombe , and cleaue it cleane in the midst , but did split all the ribs of her in a thousand peeces ; so that both men and goods were all cast away , and vtterly lost , and neuer after either seene , or heard of .

When the heauy newes of so great a losse ( whose nimblenesse lyes onely in its wing ) came flying to the fathers care , such a deepe melancholy sodainely seazed on all his vitall parts , that with the griefe thereof , within a few dayes after , he also dyed . His daughter that remained in the Couent , hauing lost all her wealth , her father , her mother , & both her brothers , remaining thus abandoned , and left to shift for her selfe , was wonderfully sensible of this her wofull estate ( which might likewise haue much troubled any man whatsoeuer , though neuer so wise ) when she saw , that in so short a time , which might in a manner runne in the reckoning ( as it were ) of one day , shee had lost so many reall comforts , and with them , that hope of remedie to allay her miseries , ( for shee much desired to become a Nunne ) shee wept so bitterly , and tooke on so pittifully , that it would haue grieued any mans heart , to see the sorrowfull lamentation that shee made . Here ceased her designes , and here began her sorrowes ; Here ceased her plenty , and here began her want ; Here ceased her b b Regalo , is a word of a large extent , and signifies any thing that may giue a woman content , be it in meat , drinke , cloathes , sports , or whatsoeuer else that may delight her . regalos , and here began her troubles . Which went daily so increasing vpon her , that shee knew not in the world what to doe , nor how to be able to maintaine herselfe in the Nunnerie . And albeit all the Nunnes there wisht her exceeding well , and bare her great loue and affection for the noblenesse of her condition and qualitie , her affabilitie , ciuilitie , goodnesse of nature , sweetnesse of behauiour , and other commendable parts , condoling very much this her present necessitie , and pouertie ; and were very desirous that shee should continue still amongst them , yet could they not possibly bring it to passe . For their wills being subordinate to that of their Superiour , it being in their Prelates , and not their owne choice , neither could they effect what they desired , nor shee continue any longer amongst them . For very shortly after it was notified vnto her , that she should either leaue the house , or if she had a minde to stay , forthwith to assigne her dowry . But shee not being able ( for want of meanes ) to cumply with the second condition , shee was forc't to entertaine the former . This poore distressed maid was so cunning at her needle , and had such a curious hand in all kinde of workes , white or blacke , in silke or gold , and in ordering her colours , to giue true life and perfection to whatsoeuer shee tooke in hand , that the fame thereof was spred ouer all the Citie .

To this summe , I must adde the vertues of her soule , and the beauty of her face , both which were in that height of excellencie , ( the parts of her bodie , being answerable to those of her minde ) that he that had but once seene her , would verily haue thought , nay almost sworne , that two most cunning and exquisite Artizans , had in emulation one to the other , spent all their spirits , and imployde the vtmost of their skill , in framing such a singular creature as shee was , being such a perfect peece of beauty , and goodnesse , that shee might draw off the beholders eyes from all other obiects ( though not vnworthy the looking on ) and attract them to her selfe . Yet all this put together , being in that ( if the word doe not exceed ) excesse , was nothing , being compared with her retirednesse of life , her mortification of the flesh , her fasts , prayers , and penance . Shee , not vnwitting , that shee was now thrust out into the wide world , that shee had no more any Nunnerie to shelter , but lay open to the venues of Fortune , if shee did not the better stand vpon her guard , fearing the worlds murmuring , and those occasions , which might bring some scandall vpon her reputation , as one that was wonderfull tender and iealous of her honour , shee had got her a lodging , where shee had the companie of diuers other vertuous and religious young maydens ; and there , without any suspition , or least shadow of any ill intention , hauing no other helpe or meanes to liue , saue the sweat of her browes , and the labour of her fingers ends , shee liu'd there very frugally , keeping her-selfe within her bounds , and giuing a good example of her vertue to all the young damosels of her time .

The Archbishop of that Citie , had a great desire to haue some curiosities made for him , as certaine wrought Chalice-cloathes , c c The Spanish word , is , Corporales ; which though they signifie those things that belong to the body : yet are they more strictly taken for those linnen cloathes which are laid vpon the Altar , whereupon in their Masses , they place the bodie of our Sauiour Iesus Christ vnder the formes of bread and wine ; and represent vnto vs , that Sindone or fine linnen sheet , wherein they wrapt the sacred bodie of our blessed Sauiour when they ●…d him in his sepulchre . Vide Stephanum Durandum de ritibus Ecclesiae , lib. 1. c. 22. neat towels , handsome napkins , dainty handkerchers , and the like , to wrap the Hoste in , bordered about with some historicall worke , as should best fit with the vse whereunto ●…hey serued , and to haue them done as neere to the life as Art could attaine vnto . After much inquirie made , there being none to be found , that could doe these things halfe so well as Dorotea ( for so was this Gentle-woman called ) vpon the good report they had heard of her , they sought her out , and recommended this worke vnto her care , promising shee should be well paid for her paines . Shee considered with her-selfe , that for such a curious peece of worke as this was to be , shee must make choyce of the best , the purest , the brightest , and the finest gold threed that shee could get for money , whatsoeuer it cost . And because they that know best how to bestow it , know best how to buy it , shee her-selfe , taking some of her neighbours and friends along with her , went to seeke out this ware amongst the Gold-beaters shops , who in Sevill both make and sell these kinde of commodities . It was their hap to come to a young mans shop , that was a handsome fellow , and well behau'd , who had but newly set vp for him-selfe , and to get him the better custome , stroue to haue his shop well furnisht , and indeed , had better and more choyce then the rest of his neighbours , that traded in that kinde . Of this youg man , shee was willing to buy all the gold , that shee had occasion to vse about this worke ( as well because shee found it was fit for her turne , as likewise to excuse her-selfe a labour of going too oft out of doores ) if shee had had so much money , as would haue done the deed : but hauing no more store , then that little which they had giuen her to begin the worke withall , shee told the Master of the shop , that shee would bestow a little money with him now , but shee would come againe for more , as her worke went on , and her moneys came in . This young Occupyer , when he had beheld the beauty , and composed countenance of this young mayden , and had well obserued her manner of speech , her honest cariage , and modest behauiour , he fell into that good liking of her , and was so farre in loue with her , that the least that he could haue found in his heart to haue giuen her , was all the gold that shee had occasion to vse , which was no great matter , being that at that very instant , he had deliuered vp his soule vnto her . And perceiuing , that shee forbore to buy so much , as otherwise shee would willingly haue done , for that shee wanted money , embracing the occasion , which he had now in his hands , not so much to gaine her farther custome , as to expresse the affection that he bare vnto her , and to draw her into a good opinion of him , not suffering her to part vpon those termes , he said vnto her ; Mistresse , if the gold be good , and such as you looke after , and that it be for your turne , picke and choose where you like , and carry away with you as much as you haue vse for , or what you please , and pay me now what you can well spare , as for the rest you shall pay me by little and little , as you shall receiue it from their hands that set you a worke . The young man seemed to them all , to be very kinde and courteous , and for the ware , they could finde no fault with it , being as good , as them-selues could wish or desire . Dorotea made him present payment of as much as shee had , and hauing made choyce of as much gold , as shee thought good and needfull for her , shee carried it away with her , leauing with him the name of the street , whither he should either come or send for that which was remayning behinde . That done , they presently went their way , the poore young man being so loue-strucken after their departure , and so pittifully wounded with this amorous arrow , that he was as farre from him-selfe , as from all rest , being tossed to and fro with various thoughts , hauing his braines beaten with many troublesome and vnquiet imaginations . Loue had almost burst the very heart of him ; He did neither eat , nor drinke , nor any thing else , that might seeme to beare the name of life : so altogether was his soule occupied in the contemplation of that rare and incomparable beauty , and that mirrour of all vertue , that this his troublesome life , was to him as bad as death , not knowing in the world what to doe . At last , it seeming vnto him , that shee was a poore young mayden , and that by meanes of mariage , his chafte desires might arriue in the end to some happy port , hee resolued to informe him-selfe what shee was , as also of what life , behauiour , and birth .

The reports which were giuen of her , were such , that hee was now more perplexed , and lesse confident then before . Despairing in a manner with him-selfe , that he should euer be able to enioy so rich a iewell , holding him-selfe full more and more vnworthy of so great a happinesse , as to obtaine her to bee his Spouse . Hee was now quite out of heart , as knowing him-selfe too meane for her worth : But because it was not possible for him now to goe backe , nor did it lye in his hands ( if he would ) to haue done it ; and for that the passions of the soule , are no lesse preualent in the poore , then the powerfull , and that all are all alike subiect thereunto , and equally affected with them ; howbeit he found him-selfe cast so farre behind-hand , yet did hee neuer leaue striuing to trie if he could get before , perseuering still in his honest purpose , for that hee put him-selfe into Gods hands , who doth alwayes fauour our good intentions , and knowes how to accommodate those things , that tend to his seruice , according to his diuine will and pleasure ; presenting euermore in his prayers and supplications vnto him , that his desire was no other , then to get him a companion , with whom he might be the better inabled to serue him , and more particularly , that he might be linked in lawfull mariage with this so vertuous a creature , and one that was so much to his hearts-liking and content ; yet not that his , but Gods will should be done , where-unto he should most willingly submit him-selfe , and that he should so farre grant his request ( and no farther ) as it should seeme best to his Maiestie , and make most for his seruice .

He went likewise discoursing with him-selfe ; and amongst many other , this one presented it selfe to his imagination ; That peraduenture her great pouerty , her wary discretion , and vigilant fore-sight , would force her thereunto , considering the solitary kind of life she now led , and the remedy thereof , and laying aside those vaine points of honour , not measuring her selfe by what shee was , but what she is , she would happely accommodate her selfe to the condition of her present fortune ; and that , when his honest desire to serue her , should bee truly represented vnto her , she may chance to yeeld to my faire request . Intertaining him-selfe with these thoughts & cares , he was minded to call vpon her for the money which she ought him , but not with purpose to presse her therewith , nor to be troublesome therein vnto her , but taking occasion rather one while to see this her curious worke , another while , that passing that way , hee was of purpose come thither to know whether she needed any more gold , and if she did , that she should not want it , whilest he had any that was fit for her ; & so fetching many a walke thither , excusing him-selfe in the best mannerthat he could , and as he thought would make most for the performing of these his frequent visites , and the procuring of her good will and acquaintance , for that time he pretended nothing else ; to the end , that this being first obtained , he might the better play his game hereafter , and in the interim mitigate some part of that sorrow which her absence did continually torment him withall . In this , the young man shew'd him-selfe as discreet , as solicitous ; and as solicitous , as truly louing . Going on in those good and honest tearmes , that in a short time he gained the good wills of all those that conuersed and were companions to Dorotea . Being so farre from disliking his often visites , that they rather receiu'd them as fauours and courtesies . Amongst the rest , that liu'd there together , there were foure Sisters , to one of which , as being the grauest and reuerendest of the company , they did all shew a kinde of respect , as well for her temper and wisedome , as also for her priority of yeeres . With this graue Matron , our young man seekes to enter into a stricter kind of friendship , by reuerencing her , and obseruing her , and by presenting her with some such tokens and remembrances , as might su●…e best with the respect ( more then loue ) that he bare vnto her . So that in the end , time bringing forth occasion , by degrees he discouered him-selfe vnto her , making her acquainted with his desires , not omitting any thing that might make her fully to vnderstand the greatnesse of his affection , and the fairnesse of his pretension . Earnestly intreating her withall , that by interposing her power and authority , she would be a meanes , that his hopes should not returne home empty , and vnrewarded , her worth , and wisedome , putting him in good assurance of the contrary . And that therefore she would be pleased to continue her good fauour towards him ; and as occasion should offer , that she should goe working and disposing this pe●…ce of waxe , to receiue the impression of his affection ; leauing it to her , to imprint it in her to the life , that seeing the truenesse of the stampe , shee might be the sooner molded to entertaine the motion : But in case shee should not finde her plyable , but tough and hard to be wrought vpon , shee would seeke to mollifie her by her meeke and gentle perswasions , and remoue all those difficulties , which on her part might be a hinderance to these his honest desires ; for on his part , he vow'd and protested vnto her , that nothing should be able to crosse it , but that with open armes he would runne to embrace her , submitting himselfe to be in all things ordered , if not ouer-ruled by them . Good meanes , seconded by good intentions , and which , without any humane respects , treat of honest things ( carrying a sound heart in their breasts , and a true tongue in their heads ) haue alwayes such force and power with them , that they easily perswade , because truly beleeu'd .

This Gentle-woman , so wrought with Dorotea , sometimes this way , and sometimes that , now vsing t 'one , then t'other meanes , till at last , shee brought the businesse so about , that shee being conuinced by reason , began to yeeld to her perswasions , and to condescend to the motion that shee made vnto her ; and obeying her in all things , as if shee had beene her owne naturall mother , shee kist her hands , in acknowledgment of her thankfulnesse , putting her-selfe wholly into her hands . In conclusion , the match was made vp betweene them to both their good likings , but more especially on Bonifacio his part ( for so was her husband called ) for that he was fully perswaded , that in meeting with this iewell , no man was more happy , more fortunate , and more rich then himselfe ; hauing now got him such a w●…e , as his owne heart could not haue wisht a better , being greater in her condition and qualitie , then he deserued , and such a good creature besides , that he could leade a secure and honest course of life with her , without feare or trouble of any iellous thoughts , nor of any other thing that might cause his disquiet . They liued very contentedly together , making exceeding much of each other , and wonderfully well satisfied of that chaste and true loue , which they bare one to another . He did ordinarily attend his shop , busying himselfe ( for both their benefits ) in the exercise of his Trade , and shee abiding aboue in her chamber , either playing the good huswife , in those things that appertained to the good gouernment of the house ; or following her needle , spending part of that gold threed which her husband sold , in working goodly borders , garnishing them with curious flowers in their true and naturall colours , and other the like neat and dainty peeces , wherein shee did excell . Their gaines were great , and to make this their happinesse the fuller , there was that conformitie in their loue , and such an equall retribution in their affections , that no two in the world could liue more honestly , and more louingly together then they did .

But the Deuill , who is still waking , and neuer sleeps , but still watches most how he may breake the bond of peace , and breed brawles in loue , against this louing Couple , these who agreed so well together , that there was neuer yet any the least difference betweene them , prepares his pit-falls , sets vp his traps , and spreads his nets with all secrecie , and all the skill and cunning he could deuise , to doe them all the mischiefe he could , and if it were possible , to throw this vniforme frame , and strong peece of building to the ground . He followed this poore soule close at the heeles , watching aduantage how he might trip her vp , and ouerthrow her , and in case he could not doe that , yet at least to giue her a foyle , or make her to stumble . Insomuch , that at her Visites , when shee was at Masse , or at Sermon , yea in her greatest deuotion , when shee was receiuing the Sacrament , he did still seeke to trouble her , presenting her with the instruments of his malice and wickednesse , young Gallants , discreet in their cariage , neat in their cloathes , and sweet in their perfumes , who fell a courting her , when shee came forth , following and soliciting her whither-soeuer shee went : but all these tricks would not serue the Deuils turne , he did not reape the fruit he hoped for ; for this chaste woman , standing stiffely to her tackling , and giuing her enemie no ground , did euermore with-stand these lightnesses , by opposing against them a constant chaste minde , and a setled , and well resolued honestie . And howbeit , for to auoyd all occasion , shee did forbeare , as much as shee possibly could to goe abroad , and when shee did , it was very seldome , and when shee was of necessitie inforced thereunto , at which time shee was likewise haunted and persecuted by them . They did round her doore night and day , they sought inuentions , and vsed all the meanes that might be for to see her ; neither did this also profit them any thing .

Amongst those Gallants , that desired to serue her ( for all of them were young Gentle-men , of very good fashion , and the chiefest in Sevill ) there was one , hat was d d Teniente , is one that is substitute to another in an Office . A Lieutenant . A tenendo . As hauing the charge and keeping of some Forts or Castle , which he faithfully keeps and maintaines . Covatr . verb. Teniente . Teniente of the Towne , a young man , vnmarried , and rich . This Gentle-man liu'd right against the house where shee dwelt , where hee had very faire and goodly roomes , being especiall and principall lodgings , and of so many stories high , and those goodly open galleries , that they did ouer-top and looke into those lower ones of Dorotea , notwithstanding that they were distanced by a whole street , that interposed it selfe betweene their houses . So that from his Turrets , his Terraces , and his high windowes , he might ouer-looke her , and see what shee did ; and that so plainly , that neither her husband , nor her-selfe , could scarce rise vp in the morning to make them ready , or at night get them to bed , without being seene and espyed by him ; especially they being carelesse , and heeding no such matter , and the other with extraordinarie diligence , watching and prying what they did . This Teniente then , making vse of this occasion , with all carefulnesse and vigilancie , accompanied with insupportable passions , and sorrowes , did labour ( as if his life had layen vpon it ) how he might come to haue some speech with her , or receiue any fauour from her hands . But finding in the end , that he lost his labour , and spent his time in vaine , he was forced , as the rest of his fellowes were , to giue ouer his e e The Spanish word is ; Bolver al pucsto con la can̄a . To pitch downe his standard . To proceed no farther . sute , set vp his rest , and turne backe the same way he came , without obtayning any the least looke , or fauour from her , not being able to perceiue in her any shadow of hope , that either now or hereafter ( though neuer so small ) shee was likely to graunt him . For this chaste woman did liue in that sober and discreet fashion , and did so well and wisely gouerne her-selfe , that shee put him quite off from any suspition , which might incourage him to pretend any kindnesse from her , or but wash off one haires bredth of gold from this good creatures credit ; though it is not to be doubted , he vsed all the Art he could , to haue made her some few graines lighter then shee was .

There went likewise along in the same dance with the rest , another Penitentiarie , that was of the same brotherhood and companie of these foolish f f Disciplinantes , are they that lash them-selues to doe penance . Disciplinantes , and selfe-afflicting louers . This was a Gentleman of Burgos , gallant , young , discreet , and rich . Which good parts , fauoured by his franke , and bountifull disposition , might ( a man would haue thought ) haue digg'd downe mountaines , and laid them leuell with the lowest earth . But the chaste Dorotea , neither by this Gentlemans good parts , nor the Teniente's great power , nor all the passions of other her Louers , could be moued one ●…ot from her honourable resolution , not hauing any sense or feeling thereof in the world , as if shee had beene no woman of this world , or had minded any such matter . Against all these assaults , shee show'd her-selfe a strong Tower , an inexpugnable rocke , against which the continuall beatings of those furious waues of their raging lust and froathy appetite ( not being able to preuaile ) were broken and dasht in peeces . And it is not to be doubted , but that her honestie , continually keeping watch , like the Crane , that with the stone of Gods loue , raising her-selfe from the ground , and her foot standing fast and firme on the steedy affection that shee bare to her husband , did free her from these birds of rapine , these Eagles of Caucasus , that sought to make a prey of her . And it had beene impossible to haue wounded either her , or her honestie , if the cunning and crafty Fowler had not spred his net , couering and shadowing it ouer with the greene grasse of holinesse , and simulated sanctitie , to intrap this simple , harmelesse , and innocent Doue . This Burgalese ( whose name was Claudio ) had to his seruant a dainty fine shee-slaue , not swarfe and tawney ( as others commonly be ) but faire and well-fauour'd , of a good presence , a good garbe , and gracefull behauiour , borne in Spaine of a Moorish slaue of Barbary . Shee was so cunning , so subtle , so nimble witted , so dextrous in her tricks and deuices , such a worker of her-selfe into all folkes loues and affections ( were it for her owne ends , or others ) so curious in visiting Church-yards , so charitable in accompanying those that were to be hang'd , that shee was able to make g g When they will note out a Watch , or the sorceries of an old Hagg , the Spaniards indeare it with this phrase , Que ha●…à naçerberios en cima de la cama . That they will make water-cresses to grow on the top of a bed . that is ; shee will do strange things , or worke wonders . Covarr . verb. Berros . water-cresses to grow on the top of a bed . Shee was such a one , as for such like affaires , her fellow was not to be found . Her Master one day call'd her vnto him , and giuing her account of this his Loue-torment , he craued her counsell , how he might come to compasse his pretension . This his good slaue , after that shee had beene well informed of the businesse , and knew how the case stood with him , as if shee had beene in iest , smilingly said vnto him ; Why how now ( my good Master ) what mountaines haue you to remoue ? What Seas to dry vp ? What dead to raise vnto life ? What great difficultie is there in that which doth thus afflict thee ? Or why doest thou so indeare it vnto me ? Sir , Are not these things that I am well seene in ? Little oyle , and lesse labour , will serue to bring this wheele about , then thou thinkst for . Thou mayest now make reckoning that shee is thine owne , and that thou hast her already in thy hands . Let not this therefore trouble thee any farther , but be of good cheere , and plucke vp thy heart ; for within these few dayes , I will deliuer this Hare into thy lap . And if I doe not , let me lose my name for euer , and call me no more Sabina , the daughter of Haja . From that time forward , shee tooke this businesse to taske , and began from that very instant , like a cunning Chesse-player , so to order and marshall her men , designing with her-selfe how to make her draughts , and within how many remoues , to giue first the checke , and then the check-mate . Now does shee set her-selfe roundly to her play , and begins this her game , mouing first one of her pawnes , reseruing her best men for the last push , if the meaner should miscarry in this battaile .

First of all therefore , shee makes me a fine delicate little basket , of the greene sprigs of Mirtles , Pome-citrons , & Oranges , adorning and setting it forth with Gally-flowres , Geeimines , Muske-roses , and other sweet flowres , bound in with small tender bull-rushes , which were composed and set together in most dainty and curious manner . This basket shee takes along with her , and beares it to the Gold-beater ; Telling him , that shee was seruant to a certaine Gentlewoman that was a Nunne in that Citie , and Lady-Abbesse of a Couent ; who hauing notice of the goodnesse of his ware , and hauing necessary vse of some of his best gold , for to flourish ouer certaine things , which were to serue for some ornament that were to adorne that Monasterie against Midsommer day , which was a great Festiuall with them , shee had sent him that little basket for a token , intreating him , to send her two pound of his purest and finest gold , that shee might make proofe of it , and that if it should be found to be so good , as to her it had beene commended , and that shee found it fit for her purpose , shee would pay him well for it , and he should from hence-forth haue her custome for all the gold that should be spent in her House , sending weekly for so much as they had occasion to vse . Besides , shee would be ve●…y thankfull vnto him , if he seru'd her well , and bestow now and then vpon him such dainties and curiosities , as those religious places vsually afford . B●…facio was m●…ch gladded with this new occasion of fresh gaines , and no lesse with his little basket of flowres , which he made much reckoning of , being so neatly and ar●…ficially wrought , as indeed it was . Which he had no sooner receiued ( hauing first dispatcht the slaue away with the gold ) but he presently carryes it vp to his wife , putding it in her lap with great ioy , which was by her with no lesse receiued Shee asked him , of whom hee had bought it : And then he told her all that had passed . Then did shee esteeme it much more then before , because it brought to her remembrance the time of her childhood , when with other girles of her yeeres , and the Nunnes of the Couent , shee did busie her-selfe in the like exercises . Whereupon , shee intreated her husband , that when shee came to him againe , he would send her vp vnto her , for shee would gladly be acquainted with her .

The next weeke following , being some six dayes after , Sabina returnes very iocondly , boasting how good the gold was , and that shee was come for as much more of the same ; bringing with her a large message in the behalfe of her Mistresse the L●…dy-Abbesse , and presenting him from her , with a little image of the rinde of Limmons , and a Rosario sutable to the same , so cariously cut out , that it was well worthy much estimation . As soone as he saw it , he would not him-selfe receiue it of her , but intreated her , that shee with her owne hands would deliuer it to Dorotea his wife . Now the h h Cayo la sopa en la miel . sop was fallen into the honey-pot . Prouerbe . Now had she what she would haue . This fell out as pat for her as a pudding for a Fiyars mouth . But making strange of this newes , and as though shee had knowne no such matter , shee said vnto him . Ah , thou naughty man , doest thou speake in carnest ? Art thou marryed indeed ? I doe not beleeue it . Thou art bought and sold with vs for a single man , we tooke thee to be a Batchclour , and my Mistresse talkt of marrying thee with a pretty Lay-mayd●… t●…at we haue in our House , as fine and as fresh as the flowres in May , and is both beautifull , and rich . Bonifacio replyde ; I haue one already as rich and as beautifull , as you there can giue me any , and with whom I liue most contentedly . And if you will not beleeue me , goe vp , and see . Sabina then said vnto him ; In faith no , not I , you shall not get me vp stayres , I am afraid you will play the wagg with me , and that you doe but iest . I assure you , I doe not iest ( said Bonifacio ) and therefore ( friend Sabina ) you may boldly goe vp . Vp shee goes , and hauing entred the roome where shee was , shee no sooner saw Dorotea , but shee runnes with open armes towards her , and throwes her-selfe downe at her feet , making a thousand ducks and reuerences vnto her after the Moorish fashion , admiring much her rare and singular beauty , which though shee had heard it much spoken of before , yet this worke of nature , went farre beyond the words that were vttered of it . For it was such an admirable peece , that report was not able to expresse it to the lise , but must needs fall short in the praising of it . But shee stood like one astonished , when shee beheld the frames , and those loomes of rich embroyderies , and other the like workes , wherein shee spent her time , wondring at their perfection and curiositie , saying vnto her ; How is it possible , that my Mistresse should not haue the happinesse to enioy such excellent good things as these ? No , no , it shall not be long ( by the grace of God ) ere you two know one another , and be better acquainted , and enter into a strict league of friendship . O sweet Iesus ! When I shall tell my Lady-Abbesse , what I haue seene , ô how will shee enuie my good fortune ? What a longing desire will shee haue , till shee see that face of yours , and be made so happy as to enioy your good companie ? By the life of her , that left me here behinde her , and as her soule is there , where those eternall tapers continually burne , let the pocks consume my iaw-bones , if I be not a Bawd to these your loues , because I haue a great minde to bring you together , and that yee should dearely loue each other . I will not faile hereafter to visite you oftner , you are a pearle of that price , that I cannot choose but loue you , make much of you , and desire to serue you . After these words , and many other , full of ceremony and complement , she tooke her leaue , and went away with her gold . And from that time forward , euery second or third day , shee made one errand or other thither , one while for gold ; another , saying that she past that way , telling Bonifacio , that she should be guilty to her selfe of neglect , & that she should commit treason to her owne heart , if she should passe that way , and not performe a visit to that good Angell of his , being the onely Saint of her sexe , to whose shrine shee did owe all respect and reuerence . At other times , she would excuse her comming , by bringing her some rarity or other , and whilest shee was talking with her , goe disposing and preparing of her , that she would of her owne accord goe one day and make merry at the Monastery .

Now , when she had moulded things to her mind , and thought that this fine peece of gold was fit for the hammering , she tooke a walke thither on Munday morning , carrying along with her two pretty little baskets , the one hauing in it some Conserues , and the like toyes ; the other , some fruits of that season , the first and the best that were to be found vpon their first comming . Which shee presented her withall , telling her , because they were fruits of their owne garden , and the first they had gathered , her Lady Abbesse thought they could not be better bestow'd on any , then her selfe . And that withall she had a double request vnto her ; The first , that the next insuing Munday , being the feast of the glorious Saint Iohn Baptist , and the Sunday before it , their first Vespers , she would be pleased to doe her the fauour to stay those two daies with her in the Monasterie , doing penance there with her ; which she might the more conueniently doe , in regard that she had no occasion of businesse during those two Holy-dayes ; and besides , the Nunnes , after they had ended their feasts , were amongst them-selues to represent a Comedy ; And that the Abbesse would take no pleasure nor contentment in it , if she would not doe her this fauour , to come and see it acted ; and that other principall Gentle-women , that were of kinne to the Nunnes , were likewise to come thither , and that they should goe all along together , bearing each other company : The other , that she might haue three pound of her best and finest gold , to make tufts and tassels for a rich cloath that was to be vsed before the Altar ; desiring her , if it were possible , that shee might haue the choisest and the finest for that purpose , that was to be got . To this of the gold , Dorotea made answer , she could , and would doe that for her with a very good will ; for this ( quoth she ) is in my power to performe ; I could likewise be content to cumply with whatsoeuer my Lady Abbesse shall be pleased to command me , but this is not in mine but my husbands hands . You know ( Sister Sabina ) that I am not Mistresse of my selfe , I am vnder anothers command , and therefore in this , you must aske my good-mans leaue ; it is hee that can giue you an I , or a No , whether I shall goe or stay . To whose will I must , and euer shall conforme my selfe . This were fine in good faith ( said then Sabina ) if your husband should deny vs so small and so faire a request as this ? Let me neuer thriue , if I goe out of doores these eight daies , vnlesse hee giue you leaue : Say your selfe , doth it stand with reason ( to omit the mentioning of common ciuility , and good manners ) that one onely request which my Mistris makes vnto you , being ( besides the first that euer she made vnto you ) so earnest a one , and so iust , that you should lose all respect towards her person and her kindnesse , as to deny her so sleight a courtesie , desiring ( as shee doth her saluation ) to inioy such a paradise as your selfe ? Fie Sabina , hold thy peace ( said Dorotea ) be not so prophane , nor doe not flout your poore friend , for I am old . Old , ( said Sabina ) yes , yes , you bee very old indeed ; Let mee die of your disease . You might as well haue told me , that the Spring is the end of the yeare , and that Lent is Christmas . But let vs leaue off iesting ; As old as you are , God grant your husband may long inioy you , and giue you the fruit of his blessings . And therefore without any more adoe , I pray grant our request ; for I meane to goe away with this good bargaine , that my mistresse may con me thanke for it . O how much will she make of this pretty little Rogue ? Bonifacio and Dorotea , fell a laughing to see her so pleasant ; while hee ( with a Prouerbe . cheerefull countenance ) not seeing the i i La cusebra esta entre la yerva . Snake that lay lurking in the grasse , nor the ambush that was laid for him , suspecting no harme , and the lesse , in regard of the great confidence that he had in his wife , said : Well followed in good faith ; Now ( by my life ) Sabina hath pleaded hard in this cause , and hath handsomly bestirr'd her-selfe ; shee must not be denyed for this once , especially being it is my Lady-Abbesses pleasure to haue it so . And therefore I prithee ( sweet Heart ) goe and recreate thy selfe there those two dayes , for I know thou wilt be well pleased there-with , and it shall be no small contentment to mee , because it shall content thee . And therefore ( Sabina ) you may tell her Ladyship that her will shall be fulfill'd as well in this , as in any thing else , wherein I may serue her . And when these Gentle-women that you speake of goe vnto the Monasterie , I pray so order the matter , that they may passe this way , and take my wife along with them . Sabina , being a well-spoken woman , returned them thanks in excellent good language , vsing such sitting phrase as best suted with the accomplishment of her desire . Shee hy'de her home , so well contented , and so proud of this rich purchase that shee had made , that the steps shee set forward , seemed to goe backe againe , and that she should neuer come time enough to her Masters lodging . Her heart was ready to haue burst in her bodie , it was so ouer-swolne with ioy ; and would ( had it beene lawfull for her so to doe ) haue found in her heart , to haue cryde it out at the high Crosse. A man might haue seene her mirth in her lookes , her blood boyled within her , and her eyes did seeme to dance in her face for very ioy ; you would haue thought , that through them , and her mouth , shee would haue vttered the cause of this her ( more then can be expressed ) content . When shee came into the house , no ground could hold her , shee fell presently to plucking off her chapines , to vndoing of her mantle , flinging it with all the haste shee could ouer her head , leauing it trayling at her taile , and holding vp the fore-skirts in her hands , lest they might hinder her speed , shee runnes mee , as fast as her leggs would carry her ( like one that had beene fraid out of her wits ) into her Masters chamber , who attended her comming . And out of meere haste , that shee might tell him all at once , all hung betweene her teeth and her tongue , that shee was not able to speake one ready word . Shee would one while be in the Actiue , another while in the Passiue : Well , or ill , as well as shee could , shee deliuer'd her message in that manner , that those eight dayes neuer had an end , shee in telling him of them , and he in asking her of them , a least a thousand times apeece ouer and ouer . Euery moment they returned to treat a-new of one and the same thing , re-iterating the same , I know not how many times ouer , and fell to make Comments thereupon , discoursing how it could be possible , that this businesse should take effect : It seemed vnto them , that that whereof they talked , had fully contented them , and gone for good payment , their beleefe neuer comming to an end , neuer being able to perswade them-selues , that the newes of so great a desired good , could be certaine , or that euer they should come to see so happy a day .

Dorotea and Sabina , being thus agreed vpon the point , that this businesse might be the more cleanely carryed , Claudio tooke order , that certaine women should be prouided and fitted vp , that were of his good acquaintance , and friends and well-wishers to his house , such as he might safely communicate any secret vnto , to the end , that by their good care and diligence , they might helpe to bring this his purpose to passe .

Sunday ( the appointed day ) being come , some of them , apparrelling them-selues like married wiues , others , being in the habit of maydens , and others after the fashion of graue k k The Spanish word is , Duen̄a , and signifieth an ancient . Gentle-woman that is a widow : now ta●… commonly for those that weare large vayles like your Nunnes , to difference them from maides . And in the Kings Court , they call those Duennas de honor , that are principall persons , and become widowes , & your Queenes and great Princesses haue them still attending vpon them . Covarr . verb. Duen̄a . and matron-like Gentle-women , went along with Sabina to goe fetch Dorotea . They come to her house , they knocke at the doore , her husband comes forth , who staid at home looking for them : Who seeing such a worthy traine of women , opinionating them to be principall persons , presently call'd to his wife , that shee should make haste , and come downe , that the companie might not stay for her . Downe comes Dorotea , no lesse innocent , then contented . All of them did very louingly salute her , bestowing many kinde words , and ceremonious complements vpon her . And her husband , hauing consigned her ouer vnto them , they placed her in the midst betweene them , and so with great ioy they set forward on their voyage . And as they were walking towards the Monasterie , one of them , that had a vayle on her head , and of more reuerend aspect and speech then the rest , makes a stop , and sodainely cryes out ; Ay me , forgetfull wretch that I am , how hath it slipt our remembrance , that we forgot to goe for Donna Beatriz the new marryed Bride , who stayes at home expecting our comming , who also is inuited to the Nunnerie ? Then another of them made answer , By the bones of my father , you say true . As God helpe me , I did no more thinke vpon her , then I remember the first l l No me acordaua mas della , que de la primera camisa , que me vesti . smocke that was put on my backe . We can by no meanes goe without her , we must needs haue her along with vs , and therefore let vs turne downe here , for it is not much out of the way , and we shall be there by and by . Then one of those , which was to the rest , as the bell-weather , that goes before the flocke , ruffling betweene her legs a large sided kirtle , and hauing a Rosario hanging at her necke , which serued in steed of a bell , leads the way vnto them , Prouerbe . whom all of them follow , till shee had brought them to Claudio his house . They call'd at the doore ; A slaue , putting her head out at the window , askes , who was there , and what they would haue . One of them made answer ; Runne in quickly , and tell your Mistresse , that shee would be pleased to make haste , and come downe , for we stay here for her . Shee made as if shee had gone in to deliuer her the message , and anon after comes forth againe with this answer , That her Mistresse would intreat them to haue the patience to stay a little , till shee had but fastned a pinne or two to her head-dressing , and had put on her mantle , which would not be long a doing , desirng them in the meane while to come in , and rest them-selues in the Hall . Whereupon , they entred through a faire Court into a goodly spatious Hall , very well furnisht , where the rest of the women remained , onely two of them past forward with Dorotea , into a midling square roome , which was hung with cloath of siluer , and watchet damaske , with a bed sutable thereunto , full of imbossed worke of gold , the chaires , and cushions , and carpets corresponding with the rest . Adioyning close to the bed was a curious m m Estrado is a place raised halfe a foot from the ground , couered ouer with carpets , where Ladies and Gentle-women sit vpon cushions , and receiue their Visites . Lat●… Stratus , ab stemendo : sed pouùs à Graec. 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 . Covarr . verb. Estrado . Estrado , where these three sate them downe , and had scarce warm'd their cushions , when the two , that were with her , began to complaine , and cry out ; Good God , what does this new Bride Donna Beatriz meane to make vs stay here so long ? Fie , what a tedious thing is this ? I care not ( sayes the one to the other ) if I goe in , and see what shee is a doing , I dare pawne my life , shee is not yet out of her bed . I prithee , Sister , ( if thou beest a good wench ) goe with me , that we may know , when we shall get hence . Which word was no sooner spoken , but they both went presently out of the roome , leauing Dorotea all alone . In conclusion , they were all vanish●…d , and not any body liuing to be heard about the house .

When all was hush , Claudio comes in , and sitting downe vpon one of the cushions , that was next to Dorotea , he began to make her many faire offers , discouering vnto her the plot that he had laid to get her thither , excusing this his manner of proceeding , with the great torments that for her sake hee endured . When shee heard him speake in this language , and now ( too lat●… ) perceiued how shee was betrayed ; poore Dorotea was not a little troubled ; for shee knew him by sight , and was not ignorant of his pretensions . Shee saw her-selfe taken in the trap , shee knew not what to doe , nor how to defend her-selfe , and therefore began with teares and prayers , intreating him with all the Rhetoricke those two good Orators could vse , that he would not spot her honour , nor offer her husband that wrong , by committing so grieuous a sinne , and so heynous an offence against God . But all would not serue the turne . To cry out , was to no purpose ; for there was no body there to take her part . But say her sh●…ikes might haue disturbed Claudio , and haue drawne the people in the street to come in , whosoeuer should haue found her there , would questionlesse haue condemned her for her comming thither , giuing no credit to this tricke that was put vpon her , though shee should haue sworne out her heart to the contrary . Shee defended her-selfe ( poore soule ) as well as shee could ; but Claudio cou●…ting her one while with many faire and kinde words , and when they would not preuaile , breaking forth another while into actions of violence , with a great deale of resistance , and against her will , he pluckt from her by force such fruits as he could reach to , but not those that he desired ; entertayning him-selfe , and tyring out her , in this his rude wrestling with her . But in the end , when shee saw that shee could no longer hold out against him , and that her breath and strength did both faile her , and that the battaile would be lost on her side , Claudio still getting more and more ground vpon her person , shee yeelded vp the Fort vnto him , for want of succours in conuenient time , hauing fought it out ( as they say ) to the last man , and keeping out the enemies as long as shee could . They two , were all alone ; the doore fást lockt ; the tearme long , ( no lesse then two dayes ) Claudio , his friends about him , she a lone-woman ; he strong , and shee weake ; and none can doe more then they can doe . This might haue very well beene said to haue beene a sportfull contention , and an amorous combat , befitting S. Iohns feast , if the heauen of their pastime had not beene ouer-cast with a sodaine and vnexpected cloud . They fared daintily , did dine , sup , and sleepe together . But this their pleasure lasted but a while , short was their content , and their rest sodainely and vnexpectedly Prouerbe . interrupted . For the n n El diablo nunca hizo empanada , de que no quisiesse comer la meyor parte . Deuill neuer yet made that pye , whereof him-selfe did not eat the better part . It is a vsuall thing with him , when he maketh any such kinde of meeting , to set vp a tent , or pauillion , inuiting them to goe into it , that there they may couer , and hide them-selues , and none may know of their doings , laying a charge of secrecie and silence on their present actions ; but afterwards , w●…en they are closely shut vp , and kept hid from the open eye of the world , in this their greatest , and ill-conceiued securitie , he sets the doores wid●… open , 〈◊〉 , and throwes these pauillions downe to the ground , manifesting in publike , thei●… concealed sinnes ; and beating vp his drumme , and ringing out his Alarum-bell , he calls the people together , that they may come and see what they are a doing , leauing them ashamed and sad , making him-selfe very merry to see them thus caught in his snare , and laughing and flouting at them , he mak●…s him-selfe a Holy-day in Hell , ioying and triumphing in his new-gotten victorie . Who would once haue thought , that so subtle an inuention as this was , so well ordered , and in so short a time , and by so strange a meanes brought about , should come to be discouered ? Who , from such happy beginnings , and meanes , would euer haue expected such adue●…se , and Tragicall ends ? But I say ill , and therefore correct my selfe : For we could looke for no other , considering the dance , and who he was that led it ; and heauen cannot but openly ●…unish such wickednesse , and violence . And tho●…gh the punishment was not eq●…all to the offence , yet the blow was such that was giuen them , that thereby euery good Discoursist might come to the knowledge of the fault , and repent him-selfe thereof .

Now whilest they were thus in their mirth and iollitie , all that day passed so without account , and order , that there was no heed taken of any thing : The seruants in their quarter , fill'd their bellies , tooke away the wrinckles from off their guts , by glutting them-selues full , and pulling the faucets out of the hogs-heads , they did eat and drinke so lustily , that they were faine at last to creepe to their beds , as a Cat doth o o Yr●…as camas gateando . vp a wall , vpon all foure ; or as a ship-boy Prouerbe . vp to the top of the maste ; leauing the chimney full of fire , and a great deale of dry wood standing by it ; The fire takes me hold of the brands , and other dry clefts , and they being tinded , did communicate their flames to their fellowes that stood by them , so that towards mid-night , all that quarter of the house was burnt , and not one bodie in all the house that did perceiue it , so fast were they all a-sleepe . It was the Vespers of S. Iohn , and that night the Teniente ( to see good order ) vseth to round the Towne , and by the great splendor that the flames did cast a farre off , he saw what a light it gaue , and suspected ( which was so indeed ) that some house was on fire . And so following the clearenesse of this light , the brightnesse thereof brought them to Claudio his house . They call'd out aloud , and knockt hard at the gate ; for the house was great , and the people that were within , some were weary , some drunke , and others burnt , but none that did answer . There was a great noyse and out-cry amongst the neighbours , euery one seeking to preuent the threatned danger , and to prouide as well as they could to saue their goods and persons , many people of all sorts , and all parts of the Citie , came hastning and running thither , who by maine force brake downe the gate , and laid it leuell with the ground , and entred the house , supposing all those that were in it , to haue beene consumed with the fire , or at least choaked and stifled with the smoake , because they could see no body stirring in it . The noyse and clamour was such , that Claudio awak'd , and startled with this so great a rumour , and confused a sound , not knowing what the matter might be , hastning with his sword in his hand , ( he and Dorotea being both naked ) he opened his chamber-doore , and when he saw the fire , he returned backe , that he might throw some thing vpon him , and saue him-selfe by flight . The Teniente thought that the people that were without , had broke open that doore , that they might rifle the roome ; hasting thither with all diligence , that he might saue it from the spoyle and ransacking of the more vnruly route , hee found these two louers running about the chamber , from one corner to another , to seeke out their cloathes , and hauing them in their hands , neither of them had their owne , interchanging them , through their more haste , then good speed . Now you may imagine in what taking they were , and what they might thinke , seeing them-selues thus naked , the house full of people , and her greatest enemie , the Teniente ; who had thus taken them napping . But that we may come to him , who streight way knew Dorotea ; whereat he was so amazed , that of all those three , you could not tell for your life , which of them was most astonied . For the Teniente , had any body told him of such a thing , he would neuer haue beene perswaded to beleeue it ; and though he had now his owne eyes to be his witnesses , yet did he seeme to doubt of it . So troubled were his thoughts , so his heart inflamed with iealousies , and disdaynes , so mad and desperately bent , that to be reuenged on them both , without any farther consideration , he commanded them to be carried away to prison ; his spleene being more against Dorotea , then Claudio , for that shee had reiected him , and admitted of another , and therefore was resolued to doe her a disgrace , and to defame her all that he could , deuising with him-selfe , how he might likewise picke an occasion to commit her husband . For he thought it a thing impossible , that this should be done without her husbands priuitie , and that he had beene witting and consenting to this businesse , and had giuen his wife leaue to bestow a nights lodging vpon this young Gallant , vpon some particular interest , that might make much for his profit . Nor is it so strange , that the Teniente should take this indirect course : For a Loue-passion , or passionate fit of Loue , blindes the vnderstanding , and makes the minde of man turne cruell and tyrannicall . They carryed her away , her face being couered ouer with her mantle , hauing giuen expresse order , that shee should not be seene , or made knowne to any , till information should be made against her . And Claudio , he likewise was committed . And howbeit he had vsed all the meanes he could , to hinder this his harsh proceeding , alledging in excuse the great and many harmes that might happen thereupon , yet neither reasons , intreaties , nor all-perswading Crownes , could allay the rage of this incensed Iudge , so bigg was his heart swolne with malice and reuenge . They remained in prison , and the Iudge fomed at the mouth , till the fire was asswaged , and quite put out ; but that of his heart did burne apace . It was now past midnight , and he had endured a great deale of trouble , but much more anger and choller . He got him to bed , and would haue slept if he could ; but in him was that prouerbe verified , which saith , p p Assi tengays el suen̄o . Assi tengays el suen̄o : Prouerbe . So let him sleepe , that troubles another mans rest . He could not sleepe in quiet , nor is it to be beleeued , that he should ; but rather it is to be supposed , and true it was , that transported with rage , his head was plotting of reuenge , dressing this his rancorous dish of poyson a thousand seuerall wayes , that they might not escape his hands , at least not come off , with the sauing of their honour . But hee reckoned without his q q H. zo la cuenta sin la huespeda . Hoste . For his feet were scarce warme in his bed , when Dorotea was out of his reach . Sabina lay in Prouerbe . an inner chamber next vnto her Masters , to the end , that if he should need any thing in the night , shee might be ready at hand , when-soeuer he should call . And for that shee had diligently listned to all that had passed , shee presently bethought her-selfe of a remedie for this disease . For your women , vpon the sodaine , are more quicke , and nimble witted , then your men ; nor must you giue them leaue to aduise any thing long with them-selues , if you meane to haue it succeed well and happily . Shee takes me out of her lodging a good fat Capon , which was left vntoucht at supper , and a good peece of a gammon of bacon , which being of a wilde Bore , was held to be a dainty dish , a good flagon of rich wine , a loafe or two of bread , and money in her purse , and clapping a bed , sheets , and a couerlet on her head , and bearing a little basket , wherein shee had put her commodities , vpon her arme , away shee trugs along to the prison . Shee intreated the Iaylour , that he would giue her leaue to carry in that her bed and supper for one of her Masters maydes , who because shee had show'd her-selfe too slow and negligent , vpon so vrgent an occasion , in bringing a bucket to draw water for the quenching of the fire , the Teniente in his heat had committed her to prison . With this slight excuse , and foure Royals of foure , which shee clapt in his hand , he opens the doore , and lets her in , making him a hundred cursies ; howbeit by reason of the luggage which shee had on her head , he could not come to see her face . In this manner , in shee goes to Dorotea , whom shee found rather dead then ali●…e : They two stood talking alone together , for the rest of the women-prisoners were all asleepe , and taking hold on this so faire an opportunitie , it so fell out , that Dorotea was transformed into Sabina , by putting on a greene kirtle that shee wore , who called to the Porter , that kept the prison doore , and giuing him the supper , that was prouided for that end , told him , that the may de would neither eat any meat , nor come in any bed , vntill shee were released . Hee was so ioyed therewith , that he thought he had seene the heauens opened , and when he had tasted of the bacon , and found what a tarte yet pleasant relish it had with it , he takes the flagon of wine in his hands , and giues it a good swigg , reseruing the remainder against the next day . Whilest the Porter was making him-selfe merry with his good cheere , Dorotea heaues vp the bed vpon her head , and so goes out of the prison , leauing Sabina there in her place , and with those two women that bare her company the day before , and staid waiting for her comming forth , shee was conducted by them backe againe to Claudio his house , where shee continued till the next morning , and then accompanied with them , and some other women , shee returned home to her owne house , faining that shee was not halfe well , and therefore made the speedyer returne . The Teniente growing now proud vpon the matter , thinking the next morning , which was Tuesday , to execute this his reuenge , Claudio in the meane while was not wanting , ( being aduised before hand that his Mistresse was now out of his danger , and safely arriued at her wished hauen ) intreated a Gentleman , a friend of his , to take the paines to goe and speake with the r r The principall Magistrate , and chiefe Commander in Sevill , is called there by the name of Assistence . Assistente of Sevill , and to craue so much lawfull fauour of him , that he would be pleased to come in person to the Court , and free him of that iniurie and wrong , which was so vniustly done vnto him . The Teniente likewise , when he was going to sit downe to dinner in his owne house , going aside to the window , and looking with a deuilish iealousie on those of Dorotea , he had her presently in his eye , and knew it was shee , and might plainely perceiue , how her husband and shee sate very louingly together eating of their dinner . He was almost beside him-selfe , and ready to runne mad , wondring with him-selfe , how this might be . Hereupon , he presently dispatches one away to the prison , to know who had freed the woman , that he had sent thither ouer night . Answer was made ; that shee was there . Then did he beat his feet against the ground , and stampt for despight and anger , and did verily perswade him-selfe , that he was not well in his wits , vnlesse the other had beene a dreame . So that day past on , till the next came , when ( at the accustomed houre ) comes me thither the Assistente him-selfe in person attended with his two Tenientes , and when he was sate in the seat of Iustice , he will'd that Claudio should be called forth , & the woman which was imprisoned with him . Who , when they were brought before him , and had ( according to their owne confession , as also the Keepers ) approu'd themselues to be the same , there was no man there but knew Sabina was his slaue , and so finding nothing to be said against them , they were set at libertie . Yet were they not so freed , but that Claudio paid soundly for it ; for when he came home , he found the greatest part of his house , and his goods burnt , and together with them a sister of his , one of those honest ones , that accompanied Dorotea from her house , who was found dead in the same bed with his Despensero , besides some three other of his seruants . This affront to his honour ( for that it was generally published throughout the whole Citie ) did so afflict his minde , and did in that manner oppresse his heart , that with the strong apprehension thereof hee fell grieuously sicke . And not desiring his health , that hee might take any worldly comfort in it , but onely that hee might liue to doe penance for this heynous sinne that hee had committed , by corrupting so good a creature , hee recouered of his sicknesse , and without making any one acquainted therewith , hee retyred him-selfe to the top of a mountaine in a desert place , where in a holy course of life hee ended his dayes , betaking him-selfe to the Religious Order of Saint Francis . Dorotea remayned with her husband in the same peace and loue as before , and the Teniente , like a filthy fellow as he was , without Doblones , for ought that they gaue him ; and without reuenge , for ought that hee could take of them . And Bonifacio ( honest man ) vntoucht in his honour . For Sabina , and most of them that knew the affront that was done him , dyed within a few dayes after . So iust is God in all his workes , and so well doth he know how to punish those wrongs , that are offered to the innocent .

With this Storie , and other entertainments , to passe away the time , we were brought by a faire winde to Spaine , which I had not a little longed for , for hauing lost our Anchors , our Ordnance , our Oares , our Helme carryed away , our sailes rent , and all our tackling torne , hauing nothing left which the Sea had not swallowed vp , onely I was left aliue , who ought more iustly to haue perished . We did dis-imbarke in Barcelona , where telling my friend Captaine Favelo , that I had made a vow , while we were in this storme , that I would not stay three nights in any part of Spaine , till I should come to Sevill , and visit the Image of our Lady del Valle , to whom I had offered vp my deuotions , and made a certaine promise to consecrate some thing vnto her , if I should be so happy as to escape that tempest . It grieu'd him to the very soule , that he should lose my companie , but I could not doe otherwise ; for I feared lest they of Genoa would come in pursuit of me in some Skiffe , or the like vessell . I bought three beasts for to carry my selfe and my trunkes , I entertained a seruant , and giuing out , that I was to goe my iourney ( no man knowing the contrary ) we tooke our leaue for euer .

The end of the second Booke of the second Part of Guzman de Alfarache .

THE ROGVE : OR , THE SECOND PART OF THE LIFE OF GUZMAN DE ALFARACHE . THE THIRD BOOKE . Wherein he relateth all the rest of his lewd and roguish life , from the time that he returned into Spaine , till he was condemned to the Galleys , where we must leaue him .

CHAPTER I.

Guzman de Alfarache , hauing taken his leaue of Captaine Favelo , telling him , that he was to goe for Sevill , makes for Saragoca , where he peruses the statutes of Gotam College , otherwise called , The Hospitall of Fooles .

WHEN a man ( out of some particular end knowne to himselfe ) hath a minde to grace a lye , for to How men use to grace their lyes . bring forth witnesses to credit his falshoods , he seekes out a fountaine , a lake , a stone , some mettall , tree , or hearbe , where-with he proues his vntruthes , and presently alledgeth for his authoritie , that he hath said nothing , but what stands with reason , and is made good by all those , that haue any in-sight in naturall Philosophie . And in this manner he quoteth a thousand witnesses ; he being the man that tells the lye , and layes the burthen of it on other mens shoulders . But I will runne a contrary course to this ; for I ( my selfe not lying ) shall tell you their lye ; not that I affirme it to be so ; but because it seemes to be so . And so it ought to be taken . For that Apollonius Tianeus takes it vpon himselfe , and sayes ; That he hath seene a stone , called Pantaura , which is the Queene of all other stones , 〈◊〉〈◊〉〈◊〉 of 〈◊〉 ●…ne Pant●…a . whereon the Sunne doth worke in that forcible manner , that it hath all the v●…es in it , that are to be found in all other stones whatsoeuer that are in the world , and that it worketh the same effects : And that as the Load-stone draweth the yron vnto it ; so this Pantaura , attracteth all other stones vnto it selfe , preseruing that partie from all kinde of poyson , that shall beare it abort him .

To this stone , we may very well , and with a great d●…e of reason , compare riche●… . For see what vertue there is in all other things , the same shall we finde Of ri●…es . in riches . It drawes all vnto it selfe , and preserueth the possessor thereof from all manner of poyson . It doth all in all ; it bringeth mighty things to passe ; it is a most fierce and cruell beast ; it ouercomes all ; treads downe all , that stands in its way ; and commands all . It makes euery thing stoope to its power ; it ●…ubjcteth the earth , and all that therein is . By riches , the fiercest beasts are 〈◊〉 ●…me ; no fish , though neuer so great , can resist riches ; nor the least of fishes , that hide them-selues in the concaues and hollow holes of the rocks , though ouer-whelmed with water , and drowned in the deepe , can escape its ●…orce ; nor can the fowles of the ayre , though of the swiftest and nimblest wing , 〈◊〉 from its Empire ; it exenterates , and pulls out the very bowels from the profoundest parts of the earth , vpon which the highest mountaines haue their foundation ; and it maketh dry the most hidden sands , which the Sea doth couer in her bottomlesse Abysse . What altitudes , hath not it abased ? What difficulties , hath not it ouercome ? What impossibilities , hath not it facilitated ? In what dangers , hath shee wanted safetie ? In what aduersitie , hath not shee found friends ? What thing hath shee desired , which shee hath not obtayned ? Or what Law hath shee made , which hath not beene obeyed ? And being , as it is , so venomous a poyson , that not onely like the Basiliske , by being beheld by vs , it killeth our bodies ; but by a bare desire onely ( being coueted ) destroyeth our soules , damning them for euer to the bottomlesse pit of Hell ; yet shee her-selfe is a treacle to the harme we receiue from her , and a counterpo●… , Of the use of 〈◊〉 . to that venome , where-with shee infecteth our soules and conscience , if he that possesseth riches , can ( as of an Antidote , or some pretious preseruat●… make 〈◊〉 vse thereof . Riches , in its owne nature , and in it selfe , hath 〈◊〉 ●…ur , 〈◊〉 knowledge , nor power , nor valour , nor any other good , 〈◊〉〈◊〉 na●…e 〈◊〉〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉〈◊〉 punishment , nor glory , more then that , whereunto , they that doe pos●…e it , doe direct it . It is like vnto the Cameleon , which assumeth the colour of that thing , on which it settles its selfe : Or of the nature of that water of the Lake Fenco ; of which the Arcadians report , that he that drinketh thereof ouernight , growes sicke ; but he that takes it after the Sunne is once vp , waxeth well . He that shall liue in idlenesse , heaping vp treasure by night , that is , secretly scraping a great deale of wealth together , ouer-charging his conscience there-with , he sure shall be sicke : But he that shall vse them in the day time , and show them to the light , that his workes may shine before men , and that he come with a cleare conscience , hauing the stomacke of his soule empty of sin , and his conscience not ouer-clogg'd with worldly cares , this man shall be made whole . Neither is the rich man condemned , nor the poore man saued , for that the one is rich , and the other poore : but onely because the rich man abuseth his riches , and the poore man his pouertie . For if the rich man treasures vp , and the poore couer , neither is the rich man rich , nor the poore man poore ; The best and truest richer . and both are to be condemned . But that may be called the best and the truest riches , which being possessed , is despised . Fpr riches serue onely ( at least should ) to releeue our owne necessities , to communicate with the good , and to distribute amongst our friends . The better and greater pare , which rich men haue of riches , is the lester part , in regard they are so occasionall in men , inciting them ( especially if their hearts be once set vpon them ) to this , or that other Prouerbe . sinne . Ill desires , beget ill doings . Riches in its owne nature , is a very sweet thing : To this , mans appetite hath a sweet tooth , and a greedy gaping after it . And as it is in the Prouerb ; La mançana a a La mançana cor●…e peligro en las pujas del erizo . Of Gods prouidence . corre peligro en las pujas del erizo ; that Apple is in great danger , that stickes on the prickles of a Hedge-hogs backe .

The Diuine prouidence ( for our greater good ) being to diuide and distribute its gifts , not laying all the weight of them vpon one side , thought good to repart them in different manner , and on different persons , to the end , that all might be saued . This Prouidence made both the rich and the poore . To the rich she gaue temporall goods ; to the poore , spirituall blessings : to the end , that the rich man distributing his riches to the poore , might thereby purchase Gods fauour ; and so remaining both equall , might equally gaine heauen ; which is to be opened with a golden key ; to wit , with riches , by vsing them How heauen gate is to be opened . well : And sometimes likewise this doore of heauen is to be opened with a picklocke ; that is , by dispensing our goods to the poore : Yet notwithstanding , doth not man , onely for that he has more , thereby merit more : but because he more despiseth then desireth . For , without comparison , much more is the riches of a poore man that is contented , then of a rich man that is neuer satisfied . He possesseth them , that is not possessed by them ; hee is rich that seekes not after riches ; and he hath most store , that is the least storer . This is the only man whom we may truly tearme rich , wise , and honourable .

And if the wiseman would vse his wisedome well , and would measure that Nature contented with a little . which he hath need of , with that which he hath , nature would content it selfe with a little ; and euen in that little , would hee find an ouerplus . But because the foole inlargeth the cord , and would imbrace that which he hath , according to that which he desireth , God so orders this measure , that though he had all whatsoeuer the world containes , yet should he still be poore . To him that The couetous man neuer contented , and therefore neuer rich . is not contented , nothing is enough ; To a hauing mind , all is too little ; wanting much , by hauing too much . The eye of a couetous man , will neuer say , no more then will the Sea , or Hell , Yame hasta . Now I haue enough . Rich , and wise , shalt thou be , when thou liu'st so within thy compasse , that hee that knowes thee , should admire the little , that thou hast , and the much , that thou spendest : and when it shall not cause any wonder in thee , to see what little meanes thou hast to liue , and what great possessions other men inioy .

Thou seest me here now rich , very rich , and in Spaine ; but farre worse , then How it fared with Guzman now he was rich . I was before ; for if before , pouerty made me too impudent ; why riches hath now made me too confident . If I could but haue contented my selfe , or had I but had the temper of a well gouern'd man , I could neuer haue wanted ; but because I neither did the one , nor knew the other , for to get money I endanger'd my body , and hazarded my soule . I was neuer contented , neuer satisfied , neuer at quiet with my selfe . And for that I led an idle kind of life , and was not willing to take any paines , ( vnlesse it were in roguery ) I lost that with ease , which I got with much labour . I was like vnto that wheele which conuayes water to your Aqueducts , no sooner full , but presently empty . I cared little for money , kept it lesse , but alwaeys imploy'd it ill . My money was the price of bloud , it was spent vpon Sepultures for dead bodies , on dead workes , and worldly vices . This was the vse I put it to , and therefore it is no maruell , if it thriu'd no better with me . Easily it came , and easily it went . And in the end I lost both it , and my selfe , as you shall heare hereafter .

Flying from that mischiefe , that might follow me , I went out of Barçelona , Guzman , how he goes out of Barçelona . forsaking the rode-way , going by by-pathes from place to place , betaking my selfe to vnknowne trackes . I gaue out that I was to goe to Sevill , I framed excuses , to be the better beleeued . I talkt of the Vowes that I had made , and inuented a thousand other lyes ; and for no other cause in the world , then to defeat the Spies of their purpose , and that they might not know what was become of me , nor find the pricking of the Hare , that was now so farre before the hounds . The Mules were mine owne , my seruant a new-comer , and vnacquainted with my trickes . I trauail'd which way it pleased me , according as my minde serued Prou●…rbe . me , or as it came first in my head ; here to day , and to b b Oy a qui , masiana en Francia . morrow in France , without staying in any one set-place ; and alwayes changing my cloaths : for I came not to any place where I might change my apparell , but I did it , being of no great charge , not passing a hundred Crownes or there-abouts .

In this manner did I trauaile ouer all that Countrey , till I came to Saragoça , Guzman comes to Saragoça . receiuing no small contentment , that I was safely arriued in that noble and famous Citie . According as my youthfulnesse did pricke me on , my money hold out , and the Dames did incite me , so did I continue there some few dayes , though all , and many more had beene too little for to view and enioy it's greatnesse : So fayre and strong were the buildings , so good the gouernment , so His like , and dislike of Saragoça . great the prouision , all things so good cheape , and those reasonable rates , that me thought it had a smatch of Italy . In one only thing I found it very strange , and to my seeming , at the first sight , somewhat terrible : which was the harder for me to digest , and the worse to be endured , for that I knew not the cause of it . And it was , to see , how men , knowing the condition of those women , and that euery little occasion is sufficient for them to make their longings lawes , forming The custome in Saragoça concerning widowes . bodies of shadowes , would put a bridle vpon them , lest by losing that decorum & respect which they owe to their deceased husbands , assuming too much libertie vnto them , they were likely to stumble on a thousand blockes , that might be an occasion of their falling , and cause them to runne on headlong to the vtter ruine of their reputation , which in a woman being once lost , is neuer againe to be recouered .

It was my hap to walke through a spatious street , which they call , the Cosso , which though it made a fayre show , yet was it much graced by a handsome widow , that was young and well-fauoured , and to my seeming of good both wealth and qualitie . I made a stand to view her ; she likewise stood still , and would not away : she knew well enough of what disease I was sicke , but would take no notice of it , nor made any other semblance or show vnto mee , then as if neyther I or shee had beene there , or as if wee had not seene one another . I made more turnes about her window , then a horse doth about a Mill ; ( for they are not a few , that vse daily the like kinde of fooleries , ) yet did shee not show her selfe eyther coy or scornfull vnto mee , or that she was offended with me for it . Nor did I once offer to speake a word vnto her , till at last , shee seeming ( me thought ) vnto me , to waxe weary of this my foolish silence : I conceiued that she said to her selfe , what painted timbrell is this ? what Peece without powder , that hath made me wait here these two long houres , and making still proffers , as though hee would shoot , hath not yet discharged his musket , nor so much as once opened his mouth . With that shee went her way ; and I stood looking Prouerbe . when she should returne : being now fully resolued to let flye c c Perd●…r vn v●…te , p●…●…endat el 〈◊〉 . another arrow , to see if I could finde the former that I had lost ; but she came no more in play , and so I mist the marke that I meant to haue shot at . I went home to my lodging , and demanded of mine Hoste , what she was ; but as it were accidentally , and in a carelesse kinde of fashion , without any the least show that I did it of set purpose , or for any interest of mine owne , giuing him such markes and tokens , whereby he might guesse whom I meant .

This Gentle-woman ( said mine Hoste ) is a widow , and that not one , but many wayes , exceeding faire and beautifull . I would needs know of him how . He told me , so many , that euery particular fairnesse in her , were a sufficient b●…utifying to any other woman . She is fayre ( as you see ) in her face , shee is l●…kewise ●…yre in her I i●…ge , being of the best descent in this Citie ; she is also fry 〈◊〉 her wealth ●…es , hauing much of her owne , and much by her husband ; and abo●… all , most fayre in her discretion , for therein especially doth her beauty exceed . I saw the pot d d Tan ●…na esta la med●…da , que 〈◊〉 de vert●… . was so full , that I was afraid , it would runne Prouerbe . ouer ; and therefore I said vnto mine Hoste , that he might not runne him-selfe out of breath ; How comes it then to passe , if she be of that ranke and quality , as you say she is , that her friends and kinsfolke doe giue way , that such a worthy Gentlewoman , should runne such a deale of hazard , as she does ; for youth , beauty , riches , and liberty , can hardly walke out their stations without tripping , Guzman arg●…es with his Hoste about this custome . if not falling . How much better and safer were it , both for them , and her , to get her another good husband , and cause her to marry , then to suffer her to liue in this dangerous state of widowhood . Whereunto mine Hoste replide ; you say well Sir , but this cannot be done , but to her great losse and hinderance ; for that very day , that she shall betake her selfe to a second mariage , shee is to lose all the estate , which shee had by her former husband , which is no small matter . But continuing still a widow , she shall be Vsufructuary of all that he left her , and enioy it as long as she liues .

Then said I , O how hard a condition , how rigorous a clause is this ? How much better were it to deale with this Gentlewoman , and such other as she is , as they vse to doe in Italy , whose husbands , when they dye , leaue their wiues a large Legacy , disposing it in that manner , that it be paid vnto them at the day of their mariage , declaring thereby , that they meerely left it them to that end . And this they doe , to the end that they may enioy so great a benefit by a second mariage , whereby their state shall not onely be aduanced , but their honor likewise secured , which otherwise might chance to receiue some scandall . I was pressing this argument a little more home vnto him ; but he interrupted me Prouerbe . and answered thus vnto me . Sir , hath not you worship oft heard say ; En cada tierra su vso ; Euery e e En cada tierra , su vso . Country hath his custome ? This goes currant here , and that in Italy . And that other I am sure is not vnknowne vnto you ; Cada loco , Prouerbe . en su f f Cada loco , sabe mas en su casa , que el cuerdo en el agena . casa sabe mas , que el cuerdo en el agena ; Euery foole is wiser in his owne house , then a wise man is in anothers . Whereunto I replyde ; If here bee no better Law then this , and if people shall suffer them-selues to bee gouerned in this manner , I know well enough what I say , I tell you plainly , I like not of it , nor can I by any meanes approue it . And to this end it is also said , Al mal vso , Prouerbe . quebrarle la pierna . A bad Custome is better broken then kept . The legs of it ᵍ Al mal vso , quebrarle la pierna . Bad customes not to be kept . are to be broken , that it may not stand any more in force . A holy , good and iust Law , ought to be grounded on reason . I am of your minde ( said mine Hoste ) but they that are more learned , then I am , would peraduenture giue you better satisfaction then I can . Yet in my opinion , it seemeth to carry some force with it ; and I am verily perswaded , that that which moued them to make this Law , was ; not that a widow might not marry , but that being a widow , shee might not liue in want ; and to take away all occasion , left for lacke of conuenient maintenance , according to the condition of her qualitie , she might fayle in her obligation , and vse that ill , which was instituted for good : so that the fault is the womans , though the punishment be the mans .

This mine honest Hoste , did not halfe satisfie me with this ( as he thought ) his sound reason : whereupon , I entred into a discourse , thinking with my selfe , what kinde of creatures these women be ; who if you leade them by euill wayes , they turne euill ; if by good , worse ; and neuer shall you come to know what to make of them . They h h Muger , el mal ò el bien de su casa . Guzman discourseth of women . are the making or the marring of their Prouerbe . house : The establishers , or the destroyers thereof . In their running they trip , and in going they fall . And therefore their name sutes well with their nature ; being for this cause , called Woman , because she is a woe to man . She hath a smooth skinne , but a harsh nature ; a soft tongue , but a hard heart ; silken words , but sowtage deeds . They seemed ( me thought ) vnto me , ( pardon the coursnes of my comparison ) to be like vnto straw , which if you let it stand in the field in its naturall place , without laying it in such rooms , where it ought to be kept , it is preserued by the winde and raine ; but if you restraine and straiten it , clapping it vp close in some little priuate lodging , it will shoote it selfe out , and breake through the walls ; nor shall you reape any other good of it , then that sowre iuice which it will yeeld you , like vnto that of the sowre Orange , affording much bitternesse , but no benefit . They know not how to keepe a meane in their actions , and lesse in their loue or hate : Nor euer yet could they vse a moderation in their crauings and desirings . That much which they receiue , they thinke it still too little ; and that little which they giue , they alwaies thinke it too much . They are generally couetous ; yet notwithstanding all these faults , naked is that house i i Des dichada la casa , don de 〈◊〉 faldas faltan where there is neuer a wife . All will reele , where the Reele goes not . Where there is neuer a k k Donde no ay chapines , no ay cosa b●…en puesta . white apron , there is no Prouerbe . good order , the meat ill drest , and the table sluttish . As the breath of man doth vphold houses , that they runne not to ruine and decay ; so the steps of a well gouernd huswife , doth preserue and multiply wealth : And as a good Chine of Bacon , makes glorious porrige ; and as a man becomes the streets ; so doth a Prouerbe . woman adorne the house .

But this is not a place to treat of their vertues . I come vnto mine owne , which at that time were more then the vertues of Tobacco . I continued a while discoursing with mine Host , who made me a la ge relation of many things concerning that Citie , as of its priuiledges and liberties , from which conuersation of his , I receiued so much content , and was so attentiue to his talke , that I would haue forgone any other intertainment , to haue inioyed this his pleasing discourse . I may thanke my sinnes that had brought me thither . I had taken an extreame cold in the Galley , which I was not yet well rid of ; and finding my head st●…t , I pluck't a handkercher out of my pocket , and blew my nose , which I h●…d no sooner pull'd thence , but I opened it , and look't thereupon , as if that Oyster had afforded me a pearle , it being the manner and fashion of that Countrey so to doe , ( contrarie to the rule of good manners ) being a no lesse slouenlie , then common tricke amongst them .

The crafty Rogue mine Hoste , perceiuing why I did it , and that I made , as it were , a sc●…ffe of their customes , being a good speaker ( as hee was ) a proper handsome fellow , and a pleasant ; speaking in a low voyce , and nodding his head towards me , softly said vnto me ; Flie , Sir , flie ; Hide your selfe , as soone as you can : Quickly , quickly , I say . Poore and miserable man that I was , O these his words , how ill did they sound in mine eares ! O how my heart was Guzman , put into a n●…edlesse feare by mine Hostes meanes . scorcht with them , like the Partridge that is first singed in the fire , and afterwards to be put presently on the spit ! My feathers were singed , and my pride abated . Hee had scarce made an end of his words , when at two leapes , I had got me behinde the curtaines of the bed . He being ignorant of my villanies , thought that I had done this innocently , and out of simplicitie , as being startled with the sodainnesse thereof : and so instantly breaking out into a loud laughter , he merrily said vnto me ; I perceiue , Sir , you are not troubled with the Gout : by my faith Sir , you are a nimble actiue Gentleman : your Worship may now come forth , if you please ; as God would haue it , it is nothing : the storme is past , the coast cleare , and you may safely shew your selfe vpon the hatches . I came forth from thence as pale as ashes , my colour was quite gone , and death appeared in my face ; and did much wonder at my selfe , considering the g●…eat feare and pe●…turbation I then was in , that the sodaine astonishment , and the aff●…ight i●… had put me into , had not made me to leap out of the window into the street .

I came out at last , but whether more amazed , or ashamed , I cannot tell you ; but I sought to dissemble it the best I could , that I might not raise vp that dust which might chance to put out mine eies . Being now come againe to my selfe , I ask't him what was the mysterie of this , and what he meant by it : I pray Sir said he , content your selfe , rest you quiet , and giue me presently two shillings from you . I put my hand in my pocket , and threw him forth a Royall , and when I saw he was quiet , hauing by this time laught him-selfe weary , I began a-fresh to aske him , why he demanded two shillings of me , and what was that , that had passed before , when he bid me flie , and goe hide my selfe ? Hee falling into a new vaine of laughing , louder then before , looking cheerily and merrily vpon mee , said vnto mee : Sir , I haue here a Procuration substituted by the Administrators of an Hospitall , for the recouering of certaine duties and rights of those , which come to my house , which I am to challenge of them , if they commit any forfeyture , contayned in the said Procuration . From this time forward , your Worship may goe ouer all the world by vertue of these my Letters Patent , without any farther molestation to your person , or your purse . With this Royall , you haue paid for your entrance , and haue free licence to be gone , when you list . When I heard him tell me this , what with that was A tale of a Gentle-woman , that marryed with a new Christian. past , and what with this present gamball , I was so confounded there-with , that that might be said to me , which was to a Gentle-woman , that is well knowne , who hauing matcht her-selfe with a new Christian , for that he was rich , and shee poore ; who being with childe by him , and finding her-selfe ( it being the first that shee had gone withall ) out of ease , and in much paine , talking with another Gentle-woman that was an acquaintance and friend of hers ; shee said vnto her ; In good faith , I finde my selfe so ill , that I know not what to say vnto it . I was neuer in my life , in that l l Tene●… el Iudio en el ●…uerpo That is ; estar con miedo : To be in a great feare . Covarr . verb. Iudio , pag. 492. Iewish taking , as I am now in . No maruaile Prouerbe . ( said the other ) hauing a Iew within you ; and bearing him about you ( as you doe ) in your bodie . And in good faith , my selfe ( like this Gentle-woman ) was in that feare at that time , that if mine Hosts laughing and iesting with me , had not quickly rid me of this doubt , I verily beleeue , I should haue fallen downe dead for feare . His breath , put breath into me ; his liuelinesse , life : And seeing him thus set vpon the merry pin , I said vnto him ; m m A common oath , or asseueration in Spaine : English , Body of me . Cuerpo de mi : As I am an honest man ; since I haue paid the penaltie , I will know , by your leaue , what is the fault I haue committed . For that Iudges sentence is rigorous and vniust , that shall condemne me in charges , for that which I neuer did , and shall not giue me a discharge for it . For it may be , that both parties being heard , my money may be return'd me backe againe . Because your Worship ( saies mine Host ) seemes to be a worthy discreet Gentle-man , I will reade vnto you a bede-roll of such statutes as I haue here for the recouery of those amercements , and those penalties , wherewith they are to be punished , who incurre the danger of them . This Royall is a fee , that goes to the Beedle for your entrance . Only I shall intreat your Worship to haue the patience to stay a while , till I shall goe runne , and fetch it you . He went his way , and returnes againe in a trice , bringing a great booke with him vnder his arme , wherein he said , he did set downe the admittance , or matriculation of those that were made free of that Incorporation , and taking out some few sheets of paper , that lay loose in the booke , he began to reade some of their statutes and ordinances , whereof I will repeat such vnto you , as remaine in my memory , with a protestation which I make vnto you , to acquaint you with those few hereafter , which shall occurre to my remembrance . And they speake after this manner .

The statutes and constitutions of Gotam Colledge , OR The Hospitall of Fooles .

WE REASON , absolute Monarch , and sole Soueraigne of the world , not acknowledging any superiour , or in any sort equall vnto vs , for the redressing and reforming of mens manners , against the obstinate and peruerse wilfulnesse of folly , and all other her wickednesse , which hath taken such deep root , and multiplied it selfe in that abundance , to our notable hurt and detriment , the preiudice of our Royall prerogatiue , and the great damage of all mankinde ; for to auoyd those greater inconueniences , which the corruption of so dangerous and spreading a canker may cause , that it may not creepe more and more vpon our louing subiects ( whose welfare and safetie we tender as our owne ) and that it may not dilate it selfe any farther , to their vtter vndoing , and finall destruction ; We will and command , haue and doe ordaine , as also doe publish and proclaime these our Lawes , to all those that are already borne , or shall be borne hereafter in succeeding ages , by the power of our Regall authoritie , and by the generall consent of our Councell of State , that they be taken and held for such , as are now by vs established and confirmed , and that they be punctually kept , religiously obserued , and fully cumplyde withall , both in all , and euery the least point or parcell , herein specified , or contained , as you will answer it to your perill , and incurre that grieuous punishment , which to those that shall violate and infringe these our Lawes , is in that case prouided .

Moreouer , because the first thing that we are in our princely care to consider of , is , that all due , fitting , and conuenient prouision be made , for the quicke expedition , and good execution of Iustice , we in our wisdome haue thought it meet , to nominate and appoint certaine Officers , of good both sufficiencie , and trust , such as shall be requisite and needfull for this so weighty and important a businesse , And therefore we do depute , nominate , and assigne for Iudges , good Policie , Curiositie , and Solicitude ; to the end , that they , as if it were vs our selfe , and as representing vs in our owne proper person , may truly and vprightly administer iustice , giuing them by vertue of our power , full , & plenary authoritie , to apprehend , set at libertie , and punish , any manner of person , or persons whatsouer vpon iust cause , referring our said Iudges to be ordered and directed by these our lawes and ordinances , and not to differ from the true intent and meaning of them , to the damnifying of the subiect , and the dishonouring of vs . Furthermore , both for the present , & euer here-after , do we substitute as elder Brothers of this Fraternitie , & chiefe Wardens of this Incorporation , all those that be iealous obseruers , euery one according to his place and merit , and he that shall be most iealous , shall be most honoured . Our Atturney Generall , shall be Diligence , and our Bedle , that shall warne them to the Court , shall be Fame .

First of all therefore , any person , or persons , that shall goe walking and talking 1 to them-selues in the streets , or shall doe the like , when they are all alone , or at home in th●…ir priuate houses , we condemne them for fooles for three mon●…ths , within which terme of time , we will and command , that they abstaine therefro , and reforme this their foolery . And in case , they shall not amend this fault , our pleasure is , that for the better accomplishment thereof , they haue a longer and more peremptory time set them downe , of some three Termes , or more ; within which limited time , they shall bring in a certificate of their said reformation and amendment , vpon paine of being held for approued , attainted , and conuicted fooles , and accordingly command our foresaid elder Brothers , and Ancients of the Company to bring in their euidence , & to find them guilty , & to see them afterwards seuerely punished , as violaters & breakers of our Lawes .

Item , They that shall walke through any publike or priuate place , that is paued 2 with bricke , or with stone , and shall goe with a great deale of care and studie , pitching either their toes , or their heeles , in such a direct line , side , or corner of the said bricks , or stones , shall be condemned in the same punishment as aforesaid .

Item , They that walking along the streets , casting their cloake vnder one arme , and stretching out their hand , or their finger , shall goe , as they passe 3 along , either patting the wall , or making streakes , and Indentures with their fingers ends , let them be admitted schollers of our said House or Colledge ; prouided alwayes , that they haue six moneths of approbation granted vnto them ; In which time , we command them to be reformed . Otherwise , and in default thereof , we haue already ordayned , and doe now ordayne ; That the Warden , Sub-warden , or Deane of this our Colledge , and in their absence , the Seniorfellow , put his coat vpon him ( according to the custome of the House ) his cap , and his bable , and other ornaments belonging to his degree , and euer afterwards be held a professed foole .

Item , They that shall play at bowles , or at billiards , when they haue throwne out their bowle , if by chance it shall runne awry , and that they with it , shall also 4 wry their body ; thinking , that which way they leane , the bowle should run inclining to that side , and gouerne it selfe , as they direct it with these their mimick gestures , shall dye in this their sin ; and we must declare them for brothers already professed . And we further command , that the like be also vnderstood of those , who vse the like Apish action , seeing something fall downe from some high place to the ground , shrinking their shoulders , wrying their mouthes , or turning vp the whites of their eyes . And likewise of those , who hauing vizards on their faces ( as in masks and reuels ) shall vnder those , goe making of strange gesticulations , either by frowning , or smiling , or biting of the lip , as if in so doing , it did really and truly seeme vnto them , that these variations , and alterations of their countenances , were taken notice of by some outward appearance , when as being thus masked , it is impossible , that any inward gesture of theirs should be outwardly discerned . And of those , who do counterfeit and imitate the like , not knowing whether they doe the same or no. Or if in cutting out some thing with a bad paire of sheeres , or with a dull-edged knife , or taking paines with any the like vntoward instrument , they shall draw their mouth on t 'one side like a Plaice ; lill out their tongue , like a Calfe ; wrinckle vp their cheekes , forehead and eyes , like a scorched peece of parchment , and such Idiot-like postures , our will and pleasure is , that they in like manner , shall take the degree of fooles .

Item , They , who expecting their seruant , ( hauing sent him forth on an errand ) if in case he be somewhat long a comming , shall stay waiting for him at 5 the doores , or windowes of his house , thinking that by his staying there for him , he will make the more haste , and come the sooner , we condemne all such to retract and acknowledge their errour , vpon paine , that in case they shall refuse so to doe , they be seuerely proceeded against .

Item , They that draw their cards with a great deale of leysure , seeking by degrees , by a little & a little , to discouer at this , or that other corner , first whether 6 it colour right , and afterwards , discoursing and arguing the case , whether it be such or such a card , they them-selues knowing for certaine , that for all this their laborious lingring and delay , they shall neuer a whit the sooner encounter , or misse , then if they had presently taken it vp , and made show thereof , as soone as it was dealt into their hand ; we condemne them to the same acknowledgment , as aforesaid . And for some causes mouing vs thereunto , we haue thought fit , to giue them free leaue and licence , without incurring any farther penalty , to follow their ancient custome ; but with this condition ; That as oft , as he , or they , offending in this manner , shall see an Ancient of the house , or passe by his chamber doore , he shall make an acknowledgment of this his error , by putting off his hat .

Item , They that are gotten vp into some vpper roome , and either sitting or standing in some window , or open gallery , shall from thence spit downe ; whether 7 it be thereby to take ( as it were with a plummet ) the euennesse of the building ; or to see , if he can make his spittle to light iust vpon such a stone , or some one marke or other , which his eye hath chosen out ; we strictly charge and command them , that they retract and reforme this their folly , and that vpon short warning , vpon paine of being taken for publike professors of the same .

Item , They who trauayling vpon the way , shall inquire of those passengers , 8 whom they meet withall , how farre it is to such a baiting-place , or to such a Towne , thinking , that by this their asking , they shall the sooner reach vnto it , we condemne them in the like penalty , inioyning them for penance , the badnes of the way , the Carryers iading of them , and mine Hosts cozening of them : Not inflicting any greater punishment , out of the hope of their amendment .

Item , They who when they make water , goe streaking the walls with their 9 vrine , as if they were busie about some curious delineations , or framing some Antick-figures , or shall pisse in the dust , making I know not what scattering angles , and Circles ; or in some chinke in a wall , or little hole in the ground ; We will and command , that they doe so no more , vpon paine ( in case they shall perseuere therein ) to be punished by their Iudge , and deliuered ouer to an elder Brother , or one of the Ancients of the House .

Item , They who when they heare the clocke strike , count not the houres , but aske others , what 's a clocke ; it being more fit and facile for them , to tell it 10 them selues . Which carelesnesse of theirs , proceedeth often times from the abundance of a cholericke kinde of humour ; We therefore , strictly charge and command all such , that they haue an especiall care of their health , and in case they be poore , and not able to be at the charge of physicke , that then one of the Masters of our Hospitall , cause them to be carryed thither , giuing order that some preparatiues be prouided for them of wilde Cherries , or sharpe sowre Orange , lest otherwise they might runne the danger of losing their wits , and quickly turne either fooles , or mad men .

Item , They who haue but a little meat before them , and many mouthes a going , shall diuert themselues from their feeding , to entertaine the company with 11 this tale , or that d●…scourse , taking more pleasure ( like a sort of pratling fooles as they are ) to fill other mens eares , then their owne bellies ; by which meanes they often rise a hunger'd : For as much , as these are dyde in the woll , and come ready drest to our hands , we remit them to be registred amongst your incurable fooles . And therefore command , that there be an especiall care taken of them . For these are in the 7th degree , and are almost in their full height to be taken .

Item , They who out of couetousnesse , or any other cause or reason whatsoeuer , so as they be not driuen thereunto of force and necessitie , ( for in such cases , 12 Lawes are not to be kept ) when they goe to market , buy the worser sort of victuals for the sauing of their purse , and spending the lesse in their houses ; as if a Physitian , an Apothecary , or a Barber-Surgeon ( who all the yeare long come to your houses , to cure those diseases , which were caused by bad and vnwholesome meats ) were not dearer by much , then any the best meat they could buy : We condemne them to a generall disgracing of them-selues , declaring them ( as before declared ) to be professed fooles ; forbidding them from henceforth to doe the like , vpon paine of being committed ouer to the Curate , Sexton , or Graue-maker of his , or their Parish , to be punished either more , or lesse , according to the hurt that shall grow thereby .

Item , They who in the summer-nights , as also some in the winter , sit , or stand , till their breech , or their feet ake , in some open Court or Tarasse , gaping and 13 gazing on the heauens , and from the clouds of the ayre , goe forming the figures of Serpents , and the shapes of Lyons , and so of other beasts , we pronounce and declare them to be brothers of this Fraternitie : But if in this kinde of sort , or the like manner , they shall thus entertaine them-selues with these bables , that they may thereby , giue place and time in their owne houses , assome vse to doe for their owne interest and priuate gaine , that they may see the signe of Taurus , Aries , and Capricorne , which is a most foule and dishonest case , we condemne them ( though accounted of the Brotherhood ) not to be capable of the priuileges thereof , nor that they be admitted into their Senate-house , nor that they haue any waxe lights allowed them on Festiuall dayes .

Item , They who wearing either blacke shooes , or white , or of any other coloured 14 veluet , shall , for to take away the dust from them , or to giue them a better glasse , make them cleane with their cloake , as if that were not of a more noble and better condition , and much more costly , and that for to make them cleane and handsome , they shall leaue that foule and dustie , we condemne them for neat fooles . And in case they be Noble-men , for their greater honour , we will haue them to be taken for three-piled fooles .

Item , They who hauing past some few dayes , without seeing their friends and 15 acquaintance , when afterward , meeting one another by chance , they say each to other ; Are you aliue Sir ? Is it possible , that there should be any such man vpon the face of the earth ? Which notwithstanding that it be a kinde of indearing of a mans loue , yet must we haue them inrolled amongst the rest , being there are other more proper formes of salutation , without asking a man , whether he be vpon earth , or aliue , when as he was neuer yet in heauen , and sees him stand iust before him . And we farther will and command , that all such haue a signe , or marke of Admiration , set vpon them ; and that ( during our pleasure ) they neuer goe without it .

Item , They who after the hearing of Masse , and when they haue made an end of their Ave-Maries , at the tingling of the bell , or at any other houre , when a 16 signe is giuen in the Church , that Seruice is ended , shall say to such a one ; I kisse your hands Sir , howbeit this phrase of speech is supposed to be no other then an acknowledgment of thanks , the other hauing bowed his body towards him , or giuen him the good day , or good night ; yet notwithstanding we condemne them for fooles , and command them to abiure this manner of speaking , vpon punishment that they shall carry this name with them to their graue , and while they liue , be pointed at for their folly , for that they more esteeme of a false and lying beza las manos , I kisse your hands ( which they neuer kisse , nor would kisse them , though they were the Bishops hands , and much lesse those of other inferiour persons , whereof some haue them full of scabs , of scurfe , or leprosie , and other some , with nayles either ready to drop off , or full of n n The Spanish word is ; Vn̄●…s cayreladas . The French renders it , Ongles si lanternes , & si salement colorez . durt , looking like Caveary , that they would be ready to turne a mans stomacke ) then to say , God giue you good night , or good morrow . And the like command , we lay vpon those , who make answer with the like salutation , at another mans sneezing , when they may as well say , God blesse you .

Item , They who come to a mans house to inquire for him , and asking whether 17 he be within , or no ; it being answered vnto him , or them , that he is not within , but is gone abroad , returne a second time to reply : Is he then gone abroad ? we condemne them as rebels , and contumacious people , for repeating that demand , whereof they had already satisfaction .

Item , They who hauing hit their shin , or their toes against some sharpe stone , by stumbling vnawares vpon it , and with a great deale of fleame , and full of 18 choller , returne backe againe to looke vpon it at leysure with a fixed eye , and a troubled minde , we condemne them in the same penaltie , and command them , either to remoue it out of the way , or that they doe not offer to looke vpon it , vpon paine of farther increasing their punishment .

I●…e , They , who blowing their nose , in the taking away of their handkercher , 19 looke steadily vpon it , and pry into it , as if some pear'es had dropt from thence , and that they would safely lap them vp for feare of losing , we condemne the●… for brothers of our said foundation , and that as oft as they shall offend in this fault , they giue an almes to the Hospitall of incurable ●…les , grounding our reason of this ●…ulct vpon this , that they shall hereafter haue others doe ●…s much for them .

When he was come thus farre , me thought he wanted onely the bell to toll him off . I was ready to burst my heart with laughing , and the bede-roll was so long , that I would not suffer him to goe on any further , and therefore interrupting him in his reading , I said vnto him ; Now ( my good Hoste ) seeing you haue done me the fauour to aduise me of these things , that I may thereby know how to correct my errors ; tell me I pray you , where-abouts this Hospitall is , who is the Principall , and what lands and rents belong vnto it . Sir ( said mine Hoste ) for that there are so many diseased and sicke persons , and that the Hospitall is incapable , and poore , considering the few that are well , and the many that are sicke ; it was agreed vpon , that they should change their lodgings and be scattered vp and downe in diuers other places , so that now all the world in a manner appertaines to this Hospitall . Where then ( said I vnto him ) shall those discreet and wise men , that remaine yet vntouched , be so conueniently lodged , that they may be out of the danger of this infection ? Hereunto hee made answer , I heare ( Sir ) that there is but one onely man in all the world , that is free from this contagion ; but as yet I could neuer learne who that one should be . Euery particular man , thinkes that he is this sound party , but few , besides him-selfe , will beleeue it .

The certainest newes that I can giue you hereof , is , That there is a great Enginer lately found out , that will vndertake to put into an egge-shell , as many as shall be absolutely free of this disease , and does farther make offer , that together with their persons , he will likewise thrust into the said egge-shell , all their goods , lands , and rents , and that notwithstanding all this , they shall haue so much elbow-roome , that they shall scarce touch one another . I could hold no longer , but must needs tell him ; This ( mine Hoste ) is a malitious interpretation , and a matter of meere waggerie , and no lesse large then the Hospitall it selfe . But , being well considered , I find that it is very true ; in regard we are all of vs but men , and haue all sinned in our father Adam . Our conuersation had continued somewhat longer , and we should haue made an end of reading of the statutes of the said house , if the night had not hasted away so fast . Besides , I had a great desire to haue another fling at the widow , and did long to fetch a turne or two before her lodging , to see how the world went there . So leauing the rest to the next dayes reading , I willed my seruant to bring mee a Guzman goes by night abroad about the City . very gallant sute of cloathes , which I had in my truncke , and taking my sword vnder mine arme , I went out of the house , and walkt about the City , seeking my fortune . I went stalking through those streetes in a carelesse kinde of fashion , with a minde so well ●…sed , and a heart so contented , that I would not haue chang'd my present state , with any Prince in Christendome ; thinking my selfe to bee such a tall fellow of my hands , that no man was able to stand in my way .

At the winding of a corner , where two streets met together , and made a crosse , I met with a couple of young wenches , the one was a reasonable handsome He meetes with two w●…s . one , and might very well haue seru'd the turne ; the other , seemed to be her seruant . I made towards them , and they did not step aside ; I stopt them in their way , and they stood still . I began to talke and discourse with them , and they with me , and in that kind and courteous manner , that I was as it were rauished with their company . I could not put any question to this Gentlewoman , whereunto shee had not a ready answer ; shee would not giue an inch of her ground , nor let any Card that came from me , passe without a Vye . There was not any one word , that could come amisse to her . I went about to dis-inwrap her hands of her mantle , that I might come to touch them ; but the crafty hyleding , seeming somewhat squeamish , straining courtesie , did in a pretty kind of fashion faigne a defending of her selfe from that friendly violence , yet did she not make any great hasty retreat , but did suffer me to come on in that cunning manner , and was so nimble finger'd withall , that in that short space of time , that I was busying my hands about her face , and her brest , she with hers was not idle , but putting them into my pocket , tooke thence that little , that I had . I was hot vpon the businesse , and in this heat of mine , I had no feeling His w●… cozens him . of this ache ; nor had it beene possible for me to haue beene sensible of it , had I taken the best care , that I could . For , at such times , and vpon such fits , our memory , and our vnderstanding failes vs , onely our will is then occupied . She had no sooner made her market , and ●…ript me of a matter of some hundred Royals , but she said vnto me ; enough ( good Sir ) I beseech you no more , for Gods sake , leaue off while it is well , and doe that ( as you loue me ) which I shall aduise you vnto : Let me then intreat you Sir , that you will haue the patience to stay a while at the turning of this street , through which you saw vs now come , for the next house saue one , at the end of this street , is mine ; we goe but a little wayes off here , to fetch a peece of worke , that I haue put forth to doing , I shall make no stay , but come backe by and by , and be instantly with you . We will not tarry scarce the turning of your hand , and then you shall goe in with mee into my house ; for there lodges no body , but I , and my maid , and there you shall see I will bee at your seruice , as you shall be pleased to command me ; besides , you shall heare me sing , and play in that manner , that you neuer heard a sweeter voyce , nor saw a better or quicker hand vpon a Virginall . Get you thither ( my deare ) whither I haue directed you , that you may not be seene to haue come along with me ; for I am a married woman , of honorable parents , well reported of by my neighbours , and generally wel thought of , and I would not willingly lose this their good opinion ; yet you seeme vnto mee to bee a a gentleman of that quality and noblenesse , that I would willingly hazard both my person , my reputation , and whatsoeuer else is dearest vnto me , for your sake . I beleeu'd her in all that shee had said ; and did now thinke my selfe as cock-sure of her , as if I had had her already betweene mine armes . I did as she commanded mee , standing close vpright against the corner , where I continued from halfe houre past eight of the night , till the clocke had strooke eleuen , and euer now and then me thought I had a glimpse of them , and that I saw the bulkes of them a far of , making towards mee , but I might as well haue staid there till this day , for any comming againe of theirs . The deuil a Mistresse , or mayd of them , that I could see any more . When I saw that it was so late , and that they staid so long , I imagined with my selfe , that shee had some Gallant to her seruant , and that shee being gone to his house , he would not giue her leaue to returne . For the which I did blame her , but not much ; for my selfe would haue done the like by her , if shee had come once within my doores . I perswaded my selfe , that she could not helpe it ; and that it was not in her hands to do as she would : and said to my selfe ; Aun , seran buenas mangas , despues de Pascua : It is no great matter ; A payre of o o Buenas son mangas , despues de pascua . The meaning whereof , is , when that which we desire , comes to vs somewhat later then we could haue wisht it . Covarr . verb. mangas . sleeues , will not doe amisse after Easter . What Prouerbe . is not to day , may be to morrow : and as good then as now . There are more dayes in the weeke then one ; as there are more fingers then one , on the hand . Thus goes the world ; one day followes on the p p Vn dia , viene tras otro . necke of another ; but it is the fashion of it , To be all for the present . I tooke notice of the doore against another time , and went walking along another way , as I was led along by my desires . Anon after , I returned thither againe , whither when I was come , all was very hush and quiet ; there was no memory nor signe of any one body in all that street , nor at any doore or window , any noyse to be heard , nor any nose , no not so much as of a dogge , or of a cat , that peeped out . I stood prying and watching from one side to the other ; I fetcht many turnes , I cought , hauk't , Prouerbe . and spit ; I made a noyse with my feet , but all in vaine , and to no purpose in the world . In the end , hauing staid there a great while , and being now growne weary with walking , as well as with expectation , I was resolued to get mee home to mine Inne , as despairing of any good hopes for that night : Which as I was about to doe , I might espie from a little window , a countenance , which Guzman talkes with a wench from a window . by its interpreter , the tongue , seemed to be a womans , who had thrust out her head at a little window , whose face I could not see , or if I had , I could not giue you an account thereof , for that it was so darke . I beganne to talke youthfully to her , ( or rather foolishly , for such kinde of parlees are but fooleries , ) but she told me that she was none of those I lookt after , marry she had a mayde , that I might happely make loue vnto , that was a drudge of the kitchen , and scoured her pots and her pannes . But be she , as she may be ; what euer she were , she spake so well , and intertained mee so for the time , that I quite forgot my selfe for the space of two houres that we interchanged talke , all that long while seeming vnto me but one short minute . But loe , ( if it offend not thine eares , ) whilst we were thus pratling , comes out a deuillish curre , one of Belzebubs whelpes , which as it should seeme , flew eagerly forth of one of the neighbours houses thereabouts , & fell a barking and balling so loud , that it was not possible for vs to heare or vnderstand one another : The window was high , the woman spake very low , there was a pretty fresh wind abroad , and the dog did so lay on , and spend his mouth so fast , that being willing to remedy that fault , I groaped with my feet for a stone , that I might throw it at him , and not finding any , I cast downe mine eyes to the ground , and I might perceiue neere vnto the wall , a little copped blacke thing , which I tooke to bee a stone . Presently I catcht it vp in my hand , but it was not a stone , nor nothing so hard ; but had How Guzman was besmear'd . quickly found that I had be-smeared my fingers ; I sought hastily to shake it off , and giuing a flirt with my hand to fling it away from mee , I gaue my fingers ends such a smart ierke against the wall , that I was much pained therewith ; and to case the tingling that I had in my nayles , I clapt my fingers to my mouth ere I was aware : but I forthwith repented me of what I had done . My often spitting would not mend the matter , and therefore I sought for helpe with my other hand from my pocket , thinking to take thence my handkercher ; but there was no such thing to be found . This strucke me into my dumpes , and made me melancholly , to thinke how the scuruy harlotry had cony catcht me . And I was so angry besides , to see how my mouth , and my hands were inammeled , that with very choller , my eyes were ready to start out of my head ; my guts were likewise in a good forwardnes to haue leapt out of my mouth , being vpon the point to vomit out of my stomacke all that I had within me , as those women vse to do , that haue a fit of the Mother . And the more to anger me , this scuruy curre did so persecute me with his bawling , that my Gentle-woman was forced to with-draw her-selfe , and to shut to her window , and I driuen to looke out some thing , to rid me of this odious and filthy stinke . I rubb'd my teeth against the wall , as well as I could , thinking that way to doe my selfe good . Well , when I saw it would be no better , I returned in a great rage to my Inne , with purpose to returne the next night to the same place , to see if I could by chance meet with that good wench , that had sold me this Greyhound .

CHAP. II.

Guzman de Alfarache goes from Sarago●…a , and comes to Madrid ; where he turnes Merchant , and is married . He breakes his credit , and turnes bankrupt . He treats of womens subtill trickes . And of the inconuenience of counter-writings ; and of their remedy .

AS soone as I came home , I got me to the well , and feigning that I would refresh my selfe there a while , ( because I would not haue my seruant acquainted with this disgracefull accident ) I wil●…'d him to draw me vp two buckets of water . Which when hee had done ; with the one , I washt my hands , and with the other my mouth , hauing almost rubbed off the skinne from either , and yet did not rest contented and fully satisfied of my selfe , I had taken such a villanous conceit of this filthy odour , or rather ordure . I could not fall asleepe for my life , nor settle my selfe to rest all that night , for thinking on that truth which the wench had told me , that I should neuer while I liu'd meete with a quicker or a nimbler hand . See now whether she ly'd or no ? I am sure I shall neuer forget her words , so good cause haue I to remember them , for that which fell out afterwards . The Gracian Helen ( I assure you ) nor the Romane Lucretia , cannot be more , or 〈◊〉 remembred by others , then shee by me . And yet , when I was thinking on her , the others conuersation would seeke to put that out of my head , one seeking to thrust out the other , so that I was as it were distracted betweene them both . I would haue had them ( like nayles ) to haue driuen out one another , that I might haue heard no more newes of them . And when I began to shut the doore of my remembrance to these , this same scuruy copped pibble stone came flying in at a by-window , the very conceit whereof , began a-fresh to turne my stomacke . What a bad night must we needs make of this , hauing to doe with so many ? For if q q Duero . Rio famosissimo en Espanna . Por el qual se dixo . yo soy Duero , que todas las aguas beuo . Covarr . v●…rb . Duero . Duero , did compasse me in on the one side ; Pen̄atajada , did girt me in on the other . But when my hat was come to its colour , & that I had considered a little better on the businesse , I said with my selfe ; If this poore tricke ( not for any great hurt that it did doe me , but only for that it was a tricke put vpon me ) I can thus hardly digest , and that it makes my stomacke to rise , as oft as I thinke vpon it ; how will my kinde kindred in Genoa , digest those gudgeons , that they swallowed ? how brooke that famous iest , which sticks so close to their ribs ? If such a r r Quando aqueste assi duele , que hara con guindas ? toy as this , a meere trifle , not worth the talking of , moue Prouerbe . my patience so much , how would it haue wrought vpon me , had it beene a matter of moment ? Thus did I passe away the night , thinking one while on 〈◊〉 , another on that ; what I should do with my selfe the next day , how bestow my time , what cloathes I should weare ? or whether I were best to put on my great chaine , which I kept in store for high Holy-dayes , and great Feasts ? ●…hat part of the Towne I should quarter out ? what words I should speake , to moue her affection ? or what present I should send her , to oblige her vnto me ? Then throwing all these things out of my minde , as if they had neuer beene in my thought , I should runne by and by backe againe ( like a giddy-headed Spaniel ) beating and questing vpon the old haunt , saying to my selfe : If it should be my good hap , to meet with this young crafty harlotry to morrow , what shall I doe vnto her ? Shall I lay hands on her ? No : Shall I take that from her , which shee filcht out of my pocket ? Neither : What shall I do then ? Shall I craue her better acquaintance , and desire her friendship ? Least of all . Embracing therefore none of these , I aduised with my selfe , and said ; Why should I trouble my selfe to seeke after her ? To what end ? I know the goodnes of her hand already , and how quicke & nimble her fingers be , be it for Virginall , Harpe , or any thing else that you will put them to . Let her go ; God be her good speed ; and much good may it doe her with them , s s Alla se lo aya Marta con sus pollo●… . Los pollos de Marta , piden pan , y dan les agua Marta la piadosa , &c. Covarr . pag. 541. Allase lo aya Marta consus pollos : I could wish they Prouerbe . had beene more for her sake . Well may shee thriue with them . For if shee had not stood in need of them , and beene in want , I assure my selfe , shee would neuer haue put her-selfe to so much danger . I began to looke a litle better into my selfe , and when I had well considered what I was , and knew mine owne condition , and the courses that I had run , I whispered my selfe in the eare , and said ; What complaints will not the butcherly Wolfe frame against the poore silly Lambe , accusing him of troubling the water when he ca●…e to drinke , that he might pick a hole in his coat ? A lusty strong M●…le can hardly carry the gold , the siluer , the pearle , the pretious stones , and the iewels , which I had parloynd , and come cleare away with them out of Italy , and yet sticke not to finde fault with this poore soule , for a thing of nothing , that shee tooke from me , being perhaps vrged thereunto out of meere necessitie . O the miserable condition of men ! how apt , and how easie are we to complain●… ? O how much a doe , doe we make about a little ! How take on , as though we were vndone ! What a little losse , and what a deale of lamentation ? O the immense and infinite goodnes of God ! How much do we offend thy diuine Maiestie ? How little reckoning do we make of it ? and yet how easily dost thou forgiue vs our offences ? What vassalage , and base subsection is that , which men doe y●…eld to their owne passions ? And because the best of things , is the curbing of them , and to make vse of them in their time and place ; I know very well , and am able from thence to reade this lecture both to my selfe and others ; That we ought to haue as much compassion of those that offend , as we haue cause to enuie those that forgiue . For mine owne part , I will follow this lesson : Let her make herselfe merry therefore with the money shee got from me ; for I forgiue her with all my heart .

Now whilest I was thus discoursing with my selfe , the day began to breake . The light , by little and little , had crept in through some chinkes of the windowes , when together with it , a little sleepe likewise came creeping vpon my selfe , being willing to haue my senses clogg'd with those soft-lined fetters , in which I lay fast till nine of the clocke , and slept so soundly , that I could not say ; This mouth is mine . Nor was I so glad that I had slept so well , as that I found my selfe thereby the better disposed to watch the night following , without being bound to pay that debt to nature , when my game was at the fairest , if fortune should chance to fauour me so much , as to offer me a faire occasion , to finish what I had begun . I rose vp well satisfied , wishing the houre were come , wherein I might goe to that desired place . I made me ready , and went to Masse , and visited the Image of our Lady of * * Pilar de Saragoça , One of the famousest Charches in the world , for that our blessed Lady appeared there to the Apostle S. Iames , and willed him to build a Church there to her honour . Padre Pin●…da lib. 10. Monar . Eccles. cap. 25. sect 4. Pilar , which is one of the greatest deuotions , that is in Christendome . I spent that day in walking vp and downe ; I saw my Widow , who came to the window , to wash her hands . I could haue wisht , that those drops of water , which fell from her snowie fingers , would haue trickled downe vpon my heart , to see if they would haue beene able to quench the fire , that flamed in my breast . I had not the face to speake a word to her : No not so much as , God saue you .

I stood leaning against the corner of a wall , putting my selfe in a good handsome posture , looking on her with a wanton eye , a cheerefull looke , and a smiling countenance . And shee likewise smilde , and talking with her seruants , who attended there on her , after shee had washt , they carryed away the towell , the bason , and the ewer , which when they had set them aside , they put their heads out at the window , and lookt vpon me . I hauing receiued this fauour , thought I had now brought my businesse to an end . I stretcht out my legs , and my brest , The Spanish posture , when they court their Mistresse . and lifting vp my head , and bearing vp my necke somewhat stiffe , I made two or three short turnes , throwing one corner of my cloake ouer my shoulder , setting my hat on t 'one side , laying my left hand on my sword , and resting the right on my side , treading my steps in state , and turning my rolling eyes vpon her , I walk't ley surely before her window , my eye being neuer off on her . Whereat they laugh't a good ; and I rested well contented . They made themselues merry , and I was very well pleased . I assumed so much libertie to my selfe , and behaued my selfe so boldly , as if I had already obtained what I desired ; and as though the doores and windowes of the house had of purpose been set open for me to enter in . And all the while I was vsing this Courtship , and performing this my Loue-exercise , she stood me still , and did not once offer to wagge from the window .

Many Gentlemen past that way , well clad , young , able , and handsome : yet in my iudgement , none of them like to me , neyther in apparell nor person . In euery one of them I could haue found one fault or other ; but in me , there was nothing to be excepted against . One came short in the handsome shape and feature of his foot ; another wanted a well made legge , the calfe was too little , or the small too big ; some were too tall , and other-some too lowe ; some too fat , and others too leane : This , went a little limping ; that , awry . All had one blemish or other ; I only , was compleat ; I was I perse I ; I was like a Rule , without exception . All in me , was in true Mood and Figure ; In a full and perfect symmetry , hauing a iust and euen proportion of euery particular part , in respect of the whole frame . And being of best both grace and fauor in my person , I was graced and fauoured more by her , then all the rest : for shee did not shew them the like countenance , as she did mee .

Night drew on , she left the window , but before she with-drew herselfe , she turned her eyes towards me , and so went in . I hyed me home to my lodging , being rich in hopes , and musing vpon that which in this case was fittest to be done : Mine Hoste came to me to keepe me company ; but because I tooke no content in any thing but my contemplations , I intreated him to hold me excused , for that I had businesse to goe abroad . I supt , and taking my sword with me , I went out of doores in pursuit of my businesse : you shall see how euill is Prouerbe . mans inclination : For notwithstanding that I had made , ( as you haue heard ) that discourse with my selfe , in fauour of that woman , which had cozened mee of a few Royals , and had put on a resolution to let it passe , and neuer to thinke more of it ; yet my thoughts were much troubled therewith , and like so many Bryez or horse-flyes , did make me kick and stampe against my former determination , and would not let me be in quiet , but that I must needs goe and seeke her out . Whereupon , I gaue that night a hundred turnes about the very selfe same street , hauing a conceit with my selfe , that it would be my good hap to light once more luckily vpon her in the same manner as before . But not knowing well why , for what cause , or to what end I did it , but walked idly there vp and downe , till the houre was come . I had waited long , and when I saw to what little purpose , I thought to make homewards towards my lodging : and as I entred into the Cosso , by a crosse-way , right ouer-against my Mistresses house , I might discerne a pretty wayes off , two seuerall companies , one on t 'one side of the street , and t'other on the other . Thereupon , I returned a little backe , and stepping into a porch , I beganne to thinke with my selfe ; I am a stranger , this Gentle-woman of good ranke and quality , well descended , and rich withall . There is generall notice taken of her worth and meanes . This flesh u u Esta●…e la carne en el 〈◊〉 por talta de gato . Alluding to those women that are retyr'd , and chaste ; not so much out of their owne will , a ●…or want of opportunity , and a naturall re●…ct , and shamefast feare , that the would m●…y not take notice of their incontinency . Casta est quam nemo rogauit . Ovid. leg . 〈◊〉 . And anon after . Aut si rusticitas non vetat , ipsa rogat . Also we say ; Que alguna 〈◊〉 garabato ; when with her beauty , and other good graces , she draws as it were with hookes , your gallants hearts after her . Coverr . verb. Garabato . need not to haue beene hung vp vpon the hookes for want of a Cat. No man will say that this was not a woman worth the looking after , but rather that there was a great deale of reason , that she should be wooed & sued vnto , and to be serued and obserued by those that had the happinesse to see her . These ( said I to my selfe ) doe not wait here to giue or receiue an almes : I know not who they are , nor what they pretend ; whether they be friends & all of one companie , or whether any one of them be interessed here ; if by misfortune I should come amongst them , and that they should hedge me in in the midst of them , and make a ring about me , the would not onely muffle me with their cloakes , but make me as full of holes as a Sieue , a●… pricke mee in the body with their Rapiers points , as Bulls are stucke with darts , when they are bayted in the market-place , and perchance leaue me for dead . This Country is dangerous , the men bold and insolent ; their weapons of aduantage , they many , and I a poore single man . And therefore ( Guzman ) x x The Spanish phrase is , Guarte , no sea nabo . looke to thy selfe . And if they be enemies , and haue a mind Prouerbe to goe together by the eares , it is not I that can part them , I shall neuer be able to make them friends , but indanger my selfe , and doe no good . Goe the world which way it will , fall backe , or fall edge , the best course for me , is to get mee home to my lodging , I am sure that is the safest way . And fitter it were for me to goe to mine Inne , and looke to my trunkes , and to get me out of Towne as soone as I can . For I neither know any , nor am knowne by any . Besides à quien se muda , y y A quien , se muda , dios le ayuda . dios le ayuda . God helpes those that alter their euill condition . I Prouerbe . betooke me to my heeles , and came in a trice to my lodging . Assoone I came in , I presently got me to bed , where I rested , with much more sleepe , and a great deale lesse paine , then the night before . For indeed , there is not any thing that doth sooner thrust these loue toyes out of our heads , then to see such kind of visions . Whereupon I resolued the next day to leaue the Citie , and so I did ; Alcala , an Vniuersity not aboue a dayes iourney from Madrid . By little and little I drew towards Madrid ; And when I come to Alcala d●… Henares , I abode there eight daies , for that it seemed vnto me , one of the finest and pleasantest places of any other that I had seene , since my comming out of Italy : and if the loue of the Court , had not clapt wings to my feet , I am verily perswaded , that I should haue continued there still , that I might haue inioyed that fresh and delicate Riuer , their plentifull prouision , their rare and singular wits , and many other good intertainments . But because Madrid was patria Prouerbe . communis , the common mother to vs all , and a large field , wherein euery man ᶻ Dexar vn mar , por el arroya . might range at pleasure , I thought it no discretion , to forgoe the Sea , for a Riuer . And for lesser things , to neglect the greater . In fine , euery man may there follow that which hee hath most mind to . There no man knowes one another ; no not so much as those that liue within the same doores , and lodge in the same house . This drew me thither , and thither I came . The face of the Court , as also of the towne , was quite changed , since I left it . There was no Grocer there to be heard of , no memory now , that there was euer any such Madrid much altered in a few yeares . man . I found the fields peopled with houses , children become men , young folkes growne ancient , the ancient old , and the old dead . The high wayes turned into streets , and the streets altered in their bredth and building ; finding euery thing in good order , and farre better then when I left it . I lighted on a lodging , that liked me exceeding well ; and so well , that I staid full eight Guzman takes a lodging in an Inne . dayes within doores , without putting so much as my foot ouer the threshold , being onely tide thus fast by the legge , by the good company and sweet conuersation of mine Hostesse . Who , besides her handsomnesse , had a good fashion of behauiour , and a pleasing kind of entertainment . She was discreet in her cariage , and at boord knew very well how to demeane her selfe . Those few dayes that I staid there , shee made me very good cheere , and did with all possible punctuality , seeke to please and obserue mee , fitting my humour to a hayre .

While I continued there , I went casting vp of my accompts , plotting and deuising with my selfe , what course of life I should runne , how , and vpon what I should liue , and in conclusion Vanity weighed downe the scales . And first He turnes Gallant . of all I beganne my businesse with gallantry and brauery ; being euery day more fine then other . I made me two different sutes of cloathes , with long silke stockings , of the best Naple silke , neate ones they were , and strongly sow'd to my payn'd hose : And I tooke another sute out of my trunke for change ; thinking with my selfe , that being thus well clad , and getting me a good horse , and taking two seruants to attend me , by shewing my selfe abroad in this good equipage , I might the easier vent my merchandize , and meete with those , that would buy these my iewels of mee . I put this in execution , and beganne to braue it , and to spend liberally . My Hostesse was not short , either handed , or Prouerbe . witted , but a gentle courteous dame : she sought in all things to please my a a The Spanish phrase is , Dauame cannas a las manos . palate . She had found out the beating of my pulse , and need not to be taught how to apply her selfe to my malady . It hapned , that amongst many of those her she-friends that did often come and visite me , one of them brought along with her in her company a yong wench , well fauored , well behau'd , hauing a face like an Angel ; and though she were in extreame both faire & beautifull , yet was she far more wily and subtile ; it was a notable crafty carrion . To this wench , did I make loue ; she shewes her selfe coy and disdainfull ; gifts b b Dadiuas , ablandon pen̄as . molifie rockes , and Prouerbe . breake the hardest stones in sunder . The more I did regalar her , and the more courtesies I bestowed vpon her , the more kind she grew ; of a Haggard , she became a gentle Hawke ; and though somewhat wilde and strange at first , yet now was shee taught to come to fist ; I could play with her beake , cast her , Guzman makes loue to a young wench . and giue her stones , so that now she was manag'd , as I would haue her . I continued this friendship with her for some few dayes , in all which time , ( as if she had beene some gutter to receiue all the raine that fals ; or some Chimist , or Alchimist , to melt a mans money , and to extract quintessences ) there was not that day that past ouer her head , wherein she did not begge or craue something of me ; peeling , and polling me , as much , as possibly she could ; carrying her selfe therein so ●…ily , & so cunningly , as if she had bin a woman of much riper year 's , and well beaten to these kind of businesses ; neuer a Courtizan of them all , could go beyond her . But she was the better Verste ( I doubt not ) in these things , in that she had so good a tutor of her Mother . Once ( amongst the rest ) I remember she intreated me , that I would buy her a gowne of crimson damaske , which a Broaker had to sell at the Puerta c c A place so called , in the high street of Madrid neare vnto ●…an Felipe . del sol , trimmed with gold lace , and richly embroidered , the price no lesse then 1000 Royals . This seeming in her an excessiue kind of liberty , that she had assumed to herselfe , to dispose of my moneys at her pleasure , ( for albeit , I was not a little taken with her loue , and though I saw her crauing nature , yet I had not dealt so ill with her , but that I had bestowed on her aboue 100. Crowns one way or other , and that if I should suffer her still to d d The Spanish phrase is , No quedarà bolo en hiesto . vntap my vessell , she would sackme so dry at last , that she would not leaue one drop in al the hogshead ) I would not giue it her , but grew somewhat angry with her ; she sets light by it , was offended with my denyal , took it to hart , & thought hardly of me , and that I had vs'd her vnkindly . I would take no notice of it . The Vnkindnesse growes betwixt Guzman and his wench . A plot to cozen Guzman . mother & the daughter , were both displeased with me . I said nothing , but lookt on , to see , what would become of this businesse . They came not at me , nor did I send to them . They entred into counsell with mine Hostesse . The Wolfe & the Foxe , had both laid their heads together , how they might intrap the poore harmelesse Sheepe ; and all three did combine them-selues against me . Now here see their roguery , and what a villanous plot they had laid for me . When I was set downe to my meat , when I was iust in the midst of my dinner , not dreaming of any ill , that was intended towards mee , I might perceiue an Alguazil Prouerbe . de Corte , make towards my lodging . Who , when hee came within hearing , speakes out aloud , Body of me ; Aqui morira Sanson , y qua●…tos , con el son ; Here shall e e Aqui morira Sanson , y quantos con el son ; A kind of Rodomontado , or proud menacing . An Algu●…il comes to arrest Guzman . Samson die the death , and as many as be here with him . My end ( said I to my selfe ) is now at hand . I thrust the table from mee , and rose vp much troubled . Then said the Alguazil vnto me ; Pacifie your selfe Sir , and rest you quiet , we come not to apprehend you for a thiefe . It cannot bee for any other thing ( thought I with my selfe ; ) for he had nam'd the word thiefe before , and I did verily beleeue that he spake in a frumping and scoffing kind of manner ; and that for this cause he was come thither to arrest me . That word Guzman much dismaid . strucke my heart so dead , that I was not able to speake a ready word , much lesse to saue my selfe by flight , but stood as still as a stocke . The Catch-poles had made good the doore , the window was of the least , & too high from the street , from whence I could not get downe so easily , but that they would take hold on me , ere I came to the ground ; or if I escapt their hands , it was a thousand pound to a penny , I should breake my necke in the fall . At the last , for all my spirits were thus troubled within me , I did ( as well as I could ) aske him , what was his will with me ? He ( hauing much adoe to forbeare laughing , and hauing no share of the care that I was in ) putting his hand into his bosome , pul'd out a Warrant , by vertue whereof the Alcaldes had commanded him to apprehend me vpon the breach of that law of theirs , de f f The Spanish phrase is , Por el virgo de justilla . viciatione virginum , of cracking of maiden-heads , and the deflowring of a virgin . The deuill take thee for a wicked woman as thou art , and me for an arrant villaine , ( said I ) if I know what thou wouldst haue , or what thou dost meane by this : And let mee neuer liue , if she doe not lie like a hundred thousand diuels . I sware vnto him , that it was a most sinfull and abhominable vntruth , and a testimony as full of falshood , as God is true . The Alguazil smiling vpon me , said , I beleeue you Sir , but told me withall , that he might not exceed his Commission , nor was it in his power to release me . And therefore wisht me to put on my cloake , and to goe along with him to prison . Now I was in the bryers ; I knew not how to winde my selfe out of them ; my finall ruine was before my face ; I had trunkes ; what ones they were , you your selues can imagine ; my seruants not knowne , I lay in a lodging where they had made a g g It is an vsual phrase 〈◊〉 Spaine to say ; Esta hecha su cama . Such a mans bed is a making ; when there is some matter a working against him for his hurt . bed for me , or rather a trap to catch me . I did feare this was but the Prologue to the Tragedy , that would come after , making this but a colour for the better cozening me of all that I had . If I left my trunkes there , they would haue beene as safe in the street ; and if I should remoue them thence , I knew not whither to carry them ; And to goe to prison is like vnto those , who goe to play in a Tauerne , that is seated on the top of some cold mountain ; who begin in Cards , & end in drunkennes , falling asleepe with the pot between their hands . Thinking with my selfe , that though I went thither for a trifle , I could not tell , whether these mole hils would bee made mountaines ; and small occasions breed mighty inconueniences . So that I was at a stand with my selfe , and knew not which way to take . I tooke the Alguazil Guzman treats in priuate with the Alguazil . aside , and intreated him , as he did honor one onely God , that he would not be the instrument of my vndoing . I told him , that wealth that I had , was like to run great hazard of being vtterly lost , and that he would be pleased to deuise some meanes , that they might not doe me so great a wrong ; for that I assured my selfe they had a purpose to rob me , and they were minded to make a spoyle and a prey of me , and that this was onely their intent , and nothing else .

He was an honest man ( which was no small good fortune , considering his calling ) discreet , and courteous , he knew my innocency , as one that was well acquainted with the contrary parties course of life ; and I promised to bee so thankfull vnto him for this his kindnesse , that he should haue no cause to complaine , or repent him of the fauour he should afford me in this case . Hee told me , that I should not need to trouble my selfe any farther in the businesse , for I should find him ready to serue me in all that he was able . He left his seruants The Alguazil wrought to fauour Guzman . there to looke vnto me , and went to seeke out the aduerse party , that brought him thither , who was in my Hostesses chamber . He went to and fro betweene vs , with offer of such and such conditions , to accommodate the businesse ; and in the end , he threatned them , that if they would not come to agreement , and make some reasonable end , he would sweare the truth in my fauour , and discouer their cheatings , and their rogueries , if they would not rest contended with that which was fitting .

They , when they saw how ill their cause was like to goe with them , were Guzman compounds his businesse . willing in the end to put it wholly into his hands , and so this quarrell was ended between vs , for two thousand Royals . For he hauing put the mother to her oath , she swore , that I had promised to pay for the gowne , and double the value of it in money , and that if this would not content her , she should haue more . But she I know rested well contented , and was glad with all her heart , that she went thus away with these two thousand Royals , because she knew they were not due vnto her . Well , I paid downe the money on the nayle , and wee went to the Registers office , and there had the bill dasht : So that the sute was now at an end . It cost me in the whole , a matter of two hundred Ducats ; & within halfe an houre after all was dispatcht , it was darke night . But I would not stay a minute Guzman leaues his lodging . longer in that lodging , nor would not so much as haue set my foot within the doores of that wicked house , had it not beene to haue away my trunkes , and such other things as I had there . Which done , I presently parted thence , and went to seeke out another . I was not curious , but tooke the first that came to hand , till I could fit my selfe better , and meet with some quarter part of a handsome and honest house , with persons in it of some worth and credit . I bought me some moueables and such houshold-st●…ffe , as was necessary for my selfe , and my seruants , and prouided me pots and pans for the kitchen . Whilest I was making this prouision , it was my hap one morning to meet with the same Alguazil in the h h A monastery in Madrid . The discourse that p●…st betwixt Guzman and the Alguazil at the Descalças . Descalças , and after wee had both heard Masse , at the said Monastery , we talkt together , and I sware vnto him by the blessed Sacrament , that was there vpon the Altar , that I had neuer made any such promise to that woman ; he told me , Sir , not onely in those things which I know , but in those , which I know not , you might haue spared this oath with mee , much lesse was there need of it in a thing of this nature ; for this is well knowne , to be a packt peece of knauery , and a plot laid of purpose to picke your purse . I know this young baggage ; who besides this , which she hath now put vpon you , hath exhibited two other seuerall bils in the Court in this kind . The first , before the Vicar of this towne , against a poore i i The Spanish word is Cauallero de epistola , because it is the subdeacons office to sing , or reade the Epistle of the Masse . Covarr . 358. Subdeacon , who came hither about a certaine businesse ; he was the sonne of honest and rich parents , who for quietnesse sake , was content ( good man ) to haue his cloathes torne from his backe by them , and being stript of all that he had , went away ( as they say ) in his shirt , they leauing him as poore as Iob. Afterwards they commenced the like sute here in this towne , making a grieuous complaint against a Teniente , who was a Catalunian , and exceeding rich : They firkt him too , and fleeced him as well as they could ; but this man hath deeply sworne , that hee will bee fully reuenged on her . And now hath she complained on your selfe to the Alcaldes ; And had it not beene , that I held it the lesser inconuenience to pay them that money , then to yeeld your selfe a prisoner , leauing your goods ( as they say ) at sixe and seauen , I assure you I would not haue giuen way vnto it , but haue executed my office . But of two euils , the least is to bee chosen . For albeit you would out of doubt haue beene freed in the end , yet would you not The incenueniences of imprisonment and Law-sutes . haue procur'd your liberty in haste ; for much time must first haue beene spent in the proofes , and then in the replies to those proofes ; whereas this way , though you were at an vniust charge , yet haue you by this meanes , auoided the prison , your shackles , your Visits , your Atturneys , your Proctors , & your Registers , bringing in this relation , and returning that relation , this information , and that information , al which is but vexation of spirit , & prolongation of time , trouble , charge , and discontent . The bargaine was driuen cheaper this way , and with a great deale lesse distaste . I vow this vnto you , as I am a Gentleman , and an honest man , that in all the time that I haue serued his Maiesty with this Uare in my hand , which is now going vpon the three and twentieth yeare , that of all the cases that I haue seene in this kind , I haue not knowne aboue three in three hundred , that haue beene iustly prosecuted in Court : For he that feeds vpon that dish , ( vnlesse hee haue very ill lucke ) seldome or neuer payes for it . But when such things come in question , the accuser hath commonly the better of the accused ; the plaintiffe will bee sure to fare well , how ere it goe with the defendant ; he hath that he lookes for , he cares for no more ; for it is in this , as at Best k k The Spanish phrase is , Echar la buena barba , A s●…ort whereat one ●…ayes for all the 〈◊〉 that he and his fellowes eate , by asking the seller this question , Who is the honestest man of all vs ? which is signified , por la barba . By allusion , it is spoken of those , who with set●…p eches , and flattering phrases gull a man of his money . The fashion of your Spanish qucanes . be trusted , amongst Costermongers , the first speaker scapes scot-free . And these kinde of people will neuer giue ouer this tricke , till they haue lighted vpon one vnluckie bird or other , whom they may rob both of his credit , and his money , or get them such a husband as may supply their wants , and necessities . It is like vnto some botch or kernell , which first begins in the finger , but afterwards break s●…out in the arme-pit : And the cause of it is , because the delinquent either sodainly flies vpon the accusation , or is so poore a fellow , that he is not worth the looking after .

These young queanes , either walke the streets , to see if they can meet with a good chapman , or drop into some friends house , or keepe at home at their fathers or their mothers house : this , or that other young man , enters within doores , comes into the kitchen , where hee hath opportunity to speake vnto her , and she to answer him : They are all alone , the doores shut , time enough , will they want not , occasion is offered , and the bargaine driuen . But this is practised for the most part amongst the poorer sort ; and the party hath no sooner the sent of those rashers of Bacon , that are m●…king ready for him , but hee presently gets him out of the house , and comes there no more . Now , when their parents come to know it , that they may not lose the fruit of their labours , they giue her an admonition , or gentle reprehension . And afterwards they them-selues stand sentinell , and haue a nearer eye to the businesse , and so order the matter for her , that shee may fall into such a mans hands , of whom they may Pr●…rbe . make profit of this their merchandize . Whence , it oftentimes comes to passe , that he that is least in fault , l l The Spanish phrase is : Quien menos culpa ti●…ne , à lavar la lana . And it is spoken by way of pr●…erbe ; V●…s lavarey●…s la lana . de aquel , qu●… le ●…a caydo la suerte mas trabajosa Comolos , que trabaja●… en l●…s lavaderos ; que v●…os son apartadores . Otros ti●…nen l●…s mas oficios , que no son pocos : y los que lavan la lan●… tienen mayor trabajo , por andar en el agua todo el dia , desnudos . Covarr . 113. A tale of a can●…g que●…ne . smarts most . Then said I vnto him , I pray Sir tell me , if these things neuer happen , but in secret , and vnseene , none knowing thereof but them-selues , who dare to sweare , or can truly take his oath , vnlesse shee shreeke and cry out , whereby it may appeare , that he did offer her force and violence , or that the people came in and found them busseling together , or in the act it selfe ? He told me , such an oath is not necessarie , nor in such cases doe they put the witnesse to proue , that he saw them together in that actuall manner , for this were an impossibilitie , the businesse being carryed in that secrecy , as you propound it . It will serue turne , that he , or they , depose , that they were seene to talke together , or to haue beene in priuate together , or that hee was seene to kisse her , or to embrace her in his armes , or that he was in some chamber with her , the doore shut vpon them , or that they had seene some such passages , by which it might well be presumed , that such a thing was either done , or in doing . For what with these circumstances , and her owne asseueration , standing stifly vnto it , that he had rauisht her , and forced her against her will , it being found vpon inspection , by a Iurie of women , that her mayden-head is crackt , and that shee is no more a Virgin , this shall be a strong and sufficient proofe against him . I my selfe ( said the Alguazil ) saw in this Court , a very rigorous course taken in this kinde , and one of the strangest Cases , that I beleeue you haue scarce euer heard of the like heretofore .

There was once abiding in this Towne a very handsome and beautifull Gentle-woman , a stranger in this place , who came hither ( being baited out of her owne Country ) for no other end , then to seekè out some meanes to liue . Shee profest her-selfe to be a maid , and in that habit shee went a while vp and downe the Towne . A certaine Prince in this Court had a great minde vnto her ; he pretends , and procures her loue ; he giues her a ticket vnder his owne hand for to pay her eight hundred Ducats , in which writing , shee would haue it set downe , that there should be a respect had vnto her honour ; specifying therein , that he bestow'd the same vpon her by way of dowry for her aduancement in mariage . The Prince did not pay this money at the day , shee put his bond in sute , he answers not vnto it , shee gets out an execution against him , and recouers the money .

About some foure yeeres after ( being fauoured by a certaine great person ) shee prouided the like pickle for another , that was a stranger , who hauing had some dealings with her , shee picks a quarrell with him , and makes 〈◊〉 grieuous complaint against him . And howbeit the defendant alledged against her the originall writing , and the payment of the principall , together with the interest , yet they condemn'd him , and made him to giue her full satisfaction , so that the poore Gentle-man was forced to pay her soundly for her cut Melon , it was argued to and fro , that shee was , and was not a maid ; but not to dispute , whether shee were or no : Sure I am , that shee recouered twice or thrice in Court , that which shee neuer sold ; and in this manner did shee goe away with the bucklers . And therefore ( Sir ) you haue not beene ill serued in this businesse , but haue well woond your selfe out of the bryars . For in good faith ( Sir ) the witnesses did threaten you sore , were violently bent against you , and spake very bloody words ( though the wench was not so . ) And so we tooke leaue one of another , he going his way , and I mine . I did much wonder to heare such businesses to be so carryed . Insomuch , that discoursing thereof with my selfe , I began by degrees to fall into consideration of the sacred Councell of Trent , which so holily , so iustly , and so lawfully had made prouision for clandestin●… mariages ; and by which there was a remedie found out for so many inconueniences , stopping so many gaps , and rearing vp so many walls , to keepe them out , and hinder their entrance . And I did likewise weigh with my selfe , that if the secular power , would ( as in iustice they ought ) doe as much in these dayes in such cases , ( as mine was ) I verily perswade my selfe , that there would not be the fifth , nay not the tenth part of those lewd and naughty women , as are now ( the more is the pitie ) euery where abroad in the world , liuing to their owne , and others vndoing . For really , and truly , there is no such thing as this force , which they so much inforce ( that we may speake it vnder benedicite ) but that which they call force , is rather an accord and consent of both parties . Nor is it possible , that one man alone should force a woman , if shee of her owne will , or with a kinde of vnwilling willingnesse , graunt him not that which he desireth of her . And if she giue way , and rest contented with it , why doth shee question and trouble him for it ? And here I shall take occasion , to tell you a true Storie , which hapned in a certaine place within the Signorie , or Iurisdiction of Andaluzia .

There was a Country Clowne , a good honest day-labourer , that had a pretty A Tale of a Country Clowne . young wench to his daughter , with whom a young fellow fell in loue , that was a neighbours sonne of the same Parish ; and in fine , hauing obtained what he desired , when her father came to know of it , and that this young man had pluckt from her the fairest flower of her garland , he made haste to such a Towne ( that was the Head-Towne of that Diuision ) to make his complaint against this his neighbours sonne . The Alcalde hearkned with great attention to all that hee said , and after that the poore man had informed him at full of the case and had said all that he could , hee said vnto him : Well ( my honest friend ) you complaine here of this young man , that he hath tickled your daughter , & plaid the wanton with her , wherewith you find your selfe agrieu'd ; Is it not so ( my good friend ? ) yes ( and it please your Worship ) said her father , it is as your Worship sayes ; you say very true Sir . And I am much agrieu'd with it indeed , for that he did dishonour my daughter by force . Then the Alcalde , spake againe vnto him , and said ; Tell me ( I prithee ) how old is thy daughter , and how old is the young fellow ? My daughter ( said the father ) will be ( next August ) one and twenty yeare old , and the young man ( as I take it ) is some three and twenty . When the Alcalde heard him say so , in a rage he rose vp from the bench , and frowning vpon him , said angerly vnto him ; And comest thou with this to me now ? Haue I nothing else to doe ( thinkest thou ) but to heare euery idle foolish complaint ? He twen●…y three , & she twenty one : Let me heare no more of this ( my friend ) goe get you home , and rest you quiet ; here 's a pretty accusation with all my heart : one , one and twenty , and the other three and twenty , they might very well doe the businesse , they could not choose , but well and willingly goe to it . If others , in the like case , should receiue the like answer , and that there were a Law made , whereby it were enacted , That no woman , from eleuen yeares vpwards , dwelling in a Towne , should pretend her-selfe to be forced ; they would then be good perforce .

But vpon this subiect , may it please you to heare a singular accident , and a notable A digression to another storie of the like nature . case in this kinde , which hapned ( not long ago ) in one of the principallest Cities of that most noble Common-wealth of Venice .

There liued in that Citie , an old woman , base in her birth , and poore in her meanes , who had a daughter , that was very louely , faire , and beautifull . And because shee had not wherewithall to marry her , this crafty Gabri●…a ( being an old cunning Hagg ) deuised with her-selfe to make sale of the puritie and virginitie of her daughter , and that not once , but many and many times : and these her wicked proceedings did prosper well with her . For she would either be sure to haue that before hand , which they had agreed vpon , or by the fauour of some principall person , this , or that other man , was faine to compound with her , and to make his peace as well as he could . One day amongst the rest , this handsome young wench , being seene and well eyed by a young Gallant , and one of the principall Gentle-men of that Citie , a singl●…-man , and exceeding rich , vsed diuers meanes to winne her affection , and in the end obtained his purpose and after that he had enioyed her , he did very liberally requi●…e her for her kindnesse . But the greedy old woman ( who was couetousnesse it selfe ) thinking this Lordly gift too little , made her moane to a particular Gentleman , complayning how ill shee had beene dealt withall .

He , as it were in a iesting kinde of manner ( scorning and hating in his heart the vile and base humor of this wicked & accursed woman ) said thus vnto her ; Thou knowest Lena ( for that was her surname ) that the most illustrious , and most excellent Segnor Generale , will shortly be here ; and thou likewise knowest , what vpright iustice he doth indifferently administer to euery one , without respect of persons , and more particularly in such cases that concerne the good and honor of maydens . And therefore the best counsell that I can giue you , is , That you and your daughter Ricci●…lina get you both ( as soone as he comes hither ) vnto his Excellency , & plainly deliuer vnto him how Signor Co●…de N. hath forced and deflowred your daughter , and falling both a-weeping before him , yee further declare vnto him , that after he had had his will of her , he was not so good as his word with her , nor performed the promise which hee made vnto her ; which was , That he would eyther giue her two hundred crownes , or get her a good husband . And that therfore , seeing that he did not cumply with you neither in the one , nor the other , that his Excellency would therefore be pleased to take this your wretched and wofull case into consideration , and to doe you iustice . If you can doe this handsomely ( as I know you are not to seeke , and can doe it better then I can aduise you ) my life for yours , you will haue the day of him , and the businesse will go cleare on your side . It was not long after , that the Generall his Excellency came , before whose presence these women being brought , they opened this their false accusation . Vpon which relation of theirs , his Excellency was much moued , and caused the Conde to be sent for by one of his seruants : who , when hee came before him , was demanded , whether at any time he had had conuersation with Ricciolina the daughter of Lena ? He without any more adoe , ingeniously confest , that he had . When he heard him say so , he bestow'd vpon him , such a lo●…ing and fatherly rep●…ehension , that the Conde beganne to blush , and for very shame , could not for the present expresse himselfe , as he might , and would haue done in his owne excuse . Whereupon the Generall perceiuing this his tacite confession , caused Ricci●…lina to be called forth ( who by his appointment staid in the next roome ) and when shee was come , he grauely spake in this manner vnto him ; Signor Conde , if we should punish faults with rigour , a heauy punishment would light vpon you . But we , for that we loue your selfe , and all other offenders that come before vs , as our owne children , and taking pity and compassion of your youthfull feruor , and those violencies that accompany such yong yeares , we doe pardon you that grieuous and most hainous offence of forcing this maiden , as farre forth as it may touch your life ; but withall , wee condemne you , to pay the double of what you promised her , which comes to foure hundred crownes : which before you goe from hence , wee command that you presently disburse , and giue it to Ricci●…lina .

To this the C●…nde , his bloud now waxing warme , which before was frozen , with that respect and decency , which was fitting for him , replyed thus : Most Illustrious and Excellent Sir , I haue hitherto held my peace , it beseeming me so to doe , as one that is your most true , faithfull and obedient seruant , and most ready to submit my selfe to any reproofe or punishment , that you shall be pleased to inflict vpon me , in case this their accusation were true . And if your Excellency out of the greatnesse of your wisdome , shall be pleased to diue into the depth of these subt●…l womens hearts , and search them to the very bottome , your Excellenc●…e will soone discouer , how wickedly false these their accusations haue beene against me . And though I haue confessed , that I haue had conuersation with her , it was vpon couenant and agreement betweene vs , vpon such a price , which I punctually paid , giuing her more out of mine owne bounty , then she could challenge of me . Notwithstanding , if it shall seeme good vnto you , that I disburse this money , I craue no longer time , then that I may goe home & fetch it , wherewith I shall presently returne , and put the money into your Excellencies hands , to be disposed of , as you please ; but not as in punishment of any such error by me committed .

The Generall hauing heard what the Conde said , replyed vnto him , Signor Conde , goe fetch the money , for I shall stay here till you come . And you Ricciolina , see you depart not .

Now , whilest the Conde was going home , and returning backe againe , his Excellency went a farre off , asking this and that other question , one while of the old woman , another of the young , and so talking to and fro of diuers things , at last , he said vnto her ; Tell me ( Lena ) haue you euer carryed a good hand ouer your daughter ? haue you alwayes lookt narrowly vnto her ? Yes marry haue I Sir ( said she . ) And did you neuer ( replide he againe ) leaue her all alone by day or by night ? No Sir , quoth she . How comes it then to passe ( said his Excellency ) that you would suffer your daughter to be forced and deflowred by the Conde ? Why did not you defend her from that violence ? And you ( Ricciolina ) hauing your mother in your company , why would you let him force you , and take that from you which ( vnlesse you should in some sort consent thereunto ) it were impossible for him to get from you ? Both of them , then weeping , said vnto him ; That the Conde was too strong for them , and that they were not able to resist his violence , and therefore besought his Excellency , that hee would not suffer her daughter to be thus abused , and both of them to be left open to such a deale of scorne and reproach : but that he would be pleased to doe them iustice .

By this time the Conde was come , and had told out vpon a little table of Iuory foure hundred Crownes ; which by the Generall were giuen to Ricciolina , giuing her this Item withall , Take them ( daughter ) and looke well vnto them , lest they chance to be taken from thee . And you ( Lena ) haue a care both of her and her money . And so God be with you , I haue no more to say to you .

When they were gone , his Excellency turning himselfe towards the Conde , said vnto him , Goe , get you after them , and see you take their money from them , either by loue or force , by fayre meanes or by foule . And looke that you giue me a true account of the passage of this businesse .

The Conde hearing this , moued with rage and disdaine , seeing how basely he had beene vsed by these infamous women , ( not considering the condition imposed vpon him , nor to what end it was done ) made hastily after them ; nor did he goe alone by him-selfe , but made choyse of a seruant of his ( amongst those many that he had ) whom he tooke along with him . And so walking a good round pace , he ouertooke them a little on this side their owne house , and comming vnto them , after that he had saluted them very kindly , and by little and little had insinuated himselfe into them , hee continued discoursing with them , till he had brought them home . Where , as soooe as he was come into the house , he beganne to demand his money of them . And when he saw he could not preuaile with entreaties , he assayed to get it by force , and went roundly to worke with them . But Ricciolina , who had put the purse in her bosome , stoutly defended both it and her selfe , scratching the Conde with her hands , and biting him with her teeth ; who with all the strength that he had , could not come so much as to touch , much lesse to take the purse from her . To make good this quarrell , the mother ran in , and tooke part with her daughter , and they did so help and ayd one another , with their nailes and their teeth , and by their loud out-cryes and shreekes , that although the house were a lone-house , farre from neighbors , and little frequented , yet notwithstanding many people vpon this great noyse and tumult , came running thither , and amongst the common route , one Gentleman , who pressing in , and seeing the Conde all bloody , who fought like a fierce Lyon , set vpon by two rather inraged Beares , then women , what with his words , and what with his deeds , being assisted by others , he parted the one from the other . The Conde was so ouercome with choller , that hee laid about him like a mad man , and had so lost all patience , that doubtlesse hee had done much mischiefe , if he had not beene restrained by the company . He washt his face and his hands , and hauing wiped them with his handkerc●…er , he departed thence in company of that Gentleman , threatning those women , that he would be ●…euenged on them : who , no lesse offended then the furious Conde , made no long tarrying , but hasted with all the speed they could to the Generall . But the Conde had got the start of them , and was there before them , hauing fully acquainted his Excellency with all that had passed , shewing the scratches and the bitings which he had receiued from them : who had no sooner told his tale , but in come the women , vnsheathing their malicious & sharp-edged tongues , grieuously complaining of the Conde , who was there present , declaring , how first with fayre and kinde words , and afterwards by violent and forcible deeds , hee would haue taken their money from them , threatning besides to kill them .

Then said the Generall vnto them ; He hath not taken them from you , hath he ? No ( and it like you Excellency ) said they . How came it then to passe ( quoth he ) that he tooke them not from you ? They answered , Sir , we did so well bestir our selues , with our hands , our nailes , our teeth , and the shreekes that we made , to call in company , that he mist of his purpose and could not doe it .

Very good ( said the Generall ) and you Ricciolina , if your mother had not come in to help you , could you ( thinke you ) haue made a shift so to withstand the Condes courage , that he should not haue taken the purse from forth your bosome ? Yes indeed Sir , said she : for I feare him not , nor any thing he can doe , I care not a straw for him , for I thinke my selfe euery way as strong as he ; yet is it not meet , that men should come in this violent manner into poore womens houses , to take that from them which is none of theirs . Then ( said the Generall ) you did both of you , helpe and defend one another , as well as you could . Yes Sir , said they . It is very well ( replyed the Generall ) I like well of it , and I must needs say , you haue borne your selues well in the businesse . But where is the purse ? I haue it here in my bosom●… , said Ricciolina . Let me see it , said the Generall . The young wench presently pluckes it out of her bosome . Then said his Excellency vnto her ; Pou●…e them out ( laughte●… ) there vpon the board , and tell them anew , to s●…e if you haue all , and that the Conde hath not taken any of them from you , She did so , and found the number iust . Whereupon , she told his Excellency they were all there , and not so much as one crowne missing . Then the Generall ( who was a very wise and discreet man ) perceiuing the Condes goodnesse , and these other womens wickednesse , spake and said : Sign●…r Conde , Take you your money againe , you haue fought hardly for it ; it is yours , put it vp .

Then , turning to this young queane , looking sternly vpon her , he said vnto her ; Thou lewd and filthy baggage , if thou hadst defended thy selfe as well as thou didst thy money , the Conde could not haue forced thee ; but it seemes thou wast very wel conte●…t that he should haue his pleasure of thee , and hauing consented to his will , you we●…e not forced ( Minion ) as both you and your mother haue falsly accused the Conde , to whom we iustly award his re-hauing of his 400 Crownes . And as for you , get you gone , and let me heare no more of you , and be glad that you scape so , for if you were well serued , and punished according to your deserts , I should send you to Bride well , and haue you well whipt , & ring your mother out of Towne , for an old wicked B●…d . The Generall hauing pronounced this so iust a sentence , the businesse was ended to the great contentment of all that heard it , and to his owne no small commendation .

But to come into o●…r ●…ld way againe : No force of man can preuaile against T●…ing R●…es . the woman that is vnwilling . But say such a thing might once in a thousand yeares chance to happen ; me thinkes it is no reason , that a businesse of this nature should be compounded withall for money , much lesse inioyne them mariage , ( vnlesse he had formerly giuen her his word and faithfull promise before witnesses ) but that in this case , the fittest meanes , were personall punishment , either more , or lesse , according to the qualitie of the delict , and that the cause might be handled before the Kings Atturney General , that there might be no hope of pardon left , to such boysterous offendors . Assuring my selfe , that by this meanes , men would haue more feare ; and women more shame : and would not , so often , as now they doe , commit such like sinnes , and treacheries , as these . For , this refuge being taken from them , and hauing no hope of remedie , or helpe left vnto them , they would leaue this lewd course of life , and not be so hastie , to vndoe both them-selues , and others . If a wench goe to it with a good will , why should shee vrge , it was against her will ? Or if perhaps shee haue not where-withall to liue , why should shee picke a liuing out of such disgracefull , and dangerous deceits ? There are a thousand other , and farre more honest wayes , for a woman to liue by , then these .

But here pitie ( me thinks ) comes in , and pleads thus ; A lack , poore women , Women , weake creatures . they are weake & simple , and suffer them-selues to be ouercome through their too much facilitie and aptnesse of beleefe , and mens too much falshood in their promises ; and therefore they ought to be much fauoured and pityed by vs . Their facile nature , and mens false promises , haue wrought them much ●…e . I confesse this plea to be true . But if they were either taught , or knew before hand them-selues , that this their facilitie is a fault in them , and that they ought not to be so easily wonne , they would learne the better to keepe their cabinet close , and not to depart with so pretious a iewell , but vpon very good tearmes . And this foolish confidence of theirs , hath vndone many a woman , and is like to vndoe more , vnlesse they looke a little better to them-selues . This destroying confidence of theirs , is like vnto faith , without good workes , which hath sent thousands packing to Hell . Let no woman therefore ( if shee be wise ) depend vpon mens promises , be they neuer so faire : for they promise with passion , performe with delayes , and seldome or neuer satisfie expectation . That woman therefore , I say , that shall trust any mans faith or promise , and shall vpon such false assurance , surrender vp her Copie-hold into his hands , let her blame no bodie but her-selfe , if shee be afterwards cozened , and deluded by him .

There is another kinde of iniustice in the world , somewhat neere in this nature , which would require some reformation . You shall ( which I haue seene oftentimes ) haue two fellow-seruants lodge together in one house , who being agreed vpon the businesse , and both very willing to enioy each other , shee ( like a silke-worme ) continues her three m m Your Silke-wormes make three sleepe : Awaking after their first , to feed ; then falling againe to sleepe , till they begin to worke their balls . Neuer leauing off , till they shut vp them-selues in those balls , and consume them-s●…lues , vngorging all that sli●…nesse , whereof they forme the ball . Covatr . pag. 327. sleeps with him , till at last their Master comes vnawares vpon them , and takes them in the manner : Who , thereupon , layes hold on this his vnfortunate seruant , who neither tasted the creame , nor the cheese of this milke , but only that sowre whey , which is cast out to the dogs and the swine : He puts him in prison , where he keeps this poore soule so long , till at last growing desperate , he is driuen to marry her ; and the more to increase his miserie , they condemne him in a pecuniarie punishment , which he , and all his whole linage , if they were sold to their shirts , are not able to pay . When he sees him-selfe thus vndone , being first forced to marry whether hee will or no ; and then to haue all that little that he hath , to be taken violently from him , and torne as it were out of the very throat of him , he goes one way , and shee another : He runnes about the Country , and turnes rogue ; and shee stayes at home , and turnes whore . I pray see , what a proper mariage this is , what a wise and worthy sentence , and the great good that comes of it ?

O , if there were some prouision made for the reforming of this abuse , I doubt not but it would doe very much good , and proue profitable for the Common-wealth . I paid the punishment of that sinne , wherein I had not offended ; and the price of that meat , whereof I had not tasted : I had prouided me a house , put Guz●…an . prouides him a house of his 〈◊〉 . all things in order , and withdrew my selfe thither , with all that I had ; for I was much afraid , lest I might be serued with the same sawce by another Hostesse , as I was by this . And because I was likewise iealous , that the Collar and Girdle , which my Vnckle had sent me , being peeces of that great value , as they were , might , by the fame that went of them , come to be discouered , I was the willinger to retyre my selfe to an house of mine owne , where I might with secrecy all alone by my selfe deface the same , and so alter the fashion , that they might not be knowne . I did so ; taking out the pretious stones , and the pearles that Guzman alters the fashion of his Iewels . were in them , with the point of my knife , laying euery thing apart by it selfe . I did put all the gold into a great Crisoll , but not all at once , for it would not hold it ; six or seuen such pots , being scarce able to containe it , which in the end I made a shift to melt ; and preparing it with a little sublimate ( for I had some superficiall knowledge in that kinde of Art ) hauing all my tooles , and moulds in a readinesse , befitting such a businesse , I did ( when I found my selfe best at leysure ) cast the whole masse into seuerall ingots , or little barres of gold . And I thought I did very wisely therein , lest by sauing their workmanship , my selfe might haue made worke for the hang-man ; and by keeping them in fashion , beene my selfe in no fashion : and therefore thought it better to spoyle that , then that should spoyle me . With these stones , I began to turne Ieweller , first informing my selfe very well of their true worth and value , causing some of them to be set in Crucifixes , some in rings , some in pendents for the eares , and other some ●…n Iewels , as they would sort and fit best , differencing the setting and inchasing of them , as I saw cause : so that of the same gold and stones , I made diuers and sundry peeces : whereof I sold some for ready money , others I lent out at weddings with good gaines , and others I rifled away at dice ; insomuch , that I lost little of that which I might otherwise haue gained , had I preserued their fashion , and with a great deale lesse feare of danger to mine owne person . My stocke began to increase a pace , I knew how to sell at deare rates vpon trust , and how otherwise to afford a reasonable good penny-worth : I could tell how to turne and winde my money to the best profit ; and I wanted no credit , because I was flush of money .

There was close a●…ioyning to my house , certaine ground , that was to be sold for the building of houses vpon it . I thought good to buy a plot thereof for to build vpon , that I might haue a house of mine owne to put my head in , making choyse rather of a little corner of mine owne purchasing , then to goe euery m●…neth chopping and changing of our lodging , lugging our bedding on our backs , and being at a continuall charge in remouing of our houshold stuffe . Well , I agreed with the owner of the Land , I paid him his full price in good Royals , holding the same for euer , the Lord reseruing only for himselfe a yearely rent of two Royals . I built a house vpon it , wherein I spent before I was aware ( and now there was no turning backe ) aboue three thousand Ducats . It was a neat pile , handsomly contriu'd , and of good receipt , and stood finely for Guzman turnes Merchant . pleasure and entertainment . There did I liue , with that poore trading that I had , like a Fucar ; and there should I haue ended my dayes like a Prince , if my hard fortune , and greedy ill lucke had not crost me , by the vnhappy encounter of a crafty knaue , with a couetous wretch . For my house being so well furnisht , my person so well respected , and my reputation standing on such good termes , as it did , there was not a foole wanting , who had a moneths minde to make me his sonne in law : Who had a conceit , that I was all good meat , and that I had not ( like the grape ) some stonie kernels in me , that were to be taken out , and throwne away , as good for nothing .

This also is another great folly ( and I feare me too much in vse ) that men should be so simple , as to marry their daughters , to the sonnes of vnknowne parents . Take heed , take heed , I say , how thou bestow'st thy childe : Thinke vpon that old , but sound counsell of our fore-fathers ; Al hijo de tu vezino , metelo en tu Prouerbe . c●…sa : n n Al hijo de tu vezino , metelo e●… tu casa . Match thy daughter with thy neighbours sonne : Thou knowest his breeding , his disposition , his behauiour ; what his honestie is , what his wisdome , what his means : but neuer admit thou a new-commer , or receiue him for The care a father ought to haue in the bestowing of his daughter . thy sonne in Law , who is a meere stranger vnto thee : For such a one , though thou see him to day in his owne house , may to morrow be led thence to the gallowes if he chance to be knowne , and found out what he is .

This silly foole was a kinde of trucker of commodities as well as my selfe ; Prouerbe . and o o Acude cada vn à su natural . birds ( you know ) of a feather , will still flocke together . He clung so close to me , that he glew'd me vnto him : He marryed me to his daughter , hauing no other childe in the world : He was rich , shee was faire , and of a good and gracefull behauiour . He promised me with her , three thousand Ducats , and I was well contented with it . He , who was a subtle fellow , and knew the dapps of the world , and could winde a penny to the best aduantage , had no ambition to seek any higher , then to finde out a man of my making , that knew how to employ my money to profit . And in this he had reason : For better is a poore sonne in Law , that is a good husband , and knowes when to saue , and when to spend a penny , then one that is rich , and a great waster . And there is no wise father ( I assure my selfe ) but would rather haue a man without money to his sonne in Law , then money without a man . This man had a wonderfull great affection vnto me , we were agreed on the point , the conditions were drawne , the writings sealed , and the mariage solemnized .

Now I am a marryed man , now am I entred into an honest and honourable Guzman marries a wife . calling , I haue a mistresse now in my house , well contented with her choice , much made of , and well serued . Some dayes passed ouer , ( which were not many ) when as my father in law , carrying vs home with him one Sunday to dinner , after that the cloath was taken away , we three being all alone , he said thus vnto me ; Sonne , being now growne old , and hauing in my life time past through many troubles , and for that I see thou art yet but a yong man , and stand●…st now but at the foot as it were of the hill , that thou mayst get vp to the top , with the greater ●…ase , and that thou maist not tumble downe backward when thou art halfe wayes vp , I will deliuer thee my opinion , as one who is so much interessed as I am in thy good ; otherwise I should saue that labour , and not giue thee any part of that which I now pretend to doe .

First then I would haue thee to consider , that if thou shalt diminish one farthing Guzmans father in law his aduice . of thy stocke , which thou windest and turnest in the world , it will quickly be consumed , be it neuer so great . You must likewise haue a care to vphold and maintaine your credit ; And if you meane to bee a Merchant , you must carry your selfe like a Merchant ; laying aside all that which is not integrity and plaine dealing , for there is no negociating now adayes , but with it and with money ; changing , and re-changing as the market goes ; making , according as you see the times are , either more or lesse gaine . I shall stand still by you , and be euer ready to giue you my helping hand , and hold you vp by the chinne , that you may not sinke , if it be in my power to beare you vp . But if at any time ( which God forbid ) the Dice should turne , and that lucky chance which we looke for , should not come , take physicke in time , purge your selfe while you are in health , of your bad humors , and by a prouident forecast , preuent all future sicknesse . This said , he caused two bils of debt to bee brought in , and two counter-bils of credit , and going on in his discourse , hee said thus vnto me ; One of these writings shall be to this effect , that you acknowledge your selfe to be indebted vnto mee in the summe of foure thousand Ducats , which I haue lent vnto you ; against which ( to saue you harmelesse ) I will make a Counter-bill , wherein I w●…ll confesse a full satisfaction and true payment of the said debt , in such ample manner as you your selfe shall be pleased to deuise it . Both which wee will safely keepe to helpe our selues at a pinch , if need should require ; though it were much better , that no such occasion should offer it selfe , nor come ( as I hope it neuer shall ) within our doores . The other writing sh●…ll be , that I will procure my brother to sell vnto you an annuall rent that he hath , of fiue hundred Ducats , de p p Iu●…o , is a ●…yall rent raised vpon 〈◊〉 , ●…wnes , and other places of the ●…ingdome , so ●…uea à , ure , which the Kings haue to sus●…e thems●…lues withall , ●…nd to pay the 〈◊〉 of his ●…ts of ●…ce . An●… from ●…ence it had the name of 〈◊〉 . This kind of Tribute is due vnto the Kings of Spaine , for their ayde and maintenance . Covarr . ve●…b . 〈◊〉 . juro , and it shall be done in this manner ; There will not one cash-keeper or other , be wanting vnto vs , who ( out of the acquaintance and friendship that is betweene vs ) will be willing to make show o●…●…o much money , to the end that the publike Notary , may a●…ow and testifie the payment thereof ; or else we will take it there , and they shall lend it vs in banke , paying for the vse thereof fifty Royals ; and when this bill of sale shall be made ouer vnto you in as absolute manner as Law can deuise it , you shall returne the same backe againe vnto him , giuing him full power to dispose thereof , and by a writing vnder your owne hand , you shall acknowledge that this was but a feigned thing , put ouer vnto you onely in trust , and that really and truly , those fiue hundred Ducats , are , and were alwayes his , and that you can by no meanes pretend any lawfull claime vnto them . I liked very well of it ; supposing , it might doe me much good , but could doe me no harme .

I did as he directed me , who had beene an old beaten Souldier in these kinde of businesses , had taken all the degrees of a cunning dealer , and knew the true tracke , wherein he was to trade , by which trickes and deuices , he had wrought him-selfe into a fortune , and come to be so rich as now he was .

This foundation , being thus laid , I continued my trading a pretty whiles , b●…ing alwayes in all things , very circumspect and punctuall : And because I was not ignorant , that the credit of those that are great dealers in the world , doth depend much vpon ostentation , faire showes , and flourishes , I did make the world beleeue , that my house , my wife , and my selfe , were in a fulnesse of plenty , and wanted nothing that was for ornament or necessary vse . And in particular , my word , in all my dealings , was like a clocke , it strucke alwayes true , and neuer went false . My wife had a hole q q Muger , de ma●…o 〈◊〉 This phrase 〈◊〉 taken in the worser part . Cova●…r . pag. 478. bored through her hand ; all ranne out to waste , that was powred into it ; an angre had likewise pierced her temples , whereby her hogges-head had taken the vent of vanity . And I ( kind foole ) seeing the world thr●…u'd with me , and that my gettings were great , began to giue way to her idle desires , & to humour these her womanish appetites , giuing her greater liberty , then in discretion I should haue done ; and she for her part took so much on the other side , stretching euery inch to an ell , that she spent excessiuely , and beyond all manner of measure in the accompanying & entertaining of her friends , in her banquets , feasts , and other inter-mealary-intertainmen●…s , b●…sides the great pompe of her apparell , iewels , dressings , and a thousand Prou●…rbe . other the like gallantries , with as many bobs , and other r r Trac●…●…as rabos que vn polpo . Covarr . pag. 600. dingle-dangles , hanging at euery one of these , as the Polypus hath tales ; All these things concurring with that dear●…h and scarcity which be●…ell vs in these our first yeares , and that small correspondence which we had in trading , it being a dead world , I began at length to know mine owne weaknesse , and was taken on the sodaine with such a swimming and giddinesse of the head , that I was scarce able to stand on my legges , and lackt little of falling like a lumpish piece of Lead , flat to the ground : So true is that saying ; s s Nad●…e sabe , si no es el que lo lasta , lo que semejante ca●…agasta . No man knowes , ( saue who by proofe doth taste ) Prouerbe . What a good house , and a bad wife waste .

If now in these dayes , there were made a Law ; that whereas in Castile they allow the halfe of that which a man hath to his wife , in way of dowry ; that the husband should not onely not giue her that , but should rather take some of their wiues drowry from them ; they would then labour to get something , at least , seeke to saue what the husband gets ; Whereas now they take no farther care , then how they may waste and consume what the husband painfully brings in .

When I was a single man , I had wealth and trading enough , to haue made Gu●…man begins to sinke . my selfe a rich man in a short time ; but now , by hauing a wife I was growne poore , and rea●…y to goe downe the winde . And because my Father in Law was onely acquainted with my booke of Accounts , and knew as well as my selfe , what was owing to me , and what I did owe vnto others , and was true and trusty therin vnto me . I could not want credit ; & the rather , for that all men did verily beleeue , that those 500 Ducats of yearly reuenue were mine owne . With this prop I bore vp the burthen of my debts , till my back was ready to break , & when I could endure the waight of them no longer , I sodainly sunk like vnto a building that is raised on a false foundation . Now the time of my paiments drew neare ; & though time of it selfe doth naturally still run along , yet to those that owe money , it flies away with a swift wing , & seemeth shorter , then otherwise perhaps it would . I saw my present ruine before mine eyes , & was so perplexed with the very thought thereof , that I could not take any rest , nor knew in the world what to doe . In this perplexity of mind , I got me to my father in lawes house , that I might break my griefs vnto him , and communicate my cares with him ; He comforted me the best that he could , and wisht me not to be dismaid , for that we had a salue for this sore in our owne hands , & that the remedy for this malady , was here at home within our owne doores . He takes his cloake , throwes it on his shoulders , and away hee and I goe together to one that was Escriuano de Prouincia , the publike Notary of that Prouince , an especiall friend of his , and carrying him to Santa Cruz , which is a certaine Church adioyning to the Market-place , and stands right ouer against the prison , and those Offices belonging there into , there we made in secret vnto him a priuate relation , how the case stood with vs . Then said my father in Law vnto him ; Sennor N ▪ This businesse shall be many Ducats in your way ; you know very well how I dealt with you in my last troublesome sute , and how fairely things were carryed betwee●…e vs on both sides ; and I must also truly confesse vnto you , that by your good meanes , all the decrees and sentences that were published in that cause , came forth in my fauour , turning greatly ( for the which I must euer thankeyou ) to ●…y profit and credit , which makes me hope ( presuming vpon your wonted lou ) for all good from your hands . My sonne in Law , owes by a former writing to th●…s of mine a 1000 D●…cats , and this is already presented , and diligences vsed ther●… 〈◊〉 in another Office ; yet we are both of vs very willing , that all this business●… hould be brought before your Worship , & that you should haue the ordering of it ; in consideration whereof , we hope you will deale well with vs , & vse vs f●…endly , being so much your seruants , as we are ; for I shall not only my selfe req●…e this your kindnes to your own good content & liking ; but my son , that is hee with me , shall , when our businesse is dispatcht , bestow 200 Crownes on yo●… to buy you gloues ; and I will passe my word vnto you for him , and shall see yo●…ly paid . The Escrivano told vs ; All shall be done to your mind , & as well as you your selues would haue it . Let this bil , said he , of 4000 Ducats be first presened , & we shall accord the debt for ten in the hundred , by means of a friend , to ●…hom we will giue an account of this pretension , to the end that he may doe it ●…on any reasonable consideration , that we shall giue him , and for the rest lay ●…he care vpon me , and leaue it to my charge . My father in Law , presented hi●…●…wne bond : In conclusion , I was carryed to prison , al my goods were seazed Guzman committed to prison . o●… my wife shee brings forth the Indenture for her Dowry , taking so much cath to them-selues , that there was a great deale of stuffe wanting to make vp 〈◊〉 . For both of them , hauing possest them-selues of my house , my b●…s , and my moucables , there was nothing now left for mee to take hold on ●…h my teeth . And for my Iewels , and my moneys , they were sold , and spent , ●…d that little that was remayning , was too farre out of my reach to come at it .

When my Creditors saw me cl●…pt vp , they came all vpon me , entring their ●…ctions against me , presenting their bils and their bonds before diuers & sundry ●…otaries : But when this bond of ours was brought forth , all were to yeeld to hat , as one that commanded all the rest , and had already past the Office , as be●…g the most ancient debt , & therefore ought to be seru'd first . For the Alcaldes , ●…eeing it was res iustificata , a good and authenticall bond , and proued so to be , gaue order that should be first satisfied . When they saw what an ill hand they Prouerbe . had of it , and that they could not come to finger my goods , they presently went about to imbarque those my 500 Ducats of that annuall rent , before specified . But the true owner then appeares , & defends his owne right , my wifes Vnckle clayming those , as belonging properly vnto him . Then they fell to Law about it , whose bills , and answers , together with other writings , processiue , iustificatiue , obligatiue , testamentiue , partitiue , acquisitiue , renunciatiue , and infinite other the like , being as the body of a great Armie , when they were all ioyn'd together , came to no lesse then two thousand and fiue hundred sheets of paper . Euery one , that came to demand them , for to carry them to his Aduocate , when he saw , that he must , before he could haue them , pay so much money to the Notarie , he did tremble at it . And albeit there were some , that were at the charge ; yet there were other some , who seeing that they were like to haue a cold sute of it , and that they should but throw away their money in vaine , would not be at the cost to take them out , but did rather desire to come to some indifferent termes of agreement , & to sit downe with losse , then to be at any more charge , and in a cholericke humour , to cast the * * Echar la soga , tras el caldero . Caldero , is commonly taken for a bucket , which serues to take water out of a Well . Now , echar la ●…oga , tras el caldero , To sing the rope after the bu●…ket , is , when we haue lost one thing , to throw the other after it . This prouerbe is taken from one , who going to draw water out of a well , the buck●…t slipping from the rope , and falling into the Well , in a rage throwes the rope after it , wherewith , if he would but haue had the patience , he might haue ●…ot vp his bucket againe . Covarr . verb. Caldero . Guzman released . cord after the cauldron . They well perceiued , that albeit they had taken out a Copie of the Processe , they were as far to seeke of their money , as before ; And therefore seeing there was nothing to be got by the bargaine , their losse remedilesse , and their debt desperate , they did helpe to negociate for me , and to come to composition with me . I demanded tenne yeares tearme ; and some of them were well contented with it . Then began my Father in law to stirre in the businesse , and because his was the greater debt , he wrought so with them , that the lesser debts followed the example of the greater , by which meanes I came out of prison , and was set at libert●… the Escrivano hauing well lickt his fingers on both sides : whosoeuer lost , I am sure he got well by the bargaine . After all these stormes , my ship , and goods sunke , I made a shift at last to get a land , I came swimming to the shore in a paire of li●…en linings , being stript of all the rest , yet were these linings well linde with ●…uer . I had a great deale of wealth of diuers poore men remayning still in my ●…ds , who had trusted me with all that they had , being deceiued by that credit ●…ich I had abroad in the world . I did in this , as I vs'd to doe in all the rest of my actions ; I was no changeling ; onely I proceeded herein with a little more credit , and a better kinde of name , which my other had no colour for . For albeit ●…is was no better then theft ( to speake the truth of it ) and plaine robberie ; y●…t I continued still with the name of Merchant , and not of Thiefe . By this , I go●… experience of that , which I knew not before . This roguish tricke , till now ●…d I neuer vnderstand what it was , nor did so much as once enter into the reck●…ng of it . This seemed vnto me cautelam damnosissimā , a very hurtfull warinesse , 〈◊〉 caution too too cautelous , which ought narrowly to be look't into , and some g●…od remedy in this case to be prouided . For by these their counter-writings , the●… is no debt certaine , no assurance good , nor any true security to be had ; being ●…e most preiudiciall thing that can be to a Common-wealth . For , from thence ●…e occasioned most of your Law-sutes ; by meanes wherof , many of poore , com●…o Against fraudulent conueyances . be rich ; & many of rich , to be poore ; being thereby vtterly vndone , & driu●… to beg their bread from doore to doore . And it being the intention & purp●…e of a good Iudge , to auerre the truth betweene litigant and litigant , and suc●…s wage law one against another , & duly to administer Iustice to euery man arig●…t ; yet is it not possible for him in this case so to doe , because things are so intric●…e and so intangled one within another , that they which are most innocen●… , 〈◊〉 oftentimes most deceiued , and by consequence most wronged . And the r●… son of it is , because when a man doth plot a deceit or cozenage in this kind , 〈◊〉 goes warily to worke , & beats his braines how he may secure him-selfe , posse sing him-selfe before-hand of the ports and passages that lead vnto the truth , t●… the end , that the way thereunto may be barricado'd & blocked vp , that no bo●… may come vnto it . So that this light being taken away , the Iudge remayneth blinde , and that mans false play , which is not yet found out by Iustice , triumphs ouer truth , and go●…s away with the victorie . I know there are same , that will not sticke to say , that your counter-writings , for commerce and negotiation , are very necessarie ; b●…t I mast be so bold with these men , as to tell them plainely , that they are not . For he that is willing to help another m●…n with his credit , let him stand ( a Gods nam●… ) as a surety for him , & not as a cloaker of his knauerie . That which I learned in Barcelona , the first time that I was there , & now within The order in Barçelona , that is take●… with your Me●…hants . these two day●…s , since my returne from Italy , is ; That to be a M●…rchant , is a dignitie , and an honourable calling ; and no man can haue that title , vnless●… he be first presented before the Pri●… , & the C●…nsuls ; where he puts in securitie to deale faithfully & truly in the Trading , that he sh●…ll vndertake . And yet in Castile , where there 〈◊〉 such a Machina of merchandizing , such a great Trade driuen , where there is Co●…ractation for whatsoeuer commodities , the huge store-house of the 〈◊〉 doth in a manner afford , they take this noble pro●…ession vpon them , when as they are neither men of ab●…tie , nor able to put in good securitie for that which they deale for ; but are only ●…ich in shi●…ts and tricks , and more cunning in deceiuing those , who giue them credit , then skilled in an honest course of Trading . Euery one now , will take vpon him to turne M●…rchant ; whereas in other parts of the world , he that enters thereinto , had need of a good stocke to begin withall , & a greater euery day then other , if he meane to continue in that course . And if perchance it so fall out , that ( through want of a strong braine , or a strong purse , or both ) their businesses fall out contrary to their expectation , & succeed otherwise then their false imagination did suggest vn●…othem , making vse of these their counter-writings , they remaine in better and richer estate , then th●…y did before . I need not to instance in particulars , because it is exemplified vnto vs by daily experience . With their breaking , they pull a great many others after them , especially all those , that haue trusted them with their goods ; who consume that little t●…t is le●…t them in s●…ing fo●… their owne . And if pe●…ad 〈◊〉〈◊〉 they be O●…ficers , or Husband-men , the Lord with their losse , loseth likewise his part ; wanting those by this meanes , which should follow his profi●… , and ●…eceiue his ren●…s , and his 〈◊〉 and the Common-wealth thereby rob'd of the ●…rauell & paines of th●…se 〈◊〉 & industrious day-labo●…rers , & honest husband-men ; who being 〈◊〉 in sutes or Law , cannot apply themselues to follow the plough , & to manure & d●…esse their land as they were wont to do . Lesse harme it were a great deale , that a few , and those b●…ggage-people , should not be rich , then that a great many good & honest men , should be onerthrowne , and vndone by them . I●…●…t were not for these Co●…ter-writings , and fraud●…lent deeds , men might more securely trast one another , and there would be much better dealing in the world : For then a man m●…ght haue certaine knowledge of his estate and meanes , whom he trusts , without hauing other owners step forth , and challenge all that he hath to be theirs . And because it may be , that at some time or other , there will be order taken for the remedying of this so great a misc●…iefe , I will onely briefly tell the effects ( that I may be as good as my wo●…d ) of this harmefull coz●…age , if they d●… not the sooner leaue off these their da●…nable fraudulent trick , and de●…ses . For qu●…stionlesse , many men would deale more honestly and plainely , then now they doe , if these f●…bs and giggs , were not put into their heads by oth●… . And hence i●… i●… , that many thing●… lose those good effects , which otherwise they wo●…ld take , 〈◊〉 that these strange owners are not made knowne in 〈◊〉 , w●… 〈◊〉 no●… only inue●… , but execute what they haue de●…ised , cheating ●…he Creditor 〈◊〉 that just debt which is due vnto him . I cannot choose but speake my mind●… and 〈◊〉 the●…e be no ca●…e taken for 〈◊〉〈◊〉 of this gr●…e 〈◊〉 , I ●…not d●… withall . It shall su●…ice me , that I haue herein s●…tisfied t●…at 〈◊〉 and dutie , 〈◊〉 in ●…is c●…se is required at my ha●… . 〈◊〉〈◊〉 likewise looke t●… thei●… obligations ; and seeing , they neither want age , nor discretion to looke into these things , let them not also be wanting in their good will , to redresse that , which is so necessarie for the seruice of God , and of their King , it concerning so much as it doth the generall good of the Common-wealth .

When a poore Merchant is minded to enter into great trading , he intreats ( for the increase of his credit ) some kinsman , or friend of his , that he will make ouer some land of good value , or other his goods in trust , for the which hee makes him a Counter-writing , wherein he acknowledgeth , that notwithstanding these parcels of lands or goods seeme to the world to be his , yet really and truly it is not so , and that he shall be ready at all times to resigne them vp into their hands , to whom of right they belong , whensoeuer they shall demand the ●…ame of him . And so with the credit of this seeming stocke of his owne , he gets farther credit of others , & takes vp vpon trust , what he will him-selfe . See now , what a kinde of people we are , and what true dealing there is amongst vs ! How like vnto those Moores and Negro's of Ghinie , an ignorant and barbarous kinde of people , who with counterfeit beads , false eare-rings , bells , and other the like bables , which children weare about their necks , doe with the bare sound , gay show , and glorious glittering of these glassie commodities , cozen and deceiue vs . If their trading thriue well with them , it is well ; for then the Creditor shall receiue what is due vnto him : If ill , they haue a trap , wherein to catch their Creditors , and all goes ill with them . Then he , that made ouer his goods vnto him in trust , comes by a Counter-writing to recouer them , and all the rest are defrauded of their due .

When a man will not pay what he owes ; before the day of payment comes , that this debt is due , the debtor selleth , or absolutely passeth away all his whole estate in trust by some fraudulent deed , or counter-writing in that kinde . And it afterwards so falleth out , that before the day of payment come , the debtor , who made this cautelous prouision , dyes ; whereby the true Creditor cannot come to recouer his owne . For the party , whom the debtor trusted with his goods , doth couer and conceale this Counter-writing ; so that the Feoffe in trust carryes away all his goods , and the deuill the deceased downe to the pit of hell .

When a man hath a purpose to deceiue with his person , to get him a wife with a good dowry , the better to cozen both him-selfe and others , he runs the like course . He gets him-selfe to be trusted with a great deale of wealth ; and anon after that he is marryed , his debts begin to grow vpon him , and liuing at a greater charge then before , he is not able to pay what he owes . So the owner of these goods recouers his owne , and the new marryed couple fall into want . This his cozening of her , comming at last to be knowne , their loue begins to coole each towards other , and oftentimes they goe together by the eares , for that the wife will not consent that he shall sell away her dowry , or any way be charged with her husbands debts .

All which inconueniences , would finde a speedy and easie remedie , if there were an expresse command giuen , that there should be no such kinde of fraudulent deeds , and Counter-writings at all ; and if there were any , that they should be of no force or validitie in Law , and that any Act in that kinde should not stand good . And for the present , any such deed or deeds , to be published and made knowne within such a certaine time , vpon paine of taking the others debts vpon him . If this course were taken , men might then certainly know , what a mans estate were , and whether he were of that sufficiencie to be trusted , and to take vp vpon credit . And I dare be bold to say , that thereby one halfe of your Law-sutes would be excused ; for that most of those , which are here in Castile , are of this nature , or at least , haue their ground and beginning from thence .

CHAP. III.

Guzman de Alfarache prosecutes the successe of his mariage , till such time as his wife dyed . And how her Dowry returned backe to his father in Law . He discourseth of bad wiues , and the hurt which they doe their husbands .

READER ; Hast thou by this time considered with thy selfe , into what a Labyrinth I was willing to put my selfe ? What good can it doe me ? or why doe I spend and consume my time in vaine , basting stones with butter , and annoyn●…ing flints with oyle , to see if I can supple them , and make them become soft ? Doest thou thinke I shall make the Blackmoore white , by my often washing of him ? Or doest thou conce●…e , that any good will come of that which I haue said ? Will it bring forth any profitable fruit ? I rather beleeue that I spend my breath in vaine , beat my braines to no purpose , and lose both my cost and my labour , without receiuing either profit , or honour thereby . For I know I shall be tit in the teeth , with that old answer ; Why should he giue counsell to another , that cannot follow it himselfe ? It would haue suted better with me , to haue told them two or three merry tales , wherewith Mistresse such a one , and my Lady what you call ( who are now quite tyred out , and begin to nod , being brought a-sleepe with these fooleries ) might haue entertained them-selues , and past away the time . Me thinks I heare him say , who is now reading , what I haue written , that he will cast aside my booke , and rather get him-selfe into some corner , and there take a nap , then endure the trouble of hearing me talke . I confesse , he hath a thousand reasons on his side , to doe as he does ; nor can I blame him ; for , being truly ( as they are ) truthes , which I treat ; they are not so fit for entretinimiento , as sentimiento , enterta●…nment , as the vnderstanding ; being to be respected more , for the sense , then the conceit : These are not things fit for laughter , and to make merry when friends meet ; but are to be weighed with a great deale of studie , and consideration ; and to be ruminated , and chewed ouer , againe and againe . But because the purge , that I shall giue thee to cleanse thee , may not seeme loathsome vnto thee , or that thou mayst refuse to take it , propter malum olòrem & saporem , for its ill both smell , and taste , let vs guild ouer these our pills with gold , or couer them with the papp of an Apple , conserues of Roses , or some thing else , that may please both the eye , and the palate . And so I returne againe to the purpose , from whence I haue made this digression .

Now did I begin to lift vp my head againe , and to enter a-fresh into the world ; I had a new stocke a going , the best I could make , though much lesse then I could haue wisht it , and meaner then stood conueniently with my present both necessitie , and occasions . For to beare a good a a Para grande ca●…ga grandes fuerças Aduertisements for those that will marry . burthen , a man had Prouerbe . need of a good backe ; and they who build Towers on the sand , see them quickly fall to the ground . Those that haue a minde to many , must haue where withall to m●…ke the 〈◊〉 . The good man must be able to giue his wife a dinner ; and shee bring wherewithall to bestow on him a supper . There is more goes to mari●…ge , then two payre of leggs , in one payre of sheets . Foure naked walls , six carpets , two table-cloathes , and halfe a dozen napkins , are not a Dowry for a wife , when at the first entrance into the house , I m●…st spend vpon her in Iewels , and other idle dressings , that out of which I should picke my liuing . My principall was gone , and I was now in want . For ( as it is in the prouerbe ) Quien Prouerbe . compra lo que no ha menester , vende lo que ha menester : He that b b Quien comp a lo que no ha men●…ster , vende lo que ha menester . buyes that he needeth not , must sell that he hath need of . What profit can it be for a poore Tradesman , to tricke vp his wife in some six cha●…ge of gownes , wherein he consumeth his maine stocke ? Can he afterwards continue his Trade with this tr●…sh ?

My Gentle-woman , my wife , was ill acquainted , and lesse exercised in miseries . She had liued well at home with her father , she knew not there what want meant , but had the world at will , there was not that dainty shee desired , which shee had not ; but now in my house , she had nothing lesse , though as long as my wealth lasted , shee lacked not any thing , that shee had a minde vnto . But being not able any longer to hold out , shee was forced to worke and sweat for her liuing , and being not vsed heretofore to take paines , it seemed the harder vnto her to endure it . With that little , which was now remayning vnto me , I began to buy at deare rates vpon credit , and to sell good cheape for ready money , sicut erat in principio . I stood ingaged , and my father in Law bought the wares . I could haue wisht the ballance had weigh'd the contrary way . And these commodities that we dealt for , neuer went out of the house . Our ordinary wares , were gold thread , and sometimes wrought plate , and iewels of gold , handsomly set forth , curiously inchased , and for the fashion exceeding neat and delicate : Some other things we had of little or no value , old moth-eaten ware , which lay vpon our hands , and could not be rid away , which were bought at a farre lesser price . And thus out of those small gaines , that we made , we rubb'd out , and made a shift to liue as well as we could . But all was little enough to bring the world about , because our stock was so litle : & so by litle & litle , we went eating of it out , it consuming by degrees . And for all we were brought to this low ebbe , my wifes dowry was neuer so much as once touch't or fingred by me , that stood still on foot , being laid out vpon possessions , which my wife would neuer consent should be medled with : I could as well take the Moone in my teeth , as to come to lay hold on them ; nay I could not so much as haue a sight of them . These our commodities , we did deliuer forth vpon credit for foure moneths , with condition to haue a fifth part of the gaines . And that Escrivano ( whom we had ready vpon all occasions , to serue our turnes ) did alwayes make testification of the consigning ouer of these commodities , which goods , a Broaker presently tooke into his hands , who made vp the third person in these our dealings , and was all one as it were with my selfe and the Escrivano . And hauing them in this manner made ouer vnto him , within some two houres after he would bring the money to its owner , to such losse , as he him-selfe should say they were sold ( as was ordred betweene vs ) though he had not sold one penny-worth of them , but had them still in safe custodie , and were neuer so much as once remoued out of the house . We made vp the money amongst vs : He receiued an Acquittance for his discharge , and there was an end of this businesse .

It was a common tricke amongst vs , to make vse of a most cunning and subtill Gentlemen in Spaine cannot be arrested for debt . stratageme , to the end that none might escape our fingers , by alledging his Gentilitie , or any other exception that might bestead him , or free him from arrest . When wee were to furnish any man , wee would first informe our selues , whether he had the meanes to pay vs ; and knowing him to be a sufficient man , and that he tooke vp such or such commodities , only to supply his present occasions , we did willingly giue him credit : howbeit , it would somtimes so fall out , that we should come short of this our reckning , and those men faile vs , whom we thought to be very good men , and of good wealth . But when wee had no perfect knowledge of the party , & that it did not sort to our purpose , we would demand a Surety , together with the morgage of some house , or peece of land , for default of payment . And howbeit we knew well enough , that this house , or land , thus morgaged was none of his , and that whatsoeuer he had was extended already for the payment of his debts , and that he had not so much as a tyle or bricke that was in it , which was not indebted in a crowne , yet we did not stand so much vpon that , nor was this the thing that we did much care for , and were willing it should be rather so then otherwise : But that which we did ayme at was this , To draw him to acknowledge by a writing vnder his owne hand , that this house or land , was his owne fee-simple , free from all kind of incumbrances , morgages , sessings , rents , feoffments of trust , or otherwise obliged for any other debt whatsoeuer . And with this assurance , when the time of paiment was come , if he brake his day with vs , we had an Alguazil still at hand , with whom wee were in league , who made him to giue vs so much for euery tenth part that we deliuered vnto him , and so wee presently came vpon the backe of him , putting our bond in execution .

And if at any time they would oppose the arrest , or did offer to make any resistance To resist an arrest in Spaine and to draw his sword against a Sergeant , is a whipping matter , besides a condemning to the Galleys ; and if he strike or hurt the Alguazil , it is punished with death . for to escape the hands of iustice , that he might not pay the debt ; then came we vpon him another way , bringing a criminall action against him , and making a diligent search and enquiry into his estate , we would proue that it was not extended to its true value ; that there was some legger-demayne vsed therein , and that he had dealt falsly and deceitfully to defeat his Creditors , laying to his charge many other his misdemeanors . And thus did we make sure worke for our selues , whilest the poore man slipt downe the hill , without being able to recouer himselfe , or to stay the force of his sodaine falling . Vsing this precaution , we plaid vpon sure cards , and without this prouision made before-hand , we seldome preuailed in our businesses . Whether this kind of dealing were lawfull or no , I know what I know ; but we ranne the same course wee saw others run before vs , we did no more then what others did ; our consciences were seared , so that we had no great sense or feeling of it . I well wot , that all the while I continued this wicked course of life , I did neuer truly confesse my sinnes ; and if I did come to Confession , I did not doe it as I ought to haue done , and performed that duty for no other cause in the world , but to satisfie the Parish , and to auoid Excommunication .

Wilt thou see whether it be so or no ? Consider whether I euer promist to make restitution , whensoeuer it should be in my power to doe it ? Or whether I had likewise a purpose to amend my lewd and wicked life , when at that time there were fifteene , twenty , or more bonds a foot of the like nature ; and yet did I neuer goe my selfe , nor vse any diligence by others , to acquaint those that were thus bound , that such and such a bond was vnlawfull , and that I had grated vpon them with a griping and biting Vsury ; and that for to cleare my conscience , and that I might worthily receiue the blessed Sacrament of the Communion , I would abate them of the ouer-plus , and make good all that which I had wrongfully and vnlawfully taken from them ? And how that I would restore vnto them besides , all that which I had , for that it was all stolne , and had nothing that I could iustly and truly say was mine owne . And if afterwards , when they came to pay me , I had no relenting in me , nor did not returne them any thing backe againe , what an intention must this be ? Certainly as bad as bad may be . This truly is that which I ought to haue done , but I did it not , nor is it in vse now-adayes to doe such good things as these . God ( if it be his will ) giue vs a due acknowledgement of our sinnes . And I verily perswade my selfe , that if then at that time I had finished this my life , my soule had assuredly gone downe to hell , and beene condemned to fry in that eternall fire .

O , your Vsurers , they are a wicked generation of Vipers : they haue neyther any conscience , nor any feare of God . O what a braue , and what a sure marke is this to shoot at ! Howneere am I now to the drawing of mine arrow vp to the head ? And how doe these traiterous villaines , these Caterpillers ofa Common-wealth , stand peeping and watching to see how , and where , I meane to hit . O , what a temptation doe I feele , what a strugling doe I finde in my selfe , & what adoe to pull in this hand and arme of mine , from letting fly my whole sheafe of arrowes at them , and so to wound and gall them on all sides , that I leaue no part about them vntoucht , and no bone in their whole body vnbroken ▪ For , in regard that I am ( as they say ) Ladron de casa , a house-thiefe , one of the same stamp , I know them as well as they know them-selues , & am not only acquainted with their actions , but euen with their very thoughts , & secrets of their hearts . Will you giue me leaue to giue them a gentle nip , and that I make them to see their owne perdition , and put them into such a great confusion , that they shall not know in the world what to do●… with them-selues . I know that ye will not , and I also know why you will not .

But if I shall speake the truth , I must plainly tell you , Riches are the cause of This is a digression . Against the greedy de●…re of riches . all this . But when they are ill gotten , in what misery liues the soule of such a one ? Certainly , it is in a very bad case . And hence it commeth to passe , that couetous men too much deuoted vnto riches , incurre infinite troubles , perils , and hazards . And therefore to free himselfe from this danger , and the better to secure himselfe , Crates the Thebane , that most famous Philosopher , with an vndaunted Crates throwes his goods into the Sea . courage , bound vp in one pack or fardell together all the gold & other such precious Iewels as he had , & with great fury threw them into the sea , saying : get you gone , ô ye riches , into the bottome of the sea , lest you drench me in the deepe . I had rather drowne you then you should drowne me . But this great Philosopher ( by his leaue ) did herein ( me-thought ) very ill . Much better had he done , if he had distributed these his goods amongst the poore : but in doing that which he did , he gaue vs therby to vnderstand the great trouble that gold bringeth with it ; so that to him it seemed a farre lesser inconuenience to remaine poore , then to liue in so many griefes and afflictions , as riches occasion in those that possesse them . What other thing is it to enter with consideration into the minde of the rich , then to enter into a fearfull prison , where within we see men imprisoned , laden with irons , bound with chaines , fetter'd , manacled , and girt about the necke with collars of iron , wherewith they are brought before the Iudge ? And how many then are the afflictions , and the torments , of these miserable and wretched men , thus incarcerated , and compassed in with strong wals , and hard chains ? And how much more are they oppr●…ssed , and how much heauier are their shackles , who Ioue riches , and those most bound , who most abound in them ? And as there is more compasiion had of those which are in these miseries , and are thus fast bound , and painfully laden with bolts , manacles , collars and chaines of iron , about their fee●… , hands , necks , and their whole body throughout : So much more pitie is there to be taken of the rich , and see how much the richer hee is , and the more wealth hee hath about him , and all those good things which his heart desireth , yet for all this are we not to account him a rich and wealthy man , but rather wretched and vnfortunate : For besides the prison , wherein he liues ( miserable as he is ) he findes himselfe attended and guarded with a barbarous and cruell keeper , which is the loue of riches . And if it so happen , that thou fall at any time into their hands , there is no getting out of their clutches : but that they may keepe thee safe when they haue thee , and that thou maist not escape from them , they will haue three or foure strong doores shut vpon thee , and as many great chaines to make all sure , besides locks and keyes , with I know not how many double wards and bits , that all the picklockes in the world , that euer haue beene , shall , or will be , shall not be able to open these doores , and set thee free from thence . And yet these wretched creatures are so blinded in the pleasure which they take in this their imprisonment , that they neuer thinke vpon it , nor seeke to get out , but are content to continue in it all the dayes of their life .

Bona●…enture saith , that he who hath once set his affection on gold , can hardly with-draw his loue from it . King Dauid saith , That our soule cleaueth vnto the dust , and that our belly trayleth on the ground , and is as it were fastned and glued to the earth : Vnfolding thereby the affection which we haue to these earthly thing . For seldome or neuer are riches possessed , without a mans setling his affection vpon them , it being so easie a thing to haue it wedged to the things of this world . And by so much the more , by how much the more strongly the heart of man is knit vnto them . The Glosse saith , That with difficultie wee despise them ; and with lothnesse leaue them . But the safest and surest way is , neyther to loue them , nor to keepe them . And therefore that Kingly Prophet said , If riches increase , set not thy heart vpon them . True it is , that they are as hurtfull for the soule , as dangerous for the body . And therefore our Sauiour Christ , much pitying and lamenting those who possessing them , did heartily loue them ; said : Woe vnto you that are rich , for yee haue already receiued your comfort . And S. Iames likewise with a great deale of griefe and sorrow , doth bewaile and lament these kind of men , saying ; Goe to now yee rich men , weep and howle for the miseries that shall come vpon you : your riches are corrupted , and your garments moath-eaten : your gold and siluer is cankred , and the rust of them shall be a witnesse against you ; and shall eate your flesh , as it were fire : you haue heaped treasure together for the last dayes . Behold , the hyre of the Labourers , which haue reaped downe your fields , which is of you kept backe by fraud , cryeth : And the cryes of them which haue reaped , are entred into the eares of the Lord of Sabaoth . Yee haue liued in pleasure on the earth , and beene wanton ; yee haue nourished your harts , as in a day of slaughter . Yee haue condemned and killed the iust , and he doth not resist you . Bemourne therefore the miseries wherein you are , for your riches shall end in anguish and vexation of spirit , and all your comforts shall forsake you : you shall sleepe your sleepe , and when you awake finde your hands empty .

Dauid saith , Rich men turne fooles through their too much wealth : they become ambitious and vaine , they giue themselues ouer to a thousand vices ; they suffer a thousand sharpe iourneyes , and as many troublesome toylings , for to get riches ; which when they haue got , they haue a daily fit of feare and trembling , lest they may chance to lose them . The imagination of their losse causeth extreame sorrow in them : their braines are still working , and their vnderstanding neuer taketh any rest . For , ( as our Sauiour said ) Where a mans treasure is , there also is his heart . O wretched man , thou dost not any thing in this world , that is so bad for thee , as the loue of money . For they , that seeke to make them-selues rich , fall into a thousand temptations , and into as many snares , which the Deuill hath laid to intrap them . For the root of all euill , is couetousnesse . This causeth vs to commit sacrileges , thefts , murders , rapines ; it is the author of symony , the causer of vs●…ring contracts , of vngodly gaine , and of a thousand deceits , and frauds , of breakings , both in our deeds , and in our words , of periuries , and peruerting of iustice . O , what an vnquenchable fire , is the desire of riches ; O how insatiable is this our lust , but much more insatiable our will . Tell me ( he that can ) who did euer yet see the rich man satisfied ? who , heare him say , That he had now enough ? For , when hee hath got what he desired , he hath no sooner obtained it , but he is as greedy as hee was before ; like vnto your hungry Curres , who when you throw them one morsell , stand gaping for another . His end is alwayes on that he desireth , forgetting how full hee is , and the store of wealth that he possesseth . The eye of a louer is neuer satisfied with looking ; And the couetous minde hath neuer money enough . But ( which is a curse that accompanieth the couetous ) he that loueth riches , neuer reapes the fruits of them . Hell is neuer satisfied with the swallowing downe of soules ; neither the eyes , nor heart of the couetous , with riches . For these wicked men , haue two horse-leaches belonging vnto them , which alwayes crye , giue me here , and giue me there ; let more and more come in still . By so much the more the loue of money increaseth , by how much the more our money increaseth . O what a false and vnfortunate felicity is that of riches 〈◊〉 because it maketh him truly vnhappy , who doth not truly possesse them .

The poore man liues more contented with that little which hee hath ; then the rich man that walloweth in his wealth . O how many haue beene deceiued with the desire of riches ! Balaam , hearing the ringing and sound of money , which King Balack offered vnto him , fell into despaire , and had a miserable end . Acha●… , being desirous of a rich rayment , and a wedge of gold , was slaine , and stoned to death , together with all his family . King Achab , out of the desire he had to haue Nabothes vineyard , was the occasion of Nabothes death , who by Iezabels order , wife vnto Ahab , was stoned to death : For which euill fact , Ahab was depriued of his life , and his Kingdome ; and his wicked wife Iezabel , the inuenter of this villany , deuoured of dogs . Gehezi , out of a desire to be rich , receiued so many changes of rayment ; for which hee was cloathed all his life time , with a most loathsome leprosie . Iudas , to get thirty pieces of siluer , lost his Apostleship , and his body , together with his soule , by becomming his owne executioner . Ananias and Saphyra , out of greedinesse of gaine , were sodainly strucken dead . If thou wilt bee rich , thou shalt not bee without sinne : for such is their miserable and vnhappy condition .

Moreouer , it induceth men to embrace vice and to abandon vertue ; it falling out for the most part , that where the●… is aboundance of riches , there is aboundance of pleasures , and sensuall delights , and of euill company , which are often an occasion of infinite infamies , and wicked actions , with great offence to the Maiestie of God . The rich thinke that God hath no power ouer them ; but they are much deceiued ; who with open eyes see them-selues carried headlong into hell . And this misfortune befals them , because the feare of God is not before their eyes ; and for that they loue not their neighbour as they ought : But rather on the contrary , loue their riches better then them-selues , nay more then their owne soules . O miserable and vnhappy men as you are ; looke , and diligently consider that which happened vnto Lazarus , that poore beggar , who receiued mo●…e contentment in that his extreame pouerty , and in those his ragges and stinking sores , liuing in the feare of the Lord , then in any other thing in this world ; by meanes whereof , he came to enioy those rich treasures of heauen , and the continuall and ete●…nall vision of his God . For a man to make him-selfe rich , it is a dangerous thing ; for before euer he is aware , hee drawes vpon him an infinitie of all kind of troubles and miseries . It is a wonder to see at how deare a rate they buy hell , who pretend to be rich ; seeing with how many restlesse trauailes , they purchase eternall torments .

Wicked and worldly-minded men , for a ●…tile vaine glory , or rather a smoke that sod inly vanish●…th , care not how many tribulations they vndergo ; for loue of this , they submit them-selues willingly to infinite sufferings , toyles , and sweats , and voluntary stoope their necke to the heauy yoake of so many woes . And why doe they this ? Onely for a little m●…cke . So that your rich men take a great delight in suffering annoyances , afflictions , tribulations , toylings , turmoylings , trauailes , troubles , vsing diligences , solicitudes , and placing all their care , and their study , in getting wealth , and with it , Hell . By which their ca●…ke , paines-taking , and sweats of blood , they gaine vnto them-selues eternall damnation . Doe ye not perceiue ( ye wretches ) that how much the more care yee take in hoording vp of riches , so many the more thieues , and murderers you prouide for your selues , that may rob you , & cut your throats ? whence it also commeth to passe , that they who did commit these outrages against you , are likewise for this their wickednesse whipped , sent to the Galley's if not to the Gallowes , and there hanged and quartered .

That man is a foole , that boasteth him-selfe of his riches ; For why should any man glory in that , which takes away the safety of his life ? Rich●…s depriue vs of our lib●…rty . We should be our owne , it these were not our owne : And masters of our selues , if these were not our masters . Riches take not away want , but occasion it ; draw not on content , but withdraw it from vs . They are massed vp with trouble , possessed with feare , & forgone with sorrow . The rich man therfore hath need of many things , and must submit himselfe to many basenesses , and vile ind●…ncies , being that he is euermore besieged and assaulted with feares , iealousies , and suspitions . They are full of perturbation , and confusion ; the common subiect of murmuring and repining . They scratch and scrape all that they can rap and wring from others . They are daily more and more inflamed with the desire of getting . In a word , they will commit any wickednes , or villanie whatsoeuer , so as they may be sure to get by the bargaine .

Hearken to that , which was deliuered vnto me by a famous Preacher , who A merry tale deliuered in the Pulpit by a Preacher . discoursing vpon this subiect of rich men , amongst many other things , I remember he told vs at that time of a certaine picture , the vpper and middle part of which square , or peece , was taken vp by a great rich man , which was there portrayed forth to the life : On his right hand , stood a roaring boy , to fight for him , if need were ; and on his left , a foole , to make his Worship merry , and to put him out of his dumps : both which were expressed in such a posture , as fitted best with them . Vnder this rich man , was drawne a country Clowne ; vnder the Clowne , a Merchant ; vnder the Merchant , a Counsellor at Law ; vnder the Counsellor , a Confessor ; vnder the Confessor , a Physitian ; and vnder the Physitian , the Deuill , with a long chaine , whose linkes were made of womens tongues , which kept a horrible ratling . And he farther added , that the rich man had written ouer his head ; These two I keepe : The Clownes word was ; I maintaine these three : The Merchants motto ; I rob these foure : The Counsellors posie ; I pill these fiue : The Confessors ; I absolue these six : The Physitians ; I kill these seuen : And the Deuill had a labell comming out of his mouth , which said ; I carry away all these eight with me to Hell .

All these , and many other the like mischiefes doe riches beget , whose possessor purchaseth no other fame , saue only ; Lo , there goes a rich man : their riches being their totall and eternall destruction . But your true riches indeed , are the vertues of the minde ; which like inuincible forts , defend those that possesse them . Against these , neither all the men in the world , nor all the deuils in hell can preuaile : They may wage warre against them , but they shall neuer ouerthrow them . O thou , that doest either reade , or heare me , make vertue the end and center of all thy desires , and there strike in the nayle , that it may sticke close vnto thee . And here I will stop my pen , that I may not runne my selfe out of breath , in the praysing of that , which is so well able to recommend it selfe . But I would haue thee withall to know , that as I haue purposely & willingly made this considerable digression ; so in all the course of my life , I haue not done any thing more vnwillingly , then to winke at these men , and to let them goe by , without leauing some pawne behinde them . But because they may not obiect vnto mee , that I spend all my discourse in Reformations , and in prying into other mens actions , I am the more willing to giue way vnto them , and for this once to let them alone . Another motiue , that makes me loth to meddle with these Vsurers , is ; That I may haue one day need of their helpe ; and I would not willingly make them mine enemies , whom afterwards I must sue vnto to stand my friends . In a word , we are so farre forth to keepe some kinde of men our friends , as we may haue occasion to vse them , and as they may be profitable and beneficiall vnto vs . And as a faithfull friend is knowne in doing good , in time of need ; so an enemie will neuer hide him-selfe , when he may do thee a mischiefe .

Onely this one thing I will say ; Let a man cast vp his reckonings with himselfe , and when he findes , that he comes short of his Account , and that he stands in need of 200 Ducats to make it vp , let him but take vp so much vpon Vse , and he shall see them amount in two yeere , to more then six hundred . To how much more then , if a man take vp more ? And therefore it is good to haue a care to the mayne , and to take heed , that we come not within such mens danger . For there is no such Cormorant , as Vsurie ; it deuoureth houses , and swallowes downe whole Lordships , as it were at a bit , and makes no bones of it . And if a man cannot get out of this bogg , when he is but ouer shooes , how shall he doe , when he is ouer boots ? Or how shall he satisfie a great debt , that is not able to discharge a small one . But here let your Vsurers ( for me ) rest in peace , and let me returne backe againe to my selfe .

I say then , that men , by not doing that which they ought to doe , come in the end , to pay soundly for that which they do . What doth it auayle a man to gaine much ? What good to get , if he know not how to keepe ? Especially , seeing we Prouerbe . are daily taught by experience , Que vale mucho c c Mas vale al cuerdo la regla , que al necio la renta . mas al cuerdo la regla , que al necio la renta : That a wise man will goe farther with a penny , then a foole with a pound . His poore pittance ( well husbanded ) shall bring him in more profit , then all the others rents , though neuer so great . Such great odds , hath moderation , of reuenue . He d d El que tuuiere tiempo , no aguarde otro mejor . that hath a time of it , let him take time , while time serues ; Prouerbe . and not lye lazing , looking for a better , yet let him not be so confident , nor so farre presume vpon his strength , that hee doe not keepe a good and carefull watch vpon him-selfe : He must looke about with many eyes , and that diligently to , hauing an eye here , and an eye there ; it often-times so falling out , that when we thinke our selues safest , and freest from danger , then ( when we least dreame of it ) we meet with a Martinus contra ; some pad in the straw , or some e e Vn Gil , que nos persiga . Giuing vs to vnderstand , that escaping one thiefes bonds , we fall into anothers . Gil to plague vs . I had money in my purse ; I once was rich , but now am Prouerbe . poore . God he knowes , why , and wherefore . I stood looking for a day , to set vp my rest , and how to order the remaynder of my life in some setled course ; but this day neuer came : I did build too much vpon mine owne strength ; it was euer my fault ; I presum'd I could recollect , and take vp my selfe , how , and when I listed : being verily perswaded , that though I could cozen and deceiue all others , I should neuer be such a foole , as to cozen my selfe . But here in me , you may see , how selfe-confidence , causeth a forgetfulnesse of God , and by trusting more to our selues , then to him , hence it commeth to passe , that we lose not onely our goods , but our soules . The greatest enemie that I had , was my selfe : Mine owne hands , wrought mine owne woe : And as the good actions of the good , are the reward of their vertue ; so the bad actions of the bad , are the occasion of their greater torment . M●…ne owne works did follow me . They were the furies that did persecute me : Whereof mine owne naughty dealing , and other mens wickednesse , were not the least part of this my miserie . And God doth therefore permit , that that , which we make the instrument of offending him ; the same he maketh to be our destruction . Nor did I so much grieue for the losse of my wealth ; for I knew full well , that the goods of fortune come with her , and with her goe their way . And that the more fauour shee showeth , the lesse certainty shee assureth . That which did vex me to the very heart , was ; That that , which should haue beene my comfort ( I meane my wife ) she , whom with such earnestnesse her father desired to marry vnto me , and vsed a thousand meanes to effect it , that shee , that was another my selfe , flesh of my flesh , & bone of my bone , that shee should rise vp against me , and proue a crosse vnto me , persecuting me without a cause , and for no other reason in the world , but only for that I was now growne poore . And that her hate should come to that height , that contrary to all truth , shee accused me of keeping a wench at rack and manger , seeking by this meanes to finde so much fauour as to sue out a diuorce , and procure a separation betweene vs , not wanting a Lawyer to aduise her thereunto , firming it with his owne hand , that shee might lawfully doe it .

This griefe , of all other , was the greatest vnto me ; this wound strooke deepest . For as Matrimonie once contracted , cannot be dissolued ; so when it is ill conioyned , it is hard to be endured . For a troublesome wife , is like vnto a house , Of good and bad women . whereinto the raine falleth , dripping into euery roome and corner thereof . And by how much the more shee shineth in wisdome , and good gouernment , when shee will apply her-selfe vnto vertue ; so much the more beastly she is , the more insupportable , and the more to be abhorred , when shee departeth therefro . What facilitie hath shee , in all those things , that shee hath a minde vnto ? What a cunning Scotist is shee , for to compasse what shee longs for ? Put the iudgements of a thousand men together , yet shall they not equall the wit of one single woman , for to frame a lye on the sodaine . And although it be commonly said , That when a man shuns company , and desires to be alone , he is aut Deus , aut Daemon , either a God , or a Deuill , either spending his time in his seruice , or liuing like a beast ; yet doe I say , that the solitude , which he suffereth all alone , is not so great , as is the punishment , which he receiueth , in hauing ill company , and such as are contrary to his liking . I was rich , when I was not mariyed ; mariyed , I became poore . The dayes of my Nuptials were ioyfull to my friends ; but those ensuing dayes of my mariage , sad and mournefull for me . T●…ey were iocond and merry , and went well contented home to their houses ; but I remayned to end are martyrdom in mine owne dwelling ; and for no other cause , but because my wife would haue it so , and for that shee was too proud , and presumptuous . Shee spent beyond measure , shee had a high minde , and a l●…berall hand ; and shee had beene vsed to see me come home , like the Bee , laden with much honey ; and that I had sweet commings in , bringing her still one dainty or other to please her : Shee could not endure , to see me goe forth in the morning , and bring nothing home with me at noone : Shee lost all patience , and was ready to runne out of her wits , when the world did not goe as shee would haue it . But now ( ay me , poore wretch that I am ) when shee saw that all the oyle was spent , that should maintaine the weke , and that also quite burnt out ; and when shee found , that we had not where-withall to eat , nor knew where to get meat to put into our mouthes , and that we were faine to sell our houshold-stuffe to buy vs bread ; from hence grew all this mischiefe , here shee lost her footing , and with it her patience ; insomuch , that shee could not afford mee a good looke ; and ( which is worse ) did euer after hate mee , as if I had beene her mortall enemie . Neither my faire words , nor her fathers admonitions , nor the intreatie of her kins-folke , nor the perswasions of her friends and acquaintance , could winne her to receiue me into her former fauour , or to recouer her lost affection . Shee fled from peace , because shee found it in discord ; shee loued vnquietnesse , because it was her contentment ; shee would be reuenged of mee , by retyring and separating her-selfe from me , both at bed and at bord ; and would refuse many times to eat her meat , for that shee knew how well I wisht her , and that it was a death vnto me , to see her so to doe . I knew not what to doe with my selfe , nor how to gouerne my passions , by reason of the great difficultie that I found to giue her content , which consisted onely in feeding her with the fulnesse of money , which ( God hee knowes ) I extreamely wanted . Truly it seemeth vnto mee , that there are some women , that only marry for to satisfie their owne foolish longing , and to make tryall , what a kinde of thing mariage is , it seeming vnto them , to be like vnto an hyred house ; if they finde them-selues well in it , it is well ; if ill , and that it be not to their minde , and fitted as they would haue it , all is nothing , nor will they want one excuse or other , and two false witnesses to worke a diuorce . And besides other so many inconueniences , if it so fall out , that a mans wife being any thing faire and beautifull , and that some one or other happen to fall in loue with her ; but here I will be silent , & say no more . I could wish , that the Aduocates , Notaries , and Iudges or such Courts , would open their eyes , and consider well with them-selues , that that which they doe therein , is no other thing , then to dissolue a matrimonie , and to open a doore to the Deuill , that he may enter in , first to the losse of the wifes life , secondly to the husbands honor , and lastly , to both their vndoings . And I dare assure them , in the name of that all-powerfull and mighty God of heauen & earth , that a most grieuous punishment shall be powred downe vpon them from aboue , which shall pay them home , and make the smart thereof intolerable . I would haue them therefore to know , that these are secret sins , and that the plagues that shall come vpon them , shall be also secret . Nor because the husband hath slasht his wife ouer the face , & giuen her a whores marke , or hath beaten her ( like a slaue ) with a cudgell , let these men thinke , that this sin shall escape without punishment , for the chastisement is then inflicted vpon them , when another taketh away his wife from him , God so permitting it . When he shall see his house full of dissention , infamie , & sicknesses , let him lay it to his soule & conscience , that these come for this cause . I speake not to one , but to all ; let them put their hand in their bosome , and take them-selues by the sleeue , as well those that are the occasioners , as they that are the fauourers thereof , for they all saile in one and the same ship ; and the fault is alike in both ; and therefore are to looke for the like punishment . Doest thou not see , how ( on the wedding day ) all things go trim and tricksie , what a troope attends vs at our heeles , what a deale of kinde care & paines euery man takes from the bridegroome to the guests , how contented they are , and how well pleased with their entertainment , the tables couered with neat and pure linnen , the boords furnished with dainty fare , the bed f f The Spanish phrase is ; la cama hecha de lana nueva . The bed was made of new wooll , or had new wooll put into it . For in Spaine , in regard of their heats , they haue no feather beds . handsomly made vp , the sheets fine & sweet , & all the rest of the furniture answerable thereunto ; all then was delicate , & delightfull vnto vs . And thus it lasted with vs for a while : But now that my moneys are gone , that our gallantry begins to goe downe , and that things go not so well with vs as they were wont to do , the teat with-drawes its milke , and the loue of many yeeres ( as if it were a mortall sin ) is lost in a moment . It is like to succeed with them , as it did with me , who was quite vndone , not out of any insufficiencie in my selfe , or want of care , and paines-taking , for I had wit enough , and knew how to manage my affaires with good iudgement . But I miscarried for the reasons I told you but a litle before . This was Gods handy-work , his chastisement was vpon me . For , as he is infinite , so hath he no circumscription , his power is not bounded , his arme not limited to punish this man for this , and that other for that . In some things he pronounceth a set & determinate sentence , & for such a particular sin , such a penalty appointed , besides others , which appertaine vnto the soule , as also those that arise out of such & such circumstances . Mine was ill gotten gaine , & therfore could not thriue with me . Malè parta , malè dilabuntur : Ill got , ill spent . Now when a woman is married to a man , and afterwards findes her-selfe deceiued , for that her husband proues not so rich , as he was reported to be , those goods that he hath , being other mens , and taken vp vpon credit ; & likewise , that when he was to be married , he ran farther in debt , for the apparelling & setting forth of his wife , and that within a few dayes after , the Mercer comes to demand his money for the silks he had of him , & the Taylor for the making vp of the cloathes , and that the Sargeants be on the backe of him both for the one , and the other , there is not any thing wherewith to pay them ; & if there be , yet meat is more necessarie , then the payment of debts . For whosoeuer goes without , the belly must be serued ; though we could cozen all the world besides , the belly will not be cozened . He will daily importune vs , & we must daily satisfie him . It is a debt of nature , that must needs be paid : It admits no forbearance : it is a commandement without controlment ; it is a rule without exception . When it comes to this , the peacock hangs downe his taile , as soone as he lookes vpon his feet . The pride of his starrie traine begins to flag , and his hoarse trumpet shrikes out his pitifull complaints . The flowers then begin to wither ; their pleasant spring is past ; contentment & patience betake them to their heeles . They presently set a sowre face on the matter , like him that hath tasted sharp vinegar . And if you shall aske them then , what they haue , how they doe , how their husbands vse them , how like of mariage ? In stead of an answer , Prouerbe . you shall haue them stop their noses ; it is g g Quartidiano es , ya hiede . fish of foure dayes old ; it is too stale , and begins to stinke . They will not endure the mouing of this stone ; and will Prouerbe . therefore tell you by some scuruy silent gesture or other : Speake no more of him ʰ No alçen la piedra . for Gods sake , let the man alone , doe not stir the turd , that stinks too much already ; let vs talke of some other subiect . But how can thy Lazarus ( deare wife ) being dead in his sins , otherwise chuse , but stinke , and lament his hard misfortune , being buried in the graue of thy miseries , from whence I shall neuer be raised vp againe to life ? Doth he not lye intombed in the darke and strong sepulchre of thy vaine thoughts ? and in that hollow vault of thy noysome clamours , and pestilent importunities ? Is he not shrowded in the winding sheet of thy loue , tyed to thy contents ? Which he striues all that he can , to giue thee , be it by hooke , or by crooke , with the expence of his purse , or the hazard of his person , hauing my hands bound , showing that I submit my selfe as humbly to thy subiection , as thou ( good wife , wert thou good ) should submit thy selfe to mine ? He that hath charge of a wife , and familie , let him hold his tongue , he cannot be at leysure to talke , he hath something else to doe , he must employ him-selfe in making prouision to supply necessarie wants , and perhaps is in want through thee , and is come to all this misery by thy meanes . Doe not thou then complaine that he stinks , seeing that he is putrified with thy impertinencies , finding him-selfe thrust in amongst the wormes of thy wastefull ryots and excesses , which like so many deuourers , lye gnawing vpon his heart and bowels ? Thy boldnes in going abroad ; thy liberty in conuersing ; thy exorbitancies in spending ; thy wastefulnesse in scattering ; thy vanitie , in vaunting thy selfe , bragging and boasting thy birth & parentage , which hath so many mixtures , as there are differences of keyes , and variety of stops , in an Organ . Hast thou a husband that can beare with all these , and much more ; and yet is he fish of foure dayes old ? growes he stale with thee , and begins he now to stinke ? Tell me ( I prithee ) by the life and light ( I coniure thee ) of those thy faire eyes , and doe not lye vnto me ; whether yesterday thou didst not visit such a Hermitage , such a Chappel , & such & such other places of deuotion , making there thy vowes , & thy offerings ; but to what purpose , God he best knowes ? And is it not likewise true , that since thou hadst the vse of reason ( nay rather before thou hadst it , because thou yet wantest it ) there was neuer yet any Midsommer night , or feast of S. Iohn , wherein , without sleeping ( for they say , that sleep hindereth the vertue and operation of those , you know what I meane ) thou betookst thy selfe to such a prayer , thou knowst well enough what one , but better it had beene for thee , that thou hadst not knowne it ( being such a one as it is , and so much reproued ) & without opening thy mouth , or speaking so much as one word ( for they likewise say , that silence is another essentiall point of that prayer ) thou shouldst stay waiting and looking for the first that should passe along by thee after midnight , to the end , that by what thou shouldst heare come from him , thou mightst accordingly iudge of thy future mariage , & know him that should be thy husband , hauing therein a strong confidence & affiance , and giuing the same credit & beleefe vnto it , as if it were an article of Faith , or one of those of thy Creed , when as in very deed , they are no other then old wiues tales , the impostures of witches , & the meere fooleries of foolish women , & such as want iudgment . And is it not also true , that there is not that Beata , nor that deuout & religious woman , that thou hast not either beene with her , or shee with thee , to the same effect ?

Is it not true , that thou hast put on thy mantle , walking diuers stations with them , only for this purpose ? Hast thou not forcibly laid hold on their garments , & torne the mantles of these Saints , who neuer throw them off from their shoulders , burning tapers , to thou knowst whom ? Hast thou not broken the bounds of modesty without blushing , neither setting before thee thine owne shame , or the feare of God ? Hast thou left any sieue , without trying thy sorceries thereupon ? or beanes lye still in their place , which thou hast not made to leape and dance , by euill meanes , and by words , and charmes , hated & prohibited by our holy Religion ? Is there any match-maker , or knowne friend of thine , whom thou hast not been importunate withall , telling them that thou art sicke , & that thou longest for a husband ? At last , God sends her a husband ( I speake of others , not of my selfe ) a quiet man , milde spirited , one that is carefull to liue , & an honest man , who takes paines , and labours hard to get a Royall wherewith to feed and maintaine her , not suffering her to want her oyntments , her paintings , and a thousand other toyes & trinkets , as brooches , flowres , buttons , aglets , & the like , for the ornament of her person ; & yet for all this , within foure dayes , this man also growes stale , and stinkes . If ( poore soule ) he doe all that hee can for thee , why doest thou afflict both him and thy selfe , and why should it turne thy stomacke , and cause a loathing in thee , when others shall but name him vnto thee ? Why dost thou seeke to defame him , by thy obloquies , detractions , deprauings , reproaches , raylings , and reuilings ? Why dost thou grumble at those good offices he does thee ? Why misconstrue his kindnesse ? Why fashion his affection according to thy false fancy , measuring his heart by thine owne ? Thou wouldst not haue him digg'd out of his graue , but that the memory of him should sleep for euer , and yet thou digg'st him vp with thine owne hands , not sparing the very bones of his Ancestors , and harmelesse ashes of his whole linage , throwing out lies and scandals by shouell-fuls to those that giue thee the hearing , laying foule ( but false ) imputations vpon him , proclaiming that ( as they say ) in the open market-place of him , which neither doest thou know to bee true , neither indeed is he guilty of . To what end then is all this outrage ? I will tell thee ; It is onely out of her malice towards him , thinking by this meanes to affront and disgrace him . But thou doest therein , like thy selfe , thou showest thy selfe a right woman ; full of change and mutability , fickle and inconstant ; and would to God , these thy sodaine , and vndeserued alterations , doe not arise ( taking the course that thou dost ) from the offences , that thou hast committed against thy husband , against thy God , and against thine owne soule .

Now that I am come hither , and brought thus , before euer I thought of it , into this port , I will vnpacke my commodities , set vp a boothe , and make show of all my wares , as your Pedlers and poore Mercers vse to doe , that goe from Faire to Faire , and from Towne to Towne , opening them here to day , and there to morrow , without making any set residence , in this or that other place , and when they haue sold all their trinkets , returne home to their owne countrie . Let vs here set open our shop , and sell you some of these our good wares , and let vs in open market make show vnto you of the intentions of some kind of mariages ; as well , that we may put those out of their errour , who are led thereunto for those ends ; as also for that they may know , that they are knowne ; and it is fit , that we should tell them the ill that they doe , because they truly doe ill ; and that done , we will presently returne home againe to our selues .

Some take this holy state of mariage vpon them , out of no other consideration in the world , then to free them-selues from the subiection of a Father or a Concerning mariage , and seuerall ends leading thereunto . mother , and to be at their owne liberty , it seemeth to your foolish young girle , ( be she Gentlewoman , or otherwise ) that she shall presently be a free-woman ; and that as soone as shee is remoued from her fathers house , and receiued into that of her husbands , she may gad and runne , where , and whither she list . That she shall haue the Law in her owne hands ; that she shall command with authorite , haue where-withall to giue , and seruants to waite and attend vpon her , and to be at her becke . To these kind of creatures , subiection seemes to be too sharpe and cruell a tye vpon them ; and therefore easily suppose , that as soone as they are married , they shall on the sodaine , be absolute in their Empire , powerfull in their will , and sway all things as they list them-selues . They will not sticke to frame this argument to them-selues ; that their parents persecute them , that they are their daily torment , neuer suffring them to bee at quiet , and that they shall finde their husbands more soft and pliable then waxe , and that they will proue kind and louing vnto them . The growth whereof springs from this , That their fathers , in the life that they led with their wiues , liue like bruit beasts , whereby they raise vp vaine desires in their daughters , inflame their appetites , and cause them ( by their ill example ) to runne a crosse course ; for , being ( as they are ) imprudent , they cannot distinguish of things aright ; they embrace all , that is sweet and pleasant , thinking to meet with it , wheresoeuer they come , not thinking that there is any tartnesse or sowernesse in any , saue onely in their parents .

These , and other the like idle conceits , disquiet their minds , making them not to care which end goes forward , it puts them besides their wits , and leaues them without any iudgement . But as they looke and gaze vpon this , why doe they not also with a fixed and setled eye , behold that other friend and acquaintance of theirs , who is married to a iealous foole , a rough and bitter husband , who not onely giues her not a good word , but will not suffer her to step a foot out of doores , to take the ayre , and recreate her selfe , no not so much as to goe to Masse , vnlesse it be very early in the morning , and that in a cloath kirtle , and muffled vp in a poore mantle , as if she were one of the seruants of his house : And in a word , not vsing her as his wife , but as his slaue that had fled , and run away from him . It is not so well ( my masters ) as you take it to be ; and beleeue me , that good mariages are not chickens of euery dayes hatching ; they happen good now and then by chance , or as it pleaseth God to send them ; and it befalleth those that are married , as it fareth with him , that buyes a Melon , for one dainty and delicate one indeed , which he may chance to light vpon , hee shall meet with a hundred other , which proue gourds and pompeons in their tast and relish ? Hast thou not obserued that other familiar friend of thine , who hath married a gamester , who playes away all , to the very sheets wherein hee lyes , turning them into table-cloathes , at a common dicing house ? Dost thou not thinke vpon that other neighbour of thine , whose husband keepes a whore vnder her nose , and neuer a morning throughout the yeare , but that he sends her out of the market a good basket full of prouision , whilst his poore wife is ready to famish at home for hunger . Nor haue they heard ( as it should seeme ) of some husbands , who are no sooner entred within the doores of their owne house , but that they leuell their eyes with their feet , and neuer lift them vp , vnlesse it bee to chide , and finde fault without a cause , and to feed this their pee●…ish and froward humour ? Doe these women happly thinke , that all wiues are as much respected and beloued of their husbands , as they are of their fathers ? I can assure you , that a bad father is to be preferred before a good husband ; I haue seldome seene a father that hath not still show'd him-selfe a father ; but few husbands so kinde , that they haue still continued kind . And if any such , hath at any time beene , that hath not beene wanting to those obligations and duties , which belong vnto wedlocke , it may well be taken for a wonder . But I neuer knew a father cease to be a father , though his sonne ceased to be a sonne . There is many a good father , that will make much of a bad sonne ; but seldome shall you see a bad hu●…band make much of a good wife .

Others doe marry , bec●…use ( hauing neither father nor mother aliue ) they A second end . desire to be out of their Tutors or Guardians hands ; thinking that by them they are sold and rob'd of that they haue . They cast vp their reckoning , and say with them-selues , that a husband would manage their estate farre better , and looke a great deale more faithfully vnto it , then a Guardian , who being loth to be dispossessed thereof , and to render that vp into her hands , which is her owne , takes no great care to preferre her , but does all that he can to keepe her from marrying , hoping that to morrow she will fall sicke , and die ; and himselfe ha●…e all .

And therefore , they say ; How better were it , that mine owne children should enioy that which I haue , then to leaue it to my enemies , who wish my death , that they may inherit my goods . I will marry , that I will , I will to this geare , though it be with some foule filthy Negro , for my father did not take the paines to get that he did for my Guardian , nor was it his meaning , that he should licke him-selfe hole by me , cutting him-selfe large thongs , out of another bodies leather , especially vsing me so vntowardly as he doth , suffering me to goe all to ragged , and torne , halfe starued for want of good meat , and not to much as one poo●…e Royall in my purse to buy me a few pinnes . This is that that makes them runne headlong downe the hill ; and therefore taking counsaile of the first they meet with ; they thinke , that this their friend hath aduised them well , and that what they tell them , is out of loue , and a well wishing to their good : and being led thus along in this blind-fold manner , they pitch vpon a dunghill , where they are so bemired , that they shall neuer come off cleane from thence , while they liue , because they made choice of such a young gallant , that wastes all vpon his backe , and his belly , in good cloathes , and good meat ; whose maine care is to pamper his body , keepe his horses fat , bestow rich liueries on his seruants , spend in feasts and banquets , leauing his wife weeping at home in a corner ; and that which shee purposed , and desired to leaue to her children , to wit , the wealth that she brought with her , hauing now a housefull of little brats , shee hath not one single peny to giue , or leaue vnto them ; for hauing matcht with an vnthrift , the winde hath blowne it all away . And if she were afraid before , that her kinsmen , for to make them-selues masters of her estate , did desire her death ; sure her husband now wisheth it no lesse , for out of a humor of his that he hath , to shift cleane linnen , being now growne weary of so much wife , which neuer misses him at bed , and at boord , hee desireth , and peraduenture also procureth , to put her vnder ground ; and so this poore soule , deceiued by her selfe and others , fayles in the obtaining of that , which her false imagination proposed vnto her .

Others , of a lesse staied temper , a kind of giddy-headed Hobby-horses , will The third end . needs marry forsooth for pure loue ; these show them-selues in Churches , and at publike meetings ; when they are at home at their owne houses , their windowes stand wide open , that they may see , and be seene ; and in the night they lye tumbling and tossing in their beds , looking still when some one gallant or other should come vnder their Balcone , who with the Trin-Trin of his gh●…terne , should rouze them vp from their vnquiet rest .

This or that other young wench , heares him sing certaine coplas or verses , which Gerineldos made to Donna Urraca , and thinkes that they were purposely made for her . She is more blacke then the Crow , more foule then the Tortoise , more foolish then the Salamander , more vgly then the Rat ; and because there they paint her forth , to be more faire then Venus , not leauing any boxe , or cabinet vnsearcht , from which they take not forth for her , Alabaster , Rubies , Turkeses , Pearles , Snow , Iesmines , and Roses , euen to the vnnailing from heauen , of the Sunne , and the Moone , setting her forth with Starres , and comparing her eye-browes , to the Rainebow , that beautifull Arche of heauen , they are taken as truly there-with , as if they did properly belong vnto them , applauding them-selues with these their vndeserued prayses : Being as an euen so , or rather farre otherwise .

Alas poore silly foole , get thee gone , and sooth not vp thy selfe with these glorious ( but feigned ) glosses ; for he ( I assure thee ) that made them , did not so much as once dreame on thee ; he made them not for thee ; or if hee did , hee lyde , that hee might deceiue and abuse thee with his flattering of thee ; knowing thee to be vainly giuen , and a louer thereof . Take heed , I aduise thee of such a glozing companion ; for he is a meere Emperique , who with one kinde of sirrop cures all sorts of persons , and diseases . He sayes the very same vnto others , as he does vnto thee . He readeth vnto thee ( to stirre vp thy desires ) another Lecture , taken out of Diana , where he tels thee that he saw the burning flames of those faire Shephardesses , the Palace of that wise Dame , with all the riches & sumptuousnesse thereof , the pearles and pretious stones wherewith it was adorned , those delicate gardens , and pleasant groues , wherein they tooke their pleasures and delights , and the dainty musicke which they had made vnto them ; and as if all this had beene true , or might haue beene , and that the same things might one day happen to them-selues , these poore fooles beginne to melt , and pine away for loue .

These wenches are like tindar , any the least sparke that lights vpon them , sets them all on a light fire ; they are quickly tinded , and quickly ended , no sooner in , then out ; they make a blaze , and dye .

There are some others , that are a little more curious , who refusing to make them-selues ready , and to buy other things more necessarie for them , spend their money in hyring of bookes ; and because they haue read in Don Belianis , in Amadis , or in Esplandian , or Knight of the Sunne , those dangers , and ill voyages , whereon those vnfortunate Knights went for the Infanta Magalona , which should be ( as it seemed ) some well disposed Dame , they suppose , that the horse is ready sadled at their doore , and that there is the dwarfe , and that good old wench with Sennor Agrajes , to goe and direct them in the way , and to bring them through those thick forrests and woods , to the end that they might not touch vpon the inchaunted Castle ; whence they goe to performe some other atchieuement . And a head-lesse Lyon , encountring with them , as they were on the way , vsing many courtesies and ceremonies vnto them , with a great deale of willingnesse , brings them , where they are serued , and royally entertayned with diuers daintily drest dishes of meat , which to their thinking , they now feed vpon , and that they finde them-selues afterwards there sleeping in delicate soft beds of downe , not knowing who brought them thither , nor whence they come , for all is inchantment . There they are honestly lodged , and well vsed , till Don Galaor comes thither , and kills the Gyant , who makes me to shed teares , as oft as I heare tell of the cruelties that he vsed towards them . Whereas it had beene much better , that by one of these Gentle-women , he had beene sent into Castile , together with his oppressed prisoners , where onely for the very sight of them , they might haue got so much money , that would haue made vp a sufficient Dowry for to marry them , without running so many aduentures , and disaduentures . And so this inchantment is now wholly come to an end . But let them take heed , who reade such , and the like bookes , lest that succeed vnto them , which happened vnto Don Quixote de la Mancha , who thinking him-selfe an errant Knight , came to be an arrant Asse . But there is not wanting such another mad rogue as my selfe , who told me the other day , That if such bookes as these should , like a bundle of fagots , be pitcht round about these faire curious creatures , and that fire should bee put vnto them , yet were it impossible to make them to burne , because their vertues would extinguish those flames . But I say nothing ; and so I protest , because my selfe goes wandring through the world , I know not whither : and if I should say this of others , they would say the like of mee .

Other wenches there are , who vpon the first sight of some spruce yonker , A fourth . with a starcht beard , and his whiskers turn'd vp , his bodie peraduenture being as full of gummes , as a Valençia veluet , and as many issues in his armes and leggs , as Araniuez hath fountaines , yet conceiting him to be another Adonis for his handsomnesse and his neatnesse , are taken with the pretinesse of his person , and apparell , and are ready forsooth to runne mad for loue . This dandling , fidling , tender , and wanton young fellow , made of purpose ( as they thinke ) for pleasure and delight , who makes a profession of neatnesse , and other apish toyes , as conging and kissing his hand , a poppet that one may put in his pocket , is the onely man with them : as if these curiosities , were not the Vespers of some bone-fire , wherein they are to be burned . Let a woman be like a woman ; and a man like a man . Though these vanities , and idle superf●…uities befi●… neither the one , nor the other , but serue onely as Liueries , to show that they are the Deuils followers . But if you will allow fore-tops , curlings of the hayre , lyes , paintings , neat dressings , a soft skinne , and a thousand other things to beautifie both face and body , let-women haue onely this priuiledge , who haue need thereof , and know best how to make vse of these niceties . It shall suffice man that he expresse him-selfe to be a man : it will well become him , to haue a bigge voice , a hard and bushy hayre , a thicke skinne , a manly face , a graue carriage , and a hand that is none of the tenderest . Yet these foolish wenches , thinke that such spruce princoxes as these , are made of such pure mettall , that they haue not any naturall passions , nor that they spit and cough as other men ; and yet for all this their seeming finenesse , they are subiect to Sarsaparrilla , China earth , Guacum , Emplastrum Melilotum , Unguentum Apostolorum , decoctions , sirrops , and electuaries , and many other miseries , and medicines ; for whom these fond things are ready to run mad , and are so hot in their loue , that if the bridle of shame did not somewhat restraine this their head-strong affection , they would be worse then any deuill , when he is vnchained and let loose . And if you shall aske , either all , or any one of them , what they see in this finicall fellow , what reason they haue to dote vpon him , why conceit him to be such a pretious peece ? This accursed answer ( as it is common with them ) so it serues then in stead of all other : That it is their pleasure forsooth to haue it so ; it is their humour , and they will not be beaten out of it . And if you lay before them their vnaduisednesse in doing so , the inconueniences that are likely to follow thereupon , the ill counsaile which they take , and the like , their answer is ; I must suffer for it , and no body for me ; it is I , and not you , that must feele the smart of it : and therefore you were as good hold your peace . If it succeed ill with me , I must be contented with my bad fortune , and conne no body thanke but my selfe , and therefore I pray let me alone , and spare your labour to speake thereof any more , for I am of age , and know well enough what I doe . And yet this miserable maid , neither knowes what she does , or sayes ▪ but if they find them-selues obliged by the sweet-meates , that are sent vnto them , a gawdy girdle , a neat payre of Twizes , a silke payre of stockings , garters fringed with gold , perfum'd gloues , or a loue-letter brought her by her mayd , or her answer thereunto , if she suffer him to pinch her as she passeth by , or reach forth her hand to him from vnder the doore , if not perhaps her foot : when it comes to this , Lord haue mercy vpon her , there is no other medicine for this malady . For she is already toucht h h Tocada esta de la yerua . A fifth . with the venome of that herbe , Prouerbe . whose infection ( without diuine helpe ) is incurable .

There are other women , that doe likewise marry , onely that they may liue as merrily as the day is long , that they may goe whither it pleaseth them , as well to see , as to be seene ; that they may dresse them-selues to their owne liking , weare this gowne , or put on this mantle , either as it sutes with their fancy , or the fashion : it seeming vnto them , that because they saw such a one vpon such a festiuall day , or all the weeke long , in her brauery and her gallantry , that as soone as she is married , her husband will maintaine her in the same manner , and if not better , yet at least as other husbands keepe their wiues : and if such a mans wife trot vp and downe all the day long , hee will not deny her leaue to walke the streets at her pleasure .

Hence ariseth the quarrell , this is it which maketh the fray ; for if her hopes be crost , and that things fall not out according to her expectation , or that her husband doth not like of it , and that he will not haue his wife to goe either cloathed , or naked , for any but him-selfe ; telling her , that though such a one let his wife doe what she list , and to goe thus and thus , he does not well in it , giuing the world occasion to scandall her good name , whereby he must needs be toucht in his honor ; and therefore he will not permit her so to doe , for feare of incurring the like censure . Whereupon , and for no other cause in the world , because they will not giue them leaue to weare what cloathes they list themselues , what shooes , and what stockings , nor to take their pleasure abroad , and to walke the streets , as some other women doe , nor bee left wholly to their owne liberty , not one stone shall rest quiet vpon another in all the whole house ; she plotteth treasons wherewith to reuenge her selfe vpon her vnfortunate husband , who being a wise and considerate man , knowing what a kind of woman shee is , and how affected in her disposition , is afraid , that if he should grant her this licence , and giue her wings , they would turne to her destruction , as they doe to the i i There are diuers sorts of Ants , whereof some are borne with wings , but to their owne b●…rt . Covarr . verb. Ho●…ga . Ante. So that he dares not giue her leaue to range abroad , nor to consent to other her extrauagancies . This only coale is enough to kindle the fire , this single contradiction will serue the turne to make her fall a scratching of her face , and tearing her hayre , calling her selfe the most wretched and vnfortunate of all women , and wishes that as soone as shee was borne , it had pleased God , that her mother had strangled her , buried her in a ditch , or throwne her into some deepe well , rather then to liue to be subiect to so tyrannicall a power ; that she onely of all other married women , is the most miserable ; that such a woman is of this and that quality , and that shee liues like a Queene with her husband , in comparison of her ; that she is no whit inferiour vnto her , nor brought a lesser dowry with her , nor would shee euer haue married , if she had thought her husband would haue vs'd her no better . And breaking the bounds of womanhood , she dishonours him , calling him base fellow , dung hill-squire , neglectfull villaine , rogue , rascall , and what not ; vpbraiding him , that her father kept better men then hee was ; and that hee was not worthy to make cleane her old shooes . And if her husband chance to ouer-heare her , she straines her voice a note higher , crying out , Wretched woman that I am , was I so daintily bred vp , to be fed with this course fare ? Are these the delights I am like to haue ? Did they leaue me so well for this , that tho●… shouldst vse me in this scuruy manner as thou doest ? Must I bee thy slaue night and day , to looke to thy house and children , and to bee made a drudge to thy seruants ? See , and there be any griefe like vnto mine ? God and the world knowes what I am , of what house I come , and how well I am descended ! Don Fulano , and Don Cutano , such a Bishop , such a Conde , and such a Duke , are of my alliance ; leauing out neither beardling , nor shaueling , high , nor low , whereof she does not make a Letany , and verball processe .

But poore vnhappy man as he is , if it should fortune so to happen , ( which God forbid should euer befall any honest man ) that he haue his aged mother at home with him in his house , his sisters that are virgins , or children by another wife ; then will she keepe a racket , and cry out ; That it was for them , that her father got his wealth ; that it is spent vpon them ; that they eate it out , whilest I ( poore soule ) who brought him all this , must bee vsed like a Negra ; Negra ( said I ) if it were Gods will , would I were no worse vs'd then such a ones Negra , which passeth here daily by our doore , as if she were some great Lady ; to day in this change of cloathes , to morrow in that . I onely am that vnlucky bird , that continue still in these old ragges , euer since I was first married , and haue not where-withall to mend them , mew'd vp betweene these wals , accompanied with I know not how many spindles , reeles , distaffes , and hitchels for flaxe : What can her husband ( poore man ) say to all this ? What answer can he make her ? His best course will bee to let her alone , otherwise hee shall neuer bring his purpose to passe .

There are another sort of women , that marry , to the end that by hauing The sixt . a husband to cloake their faults , they may not be molested by the Iustice , nor reproached by their neighbours , or any other persons whatsoeuer . This is roguery , knauery , villanie , beastlinesse , and dishonesty in the highest degree . What should a man say more of them ? They are a kinde of kinde wen●…es , but dishonest and shamelesse . They are like those Gardiners , that clap vp a skar-crow in a fig-tree , that the birds may not come and pecke at the figges : which are onely kept for those , whom it shall please the Gardiner to giue leaue to plucke them ; or such as shall pay him well for them : so as the birds doe not pecke them , it is all good and well .

Is there none then , that may correct , reproue , or open his mouth against these kinde of women ? No surely . They haue a skar-crow in the fig-tree ; a husband of their owne in the house . Touch them who dares . They can eyther giue or sell , their honour , or their persons , as they will and list themselues , euen in the sight of the whole world , and yet by-reason of this their skar-crow , the Iustice dare not offer to punish them . For it fareth with them , as it doth with Vine-yards , which haue a guard vpon them in their time of fruitage ; but when the Vintage shall be gathered in , and the grapes carryed away , and put into the wine-presse , they are no more looked vnto , but are laid open , and made a common field , for their flockes and heards of cattell to feede on , treading and trampling them downe with their feet .

Sister , let me tell thee , that these are the steps that leade vnto hell : God will take away this cloake from thee , this husband of thine for thy dissolute life and shamelesse lust , to the end , that this may be the w●…ip to lash thee , by bringing thy secret whorings in publike view : and in that balance wherein thou didst put his honor , thine owne ere long shall be weighed . But I were best take heed to whom I speake , lest I may chance to haue my head broken for my labour . She feared not her husband , she was past all shame towards God and Man : and shall I thinke to reclaime her , or such as shee is , by these my fooleries ? ( for I know they take them for no other , ) I shall neuer be able to doe it while I liue , and therefore I will let them alone .

Other some also marry , for that they see their wealth beginnes to waste , they The seuenth . know not how themselues : yet pretend , that the onely cause why they marry , is , for that they are young , and are loth to haue their honour lyable to the lauish tongues of euill disposed people ; as also , lest their persons might run the hazard of Rapes , and other the like violences . Well , of two euils the least : But because God hath not any part in all these mariages , and that it may be better said of them , that they be the Deuils contracts : and for that all things are to be reputed eyther good or ill , according to the end whereunto they are directed : and this being knowne , those actions are determined and defined that leade thereunto ; bearing more loue alwayes to the end it selfe , then to those things which conduce and guide vs vnto it . So that mariage is not loued in such as these , for the loue that they beare vnto mariage , but onely vse it as a meanes , for the accomplishing of their desires . And these kinde of women doe not walke directly in the right way , but goe somewhat about to serue their owne turnes , running a by-way to their owne ruine . And therefore I hold it no good mariage , ( nor indeed is it ) when it hath any other end in it , saue only to serue God in that holy and honourable estate .

God doth permit ( I confesse ) all these mariages , but I must tell you withall , that in most of them the deuill hath a share , and that not the least . It is a good and holy Calling , but thou makest it a hellish Mariage . It was instituted for quietnesse and for comfort , but thou lou'st it not ; thou neyther hast it , nor art willing to haue it : but thou dost rather intangle thy feet in it , that thou maist the sooner trip , and fall with it to the ground . Let not a virgin , or a widow , make the butt that she shoots at her lawlesse liberty , nor the freeing of her-selfe from her Fathers , or her Gardians subiection : let her not be led along with vaine loue , let her cast away from her all such filthinesse as followes her sensuall appetite . Which if they doe not doe , let them assure them-selues , that it will goe ill both with the one and the other : and if their husbands shall not proue so good and kinde vnto them , as they them-selues did thinke , and wish they should , if they shall make slaues of them after they are ma●…yed vnto them ; if they shall me we them vp like Hawkes ; if they shall lead an euill life with them ; if they shall waste away their wealth , and yet leaue a great charge of children vpon them ; if their purse shall be still empty ; if troubles shall come vpon them ; if their husband shall be a Gamester , or a whore-master ; if they shall be thus abused by them , and shall haply dye vnder their hands : all this ariseth from those euill ends , which they proposed to themselues , eyther by seeking to aduance themselues beyond their qualitie , or to flaunt it beyond their meanes : or those other fore-mentioned reasons , which are the sole cause of their ruine . This Idoll of Baal , whom they adored , in him did they put their trust : this was the God who ( they thought ) could succour , free and defend them ; but in case at any time they should haue true need indeed of his helpe , they shall find , that he ought not to be feared , nor that he is able to send downe fire to consume their enemies , or comfort them ; for as he hath it not , so can he not giue it them . Thou adorest Idols , but thou shalt be deliuered by none of them in the day of trouble : for in a word , they are Idols , the workmanship of our owne hands , fashioned out of wantonnesse , and a longing to be doing of something , and adored onely out of an idle humour , and out of a kinde of pleasure and delight that wee take in these toyes . Fire shall come downe from heauen , and consume the sacrifice , the wood , the stones , and the ashes , euen to the waters themselues in the trenches , ( like vnto that of Elias ) though they be filled afresh , barrell after barrell , yet shall all that moysture be licked vp by the fire . Know yee then , that those are mariages which God ordaineth , and such as you enter into , onely to shew your selues obedient to his will , and haue consulted therewith afore-hand ; leauing it wholly to him , to worke in the rest , as he shall thinke fittest for his seruice , without seeking after any ill and foule meanes : and then though yee should be dung-wet , and bucketted a hundred times with the waters of persecutions , of hunger , of cold , of imprisonment , and all other troubles and miseries , that may befall the life of man , it is no matter : For fire shall come downe from heauen , that is to say , the loue of God and his charitie , which shall consume and dry vp , these their many waters of tribulations . This quicke fire makes speedy riddance of all our troubles , presenting them as a sacrifice before his diuine Maiestie , who will not onely assist vs with his grace in this world , but crowne vs with his glory in the world to come . And let this serue as an end to this my Sermon . Now let vs returne againe to our Mariage , which ( and it had pleas'd God ) would it had neuer beene .

I had now seru'd some six yeares in the Mariage-galley ; in which short time ( would it had beene lesse ) I endured ( I thanke my wife for it ) a great deale of misery . Howbeit , for the foure first yeares , our wedding loaues ( I must confesse ) were fresh and new : for as yet , it was but hony-moone with vs ; all was of the finest flowre and the purest wheat . But when wee beganne to goe downe the hill , and were now fallen halfe in halfe from that height wherein wee were before , and wanted money to maintaine vs at that scantling : when the cloth-of-gold kirtle , which was richly both bordred and imbroydered , was to be sold , and turn'd into gold ; and that not any the least thread of it , though no bigger then a Spiders , escap't the melting-pot , and yet past for a reasonable handsome kirtle still , as the world went with vs : when all our old ends were spent and gone ; when I could not inch it out any further ; when I saw that the water was come vp aboue my chinne , and that I could not long hold out , but must needes sinke , for that she would by no meanes consent , that I should sell any thing eyther of hers , or mine owne , and that my credit to furnish my shop would not reach so farre as one farthing-worth of Radishes , I found my selfe then in that strait , that aduising with my father-in-law , I was willing to take some-what a more rigerous course with her . God send vs a good night of it . She thereupon began to set out so loud a throat , as if ( like a pig ) I had offered to sticke her , or that the matter had beene of more moment then indeed it was : insomuch that the neighbours came running in for to helpe her , who were so many that the house could not hold them . But when they saw the truth of the businesse , as God would haue it , it was a thing of nothing ; and when they perceiued I had reason to doe as I did , they rested quiet , and went their wayes : yet for all this did not shee leaue off her lamentations , which might very well haue seru'd her turne for a hundred holy-weekes . I was inforced that I might not fall further foule with her , to let her alone , and to leaue her to her self , that I might not be bound by hearing her , to answer her both with words and deeds . I tooke my cloake , threw it on my shoulder , and got mee out adoores , leauing her all alone , and giuing her thereby free liberty to say and doe what she would , till she should grow weary , and could no more .

This madded her more then all the rest , when she saw mee set so light by that which she said , and that I seemed to make such little reckning of it . And I may truly confesse vnto you , that in all that time that I liued with her , I cannot accuse my selfe , nor did she euer taxe me of any the least iniury that I had done her , but vs'd her with all the kindnesse that a husband could vse a wife . But when God shall bestow wealth vpon vs ; or when he pleaseth , take it away , this alters the case ; for man cannot then doe withall , it lyes not in his hands , neyther is it in his power , to goe increasing in riches , neyther can he stop them in their course , ( no more then a man can the tyde ) when they are ebbing from him . Hee cannot be termed an vnthrift , or a bad husband , who vseth his best endeuors , as others doe , for to get where-withall to liue in some good and honest fashion , and to prouide , as well as hee can , for his wife , children , and family . But he is a bad husband , who spends his meanes vpon women , throwes it away at play , wastes it in eating and drinking , and prodigally consumes it in pride of apparell , and other vices of like excesse .

Let my young prodigals hearken vnto mee , and doe thou to vnderstand this lesson , thou that art the onely sonne and heyre of some rich merchant : for it is vnto thee that I speake , and thou knowest why and wherefore I speake it . And I was also about to say farther vnto thee , that if thou doe not take heede , thy rash and vnaduised courses , ( holpen on by other mens ill counsell ) will carry thee hence to hell . Repent thee therefore betime , and haue a care to liue , that thou maist not dye .

So that I say , it is neyther good , nor bad successe , that should cause any separation betwixt Man and wife ; nor ought marryed folkes to fall out and disagree about the transitory things of this world . For a husband hath no more obligation , then to vse all his industry and diligence , and to doe the best hee can : The successe wee must leaue to God . Nor is hee to be condemned for a bad husband , who keepes his wifes dowry well secured , and hath rather augmented , then diminisht it , without hauing eyther sold , or paltred it away . Shee , without doubt , could not confesse so much , or if shee did confesse it , shee did not speake the truth ; or if shee did speake it , shee did adulterate it in that manner , that they might absolue her vpon it . Thus ( poore soule ) did shee deceiue her-selfe , whilest shee thought to cozen her Confessor . Likewise , there were not some wicked people wanting , of base birth , who , vpon weake grounds , and a weaker vnderstanding , to flatter and sooth vp this her idle humour , did help to further her fooleries , fauouring them all that they could , not so much as once giuing care vnto mee , nor knowing the iustnesse of my cause : And these were they that wrought my woe , and brought her to hell . For she dyed shortly after of a sharpe disease , without shewing any tokens of repentance , or Guzmans wife dyes . receiuing the Sacrament .

In two things may I style my selfe vnfortunate : First , in this my mariage , though on my part I did vse all possible meanes to obserue the lawes therof . Secondly , that hauing done penance so long a time with her , and hauing lost all my wealth , I had not any acquittance of receipt vnder her hand , no not so much as a childe by her , whereby I might haue recouered her dowry . Howbeit , I haue no great cause to complaine much for this : for the vnhappinesse of her death , made my life happy . For there is no burthen so heauy , as the insupportable waight of a froward wife . As a certaine passenger plainly gaue vs to vnderstand , A short tale of one that threw his wife ouer-boord . who being vpon a voyage at Sea , and a great storme arising , the Master of the Shippe gaue order that they should presently lighten the Shippe , and throw the heauiest commodities ouer-board for the sauing of their liues . The passenger hearing him say so , tooke his wife vp in his armes , and threw her into the sea . The Iustice going afterwards about to punish him for this his offence , he excused him-selfe , saying ; That the master of the ship , had commanded him so to doe . And that amongst all the merchandize that hee had aboord , there was not any that waighed so heauy as his wife , which was the cause that hee threw her into the Sea : And it pleased God that they had faire weather after it .

Now , turne your eyes vpon my father-in-Law , who neuer had any difference with me , but did cherish and comfort me , as if I had beene his owne naturall sonne ; and taking alwayes part with me against his daughter , and would euer chide and reprehend her ; and when he saw his fatherly admonitions could not reclaime her , nor worke any good vpon her , he would neuer come within her doores . But howsoeuer he did hate her conditions ; in conclusion , she was his daughter ; and children are those tables that are sawen and hewen as it were out of the fathers heart . And though they cause their sorrow , yet they loue them dearely . He mourned much for her , but we remained friends . Wee buried this vnhappy woman ( for that must be her name ) and did that was sitting for her soule . And within a few dayes after , we parled of parting Company ; for he would that I should returne that vnto him which he had giuen me with his daughter . I did not stand off , but gaue him all that he had giuen me , and in better case then he consigned it vnto me . He kindly thankt me ; we leuel'd our accompts , remaining still as good friends as euer we were heretofore .

CHAP. IIII.

Guzman de Alfarache , being now a Widower , resolues to goe to Alcala de Henares , to study the Artes , and Diuinity , that he might make him-selfe fit to say Masse . And hauing fulfilled all his tearmes , and duly heard his Lectures , hee leaues all and marries againe .

FOR to tumble downe a stone from the top of a hill , euery mean mans strength will serue , with the touch ( as they say ) of his little finger , hee will make it to roule to the ground . But if the same stone were to be drawne out of some deepe Well , many men would not be able to fetch it forth , and great diligence must be vsed for the getting of it vp . For to make my selfe fall from that good estate , wherein I was , and to run head-long out of my wealth and credit , my wifes wastfulnesse was enough to turne me going ; but to get my selfe vp againe , to the same height wherein I was before , I had need of the helpe of other the like Vnkles and Kinsfolke ; such another Genoa , and Milane ; or that another Sayavedra should come and liue with me ; or that the same man should rise againe ; for I neuer lighted on the like seruant , or companion for my turne ; by whose helping hand I might haue beene raised vp as high as euer I was , and restored to a better estate then before : But wanting these good helpes , I lay buryed and whelmed-ouer head and eares in a well of miseries .

Goods and riches , the slower they are in comming , the quicker they are in Riches long a comming , but quicke in going . going . They are gathered with a great deale of leasure ; but 〈◊〉 scattered away in haste . All at this present ( whatsoeuer it be ) in this world , it is all subiect to mutation ; it being fuller of alterations , then any thing else . Let not the rich man therefore rest too secure , nor yet the poore man despaire . For the wheele is as slow in comming vp , as in going downe ; and as quickly emptieth , as fils the Buckets that it bringeth vp . The excessiue expences of my house had stript me of all , both my iewels and my money ; My wife might with a good conscience ( if she had had it ) considering what I suffered for her sake , and the troubles which by her exorbitancies , lighted vpon me , haue left mee some small part of her portion , ( which she might lawfully haue done ) where-with at least I might ( had I beene so disposed ) being a sole and retired man , haue driuen some small trade , attended my old occupation of vsury , or emploied my selfe in some one thing or other , to haue pickt out a poore liuing , and to beginne the world anew , to see if I could recouer this my weaknesse , whereinto by her meanes I was fallen , and now brought so low . But not onely in this particular occasion , but in all the rest , that offered them-selues vnto mee , with my friends and acquaintance , I might say that which Simonides said ; He had two Simonides his two coffers . coffers or chests in his house , and was wont to say , ( vsing to open them at certaine times ) that when he opened that of cares and troubles , from which hee thought , and hoped to reape some profit , it fell out contrary to his expectation , finding nothing but his labour for his paines ; and of that it was brim-full ; but that wherein the Graces were kept , who should haue recompenced him for his good seruices , he could get nothing thence , but had the ill lucke to find it alwayes empty .

This Philosopher and my selfe , were equally vnfortunate ; and it seemeth , that the influence of one and the same Starre , had lighted on vs both . For albeit , I did ouermore labour to helpe and benefit others , not considering the good or hurt that might come thereof , and without taking the counsell of those , who say ; Haz bien , a a Haz bien , y guarte . Guzman hurt by his kind heart . y guarte : Doe well for others , but yet looke to thy Prouerbe . selfe ; so may I also say , That I neuer washt that head , that I had any other reward for my paines , but scabs and scurffe . And albeit I had felt the smart of it , and paid soundly for this my folly , yet I could not hold my hand , but wilfully persisted in mine owne wayes ; for , being made drunke with the delight , that I tooke therein , I did not seeke to repayre the hurt it had done mee . For as it is an easie matter to strip a b b Facil despojar à vn ebrio . drunken man out of his cloathes ; so is it hard to Prouerbe . doe the same vpon him , that is sober . They may c c Pueden roba●… , al que duerme , pero no à quien vela . rifle him that sleepes ; but not him , that is awake . I did neuer stand vpon my guard ; I did neuer thinke Prouerbe . to see the day that I should haue wanted ; Whilest I had where-withall , I alwaies made this account ; But when I saw to what pouerty I was brought , I then knew the error I was in . And though I was a naughty man , yet I had a desire to be good ; not out of any true loue to goodnesse it selfe , but for the shunning of some greater euill , that otherwise might ensue . I had throwne aside my vices , forgetting them for a while , and had applied my selfe to labour and paines-taking ; I had trid●… all the meanes and wayes that might be to work Guzman could neuer thriue by any good courses . my selfe a fortune , and to come forward in the world ; but not any one of them that thriu'd with me . I was an vnfortunate man in all those better courses , that I ranne . Onely in doing ill was I lucky , I had a happy hand in filching and stealing , fortune only fauouring me so far , as to make me vnhappily-happy .

This is a cunning tricke , which sinne still puts vpon vs , to further vs with its counsaile , and to helpe those that are her champions , to the end , that Sinne , how she vseth her followers . with that heat and warmth they receiue from sinne , they may bee the better incouraged and drawne on with the more mettall , to commit more heynous crimes ; and when shee sees that they haue attained to the height of all villany , and that they cannot well climbe higher , shee tumbles them downe headlong with a witnesse . She makes them to mount by the ladder , but sends them downe by the rope . Differing herein from God , who workes after another manner . For he neuer sendeth vs any trouble , which he doth not accompanie with some blessing or other ; from our greatest miseries , groweth our greater glory : leading vs by a narrow path , to the broad and spatious way of blisse .

It seemeth vnto vs , that when we are swallowed vp as it were with desperation ; God is alwayes at hand to helpe vs . and that want and pouerty lye heauy vpon vs , that hee is forgetfull and vnmindfull of vs ; when as indeed , he is but like vnto that father , who for to teach his sonne to goe , maketh as if he did loosen his hand from him , faigning to let him goe alone by him-selfe , and for a while to see how hee will shift his feete , stands in some neere distance from him , yet not so farre off , but that hee still keepes him-selfe close by his side , and when walking softly , and with trembling steps towards him , he sees him ready to fall , he runnes in vnto him , and catching him in his armes , receiues him into them , and embraces him , not suffering him to fall to the ground . But when the father hath no sooner left him to him-selfe , but that either he makes too much haste , or will not goe at all , nor so much as offer to moue a foot , or letting goe his hold , vnfastning him-selfe from his fathers hands , he comes to catch a fall , the fault is not in the father , but in the sonnes either too much dulnesse , or too much haste .

We are of a naughty and an euill nature , wee are not willing to helpe our The naughty condition of mans nature . selues a iot , we doe not endeuour to doe our selues good , wee will not vse our best diligence , nor put to any helping hand of our owne , but looke ( like little children ) to haue our meat put still in our mouthes , ( being now big lubbers ) and that all should be put into our laps , without any paines , or care-taking of ours . But God is of that infinit goodnesse , that he neuer forgets vs , nor forsakes vs ; Hee knowes very well how to take away from the wicked in a moment , How God rewards the righteous . many great Lordships and Farmes , which they haue beene many yeares a purchasing ; and to enrich Iob within a little while , with double so much wealth , and those other good blessings which before he had taken from him .

I neuer had the grace to be so good ; but I am sure I was as naked as Iob. For Guzman as poore as Iob. I had nothing to leane my selfe against , saue onely the bare walls of my house . If , when I had plenty , I did pamper vp my selfe ; now I did desire , to haue only where-withall to hold life and soule together . I was ready to perish for want of food .

I remember ( when I was a youth ) that I had knowne in Madrid a pretty A Tale of a little boy . little boy , that was very well giuen , and for his yeares , of good vnderstanding . This little Lad was bred vp by a Gentle-woman , that was his mother , not that shee had borne him , but for the loue shee bore him ; shee gaue him good breeding both for his booke , and otherwise ; shee cloath'd him well , and handsomely ; and for his dyet , if there were one bit better then other at the boord , he was sure to haue his part of it . This childe was bred in Granada , where there are certaine little small grapes , which are very dainty ones indeed , wonderfull pleasant , and of an excellent relish ; which in those parts they call j●…ies . Now there being none of this kind in Madrid , and for that this little boy would not eat any other saue his owne Country grapes , when he saw he had none of that sort giuen him , seeing your d d Aluillas : A kinde of great gray , or whitish grapes . aluillas one day on the boord , he askt for some of those little ones , as he was wont to doe ; To whom his mother said ; Childe ; Here are no little ones to giue thee . We haue none but these : To whom the childe answered ; Then ( good Mother ) giue me some of those . For I can eat also great ones for a need .

I likewise could now feed vpon grosse fare , no meat came amisse , all was He that cannot liue as he would , must be content to liue as he may . sweet and sauourie vnto mee , nothing did hurt mee , but hunger without meat ; any thing , so as it were a belly full , it was all one to me . For the alterations of times , oblige all , and to all ; and to content our selues with those things , which are quite auerse to our nature , and no way suting with our disposition . I was driuen to doe that , which I neuer dreamt to haue done , to the end , that I might alwayes be able to say ; That neither selfe-loue made me doubt ; nor feare , dread to aduenture vpon any meanes whatsoeuer , that might make for my profit . And questionlesse , if I had wholly bent my selfe to some one set course or other , and had setled my selfe close vnto it , and constantly perseuered therein , I should haue done some good in it , and made it a meanes of no meane aduancement vnto me . But I was hot and cholericke ; I mis-spent my time ; and my beginnings being bad , I failed in the goodnesse of the ends . I had often resolued to be good , but I was quickly weary of well-doing ; I was that Prouerbe . e e Pi●…dra mouediza , 〈◊〉 la cubre moho . rolling stone , that neuer gathers mosse . And because I could not tame my selfe , time had now tamed me . I saw my selfe abandoned of all humane remedie , and had no hope of any other helpe , then that onely of my house . I began then to consider , and say with my selfe ; What haue I now in the house , to stanch my hunger withall ? Shall I bite vpon a brick-bat ? that is but tough feeding , and somewhat too hard a crust to gnaw vpon . Shall I roste one of my rafters ? That will be burnt away vpon the spit : I found that a naked house , without something to maintaine it , could not afford me any kinde of remedie . I could thinke vpon no better thing , then to betake my selfe to sacred Orders , and to become a Church man : Saying to my selfe ; I haue humane learning ; I will make benefit of that , by hearing those Lectures read in Alcala de Henares . I Guxman resolues to goe to the Vniuersitie . haue some little smackering also in the Liberall Arts , and Diuinitie , and when I haue studyed these a-while , I will take my Degree , then shall I be qualified for the Pulpit , and being able to say Masse , and to preach a Sermon , I shall be sure to haue wherewithall to eat ; and if all should fayle , I would turne Fryar at the last , whereby I should not onely liue vpon certainties , but should also lead a very safe and secure life . For a Dominus vobiscum , did neuer yet dye of hunger . By this course , I shall not only repayre my life , but I shall free it likewise from any danger whatsoeuer , which I might haue incurred by my former misdemeanors . The time , for the payment of my debts , drawes on a-pace , and my wealth goes away as fast ; if by this meanes I did not prouide for the storme , that was now a comming , I might afterwards see my selfe oppressed , and in great perill to be vtterly lost .

I knew that this came not from my heart , for I was not ignorant of mine owne euill inclination ; but he that hath no other meanes , and is put to his shifts , must doe as he may . He that cannot make choyse of his game , must flie at that which comes next in his way . Now that I am imbarked , I must play the cunning Mariner , and seeing I cannot sayle with a fore-winde , I must fetch boords , and come about with a side-winde . Any one will serue my turne , so it be not such a contrary winde , as shall chop me into the mouthes of my hungry Creditors . This is the key that must make all sure , and keepe them out from comming within me . The money that I shall make of this house , will serue well enough to maintaine me as a scholler ; which being well husbanded , though I should spend yearely a hundred Ducats , or a hundred and fiftie , which will be the most , ( and is a good liberall allowance ) I shall haue store of money for that time , that I shall need to continue there ; so that I may liue like a Duke , ( if I list my selfe ) and yet haue wherewithall to buy me bookes , and to take some honourable Degree . I will make choyse of a good Chamber-fellow , a What a student should doe . student of mine owne profession , that we may follow our studies close together , heare the Lectures , compare our Notes , communicate our doubts , that so by ioyning our forces together , and ayding one another , we should be able to quit our selues like braue fellowes , when we came to breake a lance in those lists . In this manner had I made vp my recknings with my selfe ; this was my consultation , and this was I fully resolued to put in execution . But how ill a consultation , and how worse a resolution , that I should determine to studie Diuinitie , more for the nourishing of this my body , then for the feeding of others soules ! How a Gods name should it enter into my imagination to be a Masse-Officiall , and not a Masse-priest ? Or that I should once thinke of becomming a Religious man , hauing such a scandalous spirit ? Accursed I , and accursed Young Diuines , what they should propose vnto them-selues . he , who is so vnhappy , as not primarily to propose vnto him-selfe the seruice and glory of God . And most vnfortunate are they of all others , who treat of their owne profit , of their preferments , of their honours , and of the maintayning of their backe and belly , by this so worthy and diuine a Calling ; and that doe not solely and wholly take the Ministerie vpon them , for no other end , but to be Gods Messengers , and to doe him seruice in his Church ; and What their ends ought to be . that shall not worthily performe that holy function ; and that shall not desire learning for any other end , then to be a light vnto himselfe , and vnto others .

Traytor as I was , why did I treat , like another Iudas , of the selling of my Master ? And I speake it to all , as well as to my selfe ; that he shall be taken for no other then a Traytor , that shall treat of being a Priest , or a Fryar , hauing no other ayme , but to feed his belly , cloath his backe , and spend lauishly . And that father is a Traytor , whosoeuer he be , that Fathers ought not to inforce their children to take Orders . shall enforce his sonne , contrary to his owne inclination and liking , to take the Ministerie vpon him , because his Grand-father , his Vnckle , his kinsman , or his friend , hath left him such a Patronage , or such an Advouson , if his sonne shall in such a time take holy Orders . When a father casts about with him-selfe to make his sonne a Fryar , or one , or more of his daughters Nunnes , either because hee hath not store of wealth to leaue them , or that he may leaue his other children the richer , or for any other worldly causes , which cannot be but vaine and idle , let him weigh and consider well with him-selfe what hee doth in so doing : For it is a great wonder , if one of a hundred proue good ( I say nothing of the Nunnes ) the most part of them , roming and rambling through the world , like a companie of vagabonds , and Apostata's , dishonouring their religion , disgracing their habit , putting their liues in perill , and sending their soules to Hell . It is God that must call vs to this holy Calling : For it is hee that anoynted Dauid , hee that made choyse of the Priests and the Prophets . The religious man must be religious , meerely for Religions sake ; for the very loue that hee beareth vnto it . This must be the principall end , this the substance , and all the rest but matter of dependance . For it Prouerbe . is fit and iust , that he that serues at the f f Quien sirve al Altar , como del . Altar , should liue by the Altar : and it were inhumanitie , when thy Oxe hath plowed thy ground , and laboured hard , to tye him to his stall , and giue him no meat . Let euery one open his eyes , and looke well about him , before he resolue as I did . Let him weigh well with him-selfe , what charge he takes vpon him , and what a deale of danger hee runnes . Let him first aske of him-selfe , what moues him to take that estate vpon him ? For by walking in the darke , the eye that sees not , must make the feet to stumble . The marke whereat a good Priest , and an honest religious soule should shoot at , must be brighter , purer , and clearer then the Sunne . Let not Parents thinke , that for to fill their sonnes bellies , they must needs make them Church-men : nor let them thinke , when they haue a lame , weake , sickly , vnprofitable , crumptback't , or ill-featur'd sonne , to offer him vpon Gods Altar , or to make him a Priest . For God will haue the best , and those that are without blemish for his sacrifice , being that hee offered vp the best that euer was for vs , when hee offered him-selfe in his beloued Sonne . Therefore if thou shalt make a bad choyce , thou wilt haue the worst of it . For if thou shalt reserue the better for thy selfe , and giue the worser vnto God , he will take them both away from thee , so that both thy eyes shall be put out ; hee will bereaue thee of the bad , because hee was not good enough for him ; and of the good , because thou thoughtst him too good . You must not Prouerbe . change g g No se han de ●…ocar los frenos . bridles , least you spoyle the horses mouthes : Euery horse must haue his owne bit : What need a continent man to h h No hare buen casado , vn continente . marry ? Or a lasciuious i i Seria malo vn lacivo , por religioso . wanton be made a Priest ? The one is not so fit for a wife ; And I am sure the other altogether vnfit for the Church . There are many habitations Prouerbe . in heauen , and euery one hath his right place appointed for him . Let euery man take that way , that may direct him to his saluation ; and let him not goe any other way , lest hee may chance to lose him-selfe ; and Prouerbe . thinking he treads in the right path , neuer sees his desire , nor that which hee pretends . It were a pretty kinde of ouer-sight in me , if being to goe from Madrid to Barajas , I should take ouer Segouia bridge , and passe on to Guadarrama . Or being to goe for Valladolid , I should make for Siguença . Doest thou not see how thou art out of thy way ? Doest thou not perceiue thy folly ? Let a Virgin , be a Virgin ; A marryed man , a marryed man : Let the Continent abstaine ; The Religious , be religious : And let euery one goe on in the way that is set before him , without turning to the right hand , or to the left .

I was resolued to be a Church-man , and for no other reason in the world , but onely to repayre a broken fortune , to fill my belly , and to be free from my Creditors ; who , as soone as my ten yeares were out , were to come vpon my backe . With this , I finely stopt their mouthes , shut the gap whereat they should enter , and left them to shake their eares . I sold my house for almost as much as it cost me : For albeit men doe vsually sell houses to great losse , yet mine yeelded mee little lesse then what it stood mee in . For I did value it at somewhat the dearer rate , because it was bettered by the bordering buildings that were round about it , which time had wrought for mee . When the Scriuener had drawne the writings , and that they were ready to be sealed , and I to receiue my money , I said ; An abuse about the rates of houses in Spaine , set downe here at large by Guzman . That before I proceeded therein any farther , wee would goe to his house , that was the publike Officer for the rating of mens goods , that we might haue a Licence from him vnder his hand , requiring his confirmation of the Contract that was betweene vs , and that wee might conclude with him touching the sessing of the rent , as also the twentieth part that was to goe out , and to be leuyed vpon the sale of the house . When we came thither , and had cast vp our reckonings , we found that the sessment came not to aboue six Royals , but the twentieth part to better then a thousand fiue hundred . Mee thought this was somewhat cruell , and beyond all reason of policie , that I should giue him such a great summe of money , which amounted to more then the Fee-simple of the ground , whereon I built it . I stood vpon it , and was very loth to pay him so much , but because my standing out might haue hindred the sale thereof , and so I might haue let slip the occasion of doing my selfe good , I paid those duties ; but with protestation , to require the same againe by course of Iustice , as a thing which in all Law and Conscience , hee could not duely challenge of me .

The Master of the Office began to laugh at me , as if I had vttered some famous foolery . And it might very well be so ; but as then it did not seeme so vnto me . I askt him , why hee laught : He told mee , at my pretension . And that he would returne me all my money againe , on condition , that I would but giue him halfe a Royall euery day , till I had sentence on my side in this sute . I was about to haue accepted of it ; it seeming to my vnderstanding , that an ill custome ought not so farre to ouer-sway reason , but that vpon discouering the cunning and deceit vsed therein , it would easily be abrogated , and broken . Nor would this which I speake of , beene my case alone , but all the whole Kingdome would haue put in their plea into the Courts of Iustice ; and as well for their priuate profit , as the publike good , would haue declar'd them-selues in my fauour , to the end that there might be some order taken for the redressing of so great a wrong . I was not so wide of the marke ; nor did I goe vpon such weake grounds ; but that with that which I then knew , I thought I should be able strongly to maintayne my opinion , it seeming vnto mee scientiam certam , a setled knowledge , the certaintie whereof could not be gaine-said .

It might haue so fallen out , that I might haue defended it with a little coste , and peraduenture I might haue spent much in it , and so much , that not onely this one , but all others of this kinde , might haue beene vtterly ouerthrowne . As it did once happen with certaine Sessings , that were a-foot in those dayes , for that it was found out at last , that there was in the setting of those rates a certaine kinde of Vsury , which our State doth not allow . The cause which moued mee to this Defence was , because I saw it grew out of the discourse of naturall Reason : considering with my selfe , that onely from thence , all Lawes had their beginning .

But because this businesse crept in by degrees , and was not so currant and common in the world , as now it is , it was not much stood vpon . But if wee shall a little more curiously search into it , and the abuse thereof were well lookt into , I doubt not but it would appeare so harsh and sower to most mens tastes , that it would in some great part , if not wholly , be reformed . For suppose a thing not to bee worth any more then that which is giuen for it ; and that this which is giuen , ought to bee limited , finite , and certaine . Now , if to mee they should sell that plot of ground for a thousand Royals , with two Royals of perpetuall rent vpon it , and that there is not any man that will giue more for it , nor indeed is worth any more ; and that I haue spent in building a house vpon it , three thousand Ducats at least in good money : If it bee a truth , and a Rule in Law , that no man ought to make himselfe rich with another mans wealth ; why should this prolling Officer inrich himselfe out of my moneyes . For that this , which giues this valew , and inhances the price of the ground , is mine owne peculiar purse , and those moneyes I laid out my selfe , is a cleare case , and cannot bee denyed . So that , if the same building , which I had reared , should bee taken downe and carryed away , the ground it selfe would remaine vpon the very same tearmes , as it did before that I had bought it : So that this twentieth peny to be leauied out of it , seemeth in my poore vnderstanding , to be rather poena delicti , a punishment for the offence that I had committed in building me an house , then debitum iustum , a iust and due debt ; because it hath its being from a bad cause .

And so true is this , which I haue already told you ; that in case euen that very day , that I sold this house , I should haue placed a pillar in it , or a Statua of stone , of some great value , and that buying the same together with my house , hee should giue me in the whole ten thousand Ducats , out of which summe , this officer will haue a twentieth part ; if I , to excuse this intolerable taxe , may take away , and haue taken away the Statua , and afterwards sell the house for onely one thousand Ducats ; I may well iustifie the doing of it , and they can demand no more of me , then what accrewes vnto them out of the price of the house . But that we may proceed a little farther ; If I should afterwards carry away all the yron-worke , the timber , and the glasse ; if I should demolish the wals , and should make it , of a house of tenne thousand Ducats , scarce worth a hundred , I may likewise doe it . And I may lawfully sell all that I thus tooke away , and separated from the house , without being charged with the twentieth part .

How then can this hang together , that the parts , euery one of them being taken seuerally by them-selues , doe owe no such taxe , but in whole , and in grosse , should be lyable to this debt ? If the master of this office should say vnto me ; you are to pay me the twentieth part of that price , whereat you first bought this plot of ground , for the which you paid a thousand Royals , and that the charge where-with he charged me , should still runne on in this set and certaine kind of manner , there were some reason for it ; as being grounded vpon Dominium rectum , a true and lawfull claime ; for that it was sold with that condition , at such a set price , with such a reseruation of a perpetuall rent vpon it , which I voluntarily and willingly did accept of . But how can he oblige me , or I consent to pay that which I my selfe doe not know what it is , nor how much it may come to , & which peraduenture may amount to such an excessiue summe , that onely with that twentieth part , I might buy a whole Towne . And as those that I bestow'd vpon my house , were but three thousand Ducats , they might as well haue beene three hundred , or thirty thousand , and that house might hap to haue beene sold thirty time , in one yeare , which would haue come to an excessiue and exorbitant sessment . And such vnreasonable rates as these are neyther ratified in the Ciuill nor the Canon Law ; nor hath any other ground or foundation for it , but that which ariseth from that which wee call ius Gentium , or the Law of Nations . And that , not commune , but priuatum , not common , but priuate : for it is imposed , as it pleaseth the Imposer , nor doth it passe generally in all places , but in some particular parts ; & within foure leagues compasse , in some townes they pay it , and in some , not . Especially in Sevill , and in almost all Andaluzia they know no such thing , nor so much as euer once heard of it . The perpetuall Sessment , that was first setled , this , I say , is euer more truly paid , without any other taxes or tallages , though the said possession or house should be solde a hundred thousand times ouer .

Now , for to make the carrying away of the twentieth part lawfull , it must be by the vertue of a Common-Law , ratified and confirmed by the approbation and consent of the whole Kingdome : but this neyther is so , nor euer was , but onely approued by the ignorant ; and such mens errour , cannot make this good . There is no man but knowes the nature and qualitie of your Sessings , as also how and which way they are to bee raised , and with what reason and moderation , and how much is to be paid out of euery hundred : And if these bee lyable to the Lawes , and subiect to their censure ; why should not these perpetuall sessings , as they call them , submit themselues in like manner to the Lawes ? What strange kinde of taxes are these ? What new kinde of deuices to wrong the subiect ? What reason is there , that they should be paid in this manner ? What ground haue they for it ? They haue but two prices to worke vpon : Eyther that , for which I bought it ; or that for which I sold it . And why should they not rather pitch vpon the price for which it was bought , then for which it was solde ? Will they oblige me to pay these duties out of mine owne particular moneyes , out of my proper expences , out of mine owne improuing of my estate , and out of mine owne proper industry ?

So that euery way , this Case being nakedly laid open , and duely considered , there being no greater eyther Law or Reason on their side , then I can see as yet , it seemeth vniust , that they should take that my wealth from mee , which I had bona fide spent vpon it , or from my Wife and my Children , being that the one halfe thereof is ordinarily lost , that is laid out in building . Why then should it be permitted , that my principall , by the benefit of that peece of ground , should not onely become lesse , then before , but that I must afterwards also pay , and lose that which they take from me , and carry away with this their twentieth part ?

And in case it must be paid , as paid it is , and that to a peny ; let it be lookt into , treated of , and determined : for it being defined and set downe , we will rest satisfied , because it hath beene consulted on , and that good heads had the handling of it , who would not willingly doe any thing but what is iust and honest ; and therefore ought to like of it . But till that course be taken , the people take great scandall thereat ; not a man but talkes , and that liberally to of the great wrong and iniury which they receiue hereby . Some , holding it for a great peece of iniustice ; and others , not able to containe them-selues , styling it with worser names .

This past with mee at that time with the Receiuer of these Sessments . But h●…e and I were well met , wee were ene as wise one as another ; I knew little , and hee not ouer-much . Hee would needs reply vnto mee , saying ; That , was the condition of the Contract , and therefore was of force : For a man may oblige himselfe as farre out of his owne free will , as if hee had beene otherwise bound . This did not satisfie mee , wherefore I answered that truly , That it were likewise a Condition of Contract , if I should lend an hundred Ducats , which were to be paid vnto mee within such a time , wherein if hee fayled , he was to pay mee euery day eight Royals , till hee had paid mee the Principall . But this is not lawfull : So that , to iustifie a thing , it is not enough , that it is a Condition contracted , and agreed vpon ; but wee must see whether it be alowable and lawfull .

Then hee turned vpon me againe , and told mee : This , Sir , is but a matter of hap-hazard : for , that a house be solde , or not be sold , is a meere venture : and if it be not solde , there is nothing due vnto me . O what a good reason ( quoth I ) is this ? As soone therefore as the house is solde , the twentieth part must bee as a punishment of the Contract . And if it be , why doe you binde my hands , and prohibit , that I may not sell it to such and such persons ? You your selfe , by your owne confession , condemne the Contract . You open the doore to all that may pay you , you sell the thing for that it is worth , and you will haue the Iudians to giue you the sw●…t of their browes , and take paines for you , and for no other end , but to better your owne ground , and by securing you of a good round summe of money , they augment your wealth by diminishing their owne : And when they must liue thus by the losse , wilt thou haue one out of twenty ? But say such a thing should be done mala fide , yet you may pretend your right ; but of that possession whereof you are now depriued , and haue made me Lord thereof in your roome , shall I out of those things , which I may , as it pleaseth mee , eyther remoue thence , of bring thither ; will you haue a pension out of that , which I haue ordained for my pleasure ? Of the Statuas , the Pyramides , the Fountaines , of whose conduits and waters , I alwayes am Lord and Master , and can alienate all this from thee , without letting thee haue any part therein ? wilt thou haue it adiudged vnto thee , because thou saist it must follow with the whole , as a thing that is founded on thy ground ?

That totum of yours , I doe not well vnderstand ( said he ) what it is , neither can I beleeue that it can be brought within the compasse of iustice , and that you can carry it away by Law . And I am verily perswaded , that they who know and vnderstand these things , and are able to determine of them , will not incline not to your part .

I paid him that which he call'd his due , though sore against my wil , & hauing made my protestation against it , I beganne to follow the sure : but because the Schooles at Alcala were now shortly to be opened , and that the time d●…ew neer for the Reading of their Lectures , I gaue that ouer , that I might goe about that which did more neerly concerne me . And so committing the ca●…e of this and some other businesses to a Solicitor , a friend of mine , and to my father-in-law , I prepared for my iourney . I got me my money together , and put in out to profit , which yeelded me a moderate gaine , purposing to spend vpon my selfe so much as was needful & necessary for me . I made me a cloak , and a Sotana , prouided my self of bedding & such other implements as were fitting for a students chamber , a●…d so presently got me to Alcala de Henares , where I had so often wisht to be .

When I came thither , I was doubtfull with my selfe , what I were best to doe , not knowing as yet what to resolue vpon , and whether it would bee my better and more profitable course , to take a k k The Spanish word is camarista , which is one that hath no house for him-selfe , nor keepes company with any other , but hyres him a chamber in some house , where he lodgeth , and locks him-selfe vp , without conuersing with the rest of that house . chamber by my selfe , and to bee all alone , or to be vnder l l In your vniuersities in Spaine , they are called Pupils , that are vnder a Tutor , for their diet , and their gouernment . And this house where they diet and lodge , they call Pupillage . Covarr . verb. Pupilo . A Student that puts him-selfe in Commons with a Tutor and his scholler , what things he must be subiect vnto . pupillage , and common with others . I had knowne already what it was to keepe and gouerne a house , to bee chiefe commander of it , to please mine owne taste , and to enioy mine owne liberty . Yet notwithstanding , hauing respect to the lesser trouble of the two , I was content at last to take my fortune in the Common , amongst the rest of those Pupils that dyeted altogether in one house , though it went somewhat against the haire with me , ( I must confesse ) to submit my selfe to the poore and slender pittance of a Master ouer Pupils , who was to command in the house , to sit at the vpper end of the table , to diuide the Commons , and to giue euery man his portion vpon his plate , with those his filthy , and perhaps mangy fingers , and those his foule and dirty nailes , as crooked , and as long , as those of an Ostriche , tearing , rather then cutting the flesh , out into threads and strings , like the rending of the barbes , from the root of some plant , or young tree , distributing the porrige in Lettice leaues , to make it stretch the farther , cutting the bread eauen , and giuing euery one his slice for the auoiding of waste , allowing vs no new bread , but that which was stale and hard , that we might eate the lesse of it ; our m m Olla , is all that meat , whatsoeuer is sod together in a pot . Covarr . verb. Olla . Olla , was nothing but the fat of bacon , whence onely it might take its name , which made a very glorious broth to see to , and more cleare then the light , at least so bright that a man might easily discerne the least Louse that fell from our sleeues in the bottome of the porringer . Which if we did not swallow downe in stead of a crumme , we would take forth with our fingers , and cracke it betweene our nayles . And of these kind of repastes , we had some foure and fifty euery month ; for on the Saturdayes , we alwaies made our meales of n n The tripes or intrals of any beast . Mondongo's . In fruit-time we had some foure Cherries , three sowre Plummes , one or two little Apricocks , halfe a pound of Figges , and now and then a whole pound , according to the number of those that sate at table ; but in that minced and curtall manner , that there was none of vs so nimble finger'd , that wee could come to vye it the second time .

Our Grapes were diuided by little sprigs or bunches , such as they giue little children to their Beuer , being no more in the whole , then would lie vpon a poore little plate , and he that had most , had not aboue sixe Grapes that fell to his share .

And of these , you must vnderstand , that we had not all of all sorts euery day , but in one onely kind : for when we had Figges we had no Grapes , and when we had Cherries we had no Apricockes . Our Tutor would tell vs , that too much fruit would breed tertian Agues , and therefore for our healths sake , hee would not haue vs to eate any more , for feare we should be sicke .

In winter time , vpon a little plate , thinly scattered , wee should haue a few Raisins laid out , as if they had meant to dry them in the Sunne , so farre off were they sundred the one from the other .

For our last course , to close vp our stomacke , we had a thinne slice of cheese , which seemed rather to be a Spiders-web then any thing else , or like those thinne shauings which your Ioyners planish away with their playners when they shaue their wainscoat ; alledging that those thicker slunchins would dull our wits . Besides , it was so full of eyes , and so transparent , that whosoeuer had seene it , would haue iudg'd it to haue beene the diaphragma , or that thin and slender caule of some young little Kid , or some Lambkins mid-riffe ; and for a need might haue seru'd in stead of spectacles , so easily could wee see through them .

Other whiles we had halfe a Pompeon amongst vs all , and a little thinne cut of a small Melon , nothing so bigge as a mans head , but about the bignesse of my fist , or a well growne Peare . And vpon fish-dayes , we had a messe of lentill porrige , such as Aesope was fed withall , being no better then Duckes-meat ; and if at any time we had pease-porrige , ( which was very seldome , that we had such Gau-dies ) I assure you , that the best and the cunningest Indian diuer of them all , that fishes for Pearle , must haue been forced to haue diued foure times at least , to the bottome of my porringer , before he should be able to bring vp one of these pearles ; which how scarce they were to bee met withall , you may iudge by this , that the pease had not giuen so much tincture to the porrige as would serue to giue a colour to a wenches coyre . One day in the Lent , and no more , hee did vse to giue vs chesse-nuts for an Antipast to whet our stomackes , but no honey with them , for that they were sweet enough ( he said ) of them-selues ; and of those too , we had but a few , for he would tell vs , we were as good eate so much wood , they were so hard of digestion .

What shall I say vnto you concerning our fish , which was poorer then the worst poore - Ihon , of our withered and rott●…n ropes of , Onions , our pulpe-fish , our dryde pilchards , that had hung I know not how long in the smoake , and a man had as good almost be hang'd as to haue eaten of them , being so drye , and so salt , as if they would haue fretted out our very guts and bowels . Wee had euery one a piece , and had the head also in to the bargaine , if it were a fasting-day ; but on other dayes , we had but halfe a one , and that was slit asunder head and all , and equally diuided betweene two of vs .

What shall I tell you of that other fi●…h , which the Abbot would not meddle with , because it was so rammish , and stancke so vilely ? yet they set it before vs , and wee must be contented with it . As also of our fride egges , that wee had now and then , like vnto those in some base Inne , or poore victualling house , or little better , if not sometimes worse ; for they would buy a great many of them together , that they might haue them the better cheape , keeping them in a tub of ashes , or in some great heape of salt , that they might not grow stale and addle ; and in this manner would they preserue them some sixe or seauen moneths , whole and sound .

What shall I say to our benediction and giuing of thankes both before and A tale of a Student . after our meales , and how necessarily we were tied to say a solemne grace ? In so much , that a certaine Student , w●…o cooke his diet in such another kind or Ordinary , as I did , comming late to dinner , and being very hot with the haste that hee had made before they should haue dined , fell to vnbuttoning of his doublet , and to vnbrace him-selfe for coolenesse , and when hee was about to fall to his meat , he might heare them beginne to giue thankes : with that hee strucke his hand against the boord , and with a loud voice said vnto them ; Silence ( my masters ) I know not what I should giue thankes for , let them giue thankes that haue cause so to doe , for I see none .

At supper we had a sallat , but a very poore one , and a great deale of chopt greene stuffe , ( I know not what ) amongst it ; for they would not lose so much as the greene leaues of a Radish roo●…e , or the blade of an Onion , whereof they would not make vse , powring a little vnsauory oyle into it , and a little vinegar , whereof the one halfe was water , the Lettice were onely thinnely spred vpon the top , with two or three sh●…es of Carrets , with a little Marjoram or Pennyry●…ll mixed with it ; they were wont some-times to intermixe with it ( but alwayes all the Summer long ) a hodge p●…dge of boyled mutton , that was nothing but mammocks .

They would buy of the reffuse-bones , which the Cookes had left out , when they made their pies : they did cost but little , and tooke vp much roome . The show being greater then the price . And when we had not whereon to gnaw , we wanted not yet whereof to sucke ; and the hungry sauour of our porrige , was a shooing-horne to d●…w 〈◊〉 the hardnesse four bread . Wee had also certaine wilde Oliues allowed vs , 〈◊〉 we should not ●…ate too many of them , for feare of setting our teeth on edge . O●…r wine was like that which they gaue our Sauiour vpon the Crosse , compound stuffe , that tasted worse then sowre beere .

What shall I tell you of the care that our Tutors wife had , to notifie vnto vs the fasting dayes that were in euery weeke , to the end , that we might not looke for our Collation ; nor call for our breake-fast ; and for the more surety , that shee might not erre , shee would vsually say there were two , when there was but one . What shall I tell you of the commutation of our suppers into dinners , which being put both together would not make vp a reasonable nunchions . Which when they did giue it vs , was weighed out as iust , and as euen , as you would weigh out Saffron , allotting to euery one his foure ounces , and not a penny-weight ouer ; as if this same Casuist , who did thus size vs , did know our necessitie , and how much would iust serue our turne ; or as if in regard of our long studies , and short dinners , ( and those none of the best ) we had no reason to finde fault , seeing we were vs'd all alike , and were now entred like fellow-labourers into one and the selfe-same Vineyard , where euery man must haue one and the same allowance , not one hauing more then another . Or , as if the food that they gaue vs , were well fitted and proportioned for our sustenance ; being that all was so limited , so scanted , so little , and so ill drest , that your schoole-boyes , and poorer sort of schollers could not haue their dyet in a worse fashion , who haue their stomacks pin'd to their back-bone , who haue more minde to a good meale , then a good lecture , and a greater will Marcus Autelius his saying . to eat , then to studie .

This our Tutor that boorded vs , would now and then tell vs , that Marcus Aurelius was wont to say ; That Sots and Fooles onely had poore studies of bookes , and tables plentifully furnisht with meats ; stinting their mindes more then their bellies ; but that a wise man ( showing him-selfe therein most wise ) doth abhorre full dishes , and will feed very sparingly , that he may the sooner and the better retyre him-selfe to his studies : That hoggs , and horses , fatnesse did well become them ; but that it was more commendable in men , to be leane and slender ; for that your grosse men are commonly grosse-witted ; besides , they haue a filthy wallowing gate ; they are vnfit to fight either for them-selues , or their friends ; they are a kinde of vnweldie lumpe , an vnprofitable masse of flesh and bone , being not able to vse any manly exercise ; whereas we see it is quite otherwise in those that are leane , and not laden with fat .

I was willing to graunt him this , to the end that he might not denie me a more manifest truth then the other ; to wit ; That a little meat , and that naught , quickly shortens the life of man . And if I may not liue to thriue by my studies , it is but lost labour to drudge at my booke . What Falcon I pray , was euer brought into the field to flie , which was not first fed before shee came there ? What Greyhound , or other dogge , was euer put to course , or to hunt , before they had put victuals into his belly ? They must both be kept reasonably high , and not come hunger-staru'd into the field ; for then will neither the one maintayne her flight , nor the other his course . They must be kept in good state ; and so must we Students . There is a meane in all things ; and that meane is the best . We will grant to these meat-moderators , these gut-mathematicians , That it is not fit to feed to fulnesse , nor to cram the belly as full as it will hold : so as they will yeeld againe on the other side , that we are not to fast , till we grow so feeble therewith , that our leggs are not able to support our bodies . And we had one Student there amongst vs , who was well knowne to haue his guts shrunke , and his excrements growne mouldie through the penuriousnesse of his dyet . Yet notwithstanding I thought good to make choyce , as of the lesser inconuenience , to enter into pension ; it seeming vnto me , that being ( as I was ) a man of some yeares , if I should take a chamber-fellow vnto me , I must consort my selfe with one that was mine equall , and such another as I am ; considering with my selfe , that as our countenances must be differing , so we might differ in our conditions ; whereby it might so come to passe , that whereas I had a purpose to profit my selfe by learning , my studies might end in the harmefull exercise of Vices , frequenting them more then the Schooles . Of two euils , I chose the lesse ; and so became a Pupill : Though I knew they would play vpon me , and laugh and scoffe at me , to see such a Gyant as I was , in regard of the rest , with such a bigge muzzell , and such another great beard , as the good wife of Pen̄aranda , to sit and conuerse with boyes . Yet it was some comfort vnto mee , that there were likewise some boorders amongst vs , that were as bigge Lubbers ( almost ) as my selfe ; so that ( to say the truth ) wee , and those lesser frye , were mixed one amongst another , like pease and beanes . And this benefit I had by boording my selfe , that I was free from all manner of care and trouble , not being put to make mine owne prouision , nor to take thought either for my dinner or my supper , but remayned free and at full libertie to follow my booke , and such other things as I had most minde vnto . For hee that will attend his studies , must first studie to remoue all impediments , that may be a hinderance vnto them ; and he that will not doe so , may goe shooe goslins , for any great good hee shall get thereby . I did seeke all that I could to auoyd your Innes-of Court wenches , those your ancient mayds , or more elderly matrones , that make a liuing of sweeping chambers , mak●…ng of beds , emptying of pis-pots , and other the like seruile offices ; for they are worse then fire , burning and consuming whatsoeuer is before them .

What we say of these , may likewise be meant of our Mistresses , our Tutors wiues ; we may put them all into a packe , and shuffle them together ; Mistresse and mayd , mayd and mistresse , all is one ; there is not a halfe-penny odds betweene them : O , how my fingers ends doe itch at them ! How much better were it to boxe them about the eares , and to tugg them by the hayre of the head , then to doe them any the least kindnesse , or courtesie in the world . I speake of these Gouernesses ouer your young Students , who will seeme to take all the care vpon them of guiding the house , and ordering all things in good fashion , as if nothing could be done well without them , when as there is not a more rascall , or ●…oguisher kinde of people in the world . O how quicke and nimble in filching and stealing ! how dull and lazie to doe any labour ! O how cleane would they make our chests ; but how foule would they keepe the house !

Our Master had one Gouernesse amongst the rest , who did commonly steale from vs a third part of that which sheee should haue giuen vs : And when shee could no ▪ come to the fingring of our money , or to pilfering this or that other thing out of our cofers , or our trunkes ; shee would rob vs of our coales , our spices , our pease , and whatsoeuer else shee could cleanely lay hands on , and these commodities she kept apart by them-selues , and when they were growne to some pretty quantitie , s●…ee would sell that vnto vs , which we had payd for already ; faigning to haue bought that , which we well knew shee had stolne . If shee were to wash our linnen , shee would cozen vs of our sope , and what with the boysterous blowes of her beetle , squashing and beating them vpon some stone , or washing blocke , and rensing them in riuer water with I know not how many lauers , shee made our cloathes reasonable white , though shee tooke away two thirds of the life of the threads , which wee were forced , through all handling , to turne into tindar , sooner , then had it beene well vs'd , we needed to haue done . So that we were not onely damnified by that which shee purloyned from vs , but shee marred and quite spoyled that which remayned vnto vs . Now if you would faine know , how shee spent that which she had thus got , hearken vnto me , and I shall tell you .

This Gouernesse , mayd , seruant , huswife , kitchen-drudge , or what other name such a vile creature can be capable of , when shee did not sell that which shee had stolne , shee kept it for some poore Scholler , or Seruitor , that was her sweet-heart , on whom with all care and diligence shee attended , furnishing him with all such things as he had neede of ; he could not lacke that , which shee would not presently helpe him to . For him would shee steale our bread ; for him would shee skimme our pot , reseruing the very best , and as it were the very creame and flower of all that was therein for him . And if by chance he were in the house , shee would be sure to giue him of the fattest of the porridge , with sippets of bread throughly soaked in it , and flesh without bones , and his linnen cleanely and handsomly washt with sope ; and in a word , shee maintaynd him well out of our meanes ; for it was our , and not her purse , that paid for it .

In conclusion , such kinde of women , as these , are preiudiciall , vntamable , notable lurchers , arrant theeues ; farre worse then that souldiers boy , Tricks of a knauish wagg . who playd the wagg-pasty with his Masters pastie ; and of eight Marauedis made twelue . For hee opened the lid of the pastie , that it was not to be perceiued , and supt vp all the sirrop and sweetnesse that was in it . Afterwards , his Master sending him for wine , he kept the eight Marauedis that were giuen him , to him-selfe , and sold the Iarre for foure , presently comming crying home vnto him , and telling him , that the Iarre brake by the way , and all the wine was spilt .

There neuer came a quarter of mutton into the house , but that by little and little , we lost a fifth part of it , and with it the kidney , saying ; That for the deuotion which shee bare to the blessed Saint Zoilo , shee would not boyle that part ; so that the kidneyes neuer came to our share ; they fell to her sweet-hearts lot . But he was not so deuoted vnto her , as to offer her all that he had . There was not any thing that we had , whereof he had not a part , nay sometimes all : saying , I put it here , it stood there but now , the Cat hath eaten it , some body or other hath taken it away , and a thousand such excuses to serue her turne , stealing and filching from vs at her pleasure . But will you peraduenture seeke to restraine these theeues , to limit them , to keep them within their bounds , or to hinder them in any thing contrary to their liking ? It is impossible to doe it . Speake but a word vnto them , that doth not please them , there is not a house in all that street , not a shop , a tauerne , nor an ouen , where shee will not make a large relation of your life , reckning vp all the miracles done by you , painting you out to be a wretched and vnfortunate man , base-minded , a crib , a hunger-staru'd whore-sonne , a miserable wretch , of an ill condition , a grumble-seede , one that is still murmuring , that a Hen cannot lay an egge , but you must be prying into her nest , that you must haue an eye to the skimming of the pot , that you will tye your bacon to a string , and put it into the kettle amongst other meat , a fourth part whereof shall serue you a whole weeke , taking it out one day , and putting it in another , making thy meale of one poore morsell , to make it hold out the longer . Will you turne her out of doores , and take another , you shall not finde any that will come at you ; and so you must be forced to serue your selfe : for shee that is gone from you , will tell her that is to come vnto you , what a manner of man you are , what an ill life shee led with you , and for what cause shee quit her-selfe of your seruice . In a word , hee that will be serued by them , must winke at all their faults , must make no replyes , and besides , must let them doe what they lift , let them haue their owne will , and yet that will scarce content them .

I remember , that before I was marryed , I receiued a maid-seruant into my house ; and for that shee was a beastly filthy slut , an idle drone , and altogether vnfit for seruice , I turn'd her away after shee had beene some three dayes with me : Then I tooke another , who seemed to be in good health when shee came vnto me , but falling sicke of her old disease , shee onely continued with mee two dayes , and went backe againe to the Hospitall , from whence shee came . Presently after I had a third , a neat seruant , but a great theefe ; for willing her to roste me a Conie , shee cuts it in peeces , and stues it , and brought onely to the table the head , the leggs , and the wings , disposing of the rest as shee thought good ; for which roguery of hers , shee stayd with mee onely that day , and the next morning I put her away .

When my neighbours saw that I had three seruants in six dayes , and that euery one of them went away mumbling their mattens , and murmuring at mee , a bad report went of mee , they laid a hundred faults to my charge , and did discredit my sernice in that shamefull and vile manner , that for some twenty dayes after , I was faine to take my dyet in a common victualing ●…ose . For no woman would be drawne to my house , by reason of the euill speech that was giuen of mee , till such time , as a friend of mine , brought mee one , that was worse then all the rest : for shee would be in loue with euery body , and denie none that would aske her the question : Not any Stallion that came amisse to her : Shee was a wheele , that was easily to be turned with euery hand . I would presently haue put her away , but I durst not , for feare of being ill spoken of by my neighbours . And I tell you the truth : For this cause I held it the lesser inconuenience of the two , to leaue my house , and to hyre me another in some other street that was farther off , keeping her till then with mee , before I would dismisse her . And so I did . If you were at home , shee would be abroad ; if you were abroad , shee would be at home . If ●…ee haue nothing to doe , shee will call to you for flaxe ; and if you giue it her , shee will say you are miserable , and too great a husband . And neither of these , are without their mysterie . But this I leaue to your coniecture .

And how can you imagine them to be otherwise then ill disposed in their persons , when as there is not any Gouernesse , especially amongst these your Schollers , which is not branded with the like basenesse ? These kinde of creatures , would not conuerse with all , nor yet filch from all , they would haue little or nothing to doe with your young idle fellowes , that lye loytring in the market-place , nor with your Lackayes , nor steale from some , though they found it lying before them vpon the ground .

I did not make any reckoning of it , nor did it trouble me so much , to see that they rob'd me of my goods , or that they were neuer without one sweet-heart or other , that still haunted their companie , though I was not willing to giue way to any such things in my house ; as that they went about to rob me of my iudgement and my vnderstanding , and to depriue me of my senses ; for with lyes and teares they would seeke to grace and countenance their villanies ; so that though the truth thereof appeared vnto me as cleare as noone day , and that with these eyes I plainely perceiued their rogueries , their knaueries , and all their wicked shifts and deuices , yet they would force mee whether I would or no , and contrary to mine owne knowledge , to hold their conuersation , and their cariage to be good and honest . A man must suffer much at their hands , euen at all times , and in all ages . If they be old , they are starke naught ; if young , farre worse . And if one be so troublesome , what will two be ? Happy is that man , that can excuse him selfe of them , and serue him-selfe with lesse ; for no man is worse serued , then he that is most serued .

Notwithstanding , I protest , that I do not speake this of our Mrs Gouernesse , or with purpose that shee should heare me , for I know her to be a good woman , and of that kinde nature , that shee will forget and forgiue all , if you will but begin to her in a cup of wine .

I was now setled in my Pupillage , which I patiently suffered , that I might not suffer : What was amisse I sought to amend , by some prouision of damties , which I kept still in store in my chamber , with which I past the better , entertayning my stomacke with them , when I saw it was needfull . Wee thought it good discretion so to doe , and our Master was well content with it , that we should roste a good lunch of porke , o●… boyle vs a friendly peece of bacon , and onely out of the hope that he had , that we would inuite him vnto it . And I doubt not but all Tutors , by a generall consent , would yeeld to accept of such conditions as these , foure dayes in a weeke .

Liuing in this manner , as I haue told you , after I had studied the Arts , and the Metaphysicks , and had duely obserued those publike Lectures that were required of me , they gaue me the second place ; when I was presented to take my Degree , the whole Vniuersitie crying out , that they had therein done me great wrong , in taking the first place from mee , that they might conferre it on a Gentle-mans sonne of good ranke and qualitie , but my Iunior .

Hauing taken my Degree , I began now to fall to my Diuinitie , and to frequent those Lectures . I entred into it with a great deale of delight ; for I tooke much pleasure in following my booke , the bayt that drew me on , being that most sweet entertaynment of the Schooles , because it was a kinde of life , that was somewhat neere a-kinne to that , which I had alwayes led . Where doth a man enioy more liberty , then in the Vniuersitie ? And who liues so The commendation of a schollers life . merry and so quiet a life , as your schollers ? What entertainments of all sorts whatsoeuer , haue not your Students amongst them ? There is not the thing you can name , that they want . In a word , they haue what they will ; and doe what they will . If they will be ciuill and retyred , they may fit them-selues with companie that shall iumpe iust with them : If loose and dissolute , they shall meet with as mad waggs as them-selues . There euery birde shall finde some of his owne feather , such as shall equally sute with them in their disposition . The studious shall haue those that will conferre with them about their studies , that will keepe their set houres , write our Lectures , compare their Notes , and punctually performe all those laudable exercises , that appertaine to a good Student : And if they are disposed to walke abroad , they are like vnto your Biskayners , those women that liue in the mountaynous Countries ; who , where-soeuer they goe , carry their distaffe along with them , that a man may truly say of them , That they plow , spinning . Where-soeuer you light vpon a Student , though he be out of his Colledge , and walkt abroad , with a purpose onely to recreate him-selfe by the Riuers side , in those sweet and pleasant fields , yet euen then doth his wit and his memory also goe a-walking , calling to minde what he hath read , arguing and reasoning vpon this , or that other point , and conferring with him-selfe on those things , which he hath studied , being neuer lesse alone , then when he is thus alone . For men that employ their time well , though alone , cannot be truly said to be alone . If once in a yeare , he will take his liberty , and ride into the Country , slacking for a while the stringe of his bowe , fetching some vagari●…s abroad to make merry with his friends ; what sports or what pastimes can be equall'd with theirs ? How by their Art will they make a Pastie to runne of it selfe vp and downe the table ? A Melon , to roll from one end of the boord to the other ? Your biskets , and other dishes of sweet-meats to dance as they will haue them ? Who can so featly doe these tricks as they ? If you will giue your Mistresse musicke at her window , if you will bestow a posie on her , some fine embleme , or the like deuice , entertaine her with pretty iests , and witty conceits , will you haue them with a stentorious voyce to deliuer an Oration extempore , to maintayne Paradoxes for pleasure and entertainment , to presse an Argument to the proofe , to inuent a thousand merry toyes , to passe away the time , to make something of nothing , onely to show their wit , without any reason or ground that they haue to maintayne it : Who , where , or how , can th●…se things be done so handsomly in all the world , as in the Schooles of Alcala ? Where haue you brauer , or more flourishing wits in the Arts , in Physicke , and D●…uinitie ? Where haue you Colledges better seene and practised in the three principall Languages ? Whence doe there daily proceed so many and so good Students , as from thence ? Where is the like concourse to be found of so many well skill'd in the Arts , who conuersing together like friends and brothers , yet as if they were enemies , are alwayes one against another in the exercise of learning ? Where so many , so good , and such faithfull friends to be had ? Where such good fashion , such good fellowship , such good discipline , such good skill in Musicke , in Armes , in dancing , running , leaping , and throwing the barre , making their wits able , and their bodies agile ? Where doe concurre so many good things together , besides the purenesse of the ayre , the clearnesse of the skie , the temperatenesse of the heauen aboue , and the fertilenesse of the soyle beneath , and aboue all , such a Cathedrall Church , which may iustly be called the Phoenix of the world , for the rare and singular workmanship in that most stately and vnmatchable fabricke ? O my deare Mother Alcala , what shall I say of thee , that may sufficiently expresse thy worth ? Or how , without wronging thee , shall I be silent in thy praise ? I shall doe thee wrong , and yet I cannot doe it . Though it were better for me to hold my peace , for therein I should lesse offend . It was a rare thing , if not a wonder , to see any Scholler so debaux'd , or so wholly giuen ouer to Vice ( were it of gaming , or otherwise ) that would omit the principall end for which he was sent thither , or neglect those good studies , whereunto hee was to apply him-selfe ; for with vs , no greater infamie could befall him , then to be accounted an idle loyterer , and mis-spender of his time . O the sweetnesse of a Schollers life ! You cannot imagine the many pleasures and delights that they take : O how merry doe they make them-selues vpon St. Nicholas day , when they meet to make choyce of some petty little Bishops amongst them ! What sport doe they make with your fresh-men ? how doe they play the waggs with them , putting them vpon a wheele , and twirling them downe into a hollow pit , bring them vp againe laden with snow ? How put a little round rolling pinne betweene the lid of their chests , and the locke , taking forth what they can finger , challenging it as a fee for their entrance ? not a booke of theirs that can escape their hands , no nor their very cloakes that are vpon their shoulders . What a pleasure is it to see them labour and canuase for voyces , to make vp a maior part at the election of their Generall ? How close doe those that are Country-men cling and sticke together , how doe they stickle to make their owne man , euery one striuing to preferre him that is of their owne Shire or Prouince ? How stiffely and how faithfully will they labour in the businesse ? What a quarter and a racket doe they keepe , posting away messengers to this friend , and that friend ; impawning all that they can rapp or wring , till the next returne of the Carryer ; some of their bookes lye in lauander at the Cookes ; some at this Inne , and some at that : Scotus his workes are in pawne at the Bunnoleros , or those that sell Frittars : Aristotles , lye ingaged in the Tauerne , Bartolus , at the Bakers ; Baldus , and all his fellow Civilians , some in one place , some in another : So one thing after another , all goes away ; not sparing so much as the Iacke of male , that lyes betweene our mattresses ; the sword , that is vnder our bed ; the pot-lid , that hangs in the kitchin ; the couers of the powdring tubs , of the pans , and what not ? In what Comfit-makers shop , had not we a pawne and a score , when our credit began to faile ?

In this manner , and with these intertainments , did I merrily passe my time , till I was ready to professe Diuinity . And when I was vpon my last yeare , and ready to proceed Bachelor therein , my sinnes carried me one euening towards How Guzman was with-drawn from his studies . Santa Maria del val ; there are some kinde of Pilgrimages , and other the like places for deuotion , that a man were better breake his legge , and abide at home , then to gad thither . For we often goe thither , not with any intention to giue an almes to the poore , or to powre forth our prayers vnto God , and to praise and thanke him for his benefits ; but all cleane contrary . There we commit a thousand offences against our Lord God , that it were better for vs not onely to breake our legge , but our necke too , and to die in the state of grace . I know , and so doest thou too , why I speake it . This perambulation or station of mine , was the chiefe cause , and principall occasion of my vtter vndoing . Hence rose that terrible storme of my tempestuous life , the destruction of my wealth , and the finall ouer-throw of my credit .

I went out of my lodging , with a purpose onely to visit this holy House : I did so : And at my entring into the Church , I espy'd a company of women , and amongst them some very beautifull and handsome ; according to my wonted custome , I made towards the Font , where the holy-water was : I dipt in my right hand , and that little I tooke out on the tops of my fingers , I sprinkled on my forchead : But hauing my eyes and my feet tending towards that faire herd which you heard me speake of . Not so much as once offering to looke towards the Altar , nor once dreaming or thinking on the Sacrament , I kneeled with one knee on the ground , putting forth my other legge in that manner of posture , as your Fowlers vse to doe , when they lye close to make a shoot . And in stead of crossing and blessing my selfe , I made a hundred loue-signes ; and that I might the better driue these Conies into the net , I went directly towards them ; but before I could come at them , the game was risen ; and going away from thence , they tooke downe through a groue of Alder trees , towards the Riuer side ; and being come to a pretty little greene meadow , they made the grasse their cushions , and so sate them downe . I followed them afarre off , to see where they did quat , and perceiuing that they had there taken vp their rest , and meant to sit by it , for they had now taken out of their sleeues such iunkets as they had brought along with them . And as they were thus preparing for their beuer , faire and softly , and in a sober and ciuill fashion , I drew nearer & nearer vnto them : This good company consisted of a widow-woman , a good honest Hostesse , and two of her daughters , that were more faire and beautifull then Castor and Pollux , besides some other their friends and acquaintance , that were not much inferiour vnto them , as being likewise endowed with those gracefull gifts of nature ; but she whose name was Grace , ( for so was the elder daughter to my Hostesse called ) did so farre-exceed the rest , that they seemed rather her attendants , then her companions ; they were Starres , but my Grace was the Sunne .

I was a man generally well knowne , I had resided in Alcala some seauen yeares and better ; was accounted one of the best Students amongst them , and held to be rich , which was no small addition to my credit ; Attributes , that haue the power to draw the hardest hearts to loue . And these wenches were the buxomest and the wittiest in all the Towne . Now they were beginning to fall to their merendar , or inter-mealary repast , when iesting with them , I beganne to insinuate my selfe , and to close with them ; wherein I was not so crafty , but they were as cunning .

But before I proceede any further , leauing this businesse on these tearmes you see , I must giue you to vnderstand , that what with the charge I was at , for bookes to furnish my Study , for the taking of my Degrees , and for apparell , I , and my moneyes , had in a manner made an euen reckoning . I had some left , but so little , that I was not able therewith to take my farther Degrees , and so enter into holy Orders . And because , before I was to proceede Bachelor of Diuinitie , I must necessarily take Orders , and this was impossible for mee to doe , because I wanted an Ecclesiasticall Benefice , or some Chaplainship to qualifie me ; I had no other shift to helpe my selfe withall , but to haue recourse vnto my father-in-law , and to request his helping hand , with whom I did alwayes communicate my necessities , whose friendship had neuer yet fayled me . Hee did encourage me on in my good courses , by affording me at once his best both aduice and helpe . For little doth hee ( that is o o Quien puede , poco haz●… , quando a conseja , sino remedia . able ) who doth not as well afford vs his hand , as his head ; his helpe , as his Prouerbe . counsell .

Hee told mee , that hee would make a Donation vnto mee of the possessions of my wifes Dowry , saying ; That hee would bestow the same vpon me for the maintaining of a Chaplaine to say Masse for his soule : and that I on the other side , should make a Declaration of the truth , obliging my selfe by bond to returne the same againe , when and as oft , as hee should require it at my hands . Euen in these things also are these Counter-bonds starke nought , being that they take place against that which is established by the Holy Councels , running on so insolently and so impudently , deuoid of the feare of those grieuous penalties and censures , which they incurre by these their Symoniacall Contracts . O good God , how is it possible to cut off the thread whereat this so great a mischiefe hangs , since I cannot reforme this abuse in my selfe .

I kindly accepted of his offer , and gaue him many thankes , for that his good will was such vnto me , that hee would hand in hand walke with me to Hell , to keepe me company .

Shall I here say any thing vnto you concerning this point ? Me-thinkes I heare you say , No : And that I should not meddle any more with matters of Reformation , vnlesse they might doe more good , and worke more amendment then ( for ought you see ) they yet doe . I can doe no more then I can doe . But say ( Friend Guzman ) I could , put that to thy account ; for what is this to me ? Nothing , I assure thee . Doest thou thinke , that thou art the onely man , that is sensible of these things ? that thou art the first that hath found fault with these Abuses ; or that thou shalt be the last that shall complaine of them ? Doe thou talke of that , which concernes thee a little more neerly , and makes more for thy present purpose : For ( if you be remembred ) you left those pretty wenches with the meat in their mouthes ( feasting , and making merry ) and expecting the words that should come from yours . Bring vs backe againe therefore to thy former discourse , and let these things alone , for there will a day come , when my Lady Symonie shall haue her doome .

Thou sayest well , thy demand is reasonable , and I cannot deny it thee . And since that I am so willing to yeeld to thy request , doe me likewise the fauor to pardon this my fault , in falling afresh vpon this subiect .

I stood vpon those tearmes which you haue already heard me tell you , I had past ouer all my Lectures , and in a manner ended all my Exercises , a Chaplainship setled vpon me , to qualifie mee for the taking of Orders , being within three moneths after to take my Degree . This was in February , I was to take my Orders the first Ember-weeke following , and my Degree about the beginning of May .

This pretty Soules sayings and doings , name and actions , were all compact of Grace : and all the Graces being put together , ( should they come vpon comparison ) must fall short of this Grace . For her wit , shee was a Cabinet stored with all manner of pleasant and merry conceits : for her beauty , I know not how to expresse it better then by silencing it : she sang delicately , plaid daintily on the Violl , was wonderfull discreet , had a nimble apprehension , but quicker eyes , wherewith ( me-thought ) shee formed a pretty kinde of chearfull laughter vpon him , towards whom shee was pleased to turne them , so sparkling and cleare were they , and so full both of life and loue . Glancing with them to and fro , hers and mine met , it seeming on the sodai●… , that the visiue beames in both , reconcentrating them-selues in this encounter , by a reciprocall repercussion , strucke home vpon our soules . I knew it was affection in her , and shee was fully perswaded of the like in mee . Shee had rob'd mee of my soule ; and so I told her then , speaking aloud vnto her by my lookes , but not a word of any such matter that came from my mouth . All that I then vttered , was onely this ; That they would bee pleased so farre forth to grace mee , as to make mee worthy their Company , by inuiting mee to bee their Guest . They did so , euery one of them did offer mee a part of their iunkets , and did in a manner inforce mee to receiue this courtesie from their hands .

When I had giuen them thankes for this vn-deserued kindnesse they had showne mee , commending much their faire carriage , I beganne ( with a very good will , though seeming to bee constrained by their command , ) to spread my cloake vpon the ground , and sitting downe thereupon , I tooke my share amongst them , ( which was none of the least ) for they did all striue , who should make most of mee , and bid mee best welcome . I did gratefully acknowledge this their loue , the wine went round , we tooke and gaue healths one from another , as they came about to our turne , and made so good a beuer , that I might very well excuse my supper .

When wee had made an end of eating , a maid-seruant , that waited vpon them , tooke out a Violl , which shee had brought along with her vnder her mantle ; and Grace putting it with a very good grace into my hand , intreated mee to shew my skill thereupon , for that they were minded to dance : Which they did in that manner , with so much comelinesse and arte , and euery way so excellently well , but Grace beyond them all , so gracefully , that I was exceedingly taken therewith , and more inflamed now , then before .

When they were now growne weary , and were willing to rest them-selues a while , deliuering vp the Violl into her hands , from whom I had receiued it , I besought her to grace that Instrument with a Song : which without any kinde of nicety or coynesse , when shee had tuned it , and accorded the same with her voyce , shee performed both so sweetly , as well for the ayring of her notes , as the vowelling of her words , now towring , then melting them at her pleasure : that for the time , shee seemed to haue arrested Time . For before euer wee were aware , shee had no sooner made an end , but Time went away ; and hastning to recouer that hee had lost there , it was instantly night .

And now was it high time for them to hye them home , homewards they goe ; and I in kindnesse would needs accompany them all the way , leading my Loue by the hand . I was somewhat abasht at the first , not knowing how , or where , to beginne to speake vnto her ; till shee taking notice of this eyther my dastardlinesse or feare ; I cannot say , whether carelesly , or of set-purpose , shee tript with her Chapin , but to saue her from falling , I presently opened my armes , into which I louingly receiued her ; and as I was raising her vp , my cheeke hapned ( as if it had beene done by chance ) to leane a little vpon hers : But hauing set her now vpon her feet , ( taking my subiect from thence , ) I sodainly flew backe , beseeching her to excuse that excesse , and that if eyther my selfe , or mine eyes had offended in pressing so neere vpon her , they were for their owne vnmannerlinesse , most willingly ready to receiue such punishment as shee should be pleased to inioyne them . Shee answered mee in that manner , that I was forced to reply . And leading her ( as before ) by the hand , I did gently straine it with mine , wringing it softly hard , that I might not hurt it . Whereat she smiling , said ; For all your wringing it so hard , you shall neuer squeeze any iuyce from thence .

This put a little more mettall into me , and added farther boldnesse to my words : So that faigning that we staid behind , because we were not able to goe any faster , we went discoursing together of our Loues ; I speake onely of mine owne ; for shee laught at all that I sayd , making her selfe merry therewith , the better ( as shee would haue it so to seeme ) to intertaine and passe away the time .

Her mother was a crafty slye subtill thing ; she sought after sonnes-in-Law , and her daughters were desirous of husbands , nor did they mislike of the man : They gaue me line enough , till they had led me along by the nose within their owne doores : whither when we were come , they made mee enter into their priuate chamber , which was very well furnisht ; they brought me a chayre , and would needs haue me sit downe , that I might rest my selfe a while ; and taking out of a Cupboord , neere there at hand , a boxe of Conserues , they brought me with it a iarre of water , which was no more then needed for to quench the fire of that poyson which had so scorcht my heart : but all would not doe . It was now time for mee to take my leaue ; I did so : desiring them to giue mee leaue , that I might now and then receiue the like fauours againe from them : They told me , that they should esteeme it as a great courtesie , that I would bee pleased to command this their house , and to make my selfe no stranger , and that in so doing , they should thereby know that my words did correspond with my workes .

Well , now haue I left them , and am gone . Not so . I am neither gone , nor yet haue I left them . For my heart staid still there with my deare , that she might the better imprint in it the liuely image of her matchlesse beauty . I had already bid them good night : But what a night ( trow you ) was this to me ? How long were the houres ? How short the sleepes ? What a confusion of thoughts ? What distractions of mind ? What a generall warre ? What a battaile of cares ? What a cruell tempest risen on the sodaine , euen in the very Port and Hauen where I thought my selfe so surely anchored , the skie being so cleare , the weather so faire , and the Sea so smooth , as heart could wish ? This made me say to my selfe ; How in so quiet a calme , could such a sodaine storme come vpon me , without perceiuing its approach , or knowing how in the world to prouide any remedy against it ? I am vtterly lost , and vndone for euer ; so vncertaine is my hope of recouery . But now that morning was come , and that I had got me to the Schooles , when I came thither , I knew not whether I were there or no ; nor did I vnderstand any one word that was read vnto me all the while that the Lecture lasted . That done , I returned home , the cloath was laid , dinner brought in , I sate downe , and offering to eate , my meat would not goe downe , my morsels remained as it were frozen within my mouth , and seemed so carelesse in all that I did , that it wrought amazement in my fellow-Students , and admiration in our Tutor , who thought with him-selfe , that this was but an induction to some most grieuous insuing sicknesse . Nor was he therein deceiued , for this was the disease that afterwards wrought my death . He askt me what I ayled ? I knew not what answer to make him ; onely I told him , That my heart did fore-bode some great mis-fortune , that was comming towards me ; for euer since yesterday , my thinkes I feele it sunke downe as it were into my body , and so shrunke together , that I find my selfe in a manner without a soule . All is Lead and lumpishnesse with me , that I know not what to thinke of it .

He told me that I must not be a Mendoçino , nor be so superstitious as to admit such idle toyes to my imagination , nor to let such abusing illusions to come within me , but to keepe them off at armes-end ; for this ill ( said he ) which you presage vnto your selfe , is nothing else but the abundance of some ill humour in the body , which will quickly be remoued .

Now , for that I already knew that my malady , Nullis erat medicabilis herbis , was not to be cured by any herbes , or other medicinable drugges , I dissembled the businesse , and that I might not manifest the misfortune that was likely to befall me , I sayd vnto him ; it may be so Sir , and I hope it shall be so , but in the meane while it paines me much .

I rose from boord , but not from dinner , for I had eaten nothing . And thence got mee to my chamber , where I was so oppressed with sorrow , that suffering my selfe to fall downe vpon my bed , wrapping my mouth and eyes in my pillow , I powred forth teares in abundance , burying my sighes within the stuffing thereof . What with this and the desire that I had to see the Physician of my soules health , I found my selfe somewhat eased : So putting on my cloake , and putting off my Lecture , I went home to her house . I may not omit onely in two words to tell you , That there is not any exercise , but desires a continuance thereof , wherein to faile , though neuer so little , more then ordinary , is like to the breaking of a stich in a mans stockin , which if it be not taken vp in time , will rauell out all the rest .

With this Lecture that I lost , I lost the benefit of all my former tearmes , and with them my selfe . For one after another I left off to continue them , not caring a rush for them . Loue had now matriculated me in his Schoole , Grace was my Rector , her grace my Tutor , and her will my exercise . I did now desire to heare no other Lectures , but those shee read to me , nor any other directions , saue what her eyes taught me . I beganne in ioy , but ended in teares . I beg'd in iest of them a bit of their beuer , but I found in earnest , how ( going crosse my throat ) I was choaked with this contrary morsell . Besides , I was poysoned therewith , for it had quite taken my vnderstanding from me , hauing now beene bereft thereof for the space of three moneths and more , it being much pittied , but more condemned in me , that one that had beene heretofore so studious , and so famous a Scholler for his time , as there were few better in the Vniuersity ; should now when hee was come to the vp-shot , roue thus at randome , losing both him-selfe , and that good opinion which the world had of him .

The Rector , when he had notice hereof , taking compassion of mee , sought to apply some remedy to cure me of this my disease ; but therein he rather did me hurt then good ; for seeing my selfe so hardly set vpon on all sides , but much more oppressed with mine owne proper passion , not hauing any power of resistance , I burst forth into open rebellion , following my vnruly appetite . The bones of reason , which like so many props , should haue seru'd to strengthen my weaker vnderstanding , were all broken , and so strangely split and shiuered in sunder , that there is no hope of euer setting them together againe .

Now our Loues went on amaine ; the fauours afforded me , great ; the hopes , not small ; for it was left to my choice , whether I would haue her to wife , or no. Let vs now ( my masters ) change places ; and let him that is the wisest amongst you take mine : let him be shut vp , as I was , in Loues strongest prison ; let him haue such iust cause as I had , to yeeld my selfe captiue vnto him ; let him be croft and thwarted in his designes , all things conspiring together , to hinder the execution of his desires ; then let him sit downe and giue me counsaile . For that is the man that I would hearken vnto . I knew no better meanes for my good , I left all other for this ; for that I thought this would be my best remedy . Her mother offered me her house , and with it all that she had . Shee was a woman that had good credit in her kind of trading , and had good and quicke returnes , she gained wherewithall to maintaine both the backe and the belly , she made exceeding much of me , shee was ready vpon all occasions to serue me , I could not imagine more kindnesse then she was willing to doe me ; she kept me neat , sweet and handsome , and made that reckning and respect of me , as Lord and Master of all . I thought this world would still haue lasted ; I sought to auoid the venome of euill tongues , but all in vaine ; for they had raised that already of me , which if it had beene true , perhaps I might not haue miscarried . Pardon me ( Gentlemen ) I am now a married man , and there is no more to be said of it . Is not this an ill accompt which I haue giuen you of so many yeares studies , so much good learning , and being vpon the point of taking Orders , and to attaine to some degree in Schooles , that I might at least haue beene able to haue read another day Lectures in the open Schooles , as publike Professor , and Doctor of the Chayre : which might haue beene easie for me to haue done , considering the good conceit they had of me . And being come now to the height of all my labours and paines-taking , and when I was to haue receiued the reward of them , and to take mine ease after all this toyle , the stone rolled downe , and I was forced like Sisiphus , to beginne the world anew , and to fall afresh to my worke . Doe thou therefore consider that now , which I then so often thought vpon .

O how often doth God put a spoake in our wheele ! How doth he crosse our designes , making them to proue vaine and fruitlesse ! For the Altar being now made ready , the wood laid vpon it , and vpon it Isaac , the sword drawne out , the arme lifted vp on high , and now letting it fall , to strike the stroke ; euen then , and not till then , was it hindred in its execution .

O Guzman , why didst thou sit vp so late anights to thy booke ? Why wast thou so diligent at thy studies ? Why didst thou rise so early in the mornings ? Why didst thou continue so long in the Schooles ? So many Acts , so many Degrees , so many pretensions , as thou hadst now on foot , what is become of them all ? what good will they doe thee ?

I haue already told you , that the courses which I tooke in my childhood , came to end in the carrying of a basket ; and now these of my more manly years , to make their mansion in an Inne , or common Victualling-house . And God grant my troubles may here haue an end , and that my foot may be once fixed .

CHAP. V.

Guzman de Alfarache , leaues off his studies ; he goes to liue at Madrid ; hee carries his wife with him ; from whence they were both banished .

HAuing ●…apt from a Bachelor of Diuinity , into the degree of a Master of prophane Loue ; it is now to bee supposed that I am become a Licentiat ; and hauing already so farre proceeded therein , I may with your good licence ( as a true professor thereof ) be permitted to speake so much as I know concerning the same . For , out of the good experience that I haue had thereof , I dare boldly boast my selfe to be one of the best Proficients that was euer bred vp in the Schoole of Loue . If we should goe about to define it ( so many hauing said so much of it ) it were but to repeat that Lesson , which hath already beene said ouer a thousand times and more . Loue then is , Totum in toto , all in all : And so contrary in its effects , that the more we say thereof , the lesse we shall be vnderstood . Yet will wee shoote one arrow amongst the rest that haue endeuoured to hit this marke , and say something of that whereof so many haue spoken .

Loue is the prison of Folly , borne of Idlenesse , bred vp by Selfe-will and Money , and maintained with Filthinesse , Vncleannesse , and Dishonesty : It is the A discourse of Loue . excesse of a bruitish and beastly desire ; most subtill and piercing , making its way through the eyes to the heart : It is that poysoned shaft , deliuered from the hand of the Archer , which neuer stayes till it come to its Center . It is a guest , whom with a great deale of earnestnesse , we our selues inuite , but being once receiued into our house , is not so easily put out . It is a childe that longs for euery thing it sees , fantasticall , and full of Apish trickes ; it is an old doting foole , feeble and decrepit . It is a sonne that will not pardon his owne father ; and a father which will mis-vse his owne sonne . It is a God that hath no mercie , a secret enemie , a feigned friend , a blind but sure shooter , weake to vndergoe any paines , and yet as strong as Death . He obserues no law , nor is he gouerned by reason ; he is impatient , suspitious , iealous , reuengefull , and a sweet tyrant . They paint him blind , because he keepes neither meane nor measure , distinction or election , order or counsaile , constancy or modesty , but euermore erres . They giue him wings , to show his lightnesse , in apprehending that , which is beloued by vs , by which he bringeth vs to an vnfortunate end . So that onely he that goes blindly to worke , speeds best ; and he that lightly wooes , likely winnes the wench . And though these , and such as these , bee the effects of Loue , yet for to bring them to passe , ere euer we can execute them , he will , that we shall want patience in our hopes , feare in the hazarding of our persons , wit in our words , modesty in our demands , iudgement in making our choyce , a bridle to restraine our inconsiderate actions , and consideration to free vs from dangers .

I fell in loue at the first sight , I was taken with a looke , the darts that flew from forth those her eyes , comming so thicke , and with that force vpon mee , that I presently yeelded thereupon , and became her Captiue . Nor was transcursion of time , needfull in this case , as some would necessarily inferre , which affirmation of theirs , I hold to bee an error . For , euer since the fall of our first parents , with that Leauen of theirs , was the whole lumpe and masse of mankind made sowre , and corrupted with these their hereditary vices ; the frame of this humane horologe , was so broaken , and put out of order , that there was not one whole wheele left , to answer one another , nor any spring remaining , whereby to giue it motion : But was so vtterly spoiled , so rent and torne in pieces , and so wholly out of all frame and order , as if it had beene a cleane contrary thing , so differing was it now , from that first setled estate , wherein God had created it ; the alteration of this its truer course , arising from mans disorderly disobedience . From hence , grew that blindnesse in his vnderstanding , that forgetfulnesse in his memory , that defect in his will , that disorder in his appetite , that deprauednesse in his Actions , that deceit in his senses , that weaknesse in his strength , and those paines and torments , in his greatest delights , and pleasures . A cruell squadron of sore and fierce enemies ; who , as soone as God hath infused our soules into our bodies , incompassing vs on euery side , violently set vpon vs ; and so hotly assaile vs with the sweet enticements of sin , faire promises , and the false apparances of foule and filthy pleasures , that they ouer-throw all goodnesse in vs , and so taint and corrupt our soules , that they put them quite out of that good course , for which they were created . So that it may be said of the soule , that it is composed of two contrary parts , the one rationall and diuine ; and the other , of naturall corruption . And forasmuch as the flesh , on that side whereto it inclines , is weake , fraile , and so full of imperfection , ( sinne hauing so wholly infected it cleane throughout ) hence is it come to passe , that imperfection and disorder , is as it were naturall vnto vs . And such and so great is this extreame , that man cannot account any conquest Fortior est qui se , qua●… qui fortissima vincit 〈◊〉 . greater then the subduing of his passions . Great is his courage , whosoeuer he be , that can resist them , and bring them vnder , in regard of that mortall warre , and infernall enmity , which is , and still will be , betweene our Reason and our Appetite . For our Appetite perswadeth vs vnto that , which is most agreeable to our nature , to that which doth best like and please vs , and to things of that quality , which we take pleasure to treat of , and haue a desire to obtaine them . Whereas on the contrary , Reason is like vnto a Schoole-master , who , that she may the better correct vs , goes alwayes with a rod of reprehension in her hand , condemning the ill which wee commit . But wee , like little children , play the Tr●…ants , and flye from this Schoole , for feare of correction when wee doe amisse , and runne a-mouching eyther to our Aunts house , or our grandfathers , where wee are made much of , and suffered to play the wantons .

Thus often ( if not alwayes ) Reason remaineth ( which ought not so to be ) in Reason many times made subiect to our sensuall Appetite . vassallage and slauery to our Appetite : Which when it hath once gotten so great a power and dominion ouer vs , that of filthy Loue , being so vehement , so violent , so powerfull , so proper to this our being , so solely , and wholly ours , so sutable to our disposition , so glued and wedged to our nature , that to breathe , or liue , is not more proper vnto vs ; it must of necessitie follow , that it is the hardest passion to represse , the terriblest enemy that wee haue to deale withall , and who with most strength and greatest force comes vpon vs , assaults vs , and subdues vs .

And albeit , it be true , that Reason , holding ( as shee doth ) her ancient place of preheminence , is wont sometimes to hinder , by her great wisedome and valour , the sodaine working of a looke ( although it haue the power of potent causes , to assist and further the same ) that it may not easily , and as it were in a trice , rob vs of our will , before wee are aware , putting a man in an instant besides himselfe : yet ( as already hath beene said ) for as much as the Appetite and the Will , are such sure marke-men , so free , so Lord-like , being neuer yet taught to obey , nor acknowledge any Superiour , it is an easie thing for them , hauing Loue on their side , to worke whatsoeuer effects , and in such forme and manner , as shall seeme best to stand with their owne liking .

And because likewise there is not any thing , which doth not naturally appeterc bonum , desire that which is good ; and that euery action which wee vndergoe , is in regard of that good , which represents it selfe vnto vs , or that happinesse wee finde to be in it , wee euermore desire to obtaine the same , and ioyne it vnto vs , side ( as they say ) to side : nay , wee would ( if it were possible ) out of this our earnest desire , conuert it , and incorporate it into our owne substance .

From hence then , this Conclusion may be gathered ; That , for a man to Men may sodainly fall in loue . fall in loue , there is no such force or necessitie in it , that there should some distance of time interpose it selfe , that some discourse ensue thereupon , or that there be any election or deliberation had in the matter ; but that vpon the very first veiw , that onely , sole , single , and primary sight , there may ioyntly concurre in both , a correspondencie , or consonancie , or ( as we here in Spaine commonly vse to call it ) Vna confrontacion de sangre , a confronting , or conformitie of the blood , wherin the starres by a particular influence , are wont to worke , and doe often moue vs thereunto .

For , being that these beames doe dart themselues by the eyes from the heart , they take infection from that which they finde before them , especially if those they encounter withall , be like vnto their owne , and returning presently backe againe to the very selfe-same place , from whence they were sent forth , as they draw these in with them to the heart , so doe they portrait and ingraue therein that fayre obiect , which they saw and desired . And because it seemeth to the Appetite , to be a noble pledge , and well worthy the buying , at any rate or price whatsoeuer , esteeming it as a thing of infinite value ; it presently enters into treaty , how he may come to inioy the same , freely offring for it , and with a very good will , the greatest treasure and riches , that hee hath , which is his Liberty , his heart being made prisoner by that Lord , whom himselfe admitted into his bosome .

And in that very instant , that this bonum , or this thing , be it what it will bee , comes to be beloued , and entertained by vs , it is likewise to be considered , that man doth forthwith apply his vnderstanding to esteeme it as its summum bonum , or chiefest happinesse : and so desiring to haue it conuerted into himselfe , is himselfe conuerted into that which he so much desireth .

Whence it commeth to passe , that those very selfe-same effects , which may be wrought by length of time , getting ground vpon vs by continuation , consideration , and conuersation : so also they may be occasioned in that instant , that this contentment , or pleasure , that wee take in that good , which wee in our imagination , figure and fashion to our selues , is caused in vs . For , in regard that wee know not , or ( to speake in a truer kinde of language ) will not hinder the course thereof , nor make any resistance against it ; as also in respect of the corruption of our nature , debilitie of our reason , captiuitie of our liberty , and the weaknesse of our forces , dazled , if not blinded , with this light , wee want wings to flye from it ; and like men that are hood-winkt , runne headlong on to our owne ruine : it seeming decent and fitting for vs , to yeeld our selues presently thereunto , as to a thing that is naturall vnto vs .

And this is so proper vnto man , as light is to the Sunne , cold to Snow , heat to Fire ; as it is to heauy things to descend , and to those that are ayrie to ascend ; without giuing way to the vnderstanding , or any power to free-will , who inioying their priuiledges , might exercise their office ; which are now in subiection to the Will , which remaines now no more free , so that in stead of making resistance , wee furnish the enemie with weapons against our selues . Iust so , doth it succeed with Reason and Understanding , in regard of the Will. For whereas in that first age , whilest wee stood in the state of innocency , Of Reason , Vnderstanding , and the Will . they were absolute Lords , and like Kings , had all things vnder their subiection , and did conserue and keepe in peace , all that fayre and goodly fabricke . After mans first sinne , they remained slaues , and were made obedient to the Will , and forced to become the ministers and executioners of this her cruell Tyranny . So that now , our passions and affections hauing got the vpper-hand , and wee being furthered and led along with a blinde and depraued vnderstanding , and hungring and thirsting after our owne lustfull appetites , wee doe inconsiderately debase our manly brests , bowing them to the ground , to lappe of those waters , which may please the palate of our lustfull pleasures .

Wee flye like hooded Falcons , one while towring to the vppermost Regions of the ayre ; another while taking through the thickest woods , ignorant of any future danger , nor fearing the assured mischiefe that must light vpon vs . So that few doe stand vpon this distance of time , which is set before them , neyther doe they preuise , or prouide for after-claps ; or if they would , Loue will not suffer them so to doe , so impatient is this littlegreat-God , of delayes . And these the like effects did he worke vpon me .

I was now turn'd marryed man the second time , and so well and happily to mine owne liking and content , that I did verily perswade my selfe , Que nunca por mi se començara el toçino del paray●…o , That I should neuer haue Prouerbe . fallen from so great a happinesse , and that I should still haue continued the happiest man in the world . I did not then consider with my selfe , nor did it once enter into my imagination , that this holy Ordinance , ordayned by God in Paradise , I should solely and wholly haue sought after it for the seruice and glory of God , the augmentation of his Church , and the continuation of mine owne Species or kinde , by a lawfull meanes of succession . But these , were the least of my thought , I did meerly intend mine owne pleasure and delight . It was her beauty , and not my duty , that I minded . Much lesse , did I giue place to the Understanding , that hee might aduise mee to to that which hee knew was best for mee : nor indeed was I willing to hearken to his good counsaile . I did shut mine eyes against those things , that should haue done me good . I did put Reason away from mee : I ill intreated Truth , for shee told mee , that marrying with a fayre woman , many cares must necessarily offer them-selues vnto mee , for feare shee should become common .

In conclusion , being ill aduised , I pursued to please mine owne humour , an ill-desired-good : I was blinded with those her naturall gifts , and bewitched with her grace and beauty ; things , as proper to my Spouse as they were without any artifice or dawbing . Hee erres , who thinkes that any thing can seeme well that is an artificiall composition , or a borrowed beauty : for this fayre tincture that is giuen to the face , is but a false and counterfeit plaistring ; and when that dawbing is taken off , that foulnesse that was there before , returnes afresh , and becomes more fowle . Prouerbe .

I liu'd as merrily as the day was long : And hee , a a Los , que no gozan de suegro , no gazan de cosa buena . that is not blest with a Mother-in-law , knowes not what a blessing he wants . Shee vs'd mee as if I had beene her owne sonne , seeking by all meanes possible how shee might please me , and giue me content . There was not any Guest , that brought a good morsell of meat into the house , whereof I had not a part . And if it came not in that wayes , why then her purse should pay for it , buying the best the market would afford .

And as my wife brought me but a small dowry , so did shee take vnto herselfe Wiues with great porcions looke for large maintenance . the lesse liberty of speech , and had the lesse cause to put me to vnnecessary and superfluous expence , and to demand a thousand idle toyes of mee which chargeable fooleries , your wiues that bring great portions , too-too often put their husbands vnto . Shee was young , and so young , that I easily wrought her to mine owne will , and could bowe and bend her which way I list my selfe . It was a pretty flexible foole , and was willing to be rul'd by mee .

I had got me kinsfolke , who thought them-selues much honoured and graced by my person , because they knew I was euery way superiour vnto them . For hee that shall linke him-selfe in alliance with those that are of greater ranke and qualitie then him-selfe , shall neuer lacke Lords , to serue ; Iudges , to feare , and Princes , to whom hee must pay perpetuall tribute . But my Mother-in-law Guzman his bappinesse . was tributary to me , & my Sister-in-law was my slaue , my Spouse did adore me , and all the house did serue mee . Neuer at any time , as now , was I so free from taking thought for any thing , or from the troubles and cares of this world . For I thought vpon nothing , but eating , drinking , and sleeping , and to passe away the time merrily , without being subiect to anothers controlment , nor lyable to any payments , not so much as the value of one farthing , eyther for house-rent , or to the King . All did dance after my pipe , and did foot it as I would haue them But this dance was the blinde-mans Measure , and my selfe that led them , was the blindest amongst them .

They say of Circes , that inticing strumpet , that with her wicked sorceries , and diuellish inchantments , she turned those men into beasts , with whom shee conuersed . Some shee turned into Lyons ; others , into Wolues , Boares , Beares , Serpents , and other the like bruitish shapes : but withall , left them their vnderstanding quicke and souud ; for in that particular shee did not touch them . But this other whore ( which is our blinde Will ) takes a cleane contrary course ; for , leauing vs the formes of men , shee bestowes on vs the vnderstanding of beasts . And ( as I haue said heretofore ) I neuer saw any alteration of fortune , which was not accompanyed with some disasters , which were neuer presupposed , The mutable effects of fortune . or once dreamt of before . And alwayes at the first shee makes show of a great deale of loue and kindnesse , that to our greater griefe shee may tumble vs downe , from that height of happinesse , wherin wee now supposed wee safely stood . For that which grieues , vs most in these our worldly losses , is the recordation the possession of them . So that the more ( in inioying them ) was our happinesse , the more sensible ( in losing them ) is our misery . Shee turn'd her wheele , against me , my wife , and all our whole house .

My father-in-law ( whose soule is now in heauen ) though he were an Inne-keeper , yet I can assure you he was a good honest man : for they are not all of them Guzmans father-in-law , what manner of man he was . knaues , they doe not all picke their guests pockets , rob their mailes , nor peruse their cloak-bags : and there are many of them that doe not will their Ostlers to cozen the beasts of their prouender ; nor will them-selues pinch their guests in their dyet , and yet make them pay deare for it . For these are things which appertaine more properly vnto women , for that they are naturally more sparing and solicitous about these things , then men , and more curious in the ordering of their prouision . And if there be any such false dealing amongst them , the fault was none of theirs , nor was any such thing to be presumed from my father - or mother-in-law ; for they were good honest plaine people , bred in the mountainous Country , as good Gentle-folk , and as well descended as Cid him-selfe , saue that through their mis-fortune and pouerty , they were forced to follow that course of life : which shall plainly appeare vnto you by that which ensueth . For he being so honest a man as he was , such a friend to his friends , and naturally giuen to doe other men good , he trusted one of his acquaintance with a certaine rent of Tithes : some would say , that he spent all this Barley and Wheat in his house , but I doe not beleeue it , being it fell out so ill with him ; but did rather lose thereby , preferring his credit before his profit . For as it was afterwards told me , both by my mother-in-law , my wife , and my Sister-in-law , hee was a man that lou'd to fare well , and that his table was alwayes well furnisht , his vessels were fill'd with rich Wines , he made much of himselfe , and led as merry a life , as cup and can could make him : for there are a certaine kinde of men whose God is their belly .

I knew a good-fellow in Seuill , that was iust such another for all the world A tale of a poore fellow in Seuill , that lou'd to fare well . as hee was , though hee liu'd not in that credit as hee did ; who pickt out a poore liuing by copying out of Sermons , euery sheet that he wrote , yeelding him halfe a Royall . This mans helpe my selfe had occasion once to vse , for to copy out a certaine Processe for mee at home in mine owne house , and hee hauing staid somewhat long after dinner , before he returned againe to his worke , I demanded of him why he came no sooner : And he told me that hee was faine to goe a great wayes off to fetch his dinner . But looking a little better vpon him , and beholding him to be a man , made of Taylors shreds , composed of a company of patches , and those all to bee tatterd and torne , not hauing a ragge to his taile , a shooe to his foot , a cloake to his backe , nor a hat to his head , but as poore as poore might be ; I imagined with my selfe , that for his owne ease he might or ought to haue dined in some poore victualing-house , or the next Tauerne , that was at hand . Whereupon , I said vnto him , Are there no Cookes shops , or victualing-houses here-abouts , that you are forced to goe so farre ? Hee told me ; Sir , I am a poore man ; I eate that I get , and I get what I can , that I may liue the better . To that Bodegou , or victualing-house whither I goe , they are acquainted with my dyet ; and know that I will haue to my dinner a pound of the best mutton that is to be bought in the marker , and another of Kid : the sawce thereunto being Rocket and Sugar . And this is my fashion of feeding for the winter : for the sommer a little thing contents me , a morsell of v●…ale , or a chicken , ot some such light meate .

But to goe on with my former discourse , This friend and acquaintance of my Guzmans miserable estate . father-in-lawes , beginning to sinke in his estate , and dying within a few dayes after , when the day of payment was come , they came vpon my mother-in-law with an Execution , by vertue wherof they ceazed on all that was in the house , and carried away with them whatsoeuer they found there , & I was afraid that they would haue taken me and my wife along with them , as reckning vs a part of the houshold-goods . But though they did not , yet was it little better , and in a manner almost all one : for they tooke vs by the shoulders , and thrust vs out of doores , that we might not hinder them in the execution of their office , or keepe a coyle and stirre with them about the carrying away of the goods .

We saw ourselues , like those that are rob'd by pyrates , rifled of all that wee had . We made shift to with-draw our selues , as well as we could , to a neighbors house ; and because the creditors would make the best benefit that they could of the Inne , being willing that they should haue it , that would pay most for it : there were not those wanting , that did seeke to out-bid one another ; for Prouerbe . there is no man so great an enemy vnto thee , b b Quien es de tu officio esse es tu enemigo . as he that is of thine owne trade . In these kind of men , there is no enuy wanting ; they doe repine at anothers prosperity , and secke to cut each others throat .

This Inne , had beene heretofore in very good credit ; so that they went out-vying one another , ( euery one striuing to haue it ) still out-bidding my mother-in-law , who was likewise a suter vnto them , that shee might rent it of them , for that she , and her daughters , had beene there bred vp , and had continued therein so long , which made her the more desirous to hold it , and to offer more for it then it was worth . In conclusion , we had possession againe of the house , in despight of all our enemies , but so inhaunced in the rent ( for the which me may thanke others malice ) and other by-payments , that were to goe out of it , that we were scarce able to find our selues bread and pilchards . For the Rent , like a Sponge , did sucke vp all our gaines , and drunke vp so much of our commoditie , that we were ready ( being thus ouer-rented ) to perish for want of food .

When I saw my selfe brought to so low ad ebbe , I beganne to bethinke my selfe , purposing to make vse of my Philosophy , and apply my selfe to the studying of Physicke , thinking to thriue by that course , and to picke a good liuing Guzman studies physicke . out of it ; but it would not fadge with me , nor was it possiblefor me to doe my selfe good that way ; howbeit I had spent some time therein , to make triall what I could doe : Some little profit I made of it , by reason of those good grounds which I had from the Metaphysicks : For it is a vsuall saying with vs , That , Ubi definit Philosophus , ibi incipit Mêdicus ; & vbi Medicus , ibi Theologus : Where the Philosopher ends , there the Physitian beginnes ; and where the Physitian , there the Diuine . The maine drift of my desire was , to see if I could make a shift to rub out , and by some meanes or other to sustaine my selfe ; but all was lost labour , howbeit that I might the better bring the world about , I permitted gaming , visites , conuersations , and other impertinencies in my house , all which did me more harme then goods I c c The Spanish phrase is , Huy del peregil , y naçia me en la frente . sought to shunne Charibdis , and fell vpon Scilla . And thinking to mend , I mar'd my fortune . So seeing mine owne error , and perceiuing at last , that none of all these would come to take fire , I beganne to consider with my selfe , that some dainty pleasing bayte , that was sweet to swallow , would doe the deed , and proue like vnto your Comine-seeds , which being hung vp in a little linnen bag in some Douehouse , The property of Comin-seed . will onely with the sent thereof , cause the Pigeons to flocke vnto it . But herein that happened vnto me , which commonly befalleth your Comfit-makers ; when as the Flies with the very sauour of his sweet meates , resort in swa●…mes to his shop , and there glut them-selues with feeding vpon these his pleasing confections .

At the first I dissembled it a little , and would not seeme to take notice of any such thing ; for giue you but neuer so little way to a woman , slacken but the Women apt to take too much liberty . line that holds her in , and nothing in the world will lash out more , or assume more liberty to it selfe . Lay but the raynes on her necke , and seeke not to hold her in , there is no ho with her ; then shall you see what friskals shee will fetch , leape , fling , and flie out , that no ground shall hold her . She will take hedge , or ditch , or any thing ; nothing comes amisse , though it be to the breaking of her owne , and her riders neck .

All things ( as it is with old cloathes ) grew worse and worse with vs , wee Guzman driuen to base courses , and vpon what reason . did eate , but ( God he knowes ) how little it was , to so hard a scantling , and to such a poore allowance , were our hungry bellies limited . But there was no limitation put to our lawlesse liberties , they had now broken all bounds of modesty , they had lost their former sure footing , and had runne them-selues out of all order , without any feare or respect , either to God or man ; so that my reputation lay now in the suds , our honour gone to ruine , our house , all on a flaming fire ; and all this were we faine to suffer , for want of food . My mother-in-law Want , a great enemie to goodnesse . was content to winke at it , my sister she solicited the businesse , my wife was a willing worme , and these three playing booty , they made their game the surer . My mouth was bung'd vp , I durst not speake , because it was I that had set open the doore to three , and intertained all occasions ; which if I had not done , we might all haue staru'd .

I past a while with this , ( still seeming ignorant of what was done ) and taking no notice of the meale , that fell into the Mill-chest ) but the tolle was so poore , that wee could not liue by that kinde of grinding in Alcala . The Students were able to part but with a little ; for their allowances were so small , that they could not maintayne them-selues and another ; and there was not one amongst them all , that was capable to be made a Nominatiue to rule a Verbe in order of Construction , and whereunto a man might haue reference and recourse , when things are necessarily required to be ioyned together . But to fare ill , to eat little , and that late , and to part with so much pleasure , for so little profit , that I should see my selfe ( like a person that suffereth ) put still in the Accusatiue Case , I could by no meanes endure it ; nor was I willing to giue entertaynment in my house to these needy Schollers , who are more for the Vocatiue then Prouerbe . the Datiue . I had cast vp my reckoning , and found , that the d d No puede ser el co●…vo mas negro , que las alas . Crow could not be blacker then his Wings : The harme is already done : The greatest Gudgeon is already swallowed downe : Things cannot be well worse , then they are . My honour is already imp●…wned , the lesser euill is to sell it outright ; the profit here is small , the infamie great ; the Students crafty , and full of tricks ; and victuals hard to come by : So that now it was not onely fitting to change our bowles , but to doe the same speedily . It goes ill with vs one way , and worse another ; and therefore wee must apply our selues to that , which may make most for our profit . And being that something must be lost by the bargaine , let vs not be like the botcher , that dwells at the corner of the street , who workes all day for nothing , and then throwes away his needle and thread in a rage . We must not hurle all away with a curse , but carry things in that manner , that we may haue some-thing remayning to helpe vs at a pinch , at least as is necessarie for our victum , and vestitum ; our food , and apparell . Let vs leaue this valley of teares , before the long vacation come , when all is in a calme , and no winde stirring , to blow vs any good . Let vs leaue this vnhallowed people , from whom the greatest things of value , that can be gotten , is a six-penny pye , or two rolls of manjar blanco , and when they doe bestow these things , they goe not out of the house , till they haue eaten the better halfe thereof them-selues . If their Mothers send them a barrell of Cordova Oliues , they thinke they doe vs a great kindnesse , if they giue vs a little plate-full of them , and that they make our eyes water●… , if not cleane put them out , with two smoakie sausages of the mountaine . No , no , there is no such matter , it cost vs more then so . I will not sell my honour so cheape to Schollers , where there is nothing to be got , but halfe-penny loafes , and hat-bands .

I knew well enough what had past in Court , and how the world went there : There had I seene many men , who had no other trade to liue by , Wenches haue better trading in Court , then in the Vniuersitie . nor any other in-come to maintayne them , but a faire face , and that they would often take in stead of a Dowry ; for with them it was held to be a mine of infinite treasure , labouring and 〈◊〉 to marry with women of such worth and credit , that were cunning in their Art , and knew what did belong to the businesse , and could tell without teaching , where their shooe did wring them . I was also acquainted with those their subtle and cunning tricks which they made vse of , that they might not be obliged to that , which was vnbeseeming them . For when the chamber was occupyed , and that they had a friend with them , whom they were willing to entertaine , they would either take downe the Lettice , or set a jarr in the window , or a shooe , or some one thing or other , whereby their husbands might know that they were to passe by the doore , and not to come in for feare of interrupting their sport . But at noone , the field was left open vnto them , they might then freely enter into their owne houses , where they should finde the table well furnisht , the meat good , and neatly drest , and needed not to take any great care to keepe the chayre warme ; for he that sent in this prouision , would come thither in person to passe away the time , and to make merry a-while with them . And a-nights , when the Aue-Mary-bell had gone , and that deuotion ended , they would returne home againe , they had their supper ready prouided for them , then would they goe to sleepe alone by them-selues , till that the houre was come , that their wiues were to come to bed to them , it sometimes so falling out , that they would stay away till it were broad-day , for that they had occasion to goe forth to visit some of their neighbours .

In a word , these good men , and their wiues , did liue in that cunning fashion , that without suffering them-selues to be vnderstood , either by word , or by deed , they both knew very well how to play their parts , and what each of them had to doe . And these kinde of kinde husbands , were well respected by their wiues , and honoured with many Visites , in another gates fashion , then they were , who did walke without this disguise : Nay , their wiues would be earnest to haue them abroad with them , calling and carrying them along with them to those feasts and bankets , whereunto they were inuited , eating together at one boord , and sleeping together in one bed .

I knew one , who because a Gallant , that lou'd and maintaynd his wife , had setled his affection vpon another woman , made no more adoe , when he heard A base part of a Wittall . of it , but goes presently in all haste to looke him out : And when hee had found where he was , he comes vnto him , and asks him , what fault hee could finde in his wife , that hee had forsaken her companie : Which question he had no sooner put vnto him , but hee sodainly claps within him , and stab'd him twice in the bodie , but ( as God would haue it ) he did not dye of those his wounds .

Such as these goe to a Bodegon for their dinner , for their wine to a Tauerne , and to the market with a basket . But those that are of a more honourable and noble disposition , it will well agree with them , that they leaue the house free for all commers , going them-selues in the meane while to see a Comedie , or to get them abroad to play a bout or two at billiards , or some other the like pastimes , especially when their Commissions are out . I would not for any thing doe that , which some doe ; who , when in the presence of their wiues , others begin to commend these and these good parts , in such , or such a courted Dame , will neuer leaue till they make their wiues discouer theirs there before them , preferring and praysing them to be farre better then any that they can show . But for a tacite permission , without any kinde of submission , or yeelding thereunto of mine , I did no way dislike it , but was well contented with it .

I got my bagg and baggage together , made vp that little that I had into a fardle , all which a man might in a manner haue shut vp in a Snailes shell ; for one little olde worme-eaten chest contain'd all the houshold stuffe and wealth that I had ; which being put into a Cart , my wife and I sitting thereupon , we marched on to Madrid , singing all the way as we went , e e Tres anades madre , passan por aqui , Mal penan à mi. It is an ancient and common song in Spaine : And when men trauaile merrily on the way , and laugh and be Iouiall , we vsually say , That they goe singing , Tres anades madre , Three ducks &c. Covarr . pag. 67. Tres anades madre . Before we came thither , I began to cast vp my reckonings with my selfe , and when I had well thought vpon the businesse , and made vp my account , I said to my selfe ; I carry here along with me a morsell for a King , new fruit new , fresh ware , fresh , neuer seene , nor handled before : And therefore I will sell deare , and set what price on 't I list my selfe ; I will make mine owne market : I shall not faile to meet with some one or other , who that he may supply my turne , will employ mee abroad in some profitable businesse ; and a secret molestation may well be dissembled , and fairely borne withall , especially when it shadowes it selfe vnder the cloake of friendship : So that , what with sparing the expences of my house , and what by getting other wayes , I shall quickly grow rich ; I shall once more come to be Master of a Familie , and to haue an honest house of mine owne , wherein I may be able to lodge six or seauen good guests , which will yeeld mee such reasonable profit , that wee shall not want wherewithall to liue , but be supplyde with all such things as are necessarie for vs . I am priuie to mine owne good parts , and know how fit I am for any imployment of importance , wherewith they may trust mee , and how surely they may relie vpon me . In businesses abroad , I shall be carefull and diligent ; and at home in my house , patient and quiet . I will vse all the meanes I can to gaine my selfe credit , and to grow into a good opinion with the world : And when the measure of my desires shall be full , and come to its height , I will bend my courses to matters of greater moment , and leaue off my trading ; nor shall any other by-occasions necessarily with-draw me from these my designes .

My wife entred into Madrid in the best cloathes shee had , hauing a gallant hat on her head , set forth with a faire plume of feathers of diuers colours , but the deuill a lot of any thing else that we had , that was worth any thing , excepting onely our Ghitterne , which wee still carryed with vs wheresoeuer wee went .

We were no sooner come to Court , but presently in an instant , before wee could set our feet on the ground , the fame of our welcome to Towne had spread it selfe abroad , her beauty had mustered together a great number of Voluntaries , that offered their seruice vnto her , and were willing to hazard their lifes and fortunes fighting vnder her colours ; where shee was , there was their rendezvous . The people flockt apace , where shee had pitcht her standard : But the only man that show'd him-selfe most forward at that time to accommodate vs , being thus newly arriued , was a rich Fripper or Broaker in the high street , who asking vs , whence we came , and whither we would : when I had told him , that we were bound for this place , and had no farther to goe , and that we had no knowne lodging , nor any acquaintance , whither to direct vs ; he forth-with made profession how willing he was to further vs , and how desirous to expresse him-selfe a friend vnto vs ; and thereupon brought vs to a womans house , a friend of his , where we were kindly entertayn'd , and with a great deale of respect , not for the Asses sake , but the Goddesse , that was borne by the Asse .

This good honest Broaker , when he had seene vs in our lodging , told vs , that A Broaker insinuates him-selfe into Guzmans and his wifes acquaintance . we could not choose but be weary with our last nights ill rest , and our hard iourney : And for that we had not any , that could on the sodaine make fitting prouision of such things , as were needfull for vs , that wee should not trouble our heads therewith , not take any farther care ; for we should be supplyde by a seruant of his , whom hee would send vnto vs . And so that day hee sent vs in good store of meat ready dreft by one that kept a Cookes shop , and had alwayes good victuals in a readinesse . And after that he had furnisht vs with all things fitting , towards the euening hee him-selfe came to visit vs , and after that a few of complements and ceremonies had past too and fro betweene vs , I askt him how much hee had laid out for vs : But hee seemed to make light of it , and told me ( as one that was willing not to heare on that care ) that it was a trifle , a thing of nothing ; telling mee farther , how much he did desire to serue mee , in things of a higher nature then these were , whensoeuer occasion should offer it selfe ; and that this was not worthy the talking of , and therefore I should speake no more of it , seeming as it were to be ashamed of him-selfe , that I should touch any more vpon that string ; yet notwithstanding I did presse him to receiue the cost he had beene at ; Telling him , That friendship is friendship , and money is money ; and that I should not esteeme the lesse of his loue , if he would giue me leaue to discharge it , it being enough that I had put him to so much trouble . So at last ( to satisfie my importunitie ) he told me , that the whole came to a matter of eight Royalls , which I presently paid him : But because I would not haue him goe out of the house , I began to vse my old occupation , and putting on my cloake , I tooke my leaue of him , t●…lling him , that I must needs goe visit a certaine friend touching some businesses , that did much concerne mee , and that therefore hee would hold mee excused , and pardon this my vnmannerly proceeding . Hauing thus made my way , I left him in good conuersation in mine Hostesses lodging , and got me abroad a walking vntill it was night .

When I came home , I found the cloath laid , supper ready , and all things in that good order , and in that plentifull manner , as if I had left store of money in my wifes hands for to make this prouision . I spake not a word of it , nor did so much as aske whence shee had it , or who had sent it in ; as well because it was not fitting for mee so to doe , as also for that mine Hostesse had told mee , that wee were that night to be her guests ; as also this honest man the Broaker . And from that suppers acquaintance , hee and I remayned euer after very great and kinde friends . Hee did often come to visit vs , and would carry vs abroad to walke , and merrily to passe the time , inuiting vs sometimes to goe downe to sup by the riuer side , to dine at such and such quintas and gardens of pleasure : In the euening he would carry vs to Comedies , and bestow a box vpon vs , and there make vs a good f f In Spaine they vse at their Comedies to entertaine the women they bring thither with good wines cooled with snow , and sweet-meats . Collation ; wherewith we past away the time the better .

And albeit I must truly confesse , that this honest man did all that he could , and that nothing was wanting vnto vs , yet notwithstanding , all that hee did , seemed little or nothing vnto me ; for I must tell you , there were some , who to haue had a taste of these sauoury fruits , would haue past the bounds of honestie , and come to a higher price , and giuen much more money for a standing in such a Faire . For I knew very well , that women that are faire , and of a good presence , are like vnto your meale , which is made of the best wheat ; for from the flower , the purest and finest part thereof , that white and delicate bread is taken forth , whereon Kings and Princes , your Grandes , and Gentle-men of qualitie doe feed ; but that which is not of the choysest flower , but is browner , as it comes from the mill , is bread for the houshold , for Seruingmen , trauellers , and persons of meane account : and the bran , or reffuse part thereof , serues for dogs-meat , or for the feeding of swine , making lap of it for the one , and washe for the other . But a woman of a beautifull and cheerefull countenance , shee no sooner comes into any place , though shee be there vnknowne , but all are ready to grace her , the chiefest and principallest persons , offering , the first thing they doe , to rise , and giue her respect , the gallantest and richest amongst them , euen to the very Lords , and greatest Peeres of the Kingdome , vayling their bonnets , giuing her a faire and ciuill salutation , desiring to enioy such a dainty peece , whom Nature hath so adapted for noble conuersation . But anon after ( when these are glutted , and will no more ) the common route rushes in , first our neighbours sonnes , then those that come to the Vintage with a tanka●…d of g g New sweet wine . arrope in their hands ; a burden of wood vpon th●… backs , to make a Christmas fire ; or a basket of figs , according to the season of the yeare ; these pay a pension all the yeare long for their pleasure , as duly as they doe to their Physitian or their Barber . But when these will nible no more , but refuse to bite at the baite , the dogges will beginne to barke at her ; not a knaue shooemaker , nor poore old Cobler , that will not set vpon her , and raile at her ; nor a fieue-maker , that will not make her dance to the sound of his bels .

This kind hearted Broaker had already bestow'd on my wife a gowne of black saten , trim'd with veluet , and a scarlet mantle , which was daintily set forth with a broad parchment lace of gold , which made a glorious show ; we had a maruelous faire bed , a neate little table , and a handsome sute of chaires sutable therevnto ; but how , or which way be came by them , I knew not . Wee had foure good pieces of leather-hangings , richly gilt . In a word , the furniture of our house was now so well increased , that with the helpe of a little more houshold-stuffe , we might very well set vp for our selues , and kill our flesh within our owne doores , and make our market within our owne liberties , which could not choose but be much more gainfull vnto vs . On the other side our hostesse did fleece vs , it seeming vnto her , that she had good reason to licke her fingers , and to dip her h h Avia de meter sopa , y mojar ●…la miel . sop in our honey , and onely forsooth for her permission and Prouerbe . conniuence . But this was not a thing that I sought after , I did not so well like of it , nor did it make for my profit . And I did as little like of my Broaker , for that a better and more beneficiall Opponent sought to sit in that chayre , which he now occupied . And although I knew well enough , that hee proceeded in his dealing like an honest Broaker , yet the case was now otherwise with me , it was quite altered , and come about another way . For I would part with that to day for three , for the which to morrow I would not take tenne . Men must sell i i Eltiempoes elque lo vende . according to the season , and make their market as the time serues . Nor is Prouerbe . it materiall that such a one be an honest man in this or that particular , if I haue more need of another for my purpose . For it little importeth , that a Taylor , who is to make me vp a handsome sute of cloathes should be a good Musitian ; nor that a Physitian , who is to treat of my health , should be a famous player at Chesse . Money , more and more money , was that which I lookt after , and not honesty , and greatnesse of alliance , or good acquaintance .

That which was not of much profit , was to me tedious , and distastfull . For I could not content my selfe with onely necessary food and apparell ; I must liue like a King ; I was to be courted with extraordinary kindnesses ; and that they should buy at its weight in gold , the chaire wherein I should giue them leaue to sit , the sweet conuersation that they were to inioy , the good lookes that were cast vpon them , our permitting them to come into our house ; and aboue all , the liberty which I left vnto them , by going forth my selfe , to giue them the freer accesse . And this our honest Broaker could not doe . Hee was willing to lead vs still along by that plaine song , which hee beganne withall , when he grew first acquainted with vs : as if it had beene an imposition of some perpetuall tribute , which was so passe for euer , after one and the selfe-same forme .

I had now found out one , who did farre surpasse him both in wealth , and in merit , and was much more for my aduantage ; onely that difference did present it selfe to mine imagination , which there is between Hauing and Wishing ; the present possession of a thing , or the desiring to possesse it . As also that I knew not how to goe to this amorous Gentleman , to giue him to vnderstand , Prouerbe . that I should be very glad to embrace his friendship . And better is one k k Tienes , a qui eres . bird in the hand then two in the bush . I knew full well , and it plainely appeares vnto me , that he did much desire her , and had a moneths mind to haue a fling at her ; but he was a stranger , and durst not aduenture on the businesse . And for me to animate him on to this geare , had beene to make him the lesse to Prouerbe . esteeme of it . And to leaue the other , that was taken already in the net , had beene folly , if not madnesse . For better is stale l l Mejores pan duro , que ninguno . bread , then none at all . So that I durst neither take nor leaue . Thus did things passe for a while , waiting still when that happy day would come .

I did vsually frequent your Ordinaries , and houses of gaming , one while playing my selfe , another while expecting something to be giuen me for good lucks sake , by those that had a good hand , asking now and then , something of those that haue beene my ancient friends and acquaintance . And what with that which they gaue me , and that which my selfe had scraped together , I took occasion , when the Broaker was with vs at our house , to giue it to my wife to spend as she saw cause , because he should not know the weaknesse of my estate ; or to conceiue , that I willingly gaue way to his Visites out of meere want , and to maintaine my selfe at his cost ; but he was no sooner gone from thence , but I presently demanded the same money againe of my wife , to goe to play . And shee did not onely returne mee that , but much more . So that alwayes before him , I bare my selfe like a Lord of mine owne will , without leauing any gap open vnto him , whereby he might haue entrance to lose his respect towards me .

This stranger on the other side , went for his part sucking-in the ayre , and ( as it is in the Prouerbe ) drinking m m Beuer los vientos . To drinke in the wind , is to desire a thing with great earnestnesse . And because the wanting of it , till we come to attaine vnto it , causeth anguish and vexation to the heart , a man must of force fetch his breath thicke , insomuch that he seemeth to sup in the aire , and to drinke downe the wind . Covarr . verb. viento . downe the windes ; vsing extraordinary diligences Prouerbe . to gaine our good will ; and euery one of vs on all sides , working vpon all aduantages , to effect our seuerall intents . But I , for my part , being very carefull to auoid all disasters , especially that might fall out in mine owne house ; and for the better preuenting of dis-order , was much afraid , and wonderfull loth , that two should tread together in one and the same path ; as one that knew by experience , that one Kingdome would not admit of two n n No sufre dos cabeças vn gouierno . Heads ; nor two birds o o No●…e a●…dan bien dos paxaros juntos en vn agujero . make their nest together in one hole . Nor durst my wife likewise consent thereunto , being vnwilling to haue more sacks brought to her mill , then she could well grinde , it going much against her stomacke to bee put in the Grammer rules for a common of three . Till at last , we perceiuing that this would make well for vs , and that by how much the more the Broaker did slacken his string , so much the more the stranger did straine to shoot home , drawing his bow for that purpose to a good round compasse ; for presents , iewels , moneys , and banquets , like so many arrowes , came thicke one vpon another , in hope at last to hit the marke . I began now to looke bigge vpon the matter , and to talke in a higher straine , saying ; That I was not minded to pay a rent any longer for my lodgings , being that I was able to keepe house of my selfe . So the siege was raised , my old Hostesse and I parted , and began to set vp shop wholly for my selfe . Prouerbe .

The stranger made me a thousand ducks and congies , saluting me , wheresoeuer he met me , with a great deale of respect ; and I on the contrary lookt on the Broaker with a scornefull and disdainfull eye , showing as dogged a countenance towards him , as I could possibly put on . And by how much the more Prouerbe . the one did seeke to draw me after him ; so much the more I stroue to shake off the other .

Till at last , growing weary of him , I came and told him , that if I had now taken a house of mine owne , and had left that which hee wisht mee vnto , I had onely done it , that I might bee sole master of mine owne house , that I might goe and come at my pleasure , and be either cloathed or naked , as I saw cause , vnseene or ouer-looked by others . And that hee should doe mee a fauour to come now and then and see me , when I should bee at best leisure to receiue him , and not when I had earnest occasion of businesse . For neither I , nor my wife could alwayes be in disposition to receiue Visits .

The poore man was so out of countenance with this answer , and tooke it so Guzman shakes off the Broaker , to intertaine a new Gallant . ill at my hands , that neuer after would hee offer to put his foore within my doores , except by the mediation of his friend , she that had beene our Hostesse , and that also very seldome , some once ( as we say ) in a thousand yeares , when he could doe it handsomely , and my wife was best at leasure , neither my selfe , nor any body else , being then at home .

Now , our stranger being so open-handed and liberall as hee was , I was forced to carry my selfe fairely towards him , for hee was well able to goe through thicke and thinne , and if he held on that round pace that hee beganne , there was great hope that he would quickly bring vs out of the mire , and that wee should happely arriue to our intended iourney , and so it fell out . For my wife , showing him but a good looke , when they two were alone , hee did so highly esteeme of euery slight fauour that she afforded him , that he would requite her kindnesses with their waight in gold .

We entred into a great league of friendship ; he inuited me to his house , and when I had taken my leaue of him , hee would send home after me many , and those very good , dishes of meat , which serued very well to furnish our owne table , taking secret order with those his seruants , that carried them thither , that they should not bring them backe againe , but leaue them there , though they were all of siluer .

I was not offended at this , but it did somewhat trouble mee , that he should doe it so openly ; for there is no man so blockish , that doth not perceiue , when such things as these are done , it is not à humo de pajas , for Moone-shine in Prouerbe . the water , nor for a mans good lookes .

It is a braue thing , when a rich Gallant shall intertaine my wife with great presents , and whatsoeuer else that may giue her content , and that I may not know the end why he does it . But I was well enough contented therewithall , and all other Witals doe the like . He sayes not true , who sayes it grieues him ; for if it did grieue him ; he would neuer giue way vnto it . If I were glad thereof , and gaue my consent that my wife should kindly intertaine him ; if I suffered her to goe abroad , and was well pleased when she return'd , to see her come home laden with iewels , or with a new gowne , or with some delicate sweet-meats , brought from the banquet that was made for her ; & if my shame was so little , that I could fall heartily to them , and eate my part of them , and could dissemble all this , and much more ; they likewise doe the like ; neither will they , nor can they clap the hornes on my head , and thinke to goe without them them-selues . For I must assure them , that I vnderstand them , and they vnderstand me .

But this was the mischiefe of it , that when they saw me walke the street so well clad , with a iewell in my hat , and a hat-band sutable vnto it , garuished with stones of good value ; they would say as I past by them ; and that so loud , that I might very well heare it ; What rich stones hath Guzman in his hat ? O what a glorious show they make ; but doe you marke how that same Cornix doth out-shine all the rest ? And perhaps some of these which said this of me , did enuie my good fortune ; and others , like your Goates , did not see their owne hornes , though all the world besides did see them .

This stranger of ours , did purchase our libertie , and he had such store of wealth , that now my house was for no body else , but him . But I had alwayes a care to keepe my decorum , entertayning his friendship , and maintayning mine owne credit . The goods in my house , did like froath , gather daily more and more increase . I had both winter and summer hangings , peeces of Arras , wrought in Bruxells , others of branched Damaske interwouen with tinsell , beds of Damaske , Canopies , & quilts of the same , Turkie carpets to tread vpon , pillow-cushions for my wifes estrado , when shee was pleas'd to sit in State ; and many other moueables , that might well beseeme some great Lord . The table that I kept , and the house that I maintaynde , did not ( I assure you ) stand mee in lesse then two thousand Crownes a yeare . And when I was disposed to make my good Master almost ready to runne madde , ( which I was sometimes wont to doe , especially vpon festiuall dayes ) I would , as soone as we had din'de , command the Gitterne to bee brought in , and laid vpon the boord , and then looking cheerefully vpon my Wife , I would say vnto her ; I prethee ( good Grace ) if thou beest a good Wench , doe vs the kindnesse to bestow a Song vpon vs , it is a Holiday to day , & therefore I prethee do not stick with vs : but let vs haue it quickly , and with a good-will . For otherwise , it was a wonder to see her take her Instrument in her hand . And still in my presence , when-soeuer I caus'd her to sing , ( howbeit she knew , that I knew all , and that nothing was hidden from me ) shee would carry her selfe very soberly and decently , keeping alwayes a settled and composed countenance , and was as carefull ( as if her life had layne vpon it ) that I might not perceiue any thing to come from her , either in her lookes , or her gesture , that might giue me any the least cause to interpret it as an affront , or should otherwise force mee to make demonstration , that I tooke any dislike at it . Each of vs did vnderstand our selues ; and both one another ; though we would not seeme to vnderstand any thing , or make any show thereof to the world . With this Shooing-Horne somtimes we drew on our good Master , which cost him many a faire Crowne .

I liu'd like a yong Prince ; Siluer dishes did runne vpon wheeles round about my house ; one tumbled heere , and another there . My Coffers could not containe those rich imbroideries , and the rest of my wardrobe ; some of sundry sorts of Cloth of Gold , and others of Silkes , that were full of variety : my Cabinets were cramm'd full of Iewels , precious Stones , and other curiosities ; I neuer wanted money to game , I did triumph in plenty , and had good Cards in my hand to trumpe about ; And for this cause ▪ our friends did inioy their liberty ; for I perceiuing , that it was not fit for mee to enter into mine owne house , ( which I knew , as oft as I found the doore shut ) I past by it , and went abroad a walking , vntill a more conuenient time did offer it selfe ; and seeing , when I returned home , that the doore was open , it was a signe vnto me that the coast was cleere , and that they had past the time away in good conuersation : wherevpon I boldly went in , and sitting down , we all fell a talking of some one thing or other , as occasion offered .

Thou seest all this my happinesse ; the fairenesse of the weather ; the freshnesse of the winde ; thou seest how fauourable Fortune was vnto mee ; how she smil'd , and laught vpon me ; how franke , and liberall she was towards me . But it succeeded in the end no lesse vnhappily with mee , then all things else which I vnder-went by euill meanes . Nor doe I thinke , that any man can escape such flawes as these , whosoeuer hee shall be , that shall sayle in the same Ocean .

Vpon the fame of this so rare a piece of beauty , and the large licence that I The Courtiers court Guzmans wise . had giuen her , some Princes , and Gentlemen belonging to the Court , assumed the more liberty to themselues , who had smelt out what a hungry and sauoury sent this rasher on the coales had with it ; they walke their Stations before my house , messages are sent to and fro ; how-beit I am verily perswaded , that there was neuer any friendship strooken with them , nor any iust cause giuen , whereat our yong Master might deseruedly take offence . Yet notwithstanding , seeing himselfe thus persecuted , and as it were out-brau'd by others , that were mightier and more powerfull then himselfe , in wealth , linage , and gallantry ; he grew so exceeding iealous there-vpon , that he was ready to runne out of his wits , and had almost vtterly lost his iudgement . He went about at the first to straine himselfe to stand in competition against them all , exercising to this end , extraordinarie liberalitie towards vs ; presenting vs with gifts of great price , amounting to thousands of Ducats ; but when hee saw , that hee could not contest with them , nor bee able to resist so great force and power as theirs was , vn-constrained , without cause , or any other iust exception in the world , saue onely what his owne iealousie did suggest to his weake consideration , he by little and little fell off , and began to retire himselfe , frighted thus from vs onely with a vaine shadow .

And sometimes I went considering with my selfe , what a strange kinde of foole this was , that in his heatfull humour , set on fire with filthy Lust , hee should so eagerly follow the chase , and hunt with that violence after such dishonesties as these , to his both so great cost , and vexation of minde . I laught at him , as also at the poorenesse of his wit and iudgement . For if one or the Malds of my house had come vnto him , crauing something of him that was of good worth , hee would very willingly and freely bestow it vpon them ; but if by chance a poore man should come vnto him , and begge but halfe a Royall of him for Gods sake , he would not sticke to deny it him . All of vs receiued the reward wee deserued , we were paid in our owne coyne : The Master whom wee serued , for to inrich vs , had made himselfe poore ; and we , through our ill gouernment , could not continue rich ; so that like ruinous buildings , we fell altogether to the ground . Our first man had left the field and was fled , and now those other Gallants come on amaine : for the greater those persons are , who are priuy to their greatnesse , and truely vnderstand their owne strength and worth ; so much the more free they are in that which they pretend , and thinke that all other men must giue way to them .

I could haue told them , or demanded of them ; Sir , what seruice doe I The condition of great men . owe you ? What haue you throwne vpon mee , whereby to binde me vnto you ? What good did you euer doe mee ? Why then should you expect , that I should wait vpon you with my workes , words , and thoughts ? And which is worst of all ; besides that they are bad Pay-masters , they vse vs harshly , and beare themselues so proudly , as if we were in debt to them , and had an execution to enter by force vpon my house , my wife , and all that I had . So lawlesse was this their liberty , so vnciuill their proceeding , that within a few dayes after we fell into the hands of the Iustice .

A graue Minister of the State came to know what had past amongst vs ; A Fable of the Lyon . You may haply haue heard , how the Lyon once vpon a time , hauing admitted all the other beasts into his Company , and hauing in a generall hunting kill'd a Hart , when they came to the distribution and sharing of it , he out of his absolute authoritie , and Princely prerogatiue , adiudg'd it wholly to himselfe .

Iust so did this Minister deale with mee . And that hee might haue somewhat A Iudge fals in loue with Guzmans Wife . the better colour to doe as he did , he began ( Lyon-like ) with a little roaring , as if hee had meant to quarrell with vs . When I knew the course where-vnto hee tended , I presently had recourse vnto him , complaining of such and such wrongs that were offered vnto me , boasting my selfe to bee a Gentleman , and one that was anciently descended of the Gothes . And hee ( cunning as he was ) who desired nothing more , then that I should thus come vnto him , gaue me kinde entertainment , and causing me to sit downe side by side with him , he began to aske of me what Country-man I was ? I told him that I was of Seuill . O ( said hee ) of Seuill ? The best Countrey in all the world .

Then began he to treat of that Citie , indearing it very much vnto mee , as if , by his commendation of it , I should haue receiued a great deale of honour , or profit thereby . Hee demanded of mee what my Parents were , and how they were called ? And when I had named them vnto him ; he told mee , that they had beene his very good friends , and acquaintance , making a long discourse vnto me , how when he was Iudge there , he had sentenced a certaine sute in his fauour . And he farther told mee , that he did assure himselfe , that my Mother was still liuing , to whom hee was well knowne in her yonger dayes . In a word , hee proceeded so farre with me in these and like kinde of complements , that there was nothing wanting to make it full and complete , but his acknowledging himselfe to be my neere Kinsman . Which I did still looke for , especially when I saw him come to such particulars , and that hee could tell me such and such tokens ; which made me to say with my selfe , Omnia possunt potentes . What cannot your great men doe ? And now I am falne vpon this Theame , I cannot but call to minde a certaine Iudge , who hauing most faithfully vs'd his Iudicature , and exercised his Office with a great Of a Iudge that was giuen to wanto●…nesse . deale of integritie , his time of residencie being expired , and that he was to render an account ( as the custome is ) of his Gouernment , they could not charge him with anything , saue only for his wenching , and for being a little too much subiect to this humane frailtie ; for which , being sharpely reprehended , he made answer ; That when he was recommended by them to this Office , they had only giuen him in charge , that hee should deale vprightly , and truly administer Iustice , which he most faithfully performed , and that no man could taxe him of the contrary . Would yee therefore be pleased to peruse my Letters , and to looke vpon the Contents of my Commission , and if there ( amongst other my instructions ) you shall finde that I was by vertue of them , inioyned Chastitie , I shall most willingly submit my selfe to your censure , and indure such punishment as yee shall be pleased to inflict vpon me . So that , because this clause was not expresly specified in his Commission , nor any particular mention made thereof ; it seemeth vnto these kinde of men , that they doe not faile in their dutie , nor doe any thing contrary to their Office , though they sweepe ( as they say ) a whole street before them , and doe otherwise vndoe a Countrie : As did a certaine Iudge , who hauing destowred Of a Iudge that was a d●…owrer of Virgias . about some thirtie Maidens , and amongst those , the daughter of a poore woman , who when she saw what wrong he had done her , shee went vnto him , and besought him , that since he had done , or vndone her daughter , that hee would be pleased to returne her home vnto her , to the end that her dishonour might not be diuulged .

Whereupon , he taking a Royall of a a A piece of foure shillings . eight out of his Purse , said vnto her : Good woman , I know nothing concerning your daughter ; Lo , here be eight Royals for you , take you these , and get you some Masses to be said to S. Antonio of Padua , that he may doe you the fauour to recouer her lost maiden-head . A very good amends . I doe not know to whom this may seeme to bee well done . Doe thou tell me if thou canst . I am almost at my wits end , to thinke on the small punishment , that is inflicted vpon such great faults .

He commanded me to get me home to my house , proffering ( out of his loue vnto me ) to doe me many fauours , and that hee should count himselfe very happy , if at any time it should lie in his power to doe mee a courtesie . For it was a sufficient motiue vnto him , to binde him vnto me , that I was of Seuill , and the sonne of such parents ; and that as well in this , as all other occasions , hee would assist mee all that he could , and afford mee his best fauour .

With this faire answer I got me home . And within a few dayes after , when Of a Iudge that was in authority . I and my wife were all alone , and thought our selues secure , not thinking on any thing in the world , much lesse dreaming of his comming thither , behold , one night , when he walked the Round , he came to our doore , and commanding one of his people to knocke thereat , vpon answer giuen , they askt for me ; intreating a Iarre of water of me for his Worship . I well knew where his thirst lay ; Whereupon I earnestly besought him , that he would doe me the honour to come in , that he might sit , and take his drinke , and not ( like beggers ) to take it without doores . He desired nothing more , this was that which he lookt for . He comes in , and when hee was sate , some Conserues were brought him to sweeten his mouth , which hauing tasted , he tooke the Iarre and dranke . Then began he to enter into Discourse , telling vs , that he had walked himselfe weary , and that he had seene that night many faire women , but none that came neere my wife . He said farther , that he had heard her exceedingly commended for her good voyce . I then will'd her to take her Violl , and seeing his Worship was pleased to giue her the hearing , that shee should sing some one song or other , which she thought fit . Which shee did without any coynesse , or straining courtesie ; it seeming vnto vs both , that it would much aduantage vs , to get so great a person to be our friend , who might be ready to stead vs vpon all occasions . The man was astonished , as well with the seeing , as the hearing of her ; & when he was to take his leaue , he willed me to come now and then to see him , and that I should make my selfe no stranger . With that , he went his way ; and I and my wife began to talke as well of this , as other things that had past ; and how farre forth this his fauour might be a meanes , to make vs hereafter be more both respected and feared . I did visit him sometimes : and one day among the rest , carelesse of any thing that might befall me , he said vnto me ; How happens it ( Guzman ) whilest I am yet liuing , ( for men are mortall , and I may die before I shall bee able to doe thee any good , if it be not done the sooner ) that thou doest not make vse of my fauour , and sue vnto me for some Commission , that may be both honourable and profitable vnto thee ? I told him , that I held my selfe much bound vnto him , and that I should euer rest thankfull for this expression of his loue and fauour towards me , but because I was loath to be troublesome vnto him , as also for that I had not as yet serued him in any thing , whereby to deserue any the least kindenesse from him , I had forborne to moue him in things of this nature . He then selling me the friendship of my father and mother , ( though this his kindenesse towards me , proceeded more from his loue to my wife then my selfe ) he offred me a Commission ; telling me , that it would be very beneficiall vnto me . I thank't him for it , though Guzman imployd in Commissions , for the Councell , de la hazienda . The Councell de la hazienda is of the same nature with the Barons of our Kings Exchequer this was the Induction to all my future mis-fortunes . For within two dayes after , he puts those papers into my hands , with order for the recouery of certaine debts that were due to the Exchequer . The which he had procured ( begging it for me ) of an especiall good friend of his , a great man in his place , and one that assisted in that Court ; telling him that I was a friend of his , and a well-deseruing Person , worthy to be imployed in waightie matters , as should appeare by that good satisfaction , which I should giue both of my person and imployment .

When I had my Dispatch , I went from home , but ( I must confesse ) sore against my will ; I carried along with me eight hundred Marauedis , which I had by way of salarie , or stipend ; and for that I had euer beene accustomed to fare well , I knew not how to begin to frame my selfe to liue with this poore allowance , much lesse to be able to put money in my Purse , or to hoord vp to carry , or send home any thing to my house . But I saw now , that there was no other remedie , and must of force doe as I did : and so for auoyding of farther mischiefe , I held my peace , and accepted of it . Partime , v perdime , My departure was my destruction . And when I went away , all went awry . For it seemed vnto this kinde Master of mine , that he might get himselfe slaues at other mens cost to doe him seruice , and that with these eight hundred Marauedis , I might part shares with my wife , and maintaine two houses , and that this would be a sufficient recompence for vs ; out of which respect , he was not only willing to be exempted from all other taxes and tributes belonging vnto vs ; but also , that my wife should not looke out to see the Sunne , nor to receiue any Visits , but only his . He sought to be so absolute a Iudge ouer any thing that was mine , and did so wring and pinch vs , that I and my familie were ready to starue for hunger , so that we were driuen dayly to goe selling some of our hous-hold stuffe , for to put bread in our mouthes . Guzmans Wife likes not the Iudges miserable proceeding .

My wife ( who was now become his Hostesse ) could not liue by these recknings , it was no good account for her , to indure so much subiection , and to be tyed to so short prouision . She first began to shew some dislike of this his imperious , yet base dealing ; and also many times of purpose refused to see him ; hiding her selfe out of the way , vsing the helpe of a great friend of hers , who still made her excuse , when she was disposed that he should not come at her : For she thought she should haue made her selfe by this market ; but it proued otherwise .

But when this new Master of mine perceiued the euill correspondence which she held with him , thinking with him-selfe , that my presence would quickly remedie all this , and bring the Bowle to it 's old bias , he presently gaue order , that there should be no more Prorogations granted vnto me , and that I should be commanded to giue an account of that which I had done . They put me to it , and I did it ; more willingly resigning vp my Office , then I tooke it vpon me ; for I found my state therby much impawned , and my house much waited and consumed . He thought that my presence should haue beene the only remedie to giue him content , and that he might the better inioy all things to his owne liking ; but it fell out farre otherwise , for by my presence , his expence increased , and wee had the better meanes to make it rise . Hee was much troubled here-with , and knew not in the world how to mend himselfe ; and conceiuing with himselfe , that nothing would worke vs better to his will then rigour , then to put vs to our shifts , that we might come Cap in hand , crouching vnto him , and that with our armes acrosse , and teares in our eyes , we should come and cry him mercy , and intreat his fauour ; he treated with his Colleagues and fellow Officers , to banish vs the Court ; and so accordingly it was notified vnto vs . I began to cast vp my recknings , and made this account with my selfe ; This Lord Iudge takes himselfe to bee Guzman banished Madrid . such a great man , that he thinkes , he does me a great fauour , in putting mee to maintaine his House , and procure his pleasure , selling him that for a song , which I haue bought with so many affronts , and scraped together with such a deale of toyle .

Againe , it will doe me no good to stay here , if I may not haue free leaue to make the best of mine owne Commodities . It will be the lesser euill ( thought I with my selfe ) to obey this banishment , and to be packing , then to tarry here to no purpose . For though it were hard measure that was offred vnto vs , and did pinch vs somewhat ; yet I knew it would wring him much more , nay gall him to the very heart . For , though we lost one of our owne eyes , yet we had put out both his . For he mist of his marke ; he had taken the wrong Sow by the eare , and all went kim-kam , cleane contrary to his expectation . So this poore silly asse , thinking to bang vs , had made a Cudgell for his owne sides . Besides , at the end of that yeere , those ten yeeres were to be expired , wherein I was to giue my Creditors satisfaction .

All these things had I laid together , and thorowly weigh'd them with my selfe . I knew like wise that my Mother was aliue ; so on the sudden I hired a Coach for our owne persons , and two Carts , for to carry our stuffe , and our people , leauing the Court and the Courtiers to themselues , bidding them farewell for euer . Thinking with my selfe , that those that came from Peru , flush with their gold and siluer , would proue a great deale more profitable for vs . And so we went quietly along to Seuill .

CHAP. VI.

Guzman de Alfarache and his Wife come to Seuill ; Hee findes his Mother to be now somewhat ancient , and well strucken in yeeres . His Wife gets her away to Italy with one of the Captaines of the Gallies , leauing him alone to himselfe , and exceeding poore . Where-vpon , he fals to his old trade of theeuing .

FOr that they , who escape out of some great danger , as oft as they thinke there-vpon , it seemeth still vnto them , that they are yet scarce free from the perill they were in ; I did often call my life to remembrance , but neuer to amendment ; and more particularly , that of my late lewd courses , the bad estate wherein I found my selfe , the little honour that I had to mine owne credit , and the small , or no respect at all which I bare towards my God , all the while that my feete walked in these euill steps . I beganne to wonder at my selfe that I was Guzman discourseth of those Wittols , that willingly make their Wiues turne Whores . become such a beast , as amongst men , none could be greater . For none of all those , that are created on earth , would euer haue permitted that which I did winke at ; making my selfe a liuing , out of my wiues lewd and filthy gaine , putting her into the occasion of sinning , giuing her tacit licence to trade , nay , expressely commanding her to turne Whore : And which is as bad , ( if not worse then all the rest ) that I should require from her , my food , my raiment , and the maintaining of my house , whilest I my selfe ledde an idle kinde of life , holding ( like the sluggard ) my thumbs vnder my girdle . It is a fearefull and terrible thing , that I should thinke my selfe to be an honest man , and to haue honour in mee , being so farre from it , and so depriued of true good . That for to haue crownes to play , I should crowne my selfe with infamy ; and that by not vsing these armes of mine , to labour for my liuing , I should blot those Armes of my Ancestors , and the noblenesse of that house , whereof I was descended ; Losing that , which is one of the hardest things to be gotten : to wit , a good name , and opinion in the world ; That I should prophane so holy a Misterie ; That I should vse it in that ill and vile manner , that being I should haue made it to serue as a meanes of my saluation , I made it the high-way to bring mee to hell , and onely for food and apparell , to nourish , and cloath this miserable carkasse ; That I should oppose my selfe to such perill , when as behinde my backe , and euen face to face , they might haue put an affront vpon mee , obliging mee thereby rather to lose my life , then to indure such dishonour ; That a man should not be able to do more then he can do ; that he should know it , and dissemble it , either out of his too much loue , or his too much griefe , or that he may not proclaime himselfe a Cuckold to the world : I do not so much wonder at this . And this may not onely not be a Vice , but a Vertue , and a goodnesse , in case hee consent not there-vnto , nor affoord any fauour or entrance into it . But to doe as I did , who did not onely take pleasure therein , but as if it had been necessary for mee so to doe , did ( as they say ) cast my Cloake ouer it ; I doe not well know , whether I were blind , or mad , or bewitcht , that I did not consider better there-vpon ; or if I did , that I did not vse some good remedie against it , but did further it all that I could . O foole , foole that I was and giue me leaue heere to be-foole my selfe a thousand times , that I was so wretchlesse as I was ; that I did not so much as once dreame on this mischiefe , and seeke to preuent it ; knowing , how incompatible companions these two are , honra , y muger guitarrera ; Honestie , and a woman that playes and sings to her Instrument ; and that I did not weigh , what hurt it had Musicke in a Woman , a bewitching thing . done others , and that it might likewise ruine her and me , besides the dishonour that must thereby redound to vs both . Men , for to oblige their Mistresses vnto them , are wont to bestow musicke on them vnder their windowes , and to sing vnto them in the streetes ; but my Wife was such a one , that shee made these men to fall in loue with her , by going abroad to sing and play at their houses . And it is a cleere case , that such graces are appetible in their owne nature , and much desired .

Now then , if men were inuited , nay , incited there-vnto , why should they not desire , and seek after my Wife ? What wit or iudgement hath that man in the world , who wil make show of his treasure to theeues ? What quiet sleepes can hee take ? with what ease can hee rest , liuing ( as hee cannot choose ) in in a continuall feare of being robb'd ? How was it possible , that I should be such an Asse , that since I had giuen my selfe ouer to such shame and reproach , which haply might be occasioned by my too much weakenesse , I should ( for mine owne priuate interest ) incurre another farre greater ? To wit , to fall in company , into the commendation of my Wife , extolling to the skies , in the presence of those that pretended loue vnto her , those louely qualities , and commendable parts that were in her , intreating also her , nay , sometimes commanding her , that shee should discouer and make show of some illicit part of her person , as her brest , armes , feet , and likewise ( but I will heere hold my peace for shame , for I blush to thinke on it ) that they might see whether her flesh were fat , plumpe , and soft ; white , browne , or ruddy ? So that all grew worse and worse with me . For that which heretofore I did hate and abhorre with my heart , and was as it were a death vnto me to indure it , was now by vse and custome become easie and familiar vnto me , and I grew at last to take great delight in it . That I should consent , that she should receiue Visits , and that I my selfe should bring Customers to my house , and leauing them with her , should get mee out of doores , and walke abroad ; and aboue all , that I should faine simplicitie , and make my selfe ignorant , as if there were no such matter in the winde ; and that I should thinke withall , that they did verily beleeue , that this was a good and lawfull thing , being indeed a most depraued and wicked Act ? That I should set her a-worke to sollicite Commissions , and to follow businesses at such great Ministers houses , as had a minde vnto her , and desired nothing more , then that shee should come vnto them , and that I should make , as if I knew nothing , so slight reckoning of that infamie , which returning with them , or without them , she brought home with her ? That they making her so many feasts and banquets , giuing her so many Iewels , so many Crownes , and so many costly Gownes , that they could thinke , that I should beleeue , that they bestow'd all these things vpon her for nifles in a bagge , for meere smoke , for her faire lookes , for very pure loue , and honest affection , simply and plainely , without any doubling , or other by-pretension ? What can I answere for my selfe ? Or what can bee expected from mee , who not onely gaue way therevnto , but did also worke for her to runne that course ? That fellow had good What a Prisoner said to Guzman . reason to say that he did , who seeing how well I began to thriue in Madrid , himselfe being then in prison , hee said in the presence of my selfe , and others . You see in what case I am heere ; it is now some three yeeres since that I was apprehended for a Thiefe , a Forger , an Adulterer , a Slanderer , a Murderer , and a thousand other crimes , which they laid to my charge ; all which being heaped vpon mee , I sinke vnder the burthen of them , and am ready to perish for want of food : whereas Sennor Guzman , onely by giuing his Wife leaue to take her liberty , liues free , takes his case , and growes rich .

What think'st thou , could I think , when I heard this ? O accursed riches , accursed ease , accursed freedome , and accursed also bee that day , wherein I consented to any such thing , whether it were for loue , necessitie , fauour of great Persons , or any other interest of mine owne . But because the end may be knowne , which that man must come to , who gaines by such vngodly meanes , and that ye may see the vnfortunate successe of such base delights and pleasures , I will recount my mis-fortunes vnto you , and intertaine you with the discourse of my sharpe and bitter life , which was as ill bestowed on mee , as it was ill imployed by me .

We traueld to Seuill ( as they say ) al passo del buey : with the foot a a Prouerb . Al passo del buey . of an Guzman leaues Madrid , and goes for Seuill . Oxe ; That is , faire and softly , and with a great deale of leisure . For my Wife was afraid of the iogging of the Coach , least it should make her little foysting-Dogge sicke , which she carried along with her in her lap , in which was all her happinesse , it was her onely iewell , and her dearest delight . For one of these fizzling-curres is a maine piece of a Ladies Essence , and the proper passion of a Gentle-woman . Nor can they any more goe without them , then a Physician without his Gloues and his Ring , an Apothecarie without a Chesse-boord , a Barber without a Gitterne , a Miller without a Kit , or a Spanish Don , without a Tooth-pick .

When we were come thither , out of the desire that we had to draw profit The foolish conceits , which vaine men flatter themselues withall . from those that returned from Peru , and to see our house to become such another , as the Contractation house for the Indies ; whither & from whence , barres of gold and siluer dayly come , and goe ; and that it might bee all built of Plate , and pau'd with Gold ; mee thought it seemed vnto mee , that I saw them already entring in at my doores , their backes bowing vnder them with the burthen of their Barres , so massie is that kinde of metall ; and that their strong-sowne pockets were ready to rip and rend in sunder , with the weight of their double Pistolets , and Royals of eight , and all to offer them vp to that their Idol , my Wife .

With this golden conceit , and glorious imagination , I sought to reuenge my selfe vpon him that had banisht vs the Court ; and said with my selfe ; O thou Traytor ; Thou thought'st to put a tricke vpon mee ; but if any bee coozen'd , it is thy selfe ; for all fell out to vs for the best . The affront that thou offered'st me , hath lighted on thine owne head . I am now comming into the Country of Cucan̄a , or the Land of Xanxa , where is Gods plenty of all things , and where the streetes are strowed with Siluer , where wee shall be no sooner arriued , but they shall come forth to receiue vs with a rich Canopy of State , where we shall all liue like Kings .

With these , and the like thoughts , I call'd to remembrance , whatsoeuer had succeeded there vnto me , in that my first departure from Seuill . S. Lazaro his Church would not out of my minde ; I saw the Fountaine where I drunke ; the Stone , whereon I slept in the Church-Porch ; the steppes , by which I went vp and downe ; I saw his Sacred Temple , and that holy Chappell , where I so deuoutly said my prayers ; And though I was farre off from it , I saluted the Patron thereof in this manner :

O glorious Saint ; when I tooke my leaue of thee , I went away with teares afoot , poore , all alone , and a child . Now I returne to see thee rich , attended , merry , and a married man .

Then was represented vnto me from the very beginning all the discourse Touching these things , see the first Part , Chap. 3. & . 5. of my life , ripping it vp euen to that very instant . I remembred my selfe of my Hostesse that kept a victualing house by the High-way side , and of the Inne , where they gaue me that good froyze of Egges , and the Muleter of Cantillana ; but I had now left that on the right hand . I entred by that Royall Causey , we turn'd about by the Field , rounding the Citie , till we came to the Inne where our Carts were , where , of necessitie my people were to stay ; And for that all those were steps which I had often troden , when I was a boy , & that place was wel known vnto me , because I was there bred & born , my bloud began to rise as cheerefully , as if I had seene mine owne Mother . We lodged there that night , but not very well . But in the morning I rose vp with the Sun , for to seeke out a new Lodging , and to free my goods from that Magazine , as also to make inquirie , if any one could tell me tidings of my Mother . But for all the good diligence therein vsed by me , all was to no end ; I could heare no newes of her , no , not a word . I thought I should haue found all things as I left them ; but they were so farre from being in statu , quo priùs , in the same case , wherein they were before , that there was not so much as a shadow , or any memoriall thereof remaining . For some were altered , others absent , and most of them dead , insomuch that there was scarce one stone left vpon another , whereby a man might be able to say ; This is still the same Seuill . I forbore for the present to make any farther search after her , deferring it till some fitter season , in regard of the great haste that I had at that time to accommodate my selfe ; and going about to see how I could fit my selfe , I might perceiue a bill , newly set vp ouer the doore of a certaine house , that was to be let in the a a A Ward . A liberite . A street . A neighbourhood . Barrios of St. Bartholmew , being within the precincts of the said Parish . I made meanes to see it , I viewd it , I lik't it then well , I hyred it for some moneths , and paying my Rent before-hand , I caus'd all my stuffe to be carryed thither .

We rested our selues some two dayes , eating and sleeping our fill , till my Grace began to thinke with her selfe , that it was not fit , that she should come to so noble a Citie as that was and so much famoused thorowout the whole world , to mue her selfe vp within doore , & not once offer to walke abroad . I got me to the b b Gradas de Seuilla . A place like our Exchange in London , where men meet to walke , & talke . Gradas ; for her , I had hyred a Squire , to vsher her thorow the streets , for that these kinde of people are best acquainted with them ; and that she might goe see those things , that she had most minde to , without rouing vp and downe at randome , or losing of her selfe , or without asking which was the way to such , or such a place . And so for fifteene dayes together , she neuer folded vp her Mantle . For euery morning and euening , she duly all that while walked abroad , and was neuer weary , nor fully satisfied with seeing such Greatnesses , as did offer themselues euery where to her view . For albeit , although that she was in Madrid , she liked it very well , and so well , that she then thought , that that Court had the aduantage of all other habitations of the world for it's State and Maiestie , the greatnesse and great number of their Dukes , Marquesses , Condes , and other Titulados , for it's concourse of Embassadours from all forraine parts for the good Trading , that is in it , for their temperate carriage , their discretion in generall , and their libertie without comparison , for the earth affords not a freer place to liue in : Yet she found in Seuill , the sauour of a Citie , another I know not what , other Greatnesses , though not in the same qualitie , for there wanted Kings there to keepe their Courts , nor so many Grandes and men of Title , at least in quantitie ; yet had they great store of wealth amongst them , and were in no lesse esteeme ; for siluer was there as common amongst the vulgar sort , as Copper money in other places , and they made such small reckning of it , that they spent it farre more freely .

Within a few dayes after we came thither , Lent was come , and we saw the Holy Weeke in that manner , as it is there solemnized , wee saw the liberall almes that were there , and at that time bestowed on the poore , the store of Waxe which was spent in Taper-lights . My wife was strooken with wonder , and as a woman besides her selfe , not well imagining how this could possibly be : so farre did it out-strip in workes , that which had beene vttered of it in words .

Now in this meane time , which was not long after my arriuall in this Citie , I had , by the great care that I had taken , and by some circumstances , got to the knowledge of my mother , and if I may so say , had found her out by the tracke of her bloud . For my wife entring into speech with some other faire Gentle-women , that were of her acquaintance , as they were discoursing of diuers things , falling by the way vpon her , she came to know , that shee kept company with a handsome young Wench , to whom she was suspected to be Mother , for the good vsage , wherewith she treated her , and for the due respect which she bare vnto her . But in truth it was not so ; for shee had no Guzman heares newes of his Mother , and how she got her liuing . other childe but my selfe . But the true cause thereof only was this ; that seeing she was left thus all alone , poore , and growing now old , she had bred her vp of a little Girle , to doe her seruice hereafter , whom she now made profit of , whereby they made a shift to liue as well as they could . I , when I had notice of her , was very instant with her , to haue her come liue with mee ; but I could not winne her to it , being wondrous loth to leaue this young Wench , as well for that she had bred her vp ; as also , for that she was vnwilling to haue any difference with a daughter in Law , which , her discretion told her , could not well be auoyded . And as oft as I intreated her thereunto , she would still answer me , a a Dos tocas en vn fuego , nunca ençienden lumbre à derechas . A mother in Law , and a daughter inLaw , seldome agree well together . Que dos tocas en vn fuego , nunc à en●…ienden lumbre à derechas . That two white Kerchiefs in one Kitchen , did neuer yet Prouerb . make good fire : Themselues being apter to kindle one another , then to kindle it . For the sorrow is not so great which a woman suffers , when she liues alone , by , and of her selfe , as is the torment which she indureth , when she is inforced to keepe Company contrary to her liking . And seeing that there was neuer yet any daughter in Law , that could liue peaceably and louingly with her Mother in Law , she was of the minde , that my wife would liue more merrily alone by her selfe with me , and rest better contented with it , then if she should liue with her . But in the end , the loue of a sonne preuailed so farre with her , that I had perswaded her to yeeld to my desire . Shee was my Mother , I desired to cherish her , and to make much of her , and that she might now take her ease in her old age . For albeit to mee she did still represent her selfe with the selfe-same beauty , and the same freshnesse of colour , and clearenesse of skinne , with the which I left her , when I parted from her ; yet was she now so quite altered from that shee was , that it was hard to say , This is shee . I found her leane , old , tawny , toothlesse , her face Beauties frailty . ( like an old Apple - Iohn ) all shriueled , and altogether another kinde of creature . I saw in her the ruines of Time ; and how yeeres consume euery thing . Where-vpon turning my selfe about to my Wife , and looking wistly vpon her , I told her ; This faire face of thine must run the like Fortune one day ; beauty will not last for euer : And if at any time a woman chance to escape that deformitie , which age layeth vpon her ; yet at least shee must fall at last into the hands of death , which will dis-figure euen the yongest body , and claw all the flesh from the bones . I did figure the like vnto my selfe . But as well in this , as in all other those good considerations , which had offred themselues Guzman vnsettled in his good resolutions . vnto me , I did iust as he doth , who comes to drinke in an Inne , that stands in the High-way , who as soone as he has drunke , sets downe the glasse , and goes his way . They stayd but a little while with mee ; I kept them still going , but neuer proffer'd them a chaire to sit downe and rest themselues ; for those that I had in my house , were occupied and taken vp by Appetite , and Sensualitie . At my earnest intreatie , the Mother and Daughter in Law See the first book the first Part. Chap. 1. & 2. came to house together . My Mother , you knew her well inough before , though not by sight , yet by report , and those famous things you had heard of her . She was able to ouer-master the best of them , not any of them all that could goe beyond her for her wit , and her vnderstanding ; as well because these things were so naturally and truely her owne ; as also , for that shee had beene schooled and trained vp in them ; and aboue all , hauing the aduantage of so many yeeres experience .

Shee gaue my wife very good counsell , aduising her , that she should not The instructions of the Mother in Law , to her daughter in Law . Prouerb . admit into her company the young men of that street wherein she dwelt , but ( like the Fox ) should fetch her prey farther off ; for besides the infamie and dis-honour that she should get thereby , she told her ; that they are Como agua de por San Iuan ; a a Aquas de por San Iuan ; quitan el prouecho , y no lo dan. quitan el prouecho , y ellos no lo dan ; Like vnto your Midsummer raine , which quits all profit , and yeelds no gaine . They will rather draw from you , then bring any benefit to you . They dine and sup still at home , and when they know not what to doe , or how otherwise to bestow their time , then will they come to our house , and looke to be entertained by vs in good conuersation ; there will they stay all that euening ; Tres neçios en Prouerb . plata , b b Tres neçios en plata , y vn majadero en menudos . y vn majadero en menudos ; Three fooles in one dish , and a blockhead cut out in Sippets . Hauing no other ground for their acquaintance , but this weake foundation , that they are ( forsooth ) of the same street or Parish , wherein you dwell .

Of your Court Pages , your Students at Law , and your Vniuersitie young Pages . Students . Schollers . Frie , she read the like Lecture vnto her ; telling her , that they were like vnto Crowes , which would smell out flesh a farre off , and were good for nothing else but to pecke at it , and when they had done , get them gone .

Shee wisht her to set a Crosse vpon her doore , to keepe all married men out ; for , from no enemie that she had , could she receiue greater harme . For Married men . I ealous wiues , their condition . wiues that are iealous , commit a thousand outrages , and cause millions of inconueniences to come vpon you . And when they cannot come to mischiefe you , and worke their will vpon you themselues ( for not one amongst a thousand of them , but will scratch out your eyes , if shee doe but imagine , you draw the custome from their Mill ) they will get them to this , or that Iudge , and with foure teares , two sighes , one wry mouth , and a wringing of the hands , they will put all the Towne in an vprore , and vtterly ouerthrow your credit . In a word , she gaue in this kinde , many true , wholsome , and sound Instructions , as one that from the very wombe of her Mother , proceeded Doctresse in her Art , had all her Lessons that she had learn'd , at her fingers ends , and knew how to make vse of them . She carried her alwayes along with her , whither-soeuer she went , omitting no station , that she did not goe vnto ; no Feast , that she did not visit , nor no street , that she did not walke thorow .

When then they came home , they would one while returne with Tasselgentles , Kinde Louers . Rough hewne Hacksters . amorous Knights , like Amadis de Gaule , that would easily be man'd , and quickly brought to stoope to the Lure ; and other-whiles with fierce Mastiffes , roaring Boyes , and ruffian-like Swaggerers , such as would sweare and drinke , and throw the house out at the Windowes ; And out of these my Mother did cull , and picke out such , as she thought would make most for our profit : for , hauing traded so long as she had done in that Countrie , shee knew which tracke to take , there was not that path , which she had not beaten ; nor that thing which she did not know ; and knowing all , she knew best how to goe beyond them all .

For your beardlesse yong Gallants , and Sattin-cheekt boyes , shee would Young Gallants . not haue her to haue any thing to do with them ; nor to be beholding to them for so much as a sticke of fire , which is a common courtesie betwixt neighbour and neighbour . For such as these will not sticke to tell you , that their penny is as good siluer as yours ; their Sugar-pellets , are as sweet as your Conserues ; that their gay cloathes , their curl'd Locks , and strong Perfumes , deserue your person , and that you should kindely ( without any other retaliation ) entertaine their loue : And they will also thinke ( being well conceited of themselues ) that you should rather woo them , then they you ; and that you should make them a curt'sie , and cry , I thanke you Sir . She tooke a great deale of paines with her in these , and the like ; but aboue all , shee bid her take heed , that she held no commerce or correspondence with those of the Place of San Francisco , and that she should be afraid how she did meddle with them ; for if she once begin to haue any thing to doe with your Officers of the Courts of Iustice ; as your Clerkes , and Registers , the whole rabble of Lawyers and their Clerkes . them will runne in vpon you , euen to those that write at the Deske , and will copie you out a sheete for a groat . And being they follow the Law , they thinke , that all that is yours , is theirs , and that of right it belongs vnto them . For if you oncefall into their hands , there is no scaping from them ; for either by faire meanes , or by foule ; by intreaties , or by threatnings , being so absolute , and so dissolute , as they are , ( I meane some of them ) they exercise more Tyrannies , and more cruelties , then Totila , or Dionysius , as if there were not a God for them , as well as for other folkes .

The Fleete was not come ; the Citie was in great want ; their purses were shut , and our mouthes open ; and we were ready to dye for hunger . We fell a selling , and then a eating ; and which was worse , we paid a great rent , and had little commings in . All went ill with vs , wee had brawling and scolding at home , and the poore Maid that was in our house , she paid for it ; off goes her Kerchiefe , and with it her haire , tugging her thereby vpon euery light or slight occasion , keeping a great deale of stirre about toyes and trifles , that were not worth the talking of . There was not that Rogue , or base Raskall , but would dare to doe vs wrong , and not sticke to gybe and Fleare at Prouerb . Don Fulano , y Cutano : Words of scorne , men not deigning to call vs by our owne name . Intimating that we are base fellowes , and not worthy to be made any reckoning of . Couarruuias . The Mother-in-Law , and Daughter in Law , fall together by the cares . vs ; one saluting mee in scorne , with the stile , of Sennor Don Fulano , and another with that of Don Cutano . My Wife liu'd in a continuall feare , and was now growne weary , and sicke of the Mother-in-Law ; For in regard that with me , shee had liu'd so long at her owne libertie , and had taken so much head , and now finding her selfe some-what restrain'd of it , and that she could no longer bee Mistresse of her owne will ; and that if the one did but speake , the other would begin to grumble ; of euery gnat , they made a Cammell ; and of Mole-hils , Mountaines . And such a cruell storme & tempest would arise between them , that because I would not be Stickler betweene them , or seeme to take one part more then another , I would take my Cloake , and throwing it on my shoulders , when I saw these Dolfines once begin to play aboue water , and hye me ( with all the haste I could ) out of the house , and get mee abroad , leauing them together by the eares , tugging one anothers head-geare off ; fight Dogge , fight Beare , take them off who would , for mee . For I would haue nothing to doe with them .

My Wife hereat was so mad , and grew so angry with me , that I would not shew my selfe on her side , that by little and little she grew to hate mee ; that Guzmans wife begins to hate her husband . whether it were right or wrong , she thought it fit , that Man and Wife , seeing God had ioyn'd vs together , we should cleaue each to other ; or whether with , or without reason , I had great reason to take her part against my Mother : but that on the other side I held not to be so lawfull .

Wherevpon her hate grew to that height , and she did so abhorre my company , that meeting with an occasion by meanes of a Captaine of the Gallies Guzmans wife goes away with a Captaine of the Neapolitane Gallies . of Naples , that lay there in the rode , she exchanged my loue for his . And gathering all the money together she was able to make , and those Iewels of Gold and Siluer , which we were stored with at that time , she hoysed sayle , and went for Italy , I not knowing then for the present , what was become of her .

I haue heard it spoken , That he is a Mad-man , or a Foole , that will seeke after his Wife , when she is once gone . And that a man should make a golden a a Prou. Al enemigo , hazer la puente de plata , por donde huyesse . Bridge , for a flying enemy : And be glad , that he can be so rid of him .

I thought with my selfe , That I should better be b b Prouerb . Mejor solo , que mal accompan̄ado . alone , then ill accompanied . For , although it be true , that I gaue way to all her desires , and so had all my maintenance by that meanes ; whereas otherwise I should haue wanted meat to put in my mouth ; and cloathes , to put on my backe ; yet I grew weary of it , because euery one had one fling or other at me .

See the force of vse ; for being that I was alwayes bred vp to basenesse , and The force of 〈◊〉 . was euer accustomed to heare affronts , when I was a child , and afterwards when I grew some-what bigger , I could the better beare them , when I came to be a man .

My Wife was gone from me , and therein she did me a fauour ; for besides that I was now free from that obligation of giuing way , that she should leade that kinde of life , which she did ; I was likewise free from that dayly sinne , which might haue layen vpon my conscience ; For I did not cast her off ; but she for to satisfie her owne wilfull humour , absented herselfe from me . And it was impossible , that I should follow her , and hunt her out for the hazzard that I should runne , if I should returne backe againe into Italy . These difficulties therefore offering themselues vnto me , I ledde a retyred life with my Mother . And not hauing where-withall handsomely to maintaine our selues , we fell a selling such houshold-stuffe as was left . But there beeing more dayes Guzman sels all 〈◊〉 ●…ath . in the yeere , then wee had implements in the house , all was gone within a very short time . Saint Iohn , a a Prouerb . San Iuan , y Co●…pus Chris●… , ●…veron para ●…i , en Vn dia. Guzman fals to stealing of C●…oakes . & Corpus Christi , hapned to me all on a day . I had now brought both ends together : I wanted goods to sell , and money to buy . I found my selfe out of reparations , not hauing where-withall to cloath my backe , nor to feede my belly ; not any thing else , whereby to gaine a penny , vnlesse I should fall againe to my old trade . I got mee forth a nights into those streetes , where there were diuers turnings , or crosse-wayes , and when I had made my purchase , I would come home laden with two or three Cloakes , such as I could compasse with least trouble , and perill to my person .

The next morning , one of these two courses I tooke with them , that I turn'd them in a trice either into Mandillians , Doublets , and Hose , altering the propertie of them , or else ridde my hands otherwise of them as handsomely as I could . But commonly when I had chang'd the fashion of them , in the duske of the Euening I would get me vnto the Gradas , and there barter them away , either for other Ware , or ready money , as others did .

This kinde of trading my Mother was not so well pleas'd with , shee did His Mother and ●…e part . not like well of it ; as well , for that she had neuer vs'd it in all her life ; as also , for that she would not willingly now in her old Age , runne the hazzard of so foule an affront .

Where-vpon , shee resolued with her selfe , once more to open shop , and see what good she could doe by her old Trade ; shee , and the young Wench , She followes her old course ; and ●…e ●…is . ( which she liu'd withall before ) being agreed to become partners , and equally to share all gaines betweene them . O how glad was shee , when shee saw my Mother come within her doores , how did she hugge and imbrace her , as if shee had brought in the Indies with her ; or were the onely Physician to recouer the sicke and decayed estate of her low-brought fortunes , hauing no such vtterance of her Ware , nor nothing the like doings now , as when shee liu'd with her ! I ( my Mother being now gone from mee ) quickly brought my selfe acquainted with some other good fellowes , with whom I might merrily passe my life , till fortune should change , and the times grow better . These my Camerades , I fitted them with inuention , plotted their businesses for them , assisted them in all occasions with my person , went along with them to the Townes and Villages neere adioyning . And whatsoeuer else we did chance to light vpon by the way , wee did neuer likely misse , in some of the backe Courts belonging to their houses , a good Buck of Cloathes , which together with their Flasket , wee made to vanish and dis-appeare in an instant .

We had in the Suburbs , and the Triana , certaine knowne houses , places of purpose for receit , where , without entring into the Citie , wee did pitch our Pikes , and make a Stand. There did we dry our cloathes , and being Theeues , & their cunning carriage . cleane washt , and handsomely folded vp , by little and little wee conuay'd them into the Citie , one while through the gates , another while ouer the walles , after mid-night was past , when the Iustice had done walking the Round , and was retyred home . For those garments of Cloth and of Silke , which by our industrie we had purloyned heere and there , as we could come to lay hands on them , we had knowne Brokers for them , to whom we sold them at a reasonable good price , losing little or nothing of what they were worth , which being once deliuered vp into their hands , they well knew that they would passe for currant , as goods that had beene gotten in a iust warre , and were their crafts-masters in altering the forme and fashion of them , to the end that they might not be knowne , for feare of after-claps . For we had no other obligation , but to giue them good wares for their money , dry , and well-conditioned , putting it within the doores of their houses free from taxe and tallage , and all other paiments , leauing them to bee freely inioyed by them . Your cleane white linnen had quicke dispatch , in regard of the good conueniencie that was offered vs to come easily by it ; as also for that it was very good chaffer , to trafficke away with strangers . And in this manner did we maintaine our selues brauely , and went well & cleere away with it .

One time ( I remember ) in the Winter , there was such a continued raine without intermission , that none did dare to goe out of doores ; so that the owners of those houses , keeping themselues within , all commoditie of visiting them was taken away from vs ; whereby money beganne to grow scant with vs . It was my hap at that time , as I was passing along through a certaine street , that I espide all the fore-part of a house quite falne downe to the ground . I askt whose house that was ? They told mee it was a Gentle-womans that was a Widdow . I went , and sought her out , and desired her , That seeing there was no body dwelt in her house , she would giue mee leaue to goe in , and lodge there , promising her to looke carefully vnto it . She ( good Woman ) being afraid lest the whole house should come tumbling downe about my eares , told mee ; That I were best take heed what I did , least the house should chance to fall . As for that ( I answered againe , it made no great matter , for that there was an vpper roome ( which as I conceiu'd ) was strong , and sure inough , where-into I might safely retire my selfe : telling her besides ; That such as were poore ( as I was ) had no cause of feare , or losse ; life being to them rather a burthen , then otherwise ; and was the thing , which of all other , they could best spare . Where-vpon , very willingly she gaue me leaue so to doe . And I presently , without any more adoe , got mee in , and within some foure dayes after , there was not a doore , which I had not vnhindged , nor a locke , which I had not ripped off .

The next day after , I got me into the street of San Saluador , and there I caůs'd it to bee openly cry'de at the Crosse , that whosoeuer would buy foure Guzman robs a Widdow of her Tyle-stones ; and how ? or fiue thousand Tyle-stones , he should repaire vnto me ; for I had authority to sell them vnto them . At that time , there was not a Tyle to be got in all the whole Towne for any money . Anon after came posting vnto mee three or foure Masons and Brick-layers , and happy was he that could come first , all of them earnestly striuing , which of them should haue the bargaine out of each others hands , and were ready to goe together by the eares about it .

Well , they came to agreement with mee for fiue Marauedis a Tyle ; and bringing them to the house , I made show of them vnto them ; telling them that I was the Mayor-domo , or Steward of the house , and that my Mistresse was minded to pull it quite downe to the ground , and build it all new after another manner . Besides these of mine , which I made my selfe Master of for the time , I shewd them others of our next neighbours , ioyning house to house with vs , being so neere the other , as they seemed to be fellowes , which likewise they were to haue away with them . They gaue me six hundred Royals in good ready coyne , vpon condition , that I should make vp my tale of Tyles , to the full number of fiue thousand ; telling me , that the next day they would come and fetch them away .

When I had my money , I hasted away to the Mistresse of the house , and said vnto her ; that it was great pittie , that she had giuen leaue to her Mayor-domo , to make sale of all the doores , and tyles that couered her houses . Whereupon she grew into a great rage , and kept a foule coyle about it , saying , She had no Mayor-domo , nor yet knew , who had any such authoritie to doe it . Thereupon I told her ; That your Worship then may know , who it is that takes this vpon him ; I haue beene already commanded to get me out of the house , and that I must haue nothing to doe there any more . Wherefore I must be inforced to looke out a lodging else-where . For to morrow very early , those that haue bought the Tyles , will come to carry them away . Your Worship may be pleased to send some body thither , or to take the paines to goe your selfe , and then you shall see what hath passed . This said , I tooke my leaue of her ; and the next day following , standing aloofe off , leaning against the corner of a Wall , I kept my selfe close , to see the stirre that would bee about this businesse ; and I can assure you , it was sport alone , and was able to make as many as beheld it , to breake their hearts with laughing , to see how busie the Tylers were , in vntyling the house , and how the poore Gentlewoman bestirr'd her selfe , to defend her owne . In conclusion , shee exhibited a Complaint against the poore Tyler , and did not only take away the Tyles from him , but also made him pay the price of her doores and lockes . This caus'd me for some few dayes to keepe my selfe close within doores , hauing a good fire , and laughing in my sleeue , till the storme was ouer-past , and that they had giuen ouer looking after me .

One day , there was a great feast in San Augustin ; and because such kinde of meetings made for vs , I got me thither . Where I perceiu'd , that a Gentleman had good store of money loose in his left Pocket , on that side where his Rapyer hung . Now , when he came into a place , where there was a great Guzman picks a Gentlemans Pocket . presse of people , and that there was much thrusting and crowding one another , I did gently lift vp his Hangers , and thrusting in my hand , did nimbly diue to the bottome , letting not so much as one Royall escape my fingers . But the vnquiet motion of those that were about me , hindred my hand , being so full as it was , to carry it away cleanly , by meanes whereof a great deale of it fell downe vpon the ground . And for that the Cloyster was pau'd , it made a great gingling ; With that I let all goe , and putting my hand into my Pocket , in a trice I tooke out my Handkerchiefe , and crying to the people , that they would for Gods sake giue backe , and make a little roome , for that in pulling forth my Handkerchiefe , I had shed all my money . All very kindely did as I desired them ; and the good honest Gentleman , whom I had thus robd , moued out of charity , hearing the pittious moane that I made , crying out , that I was with these moneys to pay my Merchant , stooped downe with me to the ground , and holpe me to gather it vp , till I had all to the last Royall . I gaue him thankes for his paines , and getting out of the throng , I went home well contented . This was that Knife that cut my throat ; this poore little theft , was my finall perdition and vtter vndoing ; being the last that I did , and for the which I paid dearer then all the rest . For albeit heretofore I had beene taken in the like manner , yet , for all those stormes , I arriued at last in a safe Hauen . With money I could negociate what I list my selfe ; and there , and in euery place , there is no other talke , then how a man may make a shift to liue , and to get where-withall to maintaine his port ; this was , is and will be the practice as long as the world is the world ; Iudges haue hands to take ; and Malefactors money to giue . Euery man ( you know ) would faine liue by his place . But now those Trumpes would doe me no good , for I had renounced them long agoe . When I was flush of money , I would seeke to furnish my selfe afresh , before they were spent , for preuentions-sake . I would make new prouision ; for as long as I could out of mine owne abilitie , supply my necessities and wants , I did not seeke after incumbrances , or to draw sorrow vpon my selfe . I had in a corner some Purses , that I had cut , and some pretty little strange pieces , that I had met withall . I made choyse of one that I lik't best of , and caus'd it to be handsomely trim'd vp , and putting into it sixe Crownes , in three Doblones of gold , fifty Royals in Plate , a siluer Thimble , and foure Rings ; I carryed it to my Mother , and shew'd her euery thing particularly by it selfe , vsing therein a great deale of leisure , pawsing well betweene euery parcell : I likewise did set downe the same in writing vnto her , to the end that she might learne it without booke , and not misse one letter of the lesson that I had taught her : for a good memorie is all in all ; and that which in this businesse did most of all import vs . And hauing well instructed her in that which she was to doe , when shee was to Guzman craftily coozens a Preacher , and gets a good almes , and how he did it . come afterwards to repetitions , I got me to the Cell of a certaine famous Preacher , who was a good man , and a holy , and reputed and reuerenced of all men , as if he had beene some Saint , and said vnto him ;

Reuerend Father , I am a poore stranger in this place , I am come hither to this Citie , and am at this present in great want and necessitie ; I desire to accommodate my selfe , if I could light vpon some honest house , where I might liue peaceably and quietly for my soules health ; this is the only thing that I desire in this world ; as for any set wages , I shall not stand much vpon that . For so as I may haue honest cloathes to my backe , ( I care not how meane , so they be whole , ) and some set Commons , ( though neuer so poore ) to passe ouer this miserable life , I should well content my selfe there-withall , without either hope , or desire of any farther profit . And albeit I am in this wretched estate as you see , and that I am nothing but rags ; in so much that for lacke of decent and seemely cloathes ( being so ill clad as I am ) I shall not happely light vpon any , that will take me into his seruice ; and albeit I could for the present be able to helpe my selfe , and supply this my necessitie by an occasion , that is now offred vnto me to relieue my wants , yet I hold it better to suffer penurie , and to relie vpon a hopefull expectation of Gods helping hand ( who will at one time or other pittie the distressed state of the poore ) then by offending his diuine Maiestie , in vsurping vpon the goods of my neighbour . God forbid that other mens Purses should free mee from my corporall labour , leauing to my selfe a guiltie and condemning conscience .

I got me this morning out of my lodging , for to seeke some worke , whereby I might gaine me bread to put in my mouth , and it was my good hap to finde this Purse in the midst of the street : I tooke it vp , and went to looke what was in it . And when I perceiu'd it was money , I presently shut the Purse , fearing left mine owne weaknesse might draw me to doe an vnlawfull Act. I shall intreat your Fatherhood , to take it into your hands , and being that you are next Sunday to preach , that you wil publish the same to the people . It may be , that the Owner thereof may be present there , or by others report chance to heare of it , who peraduenture may haue as much , if not more need of it then I haue . Much good may it doe him with it , for I will not inioy any other goods , saue only such , as his diuine Maiestie may be best serued by me .

The honest Frier , when he had heard me out , and saw the heroicall disposition that was in me , tooke me to be rather a Saint , then a man . And he did so much honour and reuerence me for it , that there only was wanting the kissing of my garment : and in a heauenly kinde of language , he thus spake vnto me :

My deare brother ; giue hearty thankes to almighty God , that hee hath conferr'd vpon you so cleere an vnderstanding , and the knowledge of that little esteeme which we are to make of the goods of this world , and assure your selfe , that he , that hath communicated vnto you this his holy Spirit , will ( as he hath promised in his holy Word ) prouide for you , and minister such things vnto you , as his diuine wisdome shall thinke fit and needfull for you . He , who to the poore least little Wormes , and all your small fleshlesse and bloudlesse Vermine ( as your Ants , Flyes , Caterpillers , and the like hurtfull creeping things , that crawle vpon the earth ) is not wanting , but careth for them , shall much more be mindefull of you , and supply you with all those things , that he shall see you stand in need of : not only freeing you from these your present miseries , but farther increasing your ioyes , and his blessings vpon you . This action of yours , is a supernaturall and diuine worke , which strikes admiration into men , and stirres vp those Angelicall spirits of heauen , to sing forth a thousand Hymnes of praise and thankes-giuing , that such a noble creature was borne for the glory of God , and the good of the world . This is his gift , and none but his , acknowledge it , and magnifie his praise by speaking good of his holy Name , and perseuering in vertue .

I shall doe as you would haue me , and see you returne againe vnto mee some day in the next weeke ; for I hope in God , I shall bee able to doe you much good , and procure some fauour to be be shewne vnto you .

When this good man had made an end of these his holy words , my heart there-with ( me thought ) was quite pierced thorow , and began to bleed within me ; for considering the greatnesse of his Sanctitie and sinceritie ; and on the contrary , of my roguerie and villanie , who by such vile and wicked meanes , should goe about to make him the instrument of my thefts ; and the more to colour the businesse , I let fall a few feigned teares ; this holy Frier , thought I had shed them for Gods sake , and there-vpon began likewise himselfe to grow somewhat tender .

This matter rested thus till the next Sunday following , which was All Saints day ; and when he came to preach , he spent the greatest part of his Sermon in this businesse of mine , indearing that Act so much the more , for that it had proceeded from a subiect so much necessited ; and did exaggerate it so to the heighth , that he moued all those that were there to compassion , and made them the willinger to doe me good . So they repaired vnto him with their almes , which they powred forth in a plentifull manner .

On Munday morning , my Mother came to the a a Portaria in your religious houses , is that gate or Porters lodge , belonging to the Couent . Couarruuias . Portaria , and askt for that holy Father ; saying , that she was to speake with him about an earnest piece of businesse . The Porter , who perceiued how desirous shee was to come to the speech of him , went in to call him , and presently brought him vnto her . Whom she no sooner saw , but taking hold of his hands , and his Habit , kneeling downe before him , and offring to kisse his feet , told him ; That the Purse was hers , desiring him for Gods sake , that she might haue it againe . She acquainted him with all the outward markes of it , as also with the particular and remarkeable pieces that were in it , as one that had well studied the Case . Where-vpon the Frier , without any more adoe , did deliuer it vnto her , knowing the tokens to be true .

When my Mother had the purse in her owne hands , shee opened it , and taking out one of those three Doblones that were in it , she gaue it to this holy Father to bestow vpon me for the finding of it : As also foure Royals , for two Masses to bee said for the Soules in Purgatorie ; and for that purpose shee re-commended them vnto him . Thus did shee recouer her purse , and brought it presently home vnto me , not wanting so much as a pins-head of all that was in it ; for I had likewise of purpose wrapt some of those pieces in little parcels of paper , that it might the sooner seeme to be some womans purse , who vse such kinde of fiddling and fooling with their money .

After this businesse was thus ouer-past about some two dayes after , vpon Wednesday towards the Euening , I went to visit my Frier ; who against my comming thither , had prouided mee a Coffer full of cloathes , which might very well out-weare ten yeeres , and spending money besides for some dayes . He gaue it mee with a cheerefull countenance , and willed mee to returne againe vnto him the next day : For hee had something else to say vnto mee , and hee did not doubt , but it should bee much for my good . I did so ; repairing vnto him at the time appointed : Then did he aske mee , whether I could write or no ? I inform'd him of my sufficiencie in that kinde . Wherevpon he told me , that there was a certaine Gentlewoman , whose Husband was in the Indies , who did much desire to haue such a one as I was , to follow her businesse , and to haue a care to husband her estate both in the Citie , and in the Country , and to bee true and faithfull in those things that she should commit to my charge ; and that therefore I should deale plainely with him , and truely tell him , whether I could like of this course or no ? for that , according to my answere , he should seeke , or not seeke to settle mee there , as hee saw I stood affected .

I ( after that I had giuen him thankes ) said vnto him ; My good father , that which appertaines to my personall paines , to my sollicitude , diligence , and fidelitie , where-with I ought to serue her , this I am able to tender vnto you ; but I must tell you withall , that I am not of this Countrey , nor haue any knowne acquaintance in these parts . And therefore , if this Gentle-woman shall put her goods into my hands , and that I must haue the disposing of them , she will expect that some body shall bee bound for my truth ; but I am not able to giue her any securitie ; and this is likely to be the onely rub that I know . I leaue it therefore to your fatherly consideration , what is to be done in this case , crauing your aduice therein . He told mee , that he would bee my Surety ; and that if that were all that I stood vpon , that stoppe should not damme vp the way , wishing me not to forgoe so fayre an offer . I accepted it very willingly . For I saw , that by this meanes , my businesse was in a good forwardnesse , and would finde legges to goe well on with it . For there is not any thing , that doth sooner deceiue a iust and an honest-minded man , then the simulated sanctitie of a wicked and counterfet Rogue .

CHAPTER VII .

Guzman de Alfarache , being preferr'd to a Gentlewomans seruice , robs her ; Vpon this theft hee is apprehended , and condemned to the Gallies during life .

SO great is the force of Custome , as well in the roughnesse of Of Custome , and the force thereof . troubles and afflictions , as in the smooth waters of happinesse and prosperitie , that some ease in the miserable , doth lighten the loade , and doth in some sort helpe to make them seeme more facill in their sufferance ; but the greater burthen lights vpon those that haue liu'd well and happily ; there is no griefe to this ; comfort hardly takes hold on them : Fortune cannot doe a man more harme , then when she hath inuested him with a habit of Happinesse , to dis-robe him thereof , and that disgracefully : for this vn-expected priuation makes it the more insupportable .

This Custome is that vncontrouled Lord , that prescribes , and proscribes Lawes at his pleasure ; infirming some , and confirming others ; ratifying this , and dis-annulling that . He ( like a powerfull Prince ) prohibits heere , and establisheth there ; and consequently , to that side , where-vnto he leanes , he carries all after him , as well in the pursuit of Vice , as in the practice of Vertue . So that , if he apply himselfe to goodnesse , he easily runneth the danger of losing it ; and adhering to that which is euill , it will hardly afterwards be rooted out . There is no force that can subdue it ; but hath power & command ouer all humane actions .

Some haue called Custome a second Nature ; but experience teacheth vs , that its power is greater then that of Nature ; For Custome will ouerthrow Nature with her little finger . She is no body in her hands : if she affect sowre and bitter things , with such artifice doth shee conserue and sweeten them ; that as if they were not bitter at all , she makes them to become sweet and pleasant . But if she clap in close with Truth , and linke her selfe in League with her , she is then the mightiest Monarch that is , and her Fort is inexpugnable . Who but she makes the poore Shepheard to liue alone by himselfe in the solitarie fields , in the depth of the low Vallies , and on the tops of high Mountaines , amidst Bushes , and Thornes , Woods , and Rocks , opposing himselfe against the vnmercifulnesse & cruelty of a sharp and rigorous Winter , suffering terrible Stormes , continuall Raines , bitter Windes , and piercing Ayres ? And in the Summer , a parching , and scorching Sunne , which doth as it were rost , and sindge the Trees , burne Stones , and melt Metals ? And its force being so great , that it tameth the fiercest and wildest beasts , and those that are most venemous , bridling their fury , and allaying their poison , Time at last ouercommeth Custome ; it is he , and none but he , that works vpon it , and to him onely it is subiect .

For comparing Custome with Time , her long and strong prescriptions are Custome must yeeld to Time . but as Spiders webs , made to catch an Elephant : For , if Custome be powerfull , Time is prudent and wife . And as Wit goes beyond Strength ; so Time subdueth Custome . After night , comes day ; after light , darknesse : They tread one vpon the heeles of another ; and the shadow that followes after the body , and growing greater and greater , contests with him for superioritie . The fire wageth warre with the Ayre ; the Earth , with the Water , and all the Elements goe together by the eares , and are at a perpetuall enmitie one with another . The Sunne generates the Gold , it giues it its essence , and its life . In like manner , Time pursues , prosecutes , and fortifies Custome . It makes and it marres , working wisely with silence , according to the selfe-same order , as she is wont by continued drops , to hollow the hardest stone .

Custome is of others , not ours ; but Time is our owne . It is hee that discouereth the thread , manifesting what is most secret , and by the fire of occasion , maketh an essay and tryall of his Art . By experience , hee teacheth vs the quilates and aloy of that gold , & sheweth vs the end where-vnto his pretensions tend ; And declar'd himselfe at last to bee one , that neuer tooke any pitie of me . For , in a very short space , he made that publike , which I had laboured with all diligence to keepe hid and secret . All that which hath been said , was verified truely of my selfe in its proper termes and cases . O how often treating of my businesses , trading of my wares , putting money out to vse , framing nets to catch fooles , by raising of my prices , selling my commodities farre dearer to him that went vpon trust , then him that paid ready money , carrying alway my Beads in my hand , my countenance compos'd , and still the same ; with a Truely , and a Verily in my mouth ( from whence neuer any truth yet came ) I did openly ( according to my old Custome ) coozen and steale from as many as I had to doe withall ! but Time did discouer all my rogueries .

How often , and by how many , haue I beene heard to say ; I promise you The common course of Tradesmen . Sir , that it stood me in more , I cannot affoord it you at that price , I vow and protest vnto you , that I get not a Royall by you , in all this whole parcell of Wares that you haue bought of me ? I may goe shut vp my shop , if I make many such markets . And if I haue let you haue it better cheape then I could affoord it ; it is because I am to make some payment of moneys , and if it were not for that , you should not haue them at this rate . And the same course I tooke in a thousand other things of the like nature , not hauing any other vse then for moneys ; more then from their hands to mine , to gaine a hundred in a hundred .

How often likewise , when I was in my prosperitie , during this my good Guzman deliuers some things worthy our consideration , but to be auoyded by vs . fortune , and studying dayly to grow greater and greater ( onely that I might get my selfe a good opinion in the world , meerely for vaine-glory , and not for the loue of God : for I did not so much as dreame vpon him , nor thinke vpon any thing else , saue onely to be well thought of , and to haue the peoples eyes vpon me , who taking me to be a charitable minded man , and a giuer of almes , would gather there-vpon , that I was a man of a good Conscience , and that I had a care of my soules health , and therefore might the better trust me ) did I cause a great number of poore , morning after morning to come to my doore , and keeping them there two or three houres , that there might be good notice taken of them , and seene ouer and ouer by those that past along by my house , did I afterwards send away with ( God hee knowes ) a poore slender almes , whilest with that no nada , that thing of nothing which they receiued from me , I did gaine my selfe a good reputation , which like a stalking horse , I made vse of , the better to get other mens goods into my hands ? How often haue I diuided a loafe of bread in twaine , ( when I was no whit hungry , but as full as my belly could hold ) and of that which remained , as if it were a thing to be lost , or to be cast away to the dogges , did I part in a thousand pieces , and bestow it afterwards on the poore ? Nor did I giue it vnto those , who , I knew had most need of it ; but to those , by whose mouthes , I knew , it would be most spoken of , and divulged to the world . And how often ( hauing a bloudy heart , and a damnable intention , being naturally cowardly , timorous , and feeble ) did I pardon , and put vp iniuries , putting them in publike to Gods account , mine owne thoughts secretly condemning me , did I in secret dissemble them , not sticking to say in publike , God be thanked for it ; when I was truly inwardly offended , and that no other thing in the world did hinder my reuenge , but that I was fearefull , and found my selfe vnable to put it in execution ? But the coales thereof were aliue , and did burne within my soule , whose flames I had much adoe to suppresse . How often at other times , did I shew my selfe an abstinent and orderly faster , not for any other thing in the world , then to seeme to bee such a one , and that I might spend lesse , and spare the more ? But when I did eate at another mans cost , or spend vpon another mans Purse , I did then swallow downe my victuals like a Cormorant , then I had a Wolfe in my belly , and was still afraid , that I should neuer haue enough . I did continually visit the Churches , I would often both goe and send to the Prisons , only to get my selfe credit amongst the Officers there , and such other Ministers as belonged vnto them , and not for to doe any good offices for the Prisoners , or any gratefull worke vnto God . But rather to the end , that if it should be my ill hap at one time or other to come thither , being formerly knowne by them , they might vse me the more kindely , and beare me the better respect . If I repaired to the Hospitals , if I went vpon Pilgrimage , if I did frequent places of Deuotion , kissing , nay , gnawing as it were the Altars , out of a hungry zeale ; if I would not lose a Sermon , nor a Iubilee , nor any publike deuotion , all those steps that I trod , and all that paines that I tooke , were only directed to the getting me a good name , to the intent that vnder the colour thereof , I might the better coozen my neighbour , and take his cloake from off his backe .

Moreouer , I must not forget to tell you , that diuers things were now and then told me , and those very secret ones , touching such , or such a person ; the which were kept so close , that when afterwards , when I did chance to talke with those persons , whom they concerned , counselling them to leaue off such and such courses , or rather correcting and reprouing them for it , they imagined of me , that I had come to the knowledge of them by some diuine reuelation . And so by indirect wayes , and a seeming kinde of holinesse in mee , I gaue them to vnderstand their faults : by which meanes , I got my selfe a great deale of reputation , especially amongst the women , who after these things , and Gypsies , runne as swift as the winde ; being facill in beleeuing , and nimble in publishing . Out of whose mouthes , my praise and commendation went spreading it selfe abroad .

Many a time and oft , when some poore body was willing to vse my helpe , making especiall choyse of me , as one that was well esteemed and reputed of all men , I would stand in the open street with a Dish in my hand , publikely begging Almes for him , of those that I was acquainted withall : and hauing got a pretty round summe of money , I gaue him the least part of it , and kept the rest to my selfe . I lickt vp the Creame , and left him the Whey .

When I was minded to doe some notable villanie , the first thing that I went about , for the better effecting of such a businesse , was to get me a very faire and goodly large Iesuiticall cloake , wherewith to couer it ; and for the better dissembling of it , I would put on all the gestures of outward Sanctity , as submission , mortification , and good example ; hauing the true turning vp of the white of mine eye , a sober looke , a graue vtterance , seldome spetting , but when I was to speake to the purpose , a broad-waking Hat , a little Band , and a lesse paire of Breeches . And with this kinde of habit , and posture , I bore the Ball before me , and tript vp the heeles of all those that stood in my way . Which if in nothing else , yet was it plainly to be seene in this ; that I had there-with so easily deceiued this holy man , this good honest Frier , that wisht me so well , nay had already done so well for me . Nor did I only doe him this harme alone , but a greater mischiefe followed vpon the necke of it . That he by no meanes lost that good opinion , which the world had of him : But say hee had not lost it ; and admit , that hee kept it whole and sound , as before ; yet , what a villanous instrument was I , and what iust cause had I giuen of preiudicing , and that in no meane measure , the credit and reputation of so honest and innocent a creature as he was ?

Well , he had now placed me with this Gentle-woman , being verily perswaded of me , that I would doe her all true and faithfull seruice , as he might very well presume by those particular Actions , which I had made shew of vnto him of this my rare and singular ( shall I say knauerie , or ) perfection ? Well , what so e're I was , I am sure he tooke mee to be a very honest man . He gaue his word for me , and trusted me with much of his owne : I could not lacke any thing , if it lay in his power to pleasure me , so good an opinion had he conceiued of me . She willingly ( vpon his recommendation ) receiu'd Guzman entertained into seruice by a Gentle-woman . me into her seruice . Shee trusted me with her wealth and her familie . Shee had ordained a very good lodging for me , prouided a delicate soft bed for me , and all other necessaries that were fitting for mee . Shee vsed mee in all things else , not as a seruant , but as a Kinsman , and as such a one , for whose sake , she did verily beleeue , that God would throw many fauours vpon her . Sometimes she would intreat me , to say an Aue-Mary for the health and good successe of her Husband . I made answer to all her demands , as if I had beene some Oracle , and with such a deale of mortification , that I made her many times to shead teares . By this meanes I came to coozen her , to rob her , and which was worst of all , to iniure her , by wronging her house . For you shall vnderstand , that this Gentle-woman had a certaine faire white slaue ( none I wisse of these blacke Moores , but a handsome well-fauoured Wench ) to her Maid-seruant , whom for a long time , I tooke to bee free-borne , and she likewise seemed to be a good , and holy creature . But in very truth , she was such a one , that she and I might very well shake hands ; of vs both , there was neuer a barrell better Herring : Well , were she better or worse then my selfe , be she what she will be , let it suffice you , she and I had tumbled together Guzman lies with his Mistresses maid . vpon one bed . I know not how we did smell out one another , that in so short a time , we had growne to be so well acquainted . For within some few dayes that I had beene in the house , there was no ho with her , I could not keepe her out of my Chamber , would I neuer so faine , but she would come in whether I would or no. To all the rest of the seruants , she seemed to be a Saint , and looked as though butter would not haue melted in her mouth ; but with me she shewd her selfe most loose and dissolute , as if she had beene bred vp in some Brothell house , or trained to this geare in the publike Stewes , yet stil carryed her selfe with that wisdome and discretion , that none of the house , except my selfe , no not her Mistresse could come to know , or the least way to suspect , that there was any such secret businesse betweene vs . Besides , she did so cherish me , and make so much of me , that my Chest was neuer without good store of Collations , and other sweet-meates . So that my Chamber , was like a Comfit-makers shop . She furnished me with a great deale of fine Linnen , as white as the curd , neatly folded vp , neat and sweet it was . And her Mistresse was glad to see it ; for she tooke vs both to be Saints . Shee likewise gaue me money to spend , not knowing whence she had it , nor how she came by it , or from whose hands she receiued it .

I had a glimpse of some things : but because I would not fall from those good tearmes wherein I stood , I would not be too curious in the search of them ; as well that I might not lose her company , while I continued there ; as also that I might thereby oblige her the more vnto me : I went intertaining her with faire words , and good hopes , telling her , that when time should serue , I would seeke to redeeme her out of her captiuitie , and afterwards make her my Wife . This seasoned the pot , made her rowze vp her spirits , and like a Spaniell , to wait diligently vpon mee , and to serue mee in any thing that she thought would please me . For , considering the loue which I feigned to be are vnto her , ( though she were a crafty subtill Wench ) she did euermore make sure account of me , as if I were not a free-man , and shee a Slaue . And yet not so free , as you thinke neither , hauing a Wife ( for ought I knew to the contrary ) still aliue .

My Mistris knew nothing concerning her owne estate and wealth , nor did finger any other moneys , then what I gaue her . All things that were in the Citie , went through my hands ; I likewise had the command of all her stocke abroad in the Country , and did take and gather in all the fruits and profits thereof . For my designe was , to make a reasonable good round booty , and so , get mee gone , to seeke out a new world . I had a great minde to goe to the Indies , and did but watch for an opportunitie to imbarke my selfe , howsoeuer it should afterwards fall out with mee . But I could not handsomely put this blow home . For my Mistris fore-seeing her certaine ruine , for that her Farmers and Tenants had told her , that they had paid in their rents to me ; the Shepheards , that I had sold her flockes ; the Baylife of her Vineyards , that I had conuaid all her Wines out of their Vaults and Sellars , where they were wont to be kept ; and that of all this one penny-worth thereof was not come to her purse ; she resolued with her selfe to communicate this matter in priuate onely to one Gentleman that was her neere kinsman . She then acquainted him with all that had passed , and what an ill account I had made her , intreating him to apply some conuenient remedy for the same . Hee , without speaking so much as a word thereof vnto mee , when as I was going one euening to cast vp my reckning , and to deuise with my selfe , how I might make cleane worke of all that my Mistris had , not thinking ( God wot ) on any such thing , being deuoyd of all care , and free from the least suspition of any such matter , the weather being hot , and my selfe very drowzie , I fell fast asleepe .

Now , whilest I was thus taking my rest , and thinking no body any harme , Guzman arrested and carried to Prison . an Alguazil comes in suddenly vpon mee , takes hold on mee , and without telling me why , or wherefore ; ( for that ( said he ) I should know hereafter at better leisure ) hee carried mee away to prison . The businesse was thus carried , that neither our house , nor the street , should bee in a hurry and tumult , by any stirre or coyle that I should make , when I should come to know by whose order I was apprehended , and committed . I went along very sad and heauy , and knew not in the world what to thinke of it ; one while deuising with my selfe , whether this my Commitment were by vertue of some Requisitoria , or Commission come out of Italy ? Whether it were at the suite of my Creditors in Castile ? Or for some of my new thefts , that I had so lately committed in that Citie , which perhaps for want of good carriage , were now come to light ? And albeit euery one of these had weight inough to presse downe my heart , and to make it sinke vnder so many , and such heauy burthens ; yet did it grieue me more then all the rest , that I should now lye no more at racke and manger , as I was wont to doe ; and that together with my good name , I should likewise lose my credit and estimation , and that men would not trust me , as they had done heretofore . But what remedie but patience ? But seeing it was no better , God bee thanked it was no worse . For this mis-fortune befell mee iust at such a time when as my Crowne was shauen , and had not any thing worth the speaking , that was to be found either about me , or at home in my lodging . For in regard that my Mother was a single woman , and liu'd alone by her selfe , by a little and a little , I carried all that I had scrap't together , to her , and she kept it for mee . Afterwards they broke open my Chest , but found nothing in it , but a Bull of the last yeere , and a few of old ragges . Where-vpon , they came to prison to take an account of mee ; giuing them so bad a one , as might well bee presumed from such a one as I was , who would alwayes receiue , but neuer pay .

I did not giue them such a Bead-roll , as they doe , that pray vpon their Beads . They laid great sums to my charge , but could meet with nothing but Blankes . They made strict inquisition to finde them out ; They looked heere , and they looked there , but they could not light vpon any thing , for I had not so much as one farthing of it in my custodie . When they saw that , they got them to the Frier , and gaue him a large account of the case how it stood with them .

He ( like a wise man ) did neither condemne , nor absolue me , till he should heare , what I could say for my selfe , that hee might the better iudge thereof , when hee had heard both parties . Hee came to the prison to visit mee , and talking with me about this businesse , I deny'de all , and stood stiffely to it ; affirming , that they had suborn'd false witnesses against me ; and that I was as innocent as the child that was new borne ; and that no man knew lesse thereof then I did . And therefore my hope was in God , and that hee would helpe mee ; and that , as he had freed Ioseph and Susanna ; so would he defend the iustnesse of my cause , and would not suffer the vprightnesse of my dealing to perish : Acknowledging withall , that this , and much more chastisement my sinnes had deserued , for many other my former offences , which I had committed against his diuine Maiestie .

The good religious man knew not what to doe , nor to which of vs hee should giue most credit Hee was much perplexed within himselfe , and stood doubtfull to which side hee should leane . But for the present , hee inclined to that part that was falling , seeking to support the weakest . He gaue me comfortable words , promising his best care and paines in my defence , recommending my businesses vnto God , who would ( when he saw fit ) free mee out of my troubles , and afford me his helping hand . Hee tooke his leaue of me ; from thence he went to the Escriuanos office , for to abonar , and make good my Cause , desiring him for charities-sake , that hee would haue an especiall care of it , and looke well into it , telling him that he was verily perswaded , that I was a religious honest man , one that feared God , and was a Saint vpon earth .

But when the Escriuano heard him lash out so farre into my commendation , laughing heartily thereat , hee pull'd forth some Processes , that had been put in against me , and making a relation vnto him of the particular points therein contained , laying there before him , what a lewd kinde of fellow I was ; the thefts that I had committed ; and the coozening tricks that I had vsed ; the poore Frier was ashamed of himselfe . There-vpon , this good holy Father , with all the sinceritie and simplicitie in the world , vp and told him , what had past betwixt him and mee , and by what meanes hee came to the first knowledge of mee , and how , and for what cause , hee gaue mee so much trust and credit ; not thinking ( good man ) thereby , to doe mee any harme ; but did onely tell him this , that he might bee the better perswaded of me , and that he himselfe had some reason to speake for me , and to doe me all the lawfull fauour he could .

When the Escriuano had heard this Tale , hee grew Hart-angry , and his soule was vexed at this my villany , to see that I had no more grace with me , but to make so graue a person a stale for my roguery ; and that I should put so grosse a iest vpon so good a man . He was herewith so incensed against me , and his choller did rise in that aboundance , that if hee had had the Law in his owne hands , I had presently beene hang'd out of the way , without any more adoe . He left the Office , and went presently to the Te●…e , or Deputy Lieutenant , to whom hee made a large relation of all the whole matter , and set it downe all vnder his owne hand , and finding himselfe as much affronted with this wrong I had done the Fryet , and that the parties aggrieued had past ouer all their power vnto him to prosecute it for them , as if it had beene his owne cause , they laid more and more to my charge , forming another new processe against me of farre greater aggrauation then the former ; and commanding me stricter imprisonment , willing the laylor to put me downe into the dungeon .

This vnfortunate day did not catch me so naked , that I wanted money to be able to draw out my thread to its length , and to wage Law with them . But the Prison is of the nature and qualitie of fire ; it consumeth all that 〈◊〉〈◊〉 . come vnto it , conuerting it into its owne proper substance . Large experiences had I made thereof , and by my account I found it to be a Winde-Mill , and a May-game for children . There is not any one that comes thither , but is a Miller , and grinds there ; crying out , that his imprisonment is but for a thing of nothing , a toy , a trifle ; when as sometime it so falleth out , that they are committed thither for three or foure murders , for a robbery vpon the High-way , or for some other the like foule and odious offences . It is a place where fooles set vp their rest , a forced tryall of a mans patience , a deare-bought experience , a too late repentance , a proouall of a mans friends , and a reuengement of his enemies , a confused Common-wealth , a short Hell , a long Death , a hauen of Sighs , a vally of Teares , a house of Mad-men , a very Bedlame , where euery one cryes out , and loues to heare himselfe talke of his owne foolish and wilde prankes . And all of them being guilty , not a man of them that will confesse he is faulty , nor that his crime is any thing heinous .

They that are prisoners , are like vnto your Grapes on a Vine Bower , which as soone as they waxe ripe , there is not a sprigge or bough of them which is not laden with Waspes , who insensibly ( they hauing no feeling of it ) sucke all the iuice and sweetnesse out of them , leauing onely the Caskes and Husks of them empty , hanging vpon the Arbour ; And as are the Grapes , so is the swarme ; if great and more , the more Waspes ; if few and small , the lesse . As it is with this Vine , and its Grapes ; so is it with those that are led to Prison .

The Officers and Ministers , that belong there-vnto , come thicke & threefold about him , clinging so close vnto him , and sucking so hard from him , that they neuer leaue him , till they haue drawne him dry , and taken all his pyth and substance from him . And when the poore Prisoner hath not longer where-withall to feede their hungry maw , and that they haue squeez'd all his sweetnesse out of him , they fly away from him , and forget him , as if there had neuer beene any such man , leauing him to himselfe poore , and comfortlesse . And this is as it were but a flea-biting , and a little euill , in comparison of a greater , which is too vsuall and common amongst them . For if the prisoner be poore , and haue no money , they presently pronounce sentence against him , leauing him starke naked , and vndone .

As soone as they consigne and deliuer him ouer to the Master Keeper , or Touching layors , and Keepers of Prisons . head-Iaylor , who hath the keeping and disposing of the vpper-Wards , and the best lodgings , they giue him that intertainment as his purse shall deserue . For that Keeper or Iaylor does like him that buyes ; who has no respect to the qualitie of him that sels , but to the thing that he selleth : so to him it matters not , whether the prisoner be more one , then another ; Noble , or base ; Gentleman , or Clowne ; all is one for that : He lookes onely vnto that which he giues him . When his Commitment is not a matter of importance , nor meriting corporall punishment , and is not of that heinous nature , as murder , theft , the foule sinne , and other such like , they leaue him at large to take the pleasure of the prison , alwayes prouided , that they pay him well for this his liberty . I was well vs'd at the first , ( for my cause was not criminall ) and handsomely lodg'd , before that I had giuen securitie either to satisfie , or answer to that debt , wherewithall I was charged . By this time they all knew me , and all of vs vnderstood one another well inough , we were all Camerades , and hayle fellow , well met , one with another . I gaue them content , and stayd below amongst them , talking and passing away the time with them , but had euermore an eye , to see if I could safely get to the doore , and stood still , watching an opportunitie , when I might conueniently doe it , and so giue them the slip .

But vpon my first apprehending , as soone as I was come within sight of The fashion of Attourneys , and Sollicitours , and the like Officers of your Courts of Iustice . the prison ; as also , after that I was committed , there presently flockt about mee twenty seuerall Proctors , Attourneys , and Sollicitours , ( who liu'd by the sinnes of the people ) who with their pen and Paper , ( which they neuer went without ) tooke both my name , and the cause of my imprisonment ; all of them making it a matter of nothing , and an easie suite to goe through with . One of them would tell me , that the Iudge was his very good friend , and did fauour all the causes that he brought before him ; another , that hee had a great interest in the publike Notary ; a third , that within two houres he would get me bailed ; a fourth , that my businesse was a toy , a meere trifle , a thing of no consideration in the world , and that for sixe Royals , hee would instantly vndertake to free mee . Euery one of them would make himselfe Master of my cause , saying , that it did properly belong vnto him , for that he had accompanied me , & come along with me , from the time of my Arrest . This man I intertained , for his plea of preuention , being vnwilling to crosse that Prouerbe ; of First come , first seru'd . Where-vpon I intreated him , that hee would call such an Escriuano , a friend of mine vnto me . Another , for that he was the first that put pen to paper , and had drawne my Petition for mee to the Teniente . But to my selfe , I laught at them all . For I knew them well inough , and the manner of their proceeding . For they onely liue by what they can get and wring from a man before-hand ; but afterwards you shall not draw them along , with two yoke of Oxen , they will so hang the Arse . And there was one of them that hauing a Power or Warrant to free a Thiefe , was not ashamed to aske him money for to make his Interrogatories , after that he should be condemned to the Gallies .

Thus , all of them striuing , which of them should be imploy'd in my businesse , there comes mee rushing in violently thorow the midst of them , a very bold and confident fellow , that thought to rule the rost , and to carry all away before him , one that had beene my Proctor heretofore in criminall causes , and said vnto mee ; What , Sir , are you heere ? I told him , yes . Which question he might haue sau'd ; for he saw I was sure inough . Then he askt me , What was the cause of my imprisonment ? When I had told it him , hee replyde : Tush , Laugh and be merry , Sir , take no care for this , it is a toy , a trifle , I warrant you Sir , wee will take order for this , and therefore let it neuer trouble you . Haue you any money , Sir , that I may carry it to the Escriuano ? I will poast presently with a Petition to the Teniente , that you may put in Sureties to answere the matter , and in the meane time to haue your libertie to follow your businesse . And if he shall refuse to grant you prouision in this Case , we will haue a Writ of remoue , to bring the matter into the open Hall , and those that assist there in Counsell , shall presently giue order for your release . I shall speake to one of them , who is my singular good Lord , and I dare pawne my word to you , that you shall not tarry heere aboue halfe a day .

When the others heard this , they said , Ha ? how now ? what 's this ? is the winde in that doore ? Heere is a pretty kinde of forme of framing a Petition withall my heart . Is this the course you meane to take ? Wee haue beene some twenty of vs and vpward , these two long houres and better taking paines in this businesse , and will you now take the same out of our hands ? Shall the hindermost dogge beare away the Hare ? Must he now follow the suite ?

My Proctor there-vpon , made them this answere ; My Masters , had you beene writing and labouring about this businesse these two moneths and more ; yet not withstanding vpon my comming vnto him , I am the man that must goe thorow with it . For this Gentleman is my very good friend , and I am to dispatch all his businesses . And therefore a Gods name ye may be gone ; and let my Clyent alone .

When they heard him say so , they replyde vnto him ; O what a sweet and seemely manner of negociating is this ? What a faire flourish does hee make ? Where has he washt his hands , that hee should shaue vs on this fashion , and carry away this cause so cleanely ? You may be gone , Sir , and it please you ; for this Gentleman knowes reason , and will intertaine him in his cause that he hath most minde to : and therefore what need so many words ? In conclusion , one said I ; and the other said no ; and in the end , they differr'd so long about it , that they grew at last so hot and so angry one with another , that they began to rip vp each others faults , and to tell ( without any other bodies help ) who they were ; there was not that spot in their practice , which they did not lay open to view ; nor that staine in their life , which they did not discouer ; shewing how , and in what manner they did coozen the poore prisoners , and picke their money out of their purses . Which was a Dialogue ( for those that heard it ) of excellent intertainment , and passing good mirth ; for that they were truthes , represented to the life . And this ( I assure you ) is a common Trade amongst them , and this coozening course they take at all houres , and with all persons , as well prisoners , as others .

Now , when this heat was ouer-past , and all was quiet ; I came to my old Proctor , intreating him to doe what was fitting , and I would see him well contented for his paines . I gaue him foure Royals to begin withall : which when he had fingred , I could see my friend no more in fifteene dayes after . I knew well enough before , what he meant to doe ; and that he had no other errand vnto me but this , to lick something from me , though it were neuer so little , the better to secure the seething of the Pot , against the next day following , and to haue where-withall to goe to the Market-place . But I was driuen perforce to make choyce of him , because I stood in feare of him : Who , for that he was wel acquainted with all my old causes , if I should haue refused him , or shewd him any but the least vnkindenes , & that he should haue taken a stitch there-vpon against mee , hee would haue discouered the pot of Roses , and throwne open the cloake that couered all my knaueries , and would in two houres haue heapt vpon me a hundred seuerall accusations . So that partly choosing him , ( by refusing the rest ) and partly leauing him , ( in the poorenesse of his Fee ) as wel to haue him hold his peace , as to get him to follow my businesse ; for I must haue paid some body ; I held it the best course to make him my Proctor , though this were not a businesse that required much following ; but did mainely consist on matter of money . But afterwards when I began to be examined , and thorowly sifted of that my audacious delusion , and imposture , which I had put vpon that good Religious Fryer , and that they came to compare cause with cause , then did I need a Proctor .

Now things began to goe on in good earnest ; they call'd mee vp , and went about to clap bolts on my legges : but those I redeem'd with my money . I paid the Keeper , who had the keeping of them , and the yong fellow , that was to put them on , had his Fee likewise of me . My Escriuano now often visits me ; my Petitions runne vp and downe from place to place ; Giue me thus much , sayes my Sollicitour ; Where is my Fee , quoth my Aduocate ? Thus by little and little , like so many Horse-leeches , they went sucking all my bloud from mee , till they had scarce left me one drop . So that now I was like a cluster of Grapes , that was quite dry'de away , and withered to nothing . Yet notwithstanding all these miseries , it is not fit , that I should passe ouer in silence , that which passed betwixt my Wench , and my selfe . For as much that euery morning , as soone as it was day , she rayned downe Manna vpon me ; in her I found some helpe , for that she furnished me with all things that were necessary for me ; and when the rigour of my imprisonment was vpon me , being sentenced by the Teniente to the Gallyes , she sent me a letter : which , for that it is a pleasant and a witty one , I thought good to make it knowne vnto you ; as also , because it is not amisse , to slacken the string , and vnbend the bowe , by recounting of something , that may serue for intertainment . Which letter spake after this maner :

To Sennor Guzman de Alfarache , my hearts-ioy , and my hopes comfort .

MY deare Loue ; ( though now to my great griefe , a poore condemned Slaue ) A letter of Guzmans wench lamenting his misfortunes . I write these lines to no other end vnto thee , saue only to perswade thee to cast away sorrowe , and to take comfort vnto thee . Let it suffice ( sweet-heart ) that I haue none ; and let me alone mourne for thee : for euer since Saint Iames his day , about two of the clock in the after-noone , when thou wast first apprehended whilest thou lay'st quietly asleepe , who ( hard-hearted as they were ) would not let thee take out thy nap , my Soule hath much sorrowed for thee . But that which farther increaseth my affliction , is ; that this sad newes is brought to day to my eares , that the Teniente hath adiudged thee to two hundred stripes , and tenne yeeres continuance in the Gallyes . God lash his shoulders for it with whips of wyer , and the knottiest , and seuerest scourges of his wrath ; Let him liue a slaue all the dayes of his life in the Gallies , and then rot , and dye . It well appeares , that he wishes thee not so well as I doe ; nor knowes the bitternes of those teares that I shed for thee . Little does he thinke how deare thy loue costs me .

Iuliana wishes me to tell thee , that thou shouldst foorth-with appeale from him . Appeale twenty times , and more ( if more shall seeme fitting vnto thee ) and take care for nothing ; for ( by the grace of God ) I doubt not , but all shall goe well inough in the end : And then , this Tyrannicall Teniente shall see ( though it grieue him ) that thou shalt not for euer remaine a prisoner to his pride : for I sweare and vowe vnto thee by this my a a Mulata , is a maid child , that is borne of a Negra , and a fayre man ; and so on the contrary . And because it is an extraordinary mixtur●… , they compare such a one is a Mule . Mulata face , that I will make him to remember as long as hee liues , the teares which hee hath drawne from mine eyes ; which haue beene so many , that I had much adoe to keepe them from the worlds knowledge ; And I should haue powred them foorth , till they should haue growne to be great riuers , had I not feared , I should haue beene drowned in them , and so neuer haue inioyed thee more . By the faith that I owe vnto thee , I will neuer cease weeping , till the fountaines of my teares swell so high , that I may come swimming vnto thee , and drawe thee out of that dungeon , where-vnto my Soule is chayned , and remayneth there prisoner with thee . Iuliana can tell thee , how I tore my haire , when I heard this bad newes . By her I haue sent thee twenty Royalls , that thou may'st followe thy suite , be as merry as thou may'st , and that thou would'st thinke on me , howbeit I knewe the time , when such ceremonies needed not betweene thee and mee : For had I beene but a minute of an houre from thee , staying no longer away , then while I had put a fewe coles vnder the pot , thou didst thinke it a thousand yeeres . Remember ( my sweet Slaue , my pretty Cage-bird ) that I both loue , and adore thee : And receiue this greene girdle from my hands , in token of the good hope which I haue , that mine eyes shall quickly see thee set free . And if for to supply thy wants , it were needfull that I should be sold , brand this my face with two hot yrons , and set a Slaues marke in eyther cheeke , and make sale of me in the open market : for assure thy selfe , I shall esteeme it the greatest happines that can be fall me , that my bondage may worke thy freedome .

Thou tell'st me , that Soto , thy Camarade is ill , and was neuer well , since the Hang-man dealt so roughly with him , and strand the strings so hard , that he made him change his note ; racking as much from him , as there needed no farther confession ; it grieues me to the very heart , that a man of his spirit , should be so cow'd by such a vile and base fellow , that for very feare , he should be forced to confesse , not only his owne , but other mens faults . Commend me vnto him ( though vnknowne ) and tell him , that I am hartily sorry for him ; share part of these Conserues with him , which I send you , which ( my deare Loue ) I haue made a shift to saue for thee .

Tomorrow is our kneading day , wherein we must mould vp our bread , and put the loaues into the Ouen ; then shall I make thee such a friendly cake , and butter it so finely for thee , that thou shalt not be ashamed to bid thy best friends to the eating of it .

Send me your foule linnen , and shift dayly , that you may keepe your selfe cleane and sweete : For since that these mine armes cannot imbrace thee , they shall tyre and weary out themselues in thy seruice ; as being most willing to doe any thing , that may giue thee content . My Mistris sweares that shee will hang thee , because she sayes , you haue rob'd her , of you knowe what ; but I am sure , you haue rob'd another Prouerb . of more then she ; of I knowe what , you knowe ; To a wise man , a a A Buen entendedor , pocas palabras . a word is sufficient .

If Usher Gomez shall come to see thee , talke not with him , or if thou doest , be very circumspect , what thou sayst vnto him : For he is a man , that carries two faces vnder one hood ; He seekes to insinuate himselfe into other mens bosomes , only to fift them : And besides , he is a great friend to a cup of wine ; And a drunken tongue ( which I neeed not to tell thee ) will blab out all it knowes . I aduertise thee of all : And because this is for no other end , I heere end : yet neuer end to pray vnto God , that he will preserue thee for me , and that he will free thee out of this filthie dungeon . From this thy chamber , about an houre before mid-night , my cont emplation ( sweet heart ) being solely and wholy bestowed on thy best-beloued selfe .

Thy Slaue till death .

This wenches oyle maintained the weeke aliue , all the time of my troubles , which otherwise would haue gone out . For I liu'd at a great charge , my expences were many , and though I had made my haruest , and gathered a great deale together , yet all was melted away , like salt in water , or butter against the fire . My Mother likewise , when she sawe in what bad tearmes my suite stood , told me ; That she was rob'd of all that she had ; but as I did conceiue ( and I thinke truly ) her meaning was to hold that fast which she had , when she saw it was to no purpose to let it goe . Whereupon , I was inforced to doe as the rest did , and to follow the currant . My plea still went on , and I wanted money to maintayne my cause . I could not corrupt the Escriuano , ( for I had nothing , where-withall to bribe him ) The Iudge , he was so highly incenst against me , that there was no hope of working him ; My Proctor , hee slept in the busines , and would not stirre a foote ; and my Solicitor fled as far from me , as his legs would carry him . There was now no more iuyce in my bunch of grapes , the Wasps were now gone their way , and had left me all alone ; they had pronounced Sentence against me , the effect whereof was , That I should be set vpon an Asse , and so ride stript to the waste , round about the Towne , receiue so many stripes ; the Cryer proclayming my offence before me ; and this done , to remaine for six yeeres in the Gallyes .

When I saw I must bee made a Gally-slaue , and that there was no redemption of this my punishment , I put on a brazen face on the matter , and grew carelesse of any mans either sight , or censure . I playd my part without feare , or shame , as being now the Kings Slaue , and out of all other mens reach and danger , they hauing nothing more to doe with me . Yet was it some comfort vnto me , that my Camarade Soto was condemned to the like punishment , and that we should , like a couple of louing Curres , bee ty'de together in one payre of couples . And as wee were fellowes and Companions in one Prison , and in one and the same Dungeon , and had runne both of vs one and the same Carreere ; so was I very willing , that there might haue beene that good amitie betweene vs , and that true loue that ought to haue been ; which if he had beene the same man he should haue been , it had gone better both with him and me , then now it did . But ( as you shall see hereafter ) he playd the Traytor with me .

He was a notable squeeze-grape , a huge quaffer , his glasse should bee alway brim-full , and he would vp with it de profundis ; his vsuall draught was a large pint & a halfe : and hauing drunke liberally before he came to the rack , thinking that would haue made him lesse sensible of his paine , he confest at the first , whatsoeuer they would haue him . Seeing I had now receiu'd my doome , and that there was not any remedy , nor the least hope thereof , for my redemption , I was willing to try my fortune ; but I neuer had her yet to friend : So that it had beene a miracle , if she had not fayl'd me now . I feign'd my selfe sicke for some fifteene dayes , neuer came out of the dungeon , nor rose from my bed .

At the fifteene dayes end , hauing prouided my selfe of womans apparell , and hauing shau'd my Beard cleane away with a Razour , putting on those Guzman seekes to break prison . cloathes , casting a Mantle ouer them , and painting my face , dawbing it first with white , and then giuing it a little tincture of Red ; now when night was in , I past thorow the two vpper doores , that belonged to the Galleries , and neither of those Porters said a word , but let me passe quietly , yet were they both of them quicke-sighted inough , and had their eyes cleere and sound .

But when I came downe to the doore that opens to the street , and was ready to put my foot ouer the threshold , a blinke-ey'de Porter , that had but one Guzman preuented of his purpose . eye , ( would to God he had beene blinde on the other ) claps his arme athwart the Posterne , kept me backe , lookt vpon me , and presently knew me : Wherevpon , he shuts to the doore . I had prouided my selfe of a good short arming sword , one , that if need had been , would haue done the deed , which I carried closely about me , if I should chance to be put to my shifts , and haue occasion to vse it . But as ill lucke would haue it , I bore it about mee at such a time , when as it could doe me no good , nor stand me in any stead in the world . This was such an aggrauation of my fault , that my accusation was now made criminall .

Well , they turn'd me vp stayres , and fulminating a new Processe against me , Guzman condemned during life to the Gallies . they condemn'd me to the Gallies , during life . And it was no small courtesie , that they did mee , that they did not make mee ride in those cloathes vp and downe the Citie , as they had heretofore done the like disgrace vnto others . I thought to haue auoided danger , and fell vpon my death .

CHAPTER VIII .

Guzman de Alfarache is taken out of the Prison of Seuill , to bee carried to the Port , to be put into the Gallies . Hee recounteth that which befell him on the way ; as likewise in the Gallies .

I Am a Gally-Slaue , and am now come to the end , for which I was ordained , where-vnto my lewd courses were the meanes to bring mee . I must now leade that life , as the rest of my fellowes doe , who indure the like fortune . I must pull at a Rope , tugge at an Oare , and content my selfe with such poore fare , as others of my wretched condition are allow'd . I was one of the Band of the Braggards ; de los , de Dios , es Christo ; one of that company , who confesse Christ to bee God , and haue no other Cognizance of their Faith ; for their workes march vnder the Colours , and conduct of the Diuell . I put on my white linnen breeches , my colour'd Stockins , my cut Doublet , and my Holland Night-Cap ; all which my kinde and louing Mulata had sent me ; liuing in hope , that in time the Dice would turne , and that she might one day see me againe at libertie . What with the helpe that I had from her , and what with those my fees , that I recouered ( as due vnto me ) from those new Prisoners that came in , I led a fine gentle life , as also the life of a Gentile ; for such is the qualitie of such as I am , when they are admitted into such a famous schoole as that is , where such a deale of Roguery is profest .

I had now got some oyle to my Lampe , some money in my purse , partly out of other mens deuotions , and partly out of mine owne indeuours ; I did lend vpon pawnes , of euery single Royall I made dayly a a a Eight Quartos make a Royall : so that he made a halfe-penny and better , of euery sixe pence . Quarte profit ; I did such from those that were fresh men , and newly come in amongst vs ; not one of them that scap't my fingers , all that came vnder my hands paid soundly for it . When they were asleepe , I would play the wagge with them , putting the snuffe of a Candle on the top of their shooe , and holding matches of brimstone vnder their noses , or rolling a Card , let the smoke runne vp into their nostrils , till it were ready to choake them ; and a thousand other the like knauish tricks . For albeit God is there knowne , yet is hee not feared . They haue The wicked condition of the Gally-Slaues . no more respect vnto him , then if they were so many Pagans . And for the most part , those that come to the like misery , are Ruffians , and High-way robbers , a brutish and beastly kinde of people . And it must be either a great wonder , or mis-fortune , that such a one as I should come thither ; and when it so falleth out , the reason of it is , because God blindeth their vnderstanding , to the end , that by leading them this way , he may bring them to the acknowledgement of their sinne ; and that they may in time come to a clearer knowledge of him , learne to serue him , and so be saued .

There was a Ruffian , a notable shauer ( in my time whilest I was there ) who being condemned to death , and put into the enfermiria , or that quarter , A Tale of a Ruffian . where the sicke are cured ; whence he was to be taken forth the next day to be executed , seeing some of those that had the guarding of him , playing at three-hand Primera , he rose from his banke , he made to them as well as hee could , crawling along , with his two paire of fetters , and a great chaine ; and they asking him , whither he would ? Hee told them ; I come hither , to passe away the time a while .

The Guards that had the charge of him , told him , that it was fitter that he should betake himselfe to his prayers , and recommend himselfe and his Soule vnto God . Where-vnto , he answered , I haue pray'd already all that I can pray ; I haue not one prayer more left me . I haue no more to doe , then what I haue done already ; and therefore shufflle , and deale about , and fill out some Wine , and let the cup walke ; that we may wash away sorrow , and rid away that care , which is ready to choake my heart . They replyde , it was very late , and that the Tauerne doore was shut , and there was no getting in . Goe tell then ( said he ) the fellow that keepes it , that it is for me , and that 's inough ; I warrant you , hee will not deny me . And therefore no more words , my Masters , but play on , and follow your sport ; for I sweare vnto you , that I know not what will become of this businesse , nor what the issue thereof will be .

They dance all to this Tune . Others there are , that will haue their Head and Beard neatly trimm'd , that they may seeme the handsomer when they come to the Gallowes , and be said to be proper men , and well-fauour'd ; and will likewise take order to haue a fine cleane starcht-Ruffe , daintily and curiously set ; it seeming perhaps vnto them , that the wearing of that , and the bearing their Bigotes high , turn'd vp with hot irons , and stiffened with gums , should be their saluation , and bring them to heauen . And as in good Philosophy , mens complexions follow generally the goodnesse , or badnesse of their meats ; so may it likewise of the good or bad company that we keepe . Whence grew that Prouerbe : No a a Prou. No con quien naces , si no con quien paces . con quien naces , si no con quien paces . We must not iudge of men by their birth , but by their breeding . It is their conuersation , that must giue them their denomination .

Now I was one of these , and like a barbarous and ill-bred fellow , would faine imploy that little money which I had , in renting one of those (a) Bodegones belonging to the Prison ; but fearing a day , that they would on the sudden (b) Bodegon is a poore vittailing house . strike vp an Alarme , and so I might chance to lose all , I did not doe it ; and I thinke I did well in it . For now that wee beganne to make a number of some sixe and twenty Gally-slaues , & were grown so vnruly in the Prison , that there was no ho with vs ; the Keeper was halfe afraid , that wee would make some hole or other in the Meshe , and finde a time to get out of the net ; and therefore laboured all that hee could to be discharged of vs .

One Munday morning wee were called vp , and giuing euery one of vs a Testimoniall of his Sentence , wee were all chained one to another : And Guzman and the rest of the Gally-Slaues deliuered ouer to the Commissary . being thus threaded as it were vpon foure chaines , wee were deliuered ouer to the Commissary , who was to conuey vs by little iourneys to the Port , faire and softly , foot after foot , and as we could hale our haltred legges after vs ; our pace , like our irons , being very heauy .

In this manner went we out of Seuill , to the great griefe and sorrow of our Parents and Kinsfolke , and other our good friends , who went tearing their hayre , as we past along the streetes , and scratching their faces with their nayles , euery one according to the loue and respect which shee bare vnto her friend . And they on the other side , pulling their Hats ouer their eyes , went along like so many meeke and gentle Lambes , and not with that Lyon-like looke , and haughty carriage , as they were wont heretofore ; it was not any brauing now , or out-facing of the matter , that could doe them good . Arrogancie was out of request with them , and would not serue the turne . I cannot deny , but it did touch me for my part to the very quicke , it went to the heart of mee : especially , when I called to minde the merry life that I had led , the good state wherein I had liu'd ; if I had had but the grace to keepe my selfe well , while I was well ; and to see the misery , where-vnto now I was come .

Then did I begin to thinke with my selfe ; If this bee so painefull vnto mee already ; if this chaine doe so much torment me , that I can scarce indure it ; if I feele such trouble now , and if this befall me while the wood is greene , what will it doe , when it growes old and dry ? What torment will they feele that are condemned for euer to perpetuall paine ? Musing vpon these things , I past along thorow the streetes of Seuill , for my Mother did not come to accompanie me , nor was she willing to see mee . And I was the onely man amongst them all , that was Solus cum solo , left alone to my selfe .

We walkt along very leisurely , which ( God wot ) was slowly inough , yet as fast as we could conueniently ; for when my chaine was slacke , and I was offering to goe forward , my next fellow would oftentimes pull mee backe , which hee could not sometimes doe withall , and sometimes againe would stop of set purpose , as his necessarie occasions did require . Another , he was foundred with going bare-foot , and all the rest ready to sinke , they were so weary . Wee were men sensible of paine , as other men are , and being in that case as we were , none had more cause to sorrow then we ; yet amongst our selues our griefes were so equall , that we had but little aduantage one of another .

O the wretched and miserable state that we liue in , and to how many various and vnfortunate chances are wee necessarily obliged ! Wee came to a place called Las Cabeças ; and as we went on a morning from thence , wee had scarce gone halfe a League , but that one of our company had espide a farre off , a certaine yong fellow , who was going towards Seuill , with a great many fine little young Pigs , and giuing the word one from another , wee did presently battell-wise cast our selues into a Wing , as if we had been the Turkish Gallies ; and marshalling our selues after the manner of a halfe Moone , wee did in such an orderly fashion set vpon them , that the points of the Hornes meeting as it were before , and in a kinde of circle-wise inclining each to other , wee had shut in the Pigges on a sudden , and incompast them so , The Gally-slaues rob a poore fellow of his Pigges , that he was carrying to Market . that they could not get out from amongst vs , and in spight of the young fellowes teeth , doe what he could for his life , euery one of vs made purchase of a fat Pigge .

The fellow began to cry out aloud , making great exclamations , and intreating the Commissary , that for Gods sake , hee would take order that he might haue them againe . But hee seemed to be deafe , and would not heare of that eare , as one that was to haue the greatest share in this bootie ; and so wee past on along with our prey , leauing the poore Clowne to goe seeke his remedy else-where . Wee knew the worst of it alreadie , so that our care , and our pitie were much about one .

About noone , when wee came to our Inne where wee were to rest our selues , and with a little sleepe to passe ouer the heat of the day , the Commissary called to vs for the share that hee was to haue of this our theft : for , being that he was consenting there-vnto , the Accessorie was to haue as much as the Principall ; the Assentant , as the Assaylant . Hee commanded one of them to bee rosted for him ; where-vpon there arose a great stirre and tumult amongst vs , being ready to goe together by the eares , whilest we were arguing the Case , which of vs was to part with his Pigge . For amongst vs The Slaues matine about their Pigs . all , there were scarce three of vs that had the vse of reason .

When I saw the Mutiny , that was amongst them , and that in the carriage of this busines , he might ( and that iustly ) blame me the more , because my vnderstanding Guzman offers his to the Commissary . was more then theirs : I said vnto him ; Master Commissary , my Pigge is heere ready at your seruice , dispose of it as you please : And if you shall so thinke it fit , seeing heere is Guard sufficient vpon vs , may it please you to comaund them to vnchaine me , and I will take the paines to dresse it for you with mine owne hands : for I haue some reliques yet remayning of a good Cooke . He thankefully accepted of this my ciuill Compliment , and said vnto me ; Of all this company , that is heere vnder my charge , I must truely confesse vnto thee , I haue , since my first knowledge of thee , obserued in thee a certaine kind of noblenes , and free nature , which cannot but proceed from some good blood . I therfore thanke you for this your present , and take it kindely at your hands , and shall be very glad to eate it , as you shall order it for me . I was taken from the chayne ; & being recommended to the Guards , He dresses it for him . I call'd for such things as were necessary : but because the Inne was ill prouided of such things as I would haue had , to shewe my Cookerie , I could shew my skill no farther , then in the well rosting of it , with a fewe eggs battered together , and seasoned with a little pepper , & salt : I would haue made a pudding in it's bellie , but I wanted necessaries . I minced the liuer , & of that , and such other things as I could for the present , I made him sauce to his Pigge , which I knewe well how to doe .

At the same time some Trauaylours came in , to take their ease , who were not a little sorry to finde vs there : for that they were halfe afraid that their eares were scarce sure on their heads amongst such a company of Rogues as we were . The Table whereat they were to sit , wàs a long planke , neeere adioyning to a bench of stone : they were to eate altogether . The Commissary kindly saluted them , and they him ; and after a fewe Compliments were exchanged betweene them , they sate three in a file , and one of them taking his Port-mantua vnto him , and putting it betweene his legges , vnder the boord , he there likewise lay'd his Alforjas , or wallet , wherein he had Cheese , a Bottle of Wine , and a peice of a Gammon of Bacon ; and that he might the better take it out , he did thrust his Port-mantua a little forward , leauing the Alforjas in the midst betweene his legges . I , when I saw that he was so warie , began to suspect , that it was not without cause , and calling to the Hostesse for a Knife , I closely clapt it in betweene my arme , and my sleeue : And puting a great earthen Iarre full of water , vnderneath the boord , and in it , a Bottle of Wine ; that the Commissary might haue it fresh and coole , when hee should call for it ; as oft as I stoopt downe to powre out his wine , by little & little , I fell to fingering of the Port-mantua , till at last , hauing made a shift to vndoe all the Buttons , and giuing it a gentle slash close where the Chaine ranne along , that made all fast , I nimbly tooke out two little bundles , but somwhat Guzman filches two Fardles out of a Trauailours Port-mantua : And the maner how . weighty withall , which I presently conuay'd very handsomely into my Gally-sloppes , where there was Sea-roome inough for them ; and afterwards buttoning it vp iust in the same fashion as it was before , it was close and well , and not any signe to be seene of this theft that I had made .

When they had made an end of their dinner , the Cloth was taken away , and hauing paid their reckoning , away went these Trauailours ; and we likewise began to prouide to be packing : for we also were to be gone . Soto , my Camerade , was fastned to another Chayne , somwhat farther off from mee , Soto Guzmás Companion a notable Thiefe . then I could haue wish't it , which did not a little grieue me , because this distance did hinder our more priuate talke ; but before they brought me back againe to my Chayne , I came vnto him , and secretly deliuered vnto him those two bundles , desiring him to keepe them safe for mee , till we should meete with some better occasion , to knowe what was in them . He receiued them with a great deale of ioy , and killing his Pigge vnknowne to any , he thrust them both into the body of it , placing the intralls before the mouth of the wound , as well , that the bundles might not droppe out , as also to hide them Soto his cunning in the cleanly conuayance of this theft . thereby the better out of sight .

Now when they were going to put me to the Chayne , I intreated the Cómissary to doe me the fauour , that I might be filed next to this my old friend and acquaintance . He willingly granted my request ; so one was taken out of that file , and he and I were ranked together , that other and my selfe exchanging places .

We went lazily on along , as the fashion is , & as we were pacing these our leisurely steps , I rounded Soto softly in the eare , and said vnto him ; How now ( my Camarade ) what hast thou done with that which I gaue thee to keepe ? How hast thou dispos'd of it ? But he , as if hee had not knowne mee , or had not giuen him any such thing at all , made so strange of it , that hee made me to suspect , that according to the custome of that Country , hee had drunke a cup too much , and so might happely haue forgot it . Where-vpon , I went putting him in minde , when and where I gaue it him . But hee still denyde any such deliuerie . And in the end grew some-what hot and angry with me , asking mee , whether I were drunke , or well in my wits , that I should demand any such thing of him , or make him beleeue , that I had deliuered him either this , or that ? I vnderstand you not , I neither know you , nor it , nor haue anything of yours , and therefore all that I can say vnto you , is ; That for mee you must goe looke it . Nothing I had of you , and nothing are you like to get from mee .

You cannot imagine , nor am I able to expresse the great both anger , and sorrow that I had , that I should be so vnthankefully dealt withall , and receiue such hard measure from one , to whom I had done so many good offices , and lou'd so truely , as I did him . For , there was not that morsell of meat , that went downe my throat , whereof he had not his share ; nor that money in my purse , whereof I did not diuide halfe with him . And my purpose was , that he should likewise share with mee in this . But that hee should thus breake the Soto becomes an enemy to Guzman . bonds of friendship , and deny , ( and that so insolently , and impudently ) that I had euer giuen him any such thing ; this was it that troubled me ; this was it that vext mee to the very heart .

He was a man of an ill condition , his concoction was not good , and hee was so moued vpon these words of mine , and so out of all patience , that in a thundring voice he beganne to bolt out oathes and blasphemies , insomuch that the Commissarie was inforced to correct him with a Cudgell . I , relying on the fauour he had shewne me , intreated him to beare with him , because he was angry , and in choller , which was the cause of this his intemperancie . And he being desirous to know the cause of this his distemperature ; I began to apprehend with my selfe , that Soto would reserue all this for him ; and I made this reckoning with my selfe ; If I shall acquaint the Commissarie with How Guzman cryes quittance with Soto . that which had past betweene vs , it may bee , that though I should not haue all , yet at least , some part of the bootie might fall to my share .

This thiefe ( thought I ) shall not carry it away so ; hee shall not haue all the thankes , and laugh at me when he has done . I will not bee thus gull'd by him . And therefore I resolued with my selfe , to acquaint him with the whole successe of the businesse , who , I presumed , would not be a little glad of it , out of the greedy and couetous desire that he would haue to take that bone from vs , which we two stroue for .

Herevpon ( being informed by me ) he commanded Soto , that he should presently giue him that which I had giuen him . He stoutly denies , that hee had any thing of me . The guards are will'd to search him ; they doe so ; and when they had done the vtmost of their diligence , they could finde no such thing about him , nor any the least signe or token thereof . Where-vpon I gathered , that he had done as I did , deliuering the same ouer to some other body , to keepe it safe for him .

I told the Commissary , that there was no question to be made of it , but that he had secretly conuay'd it away to some one or other of this our company , for that really and truly he receiued it of me , who gaue the same vnto him with mine owne hands . When he saw , that neither by faire meanes , nor by foule , by perswasions , nor threatnings , nor any other course that hee tooke with him , he could be brought to manifest the truth , and to bring these things to light ; the Commissary commanded they should take him aside , and put him to the Racke , till they should make him to confesse . And for that they had no other instruments there , saue Cords , they applide them to those his lower parts ; and when vpon their twisting , they began to straine some-what hard vpon the flesh , which was too delicate and sensible to indure any torture , being likewise a faint-hearted fellow , and of little or no courage , hee forth-with confessed , whither he had conuayd them . Therevpon , they presently tooke his Pigge from him , ( so that he lost that too by the bargaine ) and taking out the intrals to see what was there , they quickly lighted on the two little bundles , in either of which was a Rosario , or set of Beads of the perfectest , and the daintiest pure Corall , that euer mine eyes saw ; euery Bead at both ends , hauing his Cap of Gold , which was much graced by the neat cutting and inameling that was bestowed vpon them , which ( it should seeme ) were sent as tokens to two seuerall persons .

The Commissary makes no more adoe , but presently claps them vp in his pocket , promising to befriend me for it , and to giue mee , what I my selfe should aske for them . Soto was herewith so madded , and so extremely incensed against me , that they were forced to change our chaines , and set vs farther asunder then before ; for though we were thus diuided , and parted each from other , they did afterwards fall to manacling of him , fastning both his wrists together with bolts of iron , because when he came where any stones were , he would take them vp , and throw them at me .

In this troublesome manner we came at last vnto the Gallies , iust vpon the very nicke , when they were calking , and rigging , and making all ready to put forth to Sea , and to goe in chase . And before they brought vs aboord , they carried vs to a Prison , where wee past ouer that night , with the like in commoditie and trouble , as at other times . Nay rather , it was worse with vs now , then heretofore , for that the Prison was little , and cramm'd as full as euer it could hold . But be it better , or bee it worse , such as it was , wee were forced to take all in good part , and to make as good shift as we could . For we could not doe as we would , nor make choise of 〈◊〉 place to our liking .

The Commissary had talkt in the meane while with the Kings Officers ; who came with those other of the Gallies , and the Kings Alguazil ; and hauing now assigned and appointed vs our Bankes , where wee were to sit and rowe , they gaue the Commissary a discharge for the deliuering so many Slaues into their hands , who told mee , that he would come and see me ; and that he would stand my very good friend ; so he betooke him to his Mule , and from that day forward , I did neuer more set eye on him .

Now , before that they tooke vs out of Prison , to leade vs along to the Gallies , they had ordered how wee should bee diuided , and it fell out , that wee were to goe sixe and sixe in a fyle ; in which diuision , it was my ill lucke ( thankes to my sinnes , that laid this punishment vpon me ) to haue Soto to be my Camerade .

This done , they presently deliuered vs ouer to certaine Moorish Slaues , who with their halfe Pikes came to guard vs along , and tying our hands with tough thongs , which they had brought with them for that purpose , away we goe with them . We come aboord the Gally , where-into being entred , wee were willed to retire our selues to the poope , till that the Captaine and the Masters-Mate should come , and call vs out one by one , placing euery man in this , or that other Banke , as they thought fit ; now , when they were come amongst vs , they went walking vp and downe on the Coursey , or the Gallerie-like space , on both sides whereof , the Slaues Bankes are placed : and whilest they were looking on the bankes , and aduising with themselues where it were fittest to dispose of vs ; the other Gally-slaues began to set out their throats , and to cry out aloud vnto them , desiring that they would disperce vs amongst them ; some complaining that they had an vnprofitable member amongst them ; others , that all in their Banke were weake and feeble persons , vnable to doe any seruice .

But the Captain●… , and the Masters-Mate , not giuing eare to their clamours , but gouerning themselues by their owne discretion , hauing considered what was fittest to be done , placed vs heere and there , as they saw cause : in which partition it fell to my lot , to be ranked in the second Banke , iust before the Cooke-roome , neere vnto the Masters-Mates Cabin , at the foot of the Mast ; hauing placed , Soto in the Patrone , or Masters Banke . It grieu'd me very much , that he was seated so neere vnto me , in regard of the late quarrell that had beene betweene vs ; for wee could neuer afterwards indure one another ; and he , me lesse , then I could him ; for he was a malitious minded man , & had intertained in his heart a deep hatred against me ; though I ( for my part ) neuer did deny him my friendship , nor was euer wanting vnto him , whensoeuer he had occasion to vse me : but he , like the Commissary , would haue all to himselfe , if I should haue let him alone . And all he should haue had , and that with a very good will , if I had but once thought , that hee would haue cry'de quits with mee , and paid mee home in mine owne coyne . When they had brought mee to the Banke , those that were there , bade mee welcome ; in requitall whereof , I could haue wisht , that I had beene able to say vnto them ; Excuse me , that I cannot come .

They installed me in my seat , and put on the Kings Robes vpon me , two What Guzman indured in the Gallies . Shirts , two paire of linnen Breeches , a colour'd Wastecoat , and a red Cap. I was scarce warme in my seat , when a base vnder-Barber comes vnto mee , a better Shauer , then a Cutter , and with his Razor , makes my head and Beard : as bare as my hand , which I tooke to heart , for the great account I made thereof . But re-collecting my spirits , I beganne to comfort my selfe , that this was the fortune of the world , and that others , that had beene in farre higher place , had falne into farre greater miseries .

I remoued my eyes from those that were before mee , and looked towards those that were behinde me : not considering so much with my selfe how many were more happy , but how many were more wretched then I was . O this looking downeward is a comfortable thing to a man in misery . And albeit , it be true , that there is not any life almost so miserable , as that of a Gally-Slaue , yet was it not halfe so bad as that which I indured with my first Wife . And it was some comfort besides vnto mee , that I was not a lone man in this my afflictions , but had many fellowes that suffered the like torment .

A yong fellow that belonged to the Alguazil , made presently towards mee , to clappe fetters on my feet , and manacles on my hands , chaining mee , and other my companions , that sate together on the same Banke , so fast , and so sure , that wee could not stirre from thence . Then did they giue mee my allowance , which was sixe and twenty ounces of Bisket ; it so fell out , that that day was ( as we call it ) dia de Caldero , the Caldron day , for the boiling of flesh , and making of pottage : And because I was but a new-comer , and was vnprouided of a woodden dish , I tooke my part of those mammocks that were shared amongst vs , with one of my fellowes that sate by mee . I would not offer to soke my Bisket in it , but chew'd it downe dry , as all your fresh-men doe at the first , till time had taught mee the vse of my armes .

The paine we were put to for the present was little or nothing ; for the Gallies being then a trimming , and a calking , wee that were the ghing , the base rout , and raskalitie of the Gallies , seru'd as then for no other vse , but to row towards the shore , when wee were so commanded , and to make prouision of boughes , or something else for shade , lest the heare of the Sunne should melt the tallow . All the cloathes that I brought aboord with mee into the Gally , I made show of them , and sold them ; which yeelded mee some money , though not much , adding that , to that other little summe , which I brought with me , when I came out of Prison . Nor did I know in the world , how , or where I might secretly lay it vp , and keepe it safe , either to relieue mee in such necessities as vsually offer themselues , or to imploy it in some one thing or other , that I might haue a penny in my purse at a pinch . And for that I had neither Coffer , Chest , nor so much as a Deske , that had a Locke and Key to it , where I might safely lay it vp , it did some-what trouble me , not being able to deuise with my selfe , what I were best to doe with it . To carry it still about mee , were to runne the hazzard of beeing robb'd , or coozen'd of it by my owne Camerades : And to commit it to another bodies keeping , I had already too late experience of the ill correspondence in that kinde .

All I saw , was ill , it concern'd me to looke well vnto it , and to be-thinke my selfe , how I should dispose of it . At last ( after long consideration ) I resolued with my selfe , that I could not giue it a better or more secret place , then to clappe it in my bosome , and to lay it as neere to my heart as I could possibly bring it . Others put their hearts there , where they put their treasure : but I tooke a cleane contrary course , putting my treasure where my heart was .

Well , I got me a needle and thread , and clapping my Thimble on my finger , I fell to worke , and made mee vp a little Purse , about the bignesse of a Wax-kernell , which being strongly sowed , and quilted with many a sure stitch vpon that part of my shirt , which toucht vpon my heart , I bare it there , neuer suffering it to be out of my sight ; and hauing still an eye vpon it , that it might bee the safer from its friends , and my enemies , who would bee euer and anon leering that way , casting a sheepes eye towards it ; but hee , whose mouth watered most at it , and had a months minde to be doing with it , was a notable famous Thiefe , that was my Camerade , and sate next vnto mee , who could neuer come to filch it from mee , neither at mid-night , nor at at any other time , so surely did I guard it on that side . Yet was hee not wanting to doe his best ; for , when he perceiu'd that I was asleepe , hee would goe groping heere and there , visiting euery part about mee with his hand ; and for that the roomes were but few , and the houshold-stuffe that belong'd vnto them , not much , they were easily and quickly runne ouer . Hee had past ouer in a trice , a little Satchell that I had by my side , my Gabardine , and my Breeches , and was come now at last to my Waste-coat , which I might more properly haue termed my Soule : for that with its warmth , it did viuifie , and quicken the bloud , whereby it sustained it selfe , and was kept aliue . Wee both labour'd hard , hee to robbe , I to keepe . He was not so crafty , but I was as carefull . And if at any time I did strip my selfe naked , I would order the businesse so , that it should be impossible for him to take it from vnder mee , vnlesse he tooke mee away with it . Hee continued a long time in this his care to come by it , watching all opportunities to rob me of it .

Now , in the meane while , forasmuch as I did consider with my selfe , that wheresoeuer a man liues , hee had need of an Angell of guard to attend him vpon all occasions ; I beganne to bethinke my selfe whom I should make choyse of to bee my Protector . And after that I had thorowly thought there-vpon , I could not finde out any fitter for my turne , then the Masters-Mate . For albeit it be true , that the Captaine , as Lord , and chiefe Commander of all the rest , is to bee accounted the onely Protector of vs all ; yet , out of his authoritie and greatnesse of his Place , hee will not trouble himselfe with this raskall rabble .

They are for the most part principall persons , and men of qualitie ; they will not vouchsafe to looke so low ; they reckon not of such poore snakes as we be , nor take any notice who , or what we are . And I was the willinger to make this choyce , for that the Masters-Mate was my neere neighbour , his Cabbin was close by my Banke , by meanes whereof , I might the easier and more conueniently serue him . And so much the rather was I desirous to settle vpon him , because hee carried the Cudgell , and had the possession of the salt Eele , which hee distributed amongst vs , either more or lesse , according as he fauour'd , or dis-fauour'd ; paying some soundly , and letting others goe scot-free .

Thus by little and little , I went scruing my selfe into his seruice , getting more ground still vpon him , and striuing to out-strip the rest : As well in my attendance at his boord , as in hauing him to bed ; I trickt vp his Cabbin , brusht his Cloathes , kept them neat and handsome , lookt to his linnen , and was in euery other respect so diligent about him , that within a few dayes I was the onely man in his eye . Nor did I account it as a small fauour , that hee would deigne mee a good looke : It seeming vnto mee , as oft as hee lookt vpon mee , that hee had bestow'd a Bull ( I meane not the Pizzle ) vpon mee , and a free Indulgence from stripes , and that hee did thereby absolue mee both à culpa , & poena : From my fault , and the punishment thereof . But therein I was deceiued ; for that they beeing naturally seuere and cruell , and that commonly such kinde of sterne and austere men are put into such places , they neuer haue an eye to consider courtesies , not seeking to requite good , but to punish ill .

They are a people , that will not acknowledge any thankefulnesse , because all that wee doe for them , they thinke to bee due vnto them . A nights I did ridde the Dandruffe out of his head , rubb'd his feet , fann'd his face , destroyed the Gnats , and waited on him with that obseruance and punctualitie , that the greatest Prince in the world could not bee better serued . And if they serue their Prince for loue , I did the like to the Masters-Mate for feare ; lest the Hoope of a Hogs-head , or an Eeles tayle should twine it selfe about my shoulders , which kinde of weapons they neuer goe without . And howbeit it bee true , that this manner of seruice is not so perfect , nor so noble as the other ; yet feare makes men to take more heed . And now and then when I saw hee was waking , and had no minde to sleepe , I would entertaine him with a merry Fable , or pleasant Historie , to passe away the time the better . And I was neuer vnprouided of a company of witty iests , and fine conceits , to make his Worship laugh : It being no small comfort to mee , to see him looke cheerefully . I grew in grace with him , and was very happy in this particular ; yet am I so much priuieto mine owne worth , that it was no more then my good seruice did deserue . So that now , hee would not that any other , saue my selfe , should serue him in those things , which gaue him the greatest content . And I had more especiall reason to esteeme of this his fauour towards mee , in regard that hee had a Gally-slaue , before hee entertained me , that attended on his Person . Whom , though hee vsed well , yet hee went dayly pyning and consuming away , that hee was very sorry to see it . For , though hee led a better life then the rest , and that hee lou'd him so well , that he fed him from his owne trencher , and bestow'd the best morsels vpon him ; yet was he like your Gaeta-colts , which the better you feed them , the worse they proue .

One day , when wee were both together with him , waiting at the table , he said vnto mee ; I prethe ( Guzman ) tell met ( for thou art a Scholler , and an vnderstanding fellow ) what should bee the reason , that Fermen being , at his first comming into the Gallies , of a very able body , strong , fat , and lusty , and I hauing sought to continue him still in the same state , by entertaining him into my seruice , and doing other friendly Offices for him , not eating that good morsell , whereof hee hath not a part , should , the more I make of him , fall ( as thou seest ) the more away ? Whereunto I made answere ; Sir , for to giue resolution to this your question , it will be needfull for me to relate vnto you another case , like vnto this , of a new Christian , who had past thorow the hands of the Holy-House , or ( as we commonly call it ) the Inquisition . A short tale of a new Christian that had one of the Inquisition to to his neighbour .

This man was rich , and powerfull , liu'd honourably , and in a plentifull fashion , led a merry life , waxed plump , and fat , had all things neate and handsome about him , and tooke much content in the house wherein he dwelt . Now it so fell out , that one of the Inquisitors came and tooke a house , that was the very next doore to his ; who , for no other reason in the world , saue only that he wasso neere a neighbour vnto him , grewe so meager , and so leane thereupon , that within a very short time , he was brought so lowe , and pined so fast away , that he was nothing but skinne and bone . So that to both these , I shall giue Solution , by another the like accident , which I shall deliuer for truth vnto you , and thus it was :

Muley Almançor ( who was King of Granada ) had a great Priuado , or A Storie of the King of Granada , and his Fauourite Buferiz . principall fauourite of his , who was called el Alcayde Buferiz ; a very wise man , punctuall , trusty , and hauing many other good parts , worthy the great loue that his Lord and Master bare vnto him ; for the which his King lou'd him so dearely , as also for the trust and confidence that he had in him ; ( for there was not any difficulty in the world , which he would not wade thorow , so as it might make for his Maiesties seruice ) And for that those , that deserue these kinde of honours , are euermore enuy'd by those that are vnworthy of them , there were not some wanting , who , hearing the King speake of his loue and affection towards this his Fauourite , said vnto him ; Sir , that your Maiestie may see , whether that bee true or no , for which you so much commend your Alcayde ; would you be pleased to make proofe of him in some busines of importance , and where in there is some difficultie ; and then shall you finde , whether he be that maner of man , that you take him to bee : For by the diligence that he shall vse therein , your Maiestie shall truly knowe , whether his heart be with you or no. The King liked exceeding well of this motion , and said ; I will not only command him in a busines that is difficult , but such a one , as is impossible to be effected . And causing him forth-with to be called in , he said vnto him ; Alcayde , I haue a thing to giue you in charge , which you must accomplish out of hand , vpon paine of my displeasure , and the losse of my fauour ; And this it is ; I shall deliuer ouer vnto you , a good fat Weather , which you shall keepe at home in your owne house , you shall giue the same allowance of meat , as he was wont to haue heretofore , and more , if more hee will eate ; and within a Moneth , you must returne him back vnto me , poore , and leane as a rake .

This poore Moore , whose desire was neuer other , then to serue his King , & punctually to performe whatsoeuer hee should bee pleased to commaund him ; how beit he did beleeue , that he should neuer be able to bring such an impossibilitie as this , to passe ; was not therewith dismayed a whit , but readily , and with a cheerfull countenance receiuing the Weather , he caused it to be craryed home to his house , according as the King had commaunded : And there sitting downe , and deuising with himselfe , how he might bring this busines about , and giue satisfaction to his Masters desire ; hee began to set his wits aworke , and at last lighted vpon a strange , yet a naturall conceit , which , he presumed , would make much for his purpose , and cumply with the Kings commaund .

Hee caused two woodden Cages to bee made out of hand , both strongly barr'd , and of equall bignesse , the which , he gaue order should be placed very neere each to other ; in one of the which he puts me the Weather , and in the other hard by him , a Wolfe : To the Weather , he gaue his full allowance ; but the Wolfe , he kept so short , that he was still exceeding hungry ; And being almost famished for want of meate , he did labour all that he could ( thrusting his legges within the grates ) to reach at the Weather , and to try if hee could come at him , and eate him . The fearefull Weather , being much troubled , and sorry at the heart , to see himselfe so neere his mortall enemy , although he did eate that which they gaue him , he did thriue so ill with it , out of the continuall feare that he was in , that he did not only not waxe fat , but pin'd away , till he was pure skinne and bone . By this course that he had taken with him , he returned at the time apoynted : the Weather back againe to his King , not failing in that he was commauned , nor falling from his accustomed grace and fauour .

Now that I may apply this Story to the purpose wee haue in hand ; It seemeth vnto mee , that Fermin is growne leane and feeble , by beeing so neere about you , and by liuing in that grace and fauour with you , as he doth : And it is only the feare which he hath of you , whom he so much desires to serue , that makes him to thriue no better then he does .

The Masters-Mate was so well pleased with this Tale of mine , because it fell out so pat to the purpose , that he presently gaue order to haue me remoued from my Banke , receiuing me into his seruice , and giuing me the charge of his Wardrobe , and of his Table , for that hee had alwaies found me suitable to his desires . Nor , ( for all this fauour that he shewed vnto mee , which was very great in releasing me from the obligation of a Slaue , and exercising such duties , as were required in the Galley ) would I forbeare ( for mine owne pleasure ) to come sometimes amongst them , and to doe as they did ; but would now and then , of mine owne accord , fall to my labour , that I might not bee to seeke , if out of necessity I should chance to be put vnto it .

There did I learne to knit Stockins , to make false Dice , as your High-men , The exercises of your Gally-Slaues . and your Low-men , setting two Aces one against another , or two Sixes on one Dye , for your Coggers and Cheaters , who , for the vse that they made of them , would pay well for them . I likewise there learn'd to make Buttons , both of Silke , and of haire ; as also dainty delicate Tooth-picks , of diuers sundry inuentions , and colours , and neatly guilded ; which none in the Galley could do besides my selfe . My poyze being put into this ballance ; that is , standing vpon these euen termes , we were forced to goe with our Galley to Cadiz , for Masts , and Main-yards , Sayles , Pitch , Tarre , Tallowe , and the like necessaries ; and this Voyage was the first , wherein I was put to any paines : For , being so much friended by the Masters-Mate , as I was , they did not force me to doe any more worke , then what I would my selfe .

And for that this did not seeme to me , to bee a matter of any great labour , that I might not shewe my selfe an idle spectator , or that I did seeke to auoyd paines-taking , especially , being that wee were not to giue the chase , or forced to betake our selues to flight ; where , and in which cases , we were to rowe for our liues , and to tugge with all the strength and force that we had , at the Oare ; And for that , when we were once in the Port , and had a good Hauen to friend , we did vsually lye quiet , and were neuer whipt , and had our intertainements , and pastimes , presuming that between Port , and Port , especially being so neere , there needed not the sinewes of an Oxe , to hale and pull ; I would needs set my selfe to the Oare , only to try what manner of thing it was : But it was not so slight and easie a thing , as I tooke it to be : for ( because we were forced to goe towing the Masts , and Main-yards ) when wee came to cast Anchor , I was nothing but wearines and sweat , because I would not leaue my Oare , nor giue occasion to others to murmur , by withdrawing my hand from that , which for mine owne pleasure I had voluntarily vndertaken . And this was the only , and sole cause , why so soone , and so soundly , ( after I had had my Master to bed ) I fell asleepe , falling like a stone , flat to the ground ; giuing very good signes and tokens thereof to my Camerades , who heard me now to doe that , which they had neuer heard me doe before ; to wit , to snort like a yong sucking Pigge . That Traytour of mine owne Banke , was the first ( as being neerest vnto me ) that heard me rout ; and calling softly to another of my fellowes that was his Consort , one that was his very good friend , and whom he might best trust , acquainted him with his desire , and the good occasion that was now offered , to robbe me of that little money that I had . They ioyn'd both together , as well in the manner of sharing it , as of taking it from me . Which they had gone cleare Guzman rob'd by the Galley-Slaues . away with , if I had not had the Alcalde to friend . They tooke it as easily from mee , as they could wish ; passing it presently from Banke to Banke , to the further end of the Galley ; perswading themselues , that because it was night , and not perceiued by any , both of them stiffely denying it , they should , without any more adoe , carry away the prey , and deuide the spoyle between them .

Now , when it was day , they all began to wake , and I amongst the rest , got vp , heauie of sleepe , but light of purse : for that weight which I was wont to feele lying vpon my heart , I felt no more ; and it did much trouble me , that it did not trouble me . I lookt about , and found my money gone ; I was strooke as dead as a doore-nayle ; death was in my face , and I knew not what to doe . If I held my peace , I should heare no more newes of it , but must giue it for lost ; and if I should speake thereof , I should roast all my part thereof ( as the Prouerb is ) vpon my finger , and put all in mine eye , that I should get by the bargaine . Now was I put out of the possession of that which I had inioyed so long ; Whereupon I said with my selfe ; If he that hath taken it from me , will giue me no thankes for it , much lesse shall I reape any benefit from him ; better it were notwithstanding , that he should keeepe it , that has it , for it may be , that at some time or other , he will not be wanting to make some acknowledgement thereof ; and he at last may come to be punished , who did mee this wrong : at least , he will eate his meate with sorrow , when hee sees he shall reape no profit by it . But this Counsaile did not please mee .

Now , when the Masters-Mate was ready to rise , I brought him his cloathes and while he was making himselfe ready , I made hima long relation of my mis-fortune , making him ( to my cost ) to knowe , and to touch , as it were with the hande the miserie of those men , who hauing purst vp a few pence with a great deale of labour and paines-taking , earning it very hardly , are , either by mischance , or by a pilfering hand , depriued thereof in an instant : Telling him moreouer , that I had brought those moneys from Seuill , amongst which , I had likewise put those other , which I had made of my cloathes that I sold , when I came aboord the Galley , which I kept as charily as I could for my life , that I might there-with either relieue my necessities , when occasion should serue , or else imploy it on some one thing or other , that might yeeld me profit . And as I was opening my minde thus vnto him , I likewise opened my bosome , and shew'd him the false stuffing , wherein I had put it , the mold , or indented marke whereof , these Theeues had left behinde them , being for all the world , such a kinde of print , as a Hare leaues in her Forme , when she is newly gone out of it .

It seemed to the Masters-Mate , that this that I told him , was an euident truth , and giuing credit vnto me , strengthened the more in his beliefe by this empty Forme , where the Hare was vs'd to sit , as also , out of the loue that hee bare vnto me , he commaunded the two fore-Bankes , and six other that were in the rere , to be had in Coramnobis ; whereupon , the Alguazils seruant , comming amongst them with a good Ropes end , ( which your Sea-faring men The manner of the bea●…ing of your Gally-Slaues . call a salt Eele ) gaue euery one of them fifty sound blowes apiece , which made the wheales to bunch out vpon their backs , leauing the skinne clinging close vnto them : Examining first euery one by himselfe , whether he had seene or heard of this stolne money ? And after they had beene well lasht , they washt them with salt , and tart Vineger , rubbing their wounds there-with , leauing their backes and sides so rent and torne , as if they had not beene men .

When this theft hapned , there was by chance a Gypsie that was not then asleepe , when my purse was stolne , and when his turne came to receiue his payment , hee confest , that hee had seene his Companion , the night before , rise from his owne Banke , and to goe to mine , but why , or wherefore he knew not .

When that Slaue perceiu'd that hee spake of him , and that hee had charg'd him in this maner , he started vp on his feet , and said ; That he was intangled in that chaine , which belonged to the other Banke , and that hee had sprained his foot thereby , it being wrung and wrenched by it , and that hee was faine , ( for to giue himselfe ease ) to clamber ouer thither , to dis-intangle himselfe . But because this reason was too weake to hold water , and carried not that fairenesse with it , as to bee taken for a iust excuse , and much lesse with those , who knew well inough on which foot hee halted , they tooke him presently to taske , and had many more stripes bestowed vpon him then any of the rest . And the Masters-Mate was so angry with the Alguazils seruant , because hee did not lay them on so soundly as ●…hee would haue him , that hee gaue order , that hee should presently haue as many bestow'd vpon him ; besides a great many more which hee himselfe with his owne hand laid vpon him with the Hoope of a Hogs-head . And in this his cholericke humour , ( for he was now mightily moued ) hee forth-with commanded , that they should take the delinquent in hand againe , and baste him as long as they could stand ouer him ; who ( poore man ) had more then inough before . But when hee saw that hee must goe to this geare againe , he then began to thinke with himselfe , that the Masters-Mate would neuer giue him ouer , till hee had confest the truth , and therefore held it to bee his best course , to deale plainely and truely with him , who had the money , by what meanes they came by it , and the plot that they had laid to get it from mee , excusing himselfe the best that hee could , as that he had no purpose of himselfe to doe it , and that he had neuer entred into the businesse , had he not otherwise been drawne into it .

Well , hee was well lasht afterwards for his offence , and my money was Guzman recouers his lost money . returned backe vnto mee , which I receiued with a very good-will from my Masters hand , aduising mee withall , that I should imploy it , making profit thereof , for hee should bee well pleased with any thing that were for my good .

My good fortune ( like froth ) beganne to increase more and more , in regard that I gaue my Master such good content . And the Gallies beeing to goe forth , which were to ioyne with those of Naples , vpon a certaine imployment at Sea , I got mee a-shore , hauing a Souldiour of guard to bee my keeper , and to looke to my safe returne , where I imployed all that little money that I had , in matters of victuallage , which presently from my setting forth from thence would double the cost , and it succeeded well with me . Out of that gaines , ( with my Masters leaue ) I made mee a sute after the fashion of an old Gally-slaue , or one that had beene of ancient standing amongst them , Hose and Wastecoat of black Buckram , listed and welted handsomely in the seames , which ( it being then the Summer season ) was cooler and fresher for me , and fitter for my turne .

Now ( thinking vpon my former mis-fortunes ) I beganne to haue a glimpse of that light , which they inioy , who follow Vertue , and protesting with a firme resolution , and settled constancie , rather to dye , then doe a base action ; I did onely study , how I might serue my Master , how I might please his humour , and giue him all content , how I might keepe his cloathes , his Cabbin , and his table cleane and neat .

And as I was thinking and considering on these things , I said one night Guzman discourses , and tels vs , that it is onely Vertue and Goodnesse , that brings a man to Heauen . with my selfe ; Guzman , thou seest heere the top of that Mountaine of miseries , where-vnto thy filthy sensualitie hath brought thee : now art thou come to the highest part of it , and must either make a speedy leape downe to the bottomlesse pit of hell , or which thou mayst more easily doe , by lifting vp thy armes , take hold on Heauen . Thou seest now the care that thou hast to serue thy Master , for feare of a few stripes , which being giuen to day , are not felt to morrow . Thou doest watch late , rise vp early , thou art diligent , carefull , and sollicitous in seeking out new Inuentions , where-with to delight him , and to purchase his fauour , which when thou hast obtained , is but of a man , and a Masters-Mate . And this is the most thou canst make of him .

Now thou well knowest , and canst not be ignorant of it , for thou hast beene a profest Student , and hast studied that point ; how much lesse God requires at thy hands , and how much more he hath to conferre vpon thee , and how farre a greater friend hee is , then any man can be vnto thee .

Rouze vp thy selfe therefore , and awake from this heauy sleepe , which oppresseth thy soule ; Returne home vnto thy selfe ; and consider , that though it be true , that thy sinnes haue brought thee hither , yet so apply this thy punishment vnto thee , and lay it so neere to thy heart , that thou mayst make good vse of it , and that it may turne to thy good . Thou hast sought after a stocke to imploy it for thy profit ; seeke now to obtaine eternall happinesse , and lay out all that thou hast , that thou maist buy it . For it is a Iewell of inestimable worth , it cannot be valued . These thy troubles , these thy miseries which thou indurest , this thy care which thou takest to serue this thy Master , put it all to Gods account , and bee as diligent in seruing him . Charge him also with that , which thou art to lose hereafter , and hee will beare the burthen of that charge ; hee will lessen thine , and adde it to his owne account . With this thou maist buy grace , which if here-tofore it bore no price with thee , ( for euen the best deseruings of all the Saints that euer were , cannot raise such a stocke , whereby to be able to buy it , till their merits meet with those of our Sauiour Christ ) now make much of it ; and the rather seeing that Christ , that he may communicate this his grace vnto vs , is willingly become our brother .

What brother did euer forsake a good and a louing brother ? Serue him but with a sigh , with a teare , or with a true heart-sorrow , grieuing for thy sinnes ; and being angry and offended with thy selfe , that thou hast offended so good a brother : And so by giuing him that which thou hast , hee will ioyne thy stocke with his owne , and making it of an infinit price , not by thine , but his merits , thou shalt enioy life euerlasting .

In this discourse with my selfe , and in other , which rose out of this I spent a great part of the night , showring downe teares in aboundance , and Guzmans conuersion . waxing now heauy with the griefe for my sinnes , I fell asleepe ; and when I awakt , I found my selfe another manner of man then I was before . I had cast off my old heart , and put on a new one in its place . I gaue thankes vnto God for this my regeneration , and that hee had renued his spirit aright in me , humbly beseeching him , that he would vphold me with his holy hand , and strengthen mee with his grace .

Presently vpon this , I treated of the frequent Confession of my sinnes , and of the reformation of my life , and of the cleansing of my conscience ; in which good deliberation , I continued many dayes ; but I was flesh and bloud . I did still stumble , almost at euery step , and now and then tooke a fall . But for any proceeding in my accustomed euill actions , I was much amended , and went from that time forward reforming my former course of life . Howbeit , for that I had exercised my selfe so much in my fore-passed ill deportments , I was still pointed at with the finger for a wicked man , which name I could neuer claw off , but did sticke close vnto me . For this is an euill , that followes euill men ; that euen those good actions which they doe , leaue a iealousie and suspition behinde them , and occasion , as it were , scandall to such as see them . For , though we doe them neuer so well , & with an vpright heart , yet are wee held to bee but Hypocrites . We haue a common Prouerbe amongst vs ; Que se sacan por las Uisperas , los dias Santos : Prouerb . S●… sacan por las Visperas , los dias santos . That by the Vespers , we come to know the Feasts of the Saints . So they , by my precedent actions , would iudge of the future .

But to giue the world leaue to censure things as they list , let him that would faine know whether hee stand in the state of grace or no , and liue in Gods loue and fauour , looke , and consider with himselfe , how God worketh with him , and he shall easily come to know it . Vse thy best endeuours ; doe that , which ( as a good Christian ) thou art bound to doe : so shall thy workes bee acceptable in his sight , and thou shalt know ( like Abel ) that God is well pleased with this thy sacrifice , and that hee hath set his eyes vpon thee .

Marke and obserue , whether hee vses thee no worse , then hee vses himselfe ; for this is a sure and infallible signe , that thy Lord loues thee , when of the same bread that hee eateth ; of the same cloathes which hee weareth ; of the same table , where hee takes his meales ; of the same seat , whereon he sitteth ; of the same Wine , whereof he drinketh ; of the same bed , whereon he lyeth ; he makes no difference betweene thee and him , but is as it were all one . What did God inioy ? What did God loue ? What did God suffer ? Troubles .

Now then , when God shall share these with thee , hee shewes that hee Troubles , the signes of Gods loue towards vs . loues thee . Thou art his Minion , he feasts thee , and makes much of thee ; Be thou so wise as to receiue these things thankefully , and to make profit of them . Nor doe thou thinke , that God refuses to giue thee thine owne hearts desire , thy pleasures , thy contentments , riches , and large possessions , or what else may delight thee , for that he is close fisted , niggardly , or couetous ; for if thou art willing to see the worth of these worldly comforts , turne but thine eye aside , and looke vpon those that possesse them in greatest aboundance . But who are these ? Euen Moores , Infidels , and Heretiques . But God runnes a contrary course with his friends , with those that are his elected , and best beloued children ; the cherishments , and blandishments , that he bestowes vpon them , are pouerty , afflictions , and persecutions . O had I but knowne so much heretofore , as I doe now , and that God would haue been pleased to haue inlightened my vnderstanding , that I might haue truely seene , and lookt into my former errours , I might haue benefited my selfe in another kinde of manner , then I did at that time .

I am the willinger to deliuer this vnto you , for that when I made this Discourse with my selfe , I did doe it truly , and with all my heart . And albeit I am not worthy to merit thereby any reward , ( being so great a sinner as I am ) yet notwithstanding , this little crumme , this poore drop , this small sparke , had its reward at that very instant , that slender repentance of mine , that my resolution ( though weake ) to doe good , and that good beginning which I had put my selfe into , was not without its paiment .

As soone as I had re-gained my moneys , new persecutions , and new troubles beganne to grow vpon mee . Would to God that I had beene so considerate , as I ought to haue beene . He stript mee of that contentment , wherein I now liu'd ; and hee beganne to touch mee to the quicke , and to beat me with many stripes . That small shade of Iuy , ( which like Ionas Gourd , did keepe mee from the scorching of the Sunne ) was lost , and quite taken from mee ; it was dry'de vp , and withered , there was a worme bred in the root of it , which had wasted and consumed it ; so that I was forced to lye open to the heates , suffering new calamities , and new troubles , and such as I neuer thought on , without any cause giuen by mee , or any the least signe of offence , hauing no way deserued such hard measure . But stay thy Pen , and ingeniously confesse , that such miseries and afflictions as these , are that hidden treasure in the field , so highly commended vnto vs . And since thou hast patiently heard me hitherto , for thine owne pleasure , heare mee now another while for mine ; and hearken a little to the remainder of my misfortunes , where-vnto I shall giue an end , in the next ensuing Chapter .

CHAPTER IX .

Guzman de Alfarache prosecutes that which hapned vnto him in the Gallies : And by what meanes he came to be freed from thence .

THere was a famous Painter , who was so excellent in his Art , that he had not his fellow in all the world . Vpon A short Story of a Painter , with its application . the fame and report of whose admirable pieces of worke , there came a Gentleman to his house , and going into the roome , where hee drew his pictures , hee agreed with him , that he should paint for him in a Table , a very faire and beautifull Horse , with rich furniture , and gracefully set forth , who being loose , should seeme to runne away as fast as his legges could carry him . The Painter performed this piece of worke with all possible perfection , and shew'd therein the vtmost of his skill . And hauing fully finisht it , he placed it there where the colours might soonest grow dry ?

Now , when the Gentleman came to see how this his worke went forward , and to know how farre hee had proceeded therein , the Painter made haste to shew it him , telling him hee had already ended it . And for that , when hee set forth this Table a drying , the Painter did not greatly care ( as a thing that was nothing materiall ) to set it after this , or that other manner , more one then another : So that the horse stood ( as hee had then placed the Table ) with his feet vpward , and his Saddle downeward .

The Gentleman , when hee lookt vpon it , it seeming vnto him not to bee the same , which hee had be-spoken , said vnto him ; Sir , the Horse that I wisht you to make me , was to be drawne running away ; and this rather seemes to lye tumbling on the ground . The discreet Painter , mildly made answere ; It seemeth , Sir , that you haue no great insight in painting ; the Picture is the same , that you pretend , if your Worship will bee but pleased to turne the Table . Wherevpon , that part that was downe-ward , was turned vpward ; Which done , the Gentleman viewing it againe , rested very well contented there-with , as well for the goodnesse of the workmanship , as that thereby he was taught to know his owne errour .

If wee consider the handy-workes of God , they will oftentimes seeme vnto vs like this Horse , that lyes tumbling and wallowing on the ground ; but if we shall but turne this Table , wrought by the pensill of that supreme Artizan , that painted to the life both Heauen and earth , beautifying the one with Sunne , Moone , and Starres ; the other , with all variety of colours , in flowers , fruites , and the like ; we shall finde , that this is the piece that wee would haue , and that the worke is done to it's full perfection .

Troubles ( as I told you a little before ) seeme harsh and sharp vnto vs : we haue not ( no more then had this ignorant Gentleman ) the true discerning of them aright ; there are fewe that vnderstand them as they should ; but when he that sends them vnto vs , shews that mercy vnto vs , which is laid vp in them , then we shall see them in their true shape and colours , and shall take great pleasure and delight in them .

Amongst all the Slaues that were in the Galley , there was none of them like vnto me , either in their good vsage , or in the knowledge of giuing such good content as I did , to my Master . But the pinne in Fortunes wheele slipt out , & vp came I in such a strange kind of manner , as the like was neuer seene .

It hapned at that time , that there came a Gentleman into our Galley , who bare our Captaines name , and was also of kinne vnto him , to learne experience , and to see some seruice . He was rich , well clad , better behau'd , and ware about his neck a massie chaine of gold , Soldier-like , being iust such another for all the world , as I was vs'd to haue heretofore . He dieted in the Poope ; he had a good garnish of Plate ; and seruants , that waited vpon him , well and handsomly suited : But it so fell out , that the very next day after his imbarking , there were eighteene linkes of his chaine missing , which were no lesse worth , then fifty Crownes . Sure , some of his owne seruants must needes haue them : for there were none , that came into the Poope-roome , but such as were knowne persons , and free from all suspicion : Yet notwithstanding , for the better cleering of this doubt , all the Captaines seruants were put to the lash , yet for all that , was there no newes to be heard of them , they could neuer heare of them more , nor get any the least inckling thereof in the world , nor is it knowne till this day who stole them , or what became of them .

And for the better excusing hereafter of the like misfortune , the Captaine came to his kinseman , and told him , that his best and surest course was , that for the time that he stay'd there , he should commit the charge of his apparell , and Iewels , to some trusty Galley-Slaue , who might take care of them and keepe them neate and handsome ; assuring him , that what-soeuer hee should deliuer to any one of their custodies , they durst as well be hang'd , as not giue him a true account of it , and that there should not bee so much as a haire missing , of any thing that he should trust them withall .

This Gentleman liked very well of his counsaile ; and making afterwards inquirie , who in all the Galley might be the fittest man for him , and the most sufficient , I was the only man they made choyce of , as being recommended vnto them , for the good satisfaction that I would giue him in my vnderstanding , my diligencie in attending his person , and for my cleanlines about my selfe , as also any thing that was my masters . When the Gentleman had heard of these my good qualities , and how I was likewise able to intertaine him with witty iests , & merry conceits , hee thought the time long , till hee might see me in the Poope . So in all haste , they called the Masters-Mate vnto them , and being intreated to part with me , he could not deny them their request , although it grieu'd him much , for the good seruice that hee receiued from mee ; They clapt a long chaine to my legge , which I trailed after mee ; and I was no sooner come vnto him , but he was very glad to see me , and spake very kindely vnto me : and I thinke the rather , for that my feature , my face , and my actions , were answerable to that which he had heard of me . It did somwhat grieue him , to see mee ( like a Monky ) ty'd thus to a chaine , and to drawe it after mee . He intreated the Captaine , that hee would fauour me so farre , that I might walke vp and downe with one only fetter ; which was graunted : By which meanes , I was inabled to doe him the quicker and nimbler seruice , as well when he sate without at his meales , as when he was within his Cabbin , as also , in going to & fro in the Gally , when occasion was offred . I had an Inuentorie deliuered vnto me , of all his apparell and Iewels ; whereof , I still gaue him a very good accompt ; But that which he and I , had least affiance in , and were most iealous of , was , of his owne seruants : For now that I had the charge of his recamera , his Wardrobe , or whatsoeuer else was appertaining vnto him , they might easily excuse themselues of such things , as they could steale cleanly from me . They cabbin'd with the Chaplaine , neere to the maine Mast : and the Gentleman , he had his cabbin within the Poope ; and I , in alittle Dispense , or Pantrie , where I kept some regalos , and dainties , besides other necessary prouision .

I liked very well of my seruice , though I tooke a great deale of paines , but it was a pleasure vnto me , and gaue me much content , that I had now the power , by those things that past thorow my hands , to performe many kindnesses toward such Slaues as were my friends and acquaintance : and albeit I was willing to haue done the like towards Soto , my old Camerade , yet I could not get within him , nor come to fasten any kindnes vpon him ; I wish't his good as mine owne , but he did all me the spight that he could , discrediting and disgracing me , telling some things truly of me , and inuenting other-some , like vnto those , at what time we were taken , and committed to prison , defaming me , as much as did lye in him , broaching whatsoeuer hee knew of me , not leauing any one thing vn-ript vp , for the manifesting of his malice , and my shame : so that , albeit I , for mine owne part , were priuy to my selfe , how much I was now reformed ; yet those that heard him thus exclaime against me , would make interpretation of them , as they stood affected , and comment vpon them , as they themselues listed . And though God , at that instant , should haue giuen mee the power to haue wrought Miracles , they would not haue stik't to haue said , that I had done them in Belzebub's name .

Soto , was the knife , that sought to cut my throat ; the point , or edge thereof , was still towards me : yet neuer did any man heare me speake so much as one foule word of him , or euer open my mouth against him , or make show of any the least choller , at this his abusing me : I made no reckoning of it , but let it passe as lightly as I could all my whole care being now taken vp , in the - diligent atending of my new Master , and in doing him all faithfull seruice , that I might procure his loue and good liking towards me ; hoping it might one day so fall out , that either by him , or by some other , in recompence of my good seruice , I might chance to purchase my liberty .

When he came out of his Cabbin , I was stil at hand to receiue him ; when he set his feet to come downe the ladder , I lent him my hand , at his entering , and returning out of the Cock-Boate ; I made him Tooth-picks for his Table , putting them vpon a plate , when he sate downe to his meate ; which , being many , & maruailous curious , hee would often send for tokens to his friends . His Trencher-plates , and those his other vessels for the cooling of his wine , his Cups , and his Glasses , were so cleanly kept , so neate , and so in euery point as they should be , that it was a pleasure to the eye to behold them . His bottles of Wine , and his iarrs of water , fresh and sweet ; the wooll of the Mattresses whereon he lay , kept vnknotty , and soft ; his whole bedding so well look't to , that there was not a Flea to be found in it , nor any the like troublesom vermin : for as my leasure would giue me leaue , it was my daily exercise , to goe a hunting after them , stopping those holes and chinkes , where there was any the least suspition of their breeding , that my Master might not only be free from Fleas , and Chinches , but the bad sent which they haue with them .

So great was my diligence , and so pleasing the whole manner of my proceeding with him , that my Master had now left off conuersing with his other seruants , and would at large discourse with mee of graue and weighty matters ; but dealt therein with mee as your Distillers vse to doe ; he did Limbecke me , and squeeze what hee could from mee ; and when hee had exhausted from mee that iuice and substance , which was for his turne , and as much as hee desired at that time to draw from me , he would pause awhile vpon the matter , or to speake more plainely , was halfe iealous of mee , that I was not so complete , and perfect as I should bee , nor had not that true touch and rellish , which properly appertaineth to your purer distillations . And all for the smacke of one Herbe , which was that euill report , which Soto had giuen of mee . But his virulent tongue could not make mee wrong Vertue : I went as fast on in doing well , as he did in speaking ill : as well , that my actions might giue him the lye , as also for that I now minded no other thing , then to runne on still in that good resolution , which I had proposed to my selfe .

When I waited on him at Table , I would out now and then with a merry Tale , or some odde conceited iest or other . And a-nights , or at other such times as hee was disposed to take a nap , I would chat one thing or other to him , that I might keepe him still cheerefull and merry . And the rather , for that of late hee was growne some-what melancholly , vpon a Letter that hee had receiued but a few dayes before from a graue personage , to whom hee was much obliged , who all his life-time could neuer be drawne himselfe to marry , and was now wonderfull instant with this Gentleman my Master that hee would get him a Wife . Perceiuing therefore how sadde hee was , I made bold to aske him the reason , why hee was so pensiue . He told it me ; and did likewise aske my aduice , what hee were best to doe in this case ? I told him ; Methinkes ( Sir ) that the fittest answere , which is to bee giuen to such a one , who hath beene so auerse from marriage himselfe , and would now inforce others there-vnto , at least seeke to perswade them vnto it , is , That you are well content to doe so , if hee will giue you one of his daughters to Wife . My Master was well pleased with the counsell I gaue him , resoluing with himselfe to take that course which I had prescribed vnto him . And continuing talke till it was dinner time , he will'd mee to tell him , being I had beene twice married , how I liked that kinde of life .

I told him , Sir , a good and peaceable marriage , where loue , and condition of the parties stand vpon equall termes , it is a glory ; it is an enioying Touching Marriage . both of earth and Heauen ; it is a state for those , who make choise thereof , out of a desire to be saued thereby , of so great perfection , and of such exceeding both content , and comfort , that for to treat of such a subiect , it will require the relation of such a tongue , as hath tasted the true happinesse thereof . But for my selfe , who made Matrimony a matter of money , and more for pleasure , then propagation , as I did , I know not what to say vnto it ; I haue deseruedly paid the price of that sinne , by this my present punishment , which I now indure .

There are some women ( I must confesse ) who by their wisedome , and discreet Worthy Wiues , who are they ? carriage , haue reduced to very good order and conformitie , as peruerse and wicked men , as any are in the world . And there are other some againe , that will make the best tempered , and the holyest men aliue , to lose all patience , Wicked wiues , and which are they ? though he he able to suffer neuer so much . Look but vpon Iob's wife , and see into what a desperate humour she would faine haue put her Husband ; how did she persecute him , and how much did it import him , to haue recourse vnto God , and onely to defend himselfe more from her , then from all other his persecutions , and afflictions ?

And therefore three friends being together in conuersation ; the one said ; Opinions of Marriage . Happy is that Man that hath the good hap to match with a good Wife . But more happy ( said the other ) who buries her quickly , if shee proue vnto ward . And the third said ; Most happy is hee , that hath neither t 'one nor t'other . How much an importunate Wife and of an ill condition , doth torment and vexe a man , let that Prouenzall tell it you , who being quite wearied and tyred A Tale teaching a man how to be vid of a bad Wife . out with a shrewd Wife , and being vnable any longer to indure her harsh behauiour , and not knowing in the world , how to correct these her malignant humours , that he might without scandall rid himselfe of her , hee was resolued to goe and make merry with his Wife and all his Family , at a house that hee had in the Countrey , that was not farre off , it lying in his way , to passe by the skirt of a Mountaine , adioyning close vpon Rodanus , a great and swift Riuer ; which in that very part of it , for that it was narrow , and past along betweene two Mountaines , was very deepe , and ranne with a furious Currant . Hee tooke order that the Mule which his Wife was to ride on , had not for three dayes before , one drop of water giuen her ; so that , when she came to the place afore-said , and that she saw the water , there was no holding of her backe , but hastning downe the hanging of the Hill , from one ridge to another , shee got to the Riuer ; from whence , it being impossible to turne her about , and to get vp againe against the steepinesse of the Cliffe , nor being able with all the force she had , to reyne her in , they both rushed into the Riuer , where the woman was drowned , & the Mule with much adoe escaped ; but came out so weake , and so weary , that she was scarce able to stand vpon her legges .

For those which neuer knew what marriage meant , and yet desire to bee informed what manner of thing it is , I may for a patterne set before their eyes , that which passed with those Thrushes the Summer following that they were hatcht , and ready to fly abroad and shift for themselues . There A Tale of certain Thrushes . was a great Shole of them gathered together , as if all the Thrushes in the world had ioyn'd in one muster , and were such a cloud of them , when they were vpon their wings , that they seemed to darken the ayre , and by their interposition betwixt the Sunne and the Earth , to make an Eclipse .

And when all this iolly company were assembled , and met together , they rais'd their Campe , and marched away together , to seeke out some better place to liue in , ( for that yeere , their owne Countrey failed them of that plenty , which it was wont to afford them ; ) so at last they entred into a very goodly Countrey , that was full of Gardens and Orchards , and fresh Fields , where there were many pleasant Fruits , and other delicate feeding for them ; where they were very willing to set vp their rest , it seeming vnto them , to bee a place not onely of much recreation and delight , but of sufficient sustenance and maintenance for them . But when the Inhabitants of that Countrey saw how they flocked together , they spred their nets , made ginnes , and pit-fals for them , and by little and little went taking and destroying of them .

The poore Thrushes , seeing themselues thus persecuted , and that they could not safely feed there , nor rest in quiet , they sought out another place that might make better for their purpose , which they found as pleasant , and as plentifull as the former ; but they tasted heere of the same sauce , as they did there ; which made them likewise to fly for feare from that danger which hung ouer their heads .

Thus did they trauell vp and downe from place to place , till that they being in a manner almost all destroy'd , those few that were left aliue , agreed to returne home to their owne Countrey . When their fellow-Thrushes that stayd at home , saw them returne so faire , and fat , they said vnto them ; O how happy are you , and how wretched are we ? Wee stayd heere behinde , and you see how weake , and how poore wee be ; but you are come home in that good case , your feathers so smooth , and so sleeke , that it is a pleasure to looke vpon them ; and your bodies so plumpe , and so well fed , that yee can scarce fly , yee be so fat ; whereas we through pure hunger , are scarce able to stand vpon our legges , and when we are on our wings , are ready through faintnesse to fall to the ground .

Where-vnto these welcome-home Trauellers returned this answere : The eyes of your consideration reach no farther , then to this our fatnesse ; but if you would be pleased to weigh with your selues , how many of vs went from hence , and how few of vs are returned home aliue , you would rather rest contented with your poore , but secure fare ; then with this our fatnesse , and full feeding , so full of dangers .

They who looke onely on the pleasures of Marriage , and goe no farther , where they may see scarce ten of ten thousand , to come off cleere , and escape the danger of it , will thinke better of a single life , then of Marriage ; and that it is farre better and safer to be alone , then ill accompanied .

Whilest we were in this Discourse , dinner was seruing in , and the cloth being laid , I waited as I was wont to doe ; hauing my eyes still fixed on my Masters hands , that hee might not wagge a finger , but I might bee in readinesse to apprehend and execute his thoughts . But whilest I was thus watchfull about my Master , Soto was not sleeping in the meane while to worke me a mischiefe .

And when he saw all his former malice could not worke mee out of fauour , nor doe mee any harme , with sheere money hee went about to purchase out his reuenge vpon mee . He grew into a League of friendship with my Masters Page , such another Bird as himselfe , for that bribes had corrupted Soto his malice towards Guzman . His plot to disgrace him . him , and priuate interest drawne him to be thus dishonest towards me . He promised him a dainty fine payre of Stockins of his owne knitting , and told him , that he would bestow them vpon him , if ( as he waited at the Table , he could handsomely steale a piece of Plate from thence , and hide it in some secret place in my Pantry , that I might not know of it . For , in so doing , he should effect two good things . First , he should gaine a good paire of Stockins by the bargaine . And secondly , himselfe , and his other fellow seruants , should by this meanes be receiued againe into fauour , and I cast out .

The Page did not like amisse of this motion ; and taking occasion that day to goe downe , he tooke vp a Siluer Plate , which ( by lifting vp a little boord ) he hid in one of the sides of the Gallie .

Now when the cloth was taken away , going to gather vp my Plate●… as my manner was ) that I might make them cleane , finding one of them wanting , I made diligent search for it ; and when I had searcht euery corner , and could not finde it , I presently gaue notice , that I mist such a Plate ; to the end that some diligence might be vsed , for the sooner recouerie of it , with those his seruants that appertained to the Poope .

The Captaine and my Master did beleeue what was truth at the first ; but Hatred , what effects it produceth . because my enemy Soto bare witnesse against mee , it was voiced out amongst them , that my selfe , abusing the fauour that I had with my Master , had stolne it , and conuayd it away , that I might lay the fault vpon others , and so goe away with it my selfe . This roguish Page , did put a helping hand here-vnto , and did all that he could to disgrace me ; So that now the doores beganne to be set open to suspition , and had made some little entrance ; and stepping farther in by degrees , my Master was often earnest with mee , to confesse the truth , before the businesse should grow fouler . But because I knew mine owne innocencie , and that I was as cleere thereof , as the child that is new borne , I could giue him no other satisfaction saue good words .

Then this Traitor the Page stood vp , and said ; Methinkes , Sir , it were not amisse that you would cause his Dispence , or Pantry to be searcht . For it is not possible , but that hee must hide it some where or other there-abouts . For , being that I had not gone out of the Poope , it was very likely they might finde it in my lodging . This course tooke best , and was of all very well liked , and approued : And so getting them downe , and rummaging all that little roome ; first this place , and then that , they lighted vpon it at last where the Page had put it ; and taking it forth , they came vp with great ioy , and proclaim'd , that now they had found it , and that I had hid it there ; for that it was not possible , that any body else should doe it .

Now , because this carried with it a show of truth , and that they had caught me in the Negatiue , this confirmed them in their suspition , and this crime was laid to my charge .

The Captaine commanded the Alguazils seruant , to glue me fifty stripes ; from the which my Master did free me , intreating my pardon , for that it was the first fault that I had committed ; aduising me withall , that if hereafter I should be taken with the like , I should be soundly punisht , and pay both for the old , and the new . After this , I held not vp my head any more , my heart was neuer truely merry , nor did inioy my selfe , as before ; not for that which was past ; but fearing that which was to come ; Thinking with my selfe , that he , that had done me this wrong , would ( hauing scap't this so well ) watch his time to doe me a greater mischiefe . And being iealous of some farther foule play , I earnestly besought both the Captaine , and my Master , that they would quit me of this charge , and that I might haue their good will to deliuer ouer those things that were in my custodie to some other , and I should take it from them as a fauour , that they would returne mee backe againe , laden with my irons , to my Banke . They thought , that the ground of all this , was the desire that I had to goe backe againe to serue my old Master , the Masters-Mate : And howbeit I did importune them very hard , and was very instant with them ; they , for the same reason , were more earnest and vrgent vpon mee ; and that I should ( though it grieu'd me ) serue and attend there all the dayes of my life . Miserable man that I am ( said I ) I know not in the world what to doe , nor how to defend my selfe from Traytors ; who , it seemeth , haue set themselues against me , onely of purpose to vndoo me .

I did all that I could possibly doe for my life , no man liuing could be more carefull , watching ( like Argo's ) with a hundred eyes , whatsoeuer was committed Argo's eyes are not sufficient to keepe a man from the malice of his enemies . to my charge , not neglecting those things that were scarce worth the looking after , being but trifles , and not to bee reckoned of : yet all this my care would not serue my turne ; it hath done mee , you see , no good ; I was now in my rising , but Heauen hath thought it fit that I must first fall .

One euening , as my Master was comming forth , I went out ( as I was wont to doe ) to receiue him as he was to ascend the stayres , I gaue him my hand ; he comes vp : I tooke off his Cloake , his Sword , and his Hat , and gaue him his Sea-Gowne , and Cap , which was of greene Damaske ; for these things I had still in a readinesse .

When I had done , I carried downe those other things , putting them in their right place . That very night , not knowing , how , who , or by what meanes ( vnlesse it were the Diuels doing , for I could not conceiue otherwise of it ) that the Hat being falne downe from the place where it hung , I found it without a Band , which was set with gold Buttons . Whip , Sir Iohn , it was gone in a trice ; so that in the morning , when I saw how it lay , and the Hat-band gone , I stood like a man amaz'd .

Well , I search't as diligently for it , as if my life had layne vpon it ; but to no purpose in the world . The Hat-band would not appeare , not was there any signe , or marke thereof , how it should be gone .

When I told my Master of it ; Ah ( said he ) now I know thee to be a thiefe ; I wot well what thou art , and why thou doest it . But set your heart at rest , it shall not serue your turne , for the Hat-band must not be so lost ; I shall make you fetch it out , and yet faile of your purpose besides . I know your fetch well inough . Doest not thou thinke , that euer since the Plate was missing , I haue lookt into your water , and found out the disease thou art sicke of , and that thou goest seeking new occasions , that thou mayst be quit of my seruice ? But thou shalt serue me still in spite of thy teeth , if it be but to vexe thee the more , and thou shalt haue a thousand bastonado's walke daily about thy shoulders : Nor shalt thou euer serue any other Master in the Galley , but my selfe ; And in case I should go hence , I will so farre befriend you , that thou shalt be rank't like a Rogue , according as thy Villanies deserue , and thy lewd and naughty dealings , since my good vsage towards thee , will not make thee leaue of , to be that which thou art , and euer wilt be Guzman de Alfarache ; that's inough , I need say no more vnto thee .

I know not what to say vnto thee , nor to indeare the griefe that I conceiued here-vpon . Finding my selfe cleere and innocent , and yet charged with a iust ( as they would haue it ) and lawfull crime , I reply'de not so much as one word , nor had I the power to speake ; And if I should haue sought to iustifie my selfe , had it beene Gospel , that I should haue deliuered vnto them , comming out of my mouth , no more credit would haue beene giuen vnto it , then to Mahomet . I therefore was silent , and held my peace . For , when words will not profit a man , it were better that his tongue should be dumbe , and his heart tell its griefes vnto God . Inwardly to my selfe , I gaue his Maiestie thankes for this my affliction , beseeching him , that he would free mee from this mans hands ; for I knew not , wherein I had offended him . For I was so truely become another man , and so quite altred from that I was before , that I would rather suffer my selfe to be torne in a thousand pieces , then to commit any the least crime in the world .

When they had vsed many diligences , and saw that by no meanes they could bring this Hat-band to light ; the Captaine commanded the Alguazils man , that hee should beat it out of mee , and neuer giue mee ouer , till I had confest the Theft .

I was presently taken vp , they did what they could , and I indured it as well as I could . They would haue mee to acknowledge that , which I neuer knew , whilest I with my soule powr'd forth such prayers , as I knew ; inuocating heauen , that that torment and bloud , which those cruell stripes did draw from mee , might bee ioyned with those innocent droppes , and vndeserued tortures , which my good God both suffered , and shed for me , and that they might bee auailable for mee to saluation ; seeing that there was now no way but one with me : For dye I must vnder these their tyrannous hands , if they did not leaue off the sooner . They saw all of them in what a pittifull case I was , and there was nothing else wanting betwixt mee and my death , but the breathing forth of my Spirit . And albeit it seemed to my Master , that my crueltie , in suffering my selfe thus to be whipt , was greater then his , in commanding it to be done ; yet at last taking compassion vpon me , and pittying the great torment that I was put to , caused me to be taken away .

Then did they chase my body with Salt , and Wine Vineger , which was of greater torment vnto me , then the other . The Captaine would haue had them to haue giuen me as much more vpon my belly , saying ; Little doe you know , Sir , the condition of these Theeues , who are of like nature to your Foxes ; they will counterfet themselues to be almost dead , and will lye , as if there were no life in them ; but if you let them alone , and suffer them to take breath , they will runne from you , like so many yong Colts : And other some are so hardy , that for a piece of sixe pence , they will let you slea the skin from off their backes . But let this Dogge assure himselfe , hee shall not carry it away so ; for I will neuer giue him ouer , till I haue either the Hat-band , or his life . He commanded me to be carried away from thence to my Dispensilla , or little Pantry , where they did lye at mee ( I know not how often ) with perswasions and admonitions , euer and anon notifying vnto mee , that I should either deliuer vp the Hat-band , or arme my selfe with patience ; for it was resolued , that I must be beaten to death , rather then I should inioy what I had stolne . But , as no man can restore that which hee neuer had ; no more could I cumply with that which they commanded me .

Then I knew what it was to be a Gally-slaue ; and how that the loue , which some made show to beare vnto mee , and the good lookes that they gaue mee , proceeded onely from the pleasure that they tooke in my merry iests , and witty conceits , and not for mine owne sake . And the greatest griefe that I did feele in these my miseries , was not so much for the paine which I did indure , nor for the false witnesse that was giuen against mee , as that all of them did verily beleeue , that I did iustly deserue this punishment , and therefore tooke no pitie of me .

Some few dayes ( after this my rubbing and being washt with Salt and Vineger ) past ouer my head , when lo , they came a-fresh vpon me , commanding me to make restitution of the Hat-band ; and because I would not or ( to speake more truely ) could not giue it them , they pull'd mee out of the Pantry , being very weake and ill , fastening Cords to the wrests of mine arme , and haling me vp with a pully , I hung ( I know not how long ) in the ayre , which was a terrible torment vnto mee , where I thought , I should haue breath'd my last . For my heart was so afflicted , that I had scarce any feeling that there was any such thing in my body , and my breath began to faile me . At last , they let me downe , not to giue me case , but to lay me downe vpon my backe athwart the Cannon , that lyes betweene the Fore-castle , and hinder Decke ; where when my belly lay fit for their purpose , they laid thereon such cruell blowes , as if it had beene for some heinous crime , charging the Officer to be-labour me euen to the death .

But the Captaine , beginning now to feare , that I was ready to giue vp the Ghost , and that hee should bee accountable to the King for mee , if I should through this his cruell vsage perish in my punishment , hee held it the better option of the two , rather to lose the Hat-band , then me . Where-vpon hee commanded they should take me away , and carry me to my wonted lodging , there to be cured .

When I began to recouer , and had got a little strength , they yet thought themselues not sufficiently reuenged of me ; for they had still this stedfast beliefe o●…me , that I was such a notable Villainem and such a stubborn Rogue , that I would rather suffer all that rigour of this their whipping and scourging of me , then lose the interest of this my supposed theft : Insomuch , that they commanded the Masters Mate , that he should neuer pardon me , when I did offend , but that he should be very carefull to punish still in me , those sinnes that were veniall , as if they had beene mortall :

And he , who could not otherwise choose but fulfill his Captaines command ( for he durst not for his life doe otherwise ) did chastise me with vnaccustomed crueltie one while for that I did not get mee to sleepe at my due houres ; another-while , for that I did not wake in time ; if to supply my other wants , I did sell my allowance , sparing the meat out of my belly , to relieue my necessities , I was sure to be lasht for it ; vsing me so extremely ill , that I was weary of my life , and did desire with all my heart , that I were out of this wretched world . And , that they might haue the better colour to doe as they did , and that they might picke occasion to pay mee soundly , and yet saue themselues harmelesse ; they committed to my charge the trouble of the a a The Italian will haue this to signifie tu●…a la robo del Rey. The French ●…nders it , Con●…ille . Cor●…lla ; with protestation , that if any thing therein should be wanting , I should be sure to pay well for it . I was likewise vpon all occasions , like the rest of the Gally-Slaues , put to tugge at the Oare ; my Banke was the hindermost , and therefore the more painfull , as being subiect to the inclemency of the weather ; in Summer , to heates ; and in Winter to colds ; being still ty'de to haue a care to keepe vp the Beake of our Gally in the windes mouth , and to goe snugge and tyte . To my custody , were committed all the iron implements that were aboord her ; as likewise the Cables , to cast or weigh Anchor , as need should require . When we did sayle with the winde , I was faine to looke to the fore-sayle , as also to the sheate that was to the Lar-boord ; sayle , or not sayle , I had something still to doe , either before , or behinde . I did spinne all the Hempe , whereof your smaller cordage , and lesser Ropes were made , which were spent and imployed on the Gallies . It was put to my account to tye vp the Yards , to ruffle the Sayles , to dry them , and then deliuer them to the Ship-boyes , to hoyse the Fore-sayle , and see euery thing fit about it . I did mend those ends of the sayles that were torne and rent with the winde , I did patch and lengthen out those that were grown too short ; I did strengthen the old tacklings with odde ends , that I had in store for that purpose ; but the Cables I supplyde still with new stuffe : I did helpe the Gunners to plant their Ordnance , remoue their Carriages , and to winde and turne their Artillerie , as they would haue it . The care was laid vpon me , to stop the touch-holes , and to see them well couer'd , that no wet should come at them ; to looke to the scouring sticks , and the Spoones to powre in the powder , to the Rammers , the Spunges , and the Lin-stocks that belonged to the Artillerie . And when the Master-Mates man was out of the way , or otherwise occupied , it was inioyned me to sweepe and make cleane the Gally , and to bee the common Swabber , causing the Ship-boyes to bring Mats and Rushes , to make Maps where-withall to rub it , keeping it alwayes neat and cleane from all kinde of filthinesse . And of old ends of Ragges , or of Flax and Tow , to make wads and wisps for those that go to the Long-house ( you know what I meane ) and this was the vtmost of all miseries , and that went most against my stomake , as being of all others the meanest and the basest Office ; for being to serue them with these , for so beastly ( that I may not giue it a worse word , for feare of turning thy stomake ) a piece of businesse , I must first be forced to kisse it , before I giue it into their hands , so that by an Attourney , I must kisse , you know what .

He , that should haue so many things committed to his charge as I had , and had not been accustomed vnto them , it must haue been almost impossible for him not to haue failed in the performance of them ; but through the great care that I alwayes tooke , I did study to doe all things well , and did seldome or neuer misse in doing of my dutie , and with vse , they grew euery day lesse difficult then other . Euen from hence also would Fortune haue throwne mee downe if she could ; but because her force cannot extend it selfe against the goods of the minde ; and that aduersitie makes men wise and prudent ; I still bare vp stoutly , and continued firme and constant , withstanding all the power that she could make against me . And as hee that is rich , and liues happily , is euermore afraid of falling ; so on the contrarie , was I in good hope of rising , because it was impossible for me to fall any lower . And as my minde gaue me , so it fell out .

Soto , my Camerade , came not to the Gallies , either to giue Almes , or to preach Faith in Christ to the Infidels It was his sins that had brought him thither ; for he had been the greatest , and most notorious thiefe , that euer was heard of in his time , either in all Italy , or in Spaine . Hee had sometimes beene a Souldier , and knew euery part of the Countrey , as one that had trauell'd it to and fro many a time . Hee perceiuing that our Gallies did sayle along the Mediterranean , and that we went touching now and then vpon the coast of Barbary , seeking reprizals , it entred into his imagination to treat with some Moores , and other Gally-slaues , that were of his faction , to make purchase of this our Gally , and to goe sheere away with it . For which purpose , he and they were already prouided of some weapons , which they had hid in by-corners , and vnder their Banks , to make vse of them , when time should serue . But because he could not bring this his designe to passe , without hauing me to bee of his Party , in regard of the place that I had in my Banke , where I was behinde at his backe ; and for that the ordering of the Tacklings and Cables were committed wholly to my charge , he thought fit to make me acquainted with this his intention , casting and considering with himselfe , that this businesse would be better welcome to no man then my selfe , as well for that I was condemned to serue there as a Slaue all the dayes of my life ; as also , that I might free my selfe from that Hell , where-into they had thrust me , and did so seuerely punish me . Soto would haue broken the Ice himselfe , and did much desire to conferre with mee about it , but hee could not finde the meanes . Where-vpon , he sent a Messenger vnto mee , ( one that hee might trust ) desiring my reconciliation , and fauour , and that I would ioyne with him for the better effecting of our freedome from this cruell bondage and slauery wherein we now liued . I returned him answere , that this was not a businesse so easily to be vndertaken as hee supposed ; but ought to bee well weigh'd and thought vpon , before we did resolue thereon ; for we must needs runne a very great hazzard in the vndergoing thereof ; for that there was no medium betwixt these two ; either to come off cleere , or to lose our liues . To the Moore , who had brought me this message , my Counsell did not seeme amisse ; Telling me , that he would goe with my answere to Soto , and finde a time to come againe vnto me , and talke farther of it .

In the Interim , while these messages past to and fro , I consulted with my selfe ; and for that I had put on a full resolution , not to doe any thing that was infamous , or ill , no not for any profit or benefit that should accrue thereby vnto me , I knew that it was now no time for mee to aduise farther with them ; as well , for that I saw how they were resolued ; as also for feare , if I should fall off from them , or otherwise misse of their purpose , they might chance to disclose me , and suborne some false witnesses against me , the better to excuse and saue themselues : Giuing out , that I , to free my selfe from the misery , wherein I liu'd , had incited them there-vnto . Well , I gaue them good words , and made my selfe to be of their party , they beeing resolued to put this their plot in execution vpon Saint Iohn Raeptists day , betimes in the Morning .

Now , when the Eue was come , and that one of the Souldiers was going to vntrusse a point , when he came to me for some Ockame to wipe his posteriors , I rose vp , and whispering him in the care , secretly said vnto him , Sir , tell your Captain , that it imports both his life , and his honour , to heare two words from me , which tend to his Maiesties seruice : and therefore let him presently giue order that I may bee brought to him into the Poope . He did so , and the Captaine forthwith commanded me to come before him , where , in his presence , I reuealed vnto him this their conspiracy : whereat he blest himselfe , and would scarce giue credit vnto it ; it seeming vnto him , that I had inuented this of mine own head , that I might be eased of those troublesome labours , and great miseries which I indured , and that by this meanes . I might procure some mercede or fauour from him . But when I told him , where he should find their Weapons , and who , and how they were brought thither , hee rendred many thankes vnto God , that hee had deliuered him from so great a danger ; promising , that he would see me well rewarded for my labour .

Hee commanded one that was Captaine of a Squadron , that hee should make diligent search about those Bankes , which I had pointed forth vnto him , and looking there for their weapons , at last they lighted vpon them . Presently there-vpon , was a Processe fulminated forth against all the Offendours : And because the next day following was a great Festiuall day , and very solemnely obserued by vs , their punishment was deferr'd till the next day following-God , ( and my good fortune ) who was well pleased with this my seruice , and did guide these businesses of mine , by his owne diuine hand , would needs haue it fall out so luckily for mee , that opening a Chest to hang out the Streamers that belonged to the Maine-Mast , the Misne , and other fitting places for them , as well in acknowledgement of their thankefulnesse vnto God , as the honour and solemnitie of that day , they found therein a nest of Rats , and amongst other trinkets my Masters Hat-band .

Soto conceiuing how the world was like to goe with him , was very desirous to haue his ghostly Father come to him , that ( like a good Christian ) he might make confession of his sinnes , and crauing pardon and forgiuenesse at my hands , for the false witnesses , that he had suborned against me about the Hat-band , he did together declare , how , and wherefore hee had done it , and howbeit he had made show to be reconciled vnto me , and to enter into a new League of friendship with me , yet his purpose and resolution was , when they had made themselues Masters of the Gally , to haue stab'd me , his hatred being such towards mee , that nothing could satisfie it , but my death . From whose reuengefull hand , my good God , that day , was so gracious vnto me , as to free me from this his implacable malice .

Soto , and one of his Companions , who were the Ring-leaders of this rebellion , were condemned to be drawne in pieces with foure Gallies ; and fiue other to bee hang'd : Which sentence was executed . And as many as were found to haue a finger in this businesse , were confined to the Gallies for terme of life , being first publikely whipt , passing from Gally to Gally , till they had rounded the whole Fleete . As for the Moores , most of them had their noses and their eares cut off , that by this marke , they might be knowne , where euer they came , to be Rogues vpon record .

This exemplary Iustice hauing past vpon these Offenders ; when all was ended , and things settled as before , the Captaine sends for mee , and highly extolling the goodnesse of my nature , my innocencie , and my loyaltie , crauing pardon of me for my former ill vsage , hee commanded my irons to bee strooke off , and gaue me leaue to goe at libertie vp and downe the Gally , till his Maiesties Royall Scedula should be sent for my absolute discharge . For so the Captaine had supplicated for me ; and being consulted on by the Councell of Warre , the Petition was signed ; which was no sooner sent downe , but I was set at liberty .

And heere ( gentle Reader ) doe I put a full point to these my mis-fortunes . I haue giuen thee a large account of my lewd life ; it is truely summ'd vp vnto thee . What it was hereafter , thou shalt see in my third and last Part , if God shall giue me life : and that I doe not first exchange this transitorie one , for one that is eternall , which is the hope and life of the faithfull .

FINIS .

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