The spiritval exercises of the most vertvovs and religious D. Gertrvde More of the holy order of S. Bennet and English congregation of Our Ladies of Comfort in Cambray she called them Amor ordinem nescit and Ideots deuotions, her only spiritual father and director the ven. Fa. Baker stiled them Confessiones amantis, A lovers confessions.

THE SPIRITVAL EXERCISES . OF THE MOST VERTVOVS and Religious D. GERTRVDE MORE of the holy Order of S. Bennet and English Congregation of our Ladies of Comfort in Cambray , she called them .

Amor ordinem nescit .

And Ideots Deuotions .

Her only Spiritual Father and Directour the Ven. Fa. Baker stiled them .

Confessiones Amantis .

A Louers Confessions .

Amans Deum anima , sub Deo despicit vniuersa .

A soul that loueth God , despiseth al things that be inferiour vnto God . Imit . l. 2. c. 5.

Printed at Paris , by LEWIS DE LA FOSSE , in the Carme street , at the signe of the Looking Glasse . M. DC . L VIII .

With Approbation .

REnowned , More whose bloody Fate England neer yet could expiate , Such was thy constant Faith , so much Sir Thom - More , Thy Hope , thy Charity was such ; As made thee twise a Martyr proue ; Of Faith in Death , in Life of Loue ! View heer thy Grandchilds broken Har● Wounded with a Seraphick Dart. Who while she liu'd mortals among Thus to her Spouse Diuine she sung . Mirrour of Beauty in whose Face The essence liues of euery Grace ! True lustre dwels in thy sole spheare Those glimmerings that sometimes appear● In this dark vayl , this gloomy night Are shadows tipt with glow worm light● Shew me thy radiant parts aboue , Wbere Angels vnconsumed moue Where amourous fire maintaines their li●● As man by breathing Air , surui●es . But if per●hance the mortal eye , That views thy dazling looks mnst dye With blind faith heer i le kis them & desi● To feele the heat , before I see the fire .

D. GERTRVDE MORE MAGNES AMORIS AMOR. R. Loch●m sculp●it

TO THE R. MOTHER The R. Mother Bridgit More of Saint Peter and Saint Paul most worthy Prioresse of the English Benedictin Nunns of our Lady of Hope in Paris . REVEREND MOTHER ,

This deuout Book comes to you of right being your natural sisters excellent Goods , and there is no other heire left to it but your des●ruing self besids I know few or none do any way ●retend to it , but you and your Religious ●●ock who exactly trace by true practice ●ô Practice , diuine practice the only ●eans ) the same holy paths this booke ●reats of . Take and acccept of it therfore R. MOTHER : I guesse I need not much inuite you , for I dare say it wil be most deare to you , and most highly esteemed by you , and yours . If it chance to fal into the hands of any such as may reiect , or cry it down : ( as some few did the Ideots Deuotions of the same Spirit lately set forth ) it wil ( as that did ) but receiue the greater luster thereby , and be more highly prised , by how much it may be misprised by such sensual persons as relish not the Spirit of God , or whose vain and flashing wits as it were spurn at the Diuine , and true heauenly Wisedom . That it hath some hands set in th● margin , and diuers characters in many places to point out certain matter and make them more remarakable , is no● but that in a maner euery line and syllable is most remarkable and worthy t● be obserued . And that some places o● Scripture are quoted in the margin , an● not al , is becaus those be the more clea● plain and vnmingled texts , though th● whole Book hath nothing in it almost bu● Scripture .

And if there be somewhat in the latter end the very same with what is said in the preface , it wil not much annoy since good aduise cannot be too often rtpeated .

I will say nothing of the admirable graces and guifts of the Authour ( let the Book speak them ) becaus I should seeme thereby to praise , and extol you ( her natural Sister , and imbued with the same natural and supernatural guifts ) then which nothing would be more vngrateful and distastful vnto you . Howsoeuer R. MOTHER giue me leaue to inuite and incite you and your Holy Company to go on cheerefully and couradgiously in these sacred and secret Paths of Diuine Loue . With your Beauty and Fairnes intend , proceed prosperiously and reign . Let the wisemen , or rather wits of the world laugh at you . They senseless think your life Madnes , and your waies dishonourable . Be not I say dismayed . For your Truth Mildnes , Iustice ; and your Right hand ( which is is your Spiritual Praier ) wil marueillously conduct you . So desirous to be partaker of yeur holy Prayers , and committing you to the Diuine Protection , I rest euer

R. MOTHER , Your most humble seruant and faithful friend in our Lord . F. G.

THIS DEVOVT SOVLS . ADVERTISEMENT to the Reader . With an Apology for herself , and her spiritual Guide , and Director the V. F. Augustin Baker .

Wherein is excellently described a true interne , contemplatiue Spiritual life , and the maner how to liue happily in it , with right , and true Obedience to God an man .

IT may seeme very strange ( and that very iustly ) that I should write what heere I haue written ; But when I haue heer declared my reason for it , I may perhaps pas with th● censure only of being a little presumptuous . Yet God ( who is my witnes in al , and my ●esire aboue al ) knoweth vpon what grounds I haue done it ; And that it is but for mine own priuate comfort and helpe , and to be seene by no other , but against my wil , my superiors only excepted , from whom ( as they shal require ) I wil not conceale the very secrets of my hart much lesse this which I haue written to lye by me , wherein there may be what they may mislike and correct , to which I shal most willingly submit my-self . Yea and though it seeme to me to be a great help to me to haue that which I haue writ in more light to read when I am either in obscurity of temptation , or other bodily indisposition to which I may be often incident . Yet I wil suppresse it at their command and good pleasure , and put the want thereof willingly to the hazard : ☞ out of confidence in the assistance of God , who is a louer , and rewarder of Obedience . Which vertue ( howsoeuer it may be otherwise thought ) I honour from my hart , and beleeue verily that not●●ng that I do which doth not pertake of that is of any regard at al with God .

● . F. Aug. Baker This I haue thus affirmed becaus he who hath been my Maister , and Father in a spiritual life : and hath brought me into a course , which much satisfieth my soul , and conscience between me and God : ( It tending to nothing but to loue God by seeking him aboue al Graces and Guifts : And by withdrawing all inordinate affection from al created things to become f●ee to loue and praise God in as pure and perfect a manet , as this life wil admit . And also to true submission , and subiection of myself for God to whomsoeuer he puts ouer me in this life , with as great a contempt of my-self as my frailty can reach vnto . )

Is notwithstanding taxed now by the same words in a manner which were alleaged against our blessed Sauiour . Luk. 20.23 . We haue found this man subuerting the people , and forbidding to giue tribute to Caesar. Which though none can iustly say of him ; Yet it hath pleased God to honour him so much as to haue him euen in a publick instrument ( which I haue heard read ) couertly pointed at , taxed and accused of this maner of proceeding .

They taking for their ground , the impe●fections of some through meere frailty committed in this kind . As also becaus some who are of other wayes , and vnderstand not this , affirme it may be inferred out of his books that subiects ( in what they pretend to haue a diuine cal to ) may resist contradict and disobey Superiors . Which that it may be inferred I cannot deny : ●ince a meaner wit then he that affi●meth this may draw strange consequences out of any booke in the howse , if he wil looke vpon them with no other intention , but to carpe . But if they wil ta●e one place with another and consider what we beleeue , and practise also , according to our imp●rfection and fra●lty , they wil see and find in practise the quite contrary . And what was allowed by Fa. Baker concerning shifting to get time and meanes for ou● prayer , was but in case that Super●ors did account it but an vnprofitable exercise . ☞ Which was the only thing I haue o●ten heard him affirme in which he would euer allow a soul to deale in any shifting maner with their Superiors vnder what pretence soeuer .

And this in it-self was neuer held to be a sinne , but an imperfection , which he also th●ught it to be . But this r●ason , for his as it were winking at their imperfection , was to make souls that were apt for praier to make the h●gher esteeme ●hereof , and perceiue the necessity of prosecuting it daily and diligently too , if they euer desired to arriue to any perfect degree in the loue of God . Which esteeme if it had not b● such meanes been brought into the howse : It would haue been hard for ●im to haue made a soul beleeue and acknowledg the necessity , and nobility of it . For it may be practised by some a long t●me before they find any extraordinary benefit by it , and til they find the effect of it in their owne souls they may be apt to neglect , and make no esteeme of it in these days when al most euery one of esteeme inuaigh against it as the most dangerous or vnprofitable exercise in the world .

For some hold one of these opinions , and somo hold the other , to wit . Some hold it only vn●rofitable . Others say it is very profitable if one could auoid the perils of it , which yet in women they hold a thing almost impossible . Which opinion of the two I most feared , because those that hold it pretend by their obiection to haue some experience in a spiritual life : And therefor their words are the apter to make in a soul the greater impression : but as for the former , it plainly sheweth a meere ignorance in the affirmers .

To by carryed away therefor with this opinion and errour of the dangerousnes of a spiritual life . Is that which by these writings I intended , and desired to auoid by the helpe , and Grace of Almighty God . And therefor when I was cleare and not obscured with feare ( which I am very subiect to ) I set down these things to be a helpe , and comfort to me am●dst the oppositions to that which I haue found and experienced so proper and good for me . Which yet whether it be or no my Superiors wil be better able to iudg , seeing not only what I beleeue in al , and my opinion in these things they so much feare our errour in ; but also my practise in a particular manner .

Now as for the shifting about our Prayer , which is the cheif ground of the forsaid publick instrument before mentioned , that wholy tendeth ( supposing our beleif , and practise to be according ) to the disgrace of those who are in that cours of prayer , and to affright those who come after from following their aduise in any thing . They being there painted out in plaine tearmes to be enemies to the gouuernment of Superiors , as hauing had their instructions by a strange , and indirect way , and meanes . I say for al that hath been faid in this kind of following our prayer , ( come on it what wil through opposition of Superiors ) I dare affirme that opinion of Fa. Bakers hath to vs been recalled by him long before the publishing of the instrument . For it was only for an entrance , uot for a continuance since a soul wel setled in prayer would not need it-though at first for foure or fiue years a soul by being hindred from two serious recollections in a day by her Superiors , would haue perhaps been in great danger of inconueniency to her progres , and also neuer haue been able to haue obeyed ●s she should . Which is a certain effect of a truely prosecuted course of prayer : ● supposing it be one who is fit for it ; ●or otherwise it may be very conuenient ●or her to be put into some other cours more proper for her , and if she resist Supuriors in it , she wil be in danger of great inconuenience , if not errours by her misvnderstanding , and mis-applying that which was not for her turn , and this we haue in this very howse seen and known ) which if by vntimely hindring ( a soul apt for it ) a Superior procure● he wil also incurre an inconueniency though not so great as hers . Which is that she who would ( by prosecuting discreatly a course of Mental pra●er ) haue become subiect if it were necessary euen to a very d●gg ; ☜ becometh for want of that strength , and helpe which therein shee got , to be almost impossible to be ruled by the wisest man in the world .

For liuing in Religion ( as I can speake by experience ) if one be not in a right course between God and our soul : ☜ Ones nature growes much worse ; then euer it would haue been , if they had liued in the word . For Pride , and self loue which are ●ooted in our soul by sin findeth meanes to strengthen themselues exceedingly in one in Religion , if she be not in a course that may tea●h her , and procure her true Humility . For by ●he corrections , and contradictions which cannot be auoided by any liuing in a Religious community , I found my hart ●rown ( as I ma● say ) as hard as a stone , and nothing could haue been able to haue mollified it ; but by being ●ut into a course of prayer ; by which a soul tendeth towards God , and learneth of him the true lesson of humbling her-self . Which effect I finding by following Father Bakers plaine , simple● easy and sweet instructions , I was loath to change them for them I could not vnderstand . A●d for this reason by al the meanes● could imagin● I haue endeauoured to strengthen my-sel● by writing , gathering , and thus ( as i● some part of my papers i● wil appeare ) addressing my speach to our Lord . This way i● so plaine , and easy that a● long as the sou● hold●th Humilit● , it is impossible for her t● erre to her great incōueniency , at least in h● main point which ●s the loue of God . For i● less imports for smaler sins , her im●erfectiōs and errors or bangors , ● speaking of suc● as are accounted such by some precise an● exact persons ) as to ouershoot herself i● that in which another would haue c●m● off with honour , or some such point , n● way greatly to the purpose , as to any hinderance to her course . Yea by these things ( I say ) she rather gaineth then looseth since many time● they are a great occasion of Humility to her soul , which much aduanceth her , and is aboue al cheifly necessary for her . For loue to God , and true Humility increase the one the other and are inseparable companions .

In fine as to the point of following Prayer , when the Superior as that time would ☜ otherwise imploy her which I was speaking of before . I say that after the soul hath been some goo● space pract●sed in that exercise The Superiors cannot hinder her in it by imposing that which to them seemeth fit : And the s●ul w●l haue no desire to resist them neither can shee do it without a check from God Almig●ty . For no impl●ym●nts which Religious women haue in Religion can h●nder them ( after they haue had a good entrance ) that the Superiors can impose vpon the● , for if they pray not a● one time thy can easily pray at another , ☜ or best of al pray with the work it-self , and make the work their prayer .

This therefor being so that Fa Baker did this at fi●st , but as a shift in the beginning , there is no iust caus to find such fault with it , he doing it for these two rea●●ns . First , becaus some cheife Superiors had so poor an opinion of Prayer , that they thought they did God good seruice when they hindered them , who seeme to make esteem of it . The other reason , becaus tho●e he gaue his instructions to , and seemed to him most fit for them , were likly to come into place of Authority ; and thereby were not only themselues to suffer much by the continual opposi●ions they were like to find ; but also were to beare a great part of the others Burdens which were more feareful , and had been a lesser time practised in the course : who yet were likely ( if they were encouraged ) to prosper very wel in a spiritual , and internal life . These two were I say in part his reasons , which made him go so far in this point . And yet we that had these instructiōs deliuered by him , had them with such circumstances that we could not possibly take liberty in any thing that was contrary to our Superiours minds by his Books , or words .

And verily I may with a safe conscience affirme , that if I would neuer so fain , I could not find any thing in his bookes , nor in any of this i●structions , on which I could ground my-self ( without a check in my conscience , for doing the instructions wrongs ) to neglect , omit , shift of , or sheightly to performe any thing of my Superiors commanding , or ordaining . Nor could I euer inferre any thing out of them , but that they tende only , and wholy to humble the soul ; and vrge her to seek , desire , and rest in God alone . And this I dare affirme vnder al the Oaths in the world , if Iustice by lawful authority should exact the same of me . ☜ For not any book which he hat writ hath euer tended to any thing els , then that we should liue with al submission and subiection to God , and our Superiors . And if he had taught ●he contrary , an extraordinary effect of it would haue appeared in vs before now , we hauing been dealt with ( being our-●elues in authority ) as we haue been ; And ●ndeed in such maner that no humain in●tructions could haue inabled vs quietly to ●aue supported the same . The grace of God only , and tending to him by the way ●f loue could do it ; which so humbleth the soul that no difficulty , or disgrace can ha●pen which she expecteth not , and ●herefor is abled willingly to embrace the ●●me .

Verily I can affirme this by mine own experience that a crosse word , or a slight reprehension befo●e I was in this course was more insupportable to me , and did more disquiet my mind , then al the diffi●ulties and disgraces , which haue faln vpon me since , haue done . For now me thinks though I be neglected by the whole world : By flying to our Lord he easeth me of al my burthen . And as I haue desired to haue no friend , or comfort but him so it pleaseth him , neither in doubts , feares , payns , disgraces , nor any other miseries ( whereunto this life of ours is so subiect ) to reject me . Only he exacts of me that in al the con●radictions he sends me I humble my-self , and be confident of his help ; which , if I do so , I shal be much more sure , then i● in mine own hands● had a most absolute power to help my-self .

And this humble confidence maketh ones way so cleare that the soul hath few , or no questions in many years , though they haue such very neere that are neuer so wel able to resolue them● This want o● questions is almost al the ground of difficulty between these souls and the Confessor , who thinks himself neglected t● haue souls haue no more bu●ines with hi● then in meere conf●ssion . ☞ But I know no● how the souls can ●elpe it , though there●by they should offend the whole world It seemeth to some a great presumption● that the soul seemeth ●o think her-self f●● to guide her-self , and al●o by it they in●ferre that she sleighteth others though he● Superiors as not fit to gouern her , so ignorant do they think shee doth esteem them . But God and her own conscience knoweth that none of these things are the cause of her being so reserued , as indeed she is , vnles she be asked by them : which if she be they wil see that she doth not in any kind sleight , or neglect them ; yet in speaking she vseth discretion where and to whom ( for one Superior may be fit to be treated with in one point , and another in another ) which none can iudge or tearme a breach of Obedience , and yet this is the furthest that euer Fa. Baker taught .

And who would not think it a meere folly ; if I out of pretence of Obedience , and greater Perfection should treat with one in matter of conscience ( in which I were doubtful ) who had such di●●iculty with me in his na●ure that he were as little able to iudg in my case as I were in mine own . For my part our Congregation giuing leaue for it , and wanting those who are able to iudg aright in my case ; as wel as in others . I should do not only my-self an iniury thus foolis●ly to go to work ; but also him , whom I should thus treat with vpon these tearmes . Which foolish proceedding is not a proper effect of true Obedience , but rather a phansy , and meere folly .

O how far is it then from Fa. Bakers meaning to teach , or allow of any thing which may sauour of disobedience ! It is true that that which those tearm Obedience , who draw it to nothing , but a meere politick course ( that leaueth by the practise of it in a soul a poor effect in comparison of that which by the vow of Obedience , God and the Church intendeth ) serueth where it is practised to keep better order then where there is no Obedience at al ( which God knows in these dayes is too ordinary : ) for opposing against Superiors is a course which cannot stand without great inconueniences For if God require that seculars should obey the Prince , and the Laws of the Realm , so far as it may be done without offence to his own Laws : and if it be required of them that they pay taxes which are by the King vniustly exacted : What shal Religious persons alleadg for their defence , if after the vow of Obedience they resist , and withstand their laweful Superiors in what they may iustly exact ( as we ought to iudg al to be that is not apparent sin and offence to God : ) and better it is to obey in neuer so imperfect a maner , then to cont●nd , and withstand Superiors vnder what pretence soeuer . For though it be true that some great saints haue afflicted their subiects , and mis-vnderstood their proceedings : yet we shal always read that the good subiect neuer sought for other remedy then Patience expecting ( for their clearing in the matter ) God Almighties good wil , and pleasure who permitteh this often to hapen without the fault of the subiect much lesse of the Superior who may do that in iustice which we subiects are not able to comprehend the cause off . ☜ Neither need we trouble our-selues with thinking of that , but regard God in all and walke solicitously with him : and then wil al turn to our good , and God wil infailibly teach vs true Obedience which is a vertue that maketh our life in some sort to resemble the life of the Saints in Heauen . For they in al regard God , and are totally subiect to him . They greiue not to see others in higher degree then they , but see it is iust it should be in al things as it is they praise God in al the sins they see committed in the world & are resigned , though they hate sin , And wonder to see such a Goodnes as God is so forgotten by men , and so litle sought after by aspiring through loue towards him . This they see , and yet they remain in Peace ; and : so shal we ( thongh in a far inferior maner if we perporme Obedience as we ought , and obey God as readily as the shaddow followeth the body ; ☜ by which course we shal become truly happy . And this is our end of coming to Religion , and if we do comply with our obligation in this kind we shal liue quietly and dy confidently ; for the Humility that is in this practise wil carry vs through al things . This way of true Obedience , and subiection to God in al things , is a way which though we walk as it were vpon thorns by reason of the contradictionss , temptations , pains , and afflictions with which those are tried that must be his true friends : yet the regard that the soul in al hath of him , and the loue which by al increaseth in her , maketh it seem to her that she walketh vpon Roses in comparison of the difficulties she suffered when she sought her own wil , by following it , and seeking her own ease , and honour .

This is that Obedience which Fa. Baker so much commends , and wishes souls to make right vse of in there Obedienco to Superiors which is so immediate a disposition to it , and so great a help to strenthen , and perfect it : and which if we neglect in vain do we pretend to practife that towards God . For their ordinances , and orders are a most certain argument of his wil : And nothing wil he bid a soul do contrary to them .

And if it should seeme otherwise to the soul , yet by his own words she would know that she were to stand to their iudgement til he altered their minds , which he always doth , if it be according to his wil , and necessary for his honour that ) the Superior condescend . This I am confident he doth teach , and hold ; and neuer other doctrin did I euer hear him affirme , and what might be construed in a contrary sense was but to condescend to the imperfection of beginners : who if they had been held to such precise Obedience , as some would exact of them , they would haue been in great danger neuer to haue obeyed rightly at al. For by exacting vertue and the practise thereof aboue the Grace and ability of a simple beginner ; they make Obedience and other vertues seeme to be by practise an intollerable burthen , and they by this means also faint in their way euen in their first beginning . Whereas if they had been to do things with discretion they vould haue been able to go faster on euery day then other . And this one point is of sueh moment that for want of the true practise thereof , it commeth many times that the burthens of Religion seem so heauy to good and wel meaning ●ouls .

And in this point do most men differ ●rom Fa. Baker in their direction of souls more them in any other point . And if this course had not by him been held with me in an extraordinary maner ; and that he had not daily for a long time encouraged me not to be daunted with my sins , and imperfections , ( assuring me that it would al tur● to my good , if by prayer I would endeauour to tend to God , and vse the bes● means I could ( yet with al possible patience with my-self for my defects ) to re●forme my-self in al inordinate affection● to created things and this more by quiet●nes then extraordinary force . ) I know no● what would haue become of me . By thi● means ( I say ) diuers imperfections t● which I was subiect ( and which I defit●ed , yet could not at first reforme ) fel of b● little , and little : wh●n God Almighty , di● ( as I may say ) see his time . Which wa● a quite coutrary course to that which wa● extolled by al that euer I met with befor● Who can giue for th● most part no othe● aduise then to ouercome al things by forc● and violence .

But God did sh●w to me plainly in read●ing Fa. Baker Books that my way was t● ouercome my-self as I could , not as 〈◊〉 would ; but expect Gods good pleasure 〈◊〉 it . And then when he pleased if I did 〈◊〉 best , I should by his Grace get the better 〈◊〉 that which with al my industry I was n●● able to ouercome . Which made me 〈◊〉 clearly my own frailty , and how little 〈◊〉 are able to do of our-selues ; yea indeed euen nothing that is good . For when I haue been able to overcome my-self in a thing many a time , yet when I haue thought my-self thereby secure that I was able to do it again , I haue failed more then euer before , which maketh me neuer dare to presume of my own strengh in any thing how little soeuer it seeme : for if I do I am sure to fail .

Another thing besides this point of Obedience ( by a certain persons means ) is much feared in vs by our Fathers : And that is that we sleight , neglect and contemne al books , and instructions but Fa. Bakers ; ( Which is as God knows ) quite otherwise . For though ( as may be gathered by what I haue heere collected and noted ) I do arme my-self by al the means I can imagin against those Obiections which are ☜ made by those of contrary ways that I may hold on my way which seemes to be so proper , and fit for my desired estate which I haue taken vpon me by my profession ; I haue no reason to alter for ways I am not able to vnderstand ; my conscience being ●atisfied with this I am in : and my Supe●iors neuer yet condemning the same . Yet ●s I say I am far from sleighting other instructions ; but hold they are very good for ●hem for whom they may be proper , which they do not seeme for me . Because the more I read , or hear of them the more confused● & without coherence they seeme to be . Fo● I find nothing but saying and vnsaying as i● seemes to me , as in one place vrging mos● vehemently the necessity of mental prayer● and in twenty other places making it a mos● impossible thing to giue ones self to praye● without more endangering our saluation then before .

And where they treat of Obedience they treat of as it seemes to me in such ma●ner that it is almost impossible to find ou● how , or which way one may performe 〈◊〉 in any certain , or quiet maner . But th● more they speak of it , the more impossibl● thing they seeme to make it . And verily● could neuer put it together to make othe● sense of it do what I ●an , then to draw i● to this : ( as they expres it , ) that it is a mo●● seruil thing and much like that where wit● s●ruants are subiect for fifty shillings a ye● in the world , and no further effect coul● come to me by the practise of it ( as th●● seem to meane ) as to any true knowled●● of God , or my-self , then would haue com● by my being a seruant in the world , on●● forsooth by reason it is performed by vs i● vertue of our vow of Obedience , whic● makes them acts of greater perfection an● consequently of much more merit . But th●● is a subtile point fitter to be disputed then n●eessary to be beleeued . For I know , and that by experience that it is possible to comply with our external Obediences and performe them so that the Superior shal haue one in good esteem , and be able to discouer no great defect in our performāce of them : And yet th● soul as far from knowing what true obedience is , as she was when she came into Religion , performing them al that while but in a natural maner , of which proceeding nothing can be expected but a natural effect . Pride and disob●dience encreasing daily in the soul , which is an entrance ( if God preuent it not ) to vnspeakable inconuenience . But yet though I could draw no sure , and solid ground , for a soul by Obedience according to such instructions , yet the defect may be in me as to those ways , and not in the instructions . For some haue affirmed they find much good by them ; of which I am exceeding glad . For so souls may liue Quietly , Obediently , ☜ and Humbly in the howse , it is al one to me by what mean●s , or by whom God Almighty doth it . And there are some in the howse that I should adu●se rather to read such instructions then Fa. B●kers ( if I were worthy to giue aduise , ) And this I would do if they we●e both priuate men , but much more now these instructions are deliuered by the Confessor whose place deserueth an extraordinary respect which to my powre shal euer be giuen him , or any other in his place whosoeuer he be . But yet I must needs say that of al in this howse I could neuer see , but one who could discourse , and distinguish his points in , and of Obedience , and draw out of them a setled quiet , and satisfactory course , but that when he is gone they be as far to seeke as they were before in the vnderstanding of it . For another wil expres it in another maner , and so vnder al while they liue they must as it were begin again .

This therefor was that which made me so affect F. Bakers instructions at first when he deliuered them : because I saw they were grounded vpon God , ( not vpon him ) who could neuer fail whatsoeuer became of him . And by this regarding God in al , and doing al out of Obedience to him ; our soul becometh so humble , that it liueth in a maner , as subiect to al she liueth with as any one can be to any Superior in the world . She troubleth not her head disputing how , which way , and in what maner she shal obey in this , or that : but she simply obeys in al as far as her frail●y wil permit , and as willingly would she be the most abiect , and most neglected in the howse as euer she was willing to do any thing in al her life . For hauing recours to God maketh her insensible to those things so fat as may stand with flesh and blood . And God doth send , ☜ and giue a soul that seeketh nothing but sincearly to loue , and please him ) such occasions to humble herself ( which to none can be seene ; becaus the knowledge , and cause is wholy within herself ) that it is of more force to humble her then her being neglected of al the world would be ; though that be also a great help and a great fauour of God . For her soul can neuer be pure , and free for the ascending to the praise of God , til it be very humble , which the more a sonl endeauoureth to be , the more Peace doth she enioy , and the freer accesse doth she find to God , and the lesse impediments between him and her soul.

For this true Humility , and Obedieuce to God which Fa. Baker doth so vrge a soul to in al his Words and Books is an immediate disposition to that which S. Paul wished to vs . Which is that our conuersation may be in Heauen . And neuer was there such perceptible friendship loue , and correspondence be●ween any in this world ( how great soeuer their loue might seeme ) as there is between those souls , and our Lor● , and his Angels , and Saints in Heauen . Which though it be not so perceiuable to sense as the other which is founded vpon that alone ; yet by Faith , and loue the soul doth more plainly , and certainly enioy it , then we , can be certain of any thing which with our co●poral eyes may be seen : and such a confidence doth accompany his loue that she desireth not to be more certain of any thing . She can wish , then that she dependeth wholy of her God alone : whose wil is aboue al mast deare to her , and to whom she often cryeth out in her soul with the glorious S. Augustin , saying : That al that aboundance that is not her v●ry God him-s●lf is to her , but extreame penury . And therefor she feareth not any want of temporal mean● . For she accounteth it too great an happines , and honour that by the want of that which is necessary for the sustenance of nature , she should haue the occasion the sooner to enjoy him her only desire , whom while she liueth here she cannot fully enioy : Becaus none can see God● and liue , til which be granted her al thing● seeme as nothing to her . For she longing and sighing only after him nothing can comfort , or satisfy her soul while He giueth not him-self to her . Yet in this banishment she remain●th content , becaus Hi● wil is by her euen in this life preferred before her owne .

Although those instructions before by me mentioned do much seeme to be like the Iesuits as I gather by their books , yet I hold them to be nothing so intelligible as theirs , but more confufed by reason he would bring these , and Fa. Bakers into one , & make a cōpleat life for a soul out of both . Wich if he ( to wit the Compiler of those instructions she much misliks for contemplatiue souls ) can do for his own vnderstanding , and practise : yet I shal think he wil find few that wil be able to do in it as he doth ; but wil confound one with another , and he able with quiet and satisfaction to practise neither .

For those that cannot vse any discourse to be held to it , ☜ it doth them little , or no good . And those that can do nothing but by the means of discourse wil profit as lit●le by other ways . Now for my own part I do profes I could neuer find good : by discours● neither did I stand in need thereof . For it was an easy matter for any that could haue giuen me instructions for the way of loue ( which is by the exercise of the wil ) to persuade me that to loue God , & seeke after him alone was a most happy thing , and that it alone was able to make me truly happy : for I did desire this exceedingly of my-self , and was very desirours to dispose my●self for such a course betwixt my soul , and God as might make me mo●t pleasing to him : and make me not as I then was such a stranger to him . And this I thought was by me to be brought about by a means which I was very defectiue in ; And that was by asking of questions of those who were most l●kly to tel me what I should do to compas this my desire . Which I , failing in , and when I did ask was yet as far from knowing as I was before , I thought to get it by reading , and the more I read the les I did vnderstand : which made me almost quite out of hart . But going to Father Baker almost in a desperate case : He told me my way must be by Prayer● for which he gaue me some instructions according as he deliuereth them in his Ideots Deuotion , and refer●ed me for the rest in that point to God . Which he doing , and giuing al other instructions for other things sutable : I found presently that course of l●ue which I so much desired . And though I went so simply to work that I desired to know nothing , ( ●or curiosity in read●ng those things which help to this course is very dangerous though in thems●lues they seeme but simple , ) yet God did make al things to me so plain that was necessa●y for me to know , that I wondred to see such an alteration in my soul. Yea by may saying the diuine office ( of which meerly by my extraordinary , memory I had gotten a little vuderstanding ) he did so enlighten and instruct me , that no industry of mine own could haue attained such knowledg ( for this my only purpose of louing God , and humbling my-self ) as I had euen thus for nothing ; for my pains , and industry was so little that it was not so much as to be esteemed . And thus God of his meere Mercy dealeth stil with my soul ; for which if I by not humbly grateful , no punishment is sufficient for me . But I hope though I be so frail and weak ; yet his Grace wil in al assist me which I beseech you to begg of him for me .

It sussiseth not for the soul that there is in God himself whom the soul seeketh after ) Simplicity , or Vnity : but there must also be al possible Simplicity in the soul herself , for the making her fit to treat with God , and thereupon become vnited to him . The more simple or one that the soul is ( which is that the more she is free and rid of al thoughts of creatures which cause multiplicity ) the liker is she to God who is simplicity itself , & the more apt , and worthy to become vnited to Him . ☜ And therefore al the cunning , and industry of a spiritual maister should euer be by al lawful means to rid the soul of al multiplicity incombrances , blocks , and al other things that are enemies to the forsaid Simplici●y in soul. And indeed every image o● a created thing is an impediment to the said simplicity ; And therefor is to be reiected at such time as the soul is in case to apply it-self immediatly to God .

He that is a true spiritual Maister wil in such a case take great heed how he lay any thing on the soul least it caus the forsaid impediment . Euery soul of her own nature is apt to contract multiplicity , and impediments enough : and if she haue withal a Master to deuise , and lay more on her how can she be but held back , and be indisposed for the said perfect immediat treaty wi●h God And one only impediment is impediment enough , and hinders al.

The spirit of Simplicity doth bring , and caus much Peace in the soul for tending wholy towards that one thing which is o●ly necessary ; ☞ It maketh the soul as insensible as it can towards al other things digestin● and passing ouer with patience vnkindnes● & iniuries , whereby her life becometh pro●perly a life of Patience . Also as this simplicit● is grounded vpon plain , and simple instru●ctions , so is it , and must i● withal be as we founded vpon simple , and plaine dealin● with God , and Man . Simply intending Go● and auoiding al double dealing , and al v●due intention .

A true spiritual life should be one ●on● continued thread lasting from the time o● his conue●sion to the end of his life . Saint Paul reprehendeth those who are euer learning , and neuer ●ome to the perfection of knowledg . Such are they who yelding to temptations loose their supernatural light , and fal into a state of lesse light which is more natural then fupernatural and ●therefore is but darknes in comparison of the other light , and always is deceitful and erroneous as to the ●inding of the right way towards God . Whereas the other said internal light within then proceeded from a Superior caus or guift that is more supernatural .

The things absolutly necessary for those who shal begin , and prosper in a true spiritual course are these that follow . 1. INstructions proper for a contemplatiue life . 2. Secondly , an aptnes to vnderstand , and practise the said instructions aright . 3. Thirdly , a great couradg to withstand al temptations come they from within , or without that might draw her into multiplicity from simplicity : & especi●lly seare w●●h soon draweth one into the most pestilent multiplici●y that is maketh one more blind euery day then other ; and consequently into more d●ffidence , whereby they are made almost wholy incapable of conuersing with God , vnles God shew them their errors , and they begin again : which is a hard matter to do , if a soul haue once lost her light : which God I beseech him deliuer al capable souls from doing . For it is the greatest ingratitude that can be offered to God , and none but God can tel the miseries , perplexities , and difficulties that attend on such a soul al the days of her life , as Saint Angela doth testify with terrible words . 4. Fourtly there is necessary in the soul a good , and right iudgment for the vnderstanding of things a right For els the soul wil erroneously vnderstand al things though neuer so plain . The more she knows the farther she is to seek , and the more errors she falleth into . And better it were if such souls could be known ( which is almost impossible til they haue had some knowledg of a spiritual life : for many times they seeme to haue a greater aptnes then the most capable souls , and a greater inclination towards God then others ; and yet run into errour , and are in danger ( do what they can , that h●ue the care of them ) ( to breaks their brayns , or ouerthrow their bodys ) that they neuer had spiritual instructions further then for the Actiue life . 5. Fiftly , a great capacity of tending towards God by the exercise of the wil : which being prosecuted together with true mortification of themselues wil bring● saith Blosius , to a mystick Vnion , and ●perfection in time conuenient .

Of those that haue al these conditions there are yet great difference : for some haue more aptnes , and find les impediments then others , and some haue more light , and others les , as it pleaseth God . Yet those that are most bumble , and faithful to him though they seeme les cleare are the most pleasing to God , who be blessed by al. Amen ,

The Obseruing of the diuine cal , ☜ which indeed should be , and is the very life of a spiritual life , Is by most spiritual Maisters now a days turned into a scorn , or scoff . And therefor no meruail that true spirituality should in these dayes be so rare , and almost vnknown . Nay if a soul giue but her-self to prayer she shal haue an hundred enemies one obiecting against one point , another against another of her proceedings .

Euery one ( according to their spirit , and humour ( desiring to reforme her in they know not what themselues ; which if she be moued with , no other effect is like to come of it , then happened to the Painter who altered his work so long , and often that at last it had neither forme nor fashion ; And al other that had procured this alteration in the picture ( which at first was a very good one ) called the workman fool for his labour .

The Application whereof is very plain and proper to our purpose .

1. First . There is difference between Vnity , and Vnion : for as Vnity is but one thing , so vnion is a coupling together at last of two things . ☞ 2. Secondly , simpl●city is a singlenes , or being alone , and simple is single , that is a thing alone . And therefor simple , or single● and one or simplicity , and vnity is but the self same thing . 3. Thirdly , multiplicity is a many foldnes of things , and two , or more diuer things do make a multiplicity ; but one thing● & les then two wil not make a multiplicity , God and a creature both though of together as distinct things are a multiplicity : not becaus the apprehension of Go● being apprehended but acco●ding to Fait● but becaus of the thinking of the creature , not as in God ( for then it would caus no multiplicity ) is a thing distinct from God ; and a creature alone thought of without any apprehension withal of God if it be not to be tearmed multiplicity ( which it is in the takings of mystick Authours ) yet is it not most certainly the simplicity in soul that is required for vnion with God . 4. Fourtly , God is but one rhing , or an Vnity , simplicity , or a singlenes . For though al things , and al diuersity of things be indeed in God ; yet they are al of them but one thing in him . Yea whatsoeuer thing , or things be in him they are God himself . God was , and is that one thing ( which our Sauiour defending S. Mary Magdelen said to be ) only necessary .

The imperfect Contemplatiue spirits , who commonly in their external businesses are in their interior ful of multiplicity ; do yet for al that when their businesses are l●id aside , and they betake themselues to their recollection at the season proper for it● ( in regard they haue as it were a natural , and habitual propension towards God , and his immediate presence with a loathing , or at least neglect , or disesteeme of al creatures as to any affection to them ) easily surmont al multiplicity of images that could be occasioned by their precedent imployments , wherin their souls had neuer fixed their loue : as who were not , nor could be satified , or much delighted with them .

☞ Al the spiritual men in the world are not able by their instructions to make another that yet of herself it most apt ●or it to become truly spiritual , without the schollar herself do withal carefully obserue , and pursue the foresaid Lghts and Cals , as her primum mobile , or first mouer● And to say● Tak● al your instructions from without , is al one in effect as to say ; Tend not to Contemplation For God , and none but He is the true , and immediate Teacher , and Directour in the most obscure and supernatural way of Contemplation . Yet here ● would be vnderstood that vnder these tearmes of diuine interior Lights , Motions , and Cals which I take to be the ro●t , and cause of al her true Obediences , and other good needs : I intend , and comprrhend al Cals through other obligations as when th●y are otherwise commande● by the vniuersal diuine Law natural , o● positiue : by the Church , or o ; her huma● Law , or by the wils of Superiors . And ● true spiritual Man should do nothing bu● out of the said root , or cause which is th● diuine Cal.

A supernatural Discretion is miparted b● God to a welminded soul that disposet● her-self for it . which disposit●on consisteth ●hiefly in the vse of abstraction , and praier . This is the light by which God guideth ●ouls which he leadeth to Contemplation , ●nd thereby teacheth them what is necessary for them to know , or do externally or internally : so far as conduceth to the ●aid end . Simple , and vnlearned souls by ●he said light come to find out those internal ways most obscure of themselues ; ☜ which no man though neuer so learned ●nd acutely witted can discerne , or find ●ut of himself .

The most spiritual man in the world cannot instil this light into another . Al he can do is exteriorly to teach a soul how to dispose her-self for it . And as a soul that hath neuer so great a capacity for it ( speaking ordinarily ) cannot find it out without the help of some experienced person ; so one that hath no aptnes for it , al the teachers in the world cannot put it into her . ☜ And those that haue the aptnes can neuer find true comfort , and satisfact●on , but in con●emplatiue instructions , and being once wel instructed wil find al things preach them to her in their kind , nor wil she vnderstand any thing she reads , or hears but in that s●nse , if it be to any purpose . Finding that to be her only secure way , and al things to helpe her thereunto , if it be not her own fault , how much soeuer the fore mentioned medlers mislik of her proceedings , and misinterpret them . So one that hath not that aptnes wil misvnderstand al , or most of those instructions and wonder how they can be practised without falling into this , or that error , and taking this , or that liberty by them thus measuring others by their own vnderstanding of things .

This was always thus , and euer wil be , be the persons neuer so holy , God permitting it for the exercise of both . I mean only amongst women : for men though they should be defectiue in practise yet they haue it by speculation if they be schollers And verily I am of Saint Teresaes min● that learned men are not so apt to put sou● out of their way , as the vnlearned are● For if the vnlearned be spiritual , and no● truely spiritual : it is ineredible the Martyrdome that a Contem●latiue soul hath t● vndergo being vnder his chardge , and young miracle it wil be for her ( if she ha● not many to encourage her ) to hold t● the instructions proper for her , and which only she can prosper : and out o● which if he should put her , he would b● the first but only her-self that would b● weary of her . But if she hold patience ●● wil faire with her as it did with S. Ma●● Magdalene , that our Sauiour wil answ●● ●or her , as far as it is conuenient for her ●btayning the best part , which shal neuer ●e taeken from her .

Nothing is more improper for a Con●emplatiue soul then to contend , com●lain , or iustify herself , al her remedy for ●he most part being to come from Silence , Prtience , Humility and Resignation . I except where iustice doth require a simple re●●tion of the Truth to Superiors ; when the ●ood of her own , or other souls in the ●owse requires it . And that she must neuer do suddenly , or out of passion , or auersi●n , but it behoueth her to consult the matter often and seriously with our Lord , and in the meane time to behaue her-self humbly to the party , or parties and do them both with God , and man al offices of true charity she can .

The supernatural light , or discretion is to be nourrished , and encreased by al the external helps that can be afforded . And great heed is to be taken that it be not obscured , or destroyed : as God knows it may easily be , if we look not wel about vs . And the least mote of darknes defeats the whole sight , God permitting it for our ●●nnes , and negligences when it happe●eth .

This light is commonly neuer giuen but where the internal senses are naturally adapted , and made proper for the receiuing , an● vsing of it . And therefor extrauagant imagi●nations though otherwise neuer so deuou● or of neuer so retired natures are vncapabl● of it : yea are in manifest peril to mistake● at least of making right of vse of it , misap●ply , and misvnderstand ( to their gre●● preiudice , and others great inconuenie●●ce , and trouble ) this doctrine of the diui●● C●l . And better it were , if it were pos●●●ble , that such souls should neuer so mu●● as heare of the diuine cal .

This confirmes that old prouerbe whic● sayeth , one mans meat is another mans pe●●son , and so it is in this . For a soul truly a●● for Contemplatiue instructons can n●●uer find any solidity , or certainty in a●● other thing then this of obseruing of 〈◊〉 diuine cal in al things ; and finds that it 〈◊〉 at hand at al times , and al occasions to ●● her guide , and directrix ; ( such a capaci●● is there in our soul to haue relation to G●● in al cases , and in particular it is necessa●● in doubtful cases . For where he determ●●neth ●t by Obedience , or necessity , it we●● to tempt him to desire Him otherwise 〈◊〉 declare his ●il to vs , ) so as I say that 〈◊〉 the soul can find no comfort , or certain● in any other instructions so on the othe● sid nothing is more perillous to be mi●●vnderstood by those that haue not an ap●●●es for a Contemplatiue life , or the inter●al exercise thereof , though otherwise ne●er so good souls , and of neuer so good ●eaning .

None are capable of rightly vnderstan●ing and practising this instruction of the ●iuine cal , ☜ but they who are resolued to ●eny themselues in al things , and who ●ittingly , and willingly adhere to no crea●●d thiug : for if the so I do willingly re●●in an affection to any thing she is at a ●op , and can go no further . For God must ●e sought , and loued wholy if we desire ●nd endeauour to arriue to perfection .

This obseruing the diuine cal was that su●●●ly which S. Augustin speaketh of in his ●onfessions , where he lamenteth his case ●f darknes , and blindnes before he had ●●uen himself wholy , and seriously to the ●●●uice of God , and to obseruing , and liu●●g according to his Iustice . These are his ●ords . And I was not then acquainted with ●●at true interior Iustice which iudgeth not by ●●stome , but by the most righteous law of Al●ighty God . And certainly the better dis●●sition the soul is in of liuing and walk●●g in this light , and according to this Iu●●●ce , the better wil she prosper in a spiri●●al life , and the more cleare wil her way 〈◊〉 , and the les peril of erring ; for it is the ●ay of Humility , And no●e but the hmuble can walk in this light long , or find a●● gust therein .

They wil either leaue the light , or t●● light wil worthily leaue them if euer the● had it .

Thaulerus saith that God rewardeth 〈◊〉 works but his own , the purer our inte●●tion is in doing suffering , or forbearing , t●● more is it His own , and the more perfe●●●ly a soul complieth with her duty to wa●● God ( in that maner that he exacteth of h●● and is proper to her state , and the gra●● giuen her ) the more she pleaseth God . A●● in this respect it is truely said that Ob●●●●ence is better then Sacrifice : for we do ne●● fo much , if it be not that , and in that m●●ner God requireth it of vs ; we shal 〈◊〉 in blindnes and find no peace in our so●● for God hath ordained a certain way , 〈◊〉 means for euery soul , for her walkin● and profiting in the way of Perfectio●● And in that only wil they find their p●●●gres to consist , to obserue what it is 〈◊〉 exacts of them , and enables them to ; 〈◊〉 not what others do or can do , or h●● done . For as we al differ in face so ● we differ in the manner of our exerc●●● that are interior . As for example if 〈◊〉 who is of a free nature , and can ●●●dure , little abstraction should force 〈◊〉 selfe to as much as those who are of s●● ●nd retired natures , and ●o recollect her●elf in time of work , and other times , ●n which by order of the howse she is to ●eep silence ( which exterior silence she is ●o obserue ) shee would but hurt her ●ealth , and it may be her lead , and not ●●el be able to recollect her-self then , nor ●t the time proper for Recollection , and ●o loose al for want of discretion . Where●s if she should do what she is able , and ●o more , and abstract her-self by little , ●nd little as God shal increase his grace , she ●il in time be enabled to that which wil ●e sufficient for her , and God wil require ●o more but what he hath giuen , which ●ow little soeuer it be , we ought to ac●ount it more then we deserue , and em●loying that wel he wil inc●ease it , who 〈◊〉 more willing and desirous to giue then we can be to receiue . If we line so reti●edly as he wil enable vs , we shal easily ●erceiue what he doth require , and exact of vs in euery thing : for we being Reli●ious are by Obedienee , and necessity for ●he most part disposed of ; and for the rest we haue God always present to consult with , and when we cannot by that means ●e resolued he wil shew vs how , and where ●e shal otherwise be resolued . But those ●h●t go the way of true Humility , and ●ortification wil haue few questions after they are wel grounded , and instructed 〈◊〉 a spiritual life . For , for the most part 〈◊〉 questions do but tend to the winding o●● selues out of some Cross or Mortificatio● or easing our mind of some di●ficult● which wil if we yeeld thereto but put o● our eyes , & consequently put vs out of 〈◊〉 right way . Yea though those we con●● with be neuer so spititual , or vndersta●● our case neuer so wel , and of these I ha●● been most affraid of al : for from oth●● we can easily restraign our-selues , but fro● them vpon pretence that we may ease 〈◊〉 minds , and at least do our selues no han● if it do vs no good , we often cause 〈◊〉 prejudice and obseurity to our souls : 〈◊〉 yet when al comes to al we must 〈◊〉 that we do , if we wil be the faithful ●●●●uants of God , and profit in a spiritual 〈◊〉 If euer God do stand to his promise 〈◊〉 euer he did , and wil to al his promis● or granting when he is asked , and of op●●●ing to those ●hat knock : where , or wh●● wil he fulfil such promis more truely , 〈◊〉 certainly then in the case where a simp●● and sinceare meaning soul out of necess●●● and with al resignation , and humility b● at his hands the solution of that , that co●●cerns her for his seruice and honour , 〈◊〉 the saluation , and perfection of her-self his loue .

The more a soul holds her-self to this light , and walks by , it the more her light encreaseth ; and the more she leaues this light and walks by another● seeming light , the more her darknes encreaseth . The cleerer this light is in her soul the better able she is to iudge what is the iust and most righteous wil of Alm : ☜ God in those things which Faith , and Obedience hath not determined : for what one is bound to beleeue , and do for saluation the Catholick Church , doth determine ; but what we are to do for perfection there be many different opinions ; yet al agree in this that it must be the way of Abnegation , but for the rightly applying of Spiritual and contemplatiue instructions to ones own particular . He is the only able teacher who is the most true ●oue , and light the holy Ghost , of whom the Authour of the scale of perfection writeth ●o his scholer being a woman thus . For grace ( which Fa. Baker tearme●h a cal ) shal euen ●each thee by it-self if thou wil● but obserue ●t , and follow it til thou come to the end , al ●hat is necessary for thee from time to time , ●or God alone can only teach this way .

And of those who giue themselues se●iously to walk in the way of Perfection , ●aint Iohn speaketh thus . 1. Io. 2. 20.27 . But you haue the ●nction from the holy one , and know al things , ●nd the vnction which you haue receiued from him let it abide in you ; and you haue no need that any man teach you , but as this vnctio● teacheth you of al things , and it is true , an● it is no lye . And as it hath taught you abid● in him .

There are two reasons , or necessitie● why God himself should take on him , an● performe the office of a Contemplatiu● Maister .

1. The first is because he can and no● but he can ; for though the soul may hau● an instruction from another , yet is sh● to make vse of it but according to her i●●ternal Maisters dir●ction , and as if he , an● none other had giuen it her . 2. The second reason of Conuenienc● or necessity of Gods being the Teach●● is , that though man also could resolue doubts , and giue al directions both inte●●nal and external ; yet were it not only i●●conuenient , but euen impeditiue to her 〈◊〉 her way to Contemplation , by reason 〈◊〉 the solicituds , and distractions the so● would incur by such occasions as causi●● a life meerly of distractions . For in som● souls there do occur to be resolued fr●●quent , and daily , or howrly passage 〈◊〉 the forepart of a spiritual course ( espe●cially in the interior ) which of the●●selues are questionable : but such goi●● forth for resolution ●ould mar al in a co●●templatiue spirit , as causing a life meerly of distraction , and multiplicity , and those the most profound , and pernicious distractions , as being vpon meere internal matters : for solicitudes about the interior are the most preiudicial that are as to tendance to cōtemplation : becaus they most obscure the soul , and yet this is the miserable life of scrupulous persons . Whereas the soul hauing always her Maister at hand , and that neerer to her then she is to herself , and He an infallible one , and a most quick dispatcher , al the mischiefs of the precedent case are auoided , and she satisfied in her questions with al sufficience , and security . Neither wil it be sufficient for the soul in this excursions that it is iudged a reasonable occasion to aske a question by him ●he consulteth : for if it were a thing wher●n God himself would haue resolued her , if ●he would haue had patience , or els that it were a thing that for her mortification he would haue had her ignorant in : ☜ she wil perhaps incur much obscurity for such go●ng forth without her internal Maisters●eaue ●eaue , and liking , and withal such a check ●n her conscience that she could with more ●ase haue endured the displeasure of al the world : then haue thus displeased her be●●ued , whom alone she desireth , intendeth , & thirsteth a●ter , and to whom to adhere , & in here she putteth al her content & happines . Al he doth and permitteth seemeth mos● iust , ☞ and reasonable to her , and to liue interiorsly , and exteriorly according to the right Rule of his iustice , is al she desireth . These are they which ( our Sauiour said ) should Adore ●im in Spirit , and Truth , and of whom it is said , Al the glory of the so● is within , for the Kingdom of God is with●● vs , such a soul may truly say . I wil hear● what my Lord God saith within me . Th●● my most sweet Lord God be euer adored and praised , and sought after by vs al , an● blissed , and praised by al in Heauen , an● earth for euer , and euer . Amen .

Thaulerus saith that it is as easy for o● that hath an aptnes for an internal life , an● wil be diligent , and obseruant in it , 〈◊〉 note , obserue , and discerne the diuine 〈◊〉 within him , as it is for one to discerne 〈◊〉 ●ight hand from his left . And it is plain 〈◊〉 our rule , that our holy Fathers desire that souls should obserue their internal 〈◊〉 and the tracts of the diuine spi●it who is th● proper Maist●r of the interior . And it but a meere natural course that we can 〈◊〉 by the meere instruction of man , fr●● whom only we haue our first help , a● instruction , and then the souls capable 〈◊〉 liuing a true internal life are to be referred to God the only Teacher of the way of spirit .

And where it is obiected by those who pretend to be spiritual that following the diuine Tracts , Mo●●ons and Cals is perilous dangerous , and without al warrant , or security . It may be answered ( supposing alwayes an aptnes in the party that hath the instructions ) that as the power of God surpasseth the power of man ; so the warrant , & security of God which a true internal liuer findeth from God is far beyond the warrant of a mortal man : the warrant of one man being contradicted by another : that from God is able to stand in al the contrarieties , changes , and opposi●ions which happen out of the differing of al men in indifferent things : for as for other things God referreth the soul to the ordinary means he vseth in those cases . As for example for confession of mortal sins she most confesse them to a P●iest who hath iurisdiction ouer her , and for a true doubt she must not presume that he must resolue her by him-self , but she must aske according to discretion , and obedience ; and for her rule , and other obligations of Religion she must obserue ●hem out of Obedience to God , and su●e●iors , which being done , and also going , and walking the way of the cros , what warrant I pray you wil she need ( after her conscience is once wel setled ) from confessor or Superior . Wo be to those , at lea●t wo in this respect , that haue a confidence rather in men then in God . And those that praise so much the security of a soul that hath no other confidence in God at her death but so far as she is warranted by he● Confessor : ☞ for she cannot but by this means dy perplexed , and troubled . For to●day I haue a Confessor which wil warrant me● and to morrow another who wil doubt of my case . To day I haue one so precise that he wil warrant me in nothing , and to mo●●ow I haue one who thinketh he can pearse so far into al things that if I wil adhere vnto him , and no body els he wil● answer for al. He goes away ; and another who must assist me at my death com●th who is of a good meaning , but canno● pearse so far , as the other : He at first finding vs to feare , feareth too : We haue forgot our couradg vpon the others warrant going before , and fal into feare with him at the present : And yet ou● soul doth not alter before God a●cording to euery ones apprehension we meet with : if it d●d , or if this were al the certainty that were to be found between God , and our souls in Religion , we might bid al true confidence à lieu ( I meane those only who are apt for an internal life● for as for others I do not take vpon me to know their case ) and place our peace vpon that which is as changeable as the moon : to wit , the humours , and opinions of men in indifferent things . I haue had my-self a Confessor who though he had the largest conscience that euer I knew good man haue in my life , in what he pleased , yet out of the difficulty he had with me in his nature , and out of his aptnes thereby to take al I did and said in another sense then I meant it : he could , and did turn twenty things , which my other Confessors made no great matter of , into horrible mortal si●s , and would haue frighted me ●rom the Sacraments til I had setled my conscience according to his wil , and mind . What was I to do in this case ? I h●d been warranted by three former Confessors two of which were my cheif Superiors & Doctors of Diuinity ; and now this present wholy doubted my case : he had ( as he pretended ) agrea●er reach into my case then al the rest , and they were simple to him in discouering truely the state of my soul. But should I in this case put my soul into h●s hands , who desired to know al that ha● passed ●n my life to informe him in some things he desi●ed to know ●out of pollicy thereby also to tye me to him self more absolutly ? Verily if I had thus put my-self on him , I had done great wrong to God : and I might haue bid farewel to al true peace hereafter : but standing to my former warrant , and giuing him the respect was due to him , and being reserued towards him , I haue hitherto God be praised kept my-self out of his fingers . And also by the grace of God hope to hold on my way in tendance towards God , thereby raising my-self ( according as his diuine Maiesty shal vouchsaf to enable me ) out of my natural feare to the lout of God , Who is only able to satisfy , and satiate our soul. And not as this my Confessor would haue had me to plunge my-self by reason of his words , and threats of my miserable state : which notwithstanding his apprehensions is so much , and no more , as it is in the sight of God , who changeth not his opinion of vs , as the humour of the Confessor may be : but imagineth vs according to what we really are in very truth . But these spiritual men of this kind would be so absolute that there is no power left in the soul thus vnder such to haue relation , or confidence in God , whereby those for the most part vnder them , if they be poor simple women , of how good spirits soeuer , liue miserable deiected liues : for it is their only way to bring their politicke , and absolute gouernment about . And ordinarily vnder this pretence they do it ; saying that there is no way to make this , or that soul humble , but to bring them into such feare , that they neither dare speak , think , or do any thing without their approbation . At least so far they must haue relation to them , as it may serue this turn to informe them of what is for their purpose : and then that soul is happy in their eyes , and they wil declare that they are so to others : that they may follow their example . Then the perplexity the soul suffereth they tearme a profitable pil to cure their disease with al. And the confusion they suffer to see thems●lues disloyal to God and man , to serue their Confessors turn ; he tearmeth a suffering for Iustice , and warranteth them , what harme , disquiet , or confusion soeuer cometh by this their doings to others , or themselues out of Obedience to him , he wil answere for it , and therin they haue done God , and their Congregation great , and faithful seruice .

O misery , that al this should be fathered vpon holy Obedience the most noble of al vertues ! who sees not that this is a turn●ng of religious Obedience ( in those that simply desire to performe it ) to a policy abominable to be thought or named . O my G●d was this thy meaning when we vowed our selues to thee ! Or rather didst not , Thou say , be as wise as Serpents , and simple as Doues ? Thou didst not , say , be so foolish vnder pretence of blinde Obedience , that thou shalt not know thy right hand from the left . Thou bidst vs giue to Caesar what is Caesars , and to Thee what is Thine . By truly obeying thy wil , Law , and Euangelical counsels we grow wiser . But by pretending to practise Obedience , Charity , Humility , Patience , &c. in perfection before we be ripe for it● ( through perseuerant prayer , and concurrence of thy grace which do●h not such things suddenly ) we loose al , and liue in blindnes , and the highest we come to , is s●ruile feare , and meere folly . O happy are they to whom God giueth an aptnes for an internal Contemplatiue life , ☞ and withal some one who may instruct them in it . Verily the mos● part of souls in this howse● who haue been fit for it , haue been s●tisfied with so few instructions that in a manner they might be expressed in fiue liues . As for example tha● they Transcend Feare , and Tend to God b● the exercise of the wil , by which in tim● ( as pleaseth God ) al impediments shal b● remoued between God , and their soul● Which Blosius warranteth a perseueri● soul in his ●nstitutions very confidently .

But alas those that are not in this simp● way haue such an apprehension of a spir●●tual internal life , and make it seeme so perillous , and dangerous , that souls would be frighted exceedingly to read their books , and hear their Sermons ( which cannot be auoided possibly ) if they were not armed with armour of proof by God , and those who liue in , and walke this happy way of simplicity : Which whosoeuer truly walketh wil not condemn much lesse contemne those who speake against it , but humble themselues in al things : knowing that others who liue extrouerted liues may be more pleasing to God then they & that for many reasons which they may easily conceiue . And yet it doth not hinder these , at least it ought not , from prosecuting their ways to which they are called ; and in which by God Almighties : infinit mercy they haue so many books of Fa. Bakers own writing , and transcribing to encourage , and comfort them in al the opposition which G●d doth permit only for our exercise , and not by it that we should be put out of our way through our defect in patience , which the very exercisers of vs would for the most p●rt be very sorry for ; if it should so happen , how soeuer the publick instrument and other speechs do sound to vs . For who can doubt that is a wise man that a soul that hath a good , and found natural iudgment , solid Contemplatiue instructions , many in the house that practise the same doctrine aright , and a quiet nature seconded with concurrence of God Almighties Grace , and goeth in al the way of Abnegation , and Resignation , should passe many years without cause of questions about her interior . For who doubteth , but the soul may loue God more and more euery day , and extend her wil as infinitly towards God as she can , and beare al occurring difficulties with as much patience as she can , and performe her ordinary obediences by the orders of the house , and particular ordinances of Superiors with as much relation to God , and out of Obedience to him as she can : and al this without any great questions . Yea , the forsaid course of spirit , in a manner taketh away al occasion of questions at least of intricate questions , which draweth the soul our of her interior more then into it . And by the way I say this , that those souls who are apt to aske questions though they be neuer so quiet , deuout innocent natures , or haue neuer so much wit , and iudgement they wil neuer prosp●r in a contemplatiue course , and in those instructions . And therefor wil do wel , and much better to take the ordinary instructions of these days : and it were wel if such souls neuer heard nor read ●ontemplatiue books , and instructions ; becaus they mis-vnderstanding them wil make both them-selues , and others also with them , to lay the defect which was only in them vpon the vnfitnes of the instructions for woman : for it wil seeme to them that they cannot possibly be practised by women without perils , and dangers vnspeakable : which wrong done to souls put out of their way by this means ( who would haue happily prospered therin ( redoundteh to the dishonor of Almighty God . But yet as it seemes to them that they cannot be practised without great danger : So those on the contrary who are fit , and capable for these ways see and experience how little peril there is in them : for can a soul be too humble , and loue God too wel ? No certainly . And this is al the course of this internal life , and to this only it tends , to loue God , and to humble our selues .

Let vs therefor make that benefit God willeth we should by these oppositions , and contradictions we find and feel from ou● Order , to wit . To humble our-selues in al , and behaue our selues with al respect , and Obedience to them , as if they had done nothing . Let vs encouradge one another to this , and let vs not think God cannot be wel serued by any other course then this . For certainly the Iesuits who haue the perfection in their institute of the Actiue life , are in a very proper course for their kind of life : for that spiritual exercise which they yearly take doth them much good , and maketh them deale with the more pure intention in their action● , and affairs being also strenthned with a daily recollection w●● maketh them foresee many inconueniences , and thereby preuent them better then they who do giue them-selues to no such thing : for who can think but it helpeth a man much to proceed with the more prudence , when by a certain re●irednes he hath so much foresight of his businesses , and occasions . They haue also a setled forme or fashion in al their proceedings , and exercises which those whom they take into their order must conforme themselues to , ☞ how apt or vnapt soeuer they be for it in their nature And they hauing indeed the choice in a maner of al the prime wits of their schooles , are easil● able to find those , who are able to vphold , and maintain that politick maner among them . The main point of vpholdin● and maintaining of it being the exact Obedience which they require of al , and which al with one vniforme consent standing vpon , and performing , they thus as they do , vphold the same forme , and grow in al too hard for al other orders ; they being al in a manner diuided amongst themselues● and these of al nations standing against al the world for themselues . Besides the subordination is also much strengthned with the feare they haue , who desire to make any resistance how litle soeuer of being put out of their order to their perpetual in●amy and shame , and want with al of that which is necessary : which they are incident to who leaue this order .

This I say helpeth them to the powre of disposing without any resistance of any vnder them according as it may be most for the temporalities , and honour to the order . Withal they h●ue a great regard to the imploying of men according to their abilities hauing almost al the best imploiments at their disposing : ( and that is a great matter to the maintaining of their order in greatnes , for if they wanted aboundance of action their order would quickly fal into great desolation And this is the reason ☜ as I conceiue which maketh the Nunns of Contempl●tiue orders prosper so il vnder their hands● Becaus they put them into Exercises of discourse , and yet withal do not go about to bring their houses into that subordination which they haue amongst themselues . And besids they can not find these poore women sufficient action to imploy themselues in : and therefor out of the Aboundance of wit which they get by that superficial recollection ; ☜ they deuise , and make for themselues vnnecessary , and vnprofitable action . And this was in the light of Truth certainly forseene by their founder Saint Ignatius , ☞ when he absolutly forbad them the care , and gouernment of Religious women : and with this his foresight I wish he had so prouided that they indeed had neuer medled , or vndertaken in this kind : for better it is ●or women to be kept in their ignorance whereby they would be the more easily ruled ; then to be puffed vp w●th knowledge so little for the good ( and so far short of what is necessary for the perfection ) of their souls . Yet Hospital Nunns make a good shift with their instructions : which sheweth plainly that those who follow their kind of sensible exercises without going further , or looking after a more spiritual prayer of the wil , must be held in much Action , or els they wil be apt to make a great stir . But in inclosed Monasteries action sufficient in this kind is impossible to be had , or found . And there●or I wish with al my hart that either this course were not amongst such , so much as known , or els that they rested not in ●hese first exercises , but proceeded to the most noble , yea as Seraphinus F●rmanus saith , to the Omnipotent exercise of the wil. Which if it were now practised in our , and other contemplar●ue Orde●s as it should , qui●kly would they surpas in knowledg , and al moral , and diuine Vertues those whose furthest pretence in these sensible exercises is but to do their actions with the more deliberation , and consequently with the more humain discretion ; which it gaiueth indeed ; but it is but in a maner a meere natural proceeding : only so far as it may be grounded in Faith , and Charity , it deserueth both more praise , and reward then a meere natural action . But how far those proceedings are from leading a soul to perfect Charity which is the end of our coming to Religion may be seene by the few ●aints which it now produceth . And though they haue a great aduantage by their vniformity in exercises , ☜ and their agreement among themselues ; yet this being generally accounted to proceed , and to be vpheld by policy ; it worketh no great effect for the most part , further then by it with al others , and against al others to serue their own turn : which is a quite contrary effect to that , which that Order produced when it was in its prime , by hauing in it some great Contemplatiues , and when they did so much good and were so beneficial to the whole world . And different also from that which our order and others were , when in like maner thay flowrishd with Saints . For then the honour of God was sought , and al Orders with one vniform consent did concur to the aduancement of tbat alone● They then applyed themselues to seueral exercises in the exterior euery one according to his institute ; some more easy , some more strict ; some of more action , and some of les . Yet interiorly their end was al one , that was to find God in their souls . And out of that , perfect Charity did grow in them by those internal exercises : They did euery one ( not out of custome , or becaus he was of such , or such an order ) as God did require , and enable them imploy part of their time in gaining and doing good vnto souls . Then there was not such sollicitous , ☞ entangling , and as I may so say sole care of temporalities , God taking care of them , and casting them on them . Then there wa● indeed , perfect amity without interest , or fond affection to their impediment of louing , and seeking God alone , who is that one thing which is only necessary . Then there was no exceptions of persons , but they were contented so Gods honour were aduanced by any as wel as by their own order or themselues . O Lord my God , if this spirit might be reuiued again how much would my soul reioyce ! If S● Benets , S. Augustin , S. Francis , S. Ignatius Children were al ( as perfectly as this life would permit ) vnited together , and did with one hart , and consent seek and labour to aduance thy honour , and praise , as our Founders do wish in heauen , then would the spirit of the primitiue Church florish , and thy torne , and mangled members of thy Church be healed , and perfectly set together again ; Then sinners , and hereticks would easily be conuerted by them to thee . Then there would be another learning then now there doth florish in our order , and others ; for thou by them wouldst speake who makest the tongues of infants eloquent . Then they by prayer conuersing in a familiar , and tender maner with thee would speak so that none would be able to resist thee in them . Then their iudgment would be so cleared that they would vnderstand most hidden mysteries . Then an howre of prayer would instruct them more fully , then an hundred years study can do if they haue not in al things relation to thee the only true wisedom , and in whose light , is true light only to be seen . By louing thee , and dying to them-selues in al things they would become maisters of themselues , and al the world . Then nothing would moue them , nothing would affright them , becaus , thou wouldst be their comfort , and stay in al things . Certainly there is a wonderful difference between the Obedience which a soul that liueth an internal life giueth to a Superior , and that which we giue out of custom . The fomer is slow at first and seemeth very defectiue therin : the other so violent many times at first that it cōtinueth not longt ; he former groweth more strong , and firme euery day then other , and the later groweth oftentimes a greather burthen euery day then other . Certainly a soul that pretendeth to liue an internal spiritual life , and yet hath not a great esteeme of Obedience , is much to be feared , and in great peril of errors ; yet that which in these days is tearmed Obedience , I do not mean : for I knew one who hauing a Confessor that had much difficulty with her though he a●●irmed that it was a great breach of Obedience to haue relation ( while he bore that place ) to any other , yet she made vse in cases of difficul●y ( with leaue of an higher Superior ) of another , whom she thought more able to iudge in that which concerned her ; and yet she hopeth this was no breach of Obedience : for if she had thought that God in this case had exacted of her not ●o haue gon to another , she would ( what difficulty soeuer she had endured ) haue made vse of no other : But this she thought was not his plea●ure : becaus she was in a probability to fal into great inconueniences , if she treated with him in an inward maner . Who professed by his deeds , and words to take aduantage of any thing she could that might serue his turn as far as he could in conscience ; beside the d●fficulty he had with her in his nature made him incapable of iudging aright in that which belonged to her : for that difficul●y of his made him misapprehend al she did , or said . If she held her peace she neglected him , if she spoke she did it to sound him ●o serue her own turn ; if she was compassionate towards him in his infirmities , she flattered him ; if she offered him not that which he stood need of , she was auerted from him . And thus it passed between them which made her haue as little to do with him as Obedience to higher powrs would permit her : for by their orde● she was to confesse weekly to him which was no smal difficulty ●o her : but she knowing it to be Gods wil , did it out of Obedience to him to whom if we do as we ought we must be subiect in al things without exceptions .

And this is the benefit of an internal life that makes one capable of seeing , and knowing of Gods wil , and also most ready to performe it which way soeuer he signifies it to them : ☜ and makes them obey as readily and willingly a simple impertinent Super●or , as they would an Angel , or the wisest crea●ure in the World . Yea if a worm , or any creature we●e orda●ned by God to rule ouer them , they would see , and embrace with al their harts his wil by them , for without this total subiection to God it is impossible to become truly spiritual : for if we resist his wil in our Superiors in vain do we pretend to please him . We must learn therefor this vertue of him , that true Humility and Obedience may be out stay in al ; which two vertues together with the diuine vertue of Disc●e●ion , he wil teach vs , if we labour to become more and more humble : for seeing that it is his wil we should obey , and become truly humble How can we doub● but he wil giue vs the Gracé , if we ●umbly , and pe●seuerantly beg it of him , and practise them vpon occasion as wel as we can ? for he him-self saith ; When we aske our father bread he doth not giue vs a stone , nor if we asko him a fi●h he doth not giue vs a serpent : much les wil he deny vs what is necessary to make vs pleasing to him ; if we seek● or desire nothing but by true loue to be faithful to him .

O Prayer , Prayer able to obtain al things ! O how cometh it to passe my Lord that this Omnipotent prayer , as some of thy deare seruants stile it , should be so vnknown ; yea euen by them whom th●● tearmest the salt of the earth contemned , at least as to the practise of poore simple women ; for wom they hold it aboue al things most dangerous euen to mine own knowledg , as I hau● known affirmed by Superiors of seueral Orders ! O misery to be lamented most hartily by those that haue a tast in Praier , and by the effect therof know , how sweet a thing it is to attend only , and wholy to the prayse , and loue of God ? Surely the want of the wisedom which by praier the Saints did gain , is the teason why custome in al things doth take place ( for the most part in the world ) of true reason . The world surely was neuer r●formed of sins , and errors , but by the wisedom which cometh from God , and is far different from that which is accounted wisedom by the world which is as S. Paul saith , foolishnes with God : for the wisedom of God proceedeth out of humility , and perfect Charity . This wisedom did Saint F●ancis enioy , when yet by the world he was desirous to be accounted a foole , which opinion thongh many had of him , yer the eff●ct of his wisedom was euidently seen by the great reformation he made in the world .

It wil neuer go wel , and peaceably in the world as long as they are only imployed , ☜ and haue the spiritual gou●rnment of souls , who take policy for their cheif ground next to Faith ; which in the order and maner of their writings in these days me thinks they seeme in al to pretend : for they prize that most which may serue their turn , and suppres al orders but their own ( though not in plain tearmes ) as far inferior to them in al things . And that indeed it is not so to me seems euident ; for I know none , but may be compared to them in a● things , but policy . This is my simple opinion . If the soul hath not so much wit , or discretion when she knoweth for certainty or els doubteth of the certainty of a thing that cocerns her : or knowing the certainty wil go , and aske , it as a doubt ; or taking it as a doubt se●ing need to aske wil not pu● her-self to aske , I may warrant her from euer coming to contemplation . Whosoeuer are lead by the spirit of God , they are the children of God . As S. Paul said : If we were the perfect children of God his spirit would liue , and reigne in vs . But for as much as yet we are not : we are seriously to labou● to be ; and that he may be Al in Al with vs , and in vs : and his diui●e voice and w●● only regarded , and executed and none b●● his . And let vs take the greatest heed th●● can be of lessening the worthy estimatio● of the diuine cal that in it-self is the pri●● verity , or diuine way proceeding from it Let vs extol and commend it as we wou●● do God him-self ; and dispose vs , and ●● others as much as we are able that in al things it may be obserued , and fulfilled by vs al.

But O Religion , No Religion where the knowledg of the diuine cal is as it were vnknown vnles it be in speculation : or perhaps through ignorance is persecuted , depraued , obscured derided , banished , and sought to be pulled vp by the roots , and kept out of the harts of those that desire it , or are capable of it ! Surely God wil take al this as done to him-felf , and reuenge it in an extraordinary maner : except where inuincible ignorance excuseth this proceeding . But yet for the verity of this doctrin , or the general practise of it God wil neuer permit the gates of hel to pr●uail so far as to be able to extinguish it . Becaus it is the root , and caus of al sanctity in his Church : howsoeuer he may permit it to be lost out of the harts of some particular persons through their frailties , and the working of others . And surely , Nisi quia Dominus erat in nobis ; Vnles that God had been in vs , and holpen of late more then man did , or could ; Obscuratus penitus fuisset pusilus noster sol , & versa in densissimas tenebras tenuis nostra lux : Our little sun had been wholy obscured , and our smal light turned into a thick darknes by the late proceedings , by writings , preachings , speakings , threatnings , libellings , and other actings of some persons the Diuine cal had been exploded cleane lost and abandoned .

The Religious Fa. whom she cheifly points at for opposing the free following of the diuine cal and ●a . Bakers doctrin , did vpon his death bed repent him of it , and was very sorry he had done it , professing him-self neuer to haue been any true practiser of such spirituality , and that he had taken vpon him that which he could not iudg of : and he further declared that he much liked , and approued al entierly what Fa. Baker had written , and taught .

BVt God would not suffer it neither wil he : yet far be it from any man to say , or think that it was directly intended , or malitiously done ; It was at the most , but indirectly at sin● omni pra●a voluntate , and without any intention . But God only , and their own consciences know what hath passed therin by the occasion of the said late proceedings . I mean what fears , what doubts , ☞ what perils , what shakings , what internal probations , explorations , purifications , &c. Sed benedictus es Domine Deus meus , Qui adiuuisti nos , & consolatus es nos ; Qui ex mag●a tentatione magnum fecisti prouentum , Qui ex tenebris lucem creas , & veritatem ex erroribus & faelsitate f●cis magis clarescere . Mane nobiscum in aeternum . Instrue , conforta , stabili , veritas tua mancat in aternum , spiritus tuus bonus nos instruat , dirigat protegat , & ducat in via quae ducit ad te . De nobis caeci sumus , & lux non est in nobis ; Vine , regna , & splendesce intra nos dissipetur , & in uihilum redigatur nubes tenebrarum , & ignoran●iae . O vere , & sole sol ! adoramus te orientem , fruamur lucente , Qui●● deficimus desicientes . In te , & per the spiremus , respiremus , & expiremus .

Superiors in my poor iudgment after they haue granted , and declared most ample , and almost al possible authority to their deputies ( for the gouernment of poor fearful souls that raight haue been ruled according to Gods wil with les then a beck ) haue need to haue an eye , and good respect to matters : and not expect that God must always do for their safe-guard , that which them-selues might do .

They speak with little consideration , who say , it is enough to do what a Counseller aduiseth , especially in vertue of his place , or office : vnles they regard withal that the soul hath been so taught by God or man that she knows how to vse such counsel for her profit , and namely ●or contemplation . For if this were so there would not be such searsity of illuminated persons as there are ; and I haue known some who haue been so obedient that they neuer did any thing contrary to theire Superiors wil , nor refused to do any thing that was enioyned them by their Superiors : yea further were so inward with their Superiors that they seemed one hart , and one soul with them , and yet for al that they haue affirmed in my hearing , that they were as ignorant of God , and as great strangers to him as they were when they first tooke the habit : yea not altogether so feruerous and deuout as when they entred into Religion seuen yeares before . So that it se●mes either the Superior must be spiritual to make his subiect so ; or the subiect must be so spiritual as to know how to benefit him-self by his obedience , and other exercises , or els he w●l neuer come to perfection , lèt him haue neuer so great aptnes to a spiritual life , or read , or heare neuer so much to that effect . For where we read of great supplies on Gods part for , and in works of ●bedience ; either the subiect , o● Superior was an illuminated person , and had a great regard to G●d in that which was done , or commanded , that it was his wil , and what he would haue to be done in it , he did clearly see in his interior . For if some disposition , were not required in the party , or parties , for God to do , and supply great matters in the soul by that bare word , do it for Obedience , a Superior might by the command haue God so at his command and at a beck that he commanding his subiect to come to perfection , or to do such or such a work in such , and such perfection , God should presently enable the soul to do it so ; Though neither the subiect , or Superior knew what perfection were further then by speculation . But the expecting of such miracles is absurd : for God hath ordained another way to come to perfection . And neuer any by this course come to find out the right way , or euer attain to that degree of perfection which is so much spoken of , & euen out of ignorance exacted , & expected the first day of taking the habit , to wit of blind Obedience . Which yet in some sort , some who haue good , and quiet natures attain to ( but the cleane contrary way to that which they should do ) to wit to a blinde Obedience without sense , or reason : neuer going further in it or by it then to a natural perfection : which though it be much extolled by those that see her , and is better for her soul then to obey only in what she list , and no more , which is another extreame : yet she growes but by this into fauour with Superiors , and into credit with those with whom she liues , & into a certain natural perfection of mortification which little benefitteth her soul , and for which if she look not wel about her , she wil receiue her reward in this life , to wit by satisfying , and contenting her-self with the good liking , and applause of her Superiors , and companions , and thinking that if she can please them she dischargeth her duty to God as to her obligation of tending to perfection . But if there we●e to be no other effect of al our mortifications , and abstractions , and other Obediences in Religion ; I should say , Wo is me that I was Religious , But to this may be answered that by our vowes and vertue of our profession we haue a double merit for al that we do : whereas if we were not Religious we should haue but a single reward , and this the Church by her powre and the superaboundance of the merits of our Sauiour ( of which she hath the distribution by way of Indulgence : or by vertue of vows made by souls that are in the fauour , and grace of God , and consequently her deare children ) imparteth to vs that are Rel●gious . But t● this I reply that if this were sufficient the world would neuer haue been fuller of S●ints then now , for there were neuer more Religious ; and yet none wil deny that the world was euer so , without Saints as it is at this day since Christs time . Which playnly sheweth that there is to be some other disposition in the soul for her aduancing by the exercises of Religion . And that the hauing made the Profession , and liuing laudably therin in the sight of others , is not sufficient for her before God ; nor the pretended examples of former times : nor that blind Obedience which is so much extolled , and commended by al to be exacted in perfection of her before she haue found good entrance into her interior by prayer and abstraction , and can regard God in that which is to be performed by her , and by the good disposition that is in her so●l turn it to good , and not to the obscuring of her soul. For otherwise it wil be blinde Obedienee indeed and obscure her soul so that she can neither perform that nor any thing els as God doth require she should ; which if she do not , it wil little auail her that others like of it .

By which you see that only liuing in Religion ☜ and pleasing our Superiors wil not aduance vs in the way of perfection , nor practising a blind Obedience which hath in it neither reason nor discretion ; and presuming to practise vertues in perfection before we are come to any perfection is to break our necks for euer coming to perfection . Can a soul of a years standing in Religion take vpon her to be come to Abrahams perfection ; surely if she do , I should hardly expect to see God prosper that her presumption with an Abrahams reward . It is plain therefor that we may very ab●urd●ly oftentimes apply the examples of Saints to our poor imperfect case , and get little by it . Yet this is not to disapproue of a souls prompt Obedience , for that is most laudable . And those souls who are in a contemplatiue course , and end eauour nothing bu● by ●ntring into their interior to be able to regard God and his wil , or cal in euery thing they do or omit , wil grow more obedient & ●ubmissiue euery day then other and perform that which is said ; that they should be subiect to enery liuing creature for God . Which those other hasty , and inconsiderat persons who wil pract●se euery th●ng presently in its perfection wil neuer arriue to : but rather for their hastines ( if there natures be not the better ) they wil be found more stubborne , rebellious , and more hard to be ruled fiften , or twenty years after their coming into Religion then they were the first day . And then they wil looke for these , and these priuiledges ; their Antiquity forsooth must be respected ; they must be exempted from ptostrations , and if they haue behaued themselues more submissiuely , and obediently then others though it were but meerely out of the quietnes of their natures ; they must be obserued , respected and preferred in Office before al others , or els they haue infinit wrong ; and they pretend if they be neglected , it wil be a caus of others lesse Obedience , and respect to Superiors : who they say wil rather prefer others that wil not take it wel to be thus humbled then one who may be made a fool of as I haue been al this while , and it seems euer shal be . Had not Superiors better wink at a little want of too much forwardnes in an imperfect soul who doth it meerely out of consideration of her own frailty , and that she may not obscure , or put out that little light which by much labour , care , and industry she hath through Gods grace , and assistance gotten in her soul for the finding out , and walking in the way of perfection , and contemplation ? Yes certainly : it were far better for Superiors to passe ouer some sleight imperfections which haue no sin in them , in a s●ul who seriously laboureth for perfection . For such a ●oul wil giue , as it is giuen her : that is to say , that as God of his mercy , and godnes by her conuersing with h●m , by her suffring that he layes vpon her with the best resignation she can , and by obseruing the diuine cal , and wil , and liuing according to the Iustice of God , shal strenghten her soul , and purify it in his loue ; and so much the more prompt , and ready to obey wil she be , and giue euery day more and more respect to Superiors .

And there is one thing in this vertue of Obed●ence principally to be obserued , and practised to make it pleasing to God , and an aduancement to the soul : and that is that the thing commanded , and done be according to the Iustice of God . But to this may , or wil be answered that al that is not a sin , if it be commanded vs by our Superiors is according to the Iustice of God . But if this were so , so many more would come to perfection , then do : And it would be far more easy to come to it then it is ; But p●rfection , and sanctity must be gotten by others means then by persuading our selues , that wee shal come to it by simply doing , from time to time what our Superio● willeth , or biddeth vs . If with al we do not in our interior regard God in his Iustice , as wel as the exterior bidding of Superiors , and do it more out of the regard of that then the other : yea as much as is pos●ible ( if we wil do it wel ) we are to do it with a simple pure regard of God , and his cal ; for though the interior cal neuer contradicteth the exterior● ( for if it do , it is to be strewdly suspected ) and that for the most part of things to be done in Religion God caelleth the soul by exterior Obedience ; Yet it is his wil that in al those things as wel as in meere internal , ☜ the soul should simply regard him , and that as absolutly as if he by him-self had bidden , or commanded her . Neither doth such a soul regard who , or what , or in what maner God requireth it at her hands , but it suffiseth her that it is he that exacteth it of her , whom she in simplicity of spirit endeauoureth to regard in al things with out any mean of creatures ; Which maketh the soul indifferent whether she were commanded by an Angel , or a worme if it were Gods wil : rather to command her , and signify his wil to her by the worm ; not that she esteemed not of the Angel in a far higher degree , but becaus she would not make any thing her obiect , or do any thing out of any other respect then to conforme her-self to the diuine Iustice in al things , ☜ and regard him alone in al she did , or omitted . And c●rtainly let a soul be persuaded , or persuade her-self what she wil as a means to arriue to perfection , she shal neuer find true peace ( if she be of a contemplatiue spirit , and be not defectiue in her natural iudgment ) but by following the diuine cal , and regarding that in al she doth , or omitteth : and though she do al that Superiors command , yet to do it with as little regard of them , and as much of God as if he had immediatly commanded her by him-self . And so much as God shal by his grace ( concurring with her care , and diligence ) enable her to work in this obseruation of the diuine cal , so much the more light , she shal haue for the obseruing of it , so much the more profit , and peace wil she find in her own soul : and so much the more shal she walk according to the Iustice of God , of which how much the more our works do pertake , so much are they worth and no more : for as Tau●erus saith , God rewardeth no works but his own .

Where it is said in our Constitutions that after our profession we haue not so much as powre ouer our own bodies , or souls . I vnderstand it that by the very nature of our profession we are so bound to tend to Perfection : that we should do nothing but in regard to God , whose wil we haue ●here professed , to choos for our own , and whose Iustice we wil with al diligence perform , let him signi●y it by what , whom , and in what m●ner h● please : without any regard of our own profit , or commodity for time , or eternity ; and certainly in this sense Obedience cannot be too much commended . But let our actions be neuer so much commended , and applauded by our Superiors , and al others : if it go not right between God , and our souls , it wil be but little to our com●ort , or profit . And if we reflect vpon the circumstances of the Superiors command wh●reby wee may obscure that regarding God in our souls we shal neuer become perfect in Obedience . For as S. Paul saith , Powre was not giuen for distruction , but for edification , and applying it , performing it , and exacting it in an other maner then as it was meant , and ordained by God in and by our Religious Profession : is the reason that so few become p●rfectly Obedient : for by making our Obedience to regard Superiors in the first place ; for example to trouble , and perplexe our-●elues in thin●ing it must be done with this circumstance , and this maner , and at this time , and diuers other circumstances little to the purpose , or els I shal not performe my Obedience in perfect●on . This is to tire out my-self , and make my-self weary of Obedence , and not to serue God with alacri●y , and ●here●ul willingnes . This is to find his yoke intollerable , and not sweet and easy ; which certainly if it be not to vs it is our own fault , and not his . For he hath set such order , and measure in al things , that the more they are done according to his wil the more easily are they done ; for he is far from being the Author of disquiet , and confusion , His spirit i● Iustice , and Peace , and Ioy in the holy Ghost . And it is we that by our prepost●rousnes do peruert his Iustice , and cause that effect in our souls by that which we pretend he exacts : This Sir Thomas Mo●e the fa●●u● L●r● Chancellor of England B●essed , and r●now●e● Martyr of Christ IESVS was her great , great grand-Father . And so ( as sir Thomas More saith ) the vrchin wench goes whining vp , and down , as if nothing she did , or could do ( for some circumstance , or other which was wanting in it ) did please H●m ; W●● yet indeed is so easily pleased by those of good wils , and who intend , or desire nothing but to please , and content him , and seeke him simply , and purely , not any guift , or grace , but according to his will : that if there were no world but this and that my soul were to dy with my body yet I would choos to serue , and please him alone , and none but him ; rather then by doing the contrary ☞ haue al others my friends , and haue al the honors , pleasures , and in fine the whole world at my command ; and this though I were also to suffer , and subiect my-s●lf for his sake to euery liuing creature whilest ●● liued . For in this kind of life lyeth ●●d the greatest Heauen that can be enioyed vpon earth . And though he try the souls with diuers temptations , yet he doth it with much regard of their frailty , & doth so accommodate his grace to that he layeth vpon them : that they find he reserues that for to morrow which the soul was not able to haue borne with profit to d●y . ☜ And the soul so plainly sees that she of her-self is able to do nothing : so that if she had ouercome one difficulty or temptation a thousand times , she dareth no more confide in her being able to ouercome it again then if she had neuer done it yet in al her life . And yet she is so confident in God , that if it were pronounced vnto her by God him-self ( who can no● deceiue or be deceiued ) that there were infinit disgraces , pains , temptations , pouerties , and confusions hung ouer her head ; Al the care she would take would be to beseech God continually that as he prouided those troubles for her , so he may enable her to beare them without offending him therin , and in that maner for his glory that he intended by sending them : for of herself she willingly acknowledgeth that no feather is more easily carried a way with a violent wind , then her soul would be carryed to hel by the least temptation the diuel could suggest vnto her if he did not in al things by his grace protect her . And the longer , and the more faithfully a soul hath serued our Lord the cleerer doth it appeare to her , ☞ that whatsoeuer is wel done by her it is so wholy to be attributed to God , that she deserues most iust punishment if she take any part of it to her-self ; or presume by what she hath done by his powre , to be able to endure the least crosse that can befal her of her own self .

☞ But to return to that I was speaking of , I meane Obedience . I say ( in the words of a most learned man Albertus Magnus Maister to the diuine Saint Thomas of Aquin ) that so far as any vertue pertaks of discretion so much of vertue hath it in it , and no more . So tha● if a soul practise Humility , Charity● Obedience , and in fine a●y other vertue without discretion it wil more pertake of folly , then true vertue as the effect in the pr●ctiser wil shew . This discretion is the pure gift of God the which he neuer so aboundātly bestows vpon any but that they are al their life to haue relation daily , and howrly to him by praier , ☞ in which he teacheth them as far as it is necessary for them what they are to do , or what means they must take to know what is best to be done in al that they doubt of . For whether he resolue them by him-self , or by others , th●y acknowledge it to come fr●m h●m , neither do they desire to be their own choosers in this , or any thing els , and so it comes al to one passe , as to them ; for they regard him a like in al things . Neither can one generally speaking , apply anothers case to onesself without danger : becaus the circumstances may much differ , and so make that in them a folly , which was in another Perfection . Which many times we blindly do , ☜ and no wonder if we prosper accordly . For in al things we are to haue relation to God , and do what he exacts , and not what is the custom or what this , or that body hath done in the like case . And if we do otherwise we shal be as blind as beetles , and neuer prosper in a true internal , contemplatiue , spiritual life . And for want of wel practising this point many get no entrance into their interior al their life , though they haue in them a very great aptnes for it . And this point I haue before touched in one place of these my notes for mine own remembrance , which I haue written down either as I hard them from Fa. Baker , or as they came into my head when I was least obscured with the passion of feare , to be a helpe to me● or at least some little light when I was not so wel able to help myself .

And reason I had hauing so many occasions to try me within and without , ☜ and to put me into perplexity , and feare . For one in eminent place did labour ●y his ob●ections to divert me though not with il intention , but out of a pretence of putting me into a course more proper for me , as for example , becau● I was ful of imperfections he pretended that contemplatiue instructions were no way proper for me , and that I took too much liberty by them , they being proper for those of more tender , and fearful consciences then I was . And in fine gaue it me vnder his hand very resolutly as a determination from my Gostly Father , as in the place of God Almighty that those that gaue me contemplatiue instructions , and applyed the liber●y tha● was necessary for contemplatiue souls ( o● which he saith there are not two in al the howse ) to me , might giue me peace , b●● neuer true peace in God . These were his words which did so much astonish me that it made me puruay for al the instructions that I could tha● might vphold me in that which I found was the only way that I could prosper in , or be able to find our Sauiours yoke sweet , and his b●rth●● light : for I had suffered so much before God did bestow the fauour vpon me o● being put into a course that was prope● for me , and this for neere ●iue years afte● my coming ouer , and had faln into so many great inconueniences and miseries tha● none could beleeue it , but I that felt it● And though I made a shift a days to set ● good face on it , yet in the night I bewai●ed my miseries with more then ordinary Teares of which God and our blessed Lady were Witnesses of , though few others on earth . And I did rowse vp al the books in the howse , and whatsoeuer I found that any had done to please God , I took notes of it and did it as I could . And this course I always held since I came into Religion : as also to consult with al the men that any had found good by in the howse , and yet al this would do me no good . And me thought I Was as great a stranger to Almighty God as I was in England when I scarse thought ( as to any good I did ) whether there were a God , or no. And being thus perplexed , and tossed with a thowsand imaginations , and ouerwhelmed with miseries , yea almost desperate through the feare , and consideration of my sins ; My Mystris aduised me ●o go to Father Baker telling me that fowre● or fiue in the howse had found good by him , and that at least it was no harm to try , and it would do me no harme though it did me no good ; for he was a very graue man , and one that was much respected in the Congregation , such like words as these she vsed to me and I in my nature being not very hard to be ruled ( though I remember I had no great mind to it of my-self ) did as she bid me which being done I found my-self in fifteen days so quiet that I wondred at my-self : ☞ the which was so soone as I had receiued from him some general instructions . As that I must giue al to God , without any reseruation wittingly , and willingly of any inordinate affection to any creature : the which I found my-self willing to do . And that ● must vse prayer twise a day , which I found my-self capable of ; and though I found little of that which is called sensible deuotion , yet I found that with a little industry , I was able to vse it with much profit , and that it did make any thing very ●ollerable which happened to me . Yea , and it made me capable of vnderstanding any thing that was necessary for me in a spiritual life , and discouereth daily to me that which is an impediment between God , and my soul as far as is necessary : and makes me abhor to do any thing in the wo●ld for any other intention then out of the regard of God , and becaus God would haue me so do . And I find by , and in the exercise of prayer G●● doth find such means to humble we that al the creatures in the world could neuer haue found them out for me , and also sends me such internal crosses , and shews me yet so plainly what I shal do in them ( if I wil aduance my soul by them as he desireth ) that it were ●ut to obscure my soul to aske questions ●bout them , and wil , or nil I , I must beare ●hem . And thus I see that God doth so ●emper euery thing he layeth vpon me , ●hat it is so much and no more then I am able to beare , & is conuenient for me . And ●e thinks I see that any thing I ouercome ●s so wholy to be attributed to God that I cannot presume to be able to endure the ●east cros in the world , and should think ●t an extreame presumption to expose my-self to hazard , by wilfully putting my-self of mine own accord to the suffering of any thing but what Obedience , and necessity prouideth for me , which I find to be enough .

Thus vpon occasion I haue foolishly strayed from my purpose , and now I return to me matter of applying blindly the practise of Saints to our imperfect case : for God wil prosper vs by those exercises that h● thinketh good , and not by those of our own inuentions . If the soul simply regard God in the best maner she can , it wil be as easy for her to see what he would haue her to do , or omit . ( I mean in things that are not sin ) when to ask , when to hold her peace ; when to pray , and how to pray , &c ) as it is easy to discerne her right hand from the left , or the Sun from the Moon , but this w●l be if she go the way of abnegation , and not els ; and if s●● rest in God aboue al creatures and haue relation to him as wel as she can according t● her imperfect state in al things whatsoe●er either in a general , or particular maner 〈◊〉 the case requireth : for we canno● prospe● any other way in a spiritual course , or b● any other means then the diuine conduct● And this not prospering any other way● or by any other means then God pleaseth may be very wel applyed in some sort t● the case where the director out of his ow● head , and out of his own customs would haue the soul pray in that maner he hath good by : And if God lead her by anothe● way th●n he hath gone , she is wrong howsoeuer it be indeed . And if the soul be fu●● of perceptible imperfections in her outward carriadge , and if in occasions she be apt to ouershoot her-self sometimes in ieast , sometimes in earnest , then he wil determin she is not fit for internal exercises vnles they be very grose and sensible ones . And if she wil not beleeue him in this so far as presently to relinquish her former directions , she goes astray . I●to which directions notwithstanding she hath been put by the adu●se of her chief Superior , and found by prosecuting what she had begun that her soul was reformed by little and little , and that she was willing , ●nd enabled by Gods grace to amend any ●articular defects that the Confessor found 〈◊〉 her , and reprehended her for : only ●hen he misliked her course and would ●ot tel her why nor wherefor , but in a ●onfused maner she stood vpon her gard , ●nd held her peace , hauing before endea●oured by al informations she could , and ●s wel as she could to expres her-self , that ●he might do things with his good leaue , ●nd liking . I say she held her peace , and ●vas confident that her cours was neuer ●he wors for his fearing , and meant not ●y the grace of God to alter it : til Supe●iors by diligent examination of her ( which ●he most willingly wil accept , and giue ●hem al the informations she can , as she ●●th done him ) should iudge thereof to ●hose determination she finally meant to ●and . For my part I say , I shal fol●ow her ●xample the best I can . But if besids her ●mperfections , he by some inward dis●ourse perceiued by her ( when she was in ●ome darknes , and much obscured for that ●ime with the passion of feare ) that she ●ad some scruples of her former life which ●roubled her ; though indeed she had been ●duised by two who knew her conscien●e as wel as she could make them , and who were men of as much respect as any ●n the Congregation , and one of them her cheif Superior , and the other her directo● for many years : Notwithstanding I sa● she had both their warrants for what sh● did vnder their hands , and indeed find● her-self checked in conscience by G●● him-self in an extraordinary maner , whe● she doth in this point yeld to follow he● own sense , desire , and feare rather the● what they haue aduised her . Yet I say ● this Ghostly Father of hers should think i● not only fit , but altogether necessary t● bring her into al feare he could , pretending that the liuelines of her nature , and th● great couradg she had could not be abat●ed with any thing els then with lettin● her , and aduising her to diue into her con●s●ience , and case as much as she would and that she could neuer come to profit bu● by laying a good foundation by this mean● which he pretended was so necessary for some things which he discouered in her that it was hard ( if possible ) for her to be saued vnles she did proceed in this maner : what would you aduise the poor soul to do ? I wil tel you what I do , and vpon what reasons I do it , as wel as ● can .

1. First , for the il ground which he said I laid , he grounded it vpon , these reasons ● first was vpon the vnsetlednes he thought was in my conscience : which indeed wa● ●s it is at sometimes in which humour he once lighted vpon me . And as to this I comforted my-self that I needed not to ●eare : seeing I had done what I had been aduised to by the said two vpon whom I relyed in it ; Nay also when he was better able to iudge in my case , he aduised me the very same him-self . As also when I am in prayer , and most cleer , I see I cannot please God by any other means then by standing to the aduise that hath been giuen me by the said two in this kind . 2. Secondly , he grounded himself vppon a conceit , that I held so constantly to the cours I had been put into before he came out of Pollicy , becaus I would not be taxed with inconstancy , and also because I might loose the interest in those who had the same instructions , and that partly because they were many of them , the most eminent persons in the howse for natural talents . But to this I answer●ed my-self that as for Policy , I did not wel vnderstand it , and so far as I did vnderstand it , I did abhorre it euen out of ●his respect that those who practised it ( in ●he nature I vnderstood him he meant ) ●ead miserable liues , and must oblige them●elues more to the humors of many to ●ring their ends about , ( then the loue of liberty would haue permitted me if ● had had no better intention , ) and lye●● for the most part mis of their ends in tha● which they most desired , and perhaps vndergoe great disgraces in hauing thei● plots discouered : this I say if I had had no other intē●ion would haue made me abhori●● But I also comforted my-self with this : tha● since I first entred into this cours , ☞ I neue● desired the friendship or fauour of any creature liuing , nor so much as● durst wis● deliberatly that any thing should happe●● otherwise then it did . And when I though● it for the honour of God , and good of the Conuent , I did not feare any disgrace , o● diffic●lty that could happen vnto me i● that I thought fit to be done . And wha● I did in it out of other intention or natural inclination , I desired that God should purge me for it by any contrary succes in the busines as he pleased . 3. A third reason , he had ( as the afore mentioned writing of his giues me to think● as I vnderstood it ) was out of this respect● that I was cheerful , merry , and free , notwithstanding he had iudged my case to b● so bad , and perillous , whereby he might think that I sleighted his admonishmen●●● and was insensible of my own miserable case . As to his I had these reasons to comfort and helpe me . One was that refle●ing vpon my owne conscience between God , and my soul , I saw no caus but that ● might hope that matters went wel between him , and me ; and that I was ne●er the wors for his fear of me , and some things he charged me with I found my-self innocent of , and some others I found my-self guilty of I endeauoured the best I could to amend . Also for my shewing my-self cheerful , it was partly to beare vp my-self ; and partly because I thought that was the way to make him the sooner to let me alone , as indeed it happened . And another reason was because I am naturally sad , and had more then ordinary exercise as that time which made me more subiect to it . And also I find it necessary to be as cheereful as I can , becaus nothing obscures my soul , and hindreth my Prayer , and transcendance so much as yeelding to sadnes .

I also perceiued both by his writings words , and sermons that he in al things almost misvnderstood my case , that though he were very spiritual as for his own particular , and in a course that he seemeth to me to prosper very wel in , and which was apt to be much applauded by the admirers of sensible things ; yet he was far short of being able to direct a soul to Contemplation who was in nature , and by grace apt for those instructions that tend to it . And I perceiued also that although he could ●auour almost no books but those of Contemplatiue Authors , yet he stil mis-vnderstood them so in his application of their writings to others that al his proceedings turned rather to the breeding of a dangerous multiplicity in the soul , then to the riddance which is so absolutly necessary : that without the director help the soul in that , in vain is al he can do to her , as to her comming to Contemplation .

I also perceiued that he misliked the happy i●structions we had receiued , ( and which caused in me so much peace , and comfort : after so much perplexity , and affliction ) because some had mis-vnderstood , and mis-practised , and mis-applyed them . This I say made me much to suspect his sufficiency , as for rightly vnderstanding Contemplatiue instructions in which , and by which ( as I had experienced for fiue , or six years before ) I could only prosper , and liue contented i● my state . This I s●y I wondered , at because it did plainly appear that those who were weary of those instructions , in which other prospered so wel , were for som● notable reasons wholy vncapable of benefitting them-selues by such instructions 〈◊〉 least in these days when true Spirituality hath so many oppositions , and aduersaries , and so few that helpe , and beare vp a soul in them , and I say vpon these tearmes such souls can neuer hold to them . And therefor it were fit ( and he as fit as any ) they should seek to be put into a more sensible cours , which might be taught by man from time to time as they stood in need of . Whereas others who are truly capable of spiritual contemplatiue instructions , after the soul is once wel instructed , her director hath little to do but to rid her in al things as much as he can lawfully , and to refer her to God , who can only teach perfect Prayer , and bring the soul to true Perfection . But those men who think them-selues able to bring a fool to ☜ perfection of Prayer by imposing their deuises vpon her , and wil limit God by their pretending that she is bound to obey them , and can prosper by no other exercises then ●uch as they seeme to haue found good by . From such men I say God blisse al capable souls , least they put them-selues into their hands : for if they vnder any pretence follow their inuentions , and leaue the way that God hath placed them in , and would prosper them by ; the miserable effect wil shew how little part God had in this their doing : for as his workes haue most happy succes , so ours haue mo●● woful ; and if we lay it vpon Obedience we do God infinit wrong . Because the effect of Obedience if it be true Obedience , is very profitable to a soul , and neuer preiudicial● but it is when we giue that to Caesar , that 〈◊〉 Gods , that it succeeds il with vs by obeyng ● for by this pretended Obedience we darken , and obscure our soul contrary to God● meaning , and intention . And it is always seen that when a soul suffereth her-self to be put out of her way by a director , or Superior , that when she thinks she hath done al she can , as to the doing their wil , yet she is further from it then she was before , and both the Superior , and she mis of their desire . She because she hath lost her peace which made her capable of giuing her Superior his due without preiudice to her soul , and of doing it , as it was Gods wil she should ; the which now she finds clean contrary by reason of her peruerting the sweet order of Iustice , she being now so obscured that she knows not what to giue God , and what Caesar. And by this means the Superior also misseth of what he intended , because now the soul giueth him lesse then she did before .

We haue infinit examples of the happy succes of Saints though their Superiors were not always such as seconded them in al particulars , sometimes they being such as did not vnderstood them , and God permitting it for their greater good . And a soul shal always find contradiction from some Superior , or other : And yet if the soul liue in her interior as she should , it wil be no impediment to her progres , no more then it was to S. Teresa , Ioannes de Cruce , Balthazar Aluares of the Society of IESVS who was persecuted by his order , and his writtings supprest ( as I haue heard euen to this day . And Ioannes de Cruee besides other cōtradictions eight months put in prison by his Superior . And these souls though they might seeme to others to haue varied from true Obedience ; yet the effect shewed they were far from such matter . And these days there is in contemplatiue souls a more seeming disobedience then heertofore because there are fewer Superiors then euer there were that wil concur , or approue of their proceeding . But doth this exempt Religious from the right Obedience more then heertofore ? No certainly ; for their is no way but by Obedien●e to come to God , and no vertue without Obedience is pleasing to God . But it is an Obedience that regardeth God , and that doth what he would : And not a foolish pretended Obedience which is in the letter , and not in the spirit . None can truely see how to obey but out of an internal light giuen and imparted to the soul by God , who is the true teacher of Obedience , and al other solid vertues . And in these dayes where true Obedi●nce is so little knowne , and where Obedience is counted to be practised in perfection , when the subiect is punctual out of a simpathy of nature with his Superior , and can by reason of a quiet nature magnify him , and think that they must haue no other relation to God in his world then by their Superior , whom to please , and whose good wil , and good word to enioy is the perfection of what they came for , without further acq●aintance with God in their soul. This I say being now tearmed Obedience , it is no wounder the world is so scarse of Saints . God I beseech him teach vs that Obedience which is sou●d ; for the other vanisheth away as smoak as to any solid effect in the foul .

It is an easy matter to talk , and exhort souls to conforme themselues in their interior to others where there is no obligation , or any profit to come of it , & though it be against the streame of a true spirit , and ●al , and though he that thus aduiseth vs is heer to day ; and gone to morrow ; yet the perplexity that comes by such proceedings , if it be contrary to what God requires of vs , may sticke by vs while we liue to our great harme and grief . But were they that thus vrge vs ( out of a certain custom ) euer put to it themselues ? No su●ely : for if they had they would haue more feeling of others being put out of their way . I speak not of a direct putting of a soul out ; for that is to palpable of being il , but of a● indirect which pretendeth many things in excuse , and in particular more perfection , &c. But the poor soul if she be by these pretences put out of her way , wil find her-self both void of comfort , quiet , and perfection . For God neuer prospers indiscreet , and inconsiderate proceedings ; though we in them , and for them be applauded by al the world . Al that draws to multiplicity , and estranging from God , in our interior let vs blis our selues from as the poison of our soul , and any thing , or creature that would interpose it-self between God , and our soul , is an impediment to ●ontemplation Wo be to those souls , if they haue a capacity for an intern●l life , that are studying how to write and speake to creatures to the powring out of their affections . For by this means their affection wil be taken vp by the way , and the creatures wil be more regarded then the Creator , though the subiect of their writings be of , and for God . Much vanity I haue known in this kind , the Ghostly Father admiring the wit , deuotion , and humility of his penitent . And the penitent b● hauing her proceedings in that kind admired , published , & applauded by her Ghostly Father , was in great danger to vanish away in her own cogitations . These sensible proceedings often draw the soul ( do what sh● can ) more to men then God .

There are two things now a days by which we take vpon vs to measure other mens perfection . The one is by the quietnes of their nature . And the other is if we be Superiors we iudg , by the simpathy that is between them , and vs ; tearming them most humble , obedient , &c. that are most stutable to our spirit , and sense , those specially do so whose exercise is in sense , and who put much perfection in sensible deuotion . But certainly true Humility is so subtile a thing that none can iudg who is most perfect therein , but God ; and those to whom he reuealeth it . And this is the reason why it is said ; Tha● the iudgments of God are far different from , those of men .

Powre was giuen by God , for edification● and not for distruction . The which edification principally consisteth in the Superior-accommodating him-self to the interior diuine cal of his subiect ; and with that intention are al Religious professions made , and to be intended by the Professors , and Accepters of the Profession , and especially ac●ording to the intention of our holy Mother the Church , by whose warrant those Pro●essions receiue their validity . And therefor a Superior that neglects to proceed with ●is subiects according to such their diuine ●●l accommodated to the rule strayeth from the scope , and intention of Religious Pro●ession . And for the auoiding of these mischiefs , as also for the difficulty that the Superiors find , & haue in the true discouery of ●●ternal cals that are of meer spiritual things , I may say was the caus , wherefor the Holy Ghost ( who is the proper maister of true spirituality ) hath inspired the pens of the torrent of his Doctors of the holy Church , to declare , and teach that souls as wel in Religion as out of it , Are free for their meere interior whereby they may be able to follow such teaching from the Holy Ghost him-self , as man cannot afford them : though man may hurt , or destroy such teachings easily where God permitteth it : and themselues yeld to it to their own great los , and harme . And the interior is of that great , and infinit worth , ☜ and moment , that so that that may be wel , it is no matter what commeth of al other things . Yea then al other things wil be wel , if that be in good case by harkening to , and following the diuine interior cal which is al in al , to a capable soul. O wo , wo , yea a thousand times wo to a soul that is frighted by any threats , ouercome by 〈◊〉 temptat●ons● or cast down by yelding 〈◊〉 feares into that perplexity which make● her vnfit to heare , and follow what G●● speaketh to her soul , and dis-inableth h●● from following prayer , which Seraphina● Firmanus tearmeth for the Nobility , a●● worth of it ; Omnipotent ! O you souls wh● are capable of prayer , be greatful to o●● Lord , ☞ for it is the greatest happines that ca● be possessed in this life . For by it , it is ea●● passing through al things how hard , an● painful soeuer . By it we come to be fami●liar with God him-self , and to conuers 〈◊〉 Heauen ; By it al impediments wil be re●moued between God , and our souls ; By 〈◊〉 we shal receiue light for al that God woul● do by vs● By it we shal come to regar● God in al , and wholy neglect our-selue● By it we shal know how to conuerse o● earth without preiudice to our souls . An● in fine by it , we shal prays God , and be●come so vnited to him , that nothing shal b● able to separate vs for time or eternity fro● his sweet Goodnes . O let him be al in al to v● who can only satisfy our souls . He is his ow● Prays in which , and by which we are infinitly happy though of our-selues we a●● able to prays , and loue him , but in a very poor maner . Who can say ( that desires nothing but to loue , and prays him ) that th●y ●e poors seeing , h● 〈◊〉 ho is more theirs then ●ey are there own , is so rich , and to whom●othing ●othing is wanting that should make him● infinit happines . In this let vs ioy , in this ●t vs glory without intermission . When ●e are not able actually to attend to him , ●nd prays him , let vs commend our hart , ●●d soul to the saints in Heauen who with●u● ceasing prais our Lord . Let vs by them do ●●at which we are not able to do by ourselues . ●ea let vs desir him ( who is his own prays , ●o is only able to do as he deserueth ) to ●pply what he desirs we should wish him .

Let vs rest in him alone , and not in any●hing that is , or can be created . Let vs not ●eek the guift but the giuer . Let vs seek no o●her comfort , but to be able with out al com●ort to be true to him . O how little is al the ●oue we can giue him in comparison of that he●eserueth ●eserueth from vs . Where therefor is their ●●ome in our souls , for any created thing ? Let vs wish , and desire , and as far as it lies 〈◊〉 vs procure that al loue be giuen to him . Let him haue al Glory al Honour , & prays . ●et vs desire the fauour of none but him●lone ●lone , to whose free disposition let vs stand for time , and eternity as absolutly by our ●il , as if we had neuer had beeing . No●hing we do or suffer let vs esteeme great , for our sins deserue we should endure much more . Let our whole care tend to the magnifying of him ; Let his Honour be ours , 〈◊〉 Glory ours & let vs seek nothing but to 〈◊〉 wholy his : who is most worthy to be th●● He is . It is his delight to be with the childr●● of men ? What should comfort vs , but t● prays , and loue him . Those that seek him sha● find him if they seeke him withal their ha●● O who would seek any thing instead of hi● or any thing besids him , being he is not mor● willing to giue vs any thing then him-self● heere by Grace , and in Heauen by Glory● Let vs adore him in Spirit and Truth , al w● can giue him is nothing vnles we entirely giue him our selues , and that also canno● adde to his Greatnes , and Glory ; yet if we do this , so much doth his diuine Maiesty● esteeme of this guift , ☞ it being al we can giue him ; that for it , and in requital of it , h● wil giue vs him-self . Al his guifts , and graces are as means to the preparing vs for thi● end , if we vse them rightly with humility , & according to the iust wil of Almighty God● Let vs extend our wil to serue , loue , prays , please , and magnify our Lord to the vttermost we are able : yea without al limits , or bounds , let vs desire his Honour , til suc● time as we may be swallowed vp in the bottomles ocean of al loue , & prais God i● him-self in whom , and by whom only we can prays him , as we ought . Let vs loue hi● here as far as we are possibly able witho●● ●egard of our selues either , for time or eter●ity . This is the humble loue that feeleth ●o burden . This is the true loue that know●th not how to attribute any thing it doth , ●r suffereth to it-self . It chooseth not wher●n God should make vse of her , but accommodateth its-self to his pleasure in al things . ●f it were his wil to haue it so , she would ●ather for euer be picking of chips , or straws ●hen out of her own election be doing that ●hich is most admired , or might seeme to ●er to procure her the greatest reward . O ●ou souls on whom God bestoweth this loue●hink ●hink it not much to beare the burden not only of your-selues but of al you liue with : ●or God beareth you vp in al , more then you ●an conceiue or imagin ! Beware aboue al ●hings of pride ; for that cast even Angels ●ut of Heauen . A soul of prayer as long as ●he keeps humility is in little , or no peril of going out of her way .

Giue to Caesar that is Caesars , and that to God , that is Gods . Matt. 22.21 . If there be not som●●hing due to God which cannot be giuen to men ; or if it were so confused that there ●ere no certainty what were due to the one , ●o wit God : and what were due for God●o ●o the other , to wit , man : a soul would be so confused as to teaching , and leading the way of Perfection , that she would neuer know where to begin , and where to end● or when she did wel , ☞ or il . For certain● when the soul doth that by men , wh● ought to be done by God , and can be d● by none but him ; It goeth not wel with h●● as for walking in a true cōtemplatiue co●● She also doth not wel when she would ha● God do that by himself , which he would d● by means of Superiors , or directors . A●● certainly if a soul be a capable soul of co●●templatiue instructions , and be wel groun●●ed in them by help of one experienced , a●● walk the way of entire abnegation seeki●● God , and not his guifts , and be diligent 〈◊〉 obseruing what God wil do by himself 〈◊〉 her soul , and wherin he referreth her t● others , and walk with that indifferency th●● it is al one to her which way , or by who● God wil manifest his wil to her : She shal 〈◊〉 easily see what , and how to do in al thing● to please God best , as she may discerne th● Sun from the Moon . And this is to giue th●● to God that is Gods , and that to Caesar that i● Caesars .

FINIS .

Deuout spiritual Reader .

I Desire none other should cast their eye on this true interne spiritual Booke ; And I doubt not but your patience wil beare with ●he many faults escaped by a strangers pres●e ; And your Charity correct them by ta●ing your pen in your hand , and adding ●hat is wanting a whole word , a letter , or letters , and taking away what is super●●ous . One great one I wil particularly duise you of , to wit page the 19. l. 22. in ●he preface there wants a not . So that you must read , wanting not those , in steed of wanting those . For so it is in the original in her own hand . The others the sense wil direct you how to correct . Adie● .

The Approbation .

HAuing read ouer this smal Treatise en●tituled , The Spiritual Exercises of th● most Religious and verruous Dame Gertrud● More , &c. with much comfort , and edification seeing the feruent expressions o● diuine loue in her pious soul. And finding nothing in it iarring with the vniuersal Belief , or Christian Morality of our Catholike Church , I haue willingly approued it as such ; and set my hand heervnto , at Paris the 26. of March 1658.

Hen. HOLDEN .

The Approbation .

THese Confessions or Soliloques writen by the late deceased Dame Gertrude More Religious of the English Conuent of Cambray of the holy Order of S● Bennet , pious fspring of that Noble and Glorious Martyr sir Thomas More , Chancellor of England , contayning nothing but a true practise of that diuine Booke of the Imitation of Christ ( restored of late to the true Author Iohn Gerson Venerable Abbot of the same Order ) approoued by al for the mirrour of Christian and Religious perfection , needs no Approbation but a serious recommendation to al such as desire a true pattern to attain to the perfect loue of God by affectiue prayer and practise thereof . Sic censeo ego . Parisiis . 1. Aprilis 1658.

Fr. WALGRAVIVS Doct. Theol. Monachus & Prior Benedictinus .

CONFESSIONES AMANTIS . THE CONFESSIONS OF A louing● & pious soule to allmighty God .

THE FIRST CONFESSION .

MY Lord ; we often read in our office ( of the Breuiary ) that those that forsake all for thy sake , Math● 19. 30. shall receaue a hundred folde in this life , and life euerlasting in the next . This we read , and heare ; this was spoken by thy owne mouth , and therefor of the truth thereof we cannot doubt , nor in the hope ●hereof can we be deceiued ; presup●osing we on our part be not wanting of that which is necessary to the per●ormance of that which thou exactest . But tell me , I beseech thee , my God● tell me I say for thy owne sake , what i● it● , that thou exactest of them who shal● obtaine this thy promise ? for I see ma●ny leaue their parents , friends , ac●quaintance , their fortunes , their ric● possessions , contrey , and all , and ye● is it plaine that they finde not this hundred folde in this life ; that is the forerunner of the euerlasting in the next . For I see their state is a burthen to them , and the obligations of Obedience and religious obseruance is esteemed by them a great seruitude , and burthen . What is the meaning of this my Lord● Shall I doubt that those who resolutly , and willingly forsa●e all the world for for thee would sticke at forsaking themselues also , seeing that by forsaking , and denying themselues , they should find thee in a most particular maner in their soules ? Is such forsaking of ourselues to be accounted a loosing of our selues ? O no! but it is a most sweet● and happy exchange , to leaue o●● own● wills for to performe thine ; to be subiect for thee to euery liuing creature , is not a burthen , but the greatest ●iberty in this world . But ( alas ) my God , the reason why we finde thy yoke a burthen , is , because we beare it not with thee , by which only it is to be made an easy yoke . If soules who haue actually forsaken the world , and in desire themselues also ( which most comming into Religion are desirous to do ) were but putt into some course between thee , ☜ and their soules by those who had the care of them , or authority ouer them , they would not , as th●y doe , fly backe from their first intention , but would euery day more , and more by conuersing with thee , get more light to know thy will , & strength to performe it ; But being ignorant how to conuerse with thee , and how in all things to haue relation to thee , thy yoke becomes more , and more burthensome to them , and euery day they fall into new difficulties , and inconueniencies , and are in danger at last to fall into open rebellion against their lawfull Superiors , and some of them into strange friendships ; a thing which is worthy to be bewailed with blouddy teares , that harts capable of thy loue , and by profession consecrated therevnto , should so miserably loose themselues in powring out themselues , where , and from whom no true comfort can be found , or had . O Lord , remoue these impediments from those who are thine by so many titles ; lett them know thee , and of thee , that they may loue nothing but thee ; and lett them loue thee that they may know themselues , and their owne weaknes● and also thy power and Maiesty . O my Lord , how infinitly is my soule bound to praise , and loue thee , since by meanes of a faithfull seruant of thine , V. Fa. Baker I haue been instructed in thy law , and taught how to haue in all things relation to thee , my only beloued , by which means all Crosses , miseries , paines , disgraces , temptations , are most tolerable to me , I hauing thee so present to whom I may speake , or write , and by whom ( though I am contemptible in the eyes , as I iustly deserue to be ; of all the world ) I am not yet despised , or ●eglected ; for which infinite mercy , ●ll praise and honour be giuen to the● . O when shall I be grateful● to thee ? Or ●hat sha●l I render for all thou besto●est on me ? I haue nothing , but a hart desirous to loue , and praise thee ; but for ability to do either , alas , my God it is wanting to me . O that all loues might be wholy conuerted to thee ! At least lett those who haue dedicated themselues to thee , cease to desire any thing out of thee ; Send them meanes to know how sweet it is to haue no friend but thee , and to be neglected by all but thy sweet mercy .

O can that soule that loues her God For very shame complaine To any other then himselfe Of what she doth sustaine ! No way to her was euer sound , Nor euer shall there be , But taking vp thy Crosse my Lord , Thereby to follow thee . This is the Way , the Truth , the Life , Which leadeth vnto heauen , None is secure , but only this , Though seeming nere so euen . Those that do walke this happy● path , IESVS doth company ; But those who go another way , Will erre most miserably . And in this way do not think much , That thou dost much endure ; No , though it be from holy men ; For God doth this procure , That thou maist seeke himselfe alone , And putt thy trust in him , And not in any creatures liuing , How good so ere they seeme . For suffring by the meanes of th' ill Will little thee aduance ; But to be sensur'd by the good , Goes neere to thee perchance● Alas we shew but little ●oue , If we must choose which way , Our Lord must try our Loue to him , And not in all obey . We must submitt our selues to him , And be of cheerefull hart ; For he expecteth much of them Who be of Maries part . For she must beare a censure hard From all without exception ; But thou , O Lord , wilt her excuse , Who art her soules election . If she will patiently sustaine , And be to thee attent , Thou fauourably willt iudge of her , Who know'st her harts intent . For all but thou , as well she sees , May erre concerning her ; They only iudge as they conceiue , But thou canst neuer erre . Complaine not therefor , louing soule , If thou willt be of those , Who loue their God more then themselus , and Maries part haue chose . If all thou dost be taken ill By those of high perfection ; And further if thou be accus'd To be of some great faction , Our Lord will answere all for thee , If thou willt hold thy peace , And from contentions , and complaints Willt patiently surcease , Leauing all , care vnto thy God , And only him intend ; Yet what is ill , reforme in thee , And this will all amend . As farre as he doth thinke it good , Who is most iust , and wise , He will thee by afflictions purge , From what displease his eyes . Willt thou of all that loue thy God , From suffring be exempt ? O no , but blisse , as others do thy God , and liue content ! Amidst the various accidents , That do to thee befall , Committ thy selfe , and all to God Who seekes our good in all . Thy selfe art blind , and cannot iudge What is the best for thee ; But he doth pearce into all things , How h●dd so ere th●y be . My hart shall only this desire , That thou my Lord dispose , Euen as thou pleasest in all things , Till these myne eys thou close By death , which I so much desire , Because it will procure Me to enioy my God , my all . Where I shall be secure That none from me can take my Lord ; But for eternity , I shall enioy my only good , And to him euer be Vnited by a knott of Loue , Which nothing shall vnity , But will remayne , as permanent As his Diuinity . O happy houre , when willt thou come , And set my Spirit free , That I may loue and prayse my God For perpetuity , Contemplating his glorious face With all that him adore , Singing with them his sweetest prayse , For e●er , and euer more !

In this is such and so great comfort , and peace , that well may the soule be tearmed to receaue a hundred folde in this life , who despiseth it-selfe , and all other things that it may finde thee , O how free is such a soule to fly with the wings of Loue to the throne of thy Diuine Maiesty ; Neuer was there , or can be imagined such a Loue ; as is betweene an humble soule , and thee . Who can expresse : what passeth between such a soule , and thee ? Verily neither man , nor Angell is able to do it sufficiently ; and the more such a soule knowes of thee , the more sound becometh her humility , the which thy selfe only can teach one perfectly ; and it is impossible to gett it in verity , and perfection , but by conuersing with thee . O my God bestow this heauenly gift on me , which only findeth fauour before thee . Those that possesse it are able in , and by thee to beare all things , to vnderstand all things as farre as it is necessary for them . For one learneth more in Prayer of thee in one hower , then all creatures in the world could teach one in fifty yeares ; for that which thou teachest is sound , solid , and secure ; because it tends to nothing but to loue thee , & neglect it selfe . Thy words bring force & strength in themselues ; thy words are words of peace to the soule ; thy words are not like the words of men , which passe , as a sound through the ayr ; bu● thyne pearse the very bottome of our soules ; Lett me hearken therefore to thee , who speaketh loue and most certaine truth ; The wisedome of the world is foolishnes before thee ; But thy wisedome is much to be desired , and for it willingly ought we to giue all our substance ; to it we ought to be espowsed ; and by it if we will be happy , all our actions ought to be gouerned . Allthough thou didst say , Math● 18. 3. that vnlesse we become as litle children we could not enter into the kingdome of heauen , yet withall thou hast said , Math● 10 , 16. that we ought to be wise as serpents , and simple as doues ; where thou puttest that we should be wise before we be simple , and not simplicity before wisedome ; whereof I aske thee the reason , O my Lord , with all the humility I am possibly able . For it seems to me● that therein● as in all thy words , there is a hidden Mystery ; tell me , I say , my God ( of whom in all cases , and doubts I aske solution , and many times by it thou dost make many things manifest to my simplicity ; ) tell me ● say ) what was the reason ? Verily it seemeth to me , that thou biddest vs be wise before we become simple , becaus that is only true Simplicity , which followeth true Wisedome . For we cannot become truly simplified in our soule , but by thy heauenly gift of true wisedome . For there is a simplicity which is without wisedome , and discretion , which litle auayleth to perfection . This vertue of Simplicity becometh more , and more perfect in the soule , as she increaseth in humility , and charity ; yet at the very first of our conuersion this is in some sort practised by vs , if we do as we ought to do . As for example ; to become pleasing to thee , it is absolutly necessary that a soule walke simply and sincerly before thy selfe and all men ; and read , and heare , obey , and per●forme all in a simple , and humble maner ; not searching into that which belongeth not vnto her ; this ( I say ) thou dost exact ; for nothing is more odious to thee , then the contrary practise ; But yet this doth not diminish our naturall reason ; but maketh it more cleere , and able to comprehend what is necessary for vs . This vertue also therefor bestow vpon me , who euen in my nature ( as thou well knowest ) did euer aboue all things hate dissembling , and dissimulation . O Lord , poore as I am , and most sinnefull , thus thou ●eest how I presume to speake vnto ●h●e ; but easily shall I obtayn pardon of thee , becaus thou ouerflowest with ●he aboundance of thy mercy ; for wh●ch Glory , Prayse , Adoration be to thee , who art my Lord , and my God , and only desired by me . I haue no friend to speake , or treat with but thee , and some of thy Saints , to whom thou hast giuen charge of me , and to whom I fly when my sinnes affright me ; amongst whom next after thy Deare Mother , the Queene of mercy , is my beloued S. Augustine .

O Glorious Saint whose hart did burne , And flame with Loue Diuine , Remember me most sinnefull wretch , Who hunger staru'd doth pine . For want of that which thou enioyest In such aboundant measure ; It is my God that I doe meane , My ioy , and all my treasure . Thy words O Saint are truly sweet , Becaus thou dost addresse Them vnto him who 's only meet Our mis'ries to redresse .

At whose intorcession much hast thou done for me ; Honour them , my Lord for me who am so poore that● haue nothing to present them , or thee ; only a desire of being gratefull to thee , who be by all eternally pray●sed . Amen . ( It was S. Augustine the Doctor and amorous seruant of God , that she heere meant . )

THE SECOND CONFESSION . Omnis ex vobis qui non renunti at omnibus quae possident , Luk. 14. non potest meus esse discipulus . Qui habet aures audiendi audiat . All you who renounce not all you possesse , cannot be my disciple , who hath eares of hearing let him heare .

THESE are thy words , my Lord which though they seeme hard at first , yet being explicated to our soules by thee , they become most easy , and sweet to performe ; Teach me therefor my God , I beseech thee for thy mercies sake , teach me I say , how I ●hall perform this to the glory of thy●oly ●oly name ; Thou hast inflamed my ●art , as thou knowest , with such a con●inuall desire , and longing after thee , ●hat it seemeth easy to me to performe whatsoeuer is exacted by thee . For ●hough I be fraile aboue all I can expresse , or imagin , yet I am confident in thee , by whose helpe and power it is possible to giue me to do all that it pleaseth thee to exact of me ; Psal. 142. Teach me to do thy will , becaus thou art my God . Lett me Loue thee , becaus to want thy Loue is a most grieuous affliction to me . Farre as thou knowest , it is from me to haue willingly a deuided hart to thee . Is it possible that hauing but one soule , & hart , I should bestow any of the affection they are capable of , on any thing but thee ? O fa●r be this from me ; Nothing that could happen to my soule would so afflict , and discomfort me , as to see it adhered to any created thing , or to it very-selfe , willingly , to the impediment of my being wholy possessed by thee . Make me that thou wouldst haue me , that I may as thou exactest , prayse thee . This shall be my study , my care , and all my endeauour , to sing in my hart songs of Loue to thee , who art only desired and sought after by me ; In thy prayse I am only happy ; in which my ioy , I will exullt with all that loue thee , For what can be a comfort to me , while I liue seperated from thee , but only to remember , that my God , who is more myne , then I am my owne , is absolutly and infinitly happy ? O lett this thy Loue wholy transforme me into it selfe , that I may become insensible to all created things whatsoeuer ; Lett me be wholy possessed by thee , who by so many titles laieth claime to me . Can I say , or think that any thing is worthy of loue but thee ? O , no ; but if I had then thowsand harts , all were to ● little to bestow vpon thee● Shall● I any more be so miserable , ☞ as by louing , hauing , adhering to , or desiring any created thing , to become estranged from thee , in whom I haue placed all my hope , loue , and desire● I haue indeed chosen thee for my only loue , light , hope , comfort , refuge , ●elight , and whatsoeuer ells can be desired , or imagined , but it was not of ●y selfe ; but thy mercy and goodnes ●nforced me , euen whither I would 〈◊〉 no , by sending me the meanes to now how to serue thee , and withall ●iuing me grace of loathing all wh●ch was not to be a helpe to me . O ●●ese thy mercies when I recount be●ore thee , euen depriueth me of my ●ery senses , to see thee to haue been so ●ood , & mercifull to her , who as it is ●ade plaine to me by thee , hath offen●ed , and been more vngratefull to thee●hen ●hen any I did either see , or heare off . ●hall not I therefor humble my soule ●efore thee , and at the feet of all for the ●●●e of thee , who hath been thus tender of her good , who of all thine is the last , ●nd least , and most contemptible ; the ●hich being so apparent to me , I will ●et more and more humble my self ●y desiring to be despised by all , for ●●y honour , and glory . Thus , my Lord , ●ust , and ashes presumeth to speake ●nto thee ; and sitting alone I read what write of thee , and calling to minde what thou hast done for me , I reioye● in the multitude of thy mercy . Fo● nothing can heere be found in what I heere write for my comfort , being bannished from him whom till I may enioy as he is in himselfe nothing will ● rest in ; for nothing can satiat me . Yet as I say , it alaieth my grief for hauing offended thee , and of being thus remo●te from my beginning ( to which mos● ardently I long to returne as pure , as I was created by thee ) This my speaking in all my misery to Thee . None therefor● can wonder at me . For as one who desi●reth the prefence of her beloued , and expecteth when it shall be , can take no comfort till she see whom she so much desireth ; In the meane while spending her tyme , sometymes with thinking that this ioy to her will shortly be , and sometymes being wearied with long expectation , she employeth her self in some thing which may a litle recrea● her hart , while thus with her it must be ; and aboue all it is a pleasure to her to heare of him , which she cannot ●et see . Thus , O Lord , it passeth euen ●n that loue , which will , and deserueth ●o passe ; which none deserueth but ●●ou . And there is no comparison able ●o expresse the loue which is between a faithfull soule , and thee . For the more we loue thee , the more pure and quiet ●ecometh the soule by this thy heauenly charity , Whereas , alas ! it fareth ●arre otherwise with vs when we loue any thing out of thee , & which , is an im●ediment to thy Loue ; which misery before thee , in the bitternes of my sou●e , I bemoane ; becaus thou hauing made our soule so capable of thy diuine Loue , and so able to haue relation in all to thee , it is an ingratitude able to ●s●onish me , that we should east away our loue vpon that which is so litle able● to satisfy our soule , and whereof there is as litle certainty as there is of the ●ind ; yea euen in a moment we loose the fauour , and opinion of one , vpon whom we haue bestowed much tyme in winning it . O folly , which be henceforth farre from me ! Lett that infinit extent , and desirable freedom of my will , powre it selfe out wholy vpon thee , that at last i● may become perfectly vnited to thy diuine Maiesty . O how litle worth ( when ● am with thee ) is the desiring of the prayse , applause , and commendation of men , who are now o● one mind , and now of another , nothing being permanent vnder the sunn . Verily when in thy light I see this truth , it seemeth to me to be an intolerable burthen to be esteemed , and praised by men , whose fauour often maketh vs incurre thy displeasure● at least my frailty causeth it so to me . Helpe me therefor , and make me by all to become truly humble , and pleasing to thee who be adored three and one for all eternity , to thy infinit glory . Amen .

THE THIRD CONFESSION .

O That I were able to winne the harts of the whole world to thee ! which seeing I am not able to doe , lett me be no lett at least to any soules of ●eing thee . All loue and prayse is due ●nto thee , and all paine , reproach , confusion , and shame vnto me , which ●rant I may beare without offending thee , and then a thousande times wellcome be any of them , which may in●rease my loue to thee . O let me forsak all for thee , which thou willest vs to do , that we may find thee ! What is this thou saiest ( tell me thy poore seruant ) leaue all ? Haue I any thing to leaue which is not more burthensome to keepe , then it is paine to leaue . If I seeke my selfe , what do I labour for , but my owne paine ? If I forsake my selfe for thee , behold a most sweet peace is found by me . Thus there for are thy Lawes ; The more perfectly we performe them , the more delightfull is thy yoke . They were made by thee out of thy loue to vs ; and if we loue , they will be most easy , and pleasant to vs . For indeed where thou biddest vs leaue and forskae all , that we may find rest in our soules , thou speakest to vs , as being sensuall . For when we leaue our freinds , riches , honours , pleasures , yea and euen ( which is most of all ) our very selues , wha● haue we left , or forsaken ? Some thin● indeed , as it seemes to vs , these thing are , when through blindnes , and igno●rance , we esteeme them as benefit and comforts ; but doing it vpon 〈◊〉 word , we find we haue left nothing , ●● find thee who art all things . We haue left our friends , who are incident to leaue vs , when we stand in most need of them . We haue left honour , which being had proueth nothing ells but● meere burthen to vs . And so in fine nothing is there to be left , which if 〈◊〉 did but loue our owne peace and qui●● without all further respect , we would choose as the very best what thou do●● exact . For vertue is amiable in it self● and those that had but a very shew of it , as to what it is indeed , euen among the Heathēs were honoured for God● Who therefor would not follow the my God , in whom alone is to be foun● true good ? Thou teachest the milde and humble , thy wayes , and thou rest● willingly in a peacefull hart . What ca● bring true peace to our soule , but t●● ●oue ? Giue this Loue therefor to me , ●ho wisheth and de●ireth only , that ●n all I may be true to thee .

THE FOVRTH CONFESSION .

O My Lord and my God , to whom I dust and ashes am not worthy to speak ! Yet heare me my Lord recounting heere before thee thy owne ●ords spoaken by thy seruant in thy name , who art truth it selfe . Psal. 33. 12. Venife filij ●●●ite me , timorem Domini docebo vos . Pro●ibe ling●am tuam è malo , & labia tua ne ●juantur dolum . Diuerte à malo , & fac ●nam ; inquire pacem , & persequere eam . Psal. 33. 14. Conte ô Sonns Hear● mee I will ●each you the ●eare of our Lord . Forbid thy tongue from euil , ● thy lips that they speake not guile , turne ●rom euil and do good , seeke peace , & pro●ecute itt . Heere thou biddest me as thy child come to thee , and thou willt teach ●e thy feare , as that thou art my Lord . ●eere thou biddest me refrain my ton●ue from guile , and my lippes that they spea●k not guile , and also hate euill , and do good , inquire afte● peace and follow it , these last words in●deed comprehending all . But of who● shall I inquire peace my Lord , & my Go● of whom I say , shall I inquire to lea● it ? Truely of thy selfe , who in teachin● me the way of peaoe , canst giue me gra●ce to follow it . Of thee therefor I desi●re to learn , whose words are work● Speak to my hart ; speak so that I may heare , and follow it ; Giue me the Humility which knoweth no guile ; Giue me the Loue that accompanieth it . L●● thou knowest that there was neuer more necessity of begging in this kind thy helpe ; because humble Loue is now of the world allmost vnknown , yea euen of them who should teach it the res●● the wisedome of thy truth is sett a side● and that which is the wisedome of the world beareth sway ouer all ; out of which it groweth , that euen Humility , Obedience , and Charity ( the most noble vertues that are , or can be ) are exacted and practised euen by way of humaine policy , which maketh so litle vnion in the world be●weene them ●hose whole study ought to b● , how they might loue , and draw most forci●ly all the harts , and soules in the ●orld to the pure loue of thee . O Lord how farr haue our sinns cast vs from ●hee ! In lighten my soule , O Lord , I ●umbly beseech thee , while heere , to my greif , I do in the bitternes of my soule , rehearse these things befor ●hee , whom I ( most contemptible , and ●nworthy ) find in all so willing to ●ear , and help me . If we would loue , we should aboundantly partake of ●hee . For nothing is held by thee too deare for them , who alone aboue all creatures , and comforts seek the pure ●oue of thee . Out of this true loue bet●een a soul and thee , there ariseth such a knowledg in the soul , that it ●oatheth all that is an impediment to ●er further proceeding in the Loue of thee . O Loue , Loue , euen by naming ●hee , my soul looseth it self in ●hee ! Nothing can satiat my soul my Lord , as it is well known to thee , but ●o be swallowed vp in thee for all eternity . No knowledg which heer we can haue of thee , can satisfy my soul seeking , and longing without ceasing after thee . By faith we are certain of thee , and by Loue we in some sort experience in our soules thy greatnes , and goodnes , thy beawty , and sweetnes , which more confirmeth vs in the hope of thee . O what knowledg is to be compared to that which is taught the humble by thee , which tendeth yet only to thy making her vnderstand her owne nothing , and meer dependance of thee . Thy words , ( as my deare S. Augustin sayth , speaking in his wonted maner to thee ) do-●●e● smile vpon those that neither seek , o● desire any thing but thee . What cans● thou deny to such , as thus loue thee ? Verily thou seemest so enamoured of them , as if thou wert forgettfull of the infinitnes of thy Maiesty . The more they become humble , the more they are regarded by thee , and the more ( in thy light ) do they perceaue their vnworthines to be thus aduanced to loue thee , which the more short it is of that which in will they desir by more , and more humility to become before thee , the more they endea●our to become gratefull to thy infinit mercy . O who can expresse the ioy that an humble soule takes in being despised for thee ! Verily nothing doth she esteeme so great a burthen , as to be fauoured , honoured , esteemed , or applauded by men , whose opinion she feareth may deceaue her through her great frailty ! O how little is the opinion of men to be esteemed , seeing they are so ●●ekle , inconstant , and easily deceaued ! but thy iudgments , my Lord God , are true , and iustified in themselues ; be thou my witnes , and defender , who ●●nst not be deceaued ; and then lett all the world censure me as they please ; ☜ a good conscience is better then a thousand wittnesses ; giue me this then ; and I shall easily passe through all things ! Speak , my Lord , peace to my hart , that I may attend to thee alone my only beloued . Shall I after all thy benefits desir any thing beside thee ? O no , my God● farr , farr , farr be this misery from me , ☞ after my soul hath been thus vrged by thee to sigh , long , and thirst without ceasing after being vnited with thee .

THE FIFT CONFESSION .

TELL me , my Lord , I beseech thee , what can my soul pretend if it seek any thing with thee , which is an impediment to my truly louing thee ? What can I , I say , pretend , seeing no peace , or comfort can be found , but only in thee ? What do we when wee desire comfort of thee , but depriue our selues of a most happy liberty , which they enioy who desire nothing for tyme or eternity , ☞ but ( without al regard of themselues ) to be perfectly conformable to thee . If we would liue without all intention , or wish : but of enioying thee ( which cannot be done , but by a truly humble and faithfull soule ) the diuell could not ouercome vs by any wile . We should easily retain true peace with our selues , with all the world , and aboue all with thee . For when we adhere to any created thing we become a slaue to our Passion , and are in eminent danger of sinne . No way is plaine , secure , and easy , and without perill of all errour , but this , that the soul seek nothing but thee her Creator ; Esay . 35. 8. This is the way , in which a foole cannot erre ; this is the way without questions , in which a soul without all impediment adhereth to thee , the fountain of all true wisedome who willingly illuminateth our needy soules , if we wil but giue thee our hart , and soul to thy self ; thou considerest not our former sinnes , after thou hast once blotted them out , but dost vpon them ( who haue had the maners of beastes in times past ) most bountifully , and aboundantly bestow and refresh them with the sweet dew of thy grace , which hauing tasted in their soul , it maketh them loath all that is lesse then Thee ; neither can they take any content , but in hearing thy name , speaking to thee , and longing after thee , after tho● haft wounded their soul with thy Diuine Charity . O lett me sitt alone silent to all the world , and it to me , that● may learn the song of Loue , and praise o● thee , which is so infinitly due to thee from me ! This song none can sing but those that truly loue thee , and whose only consolation is to be without all com●ort as often , and as much as it shall please thee . Nothing as thou knowst , do I putt any ioy , or comfort in , but in sighing after thee , wh● a●t not heer ( as thou art ) to be by vs seen . O teach me those vertues , which draw a soul so out of her self into thee , that she becometh insensible to all things but thee ; these vertues are , true Humility which knoweth not how to exallt it self , perfect Subiection to thee , and Discretion which can only be taught by thy Maiesty , and yet is so necessary , that no vertue hath more vertue in it , then partaketh of true Discretion . For without that , we insteed of true vertue practise absurd follies ! O my Lord . aboue all things lett me seeke thy glorie , who be praised by all creatures for all eternity● Amen .

THE SIXT CONFESSION .

IS it any wonder , my Lord God that in all my doubts , temptations , paines , and in this continuall warrfare which I find vpon earth● and in my greif of being seperated by sinnes dayly vnwillingly committed , and liuing in flesh and bloud from thee my only beloued and my most infinit good , I recurre to thee for succour , & help ? What shall I do , if I should not in all things speak vnto thee , consult with thee , and haue relation to thee ? what would becom of me , whose frailty , and weaknes is aboue all that can be imagined , much lesse expressed by me ; but by recurring to thee I find , and gett light , and a certain sweet , and heauenly repast towards the sustaining of all the miseries this bannishment of ours is subiect vnto . Alas , thou knowst I haue placed all my peace and hope in thee ; All I desire is , that may loue thee , and become totally subiect to thee ; Do with me whatsoeuer thou pleasest . For I desire no more power to choose any thing any more , then if I had neuer been ; only thy-self I long for and desire to possesse , and obtaine ; yet in what maner , & measure as thou didst from all eternity will , and ordaine . For in this desire , my soul , hart , and will haue no limitts , nor can they sufficiently extend themselues to their fill , saue only by louing and praising thee by thy self ( which is my refuge ) all power in my self I feeling vtterly to faile . Certainly only by louing , knowing , and enioying thee can my soul become truly happy : bring me to this I beseech thee , seeing that thou vouchsafest such a desire to her who is thy poorest , sinnfullest and most contemptible creature : neither is there any creature , nor can there be , of so litle desert , but that they deserue what thou dost to and for my soule farr , farr , farr be●or me ; All the Glory therefor be giuen to thee . For nothing but confusion is due vnto me ; which grant I may beare patiently when through thy iust iudgment it falleth vpon me .

THE VII . CONFESSION .

I Haue inquired of others about all those things which I thought appertained , or might be a help to me for the better seruice of thee ; But no stability could I find in any Instructions till I was referred to thee , who art that one thing which is only necessary . ☜ Few are the Instructions which to a good will were necessary , if we were referred to thee , as our principall , and only Maister , and Director , who can indeed neuer erre , and is allways present , and both teaches vs what Obedience , and Humility is , and giueth grace allso to perf●rm them , which none can do but thy-self . O how happy are they who truly adore thee in truth , and Spirit ! For these in thy light shall see light , and in thy strength are able to passe through all difficulties , how great soeuer . These adhering faithfully to thee , sustaine their Crosses so cheerfully , as if in their suffering they beheld thee for whom they suffer , with their corporall eyes . And they desyring no knowledg of thee but what they haue by faith ( which is only secure , ☞ and void of all perill of errour ) Thou wonderfully confirmest them in the light of that which is in it-selfe so secure . What comfort can a soul take in any created thing , who hath placed her ioy in thee alone ? No Angell can satisfy her , or make her grei●e the lesser , while she is bannished from her God , who is her Glory , and her Crowne . Yet one thing she hath to be some comfort to her while thus it stands with her , which none can take from her ; ☞ and that is the hauing of relation vpon all occurrents to thee immediatly in her soul , in such a maner that nothing can interpose it selfe betweene thee , and her . She indeed highly esteemeth all that thou hast made ; euery thing as it is deriued by partaking of thy grace ; More in perfection of which degree , are Angells and the Soules of men , and she preferreth the latter ( that are yet in this world ) before herself in all things : but yet as in comparison of thee , they are to her , as if they were meere nothing , as for resting or placing her felicity in them . For well she knoweth that if there were no soul yet created , nor euer to be , but only her own soul , and that ●ere ( as all soules are ) capable of thee , she should by possessing thee alone , and without them be infinitly happy ; for thus it is ; for nothing can ●atiat a reasonable soul , but only thou ; And hauing of thee , who art indeed all , nothing could be said to be ●anting to her . Thus my God it stands with me ; for which all glory and praise be giuen to thee eternally . For if it had not stood thus with our soules , that our happynes had only depended on thee , some defect there would haue beene , that might haue been an impediment between a soul and thee . O that some who liue wholy to thee , and experience the infinit desire thou hast to impart thy self● to all reasonable soules , would come out of their solitud , & their liuing wholy ●or the good of themselues , & declare the way of Loue to hungry , and euen starued soules ! O how many would then be as tractable Lambes , who now rebell as stiffe-necked soules ! Fa. ●●er . Verily thou knowest that before I mett with such a seruant of th●e my hart seemed ●o me and also to others , to be growne ( liuing yet in Religion more hard as to any good , then euer was a stone ; but heating thy law made by him so easy , & plaine , it was great ioy to my soul , and little did it seeme to suffer all the paine , and misery in the world , so I might please and serue thee my only beloued . I had indeed inquired about thee of many before , and those such as were most likely to haue known ; they all agreed in points necessary to saluation , neither should I haue erred as I did , if I had followed them ; but what was the meane , and way to a perfect Vnion with thee in my soul , I could not at all hear , or learn . For they had ( as some of them humbly profest ) been for twenty yeares imployed in hearing Confessions ; and in studies , thereby endeauouring to thy great honour to work the saluation of streying soules , which was a happy course for them , so that they had little experience in directing Contemplatiue soules ; But as one of them profest , who was our cheife Superior , V. R. F. Rudesind Barlo . if we had not found one of our owne Order , who could in this haue giuen satisfaction to our soules , he would haue sought ouer all the world most willingly to haue found , and procured one for vs ; for which Humility , and Charity of his , I beseech thee my Lord God to reward him as beseemeth thy infinit Goodnes And grant that we , who haue , or shall find benefit by these most happy Instructions , may be as faithfull to thee , as it is possible for soules loaden with flesh , and bloud ; and lett our harts study nothing ells , but how to loue th●e ; and by perfect subiection lett our soules liue quietly vnder whomsoeuer is sett ouer vs by thee . For in vain do we pretend to obey thee , ☞ if we be not pliable to those that are set ouer vs by thy Diuine Maiesty . For those who truly endeauour to please thee would obey a worm , if it could commaund in the name , ☞ and power of thee . For so much is an action pleasing to thee , as it is done in that maner it is exacted of vs by thee ; which good will , and pleasure of thine we cannot learn but by conuersing with thee , which if we do , and liue withall as well as our frailty will permit , wholy to thee , and seek our own abiection , it will easily appeare to vs how , and which way in all things we shall behaue our selues to become truly obedient to thee . For either by the Rule , custome , or order of the howse , or by the speciall ordinance of the Superior God sheweth vs what to do , ☜ they being infallible declarations of his will , and the most certain of all ; Or ells for things for ●hich they referre vs to thee , as for the maner of our Prayer , and such like things , thou teachest an humble soul what therein to do , and when to ask of others , and when to seek the solutions from thee ; But indeed as I haue confessed to thee before , speaking ordinarily , few are the questions that occurre in the way that is of humble Resignation ; ☜ Only thou requirest , that how cleerly , or securely soeuer a soul walk , she be ready in all that is required of her by Superiors , to giue them a faithfull accompt , and to amend , and correct whatsoeuer they iudge amisse ; This lesson they learn who in all haue relation to thee , and thou giuest them grace to obey in all for thee , if we dispose our soules to hear , and follow thee . For thou giuest one grace to one , and an other to an other , and some may do that with profit , which would to another be a mayn preiudice . Thou giuest wisedom to all thy little ones , but not to all in one maner , but to a Superior in one kind , and to a subiect in another . In all therefor if we will truly obey , we ought to obserue ourselues , what doth hinder , and what doth help towards the obtaining of thy diuine Loue , for which all things are and haue been ordained by thy diuine Goodnes ; and yet to do this as we ought , passeth so between thee , and vs : that none can discern it by vs , ☞ vnlesse perhaps they hold the same course . For this proceeding doth not make a soul singular in her actions , and cariadge ( for singularity is a vice which thou extreamly hatest ) but rather makes one exceedingly loue the common obediences , and externall exercises , all of them putting ones soul in mind of her duty towards thee in all things ; and so hast thou ordained , and disposed the orders of this howse , that they are a sufficient book ●o teach vs our duty , ☜ and do shew vs when to Praise thee , and when to cease from actually doing it ; When to speak , and when to be silent ; and for my part following them as well as I can , quietly , and out of Obedience to thee , I find them all most necessary , and proper to aduance a soul in the true Loue of thee ; and particularly the Diuine Off●ce is such a heauenly thing , that in it we find whatsoeuer we can desire . For sometimes in it we addresse vs to thee for help , and pardon for our sinnes ; and some-times thou speakest to vs ; so that it pearceth , and woundeth with desire of thee , the very bottome of our soules , and sometimes thou teachest a soul to vnderstand more in it of the knowledg of thee , and of themselues , then euer could haue been by all the teaching in the world , ☜ shewed to a soul in fiue hundred yeares ; and as I haue often allready said thy words are works ; and therefor happy are the humble , and peacefull of hart ; for these find such free accesse to thee , that thou be commest indeed all in all and aboue all to them , while they seel● nothing but thee ; and no perill is there to them in their way , as long 〈◊〉 they retain true Humility in the●● soules . For who can hurt a soul , 〈◊〉 deceaue her , while she adhereth faithfully to thee ? but if she presume any thing of herself , what perills● and danger she is subiect vnto , and she apt to fall into , none can conceaue , much lesse expresse . And to this effect of shewing a soul how to walk securely , writeth thy great seruant the Author of the following of Christ in his 21. Chapter of his third book , whose words with great ioy I read , and before thee speaking too , I will heere bring them in ; beseeching thee to instruct me in the true practise of them . For they contayn the way in which a foole cannot erre , and without the practise of this , our soules lye open to all the snares of the Diuell : thine , and our enemy ; No instruction did she so much regard , so frequently reflect●on , or more volue , and ●●●olve in her mind , nor more delighted in , ●hen this that followeth , being meerly of ●er own finding , and obs●ruing in the said ●ook ; which she was familiar in ; and no ●aruaile , considering the excellency , and ●ecessity of it for the purpose which she hath mentioned , being the securing of one in a Spirituall course , thus therefor doth he say ●peaking to her soule .

Super omnia , & in omnibus requiesces ●●ima mea in Domino semper : quia ipse est ●anctorum aeterna requies . Da mihi dul●s●me & amantissime Iesu , in Te super ●mnem Salutem & Pulchritudinem , super omnem Gloriam & honorem , super omnem ●●tentiam & Dignitatē , super omnem Sciētiam & Subtilitatem , super omnes Diuitias & Artes , super omnem Laetitiā & Exultationem , superomnem famam & Laudem , super omnem Suauitatem & Consolationē , super omnem Spem & Promissionem , super omne Meritum & Desiderium , super omnia dona & munera , quae potes dare & infundere , super omne Gaudium & iubilationem , quam potest mens capere & ●●ntire : Denique super Angelos & Archangelos : super omnem Exercitum Coeli , & super omnia visibilia , & inuisibilia , & super omne quod Tu D●us meus non es● Quia Tu Domine Deus meus , super omnia optimus es , Tu solus Altissimus , Tu solus Potentissimus , Tu solus Sufficientissimus & Plenissimus , Tu solus Suauissimus & Solatiosissimus , Tu solus Pulcherrimus & Amantissimus : Tu solus Nobilissimus & Gloriosissimus super omnia , in quo cunct●● bona simul perfecte sunt , & semper fu●runt , & erunt . Atque ideo minus est & ins●ffici●ns , qui●quid pr●ter Teipsum mihi donas , aut de teipso reuelas vel promitt●● Te non viso , nec plene adepto . Quoniam quidem non potest cor meum veraciter requiescere , nec totaliter contentari , nisiin Te requies●at , & omnia dona , omnemque Creaturam transcendat .

Aboue all things , & in all things my soule thou shalt euer rest in God , for hee is the eternall rest of the Saints . Grante Mee most sweet , and louing Iesus to Rest in Thee aboue all Creatures ; aboue all Health , and Beauty , aboue all Glory , and Honour ; aboue all I owre , and Dignity ; aboue all Knowledge , and Subtility ; aboue all riches , and Arts ; Aboue all ioy , and ●ladnesse ; aboue all fame , and Praise ; ●boue all sweetnesse , and Comfort ; aboue ●ll Hope , and Prom●se , aboue all meritt , ●nd Desyre ; aboue all Guifts , and prefents ●hat Thou canst giue , and impart ; aboue all ioy , and Iubilee that the Mind can re●eiue , & feele : lastly aboue Angells , and Archangells , aboue all the heauenly Host , aboue all things visible , and inuisible ; and aboue All that Thou art not my God .

For Thou my Lord God art good aboue all goods , Thou alone most high ; Thou alone ●ost powrefull ; Thou alone most full , and sufficient ; Thou alone most sweet , and comfortable ; thou alone most beautifull , and louing , Thou alone most noble , and Glorious aboue all Things , in whom all ●oods together are most perfectly , haue beene , and euer shall be . And therefore it 〈◊〉 too little , and not sufficient whatsoeuer Thou bestowest on Mee besides thy selfe , or reuealest of t●y selfe , or promisest , whilst Thou art not seene , nor fully obtayned . For surely my Hart cannot rest , nor be fully contented vnlesse itt rest in Thee , and transcend all guifts , and Creatures whatsoeuer . All things , desires , and loues are vain● But only that which tends To God alone our cheifest good , And all things ells transcends . My soul therefor by this sweet Loue shall day , and night aspire , And rest in God ( all things aboue ) My Loue , and lifes desire . And while I liue , I le neuer cease To languish for his Loue , Breathing , and sighing after him , Till he my life remoue . For since ● am not where I loue , How can I comfort find , But only in the song of Loue By Loue to me assign'd ? And where so ere ●his word is 〈◊〉 loue It yeilds a siluer sound ; But if that word I misse in it Me thinks I want my ground . Nothing so simple can be pennd If it but treat of Loue , But that it serueth in some sort My sadnes to remoue . And shall my soul by senselesse loue , Which yet is neuer true , Bestow more loue where it is lost , Then where 't is only due ? ● no my God , but rather lett Such folly be to me A meanes to vrge my sinnefull soul To Loue more fernently ! And henceforth lett me draw no breath , But to aspire by Loue To thee my God , and all my good By whom I liue and moue . No Stagge in chace so thirsty is , Or greedy of sweet spring , As is my soul of thee my God While I heere sighing sing . My soul where is thy Loue , and Lord , Since him thou canst not find ? O cheere vp hart , be comforted , For he is in thy mind ! To him relation thou maist haue , As often as thou goes Unto the closett of thy hart , Thy griefs for to disclose . As silly Lambes from rauening Woolues For help to Sheapheards fly , So shall my soul in euery case For help , and councell hye , To thee my God by humble Prayer , In hope , and confidence , That thou my Lord willt succour me , And be my soules defence . And seeing that my God is rich How can I say , I 'm poore ? And hee more myne , then I myne owne : What can I wish for I more ? And in his Maiesty , and power , Much more I will reioice , Th●n if of all in heauen , and earth I had commaund , and choice . My God one thing alone thou know'st I feare and apprehend , Which is my Lord for to displease , Whose mercies haue no end . From all that doth displease thyne eye●● Be pleas'd to sett me free , For nothing ells in heauen , or earth , Do I d●sire but thee . And lett me rather death embrace , Then thee my God offend , Or in my hart to giue thy place To any other freind . Nothing would greiue my soul so much , As in me to perceaue Any affection in the world That thine would me bereaue . I know thou must possesse alone , Or els we are not thine , In such good plight as we should be , If light to vs did shine , As thou desirest it should do By grace our soules within ; For which are all the helps we haue Intended , and haue been Imparted , and bestowed by thee , That we might liue alone To thee who satiat'st pure soules With ioyes that are vnknown . And wo to them a thousand times , Who interest haue in any , ☜ Or haue deuided harts to thee , After thy gifts so many . For thou hast purchased our loue At too too deare a rate , To haue a partner in our hart , Which iustly thou dost hate . O this thy wrong makes Angells blush O make it farre from me Since that I am both body and soul All conseerate to thee ! And I also will greiue with them , To see thee haue such wrong From soules selected by thy self To sing with them the song Of Loue , and praise to thee , O God , And euen in this place To Contemplate thee , as we may , O sweet and happy grace ! If we would dy vnto our selues And all things ells but thee , It would be naturall to our soules For to ascend , and be Vnited to our Center deare , To which our soules would hy , Being as proper then to vs , As fire to vpwards fly . O lett vs therefor loue my God , For Loue pertaines to him , And lett our soules seek nothing ells , But in this Loue to swimme , Till we absorpt by his sweet Loue Return from whom we came , Where we shall melt into that Loue , Which ioyeth me to name . And neuer can I it too much Speak of , or it desire , Since that my God , who 's Loue it selfe , Doth only Loue require . Come therefor all , and lett vs loue And with a pure aspect , Regard our God in all we do , And he will vs protect . O that all things vpon the earth , Re-ecchoed with thy praise My euerlasting glorious God , The Ancient of dayes ! And it I wish with all my soul Incessantly to sing ; But seeing this I cannot do , My sighes to heauen shall ring ; Yea if I writ out all the sea , Yet could I not expresse The ioy , and comfort I do feele In what thou dost possesse . No gifts , or grace , nor comforts heere How great so ere they be , Can satiat my longing soul , While I possesse not thee . For thou art all my harts desire , Yea all that I do craue , In earth , or heauen now , and euer Thou art all that I would haue . And I do wish with all my soul , That to thee I could pray , With all my hart , and all my strength Ten thowsand times a day . Lett peoples , tribes , and tongues confesse Vnto thy Maiesty ; And lett vs neuer cease to sing Sanctus , Sanctus to thee . These are his words my Lord God , which whosoeuer practiseth , shall find a Spirituall internall life so easy , sweet , secure , and void of all questions , ☞ that they will walk ( euen in this bannishment , where our life is tearmed , and that most iustly , a continuall warrefare ) with a heauenly peace , ●ob . 7. 1. and security . For to that soul who proposeth nothing to herself but thy selfe alone , aboue all gifts , and creatures , what can interpose it selfe for to harm her , while she remaineth thus confident , and humble between Maiesty● and her soul. Certainly so subiect doth such an one liue to thee , and to all others in that maner , as shall be exacted by thee , that there can nothing carry her away , while thus it stands with her , to any errour of vanity ; and her loue is so founded in true Charity , and practised with such Humility , and so in her very soul , that nothing can interrupt her conuersation with thee ; Besides in a soul who walketh vpon this secure ground of only seeking thee , and only resting in thee , such a diuine light doth shine , that she iudgeth according to the iustice of thy Diuine will , and not according to sense , or custome , which in these blind days takes place allmost in all things of true reason ; and this for want of hauing recourse to thee , my Lord , who art the only true light ; and of this defect it proceeds , that the diuine ways of Loue are now held so perillous , and insecure , ☜ in which my God thou hast an infinit wrong , seeing that we were made only to Loue , and attend to the praise of thee , our Lord . It is true , those who will pretend to lead a Spiri●uall life , and yet seek not in all to deny themselues , but desire this gift , or this grace , this fauour , or that comfort , lett them pretend for their excuse in it whatsoeuer they please , do o●ten times miserably deceiue , not only themselues , but also many others , and bring an internal life wholy into a scorne , and contempt to the preiudice of their owne soules , and also of many others . But I wish that those that do this simply by being for a Spirituall life vnapt , might giue themselues to that which by Superiors should be found most fitting for them , ☞ and no● be a cause that thy sweet mercy , an● goodnes should haue such wrong as that other soules who were fit should be hindred from hauing relation to thee , by which their soules would be turned wholy into Loue , by a vehement desire , and longing after thee , that one thing that is only necessary ; and from this house .

( To witt of the Benedictine Nunn● 〈◊〉 Cambray . The same she meanes for Pa●●● issued thence , and where her natural Sister of the same Spirit Gouernes at present . ) I beseech thee for thy own sake , keepe this misery , which of all other is the greatest that I can comprehend o● imagin .

THE EIGTH CONFESSION .

BLESSED is that Simplicity ( saith my foremencioned Author in his fourth book of the Following of Christ ) that forsaketh the difficullt way of many questions . Those are his words in his said diuine Booke , where he proueth the way of Loue to be so easy , and secure , as I haue before signified . O how happy are they who follow thee in Humility , and Simplicity of hart ! for these haue few doubts which are the cause of questions . The more a soul is void of doubts , the more capable is she ( speaking ordinarily ) of these secret wayes of the Diuine Loue For commonly her way must be to resign herself to thy will . What roome is there left then for questions ? Yet when it is thy will , that in a reall doubt she ask , thou teachest her how to proceed in it , that it may be a help to her soul , and no hindrance , which seldome happens when without thy leaue , and sending she presumeth to endanger herself to be intangled by falling out of one doubt , and question into fiue hundred others . Lett it be with my soul , Kings 1. 19. O Lord , as it is said of Anna the Mother of thy Prophet Samuel , that she turned her countenance no more towards seuerall waies . For hauing been taught , and instructed by thy sweet mercy , that One thing is to me only necessary , lett me not loose my selfe by following , or trying those seuerall waies of which she speaketh . I haue as thou knowst , my God , had sufficient triall of them , to the great misery , and difficulty of my poore soul for that time ; lett me now sing , and that from the bottom of my soul , Psal. 72.28 Psal. 7● . 25 . that it is good for me to adhere to my God , besides whom what is to me in heauen , or what desire I on earth ? Only thy selfe my Lord is desired by me , and only thou canst comfort and satisfy me . It becometh me to become wholy subiect to thee , so that for time , and eternity , thou maist dispose of me as it pleases thee , which with my whole soul I beseech thee to do , and then I ●hall be as happy as I desire to be . Thou knowst that since I was taught what it was to loue thee , I neuer durst wish , or desire any thing . For it appeareth plaine to me , that my blindnes , and ignorance is so great , that euen in the desire of that which in it self is good , I may be extreamly deceiued . Only thy-selfe knoweth what is most to thy honour , and best for me ; and therefor whatsoeuer thou dost , shall be best welcome to me . I desire no liberty to choose any thing besides thee , because it suffiseth me if thou wilt become all in all , and aboue all to me ; which desire . I know is pleasing to thee , and therefor I beseech thee inlardg my hart , and soulin this longing , and sighing after thee my only beloued . Lett my hart be free to thee . For none deserues any part therein besids thee . O how great a greif would it be to me , if any c●●ated thing should be an impediment to my being wholy thine ! Verily if I should find , that my will were false to thee by desiring any thing but thee , nothing in heauen , or earth could comfort me , while thus it stood between my hart , and thee . Giue me therefor grace to be faithfull to thee , who hath shewed such an infinit mercy towards me , as to lett me know of the way of Loue , whereby all Crosses become tolerable to me . Neuer shall I be satisfied with blessing thee , and thanking thee for this thy Mercy . All , that loue thee , praise thee for me , who am not worthy to name thee . Verily if I be now vngratfull to thee , it is pitty thy earth should beare me . Yet thou knowst my extreame frailty , and therefor in all haue mercy on me , and in the end saue me who putt all my hope in thee . What shall I render for this thy infinit benefit bestowed on me ? Verily if I should be despised by all the world , as I iustly deserue to be , and should haue , and feele the paines of all that euer haue suffered for thee , and should be shutt vp in a place which were only big inough to containe me , and were ( as vnworthy of them , as indeed I beleiue , and acknowledg my selfe to be ) debarred of the Sacraments , ☜ by which such grace to soules , is so aboūdantly imparted by thee , and were held for a reprobate by all that are most esteemed , and respected by me , yet this were little to endure in requitall of this benefit which I haue heere recounted before thee , and which I read with so much ioy , that it is a solace to me in those difficulties which are only known to thee , and which would , if I were not exceedingly holpen by thee , quite ouerwhelme me for as it is well known to thee , they do oftentimes make all my strength decay so that I seem to be left without so much as is sufficient to go euen about the house ; But when I haue been thus dealt with by thee , I haue been withall enabled more feruently to praise thee ; And thy intention by it was apparant to me . For by it thou didst so abate pride that was most strong in me , that all I could haue done , or deuised , or all other creatures with me , could not so much in many yeares haue humbled me , and haue bread such a contempt in my soul of resting , or taking delight in any thing which was lesse then thee . Thus , my God , thou dealest with me , who , as I haue often said , am not worthy to name thy Maiesty ; and I see , if we will but giue our selues wholy to the seeking after thee , and dispose our selues to suffer whatsoeuer it shall please thee , we shall not need to take care for any thing , but how to please , and praise thee . ☞ For thou willt prouide Crosses such , and so much as will be sufficient to make v● becom that , thou wouldst ●aue vs to be ; and in those of thy sending there is no danger , if we will endeauour to be faithfull to thee , and in them call often vpon thee . But when we place such perfection in suffering , that we think we do nothing vnlesse we be in matters of suffring , and are as it were loath to loose time ( as we think we do ) by being without occasion of suffering , ☜ we oftentimes faile in those Crosses which ●e in such an humor do lay vpon our selues or thrust our selues into without thy leaue , and disable vs from vndergoing , and suffering those which then , or afterwards are by thee thought to be fitter for vs ; and we seeing our selues to faile in these of our own vndertaking , which we made our selues sure to be able to stand vnto , grow to be deiected , yea sometimes euen so farr as to mistrust all the course we had held before . For we remembring we endured greater matters before , ( being of Gods sending , and through his grace ) presumed now allso of that strength which then we had , which was not , as we conceiued , ours , but our Lords , who rewardeth no works but his owne . If we will therefor in all liue secure , lett vs desire nothing , no not euen to haue matter of suffering , saue so farr , as it shall be his pleasure . For certain●ly to suffer for him is so great an honour , that one may iustly esteem herself vnworthy thereof ; and yet it is a thing so necessary to aduance vs in the way of Loue , that we need not doubt but God will prouide it when he sees it fitt ; and when he doth send it , come it which way it will , it will be no impediment to a faithfull soule ; but her only way , in this as well as all other things , for to liue secure , is , to be as a little child by humble Resignation , ☞ and lett God do with vs in all what he will . For only by this meanes we can liue in Peace , & auoid the snares of selfe loue , and the diuell . For a soul that is apt to esteem greatly of a little suffering , and thinketh when she hath in it a slight occasion , that it layeth open the way to great matters between God , and her soul , God vseth to lead her by another way , till she see , and acknowledge her errour ; and many times she falleth into sinn , and imperfection by her greedines to aduance her soul by vntimely suffering , which at last maketh her cry out to thee ; O Lord ; how great is my blindnes , and frailty ? help me therefor my God in all these miseries , which heere thy sinnefull seruant speaketh of as a guilty person to thee ; Great , great is my folly , and frailty , and therefor for help , and strength I fly vnto thee ; spare my soul sinning before thee , and lett me now begin to loue only thee ; help me in all , my Lord for vaine is the help of man . Psal. 59. 13. I will therefor confide in thee my God , my mercy , who be Adored , Praised , and Exalted , for tyme and eternity . Amen .

THE NINTH CONFESSION .

LEX Domini immaculata conuertens animas ; Psal. 18. 8. 9. testimonium Domini fidele sapientiam praestans paruulis ; Iustitiae Domini rectae laerificantes corda ; praeceptum Domini lucidum illuminans oculos . The Law of our Lord is immaculate , correcting soules , the Testimony of our Lord is faithfull , giuing Wisedome to little Ones . The Iustices of our Lord be right , making harts ioyfull : the precept of our Lord light some illuminating the eyes . These my God are the words of thy Royall Prophet , which are ( as it followeth in the same Psalme ) to be desired aboue gold , and rich pretious stones ; yea they are more sweet to a louing soul then the honny , or the honny combe . Lett this Law of thine conuert my soul , that it may become one of thy little ones to whom the grace of true Wisedome is o●ten promised by thee . Lett thy Iustice make my hart ioyfull . For in the per●ormance thereof is true Peace only to be found They that liue according to this thy Iustice , do enioy such a diuìne tranquillity , that it cannot be expressed by any pen whatsoeuer . None can walk in this path of true Iustice ( in perfection ) but the humble . Those find out in thy light what is thy best will , and pleasure in all things as farr as humane flesh will admitt , and perform thy iust will , as well as human frailty will reach . When we do perform any thing by this iust rule of thy holy will , we find an admirable effect the●eof in our soul. This is that which by performing in all things we become truly subiect to thee , and haue the merit of Obedience , which maketh all our actions so noble before thee ; and of which vertue of Obedience how much , ☜ or how little our actions partake , so much , and no more do they deserue reward . Worthyly may Obedience be preferred before Sacrifice . For it is that which gouerneth heauen , and earth , and which only deserueth reward in thy sight . Happy are they who walk this way . For they haue a ●ast euen of the ioyes of heauen . For as they there obey thy will , so these thy humble soules do also endeauour to do the same . This Obedience to thee maketh the Angells as ●ell content with their degree of Glory , as to be of the Seraphins , who are yet in a farr higher degree in thy Kingdome . This maketh the Saints content with theirs ; this maketh soules on earth who aspire to thee with all their harts , to limit their desires with thy good will , and pleasure , and by this meanes they desire neither life , nor death ; but in it conforme themselues to thy most iust will ; this maketh them desyre disgrace , nor Glory neither paine nor health , neither Crosses , nor comforts . This Obedience to thee , and to Superiors for thee , made some soules pleasing to thee by liuing in the wildernes , and others by liuing in a Community , some by liuing to the profit of their neighbour , and others by liuing , and attending only to thee in their soules , some by liuing in high , and eminent degree , and hauing commaund ouer many others , and some by being esteemed abiect , and the very scumme of the world ; and these if they had of their own choice , and election chosen the contrary state , would neuer haue arriued to true Sanctity : Some also by many paines , & Crosses come to thee , & some only by an internall affection to thee , hauing that in affection which others suffer in act , they also are respected by thee ; By which it appeares how great a subiection is exacted by thee of those who desire to become vnited to thee , and neuer can we prosper in a Spirituall life vnlesse we hearken to thee , and obserue euen in the least things , what thou wouldst haue vs do , and go that way thou wouldst haue vs in all things whatsoeuer . For we may be sure thou willt lead vs by the way of Abnegation which is the way of the Crosse which if we will walk with humility , and simplicity , we shall with security arriue at the port of eternall Glory , and enioy thee our only beloued in that degree thou hadst ordained for vs from all eternity , liue we long , or dy we soone . For only in thee can we be happy , and by thy meere grace can we deserue to enioy thee . What we ouercome is so done in thy strength that the glory is wholy due to thee alone ; and this I find dayly , seeing that when I presume of my own strength , though it be in a thing which I haue often ouercome , and many times farr greater it seemes to me , yet I faile in that , euen often to the offending thee my Lord in an extraordinary maner . From this errour therefor my God heerafter deliuer thy poore contemptible seruant , that I may prais● thee who art my only strength , and hope● Lead me which way thou willt , so●● may blesse thee in all , and rest in thee aboue all . From thee the strong receaue their strength , and in thee sinners that haue nothing of our owne haue wherewith to supply all our want ; thou flyest vp with them who by an ardent loue haue surmounted all created things , and are firmely vnited to thee in Spirit ; and thou also lendest thy sweet hand to thy little , and imperfect ones who are of a good will , to help them out of the mire , and durt of passions , and inordinate affections ; In this mercy my soul doth hope , and reioice , and I do in my pouerty congratulate the perfections of others , beseeching thee to make me partaker of their merits ; And aboue all out of the aboundance of thy owne store , giue me where●ith to retorn to thee for all the mer●ies thou hast shewed to my sinnefull ●oul . Lett me please thee , and praise ●hee , and desire no more but that thou do with me whatsoeuer thou knowst most to thy honour . O that soules would conuert their hart wholy to thee the most desirable beawty , Psal. 144.9 . to whom if we compare all that is fair which thou hast made , they will seeme ●o be without all beawty , and light ! O if by humility soules would dispose themselues for the Diuine Loue , what a reformation would there quickly be in the whole world ? When I remember how many soules seperate themselues by sinfull sinning from thee , Psal. 33. 6. it pearceth my very soul , seeing they forsak him , who is an infinit good and a most amiable beawty . Remember , O Lord , for thy own sake our extreame frailty , and giue gra●e that we may all conuert , and return by Loue to thy Diuine Maiesty , whose mercies are aboue all thy works ; for which Glory be euer to thee by all for time , and eternity . Amen .

THE X. CONFESSION .

ACCEDITE ad Deum , & illuminamini , & facies vestrae non confundentur . Come to Him , and be illuminated ; and your faces shall not be confounded . These words in our diuine Office are spoken not only by him , who by thy owne testimony was a man according to thy owne hart , but proceeded from the holy Ghost , the Spirit of all truth , who speaketh by the Prophets and Apostles for the comfort , instruction , and illumination of such as are true members of our holy Mother the Church , how weak , and contemptible soeuer they be ; In the beleif of which Church , and in hope of thy mercies , which I haue always experienced to be great towards me thy poore seruant , I fly to thee in all my doubts , and obscurities , which sinne , ignorance , and imperfection cause to my soul in her way ●owards thee her only desired Beloued ; ●he , by whom thou speak this , had ●●cepted any , I should not haue da●d to haue applyed it to my selfe ; ●ut as it is , I should do thee wrong , ●o fly from thee , when thou bidst me ●●me , and be illuminated ; Though my ●●nnes be great , yet thy mercies ex●eed all the sinnes in the world ; I ●ill therefor come to thee , that my ●●ce be not confounded ; I will approach ●o thee the only true light , that my sou●● may Loue thee , being guided by ●his thy light . In this light the glorious 〈◊〉 . Augustin walked in an extraordi●ary maner , when he cried out with ● most amorous hart ; Lord lett me know ●hee , and lett me know my-selfe . These ●wo knowledges are inseparable ●ompanions , and increase the one ●y the other . For who can know thee●nlesse ●nlesse he know himself , vnlesse he ●e taught by thee ? Those that would ●now some thing of thee , and would be fauoured by thee , for any end but to loue thee , and to learn to dispise themselues be in perill of a most dangerous ruine . For those that walk the true way of the Crosse , desire n● fauour but to be able without a● comfort to be faithfull to thee m● Lord God . Those that haue done th● contrary ( of which alas there hau● not been a few ) are they which hau● brought a Spirituall life into such contempt , that they shall haue in ● maner all the world about their eare● to censure them who enter into it one obiecting , it will put one out o● his wits , as they haue found by experience in many that venture● vpon such a course ; Others say ; Those that affect singular waies of Spirit are in eminent perill of being deluded by the diuell ; Others pretend that those ( poore soules ) pretend such perfection , that they slight , and contemne the courses of others , though their Superiors , and betters , which is an euident signe , that they are for all their pretence in a great errour . Others obiect that they abstract their affections from all the world , and indeed would seeme to be dead to all creatures , but that this they do , that they may the better loue themselues ; and while they seek themselues in a Spirituall maner in the gifts , and graces of God , they say they are in more danger then those that liue in sinne , and wickednes . Others alleadg , that the quietnes they seeme to enioy in occurring accidents of difficulty , is either natural , or els becaus they pretending to lead forsooth a Spirituall life are bound in honour to endure them patiently , least otherwise they be prooued to their disgrace to be but in an imaginary course , which a Spiritual life in these dayes is generally held to be . Thus , and in infinit other maners , as it is known to thee , I haue in some sort experienced , euen from them , whom I could haue expected by the place they ●ear , to haue been hartned in my desyre of tending to thee to the vttermost ability of my soul ; but well might they do it , seeing they were also in place , where they were bound to reform in me what was , and is amis in my life , which I must confesse is very much , but yet I confide in thy help . But in fine the obiections against an internall life are so many , that much help is necessary for a soul that shall be able to hold , and go through with all obiections , and difficulties in that kind . For one saies ; for want of this circumstance , all their life is in perill ; and another saith , that the said circumstance may stand with a true Spirituall life ; but yet that there is another matter , or circumstance which were necessary to be reformed in their course ; and thus in their exceptions there be so many mindes , as men ; and yet none of them can say , there is any sinne in that which they alleadg for such a mayn impediment , the fault being indeed only that it is not sutable to their apprehension , and experience in spiritual matters . Thus therefor it stands with soules that in these days would lead a Spirituall life ; But those who place all their hope in thee my God , shall remain stable as a rock , and in thee who art their strength , and refuge they liue peaceable , and content , hauing the testimony of their conscience to b● their comfort amidst all oppositions , and contradictions . But aboue all obiections which I haue heard , that goes neerest my hart , is when I read , or hear , that it is perillous to walk the way of Loue , ☜ and that ( as some would seeme to proue ) no soul in any other course , or state is in such perill , as is a soul who giueth herself to thi● study ; But lett them affirm that who will . For my part I will shutt my eares from harkning to such men ; becaus nothing is more plaine , more easy , more secure , more pleasant then the way of Loue . For that way of Loue it cannot be called , if the soul seek in it any thing but thee alone , which these men would make it allmost impossible for one to do . But thou knowst ( my God ) that in this thou hast wrong . For it being thy own desire that soules should loue thee , and thou hauing made them only for that end that they might wholy attend , euen in this life , to the Loue , and Praise of thee alone ; how can this way be dangerous , where the only endeauour of the soul is that thy will be in al fullfilled ? who can doubt of thy assistance , and help therein , though we be able to do nothing of our selues ? Verily it cannot be doubted any more then it can be feared , that thou willt cease to be good to thy creatures which thou hast redeemed with thy pretious bloud . Lett not soules therefor I beseech thee by any such frights be brought into fear of walking this noble , and amiable way ; but lett vs sing in hope ; Psal. ●6 . 1. Dominus illuminatio mea , & salus mea , quem timebo ? Si Deus pro nobis , quis contra nos . My Lord is my light , and my Saluation whom shall I feare ? If God be with vs , what matter is it who is against vs . Lett vs proceed humbly , till we be admitted to enioy thee the God of Gods in Sion , where thy praise shall be perfected in vs . These things therefor remembring , and recounting before thee , do strengthen my soul , that it fall not from the stedfastnes , which is grounded , and founded vpon thee ; To harten , and inconradg my soul by speaking , and writing thus to thee , was the caus why these things haue been written by me , which I read , when I cannot ( for some indisposition in body or mind ) otherwise think vpon thee ; and when I am ouerwhelmed in any misery , it becometh most tolerable by hauing thus conference with thee , who neuer disdainest me ; for which all Glory be giuen to thee , who art my Lord , and my God blessed for all eternity . Amen Alleluia .

THE XI . CONFESSION .

O My Lord , to whom I will speak , and before whom my hart shall not be silent , while thus it stands with me , least the heauy weight of sinnes and my disordered passions do oppresse my soul , and seperate it from thee , the only desire , and beloued of my hart . It behooueth me indeed to be silent , and that all created things be likwise silent to me , to the end ● may hear the sweet whispering of thy voi●● , and attend in most quiet repose of soul to thy Diuine Maiesty , speaking to my hart . But this must be when my soul is drawn , and sweetly attracted by thee to attend to what it shall please thee to work in me . But now in these my sinnes which passions , and inordinat affections caus in me ; My soul doth cry out in the bottom thereof , and call vpon thee who art my refuge , helper , and deliuerer in all these my afflictions , and miseries ; and this my prayer is not reiected by thee , becaus thou art a bottome less Sea of mercy . O when shall my soul see all impediments remoued , that it may be vnited to thee , and retorn to thee , from whom it had her being , to this end , that it might by pure Loue become capable of enioying thee for all eternity ! What are all things to me without thee ? Verily nothing but a shadow , neither can any of them , no nor all of them together satisfy , or comfort me . By Louing , Pleasing , and Praising thee , as thou wouldst haue me , shall I become truly content , and happy , and by no gifts , or graces , or fauours besids , how great soeuer they be . Return , ret●rn my soul to him that only can satiat thee , and without whom all things , as thou seest , are most bitter and vnpleasing to thee . Only by Humility , and Obedience , can this be accomplished in thee . Humble , despise , and subiect thy self in all without exceptions , that he may take pitty on thee . Indeed , my Lord , I desire thus to become for thee , For I may truly say ; Psal. 72. 23. I was brought to nothing , and I knew it not ; and I am as a beast before thee ; and yet allso I may say , Psal. 72. that I am allways with thee , and thou with me by thy preuenting mercy . It is a poore way ●o think to become honourable by standing vpon our points ; and yet this is that which now is most in practise in these dayes . O how far is this from the practise of thy Saints , and seruants , who thought it their greatest honour to be despised , neglected , reuiled , and contemned by all this world , to the end they might become honourable in thy eyes , my Lord , who hath said , Math. 5. 11. that blessed are we , when we are spoken ill of by men , and persecuted by them . Giue me this true humility , I beseech thee , which maketh soules capable of receauing this thy blessing promised to the humble● and those which serue thee for Loue , whose ioy thou thy self art , and who follow thee by the way of the Crosse , which seemeth indeed contemptible in their eyes who do not discern , nor discouer the hidden treasure that lyeth in the confusion receaued , and embraced with the armes of Loue by a faithfull soul , who seeketh nothing but to imitate her beloued , who died the ignominious death of the Crosse to purchace her loue , and to make her of an enemy , to become an intimate , and inward friend of this our heauenly Bride-groome . ☞ This pouerty , and contempt I say , which thy little ones do vndergo in this life , ( my Lord God ) seemeth to the louers of this world , to be an intolerable burthen ; but those that truly walk this way of Humility , ☜ do find that in it lyeth the greatest comfort , and sweetnes that can be found , and enioyed in this world . For thou bearest thy-self the burthen of the humble , and what toucheth them touche●h the apple of thyne eye . Nothing dost thou think to deare for them , seeing all thy gifts , graces , fauours , and comforts , which thy goodnes imparteth to them , they vse only to thy praise , and to the abasing of themselues vnder the feet of all thy creatures , as most vnworthy of this thy mercy , of all of them . O what power hath an humble soul with thee , while she becometh totally subiect to thee , euen as if no power of willing , or choosing were giuen her by thee , which while she doth , well it goes with her before thee , and great is the liberty of such an one , while she only desireth , and seeketh thee . For in doing so , we do become capable in an extraordinary maner of enioying thee , who though thou art not to be seene in this life as thou art , yet an humble soul is not ignorant of thee . For her faith is wonderfully cleered , and great is the knowledg of a soul , which by loue obtaineth the heauenly wisedome of thee , Math. 11. 2 which thou hast hidden from the wise , and prudent of the world , and reuealed it to thy little ones , who sigh , and long without ceasing to become vnited to thy Diuine Maiesty , that thy Praise may be perfected in them to thy eternall Glory . O how frequently , and confidently do these soules fly vnto thee ; and how often are they euen amazed to see thy infinit sweetnes , and most amiable beawty ; Nothing is so present to them , as is this their Lord God ; yea my God , such a knowledg of thee doth Loue caus in an humble soul , that it maketh her for a tyme neither to see , feele , yea nor to think of any thing besides thee ; but this in this vale of teares is not of long continuance , and hath many interruptions by ●eason of the strife between our spirit and our three enemies , the world , the flesh , and the diuel ; but yet thy grace is in all occasions neere to our soul , and nothing shall blemish the purity thereof , if we humbly adhere vnto thee , and wholy mistrust our own forces ( as we well may ) and be confident in thee , who art so mercifull , and pittifull to those who presume not to haue any strength but thee . This humble loue is able to go through all difficulties , and to bear all burthens , and to sustain all paines and disgraces ; becaus it seeketh only thee for her wittnes , who art her glory , her honour , and her crown , most neer , and deare to her , yea euen more present then she is to herself , and more hers then she is her own ; and consequently being wholy forgetfull of herself , she only seeketh , and intendeth thy praise and glory , my Lord God , the peace of her hart , and the comfort of her soul. It seemeth to a soul at first that by denying , forsaking , neglecting , and despising herself she shall vndergo a most grieuous Martyrdom ; but by approaching to thee my God , and conuersing with thee in a most louing , and tender maner , and beseeching thy assistance in all her streightnesses , and necessities , she findeth this way of Abnegation sweet aboue all the delights of the world . ☞ For by rectifying our will , and conforming it in all to thyne , we walk an easy way , and find a ●ast of the ioy , which they feele who are in heauen vnited to thee for all eternity , with whom lett vs praise thee for euer and euer . Amen , Amen , I beseech thee .

THE XII . CONFESSION .

●ant . ● . 7. SI dedexit homo omnem substantiam domus s●ae pro Dilectione , quasinihil despiciet eam . If any Man shall giue a● the substance of his hows for Loue , as if it were nothing He shall dispise it . O my Lord , and my God , to whom only all Loue is due ! Behold I desire with all my hart to giue all for this thy Loue . But alas what hath thy poore seruant to giue thee ? Verily nothing that may deserue this thy Loue , as a requitall , it being aboue all I am , or can suffer , or do . What can I giue thee , seeing I haue nothing but what I haue receaued of thee ? If I giue thee my body , and soul , what is that in comparison of what I owe vnto thee ? them indeed I haue consecrated to thee , but as due to thee by right , not as before appertaining to me , vnlesse I ●ould vsurp that which I was to restore to thee . What then shall I giue ●hee for this thy loue so much desired , and sighed after by me ? If I reflect vpon my selfe , I haue nothing to giue to thee ; But shall I in this my extream ●ouerty , and nothing , despair of gaining , and obtaining this most desirable Loue of thee , which reioyceth my soul euen to name , and speak of to thee ? No , No , I will not feare to obtain it of thee . For if that which I haue , and am , be ( as indeed it is ) short of deseruing this fauour from thee ( which is of being indeed one of those who seek , desire , and loue only thy selfe , and all others meerly for thee ) yet I will giue thy-self to thee , who art all my ioy , and the only desire , and treasure of my hart ; By thy-self I will praise thee , and in thee I wil● hope to be transformed into that loue which shall be swallowed vp in thee for all eternity . Only to loue thee was my soul created , and only by being turned wholy into loue can my soul be truly happy . What can my soul desire out of ●hee , seeing thou art only Good , and the most incomprehensible beawty , which the Angells are neuer satisfyed with beholding , being infinitly delighted while they are wholy turned into the pure loue , and Praise of thee . We heer in this vale of teares do sigh with teares in our eyes , longing to enioy thee , and to be freed from the occasions of offending thy sweet Mercy . We ( I say ) sigh , and make our moane to thee while it is dayly said to our soul , where is thy God ? Yea , euen I say so , speaking to thee , where art thou my Lord , and when shall I without all mean be vnited to thee , that my loue may be intierly bestowed vpon thee , and nothing but thy selfe liue , and raign in me , that without ceasing I might Praise , and Adore thee , the most glorious , and amiable Maiesty , to whom all knees ought to bow ; and prostrat : we ought to acknowledg our meere dependance of thee . O how plaine dost thou sometimes shew it me , that I am nothing , ☜ and lesse then nothing , while I stand before thee , neither can any thing be by iustice due to me , otherwais then by thy meere mercy if I should neuer , so faithfully serue , and praise thee ! For what can they challenge of thee , who were not able so much as to moue , or be without thee , much lesse do any good , or suffer any thing purely for the loue of thee . Giue me therefor , that I may haue to giue vnto thee , seeing by my selfe I am not able according to my desire to loue , and praise thee ; by thy-self without ceasing I will praise , and loue thee , and in thy mercy , and grace shall my soul hope to become truly pleasing to thee ; heere I will by faith adhere to thee , and by loue my soul shall both day , and night aspire vnto thee , till at last by the merits of thy death , & Passion , 1. Cor. 15.55 . death shall be swallowed vp in victory . In the meane time lett the loue of true Charity instruct me , which is more strong then death , that I may faithfully serue thee , though it be not yet admitted me to enioy thee . Lett me rest in nothing but thee , and lett thy name be my defence , and comfort , which to hear , and behold , doth aboue all earthly things delight , and refresh me amidst the stormes of temptations which daily assault me . O my God ; indeed thou art that vnchangeable light , which I euer come to consult with in all my afflictions , and necessities ; and behold● to my vnspeakeable comfort , and strength ) I heare thee giuing answers , by saying this , and commanding that , and this I do by resorting to thee often ! This is that which delighteth me , and I fly as speedily to this pleasure as I iustly may from all the actions which are imposed vpon me euen by necessity it self ; and it exceedingly ●eioiceth me to sitt down and sigh after thee , and by speaking , and writing to , and of thee , to become at least for that short time forgettful of all things besids thee . This is that which maketh the grieuous but then of flesh , and bloud tolerable to me : in which liuing my soul by sin cometh often ( to my grief aboue all other miseries ) wounded to thee , crauing and beseeching , for thy own-sake that I may neuer faile to beg , and find mercy of thee , whom to offend is the only misery that can in this life befal me , and no pain , or difficulty is feared by me , saue so farr as it may ( considering my extreame frailty ) be a meanes to make me offend thee . O Lord do not reiect me , though I haue neuer done any good , and am so farr from truly louing thee ! ☞ I will now take the adui●e giuen me , to fly , be silent , and quiet ; and I will howerly come to learn the song of Loue , and Praise of thee : teach me to know my self , and to know thee . I desir that wisdome which despiseth all for loue of thee , and only that knowledg do I wish for , that securely guideth a soul towards thee , and into thee . Those that loue thee , and seek only to please thee , are those which haue a sight in part , of what in heauen we shall enioy cleerely for all eternity . O what knowledge doth a truly louing soul obtain of thee , and how much is her faith confirmed in the greatnes , beawty , and infinitnes of thy Maiesty ! but alas they are drawn down by the weight of their corruptible flesh , and sometimes euen forgett what they haue with the eyes of their soul seen , and learnt of thee ; and sometimes foolishly think they are something , till they feele the effect of this their misery , and offend thee through their pride , and forgettfullnes of their own nothing , and of the greatnes of thy Maiesty , which pride aboue all things deliuer me from , I beseech thee , becaus it makes soules so odious before thy self and all that loue thee . Lett me giue all Glory to thee , who without any desert of myne , hast thus sweetly with Grace preuented me , for which be thou euer by all Praised , and Adored . Amen .

THE XIII . CONFESSION .

O Lord , whose Power , Maiesty , and Wisedome haue no end , haue mercy on me sinner , and giue me leaue to speak vnto thee my God , and aske thee , whither men are pleasing to thee , becaus they abound with human knowledg . And behold thou affirmest ; no ; but vnhappy are they who can pearce into all things , ☜ if they be ignorant of thee . Lett me therefor loue , and then I shall not be ignorant of that knowledg which maketh soules so pleasing in thyne eyes , to wit , knowledge of thee , and my self . O Loue which in lightnest soules , and inflamest harts w●th chast loue , flow into my soul ! This loue is honourable wisedome , and though the enioyers thereof be accounted fooles by the wise of this world , yet thou hast another opinion of them ; and their humble soules find much fauour in thy pure eyes , my God! With this Loue did those abound , of whom S. Paul speaketh , that they went vp , Hebr. 11. and down in goats skinnes , needy , despised , hidden in dennes , and caues , of whom the world was not worthy ; yet some of thy Saints became very honourable , and glorious euen in the eyes of the world , the which was forced to acknowledge thee great in , and by them ; and there was no resisting of thy wisedome speaking by them , amongst which of these thy seruants was the great S. Augustin Doctor , and light of thy Church a most ardent louer of thee my God . Hee in those books of his that I haue seene , turneth his speaches so to thy Maiesty , that his words thereby become sweeter then ordinary ; and while he declareth his own misery , he giueth to vnderstand to vs thy most aboundant mercy , that all that desire to loue thee my God● may ( being inuited by him ) praise thee with him , and for the fauour shewed by thee to him . O that all to whom thou offrest the fauour of bestowing on them thy diuine Loue , ( if they would after sinning by true Humility dispose themselues for it ) would become ( by his example ) gratefull to thee , and loue thee as thou wouldst by them be beloued ! O how soon dost thou by thy Grace wipe out the sinn●● of such , who now detesting their former il liues do striue by humble loue to become grate●ull to thee for thy preuenting Mercy ? O Lord , my God , though thou hast forgiuen me much , yet I am farr from louing thee much ; Those who now enioy thee , that haue heertofor beene sinners as I , be they Intercessors to thee for me● and be thou euer praised for thy infinit mercy by all thy Maiesties creatures for euer an● euer ; Amen .

THE XIV . CONFESSION●

O Lord my God , who sweetly disposest all things , giue thy poore contemptible creature leaue to speake vnto thee , who art the only desire of my soul , and my hope from my youth , and entierly beloued of my hart ; To thee I will speak , and write , not as to one a far of ; but to stirr vp my soul to Loue thee alone , and to draw occasions out of all things to praise , and exalt thee , whose mercies are aboue all thy works . To whom should I make my moane in all my miseries , but to thy self who art my God , and All , and who art neerer to me , then I am to my self ? To whom should I go to be instructed but to the fountain of all wisedome ? Behold men change their mindes , and almost euery man differeth in opinion from another , in matters that are indifferent , and so great is my ignoran●e , and blindnes naturally , that vn●esse thou instruct me , I shall all waies ●auer , and neuer come to any true ●erfection of knowledg . They stand at ●oo great a hazard , who confide in ●hemselues , and cast not their hope ●holy vpon thee . All creatures are vnstable , and those that seeke not ●hee aboue all creatures , but putt their trust more in men then in thee , will find no true peace in their soules . O that I did truly Loue ! for by Loue only my soul shall becom capable of vnderstanding truth . Loue is humble , ●eaceable , subiect to thee in all things . The soul that loueth thee is more conuersant in heauen then on earth ; and what heere she of necessity must admit of , serues to her rather as a cessation then any consolation . The soul that Loues , findeth occasion in all , and by all things to praise thee my God , and to humble it self . Such are willingly subiect for thee , and do see how odious it is to thee , to see that subiects should contemn , contradict , or withstand th● power in Superiors , and make thei● imperfection a colour for our sinne● If it be right between our soules an● thee , we shall gladly obey thee , spea●ke thou or ordain thou by whom tho●● pleasest . Teach me therefor to obey for thou only canst instruct me wh● true humble Obedience is . If thou d● not teach me , I may perhaps giue to Caesar what is t●yne , and deny to giue Caesar what is due to him by thy will . Let me obey therefor for thee● and in order to thy will , and with an internall regard of thee , whose due is all the subiection , and loue that can be giuen by my poor soul. Open the eyes of my soul that I may see what thou exactest in all things . Instruct me by whom , and in what maner tho● pleasest ; So I may but know what thy will , and pleasure is , it suffizeth thy poore seruant . Giue me grace to obey thee my God , with all that Loue thee , for euer , Amen .

THE XV. CONFESSION .

O Lord my God , what soul that truly loues thee , can complain what difficulties soeuer she endures , or how great a desolation soeuer obscures her soul , or how great paines soeuer she sustaines , seeing thou , whom she loueth more then her life , and self , art always the same , beholding with an amorous , and louing eye , the louing soul , afflicted by thee , or by thy permission , rather to try her fidelity , then to oppresse her with such a burthen that might separate her from her only beloued ; for seeing nothing is dreaded by her but to be seperated from her God , she holding humility , and confidence , thou , O Lord , wilt neuer permit her to be ouercome . For thou makest the quarrel thyne own thus fought by vs , and the victory ours , though indeed gained by thee , not by our own selues . O how happy am I in thy Power , and Glory ? Verily , though I were to return to my own nothing , yet I could not account my self void of an infinit happines , seeing my God , who is more mine then ● am my own , would remain , and be the same in all Wisedome , and Maiesty ; Th●s is the repose of my labour , and the crown of my glory , in which I will exult in my greatest calamities , and miseries , O Loue lett me liue in , and to thee , and dy to all created things whatsoeuer ! O Loue , Loue , liue , raign , and wholy possesse my soul ! Consider not , O my God so much what I am , and haue beene , as what I desire to be . O Lord , my God , and all my Good .

THE XVI . CONFESSION .

O Lord my God ; Father of the poor , and true comforter of all afflicted soules ; be mercifull to my desolate hart , and stirre it vp to perfect loue of thee , that I may simply seek thee , and sigh after thee my beloued absent , and not for the sorrow I feele at the present . Lett me long to embrace thee with the armes of my soul , and think it litle to endure any misery in body , or soul , to be at last admitted into the boosom of my Loue , fairest , and choicest of thousands . Lett all fall down , and adore my God , the glory of my hart . Lett the sound of his Praise be heard to sound , and resound ouer all the earth .

O when shall my soul , hauing transcended it self , and all created things , be firmely vnited to thee , the beloued of my hart , resting in thee , not in thy gifts or graces , and neither desiring , nor taking any satisfaction in any work , or exercise whatsoeuer , but in all paines , temptations , contempts , de●olations , pouerties , and miseries either of body , or mind , conforming my self to thy sweet will for time and eternity , who as iustly as euer thou didst any thing , mayst condemne my soul eternally to hell , from which nothing but thy meere mercy were able to saue , and deliuer me ; and dayly I should incurr this sentence , if thou didst not out of thy goodnes euer help , and protect me , thy sinfull seruant●

This only I desi● , this only I ask , that I may in all things praise thee , and that I may desire no comfort , but to be able without all comfort , human , or diuine , to be true to thee , and not offend thy Ha●osty .

THE XVII . CONFESSION .

TO whom but to thee , my Lord should I fly in all temptations , and Crosses , whose armes are open to embrace , all repentant sinners , and whose hands are lifted vp to giue a sweet benediction to all in misery ; If I either had , or desired to haue any friend , or comforter but thee , I could not with confidence fly into thy bos●ome for succour in this which is now faln on me . I● euer thou hadst reiected any that hoped in thee , I might feare ; but as it is , I will sing in my affliction with tea●es in myne eyes to thee , and neuer leaue to hope in thine aboundant mercy .

Is it much that I serue thee , whom all creatures are bound to serue ? and we are so happy in being subiect to thee , that no lib●r●y is to be compared to the happines of depending of thee .

THE XVIII . CONFESSION .

WHEN thou art present , O my God , then my hart reioiceth , and in pea●e singeth thy praises ; but when thou hidest thy beawtifull face , my soul becometh exceedingly obscured , and troubled ; yea euen ouerwhelmed in darknes , and misery , in which case long remaining ( which is most iustly permitted by thee for my humiliation ) what shall I do to lift vp my soul to thee , but as one sick with loue of her absent beloued ? to speak with him it is impossible , the distance of place is so great ; but yet she may hear others who speak of him , which a little mitigateth her misery , though while he is absent al is irksome to her , becaus the delay afflicteth her hart ; But yet , is she without all comfort ? No ; for she may write to , and of him ; and if none will carry it to her deare beloued , it shall remain by her , that he may see at his return , how she languished for loue , and could take comfort in nothing that all creatures could offer , or propose to her soul , while she possessed not what she only desired ; her life by loue being more with her beloued , then where she liued ; for which caus , she heareth , and yet mindeth not what is said , vnles perhaps they treat , feelingly of her absent loue , and speak in his praise ; She seeth , and yet cannot take comfort in what she beholdeth ; She sleepeth , but her hart waketh ; and in fine while she cannot enioy her beloued , nothing can satisfy her vnquiet hart . Thus my God euen sensual , and vnreasonable loue transporteth a reasonable soul ; But if naturall loue be of that force , what doth that soul feel , whom thou hast wounded with thy pure Loue ? And of what power is that loue that is seconded by thee , who art the fountain of all true Loue , and sweetnes ? What shall I say of a soul that hath tasted how sweet our Lord is ? Verily she yet liuing , dieth a thousand deaths , becaus she seeth herself so far from possessing thee my God , whom none can see , and liue ; nor none enioy as thou art in thy self , till thou free her of the heauy , and sinful burthen of flesh , and bloud● And allthough thou dost admitt her longing , and sighing after thee alone , to , I know not what , nor can I expres , the vnspeakable ioy , and delights , which I say thou some times admittest her to ; ( therein not like to the louers in this world , who oftimes reiect where they are most beloued ) yet out of thy care of her , thou suddainly turnest away thy face , at which till she loue thee for thy self , she will become troubled , and too too impatient in the delay which thou makest of returning to her again ; the which if she bear with a resigned mind , making thy will her law , aboue all the desires of her hart , and sitt solitary like the turtle doue , thou willt in good time assuredly return , and being absent wilt be present to hear her prayers , and see her teares shed for the sorrow she conceiueth to offend thee her desired beloued , whom she would loue withall her hart , with all her soul , and all her strength , and praise thee day , and night without ceasing , as it beseemes a soul languishing with thy loue .

THE XIX . CONFESSION .

REMEMBER , O my God , that thou madst me for to loue thee . Why therefor dost thou permit me to offend so sweet a Goodnes ? Although none do find thee in an extraordinary maner in the bottome of their soules , but those that serue thee my God for Loue , and walk by the way of the Crosse , yet I do confidently affirm , that thy yoke , and burthen , thy Law , and thy Crosse , are not by far so heauy , greeuous , and burthen ●ome , as be the pain●ul wayes of ●in , which seeme ●o be sweetned with some delights● but in the hart it proueth more bitter then gall ; whereas thy yoke being born by a truly louing soul , is many times heauy when thou leauest her , thereby to shew her , how little she can do , or suffer of her self , and that she may glory in thee , and not in her own power , and humble herself , and not preferre her●elf before others ; when I say thou pleasest to leaue her thus as it were forlorne , she feeleth indeed a great burthen , and nothing can comfort her , till thou her desired , and only beloued return . For she hauing forsaken all for thee , and hauing tasted of thy sweetnes , saieth with the Prophet ; Psal. ● . 8.37 Turn away myne eyes that they see not vanity ; least like a dog she return to her vomit ; and after hauing had a glimering of thy light , she , becaus she feared she should not be able to sustain thy chastisements and shou●d forgett , and loose herself by these tribulations , and desirous that she might be happily enabled to en●er the more fully into thee , and fearing ( I say ) her own frailty , she thus againe crieth out to thee by these other words of the Psalmist , saying ; Pas. 187.2 . Domine Deus salutis meae ; in die clamaui & nocte coram te . O Lord God of my saluation , day , and night haue I cryed after Thee . For who but thy self can comfort a soul that indeed neither seekes nor desires any thing but thee my God ? O when shall I spend all my strength , and forces in singing thy Praises ! Who would sett their harts vpon any thing but thee , seeing thou hast made all other things so hard to be obtained , that we might seeke only thee , for whom we were made , and whose Loue we may more easily obtaine then any thing els whatso●uer ? O lett me Loue thee , who only for that end didst create me ! We would haue that which is worth nothing , and many times greiue for the losse of that which would but cause vs perplexity , and trouble to haue ; In the meane time neglecting that which thou so infinitly desirest to bestow vpon vs , to wit , thy loue , then which noth●ng is so good , or sweet , or that bringeth such true peace to the soul.

THE XX. CONFESSION .

WITHOVT paine , it is impossible ( O my most Amiable God ) to liue in loue . But if the difficulties which thy true friends , and seruants feele , were weighed with the miseries of those , who rather seek to please themselues , and others then thee - there would be found an infinit dis●parity . For thy yoke is sweet , and thy burthen light to the simple , and humble , and to those who serue thee for loue , and whose ioy thou thy self art , and who nothing els but thee , my God , do se●k for , in time , or eternity , These I say , are despised , contemned , afflicted , pained , tempted , troubled , and many times sit sorrowfull with a heauy hart , and sad countenance ; But thy will being their law , and thy disposition their consolation , I may boldly affirme , that in all this they suffer nothing , in comparison of the fond● louers of this world ; becaus thou being euer more present to them then t●ey to themselues , dost when thou seest thy time refresh their souls with the light , and comfort of thy grace ; yea seeming to be euen prodigall of thy sweetnes , to such as abide faithfull to thee in their tribulations , and hope , confide , and glory in thee , and not in themselues , and who take occasion in all they see , heare , suffer , ouercome , to humble themselues vnder thy mighty hand , and blesse , and praise thy Iustice , and Mercy in all things whatsoeuer ; Amongst which number admit me poor , and contemptible sinner , to thy greater glory ( for this thy Mercy ) from all creatures , for euer and euer Amen .

THE XXI . CONFESSION .

O My Lord , and my God , remoue al impediments between thy Goodnes , and my poor soul , that I may loue thee , who only deseruest all loue , and honour . Giue me an humble , and peacefull hart , that thou maist inhabit therein , as thou desirest Suppres in me by thy sweet Grace the sin of pride which maketh me as yet so odious to thy Diuine Maiesty . O if we did but by true Humility abase our selues , what beames of true light would shine in the bottome of our souls ! O what amity is there between thy Diuine Maiesty , and an humble soul ! Nothing but Humility could haue drawn thee down to the earth ; and only Humility can make vs capable of being drawn by ●hee vp to heauen . The truly humble conuers familiarly with thee , and thy Saints ; They presuming nothing of themselues can do all things in thee who strengthnest them . And thou art so chary , and tender of the humble , that what concerneth them , thou esteemest to concern thy owne self , and euen thy own hart ; And they thinking they do nothing , do by thee do all things . Many vnknown to the world● and of no esteem wi●h it , shall before thee haue the honour , and mer●t in the next world , of that which no● other men boast of , and attribute to themselues For the humble liuing stil in their own nothing , giue all glory to thee , by whom only all good is performed , in the mean while thou enriching them of thy meere Mercy with thy Merits . O happy exchange , thin● for ours , durt for the most pure gold What is all we can do ? Verily nothing . Enrich me therefor poor begger with some-what of thyne ; At th● feet I lay whatsoeuer thou giuest , o● hast giuen me : Giue , or take away 〈◊〉 thou pleasest , so thou do not blot m● out of the book of life . Open to me knocking at the door of thy Mercy . I haue been fiue and twenty yeares ( this signifieth her age at the , writing heerof , as that she was then fiue and twenty years olde ) in my infirmity of most loathsome sinnes ; behold my misery , and take pitty vpon me Sonne of Dauid ! I defiled that ●oul that was made to thy owne Image , and liknes ; haue compassion on her , who hath no other friend , or comforter , but thy self the only desired of my hart . For thy owne sake be propitious to my sin for it is much . Nothing that I haue done can I alleadg to thee , which hath deserued any reward in thine eyes ; Onely desires , of which manie burn in hell , they being little without good works . Giue her to drink who withers away for want of thee the fountain of al sweetnes . I will powre out my soul before thee , that at least I may comfort my self with relating to thee my sinnes , and miseries . Behold all my ennemies triumph ouer me , of whom most easily in all temptations they get ●he victory . Fight for me ; or els I know not what will become of me ; giue me true Humility by which all things are easily ouercome , and all thou exactest , most perfectly accompl●shed by vs thy Maiesties poor creatures . Giue thy self to me● who hath nothing of her own to offer thee ; and if thou giue me thy self , I am as rich as I desire to be ; and if thou shouldst besto● vpon me all thou hast , or can create , it would be little to me , vnles I possessed thee . By thy felf I Praise thee , whose name doth not be-seeme the mouth of a sinner . O let me Loue , or not liue ! I giue my self to thee , whome alone I wish for , and desire with all the forces of my hart , and soul. O my God , how neere thou art to vs , ready to heare and receaue our prayers and petitions ? Behold thy s●ee● prouidence sheweth it self in all things ! O how long shall my God be thus ●orgotten by creatures ! When wilt thou by Loue be by all sought after , as thou oughtest to be by vs ?

THE XXII . CONFESSION .

O My Lord , let all things praise thee ! Let thy iust will be our law . Let subiects humbly obey in , and for thee . For inferiors contending , and withstanding their Superiors in that thou wouldst haue them obey in , ☜ is most odious in thine eyes , and nothing they can do will please thee , vnles they will heare thy voice as well by others , as from thy self . For it is not so much the greatnes of the action that thou regardest , as the being don by vs in that maner thou wouldst haue it don by vs , and in nothing can wee obey thee as wee ought to do , vnles wee first regard , and intend thee in that which by vs is accomplished ; and a Superior reflecting on his owne authority , rather then on what in thy behalf he ought to exact ; in that case or cases , and rather on what by his power he can command , then on what according to thy pleasure were best to be done , rath●r gouerneth in his owne power then in thine , and the effect ( vnles it be very streight and right betweene his subiect● harts , and thee ) will consequently be more human then diuine ; and the Superiors while sensible of their honour abusing the power giuen by thee , doe yet loose what they would haue . For their subiects often looking vpon rather what is defectiue in the Superior , then vpon their owne duty , both of them faile in their duties to thy dishonour , who so sweetly hast disposed of all things , if we did not peruert thine order , with seeking , not thee , and thine honour , but our own , and our selues , from which misery blesse vs , I beseech thee for thine own sake , that thou mais● be glorified both in the Commaunders , and the Obeyers .

THE XXIII . CONFESSION .

O How happy are those thou instructest in thy Law , and in whom it goeth streight between their soules and thet . For their only care is to please and praise thee in all things . These humbly obey for thee , and see how dangerous it is to resist thy will in any thing how little soeuer . But very much must we striue to humble our selues , if we desire to know , and stand vnto the things that are exacted of vs by thee . For nothing is able to inlighten our blindnes , but thy Grace shining in an humble soul. If we knew neuer so much and could do wonders , if we had neuer so great guifs of nature and grace , ☜ yet could we not thereby become pleasing to thee , vnles withall we were diligent in the exercise of true Humility . O giue me this Guift ! For none of himsef is able to attain to it . My God , make me truly humble that I may be wholy thine . Let me by Loue adhere to thee , that all impediments may be remoued between my soul , and thee . Let all created things be to me as if they were not , as to their becoming any impediment between my poor soul , and thy Godnes , that so I may not be hindred by any thing from being vnited to thee . For this thou maidst our souls , that by thy Grace we might return to thee , whom by sinne we had straied from , and that humbly seeking to Loue thee , and vsing all things created only to this end , that we may at last find , and possesse ●hee , who only art able to satiate vs ; and therefor miserable are we , when we seek any things beside thee , from which doing I beseech thee defend vs . Amen .

THE XXIV . CONFESSION .

NOn in solo pane viuit homo , sed in omni verbo quod procedit de ore Dei . Math. 4. 4. These are thine o●● wordes , my Lord , ●hich I rehears be●ore thee ( to whom● powre out my hart and my soul ) ●ith vnspeakable ioy , hoping that ●hy word shall be a light vnto my feete , that I may auoid the ginnes and snares , which the world , the ●●esh , and the diuell doe lay to catch ●nd intrap my sinful , and weak ●oul . Thy words indeed are sweet because thou speakest Peace to the hart , and giuest by them strength ●o the soul. It is well known to thee why I do thus dilate my self in speaking and writing to thee , my Lord and my God , rehearsing to thee , to whom all things are manifest , the desires , intentions , and afflictions , or comforts of my hart . For as th●u●ell ●ell knowst , if I should not when ● enioy some more interior light set down in writing some thiugs which I may peruse at other times that ●re of obsurity , I should be apt to forget to praise thee , ☞ yea and eue● wither away with the grief and anguish which by thy sweet permission ouerwhelmeth my soul ; be th●● blessed for all ; who take away 〈◊〉 beseech thee , or giue , as it best plea●seth thee , from thy poore seruant● only depriue me not of Grace● So I may Loue thee , I care not wha● happeneth to me . Let thy will be done for time , and eternity . Roo● out of my soul that pride whic● maketh me so far from being tha● thou wouldst haue mee to be . My desire is great to Praise , loue , honour , and truly serue thee ; but my power is so little , that none hath been lesse faithfull to thee , then I ; But where doth the liberality of thy infinite merc● extend it self more willingly , the● where there is greatest pouerty an● misery ? Though I be poor yet m● Lord is rich ; though I be in al blindnesse , as to the discerning of trut● yet my Lord is light it selfe . To him therefore I will approach , that in his light I may see light . I will begge of thee , that I may become capable of gloriyng in thy riches , and then nothing shall be wanting to me , see●ng my Lord possesseth in hims●lfe all good things . Be thou my Lord what ●hou art , and I a miserable sinner casting mine eyes vpon the earth doe cry to thee to bee mercifull to my sinnes . I sitting heere in the ●hadowe of death , morne , and lament , that I haue made no more hast to conclude an euerlasting ●eague and peace with my Lord God , to whom now my soul doth aspire day and night without ceasing . O my Lord when I remember what ●hou hast done for me , I faint and faile to see how vngratefull for it I haue been and am to thee ! What didst thou meane to helpe me , and ●ecall me from my sinnes , when I least thought of thee ? And not content with that , R. F. Baker thou didst also by means of a faithfull seruant of thine , make my state which was so heauy ● burthen to me through my fault , and ignorance , to become so delightfull to me , that I may and do truly acknowledg , that thy yoke of Religion is sweet aboue all the de●lights , and pleasures of the world , and thy burthen so light , that crosses paines , afflictions internal , and ex●ternal born , as thy burthen are most light and easie , and cause more true peace to my hart , then I can expres , which be it said to thy honour : and grant me to humble my self in al , that I may grow stil more and more pleasing to thee , who art the only desire of my hart , and comfort of my soul. ☞ Let his instructions of whom I speak to thee , according to his desire still more and more inflame my loue vnto thee . Be thou all in all , and aboue all , vnto me . If thou teach not my soul to loue , in vain is the endeauour of man speaking and preaching to me . Let me ●eare thee by him , and let me not so harken to him without ; that I grow deaf to thee who art within . Thy words are works . Either speak by others for our good , or by t●y self in the most interior of our soul. O happines , that there should be such a capacity in vs of hauing relation to thee in all things ! Al things created may faile vs ; but thou who only canst fatiat our harts , canst neuer change or alter , but art stil the same , and thy yeares shall not faile . Thou teachest a soul true Humility and solid vertue . In thee nothing is neglected ; thou art the Maiester of Perfection . Thou teachest the simple , humble , and louing soul thy wayes and giuest her hidden Manna , in the strength of which she may walk euen to the hous of her God where she shall praise him for euer and euer . Qui ambulat simpliciter , ambulat confidenter ; who walketh simply , walketh confidently ; if we loue thee , all will cooperat to good , which graunt to thy own Praise . Amen .

THE XXV . CONFESSION .

Io. 8. 2 OMnis populus venit ad Iesum , & sedens docebat eos . All the people came Iesus , and hee sitting taught them . Can I heare and consider these words written by thy best beloued Disciple , and not euen melt into tears of ioy ? If indeed any had been by thee my Lord reiected , I might haue feared , and that most iustly , remembring my past , and present sinnes . But to put me out of feare , and doubt , thy holy Euangelist saith , Omnis all . To thee therefor I will fly , and of thee I will learn , how I may Please , Praise , and loue thee , and how by true Humility , I may dye to my self and all created things : Hereby wholy to liue to thee my all , and onely good . Thou knowst that my soul without ceasing doth long after thee , and to see it-self free from all that which is a hindrance to my perfectly louing thee . O● Loue of my Lord God , how forcible art thou in a pure soul ? O who will giue thee to me , that my hart may be purged , and purified , thereby to becom a pleasing habitation for my God ? O Lord , who art Goodnes it self ; can there be found any ioy , comfort , or true content in any thing but thee ? Can there I say ? for as for me ; far hath it been from thee to permit any thing but thy self to be sweet to mee . O all ye that think it a burthen to be obliged by your Profession to tend to great Perfection , and fear the punishment of our doing the contrary , raise vp your harts , ☜ and remember what it is that our Lord exacteth of you by this your Profession ! and this as it may seeme at first a seuere exaction , so remember wel , and consider ( I say ) what it is , and your harts will rejoyce , that feare our Lord . It is , O it is , to loue , without bounds or measure ; It is to leaue your self , that you may find God ; It is to fly from the world that you may hear our Lord speaking peace to your soul ; It is to submit , and subiect your self wholy to him whose will none can resist , but as they are permitted by him ; It is to be subiect to euery liuing creature for him , who submitted himsef to the death of the Cross , that we might become capable of enioying him ! This is that he exacteth of vs , who haue dedicated our souls wholy to him ; This is that he requireth , which though at first it seeme a burthen to perform , yet that which seemeth so , is indeed quite otherwise , ☞ as we shal find in effect , if we perform that out of loue , which out of his loue to vs , he exacteth of vs . For what is sweeter then to loue ? Yea and to loue him , whom the more we loue the more it becometh delightful to vs to loue ; the more strict our obligation is to him the lighter is our burthen we haue to beare ; For he doing all that he hath done for vs to bring vs into this state to oblige vs to loue , doth also , if we be not the hindrance , oblige himself to giue vs this Diuine loue of his , which is able to vnite a poor contemptible creature to his Diuine Maiesty , whom we are not worthy to name . O sweet and most desirable yoke ! well maist thou be said to be sweet , thou bringing true and perfect liberty . For loue maketh light all burthens , and sweetneth al labours ; and to them that loue , it is easy to suffer any aduersities for their loueds sake ! O let me being obliged by thee to loue , let me , I say , through thy mercy obtain this loue of thre , which maketh a soul in all things grateful , and faithful to thee ! Let me not offend thee in my miseries , and then come as many as pleases thee ; for I account that only a misery , to wit , to offend thee . Let all things praise thee , and let me in all praise thy Diuine Maiesty , with them that loue thee . Behold , Fire , Sea , Snow , Thunder , Lightning , Hail , and ●he Spirits of storms do thy will ; and yet I in all contradict it , who am capable of thy loue , and am inuited to loue so many ways by thee my God . O let this thy loue wholy posses my soul , that all that is within me may blesse thy holy Name ! I renounce into thy hands all that is in me contrary to this thy loue ; Let it wholy consume me that I may be wholy turned into loue , and that nothing els may be desired by me . Let me be drowned , and swallowed vp in that of Diuine loue , in which my soul may swim for all eternity , neuer more by sin to be separated from thee . O when wil this day come , that I may return to thee my beginning ! When will thy Glory appeare ? When shal death be swalowed vp in victory , that I may without ceasing Praise thee my God , whose name I write with no smal comfort , though otherwise I be so drie , that I can scarce think vpon thee . To heare th●e named , or to write to , or of thee , refresheth my soul in al her misery , and to it I flye from the thoughts , feares , and cares which as thou knowst often oppres me for my humiliation , who for my pride deserue iustly to be reiected for euer by thee ; But in such case I hope both liuing and dying , that thou my Lord art my God , my Mercy ; and what is wanting to me , I shal aboundantly posses , if I confide only in thee , which grant that I may not faile to do , who only art to be Adored for all eternity . Amen .

THE XXVI . CONFESSION .

ERant appropinquantes ad Iesum Publicani , Luk 1 .1 . & peccatores , vt audirent illum ? There were sinners and Publicans approaching to Iesus that they might hear him . This is writ in the Gospel of this day my Lord , which doth much comfort my sinfull soul , flying to thee for help , and succour in the necessities wherein I daily languish . For none didst thou euer reiect , neither sick , as witnes the Leapers , and diuers others which were abhorred by men for their loathsom diseases , nor the deformed , nor the blind , nor the lame , nor the poor and contemptible , no nor the sinners whose loathsome sinnes made their souls much more deformed in thy pure eyes , then any disease could make a body in the eyes of the beholders . But why do I presume to speak to my God in this simple maner ? verily my Lord , only presuming of the most aboundant fountain of thy mercies , do I thus refresh my soul with recounting these things before thee becaus these places in the Ghospel which treat so particularly of thy receauing , and forgiuing sinners doth particularly appartain to me , who hauing among them found grace in this kind before thee , I do likwise in these things I read , find that which putteth me in hope of the continuance of thy Mercy . Behold I desire now to conuert my hart wholy to thee , and to becom totally in all things subiect to thy Diuine Maiesty . Let thy Grace affist me . For it is not any thing I can do , can saue me . The Angel that hath care of me , praise thee for me , and assist me with his intercession for me . Thy Mother hath been indeed a Mother to me ( for which be she honoured for all eternity , as it beseemeth so great an humility to be ) she vouchsafing to take pitty on me poor miserable sinner , for all which Praise be to thee my God and All , for all eternity . Amen .

THE XXVII . CONFESSION .

PAtientia pauperum non peribit in finem . Ps. 9. 19. The patience of the poor shal not perish in the end . O Lord , my God , seeing the way of the Cross is the way that al in this life must walk , of what state , or dignity soeuer they be ; none exempted from suffering , some in body by paines , and sicknes ; some by pouerty , and want of necessaries ; some by loss of friends ; some by the disloialty of such whom they confided in ; ☜ some by loss of their goods by fire , wars , and the like , and some by their own indiscretion , vnwarines , and want of foresight falling into disgrace ; some by setting their affection where it is reiected , grow desperate mad ; and some therby liuing in perpetual discomfort become woful murtherers of themselues ; some fortune frowning vpon them , haue al things go contrary to their desire ; and in fine , no place , no person , nor any condition can be free from suffering in this miserable life . But shal we think this was ordained to be thus by thee , by chance , or becaus thou dost not loue what thou hast made ? No , God forbid we should euer think so ; but that which made thee ordain it so , was only to the end that we being proued or tried● as gold in the furnace , should thereby become capable of thy pure loue ; the which if we could obtain , easy would it be to suffer any thing which thou permittedst to happen vnto vs . For as for some of the Crosses , which happen in this life , we are the caus of them our selues ; and by them we not only suffer paine , but also detriment in our souls ; becaus they proceed from our yeilding to sin . and giuing way to our passions , and in ordinat affections , therby becoming a slaue to sensuality ; ouer which we should be absolute maisters , if we did , as we ought , concur with thy grace . And verily , my God , to whom I speak and write with much content to my soul , thou by this meanes inlightning me with that diuine truth which leadeth in some sort to thy self , and much inflameth my hart with a most ardent desire of thee the only desire of my soul , to whom I1 aspire day and night , without ceasing , in my simple man●r : Verily I say that I am ignorant how it is possible to proceed with any confidence , or comfort in any thing , if our foundation be not founded in thee by a sincere intention . For til I resolued , what difficulties soeuer ther by I endured , to make thy wil mine owne and thy Disposition , my consolation , I found no stability in any thing , ☜ or exercise whatsoeuer ; ☞ and since that time I haue found certeinty and quiet in all the vncerteinty of contrary occurrence . For if thou be intended in al our actions , what should we fear● For we only intending and desiring thy honour in all things , how can we doubt but that this by thee in al things wil be accomplished , seeing that which thou dost desire and wil we should seek , and intend ( to wit they honour ) which is only aimed at by vs ? Can we imagin thou wilt saile on thy part , we desiring to do what lyeth in vs ? No , No , but con●idently we may hope , that nothing shal be wanting to vs ; and thou kwnowst , my Lord God , that when any thing happeneth , which seemeth so to derogate from thy diuine honour , that it greiueth my hart , thou presently quietest me with these words saying to my soul. Psal. ●5 ●1 . Vacate & videte quoniam ego sum Deus , exaltabor in gentibus , & exaltabor in terra . Be quiet , and see that I am God : I shall be exalted among the Gentils , and shall be exalted in the earth . With these words , I say , thou comfortest my soul. For though I haue desired to make an exchange with ●hee , that I may take only care to seeke thy honour in al things , committing the care of my welfare to ●h●e , yet in those things , which happen as I think contrary to thy honour , ☜ I ought to conforme my wil to thy sweet disposition , or permission , and not disquiet my soul vnder any pretence whatsoeuer . For the quiet and humble hart is the place where thou delightest to dwell . Thou who art the God of Peace , giue me that ●rue loue of thee , which only bringeth true Peace , and blesse this thy little flock , and especially those in it ●ho are by their patience and discretion helpers and furthers to true peace and concord in this poor Conuent of thine ; My most dea●e Lady ●hy Mother , and mine by thy sweet Mercy , pray to thee for this hous of hers , as also our good Angels , ●ho haue care of vs . Saint Michael ●ho was so zealous of his honour , Saint Raphael who guides vs in the way of thy Law , Sanit Gabriel , who brought vs the happy tidings of thy coming into this world , to reconcile vs sinners to thy heauenly Father , Our most holy Father S. Benedict , our Mother S. Scholastica , as also S. Ioseph , S. Iohn , S. Thomas , and S. Gertrude , in whose hart ●hou didst delight to dwell ; and also my beloued Father S. Augustin , whom thou hast giuen me in a particular maner , to be a help to me in doubts and feares , and an incouradgement by his books to hope for pardon for my innumerable sins , and as a fire are al his words to inflame me to seek after and aspire to thy diuine loue , and to wish only , that that may wholy posses my soul , which grant for his sake , as also thine owne , who art Blessed for euer . Amen .

THE XXVIII . CONFESSION .

INCINA cor meum Deus in testimonia tua ; Psal. 118. Ecce concupui mandata tua ; in aequitate tua viuifica me-Incline , my God , my hart to thy testimonies , and in thy truth quicken my soul. For behold my soul doth exceedingly couet to performe thy law . For thy law is truth , and the effect thereof is Iustice , and Peace , and Ioy in the holy Ghost . When I remember how I haue strayed from thee by sin , I become ashamed before th●e . But when I consider thy Mercy I hope stil ( notwithstanding what is past ) to become through thy grace , which so sweetly preuented me , pleasing to thy Diuine Maiesty . O Lord , inlighten my soul obscured● by sin and ill customes ; inlighten it that I may walk the way of Iustice , and Truth , which is the way wherof thou speakest by Esaie the Prophet , Esaio 35. 8. in which a foole cannot err , as he affirmeth● O let me by true Humility become a fool according to his meaning , let me become as a bittle child , that I may be capable of entring into the Kingdom of Heauen ! Certeinly we ought to liue so subiect to thee , that we haue no election of any thing , as pretending our selues , for time , or eternity ; And also we ought to haue in our soul such a relation to thee , that in thy lig●t , in thy truth , and wholy according to thy will , we perform all we do , and out of that respect omit what we omit . ☞ O my God , let me , I say , walk this way of Loue which knoweth not how to seck it-self in any t●ing whatsoeuer ! Let this Loue wholy posses my soul , and hart ; which I beseech thee may liue , and moue only in , and out of a pure , and sincere loue to thee , who aboue all ought to be loued and desired . Let this fire , which thou camst into this world to send , and willedst it should burn , consume me wholy into it self , that forgetful of my self , and al created things , I may be mindfull of thee , my Lord , and my God . It is thy p●omise , that where sin ●ath abounded , gra●e shall superbound , that the riches of thy Mer●y may appear and shew it-self to the Glory of thy holy Name ; which Mercy , I beseech thee , extend itself ●o me , that I may praise thee for euer and euer . O that thy pure loue were ●o grounded and established in my hart , that I might sigh , and pant ●ithout ceasing , after thee , and be ●ble in the strength of this thy Loue , ●o live without al● comfort and con●olation , human , or diuine , therby ●o become the more conformable to ●hee , the beloued of my soul ! O how ●appy are they that truly loue t●ee ? ●ertainly , whatsoeuer they suffer , it ●● very tolerable to them , be●aus he or whose loue they suffer , is th●ir hel●er ; Indeed , my Lord , thou art a hiden God ; but yet not so hidden from ●ur soul , but that in some sort we ●aue therin according to our poor ●apacities , not only a tast , but also sight of thee ; for as euen thou thy self hast said ; Mat. 5. 8. Blessed are the cleane of hart , for they shall see God . O sight to be wished , desired , and longed for● becaus once to haue seen thee is to haue learnt al things . Nothing can bring vs to this sight , but loue . But what loue must it be ? Not a sensible loue only , a childish loue , a loue which seeketh it-self , more then the beloued . No , but it must b● an ardent loue , a pure loue , a couradgious loue , ☞ a loue of Charity , an● humble loue , and a constant loue , not worn out with labours , no● daunted with any difficulties . O Lord giue this loue vnto my soul , that ● may neuer more liue , nor breath bu● out of a most pure loue of thee , my All and only Good ! let me loue thee fo● thy self , and nothing els , but in an● for thee . Let me loue nothing in stee● of thee . Cant. 1. 8. For to giue al for loue is ●● most sweet bargain ; for Loue is as stron● as death . O that this thy loue might flo● in such aboundance into the har● of al capable therof , that the son● of thy loue , and Praise might conti●nually be heard through out al the earth ! O what do we do louing vanity , and seeking a lye ? What do ●●e abusing the most noble capacity of our souls by desiring that which passeth away like smoak ? What do ●●e louing that which is more changeable then the Moon ? Can any ●hing satiate our harts but our God ? Can we find true repose out of him ? ●s any thing worthy of our loue , but ●hat Goodnes which is loue it-self , and ●hom the more we loue , the more we ●re able to loue ; becaus for loue , he made vs capable of loue ? But alas , my God , my soul was in honour , ●nd I knew not it ; I was compared ●o beasts , and by sin became like to ●hem , or worse then they . Is this my equital for al thy loue ? Is this ex●usable that my soul made by thee●o ●o be delighted with the food of ●ngels ( which is loue ) should delight ●●-self with the bread of swine ? O is ●y hart able to rehears this before ●●ee and not through excessiue grief ●reak in sunder ? Could I in my nature not abide to be di●loyall to one whom I found to be a faithful friend to me ? and can I endure to remember my disloyalty to my God ? Could I with ioy vndergo for my friend , ☞ disgrace , and difficulty , and can I endure nothing for my God ? Was the absence of a deare friend intolerable to me , and can I abide to see my self cease at any time to sigh and long after my God ? O no my God , let that be far from me , I heere renounce before heauen and earth al inordinate affections to cre●tures Place with thy own hands t●● loue in their room● that it expelling thence al ●hat now is therein d●●pleasing to t●ine eyes , thou ma●● thy sel● wholy posses me giuing and distributing my affections , and disposing the passions of my ha●● according to thy sweet will , which only is iust , only holy and true i● it-self . C how sinceare then are o● affections , when we loue our neig●●bour only in , and for thee ? The●● we pitty not one , and are hard harted to another according to the inclination of our peruerse nature , but behold thee in al , and consequently willingly serue and assist al for thy loue ; then we do not shew our seues meek only to our friends ; but also to those by whom we suffer most contradiction , and gladly vpon all occasions extend our charity . For there is no true friendship but that which is founded vpon thee , and which is maintained without impediment to thy loue . ☜ This is only the loue of Charity : which Charity knoweth not how to repine , to be angry , to be exceptious , to be inconstant , to be troublesom , to be suspicious , or iealous ; for it regardeth thee in al , and desireth thee aboue al ; It taketh al in good part ; it wondreth not to see men exceed in words , finding it-self , so often to offend in deeds ; it beareth al things , it hopeth al things , and it confideth in thee aboue al things ; it wisheth only that thy will may be performed in al and by al creatures ; by which meanes it retaineth true peace in al that happeneth . O giue me this ●hy loue which worketh such wonderful effects in an humble soul ! Giue it to me , and I wil aske thee no more . Let it posses my soul , that nothing but thy self may be loued , or desired by me . Can thy Goodnes find in thy hart to see me thus languishing for want of thy loue , seeking my self● in al things , and not being able out of true loue to suffer any thing ? It is true tho● hast made my soul to loath all created things , and hast shewed me most plainly that all is vanity and affliction of spirit , saue to loue thee , and that nothing is permanent vnder the Sun , ●and that vain and inconstan● is euery creature liuing , so that 〈◊〉 cannot , me thinks if I would ( so am I held by thee ) desire the friendship , or fauour of any creature ; but this is not sufficient for me ; an● therefor take pitty on me begging and beseeching grace , and mercy o● thee ; It suffiseth not me that my sou● refuseth to be comforted , but I mus● also remember my God , that with his loue my soul may be inflamed . Art thou ignorant that my soul hauing had through thy sweet Mercy , a tast of thee , cannot find comfort in any thing but in inioying of thee ? O no , this is as al other things are , most manifest to thee ; and if thou wouldst not haue had me thus for loue to importune thee , thou wouldst not haue made me incapable of being satisfied without thee ; This which I say , I do not speak of presumption , but out of the vrgent desir of my hart , ●hich hath resolued to conuert it self wholy to thee ; thou who didst bid me to aske , hast promised I shall re●eaue ; thou who didst bid me knock , ●ast promised it shall in time con●enient be opened to me● which ●owre , O my Lord , when shall it be , ●hat without ceasing I may praise ●hee , and neuer any more offend thee ? ●Til which be granted me , I wil sigh ●fter thee , and in my hart in the bit●ernes of my soul , I will cal vpon ●hee ; and somtimes I wil also being enabled , and inuited thereunto by thee , sing loue songs to my well-beloued , who is euer within the hearing of me● For thou art not like the louers o● this world ( vpon whom that loue yet which is only due to thee is often bestowed ) heere to day and ● far off to morrow : No , no , thus i● is not between thee and thy louers . Fo● though thou triest them , that thei● loue may become more pure , ye● thou , seeing them begin to faile vn●der their burthen , dost quickly ca●● thine eyes vpon them , and with t●● sweet dew of thy Grace refreshe● them , that by these changes thei● loue may grow more strong , and b● firmely established in thee , who ar● that only thing which is only neces●sary for me , and which only I re●quire of thee . Let this thy loue wor● in and by me , becaus thou rewarde● no works but thine own , and let m● loue thee , as thou wouldst be belou● by me , I cannot tell how much lo●● I would haue of thee , becaus I woul● loue thee beyond all that can be ima●gined , or desired by me ; be thou in this as in al other things , my chooser for me , who art my only choice , most deare to me ; Pas. 86. 3. Glorious things are said of thee my Lord and God , the most absolute , and amiable beawty ; the more I shall loue thee , the more wil my soul desire thee , and to suffer for thee . Let me loue thee for thy self , and not any thing insteed of thee ; and let my whole substance by thy loue , and Praise be consumed in me , that I may return pure vnto thee , who be by al in Heauen , and Earth blessed and loued fer euer and euer . Amen .

THE XXIX . CONFESSION .

O My God , my only beloued ; me thinks I heare thee sweetly checking my soul with these words ; ( when vnder what pretence soeuer ) I pretend by my care , or vnreasonable solicitude , that more then One thing is necessary to my soul , therby falling into that multiplicity whic● is so apt to dimme , and obscure our soul , and so contrary to a pure tending to Thee our only good , and to a remouing of al impediments between our souls and thee by transcending al created things whatsoeuer ) these words I say ) thou often speakest to my hart ; Luk 24. . Quem quaeris mulier , viuentem cum mortuis ? Whom dost thou seek woman , one liuing amongst the dead ? But Lord I answer t●ee now in al desir , and hum●lity of hart , that I seek nothing but thy felf , no guift , no comfort , or sweetnes ; no friends but thy self , and thy heauenly Cittezens ; no power but of wishing that thy wil may be my law ; no honour but thine ? no consolation but that I may in solitude , and silence al the dayes of my li●e be able to liue without all consolation human , or diuine , no recreation by conuersation , or other business , or imployments , but so far as it is nec●ssar● to beare vp my spirit to attend vnto t●ee more seriously at conuenient times , and rather let al necessary distraction , by help of thy Grace serue , as a meere cessation ; then by the least affection to them , or comfort in them , they should become an impediment to my aspiring to thee . For this is a rule thou knowst hath been g●uen me by a faithfull seruant of thy diuine Maiesty , R. F. Baker who indeed gaue me most generall i●structions , that we might not be ●yed to him , or any other creature , but might being left more free to thee , fly the more freely with wings of Diuine loue , ☜ which carieth a soul euen in human flesh aboue all that is not thy very self ; of such force is thy Grace concurring with our will , which is by na●ure capable of an ●nfinite extent towards thee , when as it neither seeketh , intendeth , desireth , willeth , nor resteth in any ●hing● , but the● ; T●is ( I say ) was his generall rule that if we did not do ●hings with affection , they would cause vs no hurtfull distraction , which grant may be so vnto me I beseech thee , ☜ who am not able without much , and often diuerting my ind to indifferent things , to attend to thee in my soul at other fitting times , and this by reason of my great weaknes of body and head . Let al this imperfection in mee , humble me and let it be no impediment to my truly louing , seruing , praising thee , and adhering only to thee , which is my only desire by al I do● or omit . Let not my gre●uous sinnes past , or present too much deiect , or trouble mee ; but let them serue to humble my soul , and be a meanes totally to subect it to thee and al others , so far as it is thy wil it should be . Let me praise thee in al , whose prouidence , and care hath been so infinit great towards me thy most contemptible creature , the which verily I may , and must confesse , and acknowledge to thee most particularly in this , that thou hast so particularly , and plainly as thou hast done for my humiliation , discouered my sinnes vnto me , wherby I might know and confesse my● obligation to thee ; and ●ith al compassion on the sinnes , and imperfections of others , which they also are permitted to fal into , that rising vp , their loue may be the great●r , when they remember it before thee ; And this I may add to thy greater glory , that thou didst reserue this kno●ledg of my sin●ul , and miserable state from me till by meanes of thy said seruant , V. F Baker I was put into the way of loue , and aspiring to thee ; for els it would haue wholy deiected , and ouerwhelmed me be thou by al glorified and Praised for thy Mercies to me . Amen .

THE XXX . CONFESSION .

O My Lord God , to and before whom only , I de●ire to powre out my hart , and the desires , affec●tions , and afflictions therof ! For thy owne sake forsake not me who desireth to leaue al for thee . If thou wilt thou can●t saue me . Though I haue neuer to my knowledg done any thing that deserueth any grace , or fauour before thee , yet meerly out of thine owne goodnes forgiue me my sinnes , and haue mercy on me . Let thy Mercy which withou● any desert of mine preuented me , bring me to thee . Let nothing for time , or eternity but thy felf be desired by me . Let not my soul loose , it-self by resting in any thing but thee . Let me take com●ort in hearing of thee ; and let al inordinate loue to creatures be rooted out of my hart by thee . Thou knowst for that which is past , I am hartily sorry , and it often draweth teares from mine eyes to think that their loue should haue been more strong and powerfull in me , then that sweet loue of thine is now , which challengeth so ful , and whole possession of my hart ; and soul by so many titles which none can deny to thee . Take it now therfore wholy to thy-self , and ler me rather cease to be , then to giue any part to any , but as it shall be distributed by thine own sef ; thy friends only shall be mine , that in fine I may haue only thee for my friend aboue all friends ; take from me of them thou giuest me as it best pleases thee . For so I shal come to loue al in thee , ☜ and yet they wil be , as if they were not , as to any impediment to my being vnited to thee . Let me without ceasing aspire by loue vnto thee that I may be lifted aboue my self and all created things , so to be pure , and free vnto thee . Amen .

THE XXXI . CONFESSION .

O My Lord , when I remember my innumerable sinnes , it seemeth not much to me that I sustain these things both without and within . But yet my deare God I may speak to thee ( in the bitternes of my soul ) who art my only refuge , and comfort in affliction , and say , that thou seemest to me to shut vp al hope of meanes to help my self , by some things which I already do , and more am like heerafter to sustain ; Of whom should I beg help but of thee , or strength to beare this to thy honour with con●ormity to thy blessed wil ? Who can bestow this on me but thy-self ? Thou knowst that since I gaue my-sef to a serious tending to thee , ☞ I neuer desired the friendship or fauour of any creature liuing . Nay , ( to thy honour I speak it ) thou many times , and seueral ways shewed me so plainly the vncertain●y , instability , and changeablenes of al created things , that my soul euen loatheth the fauour of any how good soeuer , neither do I wonder to see those whom to day vpon occasion I am resolute I may be confident in , to morrow be in an humor of interpreting al I haue done , or said in another sense then indeed I meant it . This indeed thou permittest to the end we may trust in thee alone , adhere to thee alone , and for to purge our souls of the interest , which nature getteth euen in the actions which we do with best intention . Thou know●t I nei●her desire nor pretend any thing , but do wish with al my soul that thy Wil be perfectly accomplished , and take this answer from thee ( which I shal anone recite ) when I am too ●olicitous of my own good , or too much troubled with the preiudice , or affliction of those thy sernants with whom I ( most vn●orthy ●inner ) liue , who are in thee al without exception most dearly beloued by me , with this answer following of thine , I am ( I say ) put in mind of my dury , where thou saiest ; Quid ad ●e ? tu me sequere ; Io 21. 22. What is that to thee , do thou follow me ; And I answer thee my Lord , that as for me , it is good for me to adhere to thee , who art that One thing , which is only necessary . Thou alone suffisest me , and al things bu● thy-self shal be to me , as if they were not , that I may ●ind and enioy thee , a●ter whom my soul doth pant and sigh without ceasing , longing after t●ee with all my forces , who art my al and only good . No rhirst in any though neuer so weary and tired , can be so great for want of that which naturally quencheth our thirst when we pant , and are dry with heat and thirst , as is the thirst which my soul doth sustain sighing , and panting after thee the liuing fountain , which yet I cannot enioy , til my soul be set free from this corruptible flesh , but the more I sigh , the more I am delighted to sigh after thee , whom● I would so fain enioy , The more I loue , the more I am yet able farther to loue thee ; the more I deny my-self , the mor● sweet it be . cometh to me to suffer for thee the only beloued of my soul. Wo is me that euer I offended such a good●nes as art thou my God! Certainly my sinns deserue to be punished in an extraordinary maner , becaus I committed them more wilfully then ordinary . Such was the carefulnes of thy seruant my natural father , who was so careful that I should be kept out of al occasions of sin , that I might ( considering the nature also which thou gauest me ) haue liued very innocently ; But what through my greater fault , and negligence is due to me for my sinns , be , it supplyed by the superaboundance of thy Mercy , which I will from hence●orth with all my forces extol ; and I beseech thee remember thy true seruant my said Father , who through his care preuented my further euil ; V. F. Baker and also I offer to ●hee him whose happy instructions hath made thy yoke s● s●eet , and thy burthen so light to me , who as thou knowst found it so greiuous and heauy before I took my instructions from him , that I was weary of the yoke , and despaired euer to beare thy burthen with any comfort or quiet , whereas afterward being put into a course of Praier and Mortificatiō by h●m , my greatest obligations seemed to be most most desirable burthens , for al thy benefits be thou by al praised for euer . Amen .

THE XXXII . CONFESSION .

MAy I aske thy Maiesty this question , being not worthy so much as to name or think vpon thee ; May I ( I say ) aske thee , how it is possible that thou canst find in thy hart thus to heap benefits vpon the most vnworthy , vngreatful , and contemptible of al thy creatures ? Is there any sin that I haue not comitted , at least by my wil ? Yea verily so great , and numberles do my ●ins , and imperfections appeare to me that I neuer read , or heard of any , whose sinnes ( for one reason , or other ) could be compared to mine . Shal not therefor my soul praise my God ? Can any wonder to see me in al occasions fly to thee , and speak to thee , wh● hast without any the least desert on my part thus sweetly with thy Grace pr●uented me , and not only auerted my wil from al that displeaseth thee , but also drawn me so forcible to desire only thee , that my soul euen loatheth al that may any way hinder it from truly adhering to thee ; and such an inclination hath my wil continually towards th●e , that it cannot endure to rest in any thing but thee alone ; I would haue thee alone ; I desir to loue ; and seeke thee , esteeming al gifts , ☜ and graces so much , and no more , as they may and do enable me to rest only in the● which grant I may euer do for thy owne sake , who art Godnes it self , and who be euer blessed ; Amen .

THE XXXIII . CONFESSION .

O Thou who despisest not any in greif , and misery flying to thee ; hear and help me in that which is sustained by me , to whom should I fly but to thee ? If I had or desired to haue any friends besids thee , thou mightst bid me go vnto them , and speak to them to help me , But as it is , al hauing forsaken me , and I al for th●e ; behold I come vnto thee , not as one , who thinketh herself any way to deserue to be beheld , or heard of thee , but as one who hath no other refuge besids thee . Thy mercy , which infinity surpasses my sinns , inuiteth me howrly to come confidently to thee ; These therefor are thy words , with which thou art most willing to be challenged by thy poor seruants , who by reason of their great frailty and weaknes may alleadg them in their necessities and want of help in whic● they are , to thee I say who speake●● them for our help and comfort ; No● vos relinquam orpha●os ; Petite & ac●pietis , vt gaudium vestrum sit plenu● Paraclitus docebit vos omnia . Io 14. 18. Si quis ●i●ligit me , sermonem meum seruabit , & ●at●r meus diliget eum , & ad cum v●niemus , & mansionem apud eum fac●mus . I wil not leaue you orphans ; A● and you shal receiue , that your joy may ●ful . The Holy Ghost wil teach you ● things . If any loue me he wil keep m● word , and my Father wil loue him , and ● wil come to him , and wil make our mansion with him : If thou wilt be our Father what cause haue we to complain though we be despised , and forsaken , yea and traoden down by the whole world ? But as for me I shal neuer be weary of saying ; it is good to adhere to my Lord God ; This I wil ask ; this I wil beg euen for thy own Jake , that thou wilt be my helper , defender , and refuge in al my necessities , and do not for euer ●orsak her who is so poor , and frail of her-sef , that she hath nothing of her own doing , or suffering wherein she can glory , or confide . If thou wilt not forsake me , I shal be sa●e ; If thou leaue me to my-self , nothing can I expect , but vtterly to perish . Let me obserue al thou exacteth of me , out of pure and sincere loue neither desiring , ☜ no nor so much , as reflecting vpon other reward , then that I may be so happy , as in al things to be conformable to thy holy wil. It is a sufficient comfort euen of it-self , to be tyed , and bound to thee by the obligation of vows , and to serue thee for loue , and to endeauourin al to be so subiect to thee , as if it were not in our power to wil , or desire any thing whatsoeuer . In this lyeth hidden a most sweet , and peaceable life , euen amidst the various changes and alterations which this our banishment daily experienceth , which is truly tearmed a warfare ; in which sometimes we ouercome by thy assisting grace , and sometimes we are vāquished by our enemies the world● the flesh , and the diuel , the which giues vs occasion to acknowledg iustly before thee daily our exceeding great frailty . But this in my daily combats is my comfor● , that my Lord and loue , my only beloued and most dearly desired Lord my God , a●ter whom I thirst , and languish , seeth and beholdeth me , and is nee● to be called vpon in this my necessity . For as he loueth those that fight with great couradg , and strength , so he despiseth not his litle children , to whom gnats and flyes seeme so great enemies ( for so I may tearm my litle sufferings if I compare them to those of his strong and faihful seruants , which without changing their countenance they most couradgiously endure , yea euen before my face ) that we weep and hide our faces in his boosom , to auoid the biting , and stinging of so smal aduersities . This , my God , is my case ; help , and assist me that I may be daily more strengthened , and confirmed in thee , that at last I may be that in al things thou wouldst haue me ●o be . Amen .

THE XXXIV . CONFESSION .

BEatus homo quem tu erudieris Domine , & de lege tua docueris eum . Psal. 93 1● , 17. Nisi quia Dominus adiuuit me , paulo minus habitasset in inferno anima mea . Blessed is the man , whom thou shalt teach O Lord , and shalt instruct him in thy law ? Vnles God had helped me within very little my soul had dwelt in hel . This is my solace in sorrows , and my refreshment in labours to cal vpon my God and to write vnto him , so that when my soul groweth more heauy , and dul , I may in that case read in my own writing● as in a book , the mercies of my Lord shewed vnto me , therby to raise vp my soul to a sweeter remembrance of him , whom my hart desire thin al and aboue al to loue , and enioy . We may I confes being taught this my lesson by thee , that if thou hadst not most powerfully holpen and deliuered me my soul had dwelt in hel● where it might most iustly haue no● been , if thy meere Mercy had not hetherto deliuered me , which continue to do , my Lord , I most humbly beseech thee . For as it is said in the Psalme , vnles thou O Lord , keep my soul , in vain is my labour in defending it . Who therfor can blame me flying vnto thee , or for hauing in al things relation to my God my mercy so that if I at any time grow slack in flying to him , or in calling vpon hi● in my doubts and miseries , this which I now write lying by me , and often being looked vpon by me , may be a meanes to put me in mind of his former mercy , which hath been so great to me , that it cannot po●●ibly be expressed ; and whatsoeuer heerafter becometh of me , be the fault wholy attributed to me ; for nothing hath my Lord God left vndon , which might win me wholy to himself , and make me despise my self and al created things for his loue . For when I sinned , he recalled me , and forsook me not in that my misery of offending such an infinit goodnes , so shamefully , and that also after my entry into Religion , the happines and worth whereof I did not yet know by which meanes I grew weary of bearing therein his sweet yoke and light burthen , the which is heauy only through our fault , and not of it-self . Through which default , and ignorance of mine it grew so greiuous and intolerable to me , that I wished often it might haue been shaken of lawfully by me , pretending it was so incompatible with my good , that I could scarsly work my saluation in this my state and Profession . This , my God thou art witnes of is true , ☞ and so it did continue with me aboue two years after I had in shew forsaken the world , and the world , indeed forsaken me , but did my Lord in these biter afflictions forsake me ? No , no , but he prouided such a help for me by meanes of a faithful seruant of his that quikly was my sorrow turned into ioy , yea into such an vnspeakeable ioy , that it hath sweetned al the sorrows which since that time haue befaln me . For as soon as my soul was set in a way of tending to my God by Praier , and Ab●egation , I found al my miseries pre●ently disperse themselues and come to nothing ; yea euen in fiue weeks my soul became so enamoured with the yoke of this my deare Lord , that if I must haue made not only foure , but foure thousands vowes to haue become wholy dedicated to him , ☞ I should haue embraced this state with more ioy , and content , then euer I did find in obtaining that which euer I most of al wished , or desired ; yea and as thou knowst my God , by my souls being put into a cours of prayer , I seemed to haue now found a true means wherby I might loue without end , or measure , and that without any peril , or danger . For who can loue thee , ☜ my God , too much ? O let me melt wholy into loue , to record these thy most aboundant Mercies ? Let me neuer be weary of singing thy Praise , who thus hast inuited and drawn me ( euen whither I would or no ) to a perfect contempt of al created things , that I may adhere to thee aboue al gifts whatsoeuer . This I do so particularly write down , becaus my frailty is so great , that I may perhaps grow vnmindful of thee , notwithstanding al this that thou hast done for me , which I beseech thee for thine own sake neuer permit me to be , that I may praise and loue thee without ceasing , who art my God blessed for euer and euer . Amen .

THE XXXV . CONFESSION .

Io. 3. 21. QVi facit veritatem● venit ad lucem , vt manifestentur opera eius quae in Deo sunt facta . O Lord what is more amiable , and desirable then Truth . That is it which powerfully preuaileth in all things , and no wonder , seeing thou art Truth . Wel may Truth be oppressed , ☞ thou permitting it , but suppressed it-self can neuer be , becaus as thou saiest , heauen and earth shal fail ; but thy word shal not fail . He that loueth verity , and doth desi● to liue to thee cometh to the light ? And what is this light ? Is it not thy-self my God ? Yes verily . For in thy light only can we see light . By faith we are made capable , or disposed for this light . For as thou saiest ; My iust liueth by faith . Rom. 1.17 . By this light we are strengthned in hope , and inflamed in charity , and by appr●aching to the● , who artour true light and life , we obtain a light which teacheth vs to do our works in thee , and for thee . In his light we discouer our own nothing , ●nd perceiue we are poor , and frail of ●ur-selues aboue al we can imagin , ● conceaue ; and by it we plainly ●●rceaue , that whatsoeuer is wel ●one by vs , is as truly to be attribu●ed to thee , as if it had been don ●ithout any concurrence of ours ●ith thee ; and that it is as iust our ●ill should in al things obey thee , ●nd that without any challenging ●f reward ●or it of thee ( but only so ●r as it is due by thy meere promised ●ercy ) as it is certain , that without ●ee we could neither liue , nor be . ●lso in this lig●t we see in some sort as it were in a looking glasse ) how ●reat , and good a God we haue , and ●●at he is more present to vs then ●e are to our selues , which maketh ●y soul exult and rejoice amidst ●●e troubles , tumults , and various ●hanges which the difficulty of pas●ons , and crosse actions , and the ●●stability of ●uman , and transi●ory things daily and howrly caus 〈◊〉 my soul. For who can mourn for want of a friend , who hath her only friend always present with her ? ☞ who can choose but hope seeing he is her helper , for whose loue , she fighteth against flesh and bloud , yea and against the power of darknes ? But how doth she fight ? Not as one confiding in her own strength , but in his help , whose loue hath made her proclaim warre with al that would hinder her from being true to this her only beloued . To those that loue , what can be wanting , seeing loue is able to sweeten al labours , and lighten al burthens ? As for me therfor I wil sing without ceasing in my hart ; It is good for me to adhere to my God , and to put my whole trust in him , Psal. 72. For vain is the help of man . After him I will sigh ; to him I wil sing . For my offences I wil weepe , and humble my self at the feet ef al creatures , becaus nothing pleaseth him so wel , as humibity ; and I wil approach to my God , and walk solicitous with him ; Of him I wil write , and I wil not depart from him● least darknes , and the shadow of death do apprehend my sinfull foul . He shal be my God , who am his vnworthiest creature , that so no euil may haue power ouer me . I wil long , my Lord , to be dissolued , and that I may more fully , and perfectly enioy the● , and neuer any more offend thee , who art so worthy of al Praise , Glory , Honour , and Adoration for euer . Amen .

THE XXXVI . CONFESSION .

O My Lord , to thee I wil speak , to whom yet the secrets of my hart are otherwise most cleerly , manifest ; To thee I wil speak , and vpon thee I wil cal . If thou wilt my Lord thou canst saue me . This day my Lord God ; it is read of thee in rhe holy Church , Mat. 9.3 . that thou didst heale the man sick of the Palsey . Let me also find grace before thee , that my diseases may by thee be cured , that so I may become pleasing to thee . For the diseases of the mind in which I languish are much more grieuous then those of the body . For these make vs but vngratful to men , but the other make vs displeasing in thine eyes . But thy goodnes as it is seene in this example together with the cure of the one , did also vse to grant pardon for the other . For thou didst say to him ; Thy sins are fo●giuen thee ; by w●ich he became cured in body , and soul. This thy mercy I remember with great ioy , and comfort , and falling down at thy feet my Lord , I beg of thee , that thou wilt be merciful to me a sinner for thy own sake , and say vnto my soul ; Thy sinnes are forgiuen t●ee ; and grant that I may now begin to liue to thee , that so by thy grace al impediments may be remoued , which hinder me from louing thee , as thou wouldst be loued by me , whic● is al I wish , or desire . To this end , I fly to thee ; to this end I sigh after thee , only wishing and desiirng that in al things , thy holy wil may be perfectly● accomplished in me for time , and eternity . If I should not howrly approach to thee , who art the only true light , darknes , and the shadow of death would ouerwhelm me , and make me vncapable of this thy light , which leadeth to the true loue of thee . O how happy were I , if I could truly say ; Anima mea in manibus meis semper , My soul in my hands always , that so my soul might truly hear , and follow what my Lord speaketh to my hart For thy words ate works ! O giue me a true contempt of my●sef , that I may dy to al that the world esteemeth , or desireth ! For I find where I seek my self , there I am caught as it were in a snare , and where I for●ake my self , there I become more , and more capable of that true liberty of spirit , which carrieth the soul aboue it self and al created things , that i● may more perfectly be vnited to thee . For this is thy wil , that by true Abnegation in al things both external , and internal , and by a total subiection to thee , both as concerning our selues and al others in any thing that can be wished by vs , we should enioy a certain diuine heauenly peace amidst the crosses , passiôs , contradictions , andmutabilities which are incident to our life in this warfare of ours . For the more sound a soul is in the practise of this doctrin of thine , ☞ of denying herself in al , and following thee by proposing no other end to her self in any thing , but thy self alone , ☞ the more she getteth , as I may say , her soul into her hands , and the lesse she is moued in al things that happen either without her , or within her . For she seeth , and knoweth that such haue euer been thy practise , and permissions about crosses , and difficulties falling vpon souls , which was and is , with and for this intention of thine , that they of necessity must suffer , and therby become disposed and in some sort worthy for to enter into thy Kingdom ; Neither doth the soul that attendeth to thee wonder at crosse accidents nor at the wayes , or meanes by which they fal vpon her , but in al of them she confideth in thee , that they shal al turn to her greatest good . And as for the faults which she comitteth , she humbleth herself , hoping stil more and more in thy merci●ful forgiuenes , and assistance . It is not strange to her to see so many and different opinions of al men concerning the vse of matters and things that of themselues are indifferent ; but remembring that as S. Paul saith ; Rom. 1 ●● . 5. Euery man aboundeth in his own sense , she adhereth to thee , who art stil the same , and hath relation to thee in al she doth or omitteth ; By which meanes thou teachest her ( seeking simply thine honour in al things ) where , when , in what maner , ☜ and of whom she shal ask in doubtful cases . For it is al one to her , O my God ( If thou require it ) to be resolued by another , or by thy●self ; But indeed in the way of Abnegation questions are rare , ☜ and to go forth questioning without thy sending , is but a meere immortification , and doth intangle the soul , and bring her into inconueniences incomprehensible ; and for such doing , when we so do , we cannot passe without a bitter check for it in our int●rior by thy diuine Maiesty , as thou knowst , my good Lord , my soul hath experienced . For those souls that thou leadest by the way of loue of them I say , thou exactest , that they should make their moane , only to thee , thou hauing as it were giuen them a pledge that thou wilt become al in al , and aboue al to them , if they wil but remain faith●ul to thee . Also they so litle desire or esteem any graces , comforts , or fauours which can be granted , ☞ or bestowed vpon them ( but only so far as they are meerly necessary to maintain them in grace , and fauour in thee , and only as they are thought fit for them by thee ( whom they de●ire to be gratful to for al thy benefits ) that they neuer desire them , but wish rather to adhere to thee by pure faith , ☞ that they may become therby the more deare and pleasing to thee . For a as , my Lord God , what is al thou canst giue to a louing soul who sigheth and panteth after thee alone , and esteemeth al things as dung , that she may gain thee ? What is al , I say , whilst thou giuest not thy-f●lf , who art that one thing which is only necessary and which alone can satisfy our souls . Was it any comfort to St Mary Magdalen , when she sought the● , to find two Angels , which presented themselues insteed of tbee ? verily , I cannot think it was any ioy vnto her . For that soul that hath set her whole loue and desire on thee , can neuer find any true satisfaction , but only in thee . Yea comforts granted by thee make the soul become affraid , least th●t by them she should the less ●a thfully serue thee ; and so far as it may stand with thy wil , considering my extraordinary frailty , I had rather serue thee without consolation , then to find , or feel that which may make me esteeme any thing of my self , or hinder me from resting only in thee , who ar● my God , and al my desire for euer . Amen .

THE XXXVII . CONFESSION .

THis day , my L●rd , it is read in the Gospel of our Office , that thou didst send thy seruants into the lanes for the poor , lame , blind , and deformed , to cōpel them to en●ter and tast of thy supper , the which thy Mercy did so particularly extend it self to me , that with great ioy and comfort I heare it read , and with exceeding desire of gratitude , I recount it heer in the sight of thy diuine Maiesty . For first , who could be more deformed in body and soul then I ? and yet thou didst not despise me ; and Secondly , who could haue less desir to enter into holy Religion , which is the place where we may most aboundantly tast and see , how sweet our Lord is , then my frozen and stupid soul ? And yet thy Goodnes compelled me to enter . O who wil giue me power , and ability sufficiently to extol thy most a boundant Mercy , which in this and al other things thy sweet Goodnes hath shewed towards me ! Blessed infinitly be my Lord by al his creatures , My only study shal be to praise thee , and my only desir that I may be faithful in al crosses , and miseries to thee my only beloued . Let thy Grace flow I beseech thee vpon thy seruant , who with so much care , paines , and solicitud , for thy sake endeauoured to win my hart wholy to thee . Remember him vnto good according to al he hath done for me ; V F. Baker He hath truly made me to see and feel ( though through my great fault , and ignorance I before thought otherwise ) that thy yoke is sweet and thy burthen light , which now I shal al●o being conuinced by experience , acknowledge before heauen and earth to thine honour and my confusion , who durst presume to think otherwise . Pardon , I beseech thee therefor for thin● own sake , this my sinne among the rest which are innumerable ; and let me heerafter be a true seruant and child of thine , ●ho be blessed by al , for euer , and euer . Amen .

THE XXXVIII . CONFESSION

1 Thes. 5. 17. SEmper gaudete , sine intermissione orate . Always reioyce , Pray without ceasing . O my Lord and my God ; They that truly loue thee , may indeed iustly always rejoyce , and without intermission praise thee ! But I that daily and ●owrly offend thy diuino Maiesty ought to weep and lament my sins bitterly , sitting solitary and making my moane to thee my God , who art only able to help and comfort me in this misery .

O when shal I become truly humble ! Teach me Humility , Obedience , and Patience , enlighten my soul , obscured by my pride , and other sins , that I may loue thy Law , and humbly embrace thy blessed wil in al things . O let me be truly subiect to thee , as thou wouldst haue me , and euen to al others also● as it is exacted by thee of me ! Wo be to my soul , if daily it become not more and more obedient ro t●ee , and to others for thee . Giue me true Discretion . For no vertue hath more of vertue in it , then it partaketh o● this diuine vertue . Giue me true Wisedom , which maketh souls so pleasing to thee , and which thou impartest to the humble , and those that serue thee for loue , and that seek thee aboue al gifts and created things whatsoeuer . O loue , loue , flow into my soul , that I may sigh and pant after my God alone , and praise this my beloued for al eternity . Amen .

THE XXXIX . CONFESSION .

O Deus meus , quis similis tibi ! O my God who is like to thee ! Who wil giue m● that wi●hout ceasing● may adhere to thee , and with an amourous aspect , regard thee in al things , not seeking my-self nor the pleasing of any creature for it self , in any thing I , do or omit ?

Ier. 12 11. Desolatione desolata est omnis terra ; quia nullus est qui recogiter corde . With desolation al the land is made desolate , Because there is none who considereth in the hart . O my God , what wonder is it that we liue in blindnes , if we come not to thee who art the only true lig●t ? What do we with souls , and harts capable of loue , if we do not by them aspire to thee , with al our strength , and adhere to thee , the only true and perfect good ? What is sweet , what is to be desired , but thee , my Lord , who art beawty it self ? What couldst thou do more then make out souls to thine own image and liknes , and able ●o be satisfied with nothing but thy self ? O misery , of al miseries the greatest , that thou shouldst be offended , and forgotten by vs , and that any thing should posses our souls besids thy loue , which only can make vs happy , and pleasing in thine eyes . Wo is me , who haue straied from the fountain of liuing water , by which my ●oul is dryed vp , and euen withereth away in thirst after transitory things . Change this my thirst by thy●weet ●weet grace and Mercy to a thirsting after thee my God , the glory of my hart , and the peace and comfort of my soul. O let me loue , or not liue ; and let me in al , by al , and aboue al praise thee , who art ble●sed for al eternity . Amen .

THE XL. CONFESSION .

MY soul blesse thou our Lord , and al things within me his holy name . Psal. 102. 1. Al spirits praise my God , for euer and euer magnify him .

I wil declare to thee my God in al things , how it stands with me , that I may hope and be strengthened in and by thee . I wil beg what is nece●sary for me to please and serue thee . For what canst thou deny to them , who haue no hope or comfort , but only in thee . He who giueth himself , giueth al ; and when thou deniest what we ask , it is that thou mayst giue t●● own self more fully to vs thy poor seruants , and that impediments may be the more truly remoued between our souls and thee .

Simplify my soul that it may return to thee ; adorn me with ●●ine own merits , that I may not appeare naked of good bef●re thee , and supply my defect in praising and lou●ng thee . To thee my God , al my interior powers shal aspire day , and night without ceasing . Let me draw no breath but therby to sigh and pant after thee the liuing fountain . Let al actions which by Obedience , or necessity be imposed on me , be vndertaken , and done by me with an in●erior regard of thee , that I may truly in them obey and seek thee , the most amiable beloued of my hart and soul ; let them be as a cessation , or pausing for the time , that I may afterward with the more force and sauour at times conuenient attend to thee in the bottom of my soul , and therein praise thee . Amen .

THE XLI . CONFESSION .

COme al ye that haue vowed your bodies , and souls to our Lord , Come let vs loue . Let vs giue al not only once , but euery moment to him , that made vs to bestow on vs himself . Let vs not only loue , but be wholy transformed into the ●iuine loue . Let vs liue to him ●lone , leauing al others for his sake only . Let vs charitably interpret the words and deeds of those with whom we liue ; and if any fa●l in that which he ought to perform , giue vs grace , my God , ☜ to remembe● how weak human nature is for good , and how great is our frailty as to a sin , and how soon we also ( if thou didst not protect vs ) might fail in a more shameful maner . O my God , thou hast commaunded vs to loue our neighbour as our self , and behold we either , loue them inordinatly to our impediment of louing thee , or els we are short towards them of ●rue Charity . From both these errours deliuer the soul of thy poor seruant , and grant me to loue al as t●ou wouldst haue me . Let no difficulties they cause to me , make me in them the less to behold and consider thee . Verily , if there were no other reward to be giuen to those who for thy sake requite euil with good , then the true peace which they find in their souls by it , it were most worthy our labour . But thou , my Lord , reseruest great reward in the next life for those , who for bitternes caused to them by others , do return sweetnes vnto ●hem ; yea nothing is more pleasing , and acceptable to thee , then that we by humility and patience do pacify those who are offended with vs . But alas my God , I wil speak , and wil not be silent in the eares of my Lord , and with teares in mine eyes wil bewail my sins , and offences . I ●now there is no more true loue in our souls to our neighbours , then we are dead to our selues , and liue vnto thee . What therefor can I think of my poor soul , so barrein of al true vertue ? If I loue thy very-self so little , as indeed I do , where wilt thou●ind ●ind in me , that Charity which by thy law I owe for thee towards them ? Verily , when I consider how destitute I am of al that might make , me pleasing in thine eyes , I cannot but tremble , and fear . Yet again taking hart , remembring thy Mercy towards me , I find I haue cause of hope , thou being goodnes itself , whose nature is to desir to impart it-self ; which if thou wilt be pleased to do to my poor soul , I shal notwithstanding al my sins become yet in thee and by thee most happy ; towards which I beseech thee grant me grace to dispose my-self for thy only honour , who be Blessed for euer . Amen .

THE XLII . CONFESSION .

O Lord my God , what Mercy art thou pleased to shew to my sinful soul ? Is it possible after so many abominable offēces that thou shoudst thus particularly fauour me ? If it were euer possible to be lawful for thy creatures to exclaim against thee and taxe thee o● iniustice , it might be admitted them in this thou hast done and doest ●or me , the most sinnful and most contemptible of al thy Maiesties creatures . If ● had euer don● any good they perhaps would not wonder at the● ; but as it is , the● cannot but at least admire thy infinit sweetnes and Mercy . For what sin is there I haue not comitted , at least by my wil. But the greater thy Merc● the more I hope the honou● and praise wil be which thy seruan● wil yeild to t●ee for it● ; and do th●● thy self , I beseech the● , supply ou● defect in this and al other things , so that perfect praise may be yeilded to thee in al and by al for euer and euer . Amen .

THE XLIII . CONFESSION .

LOrd , with great ioy I desir to celebrat this diuine Solemnity of thy Resurrection . Thou hast shewed thy-self in al formes , so that the weakest capacities might in some sort apprehend thee who art incomprehensible . Thou appearedst a child , that thy little ones might conceiue more easily some things that might moue them to loue thee , and being as it is were astonished at t●y loue towards vs , and at thy infinit humility , we might thirst after thy example , and loue only thee . For al thou hast done , or said , is for our comfort and instruction . What hast thou left vndone , which might any way further our good , if we would but concur with thy Grace ; But we streying from thee , how can we choose but be blind . For only in thy light can we see and discern that which only importeth vs to see and know , to wit , to know thee , therby to loue thee , and to know our-selues , therby to hum●ble vs in al things before thy Diuine Maiesty . For nothing but true Humility can make vs gracious in thine eyes . So much as we truly humble our selues , so much , and no more , do we encrease in our loue to thee . O how peaceful amidst al storms is the souls of the humble ? how fauoured by thee , though they be dispised by the whole world . They are indeed often neglected by men ; but most conuersant with thee and thine Angels and Saints in heauen . Neuer was there euer such acquaintance , loue , and friendship , between any in this world , as there is between thy Goodnes and an humble soul , that seeketh thee aboue al graces and gifts whatsoeuer , and transcendeth al created things , that she may adhere to thee in the bottom of her soul. Verily it is so strange , that it puttet● the heauently Court into admiration , that we that haue dedicated our souls wholy to thee , should loue , seeke , or desir any thing besids thee . But alas human frailty , as they wel know , is very great , and therefor they also cannot choos but pitty and pray for vs ; and especially we women , silly to all things that this ●orld admires , and therefor most contemptible of al creatures , if we do not labour for the loue of thee , ● the which to do , thou dost as willingly enable vs as thou dost the wise of the world , if we hinder not thy grace who despisest not any thing thou hast made . How much are we to be therefor blamed and condemned if we labour not , I say , for thy loue ? ☜ Yea to shew thy power thou hast been pleased many times to bring a silly woman , louing thee , to that wisedom that no creature by wit or industry could attain to the same . But where my Lord haue these thy Spouses in these dayes placed there harts ? Where , I say , seeing they seek , and desir so much the ●auour and praise of the world , to haue the friendship of men , and by letters and to●ens to draw their harts from thee vnto them , notwithstanding ( as good reason ) it prospereth not with vs in such doing ; for they by this meanes seeing our defect in louing thee , cannot confide in them , who are not true to thee ; but contrary compare vs to those , who profer loue to al , and yet , as we ought for thee , loue none . O Lord remoue these scandals from thy Church ; Let vs , though we cannot serue thee , in great matters , yet let vs , I say , haue no ●arts but to loue thee , no tongues but to praise thee , nor eyes but to behold thy creatures , as things inuiting our souls to loue● sigh , pant , and ●uen languish after t●ee ; No eares but to heare what is thy will ; and in fine not to liue but in , and for t●ee , and for thy loue to be subiect to euery human creature , as far as it is exacted of vs by thee . Giue that humility● which by thy blessed Apostle Saint Paul thou requirest in vs , that I may willingly submit my-self to the power of Superiors set ouer me by ●hee . It is true I see and hear daily , ●hat scandals , what discorders , and ●hat confusions arise in Communities for want o● due submission in subiects to their Superiors ; but alas , my God certeinly a chief cause therof is ( at least in many who haue good wils ) becaus thy are not taught to obey t●ee interiorly in their souls , out of which it would proue easy to them to obey exteriorly , wheras now it semes a burthen intolerable ; and forsooth vnder pretence of greater perfection , ☜ we often fal in● to open rebellion . Surely this was not the practise of Saints , who yet sound often great opposition and mortification by meanes of Supe●iors , which they bearing patiently and obeying stil out of an internal●egard ●egard of thee in their souls , al turned to their greater aduancement in ●hy loue ; and their Superiors at last ●y thy help concurred to that which ●hey desired , so far as it was thy wil , who , hast disposed of al things in order and iustice , and nothing can be wel done but that we do out of an internal light from thee and out of obedience to thee , to whom obedience is due in al things whatsoeuer . Thou hast set an order in al things , and euery thing as it is ordained by thee , wil concur to a most heauenly harmony ; but corrupting thy meaning , al things are out of order , and peace on al sides is disturbed . O how happy are they , whose souls are in a right way to hear and follow thy wil , and who do nothing without consulting with thee in their soul , giuing that to God which is only Gods own , and to Caesar that which is due to Caesar for God ? for both these obediences are necessary to make a true spiritual life . For in vaine do we giue to thee , if we deny Obedience to them who are set ouer vs by thee ; and also in vaine is it to please and haue the fauour of our Superiors , if we internally neglec● to haue in al things relation to thee ; from both these errors deliuer me , ☜ I beseech thee , that my soul may be a peaceful habitation for thee . Let me humbly behaue my-self towards al ; and let me not measure my case before thee by the opinion my Superiors and Sisters haue of me , for they may applaud me , and yet it may stand il with me before thee ; and they may take al in another worser sense then thou knowst I meant it , and that iustly , and yet it may go wel between thy goodnes and me through thy abound Mercy .

THE XLIV . CONFESSION .

O How happy are those souls who loue nothing but thee ? Verily there is so little stability in al things but in thee , that it is a strange thing that we should liue so miserable liues thou offering vs a most peaceful and quiet life , if we would but seek thee alone , who art more present to vs , then we are to our selues ; and by thee our soul doth liue , more then our body doth by our soul ; Those that posses thee haue al things , and those who want thee , if they had al the world can afford , do yet indeed posses nothing . If we desire to loue where our loue may not be lost , what shall we loue but thee , wh● hast said ; Io. 15. 9. Sicut dilexit me Pater , & ego dilexi vos ; As my Father loued me , so haue I loued you ; Do we not therefor wel deserue to liue in al perplexity and misery , if we do not leaue to loue al other things to set our whole loues vpon thee , ●ho hast made vs such sweet promises ; yea let vs hear what thou dost further add ; Io. 15. 5. Qui mane● in me , & ego in eo , hic fert fructum multum . Who remaineth in me , and I in him , bringeth forth much fr●ict . O let me be remain in thee , and then let al the world be against me ! I desir not , my God , by any particular fauours in this life to be more certain of thee ; But I do beg of thee , that by true Humility , Obedience , and Patience , I may be more confirmed in thee by true loue , only in simple faith ; ☜ in al desolations , crosses , pains , disgraces , miseries adhering to thee the only desire of my soul , and not resting in any gift or grace of thine whatsoeuer , that I may at last for thy o●n sake find fauour in the eyes of thy Diuine Maiesty , notwirhstanding my sins and ignorances , in which I haue hetherto liued ; for whieh thy mercy o● forgiuing them me , be thou for euer blessed and praised by al thy creatures . Amen . Amen .

THE XLV . CONFESSION .

O Lord , my God , to whom vpon al occasions , I ( most vnworthy ) with thy leaue presume to speak , and ask questions in my simple maner . Open the eyes of my soul , that I may know and vnderstand thy Wil and Law , and Grace to perform them to thine honour . Thou my God , who art more mine , then I am mine own , do not reiect me speaking and writing to thee . For what do I desir , or wish but thee ? Or what are al things to me without thee ? Surely , nothing . For thou hast shewed me through thy sweet mercy● and grace without any desert of mine own , that al things are vanity but to loue and please thee , which I beseech thee that I may do with al the forces of my hart , and soul. For truly there is no true peace , or comfort out of thee . Let me therefor know my-self and know thee , that in al I may praise and please thee . Amen .

THE XLVI . CONFESSION .

Io. 20. LORD it is read to day of thee that Saint Mary Magdalen approaching to kis thy feet , it would not be admitted her by thee . If it may please thee , I wil humbly aske of thee the meaning of this . For I am somewhat amazed at it . For when she came to thy feet loaden with many and greiuous sins , thou admitted●● her most easily ; and when she had a long time been trained vp in thy happy school of Perfection , and had accompanied thee in thy Passion , and mourned for thee at thy tomb , taking no rest til thou her beloued returned to her again ; and besids she offered to haue taken thee away from al the world , if they would haue but told her where they had laid thee ; and yet dost thou now deny her to touch and kis thy blessed feet . What , shal we think she loued thee less now then when she first desired to loue thee ? Or shal we think , that as her loue grew more , and more to thee , thine grew less and less to her ? No , God forbid I should euer admit of such a thought ; But , O my Lord , thou being ●isedom it-self , intendedst to bring this great and ardent louer to a loue more spiritual , then that with which she loued thee when t●ou conuersedst with her before thy death and Passion . For it is thy custom with great mildnes to receaue sinners , and when they grow more strong in loue thou seemest to treat them with more seuerity , that they at first may hope in thee , and go forward in thy loue and seruice , and that after being a litle strengthned with light and comfort from thee , thou mayst try them many ways , least they should attribut that which they haue done to their own forces , and that fauour which they haue receaed , to their own labours , and deserts ; which thou knowst we are very apt to do , if thou didst not through permitting vs to fal into temptation , shew vs our own frailty . But this blessed Saint ( whose intercession I most humbly implore for thy sake , whom now none can depriue her of ) did not think that by denying her to touch t●y feet she receaued wrong . For her humble soul thought it-self too vnworthy of such a fauour , when thou didst put her in mind , that she was to conuers with thee in a more spiritual maner then before ; neither did she reflect on the labour , pain and grief she had sustained . For , as thou knowst , loue feeleth no labour , nor complaineth of any burthen . For only to haue seen thee aliue again , was sufficient to make her forget al former afflictions . For her sake , and for al their sakes that loue thee , be merciful to my sins , and bring me by true loue to be vnited to thee with them , where for euer without ceasing I may praise thee my only beloued . Amen .

THE XLVII . CONFESSION .

O LORD , my God ; I wil speak to thee again , and again I wil cal vpon thee the entierly beloued of my hart I wil melt away in thy praises , and I wil inuite al thy spouses to to seek thee alone aboue al thy gi●ts and aboue al creatures . For in thee alone is true peaee , and comfort to be found , and enjoyed . O how happy should I esteem my self , if I were able to praise thee without ceasing , or be any cause that any should more and more languish with thy loue . What should I do being born down with the weight of mortal flesh , and diuers internal afflictions , so that I can many times scarsly think on thee ? What should I do ( I say● but li●t vp my hart , with my hands as it were by main force , sometimes by words , and sometimes by writing vnto thee , which I do not do as to one that is farr of from me , ☞ but as to one who is more neere to me then I am to my-self , and of whose Goodnes , whose Wisedom , wh●se Beawty , whose Mercy , and most absolut and incomparable greatnes , I am more assured of , then I am of any thing I see with my corporal eyes . O who would not loue this Go●nes , this Maiesty , and submit them-selues ●o this most amiable beloued o● our souls ? If any comfort , or happines were to be found out of him , we were somthing excusable in neg●ecting and forgetting our chief good ; ●ut seeing we cannot euen in this mortal li●e find any content , but by louing , praising , and truly seeking and seruing him , we are too miserable and too blame for loosing our-selues by resting with loue and inordinat affection in transitory and visible things ? O far be it from thy spouses to set their affection vpon any thing b●● thee , or to bereaue thee of the affection which from al is to thee only due . Al that we , are and haue , is too little for thee ; Let vs not therefor of that little we haue , take from thee ! O let vs loue thee aboue al , and al others in and ●or thee . I do bemoan this misery aboue al miseries , that those who haue dedicated themselues to thee , should seek the loue and fauour of others , to their own and the others impediment in thy loue and seruice . O●tentimes we comply and correspond vnder pretence to get temporal means , the while neglecting thee , ☜ who feedest the birds and clothest the beasts of the earth , who neither sow , not reap , neither are they solicitous of any thing but depend of thy meere prouidence , and yet thou prouidest for them Can we think thou wilt haue less care of vs that haue left al the world for thee , then of the vnreasonnable creatues made only for our seruices ? Hast not thou said by the Spirit of al truth , that first seek for the Kingdom of God , and his iustice , al things els s●al be added to you ? Mat. 6.33 . O let vs therefor leaue al things truly , that we may confide in thee , casting our care vpon thee , who wilt nouris● our souls , and bodies , if we wil but faithfully and constantly adhere vnto thee our supreame and only Good . Let vs leaue pretending any thing , but thee . For often euen vnder the pretence of getting praiers of others , we poure out our-selues , in the meane time , neglecting to haue relation to thee , who wouldst more willingly giue , then we could ask , if we would but truly , and faithfully adhere to thee , and not stray out of our selues , hindering both our selues , and others from adhering to thee , to whom we owe al we are , and can do , and and therefor are greatly to blame , when we do not endeauour to loue thee with al our soul , with al our mind and al our strength , which grant for thy own sake we may endeauour to do , to thy honour and glory , who be praised , loued , and adored for al eternity . Amen .

THE XLVIII . CONFESSION .

SHAL not my soul be subiect to God ? O my Lord , far be it from me to wil , or desire any thing but according to thy diuine wil , which is only holy ; Let me neuer resist thy wil , signified to me by any means whatsoeuer . Let my soul be wholy turned into a flame of diuine loue , that I may aspire and tend to nothing els but thy-self alone ; Blot out my sins that my soul may return to thee by loue , from whom by sin it hath strayed ! O let nothing but this desir of thee , my God , posses my hart ; Let that be my solace in labours , pains , temptations , desolations , and al afflictions of body , or mind ! Let not my hart ( drawn by thee to seek after nothing but loue ) be so base as to couet , desir , and rest in any thing but thee . Thou art my life , my choice , and my only beloued . When I hear the● but named , my Lord God , it forcible draweth me into my-self , that I may attend vnto thee , forgetting my-self , and whatsoeuer els besids thee , for which benefit be thou in●initly prais●d . Amen .

THE XLIX . CONFESSION .

Psal. 150. OMNIS ●piritus l●udet Dominum . Bonedicite omnia opera Domini Domino ; Dan. 3.37 . laudate & super exaltate eum in saeoula . Let euery spirit praise our Lord● ; Blesse our Lord al the works of o●● Lord , praise and exalt him for euer . O my God that I were able with a pure soul and louing hart to extol thy praise . But alas , Eccli. 15. 9. thy praise is not seemly in the mouth of a sinner . But shal I for this hold my peace ? If I do , yet permit me this comfort for thine own sake , that I may inuite others more worthy , to sing and set forth the praise of thy diuine Maiesty , with whom yet as the last , and least , my soul shal ioin in the praise of thee our deare Creator ; and in that which is so worthily possessed by thy sweet Goodnes● I wil rejoice with al the forces of my hart and soul ! O my holy and deare delight , what a most harmonious melody would refound ouer al the earth , if thy wil , and iust disposition took place in al things . Behold al thy works praise thee , euery one in their kind ; only man for whose help and comfort al other things on ●arth were created ) ● peruerteth the order of thy Iustice , by mi●u●ing that noble free wil , which thou gauest him , to choose , and loue thee with ! O what couldst thou haue done more , then with such a noble gift to haue endued vs ! Certeinly if we would intend thee in al , and haue relation to thee in al , who art more present to our souls , then we are to our selues , we should hear thee giuing answers , sometimes by others , sometimes by thy self , and sometimes by t●e words of holy Scriptures , and ancient Fathers ; and subiects would be tractable to Superiors rather gouerning by thee then by themselues ; what tho● wouldst commaund , they would commend ; and in al not seeking their own glory or exaltation , would glory in thee , not in their own power● and what were done by thee , they would then accompt only wel done● but what they did o● themselues they would accompt little profitable , ☞ as to the aduancement o● souls Then they would be able to se wha● were fit for euery soul vnde● thei● chardg , and when thou permitted● this not to be so cleer to them , the● would humble themselues acknow●ledging it happened for their vn●wo●thines , beseeching thee to do tha● by thy-self which could not be done by them ; and if thon shouldst perhaps let another ( though their subiect ) to see and discern what were fit in that case , or cases though he were but the last and lowest , and of the least esteeme in the Conuent , yet certeinly such Superiors would not accompt it to derogate from their authorit● , that such an one should supply their place , and Offifice vpon occasions ; becaus they seek thy honour , and not their own ; and though thou hadst giuen them power to command , yet no otherwise would they vse it , then according to such maner and in such cases as thou dost require they should ; In this maner gouerning with relation to thee and regard of thy wil , and with indifferency what thou wilt do by them , what by others , and what by thy-self , whose spirit breatheth where it pleases . Io. 3. 8. Then the sensual loue , and friendship between the Superiors and their subiects would cease ; then sincerity , and reason would take place both in the commander , and in the obeyer , both thinking al their loue and labour to be too little for thy Godnes ; then would be peace on al sids , ☞ and the imperfections of al , would turn to the aduancement , not to the preiudice of any ; then as they desired the friendship , or fauour of none , but in al things willingly and gladly depending of thy prouidence , so they would be friends with al thy friends , and pitty , and pray for ( from the bottom of their souls ) those that are thine enemies , amongst which they ●ould verrly beleeue they should haue been the greatest ; if thou of thy sweet Mercy hadst not preuented them . Also inferiors that truly liue to thee and desiring nothing els but thee , though thou didst teach , and instruct them about the vse of indifferent things by an internal lig●t which discerneth between custome and true reason , between their natural desirs and thy true Iustice , which only ought to take place in al things , yet they accounting themselues wholy vnworthy of being instructed by thee , most willingly hear thy wil and commaunds , not only from Superiors , but from any creature whatsoeuer , accounting it sufficient for them that it was signified to them , that it was thy wil , the which we ought to follow as doth a shaddow the the body , or els of little worth is any thing we do . For thou rewardest no works but thine own . O if al creatures would serue thee according to their capacities and ●tates , what a resemblance would this life haue with heauen ! No person , no state can pretend to be excused from being able to serue and plea●e thee , who hast made our hart for thy-self , and it can neuer haue true rest and repose but in thee the Center o● our souls . What creature is so little or contemptible that doth not in some sort inuite vs in its kind to loue and praise thee my Lord God ? If we would l●ue thee , they would not fail to serue vs , til we could serue thee without them . But alas as it is affirmed , and that most truly , tha● order is the life of things , so man being out of order by seeking himsel● more then thee , and by doing that which may redound rather to his own honour then to thine , hath made al thy other creatures refuse that obedience which they owed to man , if tat he were truly obedient to thee . Our defect in this towards thee puts al out of order . For how can subiects be pliable to the wil of Superiors , if first they be not in the way of obeying thee wit● relation of their obediences to man as to thee and meerly for an according to thy ●il ? And how can we b● at peace with others , i● first we b● not by true resignation in a way t● haue peace with thee in our own souls● Where is the Obedience due to thee and others for ●hee , since oftentime● out of blindnes we giue Caesar tha● which was Gods , and deny to him that which was due to him by the 〈◊〉 of God ? As also if Superiors an● Priests should stand vpon points v● surping that to themselues whic● thou hast reserued to thy self ; what shal become of subiects ? Certainly they wil not wel know what to do vnles it be very right between them and thee . But alas , Mat. 3. 15. Si sal euanuerit in quo salietur ? If the salt loose its vertue in what shal it be salted ? Happy are they that light vpon a good Superior ; but much more happy are they , who by true light in Humility and Abnegation are instructed by thee , who art the only true teacher of Humility , true obedience and perfect Pryer . O my Lord , when shal it be said , that the multitude of beleiuers are of one hart and soul ? When shal al be vnited in the bonds of true peace ? Neuer til our Charity beginning in thee do spread it self to al others for thee . For there is no true friendship but that which thou knittest between such as loue al in and for thee , and thee aboue al that can be imagined or desired . O when shal thy Iustice and Truth in all things take place , ☜ that the earth may breath forth nothing but thy Praise ? Then we should be in paine , and not seeme to suffer● so sweet or pleasing would the pai● be ; we should liue on earth , ( no● as being strangers ) in heauen ; and liuing heer should more liue wit● thee our beloued , then where we of necessity liued . For then thy wil being done in earth as in heauen ; the earth would resemble heauen , wherby the pain and grief of our banishment would be sweetned with ● comfort almost heauenly , and tha● together with resigning our selues to thy holy wil to be contented to be denyed for a time til thy wil might thereby be wholy accomplished● and after that come to see thy glorious face and enjoy thee as thou an● in thy-self , who is our only happines the expectation w●erof would mak● this world tolerable to vs , and w● should then seek thy glory and th● fulfilling of thy●ustice ●ustice in al things and not our own comfort , an● honour . Verily , al thy disposition are so iust , that al things woul● happen to our greatest good , i● we with humility and confidence in thee would proceed in al things ; And not any state , condition , or corporal complexion is there , wherein thou hast not been serued in a perfect maner by some , or other . And if we run through al degrees from the Pope to the simple Religious , and from the greatest Monarc● to the poorest begger , in al we shal find some that haue faitfully serued and praised thee . And as for natur●l co●plexions , or dispositions , the most wicked haue brought forth children prouing Saints ; and others who haue liued ( as to al maner of sins● so i● , that whole Contreys haue fared the worse for them , and diuers souls perished by their means , yet by humility haue become so pleasing to thee , O Lord , that thou madst them thy boosom friends ; And no trade nor occupation , i● it be lawful , but hath o● it Saints , to the end to shew thou despisest nothing that thou ha●t made , how contemptible soeuer it seeme in the eyes of men . Why therefor do we not loue thee , seeing al things on thy part concur to this end ? We may pret●nd what excuse we wil ; but nothing wil excuse vs before thee , who had no other end in creating vs , but that we should be partakers of that glory which thou prepared for those that truly loue thee ; and in that country of al happines , we s●al receaue al good things , and aboue al shal enioy thee the beginning and fountain of al good , without whom al things are as nothing as to the contenting and satisfying of our souls . And seeing meerly thou cr●atedst vs for ou● good , thou being infinitly happy of thy-self before thou createdst any thing , why shal we lay the fault of our not profiting or euerlasting perishing vpon the● ? If there had bee● any thing wanting of thy part , w● might iustly complain to thee ; an● if there were any thing yet meerly necessary , we requiring it humbl● of th●e . thou couldst not ●so infin●● good art thou ) deny it vs . But seein● thou createdst man in the state of innocency , and after his ●al redeemedst him with the pretious Bloud of thy ouly begotten Son , and hast giuen vs a Law vnder which we are to walk , ☜ and by means of our holy Mother the Church hast and dost determine of al things as certainly as if that thou thy-self wert stil corporally present to giue answers in al things necessary to saluation , how worthily are we to be condemned if we do not correspond and satisfy such thy most gratious wil and prouision about vs ? Besids we haue thee within vs , to haue recourse vnto vpon al occasions , the which that we may do with the les impediments thou hast ordained the ouerlooking and solicitude ouer vs of the Superiors thy Vicegerents , who gouern vs heer by ●hy appointment , and whom to resist in any thing so it do not derog●te from thy own authority immediatly to thy-self ) were highly to offend and displease thee . For by these thy Substituts thou dost iudg , and determin of Spirits and of the verity and goodnes of them and of their exercises , and doings ; as whether they proceed from thee and thy motions , or no ; and by them declarest what in general is to be done , or omitted ; and in particular as there is occasion , in seculars partly by seculars powers , and in Religious by their Pastours and Superiours , that thus being in some certeinty of subordination , and good exterior order , we may freely attend to thee in our souls , without going forth but of meere necessity .

THE L. CONFESSION .

O WHO would seek , or loue any thing but thee my God , who art exceeding great , and of thy goodnes , there is no end ? Who woul● loose thee for nothing , and depa●t from the fountain of life , for to drink out of a Cestern , that is ●ul of filthy , and muddy water ! What are al things , but thy self , for the satisfying of our souls ? If thou diedst as thou diedst for vs , that we might liue ouly to thee , can we think it much , if heauens , earth , sea , and al contained in them , rise vp against vs forgetting and neglecting thy Mercy ? O let vs loue thee , and al things wil be at peace with vs , and we at peace with our selues . Is it not a shame for vs to see the birds praise thee , and al creatures in their kind to giue the honour , and yet we only capable of thy loue forgetful and vngrateful to thee ? What is there is this world but it calleth vpon vs to seek thee in sincerity of hart , and to liue to thee alone , and to make vse of them euery one in their kind , to the end we may concur with them to the praise of thee our Lord , and Creator , to whom al loue and honour is only due ? The Angels most humbly assist vs , and pitty vs offending thee , which willingly to do is so hainous a thing in their eyes that they are amazed to see vs stray from true reason . But alas man was in honour , and knew it not ; he was compared to beasts and becam● like vnto them . In this my misery I sigh and groane to my God , who in this my affliction is only able to help and comfort m● . O how can we find in our hart to offend thee ? That , and that alone is to be esteemed truly a misery . But yet are we sinners without comfort ? No , no , my God , seeing thou canst forgiue more then we can offend , and it wil redound to thine ●onour and praise for euer and euer , that thou hast pardoned so many and greiuous sins and sinners . In which thy glory I ●xult from ●he bottom of my soul ; becaus seeing I haue offended , for which I am hartily sorry , yet wil my God be extolled by al creatures for forgiuing it , for al eternity . O thou ●ho art thine own praise supply in this and in al other things , the defect that is in al vs thy creatures to praise thee as thy iu●tice requireth thou so shouldst be magnifyed by vs al , who without thee are nothing but a sack full of filth , and the map of al misery .

THE LI. CONFESSION .

O Lord , my deare God , if we that are created to mine own image and liknes , and whose happines doth consist in louing , pleasing , praising , and enioying thee ! If we ( I say ) ● did seek and desir only thee , how wel would it go in this world ? If we were faithful to thee , al things would be so to vs . When I see any of thy creatures abuse the nobility of their soul by straying from thee , or at least by loosing their time which is so precious , in labouring and taking great pains to obtain the fauour of men , or something els as litle to the purpose how can it but wound my very hart ? seeing thou art neglected , and they take great pains for what they cannot possible obtain ; in the meane time forgetting to seek after thy sweet loue , which might be obtained euen for nothing , in comparison of what they sustain by labouring for that which perhaps if they do get , or obtain , they are farther from being satisfyed then they were before . It is true the more we loue thee , the more we desire to loue thee ; And the more we loue , the more able we are to loue , and the more easy it is to loue ; and loue making al pains , confusions , difficulties , and afflictions sweet , what is there left to suffer ? Only indeed the hiding of thy face and denying vs fully to enioy thee ; this only remains to pearce our harts with , if we truly loue ; ☞ and yet thy iust wil is a consolation euen in the greatest extremity of this difficulty . Who would therefor not loue thee , wholy forgetting themselues and their own profit , and commodity either for time or eternity ? Certainly the Prophets , Martyrs , Confessors , and Virgins that loued thee more then their liues found torments , bannishments , imprisonments , and persecutions sweeter by reason of their loue to thee , and of their desiring to be faithful to thy amiable Maiesty , then al the pleasures , contentments , riches honours , and glory of the world did euer yet yeald to those that haue most abounded therewith since the beginning of the world . O if we could ask Salomon ( for al the aboundance he liued in ) and S. Francis in his pouerty , or S. Laurence vpon his Gridiron ; and certainly both by his acknowledgment and theirs , their pouerty , and pain through loue , were sweeter then al his delights euen in this world ; yea euen Iob sitting vpon the Dunghil and saying ; God gaue , and God hath taken away , as it pleaseth our Lord so let it be , his name be blessed for euer enioyed more comfort and true peace in soul , then al the comforts and pleasures of this world could giue , or haue caused to him . For only submission to thee , my deare God , bringeth true comfort to our souls ! O if we did truly humble ou● selues , how greatly would thy goodnes be exalted in our souls ? If we did seek thee , not thy gifts , graces , and comforts , how then should we go out of our selues and therby enter into thee ? O if we were rruly humble , how much wouldst thou be pleased to be serued by vs ? and how many do fare the better for thy humble ones , though they be hidden and vnknown for such to the world● Certeinly the humble are so deare to thee , ☞ that thou seemest not willing , or able to do any thing without them For while vnmindful of al but thee , they forget themselues , thou in ● the meane time enrichest them with thine own works , that they may merit more grace , glory and fauour before t●ee in al things thou dost or permittest , to which to the vttermost of their power they concurre by humble resignation , if they can do no more , which is sufficient to satisfy thee , who needest not our works , or labours ; but it is our harts , souls , and loues that thou requirest , and by which thou wilt do good to vs , or by vs . What thou thinkest meet for vs to do , or to be able to do , ought to be indifferent to vs , who should haue no wil but thine , nor any election but of thee . Wel may it be said , that where Humility is , there is also Wisedom . For the truly humble being guided by thy interior Truth and Iustice more then by human wisedom , surpasse the weaknes of their own folly ; for so al wisedom may be esteemed , that is not from thee and in thy light , by which light only we can discern the glorious truth and not by the natural light of our weak vnderstanding , ☜ that is not able without a beame of thy Grace to discouer such truth , so blind is our soul of it-self without t●ee ; and it is only true humility that maketh vs capable of this thy light . And yet if a soul had been with S. Paul in the third Heauen , if she should leaue the way of Humility , she would return to her former blindnes , and the more she by vsurping thy gifts and graces to herself did puff vp her self , the more al true light and discretion would depart from her soul , and the more het folly would appeare to heauen , and earth to her great confusion both in this life and in the next if she did not return and come to know her own nothing . For as it is truly said ; The corruption of the best , is the worst . O Lord deliuer al from this accursed sin of pride , which turned Angels into most vgly diuels , and hath been the ca●se of the separation of so many souls ( created by thee to enioy eternal felicity ) from thee my God ; But especially deliuer those from this most odious vice who haue had the means by the mercy of thy sweet Goodnes , to come to some true knowledg of thee and themselues . For if we knew al , and could discourse with al the wit and eloquence of the Philosophers , ☞ Orators , and Diuines of the causes and effects of al natural and supernatural things , yet if we did not know thee by endeauouring truly to loue thee , we might truly be said to know nothing . For only by louing thee and knowing our selues is true Wisedom obtained . And how can it but peruert al true Iustice , that thou art by so few ( in comparison of the whole world ) sought with a pure intention ? If we being almost to death benumed with cold should for remedy go forth into the blustering and far colder wind , or in the scortching heat of sommer should for mitigation therof to our body go to an hot flaming fire , who would not iudg vs euen out of our witts for our so doing ? Euen so we when wanting supernatural light that is true light and necessary for the guidance of vs in the way towards thee , we in lieu of seeking after that light and of taking the means to come by it , ☜ do betake vs on●y to our natural light , the which as to the said supernatural end is but meere blindnes , and darknes , and thus proceeding in assuming for our means the contrary o● that w● should , we prosper both in our practice and in our end accordingly . The things which we practise as vertues being indeed no true vertues for want of the discretion that it necessary for the perfection of them● and the which discretion is but the self same as the light had from thee , wherby often-times our pretended vertues come to haue more of vices then of true vertues in them , such defect proceeding out of this , that indeed in our in●ard and secret consciences we think that we are able to do that which is right and pro●itable of our own selues and without light , and ability for it from thee . And when harm falleth to vs , or to others by such our blind proceedings we lay the fault of it vpon thee where it is not● and not vpon our selues , where indeed it is . O ler this folly also be far from vs ! for thou art iust , O my Lord , and thy iudgments are equity , how hidden soeuer thy meaning in them be to our souls . I for my part desire to adore thee in al thou disposest , and do most gladly acknowledg , that al thou hast made is good , if it be put for that vse ●or which thou madst it . Do not we see that euen Spiders , and Serpents do draw the venom from the earth both for the purging it , and also for a farther vse that man therof maks , and yet these to our seeming are of the least worth as to good among thy creatures . But it is our mis-vsing , abusing , and mis-applying thy creatures that makes the world turn vpside down . The hail thunder storms , rain , & snow , did the three Children in the furnace inuite to praise thee as good in themselues being made by thee . But nothing is so good in this world , but it may be peruerted and abused . For if man whose soul was made by thee in such purity , by sin becometh so foul , how can this choose but breed disorder in the world , al things therein being giuen by thee to be disposed by him , and vsed by him as ●●lp● to ●●rue thee while we liue heer ? But ô my God , I wil speak to thee , and I wil cal vpon thee who art Wised●m it-self ; If thou smile at my folly . yet behold me sinner , and instruct me in thy Law , which is sweet aboue al delights of the world ; and to serue thee for loue , is that which I only desire . In al my miseries and afflictions of body and soul thou despis●st not any soul flying to thee , and dilating my-self to thee , I do comfort and strengthen my hart , which aspireth to nothing , as thou knowst by this my speaking to t●ee , but to ease my soul by begging help of thee , and declaring to thee my only friend , my sins and miseries . For if we fly from t●ee whither go we , but out o● one darknes into another ? Who can discouer our wounds to vs , but thy-f●lf , who when we acknowledge them , dost also cure the languishing diseases of our very souls ? O in thy light let me see light , that so al imp●diments may be remoued between thy Godnes and my sou● ? My ●oul can neuer return to thee , til it ●e purged and purifyed by grace●nd ●nd Mercy . Of my-self I can do nothing . Thou therefor that madst and redeemedst me , saue me , who euery moment should perish , if I were not assisted by thee . I see nothing , or hear any thing , but it giueth me new cause to praise thee , and to seek thee aboue al gifts , graces , and creatures ; Grant me therefor to serue thee in that maner thou wouldst be serued by me● For I am not able to do any thing good of my self . Let me by Humility and tru● obedience return to thee , from whom for my sins I deserue to be separated with the diuels eternally ; but thy Mercy , which is aboue al thy works , pardon me , and giue me Grace to liue better heerafter . O my God , me thinks some times I haue so liuely a feeling of my own nothing , and see so plainly that we depend wholy of thy grace , and Mercy , that I wonder how it is possible I should an● more be able to presume of my-self in any thing whatsoeuer . But alas this passeth away ; ☞ and like dust carried away with the winde , so is my soul with vanity ; In which my sin , and misery I groan to thee from the bottom of my soul , who art my helper and my deliuerer from al mine enemies , wherof the greatest is my self ; and to thee I declare my iniquities which are without end , or measure , to the end I may glorify thee the more who shewest mercy to me , and reiectest not the most disloyal of al thy Maiesties seruants . For which let heauen , and earth praise thee , seeing I am not able by any thing to shew gratitude to thee . For I can do nothing but declare thy Mercy , and beseech thys●lf to supply my defect in praising thee . For thou only canst do it , as I desire it should be done . The very Seraphins are too short of being able according to thy worth to praise thee and al thy Angels and ●aints accompt themselues , as dumb in comparison of thy deserts from them For al thy sweet Mercy be thou there● for by al , not as able , but as willing to praise t●ee , magnifyed for euer and euer . Amen .

THE XLII . CONFESSION .

O My Lord , and my God ; If none haue much forgiuen them , but those that loue much , what wil become of me ? This day we read in our Office , that Saint Marie Magdalen coming to thy feet ( which she watered with her reares ) heard that comfortable answer from thee , to wit ; Go in peace , thy sinnes are forgiuen thee ; Luk 9. ●5 . but it was out of this regard that she loued much . This answer thou madst to her ( whose hart in silence spoak vnto thee ) doth much comfort my sinful soul. But yet when I remember how void I am of that which was the necessary disposition for her soul to hear those comfortable words , thy sins are forgiuen thee , go in peace , it draweth teares ●rom mine eyes to see how far my soul is destitute of that pure loue which preuaileth with thy diuine Maiesty . What shal I say ? What shal I do ? Or wherein shal I hope ? I am not fit to plead for my-self , my sinnes , indeed are so many and so great ; and as for the loue which only thou desirest , behold my soul is destitute of it . For if I haue any towards thee , my God it is but a sensible , childish loue , which is a loue little beseeming the bestowing vpon such a God , who is al Good , Beawty , Wisedom , yea euen Goodnes and Loue it-self ; to whom is due a loue which is able to suffer al things for this loue is a strong loue , more strong then death it-self , the which kind of loue is far from me , who am blown down with the least blast of temptation , and cannot endure any disgrace , desolation , or difficulty whatsoeuer , as it beseems a true louer of his . But notwithstanding my poue●ty , and misery , yet I wil hope in him and wil approach to his feet , who is Mercy itself . There , my Lord , and my God , I wil in filence sigh and weep both for my sinnes and for my defect in louing thee , who art worthy of al loue and Praise whatsoeuer . There I wil beg this loue so much to be desired . There I wil wish and long for it● and from thy feet I wil not depart til thou denounce to me ; thy sins are forgiuen thee , and saiest to my soul , go in peace . This voice I long to hear in my hart , that I may with the voice of exaltation praise thee for euer . Amen .

THE LIII . CONFESSION .

AMen , Amen , dico vobis ; quia receperunt mercedem suam . ( Math. 6. , Amen , Amen I say ●nto you they haue receiued their reward . These thy words my Lord and my God come into my mind so often as my thoughts dare to think of hauing deserued any reward at t●y hands , and serue as a motiue to subiect my soul totally to thy diuine Maiesty , before whom now I do professe , and acknowledg that my desirs , and endeauours are so defectiue in comparison of what is to thee due from me ; that I may , and do euen say to my soul ; Peace ; be humble and subiect in al to thy God , whom thou art not worthy so much as to name with thy defiled mouth . Indeed my Lord , whose power and Maiesty prostrate I acknowledg and adore● with al mine hart and soul ; if I should , neither in this , nor in the next world , ☞ receaue any other reward but what already thou hast bestowed on me , which I haue ( I must needs con●esse ) receaued gratis of thy Mercy without any desert of mine owne , Shee dyed presently heerevpon . yet that which t●ou hast so already done for me , is sufficient to declare to Heauen , and earth the superaboundance of thy mercy and clemency to a sinful , and contemp●tible creature . I wil there for sing vnto thee mercy , and iudgment al the days of my life , wishing always that thy wil , which is Iustice it-sel●● may be wholy and perfectly accom●plish●d in me , thy sinful seruant Let me liue as-long as it pleaseth thee , or dy in the very beginning of these my desires to loue ; send sicknes , or health ; suddain or lingring death ; pouerty , or aboundance , good fame or that I be by al the world despised ; and in fine in al do with me as it is most for thine honour . For in this I pla●e al my comfort and happines , faithfully to serue thee , and to be little or great in thine eyes , as seemeth best to thee . For I accompt it a sufficient reward for al that euer I shal be able to do , or suffer , that thou hast admitted me vnworthy wretch , into a place of liuing where I may know and euen see with mine eyes how to serue and please thee ; this ( I say ) is more then can be deserued by me For to serue thee is an honour aboue al that can be imagined by me ; yet without any regard of recompence it is due to thee , that I serue , and loue thee with al the forces of my body and soul , which grant I may now begin to do and perseuer therin til my end , that I may for thy own sake obtain the happines eternally to praise thee . O remoue al impediments between my soul and thee ; Let me dy to al created things that I may liue alone to thee● O let al creatures be to me , as if they were not , to the end I may more fully attend to thee in the bottome of my soul , where I wil in silence harken to thee ! Speak Peace to my soul , that I may be capable of thy voice more sweet then al things whatsoeuer . Speak to my hart ; but speak so as I may hear thee . Teach me how to practise to thy honour those diuine vertues which make souls so pleasing to thee ; to wit Charity , Humility , Obedience , Patience , and Discretion , which iudgeth between custome and true reason ; between opinion and thy true Iustice , which manifesteth it self to those souls , who seek only to loue and praise thee .

THIS pious soul hauing written thus far went no farther , being surprised with a bodily indisposition vpo● the 29. or 30. of Iuly 1633. which proued to be h●r last sicknes that brought her to a happy death vpon the 17. of August following . The last of these Confessions saue one , she began ( as there appeareth ) vpon S. Mary Magdalens day , being the 22. of Iuly next b●fore her death .

HEERE FOLLOW SOME other Sentences , and Sayings of the same pious Soul found in some others papers of hers .

THE interior , or Spiritual disposition os man , is of that great , and infinit worth , and moment ; that so it be wel , al other matters wil also go wel , and be in good plight . And the good state of the interior ( and therby also of the exterior ) proceedeth from the harkning to and following of the Diuine interior Cal , or inspiration , the which to a ●oul capable of an internal life is , or ought to be as al in al. And wo to such a soul who ouercome by threats or perswa●ions from without , or by temptations within her , or , other occasions whatsoeuer , g●ueth ouer her prosecution of Mental prayer , by meanes wherof only is she capable of discerning and following the diuine wil , and Cal. And therefor ô you souls that are capable of internal prayer , do you accordingly prosecute it , and be grateful to God for the grace of it . For it causeth the greatest happines that is to be gotten in this li●e , and an answarable happines in the future . For by it in this life one passeth through al things how hard , and paineful soeuer they be . By it we become familiar euen with God him-self , and to haue our conuersation in Heauen . By it al impediments wil be remoued between God and the soul● : By it you shal receaue light and grace for al that God would do by you , By it we shal come to regard God in al things , and profitably neglect our selues . By it we shal know how to conuerse on earth without pr●iudice to our souls : And in fine by it we shal praise God , and become so vnited to him , that nothing shal be able to separate vs for time , or eternity from his sweet Goodnes . And let him be al in al to vs , who only can satisfy our souls . He is his own Praise , i● which and by w●ich we are infinitly happy , though of our selues we a●e able to praise and loue him , but in a very poore maner . who can say ( that desire nothing but to loue and praise him ) that they are poor , seeing he who is more theirs then they are their owne , is so rich , ond to whom nothing is wanting that should make him an infinit happines ? in this let vs ioy , in this iet vs glory without intermission . when we are not able to attend vnto him and praise him as we would , let vs commend our hart and soul to the Saints in H●auen , who without ceasing praise our Lord : Let vs do that by them , which we are not able to do by our selues : yea let vs desire him , who is his own praise , and only is able to do it as he d●serue●h to haue it done , to supply what he desire●h we should wish him . L●t vs s●ek no other cōfo●t but to be able without al comfort to be true to him , Let vs rest in him alone , and and not in any thing that is or can be crea●ted . Let vs not se●ke the gist , but the giuer . O hoW little is al the loue we can giue him , in comparison of that he deserueth from vs ? where , theref●r shal th●re be room for any created thing in out souls ? Let vs wish and desire . and ( as far as it lyes in vs ) procure that al loue be giuen to him . Let him haue al Glory , al Honour , and al Praise , Let vs desire the fauour of none , but him alone , to whose free disposition , let vs stand for time and eternity , as absolutly by ou● wil , as if we neuer had any other freedom of w●l in vs . Nothing we do or suffer , let vs este●me great : for our sinnes deserue much more . Let our whole care tend to the magnifying of him . Let his honour b● ours , and let vs seek nothing , but to be whoiy his , who is most worthy to be that that hee is If it is his delight be to be with the children of men , what should comfort vs , but to praise and loue him ? Those that seeke him shal find him With al their heart , O who would seek any thing besids him , see●ng he is not more willing to giue vs any thing , then his own self , heer by grace , and heerafter in Heauen by glory Let vs adore him in spirit and truth . Al w● can giue him is nothing , vnles we entierly giue him our selues , and that also cannot add to his greatnes , and glory : yet if we doe this , so much doth his diuine Maiesty esteem of this gift , that for it and in requital of it , he wil giue vs his own self : al his gifts , and graces are a meanes for the preparing of vs for this end , if we vse thei● rightly with Humility , and according to the iust wil of Almighty God . Let vs extend our wil to serue , loue , praise , please , and magnify our Lord to the vttermost we are able , ●ea wthout al limits or bounds . Le● vs ●esire his honour , til such time as we may be swallowed vp in the bottomles Ocean of al loue , and praise God in himself , in whom and by and in whom only , we can praise him as we ought . Let vs loue him as far as we ar● possible able , without regard of our selues , either for time , or eternity . This is the humble loue that feeleth no burden . This is the loue that knoweth not how to attribute any thing it doth or suffereth , to it-self . It chooseth not wherin God sh●l make vse of her , but accommodateth her-self in al things to his diuine pleasure . If it were his wil to hau● it so , she would rather for euer be picking vp chips or straws , then out of her own election , to be doing that which is most admired , or might seeme to her to procure her the greatest reward . O you souls that God bestoweth his loue vpon , think it not much to beare the burthen , not only of your selues , but also of al that you liue with : for God beareth you vp in al , more then you can cōceaue or imagin , Beware aboue al things of pride , For that cast euen Angels out of heauen . A soul of prayer as-long as she keeps Humility , ☜ is in no peril of going out of her way .

It is certainly true , that God giueth himself to them , who forsake al : I say , al and not by halfs , ☜ with reseruing what we please to our selues , but to al that forsake al , he giueth himself , without exception of persons , and he that pleaseth our Lord ne●deth nor feare al the diuels in hel .

It is a wonderful thing to see the variety of opinions that are , or may be about the best vse of those things that of themselues are indifferent , or at least are not euil , one holding this , a●d another that , euery man according to his fancy , and ( as Saint Paul saith ) abounding in his ●wn sense . Rom. 4 3. No wonder then that those that liu● , and conuerse with others , and namely in a Religious Community , do easily fal into occasion of iars , and differences with others , whilst euery one pretends the truth , and the best to be of her side , howsoeuer it be indeed ; and therefor ones n●ture wil easily take occasion of iarring with o●hers , if it be not mort●fyed by restraint from what it is inclining to by such occasions . It is only the diui●e vertue of true discretion that is able to discern and iudg for ones own practise what is good , better , or best of al in the vse of those indifferent things . The more truly mortifyed the ●oul is , the cleerer is such light of discretion in her , and wil incre●se in her , if she be stil solicitous more and more to liue to God in her interior , and to dy to her-self , and to al created things by simply regarding God in al she doth , o● omitteth , & intending him alone in al ●●●ngs .

It is a true prouerbe that it is an easier matter to corrupt the mind of one , then of a great many . Wherefor we must remember that it is a good , and happy thing for Brethren to dwel in One , or rather ( by true loue and charity ) in that One Which is truly necessary , ☜ to wit , in God . For no loue is true , but that which is in him , and for him , and without impediment to his loue . Al other loues are false , slippery , peruerse and vaine , as not being founded in God the ground of al true , and happy loue , nor being referred to him and his loue . But the true loue , which is the diuine , wil make al others deare vnto vs for his sake , and none deare but in h●m and for him . It wil make vs in capable of accounting any to be our enemies how hardly soeuer they treat vs , because in al things we wil regard God , that permitteth such difficulties to happen to vs , to the end our fidelity to him may therby be tried and so not rega●d ( with any auersion ) the party who afflicteth vs : And it wil be sufficient for vs towards the pacification of our soul vpon the hard , or bitter vsadge offred vs , that we remember that he hath suffred it to happen to vs for our good , who only knoweth what is best for the humbling of vs and the abating of our pride , the which must be done if wil be pleasing to God , to whom now , and euer I commit my-self . Amen .

Vnum sit mihi ●o●um , id est , omnia in omnibus . Let one be al to to me , that is , Al in Al. This was a Poesy bestowed on me and my Parteners by another , the truth wherof I pray God may an●werably be in the harts , and loues of vs , and of al other souls whatsoeuer .

The simple ex●rc●se of the wil being faithfully and perse●erā● , prosec●ted ( through Gods concurring g●●ce ) remoueth in time al impediments be●ween our soul and God ; ☞ and the soul by loue cometh so to transcend al created thi●gs , y●a euen her own self , that al creatures are to her as if they were not , as to any hurtful distraction they cause to her , or as to any other impediment between her and God , the which can be only by inordinate adhering in affection to those creatures .

A true spiritual internal life is so priuate and secret between God and the soul , that others cannot easily dis●erne it , no not by by the external effects of it . ☞ For in her exterior cariadge ●he is common , and general as hating singularity ; by meanes w●erof , she euoideth much occasion of pride , and walketh the more se●urly between God and her .

Those ●hat liue an internal life do so wi●hdraw al natural inordinate affection from creatures , that they often therfor are censured by superiors & equals to neglect others out of pride . But they abhorring to haue special interest in any , do proceed so far as they can , according to true charity , and mind not what others iudg of them , they desiring only in al to dischardg their duty to God , ●hom they regard in al things ; and as they haue interest in none , so not any hath interest in them . In that which they propose to Supe●iors they proceed ( as in al things els ) with al sincerity , de●esting the contrary practise euen with those that are most aduerse , and contrary to them , much more with Superiors ; and whatsoeuer they desi●e to do , they do it with such an indifferency , th●t what euent soeuer come of it , they remain in peace , embracing it as Gods wil , whose wil is their law . If that which they propose , either for the common good and peace of the house , or for their own g●od● do not seeme fit in true Iustice , or reason to Super●ors to be granted , they impo●tune no farther , nor desire the fauour of being condescended to in their motion . ●ut rather ( remaining themselues indifferent ) that they determine and p●oceed in it , to whom it apperta●neth .

A Superior hath gre●t reason to take heed of putting a soul from the exercise of her internal Prayer , or so ouerchardging h●r with labourss , or solicitudes , that she cannot not become r●collected ●n her daily praier , it being a soul that hath aptnes in her to make spiritual progresse by prayer , and the other exercises of a Contemplatiue life ; yea not only the soul her-self wil feel the vnspeakable dammage that w●l come to her therby , but also the Superior himself in the Obedtence which he expecteth , and is due to him from her , wil see the harme and loosse that cometh by such be● reauing of the soul of her prayer . For she who would by discreet , prosecuting a course of mental praier haue become subiect ( i● it were necessary ) euen to the creature tha● is of the least esteeme , or worth in the world , becometh now for want of that str●ng●h and help which is gotten by such prayer ; to be almost impossible to be ruled by ●he w●sest man in the world . For liuing in Religion ( as I can speak by experience● if one be not in a right course of prayer and other exercis●s , between God and our soul , ones nature groweth much worse then euer it would haue been if she had liued in the world . For pride and self-loue , which are rooted in our soul by sinne , findeth means to strengthen it self exceed●ngly in one in Religion , if she be not in a cours● that may teach her and procure her tru● Humility . For by the corrections and contradictions of the wil ( which cannot by any be auoided , but wil be , liuing in a Religious Community ) I found my hart grown , as I may say , as hard as a stone , and nothing would haue been able to haue mollified it , but by being put into a course of prayer , by which a soul tendeth towards Go● , and learneth of him the lesson of truly humbling , herself ; In which course being placed , and euer tending to the increase of Humility , euen the defects and errors she committeth either out of frailty or ignorance , ●o turn to her gaine , as giuing her occasion of the greater humbling of her-self to and vnder God ; and Humility , and the loue of God ( wherein al her good consisteth ) do each of th●m increase the one the other , f●r they are inseparable companions .

It is the grace of God and tending to him by way of loue , that only can so enable a soul , that no difficulty , or disgrace can happen , which she is not prepared for , and therefor is able willingly to embrace the same . Verily I can affirme this by mine own experience , that a crosse word , or slight reprehension before I got into th●s spiritual cours , was more insupportable to me , and did more disquiet my mind , then al the difficul●ies or disgraces , which since haue faln vpon me , haue done . For now me thinks though I be neglected by al the world , yet by flying to our Lord he easeth ●e of al my burthen ; and as I haue desired to haue no other friend , or comforter but him so it pleaseth him neither in doubts , fe●●es , paines , disgraces , nor in any other miseries ( whereunto this life of ours is so subiect ) to reiect me ; Only he exacts of me that in al the contradictions of w●l he sends me , or permits to fal on me , I wil humble my-self and be confident in his help ; Of Which , if I do so , I shal be much more sure , then if in mine own hands I had a most absolut power .

None are able to presecute the waye of the Diuine Loue , but they who are resolued to to deny themselues in al things , and who willingly and wittingly adhere to no created thing ; For if the soul do willingly retain an affection to any such thing , she is at a stop , and can go no farther . For God must be sought and loued wholy , if we desire to arriue to Perfection .

Shee speaking of the Sanctity of the old Orders in old time , when th●y were in their best case , or in the Prime of their good Spirits , writeth and sayeth as as followeth , viz.

THEN only the honour of God was sincearly , without intermingling of human ends , or interests , intended and sought , and al Orders with one consent of hart did concurre to the aduancement of that alone , they then applied themselues to seueral exercises in the exterior euery one according to his Institute , some more easy and some more strict , some of more action , and some of lesse ; yet interiorly their principal end was al one , and that was to find and enjoy God in their souls ; and out of that perfect Charity which esp●●cially by those their internal ex●rcises did gro● in them , they did eue●y one as God did require and enable them , imploy part of their time in gaining , or doing good to other souls . Th●n there was no great care or solicitude about temporall●ties , God taking care , and being as it were solicitous to them ; Th●n there was indeed al sincere and real proceedings between them ; Then there was perfect amity without proper interest or fond affection to the impediment of the●r louing and seeking after God alone ; who is that One thing which only is necessary ; Then there was no acceptation of persons , but they were contented , so Gods honour were aduanced , not caring though it were done by any other Order as wel as by themselues . O Lord my God , if this Spirit might be reuiued againe , how much would my soul rejoice ? If Saint Benets his , S. Francis h. s , S. Ig●atius his , &c. children were perfectly , as this life wil permit , vnited together , and with one hart , and consent seek and labour to aduance thy honour and praise , as our founders do in Heauen , which if we did then would the S●irit of the primitiue Church flourish , and thy torn and mangled members be healed and perfectly set againe together ; Then heretiks and sinners would easily be conuerted by them to thee ; Then there would be another learning , then now there doth flourish in our Order ; and thou by them wouldst speak , who makest the to●gues of infants eloquent ; Wis. 10 Then they by prayer conuersing in a familiar and tender maner with thee , would speak so , that none would be able to resist thee in them , Then their iudgment would be so cleered that they would vnderstand most hidden myste●ies ; Then an hower of praier would instruct them more fully , then fifty years study can do , they hauing by the meane of such prayer ( in al things ) relation to thee the only true wisedom , and in whose light only is true light to be seen . By louing thee and dying to themselues in al things they would become maisters of themselues , and al the world would then no●hing moue them , nor would any thing affright them , becaus thou wouldst be their stay and comfort in al things .

If we wil do as we ought and as is best for vs , we must be subiect to the wil of God in al things without exception ; And this is the be●efit of an internal life , that it makes one capable of seeing and knowing Gods wil , and ●lso most ready to performe it , Which way soeuer he signify it to them ; which makes them obey as readily , and willingly ( meerly for Gods sake and out of obedience to him ) a simple or imperfect Superior , as they would an Angel , or the Wisest creature in the world ; yea if it were possible that a worme , or any other creature were ordained by God to rule ouer them , ●hey would with al their harts embrace his wil by them . For without this total subiect●on to God , it is impossible to become truly Spiritual . For if we resist his wil in our Superiors ; in vaine do we pretend to please him ? This vertue therefor of Obedience , we must learn of him the which must be grounded vpon true ' Humility , that must be our stay in al things . And those two vertues of Humility and Obedience , together with the diuine vertue of Discretion , he wil teach vs , if we do our parts in seeking to become more & more humble , and subiect to him . For seeing it is his wil we should obey and become truly Humble , how can we doubt but he wil giue vs the grace , if we Humbly and perseuerantly beg it of Him , and practise those vertues vpon occasions as wel as we can ? For he himself hath sa●d ; Luk 11.12 . wh●n we aske our father bread , he doth not giue a stone , nor if we aske him fish , wil he giue a serpe●t ; much lesse wil he deny vs what is necessary to make vs pleasing to him , and we seeking , or desiring nothing but by true loue to be faithful to him . O Praier , praier , able to obtaine al things ! O how cometh it to passe my Lord , that this O●●ipotent thing ●as some of thy deare seruants tearme it ) praier should be so vnknown , yea and euen to them whom thou tearmest the Salt of the earth contemned , ( I meane Mental praier ) at least for the practise of poore simple women , for whom they hold it aboue al things most dangerous , euen to my own knowledg , as I haue known affirmed by Superiors of seueral Orders ! ☞ O misery to be truly lamented by al that haue or may haue tast i● praier , and by the effect thereof know how sweet a thing it is to attend only , and wholy to the praise , and loue of Go● . Surely the want of the wisedom , ☞ which by praier the Saints did gaine , is the cause why cústome and opinion do take place for the most part in this world of true reason . Surely neuer was the world reformed of its sins and errours ; but it must be by the wisedom which cometh from God , and is farre different From that which is accounted Wisedom by the world , which as S. Paul saith ; 1. Cor. 3.19 . is folly before God .

CERTAIN OTHER DEVOtions of the same deuot Soul D. Gertrude More , which she left written in her Breuiary .

In the fore part of her Breuiary she had framed and written the ensuing praier for her due performance of the diuine Office , viz:

Al you that blesse our Lord , exalt him al you can ; for he is greater then al your praises .

OMNIS SPIRITVS LAVDET Dominum . Let euery spirit praise the Lord .

AND I ●hy poore creature , who am not worthy to name thee ( my Lord my God , and al my good ) do heer in the pre●sence of al thy Celestial Court desire 〈◊〉 pe●form this my Office with al diligen●● and with an amourous affections towards thee my ●o● , who hast impos●d this sweet and most to be desired obligation vpon me sinner , who doth not deserue any such honour , or comfort from thee as to be admitted to ioine my cold and frozen praises with al those who praise thee either on earth or in heauen where al to my comfort do without ceasin● continually praise thee . And for what is wanting in me for the performance thereof , as I should and ought to do , supply it out of the superaboundance of th● merits and merc● ; I desire to say it with al my hart according to the intention of our holy Mother the Catholick Church ; of which I desire through thy grace to liue , and dy a true member ; be th●u according to her desir , Adored , Blessed , Magnified , and supreamly Superexalted by ●t ; Let it be to the honour of thy al Immacula●e Mother the Lady and Queen of Angels , and Saints , to these in a particular maner ; ● viz ) to my good Angel , our most holy Father S. Benet , S. Scholastica , S Ioseph , S. Peter and S. Paul , S. Iohn Enangelist , S. Iohn Baptist , S. Thomas , and my deare S. Augustin , S. Mary Magdalen , S. Gertrude ; and in fine , al that are in Heauen haue by it to them exhibited by thee what thou , willest and desirest should be ; I beseech thee also that I may by it pray to thee ! or al afflicted , pained , tempted , and troubled , that they may please and praise thee in those their miseries and ouercome them to their comfort and thy glory ; I also offer to thy sweet Mercy al those souls who by deadly sin are enemies to thee , which is inde●d the misery of miseries ; O lét them return to thee w●o art our beginning and the true Center of our souls , from whom to be separated by sin ●s a most greiuous hel , and to whom to be vnited by grace is a most sweet Heauen ; Conuert therefor and recal those souls to thee for whom ●hou spa●edst not ●hy most pretious Bloud , shedding it to the very last drop for vs finners ; I offer thee also my Parents , who haue placed me heer in thy house , where here I may euen heare and see how to serue thee , and where I may night , and day attend to thee and praise thee my amiable and most to be desired beloued , whom to serue and to be obliged to loue , is the only happines in this world , and to whom to be tyed by vowes , and other obligations of Religion is a most sweet seruitude and yo●e , and so sweet that no liberty is to it to be compared ; I offer thee also our holy Congregation● and al that euer , or shal desire my poore vnworthy prayers ; and aboue al I offer thee al those in earth , or Purgatory which thy diuine Maiesty would haue me pray for to thee , beseeching thee that t●y Diuine wil , and pleasure may be perfectly accomplished in al creatures , and last of al though not with the least affection , I offer to thee this thy Conuent , wherof though very vnworthy of such a fauour as to liue in such a happy company I am a poor imperfect member , The Benedictin Nouns at Cābray . beseeching thee for thy ow●e sake , and by the loue thou bearest to al such as truly seek to please thee alone , that thou wil● mercifully enrich their souls with the most aboundant gifts of thy grace , so that their whole study may be to please , praise , and worship thee in spirit and truth , and especially I offer thee tho●e therein , that haue done , do or shal heerafter , by their patience in supporting the defects of their Sisters , ☞ and helping them by that meanes to beare their burthen , and by their giuing good example in Humility , Obedience , and other vertues , be a meane or helpe to the maintaining of Peace in this thy house ; towards which thou hast shewed so much Prouidence , that if we cast not our whole care both for body and soul vpon thee , we shal not deserue the fau●urs thou hast shewed to vs . We are thy little flock ; keepe thou euer possession of vs ; let vs be of one mind , and of one hart , and let vs al and euery one with one consent according to thy grace giuen vs simply intend , and regard ●hee in al we do , t●ink , speak , or desire : thou hast called vs and gathered vs together , send vs a good life , and a happy death , to thy Praise , Honour and Glory , who art God of al things , and to whom now and for euer be giuen al Laud and Praise by al creatures . Amen . Amen .

Delicta iuuentutis meae , & ignorantias meas ne memineris Domine .

Ab o●cultis meis munda me Domine , & ab alienis parce seruo tuo .

O Domine Spes mea ; delicta quis entelligit ?

O my God , my deare delight and al my h●ppines : Thou knowst I groan in spirit against my-self , to think that I made no more hast to conclude an euerlasting league and peace with thee my God!

O teach me to loue , or let me not liue , thou only canst do al things , and I , as t●ou wel knowst , can do nothing . Behold I desi●e to leaue al to find thee , and to dy to al created things , to the end I may liue only in , and to thee . I desire only thee , and to re●urn to thee the beginning of al creatures and the supreame beloued of al chast souls ?

O how powerful is thy true loue in a pure soul ? O purify my hart and soul , so that nothing but thy loue may liue in me !

O when shal I see my soul vnited to thee ?

O when by true loue shal my soul languish for thee ?

O when shal I be wholy turned into the loue of thee ?

O that I might do in al things that which is pleasing to thee ?

O when shal my soul by transcending al created things become capable by Charity of embracing thee in the bottom of my poor soul ?

O loue , loue , lo●e ; what wonderful effects dost t●ou work in a soul ? Thy loue , my God doth sweeten al mi●eri●s , a●d maketh light al burthens , and labours .

Verily nothing in the w●rld is so delight●ful to them that loue it , and haue as much of it as they can desire , and enioy al the pleasures and contents thereof , as it is to a louing soul , that sincerely seeketh thee , to suffer for thy loue .

O my God , what do we loose euen in this life , when we wish for , loue , or desire any thing besids thee . It is only loue that draweth thee down to vs , and eleuateth vs vp to thee !

O who would not suffer any thing to ob●ain this loue .

Nothing can comfort or satisfy my soul but to loue thee .

When wilt thou replenish my hart with thy pure loue , that resteth in thee aboue thy gifts , that my soul may truly adore thee in spirit and truth ?

Thou knowst that no grasse doth so wither for want of water , as doth my poor sinful soul for want of ●hy loue .

O that without ceasing I could praise thee !

As the s●ag , or hart beiug tired with pursuit doth thirst and pant after a sweet Spring , so doth my soul after thee , it hauing been much more tired with streying from thee then the poor hart can be by being chaced by his enem●es , by as much more as it is more greiuous to be hurt by ones self , then to haue it done by others .

O w●en shal I in al things do thy wil , that my actions may be iust , and pl●asing to thee ?

O when shal I so humble my-self ●hat I may be worthy in some sort to praise thee whom now for my pride I am not fit to name ?

Iesu Son of Dauid haue mercy on me , and of thy great pitty , and Charity remember me among the Whelps that expect and beg vnder thy table for one crum of grace from thee .

Where but vnder the shaddow of thy wings shal I repose from the heat of al inordinate pa●●ions and desires , and from that mid-day Sun that parcheth and withereth away the new spriggs , or leaues of my new sowen desir of louing , praising , and pleasing thee alone , my Lord and my God ? Who but thy self by thy sw●et grace can preserue m● from f●lling into my old sins , and sorrowes ? Thou therefor art my only Ref●ge in this day of my tribulation , and amidst the storms of this world , to thee I reueale my cause , be thou my strength and my Glory , that I may at last laying down the burthen of this mortal flesh , be admitted into that place , where I may Praise thee for euer and euer . Amen .

O my God , when shal that time come , that I shal neuer more offend thee ? This is the m●sery wherein I languish , and which maketh this world tedious to me : This only is truly to be tearmed an affliction and misery , and nothing is truly to be accounted misery , but to displease thy diuine Maiesty , Iesu Son of Dauid haue mercy on my sinful soul.

O how happy are those that loue thee ? O loue , loue , loue of my God , how far is my sinful soul from the happines of enioying thee , as my soul desireth ?

Nothing is sweet to a hart that desireth to loue her God , but to sigh , long , and pant after him .

O who wil giue me the wings of a Doue , that I may fly into the open wounds of my beloued ?

O my God , my o●ly desire , how long shal I thus be estranged from thee the God of my hart , and my portion for euer ?

O the most dearly beloued of my soul , how long , shal I by inordinatly adhering to created things b● so far from louing thee , as I ought to do ? O thou who only deserueth our loue , my God and my al !

Lord my God who alone art good and iust , shal I any longer loue uanity , and seek after a lye ? How long shal thy dispositions and most righteous ordinances be d●spleasing to thy poore seruant ? How long shal I resist thy diuine wil ?

Verily my God , in this my misery I sigh vnto thee , who art my hope from my you●h , and am displeased with my-self for hauing been so vngrateful to thy sweet mercy , acknowledging before Heauen a●d earth , that nothing is iust , but that which thou disposest , and nothing is wel done , saue so far as it is done by thee , so much as any thing I do or say is only of mine own wil and desire , so far it iustly deserueth punishment , to thee be al gl●ry .

In nothing is true Peace , but in seek●ng after God a●one , and in resting ●n him aboue al his gi●ts .

O my God , when shal I be able to say : Quis me separabit à Charitate Dei ? Who shal separate me , from the Charity of God ? O when shal I by true loue become vnited to thee the only desire of my hart and soul ? Vsquequo Domine obliuisceris me in finem ? Vsquequo auertis faciem tuam à me ? How long wilt thou forget me vnto the end ? H●w long doth thou turn away thy face from me ? wilt thou for euer be angry with thy poor seruant ? Behold thou knowst I desire no other comfort vpon earth , then to be able without offending thee to liue without al comfort human , or diuine .

O how lit●le to be esteemed is al the solaces this world can afford : The wicked haue been telling me of their delights , but they are not like those of thy Law . What comfort can any creature l●uing afford a soul that sigheth , and longeth after thee alone my God , and is bannished from the beloned of her soul ?

Verily my God , it is only thy-self that can reioyce and comfort such a soul , thou only art sweet , and al things compared to thee are as nothing , and lesse then nothing .

O my Lord , and my God , tel me , is there any thing in Heauen or on Earth that can satisfy my soul besids thee ? No certainly . Why then dost thou permit me thus to wander from thee , who art only worthy to be desired and beloued by my soul ?

O my most deare God , who can comprehend the misery that soule suffereth , that taketh comfort or desireth any comfort from any creature ?

O how long shal I be subiect to this mysery of inord●natly louing thy creatures , so that it is an impediment to the louing of thee my Creator , who art the supreame Good ? To thee alone is al loue due , and we do steal from thee , when our affection is willingly caried to any thing els whatsoeuer .

O my God , my Mercy , let vs loue thee as thy diuine Maiesty , who art Lord of al things & in whose power al things do stand , let me ( I say ) loue thee as thou wouldst be beloued by me .

O my Lord , as-long as the peace of my soul dependeth of men , I can neuer repose in thee , or ●ind thee in the bottom of my soul !

What came I into R●ligion ●or , but to loue and praise my God , my Lord , and al my good ?

O when shal I as I desire , loue thee and please thee my God and al my desire ?

O my God , how cometh it to passe that thou whose mercies are super omnia opera eius , Aboue al his works , shouldst be now tearmed to be terrible , and hard to be pleased ? Verily I am a sinner and the greatest of al sinners , and yet I haue found thee so good and easily pleased , that nothing is more pleasant then to serue thee for loue and to beare thy yoke from our youth : The yoke of sin is heauy , but thine is sweet aboue a the cont●ntments , and pleasures of this world .

Let those that seek not thee , and that desire any thing willingly but thee , feare , and return to the● , but let the harts of them that loue thee reioice , O Lord . But can I say I loue ? Verily not I. But shal I for this feare● No my God , at least not so as to loose confidence , which hath in it a great remuneration , For seeing by thy grace I desire to loue , and to leaue al for loue , I wil hop● in thy Merc● , let it assist my extreame frailty an● pouerty : Of my-self I am nothing , but in thy power I shal be able to do al things .

Thou knowst that I desire to leaue al for thy sake , and that if I knew any thing that I loued to the impediment ●of my truly seruing thee , it would be so gre●t a g●eif to my soul , that nothing in Heauen or earth could comfor● me til I see my-self freed from that miserable bondage , by thy assisting Grace● which I implore from the bottom of my soul : Set me free , I mos● humbly beseech thee by the multitude o● thy Mercies from the sinnes into which I daily fal through my frailty , remoue al imped●ments between my soul and thee , for I am frail aboue al measure ; Let me liue to thee , dying to al other things whatsoeuer . Let me find and possesse thee in the bottom of my soul : ☜ Let al creatures be ●ilent that thou alone maist be heard by me : And I wil not trouble my-self with them without , who are puffing and blowing , and thereby raising vp the dust of multiplicity , into their own and others eyes .

Let me enter into the most retired place of my soul , and sing loue songs to thee , my Al and only Good , regarding thee with the simple eye of my soul , and sighing out certa●n vnspeakabe groans in this pilgrimage of mine into the eares o● the only beloued of my hart and soul : wo is me , that euer I offended such a God! Be propitious , O Lord vnto my sin , for it is great ! O Mercy , which hath neither end , nor measure , haue pitty on me , and forgiue me my sins . Amen .

God! Let thy Truth , and not the blindnes of my own ignorance , speak to me : Speak Lord , for thy seruant heareth , or at least desireth to hear thee .

Behold I set open the eares of my soul , that I mny heare my beloued speak Iustice and Peace to my hart . For thy voice is sweet and thy face comely , and there is none like vnto th●e in Beawty and wisedom .

Thou my God , the repose of my labour , the ioy of my soul , and the comfort of my hart : Be to me al in al , and aboue al , which can be enioyed or desired : Let me , O let me , rest in thee and in no created thing whatsoeuer !

Simplify my soul that it may be able to adhere to thee my God , transcending al created things . O when shal my soul forget al , and only be mindful of thee , the most pure spirit , resting in thee aboue al thy Graces and Gifts !

O when shal I be by profound Humility reduced to the nothing , ☞ which only makes a a soul capable of thee , who art al good things , who art that simple good , in which nothing is wanting ?

How long shal I glory in any created thing , and seek my-self to the dishonour of him , with out whom I could neither haue life nor being , much lesse● to be able without him to do any thing meriting grace and Saluation ?

O my God , when wilt thou set me free , that I may glory in thee alone , and not by pride exalt dust and ashes , which is blown aw●y with euery wind , and hath no stability in it , but so far as it is holpen by thy meere Mercy . What flesh dare●h glory in itself , or presume it is able to do any good ? Verily my God , if I had most couragiously vndergon al the temptations , miseries , and afflictions that haue been , or euer shal be by al thy seruants together , I ought not to think my-self able to suffer the least that can be imagined as of my-self , but iustly ought to feare mine own frailty . Let them that glory therefor glory in thee , and not in themselues .

O that some little spark of that true light , which true Humility causeth , would enter into my soul , and neuer depart out of it , til I were wholy trasformed into that loue which giueth thee al , and it-self nothing , sauing its own defectuousnes . Thou only art Iust , thou only Holy , and I the most vile and contemptible of al thy creatutes in thine eyes , who discerneth most cleerly how it stands with me for my pride and other my abominable sinnes . Wash me in thy Bloud , and I shal yet become whiter then snow .

What would it auaile me , if I were neuer so great in the eyes of men , yea euen as great as I most vnworthy am in mine own ? Could they saue me , or iustify me in thy sight ? Is it not affirmed by the Spirit of al Truth , Vanitas omnis homo viuens . Al liuing man is vanity , without any exception of persons ? Verily my God , we are indeed but as we are in thy sight , who iudgest according to the Humility of our hart which is hidden from the sense of man . Man may iudg that to be Humility which indeed is pride , and there is no pride so great as that which clotheth it-self vnder he colour of Humility , but thou canst not be deceaued by any . O happy soul that only desireth thee to be a witnes of her desirs , endeauours , and intentions !

Happy they that are approued by thee my God , though he●r they be despised , neglected , and contemned by the whole world .

With what face can my soul tel my God , I desire to loue him , if I do it not more willingly , then I do , vndergo the hard censures of men ? Shal I desire that which I do or say may be wel thought of by others since my God him-self , was thought to do al he did in the power of Beelzebub . Shal she who hath done nothing that is good , be in esteeme , when as her beloued who is goodnes and Iustice it-self , was despised and contemned ? O my God , far be this disloyalty from my hart . Let me suffer for my sinnes , that I may become pleasing in thy sight , which is al my soul desireth .

O my God , when shal I find and possesse thee in the bottom of my soul ? When shal the eyes of my body be so closed from beholding al vanity , that the eyes of my soul may be cleered by thee to the discerning of truth ? Truly thou art a hidden God and none can walk in thy light , but the peaceful Humble , patient , and clean of hart .

O if we did but once see in thy light of truth how little we are able to do , or suffer of our selues , we would tremble to think we were able to do any thing that were good , or to attribute any thing to our own endeauours , Psal. 126. Nisi Dominus aedificauerit domum , in vanum laborauerunt qui aedificant eam : Nisi Dominus custodierit ciuitaetem fru●tra vigilat qui custodit eam . Vnles God build the house in vaine do they la●our who build it . Vnles God guard the City in vaine do they watch who guard it . It is in vaine for you to rise before light !

O light shine in my soul , and let not the darknes of mine own ignorance ouerwhelme me , any longer !

Let my soul loue , that it may liue in and to thee alone my Lord God .

When wilt thou giue me the gra●e of true Humility , which is so much spoken of , and so hard to be known what it is indeed ?

O we can neuer while we l●ue in this world , be secure from falling into the cursed sin of pride which maketh souls more odious to thee , then any o●her sin whatsoeuer . O my God helpe me out of this snare , which laieth open the way to al other sinnes .

O who dare though hee had been rapt into the third Heauens with S. Paul , attribute any gift , or grace to his owne desert ? What haue we that we haue not receaued ? and if we haue ●eceaued it , wherof should we glory ? O how soone do we loose the the labour of many years in one moment by pride ? God protecteth vs and directeth vs if we remain humble ; but in our pride he leaueth vs to our selues , til we see , and feele to our cost our own weaknes and misery .

O how plaine doth it appeare to those who are now secure for al eternity in thy Heauenly Kingdom , that if thou hadst with drawn thy grace from them while they liued heer , their case would haue been most miserable ? O how far are they from attributing any thing to their own metits , saue so far as they were meerly enabled therto by thy grace ? And how far short do they esteeme their deserts to be of the Glory , and Honour they receaue from thy Merciful and bountiful hand ? What pains , what labours , what suffering of disgraces can deserue to enioy thee , and see thee●ace ●ace to face ●or euer and euer ? Certainly those who enioy this happines , haue receaued it by the merits of thy most bitter death and Passion , which ( God graunt ) may bring me wretch also to Saluation . Amen .

O Loue , loue , loue , when shall nothing els liue in me but thy true loue my God ? how long shal I remaine deuided from thee ? When shal I by pure and perfect loue be vnited to my God , al impediments being remoued ?

When shal no created thing be able to diuert my soul from attending to my Lord God ? When shal I be able to suffer without offending my God , or being weary thereof .

O how little true peace doth that soul enioy who careth for the praises of men , or feareth their dispraises ; Nothing more slippery , nothing more vnconstant , nothing more vncertain then the fauour , or friendship of man , who to day wil be thy friend and extol thee to the skies ; to morrow none wil haue thee lesse in esteeme then he ; and what a misery then is it to place happines or security in the fauour of man ? And this ô my soul , thy God permits thee to see , to the end thou shouldst adhere to him alone , and not to that which is subiect to fail . Desire the friendship of God alone , and then his friends both in Heauen and earth shal be ready to serue thee for thy aduancement in his loue and seruice . What can any man diminish of thy good by his speaking , or thinking il of thee ? Or what can he add to thee indeed by highly esteeming of thee ?

Remember that al Praise is due vnto God , but to thee confusion of face for thy abominable sins . Giue al Glory vnto him , with out whom thou couldst not so much as-haue a being . My God , be thou Adored and Exalted by al , who art Blessed for euer and euer . Amen .

Thou , O sweet Iesu , hast pronounced with thine own blessed mouth , these words ? Consueor tibi Pater Domine Caeli & terrae , quia abscondisti haec à sapientibus & prudentibus , & re●elas̄ti ●ae par●ulis ; Ita Paeter , quoniam sic placitum fuit ante te . I confesse to thee Father Lord of Heauen and Earth , that thou hast hid these from the wise and prud●nt and reuealod them to little ones . Yea Father for so it wel pleased thee . These are the souls to whom thy yoke is sweet and thy burthen light these obserue and see in the light of thy truth that al thou dost , or ordainest is iust and true , and that it is our sin and ignorance only that peruerteth the order of thy Iustice . O let vs crie out to thee , and prepare our souls that in thy light we may see light . For it is not human wisedom , or knowledg that wil serue our turn to find out thee in the bottome of our soul , for which we were created , and for which our soul hath such a capacity , that the very Angels are amazed to see so great an honour and fauour to be offered and bestowed vpon so poor and frail a creature , and yet that we should turn a deaf eare to our beloued , who saieth , his delight is to be with the children of men . O how pittifully doth this most sweet and merci●ul God of ours lament our losse ☜ and misery of loosing that happines of enioying him in our souls in an ex●raordinary maner , yea euen in this life● if we did not cast away our loue and affect on vpon created things , neglecting and forgetting the noble capacity wherewith the hath most bountifully endued our souls : Hear therefor what he sayeth by his Prophet ; Ier. 2. 13. Be ye astonished , O Heauens vpon this , and the gates thereof , be ye extreamly desolate vpon it ; for two euils hath my people done , ( viz. ) They haue left and forsaken me the Fountain of liuing water , and haue digged for themselues cesternes : Cesterns that are broken , that are not able to hold waters . O wo is me my God , that I should thus haue ●orsaken thee ; Wha● meaneth this thy great Mercy ? I should haue lamented m●ne own misery ( of not only neglecting to seeke after thee alone , but also of most miserably offending thee infinit wa●es ) and thou bemoanedst my case as if some preiudice were therby to come to thee ! O what wouldst or couldst thou loose by my not being so happy as truly to seek after thy loue ? truly nothing , seeing thy Glory cannot be added to or diminish●d by my misery . But thy infinit Charity which brought ●hee into the world to suffer and dy for me , is the reason of thy mer●fful calling vpon my poor soul , to which thou hast said ; I wil not the the death of a sinner , but rather that he be conuerted and liue . In the hope of this promise I fly to thee : Thou who art able to do al th●ngs , helpe me that can do nothing : Thou knowst I haue placed al my hope and comfort in thee alone , and that I de●est al that is in me which is displeasing in thine eyes . Far be it from me to haue any other intention in any thing I do or omit , but simply to please thee . I renounce al inordinate affection to al created things whatsoeuer , and whatsoeuer I do that is not done sincearly for thy loue and honour , I most willingly submit my-self to any punishment thy iust and Merciful Iustice shal lay vpon me . Giue what ●hou commandst , and then exact what thou pleasest . O my God is it much I serue thee whom al the world is bound to serue ? ☞ O what is more sweet then to serue thee for loue , without any pretence of our own commodity for time , or eternity ? Truly in this lyeth hidden the greatest comfort that a soul banished from thee is capable of receauing : To ●hee who art the supreame and only true Good , by al creatures be al Praise eternally giuen . Amen .

This which next of al followeth she there writ , as taken out of S. Augustin , ( viz. ) I was not acquainted with that true interior Iustice , which iudgeth not by custome but by the righteous Law of Almighty God .

O My God , ap●d te est fons vi●ae , & in lumine tuo videbimus lumen ; Qui sequitur me , non ambulat in tenebris . With thee is the fountain of life , in thy light we shal see light , who followeth me walketh not in darknes , and they that walke not in thy light can neuer iudg of things according to thy iustice , but iudge according to custome , or their own sense . This true light is thy gift , and Grace , which thou only impartest in aboundance to t●e meek and humble of hart , and to those who endeauour to regard and seek thee alone in al their actions in simplicity , and sincerity of hart , and who intend thee only in al they do or omit .

( Vnderneath the picture there annexed of saint William Duke of Aquitain , she had written as followeth , viz.

O my God through the me●its and intercession of this most glorious Saint , be merciful to me sinner , and giue me grace to loue , and praise thee with al my soul and strength , and neither for time , or eternity to seek or desire any thing , but only thy-self alone simply , and purely by sincere and perfect loue , resting in thee my God aboue al gifts and creatures , and Adoring thee who art God Blessed for euer and euer . Amen . Amen .

Mans life on earth is a continuall warfar , and liuing but a short time , he is replenished with many miseries . Watch therefor and pray that you enter not into temptation . By Humility and Praier we shal be able to passe through any difficulties .

( To the image of death there annexed together with other ensei●nes of death , she added these following words , viz. )

O how little to be esteemed , or desired is al that passeth away with time .

( Thus far of her Deuotions written by her in her Breuiary within ihe year before she dyed . ]

HEERE FOLLOW SOME other Deuotions of the same pious soul D. Gertrude More .

A short Oblation of this smal work by the writer gatherer thereof to our most sweet and Merciful God . MT GOD to thee I dedicate This simple work of mine , And also with it hart and soul ; To be for euer thine . No other motiue wil I haue , Then by it thee to praise . And stir vp my poor frozen soul By loue it-self to raise . O I desir neither tongue , nor pen But to extol Gods praise , In which exces ●le melt away Ten thousand thousand ways● And as one that is sick with loue Engraues on euery Tree The Name and Praise of him she loues So shal it be with me .

IF the glorious light of thy Church Saint Augustin , whose hart was so inflamed with loue , that the whole world was a witnes thereof ( and euer wil be to thine honour from whom proceedeth al good . ) If he ( I say ) stood need of gathering out of thy Soly Scriptures and the writings of holy Saints , somewhat that might eleuate his mind to thee , when he grew more cold by reason of humain frailty ( as he professeth before his Manuel ) whose words I wil heerafter bring in as being most sweet to me ) wha● need then hath my poor soul to gather together certain deuout and amou●rous words , who scarsely in the reading thereof can lift vp my hart to thee ; but my hope is in thy Metcy , whi●h is aboue al thy works , and out of whi●h thou hast said by thy Prophet , Psal. 35. Men and beasts thou wilt saue . To this Mercy I fly , in this Mercy is al my comfort and consolation , I cast my-self into the arms of this thy Mercy and Pitty , I haue nothing wherein I can trust . Some haue suffered for thee in their body , others in their mind , others in both ; Some for thee haue taken great pains , and vndergon great labours and austerities , others by couradgiously ●upporting disgraces and miseries , haue become thereby most deare to thee , others while they were afflicted and persecuted , praied to thee for their enemies , and therby procured pardon for their own sins . But ala● my God , as for me , when I cast backe mine eyes vpon my life past , I can find nothing done or suffered by me wherin I can hope , wherein I can trust . Al those things which I behold others daily to practise , are , far fromme , I haue liued in this house , ( of whom I may truly say ; Psal. 23. Haec est generatio quaerentium faciem Dei Iacob . This is the generation of those that seek the face of the God of Iacob ) vnmindful and vngrateful to the God of Iacob ; yea my whole life hath been ful of sin and iniquity , and without end or measure haue my offences been against thee ; yea iustly maist thou condemn me to the bo●tomlesse pitty of hel . But yet I wil hope in thee . I am sorry from the very bottom of my hart that euer I offended thee , or straied from thee . Behold I now consecrate my-selfa new body and soul to thee , take away from my soul what therein displeaseth thee . Al thy Angels , and Saints be intercessors for me , especially thy deare Mother , the faithful helper and Aduocate of vs sinners .

TO OVR BLESSED LADY the Aduocate of sinners . AL hail , O Virgin , crownd with stars , and M one vnder thy feet , Obtaine vs pardon of our sinnes of Christ our Sauiour sweet . For though thou art Mother of my God , yet thy Humility Disdaineth not this simple wretch , that flyes for helpe to thee . Thou knowst thou art more deare to me , ●hen any can expres●e , And th●t I do congratulate with ioy thy happinesse ; Who art the Queen of Heauen and earth , thy helping hand me lend , That I may loue and praise my God , and haue a happy end . And though my sins me terrify , yet hoping stil in ●hee I find my soul refreshed much when I vnto thee fly . For thou most willingly to God p●titions dost prese●t , And dost obtain much grace for vs in this our ba●nishment . The honour and the glorious praise by al be giuen ●o thee , Which I●sus t●y beloued Son or●aind e●ern●lly For thee , whom he exalts in heauen aboue the Ange●s al , And whom we find a Patronesse , when vnto thee we c●l . Amen . O Mater Dei , ●e ●ento mei . Amen .

As also my good Angel , S. Ioseph . Saint Iohn Euangelist , S. Martin , S. Augustin , S. Thomas of Aquin , and thou my most holy Father S. Benet .

To our most Holy Father Saint BENEDICT . MOst glorious Father in whose School , I liue and hope to dye , God grant I may obserue thy Rule , for in that al doth lye . For no perfection can be named , which vs it doth not teach . O happy she , who in her soul , the sense thereof doth reach ! But many praise Obedience` and thy humility , And yet conceaue not as they should , what either of them be . The simple humble louing souls only the sense find out Of any discret obedient Rule , and these are void of doubt . Yea vnder shadow of thy wings they vp to heauen● fly , And tast heere in this vaile of teares what perfect peace doth lye , Hid in perform●nce of thy Rule that leadeth vnto heauen ; O happy souls who it performe , the ways so sweet and euen ! By Prayer and Patience its fulfilled , Charity , Obedience , By seeking after God alone , and giuing none offence . The more I looke vpon thy Rule , the more in it I find , O do to me the sense vnfold , For letter makes vs blind ! And blessed , yea a thousand times , Be thou who it hast writ , And thy sweet blessing giue to them , who truly performe it . For those are they which wil conserue this house in perfect peace , Without which al we do , is lost , and al that s good wil cease . And praised be our glorious God , who gaue to thee such grace , Not only him thy-self to seeke , but also out to trace A way so easy and secure , if we wil but thee heare , To haue relation to our God , who is to vs so neere , For at this thou dost chiefly aime , that God our souls do teach . O if we did truly obey , he would by al things preach His wil to vs by euery thing that did to vs befal ; And then as thou desirst it should he would be al in al - O pray deare Father that he euer be , our only loue and al eternally . Amen .

Saint Scholastica , S. Gertrude , and in fine al in heauen , or on earth that are pleasing to thee , be pleased to make me partaker of their merits and praiers ; and aboue al wash me in thy pretious Bloud , one drop whereof had been sufficient to haue redemed a thousand worlds . In this is my hope and confidence , by this I hope to be enriched with al that is wanting in me : For , in that thou art and possessest , I more reioyce and exult , then if I had whatsoeuer in earth , or in heauen I could desire at my command . In this ioy I cry out withal my hart , with al my soul , and with al my strengh : O how much good , and happines do I possesse , seeing my God , ( who is more my-self then I my-self am ) doth possesse so infinit Glory , Maiesty , and so infinit good things : for indeed I haue , and hold him more mine own , then any thing that euer I had , or held heertofore . This is the comfott of my pouerty and the repose of my labour . This my most delightful , most amiable , most bright and beawtiful , and most Glorious God , is always present with me , to heare my praises and receaue my petitions . In him I am rich , though in my felf I am poore and contemptible . To him my most louing God , be giuen now and euer al Laud and Praise , and Glory , by al in heauen and earth for euer and euer . Amen .

These Collections once more I offer to thee my God , and those that in perusing thereof are moued thereby to loue and praise thee , be they my ( Go● ) mindful of me in their holy prayers , which are most pleasing to thee . And I also desire that some wil out of their Ch●rity reade these things to me which heerafter follow , when sicke to death● shal be becompassed with those fears and terrors which ordinarily accompany that dreadful hower ; at which time , as al o●her , be thou my helper and Protector● and in the Bowels of thy Mercy Good Father , rem●mber me poor begger , and from heauen send me now and at my departure thy Grace which may bring me to thee where I may with al thy Elect , Praise● Adore and worship thee for euer and euer .

An acte of Contrition , partly taken ou● of the words of blessed S. Augustin .

1. O LORD I confesse I haue sinned aboue the sands of the Sea in number , yet such is the greife which I take thereat , that I wil not refuse to suffer any kind of pun●shment for th● same . O Iesus , whatsoeuer thy wil shal be that I should do , I desire to performe it according to thy holy wil. I haue nothing to offer vnto thee , but a hart willing to do whatsoeuer thou●ouldst ●ouldst haue me .

2. H●er I offer my-self bound both hand , and foot , and I lye prostrate at thy feet crauing pardon for my abominable sins and offences .

3. I fly not away , I appeale not from thy sentence , o●herwise then from thy Iustice to thy Mercy which we sinners do daily experience to be aboue al thy works .

4. I do not plead to be released of any punishment , but rather that thou maist iudge me according to thine own Blessed wil , only let me not be separated from thee .

O thou thy-self dost say to vs : Thou wilt not sinners death , But that we do conuert and liue euen while our souls haue breath , And no more then to cease to be canst thou ( O God ) refuse To pardon humble penitents that do themselues accuse , Being no accepter of persons al hauing cost thee deare , Yea euen thy very life ; it-self how can I therefor fear ? If euer yet he did disdain sinners that fled to him , Then had I little cause of hope , but this was neuer seen . Fo● if they doe return to thee , thy hart thou wilt not close , As witnes can my wretched soul , who was so like to lose Al grace and goodnes ( if thou hadst not me with helpe preuented ) By sins that would with bloudy teares , be while I liue lamented , If I as grateful were to thee , as thou deseruest I should , Or as another in my case vuto thy mercy would . But thou whiles that thou liuedst heer , by tokens plain didst shew , That none should be refused by thee , who dost in mercy flow . And that my wicked hart did proue , who after ●ins so many Hath found much fauour in thine eys , without deseruing any . O blessed euer be my God , for this preuenting grace , Which I vnwor●●y haue receaud in this most happy place . I fled from thee by many sins , and thou didst follow me , As if my ruin would haue causd some detriment to thee . How can this choose but wound my hart , when I remember it , And euer serue to humble me , while at thy feet I sit ? From whence my Lord , my God , and al , permit me not to rise , til I do loue thee as thou wouldst , the which doth al comprise .

5. I know thou wilst not the death of a sinner , but rather that I be conuerted and liue .

6. Be pacified therefor I beseech thee for thine own sa●e , and receaue me into thy fauour , looke vpon thine own wounds , and let them plead my pardon ; do not for euer blot me out of ●he book of life , but rather giue me grace , faithfully heerafter to serue and please thee .

7. I know it is reason , that one who hath been so vngrateful to thy Supreame Maiesty , as I haue been should humbled , despise and willingly abase himself euen at the feet of al creatures , which thy sweet Goodnes grant me to do , that I may heerafter find sauour in thine eyes , who be blessed and praised by al for euer . Amen .

O sweet Iesus to whom nothing is impossible but not to be merciful to the miserable ; forgiue me mine offence ; I am sorry from the bottom of my hart that euer I offended thee , or contradicted thy holy wil ; but I know thou canst forgiue more then I can offend , which maketh me confident of being receaued into thy fauour , though thy most aboundant Mercy ; to whom my God be giuen al Laud. Honour , and Praise , by al creatures in heauen and in earth for euer and euer● Amen .

O amiable Iesus behold al thy creatures do inuite and exhort me to yeald th●e praises for al thy benefits , which haue been ( I must ackowledg ) without end or measure towards me thy vnworthy creature . Euery creature doth in their kind sing and set forth thy great Goodnes , inuiting me to loue only thee ; and yet behold how cold and dul I am in Louing , Praising , and Exalting thee ! O what shal I say ? but cry out to thee , who art my hope , my help , my Loue , my life and Al ; yea my Father , my Spouse , and my God , to grant thy Grace may not be void in me after so many infinit benefits ! O be thou heerafter the only desire and ioy of my soul. Let me look after nothing but thee , loue nothing but thee , let me night and day sigh and long after thee my beloued . Let it suffice me to haue my inteutions and proceedings only approued by thee . O let me honour , and respect al for thy sake , howsoeuer they treate me ; for my ingratitude hath been so great to thee , that al creatures as wel go●d as bad , may iustly despise me , and do thee great honour thereby . I offer thee therefor thine own merits seeing I haue none of mine own , for those that shal any way reuenge thy quarrel by afflicting her , who deserueth nothing but hel for hauing so often offended thee .

After something which she had collected out of the following of Christ concerning Prayer . she writ as followeth .

O MY Lord God , how much do thy Saints praise and commend the holy Exercise of Praier . O how happy are ●hose that haue no other study , or care , then how to extol , and praise thy Diuine Maiesty , and in Humility of hart to make their necessities known vnto thee , who art the Father of Mercies , & Dius totius consolationis , qui consolatur nos in omni tribulatione nostra . And the God of al consolation , who comforts vs in al our tribulation . To whom should we sinners fly , but to thee my God ? who didst thou euer reiect that lamented and w●s sory for their sinnes ? Nay did not publicans , and harlots finde thee more willing to forgiue , then they could be to aske for pardon ? Thou who forgauest S. Peter , S. Mary Magdalen , S. Augustin and infinit others their sinnes and offences , be merciful to me , who groaneth in spirit against my-self , to see , and remember that I haue made no more hast to conclude an euerlasting peace and league with thee , O my God !

To thee now al the powers of my scattered , defiled , and deformed soul , doth aspire .

Behold I do extol now thy deare seruice to the skie ; professing and protesting that there is no liberty so sweet , as to be bound and obliged by vowes to serue thee for loue .

Thou true and most blessed God , how didst thou with a most sweet and seuere kind of Mercy , receaue , chek , and conuince me , straying , and flying from thee , by shamefully seeking that in thy creatures , which is only to be found in thee , to wit , comfort , and peace ?

O Lord , I am thy seruant ; say vnto my soul , I am thy Saluation , and al that is within me shal say ; Quis similis tibi , Deus meus . Who is like vnto thee my Lord God .

Behold , I haue had an auersion from al that which thou louest , and an inclination to al which thou hatest : But thou hast broken my bands , and I wil offer thee a Sacrifice of Praise , submitting henceforth my stifneck to thine easy yoke , and my shoulders to thy light but then .

Vnderneath a picture of B. Iohn de Cruce , she writ as followeth , viz.

O Blessed and pure Saint , pray for me sinful wretch , who am not worthy to cal vpon thee , yet coafiding in thine inflamed charity , I commit and commend my-self to thy sweet protection now and at the dreadful howre of my death , remember me I beseech thee . Amen .

( To some Collections which she drew out of S. Augustins Confessions , she added as followeth . )

Good God be merciful to mine iniquities for this deare Saints sake of thine , whose Humility doth so astonish me , that I cannot choose but cry with a loud voice in my hart , O how admirable art thou in thy Saints ? What are his whole Books of Confessions , but a profound acknowledgment of his sinnes , which he doth not only confesse to thee , but to al the world , to the end that al may perpetually praise thy Mercy ? But O my God for this Humility of his , thou hast highly exalted him : for which be thou eternally magnified and praised by al creatures . He was one of those sinners for whose conuersation , There was more ioy in Heauen , then vpon ninty nine Iust ; and not without great cause , seeing he was to be a chief pillar in thy Church , and one who might and did draw infinit sinners by his words and writings out of the mire and dreggs of sinne , and taught them to submit themselues to thiue easy yoke , and to se●ue thee for loue , and to glory in nothing but thee . Yea what is wanting in his words , that may inuite our souls to loue thee with al our harts , with al our strengths , and our neighbour as our selues ? Who can spea●e in the words of thine own Oracles more comfortably to sinners then he hath done ? ●n fine h●s words are so amorously sweet in thy Praises , that euen my frozen soul had been melted there● by into thy praise . He for thy sake be an Aduocate and Intercessor to thee for me , the most sinful , and contemptible of al th● seruants , he I say , to whom many sinnes w●re forgiuen , because he loued much , whom I desire together with al the Celestial Court , to Adore , and Praise thee for me , who am not worthy to name thee who be euer blessed . Amen .

In a Collection which she was making out of the Booke of Psalmes , she added to some verses as followeth .

Psal. 23. vers. 6.

THis is the generation of them that seeke h●m : of them that seek the face of the God of Iacob ( I pray God it may proue so with vs to his Honour and Glory )

●s●l . 31. ve●s . ●0 .

I wil giue thee vnderstanding : and wil instruct thee in the way t●at thou shalt go , I w●l fasten mine eyes vpon thee . ( who is not wholy inflamed with a desire to seeke after God alone , to heare such a promise from his own mellifluous mouth . )

Psal. 35. vers. 10.

Because with thee is the fountain of life : and in thy light we shal see light . ( I beseech al those deuout souls that shal peruse this book , to labour carefully for that light which the Prophet heer speaketh of ; which proceedeth from loue , ☜ and not from human wisedom . This light , ( by which we shal discerne truth from falshood ) is gotten by conuer●ing with Almighty God , and humbling our selues vnder his mighty hand . This light hath taught many their way to God , that could neither write nor read . Sweet Iesus make vs of the number of these little ones to whom this light is reuealed which is hidden from the wise and prudent ; which is bestowed vpon those that faithfully adhere to God , and not on those that glory rather in themselues them in him . He be Blessed and Praised by al , for euer and euer . Amen .

Psal. 86. vers. 5.

Reueale thy way to our Lord and hope in him : and he wil do it . ( A comfortable saying for those that God permits stil to remain ( do wh●t they can ) in their imperfections .

v. 7. Haue no emulation in him that appeareth in his way : v. 6. Be subiect to our Lord and pray him . ( Note this wel . )

v. 11. The meeke shal inherit the land : and shal be delighted in multitude of peace . ( If we truly labour for his peace , ( which is in much Patience ) the God of Peace wil be amongst vs . )

v. 25. When he shal fal he shal not be bruised , because our Lord putteth his hand vnder . ( O what an incouradgment is this to a poore frail soul ; Let vs notwithstanding our imperfections , confidently , and amo●ously when we fail , hope in his Mercy , and then He wil heal and helpe vs , who makes vs so many sweet promises . Who be blessed by al creatutes for euer and euer . Amen .

v. 26. I haue been yong ( for I am old ) and I haue not seene the iust forsaken , nor his seed seeking bread . ( Why do we distruct then , who haue dedicated our selues wholy to God , fearing ro depend only of his diuine Prouiden●e , ☜ which is the greatest happines in this world , and so much to be desired if we had so much loue , and couradge as we should .

Psal. 38 v. 8.

Doubtles al things are vanity euery man liuing . O my poor soul , take good notice of this verse ; Adhere to our Lord whose years neuer fail , and whose helpe is alwaies at hand Giue that to God that is Gods , and that to Caesar that is Caesars : marke what the Prophet faith in the same Psalme , viz. And now what is my Expectation , is it not our Lord ? and my substance is with thee .

Psal. 39. vers. 15.

But thou O Lord make not thy considerations far from me : thy Mercy and thy truth haue alwayes receaued me . ( O be thou euer blessed for it by al creatures , my God and Al. Amen .

Psal. 40. vers. 1.

Blessed is the man that vnderstandeth concerning the needy and the poor : in the euil day our Lord wil deliuer him . ( O my poor soul , though thou hast not where with to releeue the poor in th● i● hūger & thirst ; yet dispaire not to gaine this blessing that our Lord wil prot●ct thee in the euil day , which thou standest so much need off . For , to pray for those that afflict thee , and render good for euil to those that molest thee , and being a comfort in al thou canst imagin , to those that are afflicted either in body or in m●nd without exception of persons , is included in the gaining of that most to be desired promise . ☞ Remember with ioy , and imitate the best thou art able , the happy example of the late blessed Bishop of Geneua , of whom it is reported , that one in his diocese exce●dinly molesting , afflict●ng , and persecuting this holy Saint , yét he vsed him with al loue , gentlenes , and respect ; yea more then any other person . At which patient proceeding of his one of his subiects wondr●ng at , and speaking to him of it , asked him how he could vse that man so mildly , who neuer requited him with other then il turnes for al the grace he shewed him , being as it were top ful of bitternes against him To which the Saint humbly answ●ered , O ●a●th he , if he should put out one of mine eyes I woul smile vpon him w●h the other . I beseech thee my God for thy own sake , grant thy vnworthiest seruant grace to imi●ate this example ; though to speake truly , none can do her an iniury , who deserueth so much in punishment for her sinnes .

Psal. 41. vers 6. and 7.

Wby art thou sorrowful my soul ? and why dost thon trouble me ? Hope in God ; because yet I wil confesse to him : the saluation of my coun●●nance , and my God . ( O my soul , hope in thy God , who can do al things ! O blessed Hope and Confidence , which is able to obtain al things , and ouercome al things .

v. 11. In the day our Lord hath commanded his Merey : and in the night a song of him . Dost thou not hear my soul , t●y Lord doth require of thee ? Mercy towards thy euen Christian , for that he sheweth to thee . And that night and day thou w●lt sing his Praise . But Lord thou knowst that thy Praise is not seemly in the mouth of a sinner . What then shal I do ? O , hope in thy Mercy !

Certaine ●omfortable sayings , taken out of the holy Scripture ; for the encouradgment of those that desire with all their harts to Loue and please our most merciful God , and first out of the Prophet Isaie .

Chap. the first .

Verse 16. WASH you , be cleane : take away the euil of your cogitations from mine eyes : C●ase to do peruersly .

17. Learne to do good : Seek iudgment , succour the oppressed , iudge for pupil , defend the widow . And come , and accuse me , saith our Lord .

18. If your sins shal be as scarlet , they shal be made as whit as snow : and if they be as red as vermilion , they shal be whit as wool .

19. If you be willing : and wil hear me , you shal eat the good things of the earth .

22. Thy siluer is turned into drosse : thy wine is mingled with water . ( But hear what followeth , O my soul , and therefor be not discomforted though al thou dost and sufferest be very imperfect ; yet behold what he promiseth who can do al things . If he wil , he can make thee clean . If he command , the wind and sea wil be stil , and there wil e●sue a calme . Commit thy ●elf to him , and he wil helpe thee when he thinketh fit . O God , thy wil be done therefor in me for euer and euer . Amen .

25. I wil turn my hand to thee . and boyle out thy dr●ss●●il it be pure : and wil take away al thy tin●e .

26. A●ter these things thou shalt be called the Iust , a faithful City .

( Shal I feare to be forsaken by thee my God , after al these sweet promises ? No , I wil hope in the multitude of thy Mercies . Though I haue hitherto sinued against Heauen and before thee , so that I am not worthy to be called thy child ; yet let me eat of the crumes which fal from my Maisters table , that I may grow stronger heerafter in resisting that which maketh me displeasing in thy pure eyes . Hear , my Lord the voyce of a sinner , which would faine loue t●ee , and with her hart and soul as greatly please the as euer she bath offended thee . Let me either loue , or not li●e . I know thy Merci●s are so great , that t●ou hast admitted those to eat of the bread of Angels , which hertofore fed of Huskes like swine ; yea S. Gertrude saith , that the more base , vile , and contemptible the creature is to whom thou shewest mercy , the more extolled art t●ou by al thine Angels , and Saints in Heauen . I wil therefore hope in thee , and beseech al t●y Saints to pray for me , and praise t●ee for taking pitty of me , who am not worthy to cast vp`mine eyes to Heauen much les to thinke vpon , or praise t●ee . To thee O my God and al my desire be giuen perpetual Praise and Adoration for al eternity by al creatures ! Amen .

CHAP. II.

Verse 3. COme let vs go vp to the Mount of our Lord , and to the house of the G●d of Iacob : and he wil teach vs his waies a●d we shal walke in his ●athes .

5. Hou●e of Iacob come ye : and let vs walke in the light of our Lord . ( O my God , happy are they that walke in this light . In this light none walke but the Humble and cleane of hart , and those that serue thee for loue , whose ioy thou thy-self art , and who sing with the Prophet : Rennit consolari anima mea . My soul refused to be comfor●ed . These do in some sorte more or lesse as thou pleasest , find how sweet and happy a thing it is to seeke , and sigh after thee alone . Return , my soul , to thy beloued ; return , seek for no consolation , but put thy hope in God . Commit thy-self vnto God , and let him do with thee what pleaseth him . Neuer seeke thine owne glory ; neuer desire thy wil may be done : but in al things intend , loue , and preferre the Glory and wil of God . If any come vnto him , he shal not return empty , because he willngly giueth water to the thirsty . In the bowels of thy Mercy my God , remember me poor begger , born and liuing in blindnes . Grant me that I may see and walke in ●hy light , that my soul may become truly pleasing to thee , O my Lord God , whom only I desire to loue , serue and praise , make me in al things conformable to thy holy wil , who be blessed for euer and euer . Amen . Amen . Amen●

Scio cui credidi , & certus sum● I know whom I ha●e trusted and am secure , saith S. Paul . O glorious S. Augustin my deare Patron , whom from my infancy ( in my poor mauer ) I haue honoured in a particular maner , and who hast been alwaies ready to assist me in calling vpon thee , I beseech thee for the loue of him , by whose loue thy hart was so inflamed , to assist me at the hour of my death , and obtaine for me of our Lord , that liuing and dying I may be wholy conformable to his Blessed wil ; neither desiring for time , or eternity any other thing , then that his diuine pleasure be perfectly accomplished in me , his vnworthy , & vngrateful creature . And in that dreadful houre of my death , obtain for me wretched sinner , confidence in his Mercies which are ( as thou knowst ) aboue al his works . I am not worthy to loue : but he is worthy of al loue and Adoration . I cannot without great ioy remember these following words of the Prophet I saie ; hoping his Goodnes wil for his own sake giue me leaue to apply them to me poor and sinful soul , though I desetu● nothing of my-self ; neuer hauing done him any faithful seruice in al my life .

Chap 43. v. 1. And now thus saith our Lord that created thee and formed thee : Feare not , because I haue redeemed thee , and called thee by thy name , Thou art mine .

2. When thou shalt passe through the waters I wil be with thee , and the flouds shal not couer thee : when thou shalt walke in fire , thou shalt not be ●u●ned , and the flame shal not ●urn in● thee . ( O blessed Saint make intercession for me , that I may be confident in him , who thus aboundeth with Mercy . Amen . )

3. Because I am the Lord thy God the Holy one of Israel thy Sauiour .

4. Since thou becamest honourable in mine eyes and glorious I haue loued thee .

5. Feare not , becaus I am with thee .

6. And euery one that inuocateth my name for my glory I haue created him , formed him , and made him .

8. Bring forth the blind people , and hauing eyes , the deaf and he that ●ath eares :

9. Let them giue their witnes & be iustified .

10. In very deed you are my witnes saith our Lord , and my seruants whom I haue chosen , that you may know and beleeve me and vnderstand that I my self am .

11. I am , I am the Lord , and there is no Sauiour beside me , and there is not that can deliuer out of my hand .

16. Thou saith our Lord that gaue away in the Sea , and a pa●h in the v●h●men● waters .

18. Remember not former things , and looke not on things of old . I am he that takes cleane away thine iniquities for mine own sake , and I wil not remember thy sins .

26. Bring me into remembrance , and let vs be iudged together . Tel me if thou ●aue any thing that maiest be iustified .

Hethertho the words of the Prophet I saie .

S. Iohn 2. v. 12. I writ to you litle children , becaus your sins are forgiuen you for his name . And now my children abid in him , that when he shal appeare we may haue confidence and not be confounded of him in his coming . My dearest beleeue not euery spirit ; and euery spirit that dissolueth Iesus is not of God .

Feare is not Charity , but perfect Charity casteth out feare . Let vs therefore loue God : becaus God loued vs . This is the Charity of God that we keep his Commandments : and his Commandments are not beauty .

O infinit Goodnes , who art Charity it-self , powre thy Grace aboundantly into my poor foul . I inuoke thee my God , by the merits , and intercession of al thy Saints in Heauen , and seruants on earth ; to haue mercy on me now in this my last extreamity . Al I desire is , that in life and death I may be disposed of according to the multitude of t●y most aboundant Mercies a fountain neuer drawn dry● Al my ioy is in that thou art , my God , and that I am at thy disposing . Though I am poor in al vertnes , yet I am confident to be partaker of thy Merits , ó sweet Iesus which thou liberally bestowest , according to thy wil and pleasure ! O be thou blessed in al thou disposest ! O my God , who art al I desire . Into thy hands I commend my spirit , who art blessed for euer . Amen .

The most learned of D. S. Augustin saith .

Ai● eruditissimus Doctorum Augustinus . O eternal Truth , and true Charity , and O aeterna veritas & vera Charitas , Deare Eternity . Thou art my God to thee & chara Eteruitas . Tu es Deus meus , I suspire day and night ! This is that subliue Tibi suspiro die ac nocte . Hic est sublimis ille . Contemplatiue Augustine . Contemplator Augustinus .

Cuius cor Charitas Christi vulnerauera● : whose hart the Charity of Christ had wounded . O my deare Sa●nt , whose great Humility , I can neuer to much praise and admire : pray for her to whom thou hast been in her greatest afflictions and mi●eries euen as a Father and Mother ; for which be exhibited honouur to thee by the most sweet hart of IESVS our Sauior , the Son of the liuing God : by which and from which doth most aboundant sweetnes flow to al the elect . In the power that he gaue thee , being one by whom he bound , and loosed sinners , giue an aboundant benediction to thy poore seruant , and beg of my God that I may neuer seek or intend any thing for time or eternity , but his honour and Glory and that I may so humble and subiect myself vnder his mighty hand , tha● for his loue I may will●ngly submit my-self in what maner he pleases to al creatures . Let me commit , and commend my-self to thy protection , who art a careful receauer of al my petitions , and who art one who in a most particular maner God● hath giuen me confidence in , in al ●he necessities wherein my soul doth stand need of an Aduocat and friend . O happy change to leaue al friends on earth to find the more certaiu & assured friends and Intercessors in Heauen , who are neuer absent , neuer vncertain , nor euer do they fail as those in this world are subiect to do ! Be therefor mindful of me I beseech thee , in my life & also in my last extremity ; and remember , that when affrighted with the multitude and greiuoushes of my sinnes and imperfections , I durst scarsely cast vp mine eyes to Heauen , or cal vpon God and his Blessed Mother , who might iustly disdain so vngrateful and contemptible a creature ; Yet by thy meanes , and being incouradged by thy example , and reading thy life and books so ful of Con●idence and sweetnes● I found my hart lightned , and my spi●it refreshed , and my soul exceedingly comforted , finding in thee and by thee expressed , what a good God we haue , and that as his Mercies are aboue al his works , so he is able to forgiue more then we can offend . Thou knowest , thy very name , when I am sad and afflicted , doth refresh me to behold it , and seemeth to smile vpon me in my miseries , assuring me of ●hy helpe in al my soul standeth need of thee , in this my pilgrimage and ban shment from my God , who is my only loue , life , desire , and al my happines . T● whom for euer be al Glory , Honour , an● Ado●ation , by al as wel on earth , as in Hea●en● and whom , by his sweet Mercy and thy intercession , I desire and hope to loue , and s●rue for euer and euer , Amen .

Omnes qui habebant infir●os ducebant illes ad Iesum , & sanaba●●ur . Luk 4.40 . Al that had diseased brought th●m to Iesus , and they were cured● To whom therefor should I fly in my manifold infirmities , but to thee my Iesus , my Go● , and my Sauiour ? Who is worthy o● our loues , our thoughts , our harts , and our souls , but thy own self my Lord , who made vs for this alone , that by true sincer● affection we should adhere to thee , the chiefe and supreame Good ? O woe is me , i● for any intention , or for any creatures sake whatsoeuer ; I should do any thing with other intention willingly , then to please and become inwardly in the bottom of my sou● vnited to thee , heer by grace , and in Heauen for al eternity . Al things and creatures fail , only t●y-self art constant , thou art alwaye● present , alwaies willing to helpe thy poor seruants , & euer ready ●o cure our wounds● which through human frailty by sin we daily cause in our souls .

Let vs who haue been greiuous sinners , and do so aboundantly experience thy Mercy , giue great and continual praise to thee our God , who hath sweetly redeemed vs to thy-self in the Bloud of Iesus thy Sonne the immaculate Lambe , giuing vs therby hope of remission of our innumerable sins . Great art thou O Lord , and exceeding worthy of al Praise . O let al things Adore and Exalt my God , with al their soul , and strength . What other study , what other endeauour● or what other desire , shal possesse my soul willingly day , or night ; but that I may in al , and aboue al things , praise , and loue my God . As nothing is superior to a soul but thy self , so nothing but thou can satisfy and satiat our souls in Heaue● o● earth ; nothing I say but thy-self , to whom ouly let my hart ●ende , and only in al things intend . Thou being the only true and proper Center of our hart and soul , what can make this miserable banishment ( where to my greife I daily offend thee ) tolerable to me , but only to aspire to thee by sighs , desires , and vnspeakable groanes , in my hart and soul ? O let true loue vnite me to thee , who art by al Adored and Praised for al eternity in thy Heauenly contrey . Amen .

Some speeches of heathen Consuls and Philosophers , which shew Christians their duty & also their happines in knowing how to make good vse of their knowledge to their Saluation , in which those Heathens perished , beca●s they did not beleeue and acknowledg our Lord God ; but vanish away in their own cogitations , by seeking only fame , honour , and applause of the people , &c. which yet in their wisedom they saw to be but an vncertain vanity .

AND first . The answer of one of the greatest and wi●est of them ; when he wa● offered power , and honour , and sacrifice , according to their custome of vsing such as for wisedome nobility , and couradg deserued it in their eyes .

The more ( saith he ) I conside● with myself of things done bo●h in old and later times , the more the vncertainties and vanities of fortune in al moral affaires o●cur●e to my rememhrance , and the more plainly doth their vanity appeare vnto me . ( O my God , what a de●inition is heer of a heathen , which did not so much as know thee , or for what end this vncertainty was in them permitted by thee . What a shame is it , if we who are not only Christians but religious should esteem or seek after any thing but thee , in whom alone is stabili●y to be found and enioyed ? One hing is necessary . ☞ Let chance , fortun , & power ( where it is giuen by thee ) d●spose of al things as they wil , as for me , I w●l sing in al occurrences ; It is good for me to adhere to my Lord God , th● only desire and beloued of my soul and hart . I wil hau● no care or study , but how I may in al chances spend my whole forc●s and strength in his Praise , who be Adored prostrat by al creatures for euer and euer , Amen . Amen .

ANOTHER SAID .

Such as stand in feare , are irresolute in al their determinations . ( He spoake it of those who out of feare to displease , and desire to please for human respects , became ●hereby a slaue to euery ones humour , and keept not their freedom and liberty , which was got by suppressing of natural passions .

Another speaking in a controuersy where one was to be iudg of two accusing on another , ☜ and defending themselues before the Senate , saith , The truth or thing beleeued , and wrested to the worst , are easi●y to be discerned by one iudg if he be vise , vpright , and iust , and not interrested in nei●her side .

Also another said . That the disloyal are odious euen to those whose instruments they are : Of a little beginning , comes often great incōuenience , which might be preuented by doing as one of the Heathens d●d , who excelled most of his time in Nobi●ity , wisedom and al moral vertues , who had so great temper ouer his affections and passions , that neither for honour ( as being offered to be made a King ) nor for gain , ☜ would he be false to his P●i●ce , who yet fauoured him ●o little by reason he was so much honoured by al the common wealth● that he gaue way to haue him poisoned at thirty years of age , he being also his own father that was Caesar. He was so iust , that in mat●ers of the greatest controuersy he alwaies did true Iustice , and his enemy whom he knew sought his death , he honoured as his Partner , being yet in nobility much his inferior , but boare rule with him at Caesars command . This enemy being once at a bāquet with him where most of the Nobility were present , he vttered s●ch disgraceful words and speaches of him to his face , that al were amazed to see him not so much as change his coun●enance at him . And after this , hearing he was in distresse at Sea , he sent his own Conuoy to deliuer him from drowning , though he knew his iourney was to accuse him to Caesar and the Senat , and also to plot his death , which indeed heat last achiued , being both at one Bancquet not long af●er : which example sheweth vs how amiable vertue is euen in the very Heathens , in whom it was but moral , ●how much ought we to practise it , in whom by Charity it becometh Diuine ? O how truly glorious are they my God , who indeed posses thy loue , which so worthily by holy Scripture is tearmed , most Honourable wisedome ? But alas to humain frailty it is hard to put vp iniuries , much more to do good for euil , at least nature suggesteth to vs , that it is vnpleasant , and therefore vrgeth vs , ☞ not to put vp this , or that , least those who are contrary to vs do add difficulty vpon difficulty , seeing we put it vp so quietly . But this pretence of nature is so fals , and oft , euen in humain respects , so inconuenient , whilst we by disputing , resisting or in the like maner requiting , do draw grater incō●eniences vpon our selues , where as quietly ●erting it passe , it would soon come to nothing . Nayfarther I wil speak & add this to the honour of my Lord God , whose way of vertue and the Cross is so sweet in comparison of the way of sin , and yealding to our passions● that if he had neuer intended other reward for those that Humbly practise vertue , and go the way of Resignation , but that they receaue in this life ; he could not haue been taxed of too sleightly rewarding their labour . For certainly the peace that followeth doing good● for euil , and yeelding sweet , ( for bitter , and passing al difficulties humbly and patiently ouer , is much more pleasant , then by hauing ful power to do vpon such occasions the quite contrary . Such is the very nature of al his exactions and ordinations , that euen the very effect of them , maketh them worthy to be loued desired , ond practised . For who can consider of al vertues , ☜ ●ad not see how great a happines lieth hid in the true practise of them euen in this life ? As for example , Iustice , Patience , Benigni●y , Longanimity , Charity , and true Discretion accompanied with vnfained humility , who doth not see that these & the like vertues , make vs pleasing to Go● , and man , & that the not practising them doth make vs troublesom to others , and aboue al to ou● selues ? Giue vs , O my God , al those v●rtues which make souls so pleasing in thy diuine eyes ! Let not the very Infidels & Heathē , be our accusers , who practised that out of the light of nature which we omit in this happy time of Grace . Shal they contemn the world , and shal we desire the base pleasures and cōtentments thereof ? Shal they fly into dens , & caues to get wisdom & learning , & shal nor we be contented to be forgotten by al the world ? Shal they do good for euil , & we do euil for good , and put vp nothing for loue of thee ? Shal they subdue their passions and affections to become maisters of their souls , and shal not we do it● who by it may come to haue the freer accesse to thee in our souls ? O no , far be it from vs , my Lord & my God● but rather let our souls draw no brea●● but to aspire to thee by true loue . Let vs adhere to thee , and to no created thing whatsoeuer , that we may for euer & euer be vnited to thee , who created vs for that end , for which be thou Blessed and Praised eternally . Amen .

Thus wrote our pious soul D. C●rtrude More , vpon these sayings and doings of those Hea●hen Philosophers .

FINIS . LAVS DEO .

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