The last will and testament of Father Petres. This text is an enriched version of the TCP digital transcription B06902 of text S100429 in the English Short Title CatalogTextual changes and metadata enrichments aim at making the text more computationally tractable, easier to read, and suitable for network-based collaborative curation by amateur and professional end users from many walks of life. The text has been tokenized and linguistically annotated with MorphAdorner. The annotation includes standard spellings that support the display of a text in a standardized format that preserves archaic forms ('loveth', 'seekest'). Textual changes aim at restoring the text the author or stationer meant to publish. This text has not been fully proofread Approx. 4 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 1 1-bit group-IV TIFF page image. EarlyPrint Project Evanston,IL, Notre Dame, IN, St. Louis, MO 2018 B06902 Interim Tract Supplement Guide C.20.f.2[322] 99886985 ocm99886985 181643 2240885238

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 Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 2, no. B06902) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 181643) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books; Tract supplement ; A1:1[325]) The last will and testament of Father Petres. 1 sheet ([1] p.). s.n., [S.l. : 1688?] Verse: "In his holyness name ..." Date suggested by date of publication of Wing L518A. Reproduction of original in the British Library. eng Petre, Edward, 1631-1699 -- Humor -- Early works to 1800. eebo The last will and testament of Father Petres. anon 1688 1 661 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 A This text has no known defects that were recorded as gap elements at the time of transcription. 2008-10 Assigned for keying and markup 2008-12 Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2009-12 Sampled and proofread 2009-12 Text and markup reviewed and edited 2010-04 Batch review (QC) and XML conversion
The Last WILL and TESTAMENT OF FATHER PETRES . I. IN his Holyness Name , With Amen I proclaim My Last Will and Testament following : Who in Body am well , But in Mind monstrous ill ; While in dismal Dispair I am wallowing . II. My Soul I bequeath , To the Regions beneath ; It has long to the Devil been due : To be tortur'd in pain , More than I did ordain To inflict on the Heretick Crew . III. My Body a pledge , I give to the Sledge , To ride on 't to Tyborn in state : And there in a Cart , Before I depart , All my Villainous Actions relate . IV. When the Rout I 've harang'd , To submit to be Hang'd ; And ere Dead to be cut down and Quarter'd : While each Blockhead and Whore , Dips a Clout in my Gore , To proclaim to the World I am Martyr'd . V. My Politick Head With my Quarters when Dead , Each one to be perch'd on a Pole ; Thus by prophetick Spirit , According to Merit , I 've dispos'd of my Body and Soul. VI. And next I declare Not to mention an Heir , My Executors wholly and full , To Cut of all other , The Spark and his Mother , Who Three Politick Nations wou'd Gull. VII . My Funeral Charge , As it will not be large , So 't will take up less Room in my Will : But were it much more , Since I die on this Score , They 'll never be troubled with Bill . VIII . It may do 'em both good For all their High Blood , 'T is full Threescore thousand Compleat : As I got it by Fools , So I leave it to Tools , While the Church and Relations I Cheat. IX . My Books , tho' not many , For I never lov'd any , They may keep for their private Occasions ; They 're of Riddles and Dreams , From whence I took Themes To furnish my self with Orations . X. The rest of my Stuff , Since they have enough , I Bequeath to a pretty young Sinner ; T will furnish a Room 'To practise at Home , And Encourage a happy Beginner . XI . I 'll not give 'em the Trouble To pay the Priests double , To fetch me from Purgatory : For that like the rest Of our Creed , is a Jest ; And as true as the Song of John Dory . XII . For if there 's a Hell , I deserve it so well I need not Dispair of the Place ; And none but an Ass Will believe that the Mass , Can ever restore him to Grace . XIII . I confess there are Fools , Which our Church daily Gulls , And particularly with this Notion : Such as when they do Pray , Know not one word they say , 'T is their Ignorance helps their Devotion . XIV . But I am wide of my Text , Being damnably vext To see how the Jesuits are Fool'd ; And your Prospects of Peace Do's my Torments increase , More than loosing my Life and my Gold. XV. On our Brotherhood all May my last Blessing fall , And on every Monk , Friar and Priest ; May they ere 't is too late Partake of my Fate , And become every Hereticks Jest . XVI . I wou'd have Enlarg'd , But my Conscience discharg'd , I 'll here make an End of my Sermon , And wish all this Throng May be damn'd , Old and Young , And so drive away Honest Carman . FINIS .