Her Answer to Prince Roberts white Dog .

Grumbling Sir or counterfeit Lapland Lady I admire thy impudence in calling thy self a Lady : Art thou a Lady and hast so much haire between thy legs and every where else ? thou wouldst be a rough bed fellow for the Divell himself ; if thou art not a Divell thy self , thou hast conditions sutable , to thy shape for thou doest snarle and bite at the Parliament , and hast learnt that quality from other Popish dogs , good thou canst do none to the Prince for that is contrary to the nature of a Witch , which in some respects thou unjustly doest assume , but in other conditions most fitly , for a Witch will dine or suppe with a roasted crab squittering in the fire , or with a few boild Onions , and a draught of Buttermilke which one of her neighbours gave her for fear more then for love , but thou doest fare most deliciously of the rumps and wings of Capons and kidneys and art indeed better fed then taught . Besides a Witch will lie upon an old straw bed with her house Cat which seems instead of her bedfellow . But the Kings chair of state & all the embroydered velvet stools are thy day couches , where thou lyest and sleepest with thy malignant eyes half open , and canst winke at small and great faults as thou doest see occasion . But then thou art a Witch again in some conditions , for they are overgrown with ugly gray hair which hangs down about their shoulders , and so art thou Boy . Witches are ready to doe mischief , but can do no good , and such are thy malignant qualities Boy : and moreover Witches are generally hated of all religious and well affected people , and so art thou Boy . Pardon me for though our gracious King loves thee , it is not as thou art a Witch , but as thou art Prince Roberts Dog ; and for thy Art in finding out conceald goods , I wonder how thou durst say that thou didst discover that plate which my Lord Say could not , it is as true as that there is a candle constantly burning in thy breech wherewith thou lightest thy self every night to bed : you say moreover that the Colledge plate is melted in New-Hall Inne ; truly I beleeve there is much coyning at Oxford and especially of misconstructions against the Parliament : which having the Kings stamp put upon them do run currant among the Cavaleers , and through the whole country round about : Now for the languages wherewith this beast is endued , there is as much difference between him and a linguist , as there is between Bagshot and Bowwow ; or speaking , and all his discourse is but a constant lying and fawning exprest by flattering actions , in which discourses his wagging tail speaks more then his mouth doth ; and it is the expectation of some dainty bit that whispers him in the eare , and doth make the spirit of this dogged Animall very pleasant and loving .

He neither speaks Hebrew nor Dutch as some doe conceave , but all his language is quià nunc do you grumble , and it is most certain that his stinking breath dwels round about Oxford ; the curs infectious vapour is the cause ( as some conjecture ) that the plague is now there .

For his Logick he has no reason to dispute withall , and had rather chop up a good pudding then chop Logick amongst the Sophisters , yet if he could dispute he would wrangle and bawle extreamly , for he has impudence enough , and if he were put to silence he would blush no more then a black dog : And for his discoveries what can Boy doe ? indeed he hath a good nose , so that if a sirreverence should by some of the slovenly Guard be laid in Christ-Church Quadrangle , he would quickly smell it out and bewray the matter ; for he is very neat in his carriage , and when he pisses against a wall he will lift up his leg for fear of spoiling his court stockings .

I doe not beleeve that he is weapon proofe ; or hath made his Master Prince Robert so , or that poison cannot hurt him , for I do not think but a sound stroke with a whip would make him cry peccavi ; that is , he would confesse that he had offended against the King and Parliament ; and besides , the Parliaments Bitch could ( if she would be so malicious ) bite him so sorely , that he should ever afterward halt of a leg ; and indeed I think he is of a poisonous nature himself , and yet let him take heed of wenching , or rather bitchering in Oxford , lest the hair of his head , and likewise the hair of his body do fall off before it come to tanning , and so be compelled to wear a Court Periwig .

As for his going between Oxford and London every week oftner than the three Carriers do , it is in truth a very lie , for it is against the nature of a body to be in divers places at once : indeed I beleeve he is a spirit of the Buttery , and doth often walke there invisible , and make the Scholers of Oxford turne all Malignants against the Parliament ; he leads the Doctors and Proctors in a string as a little dog doth the blinde man here in London .

Neither did Prince Robert disguise himself in so many shapes , like an Appleman at Dunsmore heath , like a Netseller at Coventry , and like an old woman at Daventry by the help of Boy ; for how could he furnish him with Properties , and severall shapes ? A dogs leg he could assoon .

For his behaviour to others , it is said to be loose and strumpet-like , and therein he is like Prince Roberts Monkey , whom the Parliaments Bitch shall answer hereafter , and make her grin for anger .

For the Princes familiarity with him , it is but for his recreation , not for any affection he bears unto him , as he doth ( I warrant you ) to a Court Lady , nay , to any country wench upon a case of necessity ; but let him not brag of that , for if he have kift the Prince once , his head hath afterward been twice in the Porridge pot ; and when he runs about to smell out Oxford Bitches that are full of concupisence , where is his nose then ? The King and his children are thought to be very well beloved by Boy , but in regard he is a Malignant the Parliament Bitch dare affirme that he cannot love the King , and hate and grumble against the Parliament as he and other Popish dogs do .

And whereas it is thought that Boy was a malignant against the City petition delivered by six Aldermen , I know and beleeve that he understood nere a word of it , nor knowes any letters but R. whereby he doth expresse his anger when he barkes , and he doth not care whether the King come to White-Hall or not , for wheresoever he is he can but feed daintily & be Prince Roberts white Boy .

As for London and the taking thereof , we have dogs enough that will take the Parliaments Bitches side , as Pepper Tobies dog , and Isaacs dog , and Greens dog , and a great many puppie-dogs , and curs that will domineer on their own dunghill , and keep out Prince Roberts dog in despite of his teeth ; and thus I conclude the answer to Prince Roberts dog called Boy , advising every one that he is an Imposture , a very juggling Boy , and a very cowardly malignant our , though he look like a lion .

The Answer to Prince Roberts Monkey .

I can hardly with any patience vouchsafe an answer to this unclean beast this thing composed of nothing but mocking and grinning at her betters , and she forsooth amongst the rest will needs be a malignant , but as she is tied fast with a chaine , so it is not to be doubted but all delinquents and malignants that oppose the Parliaments Bitch shall be confined in prisons untill they leave their Monkish qualities , and prove well affected to the orderly proceedings of the Parliament . But how can a Monkey have good conditions since her shape is so ugly , so deformed that she compares her self to I know not what ?

For her Jugling of the pay out of the Parliament souldiers heads , it is well known she can do no such matter , but the Captaines keep it back contrary to the minde of the Parliament : and besides though I beleeve there are Monkeys in the Parliaments Army , yet they are often conicatcht themselves , and cannot deceive poor souldiers of their pay , and Prince Roberts Monkey dare not come thither left the Parliaments Bitch should tear her green coat off from her back . She hath indeed many mad tricks whereof she boasts , but why she should be breached for them I know not , if she were ever such a creature as Tobies Dog was , there were some reason to bear a little zealous affection towards her ; for he was gentle and milde and a good oldmans Dog , but this is a grinning , mocking curst thing and a prophane wretched creature that would bring Prince Robert to love nothing but effeminate wantonnesse as her self doth .

But I pray what do all her tricks gain her ? why nothing but contempt and scorn , the Guard will play with her as boldly as her Master , and feele and handle her all over , surely if she had any goodnesse she would blush and hereafter order her self as d●inurely as if she were a Monkey that had been carryed to New England , and now brought over again , for there are such Monkeys now in England .

Let her never thinke that with her mowing at the Parliament , she can discountenance them and Religion ; for they regard Prince Roberts dog no more then they do a grumbling Cur , and his Monkey they esteem no more then a Jester , there are greater malignants that must be brought to triall , and then Prince Roberts Dog will be taught better manners .

Thus you see what the Parliaments Bitch ( if she could speak ) would answer to Prince Roberts Malignant Dog and Monkey , but she being of a modest nature doth earnestly desire that they may be both sent for and punisht as Delinquents , or else that they may hang tell they mend .